The Chaser Report - What Was Charles Like 25 Years Ago? | Craig Reucassel

Episode Date: September 16, 2021

Gabbi goes back in time to find out what The Chaser team were like 25 years ago, by reviewing the 1996 documentary ‘Uni’. What was university like in the 90's? How did The Chaser come to be? And was Charles always the way he is? Answer all these questions and more in today’s episode. Plus Bec brings you all the latest Chaser news you can’t trust. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This episode of The Chaser Report is brought to you by the crushed dreams of getting fit while in lockdown. You really thought it would happen, didn't you? You idiot. Striving for mediocrity in a world of excellence, this is The Chaser Report. Hello and welcome to The Chaser Report for Friday the 17th of September 2021, Gabby Bolt, Charles Firth and Dom Knight, or as I like to call us, the Forever Partnership of hosting this podcast. Does that mean my internships over and I've been hired? No, it means you're forever an intern.

It's a forever internship. Gabby? Yeah, yay. I presume you're referring to the US, UK, Australia partnership. No, no, or is I like to pronounce it, orcs? Orcs, yeah, it's totally orcs, isn't it? But I sort of thought the point about strategic partnerships is to, to not just rely on the people who you have already relied on,

but create new partnerships that then broaden your... You mean to not be taken for granted forever by the United States? Is that what you're saying? Yeah, yeah. That's not a possible. We're forever being taken for granted. But we are getting nuclear submarines. That is the big sweetener for us,

is that we now are going to be a nuclear nation at last. Rather than just digging the stuff up, we're actually going to use it to drive our submarines. So let's just go through the history of building submarines in this country. When we were growing up, Gabby Yes, so 1810 Yeah, there was this submarine called the Collins class submarine

It was steam powered I swear this is true One of the big problems with the Collins class submarine Is that it couldn't turn left Yes It was a very right-wing submarine Much like a big problem with your generation too actually Every time it wanted to turn left

It had to turn right It was a complete disaster But then we had to differentiate ones, Charles. No, no, no, Dom. Ah, Lesaborin. Remember we had the Japanese. Were they Japanese ones?

Yeah, we gave a contract to the Japanese. Remember? That's historically quite ironic, but anyway. And then I think the problem with that is that they couldn't float or something? What was the problem with them? Well, hold on, no, a submarine's not supposed to float. Well, that's what the Japanese told us, but we didn't believe them. It's supposed to submerge.

That's the sub in submarine. It's not called a float marine. Well, I think the Collins class, we never actually put them underwater because we were too worried they'd leak. Oh, okay. So the French ones, though, 90 billion dollar deal. Yeah. And we've pulled out, we've cancelled it, which is going to really piss off front. I mean, somehow wasted two and a half billion just on the way, just by canceling.

But in fairness, Dom, don't you think it's funny when French people get angry? Like, ah, mad! I think that's worth two and a half billion dollars. My theory is we just have to drink 88 billion dollars. worth of champagne to keep the friendship sweet. I'm willing to do my bit. Yes. So as a result, we now have a much tighter and closer partnership with the United States

and with the UK, so tight that the president, well, maybe it's not that tight. Thank you, Boris. And I want to thank that fellow down under. Thank you very much, pal. Appreciate it, Mr. Prime Minister. I mean, people have been pointing to this as dementia. I see it as success that Joe Biden did not want to remember. Scott Morrison's name.

I think he's been trying to forget that. years. As have we. On today's show, we've got a very special edition looking back at the history of one Charles Henry Bergman Firth, who very fortunately in the year 1996, allowed a camera crew to follow him around for a portrait of a quintessential uni student. He's not going to look good, is he, Gabby? I don't know.

I think I'll leave that up to the listener. Yeah, I don't think you should listen to this today's episode. Just turn off now. Yeah, we don't need your listens. What's that thing you always say, modesty is death? Come on now. Stop it. Go away.

Everyone go away. Before we do that in a moment, we're going to head to Rebecca Day and Amuno in the Chastin Newsroom. Scott Morrison's PR team has had a recent breakthrough after signing a deal with the US and UK to produce Australia's first fleet of nuclear submarines. Following the backlash the Prime Minister received

when the public found out he fled to Hawaii, these high-tech submarines will make sure the Prime Minister can remain completely undetectable during a crisis. Channel 10 has caused controversy with their latest marketing stunt to promote their hit show The Masked Singer. It was revealed that the broadcaster completely staged Christian Porter's trial in an attempt to drum up enthusiasm for next season where they unmasked the blind trust.

Billionaires Jeff Bezos and Richard Branson have come under fierce criticism for wasting vital resources on joyrides in space, exacerbating a climate catastrophe. Heelon Musk has decided to challenge what was seen as a selfish and reckless endeavour by sending four regular people into space instead. The CEO plans to launch another 1,918,500,000 of these flights in his quest to make space travel accessible to non-billionaires. That's the latest Chaser News you can't trust. I'm Rebecca Dayunamuno.

This episode of The Chaser Report is brought to you by the crushed dream of reading a single novel while in lockdown. Get real. You're not going to read the novel. These days you can hardly bring yourself to read Facebook, you idiot. Now we've asked Craig to sit in on this journey back to 1996 because he was in the room when a lot of these scenes were actually filmed. Over to you, Gabby. I have a secret to share with everybody here. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I found a really interesting documentary series recently. Yeah, I know. I just thought I'd really try and educate myself on a time that I wasn't really a part of. I was a baby at the time.

And it's a really interesting expose into university life in the 90s, yeah. Oh, no. Oh, no. This wouldn't be called the uni documentary by any chance, would it? It sure is, Craig. Yes, the series, you didn't hear this from me, everybody,

but the series is called uni. It's by Simon Target, and the whole thing is on YouTube, all four episodes. Now, I think you'll find it's Simon Tartier. He'd be very upset if you said Target. It's all on YouTube. It is. it's exciting, isn't it?

Yeah, yeah, particularly because one of the main studies in the docu-series is Charles. We're not doing this. We're not doing this segment. Oh, but we are Charles. It's a documentary about the youthful hubris of Charles Firth, and I'm here for it. Can I suggest that if you had any shame that that documentary series would not be there in the first place? So I think it's a little late to bring out shame now. But it was so unfairly edited, guys.

Can we just have that as a caveat beforehand? This was not like a true depiction of reality. This was an edited version where they created these caricatures which there were no relationship to who I was as a person. Well, if you didn't like how they edited it, Charles, you're not going to like how I've edited this. So not only did it start, Charles, it also starred a lot of the Chaser alumni and alumni to be as well,

which I'll go through in a sec. But the first thing I learnt is that Charles, as we know him today, has not changed one bit since. 1996. I'm going to go and try and scam an extension from my lecturer, except, like, you're supposed to get extensions before your hand in the essay, but one of mine's been three weeks late, and then the other one, I haven't done it. Look, here's the thing.

I can forgive missing a uni assignment or two. We've all been there. However, I'm not sure I approve of this blatant use of white straight male privilege. I'm going to use the line that I've been a bit incompetent and I didn't realize when it was due, and then I'll just go from that and also say it was really busy. and then, because he knows my dead. Oh, right? Ah, no.

Got to give away. Yeah, the incompetence line would still work. It's good, yeah. And also, I will say it's kind of incredible that your voice hasn't changed at all. Yeah. You sound exactly the same. I'll re-dub the union document.

And it's worth bearing in mind there was actually a camera pointed at him and he still had no shame and shared everything. So that hasn't changed either. But you know what, Charles, it's nice to know that you've always been super ambitious. The Arts Review this year has the potential to be absolutely brilliant.

There's a lot of work involved in everything, but we have enough talented people to make it one of the best reviews that's been seen. You know, in Australia, I mean, it could be a renaissance of culture, like, you know, and a real sort of opportunity, like at Melbourne University of the Dgeneration or at Cambridge or Oxford, I think, like, there is that potential there. Yeah, for reference to those of you who might not know, Charles is actually talking about the Sydney University Arts Review. A Function I have researched to find out that most patrons attend drunk, high, and ready to heckle.

So, you know, height of class. Gabby, you've done the research. You've looked back and I can't quite remember. Did it turn out to be one of the greatest productions of all time? I just couldn't quite remember. Yeah, no, it was. No, it absolutely is an Oscar-worthy stage production. By that, I mean, it would never qualify.

If you wanted to know, guys, it was called SciCow. SciCow Phantom of the Ebertoir. Good to know, you still know it, Charles. I remember watching that review in the audience, and that was not my impression. But the surprising thing is that a lot of people involved in that production did go on to professional careers in comedy, and I was not predicting that after watching it. No, no, that's true. That was one of my great regrets because I was involved in that, and it was going to be

this political satire, like Bob Robert's style was the idea, right? And then I went away for the weekend, and I came back, and it's like, oh, it's called Sikow now, and it's about a cow. And I was like, what happened? He was like, oh, you didn't see it. But on Saturday night, Andrew Hansen did a really funny impersonation of a cow. It's like, how the fuck? What the fuck happened?

And Craig, I'll completely concur with that because I will say a few things during this made me question Charles's professionalism. Charles has made himself director of the review. The cast have all gone to a beach house for a weekend of brainstorming. So I've actually spoken to a few attendees of this workshop break that you speak of. And by all accounts, they have said that this beach trip was literally. literally just a reason to have a complete bender. But it is nice to know that Andrew Hansen actually was doing some work, as well as weirdly prophesizing what the Chase's whole brand ended up becoming.

Through the tiresome work of 12 scriptwriters, 31 professional actors, 48 executive producers, 430 lighting rigors and over 12,000 pre-Socratic philosophers. We bring you a performance of such unparalleled mediocrity that you simply will not know into love. But I suppose, you know, without the internet, you have to create your own fun, which Charles did actually do by jokingly campaigning for his mate

Sholto to win the student SRC vote that year and who better to campaign for him than Logie disgrace himself, 20-ish-year-old Tom Gleason. Could I have your attention, please? Picture yourself just over a week from today. Sholto McPherson who loses the election?

I want a week, President. It's not fair. Look at this display! But now, picture yourself just over a week from today. Sholto McPherson wins Strong campaign How did that go I ever win a gold loggie

For anybody? I watch this whole thing Charles and I got to say I have no clue What one single policy Of Sholto's campaign was going to be I don't think anyone did No it was running on a personality ticket

It wasn't about policies Okay Very modern Childo always had the best parties That's all that there was to it That was the campaign So you would say that you weren't overly invested Charles You were like oh this would be fun

kind of thing Is that what you're saying? I think I know where this is going to. Let's go. We can find out. We can find out. Oh, man, it's nothing. It's such a disappointment.

Charles, you ran him first. It's a joke. You thought to be funny if he won't. It wouldn't be funny if he won't, but he's not going to win because of course he's not going to win. Nobody ever thought he was going to win. For those of you who don't know, that was Charles genuinely sobbing at the university bar when he lost. Yeah. I still remember.

Andrew, one of the words that Andrew said that night to comfort me was a soggy cup of chips could have run the, could have run the AC better than shoulder. There was just like such a childhood naivity about the whole thing because what I got from watching just that one episode about this whole political part was like everyone around you was like, oh, this will be funny. And you seem to be like, no, we're going to win and it's good and we're handing out flyers and nobody else knows what they're talking about because we're going to win it. And so I was a little bit, I genuinely was a little bit heartbroken for you watching that

movie. He is a figure of great pathos in that he's quite pathetic, yeah. The Chaser Report, now with extra whispers. What was your takeaway? I remember when this went to air, and, you know, when I go back to my hometown and people who'd watched it, they'd say, oh, that Charles guy is such a fuck witch. And I'd spend a lot of time kind of going, no, no, no, he's actually really good. I know it came across that way, but he's actually really lovely guy.

What was your takeaway from that particular film? I just took, I kind of viewed it the same way I would view, like, a younger sibling. I walked away kind of thinking, oh, this guy just doesn't know how life works yet. I do want to be fair. I want to be fair to Charles, though. I think I'd prefer to be known as a fuck wit. Craig said he wanted for there to be like a Bob Robert style satire of politics and all that. And that was Charles's life.

It wasn't just Charles further as undergrad. Great work, Charles. none of your best characters yet. In matters of the heart, though, this is like some of the most interesting content to me because it's honestly crazy to think that all of you grew up to have partners and kids of your own, given this evidence.

See, this is a terrible thing. Like, I'm not someone who's confident enough to just go up and kiss. Hopefully, what will happen is she will do all the work. Good. Man, I'm just awful. Why did I ever let myself? It's the best.

I had so much fun. But, you know, when things didn't quite go the way obviously you had hoped, Charles, in the way of your love life, the besty little drunken gossip session between you and Andrew Hansen was one of my favourite things to watch in the entire series. What you should do is go out with one of those people who like you. No, no, no, I don't want to go out with someone who likes me.

I know you don't. Finally, the first person you go out with doesn't like you. He's perfect for me. Maybe I'll bow this one. We really likes me. We'll go out with Rebecca. Wouldn't that be amazing? You're so good and he's so right.

I just don't feel like the same attachment to Rebecca as I did. So who's Rebecca? Oh, we know. Yeah, so do I. Do you know why? Why? Because I ran into her and I asked her if she had anything particularly juicy from that whole series. And she said, you know, when they say, oh, maybe I should go out with Rebecca and I was like, no way.

Oh, my God. So it's good to know that, you know, you didn't quite feel the attachment to Rebecca, you know, which she doesn't read the headlines on this podcast and hasn't worked with you on several television shows or anything. Oh, there you go. Man. God, I hope she doesn't listen to this. Is it very enjoyable watching Charles be forced to re-listen to that? It's great.

Gabby, can we do this for like the next few weeks? There's a lot in the series. There is a lot. There is a lot. And I didn't really know what to cover because there is so much. But I will take the heat off Charles a little bit. Oh, good. The way it ended, though,

I've got to say, it left me quite sad. And it's not because I can see every day on this podcast now the real time of reality of aging, but rather the reality of just how much things have changed in my lifetime. Because I was born in 1996 when this was filmed, by the way. Oh, my God. So there you go. I am a direct result of how much time has changed.

But, yeah, I figured out things are a lot different now. Students and teachers are marshalling forces against a new government that wants to cut funding to universities and make students pay more for their courses. Yeah, that would never have now. No, you couldn't do it. If universities protested every single time cuts were made, there'd be a protest every week.

But also, protests don't feel like this anymore. There were kids being thrown by police, kids storming cop cars, and there were kids trying to throw punches at John Howard. On this footage, like I was watching a mutiny take place. It was amazing, and you couldn't do it now. You know the really sad thing, Gabby, is that those students were protesting against

fees of $1,200 a semester. Oh, I know, and it's funny you mention that, because the thing that made me saddest was the so-called happy ending of the series. The pay to speak dragged on long after students left campus for the holidays. Maybe it was Christmas spirit, but in the end, Sydney Uni found the money to offer its academic staff a 12% pay increase. This they accepted and finally released the student's exam results. Imagine being able to tell you guys back then

that the average student debt in 1996 was $12,759, compared to 2020 with $23,280. That's an almost doubling of the debt, and yet the student average yearly income is now only one grand more per annum than it was in 1996. My God, I'd hate to be young. The interesting thing about that is that I hadn't realized that the link there is that we were protesting,

but that if we won, they were going to release our exam marks. I wouldn't be protesting at all. That was a real... That was our own, owning ourselves. Yeah. I mean, if only the students had known Charles's dad, it might have all been fine. I digress. It was actually a lot of fun.

It was an amazing watch. And also rather comforting to know that life will end up completely fine. And the university experience is definitely still as fun and freeing as it was in the 90s and that there's absolutely nothing wrong. And nothing is getting worse. Not the climate. Not the government. Not the economy.

Everything is totally righteous, man, as they'd say in 1996. The really good news. is that, you know, after sacking 40,000 university workers, there presumably won't be any uni's left, which means there won't be any documentaries like this ever made again. Perfect. This episode is brought to you by the crushed dream of maintaining a minimum acceptable level of hygiene while in lockdown.

Nothing matters anymore. You don't need clean teeth, you idiot. Before we go, as we do every Friday, let's take a look at the podcast reviews. These are the things that you've written on Apple. podcast, and there's heaps of them, and some of them are really long-winded and complimentary, so they're not interesting. Let's start with the one from Peter J.H.

who says, legally funny than friendly Jordy's five stars, love the show, although didn't need to know about Alex's penis. Embarrassed face. Fair. Fair. That's what my face looked like as well after that discussion. I have this one from Uniterra, where it says, the podcast of Comrade Snowball, five stars, the best place to hear the worst news.

So, I mean, that's pretty much right on the money That's a slogan we should totally steal And the rest of it's a long analogy about animal farm That I don't really understand This one's from the big Johnny D That name sounds familiar Wait, hold on Which is John Domenico's

One of our writers Wait, we're allowed to write our own reviews Isn't that kind of ringing the game a bit? Well, it says big fan of the podcast Well, that's lucky I love the podcast I listen every day while I poop And some times even when I'm not pooping

Well, there you go. What an endorsement that is. It's very long and very complimentary of the interns. Sincerely an unbiased fan. I do have one gripe, though, as much as the old guys are funny, they are also old and old. I mean, that's true. Thanks, John. Thanks, ageist employee.

And my favourite, though, is from my big ears, five stars. This is a podcast. And the review is, The Chaser is indeed one of the numerous podcasts available. And on that note, can't deny that. Let's call it, shall we? Please write more reviews next week on Apple Podcasts. Charles is off on a holiday. I'm from Tuesday, aren't you?

Yes, I'm going away so that I didn't have to work with you guys. Hold on, going away. We're in a pandemic, Charles. This is a lie. You just want a break from us. I'm going to my bedroom and I'm going to lie there all week. Our gears from road microphones, we're part of the Acast, Creator Network. Catch you on Monday.

See you then. Thank you.