The Church of What's Happening Now: The New Testament - #790 - Alberto Crane

Episode Date: May 27, 2020

Alberto Crane, the Owner of Legacy Jiu Jitsu in Burbank and Glendale; and a former UFC fighter, joins Joey Diaz and Lee Syatt LIVE in studio.  This podcast is brought to you by: CBD Lion - For all of your CBD needs, from shatter to gummies, go to www.CBDLion.com and use code CHURCH for 20% off.   Onnit.com. Use Promo code CHURCH for a 10% discount at checkout.

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I got one of my favorite people in studio. I got the mask on. We'll talk more about it. You know, sometimes you've got to do the Zoom, but it's so fucking impersonal. If you're willing to come in, you don't give a fuck about COVID, whatever. You come in, we talk like, man.

My brother, uh, Professor Extraord now, community leader. Mr. Alberto Crane. What's going on, brother? Thank you. Thank you for having me.

Always good to see you. Always good to see you. I've been watching, you know, when I was going to a jit-to program, you introduced me a lot to tactical fitness, little things. And one day, I actually, something occurred that made me go, wow, there's something to this. Every exercise. So when this break came, I started hitting bags and shit in my backyard. But my stress level was so hard. My fear had gone into my psyche that something made me use the club weights.

I went to kettlebells and my back hurt, started doing club weights. And then I just started breaking my wrist and moving my neck around how you told me to do it in the front seat of a plane and moving around and just move your wrist. And it just seemed interesting. And I said, I got into you. I got into Rob Miller at 9. But he's swinging like fucking Mickey Mantle bats and shit, you know. He's got like this bat. You got to hit like a gorilla with it to kill him.

You know, like they're like 85-pound bats. Rob, give him a minute. Lighten up with the pasta. And then Andy Galick, the guy that teaches kickboxing, I don't know what planet he's on. He disappears. He's throwing kickback. And then he just disappears. There's a skinny white.

guy comes in for the picture. But the only guy who's really laying down the tax fit is you. And I called you and I said, I appreciate what you're doing because I got so sick of doing kettlebells that I started doing the swings.

The clubbell, right? And then I started doing a real bar and burner with the 50 between your legs. Swing up, squat. Shoulder part squat, yeah. Squit up. And I started doing those things, 20 minute timer. Keep going. Then I do, I throw the kettlebells in, a farm a walk, a couple cleans, maybe some high pulls with a 45-pound kettlebell, bent over rows, end up with some curls.

A lot of stretching. And that's good enough. You know, you don't freak out at night. That's better than nothing. So I've been calling you, torturing you about your videos. Stop looking at the fucking camera. You're fuck. Because he teaches something.

They look. What are you looking at? This ain't Jackson. Did you ever see Jack Whelaine look at something? No. You could have showed Jackalane 18 black pussies. He wouldn't have stopped. You don't stop.

You keep going. But then he kneels. I'm like, Alberta, you're killing me. I'm in the room. I'm trying to burn calories. I'm a fat fuck. So I called you up and we were talking and you said that you had this thing coming out. You wanted to come on.

And then we spoke about COVID. And you said to me, um... Yeah, I tested positive for the antibodies, right? So... When did you do the test? When or when? When? So I did it maybe like this last month.

What it made you? I just wanted to know. You know, I got sick like in January, February. Yeah. So I got really sick. You know, around the gym, everybody had this like dry cough. It seemed like all the symptoms that everybody had. So just for peace of mind, I wanted to know.

And so, you know, I went to this place. They do the antibody testing. And yeah, I tested. I tested a positive for all the antibiotics. body so meaning that I had it, you know? Well, you know, who knows, right? Who knows? Because who knows how accurate they are?

They're always changing the opinions, right? And then the interesting thing was that they said a third of the people that have gone in there, and now they have had it, you know? Have had it. Do they stick that thing all over your nose? No, it's a different one. It's a blood test. I don't like that thing.

Yeah, yeah. So they do the blood test. And so they just see... What is it took the needle? What's that? What is tick the needle? In your arm? Or wherever you want.

Maybe. Your finger. No, they take out like a... No, they need more than just a little bit. Yeah, more than the... See, as soon as I see, I have vaccines, I'm willing to die. I don't want no needles. You understand me?

I don't want to know. I know that this means a needle. Now I got a new Chinese doctor. I got to argue with him. You know, Dr. Wu, and I got to fight with him because my old doctor retired. So I'm going to go down there because I don't mind needle. I work myself up to give blood from New York. everything else is bullshit.

If you give me a shot in the ass, I got anxiety. And once you shoot that muscle in my arm, I see fucking stars. So I detect this shot, you don't see no bats bite me. Like, you might get it. That's great. But I don't hang out with bats and fucking raccoons. Every time Lee laughs, the mask covers his eye, please. I'm just imagining him to actually have this conversation with his doctor.

This motherfucker hides food in his mask. You got to see him. You got a cookie. It's a long day. So I don't like none of that shit. So the tube in the nose, that shit, I'm not. I'm not.

I'm crazy. Was your wife a systematic? Yeah. She didn't get sick. The kids didn't get sick, you know. Were they had systematic offer? Yeah, they didn't have any, they didn't get sick. So they didn't get sick in my house.

I think there's two different things that we're talking about. You have the antibodies, which means you had it. Right, right. So then there's asymptomatic, which means you had it, but you didn't get sick. Okay. You can have COVID, right, supposedly? Who knows, right? With all the information, like back and forth information.

Right. You can have symptoms or you cannot have symptoms. So what they said actually were a third of the people that have gone in have tested positive for the antibodies, meaning that they had it. Some had no symptoms at all. Some had some and some got, you know, pretty sick. And can you get it again or no? What do they say? I don't know.

They keep going back and forth. Nobody really knows anything. The vaccines might work. You got to wait for the vaccine. but we don't know if it's going to work or not, right? You were traveling a lot for a while towards the end of the year. I went to January. I went to London.

There was like a thousand people there. I went to a conference with a thousand people. I was shaking hands like crazy. And then more else for you before London. I went to Brazil in, I think in February. That's where it got in by the, that's what invented. Brazilian was on the phone with Lujan when they invented that shit. Because it's going off from Brazil.

I mean, who knows. Who knows? Who knows what's really going on? Because I have so many friends in Brazil. And like, it's like a, at this point, it seems like it's very like political, you know. I don't know what's going on. That's the truth, right? But like my friends in Brazil, like in the cities, like the bigger cities, you know,

there's like Rio, I have a lot of friends in Bella Horizonte, which is the third largest city. And the hospitals are empty there, you know. And the major city is San Paulo. and the other party is there so they're kind of hype it seems like they're hyping it up I don't know though I don't know I'm sorry you know if I don't mean to be

just like to anybody but look what everybody is you know but I don't know I don't know if I don't know if I can believe it or not and at this point after this these many months the fact that we're questioning what's going on I don't know it makes me kind of like think twice like

what's going on right what's going on you know like in Georgia like the I saw that the governor is allowing people to train jiu jiu jitsu and, you know, train again. And, you know, so I don't know. I don't know what the right thing or, you know, I'm definitely being careful and trying to do my part, you know.

I was one of the first guys to close up my gym, right, before we had to before it was mandated, you know, because I thought that was the right thing. But I don't know. It's a difficult, difficult, you know, situation, right? I mean, that was my second big question to you was, Jiu-jitsu is the opposite of social distancing. You know what I'm saying?

Like, you know, a tranny is the opposite of transgender. You know, a guy puts mascara on in a wig, different story. You go to a farm, get your dick cut off, and walk around, then come see me, you know what I'm saying? I love this analogy. What's, you know, what is the plan? for Jiu-Jitsu. Good question, right? Well, here's what's going to happen, Alberta.

They're going to... There's what's going to happen unless you guys let it. Or if Alberto being the businessman that he is does not allow it. You've got two options. You got to get on the phone with Cabrini, Hegan, his brother,

and say, look, we've got to put together something. If all followers get together, we got to put together something. As you and I know as in the comedy world, the egos of B won't let that happen. So Alberto has to worry about his children

and his wife and his kids. I heard this rumor that this will work. Okay. So, you know, white belts come in. I saw GSP defeat George Sarah. I want to

a white belt, okay. You come in, you start the back room and you have to bring a COVID test from your doctor. I mean, that's basically, you know, you have to have a special guy that comes in at night and sprays that stuff. Now, that's an exorcist out of your pocket, into your pocket. But as far as the guys, you have such a great Nick community family. They'll listen to you. Now, I'm going to say this to you and wink at the same time. you're going to I'm the health inspector I'm walking in there right now and I'm going okay first technical fitness

just like that park we're going to put circles yeah but I got 32 students in this circle you could have 15 in this class you go fuck yourself so I had a second class okay then they're going to go into the jiu jitza room and they're going to go you and I both know that

you know social distancing and me trying to get you to fucking Ezekio is too big of I'm breathing, I'm sniffing, I'm fucking farting. That's the whole thing. How can we settle this? Well, again, all my students have to get COVID. You got to hire a Chinese guy,

not a white guy, not an Armenian guy. Not a Chinese guy. Check the temperature at the door. Yeah, we got a temperature checker. These motherfuckers, you and I both know, that you're rolling with somebody. Or something they tap for something there just a belt and they go

and you're like, why did you come here? Why the fuck did you come here today? You know you're sick. Come back on Sunday. Now you have 30-day suspension, Sundays only. You know, you have, so when that guy comes, you have to have your exist mark of what area they're going to be in.

A box tape of where they're going to stay in. And now, Then you're going to take Marco, who's a purple belt, a mediocre blue belt, and a good brown belt, and put them together. And then alternate the white belts in. And only those guys at first are allowed to roll together for the first six months. If you have everybody going crazy at once, you're going to have a breakout. Then they're going to shut you down.

Then you're going to be selling Brazilian artifacts over there. You know, little drums for capoeia and shit like that. You want to do that? Sell Brazilian stamp soap. Like, everybody I talked about that has gyms has been a little off. I get not getting a paycheck for four months and paying rent and going, wow, this is costing me. But I also get opening up and getting 50% rather than 100%. It's not even about the money, right?

It's not even about the business. It's like something that's your life, right? It's something that who you are. Like, Professor, I would never focus money. I'd smoke in front of you, but you already got to COVID. Who gives a fuck at this point?

I could smoke fucking AIDS cigarettes at this point. Who gives a fuck? I'm saying? This will be good for your lungs. Well, do you think that Jiu-Jitsu is maybe a little bit more prepared? Because, like, I don't go, obviously, but I got a notice from, like, 24-hour. goodness how they were going to do it.

Like, you have to sign up for a certain block. Yeah, so they're going to clean everything. That's it. You know, like we're gearing up. You know, we're gearing up. We're going to have everything in place. Like, definitely special cleaning things. But you guys already clean, like, my point was, like, you guys already have to

clean the mats a lot. Yeah, yeah, for sure. But I just even do some extra things. I've been to a lot of places. Alberto Crane cleans that mat. The problem is now you're going to have to clean it. More. Every class.

People's, those tubs around. So before people step on them. Exactly. Really got those in place. Really got those in place. Yeah, for sure. Jiu-Jitsu's going to really, really, you know, kickboxing. Kickboxing, boxing is you and I together throwing punches at each other, exhaling and exhaling and exhaling.

Exactly what we don't want. Yeah, we could do it outside with Mascar. But I walk into a gym, the door ain't open. I walk out. The door's got to be open. You know, I'm getting letters. from all these airlines lately. All of them are changing their

multi-air systems. You don't. You got four fucking doors. Open them. That's fresh air. We got some air filters, you know, that supposedly kill the, you know, all the antibacterial and whatever. I don't have to look more than the science,

but they supposedly really cleans the air out, you know? So just everything we can do, we're going to have in place. And you guys, or don't, I would imagine when you do Jitzy, you have to sign a waiver in case you get hurt. Yeah, so we have to have special waivers, you know, COVID waivers for sure. And but the thing is like going back to what I was saying, like, it's not about the money. It's not about like the for sure.

Like, you know, yeah, like we've been closed for like on how many months. I lost track of time. How many months it's been, you know? But the fact that, you know, we can't do what you love to do. That's like who, like who you are. Like, what the fuck, you know? I've been out every night. You understand me?

And 10 before that, I was out snorting cold, getting syphilis, getting my dick sucked. So for the last 39 years, the 8 o'clock, I'm already looking at pants, you know, looking at the shirt. How do you think I feel now? Again, for me, it's not about the money. Yeah. It's not, I'm kind of happy. This is giving your body a chance to rest. Sure.

Really see what direction you want to go. Sure. There has been a silver lining, but they have cut off our lifeline, which affects you every three days. For two days, I fake the funk. I'm having a good time. You know, fuck the Armenians. You know, you have a great time. And then one day you look at the mirror and you're like, right now at this time, I'd be getting ready to go to the comedy store and go,

oh, right now at this time, I'd be waking up, getting ready, getting on a plane. And it's real. It's real. Listen, money comes and goes. When you learn that lesson in life, that money comes and goes, this will make your situation a lot easier. You know how you're getting unemployment right now, and you're getting that six, then they give you that five,

you're jumping down like Led Zeppelin dancing days. You're going to have to pay back that nickel. I don't know if you've been told that yet. So before you spend that nickel, know that all this money is coming back a lot of it. So we're going to have a lot of panic here for a while. a lot of confusion. But anyway, back to the Jiu-Jitsu schools.

The square and sign-up classes and extra classes. Yeah. You love it. It's in your blood. You can't even imagine not doing Jiu-Jitsu. It would have to be the end of the world for a guy. It's going to happen, you know?

If I have to be a criminal and I got to go to jail, fucking arrest me, you know? Arrest me. I'm ready. Take a fucking bullet for it, you know? That's how I feel. If I saw you in a body cast, They just lay you in class in the middle.

You just give directions. Put the leg over there. I'll be doing it. That's you. Yeah, I'll be doing it. And that's why you have the school you have. It's not really a school. It's a little community.

You've seen people grow up there. People won world championships in there. You got the restaurant next door. It's like a little fucking hang. You got a kickboxing thing over there. You got the kettle. He's doing a great job. That poor bastard, Joe.

We're out of. 5.30 in the morning. Yeah. I start calling them at two. I'm going to collect calls. We're fucking the bakery. You got to call them like a two. Hello?

Hello. There's a wand there. There's no one in. He hangs up on you. You ever see those things? You ever like wake up like a 445? You're like, man, I can't go to sleep. And you walk out, you have your coffee.

You sit down. You get your notebook out. You're putting your... YouTube bond. Listen, let me see what's going on on Facebook. It's fucking

coach Alvarado jumping up and down with seven other people doing kettlebells. He says, in 15 minutes, you're like, I'll take it right over there,

and do a quick 615 kettlebell class. And as I'm moving to the closet, I go, listen, if I was to pick up a 35-pound ball right now,

the shit would blow right out of my ass off, like right out. I could not handle a 35-pound. five-pound kettle bell at five-thirty in the morning. That's too much. That's dedication.

And he does him every day, and he zooms him every day. Monday, Wednesdays, is on Friday. And Saturday. And Saturdays. It's amazing. And you know what? I don't do his whole class. I don't do Alberto's whole whatever class.

I take two exercises that they do that day, and I incorporate them in the thing. Some of them I can do, some of them, I can do. can't. The one I really like is going on the floor, picking up your legs and kicking up your hips, a little bit of a body burner, but not bad. I get up, I do the single opposite shoulders, and then I take two tens, go up and do the finisher, but then I take two 15s, hold it, and make sure my arms lock up, and then I make sure my wrist spin on the way back to who do you think you deal with it? Just because I don't smoke or weed because I think I was paying attention.

I love all those. It's all the kids, you're like, man, are these kids learning anything? You know, because you spend years with them. And then all of a sudden they, like, they know everything perfectly. No, I do. I still do my whole ground technique, you know. Yeah, yeah. The shin box, like the little hip thing.

The shin box. I still do my shin box with the finishing with me on the wrist. I still got the five pound. Yeah. Back just to do the whatever I put my back all the way towards the toilet And I take two 15 pounds When I'm nice and hot

And I fucking just press them with this direction Instead of pressing overhead I press them away So my back is locked up into the fucking toilet Oh I go bananas I've been going bananas lately Because I know You've been calling me every week

So I know you're doing something I know that We've lost half our movies just from our lives. I tell you what, you know when I'm the hungriest, when I do two shows at the comedy store and I leave that,

I'm fucking starving. Sometimes I stop at Joe's and get two slices of pizza. I get a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Sometimes I just make an honest smoothie, you know? And it's amazing how I don't have that appetite no more.

Even because my body is slowed down that, you know, you've had stress is in other places. Your mind is stressing. Your mind is stressing, but your body. So now it went from I count to all my points on weight watches.

First three or four weeks of this pandemic, I was only working out 24 points. I could feel the heat like I was going to have a stroke. And I changed it up. And since the end the fucking mark, I've been like a savage doing farmer walks, cleans.

I got a bike. Let me tell you something. You watch me on a bike. I want to see you on that bike. I want to see that bike you're on. I like all these people who pay like 300 to see Mike Tyson on Camille. I could charge a nickel to give you one ride on a bike. That'll change your life forever.

You know what I'm saying? Uncle Joey had a bike. So are you optimistic about Jiu-Jitsu? Have you heard anything? You know, I saw, there was a post today, you know, from Hansel Gracie. Okay. And he gave a shout out to the governor of Georgia, you know. How he's the great, great governor and all that.

And they had jiu-suits classes. The gyms were the first thing to open. And they have full-on jih Tzu-on jih Tusses. So, yes, I do believe it's going to come back. Because it's a, it's, talk about everything's essential or non-essential. If we're human, it's, man, it's like happiness. It's like living, you know. Yeah, yeah, for mental health, for so many benefits, the community.

You know, people like we live in this big city with millions of people, but nobody's really connected. So these things are important, man, for people to feel connected and for happiness, you know, and moving, right, all the things that we have there to stay healthy, you know, this whole fight or flight thing. Everybody's talking about, like, you know, these fear things, right? But nobody's talking about what they can do to make their immune system stronger, their health, right?

to if they do get something, they do get COVID or they get something else that maybe it's even worse. Nobody's talking about that. So you can get over it, right? So you can take the hit and keep going, you know, and get and recover from it. You know what I mean?

Nobody's talking about that. Nobody's marketing that. So what's going on here? What's going on here? Right? Something's not right. Yeah. At this point, months.

I'm a comic. Yeah. You're a jit-to professor. We're a fucking, whatever the fuck I want to call him this week. I love him to death. We don't know what. really going on. All I know is I respect my boundaries. I wear my face mask. I do believe that in crowds

for some reason and everything I've read it does take off. You know in places like Italy, what happens in Italy? I live, I'm your brother. I live in the basement. You live on the second floor and your wife and the two kids on the third floor, your mother and father live. So if one of them brings us home, everybody gets sick. That's why so many families. were dying. That's why so many people in New York are running out of the city to buy houses in northern New Jersey,

even though the suburbs are contaminated. T-neck Fentanylify. They're contaminated. They're buying houses. They don't want to be in buildings no more. Sharing the same fucking ad ducks, you know? You know, like one of the calls that we had, you were like, I think I'm not going to

do comedy anymore, you know? Comedy. I mean, we're not comedy, but like, you know, shows or what, you know, comedy shows, right? You said something like, you're upset and you kind of came out, you know? I'm like, man, like it upset me, you know? I was like, that's, that's bullshit, you know? It's like me saying I'm not going to do jiu-jitsu anymore. And, and I'm like, what's going on here, man? So much, I just feel like there's so much fear, so much fear that, are you kidding me? Like, we're going to stop being ourselves. We're going to stop living our lives. Like, every day is not guaranteed,

right? It's like, every day that I live. Like I'm going to, man, I'm not going to live and be in this bubble. I'm not going to suppress my life, right? To, to what's going on? Like, the fact that we're questioning what's going on, like, it makes me think, right? I was like, yes, sir. I did everything. Like, I closed the gym before we had to, right?

You know, we, nothing happened, you know? But at this point, like months in, the fact that we're questioning, like, we're questioning what, what's really going on? I don't know, man. Is it really that bad? Like, I shared with you. like my dad, you know, he's been on lockdown for the last two months, right? And in a nursing home, his health isn't good. So he's at most risk, right?

Guess what happens? Two and a half weeks ago, my sister calls me. He's got COVID, right? Okay. He had a cough. He was okay, right? And so they brought him back to the nurse. He tested after two weeks.

He tested negative. Okay? Then they tested him again and he was positive again. So they took him again because he went to Vietnam. He was a green beret, right? So they took him to the veteran hospital. and and and the the he's in the he's in the hospital again you know and so he's all discombobulated and so and now he has a urinary tract infection and it's in his blood and now it's serious you know

and it's not from COVID it's from the neglect man what's worse you know what's worse and so as soon as he gets that negative test we're taking him out he needs like 24 hour care you know And so we're going to take him out, you know, we have to figure it out. It's so weird how much I thought about Jiu-Jitsu when this whole thing started. Because it just lets you know about our human nature and who we are. So for the first week, let's say March 16th and 17th and 18th, I decided that I would go to North Hollywood Park, park my car, get out, smoke a joint, and then walk around the park. And then I started seeing something by the third day.

I started seeing that even with social distancing guidelines and order, you had people still four feet apart. You had people still coming close to me. Plus, I was walking behind people. People would be running, and I'd be walking behind them. So I figured out, I said, you know what, I'm not going to walk here anymore. Because all the breeding, by that time, there was no masks. people were still looking for masks, whatever.

I stopped going there. I don't know what the end of the point of the story was. You were thinking about Jiu-Jitsu when it started? When it started, because right away I said, well, How the fuck are you going to do Jiu-Jitsu with, without breathing on somebody, sweating on somebody? So I think that there's going to be a couple states going to be hesitant.

California might be one of them. It can't happen because California is basically the apex of the best jiu-jitsu in this country. It's the mecca now. It's the mecca. In the world. So, I think jiu-jitsu schools

really have to have a plan intact showers at the facility, you know, whatever it takes. No showers at the facility. Yeah. You can't take a shower at the facility. Whatever it takes to convince the people to open up.

It's about filmmaking. After a few months, we'll see where it goes. Right. We also have to take a study of how many from everybody. Marcella Garcia, a samurai, whatever, the truth, an honest assessment of how many of their students. They're big house schools like Alberto Crane.

You know, Marcelo Garcia, look at his schedule. It starts at 6th of the morning with whatever. And they go till 10 o'clock. night. So you have to assume how many people going in there, what's it going to be cut down to, you know, these are all things. And at the end, you want me to tell you what this all comes down to? Pay cut. We're getting a fucking pay cut. Life's not going to be as normal as it was. I don't give a, I don't give a fuck. I'm doing what I want to do anyway. So, you know, Stand up.

I'll wait. You know, you can't wait if they only tell you to open up with eight students. And eight includes you. No parents at the kids' things either. Parents just drop them off now. You know, again, this is all you, you know. We'll see. We'll see.

It's definitely a stressful situation. It's stressful, but it isn't. It's stressful, but it isn't. You have one, two, three, four, five, six opportunities a day to train. That's basically, and then on Saturdays, it's two, and then on Sundays it's one. If there's a school that you want to join, you can't make an excuse up about not training there. because they start back up at 6.30 and they go to 9.30. Next thing you know, you're dancing with a bunch of savages

with a string drinking coconut water. Alberto's doing fucking capoeira. But it's such a, it's such a, if you know the people from there, it's such a family, community, old school martial art. You know, you go to most martial art schools now, Jitsu from 11 to 1, called there at 1 15. There's not a soul there.

That does me no good. That does me. When I was a kid, Karate man was there all day. He lived in the back. There was a little thing. You could hear him fucking little Chinese chick he brought back from Vietnam.

Because most guys that taught karate when I was a kid, they came back from Vietnam. They brought their own little China chick, they brought their own little Hunan bag back. And they would be back there fucking and suck and he come out with his fucked up gieh. How can I help you?

First of all, by fucking washing your teeth, you smell like, no. But what I'm saying is, you have a full service place. There's times I'm going to flappers, and they're still mopping the floors at 10 o'clock at night. This isn't a guy that

is a hobbyist jujitsu that's Monday through Friday, he's a fireman. This is a guy that He wants you to walk in their white belt Knowing nothing he doesn't give a fuck That's even better The less you know the better

Don't tell him that I'm gonna get in shape for a month He'll get you in shape And he'll walk you out of their black belt More ways than one You know So I feel it's a pillar Of the community

You have to write that all down in your pitch Because they're gonna come into every business And say Ah This and this recommendation And you're either going to have to take it or go, excuse me, let me explain to you what we'll have you. I went to the University of New Mexico. My cousin's a thing and anti-biologist.

He says if I spray this and then it takes 12 hours and it gets some nook and crannies, blah, blah, blah. Because of that, I could extend the tactical fitness room instead of having 12. I'll cut it down to eight people. And then it's your time to become Monte Hall. you got to cut a deal for every student you get and then you adjust. I like these people. I'm going to open up

even if they don't fucking do it. Okay, open up. God forbid the kid does get COVID. Now who's going to sue you? You'll be fucking teaching Japanese, fucking Brazil and in Mexico with the guy from fucking the sweaty yoga place that was fingering chicks

while they were doing yoga. What's his name, Bikram? That cock sucker. You'll be doing yoga. down there with him. COVID yoga. Do two weeks. Oh, man. And I know it's not the same, but you guys have talked about it.

Do you see a benefit from doing the online classes? Like maybe someone from out of town can do it. Yeah, for sure, for sure. Like, you know, like speaking of the silver lining, like we set up a whole legacy academy, you know, a dot online, you know. So we have, you know, myself and all of our, like, amazing coaches and professors. we have like training modules and just a library of information that they can access now you know and then of course we have the whole virtual schedule with zoom zoom classes he watches the facebook

facebook live you know how torture so there's no there's no interaction that i ignore i ignore the the facebook live a bit so he's like man look at the camera like talk to me he's christ smile it's supposed to be exercising at least this time he looks at the fucking clock Why are you looking at the go to the cartericus? Get up, do a jumping jack. They can't. In between these. He got me, he got me, I make sure I get up and I do stuff.

He'll do this, and then he'll be on a row, and then he'll do all this. And he's got me going. Then he does his waist. Then it's like he forgets. He's watching. He's not doing it. I'm doing it. I'm doing it.

He's on the couch. I'm waiting for the next fucking move. I got to do it on my fucking laptop, the iPad. The iPad. And then I thought the iPad I can get Facebooks or no. So I got to do it in my office,

which is better. It works great. So at 12 o'clock, 10 to 11, I'll sit there and I'll start with him writing because it takes eight minutes. You know, he's got to look around the room. Make sure. Alberto, what are you doing? He calls you up and yells at me.

12 minutes. The first thing you were. doing jujitsu. I go, Berdo, why are you doing jiu-jitsu? Who am I going to choke? The cat? He's over there. Take the arm, put it behind the leg. Who are you going to choke? Why are you doing fucking

J-Jitsu? And the worst part is, is it? You're on camera so you can't ignore his call? No, I would call him afterward. I don't do that, too. I call him after him. Come on, jump and jacks. So I started doing the squats with him. I do all my whatever with him.

He still hasn't broken out the metal. still can't last that long because he disappears. Alberto, where are you at? It's 12.25. You were great. We did the wrist. We did the shoulders. We did the thing. We did the back laying down,

kicking. You know, we did about 10 of those kicking things like this. All right, what's next? I don't know how Berdo left. So now I've got to go in the morning to see what fucking Rob Miller's teaching. Rob Miller teaches a big class. Rob Miller's a strong guy.

and he starts with these bats that fucking Mickey Mantle couldn't hold Mickey Mantle couldn't pick up three of these things. Rob Miller's in there doing Twitter, Rob, stop, just get attention. Why are you making me... As soon as I feel Rob Miller, I'm like, I don't want to watch this no more. He's like superhero over there, swinging to another guy.

He takes text messages, looks at the Chinese girl walking across the street. Pay attention! Get on there. Do those swings so I know what I'm doing. But it's so much. much that you offer that in these times nobody would offer anything. Yeah.

All day long we got it going on. The Zoom is nice because you can interact with people. You can be like, do this, do that. Nah, but you don't want to interact with nobody. Just do this. You shut your mouth. Just shut your mouth. That's a sign right on the bottom. Either do it or go fucking hang out with Pete Ditty.

This is my class. Do it like this. Facebook Live. The only thing that you can't do it, The only thing you could do with Zoom, because especially with tactical fitness, it's that an inch of the movement of the foot could make such a difference. When I swing the bats, I can just swing them.

But Alberto taught me to swing them in to get that full stretch. So when I come out, I'm swinging out with my shoulders. So that's the thing where you do need just that to be there with it. That's it. Because after a year, if you're doing it, then you finally go see Alberta. You're like, I'd throw a year away from not twisting. He didn't see the twist.

With tactical fitness is a lot of little twist and key little things. Like, I warm up with the boom with the throwout. That's my warm up. Boom. But I also focus on this. This is for a long time I wasn't focusing on this. This has to be locked.

Order position. Okay, this has to be locked. In, push out. again locked this has to be locked I was a pussy I would do the swings and I kept doing 10 I go how am I gonna stay at I'm gonna stay at 10th or 90 so what I did was I started getting the 15s and just making sure that I held them perfect form perfect form and and locked my body in breathe let out spin perfect form the first time I did the other one where you bow and you're fucking,

that's a little confusing the first. The first time you hear you hear, I don't care if you're Einstein. There's one earbang, and it's like when you do Newchucks the first time. First time you practice Newchukes, you go home with a bump. What happened now?

I'll tell you at dinner. Mickey will tell you. Oh, man. Oh, my God. I have a bunch of friends. I'm surrounded by people who do, dude, you did too. And, like, a few weeks ago,

I saw on Instagram they would meet in a garage and watch like Speakeasy clubs. Yeah, like they watch videos of like tournaments and they try to recreate it. They just meet up and they just train, you know, on their own. It's very interesting. And listen, I'm not mad at people. I can't get mad at you for doing that, okay? But you're doing that in somebody's house. Obviously you're doing Grandma's house. Grandma don't even know what Jiu-Zitsu is. She's obsessed watching Mori Popovich, you know, waiting for Oprah. because she hates black people, but she loves Oprah.

And you're downstairs doing fucking killing your son, you know, breathing. And someday one kid's going to go up there, breathe on grandma. You don't know that grandma had hepatitis. You know, whatever. I don't fucking know. You know, listen, why do I wear a mask? I wear a mask because I know where I've been. I know where I've been.

I've been on 2,000 flights to last 10 years. if I know you know and these flights these people should be ashamed themselves I've seen I've been there where people get off a plane and they will say okay boarding

they don't even air out the plane you're going right back into the fucking germs so I'm avoiding everything I saw years ago filthy all that shit we laughed about a couple weeks ago putting your foot on the screen oh yeah

have your sneakers off on the plane on a plane. Disgusting. You take your toe, you go on a plane with flip-flip. First of all, if you're a man and you're a flip-flop, you lost a fight against me. I don't care how many martial arts you know. Because the first thing I'm doing is my gorilla heel. We're brisitis. I got a little bursa ball that stings you like a beehive. I will step on the middle of your foot that before you throw a punch,

you will drink ten times about it. And then I will grab your dick and pull up and squeeze down at the same time. time and not even Takasaki get out of that move. You understand me? That's the Uncle Joey Twister. Eddie Bravo can bang his head go to Brazil. Nobody can get out of that one. You don't even

know what it risks to pull on first. A foot squeezing you and the other guy and you're breathing in his ear. How long do you think this is going to last before your dick gets ripped off? Anyway, I'm sorry. I get dark thoughts to let his fucking...

That's the thing, man. We got to get back into, I don't know, man. Sooner or later, like, got back to what we're going to just hide out for what's the, what's this? Well, you have a good standing with Burbank. You have a rather be good standing with Burbank. You're a majority of business owner in Burbank. You have to sit down with your teachers tomorrow or Saturday and go, let's set the guidelines. You have to look at your schedule.

we might have to add a few classes. We're already on it, you know. Take a few classes. For sure. Yeah, take a few classes off if you're not doing anything. Sure, sure. And it's the safety of your... I want to know...

The thing with L.A., though, right? The L.A. County, there's not even a date for opening. Right. That's the crazy thing, you know? Like, the governor is at least talking about, you know, phase three, hopefully, you know, one of these days. You know, one's months. Again, I'm an actor, and I'm a hudseler.

Okay? You tell me that there's three kilos of our cocaine, but it's stuck in the house in Mexico. Okay, we could sit here and wait for the helicopter to come. Or, you busy? Not really. You busy? Let's go pick it up ourselves.

Okay, so what I want you to do, or any gym owner, or any prospective owner is. No, for sure. We're ready. Act as if. Yeah. Yeah. Act as if.

I didn't say they opened up your store. Don't say Joey D. has told you to... No. Go to your business, put some X's on the floor, take the plexiglass, put holes in it, put it over the register, leave a gap in the bottom, go for the hand sanitizer.

Not the Russian one. It's already got fucking Osama blood in it. You've got to get an American one. And you've got to have a plan for them. And then they'll come in and meet you halfway. At least they're not coming in telling you, I need a handicapped bathroom now for COVID people. That's it, you know.

What if they come in and go, not only do I need a tranny for trannies, a bathroom for handicapped, now I need a bathroom for COVID people. I mean, I'm not saying this is going to happen. Right. But I want people to understand that you're just not going back. everybody's losing

25%. You're losing 25%. If you're a wait staff, they're cutting half the tables. If you're a movie theater, they're cutting half the thing. If the Dodgers play, you don't have to sit next to Joey

if he's got an armpit's mouth. You've got three seats. They're going to have to give it to you. And you're going to have to sign stuff, and there's going to be thermometer checks. And if you get it, do I sue Alberto,

Crane there. If I go to Alberto Crane school and I get Jiu-Jit-to, do I school? No, that's why every city is looking for traces. To set Alberto down and go, Alberto, let's do this.

When did you get off the plan from Brazil? Sunday. Where'd you go? I got an Uber. What was the Uber's name? Abdul. Where'd he drop you off? Where'd you eat dinner? Who'd you get contact with? You know, that's what's going to happen now they're going to come back to you and they're going to really shut

you down yeah I mean it interesting how you barb the plane example and the reason is that for that I think is because people get upset and start yelling why is my plane late why it's not taking off I'm like I think a lot of this I blame us as people because I think that's part of the schedule leave now we schedule a plane lands at 1040, it can't take off to 11.30. There has to be a mandatory cleaning. You know not to be at the airport until 10.30

anyway. While you're fucking landing and going through your thing, they should be cleaning off the fucking plane. Right. But I'm talking about small business owners right now in America. Right. Who are suffering. I'm suffering with you. So I'm telling you right now, but I close this

fucking shop down? No. I can't do live to live. Thank God, Alberta. Don't give a fucking He does that fit. And he's got an immune system of a crack hole. He can lick a fucking sidewalk and spitting your face. Nobody's, you know, people, if you have a business, my brother owns a framing shop in New Jersey.

I love him with all my heart. I said, you're not open, but what if you want in there, sat there with one of the lights on? What if? I know lots of people that are giving haircuts. in their backyards and their, you know, in their businesses, you know, they have the people come through the back.

Thank God I'm losing my hair. The middle piece hasn't grown, but the sides I just buzz it like a fucking Puerto Rican. You know the day I buzzed it and I got a big patch out of it. I mean, I had to put crazy glue over it and shoe polish. But no, seriously,

listen, I need a haircut. I'm going to wait until it all goes legit. I want to come to TACFIT. I want to wait until it's all legit. Yeah, I mean, that's the thing. That's the thing. Because how bad would you feel?

Well, when are we going to open up? Alberto Professor, open that door just a little time. How bad would you feel? How bad would you feel? Okay. Spikes are rising in Texas. Spikes are rising in Georgia. This weekend, Alberto Crank and have a barbecue if he wants.

He's an American. Only one thing. Don't invite nobody. You got enough fucking kids. And your wife's got a sister, she's got kids, and everybody's got kids when you're out of median. That's it. You know, you're still got to be vigilant. I don't care what you believe, what the scientific evidence says.

I really don't care. I know what the scientific evidence says. If you touch something, now they're saying, if you touch 10 dicks and nothing happens, no COVID. That's what they're saying now. Yeah, the CDC. That's a new thing. Oh, it doesn't stay on things. Yeah, it doesn't stay on things.

And that was the big thing at the beginning. Just don't go into a fucking bar and do blow. And fucking get breathed on by Johnny Black's moves who's been playing the baseball, playing nine years, and did time for 18 of them. And you'll be fine. Act as if. Yeah, I mean, you gotta be careful, but, I mean,

I think that it seems like there's a lot of people who have been careful to get sick. I think it's just, I don't know. Now, you have MS. publicly known put it out there. Multiple sclerosis, yeah. Is that an underlying condition? So what's that mess?

Your immune system attacks basically like your nervous system, right? So yeah, I could have complications. But what do I do? I do tack fit. I take care of my health. I am like super proactive. You know, what do you think that's going to do to my immune system? What do you think that's going to be to my overall nervous system and everything else?

So, and you don't think the mindset affects that? You know, think about, like talk about the, you know, let's talk about the immune system, right? With this whole fight or flight, like all this fear on the news. What's going on? It's suppressing, it's suppressing our immune system. It's almost like they want us to get sick. What about in New York, the governor comes out and he says 66% of the people with that COVID-19, the new people, they've all been under, you know, they've been home quarantined. How does that happen?

They're all scared. They're all like, you know, not doing stuff, right? They're not exercising and they're not doing things that. So they're, and they're not. mixing we got to mix germs man you know that's that's our immune system right that's how it responds and that's how it adapts and that's how we stay strong that's so we stay healthy you know a little kid you want him to you know walk around on the you know crawl around on the ground and you know put stuff in his mouth like if we're not doing those things like i mean it's like a recipe for disaster what about

a second wave comes what if it's other thing comes we're not going to be prepared for it you know what if jesus makes come back there's a lot of things exactly we don't know we don't know we're still We still got to live our lives. That's it. We've got to live our lives. I got to get people out there working. Yeah. I got to get Americans out there working.

That's it. That's it. I watched the Fox plant in Detroit opened up. As they were walking in, people were saying, we're not ready. This is bullshit.

And they try to omit it. They had to close the plant within 24 hours. They got three new cases because we're not prepared yet as Americans for 10 and over. something goes on when there's 10 and over.

There's a situation I can't stop thinking about. Michael Yo, Jimmy Big Balls, Jeffrey Gullion, and Chris Mozilla in the same setting like this one night. Until one in the morning, just talking. The next day, three out of the four of them ended up in the hospital for weeks. Nothing happened to the fourth guy. You know, what did he do differently? and why the immune system meant that way?

These are all questions I have. Do I think it exists? It exists. Do I think it's lightning down? Yes, it is. We don't have the dense population New York has. So I think here in California

we're okay right now. Disneyland's still not open. Watch Disneyland's lead. If they're not open, then you shouldn't be open. They know something you don't know. So, kickboxing now becomes kickercise. You and I can't face each.

You and I can't face each other. That's it. We can't face each other. We got a stagger. Start with a five-pound bag. Boom, a five-pound weight. Throw kicks.

Now you can throw kicks in front of a bag. If you had six bags, now you have to have four because of the six-foot distancing. This is what's going to change in gyms. What, you know, like Sweden, right? Like they never closed up, right? And then there's like, you know, these German scientists, these doctors, right?

He was like talking about herd immunity, right? So what about that? What about that, that way? Is that a better way? I think the scary part is we're finding out even the doctors don't really know what the best way to do this is. But, you know, if we don't know, what's the, what's the choice, right? To live in fear or to live your life? Of course, being careful, being precocious, right?

I live in fear, and I'm careful at the same time. It's like, I live like being a drug deal and having a million dollars in your pocket, and you got a gun in your pocket. They're behind every bush. Don't think they're not saying you up. Don't think that chick that's half-topless looking for a ride home is there for a reason. They're then to knock you to fuck off. So you're always looking.

You're still not touching doorknobs. you're still washing your hand you're still well you watch you that was my point or like I've seen a lot of videos the last week or so

of people just being assholes like yelling I'm grocery store people and then the grocery stores they're on edge but then they find out that Rock and Roll Ralph had 30 employees

test positive for COVID and people who went in that a lot of people who went in their they are well what about all those people on Home Depot or Costco right yeah

so that's I'm saying. I think the reason where it's gone on so long is because there's a lot of people not doing anything. Because in theory, this thing guys, two weeks.

I think if you say fuck it, yeah. We say fuck it with this heat. I get vitamin D every day. I breathe. I ride a bicycle outside. At first,

I was trying to do the right thing. Putting a fucking mask on. You can't ride no bike with a mask on. You got to breathe fresh air. Yeah. Just keep your throat fucking dry. Because it attacks your throat

when you dry. So that's why they said, you really have to be, what's the word? Vigilant? What is it? Vigilant? No, not vigilant. When you're full water? Hydrated.

Because that's when it's actually the most. Like, if I leave here, I'll go home and gargle without water. Just because I had contact with you, I'm not going to be mad at you because I think I'm, I think I have the antibodies also. I flew that weekend. But anyway, getting to all this bullshit. You, in your, when the first time that you came on the podcast, you spoke about dedicating your life to Jiu-Jitsu, moving, getting the support from your family, living in a shed, getting your black belt from Margarino, whatever's name is.

Jackalino. Dracolino, ta-t-t-da. You fought for Jackson out of whatever. Jackson's, yeah, was his first MMA champion. Unbelievable. You know. It was King of the Cage, which is a big deal

back in the day, right? Yes, it was. Back in the day. You fought the UFC, then you said, fuck it. You did a couple other fights, and then you discovered

that you enjoyed teaching. You were Gracie Baja for a while. You told them to go away. They don't pay you. You got to pay them. You know what I'm saying? Like, you don't fuck around, Alberto Crane.

But, and you created a legacy. And it's become when you see those lunchtime pictures, it breaks your heart because you saw it from 20 people to 40 to 60, the people nailing,

people hanging from rafters, you have women's self-defense, but you have something that nobody has in the area. And it's something that, like people my age, yeah, I can put a guy on and go to Jiu-Jitsu, but how much practicality am I going to get? from jiu-jit-to. I'm going to go twice a week

and be sore the rest of the time and then every 90 days pull something. Yeah, I can go to kickboxing. That's a great exercise. But at this age right now, 57, you get the fucking not the scoliosis, you get the other one

where the muscle deteriorates after 40. You have shit that you can't. A year and a half ago, I couldn't shoot a basket. Do you know now I could shoot a basket with my daughter. I can't do a 20-footer, but I can do a three-footer because of those bats.

I mean, that's the thing. That's the part of, like, you know, the Jitsu. Like, that's why I'm so passionate about TackFit, right? Because it gave me that ability, you know, me, myself. You know, I had so many injuries and the MS diagnosis, like, I couldn't put my seatbelt on, you know? I was in bad shape. You know, I was just like, you know, everything hurt to move,

so I would just want to stay in bed, you know. I was in a really bad shape. I didn't act like it. People didn't maybe know, but that was the reality, you know. And little by little, the more I did like the tie crew, you know, moving the neck, the into flow and all the stuff that we do, things started to change within me, you know. And all the students that do it, you see the same thing's happening, you know. And so, yeah, I mean, that's the key is to have that part of your training, you know. But I think martial arts, you've been to martial arts your whole life, right, since you're a kid.

And so I think we never, I never got taught those things, you know. Like the Mr. Miyagi, put his hands together, right? And, uh, and, uh, healed Daniel's son's shoulders, right? So I think that should be part of the martial arts, that healing upon or healing yourself at least, right, to understand your body, just the awareness, right? So you can. What's a typical week?

So people, I remember once you broke it down for me that Monday was heavy. You know, Tuesday was this. You know, the way Scott Sondon has it, he has like a wave. He has a four-day wave. Like no intensity, you know, low intensity. He waves it, you know. So it's like different intensity. So I think just to keep that.

mind, you know, because everybody's lifestyle is a little bit different, you know, and so maybe one day, but not training hard every day, you know, but switching it up, you know, and you can change that up. You can use that in jiu-jitsu, for example, like one day, okay, I'm going to train a little bit more, maybe today I'm not going to train. I'm just going to do technique. I'm going to move my body, you know, I'm going to, you know, do the warm-up, do whatever, we'd focus on other things, you know? So I think, I think just kind of waving it, waving it, and, you know, doing the same things as the wave of tack fit keeps everything like in check you know so you know and you're asking about the tack fit you know we have the first we have monday juries it's like more like kind of like

different time protocols like a little bit harder you know and thursday we do a flow and friday we do a technique day where we break down complex components and make it like simple so you learn it and then saturday we're back you know but you can make it whatever you want you know for example for myself maybe i train hard jiu jitzu the day before so if i do attack for the next morning, I'm going to use it, even in those hard ones. I make it easy on myself. I go lighter and weight. I go lower rep count, you know, and I use that workout to recover.

So you can make it wherever you want because you can scale it to how you want and how we win what you need. How many cities is attack for it now? And, you know, like there was a- It's growing because I know that I saw that this week you had like guest fucking. Yeah, so we got some guest coaches. Isick, Isick is our new, like, U.S. director. you know so he's uh he's doing a lot and he's been in the system like back since back in the day

back and before i even tacked the name tagford existed so he's like ogy you know and so um what was a question like who how many how many there's there's coaches all over there's people all over the world practicing it but there was no organization you know and so we're trying to organize it and make it better you know but there's people and all like man around the world china taiwan there's there's a there's a there's a there's a there's not a school but i I want to help with that, you know, I want to help that because that's what I see is speaking to these. There's people that are certified that are coaches, but there's no tack for schools and that's

the future. That's what I see. That's what I want to see, you know. Like, I believe in the community. I know we're doing the social distancing thing and all the stuff is going on, but I mean, for us to live our best life, I believe in that, you know, that's what keeps you in check. That's it. Even you're like, guys, maybe they don't do the Zoom class, but they see like the Facebook

live is going on. And it makes them like, okay, cool, there's some normalcy going on. We hustled. We went there right away, right? Without hesitation. Professor Joey, myself, Robert, we got on there on Zoom right on Facebook Live. Right away, we're doing classes. And we got it going on, Coach Andy.

You know, we have it going on for us joy, right? All day long, all day long we're doing it. And it was important. You know, just a lot of people don't know what to do. A lot of people didn't even have club bells. Yeah. But they got to see what you were doing and go, you know what? Maybe when things open up, I'll start going over there.

Maybe. How many of your students have been keeping in touch? I don't like doing the classes. I mean, a lot. You know, we try to connect. And, you know, our community is strong. I lent out a bunch of our club bells and kettle bells and, you know, even some like these heavy bags that we use for like, you know, they're kind of like dummies, you know, jihutsid dummies. So we lent them out just to support everybody, you know, so they could follow along with the classes and have their own tools because actually cattle bells and actually the club bells that we have for the tag for two, like they were sold out and a lot of.

in a lot of places, you know. Most places like you know. It was sold out everywhere. Everywhere, yeah, everywhere. Bicycles. Everybody became Rocky Balboa. Everybody was Drake. It's unbelievable.

All the gyms are closed, right? Yeah. When I read that article that you couldn't get a bicycle, it was crazy. I was like, is this true? And I went to the guy and he was like, we don't have no bikes here until Wednesday. I told my name. He goes, I have one for a year and for tomorrow. Next day he brought me a bike.

I had to go buy a seat for it. I never ride in a bus. bike ever since tremendous tremendous and stuff now you have a uh

worth uh wrestlers it's a grab grapples toolbox yeah grapples toolbox yeah come out

grapples toolbox one-on-one so it's like it's kind of for beginners and now we had talked about you know you know

being your best at every age and so it's a thing it's a tool like obviously like my niche or my my life has been jiu-s so I definitely have jiu-suit people

in mind for this you know because all in people to be able to train I believe in jih Tjitsu as a tool for you to be your best, you know. And so it's something that helps you, you know, stay healthy for, you know, every decade, right, to stay healthy, you know. And so it's, you know, you should have that. I believe that it should be part of your training, speaking about having that ability to heal yourself and just understand yourself better.

But it's for everybody. Anybody can use it. You know, anybody can use it. And I try to do it as basic as I can, you know. But it's good for advanced people because there's some details. I talk about my experience, you know. And, you know, but it's called the Grapples Toolbox 101, coming out on tackfit.com, you know, next week, next Thursday.

So I'm really excited about that because I get to contribute, you know, to something that's really done a lot for me. Brother, you're a good man. You have a good school over there. Like I said, it's not a school or an academy. It's a little family, and I spoke to Marco. You know, and I know a lot of guys are hurting me because that's all they got. They really, that's all they got.

You know, I bumped into a gym owner at a supermarket. I don't want to say it with his name. He's a real fucking moron. He was telling me how they got to open his gym because Governor Newsom is getting sued. And I had to look at him and go, are you fucking retarded? You can't be this fucking stupid.

He's Brazilian to boot. He's like, no, they have. to. My friend says they're going to sue Governor Nossum. We open up training next week. And I'm like, you can't be this fucking retarded. You're in no danger. He's still making videos of him on the beach. UFC 1. Who gives the fuck? You know what the fuck is wrong with these people? Always a pleasure having you, Albert O'Cra. Always a pleasure knowing you're there. You have two schools. Lend We're just doing great. And Legacy and Burbank and

whatever you need. Mui Tai, girls, self-defense, fucking kettlebells at 5.30 in the morning. And then they do jiu-jitsu afterward. That's crazy bastards. You know, jujitsu starts at

5.30. If you've got kids that can't behave themselves, bring them to Alberto. Within a month, they'll be all right, or it'll be choked the fuck out. We ship them up. the back door over there. It's over. What happened? We don't know. They left with a fucking Armenian family.

See you later. All right. Bye. And that's it and that's that. Real quick. Let me read you something. All right. I want to thank the maestro of Jiu-Jitsu. Alberto Crane. Who knows when Jiu-Jitsu's coming back. It's the opposite of social distancing. What are you going to do? But anyway, this podcast is brought to you by CBDLion.com. When it comes to CBDs, the best.

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You fuck. I turned out to come in here no more. Isn't I? You a little fucking COVID cuck sucking. I got to spray some fucking lice all on my hands now. I'm still the best fly swatter in North America. When it comes to swat and a fly, nobody gets him like Uncle Joey. I hate those motherfuckers. Look at him. He's like Mr. Miyagi. Look, I'm not going to cut off like I got to find him on fire.

There you go. Now he's on fire. Fuck him. Funny you fly people. to complain. You want to call the ambulance. This is a fly on fire in my fucking office right now. Anyway, I want to thank Alberto Crane. I want to thank this fucking fly. And I want to thank you guys for always having my back and support in the podcast. All right? Have a great weekend. We'll see you Monday morning, Tip Top Magoo. Ready to go. Stay black. Kick this meal. Lee.