The Church of Eleven22 - Singleness - Guest Pastor Ryan Kwon

Episode Date: January 17, 2021

Oh my goodness. How are you, 1122? I missed you. I missed you so much. Please have a seat because it's really awkward. All right. So, listen, I just celebrated this week my 50th birthday. Could you believe that?

50th. I'm 50 years old. Some of you might not know, but Asians don't raisin. You know that, right? So, yeah, I celebrated 50th, and I got to celebrate here. There's no other church in the... this planet, I'm telling you, including mine, that would actually throw a birthday party for me like 1122 did.

This weekend, I landed, and you guys actually threw me a birthday party, which was insane. You know who throws birthday parties? Families do. And I feel like I'm part of your family. I feel like this is kind of like a homecoming for me and that you've sent me to the West for mission work. Now I'm coming back here to rest and to be loved on, and I feel so great. grateful to be here. Listen, I just have to say something about your lead pastor because, I mean,

basically, there are two things that simply does not happen, that a redneck and an Asian guy become best friends. That just never happens in this world, but somehow it has happened. That's why I believe in the resurrection. And so that has happened. And can I just share with you briefly something about your pastor? Your pastor is the best preacher I know, and I know a lot of preachers. Yes, yes. But that's not the most worthy thing to be celebrated. My favorite part of who Pastor Jobi is, is that he could, he is a wanted man. He could be in very many places, but there's no greater place than him being with you. He wants to love you. He wants to grow you. He wants to disciple you. He wants to teach you. He wants to teach you. And so there's no other

place, even though he has a ton of opportunities, than to be with you because he loves you. And most proud of that. I hope you could celebrate that too. Now listen, it is so fantastic to be here in a live audience because, you know, I'm from California. Everything's shut down. Right. COVID is shut everything down. My church is only meeting online. And so to hear your singing, to hear your praises, to see that you are real people. It blesses my heart. I mean, it blesses me. And for our online folks that are catching us here, I'm so glad that you're worshiping with us. But if you're able and it's incredible that you will make your way back to this church because so much of ministry of the Christian kind is a presence ministry that we're called to be a body of Christ.

And so I say it all the time, even in my neck of the woods, COVID is absolutely real. But so is all the despondency from isolation, depression, spiritual illness, and lots of other things that are happening, including abuse. So would you come back? And I would encourage you highly to join us and sing together. Yeah. Hey, all right, you're a live crowd. Get your Bibles. I hope you have one. Turn to Hebrews chapter 12 versus 3 through 13. And I'm just going to guide you through this text. And this might be initially a familiar text. And I think I'm going to teach you and I'm going to present to you something that you might not be as familiar with. And I've been asked to encourage the singles in particular. And let me just. tell you up front, I have a huge heart for the single adult. Why? I have some street credit. First,

I was a single adult pastor before I planted Resonet Church. So I have a huge heart. But secondly, I have some massive street credit because I was a single adult for a very, very long time. In fact, the story goes like this. I was brought up in an atheist home. And until college, my senior year, that's when I met Christ. And I started reading his word and met my very first Christians in my life. And I quickly learned a couple things. Number one, you're not supposed to be dating a non-Christian that you are unequally yoked. The very first thing I did was I actually broke up with my non-Christian girlfriend at the time. But the second thing I did is I actually made a deal with God. I said, God, if I, for the next three years, go completely celibate. I mean, not the kind of

celibate that you guys celebrate, but I mean Puritan celibate, meaning no dating, no talking to girls, no calling girls, I mean running away from girls for three years. I said, Lord, if I do that and learn about my manhood, learn about a singular devotion to the Lord, learn about the things that you're learning in this series, I said, would you, Lord, after those three long, hard years? bless me with the hot life. That's what I said. Who's a Christian? That's what I said.

I'm like, would you bless me with the hot wife? So I was so faithful, man. I did not call, I did not hang out. Not a single date in three years. And after the, those were the hardest years of my life. Hardest years. And after those three years, I thought, Lord, now it's time. Let it rain.

Hallelujah. I mean, I thought it was going to come. Guess what happened? Silence. Oh, so you want me to go fourth year? So I went four. Those four years turned five. No dating, no call. Six years. Seven years. Eight point five years of nothingness. I mean, you have to understand I'm an overachiever. You know, I'm three on the enneagram, right? After all, come on, I'm not a Bishian. I'm not a Cian. I'm an Asian. Now if you didn't get that, you were probably a Dishan in high school, so that's okay. But listen, the Bible says that singles, that season is a blessed season. In fact, Apostle Paul says in 1st Corinthians 7 that I wish you were all single as I am because the time is so short. An unmarried person is devoted to the Lord. But a married person is to his wife. And so it says, use this time to singularly devote yourselves to the Lord is what he says in verse 7. And so he says, the Bible continues to say that singleness is incredibly a blessed season. But let's just be honest here. Straight talk. Singles, it doesn't feel like a blessing, does it?

It feels rather like a curse. I suppose that some of you have gone home in the holidays and somebody's asked you, are you dating someone yet? Are you seeing someone? It's a thinly veiled accusation of your life, right? Or your mom coming up to you and saying, you know what? I'm not getting any younger, you know, and I want to be able to still hold my grandbabies. So what's going on? Or that faithful, married couple of yours that come alongside you and say,

I just want you to know that I'm praying for you, you know, and that you find that special person in your life, you know, that person? Right? That's not bad for Californian. Okay, Kimberly Price, she wrote for the relevant magazine and she wrote this. It's no wonder that we single struggle to maintain a sense of joy and empowerment in our singleness when everyone around us seems to be praying against it, as if we had some rare form of terminal cancer. Singles, I sympathize with you. And what I want to tell you this morning is that you don't have cancer. that there's nothing wrong with you.

And yet you're prone to believing in lies. Lies that say, I could only be complete if I'm married. No, that's the job of Jesus Christ. He has completed you already. That you have to believe that there's nothing wrong with you because that's what you're believing. A lot of the women in this place. There's something wrong with me.

Or you say, God is mad at me. Or God is withholding something for me. And so what I want you to believe tonight, this morning, and for the rest of you is that what you believe about yourself, your status, your circumstance today, are not nearly as important as what you believe about God. In fact, this is very important for us to understand because in the sense all of our problems that you are experiencing today

comes from not seeing God as he truly is for that moment. In fact, all of our bitterness and fear and hopeless despair, putting in all of our destructive emotion, we have stemmed from not believing in God right at the moment in the right way. In fact, A.W. Tozer says this. He says, what comes to our minds when we think about God

is the most important thing about us. And if that's true, then I have one thing that I want to communicate to you for the remainder of our time. And I hope you leave this place with this one central truth. Ready? God is a good dad.

Our God is a good, good dad. He's really good. Now, this passage that we're about to study is actually about enduring hardship. In fact, the whole entire book of Hebrews was written to Christians who just had become Christians. And they thought becoming Christian would solve all of their problems. And they had to learn it the hard way. They were enduring a ton of hardship. And that's why chapter 12 is written.

And now singles, you can relate because singleness is hard. But not just the singles here, but all of us could relate if you are not foreign to the idea of hardship. Now, just show up hands. Raise your hand if you know anybody who's enduring hardship, even if that's you. Raise your hand. I mean, everybody's hand should go up, right? Because we know what hardship is like. And therefore, this message will apply to you.

Now, the word endure here is scattered all over in this section. that is the Greek word hypomeno, which means to be hyperstanding. To hyperstand, no matter what kind of resistance or gale force wind that you are taking on, you're not going to tip over. You're going to be able to stand up to all that you are experiencing. Wouldn't it be great if we had the ability to hyperstand through all of our trials, all of our tribulations? And this passage tells us that the only way we're going to experience that is if we see our God as a good dad.

A good, good dad. Look at verse 5 with me. It says, have you forgotten the exhortation that addresses you as sons and daughters? See, have you forgotten that? God is saying, don't you ever forget my fatherly love for you or you'll never be able to endure. So what I want to do with the remaining of our time is to look at three things that our dad does and is. First, he trains you. Secondly, he nurtures you.

And third, he blesses you. So first, if you're taking notes, our good dad wisely trains you. He actually trains you. Verse 11, we're starting from bottom up. For the moment, all disciplines seems painful rather than pleasant. But later, it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it. Do you know the word trained here is the Greek word gymnasal, where we get the word gymnasium? Right, it's the gym.

Trained is the gym. So in a sense, this verse is saying, no pain, no gain. Right? You know what that pain is, right? It's not to destroy you. It's actually to build you up. If you ever worked out and you had a trainer with you, their goal is to actually build you up through that pain.

It's not to crush you. In a sense, your trainer knows you to the degree of your capacity, of your endurance, of your prior history of injury. and they take all those things to account and apply the right amount of pressure where you are experiencing a certain level of discomfort where you start to sweat, where your heart starts to pound, and your muscles start to burn. This is the way we usually train, and coaches know that. And so say a coach actually gives you the same programming as an Olympic weightlifter. You know what would happen to you? You would die.

Yeah, you would die because you'd be crushed under that way. But let's say that the coach gives your programming to the Olympic lifter. What would happen? He would die because he would no longer be an Olympian, right? And he would lose his job, right? And so a good coach knows how to handle you. A good coach knows how strong you are and the right amount of weight to put on you. How to apply that.

Not too much to hurt your body, not too little to hurt your body because a good coach is wise and knows what's best for your bodies. But imagine if we never listen to coaches, if we never listen to that kind of advice and we let our bodies do the talking. Whatever our bodies wanted, we gave. You hungry? We fed it. If it's painful, we left it. Unless we do that, you know what happened to our bodies? It'd be really, really weak.

It'd be terrible. So here's the principle. So unless you hurt your body, you hurt your body. Does that make sense? Unless you learn to apply pressure and hurt your body in a controlled environment, you actually hurt your body. Unless you're pushing your body beyond comfort, your body won't get fit. So a good trainer knows how to use your muscles to build you up.

The point is our God, our father, is the ultimate trainer. the ultimate trainer who wants to train you to be able to endure. But here are two obstacles. Obstacle number one is we confuse his good intentions as punishments. Yeah, all the time. Interestingly enough, when a gym coach asks you to do a few more reps, you might protest, but you never ever wonder or question his intention for you. Because you're like, you know he's out for your good.

Right? And yet, when God asks you for another rep, what do we say? You're out to get me. You hate me. Why are you doing this to me? And for some reason, we tend to question God so quickly, and we question his intention, even though he's our ultimate trainer. You see, we think that God is wanting to crush us rather than to build us up.

That's our number one obstacle. The second obstacle under this is that we confuse our loving father, a yielding assistant. We often feel this, right? Say you're enjoying a donut and your gym trainer has agreed with you that you're going to eat clean, right? Because after all, your abs are made in the kitchen, not at the gym. So he gives you this dietary stuff and you're abiding by it. All of a sudden, he catches you with the donut. What does a gym trainer do? Knock it off your hands or take that donut away. You're like, bummer, right? I have no donut, right? But imagine if your assistant came and snatch that donut off your hands. What would you do? You'd be offended. You're like, wait a minute,

that's not a job of an assistant. You see, the assistant's job is to say, could I get you another donut? That's the job of an assistant, right? And yet, if an assistant took our donut away, we'd be very angry. And yet the only reason why you and I are mad at God is because we see him not as our trainer, but our assistant. This is a problem. That we see God as our assistant, who's says, could I get you another one? And it's the only reason why we're upset. Are you hurt because God grabbed your donut from you? Are you hurt because you've been single for longer than you thought? Are you upset because you're single again? Are you upset because you're going through a particular circumstance where God is training you, but you see that it's not necessarily

training, but you feel like he's against you? Are you upset by that? And what you need to do this morning is remember that our God is a good dad who trains you. But here's the second thing. Our good daddy is lovingly nurturing you. He's not just training you, but he's nurturing you. Now, it's not just important to see him as a trainer, but that's not enough if we're going to endure. We need to see him as a loving nurturer because if we only see him as a trainer, if we see him only as a drill sergeant, then we could easily become a stoic rather than a Christian. because the motto of Christianity is not suck it up buttercup. That's not the motto.

The motto is God loves you so much that he sent his only begotten son. And so it is not just stick it up, suck it up. In fact, I actually have a motto over my life. One of them that I repeat at home all the time is if you suck at something, do it a thousand times. That's what I say to my kids. That's what I say to myself because I say after a thousand times, you'll suck less. That's what I say. But you know what? That's not enough for my kids to endure. They also need a loving, nurturing dad who's fighting for their good, who's caring for them. And this is exactly who we have in God. God wants to communicate this to us. Look at in verse 5. Have you forgotten the exhortation that addresses you as sons? My son, do not regard lightly the disciplines of the Lord, not be weary when reproved by him. For the Lord disciplines. the one he loves and chastises every son whom he receives. It is for discipline that you have to endure.

God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline? If you're left without discipline in which all have participated, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. Do you see the word discipline here in this section alone? There's nine times is mentioned here. And the word is Paiduo, the Greek word. You know what that means? This is where we get the word pediatrician. See, when we think about discipline, we think about something very negative and harsh. But the Bible tells us discipline is actually

nurturing, caring. Just like a pediatrician wants to heal you, nurture you, care for you. And this is how God sees you. Why? Why does he nurture us? Verse 10. For our parents disciplined us for a short time as it seemed best for them. But God disciplines us for our good. Why? That we may share His holiness.

There it is. He wants you and I to be holy. Well, how? This is how. He applies benign pain to you under controlled circumstances so that you will avoid greater pain later. I'll say that again. He applies benign pain. in controlled circumstances so that you may avoid catastrophic pain later.

And that's what great dads do, great moms do. For example, in our household, lying is a big no-no. If you lie, you are in big, big trouble. Man, if you go about your life and you steal something, you get into a fight, you shout at someone, or you accidentally shank somebody, you know what, you're going to get actually a three-minute talk for me. I'm like, atta-boy, go on. That's what you're going to get.

But if you lie, immediate three-hour talk with dad. It's a big deal. Why? Because lying sets you up for big, big trouble in the future. It's not just an immoral thing. It's not just a Ten Commandment thing. It is, in your future, if you perpetually lie and you feed your lies, you're going to be in grave danger. This is what I tell my children.

Lying is not just an act, but it's a projection of yourself. So you're saying, I want you to believe this version. of me than this version of me. That's why we lie. And the only way that lives is if you continue to lie and to continue to feed that lie. When you feed that lie, something happens. It makes it impossible for people to know you because they know this version of you, not this. And when you do that, eventually you will be absent of the very thing that you need in life most of all. The human soul needs to know, to be known and to be loved. Those are the only things that we really, really, really need. To be known and to be loved and it makes it impossible.

for anybody to do that. And therefore, if you buy into that, you'll always think that people loves you for your preferred view rather than your actual self. And so they'll always think, they don't love me. They love that version of me. And if that carries on, you will ultimately believe that God loves that version of you, not your real you. And that is the anti-gospel because God loves you for who you are, not the preferred version of you. Amen? He loves you now.

He loves you now, just as you are. And that's why my kids, I tell them, don't lie. I will always forgive you most of the time. But you got to not lie because catastrophically later, you will not understand the gospel. And that's why, therefore, I have to apply some benign pain in control circumstances so that they may avoid greater pain later. That's why I say, for that, you are grounded for one week.

or we say in California, you are sheltered in place. Yeah, I know that doesn't apply here, clearly. So, but that's what we say, right? But here's the challenge, parents. How do we know what is the right amount of discipline? Have you ever wrestled with that? Is it too much or too little? Is it too much or too little?

And the Hebrew author did not leave us without an answer. This is so wise of them. Because how do we know as parents if it's helping or hurting? Disciplining or applying discipline is like a tightrope. Let me show you a diagram real quick what this looks like in verse 5. In verse 5 basically says, if you actually apply too little discipline, you will actually dismiss it. Like your kids will not learn if it's too little. That's why verse 5 says, my son, do not regard to lightly the disciplines of the Lord.

But if you apply too much, too much, if you're too harsh, then your children will despair. They'll be crushed under that weight. And that's why on the other half of verse 5, it says, nor be weary when reproved by him, or when you're receiving discipline. Don't be so discouraged. And you see what balance it takes? You need so much wisdom because too little, he will shrug it off. Too much, it will crush him. And so what do you do?

Too little, it won't learn anything. Too much, he'll be embittered for life. Man, what balance it takes, right? And the Hebrew author knew this challenge, because verse 10 says, For our earthly fathers disciplined us for a short time as it seemed best for them. But God disciplines us for our good

that we may share His holiness. You see the word but there shows us that earthly fathers and mothers have failed us. Because a lot of the times, they actually apply discipline for their good. Doesn't that happen to you? It happens to me all the time. When I'm disciplining my children, okay, I'm doing it for my good because they upset me,

because they disappointed me or they shame me. I'm Asian. I'm high shame. Just like all you southern people, you guys are high shame, right? Oh, man, you get that finger, oh, man, you get that smack people, all that stuff. It's true of the Asian family, too. Right? Don't you embarrass me out in public?

You know right? You just say yes, ma'am, to everything I don't care. Right? There's a version of that for the Asian culture too. And so, man, I'm like, I do it for my convenience. You see, I do it for my benefit, for my good. Right? On other times, though, I don't discipline them enough. I don't discipline them enough.

Do you know why? Because I have a shadow mission. You know what one of my shadow mission is? One of my shadow mission is for my kids to love me more than their mother. Right, that's my shadow mission. I know it's terrible. I can't believe I'm a pastor. I shouldn't.

I shouldn't even be here. But the most important part is God doesn't wrestle with that because he's our perfect father. He gets it right every single time because he's nurturing us because he is always for not his good, but our good, it says. It's never too much. It's never too little. Now, imagine a child who never has their wills crossed, always gets what they wills. want. Always, always getting what they cry for. You know what those kids are called? Spoiled, right? That means rotten. Right? They're rotten kids like rotten milk. They're awful. You know they're

awful, right? Spoiled children. They're like the worst. Are they? Like your neighbor's kids? They're the worst. There's actually one worse. It's the parents. It's the parents because kids don't know much better, but it's the parents that actually empower them to be who these spoiled brats are. Did I say that? Yeah, I did. Yeah, they're the worst, right? But the parents are the worst because they're the enablers. And in a sense, they're the abusers of these children because the children don't know better,

but these parents should. And so we look at them and say, that is awful. They're being abusive, right? And we would say that. And yet, we all demand that our father in heaven treats us. to treat us in an abusive way. We always say, give me everything that I ask for. Abuse me in a way where whatever I pray,

would you answer it and give it to me like a spoiled bread? Our God is too perfect and too kind and too good of a father to do that to us. And my hope for you is that God would never abuse you by giving everything that you asked for. I pray that for you. because his discipline, his nurturing, his gifts are the very best. John Newton said, everything is necessary that he sends.

Nothing can be necessary that he withholds. So he may not give us what we want, but he will always, always give us what is best. Why? Because he's a good nurturing dad and we are his children. If that is so, you need to understand two things. Two implications to a nurturing dad. One, you are his children. And because you are his children,

you cannot understand fully all the motives of the father. You know, just like your children, you realize no child ever gets disciplined and they think it's fair? Not a single child. No child ever said, what? You're grounding me for a week?

Thanks, Dad. Nobody said that ever. No child said, what, you're taking my cell phone for a month? Oh man, I think I deserve too, but thank you. Said no child ever. In fact, every discipline to a child seems radically unfair, doesn't it? And in the same way, if you're struggling, if you're suffering, if you're enduring hardship, understand that you are God's child, which means that you will never understand fully why God does, what he does,

Why? Because he is father and we are child. And so every time we wrestle with wanting to know all the answers like Job did once, we have to dial back and say, whenever I do that and demand from you all the answers in life, that means at that moment I am forgetting that I'm your child. So I get to sit under you and you are in control. Your sovereign rule rules over me and they are all good. So I get to trust you. This is how the Lord nurtures us.

Secondly, at the same time, we have to understand that God does this for our good. Verse 10 says, our father disciplines for our good. Which means you have to say to him, Lord, father, dad, I know this is for my good. And it is not retribution. This is not payback. Because one of the greatest temptation of the Christian when they're enduring hardship is to think, that God is punishing us. Isn't that true? God is making me pay. And it's an innate feeling that we have from sin and of the world. But let me help you understand theoretically how that cannot be true.

Because if you are a believer of Jesus Christ, there's an older brother of yours named Jesus. And by the way, he paid the check for you. He paid it all for you. In fact, he paid it all on the cross to such degree that God treated Jesus as if he paid the check. he had lived your life so that now he could treat you as if you had lived Jesus's perfect life. And so he paid the full bill. And because God is not just righteous, but he is just. He is all about justice. He will not make you pay twice because the payment has already been made.

And so you could absolutely rest assured now because the payment has been made that he won't make you pay. He only loves you. Praise God for that. What an amazing assurance. You understand how significant this is? Have you ever been to Costco? If you ever leave Costco, what do you need to leave with? You need a receipt, right?

You know how when an adult carries a receipt out with a cart full of stuff, they give you a line on it, right? When a child holds it, you know what they get? A happy face. Have you ever noticed that? It's a wonderful thing. I don't know why I'm seeking the happy face, but once I was. I had a six-year-old on the cart, and we're like,

full of stuff that my wife asked for, and then a few more stuff that my soul asked for. So, anyway, we had all of this, and we're carting through, and of course, we're going to get that happy face, and it was a crowded place, and we wanted out. All of a sudden, the nice lady just asked for the receipt, and I looked at my son. I'm like, son, where's the receipt? And he's like, he had no receipt. I'm like, I started panicking. I'm like, ooh, I'm going to discipline you with dismay.

No, I mean, where's the receipt? I couldn't find it. he had just dropped it. So I was panicking, and I just directly turned to the nice lady. I'm sorry. My son lost it. It's his fault. But I bought this stuff.

Could I get through? And she's like, no. She all of a sudden got really mean. No, she said. I'm like, what are my options here then? She's like, either you find that receipt or you have to go back and pay again. Pay again! And I was just about to say that I was a pastor.

But that only works for the South. You see, because in the West Coast, you'll be slain right at that moment. So I did not say that. I was just about to get really mad at my son. Then a sweet lady just comes behind and says, is this yours? And so I grab it. And the first thing I did after I gave the death stare to my son is turned it and gave the death stare to that woman. So listen, I paid it.

Paid in full. You know what your spiritual receipt is? Did Jesus die for you? Amen. Did he resurrect for you? Amen. That means he paid it all. And that means you don't have to stop near the end.

You don't have to wonder if it's okay. No, you just walk straight by. So whatever the devil tells you today, whatever your own sinful soul tells you today, maybe God is punishing me. The answer is our eldest brother paid it all for you. Praise God. Praise God for that.

That is amazing. So we could never, ever doubt. We don't ever, ever have to doubt that God is punishing us. We never. Theodore Leach, an Old Testament scholar says this, his plans concerning his children are always thoughts of good, a blessing. Even if he's obliged to use the rod, it is a rod not of rag. But the father's rod of chastisement for their temporal and eternal welfare. There's not a single item of evil in his plans for his people, neither in their motive,

nor in their conception, nor in their revelation, nor in their consummation. Do you believe it? Do you believe it? Do you know that God is a good dad? He doesn't just train you. He nurtures you. And you have to learn to argue with yourself like that in order for you to hyperstand because he's nurturing you as well. Third thing, he trains you, nurtures you. And third, he extravagantly blesses you. We're going to go through this quickly. Number one, through security. He blesses you with security. Did you know that discipline is actually a sign of God's paternity over you? That's what it says in verse 7.

Would you look with me? It says, God is treating you as sons. See, you're his son. You're his daughter. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline? If you are left without discipline in which all have participated, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. Basically, he's saying, if I don't discipline you, you're not my kid.

If I don't discipline you, then you're not loved. And so therefore, conversely, if you are feeling the discipline, by the way, discipline is not a bad word, it's nurturing. If you feel the nurturing of God, then know that that is a sign of his paternity over you. That's a wonderful security. Lord, I feel the discipline in this life, in this season. I want it faster. I want it longer. I want it better.

And yet, man, this is not the case. Father, you're reminding me that I'm under your sovereign rule. You're my dad. Thank you for nurturing me. Thank you for disciplining me. Thank you for disciplining me. It's what a Christian says. This is a sign of great paternity.

This should be an utter security for you. The second way he blesses us is through abundance. Would you look at verse 9? Besides this, he says, we have had earthly fathers who disciplined us and we respected them. Shall we not much more be subject to the Father's spirits and live? Do you see what this is? This is a philosophical argument from lesser to greater.

It's saying, if you respected your parents and they weren't perfect and you made all the mistakes, that how much shall you respect your Heavenly Father who is absolutely perfect and loves you perfectly? Right? Have your parents ever made you do something as a child that you're thankful that they did? right there are a lot of those things right i'm like thankful that my parents did this right maybe they took you to gymnastics maybe they made you take piano or whatever it is maybe they made you play sports you don't want to do it but they made you do it you look back and say i'm so grateful well in our household it's all about eating everything on your plate we just like we have this

thing where we're like i don't want my kids to be picky we're just going to eat everything and they're going to appreciate me later for it right and so i you know we give them all sorts of stuff, like all sorts of stuff. And I'm like, I want, I want you to eat the whole thing. Okay, everything clean. You can't leave the plate, I mean, you can't leave the dining table unless you eat the whole thing, right? Now my 16 year old who's grown up and now eats a lot of different things. He looks back and says, Dad, thank you so much. I didn't like it at first, but you know I grew up to like it. In fact, when he was 80 years old, man, this kid is brilliant. He's so brilliant, but he can't kick a ball to save his life. I'm being for real. And son, if you're watching this,

I love you, and you know it's true. Any, so it's, this kid's brilliant. So I put him in like a climbing camp where you climb the walls and stuff like that just so that he could be active. On that day, the very first day, they started playing icebreaker games, you know, and ask the kids, what do you like to eat?

All the kids said, hamburger, mac and cheese, pizza, hot dogs, hamburger, mac and cheese. And that's all they said. It got to my son, Caden. They said, what do you like to eat, Kaden? He's like, well, I like a variety of rare meat, microgreens, and a variety and the selection of mollusks. Now, some of you need to Google that, okay? But that's my son.

And he looks back and says, man, I'm so grateful that I like mollusks. I like salads. I like eating all different things. Because, Dad, you wanted to abundantly bless me. And if I could thank you as an imperfect parent, then how much. more could I thank God for being the perfect. And that's the argument being used here. So he wants to bless you in abundance.

Third, through sanctification, verse 10, for they disciplined us for a short time as it seemed best for them. But he disciplines us for our good that we may share in His holiness. Listen, every parent in this room could honestly admit that we made a ton of mistakes, you know, disciplining our child. But God has never made a mistake. He's never done it out of venom. He's never done it out of ill will.

he's never done it being ill-informed. He knows all things, and yet he applies his gentle, gentle, nurturing, discipline to us. Not too much, not too little, so that we may be stronger, so that we may endure through it. And this is what Jonathan Edwards says. He says, they are holy by being made partakers of God's holiness. The saints are then beautiful and blessed by communication of God's holiness and joy as the moon and planet. are bright by the sun's light. The saints have spiritual joy and pleasure

by a kind of effusion of God on their soul. I mean, isn't this incredible that God is making us into his image, into his likeness in which we find our joy to become holy? That's incredible. That's happening right now through your endurance. But fourth, it's through pleasure.

Because verse 11 goes like this. For the moment, all discipline, seems painful, but rather than pleasant. But later, what happens, it yields a peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it. You see, the Bible is super realistic about the nature of discipline. It will not feel pleasant to you. I'm thankful for that.

I'm thankful. It's realistic. And yet, it says, but look at God's promise here. It seems at first, it's going to be painful. It's not going to be pleasurable. but what does it yield peaceful fruit of righteousness? Do you know what Christian hedonism is? Christian joy?

You know what it is? It's what we get in heaven. What we get in heaven is the perfect life, the life that we were meant to live. And do you know what's in heaven? I mean, joy, hedonism, wholeness. And that is Shalom. This is the kind of peace that is talking about.

The reason why our life in heaven looks the way it is, is, it's because all the broken things are made whole once again. And God is saying this is happening right now through your endurance, that you are actually in the process of being made whole right here, right now. That is the shalom. How gracious is God. He's doing that work through you right now. Fourth through healing.

Fifth through healing. Verse 12. Therefore, lift your drooping hands and strengthen your weak knees and make straight paths for your feet so that what is lame may be put out of joint but rather be healed. That the lame may not be put out of joint but that you may be healed. This is a picture of physical therapy, right? Because your limb is lame, your arms, your shoulders are lame. What does a physical therapist do?

Does he put you in a chokehold? No, he stretches you or it feels like a chokehold because it hurts. But why does he do it? to hurt you, to maim you? No, he does it to heal you. He does it to stretch you out in ways that your arm naturally won't go wide because he is looking out for your welfare. And this is why he gives you that piece of paper with all the diagram and the pictures so that you could do it at home that you never do, right? That's why he does it so that he could heal you. He could help you progress. And this is the Christian. Oftentimes, when God disciplines,

us, when he nurtures us, and things get hard, the very first thing that we give up is our allegiance to him. We stop reading our Bibles. We stop praying. We stop attending church. We stop giving. We stop going to discipleship groups. We stop serving. The very thing, the only thing that we need to stretch our joints so that we may be healed is to do all those things, but that's the very thing that we avoid first. So singles or anybody who's going through hardship right now, I know the temptation is real to stop those things. I know the temptation is real to just abandon those things. I don't want to pray to God. I don't want to read His word, but you are abandoning the only thing that will bring you to healing. It's the only thing. And it's absolutely irrational for you to bail out on the only

thing that wants to heal you. So whatever that is on that diagram, do it. Obey. heal lastly through Jesus. First one, let us run then with endurance, the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder in the perfect of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him, that is you and me, he endured the cross. Man, in other words, if you want to be able to handle things in your life, it says, look at Jesus. Look at Jesus as not only a model of your faith.

not only the means of your faith, but also the motivation of your faith. Look at him. Look at him. Endure the cross. You wonder how God could bring such good out of suffering? Because so many of us are, you just look at the cross. What did the cross through through the massive suffering? He saved us. He made us sons and daughters.

He redeemed us through such suffering now. So you know that logically now, the cross is the very best evidence. of the fact that from suffering could be the kind of redemption that is amazing and completely restorative so that you may endure well. So look at Jesus saying, in my suffering, I gave up glory for you. So in your suffering, you could give up your idols for me. You look at Jesus' suffering and said, in my suffering, I was cut off from the Father so that in your suffering now you could draw close to the Father. Jesus says, in my suffering, I looked at you. So, in your suffering, I want you to look at me.

Will you fix your eyes on Jesus? And this is why John Newton once said, I have reason to praise him for my trials. For most probably, I should have been ruined without them. Church, our dad is a good dad. He's a really good dad. I'll close with this. I have three children.

The first one is a brilliant one. The third one is a daughter, and she's the affectionate one. My middle son, number two, he's the special one. He's just special. Well, he's uniquely special because on his sixth birthday, we found out that he has special needs, that he landed on the autism spectrum, and it just really broke my wife and my heart. And we were crushed by it, you know. And so all I wanted to do for his birthday is to celebrate it like crazy.

So I did something with him that no Asian parents do is to take their kids to the toy store. And so I took my son to the toy store. And I took him there and I said, listen, son, you get to have anything you want under this roof. In this big store, whatever you want, I mean whatever, sky is the limit, it is yours. As long as it's under 30 bucks. And he and I went after it, and we spent 30 minutes to an hour looking. And one of his condition is that he has a hard time choosing. He has a very difficult time choosing something for himself.

And so I was just really frustrated. I was getting a little bored. After an hour, I was getting really tired and upset. And all of a sudden, he comes to me. He yanks on my hand. But did you pick something? And he goes to me, Daddy. you choose for me because you always make good choices choose for you you trust me that much

because you always make good choices all of a sudden that 30 dollar limit went to 300 I'm like boy you want a car we'll go to the dealership right now let's make it happen whatever you want man house let's do it daddy you choose for me because you always make good choice could you say that to your heavenly father today listen jim elliott once said adam fell asleep in the will of god and yet he gave him a wife he fell asleep in the will of god can you fall asleep in the will of god because you know that our God is a good, good dad. And in his will, it's the best will for you. Dad, you're a good dad.

You're a good, good dad. You choose for me. I pray that you'll be able to say that today in your faith. Let's pray together. God, we thank you that you are a good dad, so good that you would train us to help us to endure, that you would nurture our faith and our hearts, that you will continue to love us and discipline us in a way that is good and right and perfect for us

and that you will continue to bless us stretching us growing us and many of us here are are in that season father will you remind us afresh of your goodness that there's no parent like you you're the perfect dad and we could trust you so will you allow us to say this day, Dad, you choose for me because you always make good choices. And I pray that you would allow us to be surrendering people

because we heard the word of God together. We pray in the matchless name of our king, our Savior, and Lord. All God's people said, amen.