The Church of What's Happening Now: The New Testament - #703 - Jordan Belfort

Episode Date: July 22, 2019

Jordan Belfort, a salesman, motivational speaker, and author of two books including "The Wolf of Wall Street," which was adapted into a movie by Martin Scorsese and Leonardo DiCaprio, joins Joey Diaz and Lee Syatt LIVE in studio. This podcast is brought to you by: DollarShaveClub.com -  get your ultimate starter set for only $5 with free shipping at dollarshaveclub.com/church   ForHims- Go to ForHims.com/church to get your first month for just $5 while supplies last. 

What's that guy that killed the fucking people? Jim Jones. This Jones made these. He goes, be careful with him. And my buddy ate two of them and went to see the B-52s. And he kept dropping glasses because your motor skills. Oh, my God, yeah. Oh, my God.

People forget that. And all of a sudden, I'll never forget yelling at the bartender. Like, how many fucking glasses are you going to give this fucking moron until he puts you out of business? I go, give him a plastic cup. And he goes, I'm out of him. He goes, look at everybody. Everybody was on ludes. So that, when they were ludes in the room and it kicked in, every 15 minutes, you hear,

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kick this motherfucker meal. It's Monday The 22nd of July Jordan Belfort The Christ Killer and Uncle Joey Diaz It's a beautiful day to be alive

Oh shit You steal my motherfucking sunshine Jordan Belfort Great to have you on the show Thank you very much for taking the time Out of your busy schedule I know you're doing the talks and the whole thing. I have a lot of interesting people that come through here.

You're a very interesting cat. The beauty of it is that you and I come from the same cut of Savager. You said something when we were talking. You said that we were talking about going to prison. And you said the main thing I wanted to hear, you said, I always knew I can make money. Let me ask you a personal question. Did you have a paper out as a child?

Of course. Again, America. You think I'm fucking lying to you motherfuckers. To learn how to... If you didn't have a paper route, shoot yourself in the fucking head. Of course. That was part of my stories. I was my first thing was going out, door to door, knocking on doors to deliver papers.

I was eight years old, absolutely. And how long did you deliver paper? So what happened was I did it for two years. My mom was so obsessed with growing this paper out. My mom made me sell it to someone else. So I had to sell it to the upstairs neighbor. If I made my first profit, $75. I thought it was the richest kid in town, right?

It was retired at the age of 10. But didn't last long. It was 11. I started shoveling driveways at the snow. Remember, you used to fucking snow so much back in the day. Remember that? Right? Before Al Gore invented global warming, right?

Used to snow like crazy. And you just went out with a shovel. She's knocking on people's doors, 20 bucks in driveway. And if I pushed you out, that's another tent. Yeah. And if you didn't fucking tip us, we're coming back with 22 shovels. The whole neighbor. We didn't bury you like it's fucking Siberia.

They won't get your car out to 2008 and shit. Good to fucking have you on. Thank you. I could tell from your interviews and just reading a lot about your feet when the book came out that the main thing is you're a fucking salesman. I am a salesman.

We sell from beginning to end. You know, that Pacino movie years ago. Always be selling. That is what we do. I sell in my sleep. I sell in, because nothing happens until you start selling. Selling's everything.

You're just a regular fucking mommo. You know what I'm saying? Until you go. I think people don't realize they think selling is just a salesman. It's the furthest thing from the truth. It doesn't matter what you do, business is personally. You're always trying to get your ideas, your points across to people.

You have it's a communication call, right? Without the ability to communicate what's on your mind in an effective way, you're going through life, like barely alive. That's what I think. What was the job that made you realize you were a real salesman? Like, you could sell whatever the fuck you had. The meat and seafood door to door was the first real big sales job, where I would go knocking on doors,

cold calling home to home, business to business, and selling them boxes of frozen meat and fish. I just broke the company record the first day by a country mile and never looked back. No, what was the company record, if you don't mind me? It was, they were averaging like five boxes per day. My first day, they gave me 35 boxes of meat in the truck. I sold all 35 boxes. I almost sold one woman in the truck, all right? And that first week, I sold 240 boxes.

I think the average production was like 30 for the car. I blew away the company. How long did you sell meat for? So I worked for this cook for about four weeks, and then I started my own meat company because I wanted myself for these MOOCs for, right? It was like, you know, they, half a time there was no food in the freezer, so I started my, because before that, I sold ICE's blanket to blanket on Jones Beach.

That's amazing, I heard that. But that wasn't a saying, that was just hard. That was hard work. That wasn't really sales. You know what I'm saying? So when you asked about what was the first sales job, it was really meat and seafood, right? Let's grab something real quick. So you would wake up in the morning.

Go to the Greek distributor of Astoria Queens, right? Load up four barrels, four cool. was white styrofoals with cherry lemon yeah yeah lemon ice king right and marinos marinos shipwitches fudgicles milky way snickers fully loaded cooler cost me 22 bucks i'd blow it out an hour for 130 bucks so for a day at 19 let me tell you 1978 that's a lot of how old were you 16 16 yeah didn't give a fuck i didn't give a fuck i was amazing it was amazing i'll take the mayful it wasn't the girls it was amazing it was that you got singles so you know how much four hundred dollars singles is it's like a million dollars that was the best part of it you know when you

woke up in the morning do you think of pussy or making money for it everything i've done was a pussy in my life everything single thing when you open your eyes and say god thank you for giving me another fucking day it's time to make money yeah fuck somebody in the ass it's time to make money so i could fuck someone in the ass beautiful that's it i'm honest with you know you have a but i'm a bit older now like i don't quite know right i got a lovely lovely wife who's the Best ever, right? I've been married 20. As a kid, but yes, that was my every, I loved women since I was.

I love women. When I was five years old, I have still have the scar to prove it. I was being chased by some little girl at nursery, and I ran into a brick wall just like that and cracked open my 16 stitches over my eye, all right? And ever since then, it's been downhill. You know, you made a quote that I don't quote you, but I try to portray it as much as I can and tell people that greed is not good. Right.

You know, ambition is good, but passion. Yeah. Passion. Well, when you were selling meat and beef, would you do it? I mean, you just loved it. You love getting up in the morning. And that fucking challenge of closing a motherfucker, that challenge of the guy going, I'm not interested.

Hold on. Let me, let me in. How many lobster tails do you eat a month? I'm away. You know, that fucking challenge of opening that fucking door, you know? I tell me every day. Call that chick. Tell her to suck your dick.

She's got a boyfriend. Practice. You know it was? I'll tell you the first. Practice. Keep calling. She'll keep saying no, but now you'll keep getting better. Listen, come over and suck my dick.

I can't. I have a boyfriend. Just come over for a little while. We'll look at pictures. I'll show you pictures of pugs. Whatever. I've always been self. Well, I guess I should have a boyfriend

that's very different. They're not interested. Right. There you go. My job was always. When I first got on the phones, I was taught to if they're going to buy from you

either they're going to die change their fucking number or shoot themselves but they're going to buy from you and you at first when you start selling you get discouraged when somebody hangs up on you my dick gets hard

when a motherfucker hangs up on me that's the guy I'm going to sell I'm going to call him till he dies jumps off a building or fucking or buys I got a lot of shit for that I was um he was 23

4 came out I made this statement. I said, you don't fucking hang up that phone until the customer buys or dies, and it got printed in Forbes magazine. And it was all, I was really, I mean, I got a lot of shit for that. But Forbes is a magazine for greedy fucking white people

that want to make money. So to say that fucking statement, it's the truth. When you go into sell anything, shoes, my sister-in-law called me last Tuesday, two weeks ago, and she's like, I'm getting a job. Now, my sister-in-law and her daughter gets out. Don't get confused with that Southern drunk.

Take your cell. My niece is the number one salesman, those people that come to your house with the vacuums. Kirby. No, the other ones. When your house burns down here, or your grandmother had cancer and she dies, they've got to clean the walls.

She'll come over and sell you a paint job. Like, my niece got a sudden draw, and she puts a bono. Right. You know, not the biggest tits. And she'll rip your eyeballs out. But she'll rip your fucking eyeballs out. And now the mother is out there on the workforce,

and she's making appointments. for a fucking insurance. Nothing more deadly than a mother-daughter team. Oh, yeah. So she's making an appointment. So she called me and she's like, I'm having a problem at work. Can you help me on? I call her, what's that fucking guy that we all learn from? What's the salesman?

The first one we... Zig Zig Ziglar? He's great. I called Zig Ziglar Jr. Zig Ziglar was great. Oh, Zig Ziglar was the motherfuckerger. It was great. So I call it Zig Zig Zigler.

So again, she's got the record of a ratio, the appointment to close. she's breaking the records and appointments but these fucking Gentiles are busting her balls you gotta put a lot more action into your into your pitch and she I go are you reading from the pitch and she goes yeah I always read from the pitch and I had my own stuff I said and you're breaking the office records she goes first month they can't deal with me

she goes I made one of the other girls quit she thought she was hot shit and blah blah blah blah blah blah and I go tell them to go fuck themselves as long as you're selling who gives the fuck what you do there you go that's my world you got to keep fucking selling that's what they teach you that the number one rule of a fucking boiler room or is you're gonna call them till they hang up or they die or they buy buy a die why do you think certain people are uh like selling is natural for them because selling is

not natural for me that that makes me uncomfortable right the are selling a communication what makes you uncomfortable. You ought to people of having to convince somebody of something? Not even just convincing, but when they say no, like, be like, okay, I don't want to bother them. Like the idea of sell until they either buy or die, that's... How do you become a good salesman, brother? I train salesman. Listen, I mean, it... Hunger. Hunger makes you become hungry. You know, listen, it starts with desire, pal, right? If you don't have the desire, then it's not for you. But if you have a desire,

anyone can learn to close but you have to want it listen you're not comfortable that you know what my suggestion to you is don't be in sales but still but that being said you still have to know how to get your point across as you move to the world

you live a disempowered life so you know it's not even you don't want to convince someone of buying a fucking vacuum cleaner but what do you have about are you having problems getting late well there you go I mean what knows what it is you have to convince people of things every fucking day negotiation

the toughest sale ever clothes was my wife. Seriously. Right. Had to hunt her down. I was like a freaking, I was like a store, almost close to a stalker with her, okay? And it was pretty close. It's like a fine line, you know what I'm saying? But the point is, is that, you know, it's not just, you think it's selling this.

He's talking hard sales, right? Selling is in everything. You got to be a pastor selling your congregation. A lawyer selling a jury. A teacher selling the kids on the value of education. A mom and dad selling their kids on the value of making their bed. A comedian selling material. Yeah, it's everything.

Sales is everything. You know, Terry Winter? Yes. Terry's a friend of my. He wrote the screen. Right, right. Terry tells the story how he broke into Hollywood. Without his ability to communicate and sell and persuade.

He would never been, and he's a brilliant guy. Here's what happens. Take 10 brilliant people with the same level of talent. You know who's going to win out? The guy who can communicate. Sell, explain his ability to close. What's the value? So I think you have a negative anchor towards selling.

and you know you can confuse that if you don't think of it differently think of it's communicating effectively right I'm not negative about it at I wish I was better at it but you can get better at it well then well the why do you think you guys it came so naturally to because some people are natural born closes they're all like every for every joey diaz and jordan belfort there's a million people who struggle with it but the beauty is is that you could teach anyone to become a successful salesperson right I'm not saying I'm going to make them into me or him, but I promise this. I can take any person that wants it and make them good enough so it doesn't hold them back in life. That's the point. It's, I was a pussy about it at first. I didn't like it either.

Listen, I don't like it either. I think that I would be lying if I said that I love the rejection. I don't think anyone likes rejection. But to me, I reframe it in my head as a game. All right. So the first day I went out, I was trained in that meat business. I watched the guy knock on 50 doors and strike out, and the guy put his head down and lost his state of certainty.

And I'll never forget that. It really impacted me. And I would, for me, it was like, if I'm knocking on doors or pick it, no one's bite, I am just fucked. I said, I am not going to fucking stop from my own personal fucking standard until I get someone. I know that, look at it this way, right? If I know my racial, I'll say, I know if I make 200 calls, you know, over the time you keep track, right?

I make 200 calls a day. I'll close 10 people. I'm just making up a number, right? So every time someone says no, I just made money. Because I know what that's worth to me. I get paid for nosy. Yes, this doesn't matter. It's a numbers game.

You understand? I'm wondering, boom. I just made $12. Thank you. I'm like, hey, thanks for fucking saying no. You just made $20 off you. It doesn't matter who. If you said, it's a numbers game sales.

That's what people don't get. He'll say, oh, sales is a numbs. That's what fucking is. You know, it's the numbers. The more times you cast your paw on the ocean, the more people you're going to catch, so to speak, right? Now, obviously, you have to close the deal, right? Because the worst, what happens, if you don't have to close, here's what happens to a lot of people, right?

Is that if you can't, the worst thing for any human being is to try to play that numbers game. But even when you get someone who can, who will buy, you can't fucking close them. Then what's the point of doing it? But when you have the power and you know you possess the ability to close anyone who's closeable. That doesn't mean you close everyone. Do you close anyone who's closable? You'll want to bang away because you know every single time you pick up the phone where they say yes or you're making money. That's the point.

I had a friend, you know, when we're all 18, everybody wants to go out and get a piece of chowchard. And I had a friend that every time he went out, he got a piece of that. Of course, right, yeah. That's a different, that's the ultimate self. Everybody would go home with their head down, and this guy would always leave with some fucking skank that was ready to fuck.

And the next day he'd show up with polaroids and a lighter up his ass. You know, it was just... And he wasn't either probably the best-looking guy, right? No. Yeah, it's unbelievable. I know. It's not about that. This would be, and one night, well, enough is enough.

Here I am with a pocket of blow, Quiludes, this, that. Quaylunds, that. I can't close. I can't close this fucking savage. But he's over there closing him with a quarter ounce of Coke. With a quarter gram a Coke in his pocket. He's closing the hottest bitch in the bar.

And I started to shat on him. And what would come out of his mouth was atrocities against Milanovich. What's that dude? It was like, they could have, they could have thrown him in jail. next to fuck in the worst people but he didn't fuck around and his percentage was higher when he got through with them they fucked them because he let them know right from

the start and I would hear him listen let me ask you something you know we're talking to this fucking Jordan guy what are you crazy I got an ounce of my pocket I put a rock in your ass hole and suck it out and their faces would turn pale and next thing you know they would be getting their purses and leaving or they were tell him he was a pig and walk away from him. And then all night he would send him drinks and apologize to him. He had eight of them working at one time.

So one of them was going to go home with him. He would have three bitches. And all of them, the opening... The numbers game. All of them, he would tell him, like, like, like, Coke Rock, I want to put on your clip. I want to put Alka-Seltzer and your pussy and suck it all. Their faces would melt. But he didn't give a fuck. He was closing.

He closed him at the bar. They knew they were sucking his dick. There was no, let's go home and listen to Birk back rack and you know drink and tell each other stories no we're coming on my house the fuck and i started doing it the first year it didn't work out too much people called 9-1-1 and shit like that but now my percentages want out there you got and i don't mean to be rude you know when you're 24 that's what you're living for is to go out and pick up women and you know whatever have a good time but it was the same thing it was what would he would come out of his mouth was fucking and he needed cocktails though

He was very shy, but he was American Indian. Well, nothing's better than fucking Quaylor for that. Yeah. We used to call him courage pills. Oh, please. Please. If those things would sink in, they'd be tremendous. Hold on.

You could do anything. Before we get to the guerrilla biscuits, when you go to Hawaii and you learn Hawaiian Kempo, they'll teach you a punch, right? They'll say, okay, you're going to punch Lee in the head. But before they teach you how to punch him, they teach you how to strike them in the head with a collie stick. Then they teach you how to stab him,

And the final move is the punch. Okay, so you learn all four, three phases of that move. You went from selling door to door and the beach. And then you went, you went from belly to belly sales. Right. And then you went into a boiler room. What was the difference now? Between those two?

Yeah. There's no difference. The guys like you and me. I was shocked. Well, I was in the meat business and I had heard my business was going, Downhill wasn't working out, right? Because I made a lot of mistakes and wasn't doing it. I was just my first time as an entrepreneur.

And what happened was my friend had said, oh, I heard me, when people are making money on Wall Street and he wanted to get a job there. What year is this? This was, 1986. And, you know, and what happened was he said to me,

yeah, they said, well, what do they do? He goes, well, they get wealthy people give the, I didn't know, I was from a poor family, right? He had wealthy people to give them money. And I assumed, so what do you go door to door? I assume you'd be knocking on people's doors. As I was trained in door-to-door sales. He's like, no, no, they call on the phone.

I'm like, how's that? I couldn't imagine it when I heard about it. I was like, what do you mean? You just call, it goes, yeah, you call on the phone and they send money. I was like, no fucking way. I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah, that was like a very casual conversation. Anyway, that was it. Then all, you know, our business went down and, you know, my car got repossessed,

and I heard a story by the kid in the local area. I grew up based on Queens, right? who was allegedly making a million bucks a year on Wall Street. And he was like the fucking dorker. I'm like, that guy's making a million dollars here. And about a week later, I ran into the guy. He pulled up in a Ferrari and I sued with a hot chick. I'm like, holy fuck, I want the chick to suit the fucking car.

And I said, Michael, what do you do? He goes, oh, I made a million. You know, a broker will always tell you with him. I made a million two last year. I'll make two million. And I said to myself, what you probably said to yourself, that fucker can make a million, I'll make 10. That's what I said to myself.

And I went down to Wall Street the next day and answered it and added a big firm. They were hiring LF Rothschild and I sold myself a job. And that was the first time I walked into a Wall Street board. But I could not believe, first of all, the language, the cursing, the shit. I mean, it was unbelievable. And also, they were actually calling people up randomly from all over the country that they'd never met before. And on a phone call, people would send in a million dollars. It was the most shocking thing to me that it was suspension of discipline.

I would not have believed it if I didn't see it. of my own lives. That was how it was going on. So when I first saw that, I was like, for a moment, I said, well, oh, wow, it'll be better even door to door. And then I saw the power of the numbers you can hit on the telephone. And I read and it hit me and I watched these guys do it. And I was very fortunate. I was sitting. It was my desk part. The guy was training me was a really good salesman. This guy, right? Markana. And he played by Matthew McConaughey in the movie. And and I heard him sell like, holy, like that guy's good. And I hear that guy sucks. Right. And And I had this ability.

I knew it. So I was so sure I was going to break the records on Wall Street as a broker. And then my first day was Black Monday when the market crashed. November 17th. October 19th, yeah. And went down 508 points. The firm shut down. And that was the beginning of everything.

Now, when did you, once the firm shut down, when did you start selling in a boiler room? So, well, theoretically, I mean, that was a boiler room. It was a prestigious firm with all phones in one room. It's no difference. It was just the same thing. They were doing the exact same thing as any other phone-based room, except they had a fancy name behind it, but it was just no difference, right?

So it was massive outgoing telemarketing. Lehman Brothers was doing it, massive outgoing telemarketing from one location. How many guys on one room? There was 50 when I was in, 50 guys. Jell and screaming. Yelling screaming going wild. The same exact shit, right? And then I went and I, so when they shut down,

I threw, I answered and at first, I left the head of my book because I didn't have time to write it all, right? I went to another firm for a few days in Jersey, your guy, the guy you know. I walked into this place. I was like, what the fuck? It was like the mob on fucking wall. And I worked over

three days and I left. They heard me pitch once and they were so astonished that when I opened up my mouth to sell, because I was like eight billion times better than any guy in the room, they were like, they made me stop. It's true story. I'll tell you, stock I saw some stupid company called

Panther Mountain Waterpark up in the fucking Great Gorge area. It didn't even exist probably, all right? And they were just taking this thing public and I mean it was a penny stock right? And I wrote this script and started selling the guy made me stop. And he goes, everyone listened to how this guy sells and the next day I left. I couldn't tell, I knew

something was wrong. It was really fucking nuts, right? And I went to work at a small Long Island firm called the Investor Center and there and that was where I walked, they heard me pitching the same as you saw in the movie, same thing. They were like, what the fuck are you doing? I had a certain way of selling, right? And and the rest is history. Now, I'll slow it down if you won't, but then, you know,

it's the movie's pretty accurate like that, yeah? So then, now how long did it take you to get a Series 7's life? I already had my Series 7 because when I worked at Rothschild, I was studying, I worked for six months cold calling and I, and I had my Series 7, yeah. What did you think about cold calling? Like Yellow Pay. It was frustrating.

Well, I was cold calling of what are called D&Bs, Donna Bradstreet Leeds, who just lists of, you know, names of people that had... Who have invested already? No, no, business that owned businesses that would do it back then. and was doing it excess of a million dollars in sales. That's all it was. Business owners, right?

And you just call call, make three to $400 a day. And back then, believe it or not, I couldn't even, I wasn't licensed. And I had to say, hello, I missed the hat holding and passed the phone. So for me,

that was like fucking Chinese water torture, you know, to not be able to speak. And I would just listen to everyone else and I was like, just running all the language in my house. Like, I can't wait to get this. I'm going to fucking kill. I knew it, you know?

And then when the market crashed, it was like, all my hopes and dreams were dashed. And like a micro sec. I couldn't believe it that day. It was unreal. It really was unreal. It was the month,

but the reason why I said November 17th, I'm sorry, is because I got arrested November 18th, 87 before the market crashed. And I was selling cars at that time. Where? I was selling cars in Boulder. I had a Subaru dealer.

It was like stealing. Right. Okay, I went from detailing cars to selling cars. I took the bust, and it was, that's when I became a salesman. Because after that, market crash everything died and there was only two people selling cars it was me and this guy named stormin norman o let that was a fucking savage he was in the halfway house at the time i hadn't been

arrested yet and i still remember him telling me do you see anything funny on my body and me going no why and he would put a hot water bottle and his he would scots tape his mother's douchebag those hot water bottles rubble ones and then he would have a valve and just the same thing. It would come out of his dick because he was snorting coke all day at the dealership. So he would put the fucking fake piss in there. He would pay like 25 bucks for piss if you were clean.

Like he would get it from, he finally talked this Christian guy. Like the Christian guy would tell him, no, no, I'm a Christian. Leave me alone. He finally put him together. The same piss. The guy was just a salesman. And that was the first time that I started looking at people like, what

the fuck of these guys doing? But before that, there was guy named Artie Pressler from the Bronx was a killer he was a psychological salesman killer you know don't ever let the customer write down the credit app you fill it out for them I want them to tell you their life story so they get used to you fucking asking them creepy questions he just had little fucking details and I loved all those things and yeah I wanted to be an attorney but this art this thing of fucking selling had my dick by the balls now interesting matthew mccanahey did another movie years ago called one for the

money i never saw it was about these guys aka stew finer out of long island and mike duffy that sell sports information on the phone and it was uh becino and matthew mccaneh and their real name or the slopes i went to work for them out of long island i worked with them where in l'lisland i forget what part of Long Island, they were from wherever Seinfeld was from. Syosset, they all went to the same high school. Seres, Jericho High School. Yeah, they all went to that same high school, whatever. There was something in the water over there, because a lot of my guys came from Seinfeld.

Syracet, whatever the fuck. And they were, they were phone salesmen that sold sports information. What year was this? This is, I got out of prison, 89. Massapequa? Massapequa. And I went to work for them from 89. That's when Stratton was.

I was surprised at him. To 92 selling sports. That's my hate. That was the prime of Stratton. And we would call people, you know, Jordan, how are you doing? Joey Deer. Pete Pitello is my name. Pete Pitello, Colorado Sports Advisors.

How are you making out in the gambling? Go fuck yourself. Bam, call them back. Listen. Stop and knock it off. You're fucking taking a beat and you're fucking. You know, sports betting's big now. Big now.

Now I'm thinking of doing more things. Yeah, it's huge. Because now that's why. And the only reason why they're making it huge is so you could go back to work. Bad you get a series because they're going to turn them into hedge funds. That's what they're doing with sports gambling, right? Did you hear that?

No. That they're going to put in New York is next. So they could do hedge fund gambling. So you don't even know who you're gambling on. They place the bets for you or some shit. Oh, shit. That's where they're going with legalized gambling. Interesting.

But to make a long story sure, but I was not approached directly. There was a chitter-chatter going on in my hometown about a guy who was making a million dollars a month selling stocks. I knew about stocks, how I knew about, you know, pornos. I knew nothing. I knew nothing. And I kept hearing the little jingle.

I'm selling coke. I'm robbing drug dealers. I'm putting, but I keep hearing the jingle of these guys and I'm making money. But now they had opened the stride office in Miami. I go to Colorado and I'm hearing fucking horror stories

10 guys are going down there at a time And Aida coming back To them, they weren't ever in rehabs then You just weren't to talk to your priest You know Or the rabbi You know I got the devil inside of me

I can't stop snorting coke And eating quailoots Nobody knew about rehab The worst part is what you do When you're high on coke and slow Things that you're the acts that you commit Oh my God The sexual depravies

Is what you did your priest for Like, I can't snort Coke and do comedy. But you give me a line of Coke and you give me a pitch and you give me a bunch of phone cards. Oh, I'll be snorting and calling people to the morning. How you doing? Have you heard of the Kennedy assassination? I mean, I will get them going on topics and then sell them. Then come back to the finger in the ass.

So you get your Series 7's license. When does the money start piling in? This is 87 now. 88. So, hey, the market crash. I started in 88 as a broker for this company and I invest in a sense. I broke the record straight away. How much money are we making of this?

Fact started right? No, sure. No, sure. $70,000, $8,000 a month in the beginning. That is a broker. And then after like the fifth, fourth month, I started my own firm. So about six months in. So I was approached after 30 days to start to by a guy who said, hey, you know, you're the best

salesman. I've ever heard, best trainer of salesman. because I was already helping him train some sales people there and he goes, dude, let's go partners. And then he took him to see a lawyer in Great Neck, right? And I went with him to this lawyer. And after the lawyer, he goes, you don't need this other fucking guy.

You know more than this guy. I already been in business and failed once. And when you fail, so you learn how to do business. I have really learned my lesson about how to start a business in Rumble. So I made a decision to start my own brokerage firm when I was very young.

And in the beginning, I was selling penny stocks, right, to average moms and pops. Then I came up with an idea. And the idea I had was to cross what I'd seen on Wall Street with not penny, but $5 stocks. So it was selling $5 stocks to the richest 1% of Americans. So what's happening was on Wall Street, they were calling the rich people. And in these little firms like that you knew about in Miami, right, they were calling average people with little or no money, but selling him 20 cents stocks, they'd invests $500, right? So I'd watch guys bring in millions,

so I came with this idea of this middle ground of going after the millionaires, but selling them $5 stocks. And it worked so well when I, and how is I invented a system for training salesmen called the Straight Line, and it allowed me to take all these young kids who couldn't close.

What happens, I had one guy, my junior partner, Danny, who was a, you know, I trained, he was a great closer. The other guys could not close rich people. I had 12 guys. I tried everything didn't work and when I came up with this new way of training people of how to close it just was like it was such a profound difference

that I could take any person and make them into a killer salesperson and that was it. The next month I made I made I think probably four or five million bucks the next month it went from like it went so fast that I went from making a million dollars a year to make him 50 million within six months so how does it work

so for the people working for your firm Do you get a percentage of their commission? So there's two ways that you make money. Really three, but simply put, let's say a stock is trading at $6. Okay. Right? And the bid is five and the offer is six. That $1 is called the spread, right?

So if a broker sells 10,000 shares at six, that's $60,000 and that $10,000 gap is the potential commission. So you would split that $50, 50, $50. Keep 5, the broker would keep 5. But what the broker didn't know is I had the stock. I owned it at $2. So I made $3 below the bid. That was mine. 100% was mine if I traded right.

So I had a supply of stocks. The idea was how do you get a supply of stock cheap, right? So just because the stock, imagine you buy a million inches of stock. It's two. And you hold it. And the stock goes up to five. You got a $3 million potential profit. They have to be able to sell it.

When I indebted the straight line system, I could get these young kids to sell to a, They would call millionaires, and they'd sound like geniuses, and they could close them. So with that before that, they couldn't with the regular sales system. So that was like the sort of great equalizer. It allowed them to be as powerful as the top Wall Street broke in terms of persuasion. So once that happened, it just went apes. It was crazy because all these kids who would have been working in 7-Eleven became master salespeople,

and they were making millions the year, and I was making a million a week. It was just crazy. And it just grew and grew and grew. And it was fucking insane. When did When did you start going personally crazy? Like, when did, how old were you when you? 27, 26, 27.

It was too much to hand. Yeah, yeah. Listen, I come from a really good family. My parents were amazing, you know, amazing people. It wasn't like I was raised that way in any stretch. I was raised the opposite, you know? I think for me, it was that I went into my adulthood with a lot of wounds from my adolescence that I said,

if I just get rich, man, I'll have fucking... I started playing on every adolescent fantasy I ever had. And I was so good at closing and training others to do. As good as I was selling, I was even better at training others to close. That was my real gift, even more. I mean, selling, yeah, that was easy, but training others. And that, people started calling me the king,

and I couldn't handle it. I was stupid. You stopped believing your own bullshit when you're young. young, right? I mean, now I'm a little older and wise, hopefully. And it just, you know, all of a sudden, every girl wanted to fuck me. And it just was, I was had, it just, it was a, it was very difficult for me at 25 or 26 years old to deal with that much power. And also, I think that, you know, what happens is a lot of people, you probably see this in Hollywood, right? Is that when you're on, when you're struggling to get rich, if you're not feeling good inside, you're like, okay, well, it's okay. Because, you know, I don't have what I want right now. When I get rich and I have every,

Then I'll feel good. So you can make sense of insecurities. You can make sense of not feeling great about yourself. But what happens when you get everything you ever wanted in lifetimes a thousand and you still feel like shit inside? Then what do you do? That's what the fucking real panic sets in. And then enter Kualudes, cocaine and fucking massive amounts of eating bed. Peefe.

And ass. Because it makes me to an animal when I do. I'm a check going fucking hide. I'm the most normal. I really am. Thank God I'm sold for 20 plus years, right? I love my wife to death. She's the best ever.

Greatest woman in the world, right? You give me a fucking eight ball. God knows what the fuck I will do. I'll be in our fucking whorehouse eating and hoping they're at that period. Because I'm fucking sick. And by the way, anyone who's been a Coke that knows what I'm talking about. It's not, I'm not crazy. You know it, Joey, right?

It's crazy. It's something wrong with the drug. It makes you a sexual fucking demon. and I loved it. He knows. And I fucking loved it. I tell him all the time, punching chicks in the stomach, making them puke and make them swallow your common.

And when I was right, and I'm not on it, I don't have anything. Making them puke. I don't have anything close to that compulsion. That compulsion doesn't exist in me. It does not. But when I do coke, it's like, I don't know what the fuck it is. And I thought there was something wrong until I was everyone else is doing the same shit when they're on it.

It's crazy. Like people are getting tied up and pulling hair and choking women. I want to be choked. Choke me, kill me, beat me. There was a chick I used to snort coke with in Aspen. I had to be 23. She was like 29. I would come on the table and she would,

I would make it suck it through a straw. Dude. Disgusting. I had a friend. Come on feet. He'd pay hookers 10,000 of shit in the glass table while he could look underneath. When he's on fucking,

no day in the fucking life. I had a friend that came to me in 94. I looked at him straight in the face. You're still banging hookers? He goes, It's too dangerous out there I make him jerk me off with their feet He wasn't I can understand that

He was driving and he makes perfect sense to me He didn't miss a beat That's why I knew he wasn't lying Makes perfect sense When did all that What year did all that? 1997 start start start Start it started

In earnest in 1990 And how many years of madness was Seven money seven Unlimited money Eight years of unlimited money Eight years You just calling the guy to deliver it over a keyout yes you're just delivering the guy yes a kilo why fuck around I mean you're just

same brand I had a guy who's got it right from the airport pure right there yeah that that that time but my big thing was quailets I I literally single-handedly cleaned out every country of quailudes like pharmacy we know it's like you know every country at its own brand the quailets right so when the when the US made them illegal in the late 80s no early late 70s right so when I was in college they were illegal but you still it were gone but you were scared they were able to drug for sleeping, you know, in the 70s, right? They made them illegal, but they swept and took a lot of the supply, but you still had them out there for like a few more years.

Then by 84, most of the real ones were gone, but you could still get like met the seals from Switzerland, Paladin Burma from Spain. You get Normanox from Germany, Mandrax from, I know. What was the shit in pattern that he used to call them Paris Blues? You know, Paris 400s. There was Bethlehem. Yeah, Paris 400s.

Yeah, there was another, in every type of quail that has own little formulation. So someone, look, what's this here? What's this? Quaylude to one, yeah, this can't be real, no way. Open it up. I'll tell you in a second. This guy's got a fucking pit. There you go.

My eye's eye, what is this? Does it say, does it say Roar on it? It's Rora. That's the, when the FBI swarmed Cosby, I knew the agent. He threw me the last three of them. Really? No, that's a, that's a, like, I'm, I'm just, What do you call those?

Like a Zibo. What do they call them? A placebo. A placebo. What the fuck am I. I was like sweating here. Oh my God. Oh, yeah.

Three of them. Let me listen. I would honestly, I'm sober for his. 20 years. I would take one right now. Oh, no. If you gave me a real quailant, I had my wife tie me up so I couldn't create damage. Because you don't want to get, I would get phonitis.

They called the phonitis because I wanted to call everyone. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you.

I love you. I love you. I love you. unplug all the phones in my house, Max White. I love you, man. I love you. When I got this, there were three of them. Before my wife had the baby, I ate one of them one Friday night. Just after they all passed out, I ate one.

And I was on so much reference shit, I didn't even know what it was. You know, I didn't know what it worked. I love the bottle, though. Yeah, look at the fucking bottle. Cheers. Take it to your office. This is fucking great. So what is this thing, though?

What's in there? It's a pleaser, whatever. Fuck. A fake one. Like a... Look at it. But it's perfect. Really?

It's a dummy, but it's perfect. Go give me 10 years of the case. It's one of the nicest gifts I've gotten in 30 years. Please. This is a Rolex watch. I want this, Joey. I want this. That's a, I appreciate you taking the time to come in here.

Awesome, by the way. So now when? Let me show with everybody. Hold on. This is vintage, by the way. So this got, this label got me in deep trouble. Yeah. It said, because when I read, I had this experience with the car crashes, right?

I took, they were expires. They were delayed fuse. And I fucking just, like, you know, lost my shit, you know? How many did that? What's the most? did it one night well I went through a about really do them in the daytime like I saw watch the movie you do all all time I would take four in the morning before my I would get up at like 6 a.m. before my wife so I could get my first

high go up and down before she fucking woke up and I got really bad I was probably doing 22 a day 20 20 20 you know it's so funny how these fucking gemoak's the opiate epidemic what the fuck were you in 79 when we were eating gorilla biscuits. I just remember giving my buddy Aquila and tell him, be careful he's like, I got this. You get a 10 speed. The next day I saw him with a fucking cast. Cracked, and it

cracked up 10 speed. Hilarious. You know what it was? You didn't really, you felt coordinated, right? You thought you had it together. You did. And you'd be like just fucking bouncing off walls. But what they would do, see, breaking is on. He must have really taking a fucking fall because it almost like turned, you got rubberized a bit. Like you could

bounce off fucking walls. You wouldn't get hurt. That is But I'll tell you what, I remember in the long LA, New York, Long Al Expressway, right? On Sunday mornings, it was a club called Infinity. Remember that? It was a fucking crazy nightclub back then with all matches. We were fucking upstairs. It was just nuts. You would see lines of cars smashed up on the highway on Sunday morning.

Everyone came home on Lourdes thinking they could drive and just destroyed their fucking cars. Remember that? When did you start feeling the heat? First, the FCC came at you? No, no. It was SEC. FCC. I'm sorry.

SEC. SEC. SEC, yeah. The Securities. Exchange Commission. They came at me early in like 90 through 94, and I settled with them. And then the FBI came in after, and because of money, I'd smuggled to Switzerland. Now, in the movie, you invite the feds over to your boat.

Yeah, yeah. Is that true? No. They just made, okay. Yeah. That was a good scene. That's a great scene. Yeah, yeah. That's something I would do. They want it because what happened.

I would have taken a call. You just said it, phone eyewis. I'm the type of motherfucker to take two quailas and call the FBI office. How are you doing? You're investigating me? Come on down. The purpose that scene was because, you know,

the thing was that Coleman is a friend of mine. Now the agent's a friend of mine. It's a good guy. And we speak all the time, right? And back then, we had this parallel. He chased me for like seven, eight years, but we never saw you. So it was not enough for the movie.

It was much better if you get it. It was a meeting in the middle. So increased the tension. So. And then when did you get arrested? 1998 September. They come to the house. The house.

They came to my house. Not at all. They're incredibly respectful. To me, incredibly respectful. I left the house with my daughter. She wanted to go to blockbuster video. I'm a blockbuster back then, right? And as I was pulling out, there was a car outside my gates.

And there's some woman goes, excuse me, do you know where this road is? and I was like, no, no, then another guy, I thought I was getting kidnapped. And then she was, oh, stop not from the FBI. And she was, listen, you probably want to drive back in and drop your daughter home. I was like, oh, okay, well, I appreciate that. And I went in, they just, they followed me in. They didn't pull any guns, nothing. They walked me in.

They said, listen, you know, you're under arrest and just coming into your office, and I just walked in there, and they just, they came in a lot of them, had to be tentem in the house. They did not pull guns, nothing. What was your bail? 10 million. How long did you sit inside? Two days.

And then how long until you got sentenced? Oh, it was a long time. A few years. Were you broken? Were you broken that time? No. No. No, I wasn't broke, but there's nothing worse.

I'd rather have been broke and gone to jail the next day than the slow descent into fucking hell. That's the worst part of all. The worst part was that it took a few years. Because, you know, it doesn't happen quickly. You know, the wheels of justice grud. No, they tried to prosecute me quickly. Yeah, that's very rare. I kept playing with it.

I kept playing with it, firing attorneys. Yeah, and it took a long time, and that was like the slow descent into like, and you couldn't restart your life, and it was pretty fat. Once I got out, it was like, it was just, you know, it was right back up. When did you realize you were going in at one point? You knew from day one you were going away. Yeah, I know it was going on. What was your attorney telling you?

I mean, there was no money in the world. You got to do some time, you know? But, you know, hopefully it was your first offense. non-violent, you know? And so I figured I'd do a few years, you know, and, you know, we had this, you know, I got, I got four years, but the deductions for the drug program to go through.

Anyway, I would qualify for the drug program. It was me. Everyone was trying to get into that. I was like, I'm like a tailor-made for it, right? So I went through the drug, got 18 months off like that, good behavior. And when I got out, you know, so when I got very fortunate,

because as you know, his friend sitting here, Tommy Chong was my bunkmate. from Cheech and Chong. They put us in the same cell together. So when I got to jail, I'm saying with Tommy's an awesome dude. You should have them on your podcast.

You came on. Oh, he's amazing. You're really smart, right? Yeah, brilliant guy, right? So, and Tommy's like, we tell each other stories and I had him rolling on the floor and, you know, by the third night,

he was like, dude, I thought you were full of shit but my wife Googled you and it's all true because you've got to write a book. I was like, really? Because, you know, you don't think your own life is in something? Never. I was like, what do you mean? My life's really?

I thought everyone sunk yachts and crashed planes and did a billion drugs and made all my money. How crazy is that? Nothing happened for me until I told my story. I know. I was cracking jokes. Nothing was happening because I thought that everybody else had delivered papers. I thought everybody else sold ice at the beach with 25 bucks.

I thought I was just a regular guy. Me too. Well, I know I wasn't regular. We know we were insane, but I just, I guess, you know, when you're living it, you become desensitized to your own insanity, right? I remember this moment in my life in probably 1996 when I was living in old Brookville, beautiful, the Gold Coast, nicest area in the world, right? Mansions everywhere, and I had a mansion.

And then with my wife in the car and we're like driving around, they must all do ludes, right? Everyone's doing ludes and coke that you don't think anyone could go through life sober when you're like that. Like I convinced myself everybody else was doing what I was doing. and to think back at that moment now is pretty laughable, but that's what you do. So when Tommy said to me, you know, I've never heard of anyone living this sort of life like you've lived. I was like, well, that's a lot coming from Tommy Chong.

So I gave me some, so I started writing and Tommy would help me. You know, gave me a couple of pointers. And I fortunately was able to crack the code for writing. I taught myself to write. And I started writing and then people liked it. and then Leo and Marty, as soon as the book was done, the rest is history.

The Wolf of Wall Street. A tremendous story. A tremendous movie. I'll tell you, there's something incredible about Martin Scorsese that you can't quantify it or put your finger on it, but somehow he created a movie that will go down forever.

It's a generational movie. And I don't think anyone, Leo was right, because Leo was the one who attached himself to it and was Leo's passion project. And Leo said to me, just trust me, buddy. Marty has to, he need Marty to direct this movie. There was a lot of other directly.

Scott wanted to direct this a lot. I was getting frustrated because Marty's very slow. You know, it took, it was many, many years. I sold them the book in 2006, mid-2006, end 2006, right? And it was like, it just takes forever. And he's like, just trust me, let me get Marty. He was right.

I mean, Marty was able with Leo, of course, as well as brilliant, but he's got a special talent for telling a story. And I think what it is, you know what it is? I'll tell you. Is that he doesn't tell a story with judgment. The one thing I hate about the movies, I'm sure you hate this to me. Everyone, you all hate this, right? I don't want to be fucking moralized, too. Don't tell me how I should feel when I watch something.

Let me fucking watch it and come by my own conclusion. I don't want a morality tale, all right? Just tell me what happened and let me draw the morality. from it and Marty put it up on screen as it was for better or worse without you know in some sorts of say he glamour yeah he didn't glamour it was glamorous it wasn't glamorizing it was glamorous and that's what he did and also was dark and disgusting

and he put that up too I actually I enjoyed about the movie the most it's real I enjoyed the movie I really good movie I put it up there with good fellas I love the movie it was great if you tell me what's my favorite part of that movie is he took me there I had to go to the bathroom and take two bonhitz and take a half of Xanax he took me there he reminded me of my own of that time you know I told you that I had the same yeah they came they said do you want to sell on the phone I mean I was gonna give it a try but when I went down and looked and felt it didn't feel right something just didn't

feel right it felt like it was too fucking easy and it was I I find it difficult to understand the world the way it is. I think it's fucking crazy what's happened in the last five years with this world, with political correctness and all this shit. It's just, I don't know. I just think that it's a lot worse than it was in terms of, except for as it is.

But I just think it's ridiculous what's going on right now. All of a sudden every word has to be watched that you say and everyone's fucking sensitive and everyone, everyone's being, you know, me too or whatever to. I think it's just gross. I'm an immigrant. And I'm going to get immigrant that face New York

city. My parents immigrants. And the last Israel? No, no. Europe. France and Russia. I thought you were Jewish. Well, yeah, but yeah, but French and Russia. Yeah. Okay, right, right, right. I thought that I'm Cuban. And when I came here, my first thing

my mother said to me in 66, the 68 or one time I got the PS-1, 66, it's like, look, you're going to talk English outside the house, and in the house you're going to talk Spanish. I don't want you doing that meter routine. out there. I don't want them to look at years week. And I'm going to go, well, and I started thinking about it. That's great advice. I'm not sticking up for nobody. I'm not political. I got

felonies. I do not want to fucking go to jury duty. I'm not sticking up for anybody, anything in particular. I was growing up on, and I swear to God, up to 85 or 86, if I was at a cafe and you and your mother were talking Israeli for more than five, six minutes in New York, somebody would come up to you and go, oh, English. Yeah. And you would go,

whatever the fuck you're saying. They would go, go back to your own fucking country. I mean, it was well-known in New York. You know, I, yeah, I get it. And I think that... It was just a statement in New York. It's misunderstood.

It's misunderstood. What it means. I didn't get offended when I was a kid. You know, when you say go back to your own country, that doesn't mean... First of all, I love immigration. We all, but come legally and also appreciate for being here. But I don't want anyone to leave and go back, but if you hate the country, you should

leave the country. Why the fuck should you be? If you don't love the country, then you should get the fuck out and go back to your own country. But not because anyone that anyone, I don't care what, call you where you're from. If you want to be here and love this place, for me, my door's open, not my house, but, you know, come here and enjoy this country and everything has to offer. But if you want to come here and hate on this country, get the fuck out. That's my point.

I don't care what you want. Everyone should be welcome. But when you come here, you should learn to speak the language. Okay, you should pay fucking taxes. You should fucking be a production. You know, I don't, it really bothers me the way the press is twisting the message. Because, you know, listen, Trump says stupid shit. I'll say he misphrases himself sometimes.

But he doesn't, that his meaning is clear. His meaning is not saying that people who are law, who love the country where immigrants should leave the country. But if you hate this country, why are you here? Very different. I think all immigrants have the right to. come here legally, all right? And I welcome the fuck. My parents immigrants.

But, you know, it's just something odd is going on. It's something very strange. I'm not sticking up. It's very strange going on right now. Right. I'm not sticking up with Trump or something. No, it's not what it's about. I mean that.

I'm just saying that. He says stupid shit. He makes mistakes. He says, you know, I didn't take it personally the other day. And I've been doing that statement. It doesn't mean that, right. Since 1966, I've been hearing that statement from New York. It's manipulated by the press for political reasons.

Okay. And, you know, he's almost, he's like the unfunny comic Trump. Anyone else could say what he says it to be okay? He says it that just drives people crazy. I think on some level he's doing it on purpose to fuck. At this point, he's just looking to push people's got to be at this point. Look, he's looking to do it because I'm like, because I'm like, oh, my God, I mean, you're going to really fall for this shit that he said, you guys are really going to react to control the news cycle again. Are you that stupid that you really are going to write about this?

It's so obvious this. He just says shit and they just go nuts and like it's stupid at this point, you know? It was just, oh, I'm sorry. Because it just, to me, the numbers that were thrown out in the movie

were just so mind-blowing and I'm not a fan of Trump personally, but can you explain the power that that amount of money gives you? Like when you were on the plane and you got tied down. Like, maybe not even for Trump, but just like what that amount of money will do.

It doesn't, it doesn't. It's a misconception. It gives you power until, doesn't. You know, it gives you power that I could fall down and someone will pick me back up. It gives me power if I break a small law that I can buy my way out with great attorneys, all right? But, you know, when you, you know, nowadays especially, we live in a different world. I don't care who you are. You know, the big you are, they gun for you right now and everything you did becomes, oh, I have a lot of close friends that in the last few years have been really,

they've taken major falls from graces, but things they've done or allegedly done 30 years. prior and I have a problem with that all right and I have a daughter who I love to death who but you know I have a problem with people being choose for things that are not provable from 30 years ago I think it's just gross and disgusting and it's not fair it's on America that's why I say whatever I did 30 years ago now I just put it out that I don't give a fuck whether it's robbing right only thing one time I went into a car bar I was 10 lann I fucking love Carvel by the grandma blog come on dog I just went to shoot the the many saints of Brooklyn and I was in it was

Ridgewood, Brooklyn, who we were shooting. And as I went in, they had a fucking Carvel that Abe Lincoln went to, I think, when he fucking was in New York that for a short stint. I mean, and for somebody else who would have saw that, they would have gone crazy. My dick got hard. My dick got hard. And the next day, look at this fucking Carvel. Look at this Carvel.

Wow. It's a shack in Ridgewood right there. No, it's not even, it's not even, it was like three blocks before you get the Ridgewood. It was fucking old. So the next day, I see a Bank of America, look at it from the side. The next day, I'm in my fucking trailer,

and I go, what the fuck am I doing this trailer? Let me go take a walk on this Merdle Avenue. And I didn't walk 50 fucking feet. And what's there waiting for Papa? A brand new Carvel, like the new state of the art ones. And I saw two Chinese chicks in there making fucking shakes. And I'm like, oh, we're going to have a problem.

Because they bought up as an investment. It's not like the old guy with the missing foot where we were kids. He had the Carvel because he loved Carvel. His wife had diabetes. The kids were fat. The one kid lost in the high when he was eight from eating so much Carvel. It wasn't an investment. It was all good, though.

If you go to the Carval in Santa Monica and Culver City, it's an investment. Yeah, I get it. You walk in there. You feel like you're getting around. rape 480 for a cone yeah and then you go to the guy you from New York they I was like I'm from Iowa you don't have the right to sell Kyle bitch you got to earn that right for your fight the party it's like lemony ice king of Corona yeah like lemon ice of car you know there's just certain things so I went in there and I go the lady comes

up to say can I help you you know me I open up with a double cone vanilla chocolate and color with sprinkles of whipped cream oh yeah I was telling them and I get a chocolate shake very thin and then dip it and then eat it. That's how I grew up. There's a place in the village, my daughter, three, two gay guys. It's a gay ice cream.

Big gay ice cream. Yeah, I've seen that. How cool. It was fucking good, by the way. They do the Carvels. I thought it was going to be something different. I thought it was going to be like scoop icees. And she's like, oh, it was so good. Big guys. I walk into a fucking carvel dip.

I fucking, that's the best. And see, there, the owners, you get it? It's like a fucking family thing. I need a family. Right. No. The people that work there are just like there. It's their fucking thing.

Yeah. Very cool. I want to go to a car. People line up around the block for big ice cream. Yeah, the mother weighs 800 pounds. No, it's the whole thing. It's a fucking real pounds. It's a fucking real thing.

It's real. It's a roller skates. You lost a foot that die of it. Exactly. That's a carvel owner. And they keep eating Carvel even in spite of all. Yeah, no matter. Exactly.

In fact, I bought the milkshake. I ordered a large and I looked at the Weight Watcher points. And I go, fuck. I better just get a small. I took three sips out of it and I threw it away. But I did buy two things of flying saucers for the girls on the set. Remember the Carvel trucks that used to go by?

Oh my God. Oh my God. Mr. Softie? Mr. Softie was my shit, right? That was my shit too. So 2000, when you get arrested? When do you turn yourself in for prison? 2003.

Four. When do you come on? 2000, in the 2005. How are you feeling? Ripped in good shape. I came out in really good shape. And with a book, 150 pages of a book,

I threw it away, but I taught myself to write. So I learned this skill. while I was away. And I came out and started writing. What were you thinking about the outside when you came out? What were you thinking? How were you going to get treated? One of my kids.

No, I didn't care about it. I had never worried about that at all. And how old is your daughter that you speak? No, she's 26. And she's the one from the... She just graduated from grad school at NYU. She's a really successful. My son's a rapper.

My son's a businessman works for me for kids all together. And this is with that first wife? Two... Ron in the movie. She's my second wife. Okay. I have two, and then I have a... stepson with my current who is like my own son. He's the same thing. And so he works for me.

And I'm very, all my, my second kids is a rapper, hip-hop. And he's going to be famous. He's really talented. And he's awesome. All my kids are, I'm very fortunate. But for me, when I came out, it was all about my kids. I came out. I didn't speak to an adult probably for, I mean, more or less for like about a year. I hold up in a little tiny apartment in Plya del Rey. no money and I started writing that book and my kids would come over and they'd say shh daddy's writing you know and I said to my daughter said I'm gonna write a bestseller and become famous you know I said that thought said I never believed it's because I was scared I wouldn't finish so I told her person I wouldn't let her down I said I'll never let my

daughter down so I used it as a way to motivate myself especially when she told my ex-wife then I really had to fucking do it right so I had no choice but to finish this book I told my daughter I was going to be her famous writer because I was scared I would never finish I I was so I did that to motivate myself and I finished the book about 10 months but by the time I was on page 12 I had sent it to an agent I just you know knew very casually and he read the page and he was like he looked he said did you write these yourself I was like yeah he's like holy shit because I thought tom wolf had written them because I had modeled Tom wolf I learned to write like Tom Wolfe or at least tried to and he goes write 10 more pages I wrote 10 more and I sent them those pages he goes

stop everything you're doing. He goes, you don't understand what's about to happen to your life. His name was Joel Gowler. I said, what? He goes, you don't know. He goes, this is going to be the biggest book. He goes, Leonardo de Caprio's going to play you

and Marty Scorsese is going to do. I swear to God they said this. On page 22 of the book, I thought he was Adam's mind. So I just literally didn't work. I hold up in his little apartment for about 10, 11 months, and I wrote 1,200 pages and that

and Random House it got bought by Random House right after the 30 pages so I had money and you know I had some money at least to live and I went through seven edits on the book

to go from 1,200 down to 528 pages and and yeah and as soon as that magic was done the first guy to latch on wasn't Leo

he was second Terry Winter was 10 There's Terry, once Terry, for the sopranos, right, and ball again, but once he said, I have to adapt this everyone. Leo is like almost a sudden Leo came on board and Marty came on board. And then then came to slow Marty hell because Marty's just slow. You still talk to Terry? Terry, I just texted him today, by the way.

Tell him, I sent him my love. Yeah, I sent him a text today. Don't forget about me from Atlanta nocturn. He's an amazing, Terry's really, he's writing this thing now. He's such a great, he's such a great ride. He took T.J. English's book and we put it into I have not read the script

but I have heard the stories. Apple TV bought it. So Apple's been breaking his balls, too much Fidel. Not enough Fidel. Some shit's going. Let me just tell you about Terry. Terry's brilliance. I know it is. He has no ego. He loved my book

and he took my book and somehow formulaically turned it into a movie script. He didn't try to make it Terry Winter's version of my book. He took it and he's a brilliant guy with no ego and his first draft was perfect. The movie that you saw was like his first draft more or less. It's unbelievable. So, and then Leo came on and said once that happened, that was an unbelievable turning point in the movie in my life. Once Leo and they all came on board was announced publicly that it got bought out. So then

Random House immediately exercised an option for a second book. So I wrote this part two. to the book and then what happened was they had green lit the movie in 2007 then the writer strike hit and it got delayed for five or six years I was devastated at the time because I said oh my God oh my I tried to be the best thing ever because what happened was during those

five years I became wealthy again made back my money and started speaking and teaching sales around the world by the time the movie came back around Leo came to he goes what happened how did you get richie I told them and they changed the entire third act of the movie to have my comeback in there

the first very very who didn't have my comeback and had me ended up in jail so they ended up with me on stage speaking it was humble so it turned out to be this unbelievable thing i think the thing to learn from that is you could change your life story like while they were making it i changed my own life story you's never too like to change your story you put one foot in front of the other and work your ass off you know you were dangerous men and uh it's funny when i went to wikipedia you know i went to your website and stuff and not to embarrass you nothing like that it's not my style i'm just saying this because this is how i feel and i if you and i share a certain bond and it was that it said celebrity that's worth

minus yeah yeah 80 million dollars you're like minus 80 million but what life doesn't know is that's how you want it you've always been an underdog and you've made yourself a favorite In fact, the best work you do is when you're a fucking underdog You're like Joe Montana when Dallas came And the Dallas marched into San Francisco Giving a point in 82 Like we're gonna fuck up Joe Montana

And Joe Montana said bitch You're coming into my house You always live your life like it's your house I'm lucky to have a rich wife Really? She's rich She's my partner The partners

But she was rich before you met? No But partners Right I get what you're saying No, no, no, we're really partners. No, I know. She really started my business with me,

and she put her own money in to start the business, and she works me every day, and I'm very fortunate because she's brilliant. So we're partners, yeah. No, you're a lucky man. You're a bad motherfucker. I mean, when I read all that stuff, like I read about you at first,

somebody mentioned you somewhere, and I did not read your book. I've seen the movie three or four times, but I've not read the book. Now you're going to force me to read the fucking book. I think it's written in a way that you will. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You'll like it.

I love everything about you. Well, it's not, no, it's written in this voice and you like it. You know, it's the crazy thing about, anybody give you any shit? No. For what happened over those years with the, no. You did your time. Yeah. You did your thing.

And now you have, you look happy. Yeah, no, it's not like that. You don't really, you know, do you really believe what you read in the newspapers? You know better than that. No, no, no, no. It's all nonsense. I know when I got out at prison, I felt weird for a while. I felt weird.

You know, it's a couple of months there. That's what I'm trying to get from you. I'll tell you what it is. It's not that. I, in the beginning, when I first, when my life became public again, and they would say things about me that I stole this money, and it would make me feel bad inside. It would, because I'm a good person,

and I regretted doing what I did. And I got to a point, well, A, I've done so much good in the world in the last 10 years and helped so many millions of people. But that's not, it doesn't matter of it offsetting. But I saw it to realize that no one gives a fuck about it, except a few journalists. That's it. A few idiotic journalists. By the way, I appreciate the hating.

You know why? Because it makes me a lot of money, the haters. Because it increases my engagement online. So all you fucking hate is keep on hating me because you pour it on. Because what you start a conversation, my fans can react. And then it creates engagement and boom, it's awesome. So I don't resent it, but here's the thing. I made mistakes.

We all make mistakes. And, you know, it's what you do after you make mistakes. That's how you're defined. And I think I define my life in a very empowering way that, in a way that empowers many millions of people around the world. And probably more than hundreds of millions of people are empowered by my life. Story thanks to the movie and the work I do in terms of training and teaching people about entrepreneurship.

So I think that's the gift I give the world is that. The movie's funny. It's great. It's awesome. It's a great story for everyone. but the gift I give the world is the ability to understand that matter where you are in life it doesn't matter you can come back as long as you want to work hard learn strategy it's got to be strategy as well right yeah yeah you got to know what to do right but if if you won't everything

I move is strategy every fucking move I make every time I leave the fucking house it's thought out and it doesn't happen when people don't get that and of course I would whenever I see a successful person you would think that is it lock it's fucking strategy and hard work and hard work the intersection of that and a little bit of look and the harder I work the look here I get lucky you get there you go brother it's been a pleasure my it's been my pleasure I'd love to be my show as well I just thought that you would be great whenever you want I love you just fucking contact me and I go down there we'll speak we'll live on the beach you'll love it so we have what yeah I'm right on the ocean yeah you

I was just down in Huntington I took my family down there for 4th of July I'm in the Hat Beach close yeah and I you know I love it down there it makes you know Growing up in Jersey and New York, every impression you got a California is chicks on the beach with bikinis, and then you get here and you find yourself living in fucking Hollywood, and you never go to the fucking beach until one day you go, fuck this. I'm going to start to go to the beach more,

and that's what I've swore to do. And you've been an inspiration to me today. I think you are an inspiration to a lot of people, and I want people to know that second chance is a fucking real. You just got to do something with the fucking... There you go. Don't forget, you filthy fucks. I'll be at the D.C. Lincoln Theater, August 9th.

That's all I got for you right now. Go to the website. And that's it and that's that. Now for a word for our sponsors. Again, I want to thank Jordan Belfort for being a tremendous fucking guest. I want to thank the Christkiller. But most importantly, I want to thank you motherfuckers on a Monday morning because you're going to have the week of your goddamn life.

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Uncle Joey here. Stay black. Have a great fucking week. Kick this motherfucker mulee. A little something from me to you guys, all right? A little bit funny. This feeling inside. One of those who can easily hide.

I don't have much money, but boy, if I did, I'd buy a big house where we both could live. If I was a sculptor, but then again, know who makes potions and a lot. Travel and show I know it's not much but it's the best I can do My gift is my song

And this one's for you And you can tell everybody This is your song It may be quite simple but now that it's done I hope you don't mind I hope you don't mind that I put down in the world

how wonderful life is while you're in the world the mark of the verses well they've got me quite cross but the sun's been quite kind While I wrote this song It's for people like you that Keep it turned on

So excuse me forget But these things I do See, I've forgotten If they're green Or they're blue Anyway, the thing is What I really mean Those are the sweetest dies

The song that is done you don't mind while you're in