The Comedy Cellar: Live from the Table - Moses Storm

Episode Date: October 15, 2022

Moses Storm is a writer, comedian and actor. His multiple television appearances inlclude the NBC comedy SUNNYSIDE, I’M DYING UP HERE on Showtime, ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT for Netflix and THIS IS US on NBC. His first comedy special, Trash White was produced by Conan O'Brien and is avaialble on HBO Max.

This is Live from the Table, a Comedy Cellar-affiliated podcast. Coming to you on SiriusXM 99 Raw Dog and on the Laugh Button Podcast Network, this is Dan Natterman. With me via Zoom, coming from his home in Westchester, I presume, is Noam Dorman, the owner of the world-famous Comedy Cellar. Welcome, Noam. That's me, Dan i i feel like archie bunker what are you doing in my chair well you're not here so i took the chair and there's not much you can do about it from all right and ardsley can you hear me well we hear you perfectly fine also here miss perriel ashenbrand author comedian as well as the producer some say of our show others would say she is

uh more of a booker but uh either way here she is perry alash and brand and of course we have uh the sound engineer the finest one in town miss nicole lyons behind the scenes she doesn't say a lot but when she does you can be sure it's worth hearing. How's everybody? I'm okay, Dan. All my kids have the flu, but my son's curriculum is whack. Are you at home because of the flu?

Because your kids are sick and you... I don't know. My kids have the flu. I've been leaving them. My son has 104 fever it's crazy i need to be home with my kids well that's it that sounds like a pretty high fever but i guess for a kid 104 is not as bad as it would be for an adult this is ben that has the 104 the youngest one yeah but they but they've all they've all been sick uh um it's crazy it's like it's crazy

well that's parenting for you and i'm sure Perrielle has stories like that. She only has one kid, of course. I want to know who takes issue with calling me the producer. Well, we've had that discussion. No one had some misgivings about that title for you, thinking that it maybe wasn't...

Well, Perrielle, you tell us what a producer does, and I will tell you whether you qualify. Go ahead. Big shot. us what a producer does, and I will tell you whether you qualify. Go ahead, big shot. What does a producer do? I, first of all, I guess first and foremost, I deal with the bickering back and forth between the two of you and try to keep the balance of the show.

So that means enough comedians to keep Dan happy and enough journalists and professors. And that's what a producer does. I'm not finished keeping the balance of the show. Yeah, that's one of the things. Then I book all of the guests. I see you. So you're also the booker.

I am also the booker. I keep the calendar of the show. I also have to email and text message you multiple times a week to make sure that you've looked at the calendar. I research the guests. I field hundreds of emails from you. Okay, fair enough. You convinced me. You can be a producer.

What else might a producer do in your mind that Perrielle's not doing? A producer... I'm not finished with the list of things that I do. I also contribute

handsomely to the show. Step in when people are missing. Sometimes, you know, Noam doesn't show up. I'll step up. I think that probably in my three years now of doing this, other than when I'm in Israel, I probably have missed maybe one episode. So I'm here. No one's quarreling with your attendance record. But, Noam, I had asked you the question, what might a producer be doing that Peril's not doing, in your mind? I think a producer, I mean, I know a producer does. I thought a producer oversees the technical aspects of a show

um well I do liaise decision but you know what Perry I stand corrected you are a producer thank you okay well I guess we've um we've put that to bed Noam I do want to give you a compliment I don't know if you want to discuss your kids curriculum but I want to give Noam a compliment uh the band on Monday was it's always very good but I want to give noam a compliment uh the band on monday was it's always very good but i want to specifically note that you're they've integrated a new song into their repertoire just as a review every monday night noam and his band play music at the comedies at the restaurant upstairs from the comedy cellar so they they've integrated a new song into the repertoire bohemian rhapsody of course queen classic uh excellent well done uh you got all

the parts in there i was like i was thinking when you started saying that this is going to be an utter disaster because it's such i thought it was a disaster so the first second time we actually um um performed it live and i and i didn't think it was very good but um the only thing is is it's hard like some of the parts without a keyboard seem like all right this is very tough to do without a keyboard but i think you did as well as you could no that's not the problem well the percussionist forgot uh we had an arrangement percussionist forgot the arrangement and um there's a lot of vocal parts they're very very it's like we have to play it i would say nine or ten more times and then uh i think you could you then you could judge it well maybe this is something only a

musician would know it sounded pretty good to me. Other than the fact that I'm like, I think this could use a keyboard. You know, some of the stuff with the guitars didn't sound right, but vocally I thought it was good. The part where you went. Was that good? I thought it was very good. Yeah.

I thought it was quite good. And again, I was like saying, oh my God, this is going to be horrible because it's so hard to do. But I thought it was good anyway. I don't know if anybody else complimented you or said anything. Not on that song. We had two different customers tell me that we made them cry. They were so moved by it.

Tears of joy, I gather. Yeah, the music was really good on Monday. Please welcome American writer, actor, and comedian who's appeared in film, television, and radio. This is just from Wikipedia. From Kalamazoo, Michigan, Moses Storm is here. I don't know why the emphasis is on American. Well, that's just what I read in the Wikipedia.

Moses supposes his toes are roses, but Moses supposes erroneously. Moses supposes his toes aren't roses, as Moses supposes his toes to be. You know this, Moses? I just know the dance, the full choreography, and I will be doing it. Moses Storm is a new comedy seller comic. I guess he's been here about a year. No, even less, I think. Even less.

July. Still very green. Still nervous to perform here still but don't be nervous noam told us before you got here that he really likes you and and so i think you're you're pretty well well well i mean this is the thing um dan uh dan wanted you very badly on the podcast i was happy to have you on of course but uh but dan said something he's never said about any other comic in my life with him. Dan thinks you're going to be a big star. You really, you've never said that. Well, I have said that. I think I said that about Jordan Jensen. I said,

I didn't say she's going to be a big star. I think I said, I think there's a reasonable chance. I think most, yes, I think Moses, I think Moses has what it takes. I didn't, I don't know if those were my exact words, but Moses is young. He's good looking. He's got a good back story and he's already making some noise. So putting those things together, that was my conclusion.

I can't predict that with certainty, of course. Right. But you don't say it to a lot of people. So I don't say it. I've never heard him say it. Anybody. And he did. And he also said it supportively. He like he didn't say it like you lot of people. Well, I don't say it to a lot of people. I've never heard him say it to anybody. And he also said it supportively. He didn't say it like you would normally say that. I didn't say it at all. The L.A. way where it's like, yeah, this guy's going to be.

I don't think I said it at all. I think I emailed. So you couldn't tell what tone of voice I was using because I was emailing. I was gritting my teeth as I was doing so. It's all in italics. Every time I tell people that we lived in a converted bus growing up, especially in L.A.,

people are like, oh my God, cute. I love that for you. Because I think you are picturing the HDTV version of a bus where it's like a young couple from Portland. Something's a little off in their relationship. And everybody's like,

hi, I'm Tracy and my husband also named Tracy. We fixed up this old bus because we stopped having sex and large construction projects are the only way that I know how to make the time move. Those are

great. Those buses are great. They're built with time, money, and sexual frustration that crushes it into a diamond. The bus that my parents built with no skill, no money, I would love to see an HGTV show

realtor try to sell it. You know those ones that have the kind of plastic surgery where it looks like the wind hurts? All right, Greg Donovan, I know you were looking for a two-bedroom, two-bath. Instead, I want to show you this no-bedroom, no-bath, hot diesel tube that has more miles on it than we are currently to the sun.

Immediately, you're gonna notice this diesel smell. I don't know how carbon monoxide leaks work. I just know that sometimes you'll be driving, all the air will get wavy, and you'll wake up in a new state. Oh, it's mountains now. Moses is, but his backstory is that he grew up in a cult,

in an unsuccessful cult. Because I think the follow-up question is, people are always like, well, which one? Is there a Netflix special about it? But no, it just it never worked out. They never had any followers. So it was just you guys.

There was three families in the cult total. And my mom, my mom's great. My mom's uncle. So my great uncle is the one that actually started it. It's maybe the head of this religion church. And then my mom got my dad involved in it. And then there was a third family that was in Texas. And each of us lived in a bus, like a Greyhound bus, not a tour bus, but a bus that they tried to convert

into an RV. It was never the quality of what you would see on HGTV where there's like cabinetry work and there's working plumbing. It was just like a hellhole, just a hot diesel tube. And we would travel state to state, city to city and street breach. So I'll be on the street as young as two. My earliest memory is like with large neon signs, screaming hellfire at people and witnessing for God. And the government never stepped in and said, well, this kid needs to be put in a foster home. No, I mean, that's kind of the bummer about it is that no one cared. FBI didn't care. They never got big enough to ever be a problem.

If any official like, yeah, well, no one's going along with that. So we were never a news. But you were living in a bus with no plumbing on the street that didn't attract the attention of the authorities at all. People would yell at us in the street, never authorities, but people were like, how could you do this to your kids? When we would when we would, I guess, protest or street preach at spring break, people would would pee in bottles and throw it at us. You're like, why aren't your kids in school? Because I've never been to school in my life. And a few times CPS would come a little bit later on. CPS. Child protection services.

Yeah. But it was less about the cult stuff. And it's like when the cult kind of fell apart and my parents went their separate ways, then my mom was very stressed with these five kids and no child support. And then CPS became a regular fixture in our life. But you never lived in a foster home, though. You lived. No, parents. That was the thing. That was the your mother. My siblings would always talk about running away when we were sentient enough to be like, well, this is obviously not right. Forget the ideology. Every time we're in Walmart,

every time or anywhere, people are yelling at us and saying that is obviously not right. Forget the ideology. Every time we're in Walmart, every time we're anywhere, people are yelling at us and saying that this is not right. And it's never going well. And my older brother, I remember him pulling us aside. Like, we can't run away because then we're going to go into foster homes and no one's going to adopt five kids. We won't get to stay together. So if we just ride it out, if we just hang around,

then we can at least stay together was the idea i i would like more information what what what makes it a cult it was obviously a christian a christian christian-based cult it was a mix of judaism and catholicism um i get i think extreme beliefs i was very anti-government, anti-school, anti-establishment. I didn't go to a hospital until I was 20. We were all home births. And it was focused around the book of Revelation. So heavy doomsday cult. This is all going to be over. Why would you need to get a good job? Why would you need to save money? Why would you need to teach your kids how to read if this is all going to be over in like 45 minutes. But now we usually think of cults being led by some kind of cynical phony like L. Ron Hubbard or Jim.

Jim was named Jones of Jones. Yeah. Where the guy at the top is profiting in some way, either with money or sexually or whatever it is from his followers. But you're describing this was a sincere belief thing. I definitely think that the cult leader, and usually they're much more charismatic than my great uncle. He was pretty off putting. If you saw him just as a comic, you wouldn't be rooting for him on stage.

And I think intimidation was probably his best thing, but he wasn't hot for lack of a better term. And a lot of cult leaders are, they're at least like offbeat, like Jared Leto hot, where at least it's like, oh, I get it.

I get why you would want approval from someone that is attractive. He wasn't attractive, short, fat, balding man, thick, thick Michigan accent. And he was,

he was a college football star when he got hurt. That's when he found God. That's when God told him that you are you are the true prophet. So if I had to guess, oh, you're just trying to continue this identity. You still want to be a star. You know, your football career is over. You're not going to go to the NFL with the torn ACL. So maybe being the leader of this cult would be an identity that could feed your ego. So you were homeschooled? That's even generous.

Because I know people that are homeschooled and they can't read. So you're saying you can't read? I learned. Eventually I learned. You read better than our dear friend Phil Hanley? Yes, a little bit better. But I'm also dyslexic and dysgraphic so those two on top of no education because there's great programs if you are dyslexic

there's like sylvan learning center and if you act you can do it right but it was all those three things put together now now obviously this kind of street preaching is a great training round for being a performer, correct? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, there was never a problem. I mean, writing always needs work, but there was never a problem getting on stage and projecting. It's a lot less nerves because at least it feels like audiences, especially here, are rooting for you to do well and they want it to be a good show and i think when you come in and you have big neon signs that say like you're headed for hell yeah god saves the world is gonna burn like that is you're already starting from a negative standpoint and now do you believe in god still no i don't i don't have anything. I think the closest thing, if I could choose, it would be Judaism.

But yeah, I just I agree with the tenants, but I've never fully on board in something. And it's pretty embarrassing because I do wish I had something. Have you been well, me and me and no one don't have anything. I mean, we yeah, well, we're Jewish by birth, but we don't believe in it. But you're culturally Jewish. Yes. But no, but but but Moses could.

And facially. If he wants to. Moses, you're not allowed to say that. But if most of you want to be culturally something, you can certainly do it. Yeah. You don't have to believe in it. You want to come over for Noam's house for Seder next year? Yeah.

I think I think what he's saying. You can read the four questions. I mean, yeah. Or you can. I don't know if you read. I think you're saying you're saying that you you crave some spirituality in your life. Is that what you're saying? Yeah, I crave I get I totally understand why people why religion works for me. It gives answers for the unanswerable. Well, unfortunately, the answer is this. Doomed. But doomed and there's nothing? Yeah.

Unfortunately, that is the answer. Have you been reading my family's signs? But your family believe that even that we're doomed, but that we're going someplace after. Yes. So that's where we part ways. I believe we're just plain doomed.

So it's just dust. You're nothing. That's what I believe. Yes. I think that is likely correct. I don't believe that. I don't believe there's energy, and energy has to go somewhere. Right, because energy can either be created or destroyed.

Yeah, your atoms will live on, if that's any consolation. But your what? But your consciousness likely will not. Right. But you're only 35 years old. So, you know, it's not so bad for you. 32. I've been burning the candle at both ends.

Do you have. Hopefully you have some time left. Do you have like a death wishes? Meaning like, oh, I'm going to be cremated. I want to. Oh, like a final. I don't have any final. What do they call that?

Final arrangements in your will. No. What are your wishes? I don't have a will. I don't have a will. But no, there's in the will, it's called something where you, well, no, you have a will. So I assume you, you, are they putting you in a box or, or, or burning you up? Oh, I don't think it's in my will, but I would like to be buried. Well, when my father was, my father died, Ava,

my father's wife, bought me a plot next to him. So I have a plot but now I have my family and my wife, so I don't know. It's just another thing that I'm going to fight with my wife about. Well, if you don't believe in anything,

why do you need to be buried next to your family? That doesn't make any, if you don't believe in anything, why do you need to be buried next to your family? That doesn't make any sense. I don't think you do. If I don't believe in anything, nothing matters. I agree with you

that if you nevertheless, somehow I do care. I do care somehow. I can't say it matters, but I do care. I do care somehow. I can't say it matters, but I do care. You don't have these laundry lists for people.

I want to be cremated. I want you to take my ashes to this spot in Hawaii and spread it here. You're not going to be around for that, so why would it matter? It wouldn't matter, but just the idea of being buried to me is creepy. Not that I'll know.

But yeah, everything that's everything creepy about death is burial related. Coffins, skeletons, tombstones. It's all the cremation. You were you. You don't have to deal with any of that. Right. Well, you're not dealing with any of it anyway, because you're not going to be here. That's correct. But I'm in thinking about it. What makes me uneasy is burial. Yeah. And the fact that your body's just rotting and there's this fear that

what if you came to life and then you had died? And the reason people are dead is because they're buried. I think the embalming is what freaks me out. And I mean, the Jews don't do this. You just go right into a wooden box. But when you have like the open coffin and they like shoot you full of like formaldehyde and put makeup on you. They did that for my my grandpa. I was like, why?

Why are we doing? Yeah, the grandpa that was the cuddly. No, no, just my grandpa. He's actually the cult leader's brother. And they did not talk their entire lives. And I was really nervous because this happened maybe two years ago. I was nervous that the cult leader was going to show up to honor his dead brother. But he didn't.

Did you have a sense growing up that this really sucks? Or were you like, oh, this is my life and I don't have a sense one way or the other? No, it was definitely this sucks all the time because there was there was there's yelling, there's abuse, there's just struggle of poverty. Seeing my parents frustrated, that's never working out, always moving. We would get evicted from places and they were like, well, it was God's will that we got evicted. Now that's why we're going to Panama City, Florida. And from an early age, I had that thought. I think everyone comes to me like, oh, my parents, they don't got this.

So how poor were you? Can you give us an example of just how dire the poverty was? Yeah, so our main food source, because food stamps really wouldn't cover, is we would dumpster dive for food. I would say, without exaggerating, 80% of our food came from the grocery store dumpster. So we just you go back in the grocery store, whatever they throw out that's expired or is

about to expire. You take that and hopefully there's something in there that's not rotten, but maybe the expiration date is past. So it's usually just like a lot of one thing. It's either all fried chicken or it's all beets or it's all hostess cupcakes. So some great things. As a kid, you must have enjoyed the hostess cupcake. Yeah. Yeah. There was.

We weren't allowed to eat, though. You see, in my house. So who had it tougher? Right. Were you allowed to eat trash? I never asked. How old were you? So, you know, you always hear stories about people who are very poor.

We were so poor. We didn't know. We were happy. We didn't know. It doesn't sound like that's the case no how old were you before you were cognizant of the fact that the way you were growing up was was not okay um well i was aware that we were poor pretty early on because my mom would constantly get caught shoplifting from multiple walmarts, like to the point where there's honestly her Polaroid in Walmart and she would go back and steal that same one.

And then I would be sitting with her when she gets pulled to the manager's office and they're waiting on the cops. And then so she would give this whole sob story. Really how I learned how to perform is from her. And she had a single mom. I have all these kids. You can't do this to me. And I'm just trying to make ends meet uh we were so poor and then she would lay out the facts so i think that is really how i found out we were that poor um and i think a lot of she wasn't bullshitting what she was saying was true correct uh yes you'd play it up she would definitely perform you know definitely like if you get a speeding also when you were watching TV and you're like, wait a minute, these people have it.

We were not allowed to watch TV. OK, we did somehow see the O.J. Chase. We had a TV, but yeah, it was only for religious tapes because my great uncle would he would do keyboard music and he would he would sing the sermons sometimes with like a talk sing. And where were you in the five kids? Second to youngest. So my other siblings, things did not work out. I think they had it a little bit harder than I did.

And they're having a harder time coping with it in adulthood. And I just got lucky just to see them make mistakes, see what it was like if you ran away, see what it'd be like if you tried all the drugs in the world and it not working out. So just by the benefit of the lineup, I was able to

avoid some things. And when when were you on your own? When did you go out on your own and start making your own money and escape from all that? The cult fell apart around 2001 because it was connected to the Andrew Yates story. Andrew Yates believed that God was going to save her kids if she killed her kids. And that was a pretty big trial. And it put a lot of heat on the religion and on the cult. So everyone was laying low at that point. Like, we're not going to go out and yell at people for this.

Andrew Yates drowned five five children. Was that the story? It was all over the news, right? Yeah. Because because God told her to do it. That's right. And which is something I always heard growing up is that you're born pure. And then as you get older, your sin nature corrupts you.

So, yeah, that was that was hard to swallow. But there was a little part of me i was like jealous of those kids they did it and then 2001 same time my parents marriage has already fallen apart this another blow of this very national trial i made it was the biggest story of 2001 before the biggest story of 2001 and then our our cult leader came back into the picture after not seeing him laying low for five years. He came back into the picture and essentially gaslit my mom and was like,

what are you doing? Why are you living this way? It's so poor. You guys need to get jobs in the workforce. So then I got a job at a grocery store because they had a trash compactor, which means like she couldn't dumpster dive at that one. It'd be so humiliating.

Oh, my God, your mom's out back. So I kept applying at this one store because they had a trash compactor. And then then I was around kids my age for the first time, like 16, 17. Wow. But I still fully believe in the cult, even though we had talked about running away, even though it was hard, even though it was like your parents are crazy. I 100 percent believed in their definition of God. I believed at that point I was going to hell. I was still writing letters to God and apologizing and trying not to masturbate, trying. And then

then I fell in love with this girl at the grocery store who was just a very intelligent person. She's now a double PhD. And just hearing what I believed said back to me by her, someone I respected and, you know, you're horny, you're a teen. And just a really smart and sweet person. And just hearing what I believe said out loud and her absorbing that information

was enough to deprogram me. Wow. And that was enough. Yeah. Oh, okay. Yeah, that's all bullshit. Yeah. I have another question.

I hope you don't mind. It's just fascinating. So you grew up very, very poor and deprived. Like you have like vivid recollections, like the first time you went to a nice restaurant, like these, these, these things were so delayed for you. Right. Yeah. I actually got fired from my first restaurant job because we did not spend

time in restaurants growing up. So I didn't understand the rotation of, of, of servers and how they're like, Oh, you can't just seat everyone over there. So they did all the training and it was Mexicali. It was on Ventura. It's like when I finally moved out here and everyone's hot there and everyone's dating. It's like one of those places where and it was very busy. And then there's a lot of TV celebrities there.

And my very first week I got I got fired. I did the training. I finished it to my first shift. And I just couldn't understand that you would need to spread people out, that there's an order to just the plates, the check coming out. You just felt like everything. Yeah, buddy. Buddy, what are you, an idiot? Have you been to a restaurant before?

We would go, but it was so conditional. I remember went to a Marie Callender and the most humiliating experience in my life. It was it was my younger sister's birthday. This is like a sad Norman Rockwell painting. And the server came out and we're all sitting there. There's now there's the six of us sitting down at one table and we order one, one piece of cornbread with the candle in it and the server keeps going up do you like sure you don't want anything you know and i know i do not want anything

no i'm stopped but we're just gonna get that and the server so bummed that this six top is now you should still know him when he brings his his uh kids out to dinner yeah the uh the uh well it's i mean the contrast i'm saying is rather striking. Between the way his kids are being raised and the way you were. I mean, that's what I would do now. If I had kids, I would fill up the table.

Moses, you have a girlfriend now? I do, yeah. I was just thinking that this isn't, like, you cannot not close a deal with a story like this. Right. You know, I had it so hard, but there is something that would make me feel better. What are you going to talk about?

Don't worry, I got this. The fact that it looks like a young Johnny Depp is not hurting. Yeah, it's a Kirkland brand johnny depp this is a this is a jet the costco brand we fell off either as it may um but yes i think that the most harmful part of growing up that way is now is my adulthood now it is you are right norm that is i think like oh it's a weird thing your parents do you kind of just accept it but something like having a girlfriend where you really do have to open up you really do have to be vulnerable you have to show them who you are you're not performing on stage then then all the religious dogma the isolation because if you're not going to school you're isolated from

kids your age all that stuff is manifesting so i as I would say, it's harder now being out alone than it was just the day to day in it. Have you done like severe therapy like PTSD? Like, have you gone through any of that? No, you might want to. You might want to. I've done some therapy, but not enough. And it's a little embarrassing to say that.

But yeah, I've noticed comics are all talking about therapy now. Yeah. 20 years ago, nobody talked about being in therapy. Now every comic is going to help you. What's that? Maybe Woody might have done it, but I'm just noticing I could just watching comics here. Many of them have therapy jokes.

It's become sort of in now to talk about. Right. And depression is. Yeah. Maybe Gary Gole now to talk about. Right. And depression is. Yeah, maybe Gary Goleman opened the door. I don't know that. Maybe Gary Goleman was the the one that did it. But everybody seems to be talking about mental illness. He went from state abbreviations to. No, nobody followed suit on the state abbreviation,

but everybody seems to be following him at the mental illness thing. Well, Alubel, Alabelle has that documentary mentally al such a great yeah although alabelle the mentally al um documentary doesn't really get into like clinical mental illness it's just you know you just see him as kind of the quirky weird guy yes i guess it was a trend in specials for maybe the past five years is that you needed you needed to exploit your your tragedy whatever the one thing that happened you needed to exploit it's a harsh word but really lean into that you couldn't just do well-written jokes like like you can't do here your special had to have this this moment this great tragedy

and i think the good comedians well many did not everyone but no but it was a trend as far as like what's being written about if you look at just like what's what's what's on twitter and what's uh where articles being written about it was it was mainly leaning well hannah gadsby in particular that was that was one of them that which i think by the most extreme example was fine but it was like everyone trying to copy that or be like oh that's handles that's just a one-woman show we'll show you how to do it i think that's where we maybe fell short a little bit because the focus was the tragedy and not just the is it funny well i mean it's you know noam and i have a similar

opinion about the gadsby special and then that that I guess it was called. Yeah, not not that funny, but certainly engaging. It's and it's her. It was honest to her. It was great for them. And yeah, I think it was the people that got jealous of Hannah's success that kind of tried to do their own thing. It's watered down version of it. And then those were some of the worst specials ever, because you can't just bump people out.

You have to you have to dig people out. You can say something that has levity, something that's hard, but you have to have the skill as a comic. This is why I don't talk about the murders on stage, because I'm just not talented enough as a comedian right now. To take people out with my. The in our cult, my way, it fell apart with. Yeah, I'm not talented enough to pull

off child murder but i'm trying i agree with you about hannah guys we've talked about it before but it's always i i really didn't like the um the hate that she got from a lot of the comedians i don't know if it was jealousy because i know the comedians tend to be also very technical snobs like they you know that they they think that comedy should be done this way and they don't like props and they don't like this and they and they were very you know very important to them that to define whether it was or wasn't comedy as opposed to just appreciating the fact that she did something that touched a nerve that bubbled up to wide,

to a wide audience without any hype or Madison Avenue promotion, whatever it was, this was basically a word of mouth thing. And it's always been my opinion in any, whether it comes music or movie or whatever it is that you have to respect that, you know, when, when something catches on, like, you know, it comes to my mind for some reason, like the first Batman movie with Michael Keaton, you know, when something catches on. Like, you know, it comes to my mind for some reason, like the first Batman movie with Michael Keaton,

you know, it got all, it was so, there was so much hype about it, and then there was covers of Newsweek and Time, and everybody's like, oh, this is so good, it's so good. But it hasn't stood the test of time at all. It just really wasn't that good. But somehow you can kind of pull the wool over sometimes with enough. And knowing him as a club owner,

if a comic goes on stage and doesn't kill, doesn't get huge laughs. Are you willing to entertain the possibility that maybe that comic is, is engaging nonetheless. It's harder to judge as a comedy club owner, somebody that's just engaging, but not killing with big laughs. I can, I can now, I can absolutely judge that and i'm actually i don't want to say names there's some comedians

at the club who um i feel that way but if i go in the room and i find myself you know really drawn in and listening to every word and not bored and i'm a very easily bored person i've never been to a broadway show that i wish hadn't ended at the end gone in and listening to every word and not bored. And I'm a very easily bored person. I've never been to a Broadway show that I wish hadn't ended at the intermission. I really don't have a lot of interest in a lot of things, but if somebody can hold my attention for 10 or 15, then I will likely want to use that person.

I mean, if they go for laughs and there's no response from the audience, then they're striking out. That's awkward. I will mention a name because he's a big enough name. It's Al Franken, I felt that way about. Al Franken would come here. Do you mind if I mention the name now no don't mention al franken but no it's too late

it's fine i don't care about um i felt that way about al franken he wasn't annihilating the way a lot of comedians annihilate the way the huge laughs that a lot of comedians will get he you know i haven't seen him here in a while but i was like this is really interesting how often do you have a u.s senator on stage first of, talking about going to Washington, his initial experiences meeting, you know, the senators, you know, his experience in Congress. I thought, wow, this is pretty interesting. I think the audience probably would agree, though. I couldn't necessarily tell because they weren't it wasn't howls that that I'd like to get on stage. I like to hear those howls. You want to hear my opinion of the Al Franken thing? Yeah, of course we do.

So my opinion was this. The first time he came down, I thought it was exactly what you said. And I think part of that was because he hadn't been on stage for so long. And he had a... His pace was... Let's say his pace was a 10. He's a little bit faster.

He had, he was a nervous, like staccato-ness to him. He was hyped for Al Franken. And, and there was a certain electricity to it. I went back three weeks later and if his pace had been a 10, he was now a 7.5. He was a little bit slower, a little.5 he was a little bit slower a little bit less energetic a little bit less uh snappy and i no longer felt that same energy in the room i thought it got a little bit lax a little bit loose not to the point where we stopped using him but well you couldn't stop using him though he was too big a name no we didn't stop well we can't stop using well no though. He was too big a name. No, we didn't stop using him. Well, we can't stop using him. Well, no, we could, but I still thought on the whole it was a plus to have a U.S. Senator, to have a celebrity, and he is funny. I mean, the guy's a talented guy,

but there was something about when he first came, when his own mood was super alert that I thought was better. As a club owner, I have to just sense that. That's magic in the air. You can't prove it one way or another, right? Yeah. Do you think it's the time that he took off from it?

If you're not working? I know if you take two days off, you feel a little wonky getting back on stage. I know as a musician off you feel a little wonky getting back on stage i know like as a musician there's there's a there's a mat like you learn a song and you do it and you know first couple times it's you go and then and then it clicks and then the next like 10 times you do it it's just awesome and then it loses the novelty of a new song in some way i'm sure it's the same way with material yes and then imperceptibly somehow you don't enjoy doing it as much as you did and lo and behold the

audience then stops enjoying it as much as they did previously and you can't prove why i suppose you a b recordings you might be able to hear this breaks a little harder they don't like you can't prove why i suppose you a beat recordings you might be able to hear this breaks a little harder you know like you can look and you can probably find the differences but it's they're not apparent to you when you're performing except that in some way like i would tell the guys in my band like you can't do a sad song if you can't conjure sadness in yourself you can't do a happy song if you're not feeling happy and that's just the way it is and you can't perform that set of yours

unless you're really enjoying it and it's hard to keep enjoying it if you've done it a hundred times, right? So yes, it's really deep, this stuff, but it's real. Yeah, you definitely feel that. There's something that it could be your strongest

bit or closer whatever people like it and they even would have even asked for it at some shows if like you're gonna do this one and if you just don't have the same excitement yeah you can feel it you could hit it exactly right you could be as loud as quiet but there is yeah there is a feeling to it there is some sort of energy well i wonder if like uh i mean i'm obviously it's the same with big stars you know when billy joel is doing piano man he i mean he must be thinking himself oh good christ you know this again right but um you know i don't know if it's perceptible on a conscious level to the audience but it's hard to imagine he's been doing that song for 50 years not quite 50 years but 40 years maybe maybe 50 yeah i mean at this point it's not what it was

at this point he's got to be just utterly sick of it well he listen when you're when you're super famous like billy joel you have one advantage which is the crowd is you they don't need you to give up to create energy in them they're so fucking hyped there's so much energy in madison square garden for billy jo Joel that he can get carried, you know, carried away in that. It's like, you know, if your sexual partner is really, really into it, you know, you might get into it too.

But I'm sure that if you, I'm sure he's not the Billy Joel that he once was with those old songs. I'm sure there's something or maybe. Well, sometimes you can't even hear the song. I mean, that's an interesting point. Sometimes you can't even hear the song. That's an interesting point. Sometimes you can't even hear the song because the audience is so loud at these concerts and he's singing

an old favorite. I'll tell you this related story just because it's kind of related and then we'll go back to Moses. My friend Sasha, who sings with the Rolling Stones, who sings with us on Monday nights now, I asked her, I said, do the Rolling Stones still rehearse? I mean, you're doing Satisfaction for 50 years.

Like, you know, what's going on? More than 50 years. And she says to me, rehearse. She says they rehearse. Keith Richards records the rehearsals. Then he goes back and listens to the recordings. And then he goes to the Stones and he gives them notes on what they're doing and not doing correctly. So that comes

through if you can still keep that interest in the the quality of it i think then that helps motivate you to i don't know if richard is the exception necessarily or the rule regarding bands of that stature but i mean richard from what i hear he is like that he's a real band lead yeah i don't know i mean paul Paul McCartney is probably the same way. I mean, there's a reason these guys are on top of the world for 50, 60 years. That's not luck. You know, these are special, special talents. Yeah. It feels like Seinfeld has that. I don't know him at all,

but just observing from the outside, it feels like he has that obsession with work and listening to things back and shaving down words and not just like, oh, hope this goes well. It's so much about the written joke. Probably. We don't see a lot of Seinfeld around these parts. He never comes here.

Never. He doesn't come off. What were you about to say, Perry? I was about to say that I know that I'm generally not authorized to do this, but you guys are glossing over the fact that Moses threw out child murders. Yeah, I think he was referring to I think he was referring to that, that, that not in his own family, but to that case. Yeah, that case was connected to the same cult.

That was the third family. Well, that was your cult, though. Yeah. That was the third family in your cult. So they tried to bring my great uncle in. The defense was trying to call him in to say that this mentally ill woman who's also struggling with postpartum depression did it because of his influence. And they subpoenaed his tapes and his sermons that were on these cassettes. So that's when he got in touch with us to get our story straight he's like if they're reaching out just like don't say anything yeah oh i didn't know you

were that directly involved maybe i misheard you but i thought it was just that that the heat was on cults in general after that no it was just because of that uh it was one of the angles that the defense took but i don't think it's widely reported on that, that she was a part of a failing cult, which is like, it's not beneficial now. Cause now I have to describe what this cult is. And I get people on board to even care. Now this is obviously a book deal waiting to happen. Our dear friend that I mentioned earlier, Phil Hanley got a pretty good check.

I think for his book about dyslexia, that's nothing compared to your shit. Yeah. So why don't you have a book deal? I don't know if you want a book deal. I got to learn how to write. Oh, you'll find somebody to write for you. But somebody can do that for you. I can help you. Periel can do it.

She's a great typist. She does 60 words a minute. Yeah. I mean, it'd be great. I just don't I just feel really insecure about anything that's school related or left brain related. I think somebody can do that for you. The hardest part is the story.

Now you've got to pitch it to a publishing. I don't know what your financial situation is, but I think I could get you a hundred thousand dollar advance. I trust that coming from you. I don't know what the hell I'm talking about, but I don't need to take 20%. No, I take 20%. I'm not going to get you anything. I'm not going to get you anything,

but I think whoever your manager is or whoever any somebody that works with you is, yeah, could probably score that kind of money. I think I don't know you movie, obviously. I think I'm ready. I want first one thing at a time. But the book says, well, they won't deal with the movie. Get him in advance and then we'll talk. Then we'll talk.

I think the whole thing is I think now for the first time is why I'm talking about it publicly. I'm ready to take it on because I didn't want to just be my story. Didn't want to be just the sad thing. And then you're getting more of one person. Should talk to her bigly about producing you. Yeah. Oh, that. See, that would be great. That I would get really excited about. Judd Apatow. Judd Apatow told us directly in his own from his own mouth that he's more about the story than about the funny. Now, you're funny, too. But that's the reason he gave Gary Goleman a special. I when Gary Goleman got a special, I actually emailed him. I said, hey, you know, I, you know, wouldn't mind a special because because Judd Apatow produced it.

Yeah. Judd was like, well, my plate is full right now. But Judd said that the reason he gave produced Gary special because Gary had a great story about being depressed, about having, I think, electroshock therapy. That's right. Amy Schumer. He liked her story years ago when when he signed on with train wreck. He would surely like your story. I don't know if he if you've spoken to him or not, but no, no. And I mean, it's that's me. It's the first time I feel comfortable talking about it. Anyway, I feel more confident than ever that Moses has got some great things ahead of him. I can't guarantee stardom, but I do think. A hundred thousand dollars, you guarantee.

I can't guarantee you that either, but I think it's I think that at least 50. That's a 50 percent cut. Listen, this kid never went to school. He's not going to know. Now we're going to get you $1,000, kid. Now, do you, are you, are you have one of these savior comps? We were talking to Justin McKinney here a few weeks ago and his family is in pretty bad shape too. And he made some money early on

and he was so desperate to help out his family that he gambled, he didn't gamble. He, well, he sort of gambled. He put it all into these risky stocks because he wanted to save his family and he lost everything. Now he's back and he's doing okay, but is your family like you feel

like you need to be the savior of the family? Yes, sometimes, yeah. I don't do stocks, but I just send them money often and I have no safety net. There's no backup plan if everything goes to shit tomorrow. Well, the movie.

The movie and then we have a guarantee. What I'm trying to say is be careful when you get too anxious to save your family and you act imprudent. It's getting worse because I noticed that sometimes I'll take on relationships and it's not the current situation, current girlfriend, but people that maybe do have a lot of problems are a little out there because I don't have to focus on my own problems. If they're if they're more messed up, if I can say them, then I feel good about myself. And it's evidence that I've dug myself out of this hole of being this weird religious

cult kid. No friends hate and just strife. It feels like I'm out if I have not just I can afford a meal, but I can afford to give it to someone else. So I noticed a pretty bad pattern of trying to do that or looking for people that I could take care of. Yeah, but you said, OK, we have to get him a really good Jewish therapist. Yeah, that's what. Well, they cost 200 bucks an hour. Yeah, well, they're on a sliding scale.

Some are, some aren't. And. That'd be worth it. Yeah. Well, I don't know. It sounds like he's fairly well adjusted. Of course, I've only spoken to him for this hour, but he may not need therapy. Some people can actually get through those kinds of horrible situations

and still be in decent shape. Have you ever been psychologically? Of course I have. Yeah. And did you find it helpful? Not overwhelmingly. Not really. No, no. Look at the look on his face. I know I'm the therapist. No, he doesn't believe in therapy.

Is a skeptic. No, I feel like I got bored in it. I didn't know it's like dating. We have to find multiple ones. But I tried three and I was like, I guess therapy just doesn't work. No, no, no. Three people. But yeah, and it feels like this huge thing be able to do it. I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it.

I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it.

I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it.

I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. I don't that like I was entertaining in therapy. And I thought, why should I be paying the same money as somebody who's boring you for an hour when I'm telling you great stories? Right. My friend had a therapist who fell asleep while she was talking to him. And her brother was killed in September 11th. So it wasn't. He's like, heard it. So the coverage, you guys ever get that? It's it didn't mean it as like, heard it. It's all the coverage. Do you guys ever get that? It didn't mean it as a compliment, but sometimes it hurts.

We're like, oh, I fall asleep to your podcast. Oh, I never heard that, but that would be horrible. People do it because they have so much anxiety in their head that they'll put something on and it relaxes them to hear you talk. I think that if you have a problem with something, anger or, I don't know some kind of tick the cognitive kind of tick well phobias are can can be can be treated yeah i imagine there's some strategy to teach somebody to breathe or whatever it is so they don't lose their temper so i i'll give therapy that's therapy uh i'll give it that i also um

i don't know but but the idea of just you know talking about your problems i think is healthy but the idea that a therapist you know after from seven years of education has some you know scientific way to listen to your your problems and then tell you something that's good. I, I'm just very skeptical. No, I don't think that's what it is though. I think that. But there's also medication that is proven very helpful for people as well. Yes. I believe in medication. But I mean, I think it's a therapist, you know, gives a good therapist,

gives people tools to deal with the different things that they struggle with. I mean, I think oftentimes we get, we're so wrapped up in our own narrative. It's very difficult to zoom out and be objective and see our way out of that path. The problem is that you have five different therapists. I'll tell you five different things. It's just not scientific. I think that. And I keep telling you. It feels good to talk about your problems. That's fine.

But not everything has to be scientific to be valuable. No, but I'm saying you could talk to a friend. I don't know. I don't listen. A friend's probably not going to want to sit there and listen to you. And you probably won't necessarily want to confide in a friend all your deepest, darkest secrets. I mean, certainly Moses was forthcoming to us. But there's there's things he wouldn't he wouldn't tell us, but that he might tell a therapist.

I don't know. Maybe. Yeah. Yeah. I think it is. People like Norman, I try to argue our way out of therapy of like yeah no one is going to know exactly my situation have the best thing i do think it is conducive to talk out your problems say them out loud a lot of thoughts they don't hold their power anymore when you have to put it

into words and say it to another human being and personally that's how i was was deprogrammed is just having to say it out loud to someone that I had a crush on. It was simple as that. Now, your parents, they weren't the best parents, I guess, but they gave you that hair and you have to. It might go. I mean, my dad's got no hair and he's wearing bandanas and not pulling them off. He's not. Well, I would just say profit from the time they have left. I guess it comes from your mom's side. I think he had a great head of hair. My mom's grandpa, even when he was embalmed, it was glistening. I mean, you do have a joke in your act about that. You you grew up poor, but you look like an asshole rich kid. Yeah, I think there's some act. I think there's something to that. Yeah, that is the immediate

vibe. Even if I say I feel like, no, not him. You bought that story from someone. Your teeth are too good. Teeth are too. I should. If one thing should be off, like mess up a tooth. I need a scar or something. But yeah, that's a good title. Good teeth, good teeth. Like a Disney Channel villain.

Yeah, this is a bad boy in the Disney Channel. Yeah, I noticed that this feeling of being you learn a lot about yourself with how you're perceived at the second you get on stage and what people think of you. And yeah, it's immediately like, I can't yell immediately. I gotta be praying.

Hey, before we go, just because it's interesting. Does anybody have any comments about this new Kanye West thing with the anti-Semitic remarks and Tucker Carlson covering room, all that stuff? Well, that's a pretty big topic to get into as a in the last couple of minutes. People are trying to fall asleep.

He just understands how to be famous and how to keep attention. So he'll just say whatever's the most litigious thing. And I don't think he's got a lot of morals behind it. I think it's really just someone flailing in the wind that knows how to be an entertainer, even if it means people hate him. At least people are talking about him. Well, I don't I mean, he certainly knows how to keep his name in the headlines. I don't know if he would go that far just to keep his name in the headline.

I mean, it might just be that he's just not right in the head to say something that outrageous. Going death con three on the Jewish people sounds like somebody that's off his meds to me. OK, but people say that about Kanye all the time, that he's mentally ill. And my issue with that is that, I mean, just that that well may be the case. I mean, I think he said himself that he's bipolar, but there are plenty of people who have mental illness that I mean, you can't just dismiss everything he says because he's mentally ill. Look, I'm sorry. I have a hard time taking black people seriously as anti-Semites.

I just, you know, for some reason, there's struggle like a white anti-Semite scares me and a black one. I'm like, he doesn't mean it. Well, I have I have noticed with my generation, it does become a cop out where we could just say i'm mentally ill for just being shitty to people and just acknowledging if a problem or acknowledging you struggle with depression is not a scapegoat it's not an excuse it's like okay yeah but you still did the shitty thing what why why do you i want i want to say something in a moment of seriousness to dan that um you should go look at the Anti-Defamation League heat map that shows which neighborhoods are where Jews are beaten up. And you would start taking that more seriously. New York has the highest number of, and the other blue cities, urban areas, have the overwhelming

majority of all the violent crimes committed, hate crimes committed against Jews, and more hate crimes committed against Jews than any other group in America. So I know what you're saying, but don't dismiss it. It filters down and it's dangerous. Having said that, I do forgive mentally. If somebody's mentally ill, they're mentally ill. And, you know, I don't begrudge somebody every, you know, little joke about, you know, like they're teaching my kid Kwanzaa. I don't believe in Kwanzaa.

I wish they'd give him Hanukkah. At least he might make some money. Like, you know, I would need to know more about the person before I would decide that that is some sort of hateful joke because it can be just a joke, you know that i would need to know more about the person before i would decide that that is some sort of hateful joke because it could be just a joke you know he also said that um black people can't be anti-semites because they're jews so uh you know i don't know he said he said a lot of things i think that um you know he put candace Owens and himself in White Lives Matter shirts. He went on Tucker Carlson.

I mean, I think Moses is right. He's doing the exact thing that is going to garner the strongest reaction. Yeah. So Trump won. It's like everyone was talking about him. Now, the problem is, yes, it has real world consequences. Now someone sees him talking about Jews and they feel more emboldened if they were the type of person to to beat a Jewish person up on the street. Yeah, I mean, I think listen, I don't know if you saw it.

The the head of the city council, Los Angeles, had to resign because she referred to the adopted son of one of the white city council members. I think I'm getting the story correct as. This little monkey he carries around as an accessory. This is what the person of color Hispanic city council member said about the black adopted son of a white city council member. And she said it to other Hispanic council members and around there. So it seems to me with the expectation that this would be okay in that group, right? And it was just ironic. This was the same week that my son learned in school that only white people can be racist. So this is what they're teaching my son, only white people can be racist. And, you know, I just think that anybody who hates somebody because of the color of their skin or or you know, I know Jews are not

a race, but the Nazis consider them a race. Any of that is racism and I just think it's intellectually unserious to think that the feeling is less wrong

or less ugly because of the skin color of the person. I don't think it's less wrong or less ugly because of the skin color of the person i don't think it's less wrong less ugly i'm saying what scares me more on a visceral level uh and what scares me more on a visceral level is a white person saying the same thing that kanye said why does that scare you more i i think because i think two reasons number, white people have proven quite adept at putting their hatred into practice. Are you talking about the Nazis?

I'm talking about them in particular. There you go again. Real world example. What's with you people? Get over the Nazis already. And I don't know. I just... Because black people are, are,

are fellow minorities and fellow persecuted people. For some reason, I, I, I don't think there, I, you know, I,

I just, I don't, it doesn't hit me the same way. Even if that's illogical, by the way, it doesn't hit me the same way. Yeah. No,

I, I, I, I, listen, I mean, I, I,

I, I understand what you're saying. Maybe, maybe that's right. You imagine a more powerful group, whatever it is. I mean, I, I'm not one who tends to think that the Holocaust is happening in America because it happened in Nazi Germany, but I know people think that's very wrong of me to say that. But I think that, you know of me to say that but um i think that you know intellectually we should

demand this the same thing from everybody like you know that it the certain things are wrong and and certain kinds of reasoning is immoral and certain kinds of beliefs are demonstrably illogical and hateful and unfair and can't be defended. And it shouldn't matter what color, because in some way, what you're saying, Dan, I think emboldens this Hispanic city councilwoman to call this little boy a monkey because I'm sure I'm sure in in in Arkansas it would be possible that a city council member would say that I'm telling you in Los Angeles there's no fucking way white people in the city council are calling a black child a monkey this is Los Angeles so what you're seeing is that, and these are the most woke people on earth, including the Hispanic people. This is the most liberal precinct on planet earth, maybe. And yet,

because of what you kind of saying, this Hispanic woman thinks, well, the rules don't apply to me, right? And we walk around thinking, oh, white people are the most racist people in the world because we've defined racism as a white thing. I didn't say that the most racist. I said what scares me on a visceral level. No, I'm saying I'm zooming out from you. I'm saying like we're told like my kid is being taught only white people can be racist, which is, you know, I get it. The racism is hate plus power or whatever that thing is. But there is there is a danger to that, which is essentially taking the heat off people to say, well, I can do this.

I'm a person of color. Wouldn't it be better if we said, well, no, nobody can talk that way. You know, nobody can talk. It doesn't matter what color you are. It's racism is racism. Anyway, so Kanye West, if he's mentally ill, I would give him a pass.

What are you going to do? Well, I think the real takeaway is that... Can I tell you something, Perra? My friend, Wig, who died, right? He had manic depression. Yeah, I know. And he died not long ago. He committed suicide.

And he and I were very, very close friends. When he had his manic episode he held a bottle of ketchup over my head and i thought he was going to kill me like he was like this oh i thought he was pouring the ketchup on you like no no i thought he was going to eat maybe maybe ready to smash me over the head with it. He was a six foot one black guy, you know, mental illnesses, mental illness. I'm not saying we shouldn't. No, I hear what you're saying. I hear what you're saying. I mean, I think, you know, the thing about Kanye and I personally do think that he is absolutely brilliant. But I think that, you know, what's difficult to watch is that he, you know, it's very self-destructive, it's destructive behavior. But, you know, on the other side, and I think I hold sort of an unpopular opinion here, I think that, you know,

he doesn't play by the rules that society or polite society in the entertainment industry has put forth is like this is how you're supposed to act. And, you know, he goes on something like Tucker Carlson because somebody else won't have him. You know, he's not going to be welcome on the the the shows that are not, you know, I mean, I can't stand Tucker Carlson. I think he's I think I think the view would have kind of I don't think they would. Yeah, Tucker Carlson for sure. Because he because he cut around the crazy. Yeah. To try to try to hide it. He's disgusting. We know that. And then Candace Owens, who A,

must also know that he's kind of crazy. B, is using him as a beard kind of to try to make her seem less more credible. I have to confess to being attracted to Candace Owens. And C, now she's going to have to explain away why all of a sudden it's okay for her to be

associating with somebody who's making these anti-Semitic remarks. So she's in a bind. She went to my high school, by the way, Candace Owens, albeit about 20 years later. Mark Zuckerberg went to my high school. Oh, did he? Donald Trump went to my high school. Moses?

I've never been to my high school. Family's been to my high school. Oh, did Donald Trump went to my high school? Moses, I've never been to my high school. Question, Moses, when you see Donald Trump, does it remind you of a cult? Yes, it does. These people when you when they were do those videos of outside? Yes. But the guilty feeling is is the first visceral feeling is a feeling of jealousy. Like, oh, you got what we never could. You got success. And then it's, of course, all the hate. And this is embarrassing and this is stupid. But yeah, definitely, definitely QAnon.

Absolutely. Extreme beliefs that are acted on. Absolutely. I mean, a lot of organized religion has a lot of. Yeah, well, obviously it's a fine line between cult and religion, you know. Well, you get successful enough and you're no longer a cult. You are a mainstream religion.

And I think Scientology is getting to that point. I mean, for the past 10 years, everyone's like Scientology is crazy, crazy, crazy. And then slowly there's going to be a new crazy thing. There's QAnon, which is for people

who can't afford Scientology. And Scientology is just going to become another Christianity or Mormon. There'll still be jokes about it, but it won't be, oh, this guy's a Scientologist, immediate laugh. Yeah, well, you wonder if all religions at some point didn't have to start with a lie. I mean, I don't know. I guess it can just bubble up the legends or something, but I mean, the Mormon religion

certainly started with somebody bullshitting, right? Absolutely. Joseph Smith. And it's harder than ever to start one now because everything is recorded and a record you could just back then you go out to the woods. I saw these plates and God said this and you didn't need like, OK, we'll open up your phone to see where if you were geotagged, if you were even in the woods, I saw these plates and God said this and you didn't need like, OK, well, open up your phone to see if you were geotagged, if you were even in the woods. Is there any was there a cell phone tower that cross you could have been hurting hearing this? Are you mentally ill? Yeah, they just have the language for it. And they had the

benefit of no record. Well, also in the old and what's what's really, you know, exactly difficult to to grapple with is that the Mormons are successful. They're decent. They're nice. They're beautiful. It's hard to argue. It's not an oppressive cult. Maybe the polygamy aspect of it. But you look at the Romneys, whatever it is. I've met a lot of Mormons. I had a Mormon in my family one time.

It seems to have some pretty okay results. Well, I'm going to tell you that my best friend... You know who's a Mormon, I think, is the founder of JetBlue and Breeze. Look at Ryan Hamilton. You don't get nicer than Ryan Hamilton. First of all... Breeze now flying daily

out of Westchester County to L.A. My best friend. You talk about convenience if you live in Westchester. Earl, if you're going to talk bad about Mormonism, I'm going to have to wish you a good day, sir. Listen to me. My best girlfriend is a former Mormon missionary. And what

was her position? Well, that depends on where she was positioned in front of the bishop at said time. And there I cannot tell you the number of sinister stories. And if you ever do get around to reading my first book, you can read all about it because it's some crazy fucked up shit that's going on in Mormonism. Anyway, why don't we why don't we save this for another another episode?

We have it's a big topic. I think it'd be a nice place to to put a bow on this. And then a two state solution. Do you think Palestine is a light note to leave? Oh, well, we certainly talk about that. But Moses, you're on tonight. Palestine. Yeah. Yeah. Israel, Palestine.

I'm going to close out. Yeah. Yeah. Three shows tonight. Tonight you have three. Yeah. Yeah. Israel Palisades. I'm going to close out. Yeah. Yeah. Three shows tonight. Tonight you have three. Yeah. Here. Yeah. On a weekday. It's the best. Yeah. I only get one on one on a weekday. Maybe when they open up the new room at the McDonald's. Well, I've been away for like a month. So sometimes, yeah, sometimes you will do that.

And you're leaving tomorrow, you said. Yeah, I'm leaving. I don't know if I could say shooting a sequel to a very popular comedy movie that didn't do well by the time it came out and then retroactively became popular. I'm getting out of plane tomorrow. How big is the part? It's the lead. One of the leads. Wait a minute. You don't even need my fucking book deal. The whole time I thought, no, the movie industry is in the toilet. I was just needed money.

I'm getting paid in like a Foot Locker gift card is not what it used to be. Well, I'm sure you're going to be decently, but wow. The poster for this movie is in the main room on the back wall. The main of the comedy cellar, the original McDougal Street Room, the poster, the number one of this movie. Oh, is it half baked? Yeah, I can't confirm nor deny. Oh, is it half-baked? Confirm nor deny.

Okay. Legally. Legally. Well, I told you Moses was going places. I wasn't lying. But... But, I mean, yeah, this is the best place in the world. I'm still nervous to perform here because everyone does... It must be very satisfying that you made it out.

Like, that you came from such a low point. Like it must be extra gratifying. I would think I wouldn't know from personal experience, but to have been where you were and now to be a starring in a film. And you're you know, that that has to be what it might have been a little bit extra. You know, I always wanted to come from nothing and succeed. Yeah. I've accomplished neither

yeah we gotta go podcast at comedyseller.com questions comments and suggestions we thank Moses Storm we wish him luck uh

you know uh in his movie um a special out on HBO called Trash White good lord this kid's got everything

yeah it's the first thing I directed wrote and I built the entire set for it and it's on HBO Max right now it's the first thing I directed, wrote, and I built the entire set for it. And it's on HBO Max right now. It's called Trash White.

Trash White instead of White Trash, Trash White. Okay, Moses Storm, thank you for coming. We'll see you next time. Bye-bye. Bye. Thank you.