The Church of Eleven22 - Marriage and Divorce - Impossible to Possible - Matthew S5E8

Episode Date: July 19, 2026

What if marriage was always meant to point to something greater than itself?  In Matthew 19, Pastor Matt Carter reveals that God's design for marriage is ultimately a picture of Christ's unbreakable ...love for His church. By looking back to God's original design in Genesis, we discover that marriage isn't simply about personal fulfillment or happiness.  It's a living testimony of the gospel, reflecting God's covenant faithfulness, sacrificial love and unwavering commitment to His people.  Whether you're single, married or have experienced the pain of divorce, this message reminds us that God's grace is greater than our failures and His design always leads to life. 📌 Supplemental Resources From This Week: • Deepen Podcast • The Faulkner's Story • This Week’s Full Service • Matthew Season 5  The Church of Eleven22® is a movement for all people to discover and deepen a relationship with Jesus Christ. Eleven22 is led by Pastor Joby Martin and based in Jacksonville, Florida, with multiple campuses throughout Jacksonville and the surrounding areas.   To support this ministry and help us continue to reach people all around the world click here.

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:04 All right. Man. Hey, let's give a hand for that. How amazing is that today? Unbelievable. Unbelievable. Love that. I want to invite you to open up your Bibles today to the book of Matthew
Starting point is 00:00:17 Chapter 19, verse 3. Matthew chapter 19, verse 3. We'll get there in just a minute. My name is Matt. It's honored to be here today. About a year ago, I got a calendar invite from Pastor Jobi to preach on July the 19th. And so I do what I always do. I open up the Bible and looked at the scripture to see what it is that he wanted me to preach on.
Starting point is 00:00:41 And the first thing I did was sigh deeply because I realized that Pastor Jobi had asked me to preach on what, in my opinion, is the single, solitary, most difficult subject to preach on in the gospel of Matthew. And that is the subject of divorce. but then I laughed because it hit me that if I were the lead pastor, I would have done the exact same thing that he did. You know, my wife asked me, hey, babe, when do you want to go on vacation? I asked, when are we in Matthew on the subject of divorce? July 19th, make the back of God do it. That's exactly what I do.
Starting point is 00:01:26 Why? It's an emotionally heavy, difficult subject. A lot of folks in the room have gone through a divorce. There's folks considering right now going through a divorce. And even more of us, in some shape, form or fashion, have been impacted by divorce. And so I want you to understand something. It's a painful subject,
Starting point is 00:01:48 and I want you to know that I get that. And we're going to approach it today very pastoral. But on the other hand, it's also an intellectually difficult subject. Church, I've been doing this a minute, and I'm just telling you, if you study this subject deeply and you really look at the Word of God and uncover every rock, you're going to define, you're going to realize something that the subject of divorce, when you can get divorce, under what circumstance you can divorce, like, it's not near as clear cut as some people make it out to be. Now, Pastor Joby and I, we talk about this at length in the Deepen podcast.
Starting point is 00:02:30 We uncover a lot of those rocks. We talk about a lot of those subjects and we go deeper. But I just want you to understand today that as I go through this, there are a lot of really good theologians that are a lot smarter than me and a lot smarter than you that completely disagree on this subject. So why am I telling you this? One, just I want to beg you today to give me grace as we walk through this together. Hang with me to the end. Hang with me to the end, you're going to learn something. And I hope you've already learned it, but if you haven't, you're going to learn something that God loves you today more than your wildest imagination.
Starting point is 00:03:05 And that your greatest failure in your life does not define you. That's what we're going to see today. But here's what we're going to do. Here's what we're going to focus on. We're going to spend the majority of our time talking about two things. Number one, we're going to look at God's view of marriage. If there's anything you walk out of here today, I want you above everything else, whether you're single, whether you're married, whether you're divorced, whatever.
Starting point is 00:03:34 I want you walking out of here today with a higher view of marriage than you ever have before because one of the things you're going to realize is that God's view of marriage is infinitely higher than our wildest imagination. And then in light of God's view of marriage, we're going to look at his view of divorce. Okay, because those two things, how God's views marriage and how God views divorce, those things are not debatable in the scripture. At the end of the day, it doesn't matter what the word of God says. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt when it comes to 1122, when it comes to this church,
Starting point is 00:04:13 we stand on the inerrant, infallible word of Almighty God. And so it doesn't matter what the Lord says to us today. We're going to apply our lives based on what he says. Amen? All right, let's jump in. Matthew chapter 19, verse 3. The Pharisees walk up to Jesus and they ask him a question on the subject of divorce. We find out that they're testing him, and I'll tell you why in just a second, but let's read this, Matthew 19.3.
Starting point is 00:04:42 The Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking, is it lawful to divorce one's wife for any cause? Okay? disciples come up to Jesus and they ask him a question, Jesus, is it okay for us to divorce our wives for any reason? Scripture said they were testing him. It hit me. I didn't know why they were testing him, so I looked it up, and here's what I found out in my study,
Starting point is 00:05:13 is that there was a huge debate at the time between the two top rabbinical schools of, you know, the Jewish culture there. There's like two main guys. Two main rabbis, two main teachers. The first one was the Hillel rabbinical school. And here was the Hillel rabbinical school of thought. That you could divorce your wife for any reason whatsoever. She burned dinner.
Starting point is 00:05:41 Got in a bad argument. She wasn't meeting your needs. She roots for Alabama. It doesn't matter. You can kick her to the curb. That was what old rabbi Hillel thought. Then there was a Shemiah. rabbinical school of thought, and they took what is a far more biblical view, which is that
Starting point is 00:06:01 the only reason that you can divorce your wife was because of, like, sexual immorality, like gross abandonment, that sort of thing. And so hear this, check it out. So when they ask Jesus, is it lawful to divorce your wife for any cause? They're doing two things. Number one, listen, they want to know what side he's on. And number two, they're really wanting to get to the bottom of what is the minimum requirement for me to end the marriage? What's the minimum requirement for me to end a marriage?
Starting point is 00:06:38 And instead of answering their question directly, Jesus takes them back to Genesis chapter one and two, and he has a Bible study with them on God's intended design and purpose of marriage. And so that's what we're going to do. We're going to look at God's design and his purpose of marriage. And again, what he showed them and what we're about to see is that God's view of marriage is infinitely higher than we can possibly imagine. Read verse 3 again.
Starting point is 00:07:08 The Pharisees came to him, testing him, by asking, is it lawful to divorce one's wife for any cause? And then watch what Jesus says in verse 4. And I love this. This is awesome. I love it when Jesus does this. He answered, have you not read? In other words, do you guys not read the Bible?
Starting point is 00:07:27 It's a legitimate question. Why are you asking me if a guy couldn't get divorced from his wife for any reason? Because I don't know if you need to, have you read the Bible? He says, have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female? And then he said to them, therefore, man should leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife and the two shall become one flesh. Now there's a couple of really important things that God just said, or rather Jesus just said about who is God, about marriage that we need to remember and we need to know. Number one, here's kind of the first thing that Jesus said about God's view of marriage is that he is reminding the Pharisees that God is the inventor of marriage.
Starting point is 00:08:21 it's actually very important that we remember that. That God invented marriage. So important you remember. Hey y'all, man did not invent marriage. Man didn't think marriage up. It was not man's idea to get married. I mean, seriously, Adam wasn't walking around, you know, one day. I'm like, man, Eve, she's pretty cool.
Starting point is 00:08:48 So here's what I'll do. I'm going to create and then enter into a legal moral. and spiritual, lifelong binding, unbreakable covenant with her and God, and let's call it marriage. He didn't come up with that. He didn't come up with it at all. It was God who invented marriage. Now, here's the other thing Jesus said, and this is even maybe more important. Because God is the inventor of marriage, we learned that God designed marriage.
Starting point is 00:09:18 God's the designer of marriage. He's the architect of marriage. He came up with the blueprint. for marriage. Matthew 19, 4. Jesus answered, have you not read? He who created them, he's
Starting point is 00:09:33 the inventor, he who created them from the beginning, and here's how he designed it, he made them male and female, in verse 5, and said, watch this, here's the design. Therefore, a man
Starting point is 00:09:47 shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife. Everybody's chuckle the word hold fast. This is the first thing that Jesus talks about on God's intended design of marriage. He said the first thing you understand about the way God designed marriage is that there is a physical. There's a physical binding that occurs when you stand at the altar.
Starting point is 00:10:16 There's like a physical bonding. That word hold fast right there. In the original language in Hebrew, it means to submit together. Cement. It's literally the strongest language that exist in that language about binding something together in a permanent way. I recently found this out. There's a bunch of Navy folks that live in this town, and I love it. And one of the Navy folks that is in the Navy came and told me this after the service,
Starting point is 00:10:50 like Pastor Matt, that word hold fast is a naval term. That when the storms are coming, when you're on a boat back in the day and the storms are coming and it's getting nasty and you're in fear for your life that you're about to get thrown overboard or cast overboard, you grab hold of something. And it doesn't matter how much the wind blows, how much the rain comes, you hold fast and you never let go. That's what Jesus just said. God designed marriage. A man leaves his father and mother and he holds fast no matter what to his wife. Now listen, I'm just telling you what Jesus says. Amen? Hold fast.
Starting point is 00:11:36 He said, God designed this thing in such a way that a man lives by and a mother and cements together in an unbreakable way. That's why we say our vows. I've done five, six hundred weddings in my day. They stand there. You talk about them for a while, tell the girl how pretty she is and, you know, how lucky the guy is to be there with her. And then you look at him and have him face each other and hold hands. And I'm like, all right, repeat after me. Do you look at the guy?
Starting point is 00:12:04 I'm like, do you knucklehead take her to be your wedded wife to having to hold? And this day forward for better or for worse, for richer or for poor. In sickness and in health, forsaking all others. keeping yourself only for her as long as you both shall live. You say, I do. Okay? That's a commitment to physically cementing to one another. But then Jesus drops a bomb on them and reminds them that God's design for marriage was not just to be some sort of physical binding together.
Starting point is 00:12:47 Listen carefully. listen carefully. But at the moment that you walk down the aisle and you stand at the altar, that there is a spiritual and a supernatural binding that is occurring at that moment. And if you don't hear anything I say today, you need to hear this. Look at verse 5. And Jesus said, therefore, a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife.
Starting point is 00:13:19 Watch what he says. And the two shall become one. Now listen, I'm not great at math. As a matter of fact, I stink at math. I remember the day that the cheese like slid off the math cracker. It was in the fifth grade. Long division. I've struggled ever since.
Starting point is 00:13:43 But here's the thing. Here's what I do know. One plus one equals. equals two. Amen? And yet God, he's like, here's what's going to happen. One plus one is going to equal one. So how does one plus one equal one? The only explanation is that God takes two people and he transforms you into something brand new. He takes the two of you and he binds you together where you're no longer two, but Jesus said you become one. That word become right there? Here's what it means.
Starting point is 00:14:24 It means something that's created from scratch. It means something that comes into being that did not exist before. He said at the moment of your marriage, you come together, you say your vows, and then God does something supernatural. He joins the two of you together into something brand new. I was looking for an illustration to try to get our brains around that, because we've heard that our whole lives, but I wanted to give you a visual illustration.
Starting point is 00:14:58 And so I found this, by the way, up there in the top right, that's where the Steelers play football. This is the two rivers on the left and the right. I had to look it up, and I'm going to slaughter the words. Please forgive me if you're like from this area. But it's like the Managahela, I think. Is that not it? Did I get it?
Starting point is 00:15:20 I studied over the weekend. All right. To the left, Managahela. on the left, now on the right is the Allegheny River. And what happens is right there at the stadium, the two become one river. You can see it that from there until it ends, wherever it ends, it's a new river. Now, what they didn't do is call that new river where the two became one. They didn't call it the Managahela, Allegheny River.
Starting point is 00:15:52 It's got a new name. It's called the Ohio. river. That's exactly what happens at your marriage. Is that you come together, you say your vows, you exchange rings, and then God, not you, God takes the two of you, and he forms you into something brand new. It is a supernatural joining together. Church, listen, and it is God the one, it is God. He's the one who joined you. Watch this. Check it out.
Starting point is 00:16:29 Matthew 196. Jesus says, so. They are no longer two but one flesh. Watch what he says. Therefore, as a result of the fact that you cemented to your wife and now that God has taken you and turned you into two, he says, therefore, watch this, what God has joined together.
Starting point is 00:17:09 Church, who joins you together? That's so important. What Jesus tells us about the design of marriage is that the pastor did not join the two of you together. That the justice of the peace or the guy in the Elvis suit, he didn't join you together. Maybe more importantly to remember the two of you did not join the two of you together. What Jesus said is that when you come together at the altar, it is God that turns you into a brand new creation.
Starting point is 00:17:46 And then watch what he says next, because he's finally going to answer their question, can a man divorce his wife for any cause? Matthew 196. So they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let not man separate. He answered their question. That's the answer to the question. Jesus, can a man divorce his wife for any cause? Takes him back to Genesis.
Starting point is 00:18:35 reminds the design of marriage. Man shall leave his father and mother cleaved to his wife. The two shall become one flesh. Therefore, what God joined together, man does not break apart. And guess what, man? The disciples were stunned when he said that. They grew up their whole lives. Probably, I don't know, it doesn't say.
Starting point is 00:19:04 Half of them were hanging, you know, they were kind of in the halel school. kind of hoping that they could divorce their wife for any reason. Some of them were in the Shemai school, a little more conservative. But then Jesus answers the Pharisees question. They'll say, what, God joined together, you don't break apart. And they were stunned. Their mouths dropped open. And one of them, I can't remember up my head.
Starting point is 00:19:25 One of them looks at Jesus, probably Peter. One of them looks at Jesus. And he said, well, if that's the case that what God joined together, we can't break apart, If that's the case, it's better not to get married. And you would think that Jesus would be going out like, oh, no, don't take it that far. You would think Jesus would say, no, no, for real. Like marriage is very difficult. It's going to be hard, but it's really important.
Starting point is 00:19:52 And so, you know, go out there and try to get married and just realize it's a big deal to God. That's not what he says. When the disciples said, man, if that's the case that God views marriage in that big of a way, it's better not to get married. And Jesus goes, you're right. Our view of marriage church is way too small. Jesus had an infinitely high view of marriage. And you begin to understand why,
Starting point is 00:20:34 when you begin to understand God's intended purpose for marriage. When you understand why, like what's the purpose of why God created marriage, then it starts making all the sense in the world why Jesus would say what God joins together, you don't break apart. Because church, what is the purpose? And there's several purposes of marriage,
Starting point is 00:20:58 but what's the primary purpose? The primary purpose of marriage. So we're about to find out here in Ephesians 5. Fast forward to the New Testament, we find out that God has this really massive, big infinitely high purpose of marriage. You know, in the Old Testament, we discover that one of the reasons God invented marriage because he didn't want Adam to be alone.
Starting point is 00:21:23 And that is a huge purpose of marriage, so that we're not alone. We know that God created marriage. One of the primary purposes of marriage was that man and woman would repopulate the earth with the bears of God's image. But again, fast forward to the New Testament, Ephesians 5, and Paul drops a theological nuclear bomb on us when he reveals God's intended primary purpose for marriage. Let's read it. You know, if y'all remember, he talks about, you know, wives submit to your husbands as the church submits to Christ. He says, husbands, love your wives. As Christ loved the church.
Starting point is 00:22:03 And then he takes them back to Genesis in the beginning, reminds him of what God said about how he designed marriage. Look at verse 31. Paul said, therefore, he quotes Jesus, quotes Genesis, therefore a man shall leave his father and mother, hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh, and then he says something crazy in verse 32. He says, this mystery is profound. Why does he say this mystery? Why does he call marriage a mystery?
Starting point is 00:22:36 Anytime you see the word mystery in the Bible, check it out. It means something that has previously been hidden, but is now being revealed. And so he, Paul literally says, hey, when God said cleave to your wife, the two shall become one flesh. Paul says at the end of the day, that was a mystery. The purpose of marriage has always been a mystery. It's about to be revealed. In verse 32, watch what it says. Paul says, the mystery is profound.
Starting point is 00:23:11 I was saying, I am saying that it, marriage refers. to Christ and the church. There it is. There it is. Why does God have such an infinitely huge view of marriage? Why did Jesus say what God joined together, you don't break it apart? Here's why. Because what the Holy Spirit inspired word of God just told us is that the primary and ultimate reason God created marriage was for the two of you when you get married
Starting point is 00:23:48 in that moment, you become a physical representation to the world of Jesus Christ, relationship to his bride, the church. Did you know that? That the number one reason God created marriage was not for your happiness, even though if you walk in God's plan, you will experience happiness. Scripture is saying that the number one reason God created marriage is not for your companionship, even though you will experience companionship. But what the Holy Spirit inspired and fallible, word of God just said, is that the number one reason,
Starting point is 00:24:28 and it's profound that God designed marriage the way he did, which is for a man and a woman to cement themselves together and a lifelong, never-ending one flesh union that you never break apart is because your marriage is a living, breathing picture of Jesus Christ, cementing, binding, unbreakable, never-ending, eternity-long love and devotion for his bribe the church that can never, ever, ever, be broken. We put it this way. Your picture is meant to be a sermon. And the sermon's thesis is not you, it's Jesus.
Starting point is 00:25:15 And as a matter of fact, your marriage and my marriage, it's meant to be a physical display of one of the greatest promises God ever gave you and me. Y'all ready for it? Our marriage, according to the Word of God, is a display to the world. One of the greatest promises God ever gave us. You ready for it?
Starting point is 00:25:33 Here it is. It's in Romans 835. Don't turn there. Just watch. Paul asked an important question. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? He's asking a really important question. Can you and I be separated from the love of Christ?
Starting point is 00:25:55 shall tribulation, stress, persecution, famine, nakedness, danger, or sort. And then in verse 38, let's go. He says, for I am sure of something. Here's what he says, I'm sure of, that neither death nor life,
Starting point is 00:26:14 nor angels, nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor debt, nor anything else in all of creation will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. That's good news, y'all. Men and women of God, that is what your marriage is a picture of. Listen, God did not invent marriage to give you and your spouse a way to demonstrate your love for one another. God primarily invented marriage to give you
Starting point is 00:26:55 and your spouse a way to demonstrate the gospel to the world. And as a result, and as a result, result, I promise you, you will love one another because Jesus loves us. I only have a little light moment here, how much time I got. All right, I'm going to tell you a little quick, funny story. You're getting a little serious here. But it's always funny. I've done, again, so many marriages. And one of the things I love to do, I always mess with the groom because they're fun to
Starting point is 00:27:22 mess with. And, you know how the pastor and the groomsmen kind of come out first, and they'll be in the back on the side door. and they're always messing around back there or whatever. And I always grab the groom and say, come here, because we're about to go out, man. It's like 30 seconds. We're about to go out and I'll look at him.
Starting point is 00:27:41 And I say, hey, man, you're about to walk out those doors and you're about to say I do. Change vows and rings say I do. And then in that moment, you're going to walk out the door and for the rest of your life, your job is to love that woman like Christ love the church and the two of you are going to become a living, breathing picture of Christ, unbreakable, never-eastern.
Starting point is 00:28:01 ending love for his bride the church, are you afraid? And he always goes, nah, no, I got this man, let's go, you know, he's all fired out. And I always chuckled because I think I've told Joe this before. I remember the scene from Star Wars where Luke Skywalker's about to go fight Darth Vader and he doesn't know his dad yet. He just knows he's got to go fight him. He's about to be in the fight of his life. And Yota shakes his stick at him and goes, are you afraid? And Luke's like, I'm ready, let's go. Yoder goes, you will be. He's like, when it hits you, what you're about to go do?
Starting point is 00:28:45 When you're standing there face-to-face with Darth Vader and that red light saber, you're going to be afraid. And I look at that kid, I'm like, you're going to be. Like, you're going to go out there and it's going to hit you. You don't know what you're doing, but you've got to stay in there and fight for that thing. I don't do that. I do yell at him, but I don't do that. I'm just like, help him, Jesus.
Starting point is 00:29:05 And we go through the marriage. church your calling from the moment you walk down the aisle and say I do until the moment that you lay your spouse into the arms of Jesus is displayed to the world the never-ending unbreakable love of Christ for his bride the church and so let me ask you a question in light of how God designed and created marriage and the purpose of marriage how do you think God views divorce now listen this is going to get intense for a second not because of what I say but because of what God says hang with me. Okay, hang with me. In light of what marriage represents, how do you think God views divorce? Well, he tells us in Malachi 2.13, listen. This is the Lord speaking through Malachi and says this. And he's speaking, by the way, oh goodness, he's speaking to the men of God. He's speaking to the men of Israel, God's men. He says, this is another thing you do. You cover the altar of the Lord with tears with weeping and sighing because he no longer gives attention
Starting point is 00:30:24 to the offering or accepts it with favor from your hand. And he's like, hey, listen, man, you're trying to bring these offerings to God, but he's not even paying attention to him. Verse 14. So you say, for what reason? And God says, because the Lord has been a witness between you and the wife of your youth, against whom you have dealt treacherously. though she is your marriage companion and your wife by covenant.
Starting point is 00:30:55 But not one has done so who has a remnant of the spirit. God just said, he goes, in other words, you don't treat the wife of your youth and the wife of your covenant with God treacherously if you have the spirit of God. But not one has done so as a remnant of the spirit. And why the one, he was seeking a godly offspring. Be careful then about your spirit. You see that none of you deals treacherously against the wife of your youth.
Starting point is 00:31:25 And here it is. verse 16, God says, for I hate divorce, says the Lord, the God of Israel. How you feel about it, God? He says, I hate it. It's fascinating to me that God does not say, you know, I've got a problem with divorce. He doesn't say, I advise against divorce. He doesn't say divorce is really bad, and there are definitely better options for it. God says, I hate it.
Starting point is 00:31:52 And you look up the word hate, hate, and you realize something that the only time God ever says he hates something is when it's his sworn enemy. And so literally the Lord, not me, but the Lord just said that divorce is my enemy. Church, why would God say that he hates divorce and divorces his enemy? Listen carefully. Because when a man and woman walk down an aisle and they say their vows, and God joins them together and the two become one flesh, and they become a living, breathing picture of God's never-ending unbreakable love for his bride to church.
Starting point is 00:32:31 when the couple breaks that bond and they end that covenant that also sends a message to the world what message does that send divorce sends a message to the world that God's covenant love for us can be broken and what have we learned is that God's covenant love for us cannot be broken
Starting point is 00:32:54 divorce sends a message to the world that God loves you until things get really difficult and hard and then he break it up. But we just learned that God will never leave us and he will never forsake us and nothing can ever separate us from his love. And so when we break apart the picture of his love, he said that right there, that's my enemy.
Starting point is 00:33:26 I'm going to land the plane here. We just have a few more minutes and we're going to apply this. Now listen carefully. Here's the end hang with me. Listen, divorce folks. If you're in here, I want you to hear something very, very clearly. Many of you, divorce was not your fault. You were abused.
Starting point is 00:33:42 You were abandoned. There's a lot of reasons we get into that stuff in the podcast. But, you know, you were in many ways realistically a victim of divorce. And there are many of us here that you played a big role in it. Here's what I want you to hear today. Because you've heard me on how God views divorce. Here's what I want you to hear. is that even though God hates divorce, divorce is not the unforgivable sin in Scripture.
Starting point is 00:34:13 It's not. The scripture is crystal clear that there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Listen, hear that. We're going to apply this in a second, but he's like neither height nor death, nor angels, nor demons, nor any other thing in all of the world in that, last time I checked, includes divorce, can separate you from the love of God in Christ Jesus. A few weeks ago, I taught on the calling of Matthew. And we learned that before Jesus called him to himself,
Starting point is 00:34:47 it says he saw him, which I taught you means that Jesus knew everything about his life before he called him. Jesus knew everything you would ever do, and he still called you to himself anyway. Listen, so what's your job? What's your calling? If you've been divorced, maybe you're remarried, whatever it is, here's what you do. You do not walk out of here in shame.
Starting point is 00:35:12 You walk out of here knowing that you are a beloved child of God, and you spend the rest of your life living out God's intended design and purpose for marriage. That's what you do. Non-married people. Woo! Y'all better, I don't have got to put your seat on. You ready? Non-married people. Y'all listen.
Starting point is 00:35:33 Listen, y'all. Number one job is that you make sure you hold God's view of marriage. That's number one job. Number two job is you do not get married until you find somebody that holds God's view of marriage. You don't do it. You don't do it. No matter what. Single women, let me talk to you.
Starting point is 00:35:58 I don't care what that dude looks like. I don't care if he looks like like a 26-year-old Brad Pitt. Got biceps like Pastor Jobi Martin. Works for a venture capital firm. drives a Lamborghini, if that man does not love Jesus, you do not marry him. Be the biggest mistake you ever make in your life. You do not follow a man that is not going to lead you to the person of Christ Jesus. Men, listen, I'm going to say something that some of y'all are going to get mad at me at,
Starting point is 00:36:34 but I just want you to know, I didn't come up with the quote. Tommy Nelson. There's a pastor of Denton Bible back in the day when Pastor Jovi and I were young guys. And did my glasses fall off the thing here? They're on the floor. I don't see him. There we go. I think I got it memorized from here on out.
Starting point is 00:36:53 Tommy Nelson, so if you get mad at this quote, you can email him. I think he's still alive. He said this. He said, young men, he said, you never marry a girl that doesn't love Jesus. He said, if you marry a girl that does not love Jesus, it's like marrying a little piece of hell right here on me. earth. Can I just tell you all that outside of my salvation and my, I would say outside of my salvation, the single greatest gift God has ever given me. It's bringing me a woman that loves Jesus
Starting point is 00:37:40 more than she loves me. And I would not have it any other way because there are some times where I was not easy to love and she stuck with me because she loved that man. name Jesus Christ. Married folks in the room that are struggling, considering divorce. Can I just remind you of something? That if you're not believers, if you are not been given the gift of salvation and become a child of God, that's your step. That's how real life change happens. That's where you have access to the power to change, is when God makes you a brand new creation in Christ Jesus has your sins forgiven. But if you're Christians, can I just tell you something? I want to remind you of something today if you're Christians and your marriage is struggling.
Starting point is 00:38:35 If both of your believers and both of you have the Holy Spirit, you are never without hope. You're never without hope if both of you have the Holy Spirit. You know why? I'm living proof. I've seen it. Y'all, I've told you this several times. There was a season. Jennifer and I were not doing well. We were not okay. And we still. stuck it out, and we fought for our marriage, and we fought for one another at first because Jesus called us to, and we knew what marriage represented. And that got us through long enough, something crazy happened. God started being true to His Word, that our God is able to do exceedingly and abundantly
Starting point is 00:39:20 more all than we can ask or think according to the power at work in us. And the Holy Spirit started changing me, and I started looking more like Christ, and the Holy Spirit started changing her, and she started looking more like Christ, and you wake up one day, several years later, and can I just tell you that we are more in love, and there is more peace and joy and hope than we have ever experienced in our lives? Listen, you never give up. There is a, listen, there's a beauty on the other side of the storm that you can only experience by holding fast through the storm. So hold fast. Final group, real, real, real. fast. Matt, what if my spouse won't quit cheating him? Jesus addresses that there's some evidence
Starting point is 00:40:23 that you free from the bond, but I would say this, that's not where you camp out. You camp out on God's view of marriage and then let that inform that first. I would tell you what I would do in that situation, and I would have pursued my life no matter what. Now, listen, I know there's situations, you need to get out. So I want you to hear that. We do what we do with abuse all that. I'm talking about that. I'm talking about a serial adulterer. I personally would pursue her, and I'd keep pursuing her until she got remarried. Why? Because of the book of Josea. The book of Josea is a story in the Old Testament of God coming to a man named Josea and saying, Josea, see that prostitute over there? I want you to go marry her. He's like, what? Yeah, go
Starting point is 00:41:23 marry the prostitute. Okay, God. He marries her, and then something crazy happens, she leaves him, cheats on him. God says, Josea go after. Okay, God, he goes after. And it's this series of where she keeps running, she keeps cheating. And God keeps saying, Josea, go after, love her, win her heart back. and you ask yourself the question, why in the world is the book of Hosea in the Bible? And it's a really simple answer to the question. Because Hosea represents someone. Josea represents Jesus.
Starting point is 00:42:18 And guess who the prostitute represents? I cannot tell you how many times I have cheated on Jesus. I cannot tell you how many times I've run away. and y'all he never let me go let's go let's go out those doors today and let's display that let's pray father i thank you for your word um i'm i'm so undone by this truth one that you would come after me and pursue me despite how often i've run away and cheated and turn my back on you thank you jesus Two, I thank you for saving my marriage. And three, Lord, if there is anyone in this room, Father, that is thinking about walking away,
Starting point is 00:43:34 I pray that they would turn their eyes to the cross, and they would see a bloody Savior that says, I love you this much, and I'll never let you go. Father, I pray for this church and the marriages in the church, the future marriages in this church, that we would live out every single day of our lives, that we would be a beautiful picture to this world out those doors of your love for us. And I ask that today, in Jesus' name. Amen. Amen.
Starting point is 00:44:06 Church, let's stand together. Here's how we're going to respond today. Number one is if you're a married couple here and God has healed you and you've seen the reality of this truth, I want you to worship your face off right now. I want you and your husband and your wife to like worship the Lord together and just cry out the top of your lungs like God, you are good. You're a good, good father. You are good to me. Single folks, folks that are single. You're not married yet. Odds are, many of you, most of you will. Man, I think an amazing thing to do as just a symbol of surrender to come down here,
Starting point is 00:44:51 get on your knees, and I want you to pray for your future spouse. Pray that God would write his name on their heart right now. There's anybody here, that's, man, you've either walked away or you're thinking about walking away, and you heard today how God views it, man, maybe you need to come forward and you need to just bow the need of Jesus and say, Jesus, I don't know how to do this. This hurts so bad, but I want to present the world, your love, give me the strength. If you're in a place where your marriage is struggling, men, you grab hold of that woman's arm, and you, don't grab hold her arm, hold her hand, and then walk her down, and y'all pray together, and I just think the Lord thinks that's really
Starting point is 00:45:36 beautiful. Father, we love you. I pray that you would be honored and glorified today in who we are and what we do. And as we sing to you, I pray there would be a sweet sound in your ears. And I ask that in Jesus' name. Amen. Amen.

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