The Church of What's Happening Now: The New Testament - #176 - Joey Diaz, Danny B. and Lee Syatt

Episode Date: May 12, 2014

Joey Diaz and Lee Syatt are joined again by Danny B. This podcast is brought to you by: Onnit.com. Use Promo code CHURCH for a discount at checkout. Hulu Plus. Visit Huluplus.com/joey for an extended free trial. Dollar Shave Club. Use promo code CHURCH and get high quality razors sent to your door. Escapepodtank.com Mention Joey or the Church and get $250 off. Recorded on 05/12/2014.

This show is sponsored by Hulu Plus. Hulu Plus lets you binge on thousands of hit shows anytime anywhere on your TV, PC, smartphone, or tablet. Support this podcast and get an extended free trial of Hulu Plus when you go to Huluplus.com slash Joey. That's Huluplus.com slash Joey. And by Dollar ShaveClub.com. Get high-quality razor sent to your door every month for a fraction of what you pay at retail. Now, go to Dollar Shaveclub.com slash church. That's dollarshaveclub.com slash church.

Or just go to Joey D.S. dot net and click on the dollar shape club banner and go to escape podtank.com for all of your sensory deprivation tank needs they're already going to save you thousands but if you mentioned joey dyes or the church of what's happening now they're going to save you an additional $250 off ain't nothing but against the party oh shit is right motherfuckers the new office is in full effect charles bronson clemesewood oh shit Monday, May 12th, the day the devil got fucked in the ass, lit on fire, then buried at sea with Donald Sterling.

What? Ugh. Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit. We need some black girls with afros in the batch's dance. I'm gonna put an Afro all you, Cocks suck and make you wigger with a bikini on. What?

What? Grab your nuts, motherfuckers. It's Monday. It ain't fucking around. Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit. Vapers.

e-cigarettes, alpha brain, protein shakes, and my dick is hard, ready for somebody to suck it. Let's do this motherfucker. What? We're seeing Aubrey in Austin, right?

Who? Aubrey? I'm seeing everybody. Because we need to get him to make one of those weed things, but just do alpha brain, Shumtech sport, immune,

strong bone, all in one thing. All in one fucking vaping. Boom, your head blows up, and next thing you're doing jumping jacks and your knees don't hurt no more. It's a beautiful fucking day to be alive.

We're here at the new offices, the new church facilities. We're unveil it to you by Wednesday once we hang the American flag up. The microphones coming in. We're going back to fucking basics. You understand me? We're going back to the fucking, what do you call it, a little hole? When the bomb fucking comes and where people hide? We're going to the bomb shelter?

We're going to the bomb shelter. You understand me? Back. Because that's what we're going to go. And just hang and sit and fucking smoke. What's what the question is? I've never heard of anyone say. Let's go to the bomb shelter.

Let's go to the fucking. That's what this is. is. The last place was a bomb shelter. The last place was a fucking bomb shelter. It's air conditioning, windows, humanity. We got our own door. We got our own door. We got Russians. We got Russians guarding the fucking thing. You know what I'm saying? I don't mind

black people. That lady was just confused black person. That's it. She was trying to be somebody who's not, which is fucking 62% of this fucking L.A. scene and 40% everywhere else. She's a fucking black woman trying to be a Notre Republic. I can't say she can't be a Notre Republic. But she was sitting in this

fucking cubicle. all day doing dick. It was one of those places where she went just to hang out to tell somebody that she had a fucking office. That's no office. You don't invite nobody there. Yeah. But what are you going to do?

We got a better place. Fuck it. We got a better place where they'll appear. We're crossing the fucking car lot. We got an in and out burger down the corner. Oh, that could be bad. We got a Chinese joint down the corner. We got a CVS joint down the corner.

Before I started going to China deli, I used to go to that joint up the corner. Oh, shit. Got a nice lunch special. It's not too fucking bad. What made you leave? I found the better joint, but then they all suck. dick now. So I don't eat Chinese food at all. You call your mother for Mother's Day?

Oh, yeah. Very important. We only have one fucking mother. When she's gone, you can't get nothing back. Oh, my God. I'm sure everyone, not everyone saw it, but SportsCenter. Like, they'll usually do one story that will make you cry. They had like a 10-minute segment of like five or six stories of these moms that were in the Army or the Navy and coming back to surprise their kids.

It's fucking tough. It's very tough. I can't, my cousin is in the Air Force and she just went to, she's in Afghanistan. stands for six months and she has like a two-year-old kid but luckily she went to the to live with the dad for the six months but it's just it's crazy it's very crazy to uh give up your children and go but that's a commitment you make you know and it makes you stronger it makes you tougher in a way i just want to give a shout out to the mothers that listen to the show uh without you we got fucking nothing it all starts with that fucking monkey that's the bottom line it all

starts there and uh so i hope all the guys and girls that listened to the church gave you love because at the end you got nothing I don't have a mom to send a fucking car to I don't have somebody to send flowers to or call and tell a thank you for fucking giving me a chance but in my heart I do I have a lot of moms so I called them all yesterday and I had a nice time with my wife you know we were gonna go I fucking the night before first off Santa Fe was tremendous awesome Santa Fe is a great little city New Mexico is one of the uncharted fucking you know nobody thinks of New Mexico nobody I was introduced to New Mexico

maybe 15 years ago when I was in college and I was getting ready to go to prison I worked for the Hertz Corporation that was part of the management training program I would have to drive cars on the weekends that was my job

back to the original destinations so they offered it to me some kid could do it for eight bucks an hour I could do it for like 15 in a hotel and fucking and I didn't do comedy then it just used to get me out of town to breathe even think about my life and where I was going to go.

I take a couple J's and no coke on those trips, and I just spend the weekend, and I got to eat the green chilies, and I got to learn about their culture, and it's really a neat fucking place. It's fucking beautiful. New Mexico as a whole is beautiful. That's a Greg Jackson's camping,

and I wish they could have came to the show, but they had their own fights in Albuquerque. We shot the longest yard in Santa Fe. And that was the first time I was back in Santa Fe, since the longest yard. So the first day we got there, we went outside, Ari and I are going to get high. I got one more week before I could get high until Saturday.

I'm smoking reframing. How old would it have been? 90 days on Saturday. Wow. We'll talk about that later. It's so funny, I sat outside, and this vet came up to us, this great kid from West Cruz, as Anthony and his girlfriend, and they asked if we want to get high. And it was just four people, just talking, you know.

Something that, you know, there was no Hollywood, no nothing. They pulled up because Joey, will these things? in a dump like this for. And I knew as soon as he got out of the car, he was a member of the church. And he came over and we sat and we spoke. And he was a vet. And he really inspired me, you know, as a 25-year-old kid to come back. And he was already in a war, you know.

And what a fucker have I done at 25? But I admire that and inspired me. He was with his girlfriend. He's going back to school, you know. It really fucking inspired this shit out of me, how some people come back and cry, you know. and this is this is this they don't accept me. Some people come back and just pick their fucking pants on. You know, I never went to the service,

but I always have a soft spot for that because it's something I wanted to do. Again, another one of my regrets. I would have loved to be able to say that I serve my country. I serve my country a different way in prison like a fucking jerk off. But it's a great experience for Pete. I see what it does for them. For some people, you know, some people don't take anything from experiences. But if I was in a hole and I was 18, I had no fucking future.

And I didn't. I just was a hustler and a survivor, and I knew how to put pieces together. You know, I didn't show up for my physical because I didn't want to get a blood test. I had no problem shooting people and cursing motherfuckers out. But God forbid I gave a blood. I was so shallow at that age that I overlooked such a life over a blood test, something that takes 60 seconds, you know? That was really the only reason you didn't go?

That's the real reason. I had nothing going on. And I knew that if I would have gone, I would have been the push I needed. I was pushing myself at that age. So it wasn't like I was just sitting there watching MTV all fucking day watching videos. I was still out there doing my thing. But it's always been one of my... Listen, man, if you're 18 and you join the service, you fucking retire by the time you're 38.

Do you know what that's like? To be walking around with 38 and getting checks in the mail, you'd go back to college. You could do a thousand fucking things, you know? And I know that you put up in a lot of shit. You put up a lot of shit. shit in life. If you're 18 and you go work on a fucking warehouse, how much shit do you put up with? They give you $7.50 an hour.

You've got to be there on time. Maybe your boss is angry, fucking passive. He wants to be a ballet star, but he ended up in a fucking warehouse. So now he takes that on you every fucking day. What's a difference? What's the fucking difference? When you see people that uptight in their jobs, that they're bosses and they push you,

that's because that's not what they really want to fuck. I hate that shit. When I used to work, when I used to be a fucking civilian and people come in a Tony's here. You know, Make believe you're working. Fuck, you know. I fucking hate that shit. And I understand what people go through on a daily basis when they work, you know.

And it's so weird, like you could tell when somebody's kind of stuck. Those days when I was young, I would see those people. We talked about this last week when you work and you see people that are older than you, and you're like, that's what I have to look forward to being that. That's what I have to, even if I stick this out and learn this career. I look forward to being that guy. That's all, you know, he wants to yell at me or fucking tell me that I, didn't do the fucking boxes right or the orders.

I mean, they just come in to fucking bring the energy level down, some bosses, you know, and then they leave. They just come in and spread to like a fucking, well of those Chinese people, the Mongolians that killed everybody. Yeah. They just come in, slice your head off and leave, you know. So. I think what it is is when you're 18 and making that decision, someone telling me that I'm going to be 38 and retired, I can't even imagine. You can't imagine. You can't imagine.

You know, I talk this shit here to you guys. and I'm wrong for talking it because give me fucking 10, 18-year-olds, and I'll show you one of those 10 that thinks about the future, like really the future. I really even look past 30. Because when you're 18, 25 seems like a fucking...

Oh, yeah. It seems like going to turn it away. And it's not. And it's really not. It goes by fucking fast, you know? Because you graduate what? When you... How old are you when you graduate college?

22 or 21? Yeah, because you go in when you're 18, 18. 18 years. 22, 23. Yeah. And for the last three years before I met you, what were you doing? Well, I met you at 23, basically. Yeah, and basically met me six months a year after I got out of college.

So, I mean, it's just, it's a... And I don't think that people who go into the Army are going in thinking, ooh, I get to retire in 20 years. It's just what they want to do. What they want to do at that time, you're right. But, like, my cousin, my cousins, I have both of them are in there, and they grew up, like, so poor. Like, it was just, like, their mom was working at me.

McDonald's. And it's just, it's just, uh, it was terrible. But they both went in. One of them is one of the guys that, uh, refueles planes in midair. And that's fucking cool. He goes, he just wants to Japan and Hawaii. Like he, and, but then the other one who has the kid spent time in Okinawa and London. And now that she has the kid, they're paying her more. And then now she's based in like North Carolina for most of the year. But every couple of years she has to go to Afghanistan for a few months and but she's Air Force so she's not doing anything dangerous. Oh you're always doing something dangerous because if there's a war you get I don't know what the word is activated or I don't want to sound like a fucking mom I am a fucking mom but it's

it's just amazing the people that the people that inspire me sometimes like I don't get inspired by fucking movie stars and all this shit I get inspired by little people because it takes me back it takes me back it reminds me I love being reminded I love being reminded every fucking day of what life could be or what life used to be like so it makes me work harder. People that push their pass back and go on my I dip into that once a

day whenever I'm feeling down. You know, if I'm feeling down about something, I go, you know what? I'll tell you how bad it could be. I could be waking up with a piece of shit next to my face with no blanket, no pillow. I think most people learn from that. No, it keeps me fucking honest, man. Because it keeps me knowing

what could happen at any minute. This is just a fucking, you know, I think if you're real and you're nice and you genuinely love people for what they are, I think that even in bad times, you survive. Have you always been like that? Because, I mean, just speaking for me personally, this is the happiest I've ever been. So I try not. Like, it's not an active I try not to, but I don't find myself thinking about a couple of years ago.

Like, who thank God? Well, you can't fake happiness. Right. You can laugh and giggling them and you go home, you're in your four walls and you're crying. You know, you can't fake happiness. That's the worst. And I did plenty of that growing up I did plenty of that when I was

Trying to become a comedian From the frustration You know when you want something so bad And you can't get help, you know And you can't and you figure it out You go you know what I don't need no fucking help I'm gonna figure it out And you diagram your own fucking directions

You know and that's why I always say the power of the pen Diagram your own fucking direction Diagram your own fucking map This is your map You know when you get in your call You go I'm gonna go to fucking You know whatever and you press the address and it navigates you, it tells you.

I wish life was like that. And nothing really happens to you make your fucking plan, where you make your map, that this is what I'm doing, and nothing's going to deter me from this. You know, I'm boring, man. I'm a boring individual one at the end that comes to it because I do what works for me, and I do it exactly the same way every day.

Because it works for me. When I deviate from what works for me, that's when my day goes kaput. I know what's going to work for me. And it's funny, I'm taking a voiceover class. That's awesome. Right, I take a, this is the second week out of three. You know, I signed with a voiceover agent, and I didn't do too well.

And I'm the type of guy that, if I don't do too well, either I figure it out, which I went online and tried to read, or I know that if I mimic somebody or I go see somebody do it, I'll get better at that job. So what, and I don't know, maybe you don't know yet, maybe that's why I had the in class. but like you're you acted in the longest yard and then they want you to do the longest yard cartoon how is that different it seems like it'd be similar well

when you do a voice your emotion has to come through your voice I don't have my hands okay I don't have my eyes I don't have my mouth I don't have my mannerisms so maybe the cartoonist or the whatever you call them yeah that's a word for them animator animator could do all that with me but my voice is what gives that character emotion

with cartoons okay and it's so weird this is all falling in because now I watch cartoons again. Oh, yeah. I've been watching Pepper Pig. Pepper Pig, by the way, is fucking hysterical. I don't even know that one.

Pepper Pig is this cartoon that replaced a bunch of shit on Nick at Night. It's this fucking pig with an English accent. And it fucking pissed Mercy off for about a month. Oh, she didn't like it?

No, because she already knew what time these things come on. It was Team Umi Zumi comes on. But now they've replaced the whole Nick at Night Network with fucking Pepper Pig, and she snaps. So every morning,

take mercy and I sit around my lap and we watch I go to ABC TV and I watch the ABCs I watch ABC phonics I do the numbers with her and then to break up the monotony I do the alphabet by pepper pig all the other kids videos Beaver whatever and ABC.com they all give you you know A is for apple a apple B is for ball ball ball ball C is for cat cat D is for They give you all these fucking words. Pepper Pigs, Dino... Pepper Pigs ABC just breaks it the fuck open. She's talking about dinosaurs and fucking cat food.

Like her words are funny. And the pigs, the daddy pig, the mommy pig. I fucking giggle every time I watch the alphabet by Pella Puck. That's just me. But it's amazing how you... I just want to be good at it. You know, I know that our lives go in evolution. I don't like to be bored.

I don't like being bored. You know, we had a great time last week. do two podcasts outside. We could have done them in the office. We went against our fucking green. We didn't play no music, no video. We just went out there and had to talk. We got forced to do a podcast again.

And it was fucking fantastic. It taught me a lot again. I like switching shit up. People come to me on the time, hey, when are you going to do joy karate videos? I'm not doing them no more. I might start doing Joey jujitsu videos pretty fucking soon. If I lose some weight, you know, get on the mat

and do some hipascape, some motherfuckers and some fucking judo rolls by myself. Something just to show people I'm fucking up to. But I still go every day. I'm going today. the fucking jih T-30. I'm going at 10.30 because I thought I had a 1. So I'm going up to 10th planet. I had a great week last week, Jiu-Jitsu-wise, because I went to class three times.

Oh, wow. That's great. And my breathing, I mean, it's going to be so hard to smoke refra again in the mornings. Because my breathing has improved. When you said it, I was like, are you sure you're definitely going to go bad to it? Because you seem so happy with it. I might take a few hits at night just to help the fucking cause, you know? But I'm having fun with the vapor. you know, the vapor doesn't get me high after lunchtime.

After this morning rush, I don't get high. Oh, Jesus. That's why. Are you high right now? Yeah. Don't make me give you another one, cock sucker. You could use another vapor. It's that time anyway.

It's one day, May 12th. You know what I'm saying? Why are you looking at me at that look? Because I'm high. So you get high. You're not even edible. You know what I'm saying? So what?

That's what they're there for. But if I brought an edible, you'd be fucking crying too. I don't want the waistline. I didn't cry at all. It is kind of crazy because, like, for me, there were a bunch of editors who, like, had been there for 20 years and they don't, okay. Oh, shit. And they didn't, they never learn new equipment or something, or they, they learn the bare minimum. So then they have a guy like me coming and basically show them how to turn it on.

So it is kind of cool that you have to always evolve and always learn. You have to, you have to. Listen, for 20 years, people are, oh, your voice is great. You've got a voiceovers. Nobody ever signed me for a voice over. What did I do? I did trip tank. Is it on?

Yeah, it's on. There's the light on? Let me see. Cox sucker that you're fucking up. Once I did trip tank, yeah, it's on. Just press it. I'm supposed to listen to a burn. Let me see if I can get it.

Don't listen to nothing. Just press it and smoke. Don't listen to the burn. You want to hear it burn? Listen to my asshole as I fucking pop a fart. Cox sucker. Press it. You press it?

Press it. Keep press it. and now I hit it again. You didn't get nothing. Let your finger off it for a minute. Let it refuel. Press it again. Two seconds.

Hit it. Slow. Slow. Not like a fucking black cock. Slow, cock sucker. Slow, get the fumes in your lung. That's a boy. I let it sit in your throat.

Bust that fucking vapor out. There you go. You see what I'm saying? Who takes care of you? Like your Uncle Joey cock sucker? Nobody. No. I had to go to this.

I did the trip tank. And I wanted to do more voiceover. and I talked to a friend of mine who that's what he does, and I took him out to breakfast, and they asked him, he goes, I'll give you a shot. And right away, he got the ball going. He threw me right to the fucking wolves. This guy was my commercial agent, 1997 also.

He was my first commercial agent. Oh, cool. So I signed with him across the board. I went to a couple auditions. I didn't do good. And you know me, bro, I don't like doing good, especially when somebody works hard for me. I can't let them down, you know, especially those agents.

So I checked around, and I signed up, this class, you know, and it's with three different directors, casting directors, from Disney, shit like that. Oh, that's so cool. If I get a little bit out of it, if I learn one fucking thing, it would work the fucking 80 bucks or whatever, you know? It's Monday, seven to ten, and hopefully

I'll get better at it, you know, and this is why you do these little workshops and shit, you know? I don't, I don't do a workshop for life for somebody to hold my hand. I go, I get their interpretation of it, and then I do what I do. Right. And we put it all together, you know? But that's funny that you think, just because I did a

fucking, I do it all. I don't give a fuck. I'm trying to learn everything. The book will be out by December. We hooked up with that girl. She's so nice. She's great. I'm going to do this book. I'm going to put another CD out. This is what's in the works right now. I'm starting

to do all this. The book is probably a quarter gone, man. I've really been putting some time into it. I think I'm going to only do a couple fucking different weeks this summer. I'm going to San Jose. I'm going to Vegas. But I'm going to focus on that book so it's done by the end of August.

Nice. So by September and October, Shika, and it's been a fucking, listen, I didn't know how to write, Lee. Right. Six years ago, I sat behind a computer in Hollywood when I stopped doing Blow, and I started putting a blog up every Monday. And if you look at those blogs today, like, Joey, you're a dummy. I didn't even know how to write. I had no ideas.

I had forgotten grammar. I'd forgotten spelling. I'd forgotten everything. I'd been that long. I made the mistake to a lot of young people doing Hollywood. I was in Young. They come to town, they buy writing book, and they think the writing books are going to do the writing for them.

You can read all the books you want on writing. Unless you fucking write, nothing's going to happen. You got to write. It's like everything else. You can stay at home and watch jiu-jitsu videos. Unless I go there and get beat up for a year, you're never going to get nothing. You only get better at something and you get beat up at something. But the main thing is you got to do it.

If you don't do it, then you're fucking dead. And that's why I do all these little fucking things I do to keep me sharp. I'm 51. Lee, I'm supposed to be losing my memory. I'm supposed to be losing all these fucking things. fucking things and I accept them, but I got to keep the areas that are sharp, fucking sharp. You know, when you cover Michael, when you played the fucking whatever, the bulls in the 80s, the 90s, you didn't cover Michael Jordan to say you're going to shut them down.

That's not going to happen. What you do is cover the other guys four tightly and let Michael Jordan run his game. Do you follow the backing behind it, the mindset, and that's just what I'm doing. I'm playing a fucking box four on me. So whatever I'm strong at, I go at. I'm weak at, I'm just going to get rid of now because I'm fucking 51, but you don't want to no weaknesses. You want to keep writing and keep fucking, you know, you just want to keep doing it, brother. That's great.

No, it's not that I didn't think you could do it, but it's just, it's, I know a lot of people who, when they get to your age, if someone to take a voiceover class, they might say, oh, those stupid casting directors don't know what they're doing, I'm just going to keep to this, or I'll eventually get it. So maybe they don't know what they're doing, but neither do I. But if I could take one quality from them. Oh, no, you're doing the right thing. I'm just saying what they would have said. If I could take one line from them that I learned something, then I'll be fucking ready to rock, you know?

Yeah. If I could take one thing from them and learn, that's all that fucking matters, man. That's what evolving is. That's what you keep moving. You know, for the last three weeks, I took the kettlebells out three days a week out of my thing. because I was just eating too much. So now I go to the Y, and I do the epileptical,

and I do the bag, and I do the bicycle once a week to loosen up my knee. I try to keep it, you know, I try to go to one drill class with John Evan, but then I also go to one fucking fighting class with salami so you can beat the fuck out of me up at 10th planet. And I keep it all going because it keeps my mind fresh. Yeah. You know, I can't do the same fucking shit every week, you know? So if you're bored with what you're doing, just switch up a little bit once.

in a while for a few weeks just to throw some whatever in there. You know, this morning I didn't have a protein shake this morning, to be honest with you. I had a fucking egg and I had a piece of fucking, whatever how you call it. A piece of fish I had left over. Yeah, with no toast. Oh, shit. Yeah, just something

different. I'll have a protein shake when I go home now. Okay. You know, because I had two protein shakes the other night, back to back, the fucking farts that I had been blasting on the way down the sand, whatever, or the worst ever. When you have two protein, when you have a protein shake, At the end of your night to help you whatever after you work out,

because I had a late workout Thursday night or Friday night. I went to Jiu-Jitsu. Begin of Jiu-Jitsu late, and I went home, instead of eating, I had a protein shake. Then I woke up the next morning. My flight was early, so I had a protein shake. All that way and whatever the fuck, the chemicals they put in there. When you eat healthy, what comes out of your ass is horrible.

You can eat 10 white castles and fart, and it's okay. I can't imagine a one egg and a fish fart, it smells good, though. No, I had a fried egg. I ate the yolk. And then I fucking had a piece of salmon that was left over. That fart's going to kill somebody. So what? But it's protein enriched.

I love it. I love it when people weren't right when I have bad fart sticks to somebody. Oh, I love it. I was blasted them yesterday. And yesterday it was coming out of my asses. The pre-farts, right in the plane. The pre-shit fart, the last one before. That's terrible.

That's a... Why are you talking about shit? It's Monday, May 12th. A little something for my mother on fucking post-mother's day. I played this yesterday from my mom. Really? A candle. I couldn't get flowers because the cats eat them

Oh really? My buddy Frankie Balzano always calls me and calls me Tell me with your mother's funeral signs so I could drop flowers for it's not the same You know Well Tony Bennett We've been gone for two fucking long people

The live podcast, two music ones We're back! It's Monday to 12. Get your shit together Because I'm a somebody who will swear to be true as you used to do with me. What the fuck, we? Nothing. I've decided that I'm going to, I have to learn Spanish for Paula's mom. Okay.

And I'm the fucking worst at languages. What you're doing for mercy is so cool because, like, I just, I can memorize, like, microphone, it's microwner. Are the words, but the fucking grammar and the conjugating words, it fucking... Listen, don't worry about all that shit. What you need to do is, I got the pleasure for you.

Got. One day, every day, for one hour, you're going to go and put on the Alamundo. That's it? That's it. For now, this goes in different. I want you to listen. Okay.

I want you to listen. I do notice that I... Take a notebook. Okay. Open it from scratch. You just write little words down. Because a lot of English words sound similar in Spanish.

They just change the... a little bit so you got that so as long as you understand one word from each sentence we're halfway there then we're gonna pick up two words okay I'm gonna pick up three words but I want you to listen something we don't do anymore we don't listen God gave you fucking ears to listen that's why I love podcasting I like the Ustream I like podcasting because it forces you to listen when I was growing up it was albums Richard Price so you had to listen you know now it's a you get more video and all that shit I like when people have to listen you

If you listen to people talk Spanish, one hour a day, that's seven hours a week, in the morning, 8 to 9, even if you put on the news. Put the news on. Because when they talk about debautees, that's sports, now you've got a beat. Okay. That's the, because now you got an interest. Oh, Jose Smith, met him a trejoon-on-on-a-on-thor-so. Got out of five-zero. Now you start figuring out, Cinco or zero, zero is zero.

Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Because it's an interest of yours. Yeah. Now we've got to find some fucking Mexican Jews. That's what we need to fucking find. I'm sure they have them. No, they got them.

One of the guys that went to war with some Mexican Jew. But that's your first thing is listening. It's listening. Because before you could speak it, you have to listen. You know, it's funny how much of our learning process is from seeing other people. Oh, yeah. And we're not imitating. We're just learning and putting what he's doing to the next level.

You know, I love spending time with my daughter And I love doing that shit with the videos But when I take it to those mommy and me classes Because I'll go with my wife to them sometimes We went to picture day the other day And I had a great time I just sit there and watch And I learned from them

You know, I learn, oh my God That's why you bring kids around You know, and it's not that we're imitating somebody We're imitating and that's where the art comes in We're doing it our own way And then we figure out how to do it the best way You know Maverick came to the shows the other day.

Maverick is a kid that's listened to the podcast is day one. He's a producer, and he sent me a bunch of shirts from the show on A&E with the beards. Doug Dynasty. And the other day, and I came up to me, shook my hand, and we were at the bar in Santa Fe, and he goes, you know, man, I really like what's happened to Lee.

You could see where Lee has chains and come out of his shell in many ways. It's not because you're trying to be Joe. Diaz, it's because you saw different avenues. And I learned a lot from you. But I saw different avenues. I saw what. Sometimes you see what's important and what's not important. Because of what

happened to me early on in my life, I got to see what was important and what wasn't important. I didn't have time to learn. I had to just fucking erase shit. Like, this ain't going to work. This is, this is, and I always knew that I can help other people because a lot of people run scared.

Jesus Christ, do people run scared? And nobody was more scared or is more scared than me. Nobody. In the morning, when I wake up, those things I write on, that's what I have to tell myself to want to go out there and stab a motherfucker. I got to push the extreme in the mornings. Nobody's more scared than me. But you, you know, you see what you could do without.

And that's what I've always laughed at society about, what you could really do without and still prosper and still be a human being. Yeah. You know, what you could really do without. And that's what I always try. I hope that's what people take from this podcast. You know what thing you could do without in your life? Fucking fear.

Fear of anything or anybody. Because it doesn't matter. The worst thing they could do is fucking kill you. That's pretty bad. Who gives a fuck? But you die trying. You die trying. And that's a better feeling.

We got a call? No. That's a better feeling somebody kicking you in the fucking stomach or you saying I can't do it. Do you know what I'm saying? That's the worst. That's the number one thing we have to get rid of. But then there's little things.

Like I drove for 10 years without a fucking license. you know what I'm saying why everybody's running scared you don't want to tell you here as soon as you move to L.A. You got to change your license plates. No, you don't. No, you don't.

You know what I'm saying? And even then, it's like what I was telling Damon the day on Friday. Things about flying. Oh, yeah. When you fly, if I pull up and I see a fucking line of people

on American Airlines that from now to shit and the first class line is open, I jump on that first class line. I mean, I get scared. And before you, that lady says hi. You stick your fucking.

license in that machine and you start working on your plane think about the time she comes over and says to you you're not first class go Jesus I'm so sorry I didn't know I thought and what's gonna tell you go back to the line no you already stuck your license into the fucking machine and got the computer paperwork going it's over okay she's not gonna cancel and make you go back in line they're gonna say this time we'll do it next time don't do it again who gives a fuck about next time you won't next time I come here you won't be at the counter anyway geez we didn't tell them what happened

I think it was last Monday before the podcast We went to breakfast And he started yelling at cops Oh yeah Oh it was so scary I was driving I was driving a breakfast And the cops there was an accident And cops pulled people over

Tell them what the cops were doing In the middle of the freaking street And it was annoying It was causing traffic at rush hour Which is bad already But you roll it down the window And you're like Use your brains, cock suck

Use your fucking brains And I was trying to get at his lowest It's a rush hour And you got the car parked In the middle of fucking street for some lady who got a fender bender pull your fucking car over it's fucking what time was it lee am i 8 30 in the fucking morning how much traffic is there in los angers this is fucking car and that's not the first fucking cop that does it they do it all the time on the highway on the highway to pull somebody

up because who gives a fucking 30 there in the HOV lane it's fucking 8 30 get the license plate and send them in the fucking mail but you're gonna pull somebody over a fucking 10 after 8 to give a 2nd a little fuck get the fuck out of here that's not being a cop that's being a fucking idiot. You're supposed to serve the community. When you pull over on Lancashim because there's a homeless guy taking his dick out and two cars like that and I got to go around them, that's not protecting the

fucking community, man. You know, there's a big thing in L.A. going on right now about fucking cops dying. Hey, I sympathize with the families. I sympathize with everybody. But you live by the sword, you fucking die by the sword. L.A. police don't fucking shoot nobody in the leg, man. They shoot people. In this fucking town, they shoot their kill.

They do? Oh, fuck. Read the pair. Every day. They had a shooter guy who had a gun. Shoot them in the leg. Shoot them in LA two times. In LA, they kill everybody. Oh, Jesus. They kill these cops kill fucking everybody. So you live by the fucking sword, you die by the fucking sword. Some cop was in the lightning got hit by a fucking drunk driver woman.

Killed two weeks ago. My sympathies go out for the fucking family, but Karm is a motherfucker. Just because you got a fucking badge, don't mean you could double park or do what the fuck you want to do. You gotta be a cop, but you also gotta be a human fucking being. When I grew up, I was a bad person. I did some bad things. But thank God the cops I dealt with were here.

human beings. They came to me and said, what happened? This is what happened. You want to arrest me for two kids drawing their fucking hands up? Really, over a parking spot? Take us around the corner, sit there with the cop car with the lights on, watch us fight it out, and then put us in the car and take us fucking home.

But these motherfuckers now with ticket, but then they wonder why the jails are packed, because they forgot to be human beings. The police department is corporate now. It's like everything fucking else in our lives. Everything has procedures, this and this and this. and this, whatever happened to be a fucking human being.

I pull you over. I know who the fuck is speeding. I know who has to get to where the fuck they're going. I know. You don't think you know when somebody's fucking playing you? You fucking know. But there's people that are just trying to live, and then you pull them over and break their fucking balls. You follow me? It's just, you know, so you live by the fucking sword, you die by the sword.

I've always said Karma 101 is a motherfucker. And I'm not happy about that of people's fucking lies. I know I'm going to get backlash for saying this shit. But it's true. You pull up to something. There's people who have mental health. health issues. We just wake up on morning and get a fucking accent standing in front of the house and wave it around. You know what? You shoot tear gas at that motherfucker and you shoot them in the

fucking leg with a 22 and you take them to fucking mental health facility. They don't see it like that no more. They come in, they'll shoot your fucking dead. Maybe you forgot three days to take your medication. People forget to take that medication all the fucking time. So a guy gets a, they didn't shoot Martin Lawrence when he was naked on fucking whatever, you know? But they'll shoot a motherfucker in this town, man. And then they wonder why of getting killed because karma is a motherfucker karma's a fucking motherfucker yeah you see that a lot more with animals like dog

and stuff that always breaks my heart what's going on the last three years with these people shooting fucking dogs shooting a fucking dog yeah shooting a fucking dog do you know what comes back to you when you shoot a dog you know what happens to your fucking asshole something terrible I hope you know Michael Vic apologized to it but Michael

Vic lives in fear Michael Vic lives in fear you ever kick a cat or do something bad to an animal with karma you have a gentle animal yeah there's some animals out there looking to bite you. I could see, you know, I was sitting there day yesterday. If I'm at the park and I see a dog going to bite myrish, I got to kick him in the fucking neck. And I love animals,

but I got to kick him in the neck. It's either fucking, I got to go for the juggler. I just posted that today. You go for the fucking juggler. What are you going to do? I'm going to hold him back. How old police? I got to kick that fucking dog in the throat. He's about to bite my fucking daughter or my fucking son. Right. Were we supposed to have a call? Yeah. Okay.

It is. What's up, brother? Hey, what's going on, kids? You bad, motherfucker. I haven't had you on for a while, and I just wanted to talk to you about a few things that have been bothering me lately. Well, let's do it, bro. You've got the floor, my man.

Danny B. on the phone, one of the last fucking real savages from my society back in Jersey. A rare breed, a very rare breed, to say the least. You know, Dan, how's it. Last week I was talking to these guys about the movie The Thief, how I watched the end of it, and I broke into tears, because that's why I wanted to be in 1983. That's why I wanted to be in 1984.

That's why I wanted to be. in 1985. I wanted to be a thief and I want to shoot people. And it was so sad that here I am today and I'm not a thief and I'm not shooting people. But that was the mindset I had, you know, and I changed so many ways. I mean, Danny, you used to get a call every 10 days. Have you seen Coco? He robbed my fucking house. That cocksucker, somebody took, you know, it was every fucking. Dude, I was the one of a few that always had you back.

You know, everybody was a finger point there until you went to Hollywood. Now they're like, there he is. This, Coco, I go off with him. That's my boy. Thank you. Yeah, fuck everybody. Thank you. Thank you.

Now you know why the way I am, like that fucking Facebook and shit. They always, even when I moved, even when I left New Jersey, I was still getting blamed for robberies. And it's funny, Danny, that we changed. Hey, they do this. I'm sorry, brother. They do the same thing to me, too. Oh, I know. You and I are the fucking scapegoats.

You and I are the scapegoats that they don't even talk about no more because they're embarrassed, because we weren't supposed to be around. We were not supposed to be around. And it's funny how, you know, Danny, we've changed. We used to, you know, we had a funny conversation yesterday about selling weed, you and I, how? For 20 years, we sold everything, and now that weed is legal, we want to do something else. What the fuck? We should be selling weed now.

Now, now it's legal. It was easy. It was hard before. How about this? A Biancolo bar. Danny Biancolo bar. A Danny Bianculo bar. It's heavy, it's dirty, it's 300 grams of reefer, 8 grams of protein, and 2 grams of blow.

wrapped up in a bazook for that last fucking edge. Fuck your fucking energy drink and all that bullshit. But you know what, Danny? Every time I see you and I look in your eyes and I hug you and I, you know, we changed. We have families now. We have a wife. You know, we don't stay up all night.

We don't give a fuck of what's going on. But the one thing is we really didn't change, Danny. You and I really didn't change. We could still fucking flip that switch in the middle of a fucking butt. We didn't change our values, Danny. I'm from North Bergen, just like you. We never went out of our way to be fucking cool.

We just knew that when we walked in the room, you had to suck our dick. That's just the way it works out in my life. You know, confidence, yeah, I still do that. I walk into the room, I don't give a fuck. You know, I want you to like me, but if you don't, I don't give a fuck, you're not going to hurt my feelings.

You know, I'd like to get along with as many people as possible, but you know what? It's not the case, so I walk into a room like I own a place, you know, and that's just me. I've always done that. And same with you, man. No matter where you were in life, balls on your feet, you know, broke, whatever.

You always walked around. See, it's not what you have. It's what they think you have in life. So you've got to carry yourself with confidence. Because if you do that, eventually shit comes your way. I mean, you're a perfect example. I'm a perfect example. And it's only a handful of guys like us in that whole area, coax.

That I go back there, I saw the crew in January. You know, we did okay. That's all I'll say without pointing, fingers are saying, go fuck yourself, go fuck yourself, go fuck yourself, we did okay. It's funny how I'm not a lot of the things I used to be, but I'm still that core person and I'm proud of it. I don't know, you know, last week, two weeks ago, the owner of the Clippers got in trouble. It's all over the news, the chick, the fucking dude. I like to see, you know, and everybody's like in shock, Danny about it, that this, they can't believe they said it. For once,

I like to put cameras or tape recorders on people's minds to see what they really fucking thought. You know, to see what they really thought. And it's like... Go ahead, buddy. Go ahead, buddy. I'm sorry. No, I just, you're right, man. I know when people are looking at me, I know deep down what they're thinking.

I know they can smile them. I know what they're fucking thinking 90% of the time. And listen, everybody's got a bit of prejudice in one way or the other. You know, what he said, you know, I wasn't there. You weren't there. I mean, I don't even know that. I don't give a fuck, but listen, it's part of life. It's fucking part of life.

You know, people always going to have their opinions. People are going to say this and that, but as far as the life band, I don't know if that was necessary. Personally, I think they got a little carried away with the sanctions, but you got to watch what you say when you're in position, Coco. You don't have to, you can walk on a stage and tell somebody go, suck your dick and get away with it. But Danny, Danny, if you put a tape recorder in my house, you're going to hear the same shit you hear. on the podcast. And the same with you. The same with you, Dan.

You think I call my kids, honey? You think I call them sweet? Listen, I'm a good palpah. In my house, I'm real, just like I am in life. My kids know, they know when daddy's got a game on, a state of fuck away. They know when I'm in a good mood. You know, listen, I am who I am.

We don't change. People don't, they might get a little better, but we don't change. You have your same values. You are always good people. You're always good people that got dealt. a pretty rough hand in life, but again, look where you are now, you're traveling, you've got your little soldiers everywhere,

just happy to, I've seen their faces, they love you. I love them. I love them, Danny. I've seen it firsthand many times, and I'm so happy when I see, listen, you've always been funny. To see you on stage, it's something I've seen my whole life. You know, I just didn't, you know,

but these guys, when I see how they embrace you, that makes me happy, because you're getting the love that you really never had, You know, your mom loved you, obviously, but you had a rough life. But, you know, you never change. You're still who you are. I'm surrounded. Except for the flying Jew and people I've handpicked that have come into my life out here,

I am surrounded with people that I see them, and I drive home, and I go, how do these people live with themselves? Because 80% of what they put out is just bullshit. 80%. I tell you what, I'm worried. I put out 10% bullshit. Maybe I don't know about something. Maybe I have no knowledge.

I'm speaking fucking, I don't know what the word is, negligently about something, but I'm not claiming to be the smartest guy the world. What you see is what you see. I don't even know how half these people in LA can live with themselves. They must cry themselves to sleep every night, praying and hoping nobody really sees the real them.

I don't give a fuck. I want people to see the real me because if you don't get something, Listen, we grew up with some fucked up people, but I took little things from that. As fucked up as the... Mike Ronnie is one of the most fucked up people I ever had around my life. But he came into my life at the perfect time because he showed me that he didn't give a fuck. And that nothing matters if you don't give a fuck. Nothing really changes.

People get to know that you don't give a fuck, and either the people that don't give a fuck come to you, the people that are worried about what people have to say, they stay clear you. It's like my comedy career, bro. I don't get invited to do nothing, Danny. Danny, it's hilarious. And I sit back and I tell the flying Jew,

I'll call the flying Jew and go, watch this. They're not going to ask me, or they're going to do this. And Danny, it's hysterical, and it's for many reasons. One, because, yeah, I kidnapped the motherfucker and put him in the trunk of a car. That always scares certain people. Two, I told some motherfucker here, like people are still mad at me in the industry

because I went to awake, Danny, and somebody was there who used to torture this person in their real life, and I raised my hand for this person and told them to get the fuck out. That's why people are mad at me because I told the truth. Well, the truth hurts, brother, man.

The truth hurts. I'm so honest with you that it hurts at times, but it is the way it is. You know, people can't handle the truth. They really can. They really can't. They really fucking can.

These fucking mutts out here, you know, they'll do shit to look. I mean, I have so many people that come up to me and hug me and it's like they're all Judas's. I could feel the Judas hug and I just laugh because I know that someday they're going to have to suck my dick.

Like at the end of war pigs, when Jesus laughing spreads his, Satan laughing spreads his wings. Every time I hear that line, I'm not a big Satan guy, but I like that fucking line because at the end you're going to suck my fucking dick. Because if I know you're a Judas, I'll play you along.

I'll play you along. I'll play that Judas' hand. And then it starts, you know what, it makes me think like these people all undercover. cops. They all live their life like undercover fucking cops because you don't know who the fuck they are. I'm so proud I went to jail. I'm so proud I try to be a comic. I'm so proud I used to pick my face when I was

coked up to fucking because I hated myself. That's why I got scars. I hated myself. But I'm so proud that I am who the fuck I am. I am so fucking proud of that all these books on parenting and all these fucking Gentiles with their bullshit and their kids. You know what? Your kids grew up to be fucking holograms of a human fucking being. They're going to grow up to have a goat tea, a Sinatra hat, a fucking Prius, a fucking chihuahua, a fucking tattoo, a Starbucks, and texting to their friends about gluten.

That's what they're all going to fucking be, and they're proud with themselves. You're killing me, my. Me, I'd rather be me or you or the flying fucking Jew. salute the flag motherfuckers Hey listen man You know what The worst of friends is the family My family especially

You know There's a handful of them You know I feel How I feel about James and Greg But take that out of the equation They're all haters You know My wife

You know They're jealous about my wife Because she comes from a rough background Pittsburgh Pittsburgh You know Phyllisburg You know it's a poor town And she's got the big house

Her family's jealous And I don't even We have four people that I, in my, that's all that matters to me, right here in his house, because that's all that really cares. That's all that really matters. I have no relationship with anybody in my family other than what's in his house really, Coco. It's because they're envious.

Why is he? How did he get out of this? You know what? Because I never took fucking no for an answer. And I went to jail. You know what? You're right. I'm glad I went to jail.

These motherfuckers, half of these motherfuckers belong in jail for fucking being faggots. for fuck they should all fucking go to jail for walking around and not being themselves i think that's the biggest felony you could be is being a fucking fake that's the biggest felony in life if i was a cop i just arrest motherfuckers for being fake motherfuckers man it drives me crazy you know what i love cocoa you know we got this little uh i don't know social club whatever it's a nice little joint thursday night you got all these wannabes the real estate guys trying to close people you know They hate these fucking business guys that make fucking 80 grand here and they walk around like their hot shit

Always talking business always fucking marketing There are the fakes ones out there You know what you got me going man you got me fucking go It's Monday. That's what I'm supposed to fucking do it's Monday if you could do anything today stop being a fucking fake Rip that fucking goatee off your face and take that Sinatra hat and throw it away take your dick out and go fuck it I'm slinging dick Fuck what I'm but let the pieces fall with the fuck they made dog Dude, that's what I do.

You know, that's how I can carry myself. I don't really give a fuck, you know. I know who I am. I know my morals. I know I'm the same guy that I was years ago. I was always kind-hearted. I just, you know, got wise, and I kind of blocked out a lot of shit. You have to.

You have to block it out. I've lost more fucking friends the last two years that I've had. But they're all friends from out here, which they come and fucking go. You know, you call these people and they do it. And it's just hilarious to me. I see, I hear, like when I go to town, people come up and go, hey man, I was telling me, last night that people,

oh man, that guy's really cool. But I see, you know, you have to see people what the fuck they are. These people get confused by all the words that come out of your mouth and not people's actions. And that's why I come on this podcast, and I've opened myself up.

I've opened it up to let people know. These bitches that are talking to you, they're talking to you from a million-dollar fucking house. They're talking to you for a million-dollar house telling you about fucking life. I'm telling you, I still live in a fucking two-bedroom that I rent, and I'm still, and I love it because I'm still in the fucking heart of the game, man. I ain't the heart of the fucking game.

You know, life's simpler that way. We have the big house and all that, but we don't need it. Me and my family would be just as happy in a three-bedroom anywhere USA, as long as we're together. And I have to work still. I have it good. I have it better than most, but I have to work. I have to wake up every day, just like you.

And you're probably one of the hardest working comics out every Thursday, on the fucking road, tweeting, doing this, writing, you go home, you do comedy. I mean, who does it harder than you? Nobody. I never want to sit here and cry. I'm sick and tired of listen to America cry, and people cry. Everybody cries.

When you have an opportunity, jump on. Well, I don't really want to work 70 hours. I have a family. Fuck you in your fucking family. You're not going to have a fucking family if you don't fucking work and go out there. I want to be a good human being. I want to have time for you.

for life. What fucking life? What life? What life? I don't have it. You think that when I got guys that work for me, you know, they're on football, baseball, they help out, and then they want to go see their kids play baseball on Saturday. You know,

that's great and everything. I haven't had a Saturday or a Sunday to myself since 19, since I was in jail. That was it. And I've been working every Saturday, Sunday, holidays, because I have to take care of mine. So, when I got guys that come to, I'd like to go

see my kid well go ahead but just don't come fucking back because the day I can leave to go watch my kid play then you can go to it you know what I'm saying? No, everybody wants to go to heaven but nobody wants to fucking die. I say it all the fucking time. Every day I say that

I don't know how these fucking people expect to do anything in their fucking lives because everybody wants to do this this and this and this but nobody wants to jump into the fucking waters everybody wants to do it from a fucking and I see it all the time Me and we talk about it. I'll call me and go Lee.

Did you see what I'm going? I don't know. Look at this guy. We gave him this three months, nothing. He hasn't done a fucking, this is the same guy that'll call you. And cry or put, well, I don't have time to be on a computer all day,

but you got time to fucking cry. You got time to live your life how you've been living it. You know? And then you get mad at other people. You've got to work it, bro. You've done it. You know, nobody gave you jack shit. You know, they've seen you want.

TV they've seen you with Adam Sandler. Guess what? You still got to work your ass off, you know? That's fucking that's the way it is. And Danny, I wish they would have seen me before Adam Sandler. I wish there was a way God could send me a clip of when I lived with Fernie in

1983. Fernie? Oh my God, I missed him. I miss Fernie. I haven't seen... Fernie's a good man. I would get up. Fernie would work and I would leave his house. At 8.30, I would go to the Charities and I would get breakfast on the arm. whatever it was, $6, three eggs, bacon, toast.

And that would ask Mr. Charty for a $20 advance. I wouldn't even pay for breakfast. I'd go, can I get $20 a draw? Can you imagine that? Going to eat breakfast and asking the waiter to give you $20 and putting your fucking... So he would make me sign the $20, the $6 breakfast. I'd give him a $10 tip, and I'd say, I'd be back here by $5 to give you $36. And with that $20, I had to go out and figure it out.

So I had to take a number one bus downtown and go around the old neighbor. see who was dealing drugs, we left the window open, you know. People have no fucking idea. The 22 Hillside. I remember taking that bus. You know, that's true, too. A lot of people fucking, oh, man, we can talk all day. You can talk about somebody's people. A Charty, you said, that's a name that.

I saw Mikey a Charity a couple of years ago in Hoboken. He owns a bunch of clubs down there. I don't know if you have. Yeah, no, I know all about those guys. But it's the fucking, think of these people, think of you had a video of your life. from 1987 when I was bringing guns to you and you were giving me powder back

to take back to Colorado when I get to your house and we think about if these people really saw that shit you know a lot of people get mad at me Danny and they go oh you bring people up from your past and these kids you grew up with that you're living in your past you know when I do this you fucking jerk off to show you I'm not bullshit you motherfuckers how many other fucking podcast people could put people on

from their high school to tell you motherfuckers at home how they really were in high school. How many? How many of these fucking dudes that come on the podcast and act like Johnny Banana could really call their friends from high school and grammar school

and say, tell these motherfuckers what they don't know. That's why I have these fucking savages on, you fucking cock-suckers. Sorry about that, Danny. Well, you know what? That's okay. You're biblical. You have everybody at your show?

No, but you're right. They don't know. They don't know. I have a footage, stored footage in my mind of many nights with you, with Russo, Claire, Gary, my brother. And you're right, it is a fucking movie.

You know what? If somebody was to fucking film us all night long from 9 o'clock at night to 2 o'clock stage, 4 o'clock in the morning, 7 o'clock, peeking out the windows, running around, getting in a cab, go to New York, robbing somebody. It was fucking bizarre.

Robbing somebody coming right back and party. I remember Joey, what's the name? The Chichorelli, Joey Chichorelli. I don't know where we called them Inspector. gadget. He looked like fucking inspect the gadget. This fucking motherfucker would jump in the cab at 7 o'clock in the morning. Go rob fucking come back with 50 or

60 vials of crack. Fucking blood all over him. And, you know, they wanted it and they got it. But, yeah, I mean, I don't know how I get into Chick-Roea. Let me tell you something. It was fucking crazy times, man. Crazy times. No, they wouldn't believe it.

They wouldn't believe it. And that's why I put Timmy Holloway on. And anybody else that called me and go, I want to come on. I want to show you people where I am. Now I was then. So you motherfuckers know you could do this. This is all bullshit that they try to put fear in your hearts and you can't turn your life.

Fuck. Oh, how to turn your life around. Send me $9.95 a month. Go fuck yourself. You grab your balls, you get a knife. You make a fucking plan and you get out there and do it, motherfucker. Here you go. Eight months, 2004.

Jamie's eight months pregnant. I'm worked millions of dollars. Life is going fucking smooth. It's like I used to drive around waiting for something bad to happen. You have to. You have to. You have to. Then I fucking, I remember the knock on the door, April 8, 2004, James Schmidt, upstairs.

I'm thinking that they fucking, that he did something with the rent the car I got. I'm Jamie's like, the cops are out the door. I'm like, the cops. I said, what the fuck did he do? Hope he didn't do anything with that call last night. Open up the door, the guns to my head, fucking mass, seven different agencies there, fucking stripped all the money out of my account. You know, lost everything.

that I worked hard for for 10 years after I got it. Did I give up? No. I didn't give up. I did my six months of house arrest, my probation. I got back in the game and I made my fucking millions back. And I lost some along the way. But I got right back on my horse, Coke. So all the guys, oh, he made millions. He made this. You know what? And I paid the fucking price along the way. But ultimately, my ultimate reward was what I got now. And you never, ever, ever sold your soul like these motherfuckers. That's the other thing. That's the thing what about that dude that was twitting us talking about all your friends with Danny he did time what did you do you suck the dick and I'm supposed to take your

word for granted with that sperm breath get the fuck out of my face you fucking cock sucker oh they're all a nuts I get them Danny I get people fucking hit me once a day I wake up sometimes the emails that are horrible when I laugh because you thought about this all night you thought about this all night to write me to call me a fat fucking felon who gives I'm proud that I'm a fucking felon it taught I don't You know what I said, fuck you. How many times and how many times were you in a movie with Bobby fucking De Niro? Sylvester Stallone.

Adam said, so how can anybody have anything negative to say about you? No, they have to. They have to. Listen, it's in your nature, brother. It's in your, and I don't even give a fuck about the De Niro Stallone shit. That doesn't make me a man. What makes me a fucking man, Danny, is the journey. And that's what people don't understand is the journey and how you, how, how you, how

you hold yourself up as a fucking man. You know what? I never sold my soul. You know what I did my time? They came to me and said, if you roll on this guy in Aspen, we'll take... Fuck it, bro. I don't even know that mentality. I'll take my chance to do nothing. There's no fingerprints.

The dude was in the trunk of a car, and I wasn't there. Who gives a fuck? You want to do something to me... In fact, I called him last night. I called Vela last night and left him a message. I love Kent Vellon. I really do. I'm sorry about that day.

But it just goes to show you sometimes, you know, Life duplicates movies. We make mistakes. We make mistakes. Sometimes. You know what, though? But that's the thing. Dignity, man.

I got in trouble. Sam with you, I could have rolled on people. I could have took down Frank Jumper and all of those fucking guys that they wanted me to roll on and that knocked on the day. It's fucked that.

Fuck that. You know what? If I didn't go to prison, I would have been bad anyway. Speaking of prison, what are we hear from Gary? We don't hear nothing. I've been getting emails about Gary.

I got an email about Gary. once a week. Well, you know what? We haven't had no contact any of us. I think the last letter came in, last,

right around Christmas time, he's got to finish his first sentence, which I think was another three and a half years. And I don't know if they convicted him yet on the other crime,

the last bank robbery, but doesn't look good for the home team, Coke. He's probably gonna, and I think that's where he wanted. No, that's where he wanted to be.

That's where he wanted to be. I think that we wanted it more than he did. He came out, He was overwhelmed. He saw what I have. My cousin Michael does okay. And he was like he felt out of place here.

He felt like I don't belong here. He spent 20 years, his whole adult life. He was never right in the head to begin with. So I feel like he ultimately, he wanted to, because he kept saying that, if I just want to go to the beach? I'm like, was that your goal when you got out of jail to go? The first day he got out that I saw him anyway,

he was telling me he wanted to take down some fucking drug lord break him out of a federal prison in Tennessee that there's a $30 million reward on him. I'm like, so this guy's got to hold that money, and they pick you? You? Out of all the people that they can approach him prison to break a guy. So I'm saying, so what's the plan? He goes, well, he's on chemo. So we're going to find out when his doctor hours are, and we're going to intercept him.

I said, so we're going to, how are we going to do this? So I'm just playing along. So I knew right out the door, Coke, that he didn't. So I said, let's go. Let's go get you a good lunch, because I figured that might be his last. So I kind of knew out the door that Gary. He didn't have long for his time. And what do you make it, six months, if that?

I think that's about it. He made about six months. How's baseball season treating you? Baseball? You know what? I had a good run. Last week I got some manage slapped on me. It happens.

I had a bad run last week. We snapped out of it a little bit. But hit and miss, it's been a tough playoff. The second round's been better than the first round. The first round was fucking crazy. Dogs, dogs and dogs. But baseball is baseball. It's a long season.

Ups and down. And I think we're like four or five games over 500 for the year. We're not lighting it up. We're not getting hurt. But it's a series of runs, man. It's just, it's not easy. I'm dealing with a lot of good guys now, so I'm networking. But, yeah, baseball is baseball.

We do well. I'm fucking hoping the Mets win a fucking World Series here sometimes soon. But not a good. I don't know. So what else? is up with you, brother. Are they any good the Mets? Huh?

Are the Mets any good? No, you know, I'm always a Mets. I'm fucking, I always remember. You remember Jose Cananoico? Yeah, yeah, yeah, with the thick glasses. Yeah, yeah, tough kids. Yeah, he, uh, he owed me some loose for a long time. I'm up at Hashways fucking getting some fucking booze and whatever,

milk or whatever, and I'm gone longer than I'm supposed to be. I fucking come back. My mother's like, yeah, Conanico was just here. I'm like, Canonical, he owes me the money. She goes, she goes, no, she was going to take you to game six of the World Series. So, yeah, the Mets. Getting back to the Mets, the last time they did anything productive was 86. But, yeah, speaking of Canonical, yeah, he had tickets for game six.

And I just wasn't home. Probably was snort with Hashway and this fucking game six because of that. But the Mets, Yankees, men. I don't know. I had Tori on my show. That was pretty cool. Had a chance to talk to Mike Torrey. He's a good old boy.

Jason Abramon was his pretty good friends with him. They came for the shows in Florida. They brought Tori with them. Oh, really? Yeah, nice guy. Very nice guy. It was shocking. Very shocking how nice and genuine he was.

You know, I had a good time. We got pretty ham, and I went out to that baseball dinner. That was a nice experience, man. If anybody out there, you like your baseball, anybody can buy a general ticket. You go to that baseball writer's thing in New York. Coco, it's wonderful. You get all the celebrities there, all the baseball great, Hank Aaron made me cry. You know, it's just a nice time, man.

But, you know, I've always loved baseball, Coco. Always. You and all the boys, and you used to go to Shea Stadium and fucking Yankee Stadium and bring 20 people with you. Danny, where can they find you? Danny B wins still? I don't even know my shit no more. On Twitter, it's Danny wins for you, something like that.

Danny B wins? And then you're offering any plans this week for baseball? Nah, you know, I just got my regular stuff. I'm kind of like, you know what, Coco? I'm not really pushing much right now. I'm just doing my thing, you know, and this is the time of year. They can go to my website, Danny Winsfor-you.com, check it out. But I'm not really pushing much.

I'm making some changes, that's why. I'm in the process of getting a website with, like, five or six good handicappers and just kind of being the pitchman for it. I'm getting burnt out with this. I want to take a different... I want to find some time for myself, because, you know, I'm getting up there. And so I'm thinking about networking

where I get a website and I recruit five or six top guys in the business, and, you know, just trying to do something a little different, something to shake it up a little bit. Because I'm not radio guy, Coke, but I'm missing all of this fucking internet shit.

Guys are making $200,000 a month selling fucking sex on income. That's crazy. We've got to figure something out. I love you, cock sucker. And we'll call talk again this week. I just want to talk to you about manhood and what the fuck we've put together now.

You're one of the few guys, you, Jimmy Villano. A couple guys, man. You see these guys and they're still fucking men. I got to come out of here and deal with these fucking mooks. You've been promising. Stay with me. We'll go down into stands, have a good time. And that would be nice.

I miss Jimmy Valano. He was a stand-up. I haven't seen Jimmy 25. I grew up a lot of good people. Now I'm surrounded with these fucking soul fucking salesmen. I love you, coxucker. Stay black. Yeah, thanks for having me, man.

Always, I just wanted to talk to you. I had a good time with you yesterday. I love you, cocksucker. Yeah, I got you, bro. Give me a wife and kid a kiss and all that stuff. Lee, take care. Thanks for having me, my friends. Love you.

Make it a good back. You too, buddy. Thank you for the balls today. That's how the fuck we do it, Lee. I'm just getting sick and tired of these fake motherfuckers, Lee. I'm so high. I pictured you that entire conversation. like you were in like an old Italian restaurant

both wearing like wife beaters and you had spaghetti meatballs and it's flying the entire time it's fucking Monday it's fucking Monday motherfuckers I'm not gonna let you go out there half fucked up you gotta go out there with some nuts tell these motherfuckers to suck your dick

you got a dream and it's bigger than that fucking dream let me give some shout out to my main man Andy Huggy Bear Allen keep fucking fighting you bad motherfucker Noah Zart what Simon Patau Sandman, I love you. Tracy, stay in the fight,

and Billy Anderson, you're a bad motherfucker. You understand me? Talking about bad motherfuckers. I went on Stasia, and then I mixed the Matt Brown fight, and then I came out to it all on Twitter, and then last night I got home,

and it was on. I taped it. I taped it yesterday, and I watched it two fucking times. You know, I'm going to call Matt Brown today. He's got to be on the show Wednesday, but I'm going to try my hardest. to get him on because I cried when I watched that.

He cried over the patience. I cried over the balls. I cried over his never say die fucking attitude. And when I see that, I know that I'm on to the right thing. There's still people that have that. You're going to have to fucking kill me to take me out. It's like me with comedy. I don't give a fuck no more about these people. I'm going for it, Lee. I'm going for it. I'm done. I'm done with these motherfuckers. You know, so that's it. That's why today's podcast a little on the powerful side I'm a little sick and tired

and I know people at home sometimes you get sick and tired they shit and it's time to fucking pick it up if these motherfuckers don't give you the respect and the love you deserve you know as a human being that you're a nice person then you gotta go back to basics

and take it from and that's the old-fashioned way so we're going forward with the church I'm just letting you motherfuckers know let's start with our fucking sponsor hey wait wait we're talking about Matt Brown here what the fuck was getting emotional what the fuck dude

no that was tremendous And the kid's silver, my heart goes out to him. Because he took 80 fucking knees to the head, and he never went down. Towards the end, you had to go down. I mean, that kid's got a headache today. That kid can't think straight. He's not going to think straight for a week.

It's a shame, but Silver put his heart out there. I've never heard of him before. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's been around, and he's one of these guys that he's fucking great. I mean, those liver kicks, and he kept getting them with him, those stomach kicks. He's great with his fucking legs. His jih Tijitsu's great.

It just wasn't great enough for Matt Brown. So Matt Brown's a soldier, but fucking Eric Silva, I give him my heart too, man. That was a great fight. You know, the UFC has some fucked up fights coming on, but that one was good. That one was really fucking good. And it just, now you know why I had him on the podcast. You know, let's talk about something that I have a lot of fear in my daily life, and sometimes I get intimidated. But sometimes I get intimidated, and I go, what the fuck is wrong with me?

Fuck this motherfucker. I bumped into Matt Brown elevator once. I never shit my pants that much. His energy is real. His energy is intense, and it leaks out of his pores. But I know people who are intense for wrong reasons. He's intense for all the fucking right reasons because the energy goes somewhere.

It goes into his gloves, which gets punched into your fucking head. You know what I'm saying? A lot of people have that weird energy, but they can't do nothing with it. He lets it go. And he boils it up at the end. He brought his fucking twin boys up there. I mean, I love Matt Brown. And I thought he called up.

everybody I thought he was gonna call out Johnny Hendrix's barber you know this guy that guy fuck it yeah when you you know when you're on that much of a row you just start calling motherfuckers out the barba the guy who trims his beard seven in a row right seven in a row wow what the fuck is going on who's we're gonna have to put the sound proofie in the window but it's okay I didn't know they have construction now every fucking place we go to early in the morning got some fucking dilemma now I got the construct show brothers next to me what the fuck Anyway, I was having a hard time sleeping on the road. I had a hard time sleeping last week.

My sleep comes and goes. I'm tired in the daytime. Sometimes I drink green tea at night, and it keeps me up even after I fall asleep. I fall asleep from being tired. But the green tea, the caffeine, stays in me and shit. And I don't even know what the fuck was doing. So I got home yesterday, and I wasn't jet lag.

The fucking flight I flew back from Santa Fe from. It was one of those Wright brother planes, those little labom. Oh, you were hating, even. Oh, my God. I put my iPod on, I closed my eyes and put the fucking hooded sweatshirt shut out of my head, and I just cried. That's all I could do on those La Bamba flights, because you think the fucking, and something about Santa Fe that I don't want to forget that I had a really good time

was the guy who read the place. Zach. Okay. I deal with a lot of fucking managers, a lot of people in the business. This guy was the top of his game. And when I tell you, this young man was at the top of his fucking game. I don't know what his last name. I just know him as Zach. I know he's half Spanish and he's one of the elders on the tribe.

What made him so great? His positiveness, his how good he was as a manager, reflected how good he was as a leader. I could see how people respect him. He was on the money with us from A to Z. There was no stomp, anything we wanted, we could have had. I mean, anything, anything. It was just a matter of time. You know, he was that much. The food I had in San New Mexico, at that casino was so fucking good. What do you have? Like authentic Mexican food from the South Wet, like that part, because there's different

styles of Mexican food by region, especially in this country. There's the Colorado, Denver, New Mexico style with the green chili. There's the stuff you get here in San Diego, and there's the stuff you eat in Mexico, you know? But the, you know, and every, every, when you go to Chicago, their tacos are different. You know, the highest concentration of Mexican people. are not the southwest. It's above Michigan.

Really? Yeah, Michigan has one of the highest concentrations of Mexican people. When I do shows out there, Latino Fest and shit like that, the food was outrageous, but none of the Mexican food I loved because I was in Colorado 15 years,

so it's all green chili-based, and I fucking love it. And then you have the Tex-Mex. I'm sorry, you have the Tex-Mex, which will be fucking tearing down this fucking week. Oh, shit. With papacitos and all the fucking joints. another buddy taking us to a more authentic place.

We're going to pop a doughs. We're going down, baby. You know, we won't have a time to go to chewies. We just don't have that much in us. Right. And I'm not going to be smoking wheat until Saturday, so the appetite will not be there. We're going to get somebody to stand on line for us.

Well, we'll get some edibles. Oh, shit. I go get some barbecue. You'll be eating edibles from midnight. You'll be on probation edibles. After this week, you get your strike back. Oh, God, man. After this Monday, you get your strike back.

But what I was trying to say was, with all the sleeping and all that shit, when I came home yesterday, I was sitting there a little confused. I knew I had the baby in the afternoon. I knew I had to do things with the family. And I took an on it, turn around 180. And let me tell you something, guys. My day was fucking made.

On it just keeps getting better and better and better with their products. I went on their webpage last night. I mean, every time I go on their webpage, I learned something. I read about something. There's something on there that I could be using. Maybe it's not the alpha brain. Maybe it's digestive enzymes. Maybe it's their kettlebells, the plain ones.

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Do you see how many things we got on Twitter this week that people can receive the dollar shave clubs? One guy got a pin for being there for fucking forever. Let me tell you something. Dollar Shave Club, people, do what you do what the fuck you want. You want to keep. fucking getting fucked up razors and all of it go go be my hell I'm trying to save you some

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Then pick the option you want. $1 gets you four blades a month. It's two, I think it's two, three, and four. Four. So, guys, you cannot fucking lose. I live with this shit every fucking day. I love it. I take it on the row with me.

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I get tweets every day. Go on my wall. You can look for yourself. People always. Thank you for the patch and the fucking letter and thank you for Dollar Shave Club. Well, thank you for Hulu Plus. I ain't fucking around either when it comes to Hulu Plus. Two weeks for free.

I'm talking about tremendous fucking movies. I even had to write them down because I can't believe it sometimes. From fucking modern family. I mean, just the dramas, revenge, the Sleepy Hollow, Nashville, Castle, Chicago Fire, fucking kids' shows, SpongeBob, Sam and Cat, fucking comedy, modern family, Saturday Live, South Park, to Kobe. report, Bob's Burgers, reality, you got shark tank, kitchen fucking nightmares, Marvel's agents of shield, you got documentaries, you got fucking sports, you got Latino. Enough, you got animation.

Go, go now, Huluplus.com. What are you pressing the box? Your first, Joey. Joey, J-O-E-Y. You get two weeks gratis, two weeks underarm, two weeks for free. Try it out. Fucking sit there to your ass gross roots. Watch everything.

Tell me it's not worth $7.99 a month after that. And I'll tell you to suck my dick and call me shorthy. I was born in 1940. Go to Hulu Plus. Right now. Why fuck around. What's the fucking code? Joey.

Joey, get two weeks on the arm. You can see everything. All the shows I fucking told you, all right? Also, to my brothers at escapoddank.com, making it fucking happen. What they did was they got to Just Tank. And they're going to give you. What the fuck they're going to give you? $250, okay?

Just off. No, $150 off to Just the Tank model. Go to fucking... Escape Pondon. Tank.com, go to their web page, read what they have to offer you. You got a question, go to the 1-800 line. Call Jeremy, Jeremy, I'm thinking about this fucking isolation tank, you know, Epson Salt, what?

Talk to fucking a guy. You've thought about it. You go float around with these tubs with these people that whack off in there. And now you've got to soak in Epson Salt and somebody's sperm sticks to your fucking neck. You don't need that shit. Do this in your house. You have to get fucking somebody's fungus. Call Jeremy, 1-800.

Go to fucking EscapeBot Tank.com. Just for mentioning us, let me put you this way. The tanks, they have a high quality, tremendous. Now, if you go to any other tank companies, and look what they got to offer you, you're going to save two to three grand with a skate pod tank. What they're going to do for you today, and every fucking day is when you call,

just look at the just-a-tank amount. They're going to give you $150 off that alone. If you mention the church, Joey Dears, Joey says, balls, leaves asshole, the Israeli flag, boo-ya! You get $250 off. They'll deliver to your house. It's going to cost you an extra dough

If you want them to come out and fucking install it, you could. You have somebody locally install it. Whatever you do, go for a skate pod tank. What I do with you, these are not sponsors. I'm trying to save you motherfucker's money, all right? Get your shit together. Scapepod tank.com, on it.

Hulu fucking plus and what's the... Dollar Shave Club. I'm sorry. I got a little fucking confused. So what did you learn today? You know what we learned today? Who the fuck are you? Who the fuck are you?

80% of you are you fucking bullshit in yourself and trying to bullshit the fucking people around you by getting... I got a tattoo. Look at me, I'm cool. Cool, cool. What the fuck? What is the word fucking cool? When I was a kid, it was a fucking, the big thing was to be a fucking man to sling dick with three hands. That's cool. What the fuck is wrong with you?

You fucking maggots is America. Get it together, Coxuppers. What else, Lee? What do you got? I mean, why live with yourself if you're a fucking phony? How can you live with yourself? You got to be scared. They're going to find out I'm weak.

I don't know. What the fuck? Just be yourself. If they don't like it to suck your dick. the fuck that the church is all about telling people to suck your dick and doing what the fuck you want to i'm not going to show up here with these guests that are better than you i don't need that shit nobody's fucking better than you people you people are better than half these motherfuckers on these podcasts trying to talk down to you oh and meanwhile they sit in their fucking million dollar

homes fanning their dicks what the fuck do they know about the struggle what the fuck do they know about fear or fucking or fucking or fucking having fucking addictions or having problems that's what puts us together as this fucking army that we are with a big dick army of this fucking country. What Lee, motherfucker? What'd you say cuck, sucker? Nothing. I, I there's nothing I can follow that up with. I like big dick or me though.

You like that, the big dick army. And it's not having a big dick, it's having a lot of fucking heart and balls, you know what I'm saying, like Matt Brown and silver and shit? What's up, Lee? What are your plans for the day? You've done for the day? What are you? No, I got Rick Ramos tonight. What movies are you talking about? I don't know. He changed it up, but I have to call him. He had

a couple options. But I saw a movie over the weekend. I saw that New Neighbors one. What did you think, brother? It was actually pretty funny. It was actually pretty funny. It's not, but we talk about it a lot where it's funny, he-he-ha-ha, but it won't stand up. I won't watch it in five years, but for that one, for that two hours in the movie theater, yeah, it was pretty good.

Listen, you go to a movie for it to take you away. That's why I always tell you I can't go to the movies in the daytime because I'm not taking away. Yeah. I'm focusing on I should be doing something constructive. to advise you. Movies for me, like I said, I got two, three hours, and it takes you away for two, three hours. The best thing is when you go to a movie, and it's fucking great.

It's great. You forgot about why the fuck you went into. The worst thing is when a movie's so bad, you feel worse than you did when you went in there. And that's what happens to me, fucking six out of ten times, and I go to the fucking movies, and try to try to watch the other shit, you know what I'm saying? But what else did you do this week? You saw the girlfriend? Saw the girlfriend last night. You went to Porto. What kind of cake did they give you?

Trace late cheese. That's what it tastes like? Trace late chase. It's pretty good. I haven't had it that much But it's It's kind of weird Because it's like they soak it in milk I don't know how they get the milk in there It's like evaporated milk

Evaparated milk But it was pretty It's fucking sweet But yeah it was good And it's I can't tell you how important it is For guys out there And what a difference it makes

When a girl's parents like you Like I like How important is it for you because were Terry's parents cool with you from the beginning? Or how did that process go? Listen, man, I've never been with a woman that had parents like me from day one. I've never been like what the girl in high school, her parents like me. Yeah, but we're 18, 16 at that age, they really don't know what you become.

You know, they really don't know. It's funny because the parents I had when I got married the first time, Kathy, I could tell the mother like me. The mother could see what I had gone through on my face, but the father didn't like me. I didn't blame him. That's his fucking daughter. Yeah.

I was with them for two years before he reacted to me the father. You know when he reacted to me? When I went to prison, I got locked up for kidnapped. I was in jail for a few days. He came to see him, and he asked me what happened. I told him the truth. And he bailed me out. He put the bail up, and he

told me that this is the things I had to do. He helped me a lot, Lee. I haven't spoken to Ray in 20 years, my old father-in-law. I haven't spoken to Ray since 1991, 23 years, I'm going to tell you something. There's not a week that goes by. I don't think about him. And I'm going to tell you something else.

There's not a week that goes by that he doesn't think about me. That's how much we loved each other after that initial. You never know what it's going to take people to react. Yeah. Once I got locked up, he watched me if I was one of his own sons. And I did become one of his own sons. And a couple weeks ago, we did the thing about role models. And I should have brought him up.

because he really was there for me. He was the one that he was a lieutenant colon on the Air Force, and he had worked with young men. And I could see his disappointment from his own sons. His own sons didn't do what he wanted them to do. They became successful, they became roofers and whatnot. But he wanted them. He was a Polish immigrant.

He worked hard in the service to overcome that thing of changing white boves, being a Polack, you know, only Polacks. He was very proud of that. And that pride rubbed off on me. He was a very proud Polak. He never made jokes about Polacks. You know, he was very proud. And that inspired me.

And I got to tell you, man, there's times I go on Twitter or on Facebook or on Google, and I Google him. And I don't have the balls to call just because I know what went on between him and his daughter after we had a divorce. And it would break my heart. I know things went on. I mean, our divorce was so strong and so painful. I know that's the part of why they moved them left. They didn't want none to do it. They just wanted to retire and they just wanted to be out of it, you know.

And someday I'll get the carrots to call them. I'll get the balls to call them and say, thank you for what you did for me those three years. You taught me that I could go back to school. That's what I got from that guy. He taught me that I could go back to school, which I never believed. I was good enough for college.

But he was like, I was a Polar. And I went to the University of Buffalo, and then I got my math. This guy got his master's degree. And he didn't get, he got it to prove a point. You know he knew four fucking languages. Jesus. My ex-wife was born in Germany.

He was stationed in German. So he was very proud of that. And that inspired me. That always, always inspired me. I still remember his face when he was sitting on the other side of his citation glass. I still remember his face. And what I expected him to treat me like

and what he treated me like, you know? And I'm really sorry that I let him down. But this is why I do this shit every day to be better. And this is what you do. You just get up and you fucking someday I'll get the balls and call him. I can't believe he's still alive. I can't believe Ray still alive. And the mother, I can't believe they're still alive.

And I feel bad about what happened between him and, you know. I mean, we went to war, man. He was scared. He was fucking scared. He got involved in it. We were going to shoot. I mean, it was bad. And he packed up.

The last time I saw him, I had to hand him, his granddaughter. I used to have visitation. I guess my ex-wife went away. Yeah? And the granddaughter was staying with him. Let me tell you something. He was a guy that was in shape. He was always in shape, but he always had a couple drinks at night.

He always had a couple gins on the rocks. And I never saw him drunk. That day when I handed him the baby, I saw him fucking drunk. Because he couldn't handle what was going on. I was his son, man. I had become a son. Like I became a lot of people's sons. And part of me let them down.

But the other part of me didn't because I move forward. Every day when I do this shit, I think of a wreck, you know. And maybe because of the power of the church, someday I'll fucking be able to call them. So we're ended with that. I love you, motherfuckers. Me and Lee, Austin, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, the 15th through the 17th. And then Lee and I again up at the Ice House, May 27th. It's a Wednesday and May 27th.

I'm in San Diego at Harris. Get your tickets now. And then after that, the summer's going to be like we're staying in. We're going to add some flavor to the fucking podcast. Wednesday will be an American flag in here, so get ready to salute the flag before we're fucking podcast. We're going back to the fucking flag. We're going back.

That's it. I love you guys. Don't forget. We have another podcast Wednesday. If you need patches or t-shirts, go to joey-deers.net. If you need Jew Radio T-shirts, go to lysoyat.com. Have a great day, and I hope. this podcast helped you as much as it helped me today.

I love you, motherfucker. Stay black. Now that the show's over, don't forget to sign up for your free trial of Hulu Plus. Hulu Plus lets you binge on thousands of it shows. Anytime, anywhere, on your TV, PC, smartphone, or tablet. Support this podcast and get an extended free trial of Hulu Plus. When you go to Huluplus.com slash Joey,

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