The Church of What's Happening Now: The New Testament - 10/01/2012 - The Church Of What's Happening Now #12

Episode Date: October 1, 2012

Joey and Lee talk about his time in Baltimore, how lucky he is to have his group of friends, and how to live your life without caring how other people think. Joey's friend Steve calls in to talk about music and the Pink Floyd Story. Streamed Live on 10/01/2012

up the pieces When somebody breaks your heart Some Greetings cock suckers Joey Cocoa is here Welcome to the church Of what's happening now My man

Lee Syatt The Flying Jew We got Tony Bennett I want to be around Out of respect For my fucking mother On a Monday morning How you cock suckers doing

The Flying Jew Where the fuck you've been I know man It's been like a week It's fucking weird I see you See you fucking miss me He comes in with a thousand

fucking questions. A thousand quiet. There's that, who, he, ha. Smoke some weed, shut your fucking pite hole and get to go. I mean, I've never seen

nothing like this. He had more fucking questions this more he found a nickel. I don't need this shit. It was like, it was two questions. Two fucking questions. But at five in the fucking morning,

it's great to be. He had a great fucking weekend in Baltimore at the Comedy Factory. Let me tell you so. You know, this is what pisses me to fuck off. A couple months ago I went on the Rogan podcast, right?

And I was talking about blue cheese and wing and go fuck your mother and people you know some people yeah it's funny no no I'm all fucking school I like my shit traditionalized do you follow me I like my shit to be how it be I went over to fucking Maryland this weekend and I ate

crab cakes a crab claw came out of my fucking asshole I ate so many fucking crab cakes this morning this weekend but Lee it was so fucking delicious you know what I'm saying and you realize it all fucking comes to you like how these things should taste and then when you go around the country

you have all these other impersonations of fucking crab cakes and you're like what the fuck I'm not gonna eat there no more I ain't you understand what I'm trying to say like you might go somewhere here and go get Boston clam chock It's not the same I don't I fucking don't know this

I'm a half a fucking moment Okay I don't know this I go over here It's not bad then you take me home to Boston I have and I go oh my God Why have I been eating that shit all along This is the way it's supposed to fucking taste like Exactly And that's why I'm traditional

I don't give a fuck if you're gonna impersonate somebody else's fucking menu. All I want you to do is put it to traditional to that fucking menu as it is. I want to serve the best fucking food there is, correct? Hell no way. Hell no fucking A. You want to collect. You want to put down the best fucking meal

that there is. Dog, the fucking crab cakes there. I mean, they're lumpy. The crab meats in them. You know, I go to Red Lobster sometimes on the road. I don't fucking know why, because it's walking distance to the hotel. There's always 22 brothers in there. You know, there's always black people.

They told me if I should bring black girls to the red lobster. When you bring a black girl to red lobster, you get one of those fucking juju drinks with the whipped cream and the fucking straw and the pineapple coming out. What do you drink for? Listen, they will suck your fucking dick to you let your yama pops out of his asshole. You follow me? But it's just amazing when you go to a certain part of the country.

And that's why I say those type of things. If you're not going to fucking duplicate it, the same, don't fucking do it. Don't know. We want to put a spin on it. What fucking spin do you put on the fucking Maryland Crab Cape? What fucking spin do you put? on it. Nothing. Nothing. Just get the fucking crabs from Maryland. They go, listen

dog. That night I was farting in my room. They didn't fart in your fucking and you smell the fart because you don't know what you probably passed out. No, it smelled like the ocean. This is the first time my farts was salty. You ever fucking blow a salty fucking fart? Tremendous. See, you don't fuck. And then if you blow it the hooker's face, it's even saltier. It's like a margarita. But that's what pisses me off.

And I tell you, it was just fucking great. I want to give a shout out to a guy. He's not, I'm not going to say, fan. Fuck fan. He's a friend because we all connect here. He drew a fucking picture. Oh, that's amazing. Now, once we change over the fucking outlook and the whole thing, once I'm home for a week or two, his name is Stephen, Michael.

Stephen Michael, nice kid. Aloisius. I like that. Aloysius, illustrator, designer. This motherfucker dropped a poster on me Friday night that put a tear in my eye. You know, usually when somebody gives me something that big, I just leave in the fucking hotel room. I carried this motherfucker. It was

an wee, an ounce of heroin on the plane. It was at my side the whole time. I even argued with some bitch about putting shit in the compartment. That's like the biggest compliment because you don't carry anything. You don't even bring your computer anywhere. No. The fact that you didn't just like even ship it, like you carried it with

you. Carried it with me and the baggie and looked to everybody like, go fuck yourself because I know how much you know, it's a couple weeks ago we were talking about people giving you weed and stuff like that on the road. And I've always had a great success with, I have an honor amongst thieves. There's a certain

honor amongst fucking thieves and that's just the way life is. I trust a motherfucker that will come to my house and give me a gun and go I just shot a motherfucker. He gives me the gun, he tells him the truth. I trust him more than most of these fucking Republicans and these cock suckers you see in Hollywood that come up and shake your hand and oh we love you. I fuck those guys.

There's certain honor amongst thieves. Yeah. And if you don't fucking know that, then you just don't fucking know. And when you're out and you're doing your thing and when somebody gives me something like this, I look at it as a I know how much time they put into the art. I know how much time it Without asking for anything.

Without asking for anything. You know, I know how much time you do when you leave here and you go. I know how much time when you edit the fucking documentary when we did the CD. Like I said, you might not agree with that person, not political views or religious views or whatever the fuck view you have, but you respect the art. I appreciate you feel the love and the karma. Fucking Monkey Todd, that cuck sucker showed up.

That sexy motherfucker showed up and gave me a black little death squad cat for Stay Black. And this is what I'm saying. And I'll tell you. I've It's guys I love for you to twit me And twit me something Even fat fuck

I let's have a great I don't care But when I see you at a show And now I see you You guys only see me on stage And you only see me talking shit here With fucking Lee But to see you standing outside

And looking at people And talking to people It's a different patuali And when somebody shows up First time I met fucking monkey Todd And I'm sitting On a chair in Pittsburgh Minding my own business at a club.

Nobody said nothing to me. And he walked up to me and gave me a fucking Charles Bronson's CD. Oh shit. All right. He added in his back pocket and I looked at him and I hugged him. You know, because I know from his tweets and his Facebook, well, he's not really on Facebook, but it's the weirdest fucking thing, people, when we connect finally. So if you send me tweets and we talk on one, please note that I'm fucking paying attention to this shit.

I see your tweets. To see your face is fucking completely different. really is. And it's huge. I've been going to comedy shows for a while, and a lot of comics will stand by the door with their CD and shake your hand. We did the Ice House Chronicles last week, and that one fits about a hundred people around there. Like

90 people sit outside and they talk and you're there, we're there for like two hours. We're there until we closed it. And a lot of comics, like I said, are selling merch and thanks for coming to the show. You don't bring anything, you're not trying to sell anything. You're just saying hi and all, everyone's so cool. Like, I talk to people, and they're just so

happy and they're nice and talk and shirts and here's the thing guy listen we all like making money I couldn't sell merch when I was coked up and I needed $40 every fucking night I could have taken a CD burner and made fucking CDs and you know I You got that blank CD? Yeah I love

Felipe Sparza because Felipe didn't give a fuck Felipe had child support and mouth defeated he needed his fucking refitink so he would burn CDs and sell him outside the improv of Melrose he didn't give a fuck you know what's the black guy don't touch this

dun dun dun dun dun What's that? You're two young questions. I know the song. Yeah, that's old school. That guy, whatever, not LL. Cool, Jay. He would take fucking albums and sell him out of the back of his truck. Jimmy Roselli style.

Jimmy Rouselie was an Italian fucking singer in the 50s in Hoboken, New Jersey. He'd pull up with his fucking car and sell albums, the Italians and go, put the clothes the truck. Jimmy, you're embarrassing this. You know? So I could have done that. I could never sell anything when I was doing blow. When I was, I'd been getting on stage and fucking Jones in like a motherfucker for people who know what I'm talking. you're dying to do a line

and it's like all I needed was 40 bucks I needed 20 just to get the party started but with 40 it would have been a lot fucking better so I never could sell nothing I remember like bringing CDs one time that this company made for me and I just have them in my hand and people come up to me and go

I remember one time I needed fucking 20 bucks for a gram a blow I had 20 and I had like five CDs in my hand and some kid came up to me on a date like he was with his girlfriend and he's like hey man Are those your CDs for sale? And I'm like, yeah, why?

And he goes, I'll give you 20 bucks for one. I'm like, Jesus, I was just going to sell them for 10. Yeah. And you offered me 20 for one. I just fucking took it. And I got in that car. You know, it's funny. I used to do comedy in San Diego all the time.

Okay. And I would position my fucking car on the 5 to go north because I knew that the Coke dealer would close at one in the fucking morning. And that's a two-hour drive. And that's a two-hour fucking drive. One-thirty-the-ladest, this motherfucker will close. And the story I'm about to tell you is going to blow your mind. So I would have two shows in San Diego.

Okay. And I would take the car, go down there, the car would be empty. By the time I got to San Diego, I'd do the first show. And then in between the first and second show, I wouldn't talk to nobody. I'd get in my car fill up the top of the tank. Come back and position the vehicle fucking going north. You know, on the fuck. I'm surprised you didn't have it, like, I don't pay it like the joy guy.

No, no. It was not going to take care of that. I ain't know Steve Grable. You know, nobody going to put a bomb in my fucking car. Not yet, at least. So I go in, I do the kind of thing. I'd get off there, bro. Okay.

10 to 12 on the dot. They didn't pay you there. They'd send you a check. So I would basically walk out. People would like, hey, what are we doing? Hold on. I got to go out to the car. I would get to that fucking car, start that fucking thing up,

and push up to five. Now, it takes normal people. People pay taxes, and, you know, they believe that fucking, what's his name, Milton's going to change the world. Yeah, it takes me two hours and 20 minutes to get from San Diego. You fucking speed dummy, I could do, I broke my own record.

First of all I did San Diego one time and an hour 20. Now, do they have, by Kent Pendleton now, on the north, they have a little stop thing that sometimes they stop yet. Did they still have that? They always had that. What you do is, what you do is you get on the 5 and you survey the area. It's Saturday Friday night. It's Saturday Friday night.

They're not going to have somebody fucking there waiting to do with a spedomel. That's not going to happen on a Friday, Saturday night. They're out there answering the Saturday night. They're out there answering calls, people beating up their wives, people getting stabbed, people DUI. So they're doing, so they're not out there. So I would do like 90. And three miles from the fucking, you know, where they stop you to see if you got Mexicans in the trunk and shit, I'd slow down. But I'd look around.

You know, when you're passing through, sometimes they hold you. Yeah. And they go like this, right? Sometimes they stop you, and sometimes they just go like this. I would do 60 through them and they'd stop you. As soon as I looked at it, right, if I didn't see those state patrol cars pointed north with me, right from there. There's no stop till fucking Irvine.

It's 90 to 100 all the way to Irvine. But Irvine, you slow down again. Okay. You slow down again. Once you pass Irvine Mall, the next stop, when you see Los Angeles, 19 fucking miles. Okay. Again, you fucking slow it down there.

And now you pass the Commerce Casino. A lot of Asians go in there and play cards. It's all Asians. So don't worry about it. And I just run right to the fucking off to the 101. I cut people off and go right to the fucking black guy's house and get my blow. At that time, I had a black dealer, a Mexican dealer, a white guy on those particular nights. It was hell compadre.

It would be too many people at one day. I didn't want to walk out and let all these people see me going there and buy and blow. You got to watch. Oh, shit. You know how we do it. So you did 100 miles in like 60 minutes. That's unbelievable. I could do in those days.

I could do it was 102 miles. That's on paper. You know, that's on fucking paper. You would drive to San Diego. You drive a fucking hour. And all of a sudden there's a thing that's a 74 fucking miles. And you know what the fuck about me? So something's not right on that truth.

Just get you. My fucking, the thing was, just step on the fucking gas. Anyway, step on the gas and go. You know what I'm saying? I used to do that. I used to beat that dealer every fucking night because he was my favorite dealer.

And I could fuck with his head and shit like that. I go over there and tell him my own 20. I give him 80 tomorrow. One time I went over there and I fucking, one time I went over, I had to beat the fucking deep. During the week, Sunday through Thursday, he was cut off date.

It would be 1 a.m. And he was fucking serious. You know what I'm saying? So I remember one that I mugged this chick. I picked her up at the laugh factor. I ain't kidding you, Doug. This is the stuff. I just wanted to try to get my dick suck.

And we went to the liquor store together. Oh, yeah. This bitch had a nug full of fucking hundreds and shit. I'm like, this bitch is going down. She gets in a car. She's trying to push. Let's go here and party here. I go to Monday night.

Let's go back to your fucking hotel. On Monday night. We went back to a hotel. She wouldn't bust. She wouldn't let me eat that monkey. I couldn't figure out how to fucking rob her. My plan was to get her pants off. I was eating a monkey pickpocket,

I fucking do it. And I'm down there, this chick's monkey smell and tasted so bad. It was like sour fucking milk. Oh. And it stunked a little bit. Yeah, yeah.

Like, over the noodle. I thought you liked that. I like the certain stink over the noodle. Like, she ran a mile or two. Okay. I just don't like that fucking satsiki. It smells like a gyro around the pussy, and you open it up and taste sour.

Like, she's pissed and fucking sour milk. But you do what you do. You got to mug somebody. You got to eat that monkey. You got to do what you do. I have this image of you seeing that, and it's just like in the movies, like, when it slows down, and you see, like, a roll of hundreds. And, like, the music starts, and you're just like, oh, God.

But then she didn't, she covered the hundreds in the Jewish bankroll. She took hundreds, and she took singles and put them over them to fuck with my head. You know what I'm saying? So I'm meeting this fucking monkey. First off, every, like, ten minutes we get into it, she pop up and go, I'm going, she's not my boyfriend. Oh, I feel so horrible. And I'd have to talk her back in.

She put her pants on. I'd have to rub her back until it was going to be okay. And then she fucking went for it the whole time. And I'm going through a pocket that's all singles and fives. I'm looking for the hundred. I looked. There was like three yards. I fucking popped up.

I said, listen, I got to put a quarter in the fucking meter. Bam. We fucking left. You probably have people all in the country still waiting for you to come back. Probably still fucking waiting. What are you going to do? They're still looking at that clock.

He told me he was going to come back. He's looking out the window? Where's that meter? Check Twitter. Today I got a guy calling me that. is very fucking special in my life. And I'm lucky to have him in there. His name is Steve Avillo.

Oh, wow. I grew up with him. I met him. His dad died like in the eighth grade or something, and I didn't know him at the time. And then I started hanging out with him as a freshman in high school. And I got to tell you something in your life, you meet some fucking good and bad people,

but you meet some people that are extra fucking nice. Mm-hmm. And their own judge. And this guy's been my friend for fucking 40 years close to him. He's in a band called the Past Masters. and they do cover, you know, and they have some original material, and they travel in New Jersey to Tri-State Avenue, you know, banging out like Twisted Sister and all those bands from that day did out there.

But he's my age, and I've got to tell you guys, I'm lucky to have him. And he's one of the guys that sat with me at Pink Floyd, with the guy with the balloons and the whole thing. It's funny because I didn't know who to have on this week, and I looked at YouTube the other day, and I found that video. I forgot about the St. Ford's story, and it's got like 100,000 hits on it. So I said, you know what? Because I've been talking, I talked to a villa a lot.

I talked to a lot of different kids, and I said, you know what I'm going to have him on? He's not a criminal. He's an engineer. I mean, this is a guy that grew up around there, all the stories I talk about, and he never, ever, while other kids stopped talking to me or whatever, got scared of me. He loved me even more. And one of the reasons why I adore this kid is he went to my mother's funeral. That's how long I know this kid. Holy shit.

But I never forget, I never forget, leaving the church. And he was there with his mother. and this kid Tommy Sharples. And his mother pulled me aside and said, do you want to stay with us? And was his dad? Has his dad passed away by that time? His dad had passed away like a year before me or two years before.

He was a great football coach. A lot of kids loved him, you know. It's amazing the people I still talk to from those days. And people, I've been getting emails later. People like, Joey, you know, Joy Falado was cool when he called. And the other guy was cool. Mike Roebuck was cool. Like I tell people all the time, if you fed me when I was running,

I'll never forget it You know It's not even about feeding me It's a word I'm using Yeah It's just if you took care of me When I was doing my thing If you didn't judge

And you were my friend I can never forget about you And you have a lot of people like that I have all They're all like that though They're all like that Because at the end of the week What do you need in your life

You want these fake motherfuckers around you Or you want the people Who cared for you all your fucking life You know That's one of the things I asked everyone When we were doing the documentary Like what is it about North Bergen And no one could really answer it

It's just for some reason the time you were there and the people you chose to hang out with and just happened to be really, like I don't even think it's on Spuraghan. I think it was just you happen to get with a bunch of really cool people. It's stupid loyalty. It's the dumbest loyalty in the world, but I wouldn't know life without it. I would not know life without it because that's what people don't have. If you don't have stupid loyalty to the people around you and your friends and people who took care of you, the people that deal with you every fucking day, you know what I'm saying? and they're around you, regardless of you, their political views.

There's certain people that are around you every day. They love you. They want the best for you. And those are the motherfuckers you've got to look out for first. Not these motherfuckers that are bringing you this or that are telling you a fucking story. You know, I want to give a shout out to vaporic sale. They sent me a bong type hitter.

It's fucking beautiful. You know, and I tried to explain to them yesterday. I love when people send stuff. Some people call and they say, hey, Joe, we want to send you this. to talk about it. I don't have it here. I put it in limberman because I'm going to give it to red band. Vapixail is a vaporizer.

Okay. Tobacco, you know, for motherfucking refa-coc sucker. Tobacco, whatever, some fucking guy in a pot. Get the fuck out of here. Fuck yeah. And it's just got to put water in it, and you got to put the weed and put it in the cap.

And it's something for the house. But as you can tell, you know, I just cleaned this up for the show. Usually I got notebooks and this and this and change. And she'll spill and I'll electrocute myself, right? fucking here with the computer, right? So before that, I can't have water, a P-N-Bong. That's why I gave away all the fucking bongs.

Yeah, you'd have a bong. That's it. I had bong, one broke. I had, like, three bonged people that sent me. A mid-range bong is not bad, but I had, like, these fucking eight-foot-fucking bongs. Yeah, the huge ones. I had one that you needed to be an Olympic lift. I had to hire somebody to hold it while I fucking lit. I'm like, what's the point of you?

I tried to smoke in one. They had the cat helping me. I had him choked up. So, you know, I just can't have it on the desk. It's got a plug. But this fucking thing hit. I mean, it hits like a fucking mule, this thing. And I explained to him, I sent him an email and said, thank you.

And told him, it's for people who read fucking, you know, the magazine. High Times and look at the pictures of the weed. I'm an old fucking man. I'm trying to smoke, you know, all the, what is that? When you're outside, a la fresca. I'm trying to smoke. A la fresca. You know what I'm saying?

It's like this fucking thing right here. It's fast. I just press a fucking blue button that's filled with you all. I got the fucking backup right here. I don't have time to be cutting weed with a scissors and packing it in like I'm George Washington I'm packing in a cannon. And you said this place on fire in a week. Absolutely.

So I want to thank you for sending it. It's a great product. I endorse it. If you're ahead and you want to saving your lungs, look at my lungs. You hear that shit? That's 30 years. It's smoking heavy-duty fucking papers and easy widens and fucking crack pipes and, you know. Yeah.

God knows what else. But that's the thing. How can you not be loyal to your fucking friends? and number two, you know, the people that were good to you. These are people that, though, I mean, I don't know how many fucking times I go to the villa's house. He's going to tell you, we went to Pink Floyd together, went to the new barbarians together. For a lot of people to know what the new barbarians was in the 70s, it was the Stones without Mick Jagger. Oh, I hadn't heard of him before.

Nobody fucking knows about it because everybody's too worried jumping up and down about fucking, you know, some guy playing the drums and no shoes on. Oh, look at him, he's brilliant. You know, get the fuck out of here. So, what you have is Fuck out of here. Everybody, you know, there's no shoes on? Look at him, play.

Get the fuck out of here. He ain't no fucking cozy powell With MSG in the old fucking days For all those heavy metal motherfuckers that are out there. Lee, do you smoke any free for this one? I smoke with you. I'm watching you, Lee. I'm watching you.

You might be an undercover for the undercolors, Cuccault. The AC was on a blowing the lighter, so I turned his everybody. around like he's buying coke and you know like he's on Miami Vice. Remember Miami Vice? They buy fucking Coke and they turn around and do it off their fucking hand like I'm 10. I want to see you burn that motherfucker in front

of me. So if an undercover cop turns around to snort Coke, you know he's an undercover cop. You want to see him put that fucking straw in there and blast his fucking mind like Ray Leota and Goodfellas. You're fine. Science Lee, Lee, hit him with some fucking music. What do you got for these motherfuckers? We got Curtis Mayfield

Superfly. You see, they got to live with? He had a breakdown. He don't know. This is the shit he don't know. Listen to this. This is way before. Listen to this little motherfucking drums.

Are you kidding me? Or what? You're listening to the church? What's happening? Fucking now. Don't forget who's drawing us some love every day. No-ho-C., no-ho organic. Divine wellness.

Put that up here. Superfly. What, Lee? But if you're a little bit of me. If you do, don't ask no questions why. That's all is, like, only thing you've got is do or die. That's it. I have this interview with an afro, just walking around with, like, the shirt with the callers.

This is tremendous. You got to see it. That's your homework assignment this week, cuck, sucker, to watch Superfly. Everybody. It's a slow movie from the 70s, but watch this motherfucking movie. And when Freddie dies and shit, oh, my God. Well, things are smiling. Pick it up, Lee.

Superfly. What? You go. All right. Turn that shit all. A villo's about the call. We got a thing. What the fuck, Lee?

Who told you to play music? Cucks up. Yomka pours over. What's the next big Jew holiday? Maybe, probably a Hanukkah, I would imagine. But I'm fucking... When is Hanukkah? December, November.

It changes because they use, like, the different calendar. Yeah, they got to use the economic, what's going on. You know what I'm saying? If the stock market's down, why come out of the house, we got shit to do. You know what I'm saying? The stock market's saying, you're not getting presents until next year. That's it. Those Jews, they invented the handshake at the holiday.

They shake that in real tight. They give a little top. They give a little top gold. Chocolate coins. It's not even real gold. If I write that down, when we open up our Yamika factory, one of the Yamaka hats,

you're going to say, Superfly on it, you know what I'm saying? With a fucking star of David for you motherfuckers that don't know. Now you fucking know. That's what we have to get you, like one of the gold star of David chains. Look at the smoke.

I look like I'm fucking in the movie, boogie nights by myself. I'm opening the smoke. This fucking vaporizes. Hit it today. One, two, three. That's all I got to do. So please support Exescape, the fucking...

The vaporizer company. Good company. Good fucking products. I just can't have it on my desk. I'll like to keep myself. What do you got for me, Lee? What the fuck? Is all you got to tell me about New England? What happened yesterday?

Who did they beat up on Buffalo? Buffalo, but we were losing at the end of the half, and Bill Belichick probably went in there and started. Fuck Bill Belichick. It was Bill Bird. I got the fucking troops going. Let me tell you something. There's nobody funny after than Bill Bird to me when it comes to fucking sports.

He's a true Boston. Oh, he was on Twitter yesterday, cursing motherfuckers. Tell him they're going to be Buffalo 60 to something. They did run the score. It was like 52 to 28 or something like that. Yeah, but New England, you can't be letting those 28 points up, dog. Does he call him yet? Check the fucking.

No, it's on. You sure? Don't be fucking with me. I'm sure. My friend said he called 15 times the other thing. Here we go. Go ahead. What's happening, Steve?

Hey. How are you, my friend? How you doing, brother? You know me, man. I'm happy you fucking call today. The other guy in the room is the flying Jew. Lee Syatt, say hello, Lee. Hey, Steve.

This is one of my fucking goombas from the old day. Mr. Villo, yesterday I was looking at YouTube the day, and I realized I had like 80,000 hits on the Pink Floyd video that I made about going with Joe Fokarachio. And I thought I'd give you a fucking call and see if you could elaborate on our two-month mission. Because what these guys don't fucking know today, is the tickets went on sale in November, right? Or December 1st that year, 1979.

Oh, God, they... Yeah, they were on sale. I think they were on sale. Like, the concert was in February. Tickets went on sale in, like, October or something like that. It was during... It was during football season. I remember that when they went on sale.

And you had a beautiful fucking shed. Tell them the whole story of those. Fuck it. Well, you know, the thing is, when that album came out, you know, it just... That and the other things that we were partaking it, at the time kind of inspired, inspired everything to, we just lived that, that album and that concert for, I don't know, it's got to be like three, four months. Everything we were doing,

you know, I had calendars with countdowns, inspired me to do those murals. Do you remember those murals? Dog, he had these murals in the shed. You had Black Sabbath volume four, which was beautiful. You had the wall that you painted, hand-pucking painted. Hand-painted those things, man. And what was the other wall? Because it was three walls on there. Oh, God. I had Sabbath. I had the stones on one.

I think Floyd was the first one I did. Then I had a kinks, I think, for the last two. I don't know if I was... I put those on the third wall. Now, we pretty much grew up in your fucking shed. I started hanging out in your shed probably end of the summer of freshman year. Yeah, that's right. Freshman year.

I think I met you sometime in eighth grade. I met you had a basketball game up at Lady Libra or something like that. You were playing up there like a savage. Yeah, no. I don't know. Do you ever tell these guys about your basketball days, old boy? No, they don't. I wrote a few blocks about it.

No, they have no idea that I was a fucking savage and shit like that. And you were a football savage. Your whole family was involved in a football thing. Now, let me ask you something, Steve. When did you're, because the beauty about this whole relationship is like I just said before you called it. I remember walking out of my. mother's church when they were burying her and seeing you, your mom, and Sharples. And your mom said, if you want to stay with us, you know, and I loved you ever since then.

Your dad had passed a while before that, correct? Two years earlier. He passed away in 79, January, 79. Right. So my mom passed in November of 79. So you knew exactly what I was going through. And that fucking shed made me stop almost from killing myself for you. times.

Because it was our home. I'd tell you, it was friends, man. We all supported each other. We were great stuff, man. I mean, you know, and like you said, we grew up in that back room.

And nobody ever, when I said, come on, let's go hang out in the shed. Everybody was thinking it was like a tool shed or something. No, it was a fucking wide open.

No heat. We'd go back there during the week and be fucking January. No fucking heat. We'd be back there, drinking, smoking, listen to music. On Sunday nights,

Steve had drums, and I would get on the drum. and we play fucking ferries wear boots and Steve would play the guitar. That's right. But it was funny. I think of that run that we did. It was like, if you really, really think about it, Steve. It was like having, we were going to fight January,

no, it was February the 25th or 26th of 1980, that Pink Floyd concert. Correct? And it was funny because if you sit back now, it was like we went into a mini training camp preparing for Pink Floyd the War. Okay, now can I ask you guys something? Because I grew up, and I'm going to concerts when I hear about it on the Internet.

When you were that age, how did you find out about a big concert like this? Was it the radio or what, like, what did? Break it down, Steve. Yeah, yeah, it was the radio. I mean, you'd find out, you'd find out right away on the radio, you know, WNEW or WPLJ. Even back then, believe it or not, PLJ played rock and roll. Everything was rock and roll. And you would hear about this stuff, you know, if the stones were going to tour,

Pink Floyd was going to tour, you would hear about it. in advance and then they would announce you know weeks before that you know tickets are going on sale here tickets are going on sale you know we would you know either go over to the venue we'd you know hop on a bus head into the city and go to the garden to get tickets or wherever or you'd go to uh I think they had picketron there was no ticket master ticket master didn't exist remember we used to have to in the old days you had a mail for money orders let's say the stones were playing at Shea Stadium I would go to a villos and you have to have a billows and you have to have a little bit of

What you did was you entered your name to go into a contest. The tickets were 1450. You sent four times 1450 in a money order. And you sent it in and they choose you. There was a raffle. And they announced it with a letter and they mailed the tickets back to you. Okay. Wow.

In those days. Do you know what else? PLJ had them bills to that? Tell these motherfuckers because we used to play hooky and rob beer trucks and go to the park and drinking shit. Tell them they used to have Beatles Who Zeppelin Day. Look at him. talking about how many times we cut class because of a certain musical event or tickets were

going on sale we just play hooky and going to the parkin city and buy tickets dog 14 15 it wasn't none of this shit mom take us over the city mom didn't even know mom didn't exist mom was working for all of us mom was working that's right mom was working or dad was working or whatever I mean I if you think about it you know my very my very first concert coca I went to see the stones in philadelphia me too with firing to open up for them June of 80. Your father, Peter Tosh. June of 78.

My mother told me, you know, yeah, you're not going to Edson, Philadelphia. I said, I don't worry. I got rides there and back. I put up this whole bullshit story just to go. So she said, okay, I get tickets. At 13 years old, I was on trains going into Philadelphia. Go see the show. Went there the day before.

Oh, it was insane. It was insane. I mean, the characters you met at these places. Oh, my God. Listen to the concept. Peter Tosh. fucking foreigner and the stones. That's the first time I took

Window Pain Acid. I was in the 8th grade. I went down there with Vinnie Lynch and Rayo and those motherfuckers. At 13. At 13. And I went and took a hit of fucking window paint acid.

I was in that whole hotel room. You know, I was with these guys that I knew I couldn't say no to it, but I knew that I trusted them. Nothing bad was going to happen to me. They wouldn't have given it to me if something bad was going to happen. That summer, we went to see them.

Do you remember? remember when the metal lands first opened, the aerosmith, Ted Nugent, Frank Marino, and Moogany Rush, Poco. Who else was on that fucking bill? It was Journey before Journey became like, you know, what they are, what they became, you know. They were a metal band before they ever put out any of that, you know, don't stop believing and whatever that other, you know, sissy stuff is that they came out with afterwards. They were a metal band.

and I'll tell you, Neil Schaunt was unbelievable. He was unbelievable. He was one of Santana's guitar players at 15 or something, correct? Yeah, as a kid. As a kid. He was like, I know, 16 years old or something. These guys, they fucking never played the guitar until they got to college, and they learned on an organ, on a computer, this shit.

And they go out there, they play three chords, and right away, I'm supposed to jump up and down, like some fucking moron. Tell these motherfuckers I was just breaking them in about the new barbarians. Oh, God. New barbarians, like, I guess. guess when Keith Richards got busted for the heroin and stuff up in Toronto, he had to do these concerts. So Ronnie Woods had this band that was going to go tour, so Keith jumped on board, and they became the new barbarians, and they tore all over the place. We went to see him at the garden.

Now, I had tickets up in Blue Heaven. Anybody that's been to the Garden, you know what Blue Heaven is, right? So the thing that you used to do back then, as soon as the lights went out, you would just start running down and hopping walls, you know, and running away from. from the security guards and jumping down into orchestra and getting yourself lost in there so they couldn't find. Once the lights were out, it was easy to do that. You know, you always took the gamble that you might get thrown out on your ass, but, you know, I never did. You always, you know, it was a little fast, you know, you would just scoot in. I scooted down a fourth row, fourth row orchestra to see this show.

And when I saw the stones in Philly, Keith Richards was probably still on methadone or still on heroin at the time. He looked a mess. Unbelievable that night, right? Great show. Unbelievable show. Two and a half hours. It goes over. We're climbing up over the walls

to get the hell out of the place, right? I turned him. I looked down. And a whole orchestra section erupted in like some kind of riot. Chairs, flying. People hitting each other with chairs. It was insane.

Conscience were just... Fucking animals then. Insane back then. And the only thing that saved us of them? It was like a huge party. We would roll 40 in. We would roll 40 deep, because there was always at any event,

whether it was at the Garden, the Meadowlands when I was a kid, at a small venue, there'd be 30 people there from North Bergen. There'd be 17 fucking groups from North Bergen. Every park sent a different representative for these fucking concerts. And if you,

I remember like Ted and Eros, Ted and ACDC at the Garden, August of 1979. Ted was on the Weekend Warriors tour, and ACDC was on the fucking highway to hell tour. opening up for these motherfuckers. This is something. I remember taking the train into the city,

taking the bus, and walking up to Port Authority with Chris Morgan, went with me and a button. But seeing everybody from our hometown, like seeing 60 people. We were all in orchestra, bro. None of us sat up in the fucking nosebleeds because we all tell them, come down, sit with us. We mack over a fucking row.

I still remember going to see ACDC at the Palladium without Bonscott with Brian, whatever, when they came the next year. And they had to be... All right. Back in black. Back in Black. They had to be 80 motherfuckers in this row just from North Bergen. I remember the Thomas brothers.

The Thomas brothers, remember those guys from 64th Street? One of them had a hat. He threw it up on stage. And Angus Young picked it up, put it on, took it off, and threw it back at him. It was fucking amazing. We went to see... Did you go see... When did we see Sabbath?

Did you go with Van Halen that year with Ozzie? And did you go afterward again? Well, then, I saw them with Van Halen. Van Halen. Okay, that was at the end of the Oz era, and they just, they weren't like they used to,

Van Halen was, you know, they were young and hungry. They were phenomenal. They were phenomenal. Sabbath was good. But when I saw, I saw the years later,

you know, I guess when they were all old and gray now, you know, when they first toured in the 90s, they put out that reunion. Right. CB. Right. When I saw them in the 90s,

they were unbelievable. They were back, you know, they were, you know, when they first started. I guess they were. excited about the music again. Maybe they were, you know, they weren't, you know, yeah, I saw them.

You were at that show, too. I was at the Van Halen show. It's funny, because we didn't always go to the concerts together. Together, we didn't. But we run into each other there all the time. All the time. You know, you would just, you know, like, like you were saying before, they were just, there were representatives from every part of town and groups of 10 descending on this place. You know, it was mad. This is great. I don't know how many, how many concerts did we grew up when we grew up. Nothing like, and I tell people how lucky we were that area is never going to be like that again. The kids that come out of there, I'm never going to be like. How many tickets?

How many concerts, honestly, do you think we went to growing up from eighth grade on to, because I stopped going to concerts probably in 83. I think the last guy seen in 83 was like Eric Clapton or something. Oh, God. I don't even know. The Kings alone, I saw 40 times. The Kings alone. The first time I saw them, I paid four bucks at Burgen.

And I was there with my brother. and Joe Folk. I remember Joe Folk outside making me down a fifth of Jack Daniels. I don't know how I was standing. All I remember is he jumped off the stage. Ray Davies jumped off the stage during a 20th century man. And we were in the second row. The first row was like, I guess, people who plan the event or friends or the band or whatever.

We demolished that first row. Just ran right over them. And basically Ray Davies, who all had our arms around Ray Davies and stuff while he was singing. It was absolute mayhem. I think we showed up outside that place. The concert was at 7 o'clock at night. We were there at 7 o'clock in the morning.

First people online with 20 cases of beer. That's fucking. I mean, that's how we rolled back then, you know? I remember I went to one of your parties in the shed, right? One of my first adventures in the shed. Tell them about the punch that your family made, your brothers made. parties would start early in the morning, and there'd be like a, there was an old, we had this old bathtub with the claw feet, and there would be kegs, there would be three or four kegs, however many fitness thing would ice, and then there'd be these two garbage barrels. Now, you look in it and you think garbage barrels, it is garbage.

They would make this punch, this cuckoo juice. They'd throw in this blocks of ice and sherburnt and fruit and all this stuff, right? any type of alcohol that people brought from their house went into that there was rungs scotch bourbon vodka gin anything and everything in here but the special surprise was we were killing the bees that were flying around the stuff and the bees were in the punch I remember going there I was a freshman so you got a little protein with the drink you know I remember being a freshman I remember being a freshman and going to your shed one night, and it was one like me, you and Glenn Conti were the only young guys and lubes maybe, and everybody else was your brother's age,

seniors, and somebody boil or somebody was making me fucking drink those things. And I remember waking up in front of a cop's lawn. His name was Ray Ernesto. Do you remember him? He used to play basketball with us with colored socks and we'd foul him and shit.

He'd go into the fucking paint and we'd tackle that motherfucker, right? And I'd never forget him waking me up going, Coco, you're in front of my house, or whatever. He drove me home in the police car, like at six in the fucking morning. I had puke all over me. And my mother just looked at me like, what the fuck? Your mom was still alive? Yeah, my mom was, that's how I know this guy, you know? I meant when you were drinking and passing out.

Oh, that was the first time. That was the first time, really. I went out with older guys once and got sick, and she didn't know this time, the cop knocked on the door, and she fucking knew. But, uh, a villas, whenever I think of you, I really think about Pink Floyd, because tell these guys the balloon story. and we'll get the fuck out of here. We'll vote when they're in between the balloons and Pink Floyd. Remember that? The balloons and Pink Floyd.

Yeah, in between the first and second album, they had a half time and went to see the wall. Okay? And all of some, they started shooting these balloons and there was pigs flying around. You don't remember they started... Oh, that's right. That's right.

They started... The pig with the eyes that lit up. Yeah, and they had all this stuff. But they also had balloons they were throwing out. So folk were sitting in... between me, you, and chirpy. And he had a lighter, okay? He had a lighter. And every time a balloon

came by him, he'd blow up the fucking balloon with the lighter. Now you remember. There was these girls behind us. I remember the lighter. Off of the balloons, yeah. Yeah, and all of a sudden the girl goes, excuse me, why do you keep blowing up the balloons? And he goes, Satan doesn't like balloons.

And the fucking girls never came back, bro, they just disappeared. These are like three little socialites cock suckers from fucking Long Island. Their uncle probably gave them the tickets. They were just there for Pink Floyd. They didn't even know who the fuck Pink Floyd was, and they fucking went, and then they sat next to these guerrillas.

I still remember being outside of Pink Floyd. It was February. It was freezing. There was snow on the ground, like little bits and pieces at snow like the week earlier. And I remember being at Pink Floyd, and there had to be maybe 80 of us from North Bergen. At Pink Floyd, at Nassau Coliseum. and this one buddy of ours

what was he yelling, Caesar Gamio, what was he yelling at people? Oh, he just was, yeah, he kept yelling like quoting stuff from the aisle. I don't have a black book up my bones in it. And he starts yelling at me, and he would just pull somebody up there. Are you Jewish?

Yeah, because are you Jewish? Are you Jewish? Fucking Lee, my buddy here, the flying Jew would have been flying around that motherfucker right there. We, uh, you know, bro, uh, I still, and if we mentioned something, do you remember Robin the Beahue?

truck and shit in the old days. Like, you can't do that now. Remember how many times you robbed up a case of beer and there was courts and they were warm and we'd be pissed off because you had to wait two hours to freeze the fucking beer? Well, what we would do is we would go,

we would go up with, you know, either veneery or Tommy Sharpels, whoever's car we were in at the time as none of us could drive. And we would pull up next to these things on Broadway. And one of us would flip open the hatch and, you know, we would just pass in cases of beer. everybody else. This is when we had no money.

We had to think of something. And then what we'd do is we'd go down by the trailer courts where Higgins was working and we'd have like $2 for a block of ice. So one of us would take a block of ice in to pay $2,000, like three or four of us will go inside. And the rest of us would be loading up the back of the car with the blocks of ice while we paid for one. You know,

you had to be crafty. We, you know, didn't have money back then. They had that A&P. They had that A&P. Remember they had that A&P? Who left beer down? On Bergen-Line Avenue, that AMP, they had no security in there. How much the shoplifted 2,000 fucking bottles of red wine from there in our day We had a lot of good laughs

This kidavillo We didn't know a little Crazy But it was good It was good You know it's crazy That hanging out at your house Really filled the void for me

After my mom had died I think that Hanging out with you You were the last good influence I had After We were tight back then Yeah we were tight After we grew apart

When I became a criminal and shit I always did drugs You know me I was always snorting early. I was doing a T.HC. Crystal, but you held on, and you grew up to be a fucking fine man. I told these guys before you called that you're one of the best dudes I fucking know ever in my 49 years of existence. Yesterday I called him. He was doing a cancer run.

This is not some Hollywood fake guy. This guy, you know, you have a family, and I give you a lot of respect to Vils. You and your two brothers. You've always known that. You know, I love you, man. I love you at all, my heart. I appreciate you calling in a little village. I appreciate you calling in a little village.

Tell him a little bit about bandmasters. What the fuck? I can't remember now. Past masters. Past masters. We're a bunch of guys that, you know, we found each other, you know, at this right age, right? That we all love and, you know, worship classic rock, you know. Harris Smith and ACDCs, Stones, Beatles, Eppelin, Floyd.

So that's what we do. You know, we got together. It's been seven years already, Koch. I can't believe it. Seven years we've been playing together. And, you know, we just, it's a passion that you, you know, the thing that you would love to do with your life. But, you know, other things take over, you know, and this is what we do now. And it's great.

It's, you know, where weekend war is, we go out, we play almost every weekend. And, you know, we're around, like, Northern Burden County. We're down the shore in the summer. It's just, you know, just ripping it up. up one of these days you'll get to see us one of these days or maybe october 27 cops like you never know i might pop up and surprise you a vill's from the bottom of my heart i love you like a fucking brother i never forgot you being outside that church i never forgot your mother trying to get me in the house i never forgot all these things the meals and just the time in the shed you

know the hits a mess one the smoking the bone you know uh i know you don't want to talk about smoking bones but i just want you to remember something uh You know, we used to buy like a bag for 25 bucks and we'd get 35 joints and we'd roll them in the shed. And they were bats. And there were bats and we wouldn't go home. And we wouldn't go home until all 35 joints were smoked. Am I lying to you, Bill? We didn't know.

We'd sit there and pass joints around. If there was four joints and four of us, then we'd need to take a joint home for the morning. You know? We had lube's on the show. So these people got to establish that that that that that that, that, that, that, that, lobes. the stutterer, who is also our little brother, and I'm going to try to get more guys from them. I'm going to try to get Anthony Eggersie on there

and a couple other guys to come on. Avils, I love you at all my heart, brother. Thank you very much for calling up and making my fucking day. Stay black. My pleasure, man. All right, give you a family a kiss, man. I love you guys. Bye.

For everyone listening, if you go to Facebook, it's Facebook.com slash pastmasters, and it's a Facebook site for, they have a pretty cool picture of all of them on the band up, and that's pretty crazy, man. When you were saying that you were 13 going to those concerts in fucking Philadelphia, I was thinking, when I was 13, I was going to bar mitzvahs, and I was excited because I was dancing with girls for like the first time,

and maybe had my first kiss, and you were doing window pain, assing. We had already got my dick sock, and we were dry humping bitches and everything at 13. It was a different time, guys. It was a different time. Both parents worked. You fend for yourself. There was no computer, so you had to live your fucking life. you couldn't go on you porn and whack off and think that you were fucking cool

you have to live your fucking life and these kids I grew up with were fucking not savages they were uh what's the word I'm looking for they were uh they were adventurous we did things as kids 13 14 we go into New York City and buy concert tickets stand on the line with adults and go what the fuck

and by you don't know how many times I went into the city with these guys and something would happen and these guys were getting to a fight with a fucking adult Yeah, when he said when you guys were waiting outside for the concerts and had cases of beer, if 15-year-old, let's say you were 15. If 15-year-old kids were sitting outside with cases of beer these days, they wouldn't even get to open the first beer before they'd be arrested. Listen, we were good kids. We didn't respect what the fuck society wanted us to respect.

We didn't respect nothing like that. We respected ourselves. Okay, we did what the fuck we did. And that's how I live my life. I tell you people get, oh, you don't text. No, I don't text. This is my fucking football field. I worry about this circle in front of me.

Oh, you don't want to do comedy on Sundays. No, I want to be home for dinner with my wife on Sundays and enjoy my family. I've been divorced already. If I do comedy on a fucking Sunday out of state, then I don't get home until Monday. And yeah, I make a little fucking extra change, but it's not worth being away from my wife. It's a personal choice.

That's what I learned from hanging out with these guys. These guys didn't give a fuck. And they didn't do drugs. I was the only drugging this crew. A lot of your friends. This is a crew that was music. They were jockey. They were jocs.

They were all. state champion wrestlers and whatever and if I would have kept hanging out with them maybe I would have became something different these were all successful fucking kids from North Bergen but he him Glenn Conti these are my brothers Glenn works for UPS

is a big shot at UPS these guys we all grew up in the same fucking streets they just took the right turns that I didn't fucking take but they didn't stop being my fucking friend and that's why I'm the way I am today they could have stopped being my friend they heard all about everything they heard about the jury

stores and this and beating people They heard, but they knew that there was something I was going through. I had just lost my mother at 15. I lost faith. You know, my common denominator had broken down. What keeps you going every day? They kept me going. They're the ones that when I'd see him, they'd say,

dog, you want to come over and eat and take a shower and get your shit together. When we did the documentary, that was, I wanted to get him on there, but he lives in Connecticut. Okay. He would have really broke it down for a lot of people. That it wasn't about, these are my brothers. It's not like society today. They didn't look down on you on what you. you had or what you didn't have.

We did. If in those days there was an iPhone, none of us would have had it. None of us have tattoos. None of us have earrings. None of us have gotis. None of us try to be cool. We are cool motherfuckers.

Like those concerts, all the guys that long hair in our hometown that were supposed to be the fucking guys that were going to these concerts, they weren't going. They didn't know how to put two and two together. The fake stoners, you know, the high-time stoners.

We were kids that were lifting fucking, these motherfuckers had a 300-pound bench Club and squat club and they would smoke pot and bench and squat and run fucking over George Washington Bridge and at night take a hit of acid and do what the fuck savages were doing but in the daytime there was civilized fucking people

they didn't have that we didn't want to let people know our business growing up we didn't need to let people you didn't need to have a tattoo with weed on it or a t-shirt with weed on it we knew what the fuck we were doing the same reason why I am the way I am today you're not that you're very confident you don't give

a fuck what society tells you I ran out here for 10 years without a driver's license. I was, fuck about what, I wasn't tired of this tells you. You know what? Since 91, after I got divorced from my wife to fucking 2001 when I met Terry a year after, she talked me into, I didn't file taxes. Did the cops come get you? No, I come clean.

I fucking pay them. I'm almost done paying my taxes from all those years. But you can live your life. Don't worry about what society fucking tells you to do. And the rest of these sheep do. We lived our life on how we wanted to do. None of these motherfuckers. Look them up on Facebook.

Nobody's got long hair and a picture of weed in their forehead and they're cool and whatever. Nobody had to try to be cool. We were cool. We did. Like I said, we showed up at a concert with a Pacea beer. What the fuck you're going to do? 15 deep. What are you going to do?

What are you going to take it from us? Get the fuck out of here. So you're saying you wouldn't have Twitter and you wouldn't be tweeting Ozzy Osia's one if you were 15? No. We wouldn't even know what that was. We were living our lives, bro. Yeah, that's something people are missing these days. We were living our lives of 15.

We were robin beer. trucks. You heard it. Who the fuck robbers a beer truck today when you're a kid? That's why these kids are walking around fat little motherfuckers. They don't run. They don't do shit, these little motherfuckers. I got fat a later on. These young kids, 14, 13, you see them with their fucking backpack?

When was the last time they broke a fucking window or fucking took a shit in a bag and you never took a shit in a bag and put on somebody's doorstep on fire and you ring the doorbell? The guy comes out, there's a fucking bag of shit on fire. He steps on it. He gets shit on his shoe. I mean, we've heard of it, but I've never done it. You got a fucking gig a That's what we did as kids.

But these kids, the lesson I got from these guys, I'll never forget is they kept me going. They didn't do what everybody else did. We didn't do. We didn't want to do whatever else did. I remember going to shitty concerts and seeing the kids with the T-shirt,

concert T-shirts and they're saying, man, we went to see whatever shit band. And we go up to them. We were at the concert. We were in the back or in the front or we got there and we walked out because they sucked. And there'd be these fake fucking kids.

Yeah, we went, man. They were great. We went to the same concert And we knew all the songs And we tell them Where the sound was bad or this or that This concert sucked But these guys had nowhere to go

They paid 20 bucks for a concert And they couldn't be honest And tell people the concerts suck God forbid God forbid you paid For a fucking one of these shit movies They make today And when you leave there

You look somebody in the face And go the movie really Fucking sucked Because you can't be like everybody else Everybody else is saying The movie's fantastic What are you gonna fucking say? You got these motherfuckers taught me

With them then And my buddy Mike Runny who was in Delaware, they taught me how to live for yourself and how to have your own fucking voice. And we did what the fuck we wanted to do all the time. We didn't care. I mean, I was going to have them talk about eating animals.

When we were kids, they used to have parties and put them live mice and bite the fucking mice's headstrong and shit like that. There was a party I went through with these animals with a table full of glass and they were eating fucking glass. These motherfuckers were crazy growing up.

They were the other side of spectrum. And again, these guys had tattoos. Nobody was doing steroids. Nobody had the fucking tap-out shirt. I was with you until you started eating mice and eating glass. They bit a fucking mouse in half one night at a school party. At a school party one night. These motherfuckers took out a bag of fucking mice and started eating mice.

They went to the high school graduation party as garbage. So what they did was they put a garbage can over here. They cut the bottom out. Okay. And they put a garbage can over their body to look like a human block. And then they took the garbage can on top and they took a bag, a brown bag. Yeah. They kicked their head.

They crazy glued all that and they took live strings, the strings, and they tied them around the live mice. So they went into this Halloween party with the fucking live mice dangling. Okay? And when people would call their attention, is that a live mice? They'd pick it up and bite the fucking mouth in half. I was with you until right there. where the fuck I fucking grew up cocksucker now do you understand

these are not fake people these were not oh my god because of all this chichichichia talking fucking people these motherfucking and they wouldn't tell you they wouldn't tell you they were gonna do it oh my god no they just do it they were like they were fuck like

they were way before maybe they should have told somebody what's that maybe they should have told somebody why that's for fucking all these kids that want to be cute these guys weren't a lot to wear like little hats backwards. These guys didn't care about being cute or being

good looking or letting people like them. They live their life on their own fucking terms. And that's where I got that from. I don't ever give a fuck what people think or what the fuck people say. Do you, for what? I don't give a fuck. It's like what people you're supposed to do? I think a lot of people in me included. I think

I do too much. You do too much. You can't. You can't worry about it. Like I said, for 12 fucking years, I drove around here with no license in my wallet. I had a license. I didn't have I got pulled over all the time. I didn't go to jail. For years, I didn't vote.

For years, I didn't do nothing. I went underground, man. That's the thing I learned. I don't know if this is the reason why you did it, but I worked at a movie theater in Boston, and there were a lot of kids from, like, bad areas. And kids were always coming in, and cops were to pull them over and try to talk to them, and they wouldn't have their license on them. And I come from a white area.

I said, who doesn't have the license on them? And a couple of the guys came up to me, they're like, if you don't have your license on you, they don't know who you are. They don't know who you are. And that's number one. I did it just to fuck with them. I'd have it with me. You know what I'm saying?

There's so many things society tells you you have to do that you don't have to fucking do. But you think, oh my God, I have to do it. You'd live your life on your own fucking terms. And I do it still today. My wife can't deal with it. There's times you can't deal with it. There's my best friend.

You can't deal with it. You know, you ask me about something's going to happen in November time. I'm like, why? It's fucking... You know, why are we even worried about that? We shouldn't even worry about it. We shouldn't even having this discussion. We should be discussing what's in front of you today.

Like today, Monday, the best day of the fucking week. You're the only person that's going to say that, too. What's that? Best day of the week. Monday is the best fucking day of the week. They hate it because they're looking at it from the other option. You have a whole new chance of life. You have a whole new fucking week to turn it around.

You know, for years you wanted to go to college or you wanted to take a class or you want to ask that girl out. You just got your fucking opportunity again. It's a brand new fucking Monday. Not only that, it's October 1st. You could start with your goals. You could do whatever the fuck you want. What's your goal this one?

I'm going to try to lose 10 pounds. Mm-hmm. You? That sounds like a good one, and I hadn't thought about it. You better get it together, cock-sucking, because the holidays are coming. How are you going to eat chocolates when you go back to Boston?

Yeah, that's a good point. But always remember that, bro. You know what, man? Whether it was comedy or whatever, I always did it on my fucking terms, because you're the one that suffer. I don't give a fuck. Till this day, I don't break down.

You don't see me with tattoos or a haircut, so everybody accepts me. I'm who the fuck I am on the inside. I suggest you motherfuckers do, too. Don't worry about it. If they act, If they're fucking into all that face shit, you don't want them to fuck around. Why have these wasted life motherfuckers around?

Honor amongst thieves, cock sucker. What do you got going on this week, Lisa, yeah. Tell me. We got one of these Wednesday. We got another one Wednesday. Church Wednesday. Tuesday, sons of anarchy. I'm going to yoga this week. I'm shooting a Go Daddy fucking commercial.

I'm fucking going to Arizona for Friday and Saturday with the boys. I'm not working Sunday. So if you're buying tickets for fucking standoff, up lives to see me Sunday. You're in no fucking danger. I'm on the 825 on a missile back to motherfucking Los Angeles. If they had a midnight flight, you'd probably be back then.

I get the fuck out of it. It's the Lord's Day, dog. And for anyone listening Wednesday, just know that Joey's going to talk about sons of anarchy, so don't listen to you. Yeah, don't hit me with this spoiler. I'll go fuck your mother. I ain't got time for that shit. When you get home from work on Tuesday, I don't give a fuck what time. If you put on fucking sons of Anakin, you watch it, then you

listen to me on Wednesday and that's it. We're going to try this week to do a third podcast. We haven't decided yet. We're going to try. I'm going to talk to Lee and see what his schedule is. Number two, I want you motherfuckers. I want to thank you all on a personal level for bringing Ari Shafir the number one and keeping them there. Jim Gaffigan knocked them off yesterday. I put it back up last night. You motherfuckers did your thing. Thank you very much. It's very important that that squad takes over. Very fucking important. It's that time. No more bullshit. No more fucking around. This is a real motherfucking podcast with real motherfucking guests and a real

motherfucking outlook and we have the flying Jew. It's something that nobody's got. So thank you very much for listening. Thank you for fucking supporting. Testicle Testament 3 should be out soon. And that's a great one. That's the one about your stepfather. Yeah, how I got crazy. I mixed that

with fucking, I mixed the craziness of my stepfather with fucking a villain on these guys and it all works out. So thank you very much for listening. Thank you very much for being a part of it. Like I said, subscribe. Subscribe to the fucking podcast. We got a lot of shit that's going to happen before the years over.

Oh, and again, to my buddy here, Stephen fucking Michael, whatever his last name is Stephen Michael, Aloysius, for putting together the poster we're going to put in the studio soon. I love you guys. I love you guys from the bottom of my fucking heart. Thank you for listening and thank you for supporting everything we fucking do here at the church of what's happening now. And for giving me fucking the flying Jew,

Lisa, yeah, who didn't know when fucking the next Jew holiday was. I'm going to fucking stab in the heart when I'm all that. Cops sucker What song are you gonna end on? We have Superfly if you want to play that again. Let's play Superfly for these motherfuckers from the beginning, dog. I want you to listen to the fucking bass. Only a black guy could have done something like that.

You know what I'm saying? Hit it! Have a great week. Have a great day. I love you. Stay black. Throw a kiss, Lisa. Bye guys.