The Chaser Report - Qatar Government Claims Stadium Builders Died of 'Football Fever' | Sami Shah

Episode Date: November 23, 2022

Sami Shah and Dom Knight bring you all the commentary on the 2022 World Cup that would get them executed if they said in Qatar. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Chaser Report is recorded on Gatigul Land. Striving for mediocrity in a world of excellence, this is the Chaser Report. Hello, welcome to the Chaser Report. I'm Dom Knight, and in an upgrade from Charles Firth, we have Sammy Schar back on the podcast. Hello, Sammy, how are you? Hello, how you doing? What did you guys do with Charles this time? Look, someone had to be sacrificed to the Gattari authorities for another stadium.

They had a last minute problem with the stadium. needed a blood sacrifice, Charles was the clearest choice for the good of Qatar. Yeah, I mean, you'd think by now with all the blood sacrifices they've done of South Asian migrant workers, they would have had enough, but clearly, they needed one white guy. I think that was where it came down to. They had like 5,000 brown guys, but the one white guy's blood, that really takes it over the top. I mean, did they need it or did they just want it? It's so hard to tell with like Qatar runs their country. I mean, did they need the World Cup? No, Did they need to build six air-conditioned stadium or whatever it is in a country that you probably only would need at most one, if not half a stadium for them?

You know how always... You know, when you think of football, you always think of the petrol-rich nation of Qatar. Like, that is exactly who first comes to mind always. We think of the great footballing nations of the world. But also, I do wonder, when it comes to blood sacrifices, Does the race and ethnicity of the person matter? Like, think about it, if you're, like, if you're making a blood sacrifice to, like, an elder god, like Cthulhu, for example, a lovecraftian demon. Yeah.

Will it matter? I think there's definitely some, you know. Well, that's such a good question because, I mean, in the propaganda that my daughter is given by preschool, by some of the picture books she has, we're all the same on the inside, right? What's that on the outsides? But we're all the same on the inside. but clearly that's not true because our insides, if we're a migrant worker in Qatar,

are worth objectively less than anyone else's and the fact that we may have been killed and our inside, you know, buried. Yeah. Does not stop anyone else from going and enjoying a tournament of football. So I think Charles is probably worth very little on the open market, but I think that's been proven by a range of chase of merchandise.

But yes, I mean, it is a problem. This is something we knew about for many years. It's been discussed since the start of this thing. The way that they make people work in the sweltering heat, they get heat exhaustion and they die. They keep their passports so that they can't escape from this absolute literal hell. But on the other side, there's a World Cup and people play soccer. And I just think, you know what?

It's so hard to morally weigh up those two objectives, Sammy. I mean, which side would you come down? I just don't know. So, okay, here's the question. Are you a football slash soccer fan? Do you watch it at all? Because I ask this because I'm boycotting it, but also it's easy for me to boycott something I wouldn't watch anyway.

I am a fan and I, the thing I'm boycotting is going there. I really wanted to go to this one. And I had a moment where I was just like, should I just like, you know, I mean, part of the reason I'm boycotting it's because I can't afford it. Let's be clear. Right. It's not this noble thing. But it also, there was a moment there where I was just like, oh, I looked at the guitar

away's packages. It wasn't that expensive. And it was like, a couple of grand. I get to see lots of games. What is there to do in Qatar when you're not watching football? Turns out very little. Yeah. Largy getting arrested for wearing t-shirts is the other past.

Yes, that's certainly the national sport. Yeah, getting arrested for wearing t-shirts and drinking zero alcohol beer is all the other national sport. But no, so I do care. I do care a lot. I went to the World Cup in Germany. many, which was a little bit the opposite. There was, you had to drink beer at that one.

Okay, yeah, you know, he managed you. Got out of the airport and, yeah, a giant beer, Stein got pressed into your hands. It's very awkward for Muslim visitors. Yeah, so I do care. I love the World Cup. It's one of my favorite things, which is why I'm so fucked off with FIFA for ruining it so comprehensively.

I mean, we know that they're an evil scum-sucking organization. We know that they're basically like a sporting version of a terracelle or something. But how could that they're, fucked it up this monumentally to the point where you know the kataris even the kataris aren't even enjoying the world cup that they bought because everybody keeps criticizing people keep mentioning the human rights record and the fact that they keep getting up and going um but it's fine everyone's welcome no one believes them sammy it's can you imagine how sad it would be if you spent $150 billion or whatever it was on sports washing and it didn't even wash you clean well that's

that's just it right so i've i've completely boycotted like completely not a And it is admittedly easy for me to boycott it. Like I said, I don't give a shit about sports. I definitely don't give a shit about football. If, for example, it turns out that the Marvel Cinematic Universe was built on the backs of 5,000 South Asian workers who all died, you know, making the next Thor movie, I might have different conflicted feelings and I might be more traumatized by my decision to boycott. I'm not right now. But at the same time, and I have in the past very blatantly and obviously said many times, you choose. the boycotts that you can subscribe to.

I mean, I remember when the whole Sydney festival debate happened, a lot of people, a lot of artists who criticized for not boycotting it, I at the time had said very vocally, I think you can't judge people for what they do and don't boycott, but here I am personally now

judging people for not boycotting the Qatar thing. And I think for me, it's basically a couple of things. One is these are my people who die, right? It's South Asians. We are Indians, Pakistanis, Bangladeshis, we are the labor class of the world right now. Most of the Middle East, or I mean, large chunks of Europe, you know,

but here in Australia as well, we're the unseen labor class. Your Uber drivers, your healthcare workers, your construction workers everywhere, tend to be people from my background. And no one really cares about our living conditions, our working conditions, things like that, particularly in the Middle East. So that's part of it. Yes. The other part for me is I think Qatar, Saudi Arabia, the United Arab Emirates are fucking shitholes and everyone who lives there is absolutely worthless.

I do think all, you know, I think I can quite categorically say I'm vehemently racist against everyone of a Qatari background because of their ill contributions. How do you compare it with Queensland? Do you height the moralist than Queensland, send you? Here's what I'll say. I will say that in the time that I have. have, you know, been ranting about Queensland, many Queenslanders have approached me and said they agree. And I find that that level of self-reflection in the Queenslanders, something I didn't know they were capable of. You know, I thought Queenslanders were not like,

for example, dogs. You know, if you put a mirror in front of a dog, the dog thinks that's another dog. I thought Queenslanders were similar. If you put a mirror in front of Queenslander, they think that's another Queenslander. That kind of object permanence was beyond them. I have been wrong about that. It turns out some of them are actually human beings and I'm willing to accept that I was wrong with that. However, I refuse to accept that I'm wrong

about Qataris. Fuck those guys is what I will say now. I think that's where my hatred is now. What happens if you put a mirror in front of a Katari? The experiment with... A, the mirror will have to be put there by 5,000 laborers because the Qatari ain't fucking lifting anything. At least 3,000

laborers will die because the Qatari will insist the mirror being put outside in like 45 degree heat at like the middle of the afternoon and then the Qatari will come look at the mirror say reflections are against their cultural values and have the reflection arrested

you know so that's largely how that would go I think is the answer to your rich I imagine also strangely the mirror would be air conditioning in a completely unnecessary move and it'll get it to fuck you to the climate which is quite a strange business I mean have you've been there

I have you've been to Qatar Really? Okay. I've been to Doha Airport. Look, we went, my wife and I, we got married, we looked for the cheapest way to get a kind of weird fair that went to a whole bunch of places at once.

And we went through Doha Airport, which is absolutely massive to a completely pointless degree about three or four times. And at no time did it occur to us that it would be a good idea to leave the airport. And I really admire what we did with that. We didn't really know. the stance we were taking that we were joining your boycott against Qatar um but

inadvertent boycotts are the best kind you know how Dubai is an absolute like fantasy land playground of ridiculous ideas like there's a reclaimed series of islands off the coast in the shape of the world because fuck knows why right there's Dubai is what happens when you let architects have too much cocaine and and no and no restraints on their imagination or their ability to convince stupid Arabs into building shit. It is honestly Dubai is like what would happen if Donald Trump

actually was a billionaire and had unlimited money. I mean the stupidity that they have there is quite extraordinary. But you know what? I've always thought you buy it a little bit ridiculous but it's a fuckload better than going to Qatar. Apparently there's just nothing to do there whatsoever. One of the things they put the World Cup on

but neglected to actually ponder the notion of having anything for tourists to do. So yeah, they've got a few concerts and stuff like that, but actually going from what I hear and exploring Doha and just trying to figure out, you know, a great way to embrace the culture. People are like, yeah, no, no. What is the culture? Everyone keeps saying that. Even the Qataris are like, oh, well, we have our own culture. What is the culture? Other than making slaves build everything, what exactly is the cultural high point? Have you heard Qatari music, you know, that big Qatari musician rock band Dash or that famous

Qatari movie or that incredible Qatari book no their whole fucking culture is being rich that's it that's not a culture well you're I mean you're allowed to say that if I say that as as a white person I'll come across as racist and I don't

I think I think definitely that's the one brown privilege I have is shitting on the brown people and and I admire you for it and in some respects I'm jealous of that but I can't say that The Chaser Report news you can't trust Let's go to visit

Katar.com Sammy Let's see what things are to do. Visit is a sport for choice you'll be glad to know with a range of attractions from museums and galleries

market sports desert safaris or the spectacular inland sea or UNESCO listed Al Zubara Fort there's a thriving arts and culture scene

you'll be pleased to know hang out thriving Let's start first with the desert safari because there's nothing you want to see on a safari more than sand. There's nothing more varied in the landscape than sand. That thing that just stretches for miles in every direction

with no discernible difference that you can get lost in because every landmark looks identical to every other landmark, which is sand dunes. So that's the safari part. Okay, go on. But also, you know what a safari is a famous for, don't you? Yes, sand. You go on a safari to see,

animals in a sand safari you're just going well of course no animals live here because it's incredibly boring it's just sand tunes endlessly looking at this here um there is one uh thing very high on the list of things to do i'm in the kind of attractions and adventure and sports item number five i think you'll like this sammy i think it's a change your mind okay go for it go for they have angry birds world oh it's the first theme park based on the game angry birds You know how people, like my daughter right now, you know, she really wants to one day go to Florida to see Disneyland. She maybe wants to go to England to see a Harry Potter world. I'm going to take her instead to Doha and show her Angry Birds word and then see how long it takes her to plot my murder in my sleep.

I'm just looking at this now because, I mean, I enjoyed the game Angry Birds. Did you enjoy an upward world of it? I cannot feel of life of me. A world. I cannot imagine. What do you do? Do you fling actual birds at actual pigs with a catapult? Is it an animal abuse festival?

Is the other pigs allowed, given that Qatar is a Sunni Muslim country? That's a good point. Right? That's a very good point. How is Angry Birds halanify? Is the real question? That's a very good question. Our breathtaking array of themed rides will have you spinning, twisting, flying and moving with

laughs and screams along the way. It doesn't sound as though there's any catapulting of things at pigs. There's live shows with the actual characters from Angry Birds, so you're famous for not speaking. This is bizarre. Couldn't they get a license of anything half decent? You know what the Angry Birds world is testament to? It is testament to the Angry Birds copyright holder

being able to fool some fucking idiot into giving him a lot of money and mop out than him. I mean, full credit to the Angry Birds team. Yeah, yeah. That's far too much juice to squeeze from the lemon that is Angry Birds. There's a trampoline universe. Okay.

Within Angry Birds, well. I think I've looked enough at Angry Birds. All right. All right. What else is there to do in Qatar? There, oh, there are some World Cup stadia. Is Qatar good for cyclists? Apparently, it has the longest continual path in the games book of world records.

So there you go. Again, let's reiterate in 45 degrees heat. Yes. And presumably it's a straight line. And the signs just say ride this way to exit Qatar. And so people just keep going. Oh, boy. Yeah.

I mean, they've got a few things where they've paid incredibly. You know, it's famous architects to build museums and things. But I don't know that it's terribly exciting. What are the most exciting, it says here, what are the best things to do in Qatar for couples? We have many exquisite restaurants, including Nobu. People will also enjoy the cultural village, Doha Corniche, Inland Sea, and Mall.

You know who won't enjoy those things? Sammy, same-sex couples. Yeah, or actually even male-female couples. who decide to kiss each other in public out of love for one another because that's also not allowed public disabilities of affection are frowned upon same-sex couples can get fucked basically yeah so no it's it's going to be amazing I'm so glad that the FIFA World Cup decided

the FIFA organization decided this is who gets the World Cup which by the way Qatar I think already lost their first match so you know oh yes I mean of course they did yeah by the way I'm not making this us up, on visitkatar.com, guess what it is? Guess what it lists under under? Guess what it lists under what are the most important things to know about Qatar?

Is it? There's one, there is only one point. Is it, don't be gay? Pretty much. Qatar is a Muslim country and visitors are encouraged to dress modestly. So it's fucking hot and you've still got to wear this basically. All right, great. I am so glad that this is a place that all of a sudden I'm being berated.

Because that's the thing that annoys me, is the whole co-opting of anti-racist language. You know, you'll say things that people say things like, hey, don't be racist. But you can also say things like, hey, don't have a country built on an entire slave economy and not expect to be called racist for saying that. Now, I have said many racist things today on the podcast. I'll cop to those. But my criticisms of Qatar as a place, you know, that employs slavery, that's not racism. That's just fact.

And people talk a lot about modern slavery. This is only human one. This is old school. This is traditional slavery. Yes, it is. But actually, it's not for it. But here's the thing about it. I mean, full credit to the amazing job that Qatar has done

in convincing the entire world to hold its nose. And to simply ignore the obvious fact. Because you would ask most people, you'd think that most people, if it came up at a dinner party or something, or if their kid said, you know, Daddy, What's a slave, they would say that it was a bad thing to have slaves. And yet it's been so magnificently easy to simply ignore the reality of what's happened. Just at every single venue at this World Cup.

And pretty much every building in the entire of Qatar that's recent has been built by slaves, by actual slaves. The one thing that I find really fascinating about all of this is in the end, the World Cup would finish. Some team will win for kicking a ball better than. and another team and then we don't move on into whatever next fucking disaster um you know FIFA decides to give it to next two like Russia or whoever and um this is now just being normalized but at least people get to watch a ball being kicked around I don't get it I don't understand it at all I'm not a sports person I didn't even care about the the T20 World Cup I definitely would not care about it I have to correct you Sammy um most of us will will move on six and a half

thousand of us will never move again. That is very true. Well, given that Australia lost this morning 4-1 to France and our chances of getting into a cup are extremely limited, are extremely limited, I'm happy to go with you. I, you know, forget Qatar

unless we somehow win, in which case, you know what? Those Qataris, they do think we don't conventionally, Sammy, but they get results. Their methods may be unusual. Yeah, that's what's going to happen. If the soccer rules end up making it in, a lot of people will question their commitment to the boycott. I know. I, however, will hold strong and hold power. And if anyone

was to join me in the boycott, come to my Twitter and watch me just rant every day against Qatari's. You're an amazing freedom fighter. I mean, thank you for joining us. Our gear is from ride. We're part of the ACAST creator network.