The Chaser Report - May The 4th'd Puns Please Stop | Katy Gallagher

Episode Date: May 4, 2022

To celebrate Star Wars day Dom shares the best and dankest memes from the political parties, and Charles pretends to not like Star Wars. Meanwhile Shadow Finance Minister Katy Gallagher joins the show to unpack economic policy. Plus a brand new segment where we have an expert panel answer your most serious election questions! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In an election that will determine the fate of the entire universe, there's only one podcast holding politicians accountable. Scott Morrison, Anthony Albanese, who will move? Find out on The Chaser Report, Election Edition. Hello and welcome to the election edition of The Chaser Report. It's Wednesday the 4th of May, 17 days until Election Day. I'm Dom Knight. Hello, Charles Firth. The world is falling in, Dom, or the roof, the sky.

The sky is falling in. You don't even know what's falling in. I can't even talk. Things are going bad. It's such a disaster. The interest rates are rising. Yes. Nobody predicted, nobody could have known.

For the first time since, is it really 2010? It's been that like, what an extraordinary situation. Certainly the government could never have predicted this and put in place policy settings that allowed Australians to be able to afford it into the future. nothing like this is just out of the blue the banks were blindsided it took them as long as an hour or two to increase their interest rates

I mean yesterday nobody was talking about interest rates rising and then suddenly the RBA had their monthly meeting as scheduled which nobody saw coming nobody saw the meeting coming nobody knew and then suddenly interest rates are everything's rising

what's going on you have a mortgage don't you Charles I know I've got a Sydney sized mortgage. That's not fund size. That's the opposite of fund size. I listen to what Scott Morrison had to say about this, Charles, and you don't need to worry, because his argument was that homeowners,

such as yourself, had already priced this in. And the way he knew this was that we went from 20% to 40% of people having fixed their mortgage. So people who can afford to fix their mortgage, I've done it. Can I show you, I've got an offset account. Because that's what,

one of the ministers came out yesterday and condescendingly said, well, people should set up offset accounts, you know, to be more responsible with your mortgage money. Can I show you, Dom, and it's honestly true, this is my offset account. Our mortgage is due in three days' time. Look at how much money's in our offset account. Charles, I think you should get a job. 45 cents available.

Well, that still helps. That little bit helps. Yeah. I don't own a house. Yeah. I used to, and then as soon as I sold it. that houses became twice as expensive. So, yeah, we're screwed.

Well, you're feeling pretty smug at the moment. All these, well, I hate all these renters and these people who don't own houses, walking around with smiles on their face, all smug as if somehow you're benefiting. But haven't you heard rents have gone up massively? And availability of empty properties is like at a, at a low for a long time. So that's, that's difficult too. But Dom, Dom, Dom, yes. You're forgetting that we've had super.

economic management for the last nine years. There's nothing wrong. You are completely wrong that there is anything wrong with this economy. Yes. And the other thing to note is that if Labor were in charge, it would be a disaster. It would be like... It'd be like, you know, suddenly switching on

the Tesla autopilot and just going into a wall if Albo took over. Actually, Alba, if you're listening, if you win, can I just pitch a tent, like in the gardens of the lodge? Would that be all right? Just, you know, just a tiny... You won't even notice.

Yeah. Well, and it'll be partially owned by the government, which is his policy. Can you buy the tent for me? Actually, I think I'll need it. On today's show, economic management comes up in what I'm looking at, Charles, actually, which is the worst memes posted by the major parties for the past few weeks. And let's just say the economy features quite a lot. And we're talking to Katie Gallagher, who's the shadow finance spokesperson.

And so, yeah, the cost of living is going to be a big issue in that interview. Yes. And your question. answered. So we've filled it a whole lot of questions from voters all around Australia. We're going to answer them in a really serious, serious and sober way. Oh, that's so helpful. What a public service the Chaser is. Yes, exactly. But before we do any of that, let's check in with Charles's Daily Election Wrap. Hello and welcome to the election wrap for Wednesday, the 4th of May.

And we start today with the news that Scott Morrison is officially toast. That's right. With interest rates soaring, inflation out of control, and his economic credentials shredded, there is absolutely no way he can win from here, right? I mean, like, all the polls point to a coalition defeat. That's it. I mean, you know, Morrison is gone. To find an upset that big, you'd have to go all the way back to, well, the last election. I have always believed in miracles.

Even Scott Morrison seems to see the writing on the wall. The bitch of his voice has moved up an entire octave in the past 48 hours. It's not back to politics. And he spent much of yesterday arguing that the government shouldn't be held accountable for rising interest rates, which is interesting because here he is in 2008 arguing that the then Labor government should be held accountable for rising interest rates. And you could argue that they were somewhat successful in prosecuting an argument that if interest rates were to rise,

then the government should be accountable for those things. And as a result, the government should not be elected. Morrison seems to have decided that if you can't win it, you might as well go out with a bang. According to polling conducted by the Australia Institute, 75% of Australians support setting up a federal anti-corruption commission and only 7% of people are against it. So you'd expect Morrison to promise an anti-corruption commission,

even if he didn't mean it, you know, just like he did three years ago. Instead, he told Matthew Not, from the City Morning Health, Herald that an anti-corruption commission was dangerous and launched a passionate defence of pork barreling to allow politicians to, quote, do things needed in their communities without fearing the consequences from, quote, faceless officials. 17 days to go. That's the wrap for Wednesday the 4th of May. We'll be back in a sec.

The Chaser Report, election edition. Hello, and welcome to a new segment called Stupid Questions Only Questions. No other podcast is doing this, Charles. No, that's right. You know, you hear on other podcasts all these interesting, insightful questions about the process of the election. Preference whisperers, yeah.

Yeah, how it all works. We are the site, you know, if you've got a question that's really stupid about this election, this is the podcast. us to ask it to. No question too stupid. I'm sure you're a one-nation voter who wants to know whether you can vote with Penn. And we've got a bit of an expert panel assembled here to answer your questions today. Me and Dom.

That's right. Yeah. Bring them on. So anyway, so we've filled it a whole lot of questions and we've got some doozies here from our listeners. So there's a genuine listener questions. So the first one is from Mrs. S.L. Smith. Right. Who asks, was an uncooked chicken curry the cause of the Engadine incident?

Well, Charles, you called it first. I think you were the first to cast aspersions on the quality of the meat in Scott Morrison's strong curry and whether it had been cooked. Yes, it was clearly raw. No, PM said it was the light shining on the chicken in an unusual way. Oh, I see. And some people ask for seconds

and then experienced the second three or four times vomiting it up. So I think you can probably say, yes, although isn't the point that Scott Morrison, There is no record of Scott Morrison ever liking Curry at all until he became Prime Minister. He said there was a sort of moment when his PR handlers said, oh, you've got to have something that makes you look like not a racist. And then suddenly he became Mr. Curry Man. So I would say, no, I don't think, because in the Ingadine Macas happened in 1997,

I don't think he'd had a curry back then. But also, let's not rule out the ability of any McDonald's to give some. someone the runs. Yeah, that's right. Exactly. Let's not be unfair on McDonald's. Now, next one. Ooh, this is a good one.

This is from Angry Angus. Angry Angus. Yes. Who says, how long will it take for Scott to blame Jenny for losing the election? Jenny and the girls, be fair. Jenny and the girls, yeah, yeah.

I think you'll do it during his concession speech, won't he? Won't he blame Dan Andrews? Yes. And Anastasia Palis-A. Well, I think that'll be, the Murdoch press will blame. name Dan Andrew.

And Mark McGowan. And Mark McGowan. It won't be Scott's fault. If he loses, it definitely won't be him. It will be, if the voters will have gotten it wrong and let him down. Yes. So it's not even Jenny's fault, really. Actually, Jenny probably voted for the other candidate, I suppose that at this point.

David Peepers asks, why does Barnaby Joyce keep getting reelected? Is there something in the water in New England? I think it's called conservatism. I don't know. I've heard that he's a very, very attentive. local member. Yes, his member is extremely active in the electorate. And he's, you know, he's, you know, man of traditional family values, which explains why

he's got so many of them. Hmm. Yeah. I think basically, if you live in that electorate, Barnaby comes and drinks at your local on a weekly basis, no matter where you are, everyone goes through them all. Now, Dr. Wes, this is the next question. Dr. Wes, what happened to Christian Porter? I could tell you.

Yes. But you'd have to put a million dollars in my blind trust. Yeah, because, I mean, do we ever find out whether there was money left over in his blind trust after he got all the... No, because it's blind. I mean, anything could have been, couldn't happen with that. He did actually appeal one of the decisions last week, I happened to know. Oh, did he? It was in court again, yeah.

Why would you want to keep beating that drum? Well, we've seen a lot of self-harming defamation cases recently, and Ben Robert Smith take a bow, mate. But the Christian Porter one, he imulated his... career over it. No, but I think this one was about that, remember, they chucked the barrister off the case. They got the barrister chucked off the case because of the thing. And I think they're appealing the costs ruling because the cost ruling is like half a million dollars. So that might be one where you want to sort of go, yeah, could we just try and get some money back?

Gosh, I hope Joe Dyer's got a blind trust too. In case she loses. We should get her on the podcast. We should. We should we have before. We'll get her again. Okay. Oh, okay, this is a good one. How many, this is from at How Many Eggings on Twitter.

Oh. What is the best genital to draw on my ballot card? Well, I think in this day of being aware of gender as a spectrum. Yes. It was traditionally just the dick, but I think you should draw every genital you can think of. Yes. It really is a spectrum from left to right. Yes.

I mean, I always draw a clitoris on my ballot paper, just, you know, for gender equity. purposes and, you know, just to balance things up. But apparently the counters can never find it. You can just draw Peter Dutton. They'll know what you mean. Yeah. Oh, well, next question is John Leo 615, who asks, what is Peter Dutton? Well, have they taken a biopsy?

No, well, the answer is very clear, which is he can be lots of things. He can be a hash brown. He can be French fries. He can be mashed potato. He can be... I mean, there's a hot roast, baked. Well, you know what he can't be? Right.

Prime Minister, because he can't count. Okay, we'll have two more questions. Second last question is Matt Haggis, 666, who asks, if Labor win, who will be the first to backstep? Well, I mean, it's not going to happen, so I don't think we need... It doesn't even matter, but...

It's true. Wouldn't it be amazing if Albo stabbed himself? Yeah. It's never happened before. No. But Albo was the one. who was always against all the backstab. Yeah, he was the one who cried because they hurt Kevin.

He was the one person who was worried about Kevin Rudd's feelings in all of this. Yeah, yeah. I think I know the answer to this. What is the answer? Well, you might remember there's been a bit of a debate during the campaign about, you know, why Bill Shorten and Tanja Plybsech weren't really used very much. The answer obviously being they lost last time by a huge amount. But Tany Plibertset came out and said, there's no problem here.

Albao and I are great friends. We're into joining electorates. We've been good mates since so was 14. So clearly, Tanya Pliberstick is going to be the first and wielded knife. Well, you heard it here first. There you go. Your question's answered. We might do another segment of this before the end.

So let's keep the questions coming. Where do we submit them? Just go to our Twitter account, and we've set up a question where you can, like there's a thread where we ask you to, you know, to ask questions. But stupid questions only. Election News You Can't Trust, the Chaser Report. Charles, cost of living's been a bit of a factor in this campaign, hasn't it? Just a minor point that people have been discussing here and there.

I haven't noticed it. Like, I'm just used to spending 20 bucks on a piece of broccoli. Yeah, no, I've just looked at my bank's balance and there's nothing there. I think this is the only possible way life could be. But maybe there is another way. We have with us Shadow Finance Minister and Senator for the ACT. Katie Gallagher, Katie, thanks for joining us. Thanks for having me back on.

Now, Cady Gallagher, interest rates are soaring, inflation is through the roof, everything's going up in price. What has Labor been doing about cost of living pressures for the past nine years? Yeah, well, if you listen to Scott Morrison, it is all our fault or if it's not Labor's fault, it's the state's fault or somebody else's fault. But, yeah, this has been an issue that, yeah, has been around for a while now, like it's not just something that's happened in the last month as the Prime Minister would have you believe. And I think the real pressure comes from people's wages not keeping up. I mean, prices are going to go up. But if your wages aren't going up, that's actually what's creating the real pressure. And that's why it's probably the number one issue on the campaign, you know, for the last three weeks or so it's

to think everyone keeps raising wherever you go. Surely you understand that this is all international factors fault. Scott Morrison is not at all to blame here for his management of the economy. Yeah, well, it's funny when you watch him, as I have over the last few years, like whenever there's any good news, you've got to get out of the way between him and a camera and a microphone, he'll steamroll you in an attempt to, you know, get in front of it and say how great his economic plan is working. But the minute it gets a bit dodgy or the news isn't so good, the finger pointing starts going around.

Like, yeah, there's international factors for sure, but it's not everything. and their wage policy, deliberate design, feature to keep wages low, is now coming home to hurt them. I don't know. I reckon there's a little bit of hypocrisy there. You accuse Morrison of not taking responsibility for things. But at the same time, you're not even prepared to take responsibility for the last nine years of him and the coalition government being Prime Minister.

Like, you're not taking responsibility either. Where does the buck stop for Morrison's prime ministership, Patty Gallagher? If not you. Yeah, well, again, like we are often the source of his attention when it comes to deflecting blame, like the National Anti-Corruption Commission, apparently that's our fault that he can't introduce a bill into the Parliament because we won't support it, not that that stopped him attempting other pieces of legislation, but yeah, no, I'll take our fair share of the blame then if that's, you know, like Morrison blaming us because his economic plan isn't working.

You know, yeah, that makes complete logical sense to me. I've also been wondering, were you the person that put all that money in Christian Porter's slush fund? We'll never know, because it's blind. As a side note, presumably he said the president, any politician can just take donations and go, oh, I didn't know who was from, so therefore I don't have to declare it. Have you started doing that? Do you just take bribes now and say, oh, no, it's blind? Not at all.

Not at all. Well, you should. Well, look, I think it's a sign of, you know, maybe you're doing something right in politics if you don't have a need for one of those funds. I mean, let's remember why you had to get the fun going because he was busy suing everybody, I think, from memory. So, yeah.

No, I haven't had any need for one at all. And I'm not sure I would, I don't know, be able to raise that sort of cash. Who do we have to pay to get a federal ICAC, by the way, to look at this sort of stuff? Because I think if we just, if the nation just held its nose and paid that person, Yes. Then from then on the system would actually be... We bribes some scrutiny.

We bribed someone to set up a federal ICAC, and then their first job, we can be look at the bribes that we gave. Well, on a serious point, though, we do need one of those national anti-corruption commissions. I've been surprised how many people have raised it with me, actually, you know, as I'm out and about on the campaign. We got you to talk about cost of living increases and things like that.

That's why you're here today. And your solution is... increasing wages. Now, but wages are a function of worker power, right? And Scott Morrison keeps on pointing out, wages have nothing to do with the government at all. It's not his responsibility. It's just nothing to do with him.

Apparently a prime minister can't affect this policy at all. There's nothing you can do. Why are you even bothering to talk about wages? Yeah, well, it sort of makes you wonder why you even bother to show up if the government doesn't really do well, exactly, not when you need him. If you can't do anything about anything, then, you know, what is the point? You know, and then the flip side is why did Matthias Corman say that low wages were a deliberate design feature of their economic architecture? I mean, so they're having it one way, but beyond the other way, no, nothing, they can't do anything.

What you actually can you do? Like, are you going to, because for me, it's like, well, wages are a function of workers' power, right? And there's no, like, unions hardly exist anymore. Like how are you going to actually increase work? I mean, being a little bit serious for a second. Yeah, yeah, sure. How do you actually increase workers' power so that they can actually bargain for higher wages? Well, so there's a couple of things because it is about getting wages going,

but it's also about having the policy settings right in a couple of other areas. But if you start with wages, I think, you know, and Tony's outlined, Tony Burke for us. He was on the podcast last week. Yeah, radio. Okay, so there are some things you can do with the Fair Work Commission and looking at some of the problems we've got with insecure work because that's definitely a problem. If you speak in aged care, for example,

there's the claims that are before the Fair Work Commission. You know, Scott Morrison will say, well, there's nothing you can do to influence the Fair Work Commission. Well, I think that's probably news to all the business and unions who provide submissions to it and actually argue the case and put evidence before it. So there's things the government can do there. And then I think the other side of it is,

And this is where we've got a gripe with the government as well, which is, you know, they've got no long-term plan about, you know, skilling people up for the good jobs that are coming out, you know, our way in sort of advanced manufacturing. They're not seizing the opportunities that come from cheaper and renewable energy and the jobs that come with that. You know, they're not putting the investments in the care economy, which is another area of massive opportunity in terms of jobs growth. And I think it's all of those settings. and the government does have a role to play there. You know, this government comes with the view that they just want to keep wages low, and I think, you know, we're seeing the results of that. So they definitely influence.

But to be fair, some workers for coalition in Parliament have had some very big payouts recently. Yeah, they're not giving all wages. Look, we're trained journalists here at the jacer. And so it's very important that we put the counterfactual, like the other side of the argument, which is, so interest rates are going up. Costs of living's going up, that means businesses are hurting.

Surely a more sensible solution to the cost of living crisis is to cut wages. You know, by passing, say, the coalition's omnibus bill, there's going to be a whole bill to try and cut penalty rates after the election and the coalition. Get wages down because executive remuneration bonuses don't pay for themselves. Yeah, if you pay top executives more, then they'll have more disposable income to fit away on the small people. Yes, to trickle down. Yes, well, we've seen, I think we've seen a bit of that in the last few years.

Profits are up, wages are flatlined, and look where we are, you know, and people are pretty. Yeah, we're in a good situation. Can I say pretty pissed about it? Like, maybe I'm not like, am I not left. Is that a trickle down joke, Katie Gallagher? Hey, pissed. It was an accidental one, but, you know, like they are. Like, they're pretty cranky out on the streets because they get it when they go, you know,

pay for their child care. put the petrol in the car like you said you know buy your groceries i mean i my kid i've got a 16 year old he's basically carb loads the whole time right so you've got to buy a lot of bread and cheese i bought some cheese the other day was 13 dollars a block and it's like wow okay you know like it is hitting everybody every time they go and pay for something and and i think if you've got a prime minister says you know sorry um not my economic plan that's someone else's economic plan whoever it is I'm pointing the finger at, they're getting tired of that. The cost of Daffin was soaring.

Oh, will the Albanesey Labor Government commit to paying for a certain percentage of every block of cheese that I buy? Yeah, I shouldn't. It's probably risky making it about your own grocery shopping. But it's just like, if we run out of cheese, it's big, bad news in my house. Can I ask, though, because in terms of cost of living, housing is everyone's most significant expense, really. And your leader unveiled a policy on the weekend to get the government.

involved in buying houses for the most needy. I think it's capped at something like 10,000 people or something like that, though. Is it ambitious enough, given the extent of the problem? We have a situation where essentially anyone under the age of, I don't know, 35, thinks that there's no chance they'll ever own a house. And some of us who are a little bit older, struggle with that as well. Should Labor be going harder on things like social housing? Yeah, well, look, absolutely, the housing affordability crisis is real,

And you're right, anyone under 30, I think, has just basically given up. And they don't even have factored in their life plan that they will own a house. We're not pretending there's one policy that's going to deal with this. But I think the broader point, again, and this goes back to our frustration with the Prime Minister, about never his responsibility, is, you know, we need to get a national housing strategy. We need the states and territories and the councils at the table. They've got, you know, the levers around land supply and some of the arrangements they work in. And we've got to all pull in the same direction, which is, you know, look at how we make housing more affordable for those that want to get into the market, look at how we support people who are renting.

I mean, there's so many different kind of points to enter and work together on. But we've had, again, nine years of the government that thinks if you don't want to rent buy a house and it's completely out of touch with what's happening for people in their real life. So, yeah, it's a number of policies, essentially the short answer to that question. You ever think the economy is such a basket case that perhaps it's better to not take over? Like, it might be better to just leave it up to the coalition so you don't have to deal with the soaring interest rates, stagnant wages, inflation, you know, housing crisis. Like, there's so many things to do. Yeah. You think maybe it just might be better to just duck this one?

You're saying that to me at the halfway point of a pretty rugged election campaign. And so the real answer is absolutely not, like, we are up for the challenge. Yeah, we're not pretending that if we were fortunate enough to win that we walk in and day one and all these problems are no longer there. That's a huge problem. Like, you've now, that's a gap. That's a get. You've just made a gap.

I love the Sky News debate to my surprise. And one of the things that was, there was really a consensus about between Morrison and Albanese is Labor does the big stuff. and then the coalition coasts for a bit after that happens. And they say, you know, pay the bills and sort out the economy. If Alba wins, how many years do you think Labor gets for the coalition comes in and coasts for a decade again? Well, our plan is to be a really good government. Learn from, you know, previous experiences and, like, offer the Australian people

a good government with, you know, firmly a view on them and their issues. But, yeah, it's a very convenient way of rewriting history when you've had the libs who've opposed essentially all of those major reforms bar the NDIAS, I think, and they only came to that reluctantly to then turn around and go, yeah, yeah, no, we agreed with all of it. It's just, yeah, he's very good at rewriting history and trying to have the glib line to sort of skate on his way on through. But hopefully, you know, we'll be able to hold him to account through this campaign. We're doing our best. Now, the polls are looking pretty good for Labor at the moment,

but one of the interesting things about it is women have moved massively against Morrison, but men haven't. They're basically pegging at the same level of support that they have for Morrison three years ago. Now, what is wrong with women that they can't see what a top bloke Morrison is? Well, I would argue they probably have been watching for the past few years, three years at least, and they've made their mind up, you know. I don't know so much about polls. What do you reckon?

I really try not to look at them. They were never a feature of sort of my early political years in the ACT, so I like to go by gut instinct on these things. So I really don't watch the polls that much, but I would say that women have it right on this one. Well, the betting markets are basically $1.30 to Labor, and it's now blown out to about $3 or $3.20 for the, the coalition.

Aren't these ominous signs for Labor based on 2019? That's right. That's exactly what everyone was saying about Bill Shorten. So what are you planning to do when you lose? We're not planning on losing. And again, like no way. We are planning, we're working our butts off, man, to try and bring this home. We just think there's a real opportunity with comes with a change of government.

And I hope we can convince most of Australia that that's the right way to vote. We'll do our best over the next few days. Final thing I'm keen to know, Katie, is the last new Labor Prime Minister, Kevin Rudin, got two years. Do you think Labor's learnt from that experience if they do get another new PM in the Lodge? Yes. Okay. Rigging elections since before it was called The Chaser Report. Now, Charles, do you know what day it is today?

Oh, no. It's Star Wars Day. the day that emerged from a shithouse pun, may the fourth be with you, Charles. And that means this is the third anniversary of one of the dankest memes in the history of Australian politics when the Liberal Party official account

on the 4th of May 2019 tweeted, the economy is strong with this one in a picture of Scott Morrison with a lightsaber. So I thought we'd look today at whether any of the major parties dared to follow up with similar content this time around.

And while a lot of people have been looking at the very attractive pictures of the Met Gala, let me say that the meme gala is not nearly as hot. So, third anniversary, the Liberals followed it up with a sequel, really. They've got Anthony Albanesey in a Darth-Mall kind of Sithhood. What? And a red light-saber, the economy is weak with this one. Oh, no, that is not true. And it says, I have a bad feeling about this.

So clearly the same geniuses are still. running the Instagram account for the Liberals. Six comments when I checked earlier today. The first one was, keep that terrible. Content coming, fellas. So what do you do if you were Labor, Charles? If you were in charge of Labor's Instagram, would you acknowledge the Fourth of May at all?

The first rule of political meming is to not buy into the other people's frames. And, you know, the Libs have set this up as a terrible thing to do. You don't just then copy. Oh, wait a minute, it's the Labor Party. Yeah, the Labor Party. Not only if they copy it, but they copied it without a joke. Have a look at this. Oh, no.

They've got another Photoshop of Albo with a lightsaber as a Jedi. This one's blue. It just says Labor, a better future, may the fourth be with you. It's not even attempting to have a pun. You can't do memes without puns. They're just stolen the Liberal Party's meme. They only got 13 comments, and half of the comments, Charles, made the point that they'd posted it early at 10pm on the 3rd of May.

He heard of, mate. Oh, they got the numbers wrong. They couldn't even get that right. You've got to wait till the four. Remember the word four. Four. So Labor copied it worse and at the wrong time. That bodes very poorly for potential Labor and easy government.

But then they double down. They put even more. They've got Australians after a decade of flat wages and now rising prices under the Liberals of Morrison. A picture of Lando Corrissian. This deal is getting worse all the time. Again, no pun. But that's all right.

Because Lando curses, no, it's the deal. Because remember Lando did that deal. It's an analogy, but it's not a pun. What I want is shit puns. Fortunately, though, they're third. They went for a third one. This is a shit pun. It's Scott Morrison hugging the Death Star with the liberal logo on it.

The Debt Star. That's no moon. It's Morrison's massive debt. So now they're starting to deliver at this point. Wait a minute. So under their... In their Star Wars universe, Morrison is a Sith? Is that right?

He's built the Death Star, which seems unlikely. Scott Morrison doesn't finish in for structure project. That's why the Death Star was always half-filled. That's true. And it got asterix. Remember Morrison doubled the debt before COVID. But to be honest, there's very little from Labor in terms of dank memes. There's very few shit puns.

There's very few pop culture analogies. At one point, someone tweeted Scott Morrison explaining his plan to fix the rising cost living, and it's just a Simpsons meme. We've tried nothing and we're all out of ideas with Ned Flanders. So, again, no puns. Not impressive at all. But you know what, Charles, the Liberals are posting enough dank memes and crappy puns for all the other parties put together.

Instead of the, what is it, the Eldon Scrolls? It's the Labor Scrolls for Oblivious with our body on the video game cover. They went to town on a parody of new idea called No Idea, Anthony's secret move to PowerShare with Greens and Independence. Look, can I just ask you whether the effort to reward ratio is any good? Like, does anyone see these? Well, where are you getting these memes from? They're all from the official Liberal Party Instagram account,

and they've all got hundreds of likes. Right. But the question is, are they changing anybody's vote? I mean, if you're not sure about the liberty, you follow their account and just say, oh, that was a quality new idea, pun. Quick and easy recipe for a weak economy, I'm going to vote on the basis of that.

And this is the thing, they've just, The extraordinary amount of ways of banging on about Albo and the economy. Why would New Idea be running a recipe for a weak economy? Well, because it's Albo's no idea, Charles. It's satire. I just ready through some of the other ones. Instead of Stranger Things, they've got a video, uncosted things. They're not even trying to do a play on word.

Oh, no. They've got a Labour perfume called Weak Economy. Albo is James Bond. They call me 007, zero balance, budget, zero plan for the economy, and seven higher taxes. Instead of the Incredibles, they've got the incompetence with Albo and Tanya Plibersek

as the Incredibles. It just keeps going. Instead of finding Nemo, it's lying Albo. Can you stop this? I don't want to hear this anymore. But do you know the best thing that they've done, Charles,

and this is, is that much of the Liberal Party's Instagram account is simply reproductions of News Corp front covers. They've literally just, like, for instance, oh, that's so Albanesey.

That's really. That's the real satire. There's heaps of them. Every time there's a News Corp anti-albo cover, they just post it for the liberal account. Clive Palmer has actually done the best one, which is his Photoshop together, Albaugh and Scott Morrison,

as the same person as a generic white guy. Oh, that's... Which would work if he and Craig Kelly were not also generic white guys. Generic white guys. But the shittest memes of all are the Greens. Oh, really? Yes. Why does that somehow not surprise me? To me, the grains are the people that were really earnest at university.

Yes. That's who I... And they've all gotten together in a little earnestness bubble. For instance, it's a lack of self-awareness. I would be surprised if they wanted to do memes. Well, they don't do memes that are attacking or making fun of the opponents at all. Isn't they just a waste of carbon? Exactly.

Well, this is. You remember the so fresh, like, album collection of greatest hits for many, many years? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. They've done a parody of that. So fresh. Green hits of the election in 2022. It's got like sunflowers and tax the billionaires, dental and mental health into Medicare,

wipe student debt. So their ideas are so fresh with a parody of albums from the 90s. Oh, I see. So they're sort of instead of a negative... Yeah, they're doing positive memes. Yeah, positive memes. It doesn't make any sense. Except that would really work well as a negative meme put out by somebody else.

Because it'd be like, so fresh. You could just retweet all the Greens memes and make fun of them. But the best one of all... In a sarcastic voice, yeah. Is that they actually shared on Instagram a picture of a marijuana leaf with a 1970s style graphic saying legalised cannabis. I cannot believe the Chaser didn't put out as a parody first.

Well, it's a bit obvious, isn't it? So the bottom line is, Charles, on May the 4th, everyone who works in social media for a major party should be cast into the Salak Pit for a slow and painful day. I hate you, Dom. Don't hate the play, I hate the game. Our gear is from road microphones.

We're part of the A-cast Crowder Network. May the fourth be with. Oh, it's so bad. No, just no. The last three movies were shit anyway. Shut up, go away.