The Church of What's Happening Now: The New Testament - #109 | UNCLE JOEY'S JOINT with JOEY DIAZ

Episode Date: October 25, 2021

Welcome to The JOINT..... It's Monday, October 25th..... This episode is brought to you by Better Help, Onnit & Bluechew….. Go to https://www.BlueChew.com Promo Code: JOEY & Try For Free! Just $5 for Shipping! Go to https://www.onnit.com & Enter PROMO CODE: JOEY or JOINT Go to https://www.BetterHelp.com/DIAZ Use PROMO CODE: DIAZ for 10% OFF your 1st Month! Follow Uncle Joey on Social Media: https://www.Twitter.com/madflavor https://www.Instagram.com/madflavors_world And don't forget..... The Mind Of Joey Diaz on PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/joeydiaz #JoeyDiaz #Madflavor #UncleJoeysJoint #TheJoint The JOINT is Produced by: Michael Klein aka @onebyonepodcast on Social Media: https://www.Instagram.com/onebyonepodcast https://www.twitter.com/onebyonepodcast Huge Thanks to BEN TELFORD for the Tremendous intro video.....

What's happened, you bad motherfuckers? It's Monday. The 25th of October, the joint is brought to you by Blue Shoe. Oh shit! Blue Choo is here to make your dick all that it can be. Let me tell you something. Blue Choo is tremendous. It tastes good. It takes about 25 minutes to get the fucking party started. Blue Choo is an online service that delivers the same active ingredients as Viagra and Sayalis.

a fraction of a cost. It's tremendous. You could take one any time, day or night. Your dick is hard. But Joey, I'm 28. I'm not an old fuck like you. My dick is already hard.

Well, listen, how hard can it fucking be? It can't be that harder. You want her to fucking call you tomorrow and go. My pussy doesn't stop smoking. Why? Because you showed up with Blue Chew Dick. The process is simple.

You sign up at Bluetooth.com. You talk to one of their licensed medical providers. Once you're approved, you'll receive your prescription within days. The best part of this blue shoe is it's all online. Nobody knows dick. No doctor's office. No pharmacy. No judging.

You go to fucking CVS. She's not going to browbeat you to fucking death when she's looking at you. It ships right to your door in a discreet little package. Not even the mailman knows dick. Blue shoe tablets are made in the USA. USA, USA, USA. There's nothing stronger than the USA wants that a big, strong dick. And Blue Chew will give you that right now.

Do me a favor. Go to bluechew.com for help. If you could use a little benefit and little extra confidence to perform, forget about it. I'm over here building fucking Marines, but it starts with a blue chew cock, and they got a special deal for you. Try Blue Chew for free.

Joey, what the fuck? Don't fuck with my emotions. It's Monday for free with promo code Joey. J-O-E-Y. Just pay a fin, $5 for shipping. That's BluChu.com promo code Joey to receive your first month for free. And as always, I want to thank Blue Choo for sponsoring the joint.

The Joint is also brought to you by one of my all-time fucking favorites. On it! Listen, they're not fucking around. On it is not fucking around. This new black label, alpha brain, I'm telling you, you guys are looking at me. It's between the alpha brain, the therapy, the lifting weights, the sleeping. It all finally came together.

I'm a lot fluent. I'm having a great time. And I'm fucking back. It feels like I'm fucking like I gotta pull myself back. That's the fucking alpha brain. You're feeding a little lost lately. You know, you're having a hard time spitting up fucking words like I did for a year. Give Alpha Brain a shot.

Listen, if it doesn't work for you, there's 100% money back guarantee and they don't want the product back. That's how much they believe in their product. Alpha Brain comes in tablets. It comes in a powder. It comes in a prepared juice already. Plus, you know me, I'm a Shroom Tech fan. Another thing that's really helped me during this period has been the new mood at night.

tremendous if you're fucking going through what I'm going through right now you take two of them at night you sleep nappy nunu but it's all about alpha brain it's all about honor it I want you to go to honor dot com right now look at the great selection of supplements I can't help you with the kettlebells or the club bats but alpha brain it's Monday you want to start November off slinging dick with blue chew and firing at all cylinders with alpha brain go to honor dot com right now Pressing Joey Joint

Get 10% off on it Delivered right to your house And remember they're having their fucking sale Their cyber sale Black Friday sale In November I'll keep you guys posted

But jump on the black label Alpha Brain right now To get everything going Go to honit.com Pressing Joey or joint And get 10% off Delivered right to your fucking house Let's get this party started today

It's Monday morning We gotta fucking sling some dick We're taking prisoners We're like fucking Vietnam You understand me I love you cocksuckers Let's get this party started What's happened you bad motherfuckers

It's Monday October the 25th Six days away From fucking Spookyville And the whole thing It was a great fucking weekend I had a great week Thank you for being here

Thank you for checking in Let's open up the week With fucking ice cream has got the blunts in stock. They went in partnership with Packwoods. Laughing gas is now in a blunt. And let me tell you something. I hope you love your eyes.

Because I had to actually hold an eye while I was smoking this motherfucker. Your eye is going to fly the fuck out. I want to thank fucking pipe freeze for sending us a bong. FreezePipe.com for sending us a new pipe. And a little fucking smoker from my man Mike Klein there. so now he's at home doing bonn. I love when I give Mike weed. Like, I don't even have to fucking ask him if the weed is good.

I just wait a night and look at his artwork. When I see that a picture of a devil fucking a monkey, I'm like, that weed is good. You know what I'm saying? I'll watch some of the Rogan posters and shit, and I go, this weed is fucking home me up. Dude, he asked me, he told me the other day, you know, the last couple, they're kind of out there.

Yeah, they're out there because I'm giving them the weed of debt. There's one day I woke up He wrote three songs He composed a fucking album overnight I woke up at 8 in the morning He's like I wrote an album And performed the last night What the fuck Mike?

Don't know Mike I gave him that weed He gets like Lee Remember when Lee used to smoke He used to come up with business ventures I got a new idea for floatable donuts You know shit like that There was always something Every time you gave him good weed

They go home And they come back with a fucking A guitar You know they come home with something They come back with some I thought you needed a guitar That's fucking tremendous. So, yeah, it's always great to smoke some good reefer on the fucking weekend.

Dog, it was a great. I posted a picture the other day. Since I have moved here, people have been telling me about this restaurant in Oneido. Joe, you got to go to Olnito. Joe, you got to go to Olnito. It's close to my house. When I go to the gym, I have to drive by there. And I see they have, like, little boots outside that you could sit with your girlfriend.

just alone in the booth if you want they close the curtains for you I love that shit when I first got into comedy I used to do comedy that place called the broker great fucking restaurant I loved it

till this day I'm very loyal to them they won't let me back on the place to do comedy but I you know some people have short memories you know what I'm saying everybody says everybody says they're a Christian but they don't practice

what they preach you know what I'm saying so they had four restaurants they had like the broker in Boulder they had the broker in like Aurora every one of them had a different name but they had the broker in Denver and it was called the woman's bank and you're like the woman's bank

until you went down there for starters the broker when you sit down they'd open up with a back with a fucking not a cup not a not a thing not like a soup bowl I wish I was exaggerating to you they'd open up with a manhole cover

filled with shrews shrimp, Katrina shrimp, you know the ones I'm talking about, the ones you dip in soy sauce, not soy sauce, cocktail sauce. If you eat 20 of those, you're going to shit blood because they don't clean them. They're just the little geeky ones, but you know what? When you're 31 and broke, you will eat those motherfuckers like that filet mignon. You know what I'm going to throw them up in the air, like fucking just lick them out of the air. I would go to the broker just for the fucking shrimp, and they would bring you a bowl.

But the thing about the ladies bank was the woman's bank, I'd take a date with me. come on dog when you're young and you're doing a couple fucking bump of roos you close the curtains you eat her monkey and then breakfast is served you know what I'm saying boom the waiter comes my aunt to my come in absolutely you pull up a little panty hose and you sit there and you you eat your fucking shrimp you eat 20 shrimp you got a hard on and you close the curtain again and give another stabbing doggy style nobody knows nothing who gives about the flower in her shirt it's a little fucked up you swish it you know I'm saying you smushed it fuck it but I don't like that shit when you could close the curtain and stuff not that i would do anything perverted

down there but i'm saying that so it seemed interesting to me you know i'm like to have curtains then i joined the pool and at the pool there were these little fucking old dudes that were retired but there was this one dude a jewish dude sweetheart phil he would always talk to me about restaurants this guy would spit out restaurants from boston iowa because he traveled for a living so he That was his thing, was hunting down restaurants. You know, this guy could tell you, like, I asked him about a restaurant. He's like, what did you think about the fountain? When somebody tells you, what did you think about the fountain?

They looked at all the details. Like, they liked that shit. You know, there's people who live for that shit. And he was telling me that that restaurant is in the top five restaurants in Jersey. He goes, I did the math. He goes, this is what I do. This guy's retired. He goes out to dinner five nights a fucking week all over the place.

plus my man Dave Baton, DB orthopedics, I'm going to give him a shout out. He helped me with my knee. He's trying to help me with my right, left knee now to get the arthritis out of there. DB orthopedics, that motherfucker knows every slice of pizza,

every meatball from here to fucking Delaware. It's unbelievable. And he was telling me, like since the beginning, even when we go out to different dinners, he would go, dog, I'm going to take you to Telanito one day. I'm going to take you Telanito.

But then I heard mixed reviews. People were like, it's really good, but it's not my type Italian food. And I get it. And then people are saying, well, they don't give you big servings. And I get it.

It's fine dining. What are you a fucking gorilla? Go to Burger King if you want to eat all you want to eat. You got to have some fucking cadence thing your fucking life. What are you fucking? So I finally, me and my wife, you know, we try to do a date night once a month.

I mean, with the kids, we're out all the time eating with the kids and shit, you know, medium range restaurants. wings, pizzas, I get the salads, shit like that. But, you know, you got to take them to a carpet joint from time to time. You know what I'm saying? You got to take them through a rug joint. You know, fine dining, fucking some guy playing a violin.

Not that they're playing a violin in El Nito. They don't need to play a violin. They don't need no fucking gimmicks or nothing. So fucking Thursday night, me and my wife went down there. Holy shit. That's all I could say. Holy shit. First off, it's all organic.

The owner, his name is Joe, he's a 78-year-old Joe Rogan. It's like if Joe Rogan was 78 years old. When they bring you every dish, they explain the history to you of that dish and what region of Italy came from. Now, you guys know me a long time. You ever see those waiters, they bring you a glass of wine and you have to taste it. Then they stand there. It's like, you know, just pour the fucking glass.

You know, I'm one of those fucking gorillas too, you know what I'm saying? It was just sharp. Like from the minute you walk in there, we sat down, fucking, you would never hear this word out of me. The ambiance is tremendous. When he came over, he confirmed it. You know, I have a problem hearing. That's why I have those hearing aids. I have a problem when I go to a restaurant, when two people, when I'm talking to Mike, let's say, at a restaurant, I don't really hear Mike.

I hear the dishwasher in the back slamming. I can hear the cooks talking because my hearing is fucking off. So when I go to a restaurant, nine out of ten times, the food better be good because if not, it's an uncomfortable situation for me. I'm unfunctable in that. Like, I can't hear. So when you're talking to me, not this place. And when Joe the owner came home, we were talking, he explained to me that he installed something in the ceiling. So all the sound gets started just way ahead of the fucking curve.

Way ahead of the curve. All their ingredients are 85% imported. I mean, you've got to taste this shit. He grows all his vegetables. So when you put a vegetable, like whatever you think a green bean tastes like, when you taste it in there, it's what it should taste like. The fucking chicken in there, it just breaks off. It's those chickens that have not been kicked.

You know, those chickens that people were nice to them, like they pet them and played like flute music, like Jettolde goes over there when they're in their cages. And he plays a little soft flute music. and he throws fucking rose water at him. These are the chickens they fucking, like, they give you. Like, as you're killing them, you're crying because you feel bad. They know how to say the ABCs. They're that type of fucking chickens.

The chicken melts. It's like chicken from 30 years ago, like before the steroids and everybody fucked up chicken and started putting shit in chicken, and now it has that weird taste to it, but you eat it like a fucking animal because there's nothing better than fried chicken. You don't give a fuck when you're eating fried chicken. But the chicken, everybody I talked to said, When I go to El Nito, what should I eat? And I said, eat the chicken.

And I'm like, it's fucking fine dining. Who eats the chicken? Well, I went Thursday night. Friday night, we had a kids party that was really cool. They showed a movie outside. It was great. Saturday, I took it a kickboxing, did what I had to do. Saturday night, a buddy of mine from North Bergen called me old school 40 years ago, the whole fucking deal.

He called me in the afternoon. He said he hadn't been out in two. weeks. I said to him, I don't know what to tell you. I'm not fucking, I don't own Studio 54 anymore. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, I don't know what to tell you. I can't do nothing for you. If you don't get out, you got to get the fuck out. I had a birthday, a party to go to the last night with the kids

and shit. So I said to him, listen, if you want to come down here, they're family, these people. You come over with me or come on down. It's a 45-minute drive for you. Clear you're heading. you've been in the house all fucking week, clear your coconut, and we'll go get a bite to eat or something, something small.

I had already eaten lunch, had already a protein shake when he called. I wasn't really that hungry, but I fucking said, fuck it, we'll figure something out. Sure enough, he showed up around 7 o'clock,

and we called the restaurant that he wanted to try, and the restaurant was sold out. He goes, what type of fucking guy? Don't you have any connections to get, meals i'm dog i don't know anybody so i said but we went to tel nito the night and the owner joe gave me a car and he said to call him that he's always got a spare table i go even if we have to sit outside

do you want to go to nita and he goes yeah i'll try it we went and we had a fucking blast last night it was we're there for two hours no i had a little taste of red wine just a perfect fucking amount didn't give me a headache i didn't get sick i had some spaghetti i ate light last night a little spaghetti, half a serving, and I had a piece of fish, zero motherfucking points of shit. And we laughed our asses off. I took some pictures of some people. I laughed with some people, and we were home by 9,000 30. You know, he goes to sleep fucking early.

So I came home and I watched fucking Atlanta beat the shit out of Dodgers. What a shame that was last night. The fucking Dodgers spent all this money on a fucking baseball team. You know, it's like I go to say to you guys, you get the most expensive coaches in the world. But if you ain't got no fucking, you know, whatever, nah, you only tell what happened with them. I think they won a lot of games. They played a lot of fucking games. And they were just beat up.

They were just beat up. It's the season starts in fucking February, April. You know, they're throwing pitches and catches. And it's a long fucking season. And with baseball, the winner world series, you all. have to come together in October. It's a big, it's like a 50-50 shot. You go out, you get all these fucking players, you get out, you get all these pitches,

and come October, September, everybody's fucking hurt. It's a long season. So that's why they make those mid-season trades before the All-Star game. You bench these people, you let them get out of their fucking rotation a little bit, and then you start them again, and hopefully they're on five. You know, when you have a team of nine people, you eliminate the pitcher, that's eight people. Eight bats are coming up. I need three of them to be fucking hot.

I don't care which three. I just need three bats to be hot. That's how the Yankees won it. For years, that's how they were playing great ball. You come together in October. Like when I was doing comedy, stand up all the time. Towards the end, my piece is really coming together. It takes a while.

But you either fall apart in October. You're tired, your injuries, little nagging injuries. You pull the muscle in your shirt. shoulder. I think that bullpen, if you watch the game on Saturday night, what was shocking to me was that the Dodgers pretty much put in their best fucking reliever, that big fucking African-American dude that throws fucking heat in the top of the eighth inning and he threw two pitches and a motherfucker hit him with a double. Like when you put your best reliever on there and somebody blast the fucking double off you in the eighth inning and he came in fresh and this guy's been

plane since the first inning, they lost that. You could see it. If you watch the game Saturday night, once he threw that fucking pitch and the dude, he just all the oxygen went out of him. It was over. The game was over. The series was over. I'm not mad at anybody.

They played a fucking great game. Atlantic, nobody fucking saw him coming. And that's what the World Series is about. It's about you get one popular team in there and one team that nobody saw coming. We call it what you want, a Cinderella, and that's what makes it beautiful. If it was the Houston Astros against the Yankees, who gives a fuck? This is an interesting World Series. So I don't know what you're doing for the World Series.

If you want to click on Draft Kings right now, they have a link that you could just bet the series. If you just don't want to bet the five games or whatever, you could just click on a link, bet fucking Atlanta Braves or the Houston Asthma. and knock yourself to fuck out. I'm going to watch the games. I'm excited. Now we got a little fucking, we got a little fucking football.

We got a little fucking World Series ball. We got a little NBA ball. We got it all, guys. Things are fucking happening. And they're moving fucking quickly. When I wanted to talk to you guys about today, the thing that everybody's talking about here, that, uh, what the fuck is this?

Why do I always? Fuck myself up. Does anybody fucking know why I fuck myself up? It doesn't. That laughing gas fuck me up this weekend. Plus, I've been fucking doing those, they sent me some tinctures. You know, I got to switch up to shit. Like I was doing A, BXs to go to sleep.

I switched it up because your body gets fucking tolerant of it. I switched it up from A BX. I did the right thing. I went from A BX, and I switched it up to a tincture. which, let's say if I want to go to bed 11.30, I got to drop these tinctures at 9 o'clock. It takes a while for them to hit you. It's like a fat dude that's old throwing a punch at you.

It's going to take like eight years for it to land and shit because he's fat, he's breathing heavy, but once it fucking lands on you. But boom, it's all over, but the fucking shot, it's crazy how I'm watching baseball. I'm doing things I haven't done in 30 years. and I'm doing things. I never did at all.

Like this has just been fucking a great time for me just to take this breather guys. You don't know. You have no fucking idea what I've gone through the last 30 fucking years. Working, being on sets,

podcasting, dealing with agents. You know, man, it's been nice to take a breather. It's been nice to find the real Joey Dears. It's been nice to unwind. It's been nice to

just when your life i'm i miss so many things in my fucking life i missed them because i had a mission and that's okay i could deal with that then but i can't deal with it now i got one foot in the grave one of banana peel i don't know when this is gonna fucking end but i'm doing things i'm smelling things i'm seeing things that i have not seen in 30 years my life you know this makes me realize how much of a commitment i had towards stander comedy and to become a great stand-up comic. It takes a lot of commitment. It takes a lot of your hours.

It takes a lot of time, and it's kind of nice to unwind to see where the fuck you are. But I'll tell you what, it's also kind of refreshing to know that even as now as I'm writing a couple of jokes here and there, I'm writing from a new perspective. It's not about a stinky muffler anymore. You know, I had to grow. My comedy had to grow.

So I had to get that vocabulary out of my first. fucking game. I don't know if you guys understand what the fuck I'm going with this, but that's what needed to be done. When I found myself going back to Uncle Vinnie's like last January, even though I had taken an eight-month

break, I had no material. So I was going back to the, not doing old material, but I was talking about old shit of me living in California. That was part of me wanting to take a break also. I wanted to reprogram my fucking head. I wanted to

you know, rewire my brain. I was intelligent enough to take a look and go, I got to back off a little bit. I got to show up with a brand new band. Do you know what I'm saying? You just can't fucking show up and be doing the same thing

with a different three people. You got to show up with something. You got to, so it's been great. I've gotten a chance to fucking step back, smell the roses, you know, like what the fuck is going on? In the words of Jim Morris, and take a look around, say which way the wind blow.

We're the little girl in a Hollywood bungalow. You know what I'm saying? You got to fucking, you know, so I didn't want to come off the fucking ship and just run out there getting led by my nose. I wanted to take my time, see what the fuck was going on. And I appreciate that. You guys appreciate that.

That I didn't even know what the fuck was happening. And now I feel so much better about it. And part of it, listen, guys, and when Mike came into that, I was talking to a friend of mine. who called me, he's going through a hard part right now, and he said to me, you know, is it, do you think the therapy helped you? And I go, no.

There was a couple of events and a couple things that had to happen for me to get there. But everything combined, you know, when you go to Jiu-Jitsu, right, let's just take Jiu-Jitsu, for example. Or I'll take stand-up comedy. When you take Jiu-Jitsu to example, for example, it's not just going to class. It's not just going to class. you got to eat good you got to drink water

you got to fucking sleep good you got to fucking lift weights you got to run a little bit for cardio you got to do all these different things to make who the fuck you are with me it's acupuncture jujitsu lifting weights spending time with my family

spending time with my friends sleeping smoking good reefer all these things contribute You know, my ref intake has been down. I mean, fucking way down. One joint a day, way down. Friday, Ari came down.

I got to tell you something. I bought a round of applause. I smoked before 2 o'clock. Me and Ari smoked one of those fucking whatever. And one of the laughing gas blunts from Packwood. And we went to the Seshwan fucking place. We had some chicken. What's that thing?

He likes General Touse chicken. Extra spicy. I can see his Yamika fly right to fuck off. We had some nice rice. I had some nice fucking... I had the chicken and shrimp with string beans. Delicious. No point.

Three points for the sauce. Yeah! And six for the rice. Yeah! It's a little bit of rice. We had a little egg drop soup. Ari had some fucking egg rolls. With fucking tons of mustard on it.

That motherfucker loves this food spicy. And then we came up here. We sat around. We fucking play with his dog. My daughter played with his dog. It was a very nice little afternoon. We just sat, got a little vitamin D, and chit-chat it. That's it.

Very therapeutic, as they say. You know what I'm saying? Just a little something to get the party started. But I don't want you guys to think that it was everything. It was everything. When I was going through my little fucking spell there, there was every time Mike was coming up, I felt like calling Mike and go, Mike, I can't do this thing.

I can't handle doing it. I still remember telling Mike, Mike. I'm going to go on medication. I need your help. Watch me from time to time. If you see me going off the deep end, turn off the fucking camera and stop the button, nothing.

We've been fine. But I told them, I made them aware while I was going on, and it was so fucking weird where my head was at. I mean, between my anxiety, I was telling me, they had a little touch of depression.

Like, thank God I'm the type of dude that the first thing I do when I wake up is wash my pussy. Depression does not like showers. They want you to be dirty and greasy and that's what I do. As soon as I get up in the morning, you take that cup of coffee, you take a shower, and you force yourself to go out.

And thank God, I would go to the gym, and it was fucking uncomfortable as shit with the anxiety, but I didn't give a fuck. I knew that the end result would be great. I had been feeling a lot fucking better lately. I mean, 200 fucking percent better. My sense of humor's back. I feel lighter on my feet.

I feel fucking stronger. And I thank everybody who supported me along the way. My wife, I thank Michael. You know, I came clean with all my friends and told them what I was going through that I needed that, you know, I watched triggers, you know, anything that would set me off. I learned, listen, when you're trying to get back on your feet or you're trying to get back mentally, you have to take everything in. You know, I had to start over again. I gave the edibles a breather. I started sleeping again.

I gave the reefer a breather, just to see what would work, you know. What works for me? You know what? Smoking dope all day doesn't work for me. But smoking a joint at night never killed nobody. Never killed nobody. You understand me? A little tutz-a-so-o-o-to-oots about 10 o'clock, watch TV till midnight.

You're fucking fine. But I rolled it all together with BetterHelp. I don't know if you guys know this. The Joint is sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy. The best way to think about therapies like this, all right? We all get all changes to our cause to prevent bigger issues. down the road. Therapy is the same thing for you, but it's for your fucking brain. Going to therapy is routine maintenance for your mental and emotional wellness.

Prevent bigger issues down the road. That's what I did. So that's how it's helped me better help.com. My girl Dana, we hook up once a week, 845 a.m. on Mondays. I started off on a Monday, so I get all the bullshit out from the weekend. So already today I've talked to fucking Dana. She's on she's probably dancing some fucking party right now. I did my little chit-chat. I got whatever and I talked about hangs in the fences. That's it. So if you got a fucking problem right now and you need some help, you need to talk to somebody other than your friends. Better help is customize online therapy. They offer video, phone, and even chat sessions with your therapist. You don't have to see anyone on camera if you don't want it. It's much more affordable than in-person therapy. and you could start communicating with your therapist in 48 hours. Why invest in anything else when you can invest in your fucking self? Just for you joint family listeners, I'm going to give you 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com slash Diaz. That's betterhelp.com slash Diaz.

I'm going to give you 10% off your first month, whether you do two sessions or four sessions. I don't care what you do. Take control of your life and get the help you deserve with better help. Let's drop that on you just so you know where I'm coming from today. I want to talk to you guys about something that I know that you've all read about the last couple days, and I'm going to break it down for you and tell you the truth about it. I don't give a fuck about who gets mad or who doesn't get mad. Last week, something happened that fucked everybody up with Alec Baldwin shooting the AD on the set in Santa Fe, New Mexico.

go you know man and everybody's pointing fingers that alec baldwin and shit because you know alec baldwin has created this aura around him well he's always got to say creepy shit and act fucking creepy so people want to put him under the jail listen alec baldwin is a fucking creepy guy and his ego got control of him and it's fucked up but now i want you know i went to california six months ago i had to see the dentist and i see my heart doctor and I had to go see the weed people. And when I was, when I finished, I was waiting to get back on the plane, I called my man Dean Del Rey and I asked Dean if he wanted to go eat.

And Dean came. We went, we got some Mexican food, we got some potato tacos. He brought his cute little dog. And we just bullshit it. We just bullshitted about life and what was going on and how he was feeling. I was still fucked up. I was going through my bullshit. We had a great chat and we walked outside and while we were outside just sitting on Burbank Boulevard in front of the hotel,

Dean goes, hey man, before I leave, can we take a picture? And I go, absolutely, Dean. So we took a fucking picture and he put it on Instagram. When I got on the plane that night, I was just checking shit. I checked Instagram and I saw the picture that he had put up of him and I. And there was a little comment and the guy goes, there he is, you know. whatever he wrote like a thing about me there he is the man of steel there goes a man at a time that wasn't scared of anything but today he's scared of everything and i looked at that comment

whatever it is what it is some guy and i thought about it i go you know what maybe he's right in a way you know i never had any fear of much and uh watching the news and this fucking whatever was going on got under my fucking skin, plus with my vulnerability, and that's it. I built up this fucking anxiety. Maybe that's what happened. But I thought about it in a deeper sense, you know, like, what the fuck is going on with me? Why don't I want to do this?

Why don't I want to do that? Well, yes, I was scared, but I also knew one thing. Last year, I moved here in August, and about October, my phone started ringing. Not a big, you know, not a big shock. It just started ringing with little offers for movies, TV shows. It was more TV shows, okay? And it was like a TV show in North Carolina, and they kept pressing the issue.

They really want you to read for it. There was a movie in the Dominican Republic that they wanted me to do about Cuba. There was a movie going on in, somewhere in Arizona that reached out to me, like a TV show. and there was a TV show on ABC that reached out to me in LA. At the time, my head was like, you know what, man, I just got here.

I just fucking got here. I don't really want to get on a plane and start traveling all over the fucking country. That's not what I want to do. So that was my mindset. But then I spoke to a dear friend of the joint podcast. I spoke to a dear friend of the church podcast, great friend of mine, Greg Garcia. We were just shit-chatting. And Greg told me he had a show on Amazon,

which I just shot two months ago maybe. And he was telling me that, you know, these shows, they require $400,000 per episode with COVID. COVID adds an added cost of $400,000 to a TV show per episode, guys. So if you do 10 episodes, of your TV show, it's going to cost you $4 million in COVID expenses. You're like, Joey, how can that be? Well, what used to be a van to take me, Mike, my wife, Mercy, you, your wife, your kid,

to whatever. Now we can't. Eight people can't get in a van. It's got to be one person for van. If you want to be cheap, I was on a job where they put four people in a fucking van. Okay, again, this is what I'm saying to you. So I had shot the Sopranos. I saw, I had heard what it cost them for those five days we shot, just for COVID.

And I was blown away, but let me give you an example. They put us in a fucking hotel in Midtown Manhattan. That was gorgeous. They rented the whole hotel. You couldn't just rent like eight rooms. They had a rent. Like the whole hotel, I was basically on a floor by myself. They had a contractor room that had a little bit of like it was outside, but really inside.

What do you call that? Like a, yeah, like a room that could open up so air could go in there. I mean, it was the end of spring. It was the end of fall. It was kind of nice out. So they, you know, that we could all go in there and nobody would get COVID. But there was, like I'm saying to it, it was me, John. Maybe Mike Gandafini, Samson.

If I say, I think your boy, you know, Ray Leota, there was maybe eight of us in the whole hotel. How many fucking rooms in the hotel? Let's say there's six rooms on a floor. If there's 12 rooms, that's 60 fucking floor. 60 rooms. There was eight people in the hotel. The hotel was catering to us eight. They had two New York City cops at the front door.

That's a detail. You got to pay those motherfuckers. They went and got us anything we wanted to. Like if we said we needed deodorant, they would go to CVS and get us deodorant. They also had to drive each of us individually to different rooms, and then we had to get tested,

and then we were put into general population after an hour. And even then, they didn't want you mixing and matching. You had a COVID- fucking lady. They're supposed to have three, COVID agents on a job site. Again, this is what I heard. The Many Saints in Newark had like fucking eight and nine of them. So I felt safe.

When I did The Many Saints in Newark and I saw how they were doing something, how they were doing the whole COVID thing, I felt really safe. So I was like, fuck it. You know, this is great. I had no problems. You have to wear a mask the whole time. the only time you don't wear a mask is after you get tested when they're about to shoot your scene

and I mean you go into the scene with your fucking mask on and some of your lady you yell take your mask off and real quick you got to put it in your pocket and then you shoot the scene and she'll say mask back on and you got to put your mask back on while you're waiting there so they can adjust that fucking light over there

and that flower that's fucking blocking the camera so now I got to wait there with my mask on and then take the fucking mask off and then shoot the scene again. It's a fucking nightmare, but it keeps everybody safe. You don't want to have a contaminated set. So once I did the Sopranos,

I was like, you know what? They went fucking deep because, you know, David Chase is up there in the years. You know, director was a little older or whatever. They went all out. There was no crap services. there's no crap services, there's no truck with M&Ms in it no more

that you go and go, hmm, do you have marshmallow flavored marshmallows? You know, because the bigger the movie, the more shit they got. Peanut M&Ms, you know, they have a bag with no red M&Ms in case you're in Van Halen. They got everything on those big movie sets.

So that ended. They give you a thing the night before and you have to fucking order your dinner and that's it. They give you a container with two meatballs. I got spaghetti of meatballs. They give me two meatballs, pasta, and a fucking salad. How about I'm going to give you?

That's what they give you. There's no more crap service. So what I'm trying to say to you is when I got all these calls to go to North Carolina, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I go, why aren't these guys shooting in L.A.? I know why. See, when you shoot somewhere outside of L.A., it's a little bit more lax.

they said they were going to find places, regions where the COVID numbers were lower than, you know, usual. That's not it. They're shooting in locations to be out of L.A. So they have an excuse that we didn't know what was going on out there. It's like when they shot Caddyshack and they went to Florida and they fucking walked into a cook party. And then years later they were like, we didn't know what was going on out there. We didn't know what was going on down there. And they didn't.

They didn't. That's why you shoot in fucking Florida. Because California is here, and Florida's all the way down here in West Palm Beach. What are the chances of fucking paramount going back and forth to fucking Florida? So they just left them alone and shooting. I like shooting on location. I like when people calling me and say,

we're shooting here, we're shooting there. It's kind of fucking nice. But it makes a guy like me think. So that, I wasn't scared of COVID. to say more. I was scared because I know you're not doing

what you're supposed to be doing and I know you're going to cut back. The producers are so greedy. What do you think? They're going to take a pay cut? You know who this is going to affect? The fucking actors, food, hotels,

everything that goes with. They're going to try to bullshit you. They're going to try to put Mikey and Joey in the same hotel room. You guys hang out together. Why don't you guys bunk together? It's a great idea. No, it's not.

I don't want to smell a man's fart and he shouldn't smell my fucking feet. You follow me? And then they hate you with. See, what you guys don't know at home is that, yeah, they pay your 600 a day to shoot a movie, 640 a day. You got to pay 10% to your agent.

It's great fucking money. That's the Hollywood you signed up for. That's the Hollywood I signed up for. I took a chance and not having a full-time job, but when I do work, you're going to pay me a little extra. I take that chance in life. That's a decision I make. But when you get the fucking Hollywood,

you do a couple scale movies, and then they start hitting you by the ways. Oh, this is a SAG whatever contract. That means it's not scale. It's $456, okay, $450 a day. I could live with that. You could all live with that. That's a nice figure.

But then they have 250-day movies. And that's okay. You know, you're just getting started and acting. Who the fuck are you? Charleston Heston? Somebody fucking knows you? No, you take the 250, you know what I'm saying? Then,

fucking, a lot of people don't know is they have a thing called low budget. And I got bad news for you guys that think that, you know, I have a helicopter. They pay 100 a fucking day. Okay? And you work all fucking day. They give you overtime after a certain amount. It's a kink fucking deal.

And get ready. Hold on to your seats. They also have an ultra-low budget contract, which is $50 a day. Now, I'm sure you went to acting class and you went to fucking college for four years to study drama and to study theater so you could get out and make $50 a day on a fucking movie. I'm sure when you made the decision to be a fucking actor, that was included in it. How you're going to make $50 a fucking day? I can make $50 fucking dollars a day pumping gas at fucking Hess down the fucking corner. So $50 a fucking day.

Meanwhile, that produces driving a fucking Porsche. And I drove here in my fucking Toyota because my skateboard is getting serviced. Do you understand where I'm going with this? These motherfuckers are going to take that $400,000 for COVID. First off, they're going to fight to get a deal. They're the cheapest cocksuckers in the world. So they're going to fight to get a deal. They're going to tell you they paid $400,000.

That's not what they paid. I don't know if you guys watch an episode of JRE with Rogan and Bill Burr when they discussed Hollywood accounting. Nobody remembers that conversation. Download that podcast again and take a look at that. Listen to that podcast with Joe and Bill. They're called Hollywood accounting. It always goes their way, not your way.

It doesn't go towards the actor's way. So, Joey, what does that of your beating have to do with Alex? ball with. Think about it. The girl's father who was the fucking gunsmith, whatever there's a name for it, we're not even going to go there, gunsmith, whatever like the armorer. The armor

girl, it was 24 years old. Her father's a famous armor. They gave her the job. She even said she wasn't skilled enough for the job. She was 24. She didn't feel she even didn't want

the job. There's report surfaced now that she didn't want the fucking job. But that's what they do. They cut corners. So instead of paying an armorer of five grand, what they're supposed to pay them, they take that girl and they pay her $1,000 a day. And she doesn't know what she's doing.

The same one for the guy that was pulling in the blank. The same, you know, they get a couple people that, they're like the Yankees. They're not even like the Yankees. They're like, they get a couple people, that are really good... Listen, when you shoot a movie, the DP has to be fucking great.

I could direct a movie. I don't know what I'm doing. When you see this movie, he's directed by George Clooney. Yeah, he's got a DP, you fucking assholes. What's a DP, Joy, director of photography? That's the guy that decides on the cuts, the whole thing.

Then there's another guy that decides on the budget. The director goes in there to put a hat on with a fucking fee-feet thing like he's in France. He's about to eat an apple and he's genius. But the guy that's really doing the work is the fucking DP And the first fucking camera guy And I don't know all the

You know, classy names for them But I've been on 2,000 movies To let you know that Those are the guys that are doing the work I've worked on a thousand projects where The guy is the director You're not the fucking director They just gave you that title

The guy that's running the show Is that guy behind the fucking camera And that's what a lot of fucking people don't know So when you take them And if you looked at the fucking thing It said to you that Alec Baldwin was a producer on it

and it was a low-budget movie and the reason why they give you a producer credit on the low-budget movies is so you're attached to the film it gives you extra money. They can't pay you what you want but if I make you a producer

you get extra money. As a producer, you go in there blind. You don't want to know what Mike is making. I don't want to know what Joey Dears is making. And in my heart, I hope you ain't paying them shit because I hope that money's coming to me. So when you look at this situation,

I'm not happy it happened because the girl Holly, the AD lost her job. The DP lost her life. I never made a fucking job. She lost her life. Joe Sosa, the director of the thing, got shot. He spent the day in the hospital where people are starting to read is that

you guys know there was a walkout on that move. that morning because of unsafe conditions the gun had gone off three times two days prior guys I'm not scared of anything I just don't want somebody else to win

the reason why I don't take movies in North Carolina I don't take movies and fucking anywhere else the only reason I did that TV show in Pittsburgh was because it was Greg Garcia and he was going to take care of me and I got to be honest with you He took great care of me. The production was great,

but the production they hired in Pittsburgh was inexperienced. How do I know that? Because I know what experienced people fucking do. There was a couple things they did that experienced people wouldn't do. I didn't say anything. I wasn't mad. I'm not angry at it at all. It didn't affect me in any way.

But I saw that there was a lot of inexperience. And that's what this is going to call for. You guys don't remember? There was also a horrible fucking spill. on a Marky Warburg Kevin Hart movie three or four weeks ago. The guy died or he got really bad. He fell or something like this. Guys, yes, it's COVID.

You're going to see more of these. You know, the world is in a weird place right now. I don't know if you read what Santana said that the world is vomiting right now. The world is not in a good place right now. You know, you all witness Tom Segura go down while he was about to take a fucking layup. He broke 18 fucking bones from a fucking layup. Then his wife went down. You know, Bert had surgery.

A bunch of fucking weird things have happened. Last night, I was walking in the dark, and I didn't see a fucking step, and my leg went straight down. If I wouldn't have kept my foot straight, I wouldn't be talking to you right now. I'd be getting surgery on my fucking ankle. I was so grateful because my leg just dropped.

Things are going to happen that don't usually happen in a real world. I mean, yes, people get shot on second. That's the last one being Brandon Lee in 1993 or 92 or whatever the fuck that happened. But this is what happens when you're not going to pay everybody. When you're going to have, you know, that's what they do. Did you see that we're taking people out of hotel rooms? People are filing shit. And this is why I won't take a job out of state.

I'll take a job in New York. You know why? Because if I don't like what I'm saying, I get my car and I come home. I don't bitch. I don't yell I don't complain I know what you're going to pay me up front It's not going to be a lot

I'm doing this as a labor of love But if you're not doing this as a laborer love If you're doing this just to be in a movie You're trying to push this movie And you're endangering people When you do a low budget movie You're always putting people At fucking risk guys

Because you're doing this You need $5 million But you're doing this for $800,000 because you think it's going to change your life, or you think your story that you're telling you, and your stupid fucking movie is going to do something for society that's not. And that's why people...

You know how many of fucking those $100 a day movies I've done? Let me tell you what, all those Halloween, all those dog movies I did for Disney, there were $100 a day. I did six of them. I did Boileroom. I did, if you look at my MDB, there's got to be $1,500 a day movies.

You know what? what happens now when you call me for a $100 a day movie and it's how i'm not going to lie to you guys it started in 2013 i did not have a fucking acting career i was doing all these from 2007 that's all that came out after the strike was $100 a day movies i listen i put my pants on one leg at a time i like to act i like to practice my craft if it's a great project if you come to me with a great project you're not going to wear me to fuck out i'm not going to have to be there 25 fucking hours a day for your stupidity. If you guarantee me that, I'll do your low budget project.

You can get me out of there in five or six days? I'll do it for you. But I swear to God, since 2013, I made a decision one day in like 2012. I said, I'm not doing low budget movies no more. They give you $100 a day. I got to bring my own suit. They give you $100. After taxes, it's $72, whatever it is, $78.

and you still got to give you age and $10 commission. That puts me at fucking $68. The dry cleaning for the suit, that's another $20. By the end of the fucking day, you don't make a dime. Of course, you did it as a labor of love,

but you got to take care of me. The movie Boilermank I'm talking about, I went in there one day. Three days in a row. I'm in there. They got like cheese wits. You know the cheese crackers with the cheese in the middle,

the peanut butter in the middle? they had like that and M&Ms and I'm looking at these fucking producers and then they did something that I never had heard of I'm like, what's for lunch? And they're like, when don't have lunch? They go, but you're allowed to leave for an hour. I was like, what are you talking about?

What the fuck are you talking? The last thing you want are you act is to leave because what if they get in the car accident? What if they get sideswiped? Not that they're going to get hurt, but you don't want them out. You want them to relax. Bring them their food.

Let them relax. except them get their wits to them. After three days, then they made me work on a Sunday. When I got there on a fucking Sunday, again, the table was empty. I went in my wallet. I had done the thing called, I don't know, some project about a pizza place. Again, that was the same way. The first night I got there all night shoot, there was a piece of bread on the fucking table.

That's it. With peanut butter and they brought from home, you could tell. The kids had fucking stuck their fingers in there and shit. The next night, there was a guy there from after, the place looked at the Taj Mahal. They had peaches and cranberry juice and all this shit. And I was talking to the guy

and I go, this wasn't like this last night. He goes, what are he talking about? I wasn't like this. There was nothing here. I worked 10 hours. There was nothing to eat. He gave me his card. He goes, I work for after him.

That's why I'm here. Whenever you do these movies, if they don't have the fucking shit on here, call me and I'll come and shut them down. I'm like, what? So when I got on Boilermaker that Sunday, Sunday. Now, again,

when you make me work on a Sunday on a low budget movie that means I'm doing it for your for your fucking passion it's not for mine so do me a favor if there's supposed to be food here have food but go the extra amount stop and get some bagels for the cast what's it going to cost you 30 bucks to make everybody happy to show me you're on their side on the Lord's Day no they had nothing not a donut, not a fucking cockroach, they had nothing. I went off. I'm like, you motherfucker's got an hour before I called after it. They looked at me like, what do you mean you're going to call after?

I go, listen, I'm not a crime stopper, but I'm about to join the ranks because I pay fucking union dues. I pay union dues like a motherfucker. I pay union dues every quarter, and then yearly they bang out for one and a half points of what you made all year. Not to mention the 10 points. You guys, you guys have no fucking idea. So when you guys are sitting there going, how could this happen that Alec Baldwin, listen, I feel bad for Alec Baldwin.

He's about to get a dose of fucking reality inserted in his life. He took a life. That's a dose of fucking reality. He doesn't deserve to go to jail. He didn't do anything wrong. Somebody gave him a gun, told him it was clean. Now we have to find out why he was pointing it at her, why he was pointing at him. And that's a complete different story.

But why that happened is because why I'm telling you is because why I'm sitting my ass at home money. in my fucking business. People are cutting corners. They're charging you all the dough in the world. Whether you go to a hotel, go to a hotel, go on vacation and go on their webpile. They got all the amenities. Shooshine, 24-hour valet. Wait till you get there?

Oh, the pool is closed because of COVID. We don't have a bartender because of COVID. The valets because of COVID. We don't have oatmeal in the morning because of COVID. We don't have oatmeal in the morning because of COVID. have a fucking breakfast anymore. You come down and get an apple like a prisoner and a fucking, and a fucking old fucking shop right bagel, one of those taught fucking bagels, you know,

they don't even give you that at the hotel. This is happening across the board, guys. So before you go on your fucking vacation, you know, when you do these concerts, they're charging you more than ever. Do they have special filters for your fucking COVID breathing? Fuck no. They're just telling you that. It's like the airline people.

When they started charging you for luggage. for the prices of fucking oil. Once oil went down, that they give you that $100 back or that $25 back, fuck no. That's the same thing they're doing on movies

and TV productions. That's why I'm... And then, look at, let's talk about it. They're starting to say this shit. They call it, you know, what these Gentiles call it, is the word is toxic.

Well, let me tell you something. Anytime you have a star in those movies, it's toxic. Why? Because they make a demand. If they make one demand, already, you're going to have a toxic environment. Why? Because let's say I call the producer and go, you want Joe Diaz?

Joe Diaz doesn't work nights. Now this motherfucker's got to go, okay, I got to do early fucking mornings because Joey Diaz doesn't work nights. So now I got to go to Mike. who's a fucking Mike loves to stay up late at night and draw pictures of superheroes fucking monkeys in the ass now Mike has to get up at 6 in the fucking morning for this Mike's got two kids

Mike takes his kids to school in the morning yeah he's used to but because Joey Dears wants to be there at 6 Mike loses all this now Mike has to even get his cousin who he fucking hates to come over in the morning and put the kids on the bus and give him $50 a day out of his pocket. So how do you think Mike feels about Joe Diaz already?

When he comes to the guy and he goes, listen, you're fucking up, I can't do it. Well, this is the job. You take it, you know, Joe Diaz doesn't want to work nights. So already Mike is going into that job. Kind of not liking Joe Diaz. Even though he's never met Joe Diaz. Joe Diaz is costing Mike fucking money already.

So now he doesn't like Joe Diaz. But two things could happen. Joe Dears can come in. He's a great guy. Takes care of Mike. You know, fucks around with him. They talk about music. Mike overlooks it.

Or I could come in and be a dick. And now Mike is going to tell the rest of the people what's going on with him and how I affected his fucking life. And that's going to cause a riff on the set. That's how, just by him saying he doesn't want to work nights. That's how quick a time. toxic person. As I was reading something near there by Holly Berry. I'm sure you guys wrote it.

She was doing a movie and the guy said something to when the guy was eating pain pills. He would disappear and eat pain pills as the director. And she called them out. She asked him to get help. They did an intervention on the set. And the guy was addicted to her. And Holly Berry just said, I'm getting my black ass out of here. And she was describing a toxic fucking work set.

Listen, every fucking workset set I've been on has been toxic. except the longest yard wasn't toxic Many Saints in Newark wasn't toxic Taxi wasn't toxic I was only there three days You know Spider-Man had no Nobody was toxic on there I mean whatever McGuire

Took him a little while to get out of the fucking Out of the fucking thing Because he was playing those stupid Nintendo games whatever He wouldn't they were like Where's McGuire? I don't know he's And they would yell Toby come out of it and he would go

Hold on. I almost reached the sixth universe, whatever the fuck they're going for in those fucking stupid games or whatever. But that's, you know, I've never really worked. I've worked on maybe, I'm not going to lie to you. I've worked on maybe 20 of those toxic sets, and they suck.

And you know what? Those toxic sets, I've always gone off on. You know, toxic sets, all those Halloween, all those dog movies I did, those sets were fucking toxic. Why? Because they were low budget. The producer was one of the stars in a movie and he was a fucking dick and they're just dicks. These guys are fucking dicks.

So that's what makes a set toxic is when you have fucking dicks. Now the movie I did, whatever with the movie I did about that fucking dude who lived in a hotel who in Las Vegas who was a pilot and shit. it didn't get much traction that set was fucking toxic and Alec Baldwin was in that movie in fact my scene wasn't an Alec Baldwin they probably cut it

but he's just a toxic fucking dude I'm not blaming Alex for the shooting I'm not saying he should go to jail you know we should go to jail the fucking producers the production company somebody's got to answer for that girl

obviously there was problems on that set people were dying to walk off that fucking set. So my heart goes out to Alec Baldwin for what he's going through as far as what's going through his head. You know, when you're a fucking dick full time and something like that happens,

that's what you need to fucking wake you up. Now, this would never happen if this was a regular world. You know, three people that you're getting high with and they just drop on the floor, that doesn't happen in a regular fucking world. How do I know? I did Coke for 29 years. I did Coke with a lot of, fucking people in the fucking room and never did I wake up and there was three fucking people

dead that happens in this fucking pandemic because the world is on his fucking axles all these little stupid things that you see don't let them affect you it's just what happens in a covid fucking world that's it it's just bad luck that's why i don't take any chances if you're on a ladder don't reach for the plant because you might fall the fuck off that ladder it's like i told you motherfuckers. I was at the gym one day and I went to fucking pick up like a ball with 190 pounds. I was just about to pick it up and I saw that video of fucking

Segura hitting the floor and I go this is the chances you don't need to take. Like I said to you motherfuckers, there's a movie something that interests me I'll go do it but I'm very fucking cautious. I'm very cautious at things. I just I didn't want you guys to think that I was being like fucking scared or Prima Donna. I just don't want to do them because

Why would I want to do somebody else's fucking dream for half the money? What if I go to North Carolina and somebody hits me with a dose of bad breath and has got COVID in it? And now I've got to sit in a hotel room for two weeks out of my pocket because they're not going to pay for me for getting COVID and to stay in that hotel room. And I got a fucking I can't see my family. What good am I doing for $100 a day for four fucking days? I'd rather deliver Chinese food at Setsuan. I can just call her up and go, Lily, I want to deliver four days, and I can pick up a hundred dollars.

This is what I'm saying to you guys, that you have to pick and shoes carefully right now. I'm sure you're dying to go on a vacation to some fucking, I can't wait till they lift the sanctions and I can go. Listen, if you go over there, you know, who the fuck knows what's going on over there? Yeah, I'll get back on stage in New Jersey. I'll keep it light, no second shows. But for right now, I'm not getting on no planning going, no one. There ain't nowhere I want to go. I don't want to get stuck anywhere.

I don't want to get hurt. Like I told you guys when I started this thing, I'm not going anywhere for a while. I went to California because I had to, and it was a one-day fucking trip, and I went to Pennsylvania for three days to shoot a fucking show. That's it. I don't need to go anywhere. I don't want some guy pointing a fucking BB gun at me, and all of a sudden I'm missing an eye. I don't need that shit in my fucking world. And that's what happens, man, on those fucking movies.

So if you're an actor and you get called for those fucking movies, if you need the money, I understand it. But you don't need $100 for a fucking movie. They don't need to pay you that. That's a faux part of that fucking union. You know, I'm happy to be part of the screen actors' guilt, but they've got to be looking at the screen actors guild a little bit more closely also.

It's time for people to open up their fucking eyes, you know, on these fucking sets. You know, and that's why I told producers now. And when they call me for shit, some guy just called me a few weeks ago. And he's like, hey, I want to offer you this thing. I go, okay. And he goes, can you tell me your agent's name? And I told him, he's like, ooh, you know, when you talk to those people, they want a lot of money.

I deserve a lot of fucking money. You know, why would I want them to get me money? I know what you guys are trying to do. You're trying to pay me fucking scale or under fucking scale for me to go there and chase other Italian people and talk, say some crazy shit. You got to pay now. You got to pay during this pandemic. I don't want to be on TV.

I'm not a fucking young kid anymore. I don't need to be on fucking TV. I need a job. I need a career. I would love to be on law and order full time. And why do you think I'm reaching for law and order? Because I know. Law and order's got too much to lose.

They're going to treat their sets right. They're going to test. They're going to keep us separated. They're going to put us in nice hotels. They're going to hire an armorer that's fucking, you know, the real armorer to hire. Or digital. You know, something.

You know, or don't you... First off, you don't need to fucking pull a trigger no more. Okay? All you need to do is point a gun at people. And with CGI, whatever the fuck you call it, they put smoke and they put bang! That's it. That's how...

I don't know why there were bullets or... But that's how cheap they were being, people. That's how cheap they were fucking being. So I hope that the family of this... I wish light and love to the family who lost the DP. I forget what a name is. I'm fucking so sorry. I should have wrote it to fuck down.

My heart goes out to the people on that set that witnessed that. But if you're an actor or whatever the fuck you are, cover your ass from now on. If you do take a job, ask questions. Fuck you. You're the fucking, right now they need people to work. you're not like gonna be a fucking like they're gonna hire you for dick wages and treat you like shit that that shit fucking sales if you go for a job now they need you more than that but they're hiring and experienced people they're hiring people that shouldn't even be in the fucking room for these jobs so what am i saying i'm saying that this is your chance when you take a job ask questions and if you don't feel comfortable with something don't fucking do it and tell them i'm not fucking doing it they're gonna have to hire you because what are their fucking options you got them by the fucking skinnies.

You got them by the boar hairs now. Who gives the fuck what they think? I know with me, when you call me for a movie or something now, I ask a thousand questions, and the dore me better be right, or it's not worth it for me. It's the risk my family to bring COVID back into my fucking house. Go fuck yourself.

What was her name, Mike? Elena Hutchinson, and she was really fucking good as a DP. I read a lot of good stuff about her. Even AFI is doing a scholarship after her name, you know, listen man, this shit happens, but it could be fucking avoidable. And like I said with Mike before, why did you have a gun on the set with blanks? You could do that in post production.

You could do that on his phone. This is what I'm saying to you guys. This is the, you know, and this is why I'm not doing shit. It wasn't because I was a pussy or I was scared. I'm not risking what I'm doing for somebody else's fucking passion. So they could go, yeah, thank you. Oh, you were great. get them out of the fucking room.

Then you call them a week later for a piece of your reel and they don't return your calls. This ain't my first rodeo motherfuckers. Thank you very much for watching the joint today. It was great here to talk to you guys. It was great to talk to you about better help and how it's helped me. And great to talk about people fucking cutting corners.

I can't stand these motherfuckers. But that's what you're going to do. So if you call me for an acting job, a comedy job or whatever I'm gonna ask you a thousand questions COVID questions the audience you're gonna go to me I can't do business with this guy because he gives a fuck

I do give a fuck so I'm sorry Charlie the best taste in tuna gets to be stark kiss cock suckers don't forget laughing gas partying up with packwoods we're back bitches living

high on the motherfucking hog and thank you for watching another fun filled This is the last Monday of October What the fuck The year is going Fucking flat fast The next time you see my Cuban ass

It'll be Wednesday But the next time you see my Cuban ass After that It'll be All Saints Day All Souls Day All So's day Is November 1st I'm looking forward

To fucking November That's it It was a fun-filled fucking month Have a great fucking couple days I'll see your cock suck This Wednesday morning Tip

Top McGoo, ready to go. And now for a word from my motherfucking sponsors, Jack. All right, you bad motherfuckers. I had a good time with you today. Fucking people shoot movies and not fucking want to pay you. Cock suckers. Anyway, the joint is brought to you by BetterHelp. Betterhelp.com slash Diaz is the best.

It's online therapy. The best way to think about therapies like this. You get all changes for your cars. You want to prevent bigger issues down the road. Therapy is the same thing only for your brain. Going to therapy is routine maintenance for your mental and emotional wellness. You prevent bigger issues down the road. You avoid going into hell.

I mean, guys, you guys know from listening to the podcast, I was in hell. If you have any doubts, just put on the first three months of podcast. I couldn't even have words come to my mouth. and after the surgery I was really down. I didn't know who to talk to. BetterHelp was there. I signed up. It took me five minutes.

They referred me to a girl named Dana, a woman named Dana, who helped me through the initial steps of getting out of this fear and, you know, just what I was going through, guys. I didn't know what I wanted to do, and I had questions, and I had been running it through my friends, and sometimes you just need a professional. Better Help is customize online therapy. They offer video phone,

and live chat sessions. If you don't want to see anyone on camera, you don't have to. It's much more affordable than in-person therapy, and you can start communicating when you're therapists in less than 48 hours.

Why invest in anything else when you can invest in your mind? Now, just for the joint listeners, what I'm going to do is I'm going to give you 10% off your first month. That's four visits to let you know if this is going to work for you and it will.

Betterhelp.com slash D IA-A-Z. Again, that's betterhelp.com slash Diaz. You can email them. They'll email you back. They're always there for you, and you can schedule and cancel. There's no hassles right there on the computer. Go to betterhelp.com slash diaz and get your therapeutic mind started.

You need help. This has been really heavy on a lot of people. I never thought I would be mad enough to go for help, but the pandemic kicked my ass too. So BetterHelp was there for me. So if I was you, BetterHelp.com slash Diaz Get 10% off your first month.

Now that your mind is right, it's time to sling some dick. The join is also brought to you by Blue Chew. Blue Chew is here to make your dick fucking scary for Halloween. That's what you want. You want your dick to scare people.

You know what I'm saying? Like, I went over to fucking Mikey's house. He fucked me for eight hours straight. Smoke was coming out of my monkey. That's. to go. Blue Chew is an online service that delivers the same active ingredients as Viagra and Cialis and a fraction of the cost. You could take it any time, day or night. You can wake up

in the morning, pop one of these, and put mama to work and shit for breakfast. You sign up at Bluetooth.com and talk to one of their licensed medical providers. Once you're approved, you receive your prescription within days. The best part is at all online. You don't got to leave the house. no doctors visit no pharmacy no judgment no fat chick behind the counter at CVS

eyeballing you to death with your brand new dick you know this ship's right to your door on a discreet package not even your mailman knows what's going on Bluetooth tablets are made in the US of A you're gonna give them that American

old school cock and shit you know I'm saying way cheaper than a pharmacy and it's reliable and it's fucking tremendous So if you could benefit from the next of confidence before you sling that holiday dick,

it's time to perform, bitches. And Bluetooth is going to help you. They got a special deal for you. You try Bluetooth for free with promo code Joey. That's how I'm showing up Monday, with Dick pills for free on a Monday. They just cost you $5 for shipping. Who's better than your Uncle Joey?

Nobody. If you order today, you'll have them by fucking Thursday or Friday. Halloween. Oh, my God. her fucking costume will be on fire and you have to fucking dose her off with the sperm of love.

That's Blue Chute. promo code Joey to receive your first month free. And as always, and as always, I want to thank Blue Choo for sponsoring the joint. The next one,

I love them with all my heart. Tremendous. The best supplements on the market, period. On it. Oh, and NIT. Tremendous. I was always a fan of it. But after,

I moved to Jersey, I really hyped it up a little bit with the new mood. The Shroom Tech, but then they came out with the Alpha Brain Black Label about two months ago, and it was exactly what the doctor ordered. I take my pill every morning, and I'm firing on all fucking levels. You understand me? I feel better. I feel energized. My mind feels energized.

I don't feel confused anymore. The fog has been lifted thanks to Alpha Brain, Black Label. Go to on it.com right now. Look at the great selection of products that they have, whether it's the Alpha Brain, the New Mood, the Shroom Tech Sport, the MCT. I can hook you up with supplements. I can't do anything for you with the iron, kettlebells, club bats.

But anything on this supplement, I'll get your 10% off. Listen, the reason why I've been on it so long as they stand behind their product. AlphaBrain, if you don't like it, if it doesn't work for you, you call them up they'll send you your money back and they don't even want the product when somebody does that I know that they believe in their product

and that's the people I want to do business with so go to honor dot com right now look at the fine selection of supplements order something and take of your uncle Joe we're getting stronger they got tremendous protein powder they got a tremendous protein bar

the peanut butter are great they got chips I mean honor is tremendous but it starts with you going to that page Right now, ordering some Alpha Brain and get your mind right for the fucking holidays in the new year, Cogsucker. You want to have a great November started with AlphaBrain. Go to Honet, pressing Joey and get 10% off delivered to your house. I want to thank Onit.com.

I want to thank BluChu.com. And I want to thank BetterHelp.com for sponsoring the joint. But I want to thank you fucking savages for always having my back. Have a great week. Have a great Monday. Stay Black and I'll see you, Cocksuckers. Wednesday. Tip top, motherfucking Magoo. I love you.