The Church of What's Happening Now: The New Testament - #164 - John Evan, Joey Diaz, and Lee Syatt

Episode Date: March 31, 2014

Jiu Jitsu Coach John Evan calls in to break down Eddie Bravo's Match in Metamoris 3. This podcast is brought to you by: Onnit.com. Use Promo code CHURCH for a discount at checkout. Hulu Plus. Visit Huluplus.com/joey for an extended free trial. Dollar Shave Club. Use promo code CHURCH and get high quality razors sent to your door. Escapepodtank.com Mention Joey or the Church and get $250 off. Recorded live on 03/24/2014.

The show is sponsored by Hulu Plus. Hulu Plus lets you binge on thousands of its shows anytime, anywhere on your TV, PC, smartphone, or tablet. Support this podcasting and an extended free trial of Hulu Plus. When you go to Huluplus.com slash Joey, that's Huluplus.com slash Joey. And by Dollar Shave Club.com. Get high-quality razor sent to your door each and every month for a fraction of what you pay at retail. Now, go to Dollar Shave Club.com slash church. That's dollarshave club.com slash church.

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It's that motherfucking time. Monday, March 30th. The day the devil was buried and fucked in the ass and see. It's a beautiful day to be alive. Coxuckers. Get up. Salute the flag. Grab your heart.

It's that type of motherfucking day here. Go it up, bitches. Go that motherfucker up. What's the story, baby? Nothing. Fucking Johnny's smooth over there. Looking good.

Looking good. You got a new fucking hair. Doolaroo. Look at you. I got to look every three weeks. Sure, sure. You get hair on your neck. Fucking.

I get hair everywhere. You got to go to an old school barber with the fucking raise. He's got to put the fucking thing on your neck and shave it. I don't know if it did you. thing or I don't know but you have caveman anyone who goes bald

it's everywhere but the top of my head how fucked up the time I'm gonna go bald I find hair on the pillow yeah but you're supposed to you're 50 something that's right you know what I'm but it's all my whole family the worst is the back here I got a thing to shave the back here because it's fucking gross

dollar shave club you gotta put something together you gotta give them a call say they gotta do something because with the what razor when he used to do with that can't go all the way down the back the stick you gotta get the stick with the hand you see that scratch You have a hand with a stick on it and you scratch your back with the stick.

Okay. I used to have one from my asshole, like a little stick and he's just fucking from the back. If you're a little too fat, you're mathematically inclined. You can't scratch your ass, you can't wipe your muffler. It's Monday, cock suck. It's a beautiful day to be alive. What the fuck. Fort Lauderdale was great.

Thank you. If you live in the Fort Lauderdale area, South Miami, whatever the fuck you're from, if you came to the shows last week, and I had a great time. I've always had this special thing. with Florida kind of sort of where I don't know what the fuck it is like when I get there first I'm like I'm in fucking Florida I'm in a swamp bitch

and then it just builds up and it gets beautiful and I really had a great time it's a great fucking club and that hard rock casino it's pretty interesting man it's pretty interesting that you don't really need to go to Vegas to lose your fucking mind no more the reason why Vegas is dead

I thought it was because of the economy it's not really because of the economy because these different cities I don't know which ones they exactly are, like Atlantic City, you know, whatever. They have casinos, and some of these casinos, I mean, when I was a kid, I went to Atlantic City, I'm like, fuck this. This does not compare with Vegas. This is not, I don't even know why they did this. But now, 20 years later, I'm starting to see it.

I'm very fortunate. I get to go with Joe to the fights in Vegas, you know, once or twice a year. So I was observed. You've got to observe where you're at, and you see the growth, and you see if there's cranes, and you see if there's construction going on. So when I pull into a, you know, and then when you go to a casino, I mean, sometimes you go to a casino, and the casino's job is to have everything there you're going to need. Everything. They even tell you in the fucking bathroom. You need anything.

Come down, a comb, a douche, a fucking tampon, whatever the fuck you need, they'll give you. You know, they have shopping. Whether it's expensive or not, they have shopping at the casinos, you know. They have fine dining and they also have pizzas and they have food courts. I don't know. I always get confused. I think for the two fights. They either go at the Mandalay Bay Casino or the other casino,

and there's one of the casinos that has a food court. So you don't drop $80 fucking a meal while you're there, and you've got to stand online. You can just go get a quick slice of pizza at the food court, they have a movie theater. The MGM Grant, I think. That's the one. I get them confused, so please don't quote me on this.

But I went to the Hard Rock last week, so I'm at the Hard Rock and whatever. You go down the stairs. You got the Hard Rock restaurant. You got a food court, pizza, a deli, you know, Cuban. Chinese, you've got a spa, you've got a pool, you've got shopping, you've got hard rock

memorabilia. Then you walk outside and have a complete different world. They have more restaurants, a little fancier-type restaurants. They have nightlife, they had bongos, that, you know, toy stores. They had all this shit. I mean, I walked around every day and every day I saw

what they were doing. And I kept saying, now I get it. The 24-hour kitchen I ate out, let me tell you some. It was superb for what I was getting. I was very blown away. The first thing I got that, I was starving, I just got two eggs and oatmeal at 11 o'clock at night. I don't know why. I just didn't feel like nothing.

You know, if they fuck up the eggs and the oatmeal, then there's nothing reason to eat it. And I had it, and the eggs were delicious. The oatmeal was delicious. I think one of the days I had a chop salad. It was fucking delicious, you know? But the one day, you know, let me tell you something. I live in California,

and sometimes I forget. I forget, and I don't forget. I don't forget. I don't forget. I always try to keep it as old-fashioned as I could be. And I know that for some people, a lot of people listen to a podcast, they're a little younger, and I have different fucking issues, and I have issues. You know, I hate when I go to buy something at any business, and I'm saying this, and I normally get some backlash from people. I hate when I go to fucking buy something, and there's somebody behind the counter

who doesn't understand the language. It bothers me a little bit. It pisses me to fuck off, and I don't get mad at them. they just come to America. They're looking to strive. I get mad at the people that hire them because these are the people are going to be talking to your customers.

So if people are going to come in here and they do not understand what the fuck you're talking about. Number two, if you're going to hire somebody, make them knowledgeable of the foods and how they're served and how they're prepared. A lot of people look at businesses and investments. I talked about this with the North Ridge Dairy Queen.

I went up to, me and my wife moved to the Valley four or five years ago before, or Mercy was even a thought. And one night we're on a date night, and we go, let's go to Derry Queen. And we both got Dairy Queen, and it was fucking horrific. Really? It was horrific. And we looked at the people owned it, and absolutely they were from another country.

I'm not going to mention, I'm not going to be racial incentive here. It doesn't matter. My point is that there was fucking somewhere else, and they didn't know a Dairy Queen was. They bought a Dairy Queen because of an investment. So when we went in there, we were looking for a slurpy, whatever. They're like, we don't know what the fuck it is. You know those great Mr. Misty?

with the vanilla ice cream. And I got upset and I see it sometimes. Me and my wife go to get spaghetti at this fucking horrific place in Burbank. And last time we went in there, I had to say something to my wife because I'm like, I don't fuck around with these people. They don't know what you're talking about.

They don't know how to serve spaghetti. They're from another fucking country. They don't even eat spaghetti in their own fucking culture, so they don't know how to serve it. Nobody's ever taught them how to serve it, how to fucking the presentation, you know, whether it has this or not on it. What the fuck?

So you've got to tell them, Terry. So I'm sitting there the other day, and that I'm in the East Coast. Now, one thing I love is old Jews. I love old Jews that let you know how the fuck it is, because we don't have this here. I do not have this freedom and this honesty in Los Angeles and anything that you do. I'm in the entertainment business. So the people I deal with can't make eye contact, they won't return your calls. They rather not return a call than give you a no.

That is the weirdest thing that I've ever encountered. if I go in and do something for you Instead of you going, Joey, you were not right for the part. They'll avoid contact. They'll avoid with everything altogether. So maybe somewhere down the line, they'll bump into you with a job. And you, you know, it's just creepy shit. Creepy fucking human being shit.

Humans don't treat each other like this shit. So they don't look. You know, it's just a fucking, you see these people, and you know they're fucking cunts. You know in their daily lives, they're fucking pieces of shit. but they try to keep it together. Those people I spot,

I spot those people right to fuck off when they try to keep it together because I know they can't keep it together for that long. Eventually their true fucking colors will come out. Eventually, within fucking minutes, they'll say something, you go, oh, I fucking get it now.

So that does not happen here. We don't see that here. We do not see people live through their emotions here at all. Their emotion is, people even go to church in this town as a social activity. People will switch religions just to be at a socialist.

Oh my God, you know, Jim Norton comes to this church. That's the reason people are fucking disgusting out of here. So you're at damning this food court in fucking South Florida, or whatever, Fort Lauderdale at the Hard Rock. And nothing looks good. You know, when you walk from window to window and nothing fucking looks good.

I want to go to Jedeli. I'm not in the move for a fucking corned beef, a pastrami sandwich. I go to the Cuban spot. Everything didn't look that good. and some fucking Swahelian was serving. I go to the fucking Chinese thing. That shit looked disgusting.

And I didn't want to sit in a restaurant again. I didn't want a fucking omelet. I didn't want a Philly cheese steak. I didn't want none of that shit. So I'm sitting there and I'm going from window to window to see what could yell out at me. What screamed my name? And I look over and I see this little Jewish guy. Probably like Lee's dad, like the age.

That's all. That's all South Florida is. That's all South Florida is. He's got sandals on. He's got a. No Yamaka, but his hair's a fuck up. He doesn't have a Yamacan. I can tell when I saw him, this is my man right here.

This is Jew Central. So how often does this happen? Then you see some guy? You're like, I got to stay here. I just know. I just have a feeling. I feel other people that are like me sometimes. So I'm looking at this guy and I'm like, oh, let me just see what this motherfucker is going to do.

Maybe he's going to order something that's interesting. He goes, excuse me. do you work here sir he tells this kid and i don't know what nationality this kid is i know he's not american he's not spanish he's not brazilian he's something else i don't know and he goes to the kid excuse me do you work here and he's kind of nice the guy he's opening up very nice hi i'm why you he goes you work here kid dia he goes listen i need a nice

sandwich all right he goes i want uh this on this with a little bit of this And he goes, on top of that, I want some liver. Right? Just like that, I want some liver. The guy goes, huh? He goes, I want liver. Liver, you know liver? You got liver?

It's around here somewhere. He can't find it, the guy. He's like, liver. Liver, uh, liver. You know, liver. The guy's like, liver, liver, and I'm standing right there. I'm about the way. And the guy looks at me like, can you believe this shit?

And he looks back at the fucking guy. And he goes, liver, liver. Liver, you put it on a sandwich. You know, liver. You don't know what liver is? and the guy's like, liver, liver? Like, you keep saying, I do not know. Liver, you fuck, liver.

The guy's trying to keep it together, and I can see his face getting red. He's like five foot to me. He's like, liver. I told you liver. Don't you know how to say fucking liver? Who hired you? What that? And also in the middle of his rage, he goes, where's your manager?

Maybe that fucking guy speak English, and he turns, and the door swings open. Like, you couldn't write this. The door swings open. And a guy comes out with a dot in a fucking turban. I mean, and he looks at him and he goes, liver. I'm looking for fucking liver because the guy was old. Now he's getting upset. He's liver.

I want liver on my sandwich. And the guy's like liver. And he goes like, you don't know either? What the fuck? What? Can somebody please hire somebody? It's a fucking American. And he says something in this thing.

And as he pulls away, he looks at me. We make eye contact and he goes, tell me about it. I said to him, tell me about it. Now finally somebody thinks like me. I go, tell me about it. He goes, go fuck yourself too. And he just walks away from me. nine of the ten I was told the old man to go fuck himself

but I haven't been told to go fuck myself for such a long time like that that I kind of liked it I was like I love this fucking old guy I was like yes there's finally old fucking Jews in the world he told me to fuck off that's what he said I go hey tell me about it you know because he he yelled once the Hindu came out with the turban he fucking lost it

he looked at him like I was looking for an American and they throw this fucking guy out here this is worse than Sprint because Sprint Sprint always throws a fucking Hindu at you at the end and you get them call sprint, bro. Don't throw an American out of you. To throw the fucking full court press on you, don't throw a Hindu at you, and your world is done.

Your world is done. Hello, hello, what the fuck? I'm telling you, I did not call Cambodia. And the thing is, I know these people, because that's all, okay, so for people who don't know, Fort Lauderdale and Boker-Rtoe in that area, everyone from New York, New Jersey, Boston, and that's all that is.

All the Jews go down there when they're about 70, 60, something like that. So the casino probably had a deli In New York Delacetessen But that's just because I mean my dad goes to one every week But they probably didn't have They probably had turkey and ham

That's what they had. They had turkey Ham corned beef No brisket No brisket That's why he was mad too And they have so a liver Is this like it's like only Jews Like it's really strong

You know Mitsy Shaw used to send me to the store for Tong Oh yeah Tongue her me and Ari She used to send us as Ari As Ari next time we talk I've never done tongue, but it's... Chop liver isn't that bad. It's pretty fucking strong to put on a sandwich.

You've had it? I have it occasionally. You can only really have a couple bites. I couldn't imagine smearing it on a sandwich like cream cheese. But this guy wanted it, and he was making a sandwich, and that poor guy was like, all I know is turkey, ham, roast meat, what kind of cheesy one put on it? But then again, you know, I don't know.

I just feel sometimes. And listen, you got to give everybody an equal opportunity employee. And I'm surprised the guy started out. out nice because all the old Jews I know like that they started out yelling like they started out already angry. He was angry but he was keeping it controlled I could tell he was angry when he walked up

yeah he was looking for something to fuck with him so he could run back to his wife and yell that was some shit at the penny sloths or that's the thing about casinos and I love gambling and it's just it's in me but whenever I go to a casino like that it's just like when you see like the hordes

of old people just like with the penny slots with buckets of pennies I'm like, Jesus Christ. Let me tell you what I did see this weekend. What? I was to show you. I saw it in Vegas. They told me they haven't in Vegas.

I've never seen it in Vegas. You can play war. Oh, the card game. The card game. You've seen that before? I don't know if I've seen it in Vegas. I've never seen it in Vegas. The guy goes, it's very popular.

I didn't see one person playing war all fucking weekend. But when I went and asked the guy, and I'm sad, I go, so this is just like regular war and he goes, yeah, $10 a card. I was like, ooh. That's not me. I'm a Cuban Jew. I work too hard to fucking gamble. $10 a car. But he goes

It's very popular. So I watch the table. Every time I walked by, there was never no. Not one person. I saw playing war. Probably all blackjack roulette and Blackjack? I think they don't have craps. They don't have craps or roulette. Really? In Vegas. But I did see like a machine where it's virtual blackjack. A chick is

in a computer. Hot chick and she's playing card. Can't do that. That's just going to rip you off right away. If when it's a machine they can rig it, at least when it's car you have some sort of a chance. So a couple weeks ago, like you said, You opened up the conversation. A lot of people moved down from the East Coast to whatever.

When you and I did the documentary, we went to a corner one day, and I looked at a house. And I said to you, that's the house that started my movement. That was the final straw in my decision to leave. I got accused of robbing a house. My friend called a couple weeks ago, Anthony Vanieri. Anthony Vanierry is running for freehold, but he's replacing Thomas Ligio, a good, good guy. Tommy Ligio is a good guy. father.

We'll get to this later. When I went to a couple weeks ago, I got to email a Facebook from a friend of mine. A girl that, a freshman year, I fucking went to freshman class, and she was, I was friends with a kid named Michael de Guilme, who came to this stress factory, who him and I were very tight growing up. Okay. And he had a friend named Roseanne Diagestino, and Roseanne came over. We were all, Diaz Diagostino, DeGuombe, we were all in the same homeroom in high school.

and she needed a locker. And I said to Roseanne, my freshman year, I mean, I didn't know nobody. Roseanne, if you want, you can share lockers with me. So she shared lockers with me, and it was great. I put my books on that. I didn't really. Then she had her friend. Her friend needed a lock, so she goes, my Maria Deladonna, what I think that was her name.

She's no longer with her. She died in high school like two years later. And so me and Roseanne always stayed friends. To strengthen the bond, Roseanne had a brother that I was very tight with. Me and him took a hit of acid one time and got on the bus in New York and took it all the way down. for the Jersey Shore and play the ACDC on a fucking big one of those ghetto blasters and the bus driver kept stopping going next time you put that thing on we're going to throw you off the bus 10

minutes in we put the fucking highway the hell on the guy would stop the bus I had a thousand last with Di Agostino the Agostino was crazy when I was kids so I got a call I got an email from her on Facebook a couple weeks ago saying hey I see that you're coming for a lot there I'm going to come see you I'm going to tell the girls and I didn't know what she was talking about and she said these two names and there were two girls i hung out with one of them i had an encounter with i was romantically with her for a while we were kids and the other one i was just dear friends with and we all grew up together we were all we were all in this circle later on they came into my life from 16 to 22 or something like that we were always together and then uh in the winter of 84

i was fucked up guys i was just in bad shape i i broke away from society like in june I was in love with a girl and we were dating and then we broke up and she started dating her old boyfriend and I was looking for the girl to save me. Sometimes you're not looking for a relationship. You're looking for a woman to save me. This was my ticket into, you know, having a house and all this shit. You know, in the back of my mind, I thought if I hooked up with her, you know, so whatever happened. So I went and then cocaine was pretty relevant. It was everywhere.

So I got hooked on the cocaine. I was trying to get a job, hold the job in New York. and it was just falling apart. I couldn't make it to my job at 5 o'clock. You know, somebody said that I did the Eddie Bravo podcast last night, and the people were hitting Lee, like, how's he going to wake up in the morning, bitch? If I tell you, I'm going to be there.

I'm going to be there in the morning, especially, especially for you motherfuckers. But in these days, I didn't think that way. I didn't give a fuck about anybody or their time schedule or what it meant, you know. I had no responsibility. I didn't claim any. And in that process, they hung up with this other girl

named Joy and Ligio. That was a very sweet girl. And I became friendly with her and the mother and the brothers. And one day I went to Calais. After I screwed my uncle over, the one that did the podcast. Yeah. After I tried to rob him at my gunpoint, when I got off the plane, I got a call. I called me and they go, hey, Joanne's looking for you.

So I'm trying to call Joanne. And she goes, my mom said, if you ever need a place to sleep, you could sleep here. So I immediately went over there. God forbid I wouldn't pass up an opportunity to sleep in somebody's house for free and mooched their fucking food in those days, you know. wouldn't have to cover that shit. I would just have the money to snort. God forbid.

So I stayed with them. I think I moved in with them October, like the end of October around Halloween. And I stayed with them until like the first week of December. And I got to tell you, people, it was eight, six weeks. I didn't make any effort to change my life. You know, sometimes somebody put you on a couch and they say, Joey, this is you, open the refrigerator to all you.

All I want from you is to wash your dishes and do me a favor, bro. get up in the morning and go get a job go get a job to help yourself out so in six to eight weeks you get an apartment here you can stay here for free I'm not going to charge you today you've done it with people you can stay here for free

I don't want nothing from you all I want you to do is wake up an eight keep this clean I don't want no fucking you know don't put drama in my life but most important if I'm going to give you this opportunity two or three months to live rent free get a job

you think I got a job fuck no I want it to be Johnny Coke dealer I wanted to be Johnny Coke dealer and Johnny Mafioso and sell coke and burn people. So one day, one day, like December 12th, I never forget the date. She comes to me and she goes, you got to go.

Just out of the blue. She goes, I'm throwing you out. You haven't made any effort to fucking do anything with your life and you haven't stopped snorting coke and that, and it was true. I'm not here to tell nobody I wasn't. And I took my little army bag. In those days, I had an army bag filled with clothes and a couple pictures.

And I fucking just lived on this. streets. That was one of the last three weeks of December when I basically just lived on the streets. Now, you talk about the East Coast being cold. I lived on the streets. I took my luggage to a friend's house and I would pick through clothes at night and change and take a shower wherever I could. It was just a horrible living. It was a horrible way of living. So I hit rock bottom December 31st, 1984. I robbed this kid, Joel. I went to a hotel and it snowed a lot. It snowed like two feet of snow. And I knew they were going to come get me. I had like 2,000. thousand dollars of that money and I called my teacher mr.

Taranova that's called the podcast and he picked me up and I left that area forever and that was it I got my life I went up to mr. Tees and I tried to I stayed clean and About three weeks in I get a call I call a friend of mine and they're like dog what the fuck did you do And I go what are you talking about and they go The cops aren't looking for you but somebody robbed Ligillo's house and They know it's you man and I go dog are you fucking kidding me

I haven't even at that time when the Ligio house had been robbed I wasn't I was never even in that area I owed $20,000 my step my godfather was looking to kill me my stepfather was gonna kill me

God knows who else was looking to fucking put a bullet in my fucking leg trust me I wasn't gonna go back to West New York North Bergen whole book none of those fucking spots so he tells me this and he's like bro you robbed the house

and I fucking called another friend of mine and they're like you're like Yeah, we got the call last night. When they were at the football dinner, somebody broke into the house and took all the jewelry and shit. Now, the other part of the story was that Joanne Leggio's mother

was a degenerate card gambler. And I knew, because I knew people in Hoboken, I knew different people, that she owed money. She owed money, and she had been borrowing money from her daughter's college fund. I knew all these things. I knew them. You know, the daughter didn't know, the husband didn't know.

This was before he became a freeholder. This was when he was down and out. He had lost his job at Pepsi. So I get this call. You know, you robbed the house. And I'm like, I didn't love no fucking house, you know. But it didn't matter. Listen, I had everything against me.

I had no real alibi. You know, T was like he's here with me. So what did I do? I call the chief of police in North Bergen, who I knew dearly. I hung out with his son. And I said, Mr. B, you know, I've known you a long time. I've eaten at your house.

Listen, I've done a lot of bad things. I robbed this. I did this. You know that. He laughed. I go, but this thing I didn't do. If you want me to come down and give a statement or get fingerprinted or whatever. And he goes, listen, something ain't right, but I'll get back to you later.

So I guess that they broke in, but there was no real breaking. There was no, that's why she thought it was me because there was a key. I never really had a key to the fucking. house. I just knocked and then let me in or I had the back door was open because the two boys. So they accused me a rob in the fucking house. So this is all over the place now. And I'm trying to fight back. I'm trying to call everybody. Now why for someone who's done all that stuff, why did it bother you so much? It bothered me because I didn't rob it. At that time, everything that got robbed was me. Every time. And then a week later they go, oh no, it was the sister. And I get

fucking, you know, somebody robbed somebody and then I would get a call, hey, bro, did you hear what happened downtown? They broke into whatever's house. And then a week later, it was three Puerto Rican down the corner. So I would always get vintageized. Okay. Vindicated. So even though you were doing it

when you didn't do, you're like, it wasn't me. There was a point where everything that somebody did, it went back to me. If I was even in that fucking area, and sometimes I was responsible for it. And sometimes I wasn't. For some reason, guys, this one really bother me. This was at the tail end of a part of my life when I was in bad shape.

And when she threw me out, it hurt me, because I thought she was my friend. I knew a lot of shit about the mother, like I'm telling you right now. I knew a lot of shit about the mother, and I thought we were good friends. And I understood her throwing me out of the house. Hey, I understood that. I wasn't mad about that at all. This went on, and it ain't away at me. It ain't a way at me that she thought I robbed the house. You know, and I knew the truth. I knew that it was an insurance camp for her to get the cash back. And I knew a lot of little things. You know, she had pulling the jewelry.

She was getting her jewelry estimated. So I knew something was in the horizon, you know. And I got to tell you, it really bothered me. But it made me who I am today. So this went on. This rumor went on. And I called one of the girls, not Roseanne Diagostino. This is 85.

I called one of the girls. And her and I remained friends for a while, even though she was tight with Joanne Ligie. This girl, Tasia and I, remained friends for a while. And then Tasia got into her own hassles, her and her boyfriend killed a couple driving. It was fucking crazy. It was dreaded with drunk. Tasia got vindicated, but the boyfriend ended up going to jail.

And I left. I left. No, right before, I didn't leave yet. And her and I were very tight, this girl, Tasia. But as time went on, our relationship, and it was because of the Joanne thing. Now, the other girl, who I was romantically at one. time with Lisa. I called her one day. Me and my buddy were thinking of taking a vacation.

I called her one day and I go, hey, me and my buddy were thinking to take on a vacation, I want you to sell me the package. And she put me on hold, and then she picked the phone. She goes, listen, I've got to tell you something. I really don't want to do this for you. I really don't ever want to talk to you again. I can't believe you robbed Joanne's house. She goes, this is the end of the last conversation

will ever have. And that really destroyed me. Because we weren't romantically involved then, but I considered her a friend. In a way, not really. You know, I knew what it was. know what time it was. So eventually within time, they both stopped talking to me. And that really bothered me.

And today, I could look you in the eye. I mean, we discussed a lot of things on this podcast. I didn't remember that fucking house. It wasn't even in my realm at that time. I was trying to get out. I was trying to really, like, that's it. I had gotten away with murder. Yeah.

So why would I want to fucking go back, you know? So when Roseanne hit me up a few weeks ago, she told me, she goes, I want to come to your show. My husband, I go, no problem. I go, but listen, I'm dirty. You know, I just guys want you to know. I know the style of comedy you like, because you always post what comedians he goes to see.

Okay. So when I was down this weekend, I didn't even think about it. But when I hit her back with the message, she hit me back that she was going to invite those two girls. Okay. Those two girls all live in the same neighborhood with other people from my hometown. Wow. So I told her, and I never heard back from her.

You know, she probably went to those two girls and said, he's coming, and they go, are you fucking kidding me? don't you remember what he did Did it bother me, bro? A little bit. It bothered me. If you know anything about me, it really didn't bother me.

But it just struck me while that I had the relationship I had with this girl. Even if she went to them and they told her that, I thought that this girl would at least go. You know what? You guys don't want to go? Let me go. Me and him had a friendship at one time.

But I guess, like I said, the other girl that had the lock that died in the car accident. I remember we all went to the wake and I was very tight. So it just goes to show you. So it never came out, that it was the mom doing, like it never came out. I never really wanted to attack it. At that point, you know, I was living, this happened January of 85. I left New Jersey in June of 85.

But that time she had gotten a check. Then I bumped into her one day in 93. I went home. I bumped into that political function, but the people I were with throwing heat, she couldn't say nothing to me. They looked at me. They gave me dirty looks, but I gave me dairy looks back. At that time, I didn't give a fuck.

But I would have gone up to it, looked her in the face and said, I know what you did. It wasn't me. I know what you didn't. I'm not mad at you. You know, if I would have robbed the fucking house, I would have got arrested for it. Yeah. If it would have really been me, if they would have had witnesses and proof and I would have sold the jewelry, where'd the jewelry go?

You know what I'm saying? At those days, you could track jewelry still. You could track it. Where did the jewelry go? As soon as they put an alert out, the feds or the cops send fucking paperwork to all those, they faxed paperwork, to all those jewelry stores, and if they're looking for 50,000 worth of jewelry, like they said they robbed.

She said she had like 50,000 worth the jewelry, which she really had. She probably didn't have. But that pain that that brought me, fueled me. It fueled me. And remember when we shot the documentary, we shot it. I had that piece in there. I never aired it because I didn't want to make the documentary negative.

I didn't want to show you. At first when I had the plans to shoot the documentary, our plans to take it to the places I robbed and stuff, I didn't want to show you the bad things. I wanted to show you the good things. And that's why I did that. I had that piece in there. Remember, you shot me.

You shot it right in front of the house. This is the house I got accused of robbing. Blah, blah, blah. And today I really don't give a fuck about them. I feel bad that we don't talk. I feel bad that they fed me at one time and I don't have a relationship with them. I'm sure they see the articles.

They put in my hometown paper about me and I don't know how they feel or whatever, but I really don't give a fuck. That made me, that gave me the few. That accused, to be honest with you, you know, it's like having a jar of mayonnaise and you're trying to open it. And you can't open it and you're working it for an hour. And then your grandmother comes in who's got arthritis in her fingers. And she goes, and she cracks the fucking can.

Yeah. That situation was the catalyst. It was responsible for setting me out in the world. Yeah. Because that's what made me want to prove that I wasn't that person. So I keep that theft close to my heart, that accusation, because. because it fueled my rage. Oh, yeah, man, I can see you.

It fueled my fire. It really fueled who the fuck I was because I didn't care about it. I robbed a lot of shit. I'm not here to tell you I did not rob shit. I was a petty fucking piece of shit thief. But that I didn't rob. I had a little bit more class than to rob somebody who had helped me at that time. You know, they weren't involved with drugs.

They weren't heavies. They didn't do nothing like that. So they were out of my reign. Yeah. You know, all those people that helped me were always safe. You know, that's why the people, you know, loops and Ascalises and the Villanos, those people were my brothers.

They stuck with me through thick and thin. In those days, I'm the same animal today. If you don't stick with me through thick and thin, I don't want you around, you know. It was interesting because I worked with two comedians in Fort Laudale this week. One of the guys I knew from L.A., and, you know, when I used to do the podcast with Felicia,

she used to have this fucking friend this uh this jeff uh i don't know what his fucking name was uh he he books montreal or some shit now you know he books montreal jeff i don't know what's fucking name is and it's funny because this kid said to me he goes you know joey man i'm watching you on stage and everything's working out and he goes years ago fuck you had a lot of people that would really down on you and he goes this guy especially and I remember Felicia he was at Felicia's one guy and I shook his hand but I knew

first of all the guy is a gay guy that he needs a push I know those guys that are the fucking flaming inside but they just need a push like so they need a guy to grab him by the neck and go so now you're going to suck my cock and I'm gonna set you I'm gonna crum what's that word when you

break a woman out when you what's a pimp say I busted her out and shit like I turned her out oh yeah that's what he needs a guy to turn him out okay And it's funny. He booked, I forget, Jeff, whatever. I think Stanhope had a problem with him too

because the guy used to charge classes to teach stand up and Stanhope went after him. And it's funny that this kid came up to me. He goes, you know who really, every time I'd see him, he'd say, stay away from Diaz. He's in trouble. He's no good, you know? And the type of shit like that bothers me a little bit.

Yeah. Because these are the people that talk to the mainstream people. And I know that half of these fucking morons are a bunch of, you know, they don't like dealing with me half of them because I tell him the truth. I tell them how I feel And that's not what they want to hear Oh my God, it's such a pleasure to be

No, it's not a pleasure Because I know you don't give a fuck about me You have to do this because you have to do this shit But it's so funny how these people It's tough to live your life You know, and you make your own bed, man I made my own fucking bed I'm not here tapping out or crying

Or, you know, I got a bunch of fucking things This week from people You know, things ain't going my way Then you gotta work a little fucking harder By guy, you got to go it up Go that motherfucker up on a Monday Go it up and go for it you know but i've done a lot of things one of my goal was one of my goals was always to

listen you're not going to overcome you're not going to change people's minds you're never going to once a person has a perception of you or whatever you're not going to change their mind the only thing you could do is keep pushing forward and eventually even if they don't like you they had a look at you and go that motherfucker's a savage you know maybe i don't like this but his character is spot on and that's all I always wanted to be. I always knew to redeem myself from what I had done all those years my character was in. I always

had character. I always had fucking character. If not I would have robbed them. I always had character. Not I would have robbed them right there at fucking gunpoint. But that's what I always strive for to build my character so that somebody could say, and I don't have these people don't like me, these comic people and you know what?

Everything don't give a fuck. That's the reason why I'm here. When I walk in the room, I walk in the room, cock in my fucking hand i don't give a fuck i'm not scared of these motherfuckers and i that's why you know this podcast is ha ha he sometimes but on fucking monday mornings i come in here fueled up and it's just to let you know that you know what man who gives a fuck somebody this morning hit me up and i want to go to my job or i don't like it should i quit and i go you can't quit your fucking job but you know what go in and give it a shot if somebody don't like you having a problem with your boss go and then let

know you're fucking better than they are that's the only way they're gonna give you the fucking props and even if they don't like i don't give a fuck i don't want to go to your house to watch TV. I don't want to go eat with you to hang out with you. Fuck you. But you will fucking respect me. You will fucking respect what I do. And you will respect how I fucking compose myself and how I handle myself.

And that's all you want from people. I don't give a fuck. I don't want no thank yous or no hugs, nothing. I just want people to know this guy's a hard worker. He works hard. He does what he says he's going to do. And he fucking comes through. And that's the most important thing, man.

Well, did you hear what happened? It's interesting you brought this up. Did you hear what happened in football this weekend? No. So the Philadelphia Eagles released a... a wide receiver named Deshawn Jackson. So, and they released him, right, like, the day an article came out saying that he hangs out with gang members.

He grew up in Compton. And what he's saying is what all the police have come out and said is, when you live in a place like that, you're going to grow up and you're going to know people who end up like that. So they released him. He didn't do anything. It's not like Aaron Hernandez who killed somebody. They released him, and they said he had some issues,

he didn't get along with the coaches or whatever. But they released him before he did anything. And he went out saying, like, I'm not a bad person. And it's a, like, it's kind of like what you went through a little bit. Like, how, what, what would that feel like if, if, like, a comedy club or your agent now is, like, he hangs out with bad people or he did this in his past? And then it kind of affects you. It's kind of like what happened to that UFC fighter a little bit, but he did something. So Deshaun says something.

It hurts. It hurts. I'm not going to lie to. It hurts. for a minute. It hurts for a level. It hurts for as long as you let it hurt. Okay, people always remember that.

This shit's going to hurt for as long as you had let it hurt you. A situation affects you. It's going to affect you for as long as you let it affect you. Listen to my fucking words because I live with this every fucking year. Every fucking day. When I was Spanish and I first moved to North Bergen, in every level. you know, my insecurities weren't

fucking a man-made. I'm not a guy who's going to tell you that I hadn't had opportunities because I'm Spanish. That's bullshit. I've never even looked at that. I've never even categorized myself as that. I categorized myself as a fucking man. I know I got to go out there and get something every day. But when you hear something

negative about yourself or something that somebody's taken out of perspective or something that somebody has made a bad call on you, it hurts if you let it hurt for a minute. Then you sit there, you reflect, You grab your cock and you go, you know what? Fuck this bitch.

This is the gasoline that goes in my fucking tank. Yeah. Okay, that's how I look at it. When somebody says something, like I told you one day, nine of the ten, most people go up to people go, hey, I heard you said that. I don't say nothing. Because if somebody's going to say something like that about you,

knowing the efforts that you do, they're saying it from an insecure place, or they're jealous, or they don't understand. I don't even like that word jealous, but they don't like it or whatever. You don't want? If they're that weak, they know you're going to fuck their mind. that you know I mean in my world when I get that shit it hurts for 10 seconds and if I didn't tell you

I'm lying to you it hurts it hurts for a minute it might hurt for a day it might hurt but then something takes over you and goes you know what I'll take that person and you wipe my fucking ass with them it's shit in my ass you know when you take that first shit how you take that toilet paper and wipe your fucking ass that's what I'll do with that fucking head as their tongue is scraping my asshole and they taste the shit from my fucking ass that's how you have to think about those fucking people and you don't say nothing to them you don't know even give them the time of day you let them living their life you let them live

their life like if they know what the fuck they're talking about and meanwhile you're digging you're digging you're moving fucking street because listen bro it's like the fucking man setting off in an apocalypse now I'm in this fucking hotel hanging here and Charlie's in a bush getting fucking stronger I've always been Charlie in the bush getting fucking stronger so you could sit there with your little fucking Gentile buddies ha ha ha and and S. An Night Live and hanging out the improv and try to be cool and put whoever the fuck you want down. But meanwhile, motherfucker, Uncle Joey, aka Charlie, that bitch is in the bush, motherfucker,

with a gun and a fucking scope and a bag full of fucking bullets. I want to be around this Monday. March fucking 30th, the day the devil was buried in sea. Anybody say something about you you, don't feel good? Fuck them. It only hurts for a fucking minute. And then you tell him, suck my dick, bitch. Out of respect, Tony Ben on a fucking Monday, cocksuckers.

I want to be around To pick up those motherfucking pieces Who gives a fuck? When somebody breaks your heart Some somebody twice as smart As I A somebody who to be true

as you used to do with me who'll leave you to learn That misery loves company So it's crazy I didn't even feel the earthquakes this weekend I don't know what it was but fucking You were fucking

No I wasn't You were eating that ass like a fucking Mexican soldier Beforehand yeah but Fuck I didn't bring in the corner I'll bring in the corn to it tomorrow Well, make you think of the corn, that we'd open up my son. No, because he said Mexican. We were before, but no, not during.

We didn't feel either one. And I called Terry because I knew you were in Florida. I was like, fuck. Yeah, people called me right away and said, call home that there was an earthquake, so that's a type of people I'm fucking involved with. You want me to tell you why I feel good today? Why?

Because I took that on at 180. Okay, that one happens? I took that shit before and after the fucking plane, man. They sent me a big box of it, and I'll tell you what, I'm tired. I'm a little tired today. I'm not to take it easy. I don't have a big day.

So I don't know how to go to 11 to 12. I thought I had to go to the library with my daughter. They do like a read story time. I was going on there and see what's going on. Torture some motherfuckers. Read some books and shit. They had that elementary school. Like you could come in and the parents would read a book.

And my dad did it once and he took it really serious because he was on the radio. So he listened out with his big radio voice. I can definitely see going to kindergarten reading some stories to some kids. It's a mommy and a mom. me group on Mondays and Wednesdays, but it's not for the next two weeks, so it's on Wednesdays. Oh, okay. That's why I was going to do the podcast Monday, Wednesday, 11,

but I got to go to storybook fucking reading time. So that's what it is. What the fuck it is? But that's why I felt good. I could tell that I never used to take, I never take Alpha Brain before I go on a plane ride, but the 180, I take a little thing right there, right on the plane. As soon as I got in, the guy goes, you want water?

Boom, I open up the package, dimple in there. drink it and then when the plane lands I'd do another one and I'm fucking good like I never really have jet lag yesterday I slept for two hours but it wasn't it was because I was tired you know I went to a fucking two and got up at five and you went through a period a few months ago where you're getting a lot of ear things and you're getting sick for a while

so you might like you've been taking that for like on the plane yeah because you've been like what six seven weeks in a row now or close to it oh no I don't fuck around but it was very weird I'm taking a lot better I know how to do the road down a lot better so there's little precautions you take the immune this

Yeah, I take the immunes. I take the shroom tech, the other one, not the sport, but I take the other one. The immune. So, you know, you got on a plane, six, seven hours, you got to have, you got to protect yourself. I heard they make this, I was talking to a buddy in mine from Australia last night. He says they make this thing that you buy at the airport and you drink it every hour or something like that for your body. It puts a lot of vitamins in your body. You know, when you fly, there's radiation on planes.

There's so many fucking things on planes. And I fly twice a week, so you have to take a little fucking carry yourself, people. And that's the word of the day. Take care of yourself. It only hurts as long as you let it fucking hurt. Yeah. It's crazy because, like, and I would love the Patriots to grab them, but they won't do it because of Aaron Hernandez.

And at first when they brought it up, I'm like, yeah, I guess you can see, like, after what happened, you would let him go just so he, if anything happened. But, like, the article, it's kind of, where, it's kind of why newspapers are going down. The article didn't have any proof. It just said he hangs out with people who are already. in that but that shouldn't be illegal that shouldn't be a reason for you to lose your job and it's uh mark cuban the owner of the mavericks he came out a week or two ago and he said that uh in like 10 years the NFL is gonna go downhill because they they're they're doing a whole other

night of football now it's like Wednesday nights two and and then more more games on thursdays and you know it might be it might be fucking true he said that like when people get too greedy people like things bad things happen so it's kind of interesting so they're going to start Wednesday night football? I don't know about Wednesday. They definitely added more Thursday night games and like now CBS is careful of them and pretty soon it's

going to be every night of the week. I think it's on Wednesday night of games. Now this kid that got Deshawn Jackson, was he a rookie last year? No, he was like four years in. He had his best year last year. Okay, so after his best year, so they cut him

or they released him because he doesn't get along with the coaches. Maybe he has a chip on his shoulder. Yeah. But because he has gang acquaintances. Well, he's from South West. Yeah, he's from Compton. It's not that he's in a gang.

It's that his friends, who we grew up with, and I wouldn't have even realized it, but when I go down and drop hall off, in those neighborhoods, there's fucking gangs. And it's just some of the people who live there are very nice, old people, and some of the people are gangs, and it's just when you grew up in those

areas, you're going to have friends you go to school with that are in the gangs. That's what they said, and it's... Listen, when I went back to fuck in the stress factory, I realized I had some friends that were heavy duty myself. Yeah. That over the years, they, you know,

just week in Florida. Some guy came up to me and he goes, I'm your friend's partner in the book business. Jesus. You know, a kid I grew up with. And I knew he had a partner. The guy goes, my name is this, and I'm his partner.

I've been with him for 20 years now, and he couldn't come, but he sends his love. I'm down here. So, you know, when I went to the stress factory, I saw a couple motherfuckers I had been in high school with that now, you know, things but now and a couple

them told me man they were like bro we got your back you need anything you know you want to perform here you want to do this we could take care of you so I took their cards and their phone numbers and uh... this is who I grew up with this is who the fuck I am you're not going to abandon them now no I don't give a fuck I'm gonna fucking abandon them

they never abandoned me yeah one guy I saw that I did a thousand things with and I always knew who he was that's why I did the things with him because I knew I would never get in fucking trouble so we got a call coming all right it's my life little brother John Evan.

How's it going? Good, man. I'm happy you woke up to do this for us again. John Evan on the line one of my one of my fucking coaches who I love dealing with Jiu-Jitsu fucking Savage. He has a YouTube page and he has a breakdown page and

I'm going to talk about Eddie Broadwell. How are you doing today, Mr. Evan? Oh, doing well. Doing well. You got to get up early for this show, huh? Yeah, we get up early, man. We want to get to you first. We want your information out there first John Evan you know what I'm saying that's great

it's a good way to wake up no I woke up I went to bed at like 12 so I was tired when I woke up at a 430 but you gotta do what you got to do John Evan fuck it no for sure you know people people you know I get emails every week in some weeks I get emails

from people that you know things aren't going well for them they've been and I ask them you know do you get up early do you try a little harder do you and this is it this is you get up a little early some days you're right you know and the whole days in front of you so yeah that's it john evick john emmon i'm watching these uh these fights dey and i thought about you the whole night when i was watching metamores three i i felt like you were right next to me you know and because you've

taught me some stuff and i didn't uh know a lot of the high level stuff i was seeing watching but uh that's why i have you on to you to break it down and we'll break down eddies because that was the main one people are still talking about you guys and i'm still talking about today. A couple weeks ago, you and I were doing something, you were teaching me a few moves. And you mentioned to me something that Kenny Thorium mentioned the other day. He goes, you know, Eddie's known for his rubber guard and this and this,

but his real world is his grappling in his side control. Yeah, and his half guard too. Right, the half guard. I'm sorry, not side control, his half guard. And we saw it the other night. Break it down for me, John Evans. Yeah, I mean, If any of you haven't seen that Mita Morse event, I highly recommend you watch it.

I mean, it's just not often you get to see high-level grappling put into such a nice production. Like, you know, you can go to the world, and if you're there in person, it's really something to see. A lot of the people come up from Brazil, some of them chant at each other, and it's crazy. But if you're there live, you're not going to see it with any kind of commentary. if you watch the live stream, you can see some commentary. And that helps a lot. It helps give context. But unless you do the sport, the commentary has to be really good to give it context.

Because otherwise, I think that's the problem with Jiu-Jitsu, with sport Jiu-Jitsu. It's really hard to convey what's going on in the match unless you've seen it before. Because there's no way that you can tell. for instance, pressure. Like, there's no way the camera can show that. So, you know, maybe you've got two humongous guys, like, say, like, I don't know, somebody as big as Verduem who's going to be fighting for the, in the UFC, hopefully for the UFC heavyweight title pretty soon.

He trains at my gym sometimes under my coach Cabrini, and he's a humongous person, just very big. And once you're that big, if you put a shoulder, on someone's face and have a really strong cross face on them, that can be so much pressure. It feels like your head's going to pop off, but on camera, there's no way to tell that. So you really need good commentary to give it context.

And the last couple of Metamoruses, I didn't think, really had that so great. But this time they had Kimmelian, who competes for UFC, so he's an old hat at it. And then he also had Jeff Glover, who is one of the best American graphics. Applers and just an all-round good guy too. So the two of them really, I think, helped brought that across to the audience. So you didn't have to be such a Jiu-Jitsu nerd.

You can be kind of more of a casual viewer and still see what was going on. But the match was fantastic. I mean, this one is, it's a rematch. They fought once before, I think, in like 2003. Was it 2003? I think so, ADCC's, right? Yep, it was an ADCC, so it was Nogi, and that was the big deal about this fight.

Hoyler was, if you don't know who he was, he is one of the Gracies. He was named, I think, by Gracie Mag, which is a huge jiu-jitsu publication. It's been around for a long time. He was named as the best grappler of the 90s, I think, by his personal. peers and just buy the magazine maybe. They took a boat and he was the one. Best grappler of the 90s. So a big deal.

And he's a smaller guy too, you know, one of the much smaller weight classes. But known also for his passing, which typically you don't see that at the smaller weight classes. A lot of people play guard more, so they're on the bottom more. But he has very good, also a very good guard,

but very good passing too, especially for the weight class. Really technical. good athlete on top of it, and he went into ADCC where he was fighting Nogi, and Eddie Bravo caught him in a triangle and beat him. And a lot of people said, oh, it was a fluke, you know, like it's not going to happen again. I don't think either of them competed after that. I might be wrong, but I'm pretty sure that neither of them ever competed again after that. So a lot of things left to speculation, and people saying that Eddie was making his career out of this one fight. He just got lucky and all of this.

And, you know, it was really, it was an interesting match to make. And everybody wanted to see them rematch, but they never did. And now years and years and years later, they finally did. And it was a fantastic match. Really, really good. Unfortunately, spoiler alert, if you haven't seen it yet, it went the distance. so because it's supposed to be submission only, but there was a 20-minute time limit. So, you know, still you can argue it either way, but I mean, I think most people that were there, even to the casual fan,

they could see that, I mean, one way, if you're not sure who's winning in a grappling match, you can look at who's defending more and who's attacking more. And Hoyler was on top for a lot of the fight. I think for the whole first five minutes, he was on top and good. passing position, trying to get a knee through the pass, a knee through the middle pass to work, but not able to get it to work. And then Eddie was able to utilize his lockdown. And for me, that was the, that was kind of like the most surprising and in a way the saddest part of it, too,

because the lockdown is not just Eddie's moves. The Eddie kind of popularized it, but it's a common jiu-jitsu move, and Hoyler seemed to have no answer for it. He didn't know how to get out of it. He wasn't doing the right stuff. He was straightening his leg most of the time, which is the opposite of what you want to do. And he looked a little lost. And because of that, he got swept a few times. He swept back and he stayed on top. But in the end, he got put into a couple of different compromising positions where he was nearly in a cast crusher and then also nearly in a neck crank. And he was in danger of being put into a Twister, which is also in that crank.

And, you know, if you have to look at it that way, he was defending. He was never putting Eddie in danger of being submitted. So I would definitely have to give this fight to Eddie. And I'm not biased either way. I really have no affiliation with either of those two camps.

So it was just a good fight. And I would have loved to see it with no time limit for sure. Just go till somebody passes out? I think so You know even though you could argue that that favors Hoyler

Because he seemed to be the better athlete out of the two Even though Eddie was still pushing pretty strong towards the end That's the only real way to leave it To get a definitive answer It's submission only The only problem with submission only Is that when you do it with no time limits Most matches sure

they're going to end in five minutes, they're going to end in 10, maybe 20, sometimes 30, but every once in a while you'll get that match that goes like an hour and a half long, and it's just unwatchable for the casual spectator. And even for the hardcore spectator, especially if it's more of a stalling game, if it's like an hour and a half, it's hard to make time in your day for that, and especially if there's like five more matches. And how do you schedule that, too, if you're an event organizer? or so. That's kind of the conundrum with sport

jiu-jitsu right now. These rules are, in my opinion, much better than rules for, say, like the IBJF with the worlds, where they give you points for sweeping, takedowns, you know, passing the heart, all of that. It doesn't matter. There's no point. No points.

Just you submit or you don't. So that way it becomes much more pure jiu-jitsu, I believe. But also, then you run into that No time limit issue. So it can be hard to run a tournament that way. I really saw one of the thing that night that I think a lot of people saw unless you're crazy. There's something there.

I could watch one of these once a month. I would pay to see these live. I would go down. I would have paid the $100 to go down there that night. I think they're very interesting, John Evan. I think they're a little more like the way they did this show, compared to like a tournament that I've been to like the time I only been to one with you at GMAC that day

VMAG, GMA, but I liked how they did it I could see this on pay-per-view once a month I think that there's a market you know what you so what you got kicked out of the UFC you're a fucking black belt and jiu-jitsu why just open up a school you know you could jitzu wise till you're fucking 60 you know that right John Evan especially if you've been doing it for 20 years at 40 years

absolutely that's the beauty of jiu-jitsu and uh you know that's i mean you could see that here and people wanted to see people paid money and it was the main event to see these two guys that were nearly 40 right uh i think coilers are 48 and eddie's 43 that's that's that's we yeah exactly that's fucking we are eddie's nearly nearly 50 right uh yeah 48 years old and you know they're not not like these are not athletes in their prime and watching these two guys and first of all too what amazing athletes for being well into their 40s especially for hoiler and being able to go 20 minutes being in a match which are being videotaped and both of the you can't imagine the pressure on these guys like if you've never competed before and you know it's a completely different thing

But also, when you get to that level, Eddie Bravo owns that the 10th planet system. Like, if you see a 10th planet out there, it's associated with Eddie Bravo. A lot of pro fighters in the USG come to him. You know, Hoyler Gracie being named, he's a Gracie for one. So it's a lot of pressure right there. Like, you can't be a Gracie and be bad at Jiu-Jitsu. It's just not accepted. And also being named the best fighter of the 90s.

He's a legend. The son of Helio Gracie. It goes on and on. So much pressure. And you have all these students and everyone looks up to you. And you get out there and you haven't competed in 10 years. And, you know, you have an adrenaline dump. And you still not being athletes in the prime, they went out there and they put it on the line.

And they just really went for it over 20 minutes and had an amazing chili. I thought it was awesome. And that's so hard to deal with for, you know, the average 20-year-old would have a really, hard time with that, but they pushed the pace all the time. It was an exciting fight, which is more than even safe for a lot of fights. And, man, I don't know. I thought it was great. Like I said, you know, you've been teaching me for the last nine months,

and I watched some stuff that night that was just amazing. I had never even seen before. I don't know what they were doing. You know, one thing I learned from you was patience, John Evan. A couple weeks ago, we were messing around, and I said to you, you're going to teach me a north-south choke and I'm fucking 300 pounds and you're barely 160

and I laid on top you and I can hear your fucking ribs crushing but you're like no no you're okay and I'm like what I love this guy and you fucking you know you had patience you're like okay he's 300 pounds there's nothing I can do about that

all I could do is keep my composure breathe and I'm gonna get out of this and you fucking did this little shrimping shit and the next thing you know you were out of it Do you know how long it took Eddie to get that lockdown last night? It was a while before he could get in. It took him five fucking minutes to get the lockdown last night.

So he first got the one hook, he said, the black mom. And then he went for the lockdown. And he goes, it took him five minutes to get it. That's patience. And then he spoke about the electric chair, how he works on that a lot. But he goes, you know what? He was surprised that Hoyler wasn't. prepared for the electric chair

whatever they call that shit but he said even then like he goes he goes it's a move that you have to you know it steps he goes it steps and there's one point where jack what was the name not Kenny Florian but the other guy was Jeff Glover Jeff Glover said that

Eddie wasn't known for his cardio but he was very technical where Hoyler was more of an athlete yes that's true Yeah, that fight, it was crazy. Hoyler was in a very good knee-through-the-midthru-the-middle passing position, and the part for me that was a little bit sad was either Hoyler has not updated his game enough since maybe he was last competing,

which has been a while, or he just didn't give Eddie the respect that he deserved, and didn't study up on him because that lockdown is pretty common. And anyone that knows Eddie and knows anything about his game, like it's pretty common knowledge that he uses the lockdown a lot, and especially from Halfguard. Also, I mean, Heady just jumped right into Halfguard from the get-go. But Hoyler, I would have loved to have seen him trying to avoid that a little bit. I mean, there's a couple things you don't do in life.

You don't tug on Superman's keep, you don't spit in the win, you don't fight in Eddie Bravo's half guard. You just don't do it. It's not a good idea. And he just allowed him to go right there, and I think maybe he wanted to beat him at his game, but why? I mean, clearly it did not work out, and especially if you're going to fight there, why allow him to get the lockdown, and why not know how to get out of it? He wasn't doing any of the right stuff. He allowed his knee to get really torqued out, and from there, Eddie Brabara,

was able to get underneath him. Like you said, he did the electric chair. I think he did it twice. Nearly put him in a weird neck cranking position by grabbing the forearm at one point. And all of the control was based off of that lockdown. And because Coiler, he wasn't, you know, typically you, to nerd out a little bit,

typically the lake that's caught in the lockdown, you want to bend it with your heel to your butt. You kind of want to turn away from them. And then bring it to your butt. and then you can turn back into them and extend the leg and you legwork around their legs. Or if that doesn't work, you can incorporate your free leg and use that and go kind of down, weave it in between their ankles, and you can straighten everything out and release the lockdown. He wasn't doing any of that, and it was very surprising.

And that allowed Eddie to get all of his sweeps and all of his setups for submissions. And then at the end, he got in this horrible calf-crusher position. if people aren't really familiar with that, it gets used very legitimately at a very high-level sport jiu-jitsu, especially Nogi, where, like, say, I think Vitor Olivares recently, who, if you don't know who he is, is a GFT fighter, one of the biggest jiu-jitsu camps,

and this guy's a beast. He's been tearing through the American circuit lately, even though he's a Brazilian guy. He went to the Nogi Worlds last year and submitted a black belt in tournament with that same submission. Or you're in that calf crusher, just pulled the leg down, and it's the only thing with the calf crusher is that some people just do not tap to it. Leg locks are a little bit tricky like that,

but when it's that, it's just put on that hard the way Eddie had it, and especially with Hoyler's knee being twisted to the side like that. It looked horrible. It looked horrible. Yeah, I mean, it was super deep. He must have rubber joints or something. Well, he said he heard the knee pop at least six times. And he kept twisting and he kept saying, you know, are you okay?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, but you heard what the man said. He goes, he's not going to tap. The only way to tap Hoyler is to choke him. The guy said that during the commentary. He probably wouldn't tap to that either, but at least he's out, right? I was really surprised because, I mean, even the way that he was fighting the electric chair sweep, when you do the sweep with that lockdown and you torque their knee to the outside,

I personally have torn someone's meniscus with that, because if they're stubborn and they try to fight back by straightening the knee and not trying to concede the sweep, it can go right on the knee. And I've torn someone's meniscus, and I've seen other people's meniscus is torn from the same exact position. So he wasn't fighting, you know, he wasn't fighting properly either. He was being stubborn with it. The knee was getting torquered really bad.

And he was in a horrible position for that calf crusher at the end, like I said. I was shocked to see him stand up at the end and seemingly walk around okay. Like I thought for sure that it had just blown everything out of that knee. But I don't know. I guess we'll have to hear reports from his camp afterwards. But, I mean, he seems. Okay. You know, it's funny.

I did the podcast, I ate last night. He goes to, you know, for sure, he's definitely got ice on it today, you know. But there's another school of thought to that. John Evan, you're a great jiu-jitsu guy. I mean, anybody I talk to at V-Mac, they all go, fuck, John Evan, you know, you're very technical and stuff. But John Evan, you've just been doing jih Tijuana for seven years. Can you imagine what you're going to be like at the 20-year mark? What also comes with that 20-year mark is flexibility.

You know, you could take your elbow to places I can't take mine and Lee can't take his You know, you've been doing the game for a long time You know your limitations You know, I mean, it's like the other than that I did something on stage, I had to stop to And when I got off both comics were like, bro, you heckled You handled that lady fucking perfectly

It wasn't because I'm better than you are It's because I've been doing it for fucking 20 years I'm not better than you I've just been doing it for 20 years that's how I looked at that that night that's just one of the things that it means to do Jiu-Jitsu if you watch one of the

countdowns to Meta-Morris is he stretches he's a big stretcher you know we all stretch our hamstrings and you know twist around but when do we really get deep into our ankle and switch it around and when do we really do those deep stretches which is what is needed for

Jiu-Tit-to if you really think about it you know sure no definitely and he said it he goes you know it's 2014. It's not just going to the jiu-jitsu thing anymore and doing hip escapes and rolling. There's so much more if you want to get that much better. So, you know, the conditioning is great for, you know, all that stuff. I mean, like I said, you could pop my fucking finger.

But I know there's jiu-jitsu guys that, you know, they fucking, they're greater. You can pull that finger back for hours and nothing happens. No, it's true. There's definitely a level of conditioning for, flexibility and joints and just Dean Lister who actually competed in this too also talks about it that you've got like a, it's nearly like a conditioning

for submissions. You start to build a tolerance after a while where, you know, not for chokes because for chokes, if you get choked unconscious more than, you know, a handful of times then it starts to, your body actually, just like in boxing, when boxer starts to get knocked out more than a couple of times, then they're, chin nose somehow that, oh, okay, well, I can stop all this trauma and by just putting this

person to sleep, then you do that. And then the guy starts passing out really easy. Same thing with chokes. You know, if you get choked out more than a handful of times, then you barely put pressure on the neck and the guy will pass out. But other than that, as far as like joints go, you can start to condition, especially for foot locks, for straight ankle locks. You'll see a lot of the top guys that have been put in a lot of horrible straight ankle locks that would separate the ankle from the leg, or, you know, just tear some of the ligaments down in the foot, and their feet are kind of like flopping all over the place, and there's no expression on their face. They're fine there, and the guy could be in a really terrible, deep belly down footlock,

and the guy's fine, because their legs have just been so battered over the years that the feet are, they're just loose, and they don't care. There's definitely a level of conditioning that comes with just training for a long, one time. It's a... I'm really happy. That may have played the factor, so... No, that definitely was. You know, John, I'm really happy for Eddie, and I could tell him the way that... By the way, you said that Eddie did great, you know, that you're happy in a way also, too.

I mean, we're both fans of J-Jit-too, but I'm really... Eddie's one of those guys that works hard. I mean, do not get me wrong. He's fucking crazy as cat shit. He's crazy as cat shit, you know, but that's what makes Eddie Eddie, and that's what makes his Jiu-Jitsu. I mean, who, what makes you wake up one morning and go, you know what? I think this is, I think I got a way to do this.

I think I got a better way than the Gracies. And he's not saying that. He's never said that. Eddie has never, ever said that. He's just said, I have maybe a different way to look at this. That's what I mean to say. I got a different way to look at this. And if you do this, you know, what he was saying was that, you know, if you're going to be

fighting in an MMA, there's no Ghee. So why train with the Ghee learn all these different things? And I'll tell you, I'm in the same position in my career. He's a come from behind type of guy. And he took a lot of chances, and he's got a lot of shit talked about him. I mean, people come up to me and say shit sometimes when I'm doing comedy. After a comedy show, people come home and go, how can you hang out? You know, let me tell you something, man.

That guy's done more for me as far as his values and his way of things. than a lot of other people have done, you know. And I was just very proud of that. When I watched it, the thing, the third time, his fight, I watched it three times. I watched at the comedy show, I watched it on the plane, and I watched it yesterday. The third time, I was overcome with tears because I know what it's like to have people say shit. And he's always been, you know, proven somebody wrong. And I give him props for that, man, that he just wanted to change.

He just had a belief. and I'm sure you have beliefs about you jit jujit juan Evan. You're very good at what you do, and I'm sure that you have you've even taught it. You've even said to me, listen, this is how they teach it in most schools.

This is how I teach it. You know, with the one leg, the takedowns you've been teaching that you review on Tuesdays. You know, if you look at the UFC and you look how they do takedowns, you're picking up your head, you're using your back,

you're doing a deadlift, and then you teach it this way that it's just push him this way and let his body do the work. You follow you? I mean, there's a million different ways to skin a cat and,

you know, like you said, motives too. Like, you know, Eddie might be crazy, you know, quote unquote.

But, I mean, honestly, though, like, who's to say Eddie's any crazier than Hoyler who lives, the eight,

slept and breathed jujitsu for every year of his life? You know, like, that's not a normal light either. So it's just, everyone's different. And Eddie, it was great to see him do really well. And I think a lot of people discounted him

because he has grown a ton of him and Hoyler last five. You know, like, I think people forget that he was, I think he was either a brown belt or a new black belt when they thought. He was a brown belt. And, yeah, and so much time's past, he's opened up. He got the whole Prince Planet thing going, and he's got multiple schools and trains with a bunch of top people, and his game's completely different.

I mean, even though he was using a lot of his half-guard stuff in this that he's known for, you know, he's progressed so much. And I think it was people that were a little bit, you know, I mean, on paper, Hoyler is the better athlete and the better competitor, because you've done more, you've named the best fighter of the 90s, et cetera. But, you know, people in the know, I think knew that it was a much bigger question mark

about this match because, you know, who's training more and who's grown more? And I think Eddie has definitely grown more because there was more to improve upon with Eddie's game from when they last fought. And, you know, just what kind of shape they're in and how they've updated the game. So I definitely was not expecting a blowout in this match at all.

And I think a lot of people that were higher-level grapplers or at least closer to the situation knew that it could be a much closer match than what people were giving any credit for. So it was great to see him come out and really do very well against such a top competitor. I was very happy. Hey, John, this is Lee. I have no jiu-jitsu background. and I knew the outcome of the fight before I watched it.

And I thought it was interesting, because Joey brought up, like, he could watch this every month. And I thought it was interesting that four out of the six fights ended in a draw. And in most American sports, there's a winner. So is there a way, like, how can you, how do you explain to someone who doesn't know Jiu-Jitsu that a draw isn't a bad thing? Because when I looked at it, I was like, wow, four out of the six fights ended with no one winning. But then when you see this fight, you're like, oh, okay, I see what happens. Like is there a way there could be like some sort of overtime where they do points or something like that?

But it was just, it was surprising to me that four out of the six fights in a big professional fight no one won. Yeah, that's actually a fantastic point that you bring up. And being someone that puts on their own tournaments myself, like it's a really, honestly is the biggest issue with sport jujitsu right now. what is the best tournament format? And I personally, there's pros and cons to the point system, and there's pros and cons to the submission-only system. I personally don't believe that the current point system that, say, the IBJF uses, especially with their rule set, is the best system.

I really like submission only, but then you run into that whole time limit issue. Metamores tried to change it up because this is now the third, metamorphous, I believe. The first metamorphous was submission only and then, I think, they did it just like this one, where it was a draw after a certain amount of time.

And then the second one, I don't believe it was no title of it yet, but the second one, what they did is they tried to do more like what you're saying so they can have less draws. And what that resulted in was

a lot more confusion and a lot worse matches. So even though there was four out of six matches went the distance, which is not ideal at all, these matches were much more exciting because in the second one, what they did was they said, okay, 20 minutes, submission only, and then at the end of that match, we'll have three judges that will just say who's a winner. And absolutely, with those four of six matches that were on this Metamor's card that did go the distance, there was pretty much a clear winner and loser in each one of them. But they can't, when they start to incorporate the judging system, then it becomes just the same as point-based. Because what happened was a lot

of the competitors were fighting and they knew, okay, well, we're 10 minutes in, this guy's too hard to submit and maybe I could make it work if I just won't balls out but I could also lose you know like maybe I'd give up a position or get too tired and then if he starts dominating then the judges will give the fight to him and there's money on the line of course too so people were just stalling more and trying to get a decision out of it even though there's no points so it made the fights really a lot less exciting and it was a shame but that's the way it works. If there's any kind of a point system, the fighters

will typically stall for those points, even if there's no points and there's just judging. So it was really hard for them to figure out a way to make less draws happen, but the only thing that they came up with was

20 minutes just for a spectator, just for the reason of the spectators being able to watch a predetermine. A pre-determine, and time limit match instead of having to schedule out your whole day for watching Metamores 3 because you don't know how long the matches are going to go and trying to make a decisive winner and make exciting fights. So even though there was the four fights that went to a draw,

they were much more exciting fights. Okay. And then I thought it was interesting. One of the fights that somebody won, somebody took the fight on 30 minutes notice. What is that like? like he was just there probably like maybe someone's part of a team or something and like somebody had a staff infection like how what is it like like I don't think you've ever seen the UFC fighter take a fight on 30 minutes notice no you

typically would not see that that's actually pretty crazy if you don't know who that was that was actually someone who did fight in the UFC was on the ultimate fighter it was Kevin Casey kind of famous Hickson Black Belt but he came in and stepped in for Benny Magal Hayes

who had a horrible staff infection they posted pictures on the internet and it looked pretty nasty so he had to step in on yeah like he said I think it was 30 minutes notice which is nuts the only thing that's good about Jiu-Jitsu

that's different from MMA is that if you mess up you're probably not going to get your face punched in you're not going to get me kind of you know you're not going to get a bad concussion or something like that Of course, you run the risk of being submitted, and it may be embarrassing or whatever, but if you tap early, you're probably not going to get hurt.

So that's one good thing about Jiu-Gitsu. You don't have to be – it's not going to endanger your career for taking a fight on such short notice like it would maybe an M.A. Okay. Yeah. It was a really weird situation, though. But, I mean, as long as you're training, even if you're maybe not in perfect tournament, shape if you're training real hard all the time in the gym and someone says hey do you want to

fight in this match maybe you're not mentally prepared but you know physically you're probably not too far off so okay yeah and then what are they don't necessarily peak like they do for m&A as much what are the weight classes because i noticed uh hoiler and daddy had like a 10 pound weight difference is that something they agree upon or or what is that because in in m m ms it's like to the to the ounce yeah in it's in an in m m m m ms yeah in it's really, well, I mean, if you want to look at a more established sport, look at boxing, where it's basically if you sneeze or blow your nose, then you're in a different weight class. So there's a lot of little weight classes because there's so many competitors.

And as MNA evolves, there will be more weight classes. And we've seen it with UFC already. There was never, I don't even think, I mean, in the beginning there was no weight classes. Then there was just maybe two, I think, like, maybe up to 190 or something like that, and then 190 and over, something like that. And then now there's a bunch. And they've started incorporating even the smaller weight classes, like they have 1.45, which is never one, 135. And I think they have 1 25 now, if I'm not mistaken. So as the sport grows, there will be more weight classes, and that changes all the time.

Same thing with sport jujitsu. There's a bunch of weight classes right now. There might be more later on. I know they just added one more to the female division for the IBJGF rules for this year. So that's always a good thing. But, yeah, the main thing you don't want is you don't want like a huge weight discrepancy. So this one was just, it's metamorphous. They don't have to follow any kind of athletic commission rules or anything, I don't think.

So they just agreed upon. certain catch weight or they could be different weights and it wasn't too bad. And part of it, one of the interesting things was some of the matches that they made were matches that you wouldn't usually see in a tournament setting. So like Clark Gracie versus Hapa Mendes, Clark Gracie is much bigger than Hafa. And Hafa is super dominant in his weight division. There's only one or two people that really give him issues in his weight class. and we've seen those fights over and over again

because they're always meeting in the finals for, say, the worlds in the IBJF. But Huffa, unless he fights the open class, would never fight Clark Gracie. So for them to make that match, it kind of makes more sense because, you know, you get to see maybe

Clark Gracie is probably like maybe a top five in his weight division. Hapa's maybe like a top two, top one or two. so he's right up there and getting to see them both fight each other when people say that maybe he's the best pound for pound you get to see that put to the test so i thought that was pretty interesting you wouldn't really get to see it elsewhere so but a big weight discrepancy there john ever let me ask you something where's your next backyard tournament um my next one man i wanted to have it maybe in the next week or so but the uh abdubhab pro is is coming up and

some of the fighters that I wanted to be in this one are going to be competing in Abu Dhabi Pro. I think that's like April 16th or something. So I will be staying up all night watching Abu Dhabi Pro because they live stream it, and they do they live stream it on their timetable, which is pretty much the opposite of ours here in America. I think the live stream starts at like 10 p.m. or something. So after that, though, that will be a busy weekend. Then maybe the weekend after that,

it'll be a good one. I think we're going to have a couple of bigger named grapplers, and they're going to fight for hopefully bigger prize money this time. So it should be a good one. You are now the official jiu-jitsu guy for the church of what's happening now. So you have the power to call in whenever you want and discuss whatever you want. We love you here.

That's John. As soon as I thought about you the whole weekend, I'm like, I can't wait to get them on Monday morning. So I'm happy to call. I'm sorry you had to get up earlier. I know you like to sleep until about 9-15, but maybe you'll catch the 9 o'clock of Cobranes today. There you go.

See how I'm inspiring. Yeah, I know. I might do it. I mean, you have to get in the car now and cut 1,000 motherfuckers off on the 101. It's deep on a fucking Monday going into Hollywood. But I love when you call in, John. You know, I'm a fan of yours.

How can they find your breakdowns and everything you're involved with with Jitsu? Yeah, so you can go to my YouTube channel. That's where I do all my main video updates. That's just YouTube.com slash BJJ Breakdown. Or you can go to my Facebook page, which is Facebook.com slash BJJ breakdown as well. I also have BJJ Breakdown.com, but I'm redoing the site right now. So it's maybe not quite up-the-date yet.

When are you going to start your podcast, John, Evan? You need to get out there. I need to hear you more. You know, maybe if Jiu-Jitsu gets more popular, especially with events like this that are great and more accessible to the average person, man, I'd love to start one as long as there's a listener base out there that'd like to listen. I'm telling you, you're knowledgeable, so if you build it, they'll come. Trust me, my brother. That's the goal. Hopefully, with all these tournaments and everything, people get more into it.

Some of the most talented athletes out there are in Jiu-Jitsu, and it's a really hard sport, and it's a little bit discouraging to see some of the most amazing technicians you've seen out there that can barely scrape together to make ends meet. So hopefully get some more money into the sport and help these guys a little bit. That's what I'm trying to do, brother. Thank you very much for calling. I'll call you later on.

Oh, definitely. Thank you guys so much. Thank you, John Evan. It's always a pleasure for you to call, man. Like I said, you're the new correspondent for the Churchill what's happening now, the Jiu-Jitsu Division. So all you got to do is text me and say, Joey, I want to call up today.

I want to talk about something of your family. You're good. All right, brother? Awesome, man. Thank you. Thank you, John. Evan. Have a great day. That was great. You know, hey, listen, man, kind of soul. You know, Eddie gets tortured.

Eddie gets a lot of shit from people and a lot of people would quit. Don't ever fucking quit, man. Like I said, it only hurts for as long as you let it. You're fucking move. on and that's your gasoline that's it I want to give some shoutouts to some bad motherfuckers today my main man Don Sal Zarulow Sergio Andahar talking lair Ernesto Salazar John Rallo the Teflon Jew Samuels my man Neelyas Samuels my man

water boxer anybody who came to the Fort Lauddale Improv this weekend my man Oscar Nunei and Oscar Hernandez I love you motherfuckers my man Brock a lot of people came out I met a lot of cool people I met this black Lee Syatt fan with a gold tooth who caught me outside it was like I wish I had been there you but my main nigger is Lee the fucking flying Jew where's the flying Jew at that's my nigger he must have told me that 15 fucking times man I'm happy you're here but man I see that motherfucker grow and shit I see them grow I wish I would have got his name I would have fucking had him calling he was a

Aliris. Cold Tooth, the chick that wouldn't say nothing. She was like kind of scared that he might beat her and shit. Right there in public. Well, if you're listening, email me at Flying G Radio or Gmail.

I don't know what his name is. I want you to talk to him. I want to give a shout out to my fucking sponsors. Hulu Plus, as usual. Fucking making it happen. $7.99 a month. Watch all shows whenever the fuck you want.

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party started, bitches. That's how we roll. Hon.com, I can't thank you enough. I can't thank you for what you've done

for me. Your products, whenever I contacted you, you send me my alpha brain. I just finished the one alpha brain cycle. I'm going to start

another one about three weeks. The Shroom Tech, I'll be taking it tonight for Jiu-Jitsu. I mean, I believe in this shit, folks. And it's helped me, the Shroom Tech sport

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Also, to my fucking great friends at Dollar motherfucking shave club making it happen again. I got home today, there was a thing of fucking razors right there. It's not even the fucking first. They're better than welfare. You understand? Better than fucking welfare. It gets to your house. Audit also has the program. You can stay on it.

You get 20% off their mail everything to your house the first of the month. Dollar Shave Club does that a nice razor. Some fucking four blades. Let's say you want to wipe your asshole. The one wipe Charlie's. You have the Cocoa Butter Shave. Dollar Shave Club, don't fuck around.

Go to Dollar Shave Box and Press. Church. Church. When you go to joeydeers.net. Also, my brothers are escapod.com. Tank. I love Jeremy. Escape pod tank. Escape pod tank. What I say? Escapepodtank.com. Yeah, you added a dot.

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Not only that, I'm going to save you two grand on a fucking tank. There you have it. Plus the $250 and buy a T-shirt. That's what you need to fucking do. And that's it. We got a beautiful fucking day to be a line. It's going to be 60 degrees. I'm tired today. Oh, yeah.

I think I'm going to go to kettlebell class tonight or just go to Jitutu tonight because it's Marcel. I'm V-MAC tonight for the first half hour he makes you do jumping jacks and fucking burpees and fucking push-ups.

I can't do burpees I can't do the hill climbers I try them, you know, but I'm working every day man. I'm trying to fucking do this every day. This weekend I ran two days. I rode the bike. Inside or outside? Because outside was a bit. Inside, inside. No, it wasn't that bad. It wasn't that human. It was

cloudy. It wasn't sunny at all. I got... Oh, wow. It was cloudy all fucking three days. I rode the bike for the first time because my knee was bothering me. Oh, fuck. So I wanted to really give it some mobility. So I rode the bike both days for 20 minutes. Then I got on the treadmill and did the Dolce died for 40 minutes. So it's a 60 minute of cardio.

You know, I burned some calories. My shirts were fucking sweaty as fuck. They smelt. But, you know, you run, what the Dolce thing is, you walk the first five minutes on, like 3.5. And then after that, every two minutes, you jog or you sprint for 30 seconds. And then you walk two minutes. So it's not bad. You recover, you put a good, you put an album on on your iPod.

Just put the album on, because it's going to take you 30 minutes. And you just put the, you walk for the first five, then you fuck around with it. Sometimes I put it all the way up to like 6.5, and I only sprint for 15 seconds. But then I'll rest for a minute and 45 seconds. So you can play around with it. You know, I do it for like Jiu-Jitsu to get out of a, you know, you're on the bottom and you want a fucking hip escape and then put them back in your guard. So that's all I'm doing with that little running thing.

But it was Mike Dolce who invented it. I didn't invent it. I just modified it a little bit like Eddie Bravo, modified Jiu-Jitsu. So I did that. So today, I was telling you take Sunday

and go back at it today, but I'm just physically tired today. I think I'm going to go back and have breakfast with the family and maybe do that and maybe just fuck around and write and do all that stuff. What do you got playing that?

You got a podcast? Got a podcast. Got the Red Sox coming. What time did the Red Sox? Opening days at noon. Oh shit. I was going to go down to the Boston Barzs Center. Let's eat the fucking Goomby Bed.

Okay. Let's eat the fucking goo me bed. I was going to go to the Boston brought in Santa Monica but yeah check it out we got a fucking green hornet Lee's gonna Monday the March 30 that's how we're starting this motherfucker

line up bush the sound the winter Eddie played it last night now it's been on my mind all fucking morning it's gonna be interesting flying your radio on a podcast on an edible delicious today they do a good job with these fucking green horns I'll tell you that much

only that they fuck you up too Um, yeah. Mm-mm-mm. Just like mommy used to be in here. I don't know how you... I like that so much more than anything chocolate-based. I can't do that. But that's, that's yummy.

You don't like the chocolate on base for the second. This week we're doing a special podcast Wednesday at 1 o'clock. I got a special guest for you motherfuckers. I just need them to confirm. And that's it. We got a great week coming. Next week, I'm at the disc Thursday. I'm at the Tempe Improv.

But next week, I'm in Grand Motherfucking. Rapids, Michigan, bitches. Break out the dirty white women with dirty feet. I love it. I love Michigan. I love Tempe. I can't wait to see you motherfuckers this weekend. Beside that, that's it.

Yeah. If you have a second, go to leeside.com. Everything I do is there. I appreciate it. Okay. No, and also, for you motherfuckers asking, you ready? The coffee cups are in. The t-shirts are in.

All I'm waiting on is the ghee patches. And after that, the store will be open. My wife is going to open the store this week. for pre-order, like Lee did with his t-shirts. We'll be sending them out next week. We got short-sleeve, Churchill's What's Happened now, T-shirts, and long-sleevee, Church of What's Happened Now, T-shirts that have been selling

on the road when the sleeve says the flying Jew. You know what I'm saying? You got a pussy, a cock with balls and a crucifix on your fucking shirt. What else do you need? If that don't get you started, nothing's going to get you started. I love you, motherfucker. I love you, Motherfuckus. From the church of what's happening now. Have a great day. I want to thank all my sponsors.

Again, Huluplus.com. EscapeBodtank.com and Dollar Shave Club. I love you guys. Have a great fucking day. Have a great Monday. Remember, fuck them all up the ass.

Don't give a fuck what they got to say. You're the Captain Kirkland Enterprise. You're the motherfucker that goes to shop ride or panty pride or fucking Albertsons and pays for your own groceries. And if we got something to say to him to suck your dick and call you shorthy, you were born in 1940.

You ain't taken nut from nobody today. You're going to be the best motherfucker you could be. Fuck the National Anthem. today. This is your own personal anthem. There's the personal anthem you're playing your fucking head every morning when you wake up. Today they're going to suck my, all these people with their positive reaffirming's. I am who I am. You know, I'm confident.

Go fuck yourself. You're a bad motherfucker. You got to say that to yourself in the morning with one eye shut to your fucking brain like Popeye with one fucking eye. Look at yourself and go, I'm a bad motherfucker. Nobody's going to fuck with me today. Somebody's going to suck my dick today. Somebody's going to fucking pay me today.

And today I'm going to be a lot better than I was fucking. Yesterday. The church of what's happening now. I love you motherfuckers. Stay black. Go out there. Mug somebody. Hit it, Lee, you bad motherfucker. Now that the show's over, don't forget to sign up for your free trial of Hulu Plus. Stop on this.

Fucking Jeff, fucking pussy motherfucker. Let's you bend to thousands of hit shows anytime, anywhere. On your TV, PC, smartphone, or talent. Support this podcast and get an extended free trial of Hulu Plus. When you go to Huluplus.com slash Joey, or go to Joey Diaz.net and click on the Hulu Plus Bainer. And don't forget to sign up for

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deprivation tank.