The Chaser Report - WAR STORIES: Chris Still Hates Cracked Pepper

Episode Date: January 5, 2022

This Summer The Chaser Report presents... WAR STORIES!Chris Taylor enters the studio to join our Summer Stunt Series to unpack why he thinks The Chaser's stunts were so successful in their day. Chris shares inside stories on how some of the crowd favourite stunts like "Cracked Pepper" came to be, and tells the story of his least favourite stunt recording. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Striving for mediocrity in a world of excellence, this is The Chaser Report. Welcome to another war stories. This is our summer stunt series here at The Chaser Report. Charles Firth, Dom Knight, with Chris Taylor for the very first time. Taylor, welcome. A very happy new year to you guys. And you can tell you we've all done time on Triple M, summer stunt series. I'm loving the alliteration there.

You've done your time in Austerio. You just need a sting behind that with a bit of sizzle. Slap of sunscreen, a bit of sausage sizzle or something that says summer as a bunnings ad. I can't believe we didn't get a sponsor like powered by bunnings. Yeah, and the best stunt gets $1,000 every hour. So, yeah, the idea is basically we're just gas bagging about the show we used to make because it's kind of weird when you look back at the detail of what we were able to get away with how impossible it would be to do it now.

And you did some great stunts and we'll talk about some sketches as well. We'll get into that. Just a sec. The Chaser Report Less News Less Often Yeah, well it's funny You're talking to possibly one of two members of the Chaser

Who was least comfortable with the stunts And not only uncomfortable doing them But also a bit uncomfortable About how much they came to define the show Because I think, you know You guys would know Andrew Hansen and I And probably you guys too You know, we always saw the show as a sketch show

I don't mean literally a sketch show like, you know, not the 9 o'clock news or, you know, the DGN or something, but a series of segments of which stunts were one component. But it became incredibly apparent, particularly amongst a younger audience, which the ABC was incredibly grateful to have, and we were incredibly grateful to have, that they were the things that were sort of catching a light. And in the very early days of YouTube, it was the stunts that were getting shared around. And so those of us that sat in the office in the sort of more traditional, sketch quarter and writing songs and silly sketches sort of i mean we were always allowed to get us

material through but we were very aware it was in the public's eyes at least mostly second fiddle to the to the sort of big michael more sort of sasha barren cohen style gotches in the street or candid camera well i think that was my other discomfort with it the more the the the chasers were and everything went on that you know having gone into the the show and love seeing at an end and just thought that was an amazing show where we created this entire universe and it was a really conceived show and it was it had a yeah it had a world as you say charles and then to sort of go from that into something that at times by about season two and season three was descending into prank show I I felt a bit uncomfortable because

there's sort of a comedy purist in you that knows it's lazier comedy. just to hassle people in the street rather than write a script. Well, wasn't it actually referred to, because I wasn't there towards the end, but didn't it become referred to as internally as the war on receptionists? Or was that as the public too? No, but it really did become into the, got to the point where can you take a silly prop and we're going to talk about a stunt called where can you take a horse, which came to define, yeah, the internal gag of the Chase's writing,

room was every stunt was there were only really two versions of a stunt so it's where can you take a and that's crack pepper as an example of that where can you take a pepper grinder and then the other version of is just doing something that every other sketch comedy show had already done before us but we did it in the real world yes so like i remember there's one it's not a particularly well-known one but andrew hanson did this parody of the bold and the beautiful and based on the observation that they always talk with their backs to each other in every scene and i'm sure fast-forward did a thousand sketches making that same observation. But the chaser did it in the real world.

And for some reason, that was an entirely new idea. And it was in a way, because people's responses were interesting. And often the joke. And I often take that particular piece. And as I said, it's not a memorable piece. And I'd be surprised if Andrew brings it to the table on this podcast series. But when I've sort of been asked to talk to, you know, uni students or writing groups, I often take it and ask them the question,

would this be as funny if it was just a sketch like in shot in control conditions with actors and stuff? And they all say no. They all genuinely believe the laughs in that piece. And like if life was a musical is the other classic one. They are just basically songs because they're said in the real world, no one really laughs at the lyrics or the bad choreography.

The laughter is in the cutaways of the public response to these us clowns like parading around. And so I guess the tension I always had towards the end of the show was, are we only getting laughs based on doing these things in public? And are we getting lazy as comedy writers? Because it's no longer based on the strength of the ideas of the script. It's purely about muckraking in public. I must say, I reckon part of the delight in seeing those stuff done publicly.

Because as you say, they're often just sketches. but done in front of them are but part of the delight is the courage does because there's just an extra added bonus of seeing of seeing these performers have to do things in front of when it's sort of scary and horrible and uncontrolled and so little tv actually has that sort of spontaneity built into it and that's a magical thing about it is i mean i love the stunts as well and the thing that there's something magical about actually doing something in the real world or in some cases appearing to and not really doing it in the real world, we'll get on to that. But it's like how we've improvised comedy, the fact that you know it's happening

in front of you just ratchets up the laugh meter somehow hugely. I don't know what it is, but there's a kind of an output. No, real is sort of arresting. There is a tension, as Charles said, between, oh, this is an unscripted moment. I guess it's partly right, quote, unquote, reality TV is in vogue at the moment. It's, there is something a little bit magical and undefinable about spontaneity in television, to the extent that any of it is genuinely spontaneous. But there are genuine moments.

And don't get me wrong, the stunts that sort of punched up and sort of had, you know, good targets like corporations and politicians, I think amongst the Chase's, you know, really great work that I think all of us are really proud of. It was those ones where it was just sort of dragging a silly prop around to a reception, or hassling poor people outside the back of the ABC building. We were so lazy, we couldn't even get in a cab to go to a suburb beyond Ultimo.

If any people who want to re-watch these episodes, you'll notice most of it shot in Chinatown because that's where the ABC's position. Yeah, we get credit for diversity. We got credit. We're just laziness. We were talking about that episode that we did with Chaz about this, which is I went to a lecture like several years later

and they went, oh, you know, this is one of the groundbreaking Australian. shows because it's so multicultural, they just show Asian after Asian. Five white guys. Five white guys on the couch. Well, I mean, I must admit, I actually almost wrestle with the opposite thinking that I think sometimes we knew, because confusion was always a very good response for some of these stunts. Like, you didn't want anybody to laugh.

I think we always felt if people were in on the joke, it wasn't as funny. So confusion was a desired response. And part of me does struggle with. the fact we, I don't think it was willful or premeditated, but part of the reason you do see a lot of migrants, for one of a better term, in a lot of our pieces is they just didn't, they didn't have English as a first language. They didn't really understand what we were saying to them. So, often their bafflement isn't bafflement at the comedy offer. It's bafflement genuinely at what we're even saying. What the hell is going on?

And I feel a bit uncomfortable about that. There are some slight, of hand in the editing, which I don't know if Chaz covered, but, you know, it's certainly not the first show on TV to, you know, use lots of hand in editing. But, but yeah, I'm very amused to hear some people thought it was progressive. It was mostly just laziness because the office was located in that suburb. I think now, having had this conversation, Chris, we should just stop. Look, they are fun to look back at. And I don't know, the thing about it for me is that, I mean, there was a lot of show to fill this is the thing there was such a massive amount in 22 minutes a

week doesn't sound like a lot but sketches take so long to do just a minute of scripting and set up and props and costume and all kind of stuff so the stunts were much easier in the sense that you could build something and get a couple of solid minutes out of it and that's part of why i guess we kept powering them out oh absolutely they yeah they i did enjoy some of yours uh there was some that I think only you could have done, despite your discomfort. I mean, the crack pepper one was possibly the most famous thing in the entire series. And it's just something about the way you deliver that line that makes it funny. I don't know what it is.

I was up all night learning my lines. It's the pompous yet intrusive tone. Yeah, and it's very hard to explain why that piece is popular. I mean, can you remember the line? Salt? No, no. I mean, that was based on a very simple and probably not particularly original observation that back then you don't tend to get it as much these days. I think you killed it.

Do you think I had influence and scared every waiter? But back in the, when do we make the show early mid-noughties, mid-and I guess even in the 90s, anyone who was around then and dined in restaurants. Waiters did always come, regardless of cuisine. for your dessert and with a giant pepper grinder and off of you crack pepper and it was I can't even remember the premise was

imagine if they did that in places other than restaurant I mean it's not even a comic premise it's sort of surrealism if that's not too pretentious it's sort of taking something out of context so it's taking a prop that we know from restaurants and taking it to pools

and basketball courts and churches and just on the assumption that everyone everywhere might want crack pepper or want it as little as people in restaurants wanted and I think that was it. The Chaser Report, news you know you can't trust. But the first clip I brought in is entirely the same premise, I think most of mine were.

But instead of a pepper grinder, it was where can you take a horse? Yes. Is it outside? You mean outside? No, I prefer it. It's raining, so can we eat it? No.

You can't bring a horse in, sign? No. How are you right to bring the horse in? Excuse me? You don't like let horses in the shopping centre? Well, that's just horses. Move, please. It's not so big.

It doesn't he got no one in the bus? I try to get one on the bus. Hey, Dan. It's here to see Pirates to the Caribbean. We took one to the movies. Movies. It's the Greater Union on George Park. I just need to get alone. If we speak to anyone about loan, Rocky's keen to get a new stable. The horse was called Rocky and we took him to Sir George Bank.

He took him into a record shop. Yeah? Then a bottle shot. Rocky. Sorry. He's got a drinking problem. He's got a drinking problem. It's the bottle shot.

I mean, again, speaking to our laziness, this was all done within 500 metres of the ABC officers around Ultimo and camped out. Rocky, not Rocky. Rocky, you're in a bar now, you'll be hay. Do you have any, like, hay or any horse food or something? All right. Sorry about this. He just, he hasn't eaten for a while. Okay.

Well, get Rocky out. Well, get Rocky out of fit. Next time, maybe. I'll come back with the Sheple's ponies. Thank God, because you always need an out for these pieces. It's just been, the horses was actually disappointingly well behaved in most of the shops, but finally we got him into a sort of a convenience store, a grocery shop, where he started, like, just messing all the items off the shelves,

and we got a suppling of an out. Look, it was fun. I actually genuinely like horses. And from memory, we always tried to create a loose premise. for these. And Craig often made fun of me that, you know, I used to read, you know, like pompous magazines like Harpers from New York. And they always had, it was basically highbrow odd spot, you know, like all their first sort of the section, front section of like the Harpers index. We're always just sort of very niche stats about things that often did actually

create a germ of an idea. And this was based on an idea that pet owners were generally campaigned in America for greater sort of greater human privileges for their pets but of course they were just talking about

dogs and cats and I thought well what if you own a horse why can't you take it to the movies with you so I think that was sort of the the slender premise

the reason I brought this one to the table I guess it's not only emblematic of the sort of where can you take a genre but it's the most heart in mouth

shoot I've ever done I still have nightmares about an aspect of that shoot that is not in the final edit because it was just so horrendous. I can't remember this. What happened? Well, Charles, you probably weren't around for me and we would have kept you in the dark. Dom, I'll jog your memory because it was so sad.

One of the places, well, you be the judge, one of the places we took Rocky the horse was Sydney's oldest church, which is on Broadway, it's a slither of a thing, sort of sandwich between two youth hostels or something, but there's this gorgeous Sansone church. Just quite near central. Near Central, I think Edmund Blackett was the architect. Is this Christchurch St Lawrence? Yes, thank you.

We've got a theologian on the podcast. I didn't know the name of the church, but he was, we took Rocky Inn there, and it was just not good. Like, his who, it was all, there was, it was very shiny marble tiles. And none of us on the shoot put two and two together, realizing that that wouldn't be a good surface for a horse. He'd been so excellent all day. Like we'd given him, you know, he'd been in banks, he'd been in cinemas,

he'd been in bottle shops. He was pissed probably by this time of this stage of the shoot. But I think we just got overconfident that he was a very well, trained horse and could handle anything. But the minute we got him into this church aisle, made of marble, and there was no carpet down, it was just pure, very expensive marble, probably laid by convicts. It was the original Sydney church, and he was slipping everywhere. The horse starts to do the splits.

Like, in that kind of way that you think, shit, have we got a post-Melban Cup situation? Yeah, where's the green curtain? Where's the rifle? And it was, oh, it was, it was like, time just stopped as the horse cannot get traction on this, on these tiles. He's just slipping terribly. And we had a first AD who was on that shoot. And normally on these shoots, we had very lean crews. It was just normally the cameraman and the chaser.

But because I guess we were wrangling a big horse. We had no animal trainer, but we did have a first AD called Rod Oliver, who's worked with us for years. He's a lovely, lovely guy and very capable. Not a horse whisperer, though. But sort of reads the situation and works out that reversing the horse is probably our best. Like, the more he went forwards, the more he just slipped. Yeah, yeah.

And I can't describe it more than other than doing. Yeah, no. We've all seen the kind of displayed thing. Yeah, it's displayed. It happens in cartoons, but in reality that's that. It's that. They break their legs, so you've got to put them down, right? That's the stakes for the horse.

all we're thinking and all we're seeing in our head. But Rod somehow, I just, we didn't even maneuver the horse, you know, with our hands or anything. We just sort of stopped its passage going forward and encouraged it to go backwards and thank God somehow reversing was less slippery for the horse. But in the process of reversing out of this incredibly old, incredibly precious church, he completely damaged all these tiles, all these marble stones. God.

And so we're now thinking, okay, we've saved the horse, we hope, but we've suddenly got a very serious situation in terms of... The day the chaser desecrated a church. It was always going to happen at some point. And of course, you know, like all these stunts, we hadn't asked permission to be in the church. I'd just gone into the church. And I think Christianity, possibly not to their credit,

has an open door policy. Yeah, they offer salvation to all. And we will provide shelter. They might have rethought that since the chases started taking animals in there. But, I mean, serious damage. There were, like, cracks, and they were splitting and uprooting these tiles. And all we're thinking is how expensive is this going to be to we pay? Like, we totally owned it, and we make sure we found the parishioner,

or not the parishioner, the priest or whoever lives in the church. So when we came to put the piece together, it was always a real bittersweet one for me because I enjoyed my day with Rusty. And it is a cute kind of piece about, you know, a bloke taking his horse around the city. But all I could think of was, oh, A, we almost killed the whores. And B, I've probably cost taxpayers through the ABC. A fortune.

No one ever told me the bill. It was all kept a bit hush-hush. We did pay for it. And I think the church was even quite sweet about it. Like, I mean, not so strong. weird is to say don't worry about it, but kind of a mate trade or something. It wasn't like I don't know why.

But I think if you run a church these days anybody coming in who doesn't normally go there is a Christmas miracle. Right. Maybe that was the deal. They go, well, meet you halfway on the damage bill. If you come every next Sunday for the next two years. Yeah, so it was sort of an example

of a lot of these. I mean, some of the, I always say about these chases stunts, the ones that look dangerous generally weren't. and the ones that look benign and quite cuddly had horrific things. I remember Chaz doing one. I don't know if you spoke about it.

It was a very soft piece. I don't mean comedically soft, but it was not an in-your-face piece about pokies in pubs. And our idea was, well, why should you only have pokies next to live musicians in pubs? Pokies should be next to live musicians everywhere.

So Q, Chaser, bringing pokies next to buskers all around. all around the city streets and, you know, a very soft sort of offer was playful with buskers but one of them, this is the Chaz piece one of them just took it badly

and threatened Chaz with a knife or something. Yeah, that's right. He said, and the kicker was, Chaz explained who he was and the guy went, oh, I know who you are. Oh, so he had cause. No, Chaz, no, Jazz went, I'm candid camera, I'm candid camera. Yeah, and he went,

No, your chair's from the chaser. I know who you are and I'm going to kill you. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. But that's the one I always cite with, you know, something you'd think you wouldn't need any security for it all. It's a friendly offer. It's basically saying, you know, we support you and the fact that you've been chucked out of pubs because poker's ever placed you.

It was a pro musician offer. But yeah, so similarly with Rusty, not Rusty, Rocky, sorry. I'm so disrespectful. I can't even remember the horse I nearly killed his name. Are you sure he didn't kill Rocky and have to bring in Rusty to complete the shot? But look, Rocky was fine. But yeah, the church wasn't. And so it's probably the better result.

Of the two, if you had to fuck up one, I think we'd all agree we'd rather fuck up some old marble tiles than a horse. I like to think the Holy Spirit saved that. They probably had insurance for if a horse walks into your church and breaks your tiles. Yes, also, I mean, Edmund Black, it's the one to blame. Surely in that day and age you would have had a horse-proof church. Yeah. Come on, Edmund.

At least donkey-proof. How many nativity reenactments were that church have done every Christmas, recreating Mary and Joseph's journey to Bethlehem? Surely they designed tiles that could withstand horseshoes and donkey shoes. I don't know, I sort of, I haven't seen it for a long time since just then. It just feels gentle to me. But I seem to recall... Oh, he got a huge resource.

Yeah, it's just the notion of having a horse where a horse shouldn't be. Because, I mean, Andrew Denton always was in favour of the big prop. The first time we met him, it was one of the early days we met Denton was actually going to a pub where he was launching his Sydney Olympic props, which were like, there was a giant syringe and, I can't know what they all were, but it's just basically these very expensive giant doping props that Triple M had paid for. And that was his style, and he trained us to the bigger the better, and a horse is. It's a very big prop, Chris. Horse is big, and I guess the change up, if there was any evolution to be charted here,

was that the prop was alive rather than a foam object. I was also wondering, Chris, did you get that idea from, you know how in university days there are all these weird regulations people who just talk about? And like, if you took a horse to an exam, the university had to provide stabling and straw and stuff. And if you went to certain bridges, the government had to provide, I know, a bowl of water or oats. or something. There are all these old horse laws that still are in the books?

Is that where this came from? No, it did. As I said, it was more just something I'd read about general increased rights for pets and increased access for pets. And I think my exaggeration was just to treat a horse as a pet, which it would be for many rural people. Not so much urban people.

But your right time, yeah, there are laws about, you know, if you have a horse in Michigan, you've got to pull over in a car or something. No, but also you've got to give it water. I think that's, isn't that true? Yeah, there's all these weird ones in London. I remember reading them out on radio once, these absurd old horse laws. If you turn up in a pub with a horse, they have to give the horse water or something.

Right, milk or something. Yeah, there's all these things. Andrew Hansen, Andrew Hansen had a theory that, and still does, that I'm obsessed with horses. And I must admit, of all the animals, I do find there is something comical about horses. And you'll often notice there are a lot of horses in a lot of the stuff I wrote, not always live horses. Although there were plenty of those. And the poor production team was always, it was like, they often called me like referred to me as Noah

because there was always a different pair of animals I was wanting to bring into the show each week. Which animal has Chris not recently almost killed in a shoot? Yeah. Well, I think we've learned something in this episode. Do not bring your horse to church. Thanks very much, Chris. We'll catch you next time here on the summer edition of the Chaser Report.

Our gear is from Road microphones, and we are part of the ACAS creator network. And we're doing one of these every day in January. See ya.