The Chaser Report - Lying Liars Who Lie Lied | Andrew Hansen

Episode Date: March 5, 2023

Dom asks the question: If a liar tells the truth about being a liar, are they a liar? If they work for Murdoch, the answer is yes. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Chaser Report is recorded on Gadigal Land. Striving for mediocrity in a world of excellence, this is The Chaser Report. Hello and welcome to The Chaser Report. I'm Charles Firth and with me today is Dom Knight. Hey, and Andrew Hanson again. And Andrew Hansen, incessantly plugging his tour of Australia. Yeah, look, let's talk about that another day. I don't want to open that present yet of just hearing.

No, no, no, don't worry about that. I want to talk about the news. There's a lot happening. Post has an ambitious new plan to return to profitability. Governor Indonesia has a brilliant solution for fixing school. And Robert Murdoch has finally fessed up about what Fox News actually does at a position in America. Unbridled good for the world? Yes, no.

It's absolutely no issue with it at all. Let's start there, because this is a fascinating story. To give the context for this, as you may recall, Joe Biden won the 20-20 U.S. election legitimately. I'm just going to say that so that people spam me on Twitter about how A bit controversial, controversial statement that's a little bit controversial. So one of the

elements of this was that they claimed that the voting machines were rigged, right? And one of the companies that makes them is called Dominion Systems. Yes. And they were so incensed at the endless claims about their machines being rigged and unreliable and so on that they sued Fox News

$6 billion US dollars. Because obviously if they can't be relied on, they're in business would fall over and, you know, the voting machines wouldn't work. $1.6 billion is, incidentally, the amount of money that Lachlan Murdoch has in his superannuation account. Anyway, he must be sorry about the new tax. Oh, absolutely. I think we might see his newspapers coming out against it quite soon.

So they managed to get Murdoch to file deposition. You're probably seen it in succession. It's where you go into a room and you have to give evidence on oath, but it's not in a court. It's just sitting down with lawyers. They do that at America. You're not here. And so he was being asked about what was happening. And he admitted several things.

He that he knew that Fox News hosts spread lies about the theft of the election. And he was happy to keep letting them do this. He was just completely up front because he was on oath. Yes, right. And also, presumably, he doesn't really care. Like, if you're Rupert Murdoch and you want people to think that Biden is illegitimate, you don't care if it's a lie or not. Well, also, did he sort of go, yeah, I did, what's the big deal?

He's 91 years old. The chances of any consequences coming to him are very, very slim. He's at 91 years of no consequence in life. Yeah, they're not going to start now. Yeah, why would he do that? And so he just said, they just said, are you aware that people like Lou Dobbs and Janine Piro and Sean Hannity endorsed these false claims? And he said, yep, they endorsed them.

It's quite extraordinary. So does that pose any problems in the? the Dominion case? Like, is part of the Dominion's case, the Foxhost lie? Like, it's not just that they lied. It's that they knew and lied. So, for instance, you're not going to believe this, but Sean Hannity in text messages that were published, you know, during the court process, was aware that this stuff was

bullshit and yet still went on the air and said it. That's what gets really bad. Because it's not free speech. It's malicious. If you know the truth and you choose to share a lie. It depends on what the court says But yeah, it says here But hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on,

Dom, you're being far too idealistic The way America works is They've got this Supreme Court Which is completely stacked out by Trump I think he appointed about four of the seven Or nine people on the court, is it? Three, but it was enough. Yeah, yeah, yeah, he's sort of stacked out that chord

So surely when it eventually ends up at the Supreme Court, they'll go, oh no, no, it is free speech to be able to lie blatantly on air. You know what I mean? Like, isn't the whole system completely rigged? So this whole idea that anything bad will ever happen to the Murdox is... Oh, I don't think that anything bad's going to happen. I think they'll probably win the case on the First Amendment on some sort of dodgy get-out.

This is as good as it gets. Oh, okay. As good as it gets, the only session is some parts of the media getting really upset about things like, for instance, Tucker Carlson, texted Sidney Powell is lying. Now, Sydney Powell is that wacky lawyer who went and did all the news circuit and made all these claims

about Dominion's voting machines. Tucker Carlson knew they were lying, but still went on the air anyway and just basically gave her a platform and interviewed her and endorsed her. So do you think the chaser should move into just wholesale lying about public figures?

Yes. We've been lying since we started publishing circulation figures in the old newspaper But the world has moved on Charles and Dom I think the thing that you're missing is that in the

sort of post-Trump you know all right era lying nobody no one's bothered about you know if somebody lies anymore lying used to be seen as a bad thing to do whereas now it's in a day

regur it's simply fine and no one cares about facts anymore and they're like yeah okay So I'm being lied to it, but that's fine, but I agree anyway. This is particularly the American mindset is, oh yeah, I know he's lying, but I agree with him. So, you know, let's get behind this liar. That's the mindset now. And in some ways, people respect you more if you lie.

Well, it's tough. You know, only a tough man would like like an alpha male lies to get a head. I mean, Donald Trump's conviction. It's true. People are really, they might not like everything he does, but they really admire his conviction. He wholeheartedly believes. Conviction. Conviction. Yes, no, no.

Telling the truth is for losers and wimps. As opposed to conviction in a court of law, which will never happen to Donald Trump. So the point is that actually, it's not so much... So before, like, I think it was Goebbels who said, you know, that you can... The art of the big lie, you know, you can get away with a big lie. It's easier to get away with a big lie than a small lie because you can convince sort of half the population about a big lie, right? But what you're saying, Andrew, is now all sorts of lies, even really small lies. You can have a fun-sized lie.

It's transformed the way we live. It's made all sorts of things easier. It's made marriages much easier to negotiate. It's filled them with lies. It's made selling products much easier. Just claims it does any old thing. Andrew, I've heard your new tour is fantastic. Everyone's been talking about it.

That's right. I've been lying. I've been telling everyone. My tour was really, really entertaining. If anyone enjoyed the brief moment of just the honest truth that Fox hosts knowingly lie, they just go on the air and knowingly lie. But we already knew that. Like, you should have saying something that we already knew.

But we didn't know that they texted on the very day of their broadcast. Yeah. They've been caught with their pants down. Yeah. Which. On something that we absolutely knew that they did. Yeah. Yeah.

This changes absolutely nothing. Yeah. There will be no consequences. Even if they have to pay out a bit of money, it's not going to affect them in any way. I'll just turn it back from peddling lies. Well, that should be the headline, shouldn't it, Charles? Liars caught lying. Actually, that's true.

I mean, Al Franken years ago wrote that book, Lies and the Lying Lies. Dela or whatever it is. Yeah, lies and the lying lies, you tell them. So this matters not at all, but it's a brief moment of, not consequences, just honesty. The Chaser Report, news you know you can't trust. Let's move on, though, because you're going to love this, Charles. I know you've got beef with The Australia Post. Well, my issue with the Australia Post is that, and this is honestly true, Andrew,

you probably haven't heard about this, but I got a big pack of Qantas merch bags, like Qantas, you know, merch bags. They were supposed to be delivered in sort of late November last year. Right, like comedy merch. sort of comedy pistakes of Qantas merch Yeah, yeah, that you create it. And they got as far as, so I live in the centre of Sydney, they got as far as Macquarie Park,

which is about, I don't know, maybe 20 minutes drive away, right? And on the app, you could see, on their tracking, you could see it just got stuck there, right? And then it went between there and a place in Croydon and back again to Australia Post facilities, right, back and forth. And after about a week or two of this, It was getting quite close to Christmas. I really needed to sell this merch.

I rang up Australia Post, and they went, oh, yes, yes, we can see that. Yes, yes. Yes, it seems to be stuck at Macquarie Park for some reason. It's all right. I'll contact the thing and they'll, you know, release it, right? And then I called back a few days later and they said, oh, yes, they had a meeting. They had a meeting about that box. Your box had a meeting.

Yes, they had a meeting about it. What? I mean, it's not like they're accessible a bureaucratic or anything. Nothing. They didn't move the box. They said, oh, yeah, there's a problem with the box. Anyway, so then, and it just kept on going like that, right?

Do you reckon the box were just sitting on the table in the meeting as well, with them all just staring at the box? They're going to get into the room. That's as far as they moved in. Yeah. No, no, literally, at one point, they said, oh, yeah, we can see the box? And it was like, can I just come to McCrory Park? You can give it to me.

They can see in the box. Yes, you can drive there. So then I said, can I file a complaint, like about a non-delivery? And they said to me, no, you can't because you've got to wait 90 days before it's officially not delivered. And anyway, it hasn't been lost. We know where it is. Yeah, so you can see it. Right in front of me.

You can't file it. You can't file it. I'm holding the box in my hands, Mr Firth. You cannot complain about it while I've got it right here. You know what the bags say on the menu? They say my other bags were lost by the airline. Yes. They're deeply, deeply, I'm worried.

Whereas these ones were lost by Australia Post. Anyway, and this is God's honest truth. The solution to this was, because I talked to the Chinese manufacturer about this terrible problem, and they said, we'll just send you some more. So the bags, the replacement bags, have arrived from China faster than they've arrived from Macquarie Park, right? And so, and anyway, so they are now on sale at chaser's shop.com if you want a ridiculously stupid bag. But, like, it's a perfect gift for Christmas last year. You know, you should buy one now.

But anyway, that is my beef with the Australia Post. They are beyond shit. Andrew, are you okay with Australia Post? have you got issued? Before I reveal the bright new future of Australia Post that will fix everything Have you got beef with them? No, I mean, the thing I like about Australia Post

is with the deliveries that if you own a house, say not an apartment and they deliver the parcel, it could be, they could leave it anywhere on your property and it's a kind of a challenge, it's a nice fun game to try and work out where the parcel might be you know, it could be in the

azaleas and the front brown. You just looked in a humble brag about art in your house. But didn't you once have one where they left it on the roof? Didn't they throw it and... Yeah, that was in the news.

There's a story about... It was actually in the news. You can look this up. Yeah, one guy came home and the Australia Post partially wondered where it was and then he looked up and it was on his roof.

And then the Postie... Technically to leave it. Had left him a lovely little note and the news had the note as well. And the little note said apologies, your parcel is on roof, maybe use broom to get it down.

So the thoughtful posteer had offered him some advice on how to retreat to retreat. Unfortunately he ordered his broom by Australia Post. Okay, so critics of Australia Post say that these days it's really expensive

to send letters. I mean the price is very high. It takes forever to come and I mean there are some days when it feels like the Posty doesn't even come to your street. Well, they don't do they only come three days. a week. So what's happening is that Australia Post has unfortunately posted a major loss now that the pandemic's over and we're not using their services all the time.

They lost $197 million for the last full year to December. Right. So the solution that's been... Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Hey, hang on, hang on. During the pandemic, when everyone was locked down and ordered everything online and everything got delivered online, that's when they made it. made money in a hostage situation.

In a hostage situation, they managed to lose money. So I'm going to read you this headline from Sydney Morning Herald about the solution to Australia Post. Australia Post floats new plan, slower, less frequent and more expensive. That is honestly the plan. Is there going to be on the ads? I hope so. They're going to put prices up.

So they just put prices up. Stamps are $1.20 instead of $1.10. and they're going to put it up considerably more and they're going to relax letter delivery frequency and potentially deregulate the priority letter service to allow slower speeds. So you'll still pay for Express Post

it just won't in any way resemble anything that's expressed. Well, that sounds like a good thing. This is great. I mean, look, I do hope they're handing around a lot of Cartier watches as congratulations for this idea. I wonder if they lost most of their money just having so many meetings about child as box.

Of course they can't deliver anything else. They're all sitting there worrying about Charles's box and the rest of Australia can't get our parcels delivered. All right. Well, the final... No, no, no. Can I just say, I guarantee

that plan will never happen. And the reason why is because they have, the way that they have announced this plan is they posted it to the appropriate minister. Yeah, they've got to have several meetings. It's not that we've lost the profits. Minister. We know where they are. You can't complain. Okay, final story from the news this week that

I want to talk to you both about. It comes from Kupang in West Timor, the Indonesian bit of the island Timor, which they should definitely give back. But anyway, the governor has decided that school should begin at 5 a.m. So public high school students in the capital are getting to school at 5 a.m. And this is because, he said, sent a speech to education officials recently. Students can sleep at 10pm and wake at 4 a.m. 6 hours of sleep is enough. Bath for 30 minutes, travel to school for 30 minutes because nowhere's far in this city.

You can be at school by 5 a.m. That's his vision for the future of education. Charles, as a parent of teenagers, how well do you think that would work here? Oh, look, my 14-year-olds hunt will love this idea. I think, yeah, like the earlier, the better for teenagers. That's their mantra It's always Dad, Dad, wake up

It's 5am We're running late And the amazing thing about this Is it school in this part of Indonesia Already begins at 7am But surely I'll tell you what Hartley would honestly do In that circumstance

Is he just would not go to sleep Like what he would do Is he would stay up all night Go to school and then come home and sleep in the early afternoon. That would probably, they probably actually better fits his biarrhythm. You reckon?

Actually, I think that that's it. I think we should implement it here. I think also, I think school is about doing something that you hate, right? Because it's training you for the rest of your life. That's true, actually. It's about, you know, oh, I've got to go to work. Oh, I've got to go to school, sort of thing.

So, so, yeah, I think 5 a.m., yeah, let's do it. Start the misery earlier. Yeah. I just love this. The local education, like the local union and education leaders and so on, have had to try and mount a reasonable argument as to why this is ridiculous. And they've just said, oh, sleep's very important for growing children. This guy doesn't give a shit.

This is a start at 5 in the morning. So there you go. That's the solution to Australian children falling behind in global standards. Yeah. One of the objections raised is that there is no public. transport available in the city at 4.30 in the morning. Oh, but imagine that governor, though, I can guess his answer to that. Something is going to be something like, walking 400 kilometres a day is good for you.

I mean, he sounds like the most hard-ass guy I've ever heard of. So, I mean, my daughter, I had to get up at 7 o'clock this morning to go in early for activity. And, oh, my God, the fuss that she made. So tomorrow I'm going to do it in Indonesian style and wake up at 4 in the morning. That's it for the news this week. Gary Husson Road, we're part of the Icona class network and these two idiots want you to go and see their live shows I advise against it but if you want to

Mr Andrew Hanson.com or what chaser.com that are you slash live um no no wankanomics.com oh wankanomics.com okay a whole new website that'll that'll work