The Chris Voss Show - The Chris Voss Show Podcast – Cass Morrow, Relationship Coach, Disrupting Divorce & Flipping Statistics With The “NEW” Marriage

Episode Date: November 24, 2023

Cass Morrow, Relationship Coach, Disrupting Divorce & Flipping Statistics With The “NEW” Marriage Morrowmarriage.com Show Notes About The Guest(s): ​ Cass Morrow is a relationship coach who, along with his wife, helps couples disrupt divorce and create a new kind of marriage. With a background in therapy and personal development, Cass has worked with over 3,100 men in the first 20 months of his business. He is passionate about helping men and women understand their roles in relationships and create a strong foundation for a successful marriage. ​ Summary: ​ Cass Morrow joins Chris Voss on The Chris Voss Show to discuss how he and his wife help couples create a new kind of marriage and disrupt divorce. Cass shares his personal journey of overcoming a toxic relationship and transforming himself into a better partner. He explains the importance of understanding masculine and feminine dynamics in a relationship and how men can step into their leadership role. Cass also addresses the concept of the "nice guy" and why it is important for men to be authentic and true to themselves. He provides practical tips for men to improve their relationships and create a strong foundation for a successful marriage. ​ Key Takeaways: ​ - Understanding masculine and feminine dynamics is crucial for a successful marriage. - Men need to step into their leadership role and provide a safe and secure environment for their partners. - The "nice guy" syndrome is counterproductive and can lead to resentment and dissatisfaction in a relationship. - Emotional validation and communication are essential for building trust and connection. - Men should focus on personal growth and self-improvement to become the best version of themselves. ​ Quotes: ​ - "If you lose your wife's respect, it's near impossible to get it back." - Cass Morrow - "Women want a guy who's a killer, who's going to kill it in business and protect her." - Cass Morrow - "Nice guys are fake and lack self-value and purpose." - Cass Morrow - "Leadership is about providing structure and direction, not control." - Cass Morrow - "Men need to be stoic and provide emotional stability in a relationship." - Cass Morrow

You wanted the best. You've got the best podcast, the hottest podcast in the world. The Chris Voss Show, the preeminent podcast with guests so smart you may experience serious brain bleed. The CEOs, authors, thought leaders, visionaries, and motivators. Get ready, get ready, strap yourself in. Keep your hands, arms, and legs inside the vehicle at all times because you're about to go on a monster education roller coaster with your brain. Now, here's your host, Chris Voss. I'm Oaks Voss here from thechrisvossshow.com. Thechrisvossshow.com.

There you go, folks. Welcome to the big show. We certainly appreciate you guys coming by. Thanks for being a part of the show. We really appreciate it. As always, we've been bringing the smartest people in the world to come share with you their ideas, their thoughts, the things they spent a lifetime developing, learning, acquiring,

going through all the mistakes, and bringing you the essence of what they do. For 15 years, we've been bringing you the CEOs, the billionaires, the White House presidential advisors, governors, congressmen, U.S. ambassadors, astronauts, and if that's not enough, Pulitzer Prize-winning journalists and all the elite journalists around the world. And we distill that down into this beautiful thing that we give you called the Chris Voss Show Glow.

So when you listen to the Chris Foss Show, you get this glow that washes over you. And when you walk around your day-to-day life, there's just this so much bullshit I'm full of. And that too. But you also get this wonderful glow. And people go up to you and they go, my God, your intelligence just shines off of your skull. Where do you get that from? You go, I listen to the Chris Voss Show podcast. So refer the show to your family, friends, or relatives.

Go to goodreads.com for it says Chris Voss. LinkedIn.com for it says Chris Voss. Subscribe to that big LinkedIn newsletter. Girls that go weed every day. I'm on there. I'm like, how are this many people active on LinkedIn? Go to our 130,000 LinkedIn group over there. Chris Voss 1 on the ticketyickety Talkety where the kids play.

And also Chris Foss Facebook if you want to hang out and talk to the show. There's a show page over there and a message thing where you can sit around and, I don't know, shoot the shit with me. And there's no Snapchat. We're not having that, folks. Anyway, guys, it's not that kind of show. You've got to have OnlyFans for that. I think there's a Chris Foss

show, OnlyFans or something. I don't know. but you have to pay extra for it anyways we had an amazing young man on the show we're gonna be talking to him about how he helps married couples and all that good stuff cas morrow's on the show with us today he's him both him and his wife are coaches who helped disrupt divorce and flipping statistics with what they call the new marriage. I'm still trying to figure out the old marriage. So there's a new marriage now. I can't keep up with this stuff, people. I'm still saving up for my first divorce. I'm about 3 million ready. And I think about two more million, I'll be ready to go. So we're going to be talking to him about how he has changed his life, his relationship, saved his relationship, and how you can do it as well.

Cas Moro is a managing, self-aware, aspiring gentleman who's inspiring the world and disrupting divorce, flipping statistics with what he calls the new marriage. I hope this doesn't involve a certificate from the state. Welcome to Showcast. How are you? I am having the best day of my life. Thanks for having me on, Chris. The best day of your life.

There you go. So give us your dot coms. Where do you want people to find you on the interwebs? First, you go to moralmarriage.com and or moralmarriage anywhere. My podcast or the social media is all moralmarriage. There you go. And let's spell that for people so they can get that on the audio. Yeah.

M-O-R-R-O-W. M-O-R-R-O-W. Kind of like tomorrow and without the two at the beginning, huh? Exactly. Yeah. There you go. Works well for marriage since we're all two. There you go.

That's good to have because it's not really a marriage. There's just one of you. Yeah. That's funny. That's what the judge told me. And you also have a pretty good thriving TikTok looks like coming along. It's actually okay. It's not the biggest one for me, but it's,

it just kind of goes up and down ebbs and flows. Yeah. Yeah. It's kind of the way TikTok works. It's, you know, if you're not making kids stuff and dancing and I don't know, doing that MCP, PC, whatever thing they're doing nowadays, it's tough to compete with the kids. So give us a 30,000 overview of what you and your wife do and how you guys do it. Yeah, pretty straightforward. We run programs. I run one for men. She runs one for women. And the idea is what could you do? We don't really care what your partner says. I don't care what your partner does. How do you want to show up? My wife would teach the same thing. So yeah, it's a pretty unique process because everybody's told it takes two, but almost everybody that comes to us is the one that's in and wants to save the marriage. There you go. You know, I, I, years ago I was breaking up with a girlfriend.

I remember, and I, an offer to go to counseling is the last ditch effort. And she said, no, I don't want to go to counseling. And I was like, why not? She goes, because I know what the counselor is going to say. He's going to say, it's all me. You know, I'll tell you something about that, Chris, that drives me mental. And that is that, you know, almost everybody who says they want to save their marriage or I'm working on it, I'm fixing things. They say what they're supposed to say. Yeah. I'm going to counseling. That doesn't mean you're actually in. That's true. That's true. That's what I, you know, been doing in AA for the past 50 years. I just go there and take a bag and drink. No, I'm just kidding. Don't do that. That's a joke.

That's a joke. The, so I believe you have one sort of program you call your, the marriage reset, and she has the white picket fence project. Is that my reading that right off the website? Yes, that's correct yeah there you go and then so you guys have a podcast as well do we get a plug-in for that yeah we can it's moral marriage search it and it's or the youtube moral marriage slash podcasts and we we do we just started the podcast and what we're doing is we're sharing our story you know when people hear about all the emotional physical sexual abuse the restraining order, the probation for a year, and you hear the lessons along the way, then it starts to really get them fired up and start to realize what's possible because they see us interacting. There you go.

And you see you guys still like each other. On fire, my man. On fire. There you go. Still love each other. You work with over 3100 men in the first 20 months of your business your wife's worked with nearly 1000 women tell us your story not only how you grew up and kind of what shaped you into you know starting to have

issues in your marriage and how that played out yeah absolutely my i would say my parents paved the next two decades of my adult life so the the moment I moved away, I was duplicating and repeating my father, who's a narcissist. I was trying to do the opposite, actually, a lot of times. And then my mom's just a selfish woman. And so I saw screaming and screaming and screaming. Not a lot of physical abuse, but certainly terrible. Lick the the toilet prove it's clean you know and yeah yeah yeah and you know i was never allowed to feel i was never i was taught i wasn't allowed to have needs you know and i was taught i was i was worthless i think they said i love you a handful of times and i'm proud of you all on one hand you know yeah and all that did was it propelled me into my adult life where all i knew was anger. Literally, I would fight. If I didn't have anybody to talk to but you, Chris, you were the guy that was getting the fight today. Wow.

I brought that to every relationship, and it got worse and worse and worse. Then by the time I met my wife, I destroyed her. I destroyed her. I was so broken. At the time, we had no idea what narcissism was. People weren't throwing it around like they do now. And I was just, it was, I would tower over it,

scream at her and flip her out of the bed and say that you have to meet my needs. You're not doing this. And I can go on and on. But eventually I just realized, whoa, this isn't going to work. And it was because it was court mandated anger management or else I go to jail. And I'd already done 14 years of therapy that I'd done nothing. And so I had to, I had to, I mean, I was understood a little more for my trauma, but that's what it's like with therapy 14 years.

It's acceptable to not be there yet. I couldn't do that with my job, you know, and along the way I started to get three days of joy. Then we'd fight and I was like, wow, this is so cool. And my wife was like, that's not normal. So I started to click. I started to click. And I just want to put this out there for the listeners.

You don't know what you don't know. Yeah, it's true. We've talked about that a lot on the show. There are things you know, and there's things you know you don't know. Like I know I don't know algebra, and I don't care. And then what you don't know you don't know like i know i don't know algebra and i don't care and then what you don't know you don't know which will probably hit me in the side of the head later today the you went through you you said you also became a severe narcissist i've seen that passed down from narcissistic fathers i may have known a little bit of that and then you would go

through seven day anchor pinches and so you you go through seven separations with you and your wife, to my understanding. Is that correct? Yeah, that's correct. All we married within 30 days. And then we, I mean,

I knew her for a few months, but we married right away. And then within 30 days, the, the, the problem started to happen. And yeah, it was,

it was a nightmare. It was an absolute nightmare. And I mean, you had a restraining order, you reached the point of restraining order and one year probation, you were charged with assault. Do I have that correct too? That's correct. Yeah. And so it was the court mandating or management that started to, Oh, it did not work. And 14 years of therapy work.

So what finally clicked the corner for you? Yeah, neither did not work. And 14 years of therapy worked. So what finally clicked the corner for you? Yeah, neither of those worked. But what I found was I started to enjoy something different. Now, there is another factor here. And again, why my wife and I run our program separate is that she started to recognize if I was capable of loving the way I was, the love bombs from a narcissist, then I was capable of giving more of that if I understood what that felt like. So she started to come at me with a little more

compassion, a little more empathy, a little bit more of a gentle approach rather than trying to fight back. Because she was quite reactively abusive. I think that's important for people to know is she got really angry and rightfully so but when she started to change her tone because i recognized what happiness started to feel like she was like on board and then we started to move forward together so let me ask you this because this is an important piece of the puzzle what was her childhood were there things that had caused trauma in her that made her attracted to you and and you know usually in like this, there's not one person that has toxic issues or trauma issues or, you know, stuff from their past that they're dealing with. That's a great question. No, she had actually a wonderful upbringing.

Her father and her just connect like you wouldn't believe. But her mom and her, her mom and her have a little bit of trouble. And, you know, a lot of do you love me, do you like me kind of stuff. And so there was definitely needs not being met, which is, I mean, even if you have a happy home, you can be going through the same thing. Kids are egocentrical, right? So I don't think that that's what made her find me. In fact, we were, we,

we just happened to both be on this path of we're not really rushing to date. We're trying to slow down, just going out there and getting, you know, some action. We're trying to figure out what it is that we actually want. It started to really push towards who we were going to be if we weren't going to change things. And so when we connected, I think that I said the right things. I did the right things because I meant them, but I didn't know how. And she saw something in me.

Now, most people don't survive this i don't know if you ever lost your wife's respect but there's one thing i know whether you're married or whether you're single if you're a man and you lose your wife's respect or your girlfriend's respect it's near impossible to get it back you pretty much have to leave and start over in my experience did you ever reach that point where you think you lost her respect? I mean, once you get to the, the probation stage and restraining or stage, it's hard to come back from. Oh my gosh. Yeah. So one of our episodes that we recently released in our podcast was about how she would be so almost violent in public because she had support, right? She could,

she could feel safe, even though her friends didn't support it. Oh, my gosh, I have a tattoo on my arm. She looks like an angel on my arm. And she was like, block it out. You're a piece of it. You know, she just let me have it. But there was lots of other different things, you know. Sometimes she would go out and party and say, I don't need you.

That's disrespectful. Or she would scream at me that you're on probation. Oh, boy, it was my turn. Cause I couldn't fight back, you know? So it wasn't the whole year, but there were certain times and certain allotments of time where she was throwing things, the phone comes and past my face, you know? And so there was lots, there was also the, the, the screaming that I could go find someone else. Oh, I did this with this person and this person. I would never do that with you.

Tons of it. But I have to say, I disagree with you. Respect can come back, and I'll tell you why. If you could enable the disrespect, because she wasn't like that on the first date. It slowly got there. Even in my situation, it slowly got there. If you could enable the negative, you can enable the positive. Go get your wife to respect you again.

Show up differently. You know? Yeah. It starts with showing up and maintaining frame or holding frame and maintaining frame. You know, providing a masculine frame so that she can be in her feminine. And that's usually where you see you know women struggling and acting out is because they can't feel secure in the frame they can't they can't feel that you're protecting them or being that masculine person so you guys you guys spent over 380 000 dollars

on courses diplomas degrees did you do that to help you get through what you were going through or to help kind of complete the mastery of what you'd done and how to try and help educate other people? What a great question. Actually, so we started because we needed to. So some of that money includes business stuff and some of that money includes relationship stuff. And I remember we had some wonderful friends. We were not doing well with our business at the time who gave us their credit card, but I'm a go, I just go, go, go. And it costs 120 grand, made 120 grand in eight weeks, kept on rolling it back into more, more, more. And with relationship stuff, now we just continue to do it. We want to know what else is out there. We want to know what else is missing. Is there more that we can learn? And so that doesn't matter if it's books, courses, coaches, mentors.

The more you can learn. I think you should be never done rising up and learning. That's true. That's why we do the show. I learn more than my audience does every day. I think, I don't know. I sit here and pick up epiphanies and learn all sorts of cool stuff. That's the only reason I do it.

Plus, I love people. I don't love all people, let's put it that way. Politicians, that sort of thing. Dumb people. You go on this whole journey. Talk to us about what is this thing where society

is allegedly... I'm just setting you up. I'm not saying allegedly for any matter. How is society allegedly destroying marriage with some of the solutions they offer and what they tell people? This is actually, it's a long lecture, so I won't get into it. It's about 20 minutes to teach this. Yeah, we don't have that kind of time. We don't have that kind of time.

No, but the simplified version is this. If you think about the examples that you're shown, right? If you think about even just from how you're raised. So most of us parent our children in the exact same way, right? Don't cry. There's nothing to be afraid of. Go to sleep. Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa. Why are you screaming? If you scream like that, I'm taking away your toy. So we start, we're expected to be a man and a woman in marriage. And we already don't know how to communicate our feelings and already don't know we have needs. And then when we try to fix it, we do more of what society shows us. A big one would be communication.

You got to talk about it. Don't go to bed angry. No, my wife and I will agree. I should have gone to bed angry because the abuse would have been a lot less, you know what I'm saying? You don't,

you don't have the skills, right? And so there are some, another one's happy wife, happy life. You know, men hear this all the time. Oh God.

Listen, dude, if you act like a little baby and a sissy then your wife is going to think you're a sissy that's it right a lot of men don't get that women need to be in their feminine frame to feel safe safety is a really big deal for women i i still i think i still underestimate how big safety and security is for women and if they don't feel like you're a man who can take on the evil shit that might come through the door one day or you know in public be able to defend her you know if she doesn't feel

safe she's gonna she's she's gonna act out she's gonna have problems she's gonna go find somebody she feels safe with chris yeah go ahead, please. So there's such a beautiful, beautiful points that the peace pillar is the first thing in my program because she needs to feel safe and she needs to trust you or you have nothing, right? The only way to do that is to be in your masculinity, like you said. Now go back to disrespect that you were talking about because you outlined one of the biggest fears of disrespect, which is her morals as she cheats. Okay. If she went somewhere to feel safe, we can address problem two and cheating later. Problem one, you didn't show up and honor your commitment first. She's not safe with you.

That's why she's angry at you. Exactly. And that's why she might yell at you. I always use the joke if she kicks you in the balls, right? If you didn't make her feel safe and she felt like she could look down on you with that much disrespect, well, you're not very good at keeping her safe, emotionally connecting, you know? You've lost frame, basically.

Yes. Maybe you had it. You know, maybe when you first met her, you were doing all the right things. You're kind of being protective and, you know, you'd hold her hand and move her to the, if you're out on the sidewalk or street, you move her to the inside of the lanes to protect her from anything bad happening. You know, just, just the, just the whole, there's a whole arc to it, I think, and, and frame to it. And so people do that when they're first dating and then after a while they don't, you know, and then, you know, she feels out in the open,

you know, there's, there's, there's so many nuances to this. Like I, like I said, I'm still 52, 55,

I'm 55 now. And I think 50, when I started really deeply realizing how security is inherent to them and they don't, and they're not really that aware of it. It's, it's, it's something that is just biological for them and where they,

where they feel it. And sometimes they don't know why they're acting out about it because they don't feel protected and safe. And that's kind of what our role is as a man in a masculine frame is to provide and protect. Yeah, I think it's a real damn shame. Guys think that I provide, I protect, I'm a great guy and I'm a great dad is going to solve the problem. Let me tell you something right now. If your wife leaves you today, you still have to make money. You still have to provide for her and the kids. You still have to be a great dad. And maybe you're protecting someone different now,

but maybe, or sorry, and you're still going to have to be a great guy or you're going to be single. This is called baseline normal. You're not special. This is baseline normal. In fact, if you don't try to make all of those even better, then maybe we can talk about how you're a better guy, but it's still baseline normal because those are, it's nothing special. And the big one that you just hit on there was protection too.

Like how many times are you sliding across the hood of your BMW to protect your wife from kidnappers? You're not protecting your wife, man. Shut up. If you're defending yourself, you are not protecting your wife, your marriage, your future. Nothing. If your job and your masking is to maintain the mood, the tone, the energy, and let her feel because you're the rock, the lighthouse, the shoreline. We didn't make this up. If that's your job, you have zero business defending yourself.

I'm not saying you can't be looking for a reciprocal relationship, but first don't you have to show up? You do. And I think this is important why guys need to keep going to the gym. They need to make sure they maintain their masculinity, their masculine frame, because if you stay in your masculinity you provide that protection frame for her she can be feminine because she's safe if you if you take that away then she's then she's not going to be feeling safe and she's going to be freaking out and

and you probably eventually break up you know going to the gym keeping your body up in shape you know she's got to know that you're, you know, it really comes down to that biological caveman sort of bullshit. A lot of people just don't realize it comes down to that caveman shit. If you can take on, you know, you know, the dangers that are going to come at her in the world that could potentially come at her in the world, that's a big deal. And if you're not in shape, you know, you've eaten chips on the thing, you know, she's, she's, this guy's going to be able to protect me if, if something happens, you know, you know, some home invasion or, you know, they, they, there's a whole different principle

they have. And it's all about protecting the womb when it really comes down to it. Women protect the womb because they, number one, have to have the best DNA come through it. And they also want to have the choice of what comes into it. But it's about propagating the species when it really comes down to it and getting the best DNA for propagation of species. Women control the womb. They are the ones that control access to sex. Men control access to marriage. So I think you mentioned something about the nice guy or being nice. The thing i hear married guys say that i'm just like you

just rang the death note bell happy wife happy life what what what is the problem with being a nice guy and why is katherine your wife call the nice guy is assholes so nice guy comes from a man named dr robert glover in the 80s he wrote a book no more mr nice guy and it's it's a man who gives and gives and gives and he loves and he needs it i don't i don't think he's doing anything wrong he does he wants to fix everything he wants to make everything great but it's actually something called a covert contract so chris what he does is he's giving to get right even by saying i'm a provider i'm giving you you all this. You should want me. You should want to have sex with me right now. You should show me my love language. It's give to get. And if we, before the show, we were talking about it, things like gratitude and affirmation work a lot faster

than cramming down your wife's throat. Why you're so great. It's the exact reason she's not cramming anything down her throat because she you're just sitting there telling her that you're trying to convince her. I'm a great guy. You should love me. I'm a great guy. You should be dropping everything and running to the door when I come home because I do all of this, this, this. The nice guy is a nice asshole because what happens is after a while, you don't feel it reciprocated.

You end up internalizing the pain. You feel lonely, isolated. Why am I the only one trying until you can't do it anymore? And you just lash out. And I was the extremely rageful version. Yeah. And if you're, would you say when you were going through the rage issues, do you think you were in a masculine frame or a feminine frame?

Because you're reacting with emotion. Yeah. Total feminine. Total feminine. And if you think about a lot of men today, their wife's already in the masculine. And whether or not she has a career or not, she's running the schedule,

what the kids are wearing, marketplace pickups, what we're having for dinner, where we're going for dates. This is called masculine. And then you don't let her feel and you defend yourself when she's just, oh, had a bad day. And you start saying, I know my day, this and that.

And now you're feminine and she has to go back to her masculine. Where do you think this goes? Nice guy gets angry. Yeah. And then the sex goes to pot too. I mean, once you, once as a man, you become a woman's child because she can't feel safe in her feminine and you're operating in your, in your feminine too. I mean, it's really a simple feminine masculine it's very simple it is but you know david data coined it right he figured it all out

he put this great book out but here's the thing there's no real step by step with it it's a lot of resources out there so if you think about he didn't talk about any of this stuff but we were talking about society solutions earlier one of them would be hey honey i did the dishes i did the laundry i tidied the living room for you what is this he's trying to do happy wife happy life he's trying to do chores to to convince her everything's okay she has more energy see i'm such a great guy i did all this and now he wants a cookie she's not going to give him his cookie because of what you just said yeah she's his mom yeah she's his mom right his mom. And the problem with the nice guy paradigm is,

and the reason women don't like nice guys, even though they say they don't and never listen to what they say, watch what they do, is the principle there. But the reason they don't like nice guys is because they're fake. They know they don't live their purpose. They don't live their standards. They don't value themselves. they're willing to placate they're willing to kneel beg borrow plead just to get sex or to get you know relationship feedback or love or whatever the case is they're willing

to sell themselves out if you study good i was going to say the new term for it is actually simp if you simp it's just looking for approval and validation if you look at the comments on my on my social media when a reel goes viral you'll see a lot of guys that are like anti-simp anti-simp and so they all they hear they're so afraid of understanding the masculine that all they hear is oh you're just trying to do this so you can have more sex or so your wife will love you and validate you. And they don't notice that the message is actually stop doing that. That's why your wife doesn't want you to start showing up and being an adult, for example, with chores. And so you're absolutely right.

If we can break away from that, then the nice guy is or simp, however you want to look at it, he's just showing up as a man. That's all it is. Man, husband, father, leader in life. Just go be who you're born to be. Purpose, like you said. Yeah. Women want a guy who lives his purpose. They don't marry a man.

They're marrying a lifestyle. So when they meet a man, they want a guy who's on his purpose, whose purpose isn't women, who isn't, you know, making people happy and being servile. They want Kings. They want killers. Women want killers. They want killers in society. They want guys who will go out and kill in business, you know, kill in business that way. Don't do the other thing. Cause you'll end up in front of a judge. That's bad. But you but you know in there was a time where that was needed you wanted a knight in shining armor who go out and kill armies and fight battles and you know kill the marauding hordes that would come into the town in a medieval sense and that really hasn't changed it's just more subtle than it is now i mean if you

if you want to study something you know one of my uh friends rolo tomasi who wrote the who wrote the the books there people can pull them up i forget what they're called but you know, one of my friends, Rolo Tomasi, who wrote the books, people can pull them up, I forget what they're called, but, you know, he talks about hybristophilia. And when you study why women chase these murderers, they're on death row, and they'll marry them, and they'll write them, and they'll just endlessly fall in love with them. Women want a guy who's a killer. They want a guy who's not going to take any shit at work who's not going to take shit from people who's not going to be someone who's going to be stepped on by anyone and what she knows subconsciously when she shit tests a man is that if you will

allow her to step on you disrespect you treat you like shit treat you like a doormat she knows that you'll let everybody else in in the world treat that way. And if that will happen, she knows you're not going to go anywhere because you're not going to be successful. And that will impact her financial security, the security of her and her children and her future. And she knows that. Well, that's all important, Chris, but hold on, go back to the safety that you talked about.

If you can't handle your wife's mood, your little wife's mood, how in the world does she expect that you, like you said, the perpetrators coming in the house, the challenges at work. I can't tell you how many men that I work with that they double their income inside of 90 or 120 days. Why? Because they're not living in the fog of hiding behind their wife's mood it's affecting every decision they make it's effect they're wearing their heart on their sleeve and they

can't even the most successful they do so much better because they're not afraid to stand up and slay the dragon now the same confidence they should have they have in all aspects of their lives yeah feminine nature is feminine nature is to serve the masculine. And there's a reason for that. It's all biology. It's all caveman shit. And if you don't give her the opportunity by creating an alpha frame, she can't do that. And that's going to bug her as well.

So, you know, it's funny how a lot of guys we just don't get it and a lot of us have been lied to in society because last two generations have been raised by you know beta fathers and and all this nonsense of you know shaming masculinity and all that good stuff what's interesting about anyone out there who's listening going yeah i heard masculine is you know it's toxic and it's bad no it's not actually if you study like i do i've been i've been single for 35 years i've dated in triple digits um and uh i i i i pretty much know what's going on and when you look at tinder right now all the women are chasing the top masculine men the guys who earn the most or the best looking or both and that's what they're all chasing now. They're not chasing, you know, the guy who can't figure out which sexy is not saying there's anything wrong with that,

but they're not chasing, you know, Mr. Guy who just wants to hug and play nice guys and simp and comments on Instagram. So there you go. So the nice guy syndrome, it's bad. Stop doing it, boys. You have something that's interesting to me called the rejection ladder what is that and why did you create it so on the fourth version of my course is after working with thousands of guys i was like there's something that guys are missing they're not catching and i figured out if i could show them the rejection ladder it'd be a tool they could reference easily which by the way guys can reach out to me and i'll send it to you it's i think every man should know it but at the top would be sex and there's different tiers but each rung on the ladder means something right you're not having the sex that you've been fighting for

say i provide i do all this why don't you want me why would you have that if at the very bottom you can't even handle your wife's mood that That's true. Yeah. We work our way up the ladder. Yeah. I heard this from once, I don't know which psychologist said it, but it was from somebody, but even the act of sex is the act of showing your wife or girlfriend that you are strong, you're powerful, that you could take on an aggressor. There's an aggression to sex. And, you know, and part of that is showing her that you have the

ability to go do almost hand-to-hand combat with somebody it's it's really a subtle thing i don't know if you've you've ever thought about that way but i heard a psychologist talk about that once and it's a way of proving it is if you if you go to nice guys okay think about all the listeners here if you think about it if you're trying to just make okay. Think about all the listeners here. If you think about it, if you're trying to just make sure you take care of her instead of actually enjoy you, right? This is just,

I'm not saying don't take care of your wife. Good God. I love to take care of my wife. But at the same time, if you never allow yourself to enjoy that, again, you're not really a man. You're just,

Oh wait, which position would you like, honey? You know, I'm not saying she can't have opinions. I'm not saying you don't take care of her, but at the end of the day, yes, it ties into. And then actually when we talk about it, we go further, Chris. So we'll say the more violent you become, not in the bedroom, but the more violent you become. So say, you know, jujitsu, then the less violent you actually are.

Now you can take that energy to the bedroom, and you firmly, aggressively love your wife. You know when to go slow, when to go fast, and then there's so much more you can learn on that stuff too. There you go. When to bring the twins in and her. Wait, are we on the same page? Not how I do it.

I'm single. Yeah, different life. I live in Vegas. You know, one of the things you inferred there is men need to lead. Why are men so damned afraid to lead anymore? Why is being the lead in your relationship so important? Great question. So the first question is simple.

If you think about all the examples that we're seeing that you have, you have this whole feminist movement, all these women that are strong, independent, even if they're not feminists, they're just like my wife, I'm a super strong woman. Okay. And then you have the men that are not allowed to be masculine because that's toxic. No, like you said, that's, there's toxic people. There's nothing wrong with being a man, masculine. Okay. Now that's society's marriage, right? Now you can put together all the examples that you've been shown and you have no idea what is appropriate. Should I cry? Should I not cry? Am I sensitive? Am I not sensitive? Do I let her feel? Do I not let her feel? Or doesn't it take two? And we have all this confusion. Listen, go to the rejection ladder.

You are responsible for the mood in your home. Meaning even if your children are losing their mind, do you want to yell at them or do you want to lead your children? Nobody follows if they're being screamed at, whether it's your wife or whether it's your kids. So I believe leadership is simple. If you want to overcome the examples that you've been shown, do something different. Go in there and lead. Now, we have a different take, Catherine and I. So I think the man's responsible for the tone. You said it.

I don't care if she's mad at you. Don't take it personal. Same if she's not mad at you. Definitely don't take it personal. And then you set the tone for the mood. And then from there, if you do this right, that's the new marriage, then you both have strengths, man. some things i'll be good at leading some things my wife will be good at leading and we boost each other but there's no more anchor yeah and i would give you that even

even under an alpha frame she's still not leading she's operating under your provider protector role so i don't know. A hundred percent. That's my perception. No, you're absolutely right. You're absolutely right. Catherine will be the first one to tell you, I have a lot of masculine.

It was a challenge for me to accept leadership. We did an episode on our podcast on it, actually. Really? Yeah, it was very, very difficult for Catherine because even though she knew she wanted her whole life, that would be allowing somebody to take over this strong independence. Let me tell you, because there's going to be allowing somebody to take over the strong independence. Let me tell you, because there's going to be a lot of listeners that will appreciate this.

When you nail partnership down with your wife, if you've got that kind of woman, and you should, strong, independent, intelligent, fun, goal-oriented, all of these things you can bring out of her, that's you lead it. And now we're not talking about hashtag couple goals, or I guess it's this, hashtag couple goals. We're talking about superpower couple, because now you're both filled with purpose and you're both filled with life. You know what I mean? Is it true that when people hear the word lead, they think of control and they

should, in my opinion. But do you think, do you agree with me on that yeah i have a lot i think they think that leading means i control you and i tell you what to do and monitor every fucking little thing you do no that's not leading no it's not no that's managing control yeah and if you think about the alpha stuff yeah your alpha stuff you're talking about chris where where where people think they got to go beat their chest alpha that's not leading yeah that's using negative will never create positive and if you think about more society examples biblical she should submit she should serve no dude first you're supposed to show up

solomon then you could talk about that exactly if you don't create the frame she's not going to find it she's you know most women are going to be operating in their masculine in today's world. Like you said, they're going to have their business. You know, if women don't have a masculine, they're going to play both roles. They're going to be feminine and masculine. And they're going to do their own leadership because, you know, they don't have a man around. A lot of this stuff that we've been taught in the last 60 years is bullshit. And men have sadly been taught a lot of stuff

that's just bullshit. And it's funny that when you really look at what women are searching for, when you see their search results online, if you've ever watched them sit and go through profiles on a Tinder thing, you see a different thing than what you're being told. Watch what they say or watch what they do, not what they say. And they're looking for leaders. They're looking for masculinity. I mean, that's what they're searching for. They're looking for a man who will lead,

who will make them feel safe and they're feminine. I mean, I've seen people that are, you know, those, I'm a feminist, I'm very strong and, you know, independent woman blah blah blah man they meet a they meet an alpha male and we're not talking like you said alpha males i think there's a misperception on to the alpha alpha male some guy like i don't know arnold schwarzenegger some sort of weird chest beating monkey that's i don't know rocked out on steroids or some shit and he's a super narcissist and i don't, he beats up people every other week or something, or maybe he's in prison for some shit.

But, you know, an alpha male means somebody who's got his shit on, who's living his purpose, who's doing his thing. And a woman is a compliment to his life. And she's the one who's going to help make his life better. But he's doing it on his own and Rocky. And that's what women want. They want a guy who's a killer, who's going to kill it in business, who's going to kill it in money, who's going to kill it in life, who's going to protect her, but also be successful. Because I don't think what a lot of men don't realize is women know that they're on a limited timeline. Our sexual peak hits about 55 because we're valued by earnings. We're valued by our ability to provide resources

and protection. Women are valued by beauty. So their peak is in the sexual dating market about 23. There's stats and charts on if you don't believe me. And so they know that when they make an investment in the man, that they are giving a limited timeline to their beauty to get the best results and resources for both themselves and their children. And they're very angry with you if you're mucking it up because they've made that investment of you and they don't want to have to hop to a new thing and they know it gets harder and harder as they get older. And guys have to realize that. She's made an investment in me, and she's betting in me to be the best version of myself that I can be. And if I'm not and she's pissed off at me, it's because I'm failing in some way and frame.

Yeah, if you think about it, I have a saying that I – listen, your wife signed up for a fairy tale. You might give her the kingdom, but where's the Prince charming at the end of the day, she is investing in you. And I think that men think they're invincible these days. They think that their, their wife won't leave. Their woman won't leave because you know, I I've got it all in control. I'm doing what I'm supposed to do. These baseline normal things. And then they're forgetting that they're undermining anything positive with the blame game, with

screaming at their wife, with threatening divorce. Or I could sleep with the girl at Starbucks. All this shit. They don't realize that the more that they do this, you take away that Prince Charming. Plus you stop dating. Plus you're farting in front of her. You didn't do the manners thing that you talked about earlier. Good catch, by the way.

You don't realize that all of these things are making it worse. And then you think the grass is greener. Guys, anybody who doesn't believe what Chris just said, I want you to think about this. How many times has your wife said to you, how do I know this change is going to last? How do I know it's real? I'm not going to make the same mistake again. And I could give you a thousand cliches here. What is she saying? She's saying, I don't trust you. I don't believe you. I don't know if I should give myself to you. And then here's the tie-in. Man, she could get a dollar more an hour raise. She could start a business on Etsy. Her friend Cindy could get divorced. It doesn't really matter what it is, a death in the family. She's had one too

many fights and not felt safe enough where she just quits. And I've seen a hundred millionaires. Some of my clients are very rich, a hundred millionaires have a wife walk away, walk away with a suitcase, a couple of pictures and the kids. They don't care about the money. Really? They don't care about the money. They don't. I actually talked to a woman probably two months ago but she was like i still don't care i still i just i'm so peaceful now yeah so peaceful now yeah because she's providing her own masculine now and she at least feels safe in that because she can't feel safe in his yeah and we're getting a lot of great agreements wow you're live i think some of this is coming from your Facebook.

Yes, yes, yes. People are saying through as we're chatting. And yeah, it's really interesting how guys just don't get that frame. And you can't tell her that it's going to be okay. Okay, it's going to change this time, honey. Talking is feminine. Showing, doing is masculine. That's what we do.

We don't do 35,000 words a day. That's what women do. That's how they're built. It's a feature, not a bug. And understanding these complex roles, they're not that complex. They're very caveman. And if you understand that what we're all about is the propagation of the species. And so why are women built the way they are? Why are men built the way they are in a testosterone feminine sort of frame we're designed to be complements of each other but that we are designed to to lead as men to do things it's why we're giving up our body strength to be able to fight kill hunt down stuff do whatever we need to do to protect the family and there's a reason why femininity and feminism and women are built physically different than us. And so it's just there.

It's very simple in its frame. And if men aren't providing that safety, that frame, that network, and you can't tell her, you've got to show her. She sees how you come and convey yourself, how you command. When I walk into a room or any man walks in a room, women notice. They look at the guy and they go, is he an option for me? And especially if they're single, but they also go, is he confident? And if you come into a room commanding the room in confidence, you're held high, how you hold your frame and all that sort of good stuff, they notice. And so if you're in a relationship, they're noticing that too. They're noticing how you come across, how you interact with them.

Do you seem confident all the time? Do you seem weak? Are you crying? That's the worst thing you can do is cry in front of a woman. There's actually studies that show that the first time you cry in front of a woman is the very first time she will start biologically starting going, I don't know about this guy. You have to keep masculine frame. And it's so important because she's watching you all the time. The shit test that you get, do you ever counsel people on shit testing and passing? I do a little bit different though.

Cause I do. I really believe everybody tests. If you tell me you're going to go to the gym, Chris, and then you don't go to the gym, I'm going to call you. I'm going to call you. You know what I mean?

Sorry. But, but I think that if you go back to safety to understand that she needs to know it's real, then you have to allow it and understand it, whether it's subconscious or conscious. The problem that I have with shit test though, is my wife and I really firmly believe you're setting your partner up to fail. So if she's working with a woman, she'll encourage them to understand that this is not teaching him that you want him. It's teaching him to be more of the nice asshole because you're hurting him. But when I work with men, I say, let's expect it.

And I teach response versus reaction with something I call safe reaction is keeping yourself safe, protecting yourself. It's that response is teaching yourself to respond provide leadership structure for where you want this to go and when i do that the last t in stat is test is she testing me but really is she holding me accountable thanks thanks for the reminder baby you nailed it something i'm like thank you for the reminder wow you just have a laugh about it you know that's an amazing epiphany dude instead of thinking it was a shit test think think of it as she's holding you accountable. She's testing you to see if, okay, are you full of shit? Are you actually holding frame? You know, stoicism, I think one of the biggest things men can learn, especially when dealing

with emotion and of course, controlling our own emotions and making sure we're processing through the masculine of logic and reason, as opposed to being in our feminine and processing through emotion and a lot of guys especially guys that have trauma you know they they process through the feminine still they don't even realize it yeah if you if you think about almost every reaction that you're going to make is going to be fear-based. You have the anxiety, the insecurity, the fear. Guys, there's so many. Fear of losing, fear of failure. Think about all the poor men who haven't figured this out yet,

and they think, oh, my gosh, I'm not making enough money. My wife makes more money. I'm losing my job. And what happens? They start to feel bad. For me, it wasn't about money it was just feel of fear of failure with my wife what kind of man am i i'm gonna lose my everything my family my wife is my everything then my family then and then you start to think things like i'll have life insurance what

if i just you know and you start to go that's also feminine. Literally, emotion is the root of all success, but also all your failure. There you go. In fact, Susie was agreeing with her comment earlier that when women go off and say, I can live without a man, she's saying, I can struggle just fine by myself. If I'm going to struggle, I don't need this other guy that I'm having to carry. I mean, the worst thing that I could ever have if I was ever in a long-term relationship again was a woman telling me reference or tell somebody within earshot of me that, that I was their child. And I was, you know, like all of a few of my married buddies, they, they have wives who go, yeah, he's my fourth child. And I'm just like, oh my fucking God.

Another one of society's jokes has become normalized and guys think it's funny you know another thing about that is the dad bod you know all these normal jokes that we all make listen like you said when you command respect because you walk in the room muscles command respect never mind the health benefits never mind the energy with your kids your wife when you get there it's super fun to have muscles trust me because that stuff in the bedroom that we were talking about. These society jokes lead men astray. They're so confused nowadays.

They're so confused. Don't listen to what they say. Watch what they do. The dad bod thing is something that guys don't even understand what that's about. And that's probably a whole episode in and of itself. That's another show. That's another show. But these are aspects that are so important. I think it's important that men need to realize they need to reframe back to their masculine

state and understand what it's about. Because if you really study biology, it's really fairly simple. The application you mentioned is very different because it's very detailed and women are very complex, but they're built that way. It's a feature, not a bug. And if you understand why they're built that way, why they need protection, why they need to have a masculine frame around them and, and you know, why we're attracted to them. We're attracted to the feminine because you know, they're, it's a nurturing state where they take care of our kids. They take care of our family. They,

they flush out their nest and build their nest and make it beautiful. And if she doesn't have that, then she doesn't need you. No. And you know something that's, I think, really important to note with that is it can feel frustrating when you start changing and she doesn't embrace your masculine, right? A lot of times that can come across as a couple of different things like, well, you're just trying to control me or manipulate me. That's actually real because you were the nice guy and you were giving to get before.

So just let her feel, love her through it. But the other side is that she just doesn't trust you. Okay. That just means you have to be consistent. And the last part about it is really important. If you just show up and you know where you're going, do what that guy would do. Because are you proud of who you are? Because you can have everything you want. And when your wife is excited to see you come home, you're not afraid to walk through the door. You know she's going to

miss you, kiss you, love you, want to hear about you. And when your wife is telling people how much she loves you, lifting you up, building you up. She's looking at you across the room at an event and you just know she's not listening to them. When she's stuffing panties down your pocket, putting the kids to bed, pounding you in the bathroom at the restaurant, like banging on the beamer, you don't feel these insecure, anxiety-filled, fear-based processes making your decisions. You're lifted and you are conquering the freaking world it's so it's so true you know i've had girlfriends always say to me you are my rock you know men we're supposed to be stoic we have emotion but we can process your logic and reason and we can be

stoic about it and so we we don't deal with the emotional storms we can we can feel our emotion and we can go that's cute and then we can go okay so why do i feel that way okay here's here's i'm gonna here's what i'm gonna do to resolve that you know or it is what it is you know there's certain things we you know we say when you can always kind of tell a masculine man because they'll use the lines a lot it is what it is because there are certain things we know we can't change or certain things we have to accept you you know. If you like, Chris, I can give you a couple for your listeners. Please do.

A couple little tips there. Yeah. So, guys, it's really confusing when you're trying to understand how you feel, okay? First of all, you need to understand what you're feeling, but identify it. And then you can use an indisputable fact, right? When you scroll on your phone all night, I feel lonely. That's it. Shut up.

That's it. Okay? That's it. But now, because you haven't figured this out yet, and your wife doesn't know she can trust you, she might come at you. I'm on my phone all the time because now she's thinking all the time you're insecure because she's on the phone. So she's coming at you. I can do whatever I want. It's just a dog rescue. Why are you such a baby?

Yeah, I guess it does sound like I was kind of a child. Smile. Structure for where you want it to go. This is not rocket science, but you have to take the time to learn, and you have to get through that frustrational period. And sometimes the reason she's coming at you, I mean, the one thing you have to understand about women is attention and validation is everything to them and so sometimes you know if you've ever had that

thing where she comes at you and freaks out and you end up being the rock and stoic and you ride it out without without emotionally reacting and flipping out you know then within an hour or two she's back to being cuddly and cute and you're just like oh call me a fucking asshole a second ago even better even better so take the extreme the most extreme fight you've ever had multiply it by 10 million because that was my life day by day with my wife okay and now actually thanksgiving we were talking about before the show started on thanksgiving we had a bunch of guests over and she goes what's your favorite thing about marriage, Catherine? Catherine goes, I can feel. I just feel. I can just let any emotion out and it's okay.

And guys, that will start with ours. You do this with your kids, by the way, too. If you want to be a real great dad, do this with your kids. Okay? Let them feel. And you'll get the worst tantrums on the planet, maybe from both your wife or your kids. But after they get used to feeling safe and they know they can count on you,

they're connected. All of them, your kids and your wife will just start to, it would just be short little bursts, little emotions, and it's done. And then you get on with exactly what you said. We're back to normal, having fun. You won't understand it because she's on the crazy train, but just don't get on with her. Don't meet emotion with emotion, especially as a man. I, you know, don't argue with a woman either. Don't, don't. It's just the dumbest. I'll see guys. I'll have married guys that will call me up. They're my best friends. And they're like, I'm like, yeah,

me and the wife are on the rocks again. I'm like, what are you trying to do? And I'm like, and he's like, you know, she said something. I told her she was wrong. We had an argument about how she thinks I'm wrong and I think she's wrong. And I'm like, are you fucking kidding me? I go, do you want to be right or do you want to be happy? Just how you want to be. I don't know if I entirely agree. But in the end, don't be this.

It does take you down a nice guy road, doesn't it? Yeah, happy life, happy life. But you can agree. Yeah. Or sorry, you can disagree. You can validate and affirm her without agreeing you know and if you do this correctly and she feels safe you will find that you have a wife that's wow we disagree but yeah okay cool and she'll reflect if you're wrong lots of times she'll be right lots of times you'll be wrong lots of times they're solvable problems most of the% of the time, there's not a

solvable problem. You have to compromise. So you might as well start figuring out how to communicate that validation without acting like a little bitch. Yeah. Just be safe. And women exercise their emotion.

They have to do what you said. They have to be able to feel. I mean, if you've ever watched them watch Lifetime TV, it's like the Olympics for their emotions. They love it. It's a whole exercise. They can go through everything. Are you talking about reality shows right now?

Yeah, like reality shows or Lifetime TV. I have never, never heard another man talk about it. I teach it in my course. I'm like, dude, if you want to, the number one way you can flip emotional tension that's negative to positive is to just suck it up and watch the reality tv with your wife number one way also it's a great way for you to get over your anxiety and shit that's a whole nother lesson yeah and for her it's an it's an emotional it's emotional kind of release it's an it's an exercise you know and women are very emotional based and so that's why if you could be the rock if you you can be stoic, if she can come at you with whatever her emotions are flowing through her,

whatever she's feeling, and you can be the rock that holds it down instead of reacting. Because if you really think about it, if you react to her emotionally, you just take whatever insecurities and unsafeness that she's feeling at that moment, and you're just making her feel more unsafe and more insecure but by being the rock by reacting stoically by reacting with that emotion but still acknowledging her and stuff but holding frame of being an alpha in your logic and your reason then she's going to go through that and then she's going to have it exercised from her and then she's going to have it exercise from her. And then she's going to be happy again. A lot of guys just don't get it. No, you have to just put on your big boy pants. Stop being a victim.

Okay. And realize if you're defending yourself, guys, and if you don't believe me with your wife, let's go back to kids for a second. Let's go to your dog. Your dog pees on the carpet. If you're like, I have to clean this up. This is such a pain in the butt.

And you start yelling at your dog. Your dog will come back. But after a while, your wife and your kids won't come back anymore. Stop defending yourself. I realize it sucks to pick up or clean up the pee or pick up the poo. Realize it sucks that you had a bad day and your kids are having a hard time. I realize it sucks that your wife rejected you for sex again today. But do you think by defending yourself and your needs, you're going to get more of what you want? It hasn't worked for a hundred years. It says marriages start to really shit the bed here.

So try something new. And if it's not me, at least listen to somebody like you who seems to get it. We've covered a lot of ground. Final question. Do you believe every marriage can be saved? No, I don't. I hate saying that because my 30-year goal is disrupting divorce and flip. It's a 30-year goal to flip statistics so that my children see better examples.

But I do believe this. I believe 100% of marriages can be saved if one person does what they're supposed to do and is patient long enough. Now, there's a patient's formula. It's a whole other episode. But, yeah, I don't believe it's possible. But the reason why I'm reluctant to really commit to that is because most people are going to look for their way out. See, I tried everything.

My partner, you know, they just blame me for this. They haven't done this. They haven't done that. Listen, now you're the narcissist. Just shut up. Mm-hmm. Yeah yeah it's interesting there there's some marriages they're just i mean two people shouldn't be playing together at all there you go final thoughts as we go out to pitch out to people on signing up with your services getting your media reaching out to you see about getting involved in your in what you guys do there yeah the first thing i like to say is we're not doing a bunch of sales stuff. So if you guys are

interested in hearing more, listen to our podcast or go watch our social media and see if we resonate. We want to disrupt divorce. So I don't want to save your marriage. I want to save as many as possible. So if you're interested in finding out more, moralmarriage.com will put you in touch with me, but I'll link you to the podcast. Or you can go to all social media, which is Moral Marriage, and just see if it clicks with you. See if you're inspired by us telling the truth, because I think not enough people are telling the truth these days. Definitely.

You need to be honest with yourself, too, as a man. That's really important. The one person you shouldn't be bullshitting is yourself. Be in your masculine frame. Live your purpose. Don't make a woman your life, your purpose, your life's purpose. She wants to know you're going to go get resources, you're going to build a career,

you're going to do things because ultimately those protect her. And a lot of guys nowadays, they don't live their purpose. I've met guys that are like, women are my life. I just want a woman. I just want to be in love. That's all you're doing. You're just being a woman. I just want to be in love. That's all you're doing. You're just being a servile guy and all that interesting stuff.

Can I give you a quick analogy for that? Please do. I tell guys, you're a big, bad race car by the time I'm done with you. The fastest car on the track, your wife is just the racing stripes on the car. If you want her in the passenger seat or riding your stick, then you're gonna need to get on the cover of the magazine. Why? Because she's just a racing stripes.

She makes you look pretty. Just show up for you, fulfill your life. And all the little pieces will supercharge the car. Women love a man who's going somewhere. If you watch what they do, what they chase, they want guys who are going somewhere,

who are doing something with themselves, who are the best versions of themselves. And that's what men need to do, is be the best version of themselves. And then everything will sometimes work out. Georgie asks, where do I find the podcast through Alexa on Moral Marriage and more information?

Just search Moral Marriage. It's on every platform or go to links. dot moralmarriage.com and it will show you all of them. There you go. And I think she's got it spelled right. She does. Someone was asking, what if you can't afford the counseling? I don't... We can't afford the counseling. We give a lot away for free just

because we want to give like the society training I was talking about, the rejection ladder. Catherine would have some stuff for you too. So if you're a woman, you want to reach out to Catherine, you can do that through moralmarriage.com. There you go, Erica. They've got a lot of great stuff on their TikTok and Instagram. The TikTok is really cool.

And so there's a lot of data sharing there. So that's what I would take and do. Georgie says, thank you. And Erica, yeah, check that out and see what you want to do and give it time. There you go. Somebody put the link in the chat. Links.morrowmarriage.com. Thanks, Catherine.

There you go. Great show and interesting thing. And yeah, if we could save more people's marriage, get the sex going again. And, you know, I'm all for married people having more sex because one of my problems being single is half these marriage half the half these dating apps are marriage guys who are unhappy they're not getting sex and they're miserable and so i have to compete with them and i'm tired of competing with them after so you're a little selfish to have me on the show i am selfish i'm one of those single women of myself damn it it's hard enough out here a single woman for 35 years i've been yelling at married guys going get the fuck out of my goddamn pool you sold your soul go go deal with your own shit stay out of my stay in my pool

there's nothing worse than i meet some wonderful woman that i i'm like yeah i could probably make her she might be a shot at a wife and and she's i'm i'm on the whole thing for this other guy who's gonna leave his wife and you're like honey that guy can't going to leave his wife. And you're like, honey, that guy can't afford to leave his wife. It's cheaper to keep her. He's going to be worthless if he leaves his wife. So you should probably find whatever. So I hate guys that end up doing that, but there you go. I give my married folks lots of ribbing, but I'm glad, you know, I want more guys to save their marriages. I want more guys to be masculine. This world needs more masculine men. And when you really understand the dynamic problems from everything from

top to bottom, what goes on in our societies, especially in America, in politics, everything, it all comes down to we've got way too many weak feminine men in this world, and they need to go back to their masculine. That's just it, in my opinion. Thank you very much for coming to the show,

Cass. We really appreciate it. Thanks for having me, buddy. I had a great time today. There you go. Keep changing lives, buddy. And thanks to our artists for tuning in. Go to goodreads.com, 4Chess, Chris Voss, LinkedIn.com, 4Chess, Chris Voss, YouTube.com, 4Chess, Chris Voss, the big LinkedIn newsletter, the 130,000 group on LinkedIn as well,

Chris Voss, Facebook.com, and Chris Voss1 on the Tickety Talking. Thanks to everyone for tuning in. Be good to each other. Stay safe. Have your testosterone checked too. And we'll see you guys next time. I probably should have...