The Church of What's Happening Now: The New Testament - #553 - Sin Quirin

Episode Date: January 25, 2018

Sin Quirin, a musician who plays and writes for the band "Ministry" as well as multiple other musical projects, joins Joey Diaz and Lee Syatt LIVE in studio.  This podcast is brought to you by: 
MeUndies.com Go to meundies.com/JOEY for 20% off of your order of a pair of MeUndies Matching Pair underwear with free shipping in the US and Canada.   Hellotushy.com - Go to Hellotushy.com/church for 10% off of your order and stop using nasty toilet paper forever!     Onnit.com - Use Promo code CHURCH for a 10% discount at checkout.     Recorded live on 01/23/2018.
  

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It's not your breath That's not the look on your face Because love is love It's not the order of your armpits Maybe your asshole just stinks so bad That it's creeping out of your sweatpants You ever have an ass smell that bad You've been sitting there reading the paper on the train

And you can smell your own ass I've been there I know you have Because you eat that hummus shit That's why you need a portable bidet And hello Tushie's there Tooshee's there to serve that fucking asshole

of all its cleansing purposes. You asked me, Joey, what is a portable bidet? Like I just said, you hook it up to your bathroom, you don't need a plumber, it takes 10 minutes unless you're a fucking half of Momo. And you know what? Your future is filled with

an asshole that's fresh and clean at all hours of the day. Even if you go to the gym and you sweat up a little bit, you know time to jump in the shower, you sit on that bidet, you take that shit of debt and then you let that water hit your asshole. Tip-top, Magoo, you dipped a nut sack in there to give it another once over

so the balance of the sweat doesn't hit your nutsack. You towel it dry with a Mianti's towel. Not a Miondi's towel, a Hello Tushy towel, and you're ready to rock and roll. But for all this happened, for this fantasy to unfold, you've got to go to HelloTushy.com right now. They've got bidetes that come in all different colors. And they started $69 with a $6.9.

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And get 10% off your bidet. Kick that motherfucking Mulee. Kick it, Lee. It's the church of what's happened now, motherfuckers. You're goddamn fucking right. It's a church who it's happening now, motherfuckers. My man's sin for ministry

The Christ Killer And nothing but fucking love You thought it was going to be a fucking Oh hum type day Fuck you It's the church coming at you motherfuckers It's a beautiful fucking day to be alive Uncle Joey here with his main man

Sin Quirin Sin Kirin Kirin Let's do Kiddin Close enough And my main man The Christ Killer still recovering from Austin, Texas.

The queso's been coming out of his asshole by the ounce the last two days. But that's what he gets. I told him, don't go to chewies without Alka-Seltzer. You did not say that. You did not say that. Don't go to Chewys without Alka-Seltzer, right? You did tell me I should get some yogurt on the way back

and I didn't do that. Because they're microbiots, your stomach, your intestines are ready. Why do you think I can eat a fucking bicycle? I can eat a bicycle, nothing happens. How do you know that already? Because I've eaten a half a bicycle one time. No, because. You got to take care of your stomach, a little compocha,

a little yoga from time to time. I had no idea. Sure. Without the fruit, don't be a half a fag. What's going on, my man? Send talk to me, baby boy. Rocking and rolling, man. Fucking ministry.

Yeah, man. The Kings. Yeah. 1992 destroyed Lowellup, a loser, the whole fucking thing. Absolutely, yeah. And they've been together since like the 80s. Early 80s, like 81, 82. And you're a kid listening to this stuff going.

Yeah. I was like, I mean, I was in high school, man, when I first heard ministry. And, you know, I was always like, fuck, I wish I could be in a band like this. I wish I could be in a band like this. And it's fucking crazy how life happens, man, and how shit turns out. Now, when was the first time you joined the band? How old were you? I was, let's see, it was late 2005.

So I was like 36. That's the first time you joined the band. Not the band. A band. Oh, no, no. A band. A band. What was the first time you were involved with a band?

18. Before that, I mean, you know, little garage bands. But, like, the first band that, like, I actually played out, like, the whiskey and shit like that. I was 18. Yeah. What was the name of that band? Rampage. No shit.

Yeah, dude. This was 19. Fuck, dude. Eighty-eight. Something like that. In the fucking height of down. Oh, dude. Sunset strip.

It's when, you know, it was like, there were more people. on the sunset strip outside on the street than in the clubs. Like it was just jam-packed. And you would see just all the cats from every band just out there flying, passing out flyers because that's how you did it back then is, you know, there was no internet. It was just like word of mouth and it was you were out there flying, just handing flyers out.

You know, every Friday, Saturday night, the sunset strip from like, from the whiskey to gazare's, which was what, you know, what the key club turned into. It was just jam-packed every week. weekend. Yeah. And what was it like during the week? Were there bands?

It was still bands playing, yeah. But like the weekend was when it was just, it was fucking mayhem out there, man. You know, I've been here for 20 years and I bump into people from time to time. You know, I don't remember their name. Just interesting people in a building. And you've asked them, like, when I lived on sunset, there was a chick that lived on the second floor, this is 98. And she had been there already for 20 years.

So I asked her, I go, how was it this? Because when we got there, there was hookers still on sunset by Curson in 7-11. There was still hookers. That hamburger stand that they made famous. Fast times? All-American Pipp. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The guy used to bring his hookers there right there to the hamburger joint on sunset.

It's not even there, no more. I don't even know where it used to be. What would he do with them at the hooker? At the hamburger joint. Right out on Sunset Boulevard. In the fucking, right in the open. Two in the afternoon, three black chicks, an Asian chick, and a chubby white chick with blonde hair.

Right outside there. And he'd be sitting there eating fucking burgers all day. Sending bitches out right from there. You know how many times I walked past that? I mean, the first two years I was here, it was open. No, it was there, but it wasn't open. That's what I meant to say. The building was still there, but it wasn't.

Yeah, yeah. But she was just telling me, like, we lived on not Schrader, Gardner, between Elcompatre. Yeah. Across the guitar center. Yeah. And she was outside pointing at places one day. You know, we were telling the story here that that garage behind that place,

Ralphie Mae lived there, and in that hallway, Matthew McConaughey rented garages, even after he was huge. Wow. Just to work on his cars, and Ralphie would torture him. She's like, that guy's a point. punk up the corner if you go up the corner on Gardner and you make that sharp right

into those garages she's like garage number four is where Guns and Roses lived some weird shit that they had in that and then she just started pointing out places. Faster pussycat this name, that name who hung out there. In fact

that's right across from the Sunset Grill where fucking Don Henley wrote the song with the Eagles like I don't know for me yeah. So it's such an interesting fucking neighborhood that I wish somebody did a 10-hour documentary on and showed from like what was happening in 77 to I can't imagine you know I'm a jersey I'm a fat fucking jersey snort and coke and motley crew had taken over the airwaves oh yeah I can't imagine what they were doing here yeah dude in like 82 83 when they were playing like the whiskey and fucking starwood

and gazaris and shit like that I mean it was just, it was all those bands that became huge were local guys that were just in that Hollywood LA scene just all up and down sunset boulevard and shit like that. So it was crazy back then, man. And I caught the tail end of that. You know, I wish I would have been there when I was like, you know, in like 80, 81 when they were, you know, doing that circuit. I caught like 83, 84 is when I started to go down to the sunset strip when I was like, you know, 13, 14 years old and shit. But, I mean, I got to see a lot of those fucking bands. It ended up being fucking rock stars, you know, fucking Motley, Guns and Roses.

Dude, I remember being in, like, junior high, maybe early high school, and talking to my friends. And it's like, oh, who's playing this weekend? It'd be like, oh, guns and roses at the fucking Trubidor again. Like, you know, it was almost like, whatever, we already saw them. Like, you know, what else is happening? Like, that's how fucking crazy it was. And you look back on it now and you're like, holy shit. Like, we were seeing these fucking.

and like, you know, guys had turned into legends back then. Their first time was already out? No. Wasn't out yet, man. 84, no. Wasn't out yet. Mm-mm. Wasn't out yet.

They were on the, who was big then? Like, Motley? Motley? Motley's first record was already out. Faster pussy cat, weren't they from? They were a little after that. They were local guys in that during that era. But yeah, I used to see Fast Plusie get at the country club and the troubadour and the whiskey and all that shit.

Yeah. I saw like poison. I saw all of those LA bands, man. Like, I remember being at a fucking signing, like, for poison because some girl that I was dating at the time was big into them. And I went with her to the signing. And it was like 80, I don't know, dude, 83, 84, something like that. And it was when they just gotten signed. So I got to see all those, all those cats, you know.

It was crazy, man. I mean, to think back now, and it's so different now, a lot of those clubs aren't even there. Like the coconut teaser, which the club that used to play, We used to play it all the time. That was on Laurel Canyon? Right, no, right on, Crescent Heights and Suns. Right on the corner. Right when you made the, well, you're coming down in Laurel Canyon.

Right on the right. I did comedy there. Yeah, really? Sure, you had to go there like on Tuesday nights. Yeah, did five minutes and they'd fucking throw shit out. That was, that was one of the clubs that I got, like, signed out of, like, the first, my first band, I got a record deal. Like, we were playing, like, the teaser and shit like that. And it was, now this is like when the, the, you know, the,

the new metal thing started happening. And we would play with like bands like System of a Down, coal chamber, static X, all those new metal bands. And we got signed at the tail end of that corn. We were like the last, I always joke,

we were like the last fucking band to get signed from that scene. And this is Rampage. No, this is now a band called Society One. Society One. Yeah. This is now like in the late 90s. It was like 97, 98.

And how long did you lurk with them for? About six years. And then you bumped into Al. We had the same booking agent. So my old band Society One had the same booking agent as ministry. And we had a mutual friend, this guy, Paul Raven, who was a bass player in a band called Killing Joke. So he knew Al. And he's the one, those two guys kind of introduced me to Al, like in 2003 or something like that.

And they were like, you know, if you need a kid. guitar player called sin and um i remember meeting al and he's like yeah i'm gonna call you i need a guitar player and like two years later he fucking calls me and he's like i need a guitar player for his other band called a revolting cox and um and this is like 2005 now and um so i came in to the revolting cox is just a guitar player and we were it was the revolting cox in ministry going on tour in 2006 you guys were open for minister right yeah and and al was doing double duty because he was singing for revco for of Roltencocks and ministry. And during that tour is when

Al and I became like close and we started talking about music and all kinds of shit. And he was like, man, he goes, I want you to help me write the next ministry record. And so ministry went to Europe after that U.S. run. When they got back, he flew me to El Paso, Texas,

which is where he was living at the time. And I went out there with my little fucking Tascam four track recorder with some riffs. And he was like, Like, you know, let me hear what you got. And so I played him, you know, one of my riffs. And he's like, all right, you know, it sounds killer. He's like, let me know what is done.

And he splits. So I'm in the fucking studio with this engineer that I just met. And I just fucking finished this tune and called him when it was ready. And that's how that record happened. This record called The Last Sucker. And I ended up writing like half of that record with him. And I was honestly just like hoping, one of my riffs would end up on a fucking ministry record.

That's all I was, like, really hoping for. And ended up doing, like, half that album with him. And that was 2006 and been here ever since. Now he can't fucking get rid of me. 11 years. Yeah. And this is a band that spans, what, three decades? Yeah.

That is just... So are you one of the newer members? I'm considered one of the newer members, even though I've been with them since 2006. Right. But I've been with him. Me and the keyboardist, J.B., John Bechtel, have been with him the longest. That's great.

Yeah. Like, we've had, it sort of turned into like a spinal tap with drummers. And, you know, we've had a bunch of drummers and we've had different bass players and shit like that. But, but J.B. and I have been with him now since 2006. You know, as you've seen when you came in, you saw the old circus. Yeah, fuck yeah. That somebody gave me. We were talking about how I.

in the 70s and 80s, you didn't have the internet. So you had to buy circus, and there was another one. Hit parader. Hip paraded. Because I'm not a big Rolling Stone guy. Rolling Stone was more for a foo-foo-type people. I've always liked music. I've always loved music.

I love the A, B's and Cs of it. I love the promotion, the smoke, the glitter. I like who shouldn't have glitter. I'm one of those guys. But the thing that's always intrigued me the most has been the writing process. The writing process on music is something that I can never even fathom. I have a hard time writing a stupid fucking joke. Never mind, but see, over the years from the documentaries that have been out and stuff like that,

you learn how things get put together. You go away for six months and come back with riffs, and you send them to the drummer who writes the lyrics, and then he sends them back to you. And it's this process, but then you go into the studio and something else gets added in there, by coincidence, and it's just like comedy is in a way.

It's taking two or three variables, figuring them out for what they are, putting them together, and then at the end, they all come out the same flavor kind. Music is always, like I said, I would have gone the musician route, but I was such a fucking hell on wheels.

I would have sold my guitar eight times. And when the cops are looking for you, it's tough to have a guitar. Tough to have a guitar and be on the run. It's tough for a getaway with the guitar. Man, look out with a guitar. That's it. He's got a guitar. Yeah.

No, I hear you though. And I, you know, that's one of the things that interests me the most is not only the live, the performance part of it, which I love. Like, that's just one of the ultimate highs for me is the performance. but I get the same rush from creating music and from knowing, okay, I'm going to write a song or we need to do an album or something, right? And it's like, you know at the beginning of that day, you have nothing written.

There's nothing in front of you, right? And by the end of that day, you know that you're going to have like a blueprint of something. And it's something that I wish like there was like a formula or there was something that I could say to people, do this, this, this, and this, and you're going to write a song. I don't know what that is.

Nobody really knows. I don't know. You got the Jean-Pereb book yet. Did you get in the mail? I did, yeah. Did you look through it? I haven't yet. No, I just came.

When you first look through it, it's going to look like Chinese. Really? You might as well get a Chinese book and call me up and go, Joe, go fuck yourself and hang up. Because it's drills, it's a lot of chitty-chattie. You know, when you look to write, you read as much as you can about writing. And then one day you come to the conclusion

that you could just read so much, it's just fucking time to write. Just write. Just shut the fuck up and write. That's what you're doing. I want you to give me your schedule for the week. And from 8 to 10, you've got to write. Then from 10 to 12, you're going to do jumping jacks.

Then from 12 to 1, you're going to fuck the wife. Then from 1 to 5, you're going to write again. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Like, I finally realized after 15 years that you have to put writing, whether it's music, comedy, it's always in blocks. You know, like musicians, there's something else. You guys, studio time is expensive.

You ain't got time to fuck around. Once you get in there, it's all the barples in. You got six weeks, and the record labels paying for this, and at the end it comes out of your eye. So I was actually into, I was wondering, because with comedy, like, comedians will try out bits, and they evolve over time. Am I wrong, or do songs?

Are they just out when they're out? Like you don't really get to like workshop them at all. No, I mean, we don't, that's an interesting point. We really don't get to sort of, you know, use a crowd as guinea pigs. I mean, in the sense that we write a song and then it goes on a record or we perform it. And at that point, we just, we kind of see if people are digging it or not. But by that point in time, the song's already done. It's already written.

It's already recorded. It's already whatever. So we kind of just, it just gets put out there. And, you know, so yeah, we don't really get to sometimes, you know, depending on how much shit they're thrown at us, we can tell if they dig it or not, you know. So. You know, you read about these or, you know, these people who like Black Sabbath recorded volume four and eight hours in the studio, you know, one day. Yeah.

Shit like that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's so. And I know they had it written before they went in there, you know. But it's interesting what Lee said because, but I do know one.

thing. I'm not a musician. And I do know when I write 10 jokes, all right, I know there's two of them in there. They're going to get me somewhere, okay? The one that I'm banking on to get me somewhere, that one duds

three times. But the one that was okay really gets a good laugh and I got some to go with it. I always knew it. I just didn't really focus on it. I focused on that one because I was, I think in the studio, after you've laid your eight tracks down.

You know what I'm saying? And you play it. You know if there's magic or you know if there's no magic. That's what it's always a bit. Sure. There's too many musicians who are fucking perfectionist.

There's such perfectionist that they couldn't even keep their band together. They annoyed everybody. Sting. You know, the guy from Pink Floyd. There's so many guys that are perfectionists. The record label will tell you whatever you want to hear.

They just want to hear. They just want to get their investment back. Exactly. They just want to recoup their investments. They'll tell you whatever the fuck you want to hear. It's that 19-year-old assistant that sees you and sperm comes out of his mouth and says that latest cut you sent this fucking brilliant. But on top of all that, you guys know in the studio. Yeah.

There's something that has to. It's very true. Very true. I see it in all the documentaries. In the 50 years I've been listening to music, that's something I've always thought. about. So you do it or or you, like during Ozzie's tour, the first one, they were playing flying high again. They played like two songs from the album that was already written and recorded basically. They were doing that. Sometimes that happens. Of course.

When you're on tour and you might put out two songs just to see, which people always get pissed off, by the way. Of course, yeah. By the third song, you're rocking and rolling. And also this guy wants to do a tear a jerk and go fuck yourself all right because you thought about your mom and the toilet I don't give a fuck keep going and then at the end on your time go inside and serenade those little fucking bimboes that want to hear that shit

let me open the door a second well the question I have then is because I think you're probably right and I think it would be different for a comedian like Joey versus someone who just started but like for your early bands did you know what was magic or did you ever have an album that you're like

this is going to kill and then it would It didn't go as well. Yeah. No, I mean, it's very true in the sense that you can usually tell what has that magic and what you think is going to do well and go over well. You're not always 100% right with that. Sometimes we think, you know, shit, this is the one. Like, this fucking tune is going to go over great.

And it's the one that you're kind of like, eh, it's just kind of a throwaway. It's there. but so that it does surprise you sometimes but for the most part you know when we're in there we're always kind of just looking at each other going yeah this fucker has this this this this is the one this something yeah yeah it's just something that it's it's it's really hard to describe it but it's this kind of it's this electricity you feel with it this magic you feel with with with you know um when you've recorded it and you're listening back to it that you know it's gonna fucking do something like that's why i've always hated radio part of the

me has hated radio. Radio is for people who have one hit wonders. Radio should be for people who sang one song, and that's what that was it. That was it. Because why would you play living after midnight till I'm fucking 90, and you never play, you don't have to be old to be wise. Right, exactly. Yeah, which is the best solo. Yeah, which is so many other tracks that are fucking amazing. It drives me fucking crazy radio because of that reason. And it's like, I like, I like, The whole secret of Bonn, for years, I wanted a picture show about Saturday mornings. What we did as children.

You know, guys like you mean to this children, we had a fucking stupid paper round, or you carried rocks for your father, whatever you fucking did for three or four bucks a week. And we decided on an album, and we'd walk from Atwater Village to fucking somewhere. And we went and bought an album and couldn't wait to come back and listen to it. And we listened to it front and back three times before we went out and laid our opinion. And it was just great because in everything that you bought and expected to listen to, you found a gem. You found something that you found love with even more for the song that you originally bought it for. Exactly.

When I bought Sabotage, for example, you like Sabotage? Of course. I bought it for a hole in the sky. Yeah. And I liked the album cover, how it looked. Thrill of it all, the first song on the other side, has turned out to be my all-time favorite song of all-time.

Tight to Sabbath bloody Sabbath. But it's so weird. I like that. Yeah, absolutely. I always liked listening to an album and whatever album I bought the song for, there's something else on the second side that's going to fuck your world up.

We didn't tell you about it. We wanted you to buy the album. Let the radio keep pumping this heartache tonight bullshit. Exactly. And on the other side of the last run, you got the Greeks don't want no freaks. Exactly. It's true though, man.

I mean, with every record that I own, that's the case. You hear something, okay, well, here's the single, or here's what they're promoting and pushing. But there's always one or two tracks, like the deep cuts that you're just like, fuck, man, this is cool as shit. And that stuff will never get played on the radio. You'll never hear it, like, you know what I mean, being promoted and shit like that. So I miss that kind of shit from back in the day, like getting the record and, It's exactly how it was for me, dude. It was like fucking going to Music Plus in Glendale on my bike, dude.

Nobody would fucking do it, Sin. I know. Sint together different musician every Saturday. Yeah. Twelve episodes. Dude. The favorite record store, Nick, and their hometown, I'll fly to Mississippi. Yeah.

Go buy a vinyl and let's put it on and describe the whole process. First off, your mother wasn't home. Your mother was at your aunt's house playing cards. So if it was a double album or the album open up, You could roll a joint in there and clean the seeds out. You know what I'm saying? I mean, it was such a fucking process. Did you guys have like a, like a ritual every week?

It was a ritual. Yeah. It was a ritual pretty much if you had a day job and you made whatever for $450 an hour, every Saturday you bought it out. Mm-hmm. And you stopped at Burger King, got the chicken sandwich, and you stopped at the Kung Fu store and looked at the stars. It was just part of it.

And let me tell you something else. I don't give a fuck how many times sin. I could pick up sin and sin would say to me, listen, I'm going to go up there by Neil Young and Crazy Horse live today. Why? Because I heard it and I like it. Okay. On the way home, guess what sin will have?

Judas Priest, sin after sin. Because when you went there, something about the album covers grabbed you. It was a fucking beautiful process that this country has released. all right i like iTunes too i like the idea of sin calling me and saying listen to this jam and me going on my phone and pressing three buttons but that's not what it's all about

i still when i'm bored do you know i go to atomic you like at atomic yeah of course yeah it's not omiba yeah but it's cool as shit because it makes you work yeah you have to look through everything you're going through the albums like the old days yeah this is reminding me of going to a video store like that that was my thing when i was a kid that's it generation. I just went to it in Austin and I'm, did anyone ever have like a rental

place for albums? That would have been awesome for kids to go and try a new place out. No, no. These fucking savages would have ripped the album apart. Dude, do you realize I used to go through the fucking trash bin at Music Plus in Glendell just to get the fucking cutout, the album cutouts that they would throw away? Like, that's how hardcore I was into

records and albums and just staring at them. And you remember reading every fucking thing on those things, dude. You know, I look at these albums that I have behind me. And sometimes I buy the album just to show, show people how lucky we were, what we got to read. You know what I mean? Some of them still have the original sleeves. And some of them don't.

But the sleeve was your. was your thing for the day. Like, this is a noun that I never forgot. This was, I think, one of the most brilliant hounds in the packaging. Where the fuck is it here?

God damn it. Boom. Boom. Dude. Okay, Led Zeppelin in through the outdoor. Final album. Came in a fucking bag. I know. Pro Jam did that too, Joey.

Yeah. But 29,000 fucking years later. Okay? You bought the album, okay? Into the outdoor. It came in a bag. Okay. This is a special edition one.

No big fucking deal. But it shows a guy at a bar. Tremendous picture. Does it say anything about Led Zeppelin on there? All for the imagination. Say anything about Led Zeppelin on there? All for the imagination. Say anything about Led Zepp on there?

Same thing on there? All for the imagination. They put as much time into the album cover. as they did, the music sometimes. But here's where it got beautiful. It got beautiful. Well, somebody took it out of here. It got beautiful because the original sleeve to this album cover

was a sleeve that was projected to be his last night. John Bonham's last night. Do you remember it? If you took a wet sponge and you sponged it around, all the colors came out. Who does that? No. Who designed the?

Was it the band? Did they have an art designer at the label? Who had these? Whoever was the fucking genius in those days. Yeah. I buy a CD of ministry now.

I open it up. It's a page. The songs. They thank the dog. And that's it. That's all I get. I mean, how many, like,

did they, I would love to know, like, the percentage of, like, let's say 15 years ago, you used to print 50,000 CDs. Now is it 10,000? Oh, yeah. Like, I would love to see how many,

like, that many CDs anymore. Dude, it's, I mean, a band like ministry, which was like a platinum selling act back in the day, you know, in the 90s. Now it's like we're lucky if we sell fucking 50,000. And that downloads? 50,000 downloads. Yeah, just, I mean, we don't sell records anymore, dude. People steal our shit. Like, I mean, even before the records out, people already have our shit everywhere. How? It's, you know, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, slippery slope there it's usually goes to the people that are manufacturing this that are all thieves and they steal the shit and they just start and a lot of it starts happening in russia is where we've

seen a lot of it start like that's where all most of the bootlegs start from and it just starts to spread from there and dude we don't sell fucking shit anymore dude i mean back in the day this is a band that would sell a million fucking, you know, albums. Now it's like fucking not even nowhere near that. Who's a big song, Jesus. Jesus built my hot rod, just one fix. Yeah, I mean, that album, Psalm 69, huge. That was during the whole Wallapalooza, 92 era.

Right, right, 92 era. You guys were like the fucking, you were a blueprint for like Rob Zombie. Oh, yeah. Like that I felt like. Rob Zombie, nine-inch nails, fucking Manson, all that shit. Look at this shit. Oh, dude, I know. I know.

They put effort into their. It was all part of the whole experience of getting a record, man. It was all of this stuff, dude. You believe this is how crazy? Yeah. A fucking poster. This is when you did the acid, you forgot it was in there later. Is that the original poster or no?

Probably. Oh, my God. These are reissues. But that's what it was. Just the fact that they give you all these things, it gave you something. It gave you something. It connected you a little bit more. With what the fuck you would do with.

You know, I remember Van Halen buying 1980, one of those albums, not 84, and they would thank the Hilton's. Like all you guys would thank the hotel chain. So I knew when you came to town, that's who you were fucking stank. It was the fucking craziest thing. They would thank the Hilton and pictures of the tour. Covers were interesting. I remember they shot the longest shot.

They sent me a DVD, 20 of them. to give away the friends and shit. You opened it up and it was a page. There was a guy there every day with 22 fucking cameras taking pictures. What they do with those fucking pictures? What do they do with those fucking pictures? Nothing.

Nothing. Put them on the thing. Show them to people. Give the people a little something extra. We get interesting, man. We get like an experience how it used to be. That was like, I mean, you know, when I was a kid and I would, the record that got me into playing rock

was Kiss Alive was the first live record I was six years old my older cousin who was like 11 at the time brought it over and you know

I was into music because my parents always had it playing in the house and but I'd never heard anything like that so this is 75 dude and so he brings it over

and he shows it to me and I'm like I remember asking them if they were superheroes because I was looking at the fucking cover and he goes out they're fucking rock band

check it out And so he drops a needle on the record. First song, Deuce comes on. And, dude, and I'm looking now, it's a double live album with the booklet, with all their live pictures and shit. And literally, man, my life just completely turned upside down at that moment. And I was like, fuck, dude. Like, I still get chills. I still remember telling my cousin, I was like, what's that?

Who's that? And he's like, oh, that's Ace. That's a lead guitar player. And I was like, that's what I'm going. going to do, man. At six years old, I told him that. Because of that whole experience of that record, hearing the music, looking at those fucking visuals, just reading everything. I was completely just engulfed in that. I would come home when I had that album and I hung out with this family that they were a great family and the youngest kid was my friend and he had the album and I would listen

to it at my house first while I was eating. Like an after school, Sam. And then I'd go play And then we'd go back to his house And we put it on in the attic And we do the air guitar Of course Yeah The whole fucking thing

You know And it was funny I told Eddie brought For years That he'd talk to me About kiss And I would kind of shun him off And he didn't understand why

What happened was This kidding me We had kiss alive And the one after that I want you I want you Rock and Roll over Rock and Roll over

Was that the order? Yes Right I remember we bought those two together. Like, that's what we did on Saturday. You know, it was, in those days, you had to hide the album, my only home because you didn't want your

old brothers or your friends. So, it was funny. I listened, I loved rock and roll over, but I really liked Kiss Alive. And that was it. You put Kiss Alive on, and you would scroll through the pictures. Oh, man. Just fucking

great pictures of face freely on the guitar. Like, I can't even describe the word cool. Like, you can't even No, well, he looked cool. No. No, he looked like a fucking guitar player. Yeah. With the makeup and how he was standing.

And it didn't make me fall in love with the guitar. I mean, it fell in love with kiss. But you know what happened, bro? That kid died in a car accident. I took Kiss alive and I took Rock and Roll over. And I put it in his casket during the week. And I promised I'd never be into Kissing. And I took 30 fucking years to listen to Kiss again.

Yeah. And I hope that he forgives me in heaven. But that's the deal. Wow, man. I loved Kiss early on. Yeah. But they took my whole kiss fucking hair from me. Yeah.

Everybody buried him with a kiss out. I'm like, I don't know how many. Kiss probably had three hours of that time, 78, four. Yeah, they'd had three before the live record. Right. So three live and then right. Yeah. So that's why I was never into kiss.

But I still remember. those pictures and how dark they were. Man. The photography was fucking amazing. Amazing. You just wanted to jump on your skin and go that guy. Yeah. So fucking badass.

Yeah. Dude, I mean, you're seeing fucking pictures of Simmons with blood. Oh, my God. In the fire. He looked like Lee. He looked like Lee with the bung before. Lee was doing a Simmons impersonation here a little while. I am Jewish.

You all right, Lee. Take a paper towel spitting it again real quick. Just to give me a piece of it. mine, not to goof on you. No, I think I'm okay. Just filter. No, no, no, no. Dog, I was okay, too. Because that's why it started. It started with a Paracquot.

I'm good. Okay, you're sure. I think I'm going to have to go to the doctor just to check it out anyways, but I think I'm okay. No, I know you'll be at, if I know anything about you, tomorrow. You'll be at the doctor at 801 a.m. If I know anything about him, you never seen a Jew hundred contract like I got. You know what I'm saying? A chick touches his shoulder. He goes for an SDD test.

You know, but she was a hookah. I kind of got up through my skin. Lee, it doesn't matter. You can never be too safe, Joe. You can never be too safe. Next thing you know, walk around with a fungi toenail and shit. And that's, like, that's why the horse meat thing is crazy, because I'm crazy about, I'm not saying I eat the best food, but I'm crazy about, like, raw chicken. I don't do any, like, that, like, eggs, like.

Talk, I don't do no author rate a restaurant. I knock it off. You know what an off-the-rater restaurant is. Anything that your girlfriend wants to go. That's an off the rate of rec restaurant. Anyway. The Gene Simmons. No, no, no.

Just the whole album thing. I miss it now. And that's why when I got the record player for Christmas, you know, my home is Obieba. But who's got the time? Yeah, I know. Who's got the time to go to Omiba because it's four hours from Uncle Joey?

Fuck, yeah. Because you find 20 things you want, then you find 10 things that you really want, and now you're one. and now you're walking around with 30 pounds of albums decide which 10 you're going to put back and you still drop the 800. Oh, fuck.

Every time I go to old Miba, I drop 300. 300. You're like magicians. Bam, 300. Every time I go to old Miba. And you've got to stand online and you've got to get tortured. There's still 300.

So if you were single, you'd take a couple ofibles and spend your entire day there because I've been there and I see the professionals come in and they zip through those things. No, you have to have time. To go to old Mibbaugh.

You don't know how many times I go to Omiba with no glasses on and I'm happy. Like I forgot my glasses. Thank God I'll get the assistant asking if he's got it. The assistant. And the river dirty. Get the fuck out of here. Because if not, dog, I'll sit there with the fucking things. I used to live three blocks from Omiba.

And I found shit on Omiba. Oh, dude. That's a process there, man. It's a process. Yeah. But I'll tell you it was the type of shit I found. Yeah. I went looking on eBay.

And the cheapest, this is after the kid's mother. has stepped on the album, you know, they lit the cover on fire, two songs were missing. They wanted a hundred bucks for the album. I went to Omiba, and I got the DVD for the small $999. Wow.

I wanted the vinyl. You're not going to find the vinyl for less than fucking $10,000. Yeah, yeah. So, you know, it's shit like that. Yeah. That's what I'm talking about. Okay, you wanted the vinyl, Joey.

You're a traitor. No. I wanted to hear the fucking music. That's what I wanted to hear. Did I still have my parents vinyl from the 60s, man? Like I have my dad's old Animals Records and Stones, like

original pressing Yeah, yeah. It was a different gauge. Yeah. Before, I think, like, maybe 78, the gauge on an album was different. Let me tell you some,

you can put it in the sun all day. Oh, yeah. And that motherfucker didn't melt. Yeah. All of a sudden one day, leave an album in the car for one day. You got a frizzing. Yeah.

You got a fucking little frisbee. It's true, man. Those old records are like, that's like, thick as his fucking table. Thick as a fucking, that's how you know. That's how I know, because the gauge, or maybe it does to me. Maybe I don't know what I'm talking about.

No, it's true. Feels a little thicker. They're super thick on the old ones, man, and it's a lot lighter on the newer ones. Do you ever think about what would have happened if you had kept all those records, Joey, like the money they'd be worth, or no? I gave them to somebody. I gave them to somebody who I'm still in contact with.

Oh, Jesus. And part of me always wants to, to say, you don't listen to that shit, no boy. You got kids now. But the other part of me says, how can I do something like that? Yeah. How can I do something like that? She's going through something heavy right now.

And her and I weren't dating. We never dated. We were just music friends. Yeah. I shoplifted all those arms anyway. I used to go to Pathmark. So it's pure profit. If there was 200 albums in there, I clipped 100 of them.

Oh, my God. The other 100 I legitimately sweat for because it was, see, we got, you guys didn't see, Everybody got fucked in the ass because I got fucked in the ass between we had all things. They were pushing all three things on us still. The 8-tracked the cassette and the fucking album.

At the same time? At the same time. The 8-track was getting absolved, but the cassette was still coming on strong with the album. So yeah, you could buy a cassette for your car, but that wasn't the same as having the experience.

That's the fucking experience. That's why right now I really don't give a fucking Netflix excuse me a special anymore. I really don't, because I'm going to put out an experience on an album. I'd rather put it on vinyl, rather give them the inside, pictures,

lyrics, the whole bit, man. A fucking tattoo. There was a band who gave you a tattoo. It kissed it that. Kissed that. Kistich and Chong gave you a rolling paper. You know, everybody took care of you in those days when I missed that. I don't mind. And you know how much albums were early at that time? 699. for a fucking hour.

I paid six. If you bought it out, like let's say you went to Sam Goody, Glendale music, what was the one on Sunset Strip? A tower. Power. Yeah, you paid this $5.99 plus tax.

But if you went to like a place that was down the block from you, some hippie ran it, he just had it so he could smoke dope and sell records, he charged your $750. Give him the $7.50. What do I give a fuck? He's trying to make a limit.

he'd even play the album for you. Oh, yeah. I had one of those guys. They put it on. Absolutely. Yeah. So could you damage? Like, with CDs, you can scratch them.

Tapes, though, the tape can come out. How do you ruin other than heat? Can you ruin an album? It melts. So that's the only way it can get, like, you're not going to scratch it. It melts. Let's say if you put it somewhere bends. Like what I'm doing right there, that's not good.

Okay. Because your album will bend. Oh. People will come over here with professionals and go. What the fuck? Excuse me I got them in a milk crate Which keeps them straight

Yeah You know But no no There's people who are Dickety Wickedy Bickety About their hours

I don't blame them That's how it'd be Wickedy dickety Fickety covers See if I knew What I knew now I would I would have saved everything

I would have millions I had albums That the area You know Sabbath bloody Sabbath The original releases I had all that shit original release with the lyrics, the fucking, the devil innuendos.

Yeah, fuck, yeah. Hold on one second. Let me do some shoutouts. I got more fucking questions for you. Don't go nowhere, right? Don't go nowhere. Mr. Willis, I love you. Randall, Nautamagan, Josh Hoss 3,

Sy Thomas, Matt Manchester, Nicholas Taylor, Kevaya Goon, and Kevin Glenn Cafe. I love you, cock suckers, all right? Don't forget this Thursday, Friday, Saturday. There's Charlotte. The Charlotte Comedy Zone. Yeah, I think about it for a minute. You know what I'm saying?

It's been a couple of rough days. I'm getting flashbacks of Vietnam. I was never there. Anyway, the Comedy Zone, Charlotte, North Carolina. I'm ready to rock. Rogan's in town in a different club. Fucking the UFC's there Saturday night. It's going to be a rock'em soccer motherfucking weekend at the UFC this weekend.

All right, Charlotte. So I'll see you guys at the show. Thursday night. Tip, Top, Magoo, 8 o'clock. You're out of there by 10.30. You're stoned to the gills. You'll get a burger. And you go home.

You're ready for work on Friday. And the third week of February, I'm at the Comedy Works in Denver. Denver is coming out to watch comedy, so I'm letting you know now, bitches. This is going to go quick. So do what you need to do. But don't forget, I don't give a fuck about nothing right now.

All I give a fuck about Thursday night at the Charlotte Comedy Zone, all right? Be there. be fucking square. You know, this podcast is about second chances and just people who have fucking made did something that

watched the journey, you know? You get these people who hit you up on Twitter and Facebook and they want to do this and they want to do that and they want to do this and I understand what you want to do, but you going on Twitter and Facebook ain't the answer.

You got to go do it, you know? You're a guy that grew up here in town went down to that sunset strip, you know, got into this band, from there got into another band. From there, you fucked the drummer's girlfriend, so you had to go to another band. From there, you know what I'm saying?

The life of a musician is really beautiful. Yeah. You know, I like to sit all these professional musicians like yourself down and start from day one. Like, I was in a band. We lip synced. We synced Michael Jackson. Here's the problem.

I was good. drummer was good and the guitar player was good. The bassist had the electrical equipment. He was terrible, but he was the bassist. So one day we had a fire and take everything. So now we were a good trio, but we had no sound here.

That's a problem. I've been there, man. So I love that journey. And this is a journey that's from a kid who listened to ministry. Yeah. From somebody who listened to ministry. Did you ever pay to watch them? I did.

Yeah. Yeah. This is from somebody. You know, today I shot a scene with that lady Michelle Leo. I've been watching Michelle Leo's and Thomas I. You know who it is, Lee? No, I think, is it Melissa? Melissa Leo.

You know who it is? Yeah, yeah. You know, you see these people for 20 years. Yeah. And one day, there you are, standing next to you in a room talking about this and this and that. Yeah. Something has nothing to do with what you're doing. You're like, if, nobody would believe me.

Yeah. nobody would believe that this lady's as nice as she is and she just said fuck you to one of the fucking people it's uh it's still you know it still trips me out and it and it still happens to me too I'll be in the studio sometimes with Al

and we'll be sitting like this and he'll just look at me and he'll be like well you know what do you think we should do here and I'm like and it fucking like hits me and I'm like dude you're really asking me like like you know my opinion like it's still it because I'm still like a fan and it still takes me back to like when I first saw the band and to me it's like it still doesn't seem real at times I'll be on stage we'll be on stage in fucking Europe man Poland I remember this one particular time there was 500,000 people in the crowd right and I'm up on stage with Al and when we're playing like just one fix one of the ministry classic yeah yeah and I'm up there and I remember just looking over my left shoulder and he's up at the mic and he just kind of looked over at me and just kind of winked and for like a few seconds it's like I wasn't there and I was watching like myself it was like kind of this weird out of body shit that went down and I was like what the fuck is this really like me like am I really fucking doing this and then it just kind of felt like I just landed back in my body again because it was just so weird to be up there with like one of my heroes doing it like like i'm in the fucking band like it's it's still weird to this day sometimes it's it's like i don't really believe it

i'm doing it obviously but it's still fucking trippy man it would freak me out more if i didn't know what you were talking about yeah you know you know what it's like man but think about a guy like me that at one time i was in a cell next to a guy you know i was in a cell next to a guy you know i was in a sell next to a guy watching stupid movies, you know? And then on Sundays I'd watch football and stupid movies. And one damn standing next to Michael Irvin doing the best damn sports show, you know, talking to him,

about nothing, wanting to tell him. Then next thing you know, I'm on stage in Vegas or Tim Allen for a whole fucking weekend talking to Tim Allen. And finally the last day, I got to tell him, hey man, you were the final push. When I found out you got locked up and made me really want to go out there. He goes, you know, I tell people to wait for the miracle to happen. It's such a fucking, like, how long were you out there fucking kicking doors now?

Dude, from the time I was 18 till, I mean, I slugged it out for about 12, 15 years in the Hollywood scene, dude, just being a local. Just here, dude. Session musicians, shit like that. Everything. Everything, dude. everything. And it was like, dude, I mean, there was no school for this. It was just the love of music that carried me. How'd you pay your bills? Dude, I did everything from fucking repoing cars to fucking working in mail rooms to fucking telemarketing, to fucking whatever the fuck I had to do to just pay my bills and continue to do music.

Like I didn't you know I didn't I mean I graduated high school but I didn't go to college like my parents split when I was about 13 The idea was I was gonna study music and I was gonna go to like Cal arts and fucking get a degree in music and shit like that That didn't happen my parents split I had to work I had to help my mom because it's I'm an only child so it was just me and my mom So I had to like help her and and I knew that college just wasn't in the you know It just wasn't gonna happen for me yeah so I was like I need to work I want to do music but I need to help my mom. So I always did whatever the fuck I had to do, man, job-wise. Like, I didn't give a fuck.

And, and, you know, I had to keep this dream alive of doing music. And I always knew, and it may sound weird to say, but I always knew something was going to happen. I didn't know when, but I always felt it. And I don't know if it's just like, you know, just how much fucking love and passion I had for music. that sort of enabled me to not listen. Yeah,

dude. You speed roll everything. Because you know, everybody's telling you, oh, you're not going to do shit, dude, you're going to just fucking,

you know, you should just give up. Dude, I heard that my entire life was, you know, you should just stop. You're never going to be in a, you're never going to make in a band.

You're never going to do this. You're never going to do that. All the doors fucking slamming in your face, dude. But it just, it was fucking blinders for me, dude, and I didn't listen to any of that shit.

And I just kept fucking going. kept going and it you know i mean fucking meeting people and doing things and fucking perseverance dude was key and you know i mean i've been lucky and blessed to have the fucking career that that you know that i've had i feel like the luckiest guy in the fucking world to do this i always want to do like

i don't know what the percentage is for comedians but i always wanted to do a percentage rate for bands yeah dude it's it's it's it's Terrific. You got a better chance to hit in the fucking lottery 10 times than getting a band with four people to go all the way to the top. What's the top? For me, is making great fucking music and sustaining. Yeah.

You know, that's a great band for me and sustaining. And sometimes, guess what? One of the three gets a little crazy. He listened to the suit. He snorted too much glue on the tour. And the band breaks up, but there's always two of the three. guys still go on and all of a sudden, bam, there they are

in something different. I love it. I love all the whole aspect of fucking music from beginning to add. The thing I couldn't imagine with is the band. I have a hard time being me. You know what I'm saying? I have a hard time.

Something they go, God damn I got a fucking playing. I can't imagine doing that with six people. Yeah. It's very true, man. I mean, having, being in a relationship, okay, is, you know what that's like. Now imagine adding another five guys to that. Just the band. And everybody trying to have the end result be the same and everybody having the same goal.

Dude, everybody's going like this, man, in different fucking directions. So it's a tough thing to keep that together. That's why, you know, this guy leaves, that guy leaves. but it's a tough thing man and then to live because you're basically living with these people on top of all of that on top of the music thing

it's you're living together when you're on tour you're traveling you're with them all the fucking time dude so it's not an easy thing it's not like when you're a kid you think about I want to be in a band it'll be great oh yeah you don't see that very well

no you don't see that's all you think about you know what I mean but once you get in it and you start to see the reality of all the shit. It's tough, man. I don't want to be on a tour bus by myself. Never mind with four people, shit. Dude. Exactly.

Feet. Exactly. Noises in the middle of the night. I can't, I can't even, you know, I did prison. I did the halfway house scene. I went to summer camp. I always knew I wasn't cut out for fucking sharing bedroom with men. You know what I'm saying?

Are you saying that the tour bus is worse than prison? Ah, ask my boy here after three weeks. It can be. You can get off, getting off a fucking, listen to me. First off, you get off stage, you just did a great show, and now you get in the fucking bus. All right, that drives all fucking night. You're in the back, you might have a few beers, you might go in your little thing, pull the curtains. If you think I could fall asleep with some guy driving a fucking bus.

You're fucking crazy. Who knows? Maybe you'd love it. Maybe like, listen to me. I'm going to help you out better. All right? No. Listen to me.

No. I don't trust nobody. And that was when there was no texting. I can't imagine texting now. I'm trying to go to sleep at night with a half a bag, and this guy almost got a fucking mule in the middle of the night. And I go flying off the cliff like the fugitive. What's that movie with fucking Harrison Ford?

Harrison Ford. Yeah. Fuck you. I don't ever want to be in a best. You want to take me from here to down the corner, let's go. Jitty up. But that bus shit at night, that's brutal.

You stop every couple days for a hotel room and for a good night's sleep. Not now. Maybe when I was 21 and I was doing blow and you gave me fucking Cosby pills so I wouldn't think about the bus driver all night. Do you ever get scared on planes, though? I get scared on everything, Lee.

Why, I think I ate 20 stars before I go on a plane? Did I not give you a fucking edible? for one on the plane 5.30 in the morning? 5.30 in the morning, both ways. That's so I can fucking, I can prepare your, I'm all the day, you know what I'm saying?

What's it more day? That's, the fuck. Jesus. Yeah. I've been lucky in that I've never been freaked out by flying and shit. You know, I don't get freak out by flying.

But that being said, I've had one flight. We did, going from, fuck where are we going from Australia to like, South Africa or some shit. Dude, I was, for the first time of my life, I was like, this is it.

This is it. This is it. I was like, I was asleep and I was in the last fucking row of this plane. And what woke me up was my head banging against the fucking side, dude. And dude, you know, it's a big ass plane, dude. And it just

starts fucking going all over the fucking place, dude. And I'm like, okay, you know, turbulence, whatever, but this did not feel like any turbulence I'd ever felt before. I honestly thought we were just doomed. And women started

crying, throwing up. Dude, people like right next to me, throwing up and the seats in front of them. Like, it was fucking brutal, dude, and it lasted, I mean, it felt like a couple minutes, which a couple minutes of that

heavy turbulence feels like fucking forever, dude. And we finally leveled out. People were going to the bathroom. Like women couldn't walk. They were so freaked out and scared and shit like that. And I was like, when we finally landed in Johannesburg, I was fucking like kissing the crown, dude.

I was like, fuck, I don't ever want to get on another plane again. And the next day, we had to get on another flight from fucking Johannesburg to like fucking South Paulo Brazil or some shit in another fucking like 10 hour flight and shit like that, dude. It's fucking brutal. That's like the fucking crazy I can't go more Yeah those are fucking

I want a passport But I can't be on no plan Unless you're playing Six hours under You'll probably have to go to like New York And then to London or something I just I don't have the patience Anymore for the flying dude

I have to be prepared The fucking iPad With your own movies The whole bit Dude The book Some drugs Well I've only done it in coach twice

And it was not that fun To be honest To the people It's the longest flight you've been on To Israel, it was like 13 hours, I think. Something like that, of 12. Maybe not 13, maybe. It's like 12.

Eight hours, people start stinking, though. Oh, dude. And they serve hummus. But, like, I would imagine you guys, did you guys get to fly first class? Like, that has to be kind of cool for 12 hours. It's cool. It's cool. Not 12 hours.

Not that cool. Not cool enough for that. Yeah, dude. There's planes not going to have rooms. Yeah. There's planes that are just phenomenal. That jet blue from fucking mint from New York to Boston on New York to fucking JFK, that's a beautiful situation.

If that's what you do, if you're telling me that you're just getting off a fucking show and you're up all night, you get on mint blue at six, they don't wake you up to 11.30. That's five hours of sleep where I comes from. That's not a bad little fucking yes to that, which is the secret. I can't sleep on a plane. Me either. That's the secret. I can't either.

If you could sleep on a plane, that's no fucking drunk. with three whiskeys and the Xanax not be new new time is like in sleeping or just like passing out pass the fuck out does it really matter whatever who gives the fuck the little guy next to you touches your dick while you're sleeping and you could

fucking charge it when international fucking dick touching and up in the air who knows I don't know the touring aspect of your life and Rudy's and anybody else walked into the studio has been those year tours.

It's long-ass-one. With a two-week break. In between. That's crazy. Those are brutal, dude. That's crazy. Yeah. That second week, you're like, I don't want to go.

You really start contemplating, quitting a band. How much money are you having a banquet? Yeah. You do. How long can you live? You're like, I've got to go do this shit again with these lunatics. Yeah. So you don't even get to spend the night in a hotel most nights.

No, no, no. It depends. I mean, it's down a bus tour. Exactly. Or they run a fucking plane tour. And sometimes it's a combination of both. Like say we're doing a U.S. run for like six weeks or something, right? There will be times where we might have to fucking do a gig, go to the hotel for a couple of hours. Our hotel lobby call is like 2 or 3 a.m.

Take us to the airport to fly completely across the country to do a gig that night. to get back on a plane to go back to where we just came from. And it just depends on the routing of the tour. So there's shit where we're on a bus, but we have to break it up with flights in between and shit like that. And you're not sleeping. I mean, you're fucking, you know. You just did a fucking gig.

And then you go back to your hotel just to grab your shit, basically. Yeah. And then to go to the airport and go through all that bullshit, the security and all that shit. And then you're flying. And I can't sleep on a fucking flight. So I'm like awake for like four or five hours and then get up, do sound check, do interviews, do meet and greet, do the gig, and then do it again that night and then go fucking fly back again. People have no idea.

No. They really don't. No. They really don't know the work that happens when you get there and they don't appreciate the work that happens before you get there. More the last year more than ever. You know, you get Facebooks and you get. Twitter's and people tell you their stories and people real interesting. But once every 10 days you got this guy that thinks that this is a fucking duck walk.

I love those people. That's a vacation. I love those people. That they don't understand that there's a commitment in this, that they think that somebody picks up a phone and makes a call. They think that I never ran into this as much as the last six months to a year, that this is just, they're giving a way. way of lottery. The work that if they so if if you can look into a crystal ball and see the work

and the sleeping on couches and the living with no money that you could you're going to go through in the next 10 years on an average for you to do this. Most people wouldn't do this. What makes you over now when you get into something like send it you know what you got yourself in. So it's the passion. of it. I love these people that just think that they're just going to stroll up here with their good looks and Gail Manors

and fucking do what the fuck. It took years. Fuck, yeah. It takes years to get good at something. And then it takes another year, a couple years to learn how to navigate in that world. And then it takes two more years

to learn how to put the navigation and the talent to get it's such a fucking journey you know when you came in and you said that i never even thought about it from that perspective yeah very true you were a fan of this and now you're in this fucking band yeah looking over looking and out jorgensen going how the fuck did i get here like i was just a regular kid in that water village chasing lizards I mean, I'm in a very similar position. I was, I drove cross-country and I found podcasts.

Wow. And I've always been a huge fan of stand-up comedy. And not so much in the podcast anymore because we've done tons of podcasts. Yeah. But when I get to go to Joey's shows, it's crazy. Like, just even like being like backstage or, like, the fact that anyone knows who I am. Yeah. Blows my, like, it still freaks me out kind of.

I don't know I it's very it's very flattering but I'm always like I whenever Joey has the show he takes pictures at the end I try I stand close but I'm I never I'm never expected like I'm just gonna jump in right right right it's a very it's a it's a never anything that I would have because you planned it it seems like it not exactly with this band but you planned your

sure I would have never guessed this is where my life really yeah it's wow it's it's interesting hearing you talk it's cool I'm very jealous that you you had such a conviction and you knew i did you know i mean that's the one thing i got to say i don't know if i was just completely stupid or what but i i did have that conviction in that knowing that this was it for me and i think a lot of it had to do with my dad it was in my blood my dad used to be my dad was a singer in mexico in the 60s and he had a band and i still have his 45 which they released

which was like a number one hit single and like the mid-60s and shit like that. But he was a singer and I think that's where I got it from. And he never pushed me into it. And it was never anything that he was like, you know, hey, I want you to do that. If anything, it was almost like the opposite. Like he almost didn't want me to do it. But I think I was born with it. Like, I think it was just something that I had in me because, you know,

I would hear music from as early as I can remember up until I heard that Kiss Alive record. And that solidified that. I was going to go in this hard rock kind of, you know, genre. But I think that it was something I was born with. And it's something that even if it all ended today right now, I'd still be doing it. Like I would still be on a fucking some corner or something, fucking playing the guitar or some fucking bar, whatever,

just still doing it. Like it's not anything that you can just shut off, at least for me. you know, whether I'm up here or down here, it's, it's still here. So it's always going to be there for me, you know. And that's what's, that's what's, I think, pushed me so far. Um, in my eyes. Like I've, you know, I, I've made it kind of how you said earlier, you know, what's making it. Well, for me, it's creating writing music, fucking touring being, you know, sharing what I do with other people and shit like that to me that's making it like it on my terms i made it everything else that's happened the fucking grammy nominations the fucking this and that like dude that's icing on the

cake that's shit that you never think about you know what i mean like i never did fucking i'm a kid for me still i dude never in a million years what i fucking think oh you're gonna be it you know you're gonna be hanging out with tony bennett the fucking grammies you know talking shooting the shit with him and and you know dude it's just shit that you never think it's going to happen. You know, this motherfucker knew I was from East L.A. And I ate tamales from the garbage can. Will he still talk to me?

Did you? Oh, dude. I always say that to myself. Dude. Always. All the time. Come up to me. Like, Lee was saying a lot of people bring their families.

Yeah, I know. They bring their moms. And I'm like, if your mom knew that I robbed a little cancer kid chain box one time from a carvel store, would they still be hugging? Yeah, yeah. No, I do. I do think that. All these victims of the art that you did

To get the music and pain to talk about on stuff Whatever the fuck that whatever drives us to do Listen, when I got into this I didn't get into this to be on TV Sin not at all Yeah I didn't get into this to be in the movies And I was running on the options

Since I was running on the options And I liked the lifestyle Yeah And I understood what they were doing. Make people laugh. I do that for free. Yeah, yeah. I do it on the corners every day.

I do you think I get the front eight balls because I come to your house, tell you I need money. You'd say no. Next to you know, I get your laughing. Next to you know, you're like, all right, all right. I can't give you an eight ball, but I give you a gram of a half. And I got you with laughter. It's the same thing.

Yeah. I didn't know what laughter felt like to people. And a lot of times I have to remember the laugh. and I really appreciate it like now. The first 10 or 12 years of comedy, I forgot what laughter was. So when people would talk to me about it, I didn't understand what they were saying.

I was going through a divorce. I lost a fucking child through a divorce. I didn't get to talk to it. But now I genuinely like to laugh. And it reminds myself what I do to people. And that is better than money, better than anything. Like, I don't give a fuck about it. I never didn't.

I don't want a Mercedes. I want to do. fucking Subaru hatchback. Whether I got $10 or $2,000, I got a Subaru hatchback, bro. That's just the way it is. They give me the most value from my dollar. I work hard for my dollar.

Planned and simple. You follow me? But that's what this was for me. And I've been realizing lately that I'm in it for 25 years that the fucking journey, the journey has been so fucking mind-boggling. the only regret I had is that I didn't put a computer chip in my brain at a camera

to establish all the thoughts and all the different things because there's so much you forget. Yeah. Maybe because you want to tuck away. Sure. Yeah. Now, that's the journey, I think, is one of the most beautiful things, man, that a lot of people don't know, don't appreciate and don't get and we'll never get. And it's what got you to where you're at right now, man.

The twists and turns and the you thinking, okay, well, I'm going to try this or I'm going to try that and it not going the way you thought. But then this other thing happened. And that I always find interesting when I talk to people. And like when I love watching documentaries on shit where they really talk about that kind of shit and what you know the the different avenues that they had to take to get to where they're at i always find interesting you know what i mean it's that journey me too i love all that shit yeah because you know it's like the more you fail at little things just for trying them the higher

success rate gets in a way i don't know how to explain that so it's dumb but that's how it's always felt like to me like i look back at all the things i did like i'm trying to outline a chapter from 95 to like 2040 a day, just fucking around. And it was a no festival. I was at the no festival. Everything was fucking no. Everything was no. Who would tolerate that?

And then I got mad TV. I got like a movie. I got basketball in 98th. And it was like every time I was about to really shit on myself, I would get a sign. Not a big sign, a little sign, you know, like two days on a movie. Really? And you got a line?

Come on. Wow. Come on. They want me as an extra. Stop pulling my leg. Nah, here's the line, you know. And it's like these little things that keep you alive for six months. Even though you're eating tuna, even though your friend let you at 40 bucks, you just know it.

You just know something. You know, that's the fucking best feeling in the world from all this. Absolutely. I wouldn't have had nowhere to go. Like, if I fucked up here in LA, that's it. That would have been it. Where else can you go do comedy? Where are you going to do?

New York and banging out there and until when? You're going to eventually have to be here for something. And they're going to go, that's the guy that robbed a comedy store. Dude, and I got to say, the first time I saw you was it flap? in Burbank. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I go over there.

With fucking, with Felipe. Years ago. Yeah. Years ago. That, that was my introduction to you. And I was there.

It might have even, I don't know if it was a New Year's. Yes. It was New Year's. It was something like that. It was New Year's. And I was fucking sitting there, man. Front row.

And you fucking came on. I didn't know who you were. and dude i was fucking completely floored i was just like who the fuck is this is this guy is fucking amazing i was nuts and my wife was pregnant she was just about to have the kid and i had been home for 10 days straight i was about to stab somebody that night i could tell you and philippe called me and said come down and do 10 minutes dog us i'm staying all night Dude, and I mean, I just got to say, you fucking killed, you blew me away, dude. Blew me away.

And, I mean, from that point on, I've just been a fucking fan, dude, like huge fan, dude. So, I mean, my hat off to you, dude. Thank you. Amazing, dude. Yeah, I go off at Flappers. It's a conservative club. So I go up there extra heavy-footed the first 30 seconds to really throw them off the boat. They have no idea.

They're talking about Disneyland the next day. And I go in there. I love it. You know, it's a psychological of it. Yeah. It's like if I took ministry and put them in a place where the beach boys played. Right.

Like Hendricks opening for the monkey. Yeah, that type of shit. You know what I'm saying? Like, it's like that. Like, you got to go out there and let them know. This is what this room's about. Exactly. Now, do you do all these solo projects?

Yeah. I, um, I mean, I do. a lot of session work to this day. And I also do like from time to time I'll do like my own side things. Like right now I got this this old school power metal project called Three Headed Snake that I'm recording an EP for right now. And that is Old school. Three songs. Old school fucking like I did like you know old school priest kind of sounding shit. You know what I mean? And it's just for fun. Like it's just for fun. Like it's I happen to have some time.

And I've been, I'd written these songs a few years ago, and I got this amazing singer. And so we're tracking that right now, actually. And we should have that done probably in February by next month. So I always do shit to keep me busy. And, you know, I'm always doing, like I said, sessions. And other artists and bands always hit me up to, like, you know. When you do sessions, you go down like Capitol Records and shit like that?

Anywhere, man. Yeah, anywhere there's a studio that wants me and... They pay you. Oh, yeah. No input, just play the fucking guitar and go. Both. Both. Yeah, yeah, I'll do both.

I'll do, like, some bands, they're like, hey, man, can you write something for this? You know, and they'll give me, like, a basic idea they have. And I'll write the guitar parts. If they want a solo, I'll do that, blah, blah, blah. Other times, it's just, here are the parts, but we want you to play these parts. and stuff's already written and then I just, you know, basically add my shit to it

but it's already written. So it's both. I get both. Yeah. Interesting dude, bro. Yeah, man. No, that was an education before on the couch.

We should have fucking taped that. But it was the same thing. I get high with Lee and we forget shit. You should have heard him. You should have heard Joey earlier when I was talking to him when you realized that I've been and clean and sober my whole life.

Oh, you know what I was just going to say? Because you looked great. I, as a musician. I thought you dropped the phone when we were talking early. No, no, no, no, no. As a musician, you're around everything, you know. Yeah. And I could see somebody going, I've never done this,

but I do drink and smoke pot in time to time. You said you're completely never had a drink. Nothing. I've never had a sip of beer. Never smoked anything. Why? No beef, no nothing here. No.

I'm very, I totally. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'm, and I'm the same way, man. Honestly, the God honest truth is I've never been curious about that stuff. I never got curious about that stuff. That's like if I had to say one thing, that's the thing. The second thing, which is going to sound very uncool and very rock and roll, is I remember early on my mom having a conversation with me and her telling me, you know,

because she could see that this is where I was headed. And I remember her saying, you know, you're always going to have my support. I'm always going to back you, whatever you want to do. You want to do this. Just don't get involved in like drugs and alcohol and stuff like that. That was it. It wasn't like a big, heavy, you know, set you aside and we're going to have this time. It was nothing like that. That's the only other thing I could sort of, think that I always carried with me. And other than that, I mean, there really is no other big reason. I've been around it.

Oh, my God. Dude, I mean, shit, you know, man. Dude, I go on the road, my pockets are full of shit that people give me. And, and, and yeah, I just, I've never been curious about it, man. Just never anything I was ever, like, not a sip of beer, man. I have no idea. Beer is overrated. I mean, a lot of people are going to get mad.

It's like it's an, what is it called, a taste you have to, like, you have to grow to like. It's an acquired taste. It's an acquired taste. But, and, you know, also knowing, I have a very addictive personality. So I kind of, I know that if I, if I did something and I liked it, I would like the shit out of it. And I would probably be one of those guys. Who the fuck knows that I have an addictive personality of 14? What are you addicted to?

Let me get a tissue, if you don't mind my life. Oh, just, you know, like, let's just say I. I know. But like, did you know at 14? I did, man. You like it? I did. You know, I just knew that whatever I liked, there was no middle ground for me.

It was just like, you know, I either hated it or I fucking love the shit out of it. And I just had a feeling. I was like, all right, well, I'm not really curious about this stuff. But if I ever, if I did do it and I did like it, I would probably be the guy that just went. completely off the deep end with it. And I did sense that early on. Yeah. You know, I like soda when I was a kid.

I loved this shit out of soda. If you offered me a water in your house. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh, what I get offended? What, no soda? Right. I'll take juice there and Kool-Aid last.

But you don't offer me water. You know what I'm saying? That's the order. Yeah. I ain't got no soda, but I got a nice juice. Let's do some juice. Right. We ain't got no juice, but we got Kool-Aid.

The cherry one, what? What? But I don't know. I never thought about it like that at that age. Yeah. I was very shy with marijuana used for my first year. Yeah. I did not want it to get out.

I was very, especially around my martial art friends. I did not want them to know I did any type of marijuana. Yeah, yeah. For me to break loose from that, I had to stop hanging out with them and shun them out completely. And look what you got me. If I was to stay with my little faggy karate friends, I would have been a Marine right now,

retired and done something with my life. But no, I chose to hang out with the dirty kids to listen to the lunatic skinning, and lighten fires and the woods and shit like that. Dude, I still remember the first time I saw bong. I was jamming at a buddy's house when I was like 12 or 13 up in the Burbank Hills. and we're sitting around in this guy's garage

and they were all like three or four years older than I was and we were just fucking playing like priest covers or whatever the fuck we were playing and all of a sudden the drummer was the it was his house he stops and he's like I'm gonna take a break and we all just kind of sat down and I remember them breaking out this fucking bong that like lit up like had a light and shit like that

and I remember just sitting there and I was going what the fuck is that like I didn't even know what the fuck it was dude and fucking like they're like passing this shit around and I was like what the fuck and I just I remember it got to me and I just like pass it to the next guy but like I remember that shit and I not knowing what the fuck what was the first time you saw cocaine or heroin how old was I probably 18 shooting it is right here snorting okay yeah I saw shooting probably early 20s and it traumatizes you oh dude Jesus Christ Oh, I don't. Jesus Christ. Brutal, dude. I saw that shit as like a child,

like running up a flat of stairs to call for a friend. Then you get to the third floor and there'd be a guy with his head down. Yeah. With the needle in his arm to sleep. Yeah. And you got to walk past this guy fucking horrendous. Yeah. Then it was like an epidemic in New York.

And I used to go to my aunt's house. Sorida, the lady I told the story about Comptomy Central. There was always a guy shooting in the hallway. I mean, he was like a flower. Like, you know, when you walk into a building, there's a plant on the floor. Always there. He was always there with the rubber around his arm, and he would be pushing it in. And I would look at him for, like, a split second, because that shit makes me faint.

And I'd just run up the stairs. It was fucking horrible, horrible, horrible. Yeah. I can't imagine being a young kid and not, like, I was a real. around as a kid I knew and a chit-chat. Yeah. But to see it, for somebody to whip it out in front of you one time, what the fuck are you doing?

It's fucking brutal, man. I mean, I've seen, fuck, did, every fucking thing you can imagine. I mean, been around a bit in rooms, guys that I used to play with, and, you know, just everywhere, dude. It was always around me, always. I think I know maybe like two or three guys in the music scene that have never touched. anything like at all. Other than that, everyone has.

And I mean, that's cool. I'm not like, you're never getting to judge anybody. Yeah. It's weird, the extreme that you go to. Yeah. Listen, if it wasn't for heroin, we would have no Allison change. Exactly.

Yeah. Thank God for H. You know, they gave us for Alice, Alice in chains, you know. Dirt is brilliant. Dirt is a fucking masterpiece. The one before that, jars. What is it?

What was it? They have something. Some jar. Yeah. The masterpieces, and these guys were fucking drooling all over themselves. Losing teeth and shit. Are you fucking crazy losing teeth? Why does heroin make you lose teeth?

I don't know. Maybe you forget to brush your teeth. I have no fucking idea, but I'm just saying. It just happens, man. Once a tooth goes, I think it's time to fucking change your perspective and shit. Oh, my God. What was the other musicians response to this? Like, how much grief did you get early on?

You know, not as much as, as you would think. That's pretty cool, actually. Yeah, it was, it was weird. I don't know if it was just because I was, it was just, they saw the conviction for me. And it was never an issue. I never really got like any shit for it. Like, people just early on be like, oh, you don't do this, whatever. Like, it was just, that was it.

It was never like, you know, I never got any real bullshit for it. And with ministry, I mean, Al, you know, no secret. He was did everything, man. I mean, he was, you know, on heroin. And, I mean, he hit the rock bottom before he cleaned up. And, yeah, I mean, we talk about that shit. He's one of those dudes, Al Jorgensen, that nobody talks about. Mm-hmm.

But he's been there, back. Yeah. There and back already. Yeah. you know that guy to sit him down it would take you 10 years to pick his fucking brain what he knows he had hits he knows what it is to fucking and be at the very top and at the very bottom and he knows what to be at the very bottom and you know what he's never stopped and you have to look at that and go wow that count for something in my fucking book absolutely i don't know about your book

but that count for something in my book fuck yeah you know all these bands now that are coming back to play whatever it is whatever they're coming back just the fact that they're coming back they're giving the opportunity you know what do you do what are you doing what are you doing you're 66 what are you doing you're 64 you look as good as you do

you can still move around and stage around at least for two hours you can do this shit and take your tongue out and you know you can't do it every night can't do it four nights a week but you can still pop out two of those you have the opportunity

you're 66 yeah You go, you go back on the bread diet, you dye your hair, you get a young girlfriend, you give her a deuce a week to get the old scum out of your suck nutsack, to get that nutsack working like it used to when you were 40. That's all you need. You go to fucking CVS, you get some Nugetics. It only costs 200 a week? What's that? It only costs 200 a week to have the girl over? No, you find yourself a Harvey Weinstein lepto.

Somebody who's on the shit list and they're willing to do whatever they need to do to make this more. 300 and they come over four days in polish your knob your 69, your practice they'll tell you what to hide you know, send you're 70 hide your ass cheeks get some me on these, just show them your dick

you know what I'm saying? Hide your nuts act. You don't want to put your nuts in their mouth that might die. Yeah, by the time you're 70 you put your nuts in a woman's mouth they'll just die. They just die. They just die. That's like eating one of those fruits

in fucking Jamaica you just fucking die what's your website buddy uh sincuren dot com is the website what can i find that you got everything tour dates yeah yeah everything tour dates everything that we're doing

you're a very interesting fucking dude bro thank you man from the heart very interesting i appreciate that i like this whole east l.a thing that how you guys what's your relationship of war oh dude of course Jesus of course i would have died

Many times, dude. These motherfuckers used to walk around here. Dude, they were just, yeah, they were like a gang, dude. They were like, there were just dudes walking around in the scene, dude. And I, you know, the last time I got to say, the last time I saw them, Eric Burden came up and did spill the wine with them. And I was like, holy fuck, dude, because that's like one of my all-time favorite songs. That is, dude, spill the wine, dude.

And let's see if we got to. Eric. Yeah. What's the name of it? Let's close with that. Spill the wine. Spill the fucking jam. That's the jam.

And a half. Yeah. Listen, brother, you have an open door here. Thank you, man. Anytime you want to come in, I know you're right down the corner. Yeah, man. Drop in, talk shit for an hour. Sounds good.

You're the man of steel. It's been a real pleasure. I'm pissed. I don't know you early. How back do you go? How far back to go with Rudy? Well, Rudy, I met for the first time just a couple of years ago. But, I mean, you know, known of him for, you know, from fucking back in the day, man, I've been following at Katz since early 80s.

So, but we met for the first time. We did, we did the Randy Rhodes remember jam up at the Canyon Club. And, uh, I did suicide solution with fucking Rudy, dude, on base. And I was, you know, a death. That's a highlight for me, dude, you know, to do that shit. Plicking plain Randy stuff with Rudy up on stage. It was fucking crazy. We had Stephen Perkins, I think, from Jane's Addiction, played drums on that.

So it's a fucking blast, man. Yeah. And we'll get into the fucking Nancy Road School down the corner here. That's amazing. Absolutely. Yeah. That's just, I heard his mom had a guitar school in Burbank. Delors.

Yeah. Burbank, North Hollywood, right in the border. But she lived, Andy, or Randy was from Burbank, went to John Muir Jr. High, which is the same junior high I went to. And I remember I used to go to my old, the junior high library and look up the old yearbooks to see pictures of Randy in there while I was like going to that same school and shit. So that was a big Randy Rhodes fan. You know, I was a big Sabbath fan. Ozzy left.

God knew what was going to happen. And I was in the village and I saw the EP, the first EP, four songs. And I was done. Yeah. He had taken that event handling and stepped on him. Absolutely. It's like he just stepped. Except on that.

Yeah. It was a whole different. It was a whole different fucking genre. Yeah, dude. We'll get into that next time. For sure, man. Uplac said anytime you want to come on. You know my number here.

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sprinkling your asshole to death. Anyway, I want to thank Hello Tushy. I want to thank Miandis. I want to thank Sin Kieran.

Kareen. From the beautiful band ministry, drop some knowledge on us. I don't want to thank all you motherfuckers and get ready. Charlotte,

sharpen your helmet. Uncle Joey's coming to town. I don't want to eat no fucking bullshit. when I get there. Stars, everything. Sugar the pills.

We're doing everything. So show up early. Get your tickets and stop fucking around. We're throwing some fucking heat this weekend. You understand me? Stay black. Let's get that spilled of wine. Hit that girl one more time for fucking sing.

I love you, fucks. Have a great weekend. I love you, motherfuckers.