The Church of What's Happening Now: The New Testament - #507 - Action Bronson

Episode Date: August 15, 2017

Action Bronson, rapper and host of many shows including "Fuck That's Delicious" on the Viceland network, joins Joey Diaz and Lee Syatt LIVE in studio. This podcast is brought to you by:   Onnit.com. Use Promo code CHURCH for a 10% discount at checkout.   Recorded live on 08/14/2017.
  

And it don't make me sick. Greetings. This episode of the church of what's happened now is brought to you by Onit. Onit for all your supplement needs. Go to Onet.com right now and press in. Church. Bam! And get 10% off.

This podcast is also brought to you by Utopia, California. Listen, you motherfuckers know I'm with Star 1 gummy bears. But there's peanut butter macaroons or put a motherfucking hem in your skirt. And they're vegan, correct? They are. And kosher. And kosher. Like a motherfucker.

Rabbi could eat it. Are you fucking nuts or what? 20 to life, no parole. In studio, my main man action Bronson. The flying Jew. Kick it Lee. The half-and-half wild fucking traveler of the stars. Hit it.

It's the church of what's happened now, motherfuckers. Monday. August 14th. Tomorrow. 29 days, 29 years I've got sank to prison 29 years Congratulations, man

Are you fucking fucking fuck damn Or what? Are you fucking nuts? 20 to life, motherfuckers Say, Shogun, kill her to the and drum Oh shit, it's the church

Hit it! What's happening now? Monday, Tuesday, motherfuckers. Action. In the motherfucking house. Lisa, yeah. In the motherfucking house. Let's do this.

Do this. Uh. Uh. I love it. What's happening? You bad motherfuckers. Thank you for a great weekend in San Francisco last week. I think actually wants to thank San Francisco too.

For sure. Thank you very fucking much. How many nights did you do up there? It was two nights. It was phenomenal. Phenomenal. Phenomenal. We did a little intimate setting.

Five hundred people. on Saturday the night before Outside lands That was fucking crazy Some fucking beautiful women In the front row They definitely wanted to have sex

I was acting Saddidi Because I love my woman You know At the end of the day My dick is on a shelf But it's a nice shelf You know what I mean It's a Colombian shelf

You get temptations on the road With men with men there's beautiful women everywhere but you know home is where the heart is it really is there's nothing like having a good woman there's nothing like having a fucking good woman that supports you and that's what I got

you know a great fucking man when I was a kid once he was older than me and we were talking about something at this time he was very successful he had a gas station he was doing a thousand things and I said I think this chick's got the hearts for you you're gonna give her a stab and he looked at me

He goes, why would I? He goes, I got a woman at home that was there when I had $2. Now that I'm rocking and rolling, I'm going to cheat on it. And I was like, you know what? You got a fucking point. Fucking bullshit. I get tempted. We all get fucking tempted.

You know, I'm getting older. I'm 54. When I see like two 19-year-olds, you ever drive around and you see like a 19-year-old couple, like an 18-year-old couple holding hands with school books, you know they're going home to fuck. And they got their five-thirt. Remember those old days? You only had a little time. When you had to 5.30 to fuck, eat, suck tinnies.

Come on their stomach. Beg them to take it in the ass. Beg them to suck your dick. They had to cry. You got a box of tissues. Of course. You had a grandmother. There's always an argument.

An argument. Yeah. Oh, my fucking God. Young arguments over dick sucking. I remember those, man. Goodness. But that's never going to happen again. That's never going to happen again.

No, I had a couple arguments. I have some arguments here and there over getting my dick suck. you still do sometimes you know it's it's real life shit you gotta fucking have an argument sometime over it it's like you know if you don't get the fucking hint what do you want me to do you want me to fucking shit on your head like what do you want me to do here how long have you been with you a woman for like four years now four years yeah oof mm-hmm i remember my woman for 17 18 fucking years all right i can't wait there's no argue no blow jobs no it's fun it's a little it's it's a fun

arguments. It's like practice. It's practicing for being a lawyer. Now, you have a 10 year old. I do and a 12 year old. From a different. I do. From two different? Not one, the same one. So you always, when you,

and were you with that baby's mama for a while? No, we weren't together for a long time. We were young, 20 years old, you know? It was young shit. I had a young fucking dick at the time, and I was just fucking whaling out. crazy, isn't it? It's like you have to relives. It's a wild life. You know, now you have another child. Like, I have a

child that's 26, I have no contact with it the last 10 years. We just don't talk. Because me and the mom had a fucked up divorce. Now at this year, I've got another curveball thrown at you. I got a little baby at the house. So it's all ironic how you learn from different relationships.

It's crazy. It's crazy. Like, now I want this. I'm like you. I want this relationship. For sure. This is what you hold to, man. Like, I fucking think about getting home to them, you know, I want to have another baby for sure. I want to give my woman a child and I'm fucking fertile. I look at her, she'll fucking have 20 in her pussy. I'm telling you, I've been fucking, I've been getting women pregnant since 13.

Now, how many Spanish, how are you messing with Spanish women? Since as long as I can remember. And you love them. They're the ones that drive you fucking nuts. You speak Spanish. A fucking Brazilian Anything with a tan skin Drives you fucking crazy

I go I go nuts Guyaniese Freak me out I love it I used to go to Jiu-Jitsu with this girl I don't know what she was Nicaragua By her fucking skin color

Her feet With nice and like this beige Creamy brown I just wanted to suck her fucking feet I'm fucking olive I get 16 fucking years You know what I'm saying Let's make of you

16 years if you just grab a woman's foot and start sucking the motherfucker like a savage guy's definitely got a problem that skin color it was fucking beautiful i love different skin car i fucking love him love him i'm cubing the land of 92 different skin colors so you need a little fucking you know difference i don't want to see the same shit i got the motherfucker the motherfucking albanian jew is on the show fucking believe slinging dick and giving out fuck now you have a new project coming out. Yeah, man. What's blue chips?

Blue chips is just, you know, when I first started doing that shit, I was really thinking about fixing basketball games and just the correlation of me being this new up-and-comer fucking Nick Nolte's over here

buying my mother a tractor, bags of money, you know what I mean? So I come and play. That's what the whole fucking thought, the thought process behind it was trying to make it seem, like I'm a new

I'm a fucking blue chipper so I'm shaving points I'm doing this it was really just the fucking in my own mind some crazy shit I love that movie Shaq Penny

fucking Nick Nolte going nuts fucking who else is in that the fucking woman Sarandon Susan Sarandon Susan Sarandon so I don't know

it just it correlated something in my mind and I just it's one of those projects where I just fucking wrap my ass off. I just do whatever the fuck I want.

I don't even give a shit. I honestly don't care. Ever since people been telling me you got to get action on the fucking show. I listen to a couple of your fucking music, your videos, Easy Rider. Oh yeah. The other one that you got thrown off the fucking tour for.

Oh, yeah. They didn't let you in college. What else? That's a fucking old. I didn't even fucking perform that fucking song. No? Not one fucking time. I wouldn't be able to tell anybody the goddamn words. People are crazy.

You're beautiful, man. That's what I saw. You got a tremendous fucking rapping style. Thank you, man. It's real. It doesn't sound like, you know, you're pushing. You're just talking, man. That one, when you have the old dudes dancing.

Oh, yeah. Oh, my God, I was fucking dying one night in the hotel room. Like, one in the morning. I go, what the fuck? What the fucking I asked him Bronson? And that's the first thing I saw. What's this video about? I got no idea.

We just showed up. No fucking idea. No idea. That's how we do it. You got, like, you got, like, you know. Like a weird mind, man. And it all started with cooking. That's what you're trying to tell me?

I mean, I don't know if that's where it started. What was the first time you fucking fell in love with food? Like, you're like, I got to get in that fucking kitchen and cook this shit right. I've been a fat piece of fucking garbage my whole life. I don't know. I just love food from the fucking very first time I tasted a hamburger on white bread or a fucking Albanian dish that my grandmother made. What's an Albanian dish?

Like fucking burrek. You ever had burrek? No. It's like almost a stuffed pizza, but the dough is a little bit more delicate. It's like a fucking baclavado. You ever back? Yes. It's stuffed with meat, but not sweet.

You feel me? Yes. Something like that. Very peasant, but very, it takes a lot of skill to make. Is that the same thing as like a baraka in Israel? It's similar. They have similar names. It's a stuffed pastry.

Yeah. Now you're Albanian. Jewish. Everybody cooking this house. So one night you had Jew food. Nah, the thing, you had Albanian food. With the Jew food, it wasn't really like, I don't know what the fuck, like the Jew is, like, my, my fucking

grandparents came to Alice Island. We're from New York, you know? My grandfather's from fucking St. Marks in Saratoga right there in Brownsville. Motherfucking original Brownsville people, you know what I mean? My mother was born in Brownsville. So then New York Jews. She eats fucking pork.

She smokes weed. She's fucking. an incredible person. You know what I mean? And she married a very, very strict Muslim man. Albanian, you know, brought his entire family over. And it was just my mom

and my Albanian family. So I grew up that way. We didn't know, I didn't know about, like, Jew food unless I went to my, to my grandfather and shit. But it was fucking 50 people smoking cigarettes in the house,

screaming, speaking of language, I had no idea what the fuck was going on. You know what I mean? It was a crazy fucking time. Did you celebrate anything Jewish? Of course.

Every fucking holiday that you can get out of school. Now what would this Albanian fucking Muslim say at the other side of the table when you got to open the door and let Jesume in? What's the guy? What's the dude's name that comes on Passover? The fucking ass. I don't even know it's Jewish.

I don't even know shit like that. I just know that there's questions. Elijah. There's questions and shit. I don't know what kind of questions. You have to ask some dumb shit. There's Jewish women who are really good cooks, but like Jewish food kind of sucks. Don't you fucking dare talk about Jewish food.

No, because, okay, the pot roast is delicious, lotis are delicious. Is that all you know? No, there's more, but I don't like... Whitefish? Mothal. That's sable? Yeah. Salmon.

I like salmon. I don't like Monsabal soup. Are you out of your mind? You like Kreplach? I don't know. You like Kreplach soup? I don't think so. You like wantons?

Of course I was. The fucking Jewish wets. wanton. It is. It's a Jewish wanton. That's all that is. That's all it is. It's fucking stuffed with meat.

Okay. It's a skin stuffed. So the wanton, they just put in the soup. The creplach, they fucking fry the shit first, then put it in the soup. Is it one of the ones that have, what's that, what's that hot dog topping that they try to put in one of those? Sourcrow. Don't I put a shower crowd in it? Are you a fucking Jew?

What are you? I don't know. Not really. I'm a reform Jew. I mean, listen, there's just a lot of fucking amazing food. A pastri. You know what we don't like pastrami? Smoked meats that are cured.

Corn beef. Brisket? He don't like them. Pickles. You can't say pick. You can't say pickles. What do you get at a Jewish fucking deli? You get pickles right away.

He gets potato chips. That too. That too. That too. Listen. There's so much. What a. about fucking

Kashkavanovichish. You're just making up words now. Is that something really... That's a real fucking... Noodle kugul. Oh yeah, no, Kugul is good. That's true. That's fire, man.

The Koshkavonikish is stupid. Comparatively, wouldn't you say other cultures blow Jewish food out of the water? I would say... I mean, it's different. The Jews contributed a lot to culinary history.

Okay. Chala? It's bread. It's bread. It's... It's delicious, but it's bread. You say I got to deal with. So wait a second.

This guy goes on Yelp for food reviews before he's the fucking guy that writes it. Listen to me. I don't write, it's just bread. It's delicious. But bread is, you understand how unique and how hard it is to make bread good? Yes. Yes, it's the while I guess. And the Jews have perfected it in so many different ways.

But then what? Then why do they keep us with Manta? Why do they make us eat Monsa every year? Because they had to fucking get the hell about it in. They had to make something quick. It was just a snack. It's terrible. I like fucking matza with butter.

I like a lot of things, man. That's crazy. You're a fucking self-loathing Jew. That's all you are. I guess so. And you technically are Jewish because it's on your mother's side. And I hate myself because I believe in the stars. What stars?

So many of them are in the sky. The ones that connect three. Is that like Kabbal? Serious. Nah, I don't know what that is. I've never heard of that. I'm from Queens. They call it synagogue.

It's the Jews that have the red string on their wrist. I don't know that one, man. It's Madonna Jews. I don't know that fucking dude. I wish I knew how to fucking cook. I'll take care of you, man. I'll show you some shit. Easy, easy, easy shit.

Listen, you're a fat fuck. You have ideas. Like, I know how to dope shit up. Like, I can take a steak and turn it into a fun of a mignon. You know what I'm saying? But there's a certain thing. Like, I had a friend that went and was trained. and the whole fucking thing.

And he made desserts. And on Monday nights, he would make the desserts. And I would sit there with him and sample them and write jokes all night. This is when I first started doing comedy. But I would watch him do his thing, man. And I was mystified. I just didn't have the time

that put four years in a fucking kilnery institute. I'd rather work under somebody and learn how to fucking cook. But, you know, who the fuck's going to teach you? That's really how you... That's where you fucking learn everything. That's how you learn everything in the kitchen where the fucking Mexicans are touching each other's

asses and fucking crying, laughing and talking shit and fucking cursing at each other. That's where you learn how to cook. It's not in the school like that. Nah, they give you the basis, but they don't fucking teach you how to interact with Mexican dudes and people in the kitchen and fucking learn how to fucking cook hard. You know what I mean? You've cooked hard. Very hard.

Like high volume. extremely I've high volume fucking heat I've also fucking cooked on Viagra with my fucking balls were going to explode so I've cooked hard

in so many ways that's crazy whenever I've seen a chef in fucking action you know like orders coming up he's got two dudes next to him but he's the captain Kirk of the Enterprise but I've seen that

my eyes like I drew like that's the shit shit that I get impressed with. It's phenomenal. And then how he tells me how the reason why he put this sauce was on this, this texture. Like, okay, let's break

something down. It's thoughtful. It's thoughtful shit. Let's talk about something we were talking about before. Please. Our boy, he is Dominican, Puerto Rican. I'm Cuban. We had some flavor to the room. So beans got to come up. Okay, I go to a Cuban join.

And I'm telling this, I was raised in a Cuban house. Black beans are fucking freeholas. Flihole, right. I didn't think about this until about this. 10 years ago, you know,

you get fucking black beans and you put them on white rice and you spin it around and you get your favorite garlic chicken. Delicious. And you eat it, and it's phenomenal. But then they got a thing

called out Romoto. What do I add to the black beans and rice? It's like some type of fat to make it really fucking... You add that. You had a fucking little bit of Laurel, some fucking bay leaf, you know. You use the fucking black bean cooking liquid to cook the rice. That's the difference.

So they take the fucking white rice and then they mix it with the fucking black bean liquid. And that's what makes the rice black. And it has that fucking flavor. You know what I mean? What's the name of that steak sandwich place in New York, Joey? The Cuban. On the West New York side. Yeah.

Now I can't think about it. I can't remember the name of it. Now I'm too fucking stone. We've smoked 82 joints, eating 16 fucking stars. The fucking stars are ridiculous. We had a bunch of couple stems. I'm going to fucking drive home backwards. Oh, fuck yeah.

You have no idea. These stars are tremendous. These stars are dead. And guess what? They got one side effect. Hunger like a motherfucker. Good thing. I got a fucking big stomach.

Hunger like a motherfucker. I got a $50 million. That's why I only eat them twice a week, man. If you get hungry as fuck, there's a tremendous podcast. People coughing. People trip those mushrooms are bogusly. How are they bogus?

How do you get bogus? They were fugasies. Hey, they were fugazi mushrooms. I can get you some nice ones, man. No, no. They're right. They're nice everywhere. Did they have them over here?

This somebody gave to me at the comedy show. Was it a chocolate or was it a full fucking mushroom? It was a full mushroom. Caps, the whole fucking mushroom. fucking thing. You gave you a fucking Shataki. Yeah. It happens from time to time.

They weren't grown... They weren't grown... They weren't grown in real cow shit. They didn't taste like Portobello. They were growing like puppy shit. That's what they were growing and stuff like that. Now, how many shows do you have on Vicerland? Man, you know, I think right now I'm at four.

Jesus Christ. Yeah, right now I'm trying to do as many fucking shows as possible. I have a lot of ideas, man. I can't let these ideas just go to waste You're an idea man I just have my Nonstop nonstop what's your favorite one Right now my favorite one is

You know obviously fuck that's delicious It's my favorite thing in the world Because I get to travel Eat ridiculous foods Chill with my friends And that's the show That's what we do for a living Now you go all around the world

With that? Every fucking way Or just the United States No Everywhere We did two seasons of going around the world And now this next This third season coming up.

We're about to do it New York Centric. We're going to do 10 episodes, Tri-state area. Show motherfuckers you could go to Greece without going to Greece. Just go to Astoria. You know? Go to fucking Chinatown. You want to go to fucking Laos?

We're going to go to Jackson Heights. I'll take you to fucking Laos. Mad Loations. There are so many different things all over the fucking place. You know what? I mean? That's like the fight. Brooklyn

is the fourth largest, whatever. Go to the Russians over there. But they got every fucking food. Like they break it down with science up in Brooklyn. Like provinces. For sure. You know, like provinces are certain things. You know, so it's pretty interesting now.

Like I've been gone from New York for 20 years. I can't imagine what all those areas where I used to go to cop that people tell me They pay $2,000 for a fucking box bedroom up there. So where, tell me some of your favorite places to cop. East New York? What I was growing up. Yeah. Okay, I started.

You start in, uh, there was a church in the village. This was the late 70s. And then I just stayed in Jersey and bought weed. And then the hot, hot spot from like 82 to 85. was anywhere from 178 to 125th Amsterdam, right in Manhattan. I mean, that's a fucking hotspot right now for some of the best shit. That was the fucking hotspot. I mean...

Washington Heights has some of the best weed in the world. Washington Heights was the hot spot. They got this shit, man. It's called Hayes. It's called Pude. It's a special type of fucking weed. You only get this weed in Washington Heights. I've never seen it anywhere else.

No one could tell me what weed it is No one could tell me where it came from No one could tell me why who fucking else has it Only these fucking Dominicans With curly hair They got the shit They got that fuck The curly hair fucking

Fucking screaming playing baseball I love it They got the best weed And then Webster Avenue in the Bronx That's a pretty fucking heavy duty place And Jerome Avenue in the Bronx. Oh, yeah.

It came. So to counterpart each other. Now, I'm talking about 1990, to counterpart each other. Webster or one of those streets, I may be wrong, but one of them said, fuck it. If you come to our spots on Wednesday, you buy a bag, we'll give you a joint. And that got out. So fucking white kids, four in every car coming over from all five fucking.

and Rich Burrows to buy weed because that, bro, those are the hot spots to buy wheat. That's a big deal. That's a big deal. That's a big deal. The special is a big deal. The special, you know.

When I left New York, there was two types of weed. There was green weed and there was Buddha. That's it. That's it. And then some spots mixed them. And they called it the master mix. And then we would go to Staten Island. There was a spot in Staten Island.

That was all Italians, but that got too crazy. You thought you were going over to buy a machine gun. You know what I'm saying? You thought you were going to buy a machine gun. Sit over there, park over there. We'll be right old. What the fuck is this shit?

For a fucking bag of weed. Sick fuck. But then there's the flip side of that where I used to get Coke. And those were the, there was a spot in Brooklyn that I could go over and buy up to, you know, four ounces of Coke cash, 24 hours a day. from they were there from like 84 to fucking i left in 93 i went back in 93 for a year and they were

still there but the hot hot hot spot for cocaine was Washington heights and it was right when you went right over the bridge as soon as you got over the bridge you didn't have to do dick you have to do dick you just pulled to that light you made the left and then you shot down you made another left down the street, you pulled in, you went upstairs, you sat down, they had two bags, 25 and 35. They gave you a line of each, boom, and you went back in your car. If you went back over the George Washington Bridge, you should be shot hung, and they should shoot your mother in the head for being a dumb fuck for having you, because that's basic

101. You don't do that. What you do is you take that car, you hide that cocaine, and you go down Broadway a little been there used to be a Cuban spot on about 175th up from the hospital there. You park right out there and you go get a little Cuban meal. You eat the Cuban food. You get on the west side highway. You shoot down and you go across the Lincoln Tunnel and nobody says two words here and you got a fucking meal.

All right, you don't have $10 for the fucking for the Cuban meal. Stop and get a hot dog, but still take the Lincoln Tunnel. You know what I'm saying? It's one of the most underrated things is the fucking meal after the drug copy. Nobody understands that. That's the whole part of the fucking thing. It's the whole thing. It's the joy.

It's the victory. Even if you go buy a bag of heroin, let's say you're a heroin type of dude, because I had a brother that was a heroin type of dude. He'd go into those neighborhoods, but he went with the intention of eating something. That would fuel the heroin high. So he would go, skin pop,

and make sure it was good. He'd go into his favorite fucking Greek restaurant, get 22 Malacca sandwiches, and right in the bathroom. him blast off. He even fucking told me he wanted to get like write a book about, listen to this, this is in the 80s, this motherfucker

told me this. He looked me in the eye one day, high on heroin, he goes, listen, man, I got an idea for a book. I go, what is it? He goes, what if I wrote a book about all the best diners where you could shoot heroin and nobody will bother you? Legend. He had it all the way up to

Coney Island. Because that's how crazy those heroin dudes go. They go crazy. But he had a whole, he had a job. He was a, what do you call those people, a functioning heroin guy? But he would go up and down that fucking thing and tell me what places he would go eat, order a meal like a gentleman, and he'd go in a bathroom, blast off, walk out, fucking light his t-shirt on fire.

But that was it. When I left New York, Washington Heights, the last summer I was in New York, The Dominicans were running shit so heavy up there that they had thrown a fucking bucket of spackle from the fourth, from the roof of a building or the building inspector. Because he tried to bust into these Dominicans. What's the movie of Wesley Snipes?

When he takes over the building in the 80s? New Jack City. New Jack City. Like four Dominicans took over like a fucking two-bedroom apartment. Holy shit. I swear to God. And they had a lookout up on the roof. and the building inspector came

and they drew a bucket of spackle out of and that was there and that set off like a fucking wall and that was it and then I moved to Colorado and got into comedy I got a good fucking operation going on up there and a lot of lookouts a lot of whistling going on you know but I heard that New York is completely different now

like it's not the way like I mean a very similar it's still I could still get a machine going to four in the morning sure no one million percent you're kidding me you get a fucking M16 right now. You get an M6T right two blocks away from my house.

And four in the fucking morning. Four in the morning. They got fucking 25 M16s. They are whatever you want in the projects over there. That is crazy shit. They got fucking guns I've never seen before. They got fucking German guns that you fucking James Bond was using in Golden Eye. You know the little fucking Ruger,

the little fucking fancy one? Who is this? Imagine getting shot. with that? Like yo, fucking creed getting shot with a fucking vintage German gun? In the projects. At the hardest place to smoke and join this country, number one place is New York

City. I just fucking light up on the street. You don't give a fuck. I don't give a fuck. I don't give a fuck either anymore. What are they going to do, man? I'm just curious. I'm not sure. What are they going to fucking do? They're going to come up to you and they're going to do? What are they going to say?

Put it out? No? I'm... I don't know. I just fucking do things until someone asks me to stop nicely. And then I'll figure it out. I feel the same fucking...

I'll figure it out after that. Even in San Francisco, I spark fucking wherever the fuck. I don't give a fuck. People are adults. You know what time it is. You know what time is. This is the street.

You shouldn't be down there anyway, 10 o'clock in night. You know, there's a bad fucking neighborhood. I'm true. I can't do it no more. You know, like, I'm too old, man, to fuck around with it. I hide it from, you know, I'll smoke outside from my kid. You know what I'm saying?

I won't smoke in the fucking house. Nothing like that. We're still respectful for that, man. No, you have to. You can't fucking smoke in front of the kid. I feel like you can't do that. It's just ridiculous. But then again, they see you on TV doing it.

What the fuck is a difference? Well, eventually. I can't fucking... Eventually some days I'm going to see. I don't know when. I'll try to fucking tap out those YouTube things and shit like that. So you still dig the cooking? I love fucking cooking.

It's one of my favorite things to do. I get inspired when I go to these different countries and places. I get totally inspired to do things and fucking make things and invent things. That's just an edge I got over a lot of people and whatever we do. I really did this for many years. It's a unique thing. Thank you very much. This is my origin.

I love instant gratification. I love instinct. I love to fucking make something for somebody presented to them. And then watch the happiness on their face. You know? I don't like it when they don't like it. I like it when they like it. So I try and make it bad.

It's from the heart. Now, when you make chicken palm, that's from the fucking heart. I can tell when you were talking about it. That's totally from the fucking heart, man. I just... What makes your chicken palm fucking superb? I want to see Lee's face turned purple. The fucking care that I put into this chicken palm,

I pound it down so fucking thin in every aspect that you're going to get a crunch on every corner. That's what I like. That's the most important part. Okay. So then I make a two minutes to... A two-minute tomato sauce. Just fry up some fucking garlic. Put some dried chili in there in the oil.

Canna puree tomatoes. It's over. Salt. That's it. Let it rock. Just let it sit there. No pepper? No.

It doesn't need it at this point. No pepper at this point. Then you take the fucking Pollyo-Mutzerola cheese, which is a big deal. Polyo whole milk because it melts perfectly. No other cheese melts perfectly. I don't know any other cheese but this They sell it in string Cheese applications

They sell it in logs Bricks Whatever you want it's fucking tremendous So you cover the whole Fucking thing you can Put sauce on it real nice Cover the whole fucking thing with the cheese Even the areas where there's no chicken

You put cheese You know Just so you get a full blanket A full quilt Of cheese And then you stick that motherfucker under the salamander. So it heats from the top also.

And you get all those brown crunchy bits and the cheese is melted like fucking it's just fucking gorgeous. You lift it up and it's just elastic cheese up and down. You fucking bring it to your mouth. You have to fucking hold the cheese here

and rip it a little bit, you know? You know when you have to rip the cheese a little bit because it's too much? And you fucking wrap it around? It's phenomenal It's all about the crunch Absolutely It's all about the crunch

On those little corners, man It's just to Just to remind you that this was a fried chicken You have a restaurant now? I don't But my, you know, the world is my restaurant I cook everywhere I can

The world is my restaurant Have you ever cooked Not high, not stoned? I'm sure Really? It seems like fun I like listening to fucking salsa while I'm doing my thing

while I'm cooking. Specifically Frankie Ruiz. One of my favorites. There's nothing like listening to a good Latin beat while fucking cooking. It makes you cook better. You know what I mean? It makes me cook better. It's a rhythm. It's a rhythm. It's a fucking afro rhythm with Latin flair that you just can't get anywhere else. It's just something else, man.

They don't make salsa music like they do in Puerto Rico and in Cuban. Let's fucking talk about the Cuban fucking the Winnervis, the social club. My man, Ibrahim Ferrer, phenomenal. Phenomenal. Fucking ridiculous. R.I.P. You know what's crazy? I look at you, and it's like you have your ethnic roots, but you took advantage.

in New York City to the max, you took a little bit from every little ethnicity, you enjoy every fucking flavor, and that's the beauty of coming from that area. Straight up. You know, like, that's like, when I first moved to New York

from Cuba, I used to have a beef every day with Rudy the Haitian, right? This little black dude, Rudy the Haitian. I mean, I think about it years later. When I was in the third grade, I used to have beef with Rudy the Haitian. Who, oh, fucking Rudy of the Haitian? I mean, you know, you

and you pick up this certain flavor. You get to meet Jewish kids and you talk to them for a while. And let's pretend like you go play tennis with them. And they don't get high, but that's good. You can just go play tennis with them. Yeah. But on the weekends, you play hoops

with a bunch of Puerto Rican dudes who get high and they carry knives and shit. Some other shit. But then on Sundays, you're fucking, while you're hanging out with your girlfriend's family and they're fucking Russian. Mm-hmm. And you get this.

labor, you grew up with this certain knowledge. Like, for me, it was like Greek, Italian, you know. Greek, Italian, for sure. That's a queen's specialty right there. Yeah, you know, Greek, Italian, fucking Puerto Rican. Fucking, my uncle, my uncle was the super of the building that Christopher Walker grew up in in Astoria. His fucking parents lived in the building. You know, like, we used to walk to Steinway Street.

I had fucking Jamaica Avenue five minutes from me I had flushing Main Street where all the Asians were right near me and I had fucking Forest Hills where it was like a nice weird enclave of like fucking ethnicities and like the older Jews and young people there's a lot of weird shit going on there like a little bit of a fucking Queens nightlife I just see a lot of shit man you see

I remember fucking one of the first people that introduced me to like loving to be in the kitchen is a is a fucking man from Ecuador named Rigoberto

you know I used to work for my pops in the restaurant used to call me a little fat fuck I loved it he was like you make me giggle you little fat piece of shit ha ha ha ha he was funny

you look gordito you little motherfucker you fat fuck and then I would see him chopping up the fucking the fucking parsley He's like, yeah, a little poikito de marijuana, pocita maruana.

Like, I'm fucking six years old. So I'm like, giggling and shit. I love that. I love, I, I, when you chill in the fucking kitchen with Mexicans, you start hating, like, your own people. Like, they start talking shit to you about fucking white people and so, fuck, it's true. You start hating yourself. Fuck me. Well, you're very interesting.

You're a very interesting dude in that facet that I could tell that you took. Queens, man. Queens made me. That's what this is. Queens is the epicenter of all this shit. It's very, very, very eclectic. I think that the last time they did some sort

of study, they found out that there's more ethnicities in the borough of Queens that there is anywhere else in this world. I fucking blew my mind. That's crazy. I always thought it was Brooklyn.

I'm good. I always thought it was... I always thought it was fucking Brooklyn. No, man. Brooklyn became fucking... It's fucking crazy in Brooklyn now. Fuck, everyone's from Ohio or fucking... fucking...

I don't even know. The thing about you that I see, that he could... His restaurant would be so off the hook because you wouldn't know what you were really going to get that night. That's why I fucking love you, man You really

You get me He would wake up in the morning And go, you know what, bro? I feel like a fucking fish Greek style Absolutely And then, you know But these employees are like

But wait a second You know, Mr. Bronson It should be This is a this theme restaurant That's why it would be hard You wouldn't know What you were going to cook Till that day

You might come in and want Two eggs with bacon that's not on the menu. No fucking chance. It's a Spanish for titata with asparagus and goat cheese and mozzarella fucking baked all over it

with a little sauce. Yeah, I fucking hate goat cheese. I mean too. Oh me, listen, I don't even like to look at. It fucking makes me fucking decide. I love a lot of things in this world, but goat cheese that shit fucking tastes like straight.

You know what you said something? You said something. I don't give a fucking people. People get fucked. People get pissed if we go there. When you said polio cheese, I almost stopped because they have it out here. Do they? I think they do.

I talk to some people out here and they never fucking, I was like, yo. No, no, no, no. You know about palo cheese in L.A.? No, no, no. What? Hotel bar, brother. Oh, come on. Shit.

It's fucking sitting in my freezer right now. My mother freezer. With a stick of hard Italian bread back in the old days from the Bronx or something, you go home, you get that whole stick of fucking hotel bar butter. Before they did this is when Salted or unsolting? Oh, assaulted like a motherfucker Salted.

If you're walking on ice you might as well dance. If you're gonna kill that art, kill that heart with fucking style. Oh my God, I would fucking kill. I didn't like the, I liked the hotel bar. Like I would get the bar. That's how old school that was.

You got to get the ball. And I get the Italian bread and I cut and just put fucking butter on it. From the age of maybe 10 to like 13, I did this. And one day somebody's like,

dog, you know how bad that is for you? Doesn't matter. Life is literally about bread. And I would eat the guts. But nobody would eat, I would eat those fucking guts. I would heat them up with butter and let the butter melt into the guts.

Fucking delicious. Fucking delicious. Unbelievable. That's phenomenal stuff, man. Letting butter melt into bread in any facet, any capacity, where it's at.

You let that fucking bagel sit with the butter for just a little bit. You don't eat it right away. You get every bite soaked and it's the salty soakness. It's something special. Even the most simplest

fucking meathead thing could be fucking mind-blowing, you know? Like bagel and butter. If you fucking toast that bagel right and you let that butter sit on the bagel just enough that's 52 stars 52

motherfucking stars Michelin New York Times wherever you want to fucking do 50 best restaurants in the world just give me a bagel with butter I'm a simple man It can work with a lot but what's your

favorite kind of bagel My favorite bagel is from Utopia bagels and Queens Utopia bagels and Queens and fucking Bayside They do a bagel that has a hard crunch on and it's still fluffy

in the middle, which I really enjoy. And my favorite one happens to be a sesame. When you toast that sesame, it's like you're putting pussy on my mouth. What do you put on it? Butter or cream cheese? I don't, see, they put too much cream cheese.

They fucking put... I have an issue with New York City fucking bagelries. They put weight, they put a thick fucking thing of cream cheese. Then you go to open, it's all over your face. It's all over. They don't even give you enough. It doesn't taste good.

It doesn't. You need a little, a thin layer of it. I like to go with the butter soaked in. Or I get one slice of mustard out. See, when I go to a restaurant for breakfast and they give me toast with two pieces of butter next to it, I want to hit them in the fucking head with it. You put the, it's a fucking... It's logic.

You gotta put the fucking butter on the toast and it comes to you in the middle. They don't know that. The fucking middle is all buttery? I got to get the fucking butter and open it and pound it with a knife. It's fucking. It sticks with your fingers. It's rock hard. It's rock hard. You can't fucking smear it.

You know, that shit drives me crazy. But what are you going to do? This is America today. That's what they do. I remember being a kid and going to the Bronx and getting a corn muffin, and they cut it in half and soak it in butter and put it on the motherfucking grill. On a griddle? God damn!

Shouts to that every short-order cook in the fucking city, man. Let me add you. You ever eat my fucking grandfather. We used to go to a fucking grandfather. fucking restaurants. She used to make my mother take the fucking bread. He would make my mother open her pocketbook. She put the fucking bread, put the butter

in the bag, take the napkins, take the ketchup. We did have... Everything. Everything came from elsewhere. Coffee lids. The coffee things that you put on the coffee to hold it where it gets too hot. You took the sleeves? The sleeves.

She fucking had... We had trays from McDonald's. You took trays. Yeah, I was like, my grandfather would eat his fucking Lenders bagel because he was in West Palm Beach. He still needed his bagel. Lenders, it's a disgusting bagel, but it works. Lenders fucking bagel. A little bit of Philadelphia cream cheese on a McDonald's tray.

Listen, man, all those bagels, these little bagel, like, no is bagels. When you're in a fucking rush and you're at an airport at 7 in the morning, you smoked 82 joints the night before. No his bagels works It works You just got to coach him You gotta get cream cheese with turkey And a slice of tomatoes Oh that's a nice one

Oh my god A little turkey That's nice I love the turkey A little turkey A little poppy seed Oh I'll see poppy seed is another Underrated bagels

My favorite Toch me a poppy seed The only problem with it is It gets in your teeth You have to brush your teeth But that's the whole point of it That's what you want That's what you want

I like picking my teeth I look forward to picking my teeth I fucking I could fucking work wonders with this corner right here Give me a fucking thing From the cigarette Give me anything

So with a little fucking thing And I'm digging in You're gonna put some Tony Bennett on He's just gonna sit there, dog I'm fucking trying to put it. It's that type of fucking night Ladies and gentlemen Action Bronson in the house

Rolling joints like a fucking It's like a cartel member I want to be around Huh To pick up the pieces when somebody breaks your heart. This one I'm flogged, this makes me think of my grandpops, man. I fucking love this shit. Somebody twice as smart as I...

A somebody who will swear to be true... I need another star. You know what? Give me another fucking peanut butter also. Who'll leave you to learn? Thank you. Those fucking stars are delicious. They're really good, man.

They take it to a certain place. Look at Lee. like 19 of them today. Those mushrooms are fucking Fugazis, Lee. Those fucking mushrooms are Fagasy. I'm disappointed. I'm sorry.

We've been getting good mushrooms the last couple times. There's one dude that shows up to the shows. He grinds them up and puts him up and puts some T.HC chocolate. They take you to a different level. Now you're fucking getting to the point where you can't even open your

fucking mouth. Like, you're, ah, ah, ha. No, I still function. Okay, because I like taking the mushrooms from like my fucking face is paralyzed you know I can't go home high no I listen I cannot walk in my house

I can walk in my house phone no I can't walk in the house you fucking have like I like watching the nature channel that's one of those fucking things on last time I was on fucking mushrooms I was with my girl and we were watching the fucking the goats you know those fucking Goats that climb up the mountain

And then they cut to a close-up Of this fucking goat's face I almost fucking lost my mind I lost my fucking mind I fucking jumped off the couch It was out of my face It was amazing Why do you watch scary things when you're high

That's not scary I guess It wasn't scary I just didn't know that they were gonna cut To a close-up of a fucking goat On the mountain his face looked so crazy You can see every crevasse you can see every fucking vein pulsating. Can you imagine being stoned and just seeing a goat on the mountain as you're driving by? Well, that's what I mean.

They're fucking tiptoeing on the side of the mountain, you know what I mean? Like, it's really next level. Just watch out for the cameras. You know, it's fucking nuts. You have like 10 shows on fucking violent. Weelin, what is it? Vice. That's a story.

Weissland. Iceland. Oh my God. And they're all we, what the fuck? You have a show called Fuck. I mean, this is where we're going. It's 2000. That's why I love Iceland.

Because they fucking take, they're living in today's world. At least they're trying to live in a motherfucker than today's world. They are, man. I think that these are the only people that, you know, that would take that chance of naming a show. Fuck. You know, they allow me to name it what I want to name it. So when they went with it, motherfuckers love that shit. They love Scream.

What's the first thing you say when you fucking say something good? Oh, fuck. At least I do. Me too. Either fuck or shit. For some reason, you equate shit with being disgusting, but shit sometimes is amazing. Depends.

Exactly. It really depends. It depends. Depends the situation. Now, you know, I got a call one day. And they said, hey, man, we're interested in you doing hot ones. And I said, what is it? And they said, it's a show about,

people going to eat hot wings and I didn't I didn't know what to think I turned it on and I saw what's his name he wouldn't eat him and then I saw I turned yours on

and it was very interesting you had a friend down there big body but the most interesting fucking thing that I knew why I would love you was because that you

he wanted to ask you about I'm sorry, the TV chefs, the chefs or something like that, and he responded, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, before you even ask me, this Japanese dude better be number one on that fucking list. And he was, like, he, you know, and you started dropping names of different chefs that you like. Some of that had heard, you know, the Mario Batole,

he's the popular ones, and some that didn't even know fucking existed. Who's your favorite chef? Who was the Asian gentleman? This is someone that inspired me. It was a show called Yan Cancook. You ever seen that shit back in the day? It was on PBS. It's a fucking guy, a big smile.

Just always teaching fucking Americans how to make Chinese food very, like, gently. He was amazing. Like one of my earliest memories, I don't fucking know why I like it. It's ridiculous. I like crazy shit. I love fucking Yan Cancook. That's why he was. is your favorite chef.

Yeah, nah, you know, I just, he's on some next level shit, man. You know, he's on some fucking... And all he would teach people is how to cook Chinese food. That's it. Easy ways to cook Chinese fucking food. Easy, easy, easy, easy.

I love Jacques Pepin also, because in the kitchen where I worked, we had a little fucking TV. We'd watch soccer. I'd watch baseball. I'd watch the fucking novellas. There'd be one that we always watch. all the time and the fucking El Tiburon.

You know that one? No. They fight and the fucking guy told me is one of the Mexican actors that he's like 70 years old but he got the fucking cock where you pumped the ball you know so that's how we identified him. He has the cock who pumps the ball.

We have to pump the ball to fucking get hard. But that's where we used to watch PBS when I did brunch. You know I would work brunch. I'd come in. at 10 a.m. Fucking Martin Yan, Jacques Pepin,

would be on all day. Then the infomercial for the golden for the golden oldies, you know? You know, when they have the revival fucking things and they sell the fucking compilation. They put on like a second of each song.

Yeah, it's the same people. It's crazy, man. It's amazing. And that's how you go. You know, I didn't get into cooking shows till later. Yeah, yes, I guess that's what I was. The first guy that I got, that you know,

the only reason why you stop and watch the cooking show is because you're either a fat fuck or you're stoned or you're both. Right? When you're both, you say, fuck it. Let me watch what this motherfucker's whipping up. And it was the Italian guy who really did great because he even got NBC to give him a fucking sitcom that dude. What was his name?

Rocco de Spirito, are you talking about? No, no, no. Are you talking about Battali? No, no, not. Mr. Battali. The fucking Italian dude. Kind of lost his

hair. They gave him a show on NBC a fucking sitcom. That's how popular he got. This is 98, 97.

An Italian dude? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You said he was one of your that you liked him. Chef something. But then you spoke about like the one I always watch and I was always interested in him

because we're sort of from the same neighborhood is no reservations. Bourdain. You know, and he's the man. It was very interesting what you said how he mixed both worlds. That's the kind of show I would like to do.

Man, he's a fucking... Plus the weed, going to cop the weed in the illegal neighborhood. Man, that's what the fuck we do. That's the show. I've been on TV going uptown. My cousin jumped out, bought 40 dimes of fucking haze

from uptown. He pulls it out of his nuts. he's on mushrooms We're in the fucking back of the Uber We stop Right before we get back onto the highway Because we already have the joint roll We already have the blunt rolled

We already have the blunt rolled We stop right there at the truck It's called La China It's the Cucci Frito truck The Frituras So everything is fried over They get the fucking orreja They got the Lengua

They got Cabeza going down They got whatever you want But they got one Dominican Specialty called Chimi Jimmy Churie It's like a fucking Like a Pounded patty like a burger type of thing

Flavored with oregano Garlic That sasson Choped cabbage Mayo ketchup on it On a toasted roll It's like fucking It's like insane man

That's the ritual Every time you go uptown to Capays You smoke on the way to get the shit For sure on the FD you can take the FDR because that's the freeway FDR boom right there 172 make the left then you go get your shit

come back roll it up get the Chimie back on the highway same way Grand Central now because they don't have the fucking tolls in place you good to go back home we used to do the smoking tour this was one of my favorite things in life to do is going on a tour. I go on a fucking tour

of New York City smoking as many blunts as we can, never having to get off the highway. Circling. Going through Brooklyn, going through Queens, going through Brooklyn, going through Queens, going through Brooklyn. It's all good. See sights,

it's beautiful. You get all fucking Brighton Beach. Go get some fucking Russian food. Go to the bathhouse, let them hit you with a fucking tree in the back. You know? Let me tell you something. When I first came out of here, the medical marijuana thing was starting to grow. You know, it dawned on me one there.

I'm like, wait a second. The motherfuckers like me, half the high is going to cop it and going back. That was for me. That was in my, the way I was raised. That's how I liked it. Yeah, there was a dude in the neighborhood. No, no, no. My throat's already fucked up from the six shows.

I still have to finish this one. Thank you. In fucking San Francisco all weekend. But you were in Jersey. You had a local dude. He was going to the city to get it too. So one day you said, fuck it. What am I doing in my life anyway?

Get that she's. I'm going to go get it myself. And in the meantime, you know what? While you're waiting, you saw a Sabret hot dog. But he also made, he made those little steaks. Little kebabs. And he gives you a white bread, a piece of white bread. On top of this shit.

Come on top of this shit. Come on. Yeah, with Franks hot sauce and shit. Motherfuckers don't know about that. That's in my book, man. That's, I put that shit in my book. Oh, my God. I put the fucking bread on the top of the thing.

That's one of my nuances, man. Oh, my God. You know, you get the fucking kebob, and then they put the piece of Italian bread on the top of the stick, and you walk away. $2. You get two, some lemon on it. $2 a piece? I would, Lee, I would eat four, five of them, $2 a piece. Oh, my God.

And then the guy would maybe give me an extra piece of bread and shit. Maybe if I was a good boy, he'd give me a piece of bread. It was those, those were the things that made you cop, the adventure. You were doing by yourself, or I would take Lee with me. You know, you never just went into the city of Lee and bought a bag of reefer and ran back. You always went to somewhere to eat. There was a Carvel close to the, to the bridge. would say we would go get Cuban food

and then walk to the Carvel and on the walk to the Carvel we'd smoke a joint. Walk to the Carvel, get a black and white shake or a chocolate shake or a double comb. Now we're talking expert level shit. Double comb, vanilla sprinkles with color with colored sprinkles and whipped cream.

And then we go to a movie theater on the corner there at 181 in Broadway. There used to be like a triple feature. You turned it into an adventure copy. I could never even dream with just going into a store getting three joint and driving home. The whole thing was driving back

with the weed in the trunk going you know like bro lower or smoking the whole way. Take a chance Columbus did. Fucking let's go. That was part of the high was driving back with that half ounce under your seat

thinking about that fucking chicken parmesan you're going to make and shit that's at the house already. Your girlfriend's watching. Watching the sauce and shit. Like Paulie, what's his name? Like, what's his name? And Goofellas, he told the girl to watch the sauce.

You're just going out around the corner. That's what it was. Now, I like this concept. Like, I like this concept of, I got two places where I cop. And 10 in the morning, I know they both open. You get introduced to the world of leads. He's out of his mother right now? Yeah, yeah, he's done.

He's done. You know, I was just laughing. Because he knows. He knows I'm a professional. The weed store opens at 10. I'm there at 10.01, bothering the Hindu. Didn't know what? He said it at 955.

You think I'm fucking kidding you. I want to be the first customer the day. I don't want no misunderstanding. And these motherfuckers are all soft. They get to work late, so I fuck them all up. The one place, they're on point. The Russians, they're on point, Jack. They get that a quarter of ten of the attention.

They got those hot girls working in there. So sometimes I dip over there. That's Sunset Herbal. But yeah, I go there at 5, 10 in the morning. I don't want no fucking drama. You just drive over now and go in. There's nowhere to stop. There's no journey.

My favorite thing about living in New York City was that, you know what, pro? You know what, action, dog? I got to do some shit tomorrow at 9 in the morning. And you do too. Don't you? You're like, yeah, me too. What about I swing by the house and by a quarter of a fucking eight? we smoke a joint

and we swing by the Bronx get a slice and go to that Carvel next to and I'll have you home by fucking 915 that is my world we don't nobody we've got nowhere to go out here then we gotta go to Huntington Beach

to get a fucking milkshake or something like that takes two fucking hours there and 19 hours back by the time you get back you don't even want to get high no more you're like done I'm done that was my thing

thing when I lived on the East Coast was let's take it right over there smoke a joint on the way there, eat something, and then you got that after fucking dinner joint, which means you go home early and go to sleep, not be no-lo time. Nobody bothers you, you know what I'm saying?

Just smoke fucking... That's it. There has to be like non-stop smoking whenever we'd hang out, non-stop smoking with the boys. Talking about the thrill of the cop we cop

From as many different people as possible You know what I mean The good stuff Sometimes we go smoke in the hall house You know what I mean While the girls are working Sometimes you know Things would happen

In the hall house I know Lee wants to ask you But I'm gonna ask you Where's the whore house at? Fuck there's so many hall houses There used to be the $30 hollas still I don't know anymore but they used to be $30 hollas $40 hollas like crazy shit all over the place

$40 dollar holler $40 around the world She'll take it up the fucking fucking Whatever you want $40 but she she'll stop you like real like It was a wild thing It was a wild scene How much did you tip? I don't know man It was the you know like I just hung out and smoked

Jesus Christ You don't want to fuck one of those girls Niasseley You'll be at the doctor every day For a year knowing you What about the $30 one? You'll have fucking corn pudding All over your fucking fucking bullsack

Oh my man Wait Look at him He's dying Did you go to the $30 one When it's like You engross? I went to the $26 one also

That was the discounted one Oh Doug when I was growing up There was a 1040 club It was $10. It was $9.99 for tax. 10.40.

And they still have it, supposedly. It's not $10.40 anymore. They just kept the fucking name and shit. 26. Bro, when I was a kid, when I was 13, there was these two fucking brothers that went into the city. Every weekend and got their dick suck like $12. $12.

And these two dudes, these two dudes were young. They had to have change all the time, because no one has the ones. They all had five. This guy, it was 19. It had to be like 1976.

And these dudes were young. If I was 13, the one brother was 13 and the other guy was like 12, but he didn't have it all together. He would do whatever the brother would tell him and shit.

And every Monday at school, they would have a story of where they'd go. They would leave on Saturday mornings by themselves. To get hookers? To go into the Bronx or Queens or they would go to these spots

and for $10, the chicks would take them in the back and wash their dick with a bucket and suck their dick and lick their balls. They would come back with a thousand stories. The thing is that, you know, I would definitely pay to get my dick washed with the bucket. Like that's, fuck, that seems like a nice

amenity. Yeah, but it's a dirty bucket. No, not. We don't want to Scuzz bucket. What I was going to say is that one of my favorite things in life is the nuance of how someone explains when someone is a little fucking mental. You said he doesn't have it all together. You know, there's just a lot of ways that you can say it that's very comical.

Doug, he what? Listen, if you want me to say the truth, he was half retarded, but I don't want to say that on the air. No, but that's what I mean. So, yeah, he didn't have it all together. They were Cubans. They just love it. They were Cubans.

Their name was Juan and Alberto Ali. Juan was the brand of the operation. Alberto was very like shy, like Rocky's wife type shy. Like, yeah, boss, whenever you're saying, like that type shy, like that. And they would come back on Mondays and just drop knowledge on us. And our fucking jaws would drop. We were barely getting tithes. These guys were going deep in the jungle of sex, getting their doth.

getting their dick sucked and washed and they were telling us that they're the first person who told him about around the world when he was 13 he goes for $15 to giving around the world and I'm like, what the fuck are you talking about? Can you explain something? Go ahead, Doug.

I used to have sex with my girlfriend laying on our sides for some reason. It was fucking terrible. When I was in fucking early in high school, we used to lay on our sides for some reason so I didn't wake anyone up. It was terrible sex. Oh no, that's how you do when you're young.

I know, but then you fucking, no one's home, you start going nuts, but the laying on the side sex was wild. But you figure it out. It's like giving somebody a stabbing at the beach. Yeah, no, you have to, after a while, you figure it out. We're going to say, Lee.

I'm sorry. I was just confused about the dick washing. Are you saying like there's no hand job or anything? They just wash your dick? They wash your dick erotically. they take it to a bucket or they get hot water with a sponge and put soap on it

and they stretch it out for you and they wash your balls and shit and then they dry it off you and then they put a condom on it and they fucking suck your horn okay it might be a fucking used condom you never know

they might be saving money you don't know they got them hanging upside down in the back and shit like fucking photos I think it's a fucking black In the dark room I hope they don't reuse condom

They're so cheap You got to one of those fucking condom You got a wretched You got You got And she thinks If she looks at you, she goes, I think this one will fit.

You're fucked, dog. Oh, my God. I didn't know those things are still even existing anymore. What? Can I ask you, Bronson, can you get dumplings? Is it okay to get, like, meat dumplings?

Or they can't? Can you believe these shit? He always says all dumplings are cat dumplings. And I can't live in a world. Is it okay to get dumplings? Is it okay to get dumplings? Where? Anywhere?

Yeah. Joey says all Chinese. We have another one of these fucking things. Dumplings. I think it's pretty safe to get dumpers in a certain place. I had some fucking tremendous ones today. I had a wonton soup. I had a wonton soup like I had never had a wonton soup before.

Where? At this place that he took me to. What's the name of it? We'll tell you after. Okay. I don't even remember, actually. Because every time I go to Korea town, I get dumplings. He says, look for the strike hats.

There's no strike hats. Because, because, listen to me, listen to me, listen, this is the, let me tell you. So I'm actually, you ever meet a dude on your block that, you know, like, I was telling these people the other day, San Francisco, these poor kids, they got labels. You know, every kid's got a label now. Like, when you meet them, they're like, hi, this is Henry. And then when the kid, go, go on and play. to look you straight in the face. He has ADD and he has, you know, PTSD and all this shit.

Fuck, what was you talking about? Yeah, like, what the fuck? He's the fucking kid in that was this. He's 11 years old. When I grew up, either you were a fucking moron or you were all right. PTSD. Or you were a dumb fuck with heart. He got CTE.

If you grew up in New York City, you grew up with dudes that were dumb fucks, but they had a lot of hard, though. I see, yeah, you had heart. They had heart. My man, oh my God, my man, Phil and Nunesiato. from Queens he was the sweetest dude he didn't have it all together

like you say he's fucking brute strength he could hit a fucking baseball 450 feet but he can't fucking tell you two plus two you know but he's an amazing the fucking hands of rocks he's one of those guys

he's a plumber now he's just a great guy you know those are one of those guys you know you still talk to a lot of guys the neighborhood you grew up with. I see them a lot. What are you laughing about over that Tarzan? He's fucking...

Oh, that star is killing him. Yeah, the star got him. Look at them and shit. We have to put on some pink floor on the next level and shit. Yeah, nice to speak to... Do you want to even another star now? Take one more.

One more. Take one more. Yeah, you look good for. How many did you eat a hole? Trust me, take one more. Yeah, one more is good. Trust me, take one more. Michigan.

What's going on with you over there? I'm good. You on parole? Or do not. towel. One more, Doug. Take one more. One more. Just eat it, man. Just eat it.

Just eat it. Eat it. Eat it. It's vegan. Don't wait by nothing. Eat it. Yo, bro. Were you fucking kidding me right now? Can you fucking eat it, please? It's a star fucking one. Yo, are you kidding? Yeah. No, it's a fucking gummy.

You just nibbled on one of the fucking points of the star. That's how I eat. That's, I don't like the way you're eating the gummy. Please, man. Please, you're freaking me out. out. It's crazy. Please, the way you're eating the gummy

is making me nauseous. Can you please stop? Oh, yeah. I got to give you leave for a month. You'll straighten them out. You don't get it. I would love to have leave for a fucking couple of days. He seems phenomenal. He's phenomenal. But he has, listen, he poisoned

his father. With what? I'm not poisoned my father. With some taco... Slowly? No. He picks the worst restaurants because he doesn't want to listen to people. So he goes on Yelp reviews. And I try to talk to him, but his girlfriend loves Yelp. He loves Yelp.

So before they go on a date, like a week before, they plan it, and they both go on Yelp, and they look at the whole menu from Yelp. And they take what people say, and they go. I honestly... And then he never goes back, so I asked him how it was. I'm disgusted with you. I'm telling you, you have no idea what I got to live with. That's not the only time I go to Russians, but yeah.

But every restaurant is... I do use the help, yeah. One worst in the next. Eat the fucking thing, bro. Eat the whole thing. Bro, eat the whole fucking thing. Lee, do you see the legality? I eat everything.

No, Mark, are you fake chewing? Keep it funky with me. Are you fake chewing? I know the tricks. You're telling me I don't know these tricks? Lee, is this how familiar? Lee fucking does periscopes. No, I don't.

Wait, wait, wait. Wait, wait, wait. He eats a, I can't. I can't. I can't. You know, can I go Instagram live right now? You can do whatever the fuck you want to do? I fucking happen.

Yeah, hold on, I gotta go to the bathroom anyway. How dare you? We'll talk about the fucking. I don't, I can barely cook. It takes me two hours to do a 45 minute of Louiebren. I'm gonna make stars. I've gone through it too. What's up?

I'm sorry. So, Bronson. What's up? Talk about your new album again. Remind the people. Listen to me. We live at the motherfucking, at the fucking Mecca. We at the cathedral right now with my man.

Joey Cocoa Diaz. And what the fuck is your name? Lee what? Syatt. Lee Wang? Syatt. Siott? Yes, sir.

And Lee Syatt. Yo, man. This has been fun. This has been fucking ridiculous. Joey went to go take a fucking Piscopo. You went to go take a Joe Piscopo real quick I don't even have another fucking joint roll man I'm gonna have to fucking set this down

On the fucking weed thing More so I could roll more You've been one of the first people to like hang with Joey On the smoking level Hang with Joey on the smoking level Let me take some of this weed I'll give you more No no I'm good

Those fucking stars are flies Those mushrooms are Pugazi The stars The stars on motherfucking fire Dogg. What the fucking think you're dealing with Uncle Joey here? Cocksuckers

straight from the voodoo lounge Trying to fucking keep it down All hours of the night You got him saying Here Stone to the gills, stars Mushrooms Look at all this fucking

Piper Debt We got the mule The little mule The medium mule We got the flying Jew in the fucking house It's all over, but they're shouting. You understand me?

And it's just Monday night. That's how we kick off the motherfucking week. Yeah, what the football is coming too, huh? That's fucking three weeks away. I'm talking about today, motherfuckers. We're here right now, cock suckers, live and in color. Fuck football. Uncle Joey, action Bronson, slinging dick,

talking about fucking smoking weed, eating food, and how not to get in trouble. That's the best fucking thing. Tune in, you fuck. Don't just sit there. I'm going to give you like five fucking minutes of this shit. You can have five minutes of this. Let's see if you can see both of us here.

No, I did not see both of us. You know, I'm sitting there. I'm sitting there on none. So this guy went from being a chef to being a rapper, right? I'm like, that's a unique thing. And also I'm like, wait a second, people usually go from prison to rap. Or from starving to raping.

So what's the, it was tremendous. I don't fucking know, man. It's just happening. Shit just happens sometimes when it's meant to happen. I don't know. You know, I'm just fucking... You took a chance, brother. You grew.

You know what? Something, a door closed and you opened up another one. Well, they... That's what life is about. That's probably the best way I've ever heard it explain. You've explained it better than, you know, I've talked about that before, but you just fucking broke it down right there. I took a chance.

I fuck, something clicked. You're right. That's what happened. Fuck it. Which is the really American dreams. The American mother-ful. Without even dreaming it, really. You just woke up one morning and said,

well, listen, I like what these guys are doing. I may be able to add something to this. Yep. And all of a sudden, bam. My fucking boy put me on, man. It's really fucking crazy. You know. It's fucking legend.

I'm trying to write this thing right now. I'm thinking how I got into comedy, how. I was locked up, got out, you know. It took me about a year and a half. something made me go down there and then something made me fucking stick it out and you know and here we are 20 something years later

but here we fucking are you know we're not locked up we're fucking with action Bronson Lee Syatt you on a Monday night Detroit Motor City did you eat the stock suck you didn't fake eat it

it's delicious I am I'm telling you man Sam motherfucking I am goodness gracious look at this it's that why did you like lean up. It didn't make you look cooler. Lean back down. Grab your fucking little baby balls.

I'm sorry, yo. He's one of the best fucking dudes ever. I'm sorry for giving you a hard time right now about your baby balls. I know it's from a good place. You know what's happening next. Live from the motherfucking Bronx. Uh-oh. Live from the motherfucking Bronx.

Damn. What was your name on the show? What was your name on the show? Was this green man? What have you wanted to be? This is Mark fucking DeJesus He used to be in the band Called

Trick Red Making the band Yo, he was in one of the best bands ever Come on, man. No, don't me keep it funky? Good. Your man was in, yo

Here's a bronch for you there. Your man was in DLG. You remember DLG? Yo, look DLG up right now. Your man was in DLG. He just lost a little bit of weight. You're the man Oh shit

Oh shit Little old school Bruns free and shit I love you I love you Because that's how we have to do it here On the fucking Monday night You know what I'm saying

Start the fucking week Grab your balls It's all over To shopping motherfuckers Fucking cocoa Bam bam Make peace Peace I love you

Motherfuck It's a beautiful day to be alive Always Oh shit. This is a unique fucking podcast tonight. Let me get some shout out to all I got you here. Fucking Michael Gabbard. Sergio Otega showed up with some boxing gloves.

I've got to mail them. Zach Spravery. Patrick Samoa. Caleb. Angie Matt Martinez. Captain Comeback. Mike Davis. Ricky G.

And what I do. Don't forget Saturday. I'm at the motherfucker night's house. and then the following week I'm at the Ontario Improv so we ain't fucking around you know what I'm saying Number two I'm happy you motherfuckers drove And you didn't go through the nine hour delay

No you know that I had to go up there But you know what man I gotta tell you something I wasn't pissed off at all Like when I got out there The show was canceled I pushed it to Sunday I went to my room I watched my pussy

I rolled the joint I went outside I went for a little walk I got something to eat and shit. I teamed up with Gene Delerey like at midnight

talked to him a little bit they had an espresso machine in the motherfucking coffee every floor I made like a triple espresso at midnight went upstairs smoked another number

ate another star and Law & Order came on I was good to go good to go That's a fucking it's a win You know listen When you're in your house

You got Viceland When you're in a hotel Sometimes this motherfucker fucking wholesale had versus. The fuck is that? Oh, wait, I know that channel. Verses was on for a while, but it became something else. They never changed the logo.

It still had fucking versus on it. I was in shock. They had no HBO and no showtime, but they had something else. I don't know what the fuck they had. Listen, I don't give a fuck. At 8 o'clock, I wasn't on stage anyway, so whatever was on. Stars. Something fucking goofy.

Something goofy and shit. But every night That's what keeps me alive, man There's those lawn orders And you could go into one Like at the 25 minute mark And you already saw it So you know the plot and shit

So that gives you some time To go downstairs to the vending machine And get a couple snacks To hold you off a late night and shit Like some Doritos Or some fucking I always get the menu The next day

Those fucking The cheese nacho The ones are gliming you're stoned And those ones Ones with the nacho chili flavor, what of those? I'll be getting hooked on TV. Fritos. Dog, late night.

I'm hooked on it. I'm hooked on TV. I'm just hooked on TV. Are you really? I know, but I just like, you know, like you say, Law & Order, I used to fucking do CSI like that. I would watch any CSI, Miami, New York, Vegas, fucking Zimbabwe, whatever. I didn't watch New York because I auditioned for her. I went to Perusa.

I went all the way to producers. on that show. And fucking Caruso put the cabasch? No, that was Miami. I'm talking about CSI-U-Y. Oh, fucking Gary Sinise told you no? No, it wasn't Gary Sanis. What is he? You know what happened? Who the fuck was it at that time? Fishburn?

At that time, it was Gary Sanisi. But what happened was they had, the initial pilot had a bigger crew. And they had me working in the thing as like uh you know go get this like a big dummy dude i didn't give a fuck we're in the

fucking lab yeah in the lab no it's not they couldn't be you're not the fucking guy i'm a comedian but even if they would have gave me six episodes that could have been kind of crazy you in the fucking crime lab yeah it's like me actually yo hold on i'm telling you hold the fucking presses this is a show this was a good no idea this is you in a fucking you as a fucking in a crime lab now would be crazy Crazy. I think he'd be fucking ridiculous. It would be

fucking next level like... Like the dude, what's the dude from the odd couple that went on to make a fucking show that he became even more popular for? Something about that. He was an autopsy dude. Not like an autopsy dude. What type

of, like a night guy that works at a place that watches... Like the mortician, like the fucking overnight fucking more guy? That's crazy shit. Well, tell you. telling you. I used to...

No bullshit. I still grew up with a dude who had a funeral parlor. You know, I used to go to the city and pick up the fucking bodies of them from the airport when they were dying in Miami and the whole fucking thing. That's a fucked up job. But if you're looking for a career and you don't want to join the Army,

it's one year. And when you come out, you make $100,000 a year. And after that... Are I driving? No. Fucking... The job. Dressing them up?

A funeral director. The whole thing. You fucking dress them up? The whole thing, cut their fingernails, cold in their hair. I need a little bit more than $100,000 to do that. Let's say you, let's say you, like, the kid I was dear friends with, he, what do you call it, outsourced the whole process.

So we had it out of fucking different? No, no, no. So let's say you died. Had it at a plant? You died, your family came down there, and they said, I don't. We want to view them Thursday through Saturday. On Wednesday night, a guy would come. My fucking arms in them, by the way.

My arms are numb. No, what's that process called? Embalming? They do the whole embalming process. They drain your blood. They break your spine. Oh, God. They fucking, you know, do a bunch of things.

Why don't just put them in the ground like the juice? Because they might pop up during the fucking thing. You can start dancing when Michael Jackson Thriller comes on. That's why you break. You have to do a bunch of things to them guys. I could be wrong. You have to fucking break his back? Like when you're...

Why do you have to break the back? Because they might pop up. Oh, because of the fucking muscle. The rig and mortars. Like in the old school, if you talk to your grandparents, like if you're Dominican, Puerto Rican, Cuban, in those days when you died, they take it to a funeral, no, they put you in a suit

and they put you in the living room for a few days until you started. it's stinking. And people would just come over and start drinking. But from time to time, my hand would pop up. And then when it was time to bury him, dog, three fucking gorillas

couldn't pull the hand down. So they would have to break the fucking arm or saw it in front of it. You saw the fucking thing. In front of the family, there's thousands of thousands. After doing this once, they didn't try to think about it. They were like, how does

everyone else do this? No, they just because you don't know when your head's going to pop up. You don't know. Listen, all I know is that one time, somebody was dead for a few hours. And when the people came to pick up the body, I was there when they picked that person up and put them on the stretcher.

And the last fart came out of their ass as they were getting picked up. Heavy fucking duty. What's that? It's just not. like sewage, like they had died. Like this was it. They were dead. You know what I'm saying? Like, went on, and it wasn't like funny.

Nobody, it was outside. Nobody laughed. We were just there and the person dropped, bro. And all of a sudden we, they tried to resuscitate the person and the person was dead when they picked them up. I was about 19. When they picked them up, you could hear the body

do that last, you know. And it's just, that has to go somewhere. So they got to drain all that. they gotta do a thousand things but pro what they would that do would do like three or four of those bodies a night and about a hundred a body

and it takes like 40 minutes you just go like I said break their spine drain their blood they do a couple other things they stits the eyeballs you know whatever that's why they used to say don't ever mark that on your fucking license

that you want to donate your shit because they won't even let you fucking die They'll cut you up before you're dead. They just didn't know the episode about that with the dude from, What a feeling? Not true of that. What's the name of that movie?

What a feeling? 1984. About the dancing girl. He plays the doctor. Flash dance. He plays the doctor that fucking cut up a woman before she died because he got an internship at a hospital

to make a million dollars a year why they had a show up with a human heart. It's fucking dirty world out there, Lee, Syatt. You know what I'm saying? How you feeling, Lee? See? I couldn't anymore. They don't do that.

Yes, they do. You better take your name off that dog. I don't know. I don't know my name on that list. You never know. One of those fucking people might use it. How are you feeling, my brother? I feel fucking amazing.

I look at you, dog, and I know the guy like you could never live outside of New York City. Yes, come on. Not even in a million fucking years. You fucking know me like the back of my fucking hand there. It's ridiculous. I feel your vibe. Your full 150% It's crazy.

And I'm not even talking about the answer. I have to live five minutes from Queens if I don't live in Queens. I have to live right there on that border or else I'm not happy. You know? I still have to drive through the same neighborhood every day. I still have to take the same route I still have to take the same route every day you know

I feel like I'm just a fucking I'm a product of where I am I don't know I'm like that I'm the fucking things that grow from the fucking ground why are you fucking laughing over there I hope it's because you're looking at a picture

and they're laughing at my fucking metaphors no I'm not listening to me I'm always you're actually not even listening to me or are good fun In the 70s, there was a disco song. There was an old disco song that it used to be, and it was like kind of weird song.

But if you listen to the lyrics, you made a lot of sense. And it was called You're a Native New Yorker. And I remember listening to that. It was just on the idea. I was serious studio 54, so I was listening to it a couple of weeks ago, came on. And it was like me. Like, I could, you know, when I came from Cuba,

that's why I went to school, PS-166. And the whole time, even though my mom had the bar in Union City, New Jersey, my Santa Maria Godmother was on 148th in Broadway. So on my weekends, I spent it up there with fucking kids who live nine to an apartment with a fucking fan. Meanwhile, I was living with my own air conditioner with cable fucking TV, feeling like a fucking savage. But I always kept that New York flavor to me. You know, I left in 84 before the fucking shit really broke out.

But as I was leaving, even one of my favorite weed spots was on 148 between Broadway and Amsterdam. Do you know that in 1983, they already had a punch card, brother? Well, like, get by 12 and get one. By 10, get one free. They used to call their weed the master mix. they mixed the Buddha with the sense and that was their master mix and I'll never forget one day

I went there in June of 85 and I tried to get weed and people like, they ain't no weed you no more it's just straight up crack on this block I was like wow the neighborhood chains that quick that's why you shocked me when you said that you could still get drugs in the city

I've heard fucking people say nah I mean come on you're fucking kidding me but it's still in New York City I don't know who did, I mean, I mean, I don't, like I said, I don't know, but you know what I mean. Come on. You got to be serious. It's fucking New York City, man. It's comical. So what's next for you, my brother? Who fucking knows, man? You're a man of a thousand ideas.

I just, I just keep on. It's non-stopping your head. Then you fucking had this fucking voodoo weed to it. I'm just going to really make your head go off. And add some natural wine to that. I'm really spinning. I'm just fucking spinning all over the place. I just need somebody that's taking notes from things, man. But like you said about the New York City thing,

I feel like that's just, that's what gives me my edge, I feel. Whatever edge I do have. Just that savviness, you know? Just being around all that shit and just being in fucking streets. You have to walk, block. and there's different things around all over the place, different people, different types of schemes going on and different types of players, you know?

It's just so fucking... It's different than growing up in fucking a suburb with lots of houses that are nice and you hear the birds chirping and the dogs running and everyone's just happy. I live in hell right now because in many ways I want my daughter to experience. the same streets I grew up in you know to see what it was like it was just

different times then we live in different in a different fucking world today you know and that's that's something that I always wanted for how to fucking live in New York City for a year or two check it out explore you know the sky's the limit man that's what it is it gives you the idea that the sky's the limit you look at everything in New York and it's like fuck man I could be there too it gives you that boost that sky's the limit and that's how I feel

and you're doing great man appreciate that man now what's the next you have a new album coming out new fucking album when I got a fucking cookbook coming out within the same two weeks August 25th is the album

Blue Chip 7000 the book Fuck That's Delicious an annotated guide to eating well, co-written with Rachel Wharton, an amazing writer. She fucking captured my essence perfectly. Just a hundred things I love in this book.

40 recipes, all kinds of beautiful. You got things from a fucking steak sandwich that you can't really make because I got some of the ingredients from a fucking wine maker in Montefalco Umbria in Italy to fucking Hagandaz

vanilla ice cream with white truffle shaved all over it is fucking crazy shit olive oil to a nice fucking hamburger with truffles and just bacon it's fucking stupid actually

I think about it, wanton soup. Yeah, crispics. You know, like fucking... It's just not wanton soup. It's your flavor. Exactly. This is what I fuck with, man. This is what I fuck with.

I like the wonton soup and it has the pork chopped up in it. The red one, the red pork. You know, the shaw-shoe pork. Right. I went to San Francisco's last week where you guys were at. And we were by house of them, nim. house or whatever

and I went in there I don't even know it's fire huh it's a fucking Thai no it's Chinese Chinese right straight up Chinese

very fucking legendary lying down half the block the whole fucking Oonan now session one probably right I think it was who then Hunan I had garlic beef

I got a dough house of house of hand fucking what's his name sent me the name I walked up there, but anyway, guys, I had but I, you know, I'm a New York City dude, bro. I like the egg roll. I like the

fucking spare rib. I like the egg drop soup. I like that fucking really good. It's not even called war wanton in the East Coast. No, just wanton soup. It's called something else. No, no, no, no. They do it right. Explain it to me. Where I grew up, I was just wonton soup.

It had wontons. It had the slice of beef in it. It had the veggies in it. Yeah, but the problem is, like here, if you go for wanton soup, it's basically four wantons in a chicken Chinese broth that could have came out of a fucking can. When you go to New York, those spots, those oldest spots, it always felt like the broths.

But was made for that soup. Right. Anybody here catch what I'm saying to you? Sorry, say that one more fucking time. Everything felt like it fucking belonged. Oh, yeah. When you get a soup and it's all melds together and it's just harmony, there's really nothing like it. The fucking good, there's, you know, everyone thinks that the, you know, Jew make a good soup or the Spanish make a good soup.

The fucking Chinese, they have a fucking very underrated soup. soup, which is harmonious in all ways. You told me that you're out. Yeah, now you don't want to pick up, Shody? Come on. What's it? Look at the metal. See the fucking metal?

That's something you don't see in the war. Look at those sparrings and shit. That's from my Greek place. Look at that. That's strawberry short thing. It's gorgeous. Look, that's the shit I live for. I'll never get that here, so I got to wait. It's good for me. I don't eat this shit on a constant.

I stay on the healthy side You know what I'm saying? You're right They don't use the metal anymore at the Chinese spot No they don't use metal No more I love the fucking metal

If it has the metal That's how you know They're not fucking around You follow me Now when does your new show come out on Fucking Vice land Vice fucking goddamn land

Oh Fuck that's delicious We're doing some classic shit We're doing the original episodes that were on the internet first you know we're taking a lot of that shit and putting it on television

revamping it doing a little narrative I'm over there I'm taking pisses throw into fucking scenes while I'm taking a piss It's beautiful It's like It's beautiful it's beautiful

So all the FTT Classics come out August 24th On Viceland That's gonna be beautiful 10 episodes You're gonna see the humble beginnings of all of the show You know It's not like it's fucking blown out of proportion

Like we're fucking the Kardashians or some shit But You know people like the fucking thing You gotta keep that shit on Speaking of the internet ones Is there anything you like more than that baklava That baklava your aunt made look just amazing She's an incredible woman

I love her very much I mean, yeah, going all around the world That just must be even Still special Yeah, I mean, you know I ate at the number one restaurant in the world At the time Fucking Italian guy

Massimo Batura And he fucking hand-fed me mad Different things Where was the restaurant located In Modena, in Italy You know, that's where they make Bosomac vinegar They got fucking Maserati

I think it's either Lamborghini or Ferrari They are in for sure Ducati. It's a little fucking ancient town where they fucking slow food and fast cars. You know?

I mean, that was pretty phenomenal to be hand fed by a genius. What do they cook for you? Well, one of the dishes is he did fucking Pan Majano Reggiano, five different ages and five different ways. Which is? He took a young one

and made like a cloud of it. Then he took a little bit older and made a fucking little like cheesecake of it then he took another one and made a sauce of it then he took another one and made a crisp of it then he took another one and made some other I forgot the last one oh and the last bite was he takes a

fucking like a fucking four year old piece and throws it in your mouth at the end it's fucking mind blowing shit it's mind blowing to be able to think about to do these things while he's giving you that you're thinking that he watches fucking hands. This guy scratching nuts before you fed me. At that point, it didn't even give a fuck.

You don't even give a fuck. You don't even give a fuck. I'm sweating. I'm happy. It's like crazy. It's like high. I'm getting high. That was pretty fucking phenomenal.

Actually, you're a pretty fucking interesting dude, man. I fuck what you have. From the music to the heav, uh, the videos to the cooking background to just the refinalis, the city now. running with a Dominican from the Bronx. He's just a solid motherfucker. He's a fucking Dominican Puerto Rican. He's fucking, he's terrible in all ways,

but he's good in a lot of ways too. So he hasn't... It's always good to keep a fucking good Spanish. And you got a dude from Detroit, where you're a little skinny white dude from Detroit. This is a guy from a super bad. Yeah, now he does, but he's a fucking good producer, man. He's really one of the best producers out there.

He's innovated a fucking sound. Sam I am, man. He's an innovator of a specific sound. sound and he's a fucking genius. He literally is a fucking incredible. You wouldn't think this fucking little neurotic fuck is a...

Is there right there on the computer? We could find it. Close out the show this stuff. You want to put some fucking San Miami on? What do you want to play? Let's do it. Let's fucking do it. Play that firefire one that I like. The one with the stupid stupid beat. The one I wanted to rhyme over, the one you're rapping over that I wanted to

take you off of. It's like with violins, you fucking prick. Come on. You act like you don't know what song. How many songs do you have that I like? Jesus Christ. You kidding me? Are you kidding me right now? The one I like.

All genius. I don't remember which one you actually. Which one is a good one you fucking out on you right now? One called hummus. This got me in Alba. I'm another. No. The hot one from one of those albums that you put out.

It was a good one, man. It was like a three bar. Pandas? It wasn't like a three. It was called Pandas. That track you're talking about. It was like a five bar loop. There it is.

I bought Luke. That's the one. Called pandas. On YouTube? Please, can we please find Sam I am? Sam I am. Sam I am. I am. He's such a fucking...

I want to thank Action Bronson again. I want to thank Hanna for sponsoring the podcast. Don't forget. It's a punk band from the 70s if you just spell it out. Don't forget. Go to Hotted.com right now and press in. Church. And get 10% off the living to your house.

I want to thank Anxham Bronson. Buy all that fucking shit. What do you, what are they slinging over there? I want to thank fucking utopia peanut butter macaroons. I'm going to have to eat another one to take the edge off, you know what I'm saying? What's the song, sir?

Okay. Handses. Like the animals. Okay. It's a really fucking fired beat, but I wish he wasn't rapping on it. Definitely not my best. I love you guys. We'll see you Wednesday.

Peace. Saturday night. Ice House, bitch. It's 7.30. Stay black. That fucking bullshit. Oh yeah, that was a good thing I'd be. Put a piece of prosciutto in front of the mic, that's not the pop. Five bars for a stanza.

I'm looking down on you from these trees like a gorgeous panda. While you look like a fucking George Costanza, I hold the answer. Other rappers like colon cancer. I do a show, you throw your hands up, then I'll fold the money and roll the rubber bands up. Full-planned banquet. I'm in a fine dining establishment.

Wine in the best freshly caught by hands. slabs the salmon with the perfect parents. The side dishes are a must. When there's five digits and plus, it's tucked in an envelope and sitting by my nuts. What are the ingredients in fine dishes? Sit back, listen, you'll find my mind functions as exquisite as wine reduction on Atlantic fishes.

If you don't like me, don't let it get to be an affliction. Fact is, your sister loves me, your mom listens and grandma's writing me fan fiction. I'm auspicious while you wash dishes. Uh, girls blow me soft kisses while they're dreaming or something this more explicit And all critics suck along Penness

I stand it different While you sound like you need to sit down With someone who will hold that little hand And listen You're sore and hurt Try to drag me through the floor and dirt Just say my name I'll hang a chain on my Dior shirt

Put in some more work That's what I do Just say my name I do it