The Church of What's Happening Now: The New Testament - #601 - Dean Delray

Episode Date: July 18, 2018

Dean Delray, comedian, actor seen on "Maron," and the host of the "Let There Be Talk" podcast, joins Joey Diaz and Lee Syatt LIVE in studio. This podcast is brought to you by:    FujiSports.com  - Use promo code CHURCH for a 10% discount on all the best jiu jitsu and martial arts gear.   Onnit.com. Use Promo code CHURCH for a discount at checkout.    Recorded live on 07/17/2018.
  

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You know what I'm saying? Kick that fucking mulee. Yeah. It's a special live album presentation. You betcha you have to you one time. The nice, nice, nice, nice, nice, nice, nice, a nice, nice, nice, nice, nice, nice to do national, Tennessee.

I do, find, fine, double time. All mine, there's been rock and roll. We're here, a bit of there, a bit tomorrow, and the matter of there. We've got to do it, we got to do it, we got to have it right now. We got to do it. We've got to do it.

We've called all on the paper to you. You get me talking at you. I say I think I think I say I know that ain't nobody out there came to be mellow tonight now did you I say I say that I say there ain't nobody I'll say there ain't nobody not out there that even wants to be a little bit mellow now he's there That's how we're doing this motherfucker tonight That's how we're doing the church tonight It's good for them. It's a good scene. It's it's a love song I'd like to dedicate this to all that Nashville pussy

Fuck yeah The little love song called Wang Dang Sweet Boot Are you fucking getting me Or what The Church of what's happened now July 20

Oh shit Dean Del Rizzi Yeah The Christ killer A Wang Dang Go to Sweet Boots 10 Look at clean Jesus Christ

That's from live music Oh You know the I was talking to Dean on the phone We were talking about that I had gotten high about two, three weeks ago. One night I was home and I stayed up late and I listened to, you know, it just was on the playlist. If you want blood, you got it. Yeah.

And I just fell to my fucking, like, I forgot. And then Gino Kachino, maybe, the kid from Austin. Right, yeah. Said something, like two days later, out of the blue. Like, if he was living, I've been going crazy. Like, sometimes, that's why we called you today. because sometimes I'll go, shit, I got to call Dean Dowery

and ask him if he's going to go to Kansas City with me and then two days later, the phone will ring and Dina go, hey man, I'm excited about going to Kansas City with you and I'm like, wait a second. Did I even call Dean? So I've been slipping. Like, I remember what I did in the third grade, but I know what I ate for lunch.

I hear you. If I don't look at my Weight Watch app, I don't know what I ate for fucking lunch. Like, I had to think where I had breakfast today. Yeah. And today was Tuesday. So today I went over to Marie T. Because I don't have to do nothing

to fucking, I had a meeting at 10. That was it. So I remember when I said, let me go to Marie E.T. early, I went and started writing before the guy showed up just because, you know. What's happening, Dean Del Rizzi? Fucking out here with the candles lit, dude. Fucking New York.

How long are you back there for? 40 days. 40 long days, like a Moses run. Did 53 spots. 53 spots. And they got a new, the stand's got a new spot. They haven't heard. Yeah, they haven't.

They moved two blocks away. 16th in Irving. They're going to be open, I believe, in September, and it's going to be twice the size. And they're going to have a second room and do, like, live podcasts and stuff. So it'll be cool. Right across street from Irving Plaza, that venue.

Yeah, yeah, that venue there. It's so funny how all these comedy clubs are going to open up 2020 friendly now. Yeah. They've got podcasts. I mean, downstairs to the comedy store. It's going to see you got now. It's fucking like they're going for it.

Yeah, they are. They're going for it. I love it. We're going for it. I can't blame them. I can't be mad at you from going for it. No way, man. You got to stay in the game, man.

Comedy's so hot. You got to have your pan in the river. Maybe I just haven't been around it long enough, but I've known Joey for seven years. Isn't it kind of rare that a new comedy club will pop up and like everyone loves it? I haven't heard anyone say a bad thing about the stand. Well, they're not new. I think, I don't know how long. I think it was six years or something.

yeah, they're new for, you know, in a short amount of time, but they've been around for a while. And they, you know, I think that they did was they grabbed on to the guys that are coming up, you know, and then those guys exploded like, you know, Big Jay, Ari, you know, Joe List, Mark Norn. These guys all sudden are just everywhere, and it's kind of a perfect storm. It's then in the club and boom, you know. It's very weird when you see a music venue. have a hot summer. Right.

You know, like when I was a kid, the palladium would have hot summer schedules, you know, like you would look at it and go, Jesus fucking Christ. Yeah. And that's what, you know, the comedy seller, the stand, you know, you know, I don't know if anybody even goes to Dangerfields. Yeah, I've never been there. I did the seller and the stand, you know. When you talk to anybody, does anybody go, I'll catch you later, Dean. I have to go to Dangerfields.

I hear some guys working there. I just haven't been there. I worked a new room there that Burr turned me onto called West Side Comedy up in the upper 70s up there. And it was cool, you know. How many clubs are there in New York? Oh, shit. Dude. I can't even count them.

You know? How many people? How many different neighborhoods? Yeah. You know, how many, just if you had, you could have two clubs in each borough. Yep. which you basically in New York City you've got 10 or 15 clubs

maybe even 20 clubs from the village all the way up to 1 in 80 there's got to be 20 fucking places absolutely that's conservative that's way wrong I could be way wrong yeah Staten Island has to have clubs Jersey has the stress factory

the Borgata Vinnie's catch is Katz still in Jersey I don't know but they're building that other the new one that guy that has the in the mall of America he's building one in Jersey he's building one in Jersey City by giant stadium yeah by giant stadiums

I think he's no he's going more Route 440 or something like that yeah that's going to be fucking crazy that's gonna be great I'm trying to get the new theater in Union City oh wow there's a there's a theater in Union City that Carlin did when I was a kid yeah no way across the street

from a fucking diner called the four star diner yeah let me tell you I've been busting out BLP's in that motherfucker because it's 1970 fucking two. They got the best BLT. When I was a kid, they had a tremendous BLT, tremendous chick. It was just one of those fucking diners, you know?

And my mom would stop there. Like, if everything else failed, I could always count on a BLT. My mom would wake me up with a BLT from the four-star fucking diner. There was always a hair in your food. Yeah, yeah. The French fry always had like long black hair. Like somebody tried to tie a note to your French fry.

Help. Help, they got me back here. Under minimum wage. Oh, fucking tremendous those French rides. But no, my buddy works, and he said that to go to the Union City Pax Center instead of getting killed in New York. I could care less. I just don't want to pay $25,000 to advertise in a theater.

That's what they wanted in New York. They were trying to gouge me out of the fucking eyes. I'm like, no, you people fucking crazy. Oh, man. They're just crazy in New York. The unions are fucking crazy. They are crazy. They're crazy.

Yeah. You know, you go to these other theaters and you make a little bit of money. You go to a theater in New York. You're like, I got to sell how many to do what? Well, most people do it, but they do three shows. Three fucking shows? And then I'll make money. Fuck it.

I'll go to fucking Delaware. Yeah, yeah. You know what I go to Delaware. I'd rather come home with an envelope than not come home with no money at all. I played the theater last week. That's great. Yeah. But you made three fucking dollars.

Everybody's jumping up and down. They took your fucking money, you asshole. It's crazy, man. It really is fucking crazy. It's crazy. I remember I was in a theater there, I sat in a guy's seat and they go, that's, that's a union chair, dude. You can't, you can't get, you got to move over here.

I was like, well, what the fight? I just, I just got off stage, man, I'm sitting down. One of the union guys' chairs. Where was this? It was some theater there. In New York? Yeah, yeah. By yourself, you were doing it.

No, I was doing with some other guys, you know, it's just one of those things that just like, hey, that's a union, uh, it was when I was playing music. That's what it was. You know, it's a union guys. Which room was that? Fuck. It's one of those rooms. It's a union guy's chair, man.

Can't sit there. You know, it's, when I first got into music, one of my first albums that I turned on was get you yaya's out. No, it's great. One of the first live albums I ever bought. That's like Marin's favorite. And I looked at it, I'm like, what the fuck is this? Yeah, the cover?

The cover's great. With the tambourine or a mule and American hat or something? I don't even remember. It's like Charlie Watts on a mule. something crazy. That snare drum or something? I'm looking at this fucking album and listening to it and I'm like,

this is the worst album. This is not what I fucking bought. And I took the album off, put it in this case, and I put it in my stack albums. And I never really told nobody what I felt. People come up and me and go, it's a great album.

And I'm like, that guy's a fucking sucker. Yeah. And then I forgot what the second that live album I bought was, that again, I was not very fond of. I'm like, the music don't sound the same. What the fuck is this shit? Yeah. This is terrible.

I was the same way growing up. Terrible. The singing too, yeah. Horrible. This is God off. I'll never, ever buy a fucking live album again or something. I was done with them. Yeah.

And then I started going to concerts. You know, like I went to see arrows, Ted Nuge and Mahogany Rush, and, you know, I went to see Sabbath. And I think, like, by... By the time I... I saw ACDC at the garden opening up for TED. Yeah. That's when it all hit me.

That's when I got it, that they were free flowing. This wasn't a studio. I was so used to the studio version. Yeah, right. That when I would listen to the live version, I would go, this is fucking God awful. This is God awful. And I would like the guy, like,

and you'd be like, it's a great album. I'd be like, I want to choke this fucking guy. Because he's mummified. He's got to be retarded. He's not right with this. fucking guy. But no, that's what it was. I didn't appreciate the freedom of live

performance. I was the opposite with comedy records. Remember there was somewhere the guys would just go in the studio and do the bits? Really? Yeah, remember those? They were weird. There would be no audience or anything? Well, you knew there was a lap track. Yeah. You could hear a lap track. Yeah, it was like, what is this? It was like a TV lap track.

Yeah, and you're like, this is kind of funky. And then you get a real comedy record, like a prior one. And you go, oh, this is the shit right here. you know so to me I live records was my my pretty much introduction to music you know like I got kiss alive too was the first one and I was like this is amazing man you can hear the guys talking stuff that's what was weird that was one album that I liked right off the bat see that's weird but I like kiss alive yeah I like kiss alive by that by 76 whenever 75 I was starting I'm lying I'm starting to get it a little bit I just

just didn't I didn't get the song and Maine is the same. Yeah. To years later that I listened to interviews and I heard them on, I heard Plant on the that fucking Sunday night show that was big for 30 years. In fact, I bumped into the guy.

He lives in Studio City. Oh, wow. A hundred years old. Oh, the interview guy? Yes. Oh, I worry about his house. Rockline or whatever? No, not rock line. There's something rock hour. I used to be on Sunday nights. Oh, what is And he used to interview fucking rockers on Sunday nights.

I loved all that shit. Yeah, I did too. King biscuit flour. Oh, yeah. That's the shit, dude. Sunday nights and do your shit. Yeah, I love that. King biscuit flower hour.

When I heard him on there, I heard Robert Plant tell a story about that Jimmy Page had done everything he could to a guitar except give it ahead. And then I went, I watched the song of me as the same. Yeah. And I kind of started. liking then I went on a fucking live album tear yeah and the one that really took me over was one for the road oh man that took me to a different level and now but then one day and I'll never forget that some kid flipped me a cassette I'll never forget this kid's name and then he goes hey man we were in that you know like in the middle of day you have a study all for 45 minutes yeah we were in study all

together and he had to be like one chair away from me and he just looked over him he said man I got something for you I go what is and he goes he gave me the cassette to unleashed in the east oh man and I looked at it at first you know what Judas priest means right right Jesus Christ yeah yeah so I looked at it and the Catholic faggy side of the judge he has looked at and said yeah I'm not listening to this shit is this Christian rock yeah no no I'm like I'm not listening to this yeah no matter what you tell me. First off, I'm too much into Sabbath to

even be that type of fucking hypocrite. Yeah. It's bad enough. I'm into Zeppelin and Sabbath. I'm cheating on fucking Zeppelin with Sabbath. It's bad enough. Yeah. It's bad enough. I'm cheating on fucking Zeppelin with Sabbath. Now you want me to cheat on fucking Sabbath with this other fucking hypocrite

hypocrisy. This Jesus Christ, this Judas priest that's unleashed in the East. Again, you bring that home and you hear fucking, you know, you're in for a surprise you're in for a shock all that's shit I don't you like town streets I didn't know what the fuck to think oh my god now now I had a little bit under my belt there was a store in union city called east west yeah and what they were really really known for was their bootlegs

albums out of the garden oh badass I love you did the garden and you got bootlegged east west which is still there but let's see what east west looks like How the fuck in a head shop? The kid's debt, I think that the guy who owns it was in a band. Is it a Union City or is it in Brooklyn? Union City. It's called East West Head Shop. Yeah, we had the same thing.

Record Vault. Guy had all the live stuff, all the time. You'd be like, whoa, I was at this show? I still remember him buying Bonzo's birthday party. Gonzo? Bonzo. Bonzo's birthday party. Oh, yeah.

Oh, I got that one. It's got the pig on the cake. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's so great. East West has been there since I was a fucking kid. 1971. In fact, in 82.

There, look at that guy. Look at that. Look at that. In 82, I bought a fucking crack, how to make fucking crack pipe. Freebase. Oh, yeah, free base. They had a fucking freebase kit. Wow.

For 4995 with the glass, the fucking silk handkerchief. Look at what it says, rock and roll super store. Yeah, no, no. How fucking great is that? You go to the city. Oh, I'm going there. You take the shell across. It'll drop you right off.

You go right to 48th Street. This has been there since I was a fucking kid. Wow. Un- fucking believable. Now, that's in Jersey? That's in Jersey, right? Wow. Yeah, New Jersey.

All right. Wow, look at that guy. Let's see the store. Press the store link there. Fucking cool, man. Puff company. See what it says there. But they would sell.

That's what they would. Smoke shop. Same shit. Oh, look at that, man. One of those fucking other. Look at the condoms. Hazel eye ring. Oh, look at these bongs and stuff.

Great. That's just the old school store. They had one of those, like in the mall where I live, and you go there and get black-eyed posters and, you know, rock t-shirts. Speaking of which, what do you think about the poster? Yeah. Fucking great, dude.

Hang it behind me and switch. I think so. It's so glorious. So I know you guys are both doing great. But whatever. store might have been for you, Dean, does any part of you wish, like, in another universe, you're running a store like this? I would give my right hand to move to a small city right now where I could get an office like this and surround myself with vinyl. Yeah. Play music all day,

and people could come and buy vinyl and trade vinyl and then have like a, like you come, stay with me for a week. If I could find a small village in the Midwest of, where that would be my retirement job. Yeah, just fucking chilling with your vinyl and bowling shop. You know, I wouldn't even do the bonds and I don't want to go to jail. Yeah, yeah. I could do it clean just with hours.

Just buying out. Just going out to flea markets, buying albums, get 3,000 ounces. Yeah. Put them out there. It's not going to cost you a lot of money. Then have like black eye posters. Yeah, black eye posters, you know, and talk to people. Yeah.

The most important thing is to communicate with people, Let people let you know that, listen, I'm really looking for the first sound garden, which, what's it? Ultra Mega. Ultra Mega, okay. I'm looking for that in vinyl. Now you got a customer. You know what? Let me call Kichi and Kichi.

You know that place up in Bakersfield? You're like, go up there, see if they got that. Tell me what they want, what number are. Yeah. What's he want? 280. Hold on. Let me call this guy.

Can I get $4.50? Yeah. I'll give you $500. We just made fucking, that's how you do it. Yeah, yeah. And that's people who want something. Yeah. They want it.

Middleman stuff. You know, when you go to, let me tell you something, man, that place is moving in Hollywood. Amoeba. Amoeba. Yep. They rake it up in Amoeba. Oh, good. They rake it up.

You know how I know they rake it up? Because they took me for a couple fucking hundred thousand dollars. Yeah. They've taken me for some money over the years. Let me tell you some, I don't fuck with Omiba. Yeah. I just don't. And I love it.

I don't care going in there and paying $20,000. more or something. Sometimes I'll tell my wife, is she eBay's something? Yep. Like I got to, but let me tell you something. I found the Cuban Al one time on eBay for a yardstick.

I said, let me not buy this. I walked home even the next day they had it for $9.95. So, you know, it's either or it's what you'll pay for it. Absolutely. It's what you'll pay for it. Absolutely.

I go in there and I look at the hard-to-get wall. I don't even go into the peasant area. You know what I mean? with the peasants. I'm there in there, mealing, like, grazing and shit. I just go look at the jewels, I call him up on the wall, like, oh, fuck. There's Oct-Tong baby unopened. Well, there's Diva's first album, Blue Vinyl. No, it's crazy. He's crazy. I go crazy. If you're a music nerd, you know, going to those places, when I go to those places, the problem I have is, I have is like to talk to the guy. Yeah. But I know if you talk to something, you got to buy

something. Right. You know, I don't mind talking to a guy. If, you know, I don't mind talking to a guy if he knows what the fuck he's really talking about and he's passionate about it. I like even this guy here in Burbank where I go. Yeah. He's passionate. That little white nerdy dude with the glasses, that dude knows his shit. I've seen him argue with people. Yeah. I've seen them do some crazy

shit in there. I love all that stuff. You know, like I told people for years, you call me a motherfucker and a fat fucking thousand times. I probably won't do nothing to you. Get involved with music and get me hot under the collar. Yeah. I get hot under the collar. When I was a kid, I would get hot under the collar. Oh, yeah, yeah.

Like when Van Halen first busted out, people were using the Van Halen car. I wanted to kill those motherfuckers. And then when Van Halen 2 came out, a lot of people didn't like that one. Yeah. We were all hating on them. We were all waiting for him to crash and burn. Yeah, dancing out of the way, that's disco. Yeah, once they did, no, once they did the poster one that he had his chains.

Oh, yeah, that was that women and children. Oh, that was it. I was so happy. I showed everybody the poster. This is the guy you want to fucking go into the Valley of Deathwood. Fuck him. Look on with Ozzy Oswald. I'm not going into with this fucking actual.

Then I ended up loving Van Allen. I ended up loving them. But in the beginning, I was a hater. When I seen them blow up, they blew out my fucking heroes. Oh, yeah, they blew them off the States. They destroyed my heroes in New York City. How can I fucking be a fan of these fucking people? What am I?

Your heroes were done by them, boy. Done. Just up there glazed. Done. Yeah, just fucking fried. What a weird concert to go to. What a weird night to see. It was like going to see your favorite baseball.

team. Yeah. Just in last place. No, no, no, no. They're in first place. Yeah. They got the best picture in baseball. You bet them for 10,000, and they just got beat 11 to 0 right

in front of you. Like that you didn't even, you couldn't. It was such a bad beating that you didn't even want to leave the stadium. Like your friends have like, come on, come on. You're like, no, no. Like, that's how bad. Like, I've been to some bad conscience and I was honest enough to

to them. See, most people go to something bad, but their investment is so much. Oh, they just sell theirself. It was great. It was great. Would you pay for the ticket? 600. Sure it was. It was great. It was one of the best concerts ever. You sure it did. Yeah. So, would you have heard, like, the number one single off of that album before you bought it or everything was the secret when you bought an album? There was no singles on the band's we're listening to. No. No, that shit's just, you just bought it because you loved the band. You didn't need to hear it. He just, just went there. There was no streaming or sampling or anything. He just went, oh, killer,

here it is. And you just left immediately with it. It's funny how if I got caught, like let's say I had to do something with my mom and Dean bought the album that I wanted. I'd go to, I'd ask Dean, Dean, what is it? How is it? You're like, oh, and I go, Dean's your mom? Oh, no, let's go over there right now. Yeah. And we'd run over there. And we'd run over there. at least listen to Side 1, and then I'd run and buy the album. And I'd feel shitty. Like, I feel shitty because everybody's going to buy the album, but still, I felt like I copied Dean.

Yeah, yeah. But it didn't matter. Everybody's going to buy the album. You got to have your own copy. You had to have your own fucking copy. Oh, fuck, yeah. But I always wanted the album first because I didn't want to feel like I was copying somebody. You know, one of the most brilliant stories I ever heard about music.

Believe it in that. one of the most cultivating stories I ever heard was Eddie Bravo. Yeah. Tell him the story about being a kiss fan and buying a kiss album and having to sneak at home. Oh, yeah. In front of your friends on the block because your friends go, hey, what did you just buy? Yeah. So he had to run around his backyard and jump the fence and hide the album under his bed and then come out.

You know, that's the kind of love that, like, people have for baseball teams. Yep. and basketball teams and football teams and that's a kind of love like i had like i'd love going to the record store like walking it was the best and everything on the walk was something like we're going to this place today but on the walk there there's a place called gilberto's like oh yeah it's always stops i got food yeah and then we're gonna stop with dean's house because dean's got weed so you wouldn't be there i imagine you'd be there at like 9 a.m and be like okay i don't want anyone else to get this i never went in the morning no no no no they had plenty of records

We would have breakfast with our families, and me, you and Dean would meet at like 11 of the morning and we'd smoke like that little joint. Ride the bus. I would ride the bus. We'd walk a mile or two first. There was always walking a mile. Totally. Oh, yeah, absolutely.

And then we wrote a bus. And then we bought the album. And sometimes we'd walk down Bergen line. You'd walk down. There was a little record store in like 70th Street. That's why I bought Sabotage. Yeah. The feeling of walking home with an album,

You can't wait. That you can't wait. You just cannot wait. Like when I go to a record, that album store now, and I find something like, you know, like this guy, one of the church guys, got me exile on Main Street. But when I found it the one day,

I almost had a fucking hard at that way. I couldn't wait to get home. I was like a kid, man. I know. I'm doing a bit about it right now. Oh, are you? Okay. I'm doing this bit where I'm saying, like,

you know, when I was, you know, now you just stream, but I didn't. get to hear music. If you didn't own a car, you didn't hear music to, you got home. You know what I mean? Like, you had to get home because there was no music. And then a walkman came out later on, and you would hear music on the way home, but then the batteries would die, and you couldn't hear music too. You could buy more batteries. That was fucked up, right? That was fucked when your battery started dying. It starts slowing down. Oh, you're like, oh, fuck, my walkman. And people would start

fucking disson you. Oh, yeah. Like if you had like one of those ghetto blasters, and you showed up and you're like, oh, I got the jam, and you put it on, and also the batteries started dying. Oh, yeah, right.

You were disgraced. You were, like, chucked in the neighborhood and shit, like, get out of here with that fucking boombox. Dead batteries, man. Dead batteries. And your music fucking listening would be over. What's the big batteries?

That cost you $18. D. D. D. Morrow. D. Radio Rahee. What do you mean? See? D.

D. Motherfucker. D. Gee. That's my favorite. Because I've seen pictures, but I don't think it was every car that had no, like, most cars didn't have an out, like a, a cassette player. Or not even, like, it's not even, like, it must have been like a fancy car had a vinyl in it. No, no vinyl. Cadillac had a year where they had a turntable in the glove box. Isn't that crazy? Like shock-mounted Cadillac or Oldsmobile, one of them.

Look it up. It looks crazy. You just opened. What year was this? Look it up. Look up a turntable in a car and it should come up and you had open the glove box and it was all spring loaded and you just set it in there and drive with LPs. Oh man, we got to see that. I've crashed the fucking car. I know, right?

You have a hard time with the radio. I can't imagine like I want to hear that again type shit. That'd be great, right? But it happened as it was like an Oldsmobile or Cadillac day. It was an option right in the glove box and you could buy it and they would put it in there there it is look see that look at that man right in the glove box 19s and 50s how fucking sick is that record players were the infratainment systems and the one christler my god chrysler i never ever saw this i never ever even seen this before i saw it at a car show and i was

like what the so you saw the car with this yeah yeah it was an oldsmobile or something and i was like what the hell is that with christler started dodge Plymouth. So it must have been like one of those big Chrysler's, you know, like, look, DeSoto or something. 1958. Badass dude. It had it in there and I was like, that's and it was shock mounted. It had like

kind of shock so you hit bumps. It just played. Look at that, dude. Unbelievable, right? They said there was only offered for two years. Yeah, well that's fucking cool as shit to have that in your ride. What's your, uh, all right?

What's your, uh, fucking, record, live record history. Oh, well, the first one I get is Kiss Alive 2. And I know, you know, Kiss Alive 2, it came with the tattoos, like stickers of the tattoos. It came with a tour book kind of thing that I cut up

and immediately put on the wall. And it had that famous photo of Gene Simmons on the front that I think is the best rock photo ever taken. It's the blue lighting with the blood coming off. That is stunning. So I got that first. And the side four is kind of a studio record. So it's three sides live and then some new studios and

it had like rocket ride. Baby wants a ride. Baby wants a ride. She wants a rocket ride. What year to kiss a live too come on? Seventy-seven. And one to 75. Yep. Right. Okay. Okay. 77's that one with the great gold stairs. With the great gold. Yes. And the tigers. That's the fucking kiss. They played Cal Palace that year. And the day they played, Elvis died.

So the bootlegs called rest in peace Elvis. Like August 1477. Yeah, whatever that day he died. That's the day they played the Caldust. August something. August 11th. Something. I was at superstar basketball camp.

Superstar basketball camp. Jersey City, New Jersey. August 16. There you go. Like a fucking savage that I am. And I got convicted August 15th of second degree burglary, 1988 and shit. So I got my shit tight. These are numbers.

These are numbers, bitches. See what I'm saying? I can remember when I got convicted, but I don't know when I have a breakfast. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't get my weight watcher out. Remember that I go to Marie T for break. Yes, I did. Yeah, I remember shit from them, but right now I don't remember shit too good.

No, something's going on. My head's just full of bits. The last fucking year, I've been noticing it. I talked to the doctor about it. Yeah. And he goes, dog, it's your three year, 36,000 mile warranty is up. You're 55, man. Those belts are worn out.

And it's funny, the expectations that people have from me, like, and not have from me. Yeah. Like, I had a dear, dear friend of mine, female in Jersey, asked me the weirdest fucking question. And I go, what would make you think something like that? She goes, just curious. Most of the guys I'm with, they don't work no more. Oh, wow. Like, shit just stops working.

Like, a friend of mine goes, how are your teeth? My teeth are great. Mine are too. People, like, say that they start complaining about their teeth. The only thing I can complain about my fucking vision. Oh, yeah, your vision, mine too. My vision is gone. It starts at 44.

Yep. And then it's all downhill after that. You're fucked too, because what happened with me was I started wearing glasses, and then you're just a little bit here and there, and then your eyes get used to them, and then your eyes get weak, and you need them all the time. When I was a kid, I couldn't wait to be. I wanted to be a fucking nerd.

Yeah. So I would go to the optometrist and I would, like, shake them down. Put some fucking glasses on me. You got 20-20 vision. Yeah, yeah. And I'd be pissed off like a motherfucker. I was like that with the broken arm. I always wanted the broken arm,

because the guy at the school with the cast, who'd be getting all the glory. You know what I mean? He'd come down and like, God, I never break shit. And I crash hard and not fucking not break shit. Oh, you know what I mean? Stupid. Oh, my God.

You're trying to break it? Well, I'm saying like, you know, like you crash on your motorcycle and you're like, fuck, nothing broke. Damn, you know, you want to get that sympathy, you know? You know, like, let me sound your cast, right? It's so fucking crazy. I took mercy to Jiu-Jitsu. And that song came on by Queen, Bohemian Rhapsody. Oh, God.

And I still remember being in the seventh grade. Like that, Mama Mia, Mama-Mea, Mama-Mea. Mama Mia let me go. I'll never forget being in the seventh grade and a brand new blimpie base opened up. On like 34th Street in Bergen-Line Avenue and you didn't

say like a brand new fucking, I could be wrong, it was in those 30s. And me and my friends were in there, in those days, you smoked out of a glass pipe. Yeah. It was a glass that looked like a flute. And it had a hole in it. The long one.

And you put the joint in the hole and it was called something. And you lit it. And then you took your hand away. A shotgun. A shotgun. And you get fucked up. Yeah. So it was like me and Carlos Perez.

Like four of us were fucking stoneed as fuck. A seventh grade, we get high on the walk up there. So by the time we got back to class, that one, we wouldn't be as high. We put Vizene in our eyes and the whole thing. Seventh grade? Seventh grade. We got so high.

And we walked into the blimpy base. We got that. You know, my shirt. shit at Blimpio, the original Blimpy. When Blimpy was Blimpy. Right. Well, it's not this shit now that they give you that fucking meat that somebody lost the leg on the 405.

Squirrel, mate. Yeah. Not that shit. This is when Blimpy was fucking, they used to be a Blimpie when I came from Cuba, the corner, 86th Street, and Broadway across the bank, right down that corner. And I'll never forget that's an truant officers. Oh, yeah. Remember those guys?

Remember those motherfuckers? They'd be out shaking. Looking for dudes. I'm hilarious. I play hookie, and I'm in a blimp-bee bass. Like in the fucking second grade, I'm in the blimpie base. Living like a doctor, I'm having like a foot-long roast beef with cheese, with fucking everything, vinegar oil, salt and pepper, heavy on the pepper.

You know me, Doug, which I fucking roasted. I was like, an animal. And he walked in and guessed what fucking Uncle Joey did in in the second grade. What? You offered to buy him lunch. Uh-huh. And he took me fucking home. It bribed him, yeah.

I bribed him, and he fucking walked me home. And this is when we lived on 205, West 88th Street. And he made me knocking the door. My mom was hung over. My mom had just got home. Yeah. Like a few hours before that. Working the bar?

I just, yeah, she was fucking closing the bar. I'm knocking. She ain't answering. And I had a key, and I held out. He's like, you have a key? I go, no. He goes, what am I going to do with you? I go, listen, man, she'll be home in a few hours.

Just leave me here. and he fucking left me there. Wow. And I watched him walk down the stairs and I just left myself in the house. That was it. I didn't get in trouble or nothing. Yeah.

But I never forget, I walking up to him going, what are you having for lunch? Let me buy you lunch. Already in the second grade, I was already a fucking sabbatte. Limbys. So would you guys skip school when you knew an album was coming out? I skipped school to go to tickets. Yeah.

Always. Yeah. Guaranteed. That was a no-fucking brain. Absolutely. As soon as they were announced, It was all over. Kish, how much money do you guys?

I got $18. You know, I don't have much money. Let me borrow it. It's an investment. We're getting tickets. We're going to see fucking Ted or. But there was two different ways. In those days, I never stood online.

Yeah. I never stood online. Yeah, you tell me you guys would just send it in. That's crazy. We would mail it in, but you also, Ticketron was at different locations. Yeah. So if you want to be a jerk off like everybody else

and go to Madison Square Garden just to be cool, I follow you. I get your, You're whatever. But if you go to St. Peter's Prep, there's no line. It's like that somebody has a bit about it. Yeah. There's somebody today, I think it was you, about going to get tickets in the old days

when you'd walk in and say, what's the best tickets you got? The guy would turn around and he had like a box behind. Yeah, yeah, man. And he'd go through a box and he'd go, okay, I got row six. I know. You know, level like level L. And you're like L, A, B, C, D, E, F, H, H, J, K, K, L, that's 12th row, dog.

Yeah. That's how you figure out. It was 12th row. So would you go to a different location then to see if they had better? They used to do these random things. They were typing the show and then the ticket would come and we'd go, hey, can you type it in again? And a different ticket would come up. And then I fucking got really hip.

Yeah. Like, this is what happened. Like, first I was like an amateur, but I enjoyed. I enjoyed going into the city. I enjoyed my buddies mailing in the mailers and getting four tickets. I enjoyed going to see all the country. concerts and then I heard a trick I heard that right before the show the night of they release yeah 50 tickets they do that and I started doing that showing up and getting front row

or whatever is it like their comments or something no it's called band it's a band holds like so the band has like 50 holds and then they got how many people you got there and they go we only got like 10 and then they released the others like band and they're always killer like it family section for the band. I went to see Don Henley on those tickets. Oh, man. With Cheryl Crow fucking in the singing firm and shit. I went to see a couple people with the most notable fucking time that happened.

I was hanging out with this kid named Danny Rendey. Danny Rendey's the kid. I sold the membership to the mafia too. He wasn't that sharp of a dude. Good dude. Good dude. The membership. Good dude. And he was, he had a girlfriend that he shipped.

ripped in from Brooklyn, and he would just tell her to sing. It was fucking classic. Like, we would be talking, and he'd go, shut the fuck up. I told you to sing, just sing. And she would sing a song, she was a horrible singer. Oh, my God. She was God awful.

Why you guys are talking? Yeah, she would sing, like, those disco songs from the 80s. Let's dance tonight. No, no, no, give me tonight. Those type of disco hits and shit. And he would tell us, shut the fuck up, sing, sing. And one day he came to me, man, Janet Jackson is playing.

It was 94, maybe Janet 94, 95, smoking Janet. Killer record. Off the if-fowl. Yeah, if, if. Great record. And I'm like, you only go see Janet? I'm going to see fucking Janet Jackson. And we went down and they had nothing.

And at like fucking 7 o'clock, he called me. He's like, hey, man, I went back. I went to them off my mom. And I went in there, the guy had like fucking six pro. Should I get them? And I go fucking get those tickets. Yeah. And we went to, we went to,

Fiddlers Green, or one of those, one of those places to see, couldn't have been Fiddlers. It could have been Fiddlers. Check and see if, what Janet Jackson's tour dates when 95, 94, if she did Fiddlers Green.

But when we get to Fiddlers Green, guess who's sitting fucking in front of me. Hell. It was either 94, 95, Fiddlers Green. Watch this. Janet Jackson,

If Tore. Oh, the if tour, not the Janet World Tour? I don't know. What's the World Tour? That's the Janet World Tour. What time of the year was it? So she played in Madison Square Garden in December. This is Colorado.

Colorado. Denver, the McNichael Sports Arena? What year? April of 94. You want to try 95? Yeah, try 95. Oh, wait, here we go. She's out touring right now.

Not doing too good. Not doing too, Bueno. She's having problems. I'd like to see her. The fucking, the kid, the ex-husband, he's a millionaire, the brothers involved. Yeah, right. She has a lot of shit. She's got some luggage, man, family luggage.

Oh, talk to fucking, that show. Yeah. Like, I read about this. I knew about this. They had allegations to her giving up a baby for adoption. Oh, yeah, remember that? From, yeah. From the Debarge.

Yeah. That's, like, real, I think. Now, yeah, now the barges are fucking looking for the kid. They found the kid. Wow. They found the kid. They found the kid somewhere in Santa Barbara. They lived in Encino.

Wow. So she had the kid in Santa Barbara, something like that. Yeah. So what are you defined? Anything? She was in Australia, Asia, and Europe for most of night, or at least for the beginning of 95. So it had to be 94 then. Yeah.

So I think it was McNichol's sports arena. And I'll tell you who was in front of me, fucking Andy Garcia. Wow, really. And then when I told a friend of mine, he goes, yeah, he's in town. They're shooting a movie. And the movie was things are doing Denver when you're dead. Oh, I love that film. And my buddy, Jimmy Abeda doubled him.

Oh, my God. You remember Jimmy Abeta? Yeah, yeah. Jimmy Abeta doubled him. That film's great. I had a couple of days as an extra. But it was hysterical. He was right in front of me.

Wow. And after the first warm-up band, I think it was Tony, Tony, Tony, Tony. Oh, yeah, they were good. They had that great record. And I said to him, I said something to him, and he goes, there's Cubans in Denver. I go, this Cuban's emboldened bitch. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And we talked.

He said something, and I said something. I didn't, you know, I didn't say nothing else. I was too embarrassed. And then when I came to the comedy store, one of the first guys to befriend me was a guy named Freddie Asparagus. Asparagus. Yeah, big dude. Yeah, big dude. How do you mean all these people with nicknames?

I've never once met anyone with a nickname. Bro, take a look at Freddy Asparagus. Take a look at this picture. God rest of it. Freddy Asparagus. Freddie Espairus was a regular at the store. Just his face. Let you know that he was the sweetheart.

He was an angel from gun. He was a comic? Yeah, he was a comic at the store. He was in... Oh, okay. Yes, fuck yeah, you know what it is. Let's see. Eight million ways to die.

Anything Andy Garcia did early on, Andy would put him in. Oh, yeah, I know that guy. Absolutely. Yeah, dog. Come on. On the left, what's that move on the left? Top left.

He did. Top left there. This one? Top left. That's the left. What movie is that? That's Three Amigos. Keep clicking.

Keep clicking. Let's see what he was there. Look at him with Mitzie Shaw. Wow, look at that. Yeah. Look at that photo. That's killer. Oh, with Sam and everybody.

Yeah, dog. Look at Freddy. Look at him. His face, he had a fucking face. That's Carlisbo. That's Freddie Asparagus. Argus. That's Fargo.

Yeah, Argus. Oh, my God. That's cocaine Argus. Yeah, Cocaine Argus. That's cocaine Argus. Stash Kinnison right there with the stash and Jim Carrey. Oh my look at Freddie Asparagus how big and fatty was dog but now he was he had lost weight. Hey, that's the store parking lot without the Ivy. Look at that without the Ivy.

Yes, really right. Crazy. Jim Carrey. And look at that Dotson B-210 right there in the background. One of the comics was driving that. Well, he was one of the guys at the store that befriended me right away. Like as soon as I got through the store, I'm like, oh my God, fucking Freddy Asparagus. And he would talk to me and he kept saying to me, and did Andy fucking meet you yet? Yeah.

And I told him the whole Andy thing. I go, bro, I met Andy at a concert, Johnny Jackson concert when he was shooting things and doing death because I was there. I just didn't go, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Wow. And we started talking. And next thing you know, fucking he died.

There's a nut. There's some more look at vintage store photos. He was the real deal. He's the real deal, Freddie. Look at him. Yeah. Look at him with Angel Salas are. Yeah.

What? Angel Salazar. Happy birthday comedy store. 10th anniversary. Look at that. The guy that, you see the guy all the way at the right behind Argus? Yeah. And Argus's shoulder. Yeah. He was the executive producer of Arliss who got me on Arlis.

Oh, really? Yeah, he got me on Arlis. He was one of the look at Angel Salazar when he was dating her. Which one? Right there, right next to her. To the right, to the right, to the right. Right there. It looks like a woman.

He was the one that was in your office. in the office with us. Norton Coke. Oh, my God. That's Angel fucking Sala-Alee. Scarface. That's when the store was the fucking store. All of them was smiling.

Because look at Argus. He had a fucking half a kilo of Coke on his pocket. Oh, my God. Look at all these pictures. They're fucking... Yeah, those are great. Look at that one there. It's like orange colored there.

Yeah, that right there. Look at that one. Let's look at that. Wow. Jimmy Walker. Look at those. Oh, look at Dave Letterman. Look at that.

Oh, man. That shit is crazy. Look at the guy from the improv. Yep. Bud Friedman. Bud Friedman, the chick. Yeah, look at that. That's crazy.

Wow, that's some good shit, man. That's some comedy gold right there. That is some crazy. I can look at that shit for hours. Oh, me too, me too. Right? Well, I first got to the store, especially La Jolla. Yeah.

La Jolla has so many pictures that you look at it. Oh, my God. Even the guys we know, like, now, like how much they've changed, like, Ari's photo and and when you look at like the different eras of different guys, you know, like, wow, is that, who is that? You know, you're looking at it. I'm like, that's Steve Renazizi, you know, different guys. They totally look different. It's, uh, when you look at those pictures, you go, fuck, I'm a part of that in a way, you know?

Yeah. I remember looking at those pictures as an outsider. Yeah. Going like, I'll never be that cool to be at a party. Missy Shaw, like that's fucking crazy. So cool, man, right? Fucking. Sometimes, yeah, Freddy Asparagus.

You know what? He was one of those guys that I got to meet him, talked to him for like a month and a half, and then one day they came in, they go he died. Wow, what did he die from? Like a heart attack. He was a big guy. Oh, wow.

And they did a memorial at the store, and Andy came, and I went, and they played music at the end and shit. It was really fucking dynamite. That was one of my first. kind of like storm memorial and a real old time is right a lot of old time yeah that was one the last time let him yeah went to the store I didn't see him right I didn't see him but somebody said he came for fredi asparagus wow yeah like that those guys were tight those

guys were part of it because Andy Garcia I didn't know nothing about Andy being a comedy store regular did you no you didn't know that either no I never knew that come on dog I swear to God, he was. He was a host on Monday night. Oh, I never knew that at all. He answered the phones. Wow. So years ago, I forgot who the talent direct coordinator was.

Got a call from somebody going, look through the archives and see if you could find Andy Garcia's headshots. Wow. Like Doug Truzzle gets a call or something? Yeah, and they found it. Wow. And they put it on the show. I guess he answered the phones at the comedy store. Wow.

And he did the Monday night improv group. in the main room with Dave Letterman. That's how come Dave and him are friends. Wow. On Monday nights, they were all part of that. Monday nights was the biggest night at the store. Yeah. Can you fucking believe that?

I remember that. I remember that? Well, when I was going there in 88, 87, Monday, Mondays was crazy. The whole town would end up there. Did you fucking believe that? They would go there on Monday nights. My boy sold Blow, so he'd go, we'll hit there.

He would do a lap around the store. He was dating the head waitress. We'd drink free, and it was just like rock. year where you going to the store? Like 87, 80. Holy shit. Yeah, man. Seeing, you know, all those guys down there, man.

It was wild. Just drunk. I'd be drunk and doing blow, you know, hanging out. And because, you know, you would go to, like, the whiskey and see a band, and then everybody would end up at the store, you know, because Monday nights at the whiskey, I think, was this thing, no bozo jam. And everybody could play. He just signed up and jammed.

And then everybody would go to the store after, hang out on the patio. It was like, wow, my buddy Alteam, and I had him on the podcast because it was foggy for me. He goes, yeah, man, yeah. He would go through it and tell me, I was dating the waitress. Your buddy was dealing to blow. I was like, wow. It was so crazy. You posted a great picture yourself with Fonko the other day.

Axel? Yeah, and you said something about Laurel Canyon. Yeah, that was at the Laurel Canyon Mansion right there. The one that Rick Rubin bought were chili peppers did their blood sugar sex magic. So I was in there. And that's where I kind of OD'd on Blow. I was just telling Burr the story. It was like 80s.

And the guy actually went for a pyramid of blow. He was trying to make like a pyramid of like Scarface style. Like yeah. And I went over there thinking it was the blow was going to go away. So I took a giant massive. probably a gram line, not even knowing. And my left arm just froze up. And I was like, oh, fuck, my arm.

I don't feel it. And I went over to the guy and I go, dude, you got to call an ambulance. He's all, fuck that, dog. We can't get any heat up here, man. We got fucking a lot of blow. And that's Axel Rose over there playing piano, you know? He's like, he just handed me a ball. He goes, either you split or drink it down.

And I was like, oh, man, all right. And I went over the corner. I was just drinking the stole. He's trying to come down, rubbing my arm. Like, that's going to help. I was rubbing my arm like the doctor, you know, like, this will help. And it finally went away. After like an hour, I was like, whoa.

You know, that had to be like some kind of small stroke or something. You know what I mean? And if you look at our eyes in that photo, I'm just pegged, just bam. My eyes are just cooking. Now, Axel is what you is this? He had 88, right there. So he was already Axel. Oh, yeah, he's Axel.

And matter of fact, I tell this story, and the guy backed it up on my podcast because people would be like, oh, I don't know about that, but got the photos to prove it. He goes, do you want to hear a new song I'm working on? They had a piano there. He played November rain. I never forgot it. We were just there. It was like eight of us. Did you see that just broke a billion?

I can't believe it. Did you see that? A billion views. And it's so weird. that I had bird on here, maybe three years ago, and we were going to talk about something, and we went into a G&R fantasy world. Right.

The impact of Guns and Roses, summer of 88, how it just steamrolled. Insane. It was, you know, it was in the vein of Elton John in New York City in 73, in the vein of, you know, Michael Jackson. Yeah. In 84, New York, and in the vein of Springstance. Oh yeah, point in the USA.

Fucking Jersey nine nights in that vein of Madonna in 85. Yeah, like a virgin. 88 fucking was just G&R's fucking destruction. And it started slow. It was like a bam, bam, bam, bam. But I will still never forget their videos. Yeah. And I remember that Bert and I went into like November rain and the other one.

Yeah. And do you know for six weeks kids were emailing me going, I never knew those fucking videos even existed. Oh, yeah, the trilogy. Like, thank you for even talking about usual illusion one. Love it. And two, like how they destroyed 1990. I think they came out on October 90 or something.

Two records in one day. Tower records. You fucking believe that. It was unbelievable. Yeah, game changer. Game changer. You know? It was so weird to think about how five dudes were the biggest guys on the planet from just Hollywood.

You know what I mean? Just fucking huge. Now, did you know any of them before the explosion? I knew the guys, well, my band was playing and they play San Francisco, and then I would see them in L.A. My buddy was, my buddy actually played keyboards for him a little bit. And he actually played drums one time when Adler broke. his arm, this guy, Howard Teaman, who's got a tattoo shop right on Ventura right now. And the Teaman brothers, there were three of them, they lived in that mansion and G&R would rehearse there

sometimes, you know, like go up and jam and stuff. And they would have crazy parties at this place, dude. Crazy. Two, three, four-day runs, you know, it was just wild. And Howard had an Impala convertible, painted like a cheetah. So you'd see them all over holiday. Oh, there's Howard, You know, these guys ruled the city, man. Now, what's the connection with, like, Slash and Laurel Canyon? They all lived on Little Canyon or something like that? No, I don't know where they... They lived over there by a guitar center, the Hellhouse.

Right, behind Gardner. Right, right, behind Gardner, behind those garages back there. Yeah, exactly. Behind that, not toy, if you go to Toy, you went too far. Right. It's behind the Sunset Grill. Right, exactly. It's behind the Sunset Grill, the Sunset Grill, the Sunset Grill, the

song that the eagle sang, the Sunset Grill, behind there. Hellhouse was a trip. Yeah. Yeah. That's so fucking crazy. Yeah. And I guess across the street, somebody else lived on that whole area. That whole area was rock and roll.

It was rock and roll. Totally. Somebody else lived there across the street. It was all heroin, too. It was crazy because you'd get heroin at American Burger. That's where the guys would hang out. Oh, my God. American Burger.

It's a Chipotle now. And when they did American Pimp. Yeah. They showed them like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, well, let's go back. Yeah. American burger is Chipotle now. Yeah. Holy shit.

That's what it is, dear? Now, what's the other one where, if you stayed on sunset on that side? Yeah. And you went down towards like by Rouse. Yeah. There was a hamburger place. Yes. Yes, there was a hamburger joint that was there forever.

The burgers were horrible, but it was a hookah hanger. I just remember Sunset Grill. And if you, down from the Sunset Grill, if you watch American Pimp by the Hughes Brothers. Yeah, love that movie. They interview, Slim, whatever. Yeah, yeah. And he's in front of the place.

Oh. And he's not going to, I remember one time coming down here. Then you had rock and roll Denny's. Rock and Roll Denny's. Rock and Roll Denny's was a fucking hard show. That was the spot, man. That was a crazy spot. That one in.

Uncle Joey has some bad stories about that fucking spot, dog. That fucking five block radius was so dark. It was just dope and rock and roll and fucking lunatics. Not to beat it up. God rest is all. Ralphie told us the story about when the pimp knocked on his door. Wow. Asked him, you want a piece of that ass.

Right on. Is that in that neighborhood? Yeah, because that neighborhood, what nobody remembers was the first guy to invade that whole neighborhood, county-wise, was a man by the name of Doug Stando. Oh, wow. Who still has an apartment there, and it's rank control. He still has it?

He will not give it up. Whoa. That's a little secret then. A lot of people don't know. He still has it. Since 1996, he's had that apartment. Oh, shit. In that area?

It's rank control. So he's on Curseon. Oh, yeah. He's been on Curseon forever because he could walk to coaching horses. Yeah, coaching horses, man. So he stayed there. His rent was $400 in 1998. Man, it's probably $7.50 now.

7, 50, 6, 8, 20. Yeah, yeah, right. Down the corner from the fucking 7-11, so he never let it go. He's kept it all these years. He's got houses all over the world. He's kept that apartment just in fucking case. That's rad. And then he had his mother next to him.

Oh, and the other one? When his mother came out, he happened to get, the German girls. There was German girls. One had big tits, and the other one had curly hair. And one night she smacked Joe Rogan in the face. Whoa. At a fucking restaurant because she,

misunderstood. They got an argument. Something crazy. She went to smack Joe Rogan at coaching horses. But the German sister, the roommate, was a co-core photographer. Fucking crazy. She was crazy. And Doug Stanhope would drive her crazy. And then the mother lived next to Doug. When they moved out, Doug put his mother in there. That's rad.

And when Ralphie... Ralphie moved into that building, too? lived with Doug for a while. Wow. So one day Doug called me, he goes, have you seen Ralphie? He goes, you're not going to believe what happened. He goes, I caught him in bed with my mother.

And he got dressed and ran out, and I haven't seen him since. So I went over there, and I get there, and they're all laughing at me. They play the fucking prank comedy. Ralphie used to live in that Doug Stanhope Estate. That's why we called his mother, God bless her soul. Her name is Bonnie. Yeah. But if her name was Bonnie Earmups,

because you had to put earmuffs on because she had to put earmuffs on, because she was the earbeat and she would give you. You could not get Bonnie started. Bonnie was like my daughter. You get mercy. You don't even have to give mercy a bump of Coke. Yeah. She will talk your ear off straight and quote herself and argue and catch herself and go,

no, no, no, no, no, no, no. The whole thing for 45 minutes. I love it. She makes mercy look like them. So we used to call Bonnie Earmuffs to her face. Bonnie Earmuffs. And she had nine cats. All of them were missing something.

Nine cats. So she would go and take the cats. Doug Stanhope's mother would go save the cats on Execution Day. Oh, my God. And she would save cats that were missing something because she didn't want them to get a bring him back to the hut. So she'd have one cat without an arm, one cat without an ear, one cat without a tail, one cat. So we would go with us from 97 to 98.

So long ago. I stayed at Stanhope's for maybe three, four months. He bought bunk beds. Oh, whoa. That's how cool he was. He bought bunk beds He's the coolest And put him in his living room

And he just said People are gonna live here Wow I saw him last week at the store How was he brilliant Yeah and he's so nice man He comes up Dean What's up man

Bingo When you were sleeping You know Dean was on the end of the world Podcast man She's all oh hey You know just like so nice and cool I love that guy And then he just murders

He just murders I heard he had a great set Oh come on His special from a few years back In Portland, in the 50 seat room, I told him to his face, I said, one of the greatest specials I've ever seen, man. It came out like two, three years ago.

He doesn't give a fuck. He doesn't give a fuck. He doesn't give a fuck. He's a fucking... He's a special type of animal. I just watched him on Rogan today. Oh, yeah. I watch him on Rogan while I was right.

I fucking love that guy. I've always loved him. He had a two-bedroom and a car. Wow. That you could borrow. But there was a problem with him. the car, you got to go right to the gas station because the gas gauge was broken. Oh, yeah, you don't want to get stuck. So as soon as you got in the car, you got to go right

to the gas station for $20 in. How many times I ran out of gas with that fucking car pushing the limit? I got to have an audition, and I didn't have a car when I first moved out of it. I go to stand home. I go, Doug, I'm going to bind. Borrow the fucking car. Man. Just make sure you put 20 in it before you even make that right turn. I don't know in the last. He jumped for you and everything. He's a special soul, man, because, you know, I I love people that can just be like that where they can just be like, hey man, whatever's mine is yours and whatever happens happens,

you know, like there's no rigid nothing. It's just, yeah, man, yeah, you know, like when bands roll through and Bisbee, they stay at his place and stuff,

you know, it's like, that's a, that's a, that's a, that's a gift that most people don't have. Don't have. I don't have that gift.

Yeah. I'm, I don't have that gift. I don't either because I'm like, an only child so I'm like yeah I'm an only job I need to fucking be alone yeah I don't need what is a guy snoring in my living with you oh driving me fucking crazy if I come out there and I don't see fucking coasters yeah I will have a fucking heart attack yeah like a half a beer bottle with a cigarette in it in my living room oh oh I will have a fucking heart attack yeah yeah so before

uncle Joey has that heart attack yeah I don't like movement yeah I know I like oh I'm I'm a fucking maniac. I don't like no movement. What are you moving so? Yeah. Sit the fuck still. You get weird, right? Yeah.

Guy comes stays a week, doesn't get any, bring toilet paper or anything. Come on, dude. You don't bring nothing? You don't bring nothing to the plate? And here's the funny thing. I know how to be hospitable with people. Like if you come to me and you, when I'm coming out to L.A., I need to stay three days of you.

I'm very hospitable. I'm just not. Yeah. I had Rollins on. You know what he said? He goes, I love you, man. You call me, you tell me your car is broken or whatever. I'll come get you and help you.

But if you call and say, can I stay at your pad? Here's $400. Get the best hotel. I just don't want people at my pad. You know what I mean? It's like, I think he's the only child too. You know, it's just something weird about it. It fuck you up.

It does fuck you up. I'm very hospitable. Yeah. You come over, whatever. I'm not going to take it universal. Yeah. I'm not going to show you no travel sites. Like my brother's in San Diego.

I love him daily. He landed today. This is what? You've known me seven years, and this is his... Fourth or fifth time? This is probably... How many times is Comic-Con? What Comic-Con is this?

Every year, San Diego. What number is this? I don't know. He's been coming to his day one. Right. I mean, this guy... I didn't even know you had a brother. He...

George. My, I never met. Since 1978. We met in the summer school. and if he didn't fucking, if I didn't bump into him in 1985, I bumped into him. I was casing houses up in Bergen County.

He was a lawn mower dude. Yeah. He was whatever, raking a lawn. Yeah. Landscaper. Landscaper. I bumped into him February of 85 after not seen him for like four years.

We lost communication. Whoa. Pumped into him. It's like bumping into somebody in fucking Redondo Beach. You and me like, are you serious? Yeah. And then I called him that night.

I got arrested that afternoon. I bumped into him. Yeah. I got arrested three hours later. I had his number in my pocket. I called him up and I go, come get me and bailed me on. He bailed me up, but he goes, you don't have to stay in the hotel.

Let's go get your stuff. I talked to my mom. You can stay with us. Yeah. And he's been my brother since February of 85. That's just the way life is. Josh Wolf is another kind of stand-hop guy. Like, you know how he let you stay at his pad?

He's like that. Like, hey, whatever you need, just come over, take it, you know? Yeah, yeah, there's some people that are very generous. I'll let you stay in my pad. Yeah. I'm just not going to go to Universal with you. Yeah. I don't know what my schedule is.

I do my shit. That's the problem with me. I do my shit. Yeah. You know, there's hours where I don't even like to talk. It's funny because, like, Lee has a friend, and she's very sweet, and she always says, if you ever go to the coffee shop, call me, it's the last thing I want.

Yeah. Yeah. It's the last thing I want. I don't want to drink a cold. When I go to a coffee shop, It's to work. Yep. It's to get out of my house,

to get vitamin D, to breathe, to hear, to hear nature, to hear birds and cars and people, you know, running through red lights and horns. And then I get my thinking going.

I get, uh, what's that word? You get, not, you get like when you get, like my daughter, if she sees too many red lights, what happens to it?

She gets too, she sees too. Over stimulants. Oh, yeah. I need that also. We all need that. that you know what I'm saying that's why I fucking go to a coffee shop I don't go to a coffee show you come over and talk to me about life that would ruin my fucking coffee shop yeah you're

you're right coffee I drink coffee I drink green tea yeah I don't even drink coffee when I go I drink green tea all the fucking time it's like like a coffee shop I go to I sit in the corn and plug my phone and I take my computer on I take a notebook out and it's two hours I got two hour time yeah so that two hours I drink a little bit and I got two hour time and that's that two hours I get up because it's not you're back starts to hurt yeah you gotta get up and move around you got shit yeah there's got to be something so you schedule an hour work or work out then you go back afterward for two hours and it's a lot easier than sitting there for four hours nothing's gonna get accomplished no you just gonna get the taste of ink in

your fucking mouth you know and also then you just start fucking just looking at your phone or whatever you're like yeah once you're you know it's it's it's it's I've said on this show a thousand times how thought is your enemy and your best friend thought could be your best friend or your enemy. You have to cut a line that thought at some point because you might overthink a situation and then come up with fucking dick. Or when you don't get...

That's why I tell people I don't like close bases. Like if I had to come here at 8 in the morning and I'd sit here without the door open, I would lose my mind by 9.30. I'd be in a bad mood. Yeah. I would think about things to set me off in a bad mood. I'd think about that time

in the 8th grade, Kiki cheated on me. Yeah. with Steve and the football player. Like, why would you think about that now? Just that's what no stimulation in the daytime. That's why I tell comics to always have a job. Yeah, man. Because if you're hanging out with other comics,

they're just telling you bad news in the daytime. Yeah. If you live with two or three other comics, what are they telling you? They're telling you about what's not happening. Yeah. Man, I'm not past. I didn't get booked.

I didn't get an audition. It's horrible. Yeah. And all of a sudden, you get six or six. seven of those morons together. The Black Pit. And it's the suicide crew. And it's until, let's see who snaps first.

I've seen it a thousand times. Comics think that you, that's why I tell people you have to have a daytime schedule. Yeah, man. Just because you don't have a job. Don't mean you don't have a fucking job. No way you can sleep all day. You got a job and a half. There's your health, there's writing, there's bills, there's

contacting people. There's always something you could be doing. Yeah, man. Like, there's always something you could be doing. A lot of people don't know how to do that. Yeah, I get up, immediately start doing shit. The gym, edit a podcast, go get a coffee, write, listen to the set, then go back, try to book some people for the podcast, then, you know, sell something on Craigslist, whatever I'm doing all day long, just generating movement. Now, what the fuck is it that you sell on Craigslist? Can you please tell me?

I just sold a bicycle on there. I had a bicycle. So you buy and sell shit? Buy and then flip it, yeah. No shit. Yeah, man. You know, like lately I've been on the road and I try to hit some, I look for some vintage audio equipment, you know, like stereo stuff.

That shit's going for big money, man, you know? Like that Morantz I got. I bought two of them. Sold one of them so mine's free. You know, made like double the money. Just whatever I can flip. It's so funny when I went to the house that day and I was looking at the quality. Yeah.

Of that piece of that... That Morant. Morant. I was looking at the quality, and I knew that if I walked over to it, and I tried to pick it up. I would go, holy fuck. Oh, thing.

It's so heavy. You pick up a DVD. It's like a pound. Yeah, yeah, a DVD player. When we moved, like, I picked it up. It was nothing. I'm like, when I was a kid, you picked up a fucking...

A receiver? Oh, my God. It was dirty fucking pounds. Like, it was pure fucking metal. If you put the earplugs all the whole way in, you could hear Martian talk. fucking shit. Yeah, just,

don't gunk, you know. When I sold the one, the other one to the guy, he came and picked it up, he's a, Don Henley's keyboard player.

It just happened to come over off of Craigslist. Like, what do you do? He's like, ah, keyboards, you know, and then we start talking. I go,

I got a podcast. He goes, oh, I listen to it. I know who you are. And then he goes, oh, yeah, I play behind a curtain for the Eagles,

you know, little keyboards here. And then I go out with Don Don Henley. I was like, wow, he went over to grab that thing. And he just was like, oh, I saw his fucking back. Like, oh, this thing's no joke, man.

Probably 85 pounds. But it doesn't, you're thinking about this new shit now that weighs like an ounce. Nothing. So he went over to grab it one hand and just took himself out. Yeah, you're like, what the fuck? Disocate your shoulder. So, like, do you remember when that was big and then someone who's running a store now just has it at the wrong price? Is that what you do?

No. As vinyl is starting to get hot, you know, again. And, of course, in the last few years, you know, turntables and the equipment's getting hot. So you just find some old good stuff from the 70s that works, you know, still, that shit worked forever. It should bulletproof, man, that old shit. And then, you know, it just goes up and up in price. Just find it. Like when you're in middle America and you're at like a goodwill, you're like, look at that.

That's a fucking Morantz. Nobody knows. Nobody knows. Nobody knows, Lee. No, no. What's the cost on this? I don't know. Give me $25.

Yeah. $25. And you start looking around on the thing. You go, your thing work? Yeah, I had it on the all day. And you're like, holy fuck. Yeah, walkmans are hot right now again, because people love cassettes. These hipsters.

Are they really? Oh, yeah. Hipsters are going cassettes right now. No, they're not. Absolutely. Those are back now. No, I saw that the DVD is done. Done.

Yeah. Done. DVD and the CD are done. I think I grew up with a cassette And I didn't even really Maybe that's why I played a part into why I never really Fell In love with music Because I used to hate it

You have to fast forward You don't know what you're fast forwarding to me I know you're trying to find the track I hate that It's like You get to it All right there And the tape gets all stretched

Then it eats it You're like fuck my thing's gone To eat your cassette You ever had that You're fucking pulling it out Oh There was a certain player That kept taking cassettes out

People get pissed It was like something You taped over And when you get pissed. You ever throw your cassette in the buddy's ride? Like, yeah, I brought the tunes. And then his ride eats your tape. You're like, dude, you're fucking, you owe me.

You're right. In the 80s, in the 80s, there was a cassette deck. Yeah. Blop punk. I love that. Blah punk. Came in all the beemers. Remember that?

Blop punk, if you fast forward it, it ate your tape. Oh. That's what it was. If you press fast forward or reversed. Oh. You're like, fuck! And then you tried to save the tape. It was ten bucks.

So you had to push it, and then the tape would come out, and the more you pulled, the tape would come out, you would lose your mind. And then you had guerrillas who would take their hands like me and just break the tape, and then they would fuck the whole thing up, but I knew how to actually take it apart, take a screwdriver. I would reel it back in, and then wherever it would get wrinkled,

I would just rub it nice and pray. and back and forth like three hours, like a half of homo that I am. It was all sticky mountains. Oh, my God. It was fucking crazy what you do to save your cassettes, what you did. And get to that part and be like, welcome to the B'l-Blo-Blo-Juggle.

I cannot believe the cassette is coming back. Let me give some shot. John Petrovsky, I love you. Kitty Foreman, you sexy savage. Nate Mooney, Uri Andrews, Andres, Nolan Patanaudi, Robert Glee. Dick Bird, Mikey Serino, 4, and Dos Tress. I love you.

That's it. Who the fuck you think you're dealing with? Those Tres, I love that fucking name. And always Lalingis, always Bobby and Sharon. Always the Australian fucking warrior. The originals. The church fucking originals. Kichi on the couch throwing fucking eat.

I can't even look at it. You know what I'm saying? All right. So give me your top 10, live albums. if your fucking best friend came to you and said, I want you to recommend your top 10 albums and why. All right. Okay.

My first one, number 10, is a record that I talk about a lot, Santana Live at the Fillmore. I love this one, man. It's like, I think I got it. It is incredible. Incredible. Incredible. What year is that one?

I think it's like 69 or, 70 or something? Yeah, yeah, I got that up here. Oh, my God, that record. That's good one. I can't even believe I agree this. All right. Then this is another one.

And last night I did the goddamn comedy jam saying, me and Marin, we did long way to the top if you want to rock and roll. And backstage, it reminded me. Bob Marley played there and did a live record. Bob Marley live at the Rocksie. That's funny because I was talking to somebody and they said one of the Marley albums. That's the one, live at the Rocks scene. It's the rock. That's the one. It is incredible, man. The band is at the top of the game. It is like

the ultimate live reggae record. It's insane. Then Frampton comes live, of course. Everybody in their mom had that, yeah, you know. Nugent, double live gonzo. And I just had Rollins on my podcast Monday. And he and I talked about seeing Nugent in that era. There's nothing like it. Nothing like it. Nothing like it. There was a story going around. Somebody pulled the gun out and he pulled the bow and error off. Somewhere at some fucking Cobo Hall or something. Ted was nuts.

That guy. When he come out with a loin fucking thing. Oh, yeah. Listen, man, he followed Arrow Smith. Yeah. No problem. No problem. No problem.

He raced. Erasmith. Erased him. You know, when I was watching Doug Stanhope and Rogan, somebody said, well, he's just a guy that had two shitty songs in the 70s. No. I think you're mistaken there. You know, I do not like Ted.

after what's his name left? No, after St. Holmes. Which he's on the road. He's on the road this year. Yeah, yeah. He's doing something on the road, Derek St. Holmes. If you like that album. Oh, yeah.

I mean, it's 70% Derek St. Holmes. Yeah, absolutely. He's the singer. He's the singer. I didn't even know he was the singer until I went. Now, is the stranglehold that we hear? Yeah. The same stranglehold on Double Live Gons?

No. The stranglehold, you mean that they play now? Yeah. Yeah, it's the same. Yeah. That's from that album? That's from that album. Absolutely.

Yes, it's strangled, uh, fucking stormtroopers. Stormtroopers. Storm a trooper come and get ready. Dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, yeah. No, it's a brilliant, I'm telling you. That's why I opened up with it. When I heard Wang Dang sweet Poon Tang, I fucking forgot. And I'm like, Nashville 76.

And the way he said the word pussy. Yeah. He fucking meant it. Then I remembered that at the end, didn't he blow it at the end with a 16-year-old? Oh, I don't know about that. Yeah. At the end, he left with somebody. There was allegations of something.

Then she became 18 and it went away. Wow. His sister, his wife's sister. His wife's sister. Something. Wow. Okay. Then this one was big, big to me.

Cheap trick, Buda-Con. Yeah, that's on everybody's list. That was a, that was a record. Okay. then Ramones, it's alive. Never got into that one. That one is, yeah, that one is just a classic live energy punk rock record. Just like, holy shit.

Kiss Alive too, of course. Zeppelin's song remains the same. That got turned on to that. And you don't want to put it on the list. Like, it's too easy. Yeah. I felt bad. That's why I told you.

I'm not even going to put on the list. There was albums that were too easy. Yep. You know, there's so fucking many great, you know, we were comparing it to comedy. Like, how hard it is to get the perfect shot. And let me tell you something, don't get confused. A lot of those shows are different shows from different nights. Of course.

Edited it together. Edited it together. So that's not get confused. But there are some performances out there. Straight through. Straight through. Yeah. Fucking.

How the West was on Zeppelin at the L.A. Form. Smoking. Open with immigrant songs. Smoking. What a punch in the face. Okay. Almond Brothers live at the film.

Okay. There's just no... Again, it's too easy. That's too easy. Yep, it's too easy. I listen to that too. But that whip and post... And there was something else in there.

The first song they opened. How they open. How they open. See, when I talk about imposing your will, like this is what I didn't like when I did my Netflix special, I didn't impose my will. I let the will get imposed on me. Right.

That's the best way I can explain it. When you listen to the Ormond Brothers live at the Filmwalk, as a matter of fact, we find it just for one second. It's stupid guy. Live at the Filmwall. Watch how they open up. Yeah. Okay, do you think that they give you what Kitchie wanted?

You think the Allman Brothers like... Fillmore East? Yeah. Yeah. On the drive, we're all sitting in the car going, they're going to open up with this. Yeah, yeah. And they're going to open up with that.

I'll bet you fuck in the joint. Nice people with a bitch on a sound out of Macon, Georgia. Let's welcome please the Ormond Brothers. Out of Macon. Sounds like Theo Ron, number one. That's Bill Graham. Listen to this. Yeah.

Listen to this music. Who opens up with this? The Armand Brothers do. It's their terms. Look at this shit. Look at Dickie Betts. What? Dwayne.

Who opens up like this? This is their terms. You're fucking kidding me. Dirty white from the heart. No fucking per-no fakeness at all. Look at this. Zero. And then zero fuck's giving.

Yeah. Murdering. Oh, here we go. Blaine. No, no, he won't sing. He won't sing at all. Dickie and this other guy rock this shit. Barry Oakley.

Unbuckin' believable. Just fucking tremendous. Zero fucks. Yep. You think they give a fuck about Twitter or Facebook right? They don't know they don't. They didn't give a fuck about Snapchat. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. What a great fucking album.

Oh my God. Again, when I put this album on, it's like I'm boring you to death. Yeah. But I tried to, I tried not to put... Look at the guy that did the movie with Pride. Yeah. A bunch of movie with Pride. What was his name? Gene Wilder.

Yeah, Gene Walder on drums. That guy killed himself a couple years ago. 1970. That's 40 fucking eight years ago. I walk by that venue almost every day in New York.

Every time I go to New York, I look at that venue and do the sign of the cross. I walk right by it. Every time I see that venue to the sign of the cross because it's the holy as St. Patrick's Cathedral,

baby. Oh, it's... God has been there. The devil has been in there. East Village. Everybody's been. in there. It's fucking crazy. What else is on your list?

Okay. Just very quickly, why do you guys, like, why is it too easy for you? If you like it that much, why can't it be on your list? It's an obvious one because most people love it, but it has the magnitude of it is so insane to me that I have to, I have

to fucking say it. There's just no way around it. Okay, so when I go with Fillmore East. Yeah. Well, I, I have that number seven for me. Yeah, yeah. One for the road. Letters, it. Too easy, okay? Frampton comes alive. Too easy. Yep. Soar remains the same. Too easy.

Right. Then I come up with Falsome Prison. Okay. I love the first three fucking jams, how he broke it down. I got Kiss Alive on there. Awesome. My number four is live at Boudicant, and I don't like Cheap Trick. Oh, yeah. That's the record. Okay. I don't even like Cheap Trick. You ever hear me fucking talk about fucking cheap trick? No, no, no. And I'm telling you, live at Boudiccan. Number three is Unleased in the East, which we're going to talk about something else also. My number two, which I think, and I'm not a big, a fucking Deep Purple fan, but Made in Japan is a bad motherfucker. And I'm going to tell you an album that I've loved under the Blood Red Sky. You two had Red Rocks. Sick.

There you go, motherfuckers. Rainbow on stage. Yes songs, you know, to capture what Yes was doing live. Yes was doing something they had too many moving pieces it was like Chicago yeah oh yeah Chicago's a great man too many moving pieces yeah but what's that one but da pa pa da bum bum bum bum bum bum oh shit no no no say you want what's a Chicago just had some fuck fucking masterpieces I hated Chicago growing up and then my buddy turned me on to Chicago three I was like what the fuck

is this? No, it's like a fucking... What? Do no, no, no, no, no. Yeah. Dun-na-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. They had, like, 20 of those jam. And then they came back in 83.

Yeah, man. With now, 84 with Peter Satera. What's the jam that he sang? It was smoking. They came back 10 years later and broke the bank. You found someone else. Oh, yeah. You didn't have no reason.

Yeah. No one can blame you for running to him. All that shit. Two people together. That's the shit. That's the shit. Yeah. Oh, my God.

All right. So that, you know, I got Metallica, S&M. Yeah, man. All right. Like I said, I got yes song. What really killed me about my list that I had it, like I said, I never did this much homework in a long time. Was that five out of my 10 hours.

were shot in fucking Maine, Japan, unleashed in the East, live at Buda Khan. Where's Kiss Alive shot? Kiss Alive, I think it's the States. I know that's Kobo Hall. Okay. Yeah. So four of those albums. Yeah.

Japan. There was three or four of those albums that were shot overseas. Because I'll tell you, you know, and we didn't even talk about UFO. Again, too easy. We've already beat that up. I beat that up already. We beat that. I can't even start to tell you how good if you want blood.

I can't even tell you. You got it. It's the best. If you want blood, you got it was the one that got me back into all these live things. Yeah. And now I feel bad. Now I feel shitty because when I gave those albums away in 84, I had over three or four albums in there,

but I probably had over 100 of those live recordings I would buy from the garden. Oh, yeah. And I got to be honest with you. Let's be honest, the truth. out of the 140 of them were God off. Yeah, it was like this like God off. You know,

you know, sometimes you had bad tapings. Yeah. Audience recordings. Audience recordings. Under the stage. Some nights you had that really? Yeah, that's what I heard. Like what they do is they pay some,

the guy, the security guys, and they'd come in early and they just put some mics under the stage, you know, and then split and then come back and get the recording later. So they're under the stage. or they'd sneak them in under seats, tap it under a seat.

You're sitting under a tape recorder, you don't even know. That's why you get the one guy, yeah. Yeah, you get beat all the fucking time on those. But every once in a while, you know where the masters are taping those? Deadheads. No, they're the best.

Deadheads are the geniuses. I used to get some deadhead shit in Boulder. Yeah, you can't even believe it. You can't even believe it. As a matter of fact, the band puts them out now. You know, like they put them out, like dicks, picks and all these. Like, you know, they get a good one.

They go, we're putting this out. Oh, do you know what I just heard? What? I fucking heard that the singer from Back Company. Yeah. Jeff Beck. Yeah. And Nancy Wilson are on tour.

Yeah, they're on tour. They're playing the Greek. But listen to this. Yeah. What night? I don't know, but I know they're playing there. What night at the Greek? Let's go down there.

Yeah, let's see that. Let's go down. Have you seen Paul Rogers with that wig singing? Oh, he's so great. Dude, I saw the firm. He's fucking phenomenal. I saw the firm, Joey. Did you see him with Queen singing?

No, no Did you see him with Queen? I didn't see him I saw him on video but not live The VH1 thing Yeah With the wig on and stuff He's still

He's got to be telling me now Here's the deal with them You go see him By the time you get home You can buy the concert online That's rad If they're going to download it Yeah

Not bad idea I love that comedy too A dollar Yeah Download the show Live from fucking whatever That was the one you were at A dollar

That's the way to go Yeah. A dollar right on your web page. That's it. Tape it professionally and you want the shows. These are like underground fucking comedy shows. Yeah. Yeah.

Tape them. That's it. Done. That's a new idea we're going to do. I'd like to do a crowd work tour like, you know, and then just tape it every night and give it away. Here's the night you were there. You know, a lot of people don't remember that 20 years ago, fucking Pearl Jam got penalized big time. Oh, yeah.

They got spanked. And they were only allowed to do like three shows per tour. Yeah, well, they were playing no ticket master rooms. No ticket master rooms. But what they were doing is I think in 98, they recorded all shows. And they put them all out. And they put them all out. And you would walk into a music store.

And they'd be like 40. And in a brown bag. Remember that? Fucking dynamite. You go and go, you know what, Lee went in Nashville. You said the show is phenomenal. I can buy the fucking album, right at the record store. Different set lists every night too.

Different set lists every night. You have to, you know, I like what. Nine-inch nails is doing this year. Making the fans go down and buy the tickets. I love making the full fucking experience. I got to tell you something. This is it. Like for me, guys, this is it.

What I went through with this last half hour taping, I'm done. You're done? I'm done. I'm never taping nothing, another special again. Is that right? I'm only doing albums. Oh, yeah.

Because you love because you make great money on them, right? It's not the money. Yeah. It's not the money. You know what, man, I'm a fucking old-fashioned, stubborn motherfucker. Yeah. And what I like, I like. And there's certain things that piss me off.

Like, there's certain parts of technology that piss me off because I think that people are missing chunks of their lives from not doing it. Yeah. You know, we laugh at the people in the 50s that would sit there and listen to the green haunted on the radio right you don't even see those pictures no more miracle isn't even know what that's like yeah to sit with your sister your mom and your dad in front of a fucking radio and listen and listen your brains working listen I love the gift of listening and so many fucking people ruin it they ruin it on purpose you've been

somewhere and you're with somebody and they think that they have to talk yeah yeah yeah Yeah. Like, there's no signs. Like an Uber. I'm not saying, I'm not saying that I'm communist. Yeah. I'm not saying that I'm communist, but there's no signs in this room that say we need to talk. Yeah.

Like there's certain situations that sometimes you want that peace of mind. Yeah. But there's certain people that think they need to talk. They're uncomfortable in the silence. Yeah, not to get attention to nothing. I'm not saying it that way. Just to tell you something that has nothing, no bearing in your fucking life at all. Like it wouldn't fucking matter to you at all.

They break your silence. And it kills me what technology has taken the way, the gift of listening. Yeah. You know, when I meet somebody like Keatsy who listens to podcasts, she actually takes the time to listen. Yeah. It's a gift. It really is a gift. It's a gift.

Like I got all those prior albums. like I can't wait to come in here and get I. Oh, yeah. And put on fucking, you know, was it something I said in the beginning? Oh. And listen to the skips and the album. The album is 30 years old. What do you want?

Some crap. What do you want? Fucking perfection. You're not going to have it. Yeah. But to hear that, when you listen, let me tell you some, Netflix is released and how many specials? 47. In one day.

So what good are we having here? Yeah. We're done. The special business is done. after this. I don't ever want to shoot a special again. Nobody's going to want to see a special. Now they want to see something different. The country's ready to see something different.

Yep. Whoever does it first is going to win. Yeah. You doing 30 minutes in 28 and 60, that's great. But now if they release 47 of them, we're going to be bogged up for a long time watching fucking specials. So to get your eyes off those specials, you got to do something. Yeah.

So these live albums you're talking about, were they you're saying that they weren't they were like the album but they just they recorded an entire tour and they would take the best take the best take right of each song of each song no best takes it was just that show that night went out it's when pro jam did it when the deadheads did it it's that show that night done that's it that's the way it runs some bands when they put an album together they record a few They record a few nights and they take this song from that, just like comics do. Comics will take two shows and one night and take the best from both shows.

It's no fucking different. They dress the same. Only you can't tell. You can't tell. Right. It makes more sense to, especially if it's just going to be an audio recording of an entire tour. I got stoned and speaking of Stanhope was watching a Stanhope special and I wrote him a long email. like why do you only have two chances to shoot a special?

Like that's crazy. Like it's just so expensive now. Yeah. And it's less expensive than it used to be, but it's still too expensive to shoot video. What's an ordeal, you know? Compared to an audio now, you just do every night with your Zoom,

you just bring it on the road and go, I tape nine nights. There was nothing better than walking off a stage that you just destroyed that fucking stage. And you get in your stuff and you took your pictures. and somebody taps you on the show and says, you want the sets from tonight?

And you're like, you've taped them, and they're like, yeah. And you're like, oh, my God. Thank you. Because that's what happens. Yeah. It happens for me.

I'm not going to lie to these people. It happens to me all the time. The greats are the greats because they're great at it. I'm not one of the greats for a reason. I can't do those. I did it with C-Sos. I had two mistakes.

Yeah. With C-So and with Netflix, it wasn't my best. I don't think. I think, you know, they just sent the final cut. Yeah. They just sent the something.

And you don't like it? I don't know what to stink. Yeah. I don't like looking at me. Yeah. You follow me? I don't like looking at me or I don't like listening to me. Now you're making me watch me.

Yeah. That's going to really fucking piss me off. Why don't you just make me watch a fucking tampon commercial with my grandmother in the room. It embarrass me more that. You know how embarrassing it is to watch yourself. Oh, it's the worst because you're like, I never knew I did that.

Yeah. Unless you know unless you're a fucking asshole. Yeah, yeah. Like nobody wants to see themselves. I don't want to see myself ever. Yeah. And people go out there, look the picture we took together. Isn't it?

That's great. I don't know what fucking picture he took together. I don't know what you look at it. I see a fucking old, regularly fucking prick. That's it. I don't see nothing else, you know. Yeah. So you're going to Montreal this year.

Yeah. Can you believe it? Congratulations. And what shows are you doing? I'm doing the stand-up on the spot, Jeremiah's show. Okay. I'm looking forward to that.

Then I'm doing, I think the dirty show or something, some show, and then I'm shooting the LOL show for Kevin Hart. So that's cool, man. I'm going up there next week. Congratulations. Yeah, thanks. When do you leave? Thursday, the 26th.

Watch how many fucking church Canadian fans are going to come fucking get you next Thursday. That's great time. I'm going to be in Utah. Oh, yeah. The show's almost sold out. Yeah, because you asked me to go. And then I was like, oh, fuck, I'm going to JFL. I would have done that Utah in a minute.

Yeah, there's a few tickets left. Yeah, wise guys. Wise guys in Utah for Thursday, D. It's always a play. This was... Oh, it was so fun, right? This was, like I said, this list was... I had to do a lot of thought.

Yep. I really had to think about what I'm blew my wig. And let me tell you some. I'm sure I missed. Yeah. There was a... I got Bill Withers. There was a Michael Shankler Live at Budacom.

Oh, yeah. Wasn't there? Yeah, there was. Yeah. Right, Lyman, Budakana. It came out. I remember I lent it to a guy named John Kelly, the frog. You never gave him back to me.

That cock suck. I still remember. The fog. He's called him the fraud. But he got me because he used to bartending. Whenever he turned around, we throw ice cubes at him. He would quit. He would leave the bar.

And then that's the thing. Come on, when I got to throw another ice cube at me, I swear to God, I'm going to walk out. He turned around 80 ice cubes would get thrown at him. Fuck you. But I left him meow. He never gave it back to me. Fuck that cock suck. All right.

Wise guys next weekend. And then me and Dean will be at the Kansas City Improv, August 9th, 10th, and 11th, bitches. Get your tickets. I want to congratulate you from the bottom of my heart. Oh, that. For achieving Montreal Comedy Festival. Can't believe that. You know, people always, you know, I have my crew, man.

I have my crew of young killers that I love. And I back you because I see what you're doing. Yeah. You know, I take you the phone. You guys are out there every night making it happen, not complaining, not crying, not fucking, you know, there's people who are doing it, but they complaining the whole time. Yeah. You're out there. You're fucking my age.

Yeah. I can't be out more than three nights in a row past midnight. I'll turn into a fucking pumpkin. I know. I want to honestly. And you're fucking out there. So my heart grows out to you, 55 to go to fucking Montreal. Yeah, yeah.

And I'll fucking swing these youngsters with no testosterone and your little work boots on and shit. Yeah. I'll give you props, man. I'm proud of you. I love you. And go to Montreal, fuck him up. And I'll see you when you come back and we'll go up to fucking Kansas City, eat some barbecue and let those motherfuckers on fire at the improv.

And then we're going to Boston, me, you and Lee. Then we're going to Boston. Wilbur. In September. Wow. Which has got maybe 150 tickets left for the second show. That's going to be incredible. Maybe.

The first one is completely sold out. There was nine tickets holding on for dear life. They were like Lee's button, the middle button. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was holding on for the deal. nine fucking momos bought those tickets they're all sitting separate but they bought them they said fuck it we'll go by ourselves it's great man i can't even think about that i have to like imagine it's oh you don't even know what i'm doing to you that night so i don't even worry about all right you

bad motherfuckers i want to thank dean i want to thank the christ killer but most important i want to thank you guys i want to thank kishi i want to thank you guys for fucking having our backs and listening and uh listening to whatever stupidity we got to talk about like i said next week dean will be in Montreal. Check his website out. Don't forget to listen to Part 2 of Henry Rollins. Henry Rollins is coming on our podcast a week or so before the

Showtime thing. Once he gets a date. Hopefully, you know, we're going to talk about storytelling and stuff. I don't want to criss-cross. I think he's doing Rogans also. But congratulations again on Montreal. I'll see you, motherfucking bring that Mormon Reefer.

Yeah. The shit that makes you have nine wives and shit. And I'll see you motherfuckers in Utah. I'll see you guys next Monday morning, ready to rock and roll. Stay black. Have a great week. Uncle Joey loves you.

Take care. Happy birthday, Lee. Happy birthday league.