The Chris Voss Show - The Chris Voss Show Podcast – Meant For More: Overcoming challenges to create the life we deserve by Mechelle Webb

Episode Date: January 14, 2025

Meant For More: Overcoming challenges to create the life we deserve by Mechelle Webb Mechellewebb.com Amazon.com Meant For More: Overcoming Challenges to Create the Life We Deserve is a powerful and heartfelt guide for anyone striving to rise above adversity and unlock their full potential. Drawing from personal experiences as a survivor of childhood adversity, including foster care and abuse, this book shares a deeply personal yet universal message: resilience and a growth mindset can transform even the most challenging circumstances into opportunities for growth and fulfillment. Through the lens of two core strategies—Cultivating Conscious Resilience and Nurturing a Growth Mindset—the book offers a practical roadmap for readers to overcome obstacles, heal from past wounds, and create meaningful, purpose-driven lives. These strategies are not just theoretical concepts but actionable tools tested through real-life trials and triumphs. Written with warmth and authenticity, Meant For More combines compelling personal stories, actionable insights, and evidence-based practices. It empowers readers to embrace their struggles, rewrite their narratives, and take courageous steps toward creating the life they are meant for and deserve. Whether dealing with self-doubt or loss, this book provides a supportive framework for navigating life’s difficulties with resilience and hope. This book is particularly poignant for moms, survivors, and those supporting teenagers or young adults. It speaks to the heart of anyone ready to break free from limiting beliefs, embrace their inherent worth, and achieve a life of fulfillment and purpose. Ultimately, Meant For More is more than a book—it’s an invitation to reclaim your story and step boldly into the future you’ve always imagined. Trigger Warning: This book describes or makes reference to domestic violence, child abuse, sexual abuse, and drug abuse. About the author I'm Mechelle Webb, Certified Mindful Living Coach from the prestigious Jay Shetty Certification School. I empower individuals to cultivate resilience and mindfulness, guiding them toward creating their desired life. Dive into a journey of self-awareness, habit transformation, taking inspired action, and building unwavering resilience. Let's embark on this transformative journey together!

You wanted the best. You've got the best podcast, the hottest podcast in the world. The Chris Voss Show, the preeminent podcast with guests so smart you may experience serious brain bleed. The CEOs, authors, thought leaders, visionaries, and motivators. Get ready, get ready, strap yourself in. Keep your hands, arms, and legs inside the vehicle at all times because you're about to go on a monster education roller coaster with your brain. Now, here's your host, Chris Voss. I'm host Voss here from thechrisvossshow.com. Ladies and gentlemen, the hour lady sings and that makes it official. Welcome to the show. We certainly appreciate you having us.

As always, the Chris Foss Show is a family that loves you, but doesn't loan you money, eh? Especially after Christmas. It's January of 2025 right now, if you're watching this 10 years from now on YouTube. And, yeah, we realize you guys overspend on the holidays, but stop asking for money, eh? We don't do that kind of... We're not a loan. We're not a bank, eh? We're just a stupid podcast. What do you want of, we're not alone. We're not a bank. We're just a stupid, a stupid podcast.

What do you want from us? People? Anyway, moving on from the ramble guys, go over for the shoot, your family, friends, and relatives. We need all the help we can get. We need more listeners. A cause we're, we're, we're narcissistic and we just never feel loved. So please go to good reason.

I come for Christmas, linkedin.com for just Christmas, Christmas one of the tick tockity andreads.com, Fortress Chris Voss, linkedin.com, Fortress Chris Voss, Chris Voss1 on the TikTokity, and chrisfossfacebook.com. You can see all the Chris Voss show groups that we have over there and fan pages and all the crazy stuff. Today we have Michelle Webb on the show. She is a mindful living coach, speaker, entrepreneur, and author of Meant for More, Overcoming Challenges to Create the Life We Deserve. Because doesn't that sound interesting? I mean, there are some people that are trying to create a life that they don't deserve,

or that some people aren't even bothered to create a life. If you fail the plan, you plan to fail. That's basically how that works. We're going to be talking to her today about her insights and her life mission and what she's up to. She's a former foster child and survivor of abuse she's transformed her journey of overcoming adversity into a powerful message of inspiration empowerment for others her story isn't just about her experiences it's about the universal potential for transformation and growth that exists in all of us

she just doesn't share her story she She provides practical tools for resilience, a growth mindset and mindfulness. Her proven strategies, which she uses to navigate unimaginable challenges in life can help anyone build life and purpose and fulfillment. Her message is relevant to those facing everyday struggles and obstacles and moms seeking to empower themselves and their teens. Through her work, she inspires audiences to have the audacity to rise above their circumstances and create the life they deserve. Welcome to the show, Michelle. How are you? Hi, Chris. I'm doing well. Thank you so much for having me. Thanks for coming. We really appreciate having you as well.

Your book came out November 30th, 2024, meant for more overcoming challenges to create the life we deserve. People can find it on Amazon or wherever fine books are sold. Give us your dot coms. Where can people find out more about you on the interwebs? Yes. So michelleweb.com. Just be mindful of the spelling.

M-E-C-H-E-L-L-E, michelleweb.com. From there, you'll find all the links to my social media, YouTube, and how to find my book as well. So give us a 30,000 overview. What's inside your new book? Okay. Like you said, I talk about overcoming childhood adversity and abuse, and I lay out practical strategies that are proven and useful for the challenges that we face today. Mm-hmm. I'll find you, you went through some different abuse. I guess we'll get into this in the bio and stuff like that. And then give us a 30,000 overview of what you do on your coaching side.

I know you have a website and you help people either one-on-one or groups. Give us a bit of an overview on that. Yes. So my work revolves around empowering individuals with resilience, a growth mindset, and mindfulness so that they can boldly step in and create the life that they deserve. Through all of my work, I share the strategies that are practical and proven that we can use every day. And so I offer my book, of course. I have an online course and then one-on-one coaching. One-on-one coaching.

You've got the book. You've got the courses, and all that good stuff. Tell us a little bit about how you grew up, how you were raised, if you want, to share with us a little bit of some of your journey and the things that shaped you. Absolutely. So I spent several years of my early childhood in foster care, and I thought, I dreamed that when I reunited with my family, I would have a normal, peaceful life. Unfortunately, that was not the case. So over the next 10 years of being reunited with my biological mom, I experienced chaos, adversity, abuse. But luckily, life gave me

some sources of resilience, and I embraced a growth mindset that really helped me to overcome those challenges. And as my daughter started aging, I thought, how can I empower her with resilience? And can you develop resilience without having to go through horrible situations? And I discovered that in fact, you can, and some of those resources that I used were listed in all of these websites of how to do that. So I decided if I can teach my daughter, then I can teach other people. And so that's kind of how I got on this journey. Yeah. We need more kids with resilience because we've seen some of them growing up in today's world. And, you know, I mean mean i hate to sound like clint eastwood

to get off my lawn speech but you know i mean in my day and age we we had a lot more resilience children in fact we were we were we were what they call slouch key kids yeah we had a key to the house i don't know eight or, so we could let ourselves in. Our generation was the generation that had to run TV ads at 10 o'clock to tell everybody, hey, do you know where your kids are at right now? They had to remind parents they had children. Parents are sitting there watching, having a scotch and, I don't know, smoking a pack of Marlboros, and they're sitting there watching TV, and it's 10 o'clock and the ad comes on and they're like

Hey, honey, do we have children? Go find out where the children Is this important or they just maybe they'll just show up tomorrow or something? I don't know Yeah, and then I live in Utah where they have so many kids if one disappears then you know They don't notice for months and there's usually three more on the way they have a lot of kids here eh but so we need to teach kids resilience it seems like a lot more kids you know we've had this helicopter parenting i don't know if you get into that sort of you know addressing that and you know this parenting that seems to like you know

carrying the child through just about every adversity during childhood that doesn't shape them and then again the world they seem completely lost they're like oh my god life isn't fair uh-huh that's that's my favorite saying of wanting to slap somebody so hard across the face and they go life isn't fair yeah you should have been taught this by your dad when you were like 10 because my dad taught me. Yeah, absolutely. For sure. You know, I think one of the things I do work with with my parents is, you know, we're inundated with all these messages of fear and our kids are in so much danger. Ready or not, they're going out into the real world.

So let's prepare them for that. And then that gives us peace of mind too, to know that we've prepared our children to go out into the real world and face real world challenges. Yeah. My dad would push me down just so I'd scar my knee so that he could say, get over it. Life isn't fair. No, I'm kidding. It's just sounded funny in my head. But no, I mean, good parents will do that you know my dad did that his life isn't fair and you know mom would always nurture you go to mom and mom and you know she put a band-aid she'd hug you and hold you while you cried you know after you fell off your bike or something but you know dad would usually give you that kind of at least my dad's admire let's put that way they would they would tell you, suck it up, buttercup.

Yeah. He's crying. There's going to be more. It's coming. Life isn't fair. And being prepared for stuff like that really helped. Also, and I hate to sound like that, get off my lawn when we walk to the school and two feet of snow back and forth. But no, honestly, when I grew up,

if you fucked up in the neighborhood and pissed somebody off, they would beat you. They would bring you home to your mom. Your mom would beat you. And your mom would say, wait till your dad gets home. And then your dad would beat you. You learned lessons really quick when you were a mom. It sounds like it. Sounds like it.

But it brought a lot of accountability. One of the other things that my parents would know, I mean, it brought a lot of accountability. One of the other things that my parents would do that I was just horrific as a child. But looking back now, I'm so glad for it. Like one time I pissed off my teacher at school. I don't remember what I did, but I clearly misbehaved. And they made me call my teacher on the phone and apologize. And that was almost worse than the beatings.

But, you know, teaching me self-accountability, self-actualization, that really helped with my resilience. And of course, people don't beat their kids nowadays, unfortunately. Oh, goodness. I'm teasing! No. If I cross my fingers as a count.

So tell us some of the ways that you found that are better than beating your kids. Oh, my goodness. I have to say that one of the most important things, the very first step in developing resilience is, like you said, taking personal responsibility. So we all go through challenges and adversity. And in some situations, we have every right to be resentful. But what I ask you is, do you want to be right or do you want to be free? Once you take personal responsibility and you let go of that resentment,

then every choice you make from now on, you own it. And you get to decide how your life is going to be. So circling back to your question, like with my daughter and with my clients, it's about reminding them that we all go through challenges. We've been through challenges and just recalling that. What did you do to get through that situation? So over time, you develop a quiver of ideas and ways to overcome the challenges. And so the strategies that I share are ways that you can circle back to each time you face a new challenge. Okay, who's my community? How am I talking to myself? What are my limiting beliefs? And so there's just a list of ideas,

and you just work your way through those until you overcome that next challenge. And preparing your kids for that is really important. And do you find that, you know, the one thing about children is they blueprint off parenting. I don't think more parents really get that, understand about that, or really understand the depth of how much those blueprints their kids develop. I probably don't care because, I don't know, what did George Carlin say? 50% of people are dumber than the average person. Maybe they don't really care. Maybe they're not paying attention.

Parenting is hard. I'll give you that. And it's a challenge. But, you know, a lot of people don't have their own unresolved trauma. And they don't have their own unresolved issues. And they don't have maybe their ownresolved issues and they don't have maybe their own blueprints of how to how to be resilient stuff do you find that maybe people come to you that that's their challenge as well that the parent maybe has more issues with being resilient

than the child does and that may be the real issue absolutely and And I think that luckily the content is applicable to everyone. And so if the parent needs to work on that first, then they can go through the program, learn the steps, and then recognize it in themselves and develop it with their child. To me, the biggest thing is communication. Like when I make a mistake, I tell my daughter, you know what? I made a mistake. I'm sorry. Or you know what? I'm figuring this out too. I don't know the answers. Let's figure it out together.

So it's, you know, one thing about kids, once they reach a certain age, you are not the parent who knows everything. When they're little, they think you know everything, right? But they reach an age where they're like, wait, mom doesn't know everything. And once you admit that to your child, look, I don't have all the answers. I don't know everything, but we can figure it out. Their respect for you increases so much because they already know you don't know everything. But when you refuse to admit it, then they don't believe what you say to them.

You know, this is the same principle we use in leadership, whether it's I'm a CEO or a parent or anything else, you know, having that transparency, being, you know, showing people that you're not infallible, that you're not perfect. And there's a lot of people that put that on us as leaders and CEOs and business. Sometimes people put that in relationships where they think their partner is infallible. And then when they do the slightest misstep then you know they're out the door or something you know it's like oh my god you know you left the toilet seat up it's over you know that's sort of yeah i mean it is a heinous crime according to civil code us 5 1-3 evidently don't yeah yeah yeah it's interesting how kids and it, you know, I wrote in my book, Beacons of Leadership,

people who are, but parents are leaders, too. It's not just about the title. It's not about being CEO. I've had people say that to me. You know, I don't really manage the division, so I don't know why I should care. And you're like, no, you can be a leader within a leadership structure. Anybody can be a leader. A guy in a corner, street corner can be a leader.

There's people that are being leaders right now in the fires happening in California. It brings forth sometimes the best in us. But yeah, parents have that influence too. And my parents, they were a bit narciss they and they weren't willing to admit fallibility especially my father and it was hard because you would see right through it i remember i remember what was it was a good example we can use for this when i was young we were i was born and raised in north hollywood my parents weren't rich but they they managed some apartments so they got free rent to babysit apartments we lived two blocks blocks off of Hollywood Boulevard and I forget the other big intersection.

We lived next door to Bob Barker and we walked the dog with Bob Barker. I would sit there at two or three going, how does he get into the TV? So I lived in this world of opulence where every corner was, you know, BMWs, Mercedes, Rolls Royces. Back then you could rent Rolls Royces, these little lots. It was funny as hell. These are the beautiful old silver, whatever they're called, silver ghosts or whatever, Rolls Royces. You just rent them.

And so I lived in this opulence, but my father drove these VWs, and they were always breaking down but he loved him for three of them i think at one time and but and i would just look at him and be like this is junk and that's the stuff i see around me is really beautiful well built and and i'd say dad how come you own one of vw and and and other other people knows like why don't you own those? He was the bank on some You know, I was young so I went okay. That's my dad. He's not gonna lie to me Evidently there's something about this bank own in these expensive cars You know, you know, they can't really afford them the bank

the bank owns And he kept telling me that and then i started figuring out you know hey dad what's a bank you know i started figuring out all this bank stuff right and then eventually i figured out he had a loan on it and i wanted dad don't you you you have a loan on this vw right how is that different the guy who's got the loan on the mercedes oh shut up oh yeah he closed it off and that's when i found out that my dad was full of shit there's always that moment yeah he couldn't be human with me and infallible or and and open up to fallibility he couldn't he couldn't say to me, let me explain this to you, Chris. And, you know, he could have easily done that.

We had plenty of time in the car. I remember when this topic would come up. He had plenty of time that he could have just explained it to me instead of, I don't know, clearly he had some personal issues with people that were more successful. Yeah. And so he needed to clear them out. But, yeah, I mean, there was a perfect example, I think, of what you're saying. Yeah. Circling back to saying parenting is like leadership,

I explain to my daughter all the time about all these wonderful books I've read, some for business, some for parenting, and they're all interchangeable. You hear the same concepts in every book and you can apply them to friendships, relationships, parenting, business ownership, all of those things. It's all the same skills. So it's all useful. Yeah. Yeah. And, you know, letting your kids know you're human is fine.

I mean, that's probably one of the most important things you can ever do to let them see you fail and how you recover from it. You know, because kids are going to see you one way or another. One of the big challenges that we have with young men is they see, if they have a mother and they see her failing constantly and she doesn't have the support of masculinity, is they'll grow up seeking out other damaged women. And so they literally will see the mother struggle because she's trying to raise a family on her own. And the men, you know, they feel, they feel lack. Like I saw somebody right on Facebook the other day, they go, they go, my sons are seeing me struggle.

They see me break down all the time. I'm raising and they're trying to support me. They're crying. Oh, one of them didn't have money for christmas and they were saying that their sons were grieving because they couldn't go get jobs to raise 50 bucks to give their mom a present and it just broke my heart when i read it and then she wrote i'm raising great sons for daughters so no you're not you're actually blueprinting your sons to go find broken women to fix and they can't fix them and then they're gonna the cycle you're you're repeating the cycle is what you're doing if you understand the psychology the same goes for

mothers and daughter or fathers and daughters these blueprints that we give our kids in teaching them resilience or teaching them you know the qualities of how to survive in life are just imperative because if if they're constantly you know my father would of how to survive in life are just imperative. Absolutely. Because if they're constantly, you know, my father would do the same patterns over and over again. I won't get into what the patterns were. But he would do the same patterns over and over again. And then he would apologize.

And then he would just keep doing it. And after a while, you're just like, as children, you're just like, you're full of shit. And that's kind of like the worst place you can be with your children and your family is when your children have finally dismissed you as any sort of authority in anything and your word means nothing and at that point then you've got some real problem children and hopefully they do something better with themselves but most times you know they just go in the world and and they just replicate you really when it comes down to it you know people just don't realize how much important those blueprints are having those

blueprints as children you know the relationship they see between the mother and father or lack thereof sets a blueprint i mean i used to only date women that had the father in the home they had never been divorced and that was pretty much it. They had a good relationship with their father. And let me tell you, dating for 56 years, 35, 56 years, you can see that the difference is palpable between having a relationship, having people with healthy relationships, people who come from broken relationship, family homes, seeing the difference is palpable. And then even more, those types of homes need even more of this resilience and this mindset of fixing traumas. Because a lot of these traumas are generational.

They're just passed down from one thing to the other. I've seen that with alcoholism. I've seen that with abuse, sexual abuse. I've seen, you know, it gets passed down. The children pick up the new generational trauma that's unres decide that they want to break that cycle of abuse and break that cycle so we all have that power so it's just a matter of educating people putting the information out there and giving them the resources so at any moment you get to decide it stops with me i'm breaking that cycle of generational abuse in my family. And yeah, all those people who are coming from those broken homes and backgrounds of abuse and trauma, they can still develop resilience at any point. They can still decide that from now on, they're changing their life. So, that's the most empowering thing is it doesn't matter where you

come from, what your background is, what your history is. You get to choose from this moment on that you're changing it. One thing you talk about is cultivating self-kindness, reframing negative talk and strengthening your inner resilience. I imagine that's pretty good because, you know, if you've got the inner voices beating you up as well as the world, you know, you're, you're, you're, you're out of, you're out of team members. Absolutely. Yeah. So like community and self-talk go hand in hand, but when you come up against those limiting beliefs in that negative self-talk, it's just a really given your time to sit and ask yourself, is this true? Or is this something that I picked up from someone else?

If it was true, is it still true now? And can I change it? So it's just really having that relationship with yourself and that inner strength. But you've got to have that inner dialogue with yourself. And community really helps you because they can give you support, education, encouragement, and show you a different way to live and different resources. Yeah. And I imagine, you know, clearing one's own trauma, one's own issues can really help too, because the problem with trauma is it, is it, it colors the glasses, it colors your life, it colors your thing.

You know, you can't, it's hard to fix anyone else's shit if you don't fix your own shit oh absolutely that's the title of my new book oh you can't you you can only work on yourself and yeah for sure and and i think what i'm i'm thinking what i'm circling back to with that is your children mirror off of you whether you realize it or not so my my parents would always tell us tell the truth be honest do not lie and they would lie to us and we catch them like hey hey we just we just cut you lying there what's going on you told us that lie so either either you you're you're full of or

you're full of yeah you know absolutely kids figure this out and then and then to continue i didn't lie i told you know you're like wow okay so i i see how you work around the truth and reality so i guess that's okay for me to do it too. And yeah. And so that example, and we see this, we can flip this back to people listening that in the corporate world, you know, we see this with CEOs or companies, they'll put out this PR statement. Oh, we're a highly integrable company that really cares about our customers. And we care about our employees, by the way, we're firing 30,000 of them tomorrow and for no fault other than just to raise our stock price. And yeah, we care about our customers, especially those ones we leave on for 45 minutes on hold telling you over and over

how much we care about you. And then we're going to hang up on you as soon as someone picks up. But we care. Or you'll see the ceo you know just doing something scumbaggery and you're just like wait i thought i thought we were the ethical corporation of of the high-minded individuals and we're ripping the corporation off or you know some sort of other gaffe and you know people don't realize that that people see that people see right through the facade and the pr and my parents are lovely people but you know they were parents they fed me some pr and you know over time we went we're seeing what's going on we got this figured out absolutely you know that goes back to being honest with your children. You know, it sounds like your parents were from a generation of,

it's because I said I'm the adult, I know everything. And I imagine they did, but that doesn't work anymore, right? And my daughter recognizes this too. Just because someone is old doesn't mean that they automatically get respect. Just because you have more years

doesn't mean you learned your lessons along the way. So unless you're working on personal development, development and learning from your mistakes, you haven't aged, you haven't matured, you're just old. So you have to earn respect for sure. Just old and smelly.

That's what I get a lot from my dates. 57 and 56. I'm turning 57 and 26. I'm not sure why. Don't say you're 57 yet. Give yourself one today. I'm trying to get the shock. I'm trying to lessen the shock of saying that.

But no, I mean, you meet a lot of people, and I run huge dating groups. You meet a lot of people that they're still running the same patterns of their life and like you say just because you're old doesn't mean you learn for any lessons from your thing and that's probably why it's more important to utilize people to utilize your book and your services is if you don't identify and have an awakening of what your patterns are what you're doing and maybe what you learned is your blueprints from youth, you're going to keep doing it in your life. Like, I remember I've had two people in my group come to me with having four divorces. One came to me and she said to me, Chris, I'm having trouble, having trouble getting guys.

They keep running off after the first date. And I'm like, okay, tell me about yourself. Let's find out more about you. And she goes, I have four divorces and I'm looking to get married again. I'm like okay tell me about yourself let's find out more about you and she goes I have four divorces and I'm looking to get married again I'm like whoa you have four divorces and she says yeah and I'm like that that's it you know I mean is it I mean the more you get divorced and married the percentage of success goes down. Like, men are logical.

We know this. And, you know, if you put up four divorces in, what would it be? They were in their 50s, so 30 years. You're pounding, like, what, one every eight years or something? You know? You might want to, it might be time to sit down and look at what's causing these divorces and what your either trauma is or mental state is or whatever sort of belief systems maybe you're having you know it's time to wake up from that but it's really sad to see that where

someone has been running the same patterns for all these years and they don't ever sit down and go it could be me yeah for sure yeah and interrupt the pattern because if you don't like you say you just you just end up old and smell it you didn't say the smelly part you just end up old and smelly like me and people no wonder you're single wait i should wonder over. So on your website, let's talk a little bit about some of the offerings you have there. I'm trying to, there it is. And on michelleweb.com, Michelle with an E where the I sometimes is. Let's talk about some, you've got some free resources. You've got some products.

Flesh us out some of the stuff that you have there. Yeah, so the free resources, like I'm the type of person who I really like to get to know someone. So I watch all their YouTube videos and read all their stuff. So I provided a lot of free resources for people to get to know me and get to know what my content is about and that are useful for them to use in their life right now. So you start with the free resources and then move into the products. So I have a book and an online course. And then if you want to work with me one-on-one, then we can do coaching or parent mentoring so that we can take it to the next level. But I really feel like it's important to provide value to people and for them to get to know me

first. Definitely. And so you've got to reach out. You've got a YouTube channel, you've got Instagram, and then there's a thing I see here, the 2025 yearly planners. Yeah. So I make a planner every year. I like to put pen to paper. And so I have a yearly planner that I create every year. It's available on Amazon. So this one that I printed is really about coinciding with my book. So it's got all the steps in there of creating resilience and the growth mindset concepts as well. So that's a good resource as well. And you've got a, you've got a video on get over it. Yeah. I'm just going to send that to, I'm just going to copy and paste that to people on YouTube or on Facebook. You

know, they're, they're arguing with me about something stupid. I'm like, get over it. So we kind of talked about the power of self-talk, the power of community. Why is that important? What is that about? You know, we are creatures that need community. We need people around us. So it's important to who you surround yourself with, who's encouraging you, what they're telling you. That really affects your self-talk as well. So part of the first steps is to create that community around you. And sometimes if you are in a situation like I was growing up where I was surrounded by chaos and abuse and violence, finding a community that showed me a different way of living was super important. It was one of the first steps to say, oh, I don't have to live like this.

So yeah, it's important to have a big community. There's another model, there's another blueprint, right? Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. I think that's what's important too, because when I grew up, my only blueprint, my only model was my parents. You know, like we've talked about here.

And then as I started to see other things, I remember George Carlin was somebody who really opened my eyes that there were other people like me on the planet. Richard Pryor, I'm trying to think of some of my other early influences, but there are people that woke me up that, you know, I was being told that I was wrong and I just didn't have enough faith in whatever sort of bullshit was being served to me. And by meeting other people and seeing other blueprints that helped me get out of it and then you bring up a good point too the people you surround yourself really do shape you i mean there's a saying that i love to repeat what is it the five you're the sum of five people that around you and yeah i mean if you've got people that maybe aren't ambitious in life they just want to sit around and complain about how life isn't fair.

You know, the government does every, you know, I used to go to my ex-business partners, hang out with his family on weekends, and they were all kind of those types that were always sitting around talking about the government all weekend, you know. The government, they do this thing, and they're just always governing, and they're spending our money on stupid shit you know that sort of thing and just drinking beer after after the i don't know but i hung out with a lot because we're good friends but after the 50th time of that i was

like you know your brothers don't really want to go anywhere in life they don't learn anything they just sit around complaining about the government and prices and i don't know you know that's all they do they don't do anything about it they just that's just their it's the same like i i said to him i said you know i could go down there and i could give you play by play everything that's going to come out of everyone's mouth because they say the same thing every weekend yeah Yeah, yeah, absolutely. You're just on a loop. And I'm like, number one, I'm not learning anything new from this. And number two, it's nonproductive.

And I go, I'm sorry, I'm just not going to hang out with your family anymore. Of course, he's probably what separated us eventually. But yeah, cutting those people out of your life and then finding people who are going to help you build, finding people who are successful are really important as well. And I actually tell that to people in dating, relationships, community, you know, the people that you choose to bring into your personal life. You know, my closest friends, I look for people that have high integrity, trust, honesty, people that, you know i i feel that they're loyal etc etc i sound like i'm running some sort of cult or something i want people to drink the kool-aid

i do actually no i'm just kidding it's my audience too i want you guys all drink the kool-aid not the poison kool-aid just the good Kool-Aid with the sugar in it. But, you know, go easy on the sugar, honey. Yeah. Yeah. But, you know, the quality of those people, having people that want to go someplace with their life, who are ambitious and they have drive, that just makes all the difference in the effect of your life. Because you look at them and go, I hate them because they're doing better than I am. Not really. because you look at them and go I hate them because they're doing better than I am but yeah community makes a difference and realize that I mean and I think some people outgrow other people I think that's why people have relationships they grow I've done the same with business partners you eventually outgrow

them and you're just finally you're're just after a while, you're like, how did you ride this far with me? And you didn't learn anything. I've been over 13 years and you're still stupid. Oh my God. We've had some partners. We've had a couple of partners, eh? But so, you know, it's just one of those things.

Anything more we need to flesh out on what you do and how you do it to, so people are aware of it and can get involved in your communities? You know, you mentioned the video that I made about Get Over It. And my keynote talk is Get Over It, Proven and Practical Strategies to Overcome Challenges. But the twist on that is, you know, a lot of times people say, get over it, but they don't tell you how. So that's what I do. I'm telling people how they can get over their challenges. So if you are looking for some practical strategies, definitely connect with me.

Watch my videos. Just visit my website and get to know me. I'd love to get to know you. There's a song by the Eagles, Get Over It. I don't know if you ever heard that song, but you can play that in the background at your camp. But understanding resilience and being conscious of it's really important. I've been through some cathartic times in my life where in one case in 2008, I pretty much lost everything. And it gave me, while it was just a horrible experience, it was not fun, folks. Never do it. Thanks, 2008 recession. It was the worst thing that probably ever happened to me in my life.

It gave me a tool. And so when the 2000 crisis came and we were losing money because all the events were closing that we make a lot of money off of, it was hard. And I'm like, okay, 2008 again, here we go. And fortunately it gave me a lot of resilience skills and blueprints for surviving, you know, the next catastrophe. And so learning that early on, cause you know, especially when you're young, you're going to go through a lot of catastrophes. You're figuring out your ego, you're a teen, you're figuring out love and life and the opposite sex or the similar sex, whatever your thing is, you know, you're a teen you're figuring out love and life and the opposite sex or the similar sex

whatever your thing is you know you're trying to you know you think there's rejection and you know this and and you have you really don't have any sort of blueprints to work from yeah you know it's like sticking your hand in i don't know one of those shock things and like sometimes it'll shock you sometimes it won't you're like i don't understand how this works but having a mindset of resilience knowing how to do things i think knowing how what we've talked about knowing that it's okay to be infallible or fallible i think i don't know why i keep using the wrong words this morning but knowing that you can be fallible sometimes admitting you know i i always believe that i want to have this perfect shot through life and and there are people out there

that have a perfect you know you look at movie stars you're like oh they must they must just hit all the right balls and smacked them all out of the park and just ran a perfect game somehow how could it be like them you're like no, everyone's got challenges and it's okay to be fallible. It's okay to say, hey, I fell down. It's okay. Get back up. Get back on the horse. You know, that sort of thing.

Yeah, absolutely. So as you round out, tell people the dot coms, how they can reach out to you. I see there's a free discovery call on here and different things like that. Yeah. So again, michellewebb.com. Just be sure to spell it correctly. M E C H E L L E. And just connect with me,

get in touch. I'd love to hear from you. I'd love to meet all of you and just see how we can work with each other. They're all going to show up at your doorstep tomorrow. Oh, no, don't do that. I said all of you,

but I online. We're not, maybe make this schedule. you i said all of you but i online it's been wonderful to talk to you michelle thank you for coming on and sharing your wonderful intelligence and resources and all that good stuff yeah thank you so much for having me it was a pleasure there you go i just want to see if i could say the word intelligence without fucking it up too i think you did it you nailed it i think i did did i do all right some of those teachers gonna write in the comments on youtube hey you know what we are fallible right yeah exactly yeah that's the name of my new book coming out we are fallible what was the other title i had i forgot already yeah

i like that we are fallible. We are fallible. We can't even remember shit in this show. It's gone already. There you go. Folks, order up her book, wherever fine books are sold, called Meant for More, Overcoming Challenges to Create the Life We Deserve, out November 30th, 2024, by Michelle Webb. Thanks to my audience for tuning in.

Go to Goodreads.com, chris voss linkedin.com fortress chris voss chris voss won the tiktokity and all those crazy places on the internet be good to each other stay safe we'll see you next time and that's