The Church of What's Happening Now: The New Testament - All In with former UFC fighter Alberto Crane

Episode Date: March 24, 2026

Former UFC fighter, Alberto Crane rejoins The Church for the first time in New Jersey to talk UFC, the positive side of a MS diagnosis, his new book, "All In" and to catch up with Joey Diaz and Lee Syatt.  SHOW NOTES Head to http://tryfum.com/CHURCH to get your free gift with purchase & start The Good Habit Today! Visit https://prizepicks.onelink.me/LME0/JOEY & use code JOEY to get $50 in lineups when you play your first $5 lineup! Get 10% off your first month of BlueChew Gold w/ code JOEY @ http://BlueChew.com

Kick this motherfucker, Neil Lee. What's happening, beautiful people? Uncle Joey here with his trusted sidekick, Mr. Lee Syatt, aka to Cato. And we have a special guest, my brother from a different mother, Mr. Alberto Crane. How was everybody's weekend? Great.

It was a great weekend. Fantastic in Kentucky. How long are you in the city for, Tarzan? Until Wednesday morning. That's it. D.C. is next. Vegas. A little mini PR tour for the book, you know?

What are you doing in D.C.? A couple shows. A couple appearances. You know, about a White House. We're going to do some fun stuff, yeah, for sure. We've got to check out where they're going to have the UFC card, right? Yeah, yeah. Let's see what's up, you know, over there.

That's crazy. What do you think about the card, UFC card? Yeah, the White House? Yeah, the White House. You're going to go? I want to go. It's going to cost you. 75,000 tickets.

I heard it's free. Yeah. It's free, right? Yeah, but they're picking. Right. It's not you're going to win in a raffle. No. Yeah.

You know, they're not going to give you that in a raffle. You don't have to check your background. Not everybody's going to be a lot to go. A lot of people are going to be brokenhearted. There's going to be a lot of white people there. Maybe 10 black people with one Spanish dude. And he better be like a prisoner of war or he's a president from another country or something like that. Not just a regular black person.

Huh? Not a regular black person. Look about it. It's going to have the high level, Washington people, the president's friends. you know, and it's not going to be, like I was saying the other day, look, it's going to be people who watch a fight that usually don't watch a fight. Right, yeah. You know, when we watch the fights in the apex, I always felt bad for the fighters.

Because, well, I'm a comedian. I feed off the energy. As much as you don't think, that's my 90%. That's my bread and butter. They don't have to talk to me, but I can feel them laugh at me. Now I've got to take it and throw it back. Motherfucker, take that. It's the same thing.

So I was like, man, that must be the punches sound louder, you know, so even the guy hears it even louder in his ear. But then, yeah, right? You ever get hit in the ear when there's no music on? It sounds bad. Yeah. I think it's great. I know a lot of people are talking shit about it. I'm not even...

Talking shit about it because I'm not going to be invited. Right. And they're going to watch it on Paramount. It's going to be commercials for ICE and fucking God knows what I'm saying. Free Cuban as well. I think it's pretty cool. Just the idea to have it at the White House, no matter what you think about anybody,

I don't, it's just kind of cool. I don't know. I think, like, to be able, I am surprised, like, they didn't have, like, a huge name. Maybe, like, they'll get someone later on. You think they'd get, like, like, that one on Netflix looks pretty cool. That one of Netflix? Nate Diaz, come on.

Yeah. And then Rousy, but she hasn't fought in, like, 15 years or something, close to that. they give her a fucking loot of money good for her Diaz and Mike Perry 10 million right yeah yeah something like that you crazy and then Ingano and Gano's coming back

there's a bunch of people on that one I mean that's that's that's like car do you expect right for the White House oh yeah and I you know but I do like this on Paramount because I haven't watched it in years like I said if you think there's commercials now oh yeah with you know how to know

listen everybody's going to be watching that's the beauty of it everybody's going to be watching yeah nothing everybody's going to be in in front of their TV. I'll be watching. You're going to hit the president haters. You're going to get the Nazis fucking firecrackers.

You know, everybody's going to hate. No matter what you do, you can feed a thousand fucking children for a year. And, uh, yeah, where you gave him stolen money, who gives a fuck? You know, three people died. I had to bring a boat of Coke, Cuba in from Cuba with Coke and fucking, you know, something. But people always question no matter what you're going to do. And that's what this fucking whole thing's about, right? Lay it on me, Jack.

The start is, given the background. We go back 22 years. I'm looking at the longest yard. 22 years in Santa Fe, New Mexico. And he said, I'm going to come in. And then he didn't come in in in Santa Fe. But fast forward on him. 15 years later.

Yeah, I walked in. He shows up in Burbank. The legacy in Burbank. He was supposed to do jiu-jitsu during that filming? He was going to, yes, because Ivan Salavari was there. Yeah, I would go to the school. Oh my God. He was there all the time, we're hanging out.

Yeah. I'm honestly not, because I was 100 plus pounds overweight too. Could you have done that at four, whatever you were? Could you have done you did it? I would have trusted him. The way he told me to get on the mat. Right. There's certain people that sell you this and they have no idea what they're talking about.

Right. And there's certain people who fucking get it. And I know he got it. Because you said they were even, they were giving you oxygen just to walk around. Is Santa Fe high? Yeah, yeah. Seven thousand feet. So it's higher than a mile and a half, right?

They had 12 meetings about my blood pressure. You know? Yeah. What do you as like a coach with someone who's that? Because I was 3.30 at 5 foot 3. Like I was just as fat. Like when you see someone starting out at that big, I mean, just feel out their breath, like how they're doing? Their mobility, right?

See what they can do? And stay with them there, you know, and then add to it little by little. That's crazy. You can't walk, crawl, whatever. Do something. You can do something. I don't know. No, probably.

Whatever it is, you can do, do it. I couldn't imagine at my heaviest going to do Jiu-Jitsu. That's, uh, that's, and so you went, how long, when did you start? Because you started a few years into me knowing you. I started 2011 on a whim. I'm fucking, at V-Mack? I started watching those videos at night. I get high and watch the ones.

videos and I'm like that. Eddie Bravo was trying to for years, right? Yeah, I don't do no key. They told me already, but that wasn't it. Doug, once I saw Roger Gracie, that's the way to do it for a big guy like me. It's slow, pressure, kiss him in the neck, move up a half inch, kiss

him again, move up another half inch, another half inch, and the guy's nose it's fucking coming. And now he got two things to do. And Doug, I don't know how he does. He just slits his hand in, and then he sits there for. another eight minutes. He moves up and

try and he just put the other hand up and it's all over. I shout. And you know, like he just chose you to fuck out. True story. True story. If you look at all his videos, they're all the same. He takes you. You take him down. Something happens is a scramble. He's on top of you. And once he

gets that mount, I don't know, what's his percentage? It's fucking brilliant to what. That's it. Game over. Once he gets that fucking mouth. One hand in the collar. That's it. That's it. And he sits there and cooks you. You push that fucking triangle.

He shifts over into that fucking guard. And he just fucking, at that point, you're like, you know what? poke a fucking finger in my eyeball. I'm suffering here. Oh, and it's, I don't know anything about martial arts. But I like the UFC. And I know people call it boring. But like when you're watching the UFC, if someone can just take you down and hold you there,

it doesn't matter how good of a fighter you want. if you can't get up, the fight's over. And it might not be the most entertaining, but like, you win. I mean, if you understand the game, that's control, right? Right. Dominance, like, look at GSP, one of the greatest of all time. Kibb, right? Yeah.

And then Kams out for the lately, right? Like, they... It's not going to be a bomb in New Jersey. That's a hell of a fucking. I heard he said he don't want to talk to no goat fuckers during the press conference. So they're scared of the fucking... They're petrified of the... fucking face off. Who said that?

I think. Homs out or who's fighting Hamzat? Shon. Oh, Sean O'Malley or Strickland. Okay. Oh, Jesus Christ. Yeah, he said. That does sound like something he'd say. I don't know a fuck a goat fucker or something like that. You know, it's just Sean Strickland said that? Yeah, he's crazy.

Could you imagine translating that to Khabib? Like, because he comes out. There comes that. Ah, I'm sorry. To anybody. But I can't imagine saying, what did he say? He said, I don't want to talk to a goat for that. Yeah. And he said something else. There was two quotes. I don't remember the other one.

After that, you didn't hear anything else? Who does the shit? But that's mental. Listen, all I know is this. I swear to God, every week, there's one night my wife's like, I'm going to bed.

I'm like, go. Go, because I don't even want to watch this fucking TV show. And I go in the room, and I take my notebook out, I get tuned up in the garage. First thing I throw on. I've watched it 300 times Kabib against

Dr. McGregor. Oh, yeah. I watch that twice a week. It's in my YouTube feed. And I watch how he held him down by the fence and all that. Then the other fight I watch is Kabib against the Brazilian that could kick. Oh, shit. The kid that was training in New Jersey with Mark Henry.

It was Frankie. I know you're talking about it. Alvarez and the Brazilian. That threw those spinning back. Yeah, yeah. Morat, Marat, Mara. Oh, my God, it's going to fucking eat me alive. And I watched that fight.

And that guy was fucking people up with his legs. And there was one point in that fight. Kabe was just trying to fucking drown him. You could see the fear in his face. You could see it. I'm done with this motherfucker. That made him. Kabeep beat the fuck out of him.

Beat the fuck out of him. Who is it? Give me one second. More ice? He was a fucking kickboxer. Yeah, yeah, yeah. A Brazilian kickbox. He trained that he lived in Jersey.

Right, yeah. Yeah, but then he went somewhere else. Burk out on me and Mark Hamer. It's too fucking coldy in the winter. Edson Barbosa. Edson Barbosa. It was fucking mind boggling. Mind bogg.

And that's when you see the power of you being able to take anybody down with the same stupid shit. over and over. You train in training camp for eight weeks. They know exactly what he's going to do. Your wife makes you do it around her. Yeah, and you go, and Khabib will still fucking break your spirit, not even underneath, your spirit is broken.

And if he's punching, if he's punching and he traps your one arm, he starts hitting you in the ribs, that's a, that's a brilliant fucking thing. Knocking you down is one thing, Professor. Hold to the man down. is another. For a long time, 15, 20 minutes. Like, and there was a few weeks ago that Max Holloway fought.

And everybody, he just, I love, he was one of the first guys I loved. And he was so fun. He's still probably, I haven't seen him in a few years, he's probably still really good. And the beginning of each round, he was so ready to go and then immediately. Olivera took him down, which.

I mean, what do you guys think about the BMF, that being the BMF belt? and him doing Jiu-MF belt should be for, I don't know. What's that? You would think so, but a record's a record. You know what BMS means for me? Figure it the fuck out. Yeah.

I'm going for the BMF belt. If he's got me in Australian headscissor, figure it the fuck out. You know what I'm saying? Figure it out. That's what BMF is. Yeah. Me being the fifth round, I'm getting beat up. And once I get this guy in a fucking triangle.

Yeah. And my leg is broken, but I still held him down, and I choked him and fucking, that's what it is. He threw jiu-jitsu at him. And I bet Holloway prepared. What do you think? He didn't fucking prepare for that. Yeah.

He knew it was coming that kid climbs on you. That kid doesn't take you down. He just starts climbing on you. Right or wrong? And now you got his weight on you. How long can you sustain that when your adrenaline is high? He wears you out there. He just fucking starts putting a hook in and starts climbing up your back.

And right there, he's, he doesn't, don't even got you. He's got dick. He's still adjusting grips and shit. And all of a sudden, you go, I'm going to bang them backwards. Let me go backwards of them. Night night, because he's going to leave two hooks in you when you're not. He's going to get knocked out, but he's Brazilian. He's doing that all their fucking life. He's still going to hold on to that and he's going to wake up and tap the dude out. And he does that constantly. My bullshit, you're professor, who you think you're dealing with joy by the energy? You did good. That's it. So what inspired you have to

After Santa Fe, I saw you again at Justin Fortune's gym. And I watched you walk in there, and I don't know if you were fighting in the end of the UFC. You had moved there to train or something with the UFC. I was fighting. And I think I went to one of your fights, blah, blah, blah, where Rogan took me. And then I didn't see you for a bit. And I heard you relocated. And the story goes, I called the school because I couldn't find the schedule.

You fucking called me right back. What do you want? Who's this? Alberto, what? Joey, what do you want? I go, now I want to see his schedule. And a year later, I walked it again. I go, I'll be in there like a week or so.

You came to the door. And then I was on the mat and you're about to walk away. And I went outside. Hey, Joey. Hey. And it's, come on in. Come on in. I forgot about that.

I think you talked about it. Like you would go and not. it out of the car for a while? All the fucking time, man. You're fucking 50, you're out of breath. You can't figure it out. I'd have surgery on my nose. And you just really liked the art.

I moved here and it took me a year. Kid kept bugging me. A brown bell. I kept calling out as long. You don't want to swing by me and you. Just real life. And listen, this is the fucking real story. During the pandemic, I developed the fear

from North Hollywood, from seeing that black dude, from just seeing things I had never seen this area before and I had lived there for 20 fucking years. Okay, when you're somewhere for 20 years and all of a sudden you see bikers living in the fucking circle. One day there's 2,000, you wake up when they, wow, what the fuck?

You can need money to live in this building and you look down, there's 22 bikers. 22 fucking bikers. And you're like, what the fuck happened to the neighborhood? Also, they bomb Hudson County Park. And there's a rally because they hit a gate. guy in Minneapolis on your fucking boulevard. You know, it was surreal.

It was really like you were living in a fantasy. You will, now looking back, it was all fucking staged. It was all a fucking boy. All those people were just fucking employees or whatever the fuck they draw you. I'm not conspiracy theorist, but I never saw a town change that quickly. Hey, I'm sorry, the edible's hidden. You had a fear. You came here.

So when I moved here, the fear continued. And then I had knee surgery. And I was still, like, very fearful of things happening. I was still, I would go to restaurants, I'd keep my eyes open. I would always be very paranoid. When I got home, I always took a shower and washed my nostrils out. It was horrible, guys. I was living in fucking, I was old.

I wanted to see this kid live. And now you're telling me, I'm going to die from breathing on you. I did the knee surgery in January, right? you worry, right? And he kept calling me. Joey, come in. I know you're working on. I know you're doing this, but come in. We'll do some close guard, whatever you want. Nah, no, no, I want to coach. Thank you. And finally, he called me every fucking month. And I never ducked him. I always picked up the phone. And something in his voice, you know, come on, man. Come on, man. Come in. Come in at three. When you want to come in, there'll be nobody here. and it was September 21st,

2002, the same night the Sopranos movie, that fucking movie came out. When I walked into that fucking gym, you know I was shit and pickles. But I remember when he got me in like a fucking side control and he was breathing on me

and I'm breathing on him. And I go, if this is COVID, it looks like I'm dying. Because this is fucking, When I walked out that door, the fear was eliminated. That night, just to put in perspective to you, the fucking car didn't put me in front of the premiere.

He put me on the corner and opened up the corner. When I got out of the car, I had 2,000 people. And I had to walk behind the gate and security had to pull me in. Right there, I'm like, I'm gonna die. If I don't die from Jiu-Jitsu, this just fucking got me. And then you had to wear a mask in the movie theater. That lasted 10 minutes.

I'm not sitting here with a mess. So when I left that night at home, I'm definitely dying. Like, I'm definitely dying. So I stopped and got pizza. I pulled the George. I stopped in the city. You know me. And it was the best wings I've ever had in my life.

It was two Puerto Ricans guy making pizza somewhere in Midtown Manhattan. Un-fucking believable. The whole ride, I'm not going to die. But guess what? Two days later, I called that dude. Because I knew the contact had pushed me through. The fear was gone. I was back in.

When he had me inside control, and shit. I'm trying to hold on to his leg. He's trying to mouth. I'm like, fuck, do I miss this? Then you just pick each other up and fucking, you're sweating. He tells you how he caught you. It's unbelievable. So I went back. I signed up that day. You know what? We did like six or seven private. And I wasn't going to go back to December. And I was having such a good time. And I said, fuck it. And I hurt my knee now. And I haven't been this since January. So I've been a little depressed. But, you know, I got to find other ways to use an outlet.

Yeah, yeah. He showed up, man. He came back. It's good. I tell people, when you want to know about a town, when you move to a town and you want to meet everybody like that, and I'm talking about connections, Jack, not some oaky-doke guy.

Yeah, my uncle owns a club in Hoboken. No, no, no, no, no. I'm talking about six-figure guys, state fucking people that you don't even know. Like that school was all North cops. And the Brazilian who taught it, he's, we call him the invisible man because he'd never show up. So I used to say, you're the real master of invisible school, Jiu-Jitsu.

You don't show up. He wouldn't show up. But I love him to death. He works all the UFC events. It was fun again. I had a lunchtime class like yours. Yeah, yeah. People at the time.

Nice. And we were just going there and fuck around. And it was just, it got me out of it got me into breathing again. You know, got the fear off, not. And I didn't give a fuck who was choking me. I just enjoyed it. I fucking, not that I was going to pay some chick to choke me and stick a feather in my ass.

I'm not ready for that yet. I got to find one of those chicks. That has a chicken barn, you know what I'm saying? I still got it, professor. What does it like to have him in class? Man, it's the before class. It's the before class. I'm sitting there.

and he just walks up to you and then does this, you know? Let's talk in here. Before you know it, there's a little crowd. It gets bigger and bigger and bigger. Oh, my God, we used to rock. And then the party's old when a girl comes. That's that everybody just breaks up. We were laughing at his jokes.

That's, and like it just, I can't even imagine, is it fun choking them out? Oh, yeah. It's fun to joke you out. Because I'll crack you up. Choking me out.

Oh, that's, That's not fair. Big neck. Big neck, big hands. Yeah, so it's tough. And I'll fuck with you. Like, I go, don't do that. I'll fucking stab you the lungs.

They start laughing. Now I got at least wiggle out a little bit. You motherfucker. The kid helped me a lot. He was a purple belt. He's a great fucking kid. You gave him a school now. He has a school somewhere.

Josiah? No. He's fucking good. Filipino white. He was very good to me. Is a Filipino white kid? Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. With the girlfriend that was. was a circus. She lived in the circus or something like that. Right? I think she was in dance. Yeah, she was a dancer. What kind of dancing?

I don't know. Not a dance. Her family was involved in something where she grew up. The white girl. Yeah, yeah. The real pretty girl. Yeah, yeah.

She was in dancing. She came to L.A. to become a dancer. Professional. Oh, okay. Why are you pulling my fucking leg for a professor? But he That guy helped you out, you said? Who?

The dancer's boyfriend, Josiah. He was very patient. You let me drill with him and shit. Let me get on top of him, sweating, breathing heavy, calling timeouts, smelling fungi toenail. He was right there. He was the trashes. You know, and that's right there, that camaraderie.

But even when I joined that school over here, My point was that I'd be, all of a sudden, I knew where the best health food store was. All of a sudden, don't go there, go here for acupuncture. All of a sudden, for I'm a detective, I didn't even know you were a comedian. These guys just told me, I can't believe you spoke to me for a month. I didn't know you were a comedian. These guys, you always tell me, Uncle Joey. I'm like, who the fuck is Uncle Joey?

He goes, you talk to me for a month, like a gentleman. He came back, he gave me like a fight. He's the governor's driver. Oh, shit. And he's like, you get into a beast. from Jersey. I'm your first fucking call. He brings me, like, what's that shit? Everybody eats? It was

hot last year for a year. They take it out of the ocean and they put it into jelly all different. Every Seamoss, every white kid, he got into that. But he also brings me tamales and coquito. So that's a real Puerto Rican right there. Shout out to the Boricu's watching

the show. Do you have a lot of connections? Like in LA? Could you do if you want to do something, you could call a student? That's it. the network, right? Like, you just, he said it, like, it's the network, right?

It's a network. Like, the biggest network worldwide, right? Anywhere you go in the world, you got it, you know, anything you need. Yeah, the chief of police, Burbank's training, you know,

now. So, you know, just, all walks of life. Who you're fucking with in there and who you're in a trench with and who you giggle with and at the end, you see him run,

change, and come out with a detective badge. And you're like, I was talking about, weed around them. Listen to I got a Chinese kid in my school. And I met him on the softball field

with his kids. I got to Jitsu. He's a fucking purple belt. There you go. And also he tells me, he goes, no, I work for the FBI, organized crime task force. I'm like, no shit. So we exchanged numbers. We were talking one day. And I forgot what his name was, but I had two of those names in my phone. I just

got a pound from California. I took a beautiful pair. I took a picture of it, and I sent it to him. And also like 20 minutes later, he goes, Joey, that's the funniest fucking thing. Anybody's ever sent me? He goes, he goes, I wasn't a drug meeting. As you set me that. I had to hide that picture. I'll see you in class Tuesday. Who the fuck knows? He's a skinny guy that has tremendous cardio, by the way. When you roll with him, he goes, don't go for nothing. I want you to keep your heart rate at 1.30 and talk to me. So that's why with him, I would always roll the last roll of the day.

Because with him, it's more of a cardio and he cracks you. You're not getting around his fucking legs. He's one of those, I don't know, Chinese, I don't know. You should put, like, FBI on his contact or something. You should, like, you should really. I wasn't thinking, you know. Who has a friend that's in their fucking FBI? Who?

I don't. Then last week you had someone else who was in the DEA. This is something. We have a Cuban guy from Miami that grew up. peer that's the DEA and they just re-signed back up and we have somebody else we have the cop that arrested Iceman it was a story you were taught telling an east mix husband he came on the podcast okay dude that's crazy I saw enough with the chin to chat what made you sit down and read the book I've dedicated my life to teaching and you know making trying to make a difference right

and that's just another avenue to do it you know share my story you know you've done a actually your podcast was the first podcast ever did. Yeah. And, yeah, I was like, a podcast, what are you talking about? I was like, yeah, just come by, you know, okay. With you guys. And you had me talk about, talking about paddling a boat. I remember that story.

And the lagoon, you know, and people would steal my paddle. Yeah, let's spend back to the island. Yeah. Pretty much, you know. What's the name of the book coach? Oh, and the beauty I like about the title. lessons on and off the mat because this is this is where the money is I know his background you know and I know that this is just beautiful picture this is a man

that fucking look at the black guy I haven't had one of those since Halloween 82 you know what I'm saying I don't do we want to know what happened in 82 oh my 82 was rough New York that was that was a You know what I'm saying? He was getting smacked. Rick James was running for president. Shit was crackle-lachman. That's a pretty cool.

As much as you probably didn't like getting punched in the eye, that picture is pretty cool. When you saw that picture, like, I'm fucking badass. You know, it's like my life I've always had kind of black eyes. I'm always doing it. I'm always on the mat. I'm always training. I'm always, you know, mixing it up.

So it's very fitting for the book, I think. I like it. Yeah. When Santa Fe, Santa Fe, summer 2004. you look very happy. I think you were your wife. Yes. It was like the beginnings or something.

Correct. The movie comes out after we left Santa Fe. I never went back down there. So I didn't see you. And then I heard that you were back. Justin, I saw you. I gave you a big hug. I was really excited.

What made you get out of the school business at that time and put it all in for the UFC? I moved to L.A. I wasn't sure if I was going to do it. another school because it's a lot of work. It's a lot of work. And, you know, like, you raise guys from day one and, you know, the black belts and I don't know if I wanted to do it again, you know?

And, and I was like, what do I want to do? I was like, well, let me finish this fighting thing. So I started fighting and started continuing my fighting. Got in the UFC, one fight, two fights, you know, and then just kept going. And then randomly at this Muay Thai gym that I was training at, the guy asked me to do a jiu-jitsu class because I wasn't sure if I was going to do the school, right?

And I started teaching a class, like Orlando Sanchez, and much of the guys that are still training with me now were training, and they took him to a tournament, and they all won. And it was so rewarding. Like, I took six guys, like, five out of the six guys who got first place, and I was like, man, I have to do another school. At that moment, I was like, this is what I got to do, you know?

And so one thing led to another, I opened the school again and that was beginning of legacy in LA. If I was going to your school, if I started going to your school at 13, now I'm 21, I picked up my hands, I've had some amateur fights, some Armenian, I'm tough. You know, I'm fucking tough. Those Armenians are tough. You gotta punch them three times, you know, and- Three times. Yeah, not once, three fucking times. And they better be all good. You're gonna break your hand on one of them, but you better hit them again. Even if you break your hand, you better spoken in the eye, they come back.

I'm never forget, I'm rolling with some guy. He's killing me at Alberto's. And the only one I can do is hold on to his legs. But every time I go to twist him, I can't. I'm buried on them. But every time I try him, go, ooh, ooh. And I'm holding on to that pant leg then. What's going on?

He goes, you're pulling my hair. I love that motherfucker. Like his leg hair? Yeah, he had leg hair. I'm holding on to the legs. So you don't fucking. And I'm thinking, oh my God, I'm fucking this guy up. I don't know what I'm doing.

I'm just holding on to his leg and his neck. And he's trying to put it over me. And I'm like, fuck, this. And then he goes, excuse me, you're pulling on my head. Oh, very long. And even that, the culture. Like I said, I was raised with Armenians here in Northburg, and I was tight with one of them.

There was two of them, both of them were fucking savages. So when I went out to LA, in fact, I told you, my Armenian drug dealer call me. But he calls me 11 o'clock at night. I can't have that. He's all fucked up. I'm sitting here at the Lomba Club in Las Vegas. My friend wants to talk to you. You know, come on, bro.

It's 11 o'clock at night watching the honeymoon. When did you start writing the book, Professor? It was, you know, Anthony. Yeah? So his mom did an interview. with me and just randomly like a blog that's all started and then some years past she's like listen I can't stop thinking about it but I'd love to do a book with you and that's how I started you know I said a quote in there like all in like I

committed to to doing this jiu-jitsu thing and and I was like she had never written a book before and I was like let's do it you know and it took five years she wrote it, scratched it, started again three times, until we got it. And here it is, five years later, all in. When you decide to be all in,

what is the feeling that you have right now at that point? When you look at something like I did, and go, guess what? I got nothing else. You looked at it and go, I got nothing else, but I've been doing jihadistram fucking 10 years, and I'm a black. I got something going on.

So it's the same thing. When you look at an opportunity, now you're teaching, and one day you have the opportunity to open up at school and do this, and you know it's going to fucking change your life. But part of you's a fucking pussy. You're like, you know what?

I'll just keep staying in my mother's basement. It's all going to work out. I'll get my own piece of property when she dies. Well, how do you know you're all in? Like, do you remember that feeling of being fucking humiliated, kind of sort of? Yeah, like, think about my beginning, my story, my beginning stories, my origin stories.

Like, I lost a lot when I first started competing in. So, it was good. I was tough. But I don't know how to compete. And I put all of myself into competing and trying to be the best. And I lost for like three years straight, every tournament. How many tournaments in three years? Like 13.

Damn. And that was a lot. I was sleeping in. In airports, I have a lot of money. So it was like, I put everything into it. And every time I lost, I had to come back and tell everybody, yeah, I lost. sorry and I kept going. I shook it off, kept going. And I think it's those people ask me, what are you most proud of in your journey? Like winning this, doing that. I'm like, well, man,

not quitting those three years. And because when I finally won a tournament, I was one of the best, like, blue belts in the world. And I kept that all the way to Black Belt. And I would never have known that if I would have quit and stopped. The long time. So you wouldn't lose every match but you wouldn't win a time. I would lose. I would lose either first or second match. Brutal. Brutal. brutal. Brutal. And you went back to

train on Monday morning like it was nothing. That's it. It's a new week. That was last week. This is this week, motherfucker. Yeah. At my pity party. I started breaking down the weeks. Just give you because you know if you break the month down what happened last week and what's going to happen in the six months, you're going to die.

Pretty soon that's going to eat your lives. You know what? When you're a savage, you're going for I only drift coast to coast Sunday to Sunday. You want me that day? Call me that week, motherfucker. This is coast to coast. And every day you got to get up enthused. You know, especially when you open up a school and you got Mousterfeet

and the wife and blah-b-bah. And especially now, I can't imagine what it would cost it. I see these schools that are opening and they look like fucking fountains of youth. Who sank $8 million before the school even opened? Good luck. We're cooping your fucking money. Good luck. whatever happened to just the garage, dope it up a little bit,

put a hole in the fucking door, cover it in the winter, cover the hole in the summer, open it up, let's get some oxygen in there. Matt's mouth to mouth, one of those heart. And that's it. Let's get this party started. 85 a month, and we're flying through the end this bitch, six days a week.

But now you're paying for, I got to walk stairs and ring a bell and fucking bow. It's jujitsu. What's all the drama for? I don't care if you're wearing it. a mock. Because when I first joined, I was really fat, so I'd buy a judo geese.

And after like three weeks, I'd walk in there like the fat guy and enter the dragon and the shit with a judo gey on. You were doing joy karate skits when I saw you at Justin Fortune. Yes. In the back. Yeah, with that crazy Brazilian guy.

Haleibaba. No. What's his name? Renato. Renato? Renato? He opened up a school in fucking Orange County. Oh, come on, man.

He fought Chuck LaDelle. I'm mad of the names today. There's a name. His nickname is a Cuban saint. And I keep forgetting them now. Like both their fucking names. Come on, guys. It's not,

and I'm sure it's wrong. It's not Jenna Jameson's ex-husband, right? No. It's not Brazilian, yeah. Oh, Brazil. Orange County, Brazilian, M. A. Babeloo.

Babeloo. That's a real person? Yeah, I had a company. I had a guy to pay him 10,000 to choke me on camera. My neck wasn't right for four weeks. I had like a cocaine twitch. I was like one of Rick James fucking girls in his documentary.

You see that documentary? Every woman has a Twitch. One's got an eye patch. It's not good. You know what? And wait, who got paid what? Some of M.A. Listen, man.

Paying you $10,000? Listen, I was living in a one bedroom with 10,000 cats. And I did a joy karate video, two. And it was like, So I had this martial arts new league. They would compete with the UFC. I just threw a number out of. 10 grand.

Like, okay. And then like, if you get Renato, Babelieu, we'll pay you an extra 10 grand. Done. All his age and we did it and we choked me out at. I didn't go to sleep or nothing. He was in the UFC at the time, right? He was in the UFC.

He was in the UFC at the time. He was fighting for the title, I think, even. He had already lost the title. Like he had lost that fight against whatever. This had to be, yeah, yeah, yeah. I've seen a lot of videos of you. I haven't seen that. I wonder if that's even out there.

We got to look it up. They wanted to bathe through it like a, it was nice. I was starving. Me and my wife was starving. Do 10 grand to get choked out one time? Huh? That's it? Just one time?

Oh, no, no, no, no. You know, no, no. You know, no, no. You know, no, no. I got them like for 5, 5, 5. 5. And then they wanted me to go to Vegas for their first show and fucking do this and wear a costume and fly out of a drum.

And I had some fucking Coke deal and call them back, asking him for a bump. me 2,000 more. And the guy fucking came to the agreement. And two weeks before, he sent me a fucking thing. We can't get financing from Japan. We're going to hold off on the project. I really have a deposit.

You know what I'm saying? So I cashed it and everything was beautiful. All those people were popping out of woodwork when you shot videos in 2001, 2002. But not only interrupt us, get me, don't. What's that? The world we're here.

where what? Where were we here? Man, I'm, uh, yeah, I'm all over the place. What you're talking about me? Bob Lou getting choked out, Joey karate. That's what I saw you again. Yeah, that's my call you. And just in fortune.

Just a fortune. That's right. Oh, shout out to that motherfucker. Yeah. Still. Still there. Matt and Pacquil. Boxing coach.

Yeah. Still there. Tell them people to get the fuck out of my gym. I fucking hate you. Yeah. You were talking about coaching. And I haven't read the book yet. But when like, when you win, when you're fighting versus when,

like someone your coaching wins, does it feel better? What is one cool? Like, what is it like? It's different, right? Yeah. It's different. Feels better. I think, I think in a way it's like more rewarding when you help somebody, you know, win, when, when because it's bigger than yourself, right?

And when you, of course, like when you fight and you compete, like you're, hopefully you tap it something bigger than yourself. Like you represent your coach and your teammates and stuff. You tap into that. But I think it's different, but they're both rewarding. but like I think it's bigger, you know, when you coach somebody. For me, at least it is. When you were getting all this together, what's one of the biggest struggles you went?

Biggest troubles for struggles, struggles. Jitual schools and all this, you know, that you do because... I think my whole life, right, competing, fighting, was always chasing something, you know. You know, we talked to like some months ago, too. You're busy, you're busy. I'm always chasing something, right? And I was diagnosed with MS, multiple sclerosis.

This month is MS Awareness Month, you know. I didn't pass my last fight medical. So I did my fight in the UFC, fights in UFC, 2007. Five years later, I didn't pass my fight medical. And I had these legions of my brain and they, you know, treated me like my life was over. I was going to be in a wheelchair, this and that. And the silver lining is that it forced me to slow down, you know,

and really enjoy every month. moment with my kids, with my family, with friends, you know, and just be present, you know, not be chasing like the next thing. And I remember my wife was asking me like, you know, are you going to be happy when you do this, when you do that? And I was like, yeah, I'll be happy when I do that, when I did this. And she's like, well, happiness is a choice. You can be happy. Doing nothing, right? And so it really forced me to slow down and just be more present. and it's made me a better person. You have, how many children?

Three. Three beautiful, amazing kids. Amazing. I knew them when they were different to that, right? And then. Before we had kids even. Yeah, yeah, it's crazy, man. You know, that little gym.

And then you had like a kickboxing back there, and then it started adding. And then you built a tack fit in the back, which we'll get to in a minute, and then this tropical smoothie place. And there was a balloon shop in the corner of the youthful, where they saw,

sold balloons, the white belts when they came in. I'm just teasing. Professors are fucking gangster, man. And you sit there and watch this shit happen. Like I was telling somebody, like, it's very weird to talk to somebody. Like young comics, they come up to him, blah, they're like, how long did you think?

10 years, whatever the fuck. It's that journey. It all comes together at some fucking point. And for you with the MS, come on, man. God bless you. there's people I got out mass and tap the fuck out. Never mind open up a smoothie shop. Yeah.

You know, teach tactical fitness classes. And that's where your strength comes from. You got up every... I don't give a fuck, you know. Yeah, yeah. They should say you to Vietnam. Right? They should sit here in Vietnam.

You still be here with a missile hand. Yeah. Do it. Yeah, do it or die trying, you know? Like, do everything I can do. Yeah, life's short, man. I'm ready to live my best life. I don't know.

Life is short. Very. And we're going to take commercial break. When we come back, I'm going to talk about some new stuff and shit that's happening, right? Let's take a five minute. We'll be right back. Go Pete and we'll be right back. Uncle Joey here.

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We're back, bitches. Professor Alberto Crane's here dropping knowledge. Glendale, Pasadena, Burbank, fucking, well... Malibu. Cosmatic Pan, wherever Khabib is from. He's got a school everywhere. Give me a date. Give me a town, I'll give you a school.

You know what I'm saying? Anyway. Don't you have a pizza place? Pizza place? Yeah. I'll say Jungle Cafe. That's the pizza place too. S.I.B., the photographer.

He's got a pizza place. What up, though? Shout out to him. And, yeah, we got a cousin. We got a cousin, too. Some character in the room said this before. Little goat. Armenian pizza.

I love Armenians. I love fucking Armenians, you know, like Coke dealer, your family. I love my goof around with all of them. I call him Abib, but the whole, no, what you call asshole? Not the asshole when somebody's in that. Abush. Abush. I call people Abush.

The only time I got pissed off was when I walked into the Armenian pizza parlour in L.A. under desperation. They got a box of pizza sent them with the slits already in them, and they just put the cheese on them. and they fucking threw it in there. And you could taste that it wasn't. There's something about food that's made together. And there's something about, like my wife's lasagna. She can't do it.

You know, she's not Italian, dog. She tries. It's still that prison lasagna. No matter what she does. I can pat her on the back. I can hug her. It ain't going to work. It's prison lasagna.

It's either good or bad. If you're starving or you want to kill yourself. I love my wife's cooking. But her lasagna, just don't fucking cut it. And I love her. I love it a debt. She's American, Indian, and Irish. What the fuck does she know?

What expectations do I have? Anyway, I forgot where I was going with this story. That's what I'm talking about. I can't remember shit. That morning? Perfect. I could talk to you here about concerts, people I mugged, what I did with the money,

where it's hidden. It's hidden under Lee's mattress. He don't know about it. I got an eye on my money and his money at the same time. Anything happens. I pulled the plug and then send that in Yahoo email where he is. It's supposed to be a secret.

I'm trying to remember how you got there. Where? From those, oh yeah, I mean, yeah, thank you. That pizza was God awful. God awful. That pizza in Burbank, Mr. Pizza on the corner. Oh, my God, I went in there one day. It was just bread, a little bit of sauce, and a ton of cheese.

I mean, like they just put a bowl of cheese in that motherfucker and sound with a straight face. Come on, guy. I just boy, I just go to Joe's. Before I left, that's all I would go, Joe's. In Hollywood Boulevard, we would just pull over on a Tuesday like pimps, fuck parking. Me and Lee would, that's the night he fucking was high and he kept eating the crust. Oh, my God. And he looks up and he goes, I love it when the crust is crispy.

I did. He stuttered and everything. And he wouldn't look up with both eyes. Like, he was like, when my cat, my kitten had a kitten, that would look at you with the pizza and growl at you at the same time. Oh, yeah, don't take that crust. Fucking 10 pounds, he's growled at this fucking 18-pound gorilla. But there's a, there's Brazilian pizza, right?

Brazilian pizza, they put ketchup. You put ketchup on it. Unless you want to go on a witness relocation plan. You saw Henry Hill, they put ketchup on egg noodles. Just saying, just saying, you know. Yeah. Give it a try, Lee. George, give him the history.

That's your assignment for the week. You get an extra 50 this week. Fucking, yeah, no, I want to hear about Brazilian pizza, the brothers. the chain, how they ended up in fucking Newark? I am bound. Yeah, buy inbound is great. But professor, I'm going to ask you a question before we move on because this is MS awareness month.

And I'm interested, you know, I knew what was going on with you. When you got the prognosis or whatever they call it. Diagnosis. Diagnosis. You know me. I didn't go to my clothes. I cut class that Tuesday. And you got the diagnosis.

What did you feel in your heart? Well, they treated me like my life was over, and then I was going to be in a wheelchair, and showed me, like, the drug catalogs asked me what did I want to take. I kind of was in shock, and then I guess just like in martial arts and fighting, like, you kind of don't accept defeat, you know, and I don't want to be a victim and cry, oh, my God, you know, I'm okay, what's the solution, right? Well, can we back up for like a quick second? What, like, why did you go to the doctor?

Like, what were you seeing then? Every five years in Nevada and in California, they make you do a brain MRI for your fight license. And so 2007, I did one because I was fighting in the UFC. 2012 I was going to fight on a local card. And so they made me do a brain MRI. Oh, so you weren't seeing any, any, any, Well, I had symptoms when I think about it, like there was numbness in my body.

I just thought I was, you know, a lot of years ago being hardcore and cutting weight and, you know, doing stuff that, you know, it's hard on the body, right? Stress, whatever. So you got the MRI and that's when they told you? They said we found leit. You had lesions. They had actually had lesions in 2007, but it grew a lot. And they said we need to do more testing. we can't let you fight on this card.

So they called me in the day before the Wayans. And then they said, you know, hey, we can't let you fight. We need to do more testing. And so I came in and did more testing. I didn't do it, let them do a spinal tap. You know, they did everything else. And then they like, yeah, it looks like you have multiple scroses. They work with the best brain doctors, supposedly, from USC and all that.

And they diagnosed her with the ass. You once told me something that I believed, right when you told me, You said that you doing jih Tjitsu helped you see your best. And you were trying to get other people with that master to show up. You know, put them together nicely so everything worked. You still believe that today? It's the people, you know. Look, like we're hanging out.

We're having a good time. I'm happy. You know, I'm happy. Like Kevin, I got Lee, you know, we're hanging out. We're doing positive things, you know. It makes me feel good. I think we're energy, right? We're mainly energy.

Like, if you look at an atom, we're doing. were point zero zero zero one like mass, like the nucleus and the rest were energy. So how you feel it's gotta matter, right? And I love jih Tzu, I love the people that I have in my, in the gym, the community. And so it makes me feel good. So it's gotta help.

It's gotta help. I know it helps, I know it's gotta help, I know it helps. You show up at all these benefits for MS alone. Even there, I do, I do an event, you know? Like this, like you said, this month is MS Awareness Month, So we thought it was fitting to kind of release the book this month.

You know, Christina Applegate, she came out with her book. And she talks about her issues with MS. And, you know, there's quite a few celebrities that they're dealing with stuff. The other girl that we spoke about. Really pretty girl from a lot. Married the children? No. The one from with Justin, she made that movie with Justin Timberleck and the fucking girl from Buffy.

And not Justin Timberle. Like that guy that ended up marrying, oh, fuck. Summer Blair. Selma Blair. I remember I saw her report on one of the TV shows, and I spoke to you about her how, you know. You're a fucking savage professor.

I mean, it's going to be a scary situation. But if you're in a fight, if you're on the mat, right, and you're training with somebody, you're going to panic and what's going to happen if you panic and, oh, my God, it's over. It's over. It's not over. So I guess I choose to find a way, find a way to win.

I had, you know, it's in my book too. You know, my first thing was like, can I ask the doctor at the time, can I still do Jiu-Jitsu? And he said, yeah, there's no, there's no, you know, hits to the head. And so I said, okay, cool. So I signed up for a tournament. And I did one, it was in Vegas, did two.

and I ended up going on a world tour all around the world, like the Amazon, Europe, Middle East, Asia, like world tours, you know? And I had like a moment where, you know, actually I got, I had food poisoning and I competed and I ended up getting choked out. And I ended up like throwing up after my first match and I couldn't eat.

It felt like I had the flu, right? I couldn't eat. I couldn't drink anything. And the first guy I went against where I threw up. up after the match. He's like, you do the open weight. And because there was three guys in the division, the master divisions, and there's the smaller, right? I qualified because I didn't throw up on the mat to do the open weight. Yeah. And so I did the open weight. And he's like, you know, I couldn't eat, I couldn't drink. And I was like, okay, like, am I going to, well, at first I was

like, am I going to stay here to compete or am I going to feel sorry for myself with the hotel? So I decided to stay. And I was sitting there waiting for a match. Maybe, but I was, I was, I was about an hour and a half and I started to state to myself, I believe in my technique, and I started to make me feel good. And so I kept saying it again and again and again. And went out there after about an hour and a half and won my first match, one of my second match,

my third match, then even did a couple more matches without food, without drinking water, because you know, you feel like you have the flu, right? And after that day, after that day, like I knew I could win, you know, just the power of the mind. They showed me the power of the mind. Like my thoughts, how I think, they showed me the power of the mind, and I just needed to know how I could win.

And my next chapter was, you know, finding like tactical fitness, you know, just the type of training, you know, applied neuroscience. And that was kind of like the path, you know, it was like the next chapter and finding the solution. And, you know, I've gone all kinds of gone down this rabbit hole of recovery. and just trying to understanding the body, like a human dissecting a cadaver, like dead bodies and stuff,

just to try to understand what is a nerve, what is a ligament, what is a tendon, what does it feel like, how does it work? Like, what is a nerve? You tell me, what is a nerve, right? It's like liquid. It's like pudding. You know, and so, you know, movement, like your thoughts,

when you're stressed, when you don't have mobility, things tighten up. And then this signal doesn't get to the area. So all these things kind of come together, right? And the more you know your body responds, it releases hormones, and then because of the hormones, things work better. You know what I mean?

So it's all connected, right? And so I just started to go on this rabbit hole of just trying to understand the body so I could find solutions and find ways to, you know, to do it. And so the movement part for me definitely was tack-fit and, like, connecting my breath, you know, the structure in the body,

you start to learn about structure in the body, breathe your breath connecting your breath and all that and then the quality of the movement and all those things kind of lay down like myelin which is like the the rubber around the i'm not losing you guys you know but the rubber the rubber around like the electrical wire right so if you don't have that rubber around that wire the signal's not going to get to the area and so that's what happens like with with ms is your your immune system attacks your myelin sheath right and so the the signal doesn't get to the area and that's why people go end up in wheelchairs and you know things like that happen where you can't talk, you can't walk.

And so I just went down this rabbit hole, and that's been part of my movement practice, at least. And then, of course, how you eat matters. The people you hang out with, like, you know, you're laughing, you're having a good time, you're managing your stress, right? And I think even if you don't have MS, right, we should all be living in that life, you know,

and that's kind of the MS has kind of helped me, guide me in that direction. Less is more, you know, doing less, you know, is, you know, choosing to be more present and just may be a better person, you know, overall. One of the things from your book I like with lessons on and off the mat, you know, I tell people this all the time,

I was never going to be a world champion, but the lessons, like I joined Jiu-Jit-Tun within weeks I knew how to lose weight. I knew I had to fucking go to a hypnotist to learn how to breathe, I had to get nose surgery. you find out all these things about yourself. One of the first times I rolled,

a guy mounted me, and I had to run out of the studio, take my gear off, and my pants off, right on Burbank Boulevard, take my dick out and piss. I couldn't breathe. I thought he was going to fucking die.

And that makes you go home and think about a lot of fucking things. You know, that makes you go home. And the mat for me was, yeah. Like right now, if you're over 50, you're getting ready to retire, go to fucking jih Tjitsu.

Don't ask questions. Go once a week until you retire. By that time, you get a little white stripe and you go again. These guys will fulfill your fucking every need. From the minute you walk in there to the minute you walk out, they're fucking

carrying your bags, they're fucking gentlemen. You know, the older other gentleman, we were always helpful. Alan Savage is 80, 80 years old, right? Look, I would look at Savage and fucking walk by him, embarrassed like you're 53 Joey fucking Savage was 76

at the time he was there at 9 doing something then no gee at 10 he was choking some guy and then from 11 to 12 he'd be fucking doing things with a dummy he used to bring a fucking lunchbox like he was going to the beach

for three days his meals were broken up into three what he ate when he got there what he ate during you know you'd be rolling with him also he's like hold on I got to eat a carrot and a half, you know, like shit like that. But that's why he's 78 on the mat. And that's how you have to be.

The guy weighs. And then 35. You throw your leg up. He flies in the air. So you've got to be careful with him because he's frail. But just the fact that, you know, I know people that dads are at home watching fucking daytime television. And here's this fucking guy at 9 in the morning doing something.

doing some club. What's that nine? There's a tack for it. There's 10 o'clock. There's a no gee, but he's there by himself. Right. Training with the dummy.

Sometimes cones, like street cones. Whatever. Whatever is there. He's grabbing. He's moving. He's doing it. He's running lapsing on the mad in circles.

He ain't going to live forever, but he's going to die with a fucking smile in his face and not in the hospital. Yeah. And it's not the fucking jujitsu and the arm bars. It's about. the warmth. You get that warmth later on that you really need.

And I'm not talking about I'm not gay. Press is not gay. All right. This ain't about being gay. Just the fact that I know that man could kill me. Just the fact, I know if Lee gets on top of me, he could kill me.

Yeah, in class, he's getting in an armbar, or, you know, he's trying to omarata. On the street, Lee would fucking kill me. I know this for a fact. When McGregor, I was at your school when McGregor fought, I'd hate the ass. I would fucking get beat up,

but I'd sit there for 45 minutes watching his black belt. In fact, you took pictures with a guy last week that was my all-time favorite black belt, the artist. You were at his art studio here. Oh, Johnny. He used to wear a hat to come to the overclass. He used to beg me, please, when I go, Johnny,

I get off a fucking plane. at 10. You guys are doing Sunday at 8. Who the fuck is up at some? I went to that class. He was one of those guys that you told you were about to kill him, but then he put you in a trap. And he held you there for fucking 18 minutes. And you're like, how do I get out of this? He's like, I'm not going to tell you shit.

You're going to get out of it yourself. And he would pull the strap a little harder. You don't even know what strap it was. You didn't even know. He would get his fucking sleeve. He would take my sleeve and put it between his fucking legs. I couldn't get it out. He would just trap my fucking things. It's not about the trap or any of that shit.

It's at the end. I drop on top of it. Even though he could kill me, I give him a hug. It's two men sweating or female sweating. And you get up and you know, Joy, you almost got me with that thing. Your weight's getting better.

Alberto, that fucking anaconda choke. Holy shit. Thank God I put my knee in your eyeball because I would have never got out of that, you know, because I had a cheat against me. the professor. Professor I know would kill me. And just knowing that walking the streets now, you're looking at people, you don't know if they're a purple belt. That nerd, you see with the

glasses that ain't jumping up and down at the club, everybody's taking Instagram pictures. They're all steroid it out with the gold chain. That skinny guy would take three or four of those guys and choke them out within two minutes. And that's the humbleness you get when you walk into a Jiu-Jitsu studio. Right or wrong. Yeah, that's 100%. And that was what I got in that school. It makes you want to come back.

The addiction is an armbard. The addiction is a camaraderie that you don't find anywhere else that you have to pay for to have this camarader. Now you're getting the roll. You're a blue belt. You're getting a row with a black belt. Who's going to smash you? He lets you work.

And at the end of the last minute, he fucking, you know, you feel your eyeballs coming out of your head. But after he gets out, he fucking tells you. you. This is how I got you. This is what you're going to do next time. You can fucking barely breathe. This guy will throw you back on his back and fucking, this is what you got to do. Put your hand here. See how easy this was? And that's the camaraderie. You're never going to get anyone. And then next door, you know, you're next door eating a smoothie. That's the shit you did when you went to high school and played basketball or football

afterward. Eight guys go next door and sit, you know, and that's what you provide. that's a if you walk into a lot of jihadistos schools they don't have that they when you were there you were confident because at lunchtime there were three nurses two doctors i knew i wasn't going to die three Filipino nurses bad motherfuckers you know what I'm saying the little chubby brown belt he's now a black belt that was my brother shout out he would come run Ron Ron Ron and then the woman who was a purple and Jeanette and then black belt now yeah there was the thin guy how you into day, Mr. D.S., he was the thin guy. Gus, Gus.

He came in with a bag, 10 after 12. Gus, Gus, yeah. And then he became Superman. He came with these greasy glasses. I mean, right back. And then he'd come back in, you know, and it's dynamite. You're like, fuck these guys coming at. Lunch time.

They're eating like a cracker with a sardine for lunch, running back in their car, eating it as they get in the car. And you're like, and I thought I had a hard day. You know, it's different, guys. I love what you provide. Thank you. Thank you. It means a lot, you know. I really appreciate you, uh, just being a part, you know, those years you were. Oh, man. I loved all that stuff. It's really great to just be here and your, in your, your side of the country, you know, in your neighborhood, you know. It means a lot,

really, after all these years. People come and go. One of the times I was really upset because, because dog, I don't go that much, but it would be an excuse for me. You weren't satin. You're 25 minutes from me. He was 25 minutes, and then he's dropping all this fucking Staten Island shit. Rico Rodriguez, you know, you saw to him yet? Who is that? Rico Rodriguez. I did. Yeah, he's out here now, right?

No shit. Have you spoken to him lately? I get pictures from him and calls from him and chokes from him and, hey, come visit me. I'm in Newark, but you got to come through the back door and you got to hide from the landlord. You got to climb down a latch, you know what I'm saying? You're like, that's what that last thing I want to do is got to. for going to trading jihitsen. Well, he's got a lot of art.

I love Rico. But I had no idea. He was from Staten Island. And what happened, his family was Italian. They adopted him. Just fucking tremendous story. We got to get him on here, but he's got to come in with a tamer. And no. He went to high school in Tottenville High School. I think Tottenville High School. I was Wagner High School. And his coach, his wrestling coach in high school was also the

soccer coach. I played soccer in high school. And so he's always trying to, actually Mike Bonnevita, that was just here, he was always trying to recruit him to train with Rico at Tottenville to have another heavyweight to train with him, you know? So it's like a small world, right? Kind of small world.

But it's crazy that, out of all the places, right, he's, Staten Island, we went to high school, the same, kind of the same areas. UFC champion, right? ADCC champion. I had no idea Staten Island was even involved in this game. And then my neighbor said to me, oh yeah, I went to high school of Rico.

He goes, let's call him up. I go, you got his number two? Holy shit, he gets into everybody. Yeah. But, Professor, you know, I've been here for going on in six years. We always stayed in touch. I follow your life dramatically on Facebook. That's the general pictures from legacy.

And, you know, I follow your Instagram. and there was like a year there where I think about you. About to pick up the phone, I learned, you know, he's in Japan with his family. Next thing you know, he's in Hong Tong jumping out of a plane with his family. Two days later, he's in Budapest. I would say, then he's in Burbank. Like nothing happened.

He's at the school for the lunchtime class. And you see those for three days, the geez, the party of legacy, the Christmas. All of a sudden, he's back in Armenia, teaching, Jiu-jitsu to fucking savages. And then, so for a while then, I'm like, how's he doing this? Eight schools, this, this? Well, one thing I know is you appointed your own train black belts at those schools. And they know what you teach and how you teach it.

And that's why you got that whole area on lockdown. And I congratulate you because I look. I saw you in Santa Fe. You saw me when I was 418 pounds. I couldn't even take my shoes off to go into your studio. I was just sit in the corner and he always come over. But let me tell you something. You walk, if you're a chubby dude,

walk into Jitza school 10 days in a row and watch how they'll talk to. It's no contract. Oh, get on the mat. I got a guy in the back. We got water. It's just me and you for 30 minutes. Let's do that. And by the way, that guy, like the first 20 minutes,

you're like, I'm not coming back. I'm not coming. Next you know, you're there for 45 minutes. And he's teaching you something new on how to be. breathe. And now you leave and you're like, I'm not coming back, but that guy was real. That dude was real. He cared for me.

He was supposed to be half hour. We're here now 15 minutes on his time. He's late to go pick up his kids. That's a guy who loves what he's doing. Like class would end up one, and he'd make me go to tactical fitness and throw my shoulders got loose. I still sweat in my mother's grave.

I did it the other day. The thing you taught me to do on the plane, you sit back, you put your shoulders down, and you extend your neck, you do that 20 times. And then the other one, you take your fucking neck and touch your chin 20 times. He told me to get up and just hold the seat in front of you and wiggle your hips and change your leg and press the cap because the calf was the heart of the lower leg. Come on, bro. Who the fuck you get dealing with?

You know what I'm saying? You swing some club bells. You got the club bells? Yeah. No, I do the clubbell still to warm up. Yeah. You know, I don't know. I know I go on the swings, but.

Do you try? You're doing it. You're doing it. I do the stretches. Now I believe how much since then my shoulders are very, a lot more. I got to warm them up. You know, like tomorrow I'll go to boxing. I'll get warmed up.

And then I'll do that. A couple like 10. I'll do the swings and the fucking knees things. Now they're saying if you're doing it to the side, you lose your side fats. I'm getting ready for bikini season, Jack. Before we go, the name of the book is All In by Alberto Crane. Life Lessons on and All. I know this man personally and I don't need to read the book.

I know the story, but when I'm recovering from knee surgery, this is the first book on the list because I can't fucking go nowhere. So all in lessons. I bona fide. You know, I love my books. I love this. I love that he did this, that he had the courage to do this and everything. I'm not blowing smoke up your ass.

This guy's the real deal. Holyfield. Where can they find this, though? All the platforms, Amazon, Barnes & Noble's online. It goes on sale. guess what? Oi, today. How do you say today in Yiddish?

Oy, yeah. Oye, you know, like, Ory, Ory, three little, whatever. Anyway, it doesn't matter. Amazon, what else, my brother? Aparse and Ombles, yeah, all the, all the platforms. Audio and the audio?

It's coming soon. Who did the voice? That's AI. I read, I, I, fucked up. Oh, AI. Well, it's not, you want to do it yourself.

What's my voice? It's actually, I don't know, pretty, pretty damn good. It's not done yet. I need for you to feel their heart. Okay, okay, I got you. Whatever's written here, you have to stop for a minute and just go, fuck. Okay. Let me do it because now you gave them something extra.

Okay. On the book. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. You're right. Fucking give you all for three days in a row. You know, things happen. Yeah, no, I did great with mine because of that reason I did it.

People already used to you from your podcast, which you still have your podcast. Yeah. You know, I want you to send all my love to the students. life. Let's promote Joey's Alvarado's last album. What do you think? You're saying? That's my boy, Joey Alvarado and shit, swinging kettlebells. Like he owes me 22 bucks.

What do you got left, dog? What do you got this year? Wednesday, we're with Pedro, I think, in Garfield, New Jersey. Friday and Saturday, and with Jessamy Paluso in Fort Worth. Look at you as shit. Taking it back to Texas. And then first and second at Uncle Vinnie's. Uncle Vinny's and Point Pleasant. Forget about it. Me, I got, hmm, oh shit.

I'm doing the first April Fool's Day at West Nyack. I'm doing the ninth at motherfucking, the dojo. And then I'm doing the 15th in Brooklyn. The 18th, I'm in Nashville at the Nashville Comedy Festival. Then the 23rd of April, write it down. I'm telling you all to suck my dick because I'm having surgery. So I won't see you for a couple weeks. You know what I'm saying?

I'll be busy drinking tequila with my leg up, getting a massage, Jamaican woman, you know, looking for a Jamaican woman. I don't care how big you are. Come over and just massage my leg. We watch CNN and, you know, lean to the right. You know what I'm saying? They're going to fuck they're leading in these type of days. Don't forget, seriously, from my heart.

All in. Lessons on and off the mat, Professor Alberto Crane and Mexel, Duke's Lambe. That's it. It works. I love you guys. Amazon. Right now, click it, pre-order it. Is there a code?

They get 10 cents off? I had something. Hit me up on mess on Instagram. All right. Tell him that you saw him Uncle Joey and this will work something out. You might not get the whole book. He sent me the other book. That's the book. And then he gives me a new one. I'm like, you gave me the switcher route. You know what I'm saying? But I love you, Professor. God bless you. Thank you for being my brother.

Thank you guys. Thank you so much.