The Church of What's Happening Now: The New Testament - #610 - A.J. Benza

Episode Date: August 19, 2018

A.J. Benza, a former gossip columnist for the New York Daily News and the host of the "Fame is a Bitch" podcast, joins Joey Diaz and Lee Syatt LIVE in studio. This podcast is brought to you by: ZipRecruiter - post your job to 200+ job sites with a single click for free at www.ziprecruiter.com/church   Blue Apron: Go to blueapron.com/JOEY to get your first THREE meals for free.    Onnit.com. Use Promo code CHURCH for a 10% discount at checkout.

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Buzz for the devil brought her to me. Are you fucking nuts? You can't even write that shit. That's Aerosmith, motherfucker. Get your wings. Seasons. A.J. Benzum. No.

Uncle Joey. The Christ killer. with a black shirt on. And not good luck for you fucking cock suckers out there. Me, I feel so badly. Are you fucking nuts? Five fucking dirty guys from Boston. Doing heroin in a fucking house.

Filty. This is it. A.J.B. in the motherfucking house. Filty. Before we even get started, I'll ask you a question. Once in. It's been daunting me.

I should have asked you the last time. What happened? What is the difference? between journalism and gossip. Well, there's no difference per se, but journalism is the talent and the practice you need to apply when you're tracking down rumors that people tend to believe to be gossip.

Let me put it to this way. It's like saying, well, I don't want to get into analogies. You've got to be a good journalist to do the job, a good gossip columnist. Just like you've got to be a good journalist to do the job of a good crime reporter or, you know, whatever the beat is. Most stories we latch on to today, whether it's something at the White House or something that's happening in showbiz, what have you, generally speaking, a lot of them begin in the gossip columns. A lot of them start as a rumor. And the gossip columnist is usually the first person on the front lines to track down those rumors. And when you track

them down, if they kind of fall out of your jurisdiction, like if they're bigger than the gossip column when I was at the Daily News, then they get pushed up to the front of the paper. And my byline wouldn't go on it because you'd give it to a reporter who covers page two, three, and four. Like those are different reporters. Those are bigger guys with bigger resumes. We may be just good in terms of how we write but they've got different jobs. They're city reporters.

If there's a story breaking about the corruption in the government, local government, it wouldn't go in the gossip column, but I might hear that rumor. I might report it out, get the story right, and then give it to the guys up front and it becomes a page three story,

a page two, which is the biggest story. So, a good gossip columnist is the same thing. as anybody. You've got to be a good journalist. It's very different now, though, because now there's very few people who are literally breaking stories. I still break stories every week in my podcast. But nowadays, there are so many outlets of things being written, so many websites, so many fucking, the internet is full of stories. You don't know who broke this story, where it began, if it's being rewritten from a paper in fucking Canada. You don't know. We just read shit and no one

cares who wrote it. No one cares who's the reporter who broke it. But 20, 30 years ago, it was very important. Oh, this is so-and-so story. It was broken the daily news. It was a big story. Like page six. Yeah, page six. Who comes up with page six? Like, page six is like Kanye West did fucking blow. Yeah, page six is, is the New York Post premiere gossip. But it's real. Like, it's legit. It's not a fucking. There's nothing fake about those. No. No, they're all real. No, because this is not the National Inquirer or Star Magazine. Star Magazine has absolute fake stories in it, mixed in with real stories. The Inquirer is the same thing.

Although, you know, I hate to shit on them because there are stories in the Enquirer that traditionally got things right forever. The Inquirer led the nation in the OJ coverage. It doesn't matter who's at the... It doesn't matter what paper or what magazine. It matters what reporter works there. You know what I mean? Like, when I was writing for Radar, okay, Radar might have a reputation for fucking just putting

shit up there. But if it's a good reporter and you happen to have good contacts and you can get to the meat of things, then it doesn't matter who you write for. It matters who's writing the story. That's what's been lost lately. No one cares who's writing the story. They just, they just, stories appear everywhere. Twitter, fucking Instagram, Facebook, there's stories everywhere. And they're written by people. Look, I used to make a lot of money as a journalist, which is not something that generally happens. But I did. And then I made a lot of money as a magazine writer. 10 grand an article for this 10 grand now if I approach a magazine with an article idea They might offer me 1500 because there's so many fucking idiots

Who just want their name in print that magazines go well My pay him 10 grand when this guy'll do it for fucking a thousand It's all it's all fucked up now But there's so much more outlets now I know that's the problem it's become less it's like Yeah it's like the fun it's like opening up more teams in the NFL you get shitty talent right Shit of your talent. No, that's what you get. There used to be 20 gossip columnists.

Now they were 20,000. Like, just to be a gossip columnist in L.A. Well, there never was one. Like to go out at night, mingle, and fucking give yourself like a different name on a fucking page. Oh, that's, that's all. No one's ever done that. And go out and go last night I went to the comedy store and the comedy was electric, but the underlying energy is fueled by drugs and whatever.

Yeah, yeah. It's so weird, like, how to be a gossip columnist in New York. Let me tell you, Joe. I was, I don't want to sound like a dick here, but in the 90s, I was as powerful a name that if I called you, your fucking stomach was in knots, because that meant tomorrow your name's going to be in the paper, and a million people are going to read it.

And it's very different than L.A. L.A. never had a gossip column. They never did. They have TMZ now, which is all of a TV, but they never had a reporter going around town and getting shit because people in Hollywood would, but you get, you get, you get enamored with Hollywood lifestyle,

and you don't want to talk about those people or write about them. Now, what is TMZ? TMZ, TMZ is a gossip or? No, it's a journalist. They tell you other shit. Journalism is just, it's all journalism. They're all practicing journalism. They just, they're good,

reporters, they're good at getting to the root of things and breaking stories or covering stories that are happening now, whether it's celebrity deaths, celebrity overdose. Harvey Levin was brilliant with what he did with TMSA. It was brilliant. It started with a kid with a fucking camera outside of the courtroom. I think at the Menendez trial or OJ trial. There's a guy with a camera out there asking questions as people came in, he started to make friends with Shapiro. He made and they started to recognize the guy with the camera, a little camera. And Harvey Levin saw that, because Harvey was a reporter at the time. He saw the way these people were gravitating toward this guy with the camera and talking to it. And Harvey said, this is suck. This is something.

Because these people who have something really big going on are gravitating toward this nobody with a camera who's being nice to them. So from that moment at the OJ trial, I believe it was, Harvey invented this whole, I'll put a bunch of people around California at all the hot spots with cameras and the stars will talk to us. Initially they didn't like it. Initially the stars hated it. And it was now they love it. Now when they see now TMZ cameras and TMZ people get preferential treatment. You what they want to be on TMZ with the new outfit, the new girlfriend, the new whatever the fuck it is. It's a whole different thing now. Now they use TMZ as an accessory to help them get bigger and more, more known. But it's all journalism. I'm not going to shit on the reporters there.

They do their job. But Harvey's got things. wired. He's got people in county clerk officers. He's got people in the court systems. The minute someone gets busted, the minute someone files for divorce, there's a phone called to TMZ, and they get it right away. To me, it sounds like, Joe, you're kind of

asking, maybe, like, it's a subject matter. So, like, if it's stuff about Kanye and Kim Kardashian, that's maybe more gossipy. I just love the whole situation. I'm a police sergeant. And a big precinct in Manhattan. Right. And James Gilafini, God rest of his soul, gets pulled over 20 G's.

Mm-hmm. 20 grams of blow, and he, my cop calls it in, blah, blah, blah, and right away, I pick up the phone, and I give a scoop to somebody who I'm, in an hour, a check, an envelope, so I get dropped off at my thing. Regardless of this, if it gets washed. Well, not in regular, not, I know, we never paid any, newspapers don't pay shit. The people who pay are the tabloid. The Enquirer, the Star, TMZ. A guy like you, you were a slick little motherfucker.

Yeah, but no money ever. Remember when Gotti became friends with that one journalist guy? John Miller. The white dude that's still around, you know what I'm saying? I was 10 steps behind him, all those days. It's crazy that when you become friends with a journalist like that, it works for you in different ways. I could feed shit into that pipeline.

Yeah, yeah. I could feed shit into that pipeline. So why are they coming to you if you're not giving them money? Why they're what? Why are they coming and giving you scoop? Here's what you have to understand. People, look, how many secrets have you been told and you kept under your fucking jacket

and never told anybody else? This is saying, three can keep a secret if two are dead. People talk. People want to tell you what they know. They burst at the scenes to tell you what they fucking know. We just spent 40 minutes talking about stories about this guy, this drug dealer, what I did with Winona Roddy, Sean Penn, Vince Ford. Al Pacino, we told stories for 40 minutes before the show started.

that are all secrets. And we couldn't wait to get it out of our fucking system. There's millions of people like that. I'll have stories. So if you show up and you hang around and you wait long enough and you get oiled up with them and sit in the booths with them

and they like you, eventually you hear those secrets. Now, you don't want to shit the bed and run away right away and burn a friendship. You just take it in, you take it in, you take it in. And then you start to peel off the stories. Then you start to get to know the lay of the land. Oh, this guy in a lot of the way. those these people.

I think this guy's a good contact for that shit. So you put it in your fucking roll decks in your head. And then as you go along, you know, maybe don't print that story about Sean Penn doing blow or blah, blah, blah, blah. But just keep it in your head. And then down the road, it's going to matter. It's going to lead to something. We talked about Johnny, Gumbah Johnny at Scores, right? You know, like I knew all the characters at every restaurant, every nightclub, every...

Now, I knew them all. What he is was just going on at Scores? Scores was 90... Explain to people what happened. Scores was the strip club mecca in America. It was in Manhattan. But for a good, I'd say 10 years, it was just everybody who went to New York, who was anybody, went to scores. The whole OJ trial went.

Every athlete went. And, I mean, they fucked the girls. You know, George Clooney would stay at a hotel, but he'd send fucking a car for the hottest five. And they'd make sure the five hottest girls would get to George at the hospital. hotel. Everybody worked through scores. It was like, it was unbelievable. It was like the studio 54 of the 90s, right? So what happened to be, uh, both the Gambino and the Genovese family had their hands on scores. They both took money out of that joint, like a what they call a friendly, like they both took out of that joint. And there was a couple

of tough Albanian kids who would call the, the Albanian thunkie of fuck and the italians the mafia scared the Albanians because they don't give a shit and the Albanians a couple of brothers named Simon and Victor Doddaj crazy motherfucker showed up at scores one night and they would say you know guys we got to close

and they'd say no we're no don't close we're here like you know they'd fucking shoot a gun on the ceiling crazy shit cowboys and you know scores at this point doesn't want any trouble because they got a lot of things they're doing that are fucking under the table and illegal like we don't don't shoot a gun in this fucking place it's

hot, don't do that, you know. And these cowboys are shooting shit, you know, anyhow. So one night, there was an argument, believe it or not, over fucking, over world, over, um, over Hulk Hogan, over fucking wrestling. These guys are arguing with some other guys. It was about Hulk Hogan and World Wrestling Federation, but, blah, bah, and it got heated. These guys got mad.

You got to go. It's 10 to 5. Fuck you. I'm not leaving. Hulk Hogan, like, like kids. And one brother had a go. gun one brother had a knife and on the way out two dormmen was stabbed and shot and the two brothers got away so big man hunt i'm in the hospital for back surgery and i get a call from the city

desk a j i'm just coming out of my fucking fog i got the morphine in me a j rich rosen you know i know you're at fucking new york hospital look there's uh there's two kids from scores i know one who uh dormen who got shot up last night You know, do you know anything about who this might be? And in my stupor, I said, yeah, it's the Albanian brothers. I'll guarantee you. Who are they? I said their names.

So now, I'm a gossip columnist, but I knew who the killers could be. The Daily News took that and ran. Of course, I was right. Now, one brother jumped in the Hudson River and swam to Jersey. Crazy fucking guy. He escaped. He was on the lamb forever. They couldn't get him.

The other brother, they got right away. But they eventually caught the other guy. he's doing fucking life the whole thing. I wrote an article in Playboy about this whole thing. And so about a year ago, this is 1997, I believe. So a year ago, it's 20 years later. I'm on Instagram,

and I see, and I get a message on Instagram from Simon Dadaj, D-E-D-A-J. I think it's Dadaj or D-D-D-Dai, D-D-I. And I'm like, why is he won't talk to me? I was petrified. Like, this is a fucking murderer.

Hey, I loved to talk to me. I really like to talk to you. And I said, my wife, I said, what? She goes, well, call him. I said, why? I don't want to murder her introduce. I got kids now.

Who needs this shit? I called them. I just want to tell you, I read the Playbar article. You handled it like a man. You were really honest about this and that. But da, da, da. And he said, you know, we're innocent. Of course they're going to say that.

It's a whole weird thing. They claim it didn't happen the way it happened. But one brother is serving life. and a sister says that the brother who's serving life is innocent and the brother who's free

actually did it and it's torn apart their family so it's you know these things happen when fucking brothers were shaking the girls down too

the girls look the shakedowns happened from the top right down the fucking the guys who parked cars had to fucking cough money up the guys who took coats coughed money up

the managers the security security guys. Everybody coughed up to the top. Everybody. The girls, shakedown city. I mean, these girls would make, you know, if you go to, if you were a Wall Street guy, you didn't pay cash, you put it on your card. It was funny money, right? So for every fucking $100 of cash, you'd spend $150 on your card. And every girl, you know, it was all, the, the poor girls would work. You'd think they'd make $100, but they've got to shake, they got to pay the fucking house mom. They got to pay the security guy.

They got to pay the guy who walked them to the car. They had it all wired. The mobsters had it all wired. I mean, they just, they made the money the most. But John Gotti Jr. would walk in there and get a fucking envelope. And then the Genovese guy would do the same thing. And it was an earn for a long time. They were both earning.

No, it's still it. It's still over. No, no. Yeah, but it's not. It's not. No, it's all over now. No, no. It's not the joint anymore.

It's done. I even watched a couple weeks ago I got home. My FC had on Copeland. Oh, Jesus. And the beginning of Copeland. Oh, yeah, that's right. They started a sport. Rapaport's walking out of scores.

Let me tell you some, Joey. It was the, you know, it was the premium in place you had to be. It was the studio 54 of the 90s. You had to go. I mean, I have so many stories. I don't know where to begin with scores. I mean, put it this way. One night, this is a small story.

One night, you know, a pitcher for the Pittsburgh Pirates, Doug Drebeck, walks in and he's fucking get, you know, an athlete will come every night. So if they were playing the Mets of the Yankees, the staff that scores would get them hammered because the next day is a game. And we bet the home team. So Drebeck comes in, and he's pitching tomorrow. And he's pitching on a Sunday afternoon.

It's a day game, and it's Saturday night. So we're getting him, the word got out, get Drebeck fucked up. Who's got blow? Who's got this? he want everybody goes to see draybeck and at four o'clock in the morning we had to lift him up and put him in the fucking town call lift him up he's a fucking major league pitcher we called everybody we knew all the wise guys we know get on the metz tomorrow oh draybeck can't walk he's thrown up in the street it's all fucking done the meds are going to cover and we all went to bed and the

mobster guys got on this heavy you sure you sure heavy and And the next day I make up and I hear it. Doug Drabeck pitching a masterpiece, eighth inning. The Mets are fucking losing, you know, seven two. Like it didn't, you know, they're animals. They're animals. Charles Oakley for the Knicks would fucking be face down, sleeping on the carpet during the playoffs against Indiana,

against Reggie Miller, against fucking, you know, against a jort, knocked out from too much fucking liquor and what have you. The next day they're playing a fucking game. Joe Namath. Oh, well, they are, those are the days. John Namich. Joshless 4 and all those clubs.

Yeah. Guy went and bought his own bar. Yeah. That Sinatra would go up there and shit. I know. That's how crazy that was. My sister and husband and my brother-in-law were dating and he said, I want to take you to Joe Namis bar. One of their first days, they went to, I think it was called Bachelor's Four.

And Namath was there. And my brother-in-law was a big athlete. And he moses up to Namath who was fucking the king, you know, wearing whatever the fuck he's wearing. and my brother-in-law is talking and he says, hey, Joe, you know, dance with my girlfriend and Namath dance at my sister and for my brother-in-law, that was like the crowning, you know,

Nameth dancing with my, you know. Meanwhile, he was, it was insane in that place. Everybody was getting fucking laid. Namath, Nameth and Mickey Mantle were two of the same kind of guys. They would just stay out late, get

fucked up. There's a lot of athletes who did that. Jason Giambi on the Yankees. Wammat scores one night. the world series just ended with the marlins beat the yankees there was a horrible showing for the yankees terrible and uh i'm wearing a yankee cap my nephew's there with yankee cap and they said there's fucking jambi and his eyes are fucking he's zooted he's fucking out of his mind and you go look at jambi i should ask him where he got his fucking coke look at him

he's out of his mind so he goes in the restroom i follow him and he's fucking pissing hey what's up jace hey man you know he has no idea that i used to write guys He's no, I am. And I go, bro, and the game before, he didn't get up to bat. Like, we had Jason Jamie as a pinch hitter who was an animal, and he decided, I don't want to bat. And the Yankee fans were like, why wouldn't Jason Jamby bat? What the fuck's wrong with him? He's a slugger.

So I go, I go, Jason, what the fuck happened then? Well, he didn't bat. And he goes, dude, we were in fucking South Beach. We were fucking out of our minds. I couldn't stand up. And you go, oh, my God. Us fucking squares are sitting home watching the World Series. And these guys are going, I'm at fucking South Beach.

I can't stand up. I'm not going to bat. Like the Yankees just got, Jason Jammi got too fucked up in the nightlife in South Beach. That's why he didn't bat. The newspapers won't tell you that. A good reporter, a good journalist will tell you that because he would have been there and seen it. That's what gossip columnists do. They would have been there at the nightclubs and said, is Giambi getting high?

Yeah. I would have contacted all the code deals. Who's supplying Giambi? And I would have known ahead of time. Like when Dwight couldn't on the Mets missed the fucking World Series. parade and he was sweating like a pig at news day back of the day there was a guy that was calling in anonymous tips to the desk saying Dwight Gooden's on cocaine and this is like the 80s people like he's on cocaine what do you mean it was

like Dwight couldn't he's an athlete it was unheard of and this guy was right good and destroy but we're out of their fucking minds but it's crazy the people that will tell you things like this is why life is fucking crazy that's why I asked about gossip column, especially in New York City. I don't know how it works here. It's only New York City. Not LA. You can't do dick. No, we know everything. You can't, and I can't imagine now

with cameras. Could you imagine? Could you imagine? I can't imagine. I'd be locked up. So I know for a fact. Like, I know for a fact. Like, I was a kid. I was 21 years old. I was working at the Sheridan Center. And, you know, Van Halen was staying upstairs. Oh, God. You know, like, I...

Forget about it. You know, I just remember different, now, that information could work in a ton of way. If you were a reporter, if you were a reporter. No, no, no, no. For me, if I know you. Yeah, exactly. There you go. You come in, you give me a package every time you come in.

That's all. You're not going to believe. That's all. You're not going to believe. Yeah, I know. I know. I know. I send up 10 cases of fucking Jack Daniels up to that.

I know. And that's an item. It's something weird. Or at the same time, you know, whether it's hookers, because that hotel knows everything. This is the saddest thing about comedy When I go to a town When I go to a town And I go check into a hotel

By the second day Somebody at that hotel Will tell me a story that I didn't ask about Isn't that see about a comic That's the secrets I'm telling you because every comic stays there Yeah but people talk People love to talk You know whether he

Fucked he like the horror Did so much coke that we wore out the table You know, like... We heard the chopping in the other room. He was telling me that there was a comic that was supposed to leave on Sunday. And on Wednesday, he was still in the hotel room. It was a college town.

Yeah, I got paid like $60,000 to do the shows over the weekend. And there was a college girl at the strip club that drove him crazy that was just feeding them pills. The club didn't even know that he was still in town. And then the hotel called the club on Thursday and said, can you guys come over here? We want to show you before we bill you. Look at the fucking table.

Oh, my God. I'm cracking coke on the table. It was chopped up. Chopped it up. Unbelievable. You know, so when little things like that, get out. That's great stuff. These are little things in a hotel room.

You know, when, when, you know, again, I work at the fucking, what's the best hotel in New York City? Jesus. The, the, the Plaza, Tene, the this. I'm a fucking, I'm a bellman at the Plaza, Antine. Oh, yeah. And I see fucking Sean Penn. walk in. And every three hours, I see a different Asian woman walk upstairs

and walk out. There you go. There you go. You're not going to believe who's here eating Chinese food like a motherfucker. You know what I do? And that's how it starts. You know what I do? You know what I do is a reporter? You know what I do? I had a guy. I had a guy. Now, we didn't pay people. The newspapers just don't pay. That's a lie. We had no money. They would never say, I need

a hundred bucks to pay the doorman. We don't do that. And very few stories came from dormant or hairdressers. But in the case where you meet a guy who works at a hotel and whatever capacity, you go, uh, yeah, I really like to hear what you know. This is the fucking hot hotel. This is the Soho Grand, whatever it is. This is where everybody's going.

Yeah, I like to hear your shit every week. What can I do for you? I really, I like to see the fucking Knicks now and then. Oh, no problem. I'll get Nick tickets for you. No problem. So on my corporate card, I fucking bang out two games with the Knicks. He goes to see the Knicks in the nice section.

And that guy's indebted. I mean, people, people will talk when you put 20 bucks in their palm. forget about a fucking seeing the Knicks play, the 90s, it was, I had the, I had the shit to grease their wheels and they would just talk. And I'll tell you,

speaking about chopping up at a hotel, I was in South Beach once when I was really on top of my game. And the E Channel was running a show called The Gossip Show where it was the precursor to TMZ. You probably never saw it. There was a bunch of journalists

and we talked to the camera and blah, blah, blah. And I'm in South Beach, you know, when it was just starting to get built up, I'm on fucking walking. Washington Boulevard, one of those art deco spots. And all night I hear this with the credit card on the fucking table. I'm like, Jesus Christ, who the fuck is next to me? And like a day later, I'm about, I'm waiting for this person to leave so I can look who's

leaving. And it's fucking Kate Moss. And she is a famous Cokehead. And I don't know, she must have recognized me because I was pretty visible back then. And I just said to her, you know, at some point today, I got to have some of the shit you're taken. And she laughed. And I think she knew what that meant. That meant that if you give me some of the shit you're taken, no one's going to know you're doing this in this hotel room.

You know what I mean? We're fine, right? But I need some of that shit. And she gave me some of that shit. And I never wrote that story that Kate Moss was in the fucking Clevelander hotel shopping lines until 4 o'clock in the morning. I wouldn't do that to her. But it'd be nice to have a little fucking taste of your shit. Okay, my lady, and she gave me some, and I never wrote the story.

So if you're out enough and you're around enough, you'll get to fucking play the game and extort people or get people in positions, compromising positions where they need to tell you things. I'm sure I can help you. You know, what can I do for you? It's just, you know, it's just a line of shit. but at its core you're a journalist and you're good at what you do and you're going to write a story so what can we do

before I go write this story? Now when you you got a degree in general sure yeah hold on I get from water so you got a degree in journalism yeah you believe in the whole system and the whole thing why not just be a fucking sports writer

I did I was I that's how I started like I would dream of being Oscar Madison yeah just covering the fucking that's it and everything that is the lake. I don't know nothing about the Lakers. I understand. But that's what I would do. I started that's, arguments towards the Lakers, that was why they need the fucking draft a guard. You would, you would fucking want to slice your vein within a year. Now, why? Well, listen, the guys I came up with Tom Voducci, Rich Chimini, Peter King, uh, someone to get Wallace Matthews are

still doing it. We all came up in the 80s. We all started as part-time employees at Newsday on Long Island and all these guys, Tom Voducci calls the playoff game. games on fucking NBC, you know, he's a major fucking talent. Wallace, Matt, all these guys I'm mentioning are huge. They stayed in the game. And God bless him. I was like, how many times can I hear an athlete go, I'm just going to take it one game at a time, man, you know, I'm going to fucking do my thing.

You know, we got to get the hit and we count it. I can't keep hearing that shit. Yeah, it's fun to see some games. It's fun to see the best athletes run up and down the court. but when you go in the locker room and you fucking say, hey man, talk about that playing in the second quarter. It's the same shit.

And I don't want to get on planes and go to fucking North Carolina and Indianapolis and fucking college. I don't want to do that. I'd rather stay in New York and cover the fucking glitzy glamorous shit. I'm talking on you. All right.

We talk like Nick Taturo. Nick Taturo lives and dies by the Yanke. I know. I see Nick all the time on Twitter. I love him. We're going crazy. Yeah. I'm the same way.

Why he doesn't do an article, like somebody like that. I'm not talking about fucking interviewing people every week. I'm talking about as a beat report. I would fucking die. Listen, journalism, to me, is also Mike Wallace. Like 60 minutes is journalism with no bad. That's the best journalism. That would push buttons.

I love all that camera type journalism. The best. I like, you know, in a way you could say that what goes on with Anthony Bordane, God rest of soul. He was a journalist. Journalist. Absolutely. He's one of my heroes. One of my heroes.

These are people who show you the world through their fucking eyes. People gain trust from you. If I tell you that this is happening and a year from now, it happens, now you'll like me more as a journal. That's why I see like when somebody goes up to an athlete and he'll go, I'm not answering questions because you burnt me. You're a fucking asshole. You burnt me. Why would you burn me if you're trying to get your name up? I'm never going to burn you.

It's a delicate dance. You got to break. You also got to be really honest about stories. If somebody dogs it and is being a jerk off or whatever, you've got to have the balls to write that story and show up in the locker room the next day and see him again. Like if you're, okay, you're an athlete. You're telling jokes at the fucking laugh factory or whatever.

I'm a journalist and I go, Joe, talk about that, the third joke in the first form of the seat you set, the joke about Cheech a Bastich. Can you explain why that's important to you? If you hear that 20 fucking times a week. Oh, I'll shoot myself. Okay. Now, I got to do my job. I got to fill the column interest for the paper.

I don't even want to ask you the question. I don't want to ask you. You don't want to answer it. That's sports writing. I don't want to ask you. You don't want to answer. Every like 10 or 12 games, there's a great game where you go, this is amazing. You hit a home run that was 500 feet. You just passed a record that demands you. There's always something that makes you get happy again.

You're in a playoff run. But I would also redeem that athlete. If I burned an athlete because he wasn't doing the job on a Tuesday, night and then he came out of his coma on Sunday and then Tuesday he did another like Bernard King Oh the turnaround

baseline jumper Yeah I just You know here's another guy that was doing Everything Bernard was an animal When I was a kid You know I knew for a fact They shipped them out to Golden State Right

And then he became the comeback player Of the year And then he went back to fucking the Knicks I know And he just leveled New York He was the king of fucking New York Like somebody like that So great.

I always love journalism. I just want to know the difference between, and I know how gossip starts. There's no difference. Especially in New York. Look, everybody, everybody understands the principles of journalism, whether you're writing, whether you're a court reporter or a street crime reporter or a gossip columnist or a music critic. You all know the principles of journalism. But don't ever think that the person who's working in the gossip,

column is not as good a reporter as the person who's covering stories for Washington in D.C. Bullshit. Because I'm fucking years removed from being in a newsroom. And I see what these assholes are doing at the White House and the fucking stories they're writing. And I want to scream. What they're doing is not journalism. For instance, Amarosa is so fucking popular now because she has these tapes and these things of Trump being a rich. Did he say, nigga?

Okay, he probably said niggia. We've all said nigger. We used to say, any, me, me, mind, mo, catch a nigger by the toe. Does that mean I'm a racist? We played that game. It's horrible. We live, we grew up in those times.

I'm sure he said it once in a while. I'm sure. We also were in love with the same black girl. We also were in love with the same black girl's family. He proposed marriage to the same girl we both dated. There's nothing racist about him. If you're going to say that he said the nigger word, that makes him a racist

according to Don Lemon at CNN and other assholes if you call a black guy stupid you're racist he called LeBron James stupid he's racist he calls every white guy asshole sneaky slimy jerk off shorty why if you make fun of a black guy you're racist

it's the same thing toughen up stop being such pussy's Don Lemon I remember when you had a bottle rocket I didn't have a bottle rocket If you took the if you took the stick off the bottle of it became a nigger That's exactly Unbelievable that even Chinese people

When you would go to Chinatown You want nigga-chice-ah? You want a nigga-knit. You have fun. You have fun with Bottle Rocket. You break the bottle rocket. You light it. They become Nigger Chaser.

And you're sitting there going, oh my God. Listen, I know. 1970s and full effect here. You know exactly. You didn't know that, did you say? No, I think I'm pretty sure no one knew that. No one knows that. You know why Mark Furman looks like an asshole for the OJ truck

because he actually said with a straight face, I've never used the N word. And you're looking, you're a cop in Los Angeles who's never said the end. Get the fuck. So in other words, you're not credible at all. Of course you've said that word. Cops especially say that word. White cops.

Now, is Mark Ferman a racist? I'd probably say he's close to the one. But I don't think Trump is not when you're in love with the chick who's part black. And no, it doesn't. No, no, it doesn't. They've got to stop believing almost. Marosa, who's a fucking dog and a piece of shit and a conniving, mean, filthy person, who everybody laughed at in the media.

Donald Trump's bringing Amarosa in the White House? What's wrong? She's worthless. And now they're looking at her as the biggest fucking story. Whatever you say, Amorosa, what else do you got? You got more tapes? It makes me sick. Oh, she got more tapes than prints.

She got more tapes than prints in that fucking vault. That chick had a tape regarding that little fucking monkey of hers. You believe that bitch? But you know what? Everybody in that town has a tape recorder on. If you don't have a tape recorder on in that town, you're out of your mind. Okay, good point. I tape people at the news. Listen, let me tell you. I grew up in Northburg, New Jersey, where the tape recorder is, was essential.

They tape everything. I know. I remember going to people's houses and they had the tape. Like when you went to a bookie joint, they had the phone with the plug into the fucking tape recorder. Right. So I call you and press record. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

And there's a microphone on the thing. In the old days, from these phones here, I would put a, you know, when you called into a numbers bank. Yeah. And you called into a bookie, you're getting taped. So if you call back and say, I had the Jaguars minus the 10. Bullshit. Hold on. I go back to the tape and player for you.

They always. So whenever you call a booking in the 70s, they always had a tape recorder. Always. My mother had tons of tape recorders at the numbers joint. Same reason. Because when they call in. So, like, I have friends I grew up with, and everything was based on tapes,

not some county, it's a corrupt town. Yeah. Everything is based on tapes. So, you know, in the old days, the super, see, now it's all completely different. Like, I was writing a story in my book the other day about my first encounter in New York. My first encounter in New York was on,

we lived on 89th in Riverside Drive. Right? My father had just died. And me and my mom lived there. and I didn't know my mom had the building wide. Right. And she had the building wide. I don't know what that means at that age.

No idea. So when I'm a little kid and the fucking, the phone rings at 6 in the morning. And I'm awake watching Pop, by or whatever the fucking doing. My mom's sleeping it off. She had the bar in Union City. Oh, yeah.

And the super goes, put your mom on the phone. And I wake my mom, Mommy, it's super. I'm sorry, super, super, super. And he said something. My mom slammed the phone, ran up, slid open the fucking closet, took a bag out.

We used to have a balcony in the kitchen, and she slid the thing open, and she dumped it in the balcony underneath, and two minutes later, you heard police open up. Holy shit. I was a kid, dog. I was five. Wow.

And they sat us both on the cats, and they separated us, but by that time, I had done PS66 used to take you to the 25 precinct or something, and they would fingerprint you, tell you laws, and teach out of your kids.

shoot a gun. Oh my God. So then one day my mom came home and said, listen, this is what goes on in this house. This is cocaine. This is marijuana. Holy shit. You know those places you go? They're number of books. My head almost exploded. And she's like, if anybody ever gives you this on the street, say no. Wow. This is what we do in

this house. But then she took our little statue of the three monkeys. Yeah, of course. Yeah. You know. The hear no. This is what you live by. This is the rule. You don't know nothing. So they busted into the house two weeks later. And then they separated us. You know, my mom spoke great English. But right away, Cuban

people and Italian people, they can speak great English. Fine. When the cops get there, no, no, no, no English. No, no English. No English. And you become the interpreter by proxy. Right. And they're telling you no they are not. Yeah, tell them there. No, I don't know nothing. It's like the Spanish girl in Man on Fire when he goes

into the disco. No, no say. No say. Nobody knows nothing in Spanish. I know. I know. It's fantastic. They know everything. They know everything. They separated. Hey, kids what? They separated you like they do with the border.

Yeah. When your mom and dad break the fucking law, they separate the kid for the night out. They put me in the bedroom. My mom in the kitchen, they ask me a bunch of questions. I played like the half retard, like Vito.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. They got in no nothing. They put us back in the couch and they left. And I never forget my mom. Like 20 minutes later, the super came up. He's like, what? I'm so sorry. My mom gave him like a handful of money.

Of course. And my mom told me And they didn't hear you go, He goes, they tapped your phone. Because in those days, they would tap your phone in the basement, and they had to put a tag on it in those days to say your phone was tapped. Amazing.

That's how you knew your phone was tapped. You went to your thing, and you broke open the phone thing. And if you looked at the thing, a little tag. Really? Yeah, in the 70s and 60s, they had to tell you. They had to be a tag. Like, I got a letter still at the house, which I should be getting a lot more.

Oh, really? I used to get a lot more. You know if you call into a wire attack, and they settle the case after the case is settled they get you they have to send you paperwork that tells you on a wiret

oh yeah I don't know that so if the feds get you on a wiretap or like the state prosecutor's office they have to let you know I used to get those letters for years in fact I still got one at the house that somebody made me bring on the Rogan podcast

I showed Rogan that's funny and there was a Genevese guy that I still talked from a kid with friends and he called me to do a benefit for them and like a week later I'm like, what the fuck is this? Just to let you know, you want to white. The thing about when they get,

when my buddy Chico was when we were living together in the city and he was working at scores and we had the, you know, it's like Donny Brasco. That movie is so real because me as the journalist, the powerful journalist, they looked at me. If you're Italian and you have a high profile job, the guys will find you because we can make money with you.

They'll find you. And if you're like me, you'll figure out a way to make money with the guys. You know, I did. I figured out a way that I can promote parties for them at their club. It's been still right my column and say, great party at this club tonight. And they would give me $500 for the party. I still did that, which is not ethical.

But I did it. And Chico's with me, and he's getting all sorts of trouble. And I go back in the apartment one day in Madison Avenue, and there's Chico, and there's a couple of guys with windbreakers on, you know, the fucking feds. And I see them in. a chick gives me a look like I'm sorry about this

and I said what the fuck is that I'm sorry and they go his name is Tim his real name hey Tim and these fucking feds they only ask questions they know the answer to

you know they're not stupid they don't fucking Tim you know you know Joe Diaz no I don't know Joe Diaz and they get the fucking book out open the book and there's a picture you and Joe Diaz together

yeah and he goes yeah I know him but I don't know the guy I never talk to him then they take Yeah, right. His name is Coco. I don't know. I don't know.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, no. That's how what I would do. But I don't talk to. I would always give me a nickname. Then they go, you don't talk to them? They got the recorder. They press play. And there's you and Chico talking like your fucking friends for a hundred years.

I thought it was my cousin. I didn't know. I was fucked up on Ambien. I'm like the Roseanne Bar. I don't know. But this is me with a legitimate job. And I'm looking at him and the feds are on him. They know everything.

And eventually he had to leave and I had to go down to the West Village. We had to separate. He had an organized crime file. It was all, it was insane. But they, you know, when the feds come into your life, like a phone tap or whatever the fuck, it gets real creepy. And then on top of the feds, Chico had tough guys after him, too. He had made guys after him. And there was a guy named Sal Scala.

I don't know where he is or what fucking position he is now. But back in the day, he was a tough guy. He was a fucking shooter, killer. And the word was because Chico, somebody met his sort of feds coming in my apartment that I vouched for Chico. so I was in trouble and Chica was going to get hit and we knew Sal Scala was the guy that was going to do it for about six months

we would always go into a restaurant or nightclub and in the middle of having fun we go, Sal Scala says hello when we fucking do the fake knife for this, you know, I mean you know, but it's dangerous but we started laughing about it. Take a butter knife to your neck,

Sal Scala says hello, you know. But I can't explain it. It was thrilling but fucking scary. What, to have somebody looking for you? To know that someone's out there. Oh, my God. You know what I mean?

He would go down to the Jersey show in the winter and live in a cabin with no electricity to be on the lamb. I had to work at the news. I loved it. I know, you see? For years, I loved hiding from people and fucking with people. And I would hide right in front of them and they wouldn't know. Hide in plain sight.

I would hide in place. What do you mean you loved it? It's a thrill, man. From 70, from 80 to 95. It's a true. In my mind, I got off on somebody looking for me. You see what I'm saying? I don't like you on.

Sometimes I'm tired, and I just let the mailman knock on my door and put the package down. The mailman can't hurt you. The mailman can't hurt you. He's going to give you a fucking catalog. Putting bets on with people. Oh, yeah. Not paying them. And then they're like, they're going to send a guy to break your legs.

You know, I had. You're like, yes. When I went back to Northburg in 84, I went on a tear of fronting. and not paying and then they would sell the paper to somebody else which means I owe you $5,000 right

fucking he hates me so much he's going to give you the five so he can go out to me so he has an excuse to beat me up that's awesome wow like I got to that point people would buy your debts oh my God people were buying I mean it was crazy I had the protection

of a cop who loved me so everybody knew if you touched that spick you're going to have to deal with this guy eventually. I had a cop like that. It was so crazy. And then it's funny because this is a different situation that, well, we'll finish this thing on the hunt.

Mike, the guy who baptized me. Yeah. The guy who threw water in church with his wife at the time and he was, you know, to this day, it's a painful situation for me. Why? Because I plain out fucked him. Oh, it's terrible. The guy that...

The guy that baptized you fucked? When I got old on my father died he would pick me up every Saturday. That's hardcore. Every Saturday, take me the 42nd Street, a movie theater. Listen. Get me high. That's hard core. He would get me high. No, the fact that the guy who threw water on you, you end up fucking, like...

Listen to me. Listen to me. But there's more of the story before. This is like from a journalistic look. He was for four or five years every Saturday. He'd pick me up at 9 the morning wherever I was, tell my mom, see you later. And he was a savage. He would take me somewhere. I know. We didn't know.

No, no, no. His name was Gobilon. No, I don't know. Gavilon Caballero. Wow, cowboy. He would pick me after he was a Cuban guy that grew up with my dad. They played like baseball together as kids. And he baptized me.

My dad died in the Cuban and Italian culture, when you have godparents. Yeah. And something happens, they automatically have to step up. Right away. Like your Godfather has to come in and go, come on, you come and live with us. No matter what, that's the word you give. Yeah. When you throw that water on that, that.

That's the word you give. We were tight until about I was 10. And then he would go to Miami. He was like a Coke sales. Whatever he was doing. He would disappear and then come back. Well, he was tight. When him and my mother, when my mother died, he got tight with me.

And he did check in with me for a few weeks. And then in my world and his world, we lost communication. And I actually forgot about him. And in 84, when I was going through my fucking, my mother was definitely dead now. Right, right. realization that this change coming back. I went off the deep end. Yeah.

And I bumped into him one day. And I'll never forget that. He goes, look at the shape of you. What happened? And I go, I don't know. You know, he took me this lesson. He bought me a winter jacket. Like, I mean, guys, that's how pathetic I was in 84.

He bought me a winter jacket, a couple of sweaters. What I didn't want that. I wanted a handout. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? I wanted $5,000 to get me straight. Which I was not going to get you. I was going to use to snort coat.

Of course. So I became friendly with him. I would go to his house and eat. He would talk to me. He never offered me a bedroom. You know, so kind of like I was getting pissed off. He's not giving me what I'm supposed to give me. And then one day he goes, listen, if you need to make money, I got a way to help you out.

Sell some ounces. And I would sell ounces and I played them. I played them for six or seven months. I played them. You know, if I told him I'd have the money Thursday, and I have a Wednesday. And then one day I took a big chunk from him. He says, I got to leave for the weekend. you want more and I go you know what leave me the amount give me like five of those God and I went on a tear

I never paid him gone he wasn't like the regular people I had burnt before yeah he hunted me down sure and he hunted me down I did the time of the final result was October of 84 and in June of 85 I was in front of a white castle taking a bus with a bag headed to Newark airport and he pulled up really with a motorcycle He was still looking for me. Wow. And he said, the next time I see, he goes, you caught me off guard. I've been looking. And people were telling me, oh, he comes into bars all the time looking for me.

Oh, that's so fucking scary. And he goes, the next time I see I'm going to put a bullet in you. And he took off. I disappeared until 91. And in 91, I went back and went to West New York. And I had half his money. All right. And I went to my stepfather.

And I go, where's guy being? And he goes, bro, he don't want to see. The only thing he wants to do is put a bullet in you. Yeah. And then when I had a kid, I the guy that baptized my kid's name was Pete Lee and Mary Lou McGuire we don't speak anymore but Pete pulled me aside when he was dog I was in Fort Lee about a year ago I was strong coke with these guys oh shit and your name came up and there's people

looking for you yeah like whatever you did the Union City and all those years there's people fucking look oh my god I used to get off on that that's bad but the biggest one I did was 85 I took this guy for everything and he lived in Westley's York. So the word was out. I was in Colorado, but I was really in Creskill, New Jersey. And I was going through the city, seeing his friends, but he was a fucking West New York guy that wouldn't leave West New York. He was such a Coke dealer. Yeah, yeah. And it's so funny how, you know, I just got off on it. And then when they were, like, I owed this guy 60 fucking grand for blow. Oh. And I just took off in 87. That's death money. You're going to get killed.

In 87, I just took off. 86. The winter of 86 was when I got arrested. 88 was when I got sentenced. Oh, my God. I owed this guy 60 Lodge for Coke. How did they let you have? I owed because it was 35 a kilo.

Oh, okay. So I would talk him to give me kilo. 32 or something like that. So I owed him for like two. I owed his organization. Right. The people he dealt with, I owed close to $120,000. Easy, easy, easy.

like you, him, but you didn't know that I was getting from AJ and they didn't know until one night you got together and you're like that fucking die. He owe you money too, that motherfucker. And I found out he owns fucking the kid money. So I'll never forget when I got separated from my wife,

I rented a car and I drove up to Aspen. I parked the fucking car. Who do you fuck that I bump in? Three minutes after I was walking. His name was Jay Fredericks. Look at that. I'll never forget his name. And he came up to me and he goes,

I gave my hug, like, nothing happened. Hey, hey! I searched him for weapons when I gave the hug to make sure he was with some brunt. How are you doing? Where do you live now? Like, nothing happened. And they goes, hey, can I ask you a question?

What happened to that money? God. Who knows, bro? Good to see you. Oh, shit. And I just walked away from him. So I was like, Jesus Christ.

Right, right. You owe me 70 grand, 60 grand. How do you sleep at night? I'm going to get a fucking phone number. We send me 30 and wash me off. Do you have extra locks on your door? Are you nervous at all? No.

Jesus. The only time that the worst time for me was when I was, it was 84, 85, before God he was Godfather. I had a guy that my guy I was giving gambling information too, who was a big gambler. He was giving me money up front to handicap his games. And then his bookie died in Nebraska. That was from Colorado, big stockbroker. I said, Paul, I got a guy in Queens. My cousin works for a guy in Queens.

You know, I can get your this and that. But you got to send money up front. The whole thing, he sent five grand up front. I set him up with God. He's organization in Queens through my cousin. I didn't met John yet. And I got money because I was doing something called halve sheets where you bring a gambler in and whatever. Right, right, right.

Okay, so I was doing half sheets with this guy. So I got a few dollars the first week. Paul Hicks lost. the next week he loses the third week he loses and now you know my cousin Albert tells me you know John's upset

this guy's not paying and I go this is like the 80s I gotta call him you know there's no cell phones you got a home number and that's it he's not picking up and I said finally I got him

I said Paul my name is Johnny Rock back then I said Paul it's Johnny I said listen this is not your fucking your guy in Nebraska these are real people in New York no I know Johnny

I said yeah but you know you can't fucking skip away when you want money you gotta pay I promise He said, I really want to bet this weekend. I got games on a bet. So I talked to my cousin Al, but I said, Paul wants to bet.

So John got in the phone and said, let him bet this weekend. But whatever he loses this weekend, plus what he owes, he's got to pay Monday, and that's it. I said, no problem. I told Paul the same thing. He goes, Johnny, absolutely. He bets, bets, bets. He bet like nine, fucking 11 games, you know, stupid fucking, stupid teams, like DePaul versus Creighton. Like, really?

he fucking he ends up being down 30,000 but he had the money and I go okay so Paul you know Monday you got yes Johnny I got it Monday comes nothing and

the next day Tuesday they get a check for $500 in Queens by mail and this is like the 80s God he's out of his mind there's cock sucker so I get a call this is Thanksgiving morning I'll never forget I'm with the family

my mother didn't want me to talk to my black sheep cousin Albert because she knew he was in the mom for AJ it's Albert I go okay what are you doing nothing Albert listen your fucking guy Paul he sent 500 they're out of their minds John's going to call

you can stay by the phone John calls 10 minutes later and those recordings you hear of Gandhi when you hear the documentaries I got that and he said you know a bunch of things but basically he said you know you're going to go down this fucking guy I didn't get become John Gotti because of cock suckers like this fucking guy.

And he said, in a business without ethics, we got to have ethics. I love that statement. It's the best. And then he goes, I'm going to say, you and your cousin of Colorado and you're not going to go fucking skiing. You're going to get my fucking money. I'm a fucking kid. You know, I'm 22 years old. It was like

I can't go to college. How do you? I never wanted an airplane before. I've never even flown to Florida. I was petrified. My stomach was turning. Albert's like, AJ, you better get this guy. And all you could do was call. Then I started sending letters because that's all you could do. The letter came back.

The fucking house was abandoned. Occupant, whatever they said. Occupant gone. It was like a really weirded statement. About a month later, well, December 14th comes the big hit on Castellano, Spark Steakhouse, the whole thing. And Albert says, this is a whole new fucking thing. John's the boss.

The guy John is not the boss. I'm like, oh my God. God and what does this mean about me you he goes I don't know and then about a month later he just said all right don't worry about it's all but John it's it's gone you can do no but they let it go I know but he just he ate it he ate it he John ate it I mean the guy didn't get killed the guy he ate the bullshit and I didn't get in trouble but then when he went to his trial in New York by this time I'm a journalist now for newsday 91 92 I would go to see his court trials I wanted to pay my respects.

And he saw me. And I'm in an elevator with him. Sammy the Bull, Jackie the nose, all these fucking guys. And I remember it. I put it on my book. Sammy, who I didn't really know at all? He says, John, you know, who's this guy? Like, because I'm a fucking guy in a three piece, two-piece suit and a journalist.

And he says, no, he's all right. He's all right. And he said, yeah, but he's with them, meaning the journalist. And John says, he's more right than them. the best line more right than them and i went to the restaurant i was 10 steps behind john miller we went to jambones which is on march street right across on the courts i had a table next to john and he told me you're a good kid he went to college make you mother proud get away from this bullshit so it's very strange when i see him talking to his son in the fucking jailhouse thing you know

but to me i was a civilian to him i was just a kid that got mixed up you know and he said to me make your mother proud. You know, you don't belong in this area. Boy, but then when Chico got mixed up with the momsters and they beat the shit out of him

and left him in the street for me to pick up and I vouched for Chico, I got them all these jobs at nightclubs and then I was the guy on the hook because you vouched for this fucking guy.

Oh my God. When they're after you, when they manage you, you know, I don't know how you left on the lamb that's feeling in the pit of your stomach when guys are after you. Oh my God.

Totally better real quick. I'll go out. Let me go. The worst. I want to be around to pick up the pieces when somebody breaks your heart. Some somebody twice as smart as I'm a somebody who will swear to be true as you do. somebody who will swear to be true as you used to do with me. To learn that misery loves company, wait and see, see how he does it when he breaks your heart to bits.

There was a time I couldn't function if I wasn't in trouble. That action, that trigger, that I was a loser, that trigger. Really? So I didn't, like, there was a guy I used to, when I was a kiddie on Joe Marys.

Oh. A bar. Oh, not that one? This is a North Bergen. And he was a loan shark. And I know he was, somebody once told me, George is a lone shark. George de Greek.

He was really Italian. Right. Isn't that great? George, George. George was a lone shark. and he had a bartender named Lila and we would always go in there we were 15 and one day when I was 16 I just went up to him I go george can I talk to you for a second he just want I need to borrow 250 he goes it's uh 250 for four uh it's 10 weeks or 40

okay and I started with that and then I paid him to 400 and then you know I have to ups to 500 and you're in it then I upped them to a thousand yeah pay him and one day I went to him and I'm like I need this amount and it just kept going and then I would go up to him and You know AJ Benson? Yeah. He needs this amount. He doesn't want to ask you. I'll vouch for him, no.

And then I would go to him and go, Lisa, I am. You know, the guy, yeah, he comes in a nice kid. He got his girlfriend pregnant. I was a thousand for abortion. I had this. So I was paying him from three or four different accounts. You didn't even know that I had used your name. What did it get you high or something?

To like new customers have a low-intosh. The word vouch is so important. So I would say lease and barish, you know, leasing. He can't come over here. He's a virus. He doesn't want to. But he wants $1,000. Give me $14, $140 a week for 10 weeks.

No problem. And I would put you all in time. Oh, my God. And I was going to him. And then I got to a point I was just making up names. Of course. Chichibati-Bastee. I cheetah-busts me $2,000.

And I had this guy. Dog, in my head, I was paying him eight different accounts. Unbelievable. Until I had him up to like $40,000. And I left. But Joe, so that gets you high, that, feeling like that that time so at that time so at that time that's who I was it was a fucking creepy okay so I never forget going back eight months later and I go to his bar because that's

where you had to go get the pills and the coke and I'm in the back there's oh every bar has a back door close to the pool where they're putting pool and I'm knocking on the glass me and stink was not going on the glass I just get off the plane I already owe this guy 40 G's and on top of that I owed another 40 throughout scattered and I want to end to People who, you know, I used to rob drug dealers, and then they were too scared to approach me, so they would go to wherever they got the drugs from them and go, listen, we can't touch them. You go after them.

Oh, my God. So I had a bunch of people looking for me for that. But the funniest thing was George when I knocked in the glass, and I'll never forget, Ray Tabasco looked at me. Ray Tabasco. He looked at me, he goes, what's up? I go, was George in there? He goes, what?

I go, is George in there? And also I hear, no, George is up here. And I go, hey, George, how you doing? He had his head, because he lived on top of the bar. He goes, how are you doing? He goes, how am I doing? What the fuck have you been? I go, George, I had to go on vacation.

I got your money. Come on down. He goes, I'll be right down. Dog, he didn't put his head to me with him. Gone, you were gone. Me and Stinky got in that car and fucking ran the fuck out of there. Oh, my God. We had loan sharks that we were borrowing from him.

Let me tell you how good of a loan shark he was. I'm listening. I'm listening. In 79, my mother dies. And, hey, I don't know what the statute of limitations is, the story is a story so you can all suck my dick you're looking up before you say you got to you got seven you got you're fine you got to prove you're fine when I'm a kid you're my mother dies oh the greatest things I have 89 my mother dies in 79 oh 79 I got a job at a lumbia

yard okay the lumber yard is owned on paper by a white dude six foot six nice guy but in real life this thing is owned by a bunch of different people and at the end and they would give me boxes Every week, one of my jobs is to get a box and to go to the post office and put mail into just bills. Right. You know, in those days, it wasn't computer bills. No, you threw it in. You got all your bills in the mail. So you were building a house.

If you were a plumber, you got a bill from us. And I go through, you know, a bunch of letters fell on the floor because I was, fuck the post. I was, I just walked to the corner. I'm going to go to the post. Yeah. There's a fucking a box. Put them in the box. Right there.

So putting them in the box and a card falls out. And when I go to pick it up, I hit. Oh. And I go, I put my soul in my pocket. You're the worst. I'm living with the benders, and I go home,

and there's two credit cards. A big-time credit card. I'm one for gas. Oh, sure. Gas cards, a mobile card. And there was two checks in there. I'm not going to tell you the amounts. Okay.

And I took the card, I didn't know what to do with the cards, or the amount, and I went to a friend of mine, who his brother was half-connected at the time. He was a little older. he had just got out of college the guy

but I knew he ran in weird circles in fact he's anyway I meet him and I tell my buddy I go I got these playing the cons I got these checks

and next thing you know let's go I'll show you guys something before you leave next thing you know he's because he goes my brother wants to see you like okay he comes up to me

I give him the two checks I give them one check is significant. The other check is half of that, but not bad. And I show them to the mobile card or the American Express card. He looks me in the face. He goes, I'm going to give you a gram for the American Express. Nice. He goes, the gas card, depending on the limit, I'll give you a thousand.

Because these are Italians. They're everybody and the family bought tires. They all over the old. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Nobody's going to lose. I've had those cards. They're not going to buy tires.

Now, we're not going to buy gas. They're not going to buy fucking times. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. And they would buy tires and shit with it. And then the next day, he called me. He goes, I got your cash for the checks. I go, how did you cash those checks?

He goes, that's my business. It was the year that, it was the year General Lennon got shot. It was that week. What was that, 81? 801. Bro, he laid a, it was 20 grand plus. Oh, my mean, yeah. In 20s.

And I put it in my drawer, it was like my own little ATM machine. Oh, that's brilliant. I would fucking pop that motherfucker. And then I was telling these guys that. about 82 when the first ATM machine got put on my block. And from 9 to 3, if you put, you wanted $20, the 20 would come out. But if you went in there at midnight, in those days you had to put your card outside, the door would open, and you walked in.

It was in 70th and Bergenland Avenue. Dog, do you know that machine, you spit out 20s at me? No. Instead of 200, instead of 20, it would give me 200. And I did this for months. You can't leave. For months. I would take my buddies, and I tell Lee, Lee.

Watch this. We're going to go on to do a gas day. I remember one guy made him ducked the whole time He was ducked in the back seat What about the cameras? Don't worry about the cameras We robbed this ATM machine Do you know I wanted to Fed shut up in my house, bro? And they were like, dog, you owe us like six grand

I know, I'm like, what are you talking about? I don't know that, yeah What the fuck you're talking about six grand? No comprehend, no comprehend. I went and got money out of the machine They're like, well, every time you go The machine is always light at night Bro, I had tons of friends

And then, let me tell you something, I had a friend before the eight, Let me tell you how much technology has grown for you young kids at home. Oh, God. I had a friend. That was a genius. He's still alive, knock on one, he's still a fucking genius. Yeah.

When they came to making money the old-fashioned way, he was a genius. Yeah. Today he has a house down the shore. He's retired. I know. One of his biggest games was going to college. I mean. Going to college, he would take every loan available to him.

And what he would do is he would open up 2,000. dollar bank account in every line of bank so chase right i don't know who it was in those yeah yeah whatever names i'm saying manufacturer's hand-on-a-america he would put two thousand five bank accounts right he would leave it in there for six months and then he would take a two thousand dollar loan in each of those bank accounts nice on the bank so he would go i want to borrow two thousand on the two thousand i got in there why i do not know he got ten grand now so he would make a bunch of payments, like two or two payments. Then he would pick one every week

under different aliases. So he would go to Chase on Friday at 5 to 3 and close his account. And then he had a predetermined route to a chase in Brooklyn, who the computer system was too slow. Oh my God. He would go to Chase and close the account

that he had with Chase in Manhattan. So he would keep closing the account. So then he would go to Suffolk. So if the bank was open until five, whatever account, he would close at five after three. This is an 82 guy, 83. Yeah. So he was double his money. I mean, it was just amazing how slow the process was between computers.

Wow. So if you went to the, so today, certainly speaking here, I would close my account at downtown. Right. And then run to Sherman Oaks. Jesus. Close my account there. Then you run to Woodland Hills. And close my account there.

Yeah. Takes you forever. But they wouldn't catch on until Monday. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I see if on a Friday, you do it, they don't catch out until Monday. Nothing. You're a fucking ghost. You're done.

You got your money. He would take 10th, he would make 50 grand. Right, right. This is how crazy life was. But they get to something else, and they call these people rats, but they're not rats. No. When I was a kid, everybody knows. Like, when you read a mob book, Peter Mass.

Let's say that's his name, right, Peter. You wrote a couple of books. Sure. Where has he got this information from? Do you think he gets his information from the air? You talk to a lot of guys. You talk to a lot of guys. People love to talk, I told you.

And you make sources with certain sources and stuff like that. When you're telling stories, that doesn't make you a rap. Like, I had a cop growing up, but I became friends of it. And he would shoot me little things. Yeah. And I would shoot him little things. Right. He would tell me, these guys are going to have a kilo at their house.

rob him. What do I care? And I would rob him. Yeah, that's good. And if somebody was breaking my balls, right. Like, if I would rob Lee, and I heard Lee threaten me, I would put him on Lee. Yeah, yeah. You know what I'm saying? Listen, every Friday of six, Lee delivers a kilo-cooked AJ

Fenza. Pull him over. Yeah, no, cut the way. Listen, when I was a... And don't arrest him. When I was... Take him. When I worked for the news... Make him lose the 20. In 90, in 97, I beat the shit out of a cab driver. Bad. I beat him bad. I mean... broke his cheekbone, his leg.

It was horrible. I destroyed him in the street. Fifth Avenue and 40th Street. Why? I was with my girlfriend, and we were late to get her kid at a kindergarten, and this cab came by, and I put my hand up, and he had the light on.

He didn't stop. It just happened like that. He didn't stop. Piss me off. And I had a black girlfriend, right? Same girl Trump was dating, but this is when I was dating her. Beautiful black girl.

I felt like the guy didn't like that. It was with this beautiful black girl. That was in my head. He doesn't like that I'm with this beautiful model, black model. He was a fucking, like a Haitian. Boom, he passes me, and I give him the finger back, and then he stops to the red light. So I run to the red light. She goes, don't do it.

I said, no, fuck this guy. I get up to the red light. What's your problem? He starts cursing, whatever the fuck, and he spits at me, and he hits me in the head with a spit. So I clock him through the windows down. I knock him in the fucking face. And then he goes down on the receipt to get something. So I opened the door and I fucking destroyed him.

I lay him out in the front seat just right, right, right, just destroying him. So many times that people grabbed me off of him. It was commuting time. It was 5 o'clock. Guys are going, get off of him. Are you fucking crazy going to kill him? I was out of my mind. My girlfriend's screaming.

He comes out of, and I'm shutting the door, and the door keeps bouncing open. I'm banging the door. Boom, bang, boom. And I go, what the fuck? His leg was hanging out of the car. So I broke his shin because I kept slamming like a peshy move. That's one of the doors. Anyhow, after all that, the guy gets out of the call, like the fucking walking dead.

He's limping at me. And I go, what is this guy doing? And he looked like one of those guys that Jake Lamontafort and Raging Bull who had nothing left. He throws a looping fucking, I duck under and I smash him, out like a light, knocked out. And everybody's screaming. I just sat down next to him. I told my girlfriend, go get Nick from school. I'm staying here.

Cops come. They knew who I was. AJ, the winner goes to jail. Lose it goes to the hospital. You're going to jail. So I was in jail for the night. Anyhow, I call my detective friend who I would always talk to was a journalist. He gave me information. I said, Dave, this fucking guy, he's a Haitian, he's a fucking immigrant. Look into this guy. He couldn't speak English. We got it. Don't worry about it. And they go, but the time we get to him, he isn't going to fucking chart. He isn't going to come after you.

It's going to go away. So they go after him and they worked them all over. I mean, they did. They told me We worked him all right. He's illegal. He ain't going to say shit. Don't worry. It's great. Thank you. A week later, Dave, my detective, Dave Oldermatt, who worked at Midtown North, him and about five other cops got busted because there was a whorehouse nearby. All the cops would visit and get blow jobs and let the whorehouse operate. There was a sting operation. All the cops who did it got fucking thrown off the force. They lost their pension. So my guy was one of the guys that got thrown off. AJ, I can't help you. I said, you got to. Are you kidding me? The fucking Haitian's lawyer heard that.

He marched the Haitian into court with the fucking Walker and the cane and the eye patch and everything. And I fucking was guilty. And then I played out. And then I got sued from the civil trial. They sued me for $10 million. We settled on $80,000. Paid this fucking asshole, $80,000. The point was, I had a cop like that.

That's happened. You got friends in high places. Let me ask you. You're giving out beatings. Are you friends of John Menendez and now starting to John? Sure. I actually, I let him smack me back. I had one of those podcasts two years ago. I said, smack me back on the air. No, I said, yeah, just do it. Get even. Yeah, we're friends. We're fine. That was just a fucking, what was that? 2000, 1990. I think it was 2000 when I smacked. It was a crazy, you know, the house search. I was never, I was never straight when I was in Hollywood stuff. Very rarely was on your book. That's why I wanted to read it. I want to get it to read. I got to go.

No, this book, 74 and Sunny is from when I was a kid. Right, right. The first book was I was out of my mind. What was the first book? Fame ain't a bitch. That's the one that tells about the pills and the fucking... Yeah, yeah, I was out of my mind. That you were writing on pills and shit.

Out of my mind. I was out of my mind. I was a fucking rock star gossip columnist. Yeah, I was fucking nuts. Now, when you were gossip columnist, let's forget about the journalist. When you were gossip columnist, did you have a bartender that called you and said I got some information. Sure, but I didn't. Yeah, I did, but I didn't need that.

I was wired all over. Yes, of course I did. You get a grab of a blow or something? I didn't do blow in the city. That was not my thing. My thing was, I was a pain pill guy. I drank and took pain pills. I never did cocaine in New York City when I was an adrenalineist ever.

I mean, ever. When I came to L.A., I was like, oh, cocaine is a currency out here. If I get a girl at a nightclub and she wants to go back to my house, she asked me if I got blow. I never had blow. I said, I guess I got to get some blow. Like I need scotch or vodka or fucking club soda, you need cocaine at your house, too. I never did coke in New York ever. I was to tell my friends

if there's coke at this fucking party I'm not taking my nephew I was against it but pills sure pills pills and liquor that was my thing So now with your podcast are you still doing It's more gossip sometimes You know Joe it's I I riff on I'm no different than a comic

I swear to God You know you riff on things You riff on what is ever happening in the world Whether it's Trump or fucking Hollywood Whatever you riff on I look at what's happening Mainly in Hollywood it. And I go, how can I connect myself to that story? Can I get personal with that story? Yeah, I know

Sean Pan. Yeah, I hung out with so-and-so. So my show is a lot about, yes, it's gossip, but I break stories because I still have connections to a lot of people. And a lot of my show is about my personal stories about the people I talk about. So if I'm breaking a story about, I don't know, like whatever, whatever's happening in the news, I can go, oh, I can make the It's funny. Like, for instance, Amorosa is talking about Trump being a racist. So for Monday's show, I'm going to talk about, or today's show, I'm going to talk about I'm the only person in the fucking country. You can tell you Trump's not a racist because we used to date the same black girl. And I know how much he loved her family and all this. You could say what you want about Trump. He might have said the N word. Like I've said the N word, doesn't mean he's racist. Just calm the fuck down. You know, no one else is qualified to tell that story but me. So I'll tell that story and I'll give Ammaron. gross of shit and I'll tell my story about the girl we dated, blah, blah, blah. So, there's always

something that comes up. Bethany Franco's boyfriend, Dennis Shields, OD, I know the real housewife people, I can talk on that. Well, I remember why I called you the one day was telling me about the purse check that the day she committed suicide because the boyfriend was gay. I dated. Her husband was gay. The playmate who drew

a kid out the window? Which one you're talking about? Because that was my girlfriend for a while too. Who's husband was gay? Listen, if I dated a playmate that the kid out of the window, I wouldn't talk That was my, I dated. I think we're talking about Kate Spade. I didn't know how it was gay. You broke that.

I broke. No one cares. No one cares. The guys are fag. No one cares. I said, I said, I got a feeling this guy's gay. So I put the word out with some cops in the city because I still got connections. I said, let me a favor.

You know, okay, she hung herself or whatever, but I got a feeling this guy's gay. Detective's going back three days later. You know, you're right. He has a lover. And when the, you know, cops want to rule out everything. So detectives look. everything. They got surveillance tape on different buildings, you know, and you know,

this guy keeps coming to this building with this guy, and they're leaving holding hands, they're leaving with his arm around the other guy's waist. And we took him in a room and we talked about his, you know, his lifestyle and he goes, I don't want that getting out. You know, I went on the podcast and said, I was right, you know,

Spade is gay. I fucking knew it. I don't know if that's why she killed herself, but I'm sure that's a contributing factor to not being happily married to a man who has a male lover. and when she left the note that said asked daddy to her daughter that's a little fucking weird like ask your father why I'm miserable

or whatever so I thought that was a good angle to the story nobody in the mess in the mainstream media writes that he's gay I don't know what to say okay don't write it I think it's fascinating that that's a they don't care the mainstream media is terrible now all they care about

is how bad Trump is they don't give a fuck about stories that are everywhere that I don't know what they're just They're dropping the ball on everything They just want to talk about how much time How bad Trump is and how bad America is doing It's fucking gross

There's so many great stories out there You know going back to that police thing It's so weird Even when like fucking people fuck with me I got a cop I call now Like the cop that helped me find my daughter And I got him because I have a daughter I just probably investigated now

For like a hundred bucks He's like anytime you have a problem Just pay pay me That's it In a couple weeks of weeks He was a fucking idiot said sometime when I PayPal the guy, Yardstick. And I get everything.

License numbers. Right. Fucking blah-ba. License plate numbers. I get everything, dog. Where your parents live. I get everything. That's real fucking chamber torture

because that's how I grew up. Yeah. That's how I was raised. You just don't go for the law. You go for the fucking head. I'm going for everything. You know the fucking man a lot. Take him out.

Take him out. I'm going to go for everything. So it's so weird how we use, I used cops. You know, I love cops. You know what brought me into the fold? Bo Dietl brought me into...

Bo Dito's coming on the podcast. Okay. He's coming on. He's coming in. He's going to come here? Yeah, yeah. So we'll get him. That day you see it, call me.

I want to just say hello. I don't have to be on. Come on over. He's doing a book. I love Bo. Because I think he's in a movie that's coming out. Yeah. He's in something in December.

We did a TV pilot together for a movie called The Neighborhood, which I don't think it's going to get picked up. But Bo's in that. No, that's what you would do with Nick. Tutor and old. Who knows. Who's the network? Dude, listen, it's good enough.

We shot two episodes. I swear to God this is good enough to go on a network. I don't mean ABC, CB. Hulu, fucking TBS. It's absolutely good enough. It is. I'm waiting to hear. Anyhow, fucking Jimmy Russo,

Paul Ben Victor, Nick Totoro, it's way good enough. It is. Anyhow, we'll find out. What days do you put your podcast out? I'm on now with the new, I'm on Patreon now, so I'm every day. I do a fucking show every day.

now. And on top of show every day, I also do, well, the three free shows are Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. But my Patreon, people get a show every day, every morning. I also put out chapters of my untitled book that I'm writing now. I also get... See, that's why I like what you do. And that's why I like that. A lot of work. I don't like Patreon at all. At no level, especially me because I started out for free. I can't switch the game. I hate the advertisers. I'm switching. I hate the advertisers, but I'd rather I don't want a gun to my head. If I was a journalist,

well, I don't know, but you've got a good, you got a terrific following. No, no, the following is great. You've got years of this behind you. If I had, if I was a journalist, like if I wrote well or took pictures well, or even was willing to tape more of my shit without,

I would have some type of pantry on. Well, you should. It's worth money. It's worth money. But I don't want the time. Listen, that's great. All I do is I record mostly record from my home or I go to a studio and I give people a 50. My daily show is only 15 minutes, but the three weeklies are 45 minutes.

But then I give them the Patreon people get an untitle, a chapter from my untitled book, which is like a 30-minute read. They also get classic Hollywood scandals. I did one in Fatty Art Book. I did one in Sinatra. I give them a lot. So right now it's just starting. It's a good start.

We got a lot of people that have joined up. You still write every day. I write every show. I'm getting addicted now. I write every show. I'm even thinking of taking the journalism course. I wanted to tell you that I wanted to call you and go, you're writing your book. Please, I don't mean let me help you write, but let me give you an idea how to start each chapter because I know exactly how you think.

And the way you tell stories is so great that I can make your storytelling ability fucking jump on a page. Instead of, I know how you are, I know you think, how do I tell the story about Chi-Bastiche? I know, it's like so many different things coming at you. All you do is you pick a time, you say, if you start at a nightclub, you just say something as simple as the laugh factor, you're on a Friday, 8 o'clock, usually looks like this. There's so-and-so in a corner, this one's doing this,

there's this happening at this hour, on this particular night, boom, this happened. Then get into your story. I think there's easier ways for you. No, no, no, no, I'm learning. Easier. Listen, man, I'm learning something that... Writing is great. I did not know.

I didn't have the respect I had. It's hard, though. I thought it was like stand-up. When I got into stand-up, when I got into stand-up, when I got into stand-up, I thought those guys just shut up and got a microphone. No. And somebody was there with a camera. No.

And that stuff was fresh. I didn't know that you worked out. I didn't know that you had to get on stage. Same thing happened to me with writing. I thought that you could just write how I tell a story. No. And then I read it, and it's fucking pure. trash and I got to start. You know how many books I've written already? I'm sure. I know. I know. Now,

want me to tell you to tell you, this last three months have been the best three month writing. I could tell you haven't talked, you haven't said anything bad about you were agonizing over for a while. 50, I was in, I remember, I was in debt. I listened to you. last November. I know. To June 4th. I remember. I lived in a personal health. I heard you. And there was two weeks after that. It was my head, my stomach was. My stomach was. was bothering me my confidence was down I was just in the pits and some most people go see a psychiatrist I didn't I knew something was wrong and I got a new notebook right and I wrote just right man I just kept writing it and I saw what was coming out it wasn't good it was just coming

out and it was lack of confidence somewhere along the line yeah I lost my bravado that bravado there was two things that happened I shot the special I saw everything You told me, you called me. You didn't like this happen. This happened. Yeah, I saw Whitney Cummings on stage. And then that dumb fuck said something to me online. You told me, yeah.

Dumb fuck said something to me online. I know. I'm fucking mule. Yeah. I said, this is because I showed weakness somewhere. Right. The weakness is done. Don't get rid of that.

Like, I'm not going to these places. I went to the improv the other night just out of, because he's a good friend of mine. He's a great kid, and Arsenio fell out. And he always drove me a couple yardsticks. And he puts on great shows. Right. What's his name? Brian Monarch.

I love him to death. But I'm a comedy store guy from now on. If you want to be a green beret, you've got to hang out with green beret. That's good. That's it. If you want to hang out, if you want to hang out of green beret, you're going to hang out of green berets. Right. You know, I was dicking around and trying to hang out of different clubs.

That's not going to work. Yeah. It's not going to work. Good. For me to get that energy back and what the fuck I was. Like, right now, usually, I have a spot. Yeah. And I'm nervous.

I'm not nervous for them. I don't get a fuck. That's it. Either they're going to like it or they're not. Fuck them. I'm going to give them the best 20 minutes of my life. And I'm going to get in my car and go home and smoke a joint like I do every fucking night. You know what?

When I first did the podcast and then about two weeks ago, we started Patreon, which is, okay, you're writing every day. You're giving the show every day. And I just, I don't just turn the mic on and just, you know, I see what people do. People fucking have a newspaper or the terminal, the laptops open and they read a story and they give their spin on it. I won't do that to my people. I don't. I will say, I want to write about this story. How could I put myself with this story?

Who do I know in this angle? And I'll write. And when I do a podcast, each podcast is generally 12 pages on a laptop. That's not easy to do. 12 pages is half a chapter of a book. So in a week to do all my shows, I just don't show up and talking. I could do it. I could fumble and say, but when you hear my podcast, you'll never hear me go,

you know, what do you call? I don't want to do it like that. Because a lot of people know me as the guy on TV that's scripted that says things the way he says things. So I want to satisfy them. I want to tell them a nice story. I want to, you know, I just want to come across like, oh, it's crisp, it's good.

Listen, I want whatever you charge. I want my value for it. It's fine bucks. You're an old school American. You're an old school American. You give a $5. It's a $1. It's a $1.

All school. And that's it's a quarter of month. Yeah. Remember we used to pay for a paper? Yeah. It's a quarter of a month. Right. You go to an airport and got a New York post it.

Oh, I love it. I love it. I never buy it. I steal it. I steal everything. I steal everything. I don't buy nothing in airports. Nothing.

Nothing. Even the airpluffs. Fucking waters. These are from fucking Fort Lauderdale airport. No, Miami. I went to Versailles. I got a couple empanadas and I took these with the fucking, I wouldn't buy all shits. But you know what?

The people listen to my show and the same thing as your audience. They get you pumped. They get your hype. You can't let them down. So now I'm in contact with my audience every day. day with the app and we're talking all day, I can't let them down, you know? And when they tell you, do this, do this, this, you go, whatever's going on in my life, I can't let those, whatever, how many people done, I got to make them happy.

So I love it. Whenever you're feeling lazy, you want to just, no, I got people who want to hear good shit. So I love it. It's the best. It's like getting my column back, Joe. It's like I have my column. No, you do have you. I told you that.

It's the same thing. It's the same thing. Only you control it. No boss now. No, nobody who said you can. You cannot put that in there. I know him. You cannot put that in there.

Can't. This is what's the beauty about today. What's the name of the show? Fame is a bitch right here on this shirt. Fame is a bitch. That's it. Comes out Monday. Well, the free shows of Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.

Patreon, it's every day. You got to go to the Patreon app and get me. But, you know, start free if you want. No, it's all right. Ease into the motherfucker. It's fine. I don't care. I love you, brother.

I love you, too, my man. I love that. I love that. I get to fucking shoot the shit every time. I love it. All right, like I told you in the beginning of the show. Blue Apron is the way to go. They deliver farm fresh ingredients and step-by-step recipes right to your door.

Their mission is to make incredible home cooking accessible to everybody, okay? Blue Apron achieves this by supporting a more sustainable food system, setting the highest standards for the ingredients and building a community of home chefs. Okay, Lee loves it. Lee goes crazy over it. Look at this week's menu. You got cheeseburgers with spicy slaw. Are you nuts or what?

chicken with tangy barbecue sauce. I mean my mouth is watering as we speak. All right. They're quick and easy recipe options. Listen, they're seasonally inspired ingredients, mouthwatering grilling options for the summer. Like I said, chicken with barbecue sauce and juicy cheese burgers with spicy straw. Where are you going to get that at? These are chef design recipes and exciting partnerships like with Bob's burgers and Master Chef. So again, check out this week's menu. Go ahead. Do yourself a favor and you're going to get the first three meals for free. At blue apron.com slash Joey. Again, that's blue apron.com slash Joey. Get your first three meals free. Blue Apron is a better way to cook, believe it or not. And they give you the recipe

and you learn how to cook and now you can impress your friends. All right. So go to Blue Apron. And that's all I got to tell you. All right. Like I told you in the beginning of the show, hiring is a challenge. But there's one place you can go where hiring is simple, fast, and smart. A place where growing businesses connect to qualified candidates. That place is ziprecruiter.com slash church. Again, hiring used to be hard. Multiple job sites, stacks of resumes, a confusing review process. I can't even think about it.

But today, hiring can be easy, and only you have the one place to get it done and that's ziprecruiter.com slash church. You're like, Joey, why? I'll tell you why. because they send your job to over 100 of the web's leading job boards. They just don't stop there. With a powerful matching technology,

ZipRecruiter scans thousands of resumes to find the people with the right experience and invite them to apply for your job. As applications come in, ZipRecruiter analyzes each one and spotlights the top candidates, so you never miss a great match. So ZipRecruiter is so effective that 80% of its employers who post on ZipRecruiter

Get a quality candidate through the site within one day, and time is money. You got a small business, you got a little business, a big business. ZipRecruiter is the way to go. With results like that, it's no wonder. ZipRecruiter is the highest rated hiring site in America. So right now, stop playing games. You're looking for that employee for the holiday season, maybe the kick in 2019. My family, the church family, you get ZipRecruiter for free.

What are you saying, Joey, free at this exclusive. web address. You ready? Grab a pen and write it down. ZipRecruiter.com slash church. It's that easy. ZipRecruiter.com slash church. C-H-U-R-C-H. ZipRecruiter. com slash church. ZipRecruiter. The smartest way to hire.

Don't forget, motherfuckers, Thursday night. Huntsville, Alabama. That motherfucker, those tickets are gone. There was like 300 tickets, so there's like 30 left. So don't fuck around. And then Friday and Saturday, I'll see you cock suckers in Nashville, all right? Don't forget we do this every Monday morning to get you fucking started and pump. Don't take shit from nobody today.

You understand me? Stay black. Have a great fucking day. And I'll see you guys Wednesday morning. Stay black. Love you. Kick that fucking Mulee.