The Church of What's Happening Now: The New Testament - #712 - Eliza James

Episode Date: August 21, 2019

Eliza James, a professional violinist who has toured the world and performed with stars such as Kanye West and Taylor Hicks, joins Joey Diaz and Lee Syatt LIVE in studio. For the past 16+ years Eliza has been the featured solo violinist in Burt Bacharach's touring band and has held the same position in Paul Anka's touring band for more than 6 years. This podcast is brought to you by: Policy Genius - Policy Genius helps you compare and find the right home, auto, life or disability insurance for you. Check them out at www.policygenius.com    Onnit.com - Use Promo code CHURCH for a 10% discount at checkout.

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back guarantee and they don't even want the fucking product back. Who else does that? Nobody. So go to honor.com right now. Lee, kick this motherfucking mule. It's Wednesday morning, the 21st of motherfucking August. The day the devil was buried at sea. The sweetheart on the violin, Eliza James,

the Christ killer himself, and your uncle Joe, he had a month on a Wednesday afternoon. Oh shit. Little animal magnetism for you, motherfucker. Miss James. Hello. A pleasure to have you here.

Thank you for having me. Absolutely. A world-renowned violinist. When there's any fucking podcast, have any chance, and good looks to boot. Because usually those violinists are kind of fucked up looking

like a big eyes and shit. They're all warped in the shit, but you got all the goods. What's happened? Oh, I'm just been gigging in L.A. Just got back from tour. with Bert Baccarac. Oh, no, no.

You have a resume at that, but we'll get to that later. Are you originally from Southern California? No, I was born in England, actually. England. And where's the accent? I went away. I moved to the U.S. when I was really young. How old were you when you moved to the U.S.?

Um, pretty young. About a year old. Okay, and where'd you relocate you? Philadelphia. No shit. Stayed in Philly for a while? For a while, and then my dad, he's a doctor, and he got a job in Oklahoma.

So we moved there. When did you pick up the violin? When I was four. It's funny because I got interested in your videos and all of a sudden we started talking on Twitter, speaking on Twitter. And my daughter went to kindergarten last year and they signed her up.

She picked the violin. Oh, that's great. So they were like little cardboard violins and shit. That's awesome. And she loved it. I was going to have you over to come over one day and eat with us and play the violin for him blow her fucking mind but

at the recital the violin teacher got on her last nerve right because you know you went there like it's a fucking 8.30 recital right so parents got to leave you know like people got to move in this town by 10. 8.30

in the morning 8.30 in the morning so we go at 8.30 in the morning you know I'm all in I go to bed early I get up and she puts on a pretty dress and she's waiting to fucking play the violin with 80 other savages. And the violin teacher's like, well, hold on. First me and my husband have to do a duet

from my new album. I mean, you know, so she used the kids to promote her own bullshit. And it was the worst music in the world. The husband looked like a fucking cat that she just drug in. She looked like a bomb hitter. And they're up there in the morning.

And everybody was looking at each other, like, so fucking uncomfortable. We came here to see our kids play, and this dirty bitch is taking up their time. And then the kids did it like four minutes, and that was it. And Mercy was like, fuck that bitch. Like in the car that night.

She's like, I don't like her no more. She goes, she's a hog. She's a stagehog. She lured us down there to get an audience. For an album release. So she could do a fucking 20-minute fucking jam at 8.30 in the morning. I got no reefer in me.

I'm trying to be a decent dad. At least she filled me up with some refa. If you're going to let me know this fucking lady's on a play. So I don't know if she's signing up with this year. I think that was a little too traumatic. But so you picked up the violin and four. Yeah. When did you become serious about it?

I think I've always been serious about it. I was actually watching. I remember watching Sesame Street and seeing Itzak Pearlman on that episode and saying, Mommy, I want to do that. And I just walked around the house and pretended I was playing. And my parents were like, hmm, we should get a one of those. So, and I never, my parents never had to make me practice. I always wanted to play.

Did you, what were you doing at 12, 13? 12.13, I was playing in a college orchestra in Oklahoma. And I was part of a touring group called the Ottawa Suzuki Strings. And we went all over the world. And we were ambassadors for the U.S. And we played different schools, you know, for other kids, kind of like a sister's school program thing. And it was a lot of fun.

I got to travel, and I think that's where I got the travel bug. I was like, my first tour was when I was 11. I was like, all right, this is it. I'm done. I'm going on the road. Were you parrots on the tour with you? No, actually. They sent you away like one of Michael Jackson's kids.

Just take her with you. Fuck it. Don't worry about nothing. It's funny now because my mom, she said to me the other day, she was like, I don't know what I was thinking. I let my 11-year-old go to England by herself. But I was with other kids. How long were you away for?

Like a month on tour, and then I have relatives there, so. And then how was your high school? High school, I actually didn't go to conventional school. I was part of an educational co-op, and it was kind of set up like a college where you pick your classes, and you go to school only on the days that you have classes. And then you have a tutor that you can contact. And you have to be pretty self-sufficient. But you didn't go to like a musical high school. No.

They didn't really have one where I was. No shit. Yeah, so that's why I was in the college orchestra. And then where'd you go to college at? I went to Azusa Pacific out here. Okay, and that's where you tuned your shit up. Yeah. To meet a lot of contacts.

Yeah. Were you doing that high school to focus on music? Yeah. I was in, because I was doing college music classes. So I would do my high school, you know, math and science and all that stuff. the college music classes were on other days. But I actually moved to California when I was 15 and a half and was a nanny for my violent teacher.

So I finished high school out here. Now, one thing I dig about you is that you just don't play classical stuff. Right. Like your genre is hip-hop. Everywhere. You have a really good jazz bass. Like I was looking at some of your videos, like you do jazz. You know, I read something about you.

You like hip hop. Yeah. It's so weird, like a guy like me, an art's an art. The reason why I have you on the show today is to prove to people that artists appreciate each other. And we, you know, who would have think? Who would have thought that, yeah, you were attractive. And I looked at you. I watched you.

I watched you. I fell in love with you playing. I'm like, I wonder what her fucking path was like. You know, as a comic, you know, her path is dark, fucking ballrooms and bars and people throwing shit at you and hitting people in the head with microphones and shit. What was it like for you? For me, yeah, for me, the journey, I mean, I, if my mom listens to this, mom, I snuck out of the house and played with bands when I was 13. I used to climb out the window, and I played with this college band,

and they would sneak me into the club in the bass drum case, because I couldn't walk through the front door. So I would curl up in a ball in the bass drum case, and they'd carry me in, and I'd play with the band, and then they'd kick me out of the bar. So I always... You know, I always have loved music from every genre. So any chance I got, I was jamming with anyone, anyone who wanted to play.

And I used to practice on my front porch, you know, just to entertain my neighbors. You know, when I was a kid, what's his name, came out, what the devil came out of Georgia. Oh, yeah. Charlie Daniel. And that blew up the violin in our, like, we respected it as 13-year-olds. Like, we don't like that. Whoa. Yeah, like, whoa, that's cool.

And then he's fucking just a devil. went down to Georgia and all this shit. You know, today we don't have that. Nobody has introduced, like, to me, I learned everything early on. You know, I grew up in Manhattan. So our grammar schools would take us to, like, Lincoln Center to watch those dudes play all that shit,

and we would sit there like, what the fuck are we watching? But after a while, even though a knucklehead like me, saw that there was a certain type of beauty behind it. You know, whenever I go to Detroit, I get in the car and I go to, to the outside of Detroit, this is one bar. I can't remember the name of it now.

Monday nights, the fucking blues. Just, you know, six guys. I know in Burbank here on Monday nights, they get together at some bar. A friend of mine, Lenny Citrano, a bunch,

he's like, fucking, the guy from Zizi Top showed up last Monday. Yeah. I love all that shit. Like, that's what I live for. You know,

I love for just people popping in and, you know, you popping in with fucking slash. You know, like, how would that be? Yeah. And when did you go professional? Well, I started, I joined the union when I was 14. What unit is that?

So it was AFM. Okay. Yeah, American Federation of Musicians. Because I was playing, I was a sub for the Oklahoma Symphonia. And so I was, and Tulsa Philharmonic, and I was playing with them. So I guess that was, you know, I thought, oh, I'm professional now. You know, I'm getting paid. So there we go.

You know. Were you the youngest person in the orchestra? Yeah. That's pretty amazing. So it is amazing and it's not amazing. It's a lot of pressure when you're really young and you're around all these people. Yeah. Egos.

Big egos. Yeah. My wife worked at the L.A. Phil. Oh, cool. She did the accounting for the Hollywood Bowl and stuff. So, you know, I would always hear the stories of the fucking dude with the stick. What's his name? The conductor.

The conductor, yeah. The fucking whole thing and the egos. Yeah. And you can tell. It's from an ego-based society type of sorts. Yeah. I can't even imagine how some of the men looked at you or some of the women looked at you. Yeah, it's tough because, you know, it takes so long to get to that point where you are in an orchestra that's as good as Hollywood Bowl.

You know, you have to work so hard. for your whole life and beat out so many people. You know, you can have, if there's a chair open in L.A. Phil, you can have a thousand people trying to get one chair. And there's a joke that everybody, people say that, you know, in order to get into L.A. Phil, somebody has to die. Because nobody's going to give up their seat in L.A. Phil, or any big Philharmonic like that. So they literally will have that chair until they die. Would someone like you be attracted to that notion of working for the L.A. Phil? I would, I mean, it would be an honor to play in L.A. Phil. It's, I think I used to want to be

just that classical player, but as I got older, and I really love traveling and playing just different kinds of music, you know, just like playing with Burt and then going to a bar and, playing the blues and then playing Dvorzac, American String Quartet. You know, I like the variety of it. And I like, I like being in smaller groups, I think. Although there's absolutely nothing

that compares with like playing Beethoven's 9th with a symphony. Like being in the middle of everyone creating that, that sound and that feeling. That, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, that's beautiful to watch. There's nothing

like it. Now, the LA film, do they play? year round? They have a season. So it's L.A. Phil is, I believe, October through June. And then it overlaps a little bit with Hollywood Bowl. A lot of the L.A. Phil people also play in Hollywood Bowl. But yeah, they take the summer off pretty much. Now, what were your 20s like doing this stuff? I mean, lots of, lots of different bands, you know. Um, I mean, I was looking at names, some I recognized, some I didn't. But I seemed like Evelyn Champagne King.

Yeah. Like, what did you do for her? Oh, so that's a funny story, actually. Yeah, burning, keep my whole body yearning. That one, did you play a violin to that? Yeah, we did. No, you didn't. Yes.

I got this gig. And, you know, I'm freelance. So a lot of people, they'll call you and be like, hey, so we're doing this benefit or this party. can you are you available and like most times you know sometimes you've never played with the band before and they just give you charts and you go um this one was a benefit for like children's hospital in san diego and it was a 70s themed benefit and they said oh we're going to play the music of evelyn champagne king Gloria Gaynor you know and Anita ward and then i should thinking it was a cover gig. I show up and we're all in costumes and super fun. And then the real artist walked in the

room. I had no idea. It was the craziest thing. And I'm like, so how did you do ring my belt? We did. Well, we had, it was a huge band. We had keys and drums and, and we had synth strings. But I was the only actual real violinist on the gig. And so thinking before, oh, it's a cover gig, you know, gave me the charts, but then once the real artist walked in, I was like, oh, my God, I have to go practice right now. But they were super nice. Everyone was really gracious. I think Shaka Khan was there, too.

Yeah. That's crazy. Yeah. And so you accompanied them with the violin to all those disco heads. Yep. That must give it a tremendous different sound. Oh, it does. I mean, disco music is built on the strings.

Disco strings are amazing. So it's crazy The other night I was watching the Saturday When I was on I was getting ready To go to the comedy store And I caught like the last

30 minutes You're a bum You're never gonna be somebody And he's like fuck you I could dance And he goes down there And you know He's doing that whole fucking thing

And I still remember Walking to the movie theater To see that And walking home Going holy fuck Yeah That's crazy I gotta start wearing shoes

But now How did you hook up with Bert Backrack and Paul Anka, who was first? Bert was first. Bert was first. How old is Bert now? He is 91.

God bless that motherfucker. Yeah. He is amazing. And how old is Paul Anka? He just turned 78. How good does he look? Oh my God. He looks amazing.

Now, what's really crazy about what we're about to discuss is that pretty much, I got to assume, that maybe 30% of the people who listen to this podcast because of the their age. Yeah. Not because of any, do not know who Bert Backrack and Paul Ankar. Who did you make contact with first? I was actually contacted.

I went to a show of Bert's and I met his music director and he introduced me to him and, you know, just introduced me to the band, just hanging out. I was doing a recording project for the music director. And then I went to a couple more. more shows and then I got a call and it was Bert and he said hey so I'm down at the studio on sunset and I have this violin part you know can you come down and listen to it I was like what okay sure so I went down to the studio and listened to the violin part it was off the album who are these people I believe is the name of the album it was a it was a instrumental one of

Grammy for Best Instrumental. But I had never heard it before, and he played it for me. And I was like, wow, that's a beautiful violin solo, of course. And he said, yes, so you're free in October? You want to do Vegas? And that was it. For people who don't know, I mean, Bert Backwreckers won Academy Awards for the Grammys. I mean, he's just, his resume, you know, this is 60 years in the business, maybe 70.

Yeah. Yeah, maybe 70. If he's 91, you gotta assume he's like you, he's been doing this since he was 15 or fucking 12 or something. Yeah. And that's just true. He's written music for fucking everybody. For everyone. For everybody.

Yeah. Like, he's written for over a thousand fucking musicians, over a thousand have trusted him, Bert back right? That's how strong he is. Yeah. But then how did you meet Paul Anka? How long were you working for Bert before you met Paul? So I've been in Burt's band for 16 years. No shit.

Saying that out loud. I'm saying so long. Oh, my gosh. Yeah, 16 years. So you've been with Burt for 16. Now, how is Paul fit into the equation? I have been in Paul's band for six and a half years now. So I just got a call.

His music director, I was recommended to him. and they were doing some kind of beta testing for a hologram. And he needed another violinist. So he said, hey, can you come? And we basically played my way for two days straight in a pit while they like beta tested this hologram. I never even saw it. I think it was a Frank Sinatra hologram. And then so I did that.

And only played one song. But the band was so cool. Everybody in the group was great. And then, like, a couple days later, they were like, you want to go to Singapore for New Year's? And then I was it, you know? So here you are. You're in Bert's band for 10 years.

16 years. 10 years, yeah. 10 at the time. And now Paul Anka is calling you up. Yeah. Describe to the audience who the fuck Paul Anka is. Paul Anka is. one of the earliest real pop stars.

14. 14. In Canada. In Canada. Yeah, he started writing, I think when he was 12, he wrote Diana. And he is one of the most driven and dedicated people. You will never find anyone that works harder than either of my bosses. But, you know, Paul, he knew what he wanted.

and he had the package, he put it together. He understood really early on what it was to appeal to your audience. He had a good read for that, and he still does. He knows exactly how to work the audience. And he started touring with a group like Annette Finicello, and they would pile in these buses and go all over the country and, you know, go to these radio shows that they used to do back then, and then everybody would, you know, Buddy Holly was on it

and they would sing a couple songs and then get on the bus and go to the next one and, you know, work their way around the country. So, you know, he was definitely, I would say, comparing now, we don't really have any pop stars like that. Maybe Justin Timberlake would be the closest, you know, that level of. of dedication and talent to the craft.

What was his connection to Frank? He wrote something for Frank. I know he did something big for Frank. He wrote a couple things for Frank. He wrote, well, he wrote the lyrics to My Way. You know, that little song, just a little ditty. Yeah. He wrote the lyrics to my way,

and he also wrote another hit for Frank, let me try again. when he came back. He left show business for a while and then he came back and he premiered it at Madison Square Garden. But he was working with, I mean, he was super young. He was probably like 21

when he started working with the Rat Pack in Vegas. So he wrote for Sammy Davis Jr. Yeah, he's... Like he, I read different books and I think it was a Dean Martin book I read when I was locked up. He was like the time

big guy. Like Dean described him like he would say little things to you that would change everything. Like dog, don't wear now on shine your shoes or say this at the end of this song or like he

just knew how to tweak things to make him fucking perfect. Like everybody took his advice from Frank to Michael Jackson. Oh yeah. The fucking everybody was with Paul Anker. Like, hey, Paul Anka had a hook in everybody

at some way or another. If you knew anything about music, you just wanted him to just watch you one time and go, maybe you should do this. Yeah. Maybe you should look this way instead of that one. You're like, what? And all of a sudden you're like, oh my God. Like, that's the impression I get

of Paul helped everybody. Yeah, he is very observant. Like something with John Lennon? Was it something? Somebody, like a fucking crazy guy, I was quoting Paul Anken once. I was like, this is crazy. Like, Jimmy Pay.

I don't know who it was, some rock star, maybe Elvis. Yeah, Elvis. Elvis. Yeah. It's crazy. So was he a songwriter or what? He will, P.A. We call him P.A.

P.A. was, he's a songwriter. He's a performer. He's, he's everything. He does everything. He can sing. He can sing. His voice now is so. It's amazing.

It's really amazing. You guys got to come to his show. So for the last 16 years, you know, they just had a thing about Fredo out last week. Remember Fredo called Cuomo? Yeah. But regardless of this, I don't know if you know this about the guy who played Fredo,

he did five movies. Everything he played in won an Academy Award. Oh, wow. The Hunter, Godfather 2, Godfather 1. Wow. Like all five of his movies. If you look him up, whoever played Fredo, that dude, you know, they did a documentary on him.

Oh, dog day afternoon. Oh, yeah. He played the whatever when he asked him. Where do you want to go when we steal the bank, when we robbed the bank? They did a documentary on him. You know, everything he touched turned to fucking gold. He did five movies that were fucking like Academy Award winners or some shit, you know. So, Leightonero was his buddy.

Yeah. Pacino was his buddy. His name was John Cazali? John Cossali. Let's see if I can find out what he did here. Oh, my God. He did a couple of TV things, but then the Godfather, the conversation, The Godfather Part 2, Dog Day Afternoon, and The Dehunter.

Wow. He won five. That's quite a resume there. That's all he did. He had a knack for that. But my point. is how is it how does it feel to be around two great it's like the education you're getting oh it's amazing remember sunny and in fucking bronx tale he's like you're getting a street education and you're

getting a book education yeah you are getting an education that most people can't even fat yeah it's and i'm very glad that i realized that early right away you know because sometimes you get a You're like, oh, this is cool. And it's more than cool. You know, playing for these guys is more than cool. I've learned so much about not just music, but about how to be, how to act on stage, how to present yourself, you know. How to work in an audience. You know, working a crowd is an art.

I mean, you know, you do it all the time. And it's an art. And sometimes you'll get an audience that they just, we call them the too rich to clap. You know? And they'll do a benefit or something. And they're just like sitting there and drinking their wine. And you hear the, you know, the forks clinking on the plates. And they're like, oh, that's so great.

You know, we pay, we had the beach boys here last week. This is so cool. And, you know, they don't really, they pay for these big performers to come in. but it's, they do it so often, it's like nothing. And, but Paul Anka can take that audience and have them on their feet in three minutes. How does he do it? He, he works this magic. He runs through the crowd.

He involves them in, he'll, you know, say, start singing, stay with me. And then put the mic to somebody's mouth and they'll be like, Diana. So it's interactive, you know, the, all of the whole show is meticulous. particularly put together, you know, the energy levels at certain places. And he's off the cuff. Like, he's really funny. So people will yell things. You know, the other day, she was like, I love you, Paul.

He's like, I'll see you backstage after the show. You know? So he, I think people when they come to the Anka show, they feel like they're in their own living room. Sometimes they heckle a little too much. They get really into it. But um... Like in Vegas? Yeah.

Okay. We've had some, we did a show in, actually it was in Santiago, Chile, and it was in this giant arena. And he hadn't been to South America in quite some time. And packed. And he runs through the audience at the beginning of the show. And we underestimated how excited this audience was. There, he told me this story after the show. There was this woman who was so excited.

in front of him and you know the general age of the people who know who Paul Anka is but you know she was so excited she was standing in front of him and she started to say something and her teeth fell out just fell out right in front of PA and he was just standing there he's like I didn't know what to do there was just teeth on the floor I'm not going to pick him up what's the average age of shows it 50 to 70 yeah I would say 50 to 70 With Bert, it's kind of, it varies. It varies. It also varies country to country.

You know, with Bert, he's huge everywhere. And so is Anka, but it's, I think that in England, in the UK, especially, like, there's such an incredible fan base for Bert there. I mean, we just got back from there. And the audience sings louder than we play, you know. But it varies There's kids that That love Anka And they send me

Instagram videos of them singing Having my baby Yeah He sang that or he wrote that Both He sang that Yeah What do you sing

That was like the big How I got to know Anka I had to be like Nine or Ten I sing that with him In the show now No you don't

You sing too? Yeah Oh wow So yeah Does he still do that live We aren't Well, right now we're doing anka-sing Sinatra show that's a little bit different than our regular show, but in the regular show we do it. And if somebody yells out, having my baby, he'll do a little bit of it, you know.

No shit. Sometimes the audience will say, having my baby, he'll be like, I hope not. You know, it's so weird how at one point in comedy for you to get stronger as a comic. Like, oh, you are as a violinist or as a performer. Let's use the word performer. Yeah. You have to watch everything. Like, I tell people all the time, when I'm on stage in the back of my mind, it's prior, it's Robert Plant.

I love his body movements on stage. He underlined his words with his body on stage. on stage when you watch Robert Plant he underlines his words with his body uh Rod Stewart I love live

you know Mick Jagger you know oh amazing there's certain people that you have to watch you know when I watch you did a video the other day of Elton John like a tribute oh yeah

and it was just all these people moving and you know I watch all that that's what makes a performer Yeah, I'm a comedian, but that means I could go on stage and just tell jokes. That's going to take me so far. Right. The next part, the next phase of that is becoming a performer. And learning how to use your body to control the audience.

Yes, exactly. All that goes into it, you know. I love watching Leonard Skinner Live from Oakland, 1977, how that little chubby dude controls the audience with his body. All this goes, I tell people all this. So I'm B.B. King live in Africa. Jesus, he's there. Like, he's saying the words and he's there. Like, he's telling this bitch, it's over.

What's that song he sings? The really good BB King. The thrill is gone. The thrill is gone. Watch it live from Africa. In front of him is that woman. And he's telling her, like, it's fucking over. Then he hits the guitar.

I'm throwing you out, bitch. And he hits the guitar again. As to become a good performer, you have to study a, all those guys. He do. And even like anchor, anchor dress is nice. Mm-hmm.

You know? And he comes on. It's like he's on roller skates, but you don't see him. Right. It's really smooth. Yeah. He's smooth.

So when I watch the anchor, I'm like, look at Sinatra. Yeah. Even Sinatra at the end with the twisted wig and the fucking, the teleprompter.

He was still fucking up the words. Sinatra was such a Sinatra. At the end, at the end, and they had to telepromp, and he'd be singing my way. Like, let's do fly me to the moon with my way lyrics. You know what I'm saying? Oh, my God.

It's interesting that you said that because we had Bruce Buffer in here, and he's not a musician. He's the voice of the UFC. And he did his announcing, and I was sitting next to him, and it, like, it honestly felt like a bomb went off. Like, just the energy that came off of him. So, like, you were saying, like, the energy, like, with a, with a like a orchestra. Like, do you feel that when you're in,

when you're in the middle of it? Like, it's kind of vibrating. It was kind of crazy. Yeah, you feel it. And you're completely surrounded by it, you know? And it's really special. And that, I think that's the mark of any really good performer. When they're in the moment, like, you can, the energy is palpable.

You know, when you're really going for it and drawing the audience. And the audience also gives you energy. The audience, you know? It's a two-way street. You can't, if you have a dead audience that won't react to anything, then it drains you because you're working and you're trying to drag it out of them, drag it out of them. And yeah, but when you have that audience

that just is really excited to be there and, you know, want, it knows the songs and they sing along, I can't, what I would love, one thing that I would love on my bucket, is to have the experience that Bert had when we were in England and the audience was singing along. Just the look on his face, the joy, knowing that not expecting anything when you walk out onto the stage, but then realizing that you have impacted all of these people's lives, like that person over there got married to your song.

that person over there named their baby after your song. And then having everyone sing along and that exchange of energy, that was probably one of the most incredible moments. You know, those are. That's the level that you want to get there. That's the, I would just, I would love to have one song. I'm not saying I have to write a thousand songs because, you know, I'm not Bert Bacharach, but I would love to have one song and just have that experience.

I think that would be incredible. That they would sing that song together. with you. I would hate to do it as a comic. That means you're not writing material. But as a, yeah, like, you know, when you go see Stairway to heaven, it's like an anthem. Yeah. When you, that would be amazing to have an anthem in your career.

Yeah. For Paul, how many pho? How many pho? Oh, my God. Jesus Christ. So many. Jesus. I'm trying to think of somebody else.

I read a bunch of books when I was locked up. And I kept hearing his name. And I knew him as like, it's like, you know, when I was growing up, there was this weird vibe of, from 70 to 73 music was, we had great music. Yeah. But there was this undercarrying. There was Leo Sayer. Remember Leo Sayer?

And I don't want to go home. You had the captain and Teneal. You had that genre. And that's about the time. I think Paul came out with having my baby, maybe 73. Yeah, I think it was around there. And that's what I knew about Paul. And I was young kid, but having my baby, fucking pretty cool.

You know, like, it was just a song that caught on. And now, like, you know, I read that he, you know, Michael Jack. There was somebody else he worked with that blew my fucking mind. He's worked with Boubley. He helped start Michael Bubla's career. Michael Bluebley. And there was somebody else. Like, he's just little, but we were getting back to the back rack that you were saying, people

saying their songs. It's 60. 70 years of experience. Yeah. You can't take that away. No, it's, it. You can't take that away from people. No.

You can't. That's why now, like, at the 18-year mark of comedy, I had doubts. I still have doubts. But I'm in the twin, like, when I have doubts now, I go, Joey, you've been doing this in 20 years. Get your pussy ass together. Get down to the comedy store and get on stage. You're fucking tired.

You're fucking pussy. Because I don't have material. Well, 28 years, you don't have fucking material. You don't have nothing to say after 28 fucking years. Getting that shower, wash your pussy, and get in that car and get out of Laurel Canyon. You know, I have to say that to myself sometimes. Yeah. But that experience you can't take away.

I'm very proud. Yeah. But I slept on Graham buses because now I see it. Right. I see it when I'm on stage. I see it when I turn and when I do certain things. Like, oh, I remember this doing this in Charlotte. it that night.

I was eating a bag of dicks in front of that black audience. You know, it all comes back to you. So that's something that you're having a shortcut. You're in a beautiful position. You're in a beautiful position to have that hit if you really think about it. Because you have all the tools around you. Yeah. You have the right guidance.

You could go to PA and go PA. I'm thinking of a song I want to write, you know. Yeah. Having a baby's daddy. You know what I'm saying? Having a baby's daddy. daddy what a little way to say how much you hate me having a baby's daddy you know and you could have the support so yeah if this was the time for you to do what a great thing like just to write a

song and give it to somebody like one of the greatest stories i've heard was that elton john called john lennon i said what the fuck you wrote fame for david bowie and he goes yeah what's the problem He goes, what the water am I? Chop liver. The child liver goes, give me a couple days, bitch. And he called him back with Benny and the Jets. Wow.

That's, to me, is better than having your own hit. Like, hold on, give me a couple days. He's Benny and the fucking Jets for you. Get the fuck out of here with those fucking faggy glasses on and shit. Before I smack it. Before I have Yoko Karate Chalkya. But I love that shit. But that's a big honor, too.

There's a huge fucking honor. To have your peer at that level write a song for you, specifically for you, thinking of you. Like, it's not just a song that's going to be like shopped around and then go to, you know, maybe this, a country artist will cover it at some point. You know, it's a song that was written specifically for him. That's it.

That's a huge, that's a huge honor. Give me one minute. And now for a word from my sponsor, The church of what's happening now is sponsored by PolicyGenius. These days, a lot of jobs offer some pretty nice perks. Snacks, 15 flavors of soda water, even life insurance. But while it's nice to have those perks, you can't feed your family with flavored water and trail mix. Uncle Joey's here to tell you, neither is your workplace life insurance.

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What I was going to ask you was, like, I can't even imagine being. It would be like being around John Mullaney and Dave Chappelle, either or a week. Like one week I'm opening for John Mullaney and looking at that perspective of it. And the other week I'm opening up, It had to be somebody who was even longer in the game than Dave Chappelle,

like someone's in the game. Dom Herrera, 40 years, you know, out of Philly. Just, it's not even, it's looking how they walk, looking how they talk, looking how they go on stage. Wow, they shine their shoes before they go on stage. Isn't that interesting? Orlanca does a workout before he goes on stage, you know? The ritual.

The ritual. You learn the rituals of different people, And then you compare them and you come up with your own ritual, you know. Your eyes must be, you know, you could tell stories that nobody's even comprehends. Oh, yeah. It's something that you learn just by being around them, but you really do have to pay attention. You know, you can't get all swept up in the, oh, it's cool to be on tour. Now, you know what?

sometimes you learn the most when you're you're sitting next to someone at dinner and they're just talking about okay well you know I think what do you think about this part of the show should we do should we tweak it for this what's this audience like and and the questions that they ask the band you know to find out how how we think as well because I think that as a unit you know we all have played together for six and a half years now in Anka's band and we don't really we rehearse sometimes you know we'll we'll have a sound check but we don't really rehearse we don't have to you don't rehearse during the week like there's no wednesday night somewhere no oh there have i think twice maybe you know but everybody's pro everybody knows the music and but pa is always trying

to make the show better. Even when you're like, the show couldn't be better than this. How are you going to make it better than this? He's always trying to make it better. We missed each other in Boston. Yeah. Connecticut. And I couldn't get out early enough.

And you couldn't get out early enough. We couldn't make each other's shows. Yeah. But when you showed me the place, like, I was blown the fuck away. Oh, yeah. I'm like, Anchor's selling some numbers. Was that Anka? That was Enca.

That was Enca. That was Enca. That was Enca. That was Mohican son, right? That was Mohican son. Yeah. That was Mohican. That was Anchor, yeah.

Anchor still fucking kill him. Oh, yeah. How much does Anchor travel during the week? PA. During the year, how many weeks does he do? We do, like, let's see. We do like a, I think it averages out to about a week a month, maybe two weeks a month. Throughout the year.

It depends. It changes. We used to tour a little bit more than we do now. Like, we did a month in Europe. up, we're going to probably do a month in Australia, New Zealand in the spring. And we've got, mostly it's weekend dates for now. So when you go out with Mr. Backwreck, how many nights do you do in a week? We usually do, we don't do more than two in a row.

Okay. Yeah. No, your body can't take it. Yeah. And it's, you know, we also travel with three singers. So it's, and it's pretty taxing. The show is difficult for everyone. It doesn't sound difficult because we make it sound easy.

But I know the singers, there's a lot of pressure. You know, these songs are iconic. How many people all together in the band, Bird's Band? Let's start with. Birds Band, so me on violin. Then we have two keyboard players. who both also sing, and then bass, drums, Burt's on piano, three singers.

Am I missing anyone? And then Bert's son Oliver plays with us as well on a couple tunes. And then we have two, we have a guy who does woodwinds, sax, flute, clarinet, and then a trumpet player. So you got about 12 guys.

12 people altogether. And then what about Bert's orchestra? Or Anka's orchestra? Ancas is way bigger. Bigger. That's what I said. Yeah, because we do a lot of big band stuff. And especially now because we're doing the Sinatra show.

So there are, we pick up horns in different cities. You know, we have the West Coast horns. And then we have the East Coast horns. But our lead trumpet player is always the same. So the touring band, the core band is guitar, bass, drums, percussion, me, synths, piano, and then our music director, John Cross, he does sax and clarinet, he's the woodman guy, and then we have a trombone player and usually we travel with two trumpet players, so that's 12. Did I count that right? I think. But we also add people. So,

like sometimes we'll have four trumpet players three trombones and you know extra we're talking about 22 people yeah plus we travel with anchor we travel with a lot of crew this is what's always this is why i've always had respect for bands like when a band comes and go like oh this band is great you have to leave i always go good get me on the next album yeah hit me on the third album when people get mad at me. Well, you're not giving them a chance because I've been down the street before. I respect Zeppelin because they had nine albums. Yeah. I respect the stone because they got 50 fucking albums. Yeah. And for anybody who knows, when I get on stage, I'm responsible for one person, my action. When they don't laugh, I suck the bag of dicks. No two ways about it. It wasn't the

audience. Not that they're old. It wasn't to fall in the sleep. It wasn't too late. They weren't tired. I ate the bag of dicks. Right. When you're in a band like that, all 22 people have to be having a good night. Yep. Like, that's always... Everybody in the band has to smoke the same shit. We all got us through the same CBD off.

Yeah. We all have to be connected in some way. And that's what I really always take my hats off to bands. You know, Aerosmith. You know, they were on heroin, fucking went to rehab, hated each other, and then made it work, the Eagles. but people just have no idea

what it's like to travel with guns and roses a year Vince Neil and Motley crew a fucking year you don't come home for a fucking year with four smelly fucks talking about the same shit

every fucking day rehearsing eating pussy doing heroin it gets old you know what I can't wait to be in a band and get chlamydia and go out But do it for 18 months

And the record label's haunting you That they want new music And you're too busy snorting coke And you know You have to five people have to be in tune And that's why you guys have And forget about your world Yeah

You know when I used to go to the LA Phil For the jazz series I look at and count 40 motherfuckers up on the stage Oh yeah 20 motherfuckers doing this 20 motherfuckers doing this all You know and you're like Oh my God that's

It's like watching synchronized swimming. Yeah, exactly. It's just a beautiful fucking thing. How do you feel when you're up there and you're a part of that? It's amazing. There's nothing that I can really even compare it to except that to be, when you know that your contribution is important to creating this beautiful piece of music, you know, without you, it wouldn't be the same.

So you feel this sort of sense. ownership of it, even though it's not your own music. You know, you feel like, look, I have to be the best that I can be because the way I am is going to affect the person next to me. So I have whatever I'm feeling, if I'm tired, if I, you know, am stressed out, whatever it is, that all has to go away. You have to be like, oh, you know, maybe you just find out that your dog is dying before you go on stage, you have to ignore that. You can't bring that to the audience. The audience is there to have a good time, to see, you know, a show, and your dog could be dying, and no one should ever know. You know, it's, but it's, it's challenging, but it's so rewarding to me.

You know, and then when I'm offstage, then I'm like, okay, back to my dying dog kind of thing, you know? Yeah. Paying people to do your dishes. Paying people to do my dishes. What did you bring me? I know you brought me a little present. I brought you. I brought you something to look at. And that thing looks like it's been through fucking war. It has. I have taped it back together. Oh my God.

This is my music from Burt Backerack show. Yeah. Do you mind if I read this? Yeah, sure. So this is the UCLA set list? The UCLA set list. Yeah. That was, I think, last year. So one, two, three, four, five.

But then see where it says, like, record medley one. Right. So, how it's a day now and friends. Record medley one is don't make me over. Walk on by. Reach out for me. That's right. You work for Dionne Warwick, too.

Yeah. That's right. This guy's in love. I say a little prayer. Now, who sang I said a little prayer for you? Forever and ever. I think it was Dion. Dion.

Dion also? Yeah, I think it was Deon, yeah. So he, Bert wrote those for Dionne Warwick. Tell me he wrote, do you know the way to San Jose? He did. And I'll jump off this fucking table. He did. And he wrote, do you know the way to San Jose?

Yeah. And then we have trains and boats and planes. That was the oldest joke when I got to L.A. Yeah? Everybody was doing that joke. Oh, yeah. Everybody says that. Because he was working for the psychic center.

Oh, that's right. Do you remember? I remember those. So, 97, every fucking joke had, Dionne Warwick. Do you know the way to San Jose, but you're a fuck. fucking psychic name. That was like everybody had a similar. I forgot that he did all that writing for Dionne.

Yeah. And he wrote, the one that I find that the youngest people, because I always say, people will say, oh, I don't know who Bert Backrack is. Like I was talking to my Uber driver the other day, and he asked me because I had my instrument. And I was like, yeah, I play for Burr Backrack. And he's like, I don't know who that is.

And I was like, yes, he do. You know who that is. You know that song always something. there to remind me from the 80s that's Bert Bacharach I didn't even know that yeah it's bugging me there's a movie where someone goes coming to the stage Bert back around and I can't play some powers me okay yeah all right I and now introducing Mr. Bert backerack and then he's on the bus yeah I couldn't I could I don't I don't know it's distinct I was like I know I've heard it yeah oh this is why I wanted you to come on because I wanted to educate people I'm

You, you're beautiful, what you do is tremendous. We're not even going to have a close in the song. I wish you would play a little violin for us on the way out. Okay. Tonight, I think that would be appropriate. Fuck Tony Bennett. Listen to Tony Bennett. Let's listen to a little Eliza, Eliza James.

Yeah. James, James, yes. Do you have, because you're talking about, like, people having to be in sync, but what about, I'm sure you must have an extra, but have you had a violin break or something crazy like that? How like stuff must have them break? Do chords ever like guitars? Yeah.

Yeah, the strings definitely break. They, um, I was in my college audition. I, before I decided I was going to stay in California. I auditioned for Cleveland Institute of Music. And I think I may, I like the sunshine better. So I stayed here. Um, but I was in the middle of my audition and the president of the university is sitting there. And, you know, classical.

auditions are very stressful and there are people who judge them are very, very judgy. And, you know, I was 17, I think. And I'm in the middle of this Bach piece and my e-string breaks

right by the bridge so close to my face, flips up, hits me in the nose, and my nose starts bleeding. And I'm just like, go to the other string. I just go and start and the, and I try. I'm like trying to play this E major partita on way up here in the A string and it's not really working.

And the president of the university was like, it's okay, you can stop. Don't bleed on your instrument. But yeah, it's, I've had, I've had, we were, I was out with Bert. We were in Australia. And, you know, traveling with instruments on airlines is, it's horrible. and I had actually a bigger violin case than I do now and so every time I would get in line oh that doesn't fit me overhead oh that doesn't I'm like

do you know how many flights this has been on like I got it to Australia somehow so clearly it fits in some overhead not that one this not it was a different case so they it was Qantas and they were just you know sometimes flight attendants are having a really bad day and they just want to make it your bad day. And the guy, he was like, you can't bring that on. You have too many things. I had a suitcase and a violin.

That's it. And so he makes me check the suitcase and then takes my laptop. They won't let me hold the laptop in my lap while we take off. And they're like, you have to put that in the overhead. So my laptop's bouncing around in the overhead. I'm like, great. This is starting off well. And I said, don't put it on my violin case.

What do they do? you put it right on top of my violent case it bounces during takeoff snaps my bridge in half and I had a panic attack like when I got to the hotel I opened the case and the bridge was snapped and half it could have cracked the entire

instrument and ruined the instrument my my instrument his name is Jacques and he's almost a hundred years old and you know you can't it's irreplaceable you can't just make a number another one. And so that was pretty awful. I would say that's the worst. That's the worst disaster I've ever had. How many violins do you have? I have, Jacques over here, and I have, I'm endorsed by a company called NS Design, and they make these really cool electric violins.

My string quartet, quartet 405, were all endorsed by them. That's why I saw all yesterday. Yeah. Yeah, that's the Elton John video. On the Twitter page. Yeah. Yeah. We We have a lot of fun. That was great. We're doing another one. We're doing a music video. The 27th though, right? Yeah.

We just got a, our former violist, Lila, she moved to Nashville to work on some projects there. So we got a new violist. Her name's Jana Chow, and she's amazing. And we're doing a tribute to Paul Anka. She wrote an arrangement, and we're going to have a backyard party and shoot a music video. I got to ask you something. I don't seem to be off color here. why did I see so many Asian violinists for so long and then I saw your beautiful face?

Well, I think that it comes from... Is it big in Asian violin? Yeah, it's huge. And I think that a lot of Asian cultures are very, they're very disciplined. You know, there's a, there's a method called the Suzuki method, which I learned when I was a kid. It's for, actually your daughter may have... I don't know. Do you know what she was? Was it a cardboard.

Yeah, because that's something that Suzuki does. That's how it starts. Yeah. Did she play that. Da-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na. Yes, yes, yes. Mississippi hot dog. Yeah.

That's what we called it. But yeah, that's Suzuki method. And that was started during World War II by a guy, Dr. Suzuki in Japan. And he was the first person to make child-sized violins. Because up until then, you couldn't really play. music as a child, the violin didn't, there wasn't really smaller ones. So he started a factory that would produce child-sized violins. And so it came from Japan and then just spread. But it was funny. I remember as a kid, I was in a group class and all of the, all of the students were

Asian except for me. And so I went home and I asked my mom, like a five-year-old, I was like, Mommy, can I change my last name to Chang? And she was like, what? And I said, yeah, I think it'll make me play better. My last name is Chang. I think I'll play violin better. So, you know, it's, I think it's also, it's a, the parents are super involved with their kids. They come to all the lessons.

It's a method. It's a way of learning instruments. And it's not just violin, it's violin, cello. Viola. They have a Suzuki piano, but it's not as, it's not done as often. There's harp. I think there's even guitar, flute. But it's a really good method for kids to learn.

What's the done between a viola and a violin? A viola is, like, you know, in a choir, you have the soprano, alto, tenor bass. Like, sopranos are the highest voice. So that's the violin voice. the alto voice is the viola voice. And then you have the tenor, which is cello, and then bass, which is upright bass. So it's the range of the instrument,

and the instrument itself is bigger. So it has, because it has lower strings. So the body of it has to be bigger in order to make the vibrations. I was having a good time to you brought out this music. I got depressed because I always wish I learned how to read music. This was my first. fashion. And because

I was a loser, I quit. And I became a comic because I knew that I would pawn my guitar if I, with my drug problem. And looking at this music makes me so fucking depressed right now. I want to shoot myself. I want to go to a guitar set and buy a guitar.

Do it. But I can't because I have an addictive personality. If I started playing the guitar, I'd be in this office from 9 in the morning till 12. Listen to Pink Floyd dogs. learning how to do the guitar solo, the dogs. And I would leave my wife, not forget about my kid,

because I know I have that passion for it. So it's all like my cousins in Cuba, they're the national band of Cuba. Oh, wow. My cousin's Emmy Alfonso and all band. Oh, my gosh. The whole family's playing congas and violins and the whole fucking thing. So, you know, this was my, this is what's in my DNA.

Yeah. I just was too much of a pussy to, go for it. I knew that, you know, I started with the bass and then I quit and then I figured I'd get into the guitar later on and just as I was getting close, I had a drug problem and I go, you know what, I'm not that stupid. If I pay 300 for a guitar, every time I fiend, I'm going to pawn the guitar. This guitar is going to be in and out of porn shops, so I never really had a chance to really get involved. So you go to a slow route, you become a comedian because you don't even need a microphone. All you need is a wall and three idiots to listen to, you know.

So. Well, you could always learn violin and with your daughter. Yeah. Let's see if she wants. I'm going to talk to her today. Talk to her. I'm going to talk to it tonight and see where we stand with the violin or any other. Yeah, because you know what?

I find that with kids, like, the most important job that you have as a teacher is to inspire. That's what you're there for. You're in, you're telling, you're teaching them things. You know, this is how you play this. But the most important thing is to inspire them to then go and teach themselves. You know, you always, I always think that if the student is better than the teacher, then you've succeeded. So, you know, it could be. And the Suzuki method, when I, I used to teach a lot before I started touring.

And I would have parents up to a certain age. Like if they were 13 years old, they didn't have to have their parents. in the lesson. But, you know, it's really helpful, parents writing down notes, interacting. Some parents would, they'd rent a violin and they'd learn alongside their kid. And when the kid sees mom or dad's doing it, oh, it's cool now. You know, now I'm not just alone in a room by myself trying to learn music. I, you know, when I was little, I used to, my dad would come home from work and I put on concerts. We'd have dinner concerts.

So I think if you involve the whole process of learning, if your kid sees that you're doing it, it's going to inspire them too. A word of encouragement. I can't see myself doing Chikowsky right now with this fucking A. Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. Whatever that is. But I love it.

Yeah. I love the power of it. Like I've always loved the power. Like I just went to see something I took them to see something Oh, we went to Radio City Oh yeah, we went to see a Christmas shop Oh nice And the band came up and I was like Jesus Christ

The fucking energy That's what I want to ask you real quick For comedy When you're in a theater After it's When you're in a comedy club It's a game of ping pong But when you're in a theater

the energy flow in a theater for a comedian is two senior citizens playing tennis. I hit the ball, the ball bounces, the energy goes up until the rafters, they receive the energy, and the laughter comes back at you. So it's a ping pong of energy. In a smaller room, it's a ping pong.

Yeah. In a 1,200-seat theater, it's tennis. How does it feel as a musician and a big is that the same energy you're receiving? It is in a way, yeah. It's you,

especially when you can't see the audience. I love that. Yeah. You don't like seeing them either? It depends. It's kind of funny. When I'm out with Anka or Burt and I know that I have family

or friends in the audience, I like to see them because I'm excited. But if I'm playing, you know, if I'm doing like a classical solo and I have any amount of nervousness, I don't even want to know that you're there. If I know you, I don't want to know that you're there. Don't make me, you know, it's easier for me to play for strangers. But when I can see, we can usually see like the first couple rows. Right. I like, I don't mind seeing the, I mean, I got to see the first.

And now something that's really gets kind of frustrating is, and I don't mind it. Anka doesn't mind when people take video or photos during the show. But sometimes, I don't know if you've had this happen, what is with the iPads? Why are you bringing your giant freaking computer-sized iPad to a show on full brightness and holding it up over your head video? I don't understand it because I can see from the stage that the person in the third to last row of this 1200 seat theater is FaceTiming someone I can see the face of the person on the iPad because of the way that it's lit up and So cheap that me. I'm to the point that that that is distracting

So I'm to the point where there's a bunch of comedians that are putting phones away because they say phones it distracting and the da-da-da-da-ta-ta it might ring and it's certain comics to be cool and otherwise it jumped on the bandwagon yeah i'm thinking you're doing it because i'm sick and tired of going online every night and seeing you know the stones are playing Thursday wake up Friday morning there's a thousand videos of the stones yeah why are you taking video why aren't you living your fucking life. Yeah. Why do you have a camera out, taping a fucking concert?

Why aren't you enjoying it? Why aren't you focusing on the bass player for five minutes? Yeah. And then focusing on Charlie Watts. And then focusing on Keith Richardson doing. And then focusing on the audience. Yeah. That's all I see at these fucking places.

Yeah. I want them to ban the phones so people could enjoy the experience. Yeah. Put the fucking phone away. Enjoy the experience. Or they put it up like lighters, like assholes. What happened to the 70s when you burn your finger? You know what I'm saying?

Yeah, I totally know. You fucking take a bitch lighter. You think I have a... Do I look like the... I went to 100 concerts. I've never taken a fucking lighter out of my hands, and I've never done these shit. That's for pure faggotry.

This shit here. When they can do this shit, and they think they're having a good time, that drives me fucking crazy. It drives me to the last war. If you pay $300 to go see the stone, to her. Yeah.

Two hundred hours to go see Bert Backrack or fucking Paul Anka or Eliza James. Do me a favor. Keep your pony in your pocket for vibrate. I know you got family. Yeah, yeah.

I know you have a sick dad. But besides that, guess what? I don't want to see your shitty tape. And then you show me that you were cheap enough to sit all the way up in the Martian seats. And then put the fucking phone away. The artist is. So many people last week put up Mick Jagger from Newark.

You're fucking embarrassing. Yeah. You're a fucking embarrassment. Put the fucking phone away. And enjoy. the event for what it is. That's why I don't want phones anymore because people are not

in your, let me take a picture. Put the fucking thing down. Yeah, I think Anka does a really good job of that. Like, I think that sometimes people get carried away, but he has a whole part of the show where he runs through the audience and he'll take pictures with people,

you know, and then that part of the show's done. You know, and now you can focus on Everything else and the music. But they get their photo with him. They get their little video, you know. And he's super cool about it.

But it's the iPad thing really kind of irks me. You know, it's like a phone is one thing. When you have like a giant scream, it's like, why would you do that? Anyway, who's carrying around a giant iPad screen into a concert? So I'm going to read this last ad. Do you mind taking out the violin and closing out the show a little? I can do that. Where can they find you?

I want them to follow you on Twitter because it's an experience. If you're not following Eliza James on Twitter, you're fucking up. It's a learning experience. One night she's in Connecticut, one night she's jumping up and down with Polacks. She's making it happen. You know what I'm saying? She's everywhere. And I admire that from you.

And you have love for comedy. Like your friends with Ronnell Williams. I've been friends with Donnell. Donnell. Ronnell. I've been friends with Donnell for like over 10 years. Long, the long time. And you're a comedy fan.

I'm a huge comedy fan. I'm a huge comedy fan. Yeah, I love comedy. I, you know, comedy for me is a way to unwind after a show because I can't, if I watch something that has music in it, my brain doesn't shut off. So for me, relaxation is comedy. And I laugh and I go to sleep and I'm happy. You came to the comedy store and whatnot.

I gave you one quick hug and I was out. You were like, I got to go, I got to go, bang. And I said, I got to get around because the experience I get from just following you on Twitter. Oh, my bitching about airlines. Bitching about airlines, just the pictures. Just you put a picture up about two months ago with you and Burke Batrack. Yeah. And I was like, that is so fucking cool.

I love him. I really did. I know, I could tell. I can tell that you have been, I hate saying this word because you sound so cliche like all these other fucking jerks. close but God is watched over you you owe him big because you're getting an education that most people

fucking you can't pay for that right if you paid to go to Yale you can't get the education you're getting right now that is and that's what most people don't understand the life that you appreciate the education you get you're getting you're with the world's best

there is good as it gets those two fucking guys so yeah you're very lucky Anytime you're in town I know you live close by You're always welcome to stop by And fucking play the violin Do whatever you want

Let me read this thing I'm gonna get my violin out here Let's do this shit All right like I said In the beginning of the show The show is brought to you By on it as usual My favorite

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left for the ice house on the 31st, February 13th, and Dallas, no, February 13th. What I keep saying February, fucking 13th, 4th. September 13th in Dallas and September 27th at Chicago Theater. I'll see you motherfuckers there. Have a great weekend. I want to thank Eliza James. Thank you for asking Eliza. Kick it, Eliza. Kick this motherfucking meal.

Fucking beautiful. I love you guys. She made me tear up. That's real talent. I'm just a fat fucking felon that cracks jokes. That's real fucking talent. I'll see you guys Monday morning. Ready to Rock.

Have a great weekend. That was tremendous. Thank you.