The Church of What's Happening Now: The New Testament - #453 - Dean Delray

Episode Date: February 7, 2017

Dean Delray, Comedian, seen in the movie "Long Shots", and the Host of the "Let There Be Talk" podcast, joins Joey Diaz and Lee Syatt LIVE in studio. This podcast is brought to you by:    Blue Apron: Go to blueapron.com/joey to get your first three meals free and free shipping!   Meundies.com Go to meundies.com/JOEY for 20% off of your first order and shipping is always free in the US and Canada.    Onnit.com. Use Promo code CHURCH for a discount at checkout.    Recorded live on 02/06/2017.
  

Playing. Gigolo. Dance for any dance. Loving you romance. Ooh, what they say. It will come a day. When youth will pass away. What would they say about me?

When the end comes I know that I was just a jigolo. Life goes on without me. So I ain't got nobody. Hey, nobody cares for me. Nobody. Sing it, Dean. I ain't got nobody. Nobody, nobody.

Won't some sweet mama come take a chance with me? Because I ain't so bad. Hit it, Lee. This show is presented by On It. This show, the church of what's happening now, is brought to you by Miundis. Meandes sends you your favorite underwear for the price of two cocktails. For limited time, our audience, the listeners of the church of what's happening now, gets 20% off of your first order when you go to meundies.com slash joey.

That's meyundies.com slash joey. The show is also brought to you by Blue Apron. I just cooked my favorite Blue Apron meal with them ever last week. It's a peanut, it's a West African peanut chicken. With Blue Apron, you can cook all of the meals you want to make all of the meals you're making at restaurants for less than $10 per delicious meal

go to blue apron.com slash joey right now check out this week's menu and get your first three meals for free with free shipping at blue apron.com slash joey. Oh shit. Yeah. Little iron maiden for you motherfuckers Monday, February 6th

the day the devil was buried at fucking sea and hitting the head. The church of what's happening now Until I find here I'm never going to come searching I'm going to find my man Oh shit The Flying Jew

Dean Del Rizzi Yeah And your uncle Joey right here baby Oh right child Oh right child Oh right child Hey oh right child Bada manabababab

Bambah Bambah Bambchoo What's happened, you bad motherfuckers? Welcome to Podcastville. Whatever the fuck. Joey Diaz, my main man, Lee Syatt, Dean Del Rey, for another fun-filled few hours of drug-induced fucking music talk. I'm your host, Flavor.

Great weekend in Nashville. If you came to the shows, thank you very much. If you went to seeing Dean Del Rey for his birthday shows in La Jolla, thank you very much. Comedy's at an all-time high, but it wouldn't be this high without you fucking people coming to the shows

and putting these fucking performances together. I mean, it's just comedy. Every comedy club owner I talk to says his weekends are crazy now. Whether there's a monkey up there or fucking Mark Maron's there or Joe Rogan, I mean, these places are packed.

And it's like a comedy fucking revolution all over again. You heard about this from the early 90s, but the time I got into comedy, they said it was, dead what I see now is a fucking comedy revolution I see Lee sweating going through changes already already I'm going and deep sweating but uh you sweating from what who knows from it seems like we took a sugar cube but uh do you think like when do you

talk to comedy club owners for comedians who don't have podcasts like do they see a dip with people who come in don't have like a they're seeing Brian Morton at the laugh factory in and fucking Chicago sells out every Saturday night. Okay. And maybe, let's say, he puts 10 people that maybe four of those people have podcasts. Wow, okay. But it's not like podcasts is like Joe Rogan or Mark or something like that.

These are, comedy is just people involved in comedy again. Yeah, but you don't need, it doesn't need to be at Mark or Joe Rogan's level, especially like if you guys had started podcasts when you were open micers, you'd have people that might be one person, but you'd have at least one person from that podcast. on this podcast now.

That's true too. That's a good way of looking at it. What's up with you, Dean Del Rizzi? Man, that fucking weed wiped me out. That Sativa fucking killed you. I don't even get Sativas. It's 24 carrot. Man.

I told you, we ain't fucking around tonight. Tonight we're taking into the deep murky, murky waters. Yeah. Of the fucking drug underworld. Fuck vice and that bullshit. This is living it. You're seeing motherfuckers living in here. We're mixing edibles.

We took liquid Sid with the ice. cube we're taking it back here we got no time to fuck around I'm not even sure was in the chocolate bar who knows what was in the chocolate who cares I don't care I find something in my pocket now I take it life's too fucking short who gives a fuck you got six hours to kill and you find something in your pocket you go for broke that's it you don't get nervous at all no I've been through hell already in back what's a what's a fucking powder or something gonna do me and when I was a kid I used to do that those that T-8 C crystal shit that fucking uh

That fucking... That's gonna be a fun night. That angel... What they used to call that, Dean Thalry? Angel Dust? Angel Dust. Angel Dust shit, but they gave it different names. Like, I'd get scared for like eight minutes.

Like, I'd make believe... I didn't know what I made believe. Like, I'd make believe. Like, I didn't know what I was doing or something. And I'd get fucking hammered, man. Dean, you okay? Yeah, man. You need some water?

You need some air? Yeah, I'm good. I'm just... Shoo. We didn't even give Dina edible. We didn't need to give them a start. Just one hit of this a T, but what's it making you feel? Just fucked up.

Good, good. Sit back, relax. Sit back, put some music on. You're the captain of your own enterprise. Word up, motherfuckers. But no, Nashville was great. The food was great. Yeah, you said you had Nashville hot chicken and it wasn't your, like, I've...

It went right fucking through me. Oh, no. It's not like spicy chicken, like with, wings like hot ones. This is chicken with intense pepper on it. I had the mildly, and I took two bites of it, and it sprinkled on the skin. The white meat is the white meat.

The skin is fucking done. Oh, no. And I ate it, and I had to go to the bathroom within 10 seconds. Like, it went down my esophagus into my stomach, and whatever I had in my stomach, it just went right through. It was like Drano. I had to run to the bathroom at this place.

It was disgusting. And then again, when I got to the hotel, I've never done that before. I had the first time in my whole life this weekend. I had diarrhea. Like, I didn't feel good. Like, I went shit like eight times this week. I don't know what I ate.

God knows what you eat. No, see, here's the thing. Whenever I post food now, people, if I could post food at like Mortons, the Ritz Carlton, and they're going to say it's lizard meat. Yeah, but you don't do that all those places. You keep going back to lizard meat places, so that's why they know. I don't go back to a lesson. What did you eat before the diarrhea?

I don't remember. Turkey Club That was it, yeah From where? Oh, you don't even want to know Fucking Barney's Beanery in Burbank I was trying to get something quick

Oh yeah, that was a bad idea That was a, but you know what I saw this weekend That was actually not bad? A dog's purpose It's a stupid, like it's a stupid movie It's one of these movies that they're doing now That doesn't really have a story But it was just nice

Like it was nice for anyone who had a pet as a kid I thought they did a good job. I don't know. Maybe I'm going to see movies that eight-year-olds go to. Where did you go see this? Burbank. I don't know. You don't want to go see that movie?

Go see what a dog does. Like I said, I don't know what's happened to you, though. What took me four years to create? You blew it in one fucking month. From a dog's life to Bonnie's Beanery for a fucking turkey club. It's like one disaster after another with you, isn't it? What's wrong with a turkey club? Nothing, Barney's fucking beanery.

I didn't want a burger. I'm sorry. I should have got a seizure. There's a thousand things in that more than E-Frey. There was nothing open. We tried to go to BJs that had to line out the door. We tried to go to islands that had to line out the door. So we tried, but it...

Just shoot yourself next time. Because that's the luck you have. Just shoot yourself. It's never going to get better. It's only getting worse on a daily basis. I have a good time. I don't know. Turkey club and the dog's life.

Unbelievable. You say I got to deal with Dean Del Rey? Yeah. Dean Dalry is fucked up, Jack. One little hit. I knew this sotiva was strong. True, man. I didn't know.

You're hearing things, right? Like a buzz. I got so high this fucking afternoon on that setiva. I heard buzzes. Like, I thought I kept putting a car engine and shit. Oh, my God. You know what? I'm going to smoke some more.

That's what we need to. Dude, this is fucking... It's a body fucking... I love that when Joey sees someone going through, like, the deepest changes that anyone's ever gone through makes you, like, jealous. You're like, I gotta get I gotta get my shit together. How come

I'm not going through those changes? Man. This is gonna be the night of the change. It's going to be the title of the podcast. Night of the Changes. Oh my God. Yeah, this the TV is fucking good, man. That shit's a fucking... That's a...

That's a hammer. Well, speaking of while I have any coherency it's weird to me last night watching the Super Bowl because these are the players that I really fell in love with when I was in high school and middle school like I think Tom Brady was in

07 or something that's when I started high school was 07 like what was it like for you guys seeing all these musicians getting older does it fuck with you at all I guess I don't really retire like athletes do yeah look at Joe Montana man I watched Tim

slowly get old and break away a king you know yeah yeah no they definitely start i mean i haven't you see some people fall too quickly with sports but tom brady's still kicking it but it's uh i don't know it's weird it's weird growing older i like the under the game fucking had me all fucked up last week because i like new england but i know the nfc has you don't get to the super bowl represent the nfc if you don't have an outstanding fucking strength command compared to an AFC team. Yeah, no. I could see somebody folding

because it was 60 points, the over and under. And the under came all the way in to the fight. You don't leave, if they would have scored a field golden one, the under still would have came in. Because it was 59.5. That just goes to show you that they have it down to a science with football bookmaking, okay? Oh, it's scary over there.

I just wanted to, I put $100 on the game on the total, the under, just to watch the fucking game. In a million years, I loved New England and the over. That was the obvious pick. That was the obvious pick. That was it right there. It was New England, and Tom Brady's going to put up 55 fucking points by himself. I did not see it like that.

Yesterday changed my world. You know, I'm reading a book called, I told Lee we're going to preview it one day this month, The War of Art, you know, and the distractions that we have as human beings and whatnot. If you looked, whether you were a football fan or not, if you have a minute, look at the last three minutes of that game and watch that man's face.

They were down 28 to 3. 28 to 3. And I talked to Lee. He still has a chance. I go, Lee, I don't know. Yeah, you were making fun of me. He's not looking good. He's not looking good.

And it shocked me because this guy, I've known him to be a tank. a white tank. He's the strongest white guy that's ever walked this fucking planet. Hands down. Him and the almond brothers. Hands down. When he, you know,

the look on his face and it just goes to prove what I always talk about in the show, man, when you want something really bad, it's there. It ain't gonna just pop up fucking mysteriously,

but if you work for shit, it's there. All those things that you put in, those practice things that you do, that you think don't really matter, you all saw last night in his performance. He was what's called unconscious.

It happens with comedy. It happens with music. It happens with sports. It happens with a lot of things. When you're putting the best performance of your life on, and you really are unconscious, you don't even know what you're doing. You're depending, or you're not depending on anything.

You're just doing what you've done for the last 20 years. the best that it's ever been. That's how you have to look at that situation. I looked at a great game last night. I mean, I woke up, and it was a minute left in the second quarter. I was in shock, but I wasn't surprised. But all I have to say is what I got from that game yesterday was if you watch fucking Tom Brady those last three minutes,

watch his face, and he got sacked. And they were getting to him, and they were turning him around. It didn't matter. He didn't give up. He knew he was winning He knew like he knew Watched the last it was on again last night I watched it late night last night

I watched the last fucking quarter Last night till one in the morning And that's what I was watching That's what we strive to be That's why they tell you to practice That's why they tell you to Do the same shit over again He didn't throw a 90 yard bomb

He didn't fucking throw any yard bomb He just did what he's been doing all his life 10-yard 12-yard darts Zip, zip, zip And those receivers You got to take your hands off Your hats off to them All of them

Orlando Julius From the other fucking team Made a catch I mean they were just You know, I don't look at it If you're fucking shallow and ignorant You could say that Atlanta choked

No they didn't They played a great game They were there all the way to the end They just got I played By the fucking best in the game There's no shame in that They played a great season. They played a great game.

They had them up against the fucking ropes. They just played against the fucking best there is. Yeah. Ever. As a coach and as a fucking football player. I mean, they went up against the fucking goods. So for you motherfuckers, giggling today, talking about Atlanta choked and whatever.

Atlanta didn't choke, man. Watch that game. That number 97, that defensive tackle. Oh, yeah. He's a beast. He's a beast. They didn't choke. What they did was got outplayed, and that's how you have to look at that.

You know, that's it. New England, my fucking congratulations, I wish I could go to your parade tomorrow because I'd run up and hug fucking Tom Brady 18 times. Me too. But I don't have the goods or the means. I got shit to do on people to see tomorrow. Maybe someday when me and Rich a Millionaires, with me and Lee are fucking rich and famous,

we could go again to see Tom Brady's son throw fucking five touchdowns in a game or some shit. Now, I made fun of it. And it's easy to make fun of. But the Lady Gaga halftime show. Didn't watch it. Turn it off. I watch the UFC conduct. I don't watch football to see people dance and sing.

Right. And I made the comment, like, it's not at all the NFL's fans, but just watching it last night, she did a good job. Like, she just, I've never seen a musician before run between, like, six songs, and, like, take no breaks and costume changes. So it wasn't at all what I think the Super Bowl halftime show would be. And apparently I just don't watch the halftime show. Apparently they'd be on say and everything in the years past.

So apparently that's what it's for. But just seeing her, like that's what I try to look at. When I'm watching something now that I don't like, I don't like, I feel like I get negative too much. Like I want to at least try to look for something positive in it. So just to see her running. And when people all over the Internet today were saying that she killed it, all her fans were saying she killed it.

So it's just cool seeing someone just doing that on the biggest stage ever. I just didn't like that shit during that time. It drives me crazy. You know, like I watched it one year. I forget who it was. Paul McCarthy sang eight songs. Yeah, it was a few years ago. Two minutes or something.

You know, it's just, I just want to see a fucking football game. I'm sorry. You might think I'm fucking retarded this. I just want to see a fucking football game. I'm not in the mood to... I got invited to 20 things. I don't want to be around 20 people when I'm watching a fucking Super Bowl.

I just want to watch the game and relax. I watch any other fucking game. I don't know why. I've always been like that. I think I went to one Super Bowl party. I saw a dip, and I'm like, this ain't for me. I think I went to a couple years ago,

me and my wife had just moved to the Valley, and this nice lady invited us to an Oscar party. It was the worst. It was the worst thing I have ever been invited to. Joey had an Oscar. I'm not from that school of thought, man.

I've never really been from that school. Like, the most shameful thing I heard was the night of the election. People were having, like, victory parties already playing for Hillary Clinton. Like, people buying new suits and new clothes and shit. That's not what the election's fucking about, man.

But see, that's what it was this year. You know, that's why we're in the state of shock. that we are now, but I've never really been like a fake party type guy. I want to go to a party to see the devil. I don't want to go to a party to mingle and eat crackers. I hate that shit with wives. I fucking, that shit drives me crazy. It always has.

It always has, man. I had the best day ever yesterday. It was, uh, we were supposed to go and actually spend it with, uh, Vicki Pez and her husband, but we, like, it just got turned around and I couldn't, I'm so happy it did. Paula made wings. best wings I've had in L.A. She's never made wings before. That shows you the shitty wings that I've been having in L.A.

It was amazing. She bredded the whole thing. It was great. Franks Red Hot with butter. That was delicious. She made mac and cheese homemade. And then she made cookies. And I was sitting in my pajamas.

It was a perfect day. It was one of those. I haven't had one of those in a while where I woke up today. I was like, fuck. There's nothing I would have changed about yesterday. You're a fucking bum, pajamas. Pajamas. You said I got to deal with it.

Are you back to ground zero yet? Yeah. Cocksucker. That was a fucking ride. That shit was like the claw just grabbed me and just threw me down, dude. It was like, hey, I'm just like, oh, bro. After jiu-jitsu today, wow. I smoked a few bowls.

I went in the back. I smoked two bowls, and I did around my business. And I was sitting there. I go, I am so fucking stone from this fucking sativa. Yeah, that shit fucked me up Like dude, it knocked me up I didn't think you smoked You said you wanted hash

I don't have no at all I just that hash is manmade Unless I get it from the one I did you I don't fuck with it no more Well I didn't I didn't ride over I rode Uber so I was like Fuck it I'll get I'll get high And I go with the ride with you guys

Man that shit was just like It was like it grabbed me And threw me down like hey You ain't going nowhere You know, that's the type of reefer that you smoke as a teenager. Yeah. And that really makes you appreciate music. Like, I don't like that.

That was it. I always like going to concerts. I loved all that stuff. But there's nothing better for me than to get really stoned and put earphones on and blast that music. Yeah. And, you know, if you hear a song that you really like and you get into, you put it on again. You know, you're like, fuck it, put it on again. Jesus Christ, that sounded good.

Oh, you guys open with that maiden, and I was out cold. Man, it was actually kind of scary for a minute. It was like, ratchet out. That fucking bass, that bass in the beginning is fucking savagery. First time you hear that, you're like, what the fuck is that? When all the guitars come in, when that album came out in 81, that wasn't the type of music I listened to. Like, my farthest out was like Black Sabbath. lead zapplin you know maybe deep purple if i was in the mood but when i first heard that i was

like there's something about that shit that i still listen to that album oh me too i'll put the whole album on and do shit in the room and you know and move around iron maiden with bruce dickerson has never really grabbed me yeah cannot lie to you i'll have six six six the number of the beast and run to the hills and all that stuff and i know they have a plane now and they do great numbers that they just never really been for me. I do not know why. Yeah. I love that fucking number of the beast record, man.

That song, 22 Acacia Avenue. That's a good song. That's a good jam. The album is good. I just never really bought into the whole thing. I got what they were doing. By the time they started coming out with 666, the number of the beast,

I'd already seen the devil. You're not impressing me, cock sucker. You want to impress me. Go get the devil's bull. boss. By the time they came out with number 666, the number of the beast, what year was that?

I don't know, man. Run for the hills is 83. Oh, yeah, that's it. 83, because I saw him at a day in the green with foreigner. Isn't that crazy? No, it was Hart. They played with Heart. Like crazy.

I'm going to tell you something, man. People goof on Fariner. It's a couple jam. The first album is me all the way. Oh, yeah. I fucking love the first album. That long, long way to home. That one's great.

There's a couple jams on it. It feels like the first time. Is that on there? Feels like the first time's on there, too. They opened up for the stones when I saw them one year. And in 78, maybe they opened up for the storm. 79. I don't know, one of those fucking years.

And I'll tell you, you wanted not to like them. You thought they were a little on the pop side? Yeah. But they're pretty fucking good. Oh, I love you. I want to talk to you about something before I forget that we were watching before this to explain to people. You know, I was there with my own eyes when I saw Eddie Van Halen at the garden

to destroy that guitar and Black Sabbath had to try to follow him. Yeah. I think years late, I saw Van Halen again. By that time, I had grown a hatred towards, not a hatred, but a dislike. After women and children first for some reason. Yeah. I didn't like David Lee Roth no more. He had warned me out.

That poster. Yeah. Oh, that one. Getting chained up. Oh, women and children. Yeah. Yeah. But they won me over with an 81 with, uh.

Fair warning. Fair warning. Yeah. Just destroyed my insides of fair war. Crusher. And then I don't know what they put on after. Diver down. Diver down, which was Divered down.

Yeah, yeah. That was man down. Yeah. And then after that, that was it. 84. The big one. 84. Okay.

That one. The dive it down was 84. Yep. And then after that day down. before they broke up yep that was Sammy comes in yeah now the I still remember being at the Crestwood hotel in Snowmass Village yeah and sitting in employee housing I was 21 and there was a couple of people in the room that were 20 or 21 but there was this guy that was 27 that was like trying to be cool you know what I'm saying like 28 trying to hit on 21 year old girls and I got

to an argument with him that night I still remember this is clear his day but he was one of those guys like we were watching something with smoking pot and he came in like with a case of beer to be cool yeah and he's like I can't wait for Hagar and Van Hagar they get together oh and like two of us looked at him like shut the fuck up you know what I'm like he gives a fuck old man get the fuck out of it trying to be cool he was trying to hit on one of the girls I'm looking at him going I'm not even excited about that yeah like I'm more excited about the coke that's coming getting the living over here in 10 minutes I don't give a fuck about Van Hagar whatever fuck he was doing. Yeah, yeah, yeah, right? I was so into that Edemman's Smile record. I brought the Spanish one tonight. Now, that was

his first album without Van Halen. Yeah. What's on there? It's got like Yankee Rose. It's got that shy boy. Now, at that time, Stevie Vi was playing. Yeah, and Billy Sheeer. Yeah, he had a great fucking band.

Oh, great fucking band. Great fucking band. Killer. And it was so weird, like maybe two years after David Lee Roth left, and I guess by that time they had put out two albums, Sammy Hagar, man. People were begging for David Leroth to come back, and I got to be honest with you, I was one of them. Yeah. You know, I saw Sammy Hagar in the worst position.

I saw Sammy. You ever hear when people say to you, where'd you start? Oh, I started comedy in Milwaukee. Really? Do you go back to anymore? Nah. You know how it is where you start? That's where people always remember you as.

Okay. I went to like a four concert bill one time. Like a four bill concert one time. It was Black Sabbath with Dio. Wow. I don't remember who went on before that. But before that, it was Sammy Hagar with Shaken Street. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. And opening the show was who was Sammy Hagar's ex-partner? Monteros? Ronnie Montrose. It is his band. Wow. So it was Ronnie Montrose,

Sammy Hagar and Shaking Street. Somebody else opened up the Sabbath. I don't remember who it was. And then it was Sabbath. In Philadelphia, at the spectrum. Wow. One of my favorite places of all time.

All four of those, huh? But the funny thing was that while David Lee Roth was on stage, this was when I, like, I had gone to Philly a lot. Like, I was always in Philadelphia. It always seemed like I was in Philly, Philly, Philly, Philly, Philly, And the more I went to Philly, I got to be honest, I liked it. Yeah.

It was Jersey only with something else to add it to it. And the one time I went to Philly, Sammy Hagar was up on stage, just dying. I don't know what the fuck he was singing in 1983. Was it 83 with D.O. and no. It was 1980 with Dio and Sab at that tour. Yeah, 80. Yeah. 80 was?

I think 80 is the first one. Because 81 was Sabbath, I mean... Yeah, look that up, Heaven and Hell. The Heaven and Hell tour? Yeah. Well, whenever that was, that's when I saw Sammy Hagar. But then I saw Ronnie Montrose again open up for ECDC. Oh, yeah.

Later on, no, maybe... Two or three years after that, maybe. I don't know. With his band, Gamma? At the Nassau Coliseum. Oh, man. April 17th, 1980.

Yeah. They started that this is the first time they ever had this, with Dio. With Ronnie James Dio. Are you on Wikipedia? No, no, no. Dean, can you check this out to make sure I'm not checking out? No, no, that's it. That's it.

No, no, but if you're on Wikipedia, I'll tell you that. Okay. The opening bands were on the tour or shit like that. All right, let me check Wikipedia. But they were, people were spitting on their fingers. They couldn't spit far enough at Sammy Hagar. So they were spitting on their fingers, flicking their fingers. And the spit was coming up on Sammy Hagan.

He's trying to dodge it. Oh, my spit flickers. Spit flickers. Oh, my God. That's how disgusting. It was spit flick on him and shit. And spit was coming from every fucking angle at this poor bastard. Oh, my God.

hilarious, dude. And it wasn't for a while there. I know what some people at home are thinking, I know there's some savages at home right now going, Joey, what are you retarded? It was Blue Oyster Colt. Yeah. Because Blue Oostocco.

Black and Blue Tour. Yeah, yeah. Which was great. I didn't see it, but I thought it was a great concept. Yeah. I always liked, let me tell you something.

Some enchanted evening. Oh, great. By Blue Oyster Co. Kick out the jams, brothers and sisters. That's how it opens. I love it. Oh, my fucking God.

And there's something in the middle and there's Godzilla. Yeah. Oh, my fucking God. Guys, you want to listen to a good live album? The cover's crazy. Oh, my God. Some magician.

The Reaper? The Reaper. He's the Reaper going down. Oh, my God. Some enchanted the evening. by uh who we talking Blue Oyster Colt Blue Oyster Colt

Oh dude What's up dog You're looking at me all bug eyed and shit What are you feeling Lee I just feel really speedy right now Yeah really speedy I'm just glad I'm coming Once we finish the podcast

You could do a couple fucking jumping jays I could I can kill speed I had my pajamas on doing the Super Bowl Lee did you smoke any of that weed I did everything else but that weed Apparently try that out Man

Give him a little fucking lung burner. This will get you crossed-eyed, Cotsica. Oh, man. Yeah, you want to try it? This is the shit. Sure, why not I'm going to cross-eyed as it is. We'll fill it up to the top here for a league. We'll make a special.

Man, that weed is strong. What kind is it? It's called 24-carat from Perennial. 24-carat? Fucking 24-carat knock your ass out. Fuck. I was so stoned a little while ago. I couldn't even talk.

I couldn't talk at all. You know? I was just looking at Lee switching his fingers back and forth and I was like, whoa. Oh, yeah, everyone thinks I'm having a panic attack when I do this. I'm just switching the cameras.

There you go, buddy. Seenius having a panic attack. Wait until he takes three hits of this fucking month. Yeah. There's the real deal tonight, people. Monday, February 8th. February 6th, I'm sorry.

Yeah. They're fucking around. Yeah. Some enchanted evening's good. Oh, yeah. Then they had another album after that. Yeah, they had the one with Don't Fear the Reaper on, which was They got, what do they got?

Agents of Fortune, hold on, let me look. Man, I'll tell you the good ones. Okay. Blue Oyster Colt. Uh-oh. What happened to Lee? That's what happened to Lee. That shit's a killer.

This fucking reefer I tell you, this weed is crazy Oh my God Look at he's got drool from his beard Look at him Look at him He looks like Simbad to sailor Give me that fucking pipe

I'm smoking that all the way down You want another hit of this? Dean I can see where you went Oh my God All right, it's a lung killer It lit my lungs on fire Okay here's the one Joey Okay you got

Fire of the Unknown Origin What year Okay that is let's say 81 that's a good one that's a good one you know what it's got on it look it's got burning for you remember

I'm burning I'm burning for you it's got that heavy metal song remember I love burning for you the guitars on that are fucking tremendous sick right this is a great album oh it's got their best song ever put this song Lee Veterans of Psychic Wars

Oh shit Yeah, Blue Oyster Culp I'm telling you man That's the song If you're not into Blue Oyster Cult You should take a fucking second there Because I got into them by mistake I used to bite Coke from this dude

Randy Mergel God rest of the soul Oh my God And he used to play this album Every night when we were gagged up to the fucking gills Circa 1981 Unbelievable I was a junior in high school

Staying his house For six in the morning Snorting I'd run home Take a shower Here it is. Made of this one? It was on that movie Heavy Metal.

Yep, it's on heavy metal. This song, oh. Listen to that, man. That's a setup. I haven't heard this in 20 years. It's incredible. It's so good. That is killer, dude.

I forgot all about that. It's so good. Yeah, I got to get back into my fucking memory vault of music. I'm missing a bunch of shit that I just lost. over the years abstract shit that I used to be into yeah this to me used to be like abstract metal I never saw them live totally I never saw them blue boystico live I just saw the videos yeah I've watched some footage on YouTube but I loved the music but the live album they put out destroyed me something about you know we get

into this conversation all the time because we're both students of the 70s and the 80s what the fucks are gonna take but who's gonna do these live bands I don't want to see anybody live or hear anybody live. Unless it's something that we grew up with that knows how to do a fucking live album. I mean, Pearl Jam, you know. Yeah. Now, Sound Garden is back. Yeah.

Yep. Sound Garden. They're back, man. And, you know, there's some good live shows out there right now, like rival sons, dude. So great. I brought that record over. Queens of the Stone Age. Queens of the Stone Age.

They get rid. Oh, those guys. guys kill it. Are there Armenians? No, that's System of the Down. They kill it too. That band crushes. That crushes. Oh, I saw them at the forum like last year. It was like the 100 year anniversary of the Armenian genocide. And they did a big tour 13 places. It was unbelievable. Yeah, they were huge. I was really into them in high school, System of a Down. So great, dude. I mean, that Ariel song, you know, Arial in the sky that tune is killer oh my god now what's the other band

not system of the down but the other guys Linging Park? No Rage Against the Machine? No before that you said there's another band Oh rival son or rival son and you said the second band

They're the ones that went on Anthony Bordane show Oh Queens at the Stone Age Oh yeah So they're doing a record right now A new one I can't even wait. Last one was incredible. They're like, to me, like a kind of like a Zeppelin would be now, you know?

Like they're really intricate and cool, but bluesy, assity, you know, all over the board. It's punk rock. Oh, fucking great. My new favorite band is Hero Jr. Yeah, you love them, right? Yeah, but now what are the other bands to look out for? Oh, man. Let's see

I'm loving this That one fucking jarjira That one jam by Hero Jr. Yeah destroys me I forget the neighbor right now With the little girl Singing the song and shit

And she's like lip syncing Yeah That's a great fucking That's like a world Class fucking jam I also like those people Rogan like the girl Honey honey honey honey

I like her I like her I think there's something there for her When you don't know You can't predict The fucking future I think there's just so many bands now I can't keep up with the younger bands

You know people saying me stuff Yeah Some stuff is fucking phenomenal Some stuff is so fucking bad That's it Some stuff is so bad It's unlistenable

Oh yeah What's what What's It's called anger Um With open eyes And in between The fucking guitars.

Yeah. Sounds like a blue black crowish. Yeah. But fucking, like with the black crows is something like today. Yeah. That guitar play is a student of the game. Yeah. Listen to how raw his guitar.

Great riffs. Great riffs. Great riffs. Just bannan. You know, it just grabs you. That's what you need, a good riff, man, to grab you. somebody there's people who send me different music yeah and some music is fucking phenomenal I just don't like if they send me something I'll look them up on YouTube and I'll look at some YouTube stuff

and if I get three songs of there as a dynamite I'm like Jesus Christ yeah yeah these guys are I just got to figure out how to download it yeah yeah yeah yeah so I forget about it yeah I forget about it that's all it is I don't like it it's I forget about it I got a thousand things on my fucking plate yeah yeah man I like to like to like 30 different bands last year and I had to keep notes on them because they kept going, what was that one band called? Oh yeah, this band?

Oh yeah, oh yeah, that. You know, I got to go re-find it. And you used to go to the whiskey and the... No, I don't go to that unless it's something I want to see. Like I saw Udo last week there from Accept, balls to the wall. Udo came and did a whole set

of except songs. It was insane. Oh, man. All that shit. How much are the tickets there? I think it was 25 or something. So worth it. I couldn't believe how metal it was.

It was like an old school metal show. They had the moves, you know, like, okay, on this part of the song, we're going to go up here, you know? It was like, well done. Udo up there in his camo pants. You got your balls to the wall, man. You know? That's nuts that. You go to those places.

I'm going to have to go with you one night. You got to come out. All right. And I can't. It's just fun for like an hour. I can't go to like a big show. Like the big shows already I'm done with. But I want to go to small shows to see the smaller bands.

I think that I started thinking about comedians. I started thinking about you won't see the good comics on Comedy Central. You'll see the comics daylight. Like, if you're into comedy, you're not going to see Bill Hicks. The full spectrum that you deserve to see by just watching Comedy Central. And I'm not putting bad, I'm not saying anything bad about Comedy Central. Could you put, say it, put, same thing for like Netflix or who, wherever. Right now, I'm just talking about Comedy Central.

Okay. So I grew up listening to PLJ, right? Let's put it in any W. Great sources. of whatever. But this is what I've been thinking at the age of 54, which I'll be next week.

They were biased. They're biased like I am. They're playing music that they kind of like or they really like or they know somebody from the band, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But I don't think we're hearing the best of them.

It's like today, when I'm driving down the street and I hear rock and roll ain't noise pollution. That's the fucking last ACDC song I want to hear. Yeah. Where's fucking night problem? Yeah.

fucking what's next to the moon. Where's fucking kicked in the teeth? Where's the other one on Let There Be Rock, that it's just Such a danger. No, it's such a dangerous song. I don't smoke by no cigarettes. Oh yeah. I never

much booze, but I'm only a man. What's the chord on that? I overdose on you. Overdose. Yeah. Yeah. Down, down, down, down, down. The Angus comes in, Bown, bown, bough. Yeah.

I love that, right. Dog, I want to hear overdose. I love that song. For those about the rock, we salute you, like, I want fucking, you know, I don't want to hear that song. Yeah. By some deep cuts.

But the stations and the advertisers let you, you know what I'm saying? They have to make a living. And there's some music, and that's on that level. On, like, Sirius or something. Florentine's very good. Yeah, awesome.

I listen to Eddie Trunk today. I listen to Norton. I listen to all those guys. It's great. Do I agree with all their stuff? Not really, but I'll tell you one thing about Florentine. He buys what he sells. Oh, yeah, yeah.

Like, Jim buys what he sells, and I can't take that away from him. Whether or not I agree with his music, 50% of it, I give him props. He takes his son to concerts and shit. He's out there banging it out fucking couple nights a week. watching bands I didn't even know existed. Yeah. And me and him are close to the same age. So I got to hand them props, you know.

But I think sometimes I got poisoned with what, not poisoned. Like I got introduced to the Who and Led Zeppelin and the Beatles and stuff like that. But guess what? I guarantee there was a couple other mother love bones. I didn't get you. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Everybody always thought that sound like, you know, Garden and Pearl Jam with Seattle Sound. No, they weren't. It was Mother Lovebone. Yeah. A lot of people don't know that. Allison Chains blows me away. They still do. But Mother Love Bone blows me away. The first Sound album, still blows me away.

Pearl Jam's album is great, but it was very commercial. Yeah. It was, you know, that whole fucking album was very, like, lately, I don't know what it is, I'm hearing Alanis Morris said every fucking day. Oh, yeah. It was in 1995. Jacket Little Pill, that's the name of the album. Yeah. Every day, I hear her on either 80s music, classic vinyl,

I think she owns series. She's so rich. Imagine, man, how rich she is. Just from that out. Oh, yeah, that was like one of the biggest selling records ever. For a while, it was like, wow. For like one year it was on the charts. And she can survive off radio plays, like that amount of money.

Oh, wow. I knew the guys in Boulder who were police cops. Yeah. The guys that listened to the radio. Yeah. And monitor the music and see how much you get paid. and all that shit they're like residuals.

I knew those guys. It were like four of them. They got that car wash. Their firm got that car washed at the bubble. That's classic. It was kind of weird. So no. Lately I've been feeling like maybe I got the same broad deal for music

that people are getting to there for comedy. They just think that the comedians on Comedy Central is all that exists, you know. Yeah. So I want to see some different fucking angles. I mean, how would you guys find new bands before the internet? and how I'm imagining YouTube and Facebook and all that stuff. But how would you, when you guys were 20, finding the band. Word of mouth, man.

That's what was so amazing. How did we find music before the internet? Word of mouth. This is my brother. Like I've always told you. There's no Yelp, and I don't believe Yelp. I wouldn't go on Yelp for anything. I know Dean.

If Dean comes to me and says, I had some elk the other night and it was great. I don't like Alton, so I know that him and I, don't mitch. But if Dean says to me, I went to Rudy's, I went to Chans, and these are my restaurants, I know I can take his opinion for food and for movies and for whatever. You know what I'm saying?

Yep. So you had certain friends. You had the friends that were the people who wanted to be cool. You know what I'm saying? They bought the black t-shirts with the concerts every night. They let, you know, they went to the show, you know, those fucking clowns. And then you had people like Dean Thelow, and they just went out four nights a week, drank, got a package of a fucking blow.

And rocked out, really rocked out with a band. Fierce. Yeah. Really rocked out with a band, you know? Big fucking difference. Yeah. So I trust Dean. If Dean comes up to me and he goes, dog, I went to see Sabbath the United,

but I got to tell you something, the warm-up band destroyed them. Thank God for Sabbath. They only played four songs. Yeah. If they would have done eight, Sabbath would have had to run home and pack their bag. Guess what I'm doing tomorrow? Not even. As soon as Dean tells me, I'm like, oh, Dean, you got their music?

No. let's go to Sam Goody. Let's buy the album and a cassette or the eight track. Let's go. We go, we buy it, we wrote. We get a nickel bag, seven joints for five bucks. Dean, what times your mom get home?

Eight. Guess we're going to your house. Yeah. We'll smoke the pot outside and we'll put the fucking music on. And that was it. Are there people who would do that, like spy almost on the opening band? Because most people didn't go to the opening band, right?

Yeah, well, you know, though. He always went to the opening band. I have a feeling since he's 14. He's gone to the opening band. Yeah. When I was coming up, they told me not to go to the opening band, so I didn't go. Until one day I went. I got there early, and I go, why don't I come here?

Yeah. It's like when you go to the UFC in Las Vegas. Don't watch the undercards? No, when you got to, no, people watch the undercards. Guy, yeah. No, no, no, no. When you go to the UFC anywhere but Vegas, people are there. Did I say the fight started four?

They're there at two in the afternoon. Yeah. Two in the afternoon, they're there. Full on event. drunk it already, ready to fucking get high, ready to have a good time. When you open up the doors, when you go into an event in a foreign

city like Milwaukee or New Jersey or Texas, the places are packed by the time the prelims are on. Go to a fucking fight in Vegas. Yeah. Fucking show the

the main card is on, the main fight, and people are walking in. Like, you're sitting in the seat going, look at me. I got third row. and awesome people like, you actually showed for this? Like, really? You got some fucking pair of balls.

Four fights later. God, I'm sorry about this bottle. Got another water? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Lee, you need some water on there? I need everything you got, so, sure. Here you got, Lee. All the help I can get at this point.

That weed's crazy, right, Lee? You know, I've explained to Lee. Lee and I once, when Lee and I started working, I got Lee really high one day and I was on a roll in my living room this is before the baby was ever even a thought in that home okay And I wanted Lee to understand that you know without Twitter I want you to think of a world without Twitter without Facebook What's the name of the band you went to see you and like well Dean sent me a picture no Yeah, you know all Dean knows and on the way out he looked at their schedule on their fucking bass drum yeah and And it said Boston, October.

So I don't know what you got to do. You got to get this band, whatever. You know, that was it. There was no website. You didn't go back to your hotel room and go, oh, my God, I love the band. Let's see where he's from. You do nothing.

The name of them is Led Zeppelin. That's it. You had to buy the album to get the information off the album or get the cream magazine to read about him. That was it, Lee. That was it. But I still remember Lee and I are putting on rocks. Yeah.

And Meese is going to Lee. sit down for a second there was a rumor going around I still don't I remember this is playing this fucking day at 38th Street Park in Northburg and somebody fucking telling like talking the older kids talking 76 I'm 13 yeah 12 you know no yeah yeah I was 12 when they were talking about it because they were saying Aerosmith's done some kid was saying that was Smith's the best and they're like fuck you Eversmith's done you fucking idiot erosmith they're junkies they're done they're breaking up and all so like three months later they release rocks which is basically a fucking masterpiece yeah yeah and I remember sitting there even then

going like how did people know they're on heroin yeah like how did people in yeah north bergen new jersey know that Stephen Tyler and Joe Perry which they were during the thing of rocks if you read that book yeah I forget what the name of that they were on that holy heroin they were on fucking major league heroin they had a Chinese guy living at the house making it Like they had a guy fucking at the house like they were into it. Yeah. How did my friends know? You know, how did the word get out? Now let me ask you a question. Okay, but fuck about Erosmith and Boston in in 1975. Yeah. You had the Boston Celtics. Really? They didn't.

Well, you think, why would I? Did you see what Boston looked like last night? Yeah. Did you see pictures of the street? Yeah. Okay. Go check if the Boston Celtics won the fucking championship in 75. The Red Six didn't won. But they were good. Yeah. And New England wasn't that good. No, maybe they were. They went to the Super Bowl one time, New England. I think in 85, and they lost.

Do you mean? With Andre Tippett and those guys, they lost. But Boston was the city that was dominated by sports. Yeah. Wasn't 85 the Bill Buckner? 75. 75 was Bill Buckner? No, no.

75 is what we're looking for. Oh, you're looking for 75? I'm sorry. I thought he said 85. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

Let's see. Oh, yeah, yeah. I just want to see if they. I'm telling you, the Celtics, I don't know if they won that year, but they weren't a bad team. The Red Sox didn't win that year, but they weren't a bad team. The Bruins maybe were winning, but it was such a city that was dominated by sports.

Arrow Smith was just a little part of that city. They weren't nothing. They were just five dirty white dudes playing fucking in the song, you know, and playing in different bars around Providence. Yeah, so you're saying if, like, They were from like Milwaukee, they'd be like the biggest thing ever. Like, just to pick Milwaukee out of the... Well, Milwaukee at the time had the motherfucking bucks and shit.

And the Brewers, well, I know what you're saying. I know what you're saying. But just something about Boston. Boston had all four sports league. Right. It's really rough to give a fuck. Plus, Boston College, you know, all those Boston schools up there. They have a lot of sports up there.

For them to even give a fuck a little bit about music. and for this little band to reach out nationwide with nothing. Crazy. You know, they put bands on Midnight Special those days. And Don Carson's rock concert. It's not like they came on the Tonight Show. No, never. There was no Jimmy Kimmel.

There was no band. There was none of that shit. On Carson. Nothing like that, Lee. So you really had to dig deep for information. Wow, that's crazy. There was no Jimmy Kimmel. and nobody was there before Jimmy Kimmel putting bands on at night

nobody yeah so how much of a band's album sales were just people trying to figure out if they liked them well you know you just hear him at a party like somebody put the record on you'd be like who is that? Who the fuck is that? Yeah and they go oh man I just got this

is the new such and such you know and you're like oh god I gotta get that now that's a good point you brought up Lee about the how many people bought music 50-50 shot. Lee, let me ask you a question. Okay. If you're walking in the store and you see this album cover,

the deaf leopard high and dry, it's a bunch of guys looking up and then in the middle, a forced picture in there with a guy about to jump in the pool hanging upside down pretty much and the pool has water in it. That intrigues your mind.

Okay, that's 1981. Look at the album cover behind Dean Delray. look at that fucking album cover. I would give you $4.99 just for that. Just for the saint and artwork. Look at Led Zeppelin's two artwork. Look what that looks like 50 years later.

Yeah. So do you understand me the effort that was put in to an album, why the music industry has fallen to shit? Because you just made a great point. If I walked into a store and I was about to buy, Led Zeppelin, too, because my brother, had it but I saw this yeah who's deaf leopard dog I saw them open up for junior priests last year they fucking killed it that album cover looks fucking cool

look at that house it looks like the valley yeah shit I'm gonna buy that for 499 yeah Lee you're right record sales did look at these covers Lee how can you walk past this cover and Sabbath bloody Sabbath if you turn it around yeah it's it's right there the front is the devil getting him. That's you tonight, Lee. Look at... Yeah, yeah, pretty much.

Let me see what I go. Devil's got you, Ali. The devil has it. If you look at that album cover, if you look at that album cover, what's really unique about that album cover, is the front is the devil already at the house. But if you look at the back,

the devil gone, and you're in the bed and, like, people are talking to you. Like, bro, you were in deep, motherfucker. With the 6666 out front, but if you turn it around, you'll see that it's a guy and his family's around him. Yeah. And they're like, put towels on his head and they're like, dog, you were deep last night. Don't do this again. You had a scared steward.

You smoked that Sativa. You smoked that Joey Deer Sativa. Oh, my God. I got some fucking great albums this week. Like I said, uh, your boy gave you this album here. Yeah, that's great. Lamb of God, which a fucking great album. I didn't know. Willie Nelson,

City of New Orleans, the Essential Johnny Cash, and Southside Johnny with La Bomba's big band. You like this stuff, Dene? I don't know this. I know him, but I mean, I don't know this record. It's the songs by your boy there. Of Tom.

Oh, Tom Waits. Wow. I haven't heard of this. There you go. There you go, see. Wow. Oh, this is cool. Listen to it. Let me know what you think.

All right, thanks. That's from Dante Gazzini, the man of motherfucking steel. This is cool. He also sent me a CD. I almost crashed my fucking car. Listen to it. I don't know what the fuck he's got. He's got noises and people running around.

What's up, Leah? What are you feeling, dog? Talk to me. It's actually starting to calm down, which is nice. It's calming down. It's just playing. No, no, no. It's not calming down.

Okay, it's not. It's not. It's playing games. It's a dragon. It comes and goes. Okay, well, right now it's calmer. It comes and goes. We'll do another drop in a second, straight out.

Yeah, a little drop. That's a time when Dean and Mr. Basio came on, and I held my puke until the end of the pod. No, we can't double. Where are your T-shirts? Do you leave some T-shirts? They're in the trunk. That was awesome.

Now, do you feel the edibles? I could feel the demon, the hit of weed I took. That weed was so strongly. imagine me I took a hit dog I didn't know what happened to you oh man I was you're still stone

yeah totally but now it's just normal normal stuff you started staring you didn't say nothing you hadn't be scared for a minute I couldn't even see at all it was just like I was just like

complete paralyzed the right side of my body wow and then I just started sweating it was like I got bit by a spider for real like all of a sudden And I was like, I can't move my right side.

I saw you losing it because I saw you, like, looking at the water bottle. Yeah. Two minutes later, he went. Yeah. I just saw the whole process. Like, I'm going to get that water bottle. I'm going to get that water bottle. Yeah, right.

I was like trying to reach it, but my arm wouldn't move. It was like a full-blown snake bite or a spider bite. I wanted to see where this drop was going to take us to that. Yeah, it's pretty good. I like it now. do it's to Wednesday. We're going to put three drops. What are you talking about?

I'm going to do an all-night podcast from nine to three and have different people pop in. Isn't that what we're doing now? No, not really. This was just a warm-up to Wednesday. This was just like spring training. This is as deep as I've ever been and I've ever want to go. No, no, no, no. This is nothing.

I'm going to take over every sense with the SID. Every time I come on, you guys go next level. We're going to put three drops. in each one. I got some sit in the tub right now. Yeah? Where'd you get it? Don't worry about it. No, I mean, yeah, I mean, but that's so cool. And I've been

baking the process and I gave Lee the light ones tonight. But Wednesday, we went through the old ones. I'm sick on Wednesday. I can already tell him. Thursday. No worries. We'll wait until you get back. Oh, shit. We'll do three drops, nine o'clock.

Whoever pops up, I'm going to invite some people. Three drops, nine o'clock. That's it. Tip top dick Yeah It's like smoking dope on periscope with Uncle Joey That's it that's a new show on Periscope Three drops

Tick Top We're gonna go deeply Lee this is it This is This is gonna break my fucking Concentrate This is gonna get my Creative state back I really enjoy See my issue with acid

Is just the buildup I freaks me out It scares the shit out of me Because Of everything I guess that like acid is supposed to do to you. And then you fuck with me a little bit. And you know my brain just works like a fucking hamster wheel.

And once you put just like a little bit of like doubt that I'm going to start going crazy, he calls me like six of him and be like, oh, it ate through another Tupperware today. Oh, I can see lights when I close my eyes. So that's, yeah, we're good. We're good. This is going to be a fun one. But yeah, you just start and it just caused a lot of anxiety. but I'm how like I really like this is what I like about acid

let's like turn the lights off and leave you and hit by yourself and give you another drop and shit it's like after after like the buildup when the buildup is over it's great it's just like life Lee there's no buildup if you buy in do you see Lee do you see like when you're excited about a movie yeah oh yeah you come home and you go boy that suck what made me go to that fucking movie well the height right it's the same bullshit I do to you with the ass. Ain't nothing going to happen to you.

Ain't nothing going to happen to you. You know, I'm sick and fucking tired of this New America with their fear and there, you know. There's an age gap that just is scared of everything in this country. Yeah. They got to go home and read a label. It's kind of scary, to be honest. Nothing of it is.

The only fear is the fear that you put in your fucking mind. I used to do this shit. after I started doing this shit heavy six months after I found my mother dead on the floor oh my God think of the visuals I would get at night with this shit wow so the feelings think of the shit that would go through my head with this shit but guess what this little drug helped me cope with that tragedy in a weird fucking way you know what I kept eating it I started selling it yeah and I would sell 200 hits a fucking week wow but I'd eat two or three a night.

How much is it ahead back then? Yeah, I would pay 90 cents for it. That's home for $3. Oh, my God. Two-tena-profit. Two-tena-profit. I want to see that documentary, I think, comes out next week, Mr. Sunshine, about the two dudes that made the orange sunshine.

Really? Yeah, the acid. Double-barrel orange sunshine. Yeah, the original orange sunshine. That's the name of an acid? Yeah. So what does that mean when you would name an acid? What does that do?

It's a different feeling. So is it just, is it marketing or is it that you would? It's market. Okay. So they would have like, like that was liquid sit, right? But you don't know what the name of it is. It's all the same. Yeah.

You know, when you buy it on a piece of paper, or it comes like this. Like, if you came to my house tomorrow and said, I want to buy a hundred, it's, I give you a piece of paper. Okay. With, what's that called? Perforation. Perforations.

Yeah. And once you counted all of them, like they would be, like, so they would be five across and 20 down. That would be a hundred hits. And you'd have to take them all, either break them, put them into a piece of paper, but that would stick. And you would double up and give away hits,

or you'd put them in aluminum four. So you'd go out with aluminum four, a little baggy, and you'd just sell aluminum four. I put mescal in there, the little hits, the microdod acid. Yeah, yeah. But you had your microdots, you had your orange sunshine,

you had your double barrel sunshine, your full-way acid. You had the window. pain double window pain double window pain you had so many different types of acid what are we on tonight that's what we're on tonight yeah what color did you see up there when you looked and it hit you it was a bat that's what i saw a bat yeah he's been you've been teasing me for 10 years about bat and rats in the trees and i saw something flying that's killer That's perfect.

That's how you know it's a good one because it's a closed door. I'm telling you, this shit was the best. You know why? Because I used to go home afterward and the shit you think about the shit that goes through your mind. It really is amazing. I understand how the government did testing on people with this and shit. There's been thousands of different experiments with this shit. You're just continuing all that testing.

Yeah, but I tested it on myself. I'm some fucking puke that gives it to some fucking guy that's in jail for, finales a hit and watches him scratch his head for six fucking hours. No, no, no, no. But I could see the effects and the benefits of it. Yeah. I'm telling you, at that age, it pushed my mind a little bit and maybe be a little bit more fucking out, not outgoing, but. Understanding?

Understanding? Like, I used to see some dark shit at night guys. Yeah. Ooh. Yeah. Yeah, man. They're saying that, you know, they're doing those low doses of, uh, psilocybin, you know, that's curing depression and all kinds of stuff.

That's cool. You know? Like, each day taking a mushroom cap, like in a tablet form, and then being better. And you just build your tolerance after a week. For four days you'll trip a little bit, have diarrhea. Yeah. And after that, you'll be tip-top, tomm-a-goo. You know what I'm saying?

Nobody's stopping you. You're balance. You're giggling. You're happy. Yeah. I see it. I really see it. I see this kind of therapy in a lot of fucking way.

And I lived it. It's not like I read about this. I lived it. Let's fucking look at the facts. Okay, I was a wounded deer. But. What? I was a wounded deer.

I mean, I was damaged goods. Why are you damaged goods? Because I lost my fucking parent. It affected me. I was sidewaysly. I was damaged goods. At that point, anybody could come take me. Isis.

I could have joined Joins Town. I could have joined the cult. I could have joined the gang. I could have been persuaded because I was exactly how they want you. Jones Town. I was exactly how they want you. I worked myself back to being straight again and being knowledgeable. And yeah, I lost it with the thievery and the criminality and all that shit.

It wasn't who I really was. But what got me straight in a lot of those senses was the thinking I'd do when I'd be high on that. of what my future was or what I want as stupid and as dumb as it sounds you knew it you could ask us yeah yeah you did it and you said do something the last two hours oh yeah what everybody else goes home it's you and your mind yeah in a dark room and sometimes you have weed sometimes you have beer but the result is the same the the thought keeps coming up over and over and over yeah and it forces you to break shit down what am i going to do in this situation and it would force it down for me.

You know, I'm not embarrassed to say this shit. I had a situation where my mother had just died. There was a wounded deer over it. I knew I was about to get thrown out of this house. On top of all this, I was in love with this broad. And bro, she just didn't fucking want to even get the first base with me. Oh, man. So whatever her and I would have an argument about something, I would put Black Sabbath.

Yeah. sabotage on it. And I take a head of acid and turn the lights off and I'd listen to both sides and after that, I'd have the answer to all my problems. How crazy is that?

Yeah, right? Let's Tony Bentley. Give you a breather there. Yeah. Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. I want to be around to pick up the pieces when somebody breaks

your... Some somebody twice as smart as I'm a somebody who will swear to be true as you used to do with me who'll leave you to learn that misery loves company sing it Lee Sitting there like a fucking dooze and bot. Sing a league. I mean, I want to be around. Hit it. It's Monday, bitches.

You see how he does it when he breaks your heart to bits. Okay. Let's see if a puzzle fits so fine. And that's when I'll discover that. Revenge is sweet As I sit there applauding from a front row seat

When somebody breaks your heart Like you How's everybody settled now again? Yeah, it'll be all right, everybody's straight Lee, Lee, no more noises I'm getting fucking I make no promises You what?

I can make no promises on the noises front What's going on, Dean Delray? Another man I told somebody the other day, somebody called me talking some shit about how things weren't working out from. I said, do me a favor. Do you follow Dean Delray? He goes, no, I don't. I go, follow Dean Delray.

That's how you should be working. If you're not doing what Dean Delray is doing to the tea, don't call me when you're doing that 90 days straight. Then come see me. That's cool. I can't divulge you. I said that to. Yeah. I think he went into shock when I said that to him.

I go, look at his tweets, look what he tweets, look at his podcast, look at his consistency. He talks about every show he's going to do, whether three people show up or one show. He don't give a fuck. He's relentless. I don't know if that comes to the age because the person who called me is like 30. Yeah. You know, I don't know if it's an experience thing that you know that it's over and over and over again type of thing, and you're out there working and something cracks eventually. It's better than sitting on the couch.

Totally. But it's really great to see what you do. man I'm really proud of you. Yeah man, thank you dude. You're not sitting there looking for handouts. You're always hustling, you're always putting shows together. You know, there's people that think, oh, well, I'm gonna, you know, I'm just gonna wait till somebody takes me on the road and that's it. You either go on the road by yourself, you'll take a hundred dollar flight.

You'll sit under the plane, go to New York, sleep on a floor to do spots at the stand, which to me is just, you know, you do four spots a night. I love it, you even told me, you go, I'm looking for spots. They give me spots every night. I can't be mad at you for something like that. Yeah. It's the fucking, this whole game, whether it's music. Did you have the same work ethic for music? I did, man.

What's great about this is if you have work ethic or a drive and a couple don't in a band, then you got an extra load on your shoulders. But with just comedy, it's just full on me, you know? So I don't have to worry about anything. Like, I don't have to ask anybody if I need to go out and work or what, you know, like band member wise. You just know that it's an everyday fucking thing. You had the same work ethic for music all those years? Yep, absolutely.

Sometimes I'd have the wind knocked out of me a little bit, you know, and be like, damn. But then something would happen, and I'd be just slugger and through, you know? Do you get the wind knocked out of it in comedy from time to time? Yeah, yeah, man. it's so much work you know because it's like you you could be doing

you know doing shows shows and then all of a sudden weeks no shows like what is going on here you know as far as road you know it's so weird how you know you do comedy 25 years you still get kicked on the fucking stomach

you know I just got turned down by too high level management themes. Was I depressed? I mean, I wasn't happy about having to pay somebody extra money unless they were that good. They were going to bring me that much extra film work or TV work, which I really didn't want to do, you know, like I was thinking about it. Yeah. So when they told me no, like the people who called me like, bro, are you sitting down? This is going to really depression. I'm like, no, I'm not depressed at all. Yeah. That means nobody's going to take my money and I still control the fucking kingdom, you know. I didn't know how they were

going to come at me or whatever. whatever or what type of but to be honestly at this point of the game I really don't want that so I in a way I was like kind of happy like relieved like if I go with them I'm gonna have to have do certain amount of weeks on the road to do this because that's what all our other clients are doing and I really don't want to do that man yeah I think I've been tailing off the road a little bit like I've been telling them no no no I don't want to do a lot of shit I'm pretty much home the whole month of April wow really okay yeah I'm doing April 20 at the Oxnard, 420.

Oh, yeah. And fucking Oxnard, beside that. I'm not really doing much in April. I got theaters in May and Utah or something crazy. And I got like Kansas City or something like that in June or July. That's it. I don't have a lot of work. I'm like you guys.

I'm in the same boat as you, motherfuckers. I want to be a dad. Yeah. I want to be a dad and I'll do the podcast with my brother here and have a great time and do drugs and run up and down. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It makes no difference to me, but I don't want to be in fucking D.C. or anywhere else from fucking Wednesday the Sunday night. I don't want to do that, man.

Yeah. Not at this point in my life. I get it. I like it how it is. I like it. I don't need to go out there and kill myself. I'm not trying to prove anything. I'm not that guy, man.

Yeah. I'm very happy with what's going on right now. So it's really weird how you get the wind knocked out of you, but you need that. And at the end, when you think about it, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're You know what? Yeah. Did I even really want that? What would I do with that?

You know, sometimes it's better to want than to have, you know, so. Yeah. What's up, Doug? You're seeing things? I see you looking around like fucking Kennedy got shot. What's the matter? I'm okay. I'm okay.

I'm just, yeah, I'm really deep. How deep? It's just really speedy right now. That's all. You want to take a walk around the block away for you? Yeah. No, it's okay. You're sure?

Yeah. I'll be allowed. I'll be like Owen Benjamin. and I'll be a cross-country skiing. I don't know where he. Like, he's, like, I don't know where he is now. Like, I follow him on Instagram. He's cross-country skiing.

There's snow around him. He moved. He moved. Yeah, he moved. He moved. To, like, upstate New York or something, right? Yeah, he went on. Oh, good for him.

He had a baby, bro. Yeah. And he saw this for what it was, and he goes, I don't want to stay here. If they want to hire me, let them call me. I'll fly and take a plane. Yeah. Yeah. That's what it's become.

I think he does his podcast up there by himself. Yeah. That's it. I can't be madden. You can't be madden. Not everybody wants to live in Los Angeles. Nobody wants to raise a child here. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. I'm on the fence, though. I'm still on the fucking fence. Yeah. The only reason why I wouldn't leave is because I don't want to move. I know how much more fucking pain the ass of this. Especially if I got to move across fucking country with cats and wine. some babies and fucking

it's not the same as just moving across the street like no really I feel like if you already packed up to do it no idea when you land at your destination and your furniture is not there for another week and you have to live in a house and no furniture for another week then it gets there they try to ransom your furniture

yeah it was an extra thousand dollars per mile so now you're all nine thousand dollars you have three days to come up or you can't get you have no fucking idea what are we going to do with the cats and the kid we're going to put them all in the same fucking vehicle and stop every hour on the hour so the

cats could get there because they're going to be meowing that back there. You want to shoot yourself. It's a 20 hour fucking ride where we got to go with a child. That means you've got to stop and sleep and take all those animals out and guard the fucking truck with all the furniture in there. Yeah. You

have no idea when you've got to get up in the middle of the night or bring a friend with a trailer so he could sleep outside, close to your fucking furniture. You have no idea, Lisa, I had. No, thank you. No thank you is fucking correct.

Yes, yes. What shows have you seen lately? That's been sensational. That's come to mind the last six months. Shit, man. I know you saw Sabbath. I mean, you go a lot. Yeah, that temple of the dog was the one.

Oh, it was insane at the... Forum, man. I still can't believe how great that was. It just blows me away, man. It was just to hear those songs. And then they were doing some of the Lovebone songs also. So it was just like, oh, my God. Couldn't believe it.

Cornell sounded amazing, you know. Now talk to me about the forum. Yep. So a New York company was, the people run Massachusetts Guard. Yep. And I heard day one in that and just it looks and sounds. It's insane. What they did was they, they, there used to be this amazing video of it too that,

LA Times put together what was a speed shot of them working for like a year and a half or whatever, but they dug down. So the thing kind of goes like this gradually, you know. every seat you're not in anybody's sight lines you know just kind of slowly graduates up then they built all they they had some guy come in and shoot lasers or whatever and put the speakers all over in the perfect spots it's insane man and then all the seats made only for music now no sports at all so it's just an incredible like that's why everybody's going down yeah and it's i mean it's i mean It's fucking great.

I mean, Eric Clapton's going to be there. Yeah. Yeah. It's incredible, dude. How fucking old is Eric Clapton? 70. Yeah, I think he's 72. Look that up, Lee.

I think he's 72. He says this is it. Yeah. God fucking bless him, man. Yeah. 72. Still alive. Music, looks good.

He looks great. And heroin for all those years. It's a dirty fucking junkie. it gives me hope yeah man that guy he killed all those guys are alive man

you know like 45 no he ain't no yeah he ain't no fucking 40 no no no he was born 1945 March 30 so it's 55 and 17 is what

72 yeah 72 72 yeah 72 years old yeah you know, like five years ago. He's going through changes, Doug. Yeah, yeah. This is changes.

What's happening to? This is changes. To the audience. It's the same stuff. It's just really... You want another edible? No. Oh, yeah, yeah.

What we got left? I don't know. Do you have any stars left? No. I don't think so. I'm okay. I'm okay. I'm sweating it out as this is...

I dare you to smoke some of that weed. No, there's no more left. Oh, there's now? No, and the fucked up thing is I gotta go first thing tomorrow. I got to go drop my car off. Guys, I woke up this morning. I had a flat fucking tire. Oh, no.

Okay, no big deal, Joey. What the fuck's the big deal? I was raining here like a motherfucker this morning. Traffic was out the fucking gazoo. I said, fuck it. Let me take it to Just Tires. I take it over to my man over to Just Tires. I go, I'm going to go get some coffee with my wife.

Call me. Call me back goes, yeah, you need a front tie. $260-something. I go, why 260 something out? He goes, well, I've got to replace both front ones. I go, listen, I got to bring back the car in two months. Yeah. He goes, what about

one tie? I go, right, what's the one tire? 168? Yeah. I go, I don't want to pay 168 for fucking two months. Yeah. So I called the Subaru guy and he goes, bring the fucking car down. I'll take it back. Yeah. I don't want to bring, I don't have four hours to deal with that shit this week. I got to do

promo. The fucking CD gets released on Friday for the special I shot. So I gotta do all this fucking promo. I don't have a four-hour window to go down there, pick a car drive around the corner, do the credit app, do all that shit sit, get the car explained to you. Then I'm starving. I got to take the wife to eat somewhere. It's a fucking nightmare.

Maybe next week I can do it. So I went to this Armenian dude, and he said, come by in the morning. We'll see if we can plug it up. If not, I'll get your tire from the back and we'll hook it up. Yeah. I'll know my day tomorrow after I fuck it. Did you drive over it or something? What do you think happened?

I don't fucking know. I was gone all weekend. I came home yesterday. I drove. I went to Perennial. I went to my buddies. I made a stop here. But everything was local.

I didn't go nowhere. Once I got off the fucking plane, I just ran two errands. I went to the week. I went to the street with this in the line. So somewhere along that fucking line, I got to nail on my goddamn time. Which, who gives a fuck?

It's got to do with the price size. We still got to take forward. But that's what you wake up. on a Monday. Yeah. It kind of sucks. And I kept thinking, let me just put the bicycle tire

on that motherfucker. I didn't want to get rained on for a bicycle tire. So that thing's a nightmare too. Now I've got to change the thing twice. Why waste energy? Let me just banging out the one time. I keep putting air and there and praying.

So it's at half mass right now. Yeah, but that's the work ethic you have. I could see that your work, and I always go. I always look at it. Lee and I sit here, night after night having conversations about different podcasts.

What makes different podcasts work? What doesn't make it work? And you're a great example of who is supposedly. You put it up. You tweet it. You tweet it again. You tweet it again. You put a clip up.

That's what you need to do in today's fucking economy, man, to make a splash. A big guess. You're not annoying about it. You had Bill Paxton last week. Yeah. I don't know how the fuck you scored that savage. That was awesome. As crazy as it might sound, you have guests that are actually about the topic

that you're talking about. It's amazing how, like, especially in these, like, you, like, could be bringing on a lot of comedians who might not have, like, if you brought me on the show, I'd be a waste on the show. Yeah. Because I don't know anything about music, but you bring people who actually have interesting music things to talk about, and it's just great. Man, I had Joe Travers on today, and he's the guy who's in charge of the entire Zappa music collection. It's all on tape and, you know, the tape can rot away and everything. So he's in

charge every day, full-time job of baking the tapes, keeping them conditioned, balancing them on to another piece of tape. All this, it's like a nonstop. So he has a, he has all the master recording. Yep, all the masters and he's constantly working with him because they reissue all kinds of records and stuff all the time. And, uh, He's in charge. He's called the Vault Meister. It's cool. And he said there's over a thousand tapes.

So imagine, like, that's just a full-time job. Isn't that cool? Do you feel like you missed your calling? Who, me? Yeah. No. No way, man. I don't want to be the Vault Meister.

I mean, what an interesting job. Isn't somebody doing something, aren't they doing something with Prince's music? I heard it's going back on iTunes next week You know? What is? His music. It's been off since he passed. So all his music was taken off iTunes?

It was on for a while and then he took it off. And then it was on again and then he passed away and it was gone again. So I heard it's coming back next week. He was one of the last holdouts, I think. Remember like the Beatles and him? Like five years? I think there's a couple. people holding it.

Yeah. Even ACDC for a while was holding it. Yeah, I can't find a lot of shit on there. Sometimes I ask my wife, I get back home, she's like, it wasn't on there. Yeah. I look three times, I went on the other way and I can't from. I'm like, that's fucking weird. That that whole,

speaking of the way, still. And then I'm driving somewhere with my wife. We got a babysitter. We're going to go to dinner. I'm fucking driving and I. Stay where they happen comes on. You know? Yeah. And guys that are our age, no, you know, stay where the heaven came on,

or something from the neighborhood died. Yeah. You put Led Zeppelin 2 and they, I said Led Zeppelin 4 in there. And something about that song. You know, it's just something about that song that even, like I was right there is when it came to me. I go, Led Zeppelin was never going to lose that court case. Yeah. It was never going to happen.

They took the two dudes back to the room and said, listen. This music has become a part against society. Yeah. Let's pretend. They stole the chords. What you did? Yeah. What you motherfuckers did, you too nasty motherfuckers and shit.

What you did? I can't get mad at them. Did you listen to your version? Yeah. It makes you want to shoot yourself. It makes you want to shoot yourself. I'm sure. People say that about my jokes.

Maybe like, hey, man, maybe somebody can do that joke better. But, yeah. It's such a part of American society that at this point, it would be so destructive to go for that song to have an asterisk nest to it. Like, to go out like Pete Rose. Yeah. Like, you know what I'm saying? Like, it would just be too much for that song to go out like Pete Rose.

And right there it came from, I go, this song could never, ever get a song. You know, and I know that there's YouTube videos. Yeah. I mean, there's facts. Those songs are facts. but listen to those songs. They weren't going nowhere. Three black dudes yelling about something.

I don't know what the one song that you listen to. They're yelling about something. Zepley took it and fucking cleaned it up. I'm sorry, guys. His $50 is a bottle of wine. Do what you need to do. All right. It's over.

It's ours. Oh, my God. It's crazy what they did, Ledeple. But they took everything to a different fucking level, man. Oh, man. And you hate to say all this shit. As a comedian and whatever the fuck we do, You know, you don't want somebody pilgrimage in your jokes or whatever,

but this is a different type of pilgrimage. They said, listen, we're going to take this and make this 20 times better than it was. And we're not going to give you a dime for it. We're just going to show you up where you fucked up. You know, stay away to heaven solo till this fucking day. Oh, man, it's the top. It's Jimmy Page's soul. It's just some solos that you listen to and you know who's fucking around.

Who's doing it for the girls? You know what solo has always killed me? Angus on touch too much at the end. Oh. And the one we talked about, overdose. That's one of my favorite guitar pieces by him. But he just gets down and dirty. You can feel it.

On the end there, he's just going for when Bonds just keeps going, Oh, you're my dose. You know? And Angus is just killing it. How are you doing Lee, Don? I'm making through, we'll see. You're as tough as fucking nails, Lee. Let me give some shout-outs here real quick.

Andrew Rogers, I love you. Peter Manderber. Jeffrey Collins, always on point. Live like Jay. Barely legal. Michael Ziegler. Donovan Sickler. Alexander Gonzalez.

And my main man, the king of slinging dick Kern Michael You know I love you Motherfuggers Don't forget Valentine's Day I'm at flappers

And don't forget The 23rd to the 25th I'm at the House of Comedy in Minneapolis motherfuckers How you like me now And shit I'm gonna go up there

Freeze my ass off From Minneapolis But I don't give a fuck Who wants to go to these towns In the summer You want to go in It's this natural fucking habitat You understand me

Lee Stop breathing Every I'm gonna send you home To put your pajamas on Okay I have pajamas on and wings. Who doesn't like pajamas? For the silver bottle.

You probably has slippers now. I don't like slippers. So you just sat there with those two hoops, just hanging out there. Marinating. I love that. Yeah. It's marinating, those Jew hoops. You can't get too hot.

Bro, he's got an Auschwitz toe. It's a toe that's as hard as fucking stone. He ever tops you with it, you're going down. It's like a steel boot. A steel boot. He kicked me one time in Jiu-Jitsu. My leg was swollen for three weeks. Oh, my God.

A little Auschwitz, though. It got burnt. Oh. It's nice and fucking hard and shit. Lee's ride that asses. Yep. He's going deep into the murky waters. Yeah.

How's it treating, yeah, Lee? I'm okay. I feel like this isn't another down period. You hungry? No. Oh, good enough. Oh, well, what? It plays with you, Lee.

This ass is going to play with you all night. You can see a canister of weed over there? Yeah. When I leave, I'm put that in the middle of the table. When I come back to my mom. better be empty because that's going to be your answer right there that's how if you smoke that with the savage tonight your business ideas are going to come to you that life's ideas are going to come to you you know all the answers to your questions i'm going to leave you an album in there

i'll leave you a nice album to meditate that what do you think we should leave like johnny cash or something the essential johnny care and you're straight we just said sure that was awesome how many times trip growing up, brother. Well, you know, I liked mushrooms way better. I was the opposite. I took acid like four times. Once was at a concert and that was like,

whoa. You know what I mean? Like way too strong. I remember it felt like the stadium was breathing like this. And I was just like, oh, I better go ride this out. It was like Motley Crew White Snake.

Yeah. It's funny when you connect the breathing with the wall. You know, that's happened to me with anything, with a TV, with a picture, a mirror. Oh, my God. Yeah, my computer screens freaking me out right now. Oh, my God. If you trip in front of a mirror, that's like torture. Yeah, right.

Especially when you catch yourself tripping. Yeah. And you see yourself in the mirror tripping like the devil's advocate. Lee, stop rubbing your head. Stop looking at the mirror. Shut the computer, don't like. I'm not looking in the mirror. I'm just sweating.

This one refuses me. Look at you, me. This shit hasn't even hit me. That's how, hey, that's how I felt an hour ago on that weed. Oh, my God. He's on the weed. And you know what? I put two drops in this on each of it.

Oh, you motherfucker. Yeah, because I put one at the house. I knew this wasn't just one thing. You know, me, dog. We go deep from all angles. I got time to fuck around with you. Joey went two times on him. Joey, two times.

Yep, yep, Joey two drops. Oh, my God. I'm bringing my own sugar cubes next time. You're what? He's bringing his own sugar games. I got a box of those things, Lee. I have a box of sugar cubes. My wife found them the other day.

She's like, what the fuck of these? Yeah. Then I show the sit of debt. Yeah, the sit of death. Fuck, what is wrong with you? She just walked out of the room. She said that. That's hilarious.

It didn't hit you, huh? I feel something. but not, I feel the edibles, I think. Right. I feel something. I'm immune to this shit. Oh my God. I'm immune to this shit.

It's been, it's sad. Yeah. It's very sad. It's very sad to know that I'm kind of immune to this shit. That's crazy, right? Like, it's not that it doesn't affect me. It's, I won't even let it affect me. Oh, yeah.

Like, I've done it so much. I can control the whole thing through breathing, It is crazy. If you taught me any of these breathing techniques or any of these tips. That's aware. Number one, you've got to clear your mind. Every time, listen, man,

I think about this shit all the time. I write about it, you know, because I'm interested in human behavior. My biggest acid years and mesquering years and all those giggly years was from 80 to about 83 where I giggled every week

and I had to oh I would die yeah you know and the last hour of the trip was me alone coming down

thinking about what was going on in my life breaking it down you know trying to put everything in place but

those six or seven you know tell it Lee yeah you met with your friends at six oh yeah you ate him at 615

with beer yeah by 830 you're on fire oh absolutely and you're bump into people, Lee. Like, Lee, this is a different experience.

I would head straight to the woods. So what time is it now in that timeline? We took it at 7.30, right? Right. We took it at 7 o'clock, right? Oh, fuck. At 10 o'clock, you'll be on fire if everything goes well. What time is it now?

An hour. You got an hour to get to the hospital. Oh, I can't see that at all. Fuck. Go to the hospital and Tom. I did ask it two hours ago. Give me the fucking detonator. What's it?

Something they give you? Yeah. Like, when you get stuck by a snake, what do they give you? The anti-venom. Anti-venom. Yeah, tell them to give you the anti-venom. I don't you go to the hospital, do I? No, no. We're just teasing you. If you want to, you got an hour to go over there and tell them to give you some shark call.

I don't want to go to the hospital. And they'll take your name and number. They'll give you a picture of the FBI. Don't stick a telescope up your ass and see what else you got up there. That's already there now with all this happening. So I just want you to know before you go to the hospital. Okay. I'll look for warrants.

They'll see if you're a child molester. I'm not. You're going there with that green t-shirt on. You never know. I'm saying. Hell yeah, me. Yeah, I shouldn't have gotten Dean high until that. That was a mistake.

I didn't know. No, it's fun. It's good. No, I didn't know it was going to flatten Dean. I really didn't. I thought your tolerance was a little high. Oh, no. I could see you wanted to play with five when you walked in here.

You were snooping around. Look like containers and shit. Looking at pipes. I knew you had something in your mind. I didn't even offer it to you. I'm like, if you don't get eye, you don't get eye. I don't want to give a fucker. People think, like,

It was great. I don't like you. No. Listen, man, the best part about people who don't get high is when they do take a hit. Yeah. They go deep and it's enjoyable for them. Totally. They go eat after this.

Like, you're going to leave here. Yep. And you're stopping somewhere. When you eat sugar tonight? No. No, no. Still, you're off it? Oh, yeah.

Nine months now. How many pounds? 36. No sugar. Yeah, none. What's for breakfast again? I will. wake up I have either

steel cut oatmeal or I do a protein shake and a piece of toast with almond butter and some fruit Lee would die if you had to eat almond butter

yeah that doesn't sound like that a piece of toast and fruit I was trying to figure out what kind of fruit to eat strawberries and and blueberries that sounds nice no meat at all oh well I have meat at lunch What do you have for lunch?

Then lunch I'll usually do like, you know, like let's say either eggs, you know, like for lunch, like an omelet or some quinoa and shit like that, black beans, chicken. We ever got original Joe's doing all the quinoa around? No, not there. When I'm there, I was just there with Russell Peters. And what did you eat that day? I ate the, I got coffee. green beans and the hamburger steak. The hamburger steak is delicious.

Oh, man, I love it. You don't eat bread. No bread. Zecchio bread. Remember, I can eat that. Zecchio bread. Lee, you're taking notes. I want you into Zecchio diet.

In two weeks, you'll fucking be ripped to shreds, Lee. If I came in here with Ezekiel bread, you'd throw me and the Ezekiel bread off the dog. Let me ask you something. Can he eat chicken wings on this diet? He can, but not the bretted ones. What about the ones with Franks' outsource? Yeah. You can eat those?

There are no sugar in that, Frank's hot toast? It's a little bit. It's not like ketchup or something, you know. So you don't eat ketchup. I don't. I go mustard. Mustard has no sugar. No, I love mustard.

I love mustard. I love it. I like the yellow mustard on the hamburger. Good, googly-mugly. Dude, I wish I had it now. With no bun. No bun. A little mustard on it.

You fucking put it in. A lot of people use mustard and sauces. Yeah. Like the base, it would be a mustard, whatever, and it's fucking delicious. I don't know it was. I don't know anything about being a chef. I'm just a fat fuck. I love it.

You know, a lot of people ask me if I know nothing. I don't know nothing. I don't know nothing. I don't know nothing. Yeah. If I got a pound chicken, I'd rather get raped. If I got a pound like a chicken cutler and see what the chicken really looks like, with the paws and shit, I rather get raped.

I don't want to see nothing, all right? I don't want to see no fucking animals in this primitive form. I want to see it in the last condition. That's the, I want to see the head, I don't see the eyes. I don't want to see what it looks like raw. I don't know. Do I want to fucking see it? Nothing.

Yeah. Give it to me well done or medium rare butterfly that motherfucker. And put some sour cream mashed potatoes and let me go to work here. Yeah. Hell yeah. A chopped salad. Yeah. Look at Lee.

He's floating now. It's all over. Lee, need one more drop. No, thank you. You want to smoke a bowl? Sure. Because I'll put a drop in the bowl to really send this. Oh, shit.

Last week, tell him what we smoked. We smoked the mushroom last week in the bun. Oh, you smoked? I'm not sure? Fuck, yeah. You grind it up like, tremendous. He saw the devil. Yeah.

Look at him. He's freaking out. How was that, me? Look at him. He's sweating from his stomach. I'm just sweating a lot. Why you're sweating? Lee, you're working yourself up into nothing.

I'm not working myself up. Yes, you're just wet, dude, coming out of me. No, no, but I see you're working yourself up. Stop working yourself up, all right? Nothing's going to happen. You're family. I feel fine. You're panicking.

You're making noises. You're thinking about what's Paula going to say. You're 28 years old. You're the Captain Kirk of the Enterprise. Enterprise. You understand me? You don't have to go see dog movies. Dog movies. That's hilarious. I like that dog movies. That's when I was really tripping when he was talking about that.

And he said, what the fuck? And I couldn't even comment. I used to go to, I think I've been to Bonny's Beery twice and both times I got sick. Yeah. You go to that? I used to go to that Hollywood one right there. It's a drinking spot. Yeah, it's a rocker. That's why I went. Yeah, they got pool tables. Great. But I didn't really eat there, you know. I mean.

I went there for managers meeting once or something. Yeah. A bunch of people met. And then I went in there to meet people after like a comedy store spot for a football game. I went in there. There was some crazy people. Yeah. And that was it, really.

And then I went to this one to watch a UFC fight. Oh, yeah. I went up to Bach and Clappers. I went in there with my fan, my wife. Oh, yeah. Excuse me? That's the one I went to Yeah I went over there

But missed a turkey club over you Unbelievable A turkey club Turkey club Oh Yeah Turkey club That's hilarious

I don't want a burger No I want to go eat One of these next shows I gotta get out of the house And I gotta make a change Yeah let's do it You know Paul Mooney always said If you want to write good material

got to be entertained. To really write, you got to be always entertained, you know, and it makes sense. I try to entertain myself with various different fucking ways and torturing people, but it's not enough entertainment. This isn't enough anymore? Huh? This isn't enough anymore? This isn't entertainment for me.

Lee, you would have lived your whole life without eating an edible. You would have never thought of eating an edible. Probably, yeah. You would have never thought of. smoking. You would have smoked twice more in your life. You would have been staying at home every night in Boston. At the movie theater, you would have probably had a different job by now.

You would have gone to visit mom three nights a week and get a free meal, I know you. You would have drove the hour. Think of how your horizons have changed. It's crazy. It's a mate. You got a girlfriend. You do some acid. You do some mushrooms.

Everything is in moderation. it's like we're out Friday and Saturday night drinking and doing that's not but that's what I'm saying like that's like we're human experiments here oh this is perfect Wednesday we'll go four drops I forgot we put two we'll do four drops on Wednesday I really get the party start four drops that's when you wake up in the ambulances what happened I don't know wow yeah I just jumped off the fucking building over here four drops man

wow Jimmy for Joey four drops Lee four drops yeah because I did a drop at the house I let it melt And then I put another piece in it. Oh, my God. That's so funny. Oh, my God. Look, look, look, he's squeezing his tetties. Unbelievable.

Yeah, it's fucked up, bro. Stop breathe out your nose. Come on. That's so funny. Stop thinking about. I'm not thinking about anything. Yes, you are. I'm sitting here having a conversation with my man Dindo Rizzi.

And I'm... See? They're coming for you. They're not coming for me. coming for you. No, they're not. I can hold it. And look at the ass. It's in your pocket. No, it's not. Yes, it is. Oh, shit.

I put it in your jacket pocket. I don't have a jacket. Yes, you do. I would never do that thing. Think how much fun you've had. We've had fun. Fuck, yeah, it's fun. You didn't die. You didn't get sick. It's not like we're shooting heroin. It's not like

you're drinking 52 shots for no reason. This was all a light dose. Two hits is a late dose, Lee. I don't know what you're talking about, but this is a big dose. No, tomorrow we'll do four. And the next week we'll take it to eight, six, boom, until we finish it. This is Black History Month.

We're celebrating Black History Month out of respect for Frederick Douglass. People have been bad-mounted him lately, and we're going to do acid fucking every other podcast this month. Sure. Yeah. Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure. Poor Lisa. He's thinking about moving home. Look at him.

It's a chance with every other podcast. That's once a week. That's twice a week. We're going to do the whole month of February on the hit of Sid. How's that way you think for Black History? Hit a Sid month. What fuck is it? Now I hate it from myself.

Thank God. I always do this. I hide the Sid from myself. Oh, man. What's the next band you were going to plan to go see? Man, I'm hoping to see Metallica this Sunday at, palladium. As it sold out?

Well, I don't know what's going on. It's like they're playing the Grammys and then that night they're going to do a show at the palladium and it's like Citibank putting it on or something but I'm trying to get into that. Oh, okay. So Citibank, it's for Citibank cardholders. It might be, yeah, or

it could be also fan club. I don't know, but I'm going to get in somehow. Now they have a new album. That's incredible. Come on. Yeah, I can't believe it. Come on.

I swear, I can't believe it. It's out? Oh, yeah. Yeah, it was number one for a couple weeks. What a fuck do I live? Yeah. This is what I'm saying. I've got to get my life together.

Oh. I understood the album was coming out. Oh, yeah. It was number one already for two weeks? Oh, yeah. Let me get you a song off this. So, Lee, look this one up. Okay.

Dude, this thing is... I didn't fucking know this. Nobody tells me. Dick, Lee, you're in charge of music. If I'm in charge music, we're going to be stuck pretty small. It's time we both got our act together, Lee. We've got to get on top of the ship.

Maybe we'll hire Rain in Basio. Okay, Lee, put on this song right here. I can't read right now, so you have to tell me what. Okay, spit out the bone, Metallica. You got to hear this. Spit out the fucking bone. Yeah, wait to hear this. How long have they been around for? 20 years?

32. 32. 33 this year, yeah. Here you go. Listen to this. It's metal. The, uh, the, uh, album covers. I'm moving. Rockin.

Oh, my God. That was great when it came on. He just went, no. Oh, my God, that's scary. Okay. That's hilarious. I always thought that people just retired one day. days. So in all these years, they only had one personal change. The bass player that left that time?

Two different bass players. One died. Then they got the replacement, Jason, and then he quit. And now they have the third bass player. Now, Jason has his own band now. No, he did. He did. Yeah. And then I don't know what happened. He put out a thing called Newstead like two years ago. It was smoking. And then it just stopped. It was awesome, man. So the new guy, the Trejo? Yep. What's his name? It's, uh, it's, uh, I'm telling you, this shit makes you forget.

These years, we'll get a new. Yeah, right? Uh, Trehalio. Trehalio. Yep. He's good. He's good. Yeah.

He's all in. He's all in. Oh, yeah. He's, I mean, he's great. It's like, what band did he come from? Uh, he was in, uh, suicidal tendencies. Pretty sure that's the band. Look that up, me.

It's, uh, suicide. tendencies I'm pretty sure Trujillo How do you spell his name Trujillo? Yeah, R-U-J-I-L-O Trujillo Trujillo

I don't know fucking Trump's nephews over here At this point I'm supposed to be able Okay, yeah, there you Have a Spanish accent, I'm sorry Look up his groups That's right there Or his groups?

Yeah bands are Discography? Yeah. He has a lot of them. He has Jerry Cantrell, Black Label Society, infectious groups,

suicidal tendencies. Siricidal tendencies. Glenn Typton, mass mental, Ozborn. Glenn Tipton. Yeah. Jesus.

This guy's fucking experienced. Oh, my God. Yeah, he's been to the fucking gang. He replaced Rudy Sarzo. Yeah, he was like the Rudy Sarzo of we grew up.

Yep, he was in Ozzy, you know. He was an Ozzie also. Yeah. He played in Ozzy. Fuck. So these guys get stronger and they just move into stronger bands, it seems like. Yeah. Why is there so many personal changes in heavy metal now?

I think it still comes down to money, you know? Like the lead guy this long. What's Ozzy take home? Oh, shit. What's he pay his band? Give me an example of what is going on in the music industry. Like, I don't know what those guys are. making now, but let's say a big

guy back then was probably making like, you know, five grand a week plus per diem, you know, maybe more, I don't know. All right, when the Eagles incorporated, yeah. It was Glenn Fry,

the drummer. Yeah, John Henley. And they put the other guy in. Joe Walsh. But the guitar player and the other guy at work were fucking employees. Yeah. Yeah. Nice money. I'm not going to lie to you, but they were employees. They got nothing from the recording, nothing, right?

Yeah, I think so. I think they were just, like, hired on. At what point did they get brought on? Well, when they did that reunion tour, they went out with all the guys, right? You know? But what happens is there's dudes that quit, and then the other dudes keep it going. And then the guys that quit go, hey, I want to come back. And they're like, well, you quit.

for years we kept this going so you can't just step right into the same partnership you know what man and what is the usual partnership like if i let's say tomorrow fucking soundguard and fired kim whatever the guitar player yeah and i became the new guitar player you would just be a hired gun that's it yeah forever because once the other three see the more money the pie share go they're not gonna ever, they're like, we'll just hire a guy. You know what I mean? Why chisel? Now, is that guy going to be in on recording sessions? Doesn't he get a cut of the recording sessions?

Yeah, they'll take care of him for that. Yeah, yeah. But not like what everybody else is getting. If he comes up with something, then he could get like songwriting credit while they're, you know, working on music. But some bands, you know, I think look at it as like, well, you know, you're an employee. So you work for us or you record, you tour. or whatever, you know.

I mean, look at you right now. Right now, you're an independent contractor. You don't have an agent. You got a guy that's helping you as your manager. He helps you book some stuff. But pretty much you do all the bookings. I don't have any manager. Oh, he's not managing you?

No. I don't have any manager or agent. You're out there a lone wolf of society. Yeah. Okay. So now you're a lone wolf of a side. You're going to bang it out for two more years. And finally, this is your own wife.

young kid that grew up with a dad who's a rocker is an assistant somewhere yeah he's gonna come up to you and go hey man I really dig you I've been trying to talk this guy my idiot boss into fucking uh booking you

but he says you need to be a little bigger I believe in you how about I put you like six seven weeks you know and you and him put six or seven weeks together to make a little bit of money year later this guy gets promoted he's a junior agent and it's a junior agent fucking Gersh. And you're his first client, you know, so now he could spread his wings a little more.

Now you've got a raise. You're selling tickets, but boom, then you get another raise with this guy. So now you've probably got like three raises. You've been with him for a five or six years. Now you have to get a manager. You're not making top, top Kevin Hart money, so you don't really have to worry. But you're making money at an age where every dollar counts. Yeah. You're not 22 no more. You don't. I'm saying? Yeah, yeah.

At some point, you want to skip away from this game, buy a ranch somewhere, and that's it. Play the guitar and watch your toenails grow. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Like, that's the truth. I don't care. Whatever the fuck it is.

Yeah, you'll still make some money, and you'll still do this, and you'll still do that. But for the most part, yeah. Do you feel it's fair that this manager comes on? You have to give them everything you're making when you and this other guy, he's been booking you for,

for five or six years. He's gotten you the pretty good fucking money. I come in here and I'm like, I'm going to be your manager, Dean, that right? You have to give me 10% of your road money. The same road money that you and I, that you and this agent have been working for. Yeah.

How do you feel about that? Man. Do you tell you deal with them? Do you say, listen, I can't give you as much as him because he's been here from the day one. Well, yeah, I think people will take a cut because they're like, at least they're getting something, you know?

part of the money, you know? What I always would do is like, if somebody wanted to manage me, I would say, okay, anything that you get and bring to me will split, but everything I get is just on my own. Oh no, that's me

that's my philosophy all the way through. Yeah. If you got your name on my IMDB and you got your name on my other thing that you're supposed to submit through and some motherfucker calls me at the house, guess what? I'm cutting you the fuck out. Obviously

that shit didn't stick out, you know what I'm saying? You better change the name of the company or letter A so they can see it first because really, that's what it is. For years I got that. They call you so they don't have to pay the Vig. They know that. If they don't call the agent, they save $300, a little better hotel room, a

little bigger trailer. You know, with a good agent you get all these little things. I got your gown water. Yeah. I got your mustache. I got your this. Without that agent, you won't get those little things. That's what I did for years. Yeah. And you see the difference before being a fucking greedy fuck for a $10 difference yeah one day I just said no you gotta call my agent and once I started telling people to call my agent guess what happened yeah I got no

word yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah for people to know fucking agents yeah yeah you know it's so creepy they're looking for people with no agents yeah so they could go right this job pay scale plus you get a hotel room okay totally then two years later you find out that the guy that comic that couldn't shine your shoes. He was at three yards. Guess what they were paying him? They were paying him 2,500 an episode. Yeah.

A hotel room, a plane ticket. And meanwhile, you're like, what the fuck did I do? Yeah. If I would have got an agent that had half a heartbeat, he would have got me some fucking dough, you know? Yeah. I got a guy left that I feel bad about.

Not the sharpest guy in the shit. But I love him because he'll do exactly what you tell him to do. Yeah. And that takes balls. Yeah. If you tell them, listen, tell them 50,000 for the row. They ain't going to give you 50,000 for the row. But you can just have a good time and send this guy in there 50,000.

He'll call you back, stuttering, like, listen, listen, listen, listen. They almost hung up on me. But listen, it's a good thing. They really want you. They really want you. They really want you. So, they're not going to give you $50,000. That's off the table.

It's a $100,000 a day movie, Joey. That's why I tell you $50,000, because I don't want the row. You're saying? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I want them to hang up on you. I had this one role. These people would not leave me to fuck alone. An emcee with one arm.

They wanted me to put a tuxedo on and tuck my arm away behind my back. Yeah. And I had one arm on stage. They couldn't figure out I was going to do it. They went from $100 to $2,000 a day. Wow. That's how much this agent beat him up. I kept saying, get him $1,500.

Then he would call me back. You're going to confirm on that? And I go, get him for $17.50. Wow. I had this guy going in and out of there. About 10 days like an animal that he is. He's got that he had to deal the entire time. This is a $100 low-budget film.

Yeah. I said for them, before I go in there and send me the fucking cast list, I want to see who was in this movie. There's nobody. Yeah. I'm like, wait a second. I'm not doing this for $100 a day, so I sent fucking Godzilla in there.

Yeah. Like I said, Godzilla's not the smartest guy, but he'll go in there like a fucking, like nothing, dog. Yeah, yeah. I can call him back. Get me $250. Yeah, I'll do it for $250. Do you want to commit?

Let me check my dates. I'll call you in the morning. I don't call them in the morning. Those dates aren't any good. Get him for $500. And then he would get me the fucking date for a nickel. I fuck with him for five or six days. Unbelievable.

I did this for a while with this dude. That is so funny. And they finally said, fuck it, $2,000 a day, three days. Oh, my God. It was a score. Yeah. I just did not want them. Yeah.

We worked them from a yardstick. Yeah. Fuck you and your 100-a-law-old day movie. I didn't move to California to do a hundred-in-law fucking day movies, though. That's a way. I hate talking about money on the podcast, but I want you guys that listen to this know that they'll come to you and go, all we can give you is $100 a day.

But meanwhile, they could give you $10,000 a fucking day. They just don't want to do it. And they are giving $10,000 a job. And they are giving $10,000. They're people who have, like, a good agent or somebody who asked for it. I finally real, listen, if you don't ask for it, you're not going to get it. Yeah. The worst thing they can say is, I can't.

can't do that but they're not not gonna give you the job so asked for it yep if I don't want to do the fucking job I'm gonna hit them with a number that's gonna rock their fucking world yeah I want them to hang up the phone and that's okay I didn't want to do the job yeah you know I don't want to be in that movie I don't want to do this I don't do so yeah you have to ask for your value sometimes what you see yeah you know the problem with comedy is that when we get here we judge our value on how funny we are fucking disguise getting a TV show I'm way funny in him you know that I killed by them at the store I'm telling you he can't follow me you got to follow me at the

cafe so lurk he couldn't find you know oh that shit just goes in your mind and then one day you realize the business aspect of it yeah it's like even with that twist sister documentary we spoke about they were the bank account and nobody wanted to sign them yeah sometimes that happens you know how frustrating that feeling that's got to be crazy right and the catalog was in a vault is that what you said no the catalog was a The catalog was in the vault. I thought you did the catalog with their, like, their catalog was in a vault or something. Who's catalog?

Oh, no, that was the podcast that I was talking about a few hours ago. No, just right right now. Never mind, okay. This is, no, we're talking about the Twister sister document. Right. How many times they failed and even this was a guy, this was a band who had an audience. That all you had to do was sign them. You were going to start making money right away.

Totally. This isn't like I got to sign Lee and start from scratch and put them in Tuscaloosa. and then build them up. This is at the top. The money machine. This is the money machine, dog. So it's pretty interesting that no matter what level, you always get fucking homes and bumps.

I'm sure Eddie Murphy wants movies that you don't get. Yeah. I'm sure. I even stars like that. I read that script. I'd be perfect for it. And they're like, fuck you. Yeah.

You're 20 years too fucking old, stupid. I'm going to change the whole direction of the movie because you want to try to make a comeback. Suck my dick. Because, yeah, they're hustles. scripts too totally you know when you're not working you're hustling scripts if you are not well not even if you're well not who wants to sail away into the night in this fucking society yeah without fucking working you know I don't like

I said I don't have the patience to look at scripts no more yeah I want to do stand up I want to do the podcast if the animal planet thing works so be it I'm ready to work with cats if it doesn't I'll move the fucking on or yeah we'll pitch a different idea you know but something that's got to be in a micro setting I'm not I'm not ready for all that big shit anymore. That's, I'm through with that shit. I just want to do me, Lee, a boom, and let's go. Let's shoot this shit.

You got it? Yeah, move on. I got to sit here for two hours. You didn't turn the mic on. Go fuck you something. That's the quickest way to fucking get me on enchanted. How about an enchanted fucking evening? Any more waters?

Yeah, here. Oh, yeah. Everybody's fucking thirsty. Lee, you want another water? You're drinking any water? you gotta dehydrate your stuff. You said I drink water. That acid's burning a hole in your stomach.

Oh my God. Oh, my God. Oh, yeah. What I'll do is give you a fucking water with a little acid in it. A slow dilute. It's like a mild coffee, you know what I'm saying? Oh, fuck. Ah, ha ha, ha, slow dilute.

Every time you drink water, you get a flashback. That ever happened to you, do ever get fucked up on vodka and ice tea? Oh, yeah, we did check Daniels. That did, ooh. Every time I smelled it, just vaugh. You ever get like, you ever drink like vodka and iced tea? Yeah, there was vodka. And you go home and then you wake up in the middle night to get some of drinking his iced tea.

Oh. And it tastes like ass because you can still taste the vodka in it. That's where I'll give you. I'll give you a dilater. Let me give you a water. Let me give you a splash. I'm not taking nothing that you're giving me. Come on, though.

You seem like a Cosby all of a sudden. I've been your uncle for five fucking years. You don't trust me now. I'm not doing anything. That's hilarious. So you're doing a theater in Denver when? February 18th On the Saturday night

Saturday night Doing the Sioux Teatro Theater And if you punch in the Precoat of Candles Lit You'll get a discount But yeah That's going to be interesting

I love Denver man Doing comedy there One of my top He contacted you out of the blue Yeah he He listens to the podcast And I think he saw me The last time

I was headlining out there I said hey you want to do it And I said, let's do it. He's done it right, man. He made an ad. He's got radio ad. And then I got kind of a little cheap TV spot. He's going for it.

So he's going for it. Nothing wrong with that. Nope. Love it, man. While you're there, you'll see a show or two. You're flying on the 17th early. You can fly Burbank Southwest. That's the best.

Like a doctor right into Denver, two hours. You're ass don't hurt. I take the early one to the first nonstopper. Oh, it's great. You do Burbank? You go on the way there. Herbank only. God.

Back Sunday on the Lord's Day, no problem. Nobody gets their feelings hurt. Awesome, right? It's a beautiful fucking thing. You know, it's funny how I get kind of fucked up with stand-up. But once you're up there, even like in Nashville, like I said, Friday and Thursday and then I had rough fucking sets, the early shows. But once I get into the flow, that's it, I'll murder you. You know what I'm saying?

The only problem is that the new material I got wasn't doing anything. Right. I fractured on it by Friday. I just got rid of it. I'm like, this shit ain't working, though. Oh, man. This shit ain't working. I'm not trying this shit, no.

I went back and put an extra material in the notebook with the date on it, I'm done. Oh, that's the worst. This was a lot funnier on paper than what it was on stage. You know what I'm saying? This was a lot funny in my head than what it really was on fucking stage. Wow. How long were you in on it? 20 minutes.

I thought I had 20 minutes. My first 20 minutes. I was excited and shit. It was like Doom getting kicked on me. I tried it the other night, too, and it didn't work. Who am I kidding? I was just forcing it, and I'm like, this ain't working. Then I watch Bill Burr's special the other day,

and it makes you feel bad as a comic, but then it shouldn't, because all that is is a result of hard work. Yeah, totally. He writes every day, you know, either the fucking comic strip TV show or his stand-up. He dedicates real, real time to it, I got to take my hat off to him, man. You know, he's about to go into a different realm, fatherhood.

Yep. It's a different set of fucking materials and jokes, you know, which I've opened up about a little bit, but not really. It's like you've got to keep something close to your heart at times, you know? So I still don't know how to act towards it. Like, it's not like my whole fucking act. Because, let's face, I got other fucking disgusting thoughts

going through my mind and shit at different times of the day. Yeah. I can't just say I'm a full-time fucking dead, and I feel this way, and I'm giddy, and I fly around with butterflies and shit. Because I really don't. You still got to figure out how to keep the lights on and how to fucking, you know,

keep doing what you do and get your rest and be healthy, you know. It's so weird how we both turned to the health thing the last couple of years. Yeah. Once you, this is the shit. And I tell Lee all the time, you know, there's this shit that we didn't take care of. when we were 30 and 32, that comes back to bite you in the ass.

It does, man. And then later on, you've got to go back to these drastic measures anyway. Yeah. If I could have done it all over again, I would have got rid of soda when I was like 25. I would have got rid of juices. Yeah. You know? Totally.

I would have continued my exercise routine, even if it was something at home. If I couldn't make a move to the gym, I'd still do 50 squats, 50 pushups, 50 burpers, 50 burpers, 50 burpees, you know. Yeah. I'd still try to do all those things, you know. Sleep. Jesus Christ. Yeah, that's the one I don't do at all.

That's number one. I cast it sleep off for 10 years. Yeah. That's the one that ages you. That's the one that fucks up your biological clock. That's the one that fucks up your center nervous system. You know, when you're doing bumps of coke at 4 in the morning. Yeah.

And you have to sleep for 20 hours. It does something to your, you know, when you're doing meth or whatever the fuck you're doing, And it shocks the sense. You know, that's why the first year acupuncture, she said to me, she goes, I'm just getting rid of trauma every week. Yeah. All the trauma your body went through,

I got to get rid of it one step of the time, little by little, you know, and then after that, then I got to heal it. Then I got to build your chi up. But for starters, I got all that shit traumatizes your body, sleeping in a van. Yeah. You know, bombing, drinking whiskey,

eating bad pussy. Yeah. You lose fucking marks at every level, you know. Dirty food. Oh, my God. The diet I was on from 2000 to 2008 was just, I went on with this fucking sabbatical of that starting like a 99, you know. Yeah. My metabolism shut completely down.

I wasn't living in Boulder anymore. I wasn't living with the high altitude, which burns calories naturally. I wasn't walking anywhere, no more. I'd become a roadcom. Yeah. And instead of taking advantage of the gyms at the hotels and shit, I wasn't doing that either. I was just eaten and eating that, you know, like onion rings. I was never, listen, I controlled myself after I moved to New York City, the fried stuff.

Oh, yeah, the mozzarella sticks. But I would go to. You don't like that stuff at all? I love it, but it's like, that shit's death. I come from North Berger, New Jersey, where Italians were fucking groomed. I think I've eaten three mozzarella sticks in my life, and that's it. I don't even know what a mozzarella stick. I didn't know what the mozzarella stick.

Oh, man. I never saw one of those things in the fucking East Coast. I fucking love those things. I like wetluts. We're sliced in on a fucking prosciutto sandwich with some roasted peppers and shit. There's some vinegar. I'm all in, motherfucker.

But that other shit, I don't know what the fuck you're talking about. I really don't. Yeah. Oh, I love that. You're going to give me the paperwork, Lisa? Yeah, you're just going to stare into fucking space and look around.

Dream of having pajamas on and shit. See, it ain't that bad, Lee. I'm fine. I'm just... It circles around. Yeah, just circle around. That circle around. Please.

Want to do another drop? Not really. We'll dilute it with little water. It's been diluted with it. I know, no, no. Let me see. Give me water. Give me water.

Drink it down to under the blue. I'll fill up to one, too. Bro, it's going to calm me down a little bit. I can see it already. It's getting your forehead. I can see in your forehead. You're losing energy and shit. This is like a red bull thing.

Trust me. I've been doing this for 30 years. Would I lie to you? Yes. I'm like the erythmics. When I lie to you, though? When I lie to you. I wouldn't fucking lie to my...

You're the number one fucking producing the game. How am I going to lie to you, though? You made fucking mince meat out of nothing. Look at you. Over there rubbing your little chubby, good Jewish head and shit. Thinking about the numbers, what are you going to tell Paul? And Paul is going to find out. No, I don't care about that.

She's sleeping. Yeah? She doesn't care. She doesn't care at all. You got a cool one, huh? Yeah, she's really nice. You want to take a drop home for her, putting her coffee for the house? No, she takes the bus.

She has to go to the courthouse tomorrow. Whatever, wherever she works. Two drops. Joey, two drops. Wherever she works, not at the courthouse, but. Wherever she works. Give her a little blast on this in the morning. No.

Joey two drops up. Put a little pink floyd for her in the morning before she takes the train. See what happens. Yeah, see what happens. What's going to happen? She ain't going to be mad or you're going to open up her mind. You're going to sit there. You're going to watch Law & Order with her.

And then it'll all come to her. Yeah, if she stays home. That's good. Yeah, but you're talking about what she's already at work when this happens. No, no, no. You're telling her not to go to work there. You doced her. Just dose her when she's in the shower.

That'd be fun one day to do. Yeah, that could happen. If she comes, she eats breakfast and dosed and then say, I got to tell you something, you know, I love you. You can't go to work. Like, call and sing. Why? Because in 16 fucking seconds, you're going to start feeling things down in your spine.

and shit it's gonna hit you heavy than it hits me I've had basic training with Uncle Joey you've had no training yeah I make you either half a stone we giggle like two fucking momos I'm just dosing you with America's finest fucking look at you half of them puff I'm okay okay oh to see for how long you know me to call the ambulance no I'm okay you sure yeah yeah I'm okay I'm okay I'm fine yeah because it's did you smoke some more We could if you want to. That's what you need, darling. You need to take a hit of the savage.

You need to hit this other shit, the Godfather. Okay. Right. That's what you need. You need to count down a little, I smoke the whole fucking thing this time. One hit ain't going to do nothing for nobody. You got to fucking hit this thing. Like it owes your $20.

You know what? Yeah, like it owes you $20. What's that stuff, Jerry? This is the Godfather. This is a fucking indica direct from the jungles. What was that other one? smoked 24 carrot from perennial and shit fucking 24 both of them are from fucking perennial knocking motherfuckers out 24 B yeah it's so funny because uh I would never buy I'd still be

wearing white cotton underwear if me and these didn't come into my life I really wouldn't I didn't even know underwear like me and these existed I didn't know underwear like me and these would be comfortable I mean don't get me wrong I've seen other types of briefs, but they weren't for me. I'm an old school boxer and an old school fucking cotton, whitey, tidy, whitey type of guy. I don't even like black underwears. I see black underwear and a guy, you fucking hide this up.

You got crabs. You don't want to show me your blood pins and shit. Some ain't right, cocksucker. So now, guess what? If I fly command though, maybe 60, 40. But if I got underwear, I got on me on these. for two reasons. One, comfort, and the second reason, how moist

and dry. Dry it keeps me. You know why? Because a mowedaw. Picture of world we're putting out a new pair underwear. Isn't just fresh. You're stepping into a better day. Think about that. When you get up in the morning, you put your underwear on, you're like, ha. It's going to be a great fucking day. Think about it. Underwear is the first thing you put on, the last thing you take off.

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You're going to love them. That's meondies.com slash Joey. Number two, Lee, last week you and I had a conversation. You called me up. I think it was the night you ate the fake chocolate. And you were talking online. It was not fake chocolate. What Paula was talking.

It was fake chocolate. Let's face it. Did you smoke that pipe, Bailey? Not yet. I was trying to hold out for the... No, no. Hit that fucking meal. Okay.

This is what I live with. I just told him to smoke and he leaves it there. Hit that thing. That's nothing. Come on, let's go. Stop being a half of fruit. Let's go. That's going to calm you.

done. Take a good fucking old mule here, right there. Leave it on there. No, no, no, no. Go ahead. Come on. Look at him. Look at what I got to deal with. You see this? No, no. Give it the fucking pipe. Because I'm going to hit you in the head with it because you aggravating me on purpose. Go like this. Straight-lipped.

Straight thing and light it. Don't light it like this like a candle. There you go. Now, leave it there for a second. Go a little closer. Tilt it to 2 o'clock. There you go. You said I got to deal with it. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Leave the pipe on the fucking fire. Do you, do you see this? Baby hits. Do you see what he's doing to me? Baby hits. He wants to embarrass me in front of the church family. I'm trying to embarrass anybody. Huh?

Oh, my God. I'm just, I've never smoked with this pipe before. Just. You've been smoking with that pipe for the last week and a half? Not really. Oh, Jesus Christ. He said I got to deal with. Anyway.

Paula was cooking what last week when I caught? The West African peanut chicken. It was delicious. It was, I love peanut sauce. And it was really good. We made some, I think it was Jasmine Rice came with it. It was delicious. It was, it was the best blueprint that we've had.

I loved it. I'm going to make it again. It came with Jasmine Rice. I think so, but it can, it would work with anything. I think it would work with beef. I think it would work with chicken. It obviously worked with chicken. It could probably maybe work with fish.

Who knows? but it was just, it was really good. It was easy to make. Yeah, it took Paul like 45 minutes. They'll make the whole thing. For less than $10 per person per meal, Blue Apron will deliver seasonal recipes along with proportioning ingredients

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Dean Delray, sorry to get you off on a bad start. No way. That was funny. Right? I don't like to see you like that. You're a sharp kid. So we have to do this again sometime, you know. Get together again, you know. But I love that you came on and you smoke. You volunteered to smoke the death, you know?

Yeah. We don't fucking around with raw materials here. Everything we bring into the studio is 100% you're going to get killed. I had to take the ride with you guys. Yeah, this is no fucking, we don't play in here. When I go to the weed store, they know. This new girl they got is a professional. The last three batches she's given me.

She told me this is what you want. Yeah, that stuff was killing. Man A little dirty white chick With freckles Yeah They know their Riefer Man

From the Midwest They know their Rief I guess so Not these little fucking Hollywood Valley girls They just look good And they saw you What you know

I'll sell you a junk Yeah That blue purple shit These little dirty white chicks In the Midwest I love them dirty feet Yeah She had yoga pants on

She's all warped in shit But she knows I'll smoke of weed So that's all I care about Yeah Fuck about that shit Yeah Lee, you survived.

You're like the Tom Brady a podcast. You know that? No, I'm not. Who's better than you? Nobody, Lee. Nobody. I broke your balls for 20 days about that acid. For three weeks, I've been tormenting them.

It's at the house boiling. And I got another batch and this batch. We've got about two months of acid. Oh, yeah, Lee. We're going into acid training. Look at Lee. You got a depressed all this. I'm not depressed.

I like it. It's a big process. What process? What do you mean? What? You go home? You have a milkshake, you go to bed, and we do it again tomorrow and night with different strain. I'm not going to see bed before Wednesday.

Nah, you'll be asleep tonight. Listen, dog, you see that banister, weed? I'm going to leave you with that whole container weed. Yeah. When I come back here tomorrow, that better be all gone. That's going to be you until 6 in the morning. Token, token, when you leave here, you go to the no-hole diner, you get two eggs, bacon, some toast. You go home nice with your belly full.

and you call it a nice. Nah. That's how professional goes. That's how you do it. Don't go home and cook. Don't go home and talk to nobody. You don't want to talk to nobody. You're not going to talk to nobody.

There's nothing to talk about. You're going to get your two eggs down the corner. The waitress wants to talk to you talked to for two minutes. After that, you walk in the house about 6.30. As she's getting up, you don't know nothing. Where were you? I don't know. I bumped into some Martians that made me take something.

Nobody knows nothing. You think I'm going to tell my wine nothing? My wife saw the shirt. use. She didn't see the acid. She thought, but what do I give a fuck? Right or wrong? Yep. As long as I don't say nothing. As long as they don't see it, it didn't happen. Yeah. I always remember that, my friend. If they don't see it, it didn't fucking happen. Unless you bring a clamor or take a picture or tweet it like a half a fag. You'll be fine. We're surrounded by clamors. I love you, motherfucker. See you Wednesday night.

8 o'clock. Same back time. Same back channel. Don't forget to support my brother, Dean Delray. February 18th in Denver. What's the name of the theater? Sue Teatro. Can they go to your website to get tickets? Yep. Yep. And there's a link, a code.

Candles lit. Get your discount ticket. A little discount for you. See you. Nice. Go have a great time. I love your cock suckers. See you Wednesday night. 8 p.m.

Same bad time. Same bad channel. Two. We're doing two tonight. We'll do four doses Wednesday night. Oh, my God. I love you guys. Stay back.