The Church of What's Happening Now: The New Testament - #658 - Joey Diaz and Lee Syatt

Episode Date: February 14, 2019

Joey Diaz talks with Lee about how he dealt with the death of his mother at a young age, and what being empathetic means to him.   This podcast is brought to you by:   ZipRecruiter - post your job to 200+ job sites with a single click for free at www.ziprecruiter.com/church   Onnit.com. Use Promo code CHURCH for a 10% discount at checkout.   Recorded live on 02/13/2019.
  

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It's all early in the fucking morning. Go to honor.com slash church And get 10% off, deliver it right to your motherfucking house. It's Valentine's Day. Kick this meal, Lee. There you go. A beautiful fucking Thursday morning. You're feeling good.

You ain't got a date tonight, but who gives the fuck? It's you, some Chinese food, Netflix, and a bong. You know what I'm saying? And then you bang one out. Here you go. Are you fucking nuts or what? Coming into your life on a Thursday fucking morning. What?

Bam, bam. Bam. Put that's phone on. Fuck these people. Old school for you this morning. It's always old school. Joey, why are you tricking me? It's the church, top suck.

Happy Valentine's Day. Whatever your situation is, you know, you could be down, or you could be excited that your boyfriend's taking you to Benny Honey. Are you taking that little broad out tonight? You're going to give her the Staminia for the first time. You've been working it since after Christmas. Whatever your situation. I've been in both situations where I had horrible Valentine's Day by yourself or the Chinese joint. Make him believe it don't hurt, but it hurts.

Nobody wants to talk to you on Valentine, not even a chubby chick. You know what I'm saying? You got problems. Is it your breath? Is it your head do? But on the other hand, listen, if that meant to be there, they're meant to be there. The worst fucking thanks, happy thanks, whatever the fuck. Valentine's Day.

Valentine's Day I ever had was 1980. You know the year? Oh, yeah, I got it written down. Don't ever go back there. Like 85. Because see, Valentine's Day is five days away from my birthday. Oh, yeah. So it's all connected.

So it either kicks off the birthday week or your mind goes into pizzao and you're depressed on your birthday too because you didn't get a little fucking finger banging on Valentine's Day. You know what I'm saying? You didn't bring enough flowers or whatever the fuck you did. But who gives us a little bit. of shit. I'm just trying to tell you it's not that bad. Eventually you'll

find your Valentine and you'll sail off into the fuck world, the world of love, fuck and love and it all works out to you guys. This week, something really weird happened last week that sometimes years ago when I was trying to get

joint custody of my daughter, they did because my wife wanted to break my balls and I know a legal system to stall. My wife ordered a battery of tests like that you go and talk to a psych and all this shit and take a written examination and they try to fuck with you whatever I went down there you know I wanted to be a dad so I went down there and took the test and they came back that uh I had not that much empathy well at the fucking time you know I had gone to prison I came out I was trying to get

on my feet I fucking worked 80 hours a week hard with your hands guys roofed hustling, getting cars. And here I am, fucking broke, up to debt with credit cards. This chick don't want to give you a kid. You do get mad at the fucking world. I mean, you have every right to be mad, especially when you're all fucked up to boot and the whole thing. And I was really aggravated.

And I, uh, what the fuck we talk about? About the test you took, not having a lot of empathy. And they said I had no fucking empathy. And I remember I was a comic at the time, and I wrote a joke about it. You know, I got a nice. no empathy who gives a fuck but then it was bullshit like I'm like this is a bullshit thing because I really it really bothered me there hasn't been a lot of things that bothered me like

that after test but this one got to me a little bit because how do you who the fuck are you from talking to me you know what I'm going through you have no fucking idea what I was going through at the time the only thing that was keeping me afloat was to fucking stand up that was what was keeping me afloat so I uh this last week I you know I'm trying to do this thing with Fox and the whole thing and I'm meeting with these riders and I looked down and I had two missed calls and that night I went home and this is why I tell people always to pick up the fucking phone always pick up the phone you know I didn't have the phone in my pocket it was in my bag and when I went from my notebook I had the two missed calls and I got in the

car and I had a shoot to pick up mercy and the day went behind me and that night I went on Facebook and one of the kids that called me I posted that his mother died and my fucking heart dropped I mean my heart dropped I know why he called me and I felt fucking really shitty and I put up a post on Facebook and this kid uh there's not a lot of sweet sweethearted kids in this place trust me Lee's one of them that's very very sweethearted and this kid's another and his name is Jerry Roach who's been on the podcast multiple time and he's a dear dear dear friend of mine i gotta tell you some guys all these people you see on comedy central and all these play like listen men that they're their own personalities or whatever

but there's these kids that are here there's certain type of kids that are here they got into the comedy game and their heart is gold and when you if you know anything about life when something shitty happens to them you say to yourself, Jesus, there's people like me walking around that did shitty stuff and why would something like this happen to a kid like this? His mom passed in the middle of the night and her sleep, she just passed. And I called him the next day early and we spoke and I let him vent because it's all about venting at that point. You're in a fucking fog. You don't even know if this is real. You're checking around with people to see if they're still talking to you, you know, this could be a

dream. So I spoke to him. I talked them off the ledge a little bit. And then we spoke that that evening again and his mom was getting buried at a Joe Jackson funeral parlor, Joe Jackson funeral parlor or something. And I saw that in the middle of the night and I picked up the phone, me being the ball buster that I am

because he's Mexican. And I go, he answers the phone like you know, like, hello, Joey. Like, he's half sentimental. And I go, not for nothing, Jerry. I go. Listen, your mom's dead she's gonna wake up in a funeral poll and she's gonna see a picture joe jackson on the wall she's a

mexican woman you gotta get her out he broke down into tears i'm like the last thing a mexican woman wants to be surrounded by the jackson five trust me what i'm telling you and we were fucking dying and that's what you do to somebody whose mother just died because if you're gonna hit him you better hit him hard okay and i woke him up out of a cold sleep that was even worse that's a type of motherfucker i am just to let you know that i know what you're you're going through. And I had that. As soon as my mother died, you know, it takes the people around me. That's who I knew who my friends were because they took that time to make a call to me and break my balls like to say something. I'm like, you motherfucker, those are your friends. I still

remember my mother's. It was Joe Jackson. Why don't Mexican like Joe Jackson? I don't know. I was just saying it was just a joke that maybe his mother was racist. I don't know. You know how Mexicans are, they call them Mayottees or something. So I'm just listening, your mom, you think your mom wants to be surrounded by the Jackson 5? You think the last thing your mom wants to see is a picture of Joe Jackson on the wall?

And we just busted out and we bought, and then we started crying. I started crying for him, you know, and we sent a thing down to Joe Jackson's funeral parlor and, you know, he called me Sunday and we spoke and we tried to get together.

And he came to the store last night. And we spoke, and it was just great. And when somebody bombs, I've been there. I walked down that fucking street, and I knew how, I, would anybody, listen, when anybody posts on Facebook, that they lost anybody, I always try to say something. I don't know them well enough. I know you on Facebook, and I know you follow the church.

And I'll just say, sorry for your loss, and I'll think about you and, you know, and I've had a lot of friends from Facebook that have lost people, and I understand from, from Bob Linguish, the dear friend, to, to, I can't forget his name.

He lost his son on Facebook. Jed Rosenkir, just Rosenkir, fucking great guy, Canadian dude, right? Yeah, yeah. You know, we've been through, this is, and I don't know him, but I've suffered for them.

I get where the fuck their heads. that you know so uh it was just funny that i was you know it's my fucking this will be i was trying to explain to jerry last night at the comedy store as so as i can be but as honest as i can be the same way as i can honestly be with you guys that this next birthday is the 40th birthday i've had without my mother and i can't tell you that i miss those birthdays whether you you If you want me to lie to you and tell you, I, last night at the table,

thinking about meeting Jerry, I'm sitting there, staring at my dinner, my wife was in the kitchen. My daughter was across from me. She's fucking, you know, playing with a Super Bowl. So she doesn't see me go into a haze last night.

I went into a haze for like two minutes, like a mental flashback when you see on television. I actually lived through one last night because I had to meet Jerry. Jerry says he was going to go to dinner. and stop by the store. And I'm like, Jesus Christ, I can't believe I'm turning 56 next week. I'm like, wait a second.

That's the 40th birthday without my mother. And I just sat there for a few minutes, and I felt the sting come up, and I restrained myself a little bit, but still, I was still drawn to emotions, and I still got tears in my eyes. And I still remember that fucking last birthday. Like, if the universe sends you signals,

I should have read them because it was the first birthday that we had celebrated without the bar. And that was her baby. That was her whole fucking life. We always, she always, and don't get me wrong, the parties were grandioso until I was about 10 or 11. And I wanted to cut down on them. I didn't like big parties no more. So we just kept them to like the inner circle at the bar. A couple drunks, a couple bookies would come, some of their kids.

but that was the first birthday I didn't celebrate at the bar so when I woke up that morning the feeling in the house was a little down not on my end at that I already had the day planned out I had already my birthday planned out

for the longest fucking time for my 16th birthday I had a karate competition in Jersey City I was still going to karate over at fucking 27th and 22nd and Central with that dude and I was going on karate tournament. My plan was to take first in the form and take first in fighting,

get the trophies, go home and quit karate, never go back. Like that was it. I was done with karate. I had played freshman basketball and I didn't start. That was Warrington on my soul. I put all this work into something and I thought I was on the start and it was a complete opposite. I barely fucking played my freshman year.

I didn't know where I stood in basketball. And guess what? I didn't want to take a bus to karate no more. You know, I was hanging out with a new crew of kids around my neighborhood. And I made the worst move I haven't made in my life was to quit karate at that age because at least I had a schedule. I always had to answer this. His name was Kevin Norlander.

I hope he's still alive. I heard he's still alive. And I always had an answer to him. He was a tough fucking karate teacher. There was no smile on his face. There was no joking around in class. There was nothing. There was nothing.

This guy had zero emotion. And if you didn't do what he fucking told you, he just fucking kicked you with his little Vietnam orange agent foot. Because he was a Vietnam vet. And he stayed over there and stayed in Karateville and learned karate for two or three years. And he brought it back to the States. So he was using this combo karate tactic of fighting.

We became savages. in the tournament scene. And we were good at high kicks, and we had trick kicks, and he just trained us to be fucking savages. I mean, you had to sweep. You know, if you didn't get certain grades on your report card, he would put you in the corner

and make you do homework and make you do jumping Jackson shit. I mean, this guy was a no-nonsense karate program. Like, there was no fucking belts. You had to go to competitions to get belts. There wasn't no, it wasn't like every 90 days you test. and they charge you $35 and they promote you. No, no, no, no, no. This guy was like Jiu-Jitsu.

He gave you a belt when you thought you were ready. There was no guidelines. So all the other schools around the area, after you were there for a time period, you automatically got a belt and tested, not this guy. To get a stripe, you had to, like, throw somebody to a plate glass window. Like, he was like the dude from karate.

But it wasn't, he had a class of savages. And I had already been with him for four years, five years. I had to take a bus there and walk fucking nine blocks. It was just too much on me at that time. I wanted to be into girls and I wanted to hang out with the fucking guys in my neighborhood. So my plan was to wake up on my birthday morning

and go down to Jersey City, go to this fucking high school, do the karate tournament, get back on the bus, and meet my friend to smoke dope and drink fucking beer. I wake up that morning, my mom makes me breakfast. She apologizes for not And I tell listen, there's no big fucking deal.

I got my day planned. I didn't want to have a party anyway. I fucking hated those things after a while. And now I look back and I wish you would have lived. I would have still had them every fucking year. Because it was my birthday, I knew what it was meant to her. Like, it wasn't even about me. She had such shitty birthdays as a kid that she celebrated the whole week.

I saw Tom Poppet this tall last night. And we were talking about New York City when I was growing up. How every year on my birthday, I went to the Harlem Globe Trots. They're going to be in town. Because every Monday, when I grew up, every year my birthday was on the 19th. So that means that my birthday always fell on Monday, Sunday, or Tuesday for some reason. It was close to that area. You know, it feels different when you're a kid.

So every Monday is present-saying. When we were growing up, you were off Lincoln's birthday on the 12th, and you were off the 19th. These motherfuckers cut it down to one holiday, these fucking scumbags, but then they gave you Martin Luther King, so it all balances out. So, but it used to be two Mondays in a row you were off in the old days. So my mother would start that party the Monday before. She would start her own personal party with the drinking and the fucking snorting. Like it's Coco's birthday this week.

It was like she was more excited than I was. I was excited for the presents and for the party and the food. My mom used to make these little fucking. ham sandwiches called bocalitos oh my god and she cut the fucking they cut the sides off and they make thousands of them in the fucking platter if you look at that picture of me as a kid dancing and you look at the table there's a picture of bocalitos on the fucking table it's like this deviled ham spread with spanish style with olives and shit and they cut the edges off the bread and that's when white bread was different ohly i would eat a thousand of those things but she would only make them on my

birthday. Oh. That was part of the deal. Only on my birthday. So she promised me to make me a couple of bocaditos. And I was, I went, I did something with my friends, and I went and got my gear. And when I came back, two of my mother's buddies were at the house. Arnardo and Umberto. They were brothers,

they were alcoholic brothers, but they were bookies. Great guys. I adored them growing up. And they were just going to have beers at the house and then watch, I don't know something. They were going to watch. something or whatever, and then they were going to go to a track. That was what my mother and Arnardo and that crew did every day. They went to a track. But there was a hitch like fucking 18 inches of snow fell.

So we didn't think there was going to be a karate tournament. They didn't give a fuck. The tournament went on and we had to get down there. So we had to walk up the fucking hills, get on the number one bus with chains on it in those days. The bus is getting up Kennedy Boulevard. Holy shit. It was fucking the day from hell. But before I left, Arnado said, hey, man, I forgot to get you a birthday present.

Now, he was a bookie. He goes, what do you want for your birthday? He goes, I got $10. You want me to put on a number for you? And I go, yeah. And he goes, what number? And I go, 219. Just put it on fucking $219.

And I left the house. So people don't know it's called Bolita. It's a thing in New York and New Jersey where you bet, if you bet $10,000, you win $5,000. If you bet $20, you win $10.000. If you bet $5,500, you win $2,500. If you bet a dollar, you win $500. And you get paid that day. You tip the bookmaker $50, and you fucking take $450, and everybody has a party.

He offered me a $10 bet. I took it. I walked down up the fucking hill with my little Chinese friend, Mario Diaz. He was half Chinese, F-Cubin. A bunch of us little geeks from the neighbor who went to karate. And we got on the number one bus. It took us like, instead of 30 minutes, it took us like an hour and a half to get down. but we got down there.

I won first place in the form, but on the fighting part, now, when I talk to you people about fighting, no, it wasn't cage riding or punching yourself other in the face. You wasn't about that at all. It was semi-contact. So it was from the fucking neck,

down to the waist, and you put shields on. And if you kicked anywhere under where that shield wasn't, you either got disqualified or you got a point taken away from you. And there were three, like two minute fucking rounds.

That's it. It was nothing. It's a good point. You're not trying to knock them out. No, there was no knockouts allowed. There was body kicks and shit. But we were crazy in our school. He was already teaching his fucking spinning back kicks and all this shit.

So I think the kid had me on points in the finals. And I finally did a kick and I kicked him on the shoulder. And I got disqualified because it was like a heel kick. And I wasn't trying to hurt the kid of nothing. And I got the scald. qualify we shook hands afterward he even told me it was a nice kick and then i got in the floor so i got second place in fighting and first place in fucking form and i said that's it i'm quitting fucking karate and i got on the bus with my little fucking savages we rode back now i didn't get high with these

guys these karate guys did not get high they were by the fucking book all they did was do karate and geek out on the weekends we would go to chattentown and buy karate uniforms or go to fucking Honda, there was a big martial art place called Honda. That's all we did. So I get back to my house. There are two trophies. My mom is proud of me. I'm happy.

I put them upstairs. And when I come down, Arnardo, goes, hey, fuck-o. You hit the fucking number today. 219 came out. You'll get your money tomorrow. $5,000. So I had to give my mother 15 off the top. She shook me down.

And I kept 35 and opened up an account. and hence for towards my end of my freshman year that's how I became a drug dealer Can I go back for one second Because it upset me when you said it Why do you tip the bookmaker 50 bucks Because you always tip the bookmaker

No the bookmakers You don't tell He doesn't tip you when you lose You always tip the bookmaker 50 bucks In those days that was the protocol In fact to be honest with you Yeah He had already gotten the tip

For me You know anything about the bookmaking game He really gets 550 from the bank. So he already gets a tip. But in our world, how we do it is if you get that money, you give him a tip as a sign of good luck. So you give him another 10 off.

I guess. I tip the dealer when I'm playing at the casino a little bit, but that freaked me out. That world is completely different. I guess so. That world, look, when I lived in North Bergen, and I was doing all the bad, should I tell you people, the reason why my friends didn't turn on me

because every time I did something I paid them, I made them accomplices. Even if they had nothing to do with it? Nothing to do with it. There's nothing wrong with giving your friend a $100 bill and make his day. That's true. So if I went and robbed a Coke dealer for $4,000 and I got, let's say, $3,800 in cash, and I got an ounce of Coke,

I would give two or three of my buddies $300 cash that I knew they needed for their mom, whatever, and they go, thank you. And then two days later, they find out I robbed somebody. What are they going to do? Fucking Coco. They're going to do? They're going to wrap me out? They can't wrap me out.

I just took care of them. Smart. And you take that cocaine and you give that around to a couple people. My mom wanted me to, when I got my first job, she made me give her my first paycheck. What did your mom take the $1,500 for? Did she save it for you? It was off the top. It's like, I paid for a lot of parties.

It's just a fucking shakedown. that you have to accept. Okay. And I accepted it. There was no arguing with it. I knew my mom was hurting for money at the time. I knew she needed. She didn't have the boss to tell me she needed it.

But I knew, and I just kicked it up. I was a little pissed for two minutes. I'm not going to lie to you. I'm not going to tell you, I just kicked it up. It took me half a day to process it. Fuck you, mom. That's a lot of money when you're that young. When I was in the fucking freshman year, they got $3,500.

And I hope I took $500 off the top. I put $3,000 in the bank. and I opened up a HUD account. Like at the bank, it was called Hub, Hudson County United Bank. Yeah, Hudson something hub, but yeah, Hudson United Bank. And I put $3,000 in there, and I kept a nickel and got some nicer clothes. I got like a new basketball, stupid shit like that. And then I found out that I was paying $3, $4 for Air to Acid.

So I said, wait a second, I had these friends. First I had the Spanish dude that his father was a doctor. And he was telling me that you're paying four and paying three for them. Get them from me. So I started giving him the $3. And I would just, and I would see that. Wait a second. Fucking $3.

What is it called? I didn't know. I didn't know anything about it. But it was just natural to me. I had already, there was a kid in my neighborhood that would give you a quarter pound of pot for $100. Okay. That's four ounces. Is it a lot or a little?

That's four ounces? That's a little. Okay. But he would give you four ounces. I did the math. I'm not fucking stupid. So my freshman year, I'm sitting there. Now, I had grown up around drug dealers.

I knew the game. I knew it. I said, wait a second. If I could buy, his name was Joe. When I was growing up, this guy's too, I can't say his last name because he became a cop. But he was a dear friend of mine. I loved him dearly. He's the first guy.

ever turned me on to Led Zeppelin. He gave me the eight track to the song remains the same, and I nearly jumped out of a fucking window. But hence, that's a different story. So he would give me four ounces for $100. And I would sell an ounce for $50. Wow.

So I was doubling my money. You couldn't beat that. All this time, I'd been working for $6 an hour and all this shit. And wait a second, if I sell... At that time, it would sell itself, like a nice ounce for 50 bucks, and I would give them extra, so I would take my ounce would be a little less, or my count would be a little less. I would sell it all, and double my money.

It was fucking like, man, why not? I kept doubling my money, doubling my money, double my money, double my money. I couldn't see, I never lost. There was never, I never got stuck. Yeah, you get stuck with a few extra stems in those days. And you have to count that as weight. So once you took those things out, it really made, instead of having 28 grams in an ounce, now you got one ounce that was maybe 24 grams.

So I took a beat right off the top. But if I sold those at 50 bucks and gave them a little extra and whatever, I would still make $70, $80. It wasn't a bad fucking profit for something. You could do once a day. That's $400 a fucking week if you do it five times in a fucking week. Yeah. So they turned me on.

And you could have done it more. Yeah, and I was doing this without a car. This was just to the kids I was going to school around. Hey, I got new weed. Boom, let's do it. And I would just always make money like that. I started making money like that. And then finally, a friend of mine told me that he could cop in bulk.

And now at this time, I'm doing acid. I'm 16, and I'm doing a little micro-bidot hits of acid once a week and shit. I'm trying to keep it under the borderline. I was also doing angel dust. I was doing T.HC. Crystal. So I would do that. I always was fucking out of my mind. So I'm 16, and I'm doing angel dust on Sundays.

I would just do it on Sundays. It was called Crystal T.H.C. That was the trick, but there was elements of angel dust in there. So I would do that. On Sunday, it was a big track day for my mother. She would hit like two of the tracks. So I know she was going to be gone from like 10 to 6. So I could get high at fucking 11.

And at 6 o'clock, at least I'd be a little normal when she got home. I could at least talk to her. So I had to time my highs around my mother being out. Because that last year, she wasn't really working. She just had the bar. But during the week at night, oh, yeah, I would drop a little hit of ass during the week one night and go to friends' house and listen to music or walk. We'd be like David Robinson.

We'd walk from here to fucking turkey and back every minute, through cemeteries, we just see shit and see streaks and shit like that. Then I teamed up with this dude named Nick, and he told me about these guys in East Trousburg, Pennsylvania. And they were like albino types. Like they were fucking, I mean, it was a whole different world for me. Sometimes I think I missed out. Sometimes, like, maybe I'm lucky.

I didn't, what are you finding albino types in the middle of Pennsylvania? there was oh my god like i wish you would have seen what their apartment looked and smelled like a lot like this place i imagine no no no this place is a fun this place smells great this place is a lot of weed no they didn't they didn't even had weed this place smelled like chemicals like any time every time i was in them like when is this place going to blow up and they'd be in there smoking cigarettes and shit i'm like oh god i didn't know nothing about nothing but i knew just from basic chemistry, from lighting myself on fire.

You never had a chemistry set when you were a kid. I never lit myself on fire. I had about two or three chemistry sets and I would put them together and I create shit. I don't even know what I was creating. Every time we talk, it explains more and more. You probably have a chemical reaction.

What do you mean you say? I loved all that shit when I was a kid. I was an only child. And I would go to that fucking grammar school, and I was surrounded with kids for four days. When I got out of there, I would go home and sit in my attic, and I just wanted to be more myself. And I was a little ahead of the fucking sphere. And I got, you know, when you got comic books in those days, they always talked about chemistry sets. And I figured, let me get myself a chemistry set.

So I saved my pennies up, and I got myself a little chemistry set. You know, they got, like, simple shit in there, like, sulfur. Yeah, they had baking soders. But then I would get like the expanded ones. Where? Like they had like bigger ones that had more shells and shit. And they would tell you, don't combine this with this. That's the first thing I do.

I remember I would do all my experiments in the attic. I had an attic and I would do all my experiments in there. Oh my God. I had this purple syrup that I made one time in a test tube. I just kept throwing shit in there. And I remember putting it on the car. carpet and the fucking carpet started like eating away.

I did so much damage with that chemistry. I used to drink shit. I didn't even know what the fuck I was drinking half the time. I mean, I was a retarded kid. You need to just play the lottery every day. You're the luckiest person alive. How are you alive? I don't know. I was making shit. So I was interested in it until I found that.

That you had to go to pharmacy school and all that. I'm like, I'm not going through that. I just want to learn shit to make shit blow up and light fires. I was the king of the chemistry set for a long time. Then I just quit. I just fucking said, this is too much for me. I'm going to get too absolving this shit involved.

So I quit the chemistry set game. But when I started meeting these dudes, I was aware that you couldn't fucking smoke in there and you couldn't do simple things. And you'd go in there and they had all those, they had one bedroom. They all slept like in the living room. And both of their bedrooms.

Like they were college kids. And both of their bedrooms. were empty. It was just manufacturing. And they had like an air condition in there and fans. And one room had like paper where they would

do the blotter acid. I mean it was like an operate. It was a mom-pop occupation. And I think about it now. At that time, I don't really, because my buddy Nick would take money from people and he'd go buy

it and get himself a cheaper price. I don't know what he was buying. I would buy my own stuff. I was giving them in those days $900, $800 a week. And I know Nick was giving them $9,800 a week. I can't imagine how many people were driving in to buy stuff from them

because our day was Saturday. And they ran it like a fucking by appointment. Like you had a half hour in there and you had to get out of there because they didn't want the neighbors to see the cars. They were professional. He's two young guys. So wait, do you're spending $1,000 a week almost?

I would go up there and spend, I would buy 500 black beauties. Black beauties with speed in a black capsule, and wrestlers ate them to make weight because they were diet pills. You can't eat if you're speeding. Oh. So they would call Black Beauties, and I would sell those. I would get those for $35 for $1,000 for $1,000. And I would sell them for a dollar apiece.

Jesus. Or 35 for 100. So I would go back and I'd have five wrestlers give me 30. Right off the bat, I'd make a profit. And then I'd have 500 left to sell them $1 bills. If you bought 20, I gave you 25. You know what I'm saying? But after that, it was all profit.

Yeah. I didn't really matter what. It didn't really matter what I made off you. It was all profit. Who do I give a fuck? Yeah. once you mean 35 bucks back yeah what do I give a fuck it was a very unique business but to start the business I had to take a thousand dollars out of my the bank account okay and I pretty much

never touched that bank account it was just everything rotated out of my house after that I think I made a few deposits of $200 I think when my mom died I probably had like $1,800 in there I never touched that money I sustained without really a job from a April to November that year. And I would do it in such a slow, like a lot of people, my neighbor would sold acid. Every neighborhood had a different acid of drug representative. My neighborhood had one, but we had different clientele.

He wasn't in high school. Okay. You could go to his house if you were in high school. I was at the school. So as soon as I walked into the school, I have 20 kids waiting for me that were going to play hooky. So you would buy a little bit of acid, or mostly acid, and some black beauties? I would buy, I did just, I just devoured an acid and black beauties.

Okay. But all different types of acid. Every week they would make a new acid. Every week they would make four-way acid, blotter acid. They would make acid that, you know, it was like what they do with marijuana now. Strings? You know, I like one. Yeah.

Like they would make certain strains that were sellable. something that would happen typhoon or you know so they would all have gimmicks they were very smart about it they had like this acid that it was called four way acid you could buy it and four people

could do it but no we ate the whole thing oh my god and how much would you turn that 800 bucks into well the masculine acid the microdot was $90 for a hundred hits So it cost me 90 cents and I would sell them for $3. So I would make a $2 and $10 profit on each one.

I would pick up a thousand of those a week and probably sell 200 sub guys that weren't going to go in competition with me. Like let's say somebody lived in the Kennedy School District. I would sell them 100. And let's say somebody lived on 64th Street Field. I would give them 100. 43rd Street, 46th Street, 38th Street Park.

I was a substation. You were never scared about the cops finding out behind this? No, because even if they found out, I had it out. How did you want out? I had a carmine Balzano. Oh, okay. I always had it out. There was always, and I was doing it in such a small level

that nobody would have known, i.e., thank God, and that nobody ever died. I didn't have anybody who was careless. You know, those hits of micro, not thinking back on them, they were harmless. They were a lot stronger than the acid you and I have done here. You have done, you and I have done acid maybe three times. And all three times, we've done it in a micro level.

That's micro? Yeah. Oh, my God. And for me, it's been like a three-hour. I've never gone into the other side like I used to when I was a kid. What's the other side feeling? The other side is like you're just on another side. I feel like I was there.

It's an out of body experience. Maybe not. We walk. We stop. You trip more. We walk. We stop by your house. You tell me you're freaking out kind that we smoke some more pot.

We calm you down. And then we'd walk. We'd walk. We'd walk. And then you'd feel yourself. coming down, you start yawning, but they were all lies. Those are all signals your body tells you to think that it's done. And it keeps going.

It keeps going. You don't know how many times I went in because I'm coming down, and next thing you know, I'm sitting in bed and I'm seeing fucking the posters spinning around. My stomach is feeling nauseous just thinking about it. Trust me, when you're doing it and you're having fun, there's no more fun. Oh, no, it's here. I could, you know, I tell jokes on stage that my daughter's not going to have the fun I had growing up.

I'm very appreciative of what happened in my situation a lot of times. Yeah, I lost a mother, but I got a gift out of people that now I know how to give back, and that's that gift of, you know, how to handle somebody. Like the kid that I had in here a couple weeks ago, we came back. in here, his daughter hangs out with my daughter. And he's a great guy and his wife's a great lady. And I brought him back here. We listened to Harold Smith. I was telling you guys the other day. The reason why I took him back here was because his mom and died, his mom and dad had died in a matter of two months. And he was going through some heavy stuff. And when you go through that,

it makes everything else seem heavier. And it's so weird that I lost my mom at 16. and I see people who lost their jobs, who lost their moms now, and I still get fucking emotional when they tell me that they lost their mom. It still bothers me to an extent that Jesus Christ had happened to me so long ago, and I still feel so much pain. How can you not? And I can't imagine to go over again what I went through, those first three years.

I wouldn't wish that on anybody. And I can't... And it takes its toll at every age. Don't get me wrong. It hurts at every age. Losing the mother hurts at every age. There's people who talk about losing a... Listen, losing a fucking father at any age hurts.

I shouldn't just focus on the mothers. Losing friends. Losing anybody. Losing a friend. You know, it affected me. Ralphie Mae's death has affected me till this day, guys. Like when I was a kid, Anthony Balzano's death affected me, and then my mother's death affected me, my father's death affected me,

my Dominic Special's death affected me for a while. That destroyed me at that age. And then I lived a few years, and you meet more people, you lose along the way. And then, you know, I lost Maryland. That was devastating. That was 11 years ago. And then Ralphie made me make a change.

when somebody's death makes you get up and go oh I fucking get this now that's an every death I've done that I've learned from somebody's death when Richard Jenny shot himself God rest his soul when Mitch Hedberg died

God rest his soul they were all different circumstances but a part of me felt something I had to change something on some situations I didn't you know with maryland and made me take a colonoscopy more often and make that think make them put a finger up my ass more often from time to time but with you know with ralphi's death i gotta tell you something and the church family sees this when we put that video up in december lee and i learned something from ralphi that he's still alive i mean you guys downloaded 300,000 times and that's better than a regular fucking guest and you guys all responded to it so if you imagine

if you guys responded to it in that type of manner how it affected me I think about Ralphie when I set my schedule up now you know a lot of people lately have been hit me up going hey man you haven't been doing the fucking the morning joints no more you know why you know why I was yesterday I was at a fucking field trip I was at a field trip with kids

you know it's I'm not it's coming to a place now that life is unwinding and I can't do the crazy shit I was doing anymore plus whenever Lee's not here the periscope don't work so I said there's times I come here two times they've come here so far to do the fucking periscope and it won't work unless you're here I guarantee you now it works now we can do it

but no it's It's not that I forgot about you guys in any way, shape, or form. It's that life has really gotten into the way. If I don't go, there's days I got to meet with the fucking riders at fucking 10 o'clock. I don't know what the fuck I'm doing. I have no idea what I'm doing. I'm not a fucking, you guys think I'm a fucking writer. You've heard my material.

It's fucking stupid stories and shit like that. No, I got to go fucking right. I don't know what I'm fucking doing. See? The periscope isn't working in here no more. Maybe it's a periscope thing. We'll have to test. with Instagram or another thing.

So it's not that I don't love you guys by no means. It's that life has really gotten into the way the last couple fucking months. It's real. But you have a, I think what you're saying is, is, like, older Joey Diaz, like, you have a choice. You could still do the morning

joint and be like, I don't want to go on this field trip, but because of the way Ralphie's death affected you, you're making different choices. Absolutely. Absolutely. I'm making different choices of how I eat. I'm making different choices of how to take care of myself.

Last night we were at the comedy store, and I was speaking to a comic, and he goes, you know, I'm just happy to be home, the road and this and that. And he goes, I got to take a break. And I go, you know, man, that club's going to be there next year. And it was like I said something that the Lord would have said. He looked at me like,

fucking like I had said something because I never thought about it that way. He goes, but then these agents call you and they said that the order, they can make offers all they want. They can make all the offers all they want. The club's going to be there next year. I want to go there and give you the best possible fucking show I could give you.

I don't want to go to a fucking city and chuck and jive. When you don't see Rogan touring, it'll tell you. It's because he don't have the fucking, he don't want to cover the spread. He doesn't have the material to cover the spread. sometimes it's the same thing with us. We want to be the best we can be when I go out there.

When I go out there, I want to give you the best before. That's why Clinton Cronin hit me up this morning, a great guy up in San Jose, you know, would you do the podcast? When I go on the road, it's the fucking right and do comedy. That's all I want to focus on. I'm going to do a couple workouts. I'm going to go to original Joe's and eat with the Agostino. But besides that, I have already seen.

San Jose 80 fucking times. I don't want to see nothing. I just want to focus on you guys. I'm getting older. You know, I go to the store on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays when I'm in town. Listen, if you know anything about the comedy store, the electricity, the magic,

you want to be down there every night. I can't cover the fucking spread. Like I told you guys a week ago, ever since I watched that Rogan podcast with the sleep guy, I've been logging down my sleep. I do everything. I try to, because I understand how important it is. 20 years ago, it wasn't important to me.

And look what the result was. Look at me in the longest yard. It looked like my head's about to fucking explode. I'm trying to live here for this little girl. And I'm trying to be the best dad I could beat her right now. And mixing it in with comedy, podcasting, writing a book. Jesus fucking Christ. But anyway, back to the original subject.

Empity is, uh, My heart goes out to Jerry Rocha and the road he has to deal with. But my heart's gone out to a lot of my friends the last couple of years. A lot of my friends have lost people. And listen, man, the good thing about, I think the good thing about the way we do our Facebook and our Twitter and you guys have noticed it, if you guys are fucking, listen, there's a thing called the DM and there's a way to be a gentleman. you're thinking about something you don't want to fucking

talk to somebody about it somebody die or something listen we live we're across the street from afino parlor i know all about that the reactions to it you guys know when i went through with dimmy

and harry two months ago with the two cats going within a month I know how to grieve it you know I told you I'm writing this book there's a chapter I have to do about the kidnapping I could not do the kidnapping without not letting you know

the evolutions of drugs in my life and what they did. You know, yesterday, I was eating dinner and they said that they gave old chop all life. I was just watching the news, listening to the news on the side. And I'm thinking to myself, you know what?

He deserves more than a fucking life. And even though I did Coke for 2,000 years and I was the main contributor to it, these guys were in on shipping poison into America. I got three friends I grew up with now that I have fucking cocked in their 50s because of what we went through

in our fucking 80s with these drugs. They deserve to get what they get. But anyway, we made our own choices. I'm not blaming O Chapo or his cousin or anybody else for doing the mistakes I did. The point being is that we did what the fuck we did. And now we got to deal with it.

Now we get older. And I can't not to maintain that comes to my mind. I wanted to do a single podcast. with you guys let you know I can't believe I'm turning 56 I cannot believe I'm turning 56 all those years are walking around and writing shit down and you know having these semi-dreams about things I never once I called my friend Didi the other day and I said Dini all those years you and I walked around together and talked at the age of 16

15, did we ever talk about your 50s? Nobody ever talks about their 50s. Nobody ever says, well, when I'm fucking 50, because we don't fucking think about it. I never thought I would make it to fucking 50. I'm sitting there going Tuesday, I'm going to be 50 fucking six years old. How fucking fast did this go?

Last birthday I remember is, you know, Coming home, my mom telling me I hit the number, and that's how fast it went. That's how fat. Nine months later, she was fucking gone. Gone. That was my last birthday. Then my 17th birthday, I celebrated in the attic. I broke into my mother's house with 18 guerrillas, and we had the party of the year up in that attic.

Everybody puked. Like six people were puking at once. The fucking house was a mess. Sounds great. My father locked up the house after that. put an alarm in there we could not get in it was fucking horrible i'm just saying just for the record man that uh you know like i said if you're going through something and i mean you know don't fucking hit me that you want to be on the fucking podcast if somebody dies a cat a dog a dad

dm me let's talk about it let's talk how to put it in perspective before it needs a way on you you know what was one of the biggest skeletons in my class you know what was one of the biggest skeletons in my not dealing with my mother's death. I swear to you guys. I swear to you guys. My mom died in 79 and I didn't deal with it till 85. I threw everything I could of dealing with it to push it as far away from me as I could. I threw rocks on it. I did heroin. I did coke. I drank. I did pills. I did everything I could not to deal with her debt and it backfired on me. In 1984, I ended up homeless, fucking, you know, grind it, grinded mentally. Why?

Because I didn't deal with it. Listen, I don't say this a thousand times. I do not believe in you giving somebody a deuce a week to talk to somebody about this stuff. This is stuff that you talk to with your friend. We all have a friend who has a parent that passed away. Give them a call. How do they deal with it? Everybody deals it a little fucking differently.

You know, I noticed a friend of mine always tells me his dad taught him how to box. And sometimes this guy goes in and out because he still mourns his dad. His dad's been gone for about a year and a half. Great guy. Lee knows him. Great guy. Your dad was hitting the bag of his joint, and I saw him standing. I go, hey, man, do me a favor.

Teach me some of the stuff your dad taught me. And he looked at me like a ghost hit him. And I did that for a reason because I know he's dealing with it. And we got to the fight position me and him Saturday, and I was throwing fake jabs in him, and he was hitting my gloves, and he was showing me all this shit.

His dad taught him when he was growing up. His dad was a real boxer, and he was teaching me how you jab, jab, jab, and you hit him with a hook, and they don't see you coming, and he taught me a counter off the right fucking cross, and as I was looking at him, he was telling me all this with a smile on his face.

And I gave him a hug, Oh, your dad taught you some good stuff. He looked at me kind of like, you fucking played me, Cox. It's not that. It said, I know what people are dealing with when they lose a loved one. You know, my friend Timmy, I can feel it when I talked to him on the phone. He lost his mom and his dad. You know, his life has been a run.

This is what happens. You lose your compass. Don't let it get to you. If you lose somebody, don't let it get to you. just lose your compass, sit down, call your friends that have gone to a similar situation, and those people are going to be your anchor. Trust me, those people are going to keep you fucking together. It's not some psychiatrist, it's not some fucking pills.

Listen, you might, we all need to self-medicate. Don't ever get me wrong. You know, I love the gift of grief because grief. Grief, grieving, I'm sorry. Grieving after you lose somebody happens just like this. You wake up in the morning, you think about that person for a second or two, and then the day overtakes your mind of what things you have to do that day. And then you do all those things, you go to all these parties, you go to all these events,

you go to see with your friends, you get in your car at the end of the night, or your Uber, your head home and that pain creeps up on you. It doesn't show up until maybe a half hour before you're going to go to bed. And that's when you got to deal with that pain. Because when people are around you, that pain goes away. You forget all about that pain. It's not that you get home at night that you really got to confront that demon. That's why for years, I would go home to party.

I would go home and I would go fuck confronting that demon because it doesn't hit you in the daytime. When you're active, that's why I tell people, right after somebody passes, you got about a week to put it into perspective. And then it'll even take over you or you have to take over it. So the best thing is to stay busy and surround yourself with people. People constantly in and out. And do this. Wear yourself in. At night, you're going to have to answer to the pipe.

And that's where all the problems fall on your shoulders. That's why most people go home and what do they do? They smoke or drink. They have a drink. Because this is when the demons catch up to you. And they fucking knock you on the shoulder and go, hey, we didn't go away. What I would do is numb it. I would fucking get high, put on Black Sabbath, and pass out crying.

Where I should have got up, I was too young, and wrote about it. What I'm feeling. I mean, I'm the fucking kid that after my mother died, two years later, I would still go to the house to see if they made a mistake. You know, so please, if you're grieving. there's a process and I basically did this show for Jerry Rocha because he's traveling

and he says he's going to download it you know and there's a process to grieving and 40 years later I can tell you it still hurts it doesn't hurt as much but it still fucking plays with my legs from time to time like it still hits you in the stomach and you know somebody's gone

and that's it and that's it and that's that man it's motherfucking Valentine's Day baby and this was just a solo podcast today just to keep you motherfuckers alive and let you know I didn't forget about you even though things are happening that busy we got a church family member that's down top quality Tony I heard some prayers go out to him you know he's uh he came to a bunch of Vegas shows and uh I know they're talking to Michael Klein and they've been going back and forth we retrieved a picture of him if you want to do me a favor and send them your your thoughts and

your prayers I'm in fucking San Jose and there's not much I can't could do up here but do fucking six shows I want to thank you for selling out all six shows the church family coming in fucking strong I got new material I got old mid tag I'm just planning and smoking dope and having a good fucking time no edibles I'm back off the edible training but I got to be honest here I got a box of CBD edibles in the fucking mail two days ago and I finally looked at them yesterday I'm gonna tell you more about these fucking things they were tremendous I heard I can't wait to drive I had a puppy I popped a couple fucking cubes last night

before I went to sleep. I got up one time to pee at three and the other time was 7.48 when my daughter was shaking me going, Dad, I'm leaving. And I got up, gave Rick Kiss, told her to let nobody fuck with you today. And I'll see you 4 o'clock

before fucking karate and shit. And I got up like nothing. I went and got coffee. Usually my everything hurts. I feel like I got hit by a train, so I'm going to keep you aware of this. That good fucking company. I like my CBD's dog.

I rub them on my knees. If I take a shower, as soon as I get out of the shower, I rub CBD oil, this super strength shit they got up here on my knees, my shoulders, I rub it on my hands. I work the Chinese balls, which a lot of women should be working. I teach you y'all to juggle balls. I had a guy in New York that gave me a box in the Chinese box, and it has those two balls in it, the Chinese handballs. And when you spin them, it plays Chinese songs for you.

It's tremendous for the fingers. It's a very interesting morning, Joey. You got to make the best of your day Got one foot in the grave on a banana peel You know what I'm saying? I appreciate every fucking day Because I don't fucking know I don't fucking know

No you're right And I don't want to harp on it too much Because I think you're right And something that I've definitely learned from you Is to be better with your friends But I'm someone who has trouble Even like I don't even think I have too many close friends Like I've always been someone

I have like a couple but not a bunch But sometimes I have trouble opening up, I've enjoyed going and talking to somebody. So if I just know there's some people out there listening who might be like, I don't have anyone to call. Like they might feel like that. So and you are right, it would be better to hit your eye up or any of that. But I think therapy has a place.

Because some people don't have it as, as much as I have people in my life. There's sometimes like, you know, you don't want to say things to some people. Well, a lot of times you don't even think of those things when you're talking to Sometimes a psychiatrist has a way of getting it out of you. Oh yeah. It's also helpful. A lot of people that have a hard time spilling their guts of psychiatrists, they're professionals. They know how to get it out of you in a certain way.

You know, I'm not saying, what I'm saying works for everybody. What I'm saying was at the time when I was suffering through what I was going through, first of all, I didn't know psychiatry was really available to me. And if it was available to me, I'm paying you what? Cocaine could do a better job. better job so I wouldn't have listened. That was, from time to time, I tell myself it's time to go start talking to somebody. I just don't have the balls and when I do go through something that's that deep, I got four guys I call.

And I get their opinions, some stuff I can ask my wife about, some stuff I know she's going to go into a tirade about. But you know what? I ask my friends a lot of shit. No, if you have that with your friends, it's just saying it. helps I have four different voices five or six different voices and if I don't know the fucking answer to the questions I ask questions I'm not too embarrassed to ask a question I don't know everything so I want to know everything there's times I got a question for Rogan there's things that Rogan don't understand there's times I got a

question for my friend James there's times I asked Timmy there's times I talked I talked a lot to George because me and George had said similar lifestyles, probably talk a lot to George. You know, there's times I tell you who else is good. Felicia. I'll call Felicia. Felicia's really good on attack mode sometimes. Then you'll go, Jesus Christ, you know, Felicia did this, but she had enough.

So I have that community of people. Ari. Ari is great. Ari is level-headed, and guess what? We work off each other. I talk to Ari a lot about where he's slipping, what age he's at, How fast this goes. This goes fast.

This goes fast than what you anticipate. Two weeks ago, it was Christmas. Two weeks ago, it was Christmas. I don't know how you guys feel, but in my world, it was Christmas two fucking weeks ago. So, you know, I'm fucking still confused. We're going on Valentine's Day. It was just fucking Christmas two weeks ago.

And I ain't getting no fucking younger. Neither are you fucking guys. So listen. Yeah. Talk to somebody if you're feeling down. I just wanted to do this podcast to let people know, man, that we all going through shit. You know, we all go through shit.

And you have avenues. I said, no, there's a lot of people. Red Band was going to come on this week. They talk about the amount of people around us that are basically losing their minds. You're watching it. You're seeing it on social media. People that you were friends with,

whether it's political motivations, whether it's, you know, you're watching, I just found out about this Alex Jones thing. It's unbelievable. And it's scary. It scares you in a way that people lose their minds. I hope you people see that we have gotten better. We're trying not to lose our minds.

We've cut down on the edibles. We've cut down on a lot of things. We've taken care of ourselves. I got to applaud Lee. He has been going to that little fitness thing on Tuesday and Thursdays. It's a start. It starts somewhere. Little commitments.

become big commitments. And I got to applaud you for that lately. You have been showing up even when he was out of town. You haven't been coming up with excuses lately. You haven't been making up false appointments at 1 o'clock that you have to take when you know that you've got all day to take them. And you've been going and you've been working through it. And I applaud you.

Thank you. Because that's what it's all about. I think Lee has a misconception of some time that you do something for three months. And that's it. No, it's every week. It's hard. is it's every week it's the same fucking record life gets boring but if it's working why fucking fix it life gets boring you're gonna have to do a thousand

things over and over and over and over and over and over just to get to where you need to be that's what it is people work out four times a week and people don't have the luxury that I have that I could get up in the morning and stroll into a gym and nine there are people that take my fucking hearts out there that they work a fucking eight hour day and then they go to a fucking gym my heart goes out to you I give you all the utmost respect I go to a gym at seven o'clock I don't even know what to start they're talking about throw a left I'm throwing rights I'm throwing knees I'm I don't know nothing by seven o'clock I'm fried all I'm good for is fucking comedy or even being at the gym at six in the morning

just to be in the gym at six the morning those guys that go at six and that Joey Arvarrato he puts up a fucking video every Monday Wednesday and Friday And I see nine people at 5.30 in the morning doing burpees and swings, kettlebell swings. You think I goof on those people? I fucking put something on that thing every fucking day. Every day. I couldn't imagine doing it. I could go to box at 8 o'clock.

I could catch a 9 a.m. movie tie class. But anything else, as the day progresses, you're going to catch a shitty fucking Joey Dia. Is it just the way it is? It's the law diminishing returns. I'm 56. I'm a lot better in the morning than I am at fucking night. By nighttime, I'm cooked. My mind is fucking cooked.

So I don't know how to fuck you feel. It's Valentine's Day, bitches. Go out there, have a good fucking day today. Send somebody your heart. Send somebody your love. Just tell them you love. Maybe they're going through something. They're single.

Call them up. Say, hey, happy Valentine's Day. I'm going to shoot an arrow in your fucking asshole. Whatever the fuck you need to say to them. That's what we're all about. Listen, it was a great fucking week. I hope you have a great week. Next week we're getting down.

I'm sorry about Sunday's podcast with Steve Simone. A lot of people want to hear what Steve Simone have to say, we'll get them back on here. We just had an accident that would never happen again. Trust me, it'll never happen again. Three months. I don't, shut the fuck up. I don't ever want to be in that position again how fucked up I was on Sunday night.

Don't forget, thank you again for selling out the improv this weekend in San Jose. And next week we're coming in heavy into fucking Vegas. Friday, me and Kate Quigley at Treasure Island And then Saturday at the Fox Theater And motherfucking Tucson We're coming in heavy Heavy, I don't give a fuck about the state fair In Tucson or the rodeo

Give you tickets back, bitch Uncle Joey's coming to town And it's only Arizona appearance this fucking year I gotta save on the fucking weeks I burnt myself out last year I hope you understand Second of all, I want to thank our sponsors as usual For keeping this ship a fucking sale

Not to mention you savage motherfuckers. But anyway, talking about jobs. Listen to me. You know how hard it is to hire the right people, to find the right qualified candidates? It takes a long time. You got to go through applications. You got to go through applicants and background checks.

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And right now, the church's family can get ZipRecruiter for free. Our listeners for free at ZipRecruiter.com slash church. Again, that's ziprecruiter.com Church. Like I said, hiring is a challenge, but there's one place you could go to make it simple. The place is zipRecruiter.com slash church. C-H-U-R-C-H and you're going to let you try it for free on Uncle Joey, all right? Number two, I want to thank our main, listen, since day one on, it's been there for me.

You know what? I live off their supplements. Whether it's some Mexican chocolate protein powder, they got those new boxes with the one the day vitamins in them. I went through them already. I got to get another order. I just been lazy. I'm very content with just getting the alpha brain from them and the shroom tech sport and immune to keep me alive in the gym. If I was you, I'd give them all a try. Go to honor dot com right now. Right now, look at their tremendous supplements. I can't do nothing for you with the weighted vest and I can't do nothing for you with the other thing. But as far as supplements, I got you motherfuckers, 10% off

delivered right to your door. What do I recommend number one alpha brain? Number two, shroom tech sports, shroom tech immune. They got the MCT oil. They got so many, they got the beef jerky, the elk jerky, you know, they got the fucking coconut nubs, protein bar. Listen,

go to honor.com right now. Look at that great line of supplements. When you find something you want, go to the box and press in. Church, bam, and get 10 motherfucking percent off your honor. Listen, I love you guys.

Have a happy Valentine's Day whether you're single. You know, you're not lonely. You got your Uncle Joey. Whether you're single, whether you're together, have a happy Valentine's Day, love the one year with.

And that's it, Doc Suckers. Have a great weekend. I'll see you back here on fucking President's Day. Kick this fucking meal. Lee.