The Comedy Cellar: Live from the Table - Who Wants to be a Billionaire

Episode Date: October 18, 2019

You're listening to The Comedy Cellar, live from the table, on the podcast of the comedy cellar on Raw Dog Series 99XM. This is Dan Natterman. I will be the main host today because Noam is not here. I don't know why he's not here. Usually when he's not here, he gives us a reason, but he has not done so this time. I think he's going to Vegas this week. My understanding is that nothing catastrophic

has happened. Hopefully nothing catastrophic has happened. I believe he is going to Vegas to check up on the Comedy Cellar Vegas. As you know, our regular listeners know, the Comedy Cellar has a club in Vegas. We're waiting for Jared Freed to come. We've also got with us tonight the great James Altucher.

He's here. James is a... So fantastic to be here. Good to see you all. Dan, always a pleasure. When you're the host, I love talking to you. Likewise, I'm sure. And, of course, Perry Alashian-Brand, our producer, is with us as well. James Altucher.

Who is James Altucher? If you're a regular listener, you know. If you're a Bitcoin aficionado, you know. Unfortunately. James Altucher is... He is an author. He is a comedian.

He is a comedy club owner. He's part owner of Stand Up New York. He is a... Crypto... Crypto... Crypto currency guru. I don't like that word.

Well, what would you prefer? Just an interest. He has an interest in cryptocurrency. Bitcoin is holding steady at about $7,000 a Bitcoin right now, I think. Last I checked. Yeah, so it's been floating around between like $7,000 and $8,500. I mostly had a Bitcoin. I had a Bitcoin.

I sold most of it. I have about a tenth of a Bitcoin left. And I kind of don't pay attention to it. Sounds like a pet. Yeah, it's cute. You know what? I feel like that's a business idea. Like sort of like a Japanese doll type of thing.

Like if you water your Bitcoin every day, it might grow. They have like for kids. They have, like, for kids. They have, like, I mean, no, it's like some, like, digital pet that you have to, like, you know, digitally feed. Yeah. James has a new book out. Hate to put an end to the Bitcoin pet conversation. No, no, no. I do want to get to James' new book.

Think Like a Billionaire is Forthcoming. This book has been written, or is it in the... Yeah, it's written, and I'm actually publishing it through Scribd. You know Scribd? It's kind of like a Netflix of books. Oh, okay. So you subscribe to Scribd, you have access to millions of books, including most books by mainstream publishers, and I'm exclusively publishing it on Scribd, so that

people can read it there. Is that like a self-publishing thing? No, I mean, Scribd is... They have to approve you? Yeah. How high is the bar? I don't know. But I have about, of all my books, about half are self-published, and half are published by mainstream publishers,

and I encourage everybody to try self-publishing. Everyone who thinks they can't get a book out there, self-publish. Well, I'm writing a novel, as you know, and I'll be facing that very question when it's finished, which I'm hoping for a mid-2020 finishing. But I would prefer to get a publisher behind it

for just the prestige reasons. Yeah, I think for... I need that the prestige reasons. Yeah, I think for... I need that self-esteem. Yeah, I think for the first book, it's not so bad to get a mainstream publisher just to get, like you say, that kind of, not quite prestige factor, but it gets rid of the stigma. But there's many reasons to publish a book. You could publish a book maybe because you want speaking gigs.

Then you should just... No one's going to ever ask you later, hey, who was your publisher? You're just going to say you have a book hey, who was your publisher? Just, they're just going to, you're just going to say you have a book out and then they buy it or not. And you, the publisher doesn't really do

that much marketing for you. You market through your social media and word of mouth and go on podcasts. What the publisher does. When you have a book out, I promise you can come on my podcast and we'll talk about it.

Okay. But what the publisher does for you is, as I said, gives you prestige and my mommy can brag to her friends that Daniel has a book out with Simon & Schuster or with Little Brown. Will she actually say... Or she could do that anyway.

Will she actually say, he's with Little Brown? And they're going to be like, who the hell is Little Brown? No, I feel like I've written two books, and I feel like when people do ask me who published them, and they don't take me that seriously, like at first, and then when I'm like, oh, Penguin and HarperCollins, and then they're like, oh, maybe you're not just like a wise-ass idiot. Or I could just publish it by Al Tucher imprint.

You could, actually. And no one will know that that's just James Al Tucher. You know, the interesting thing is, again, I published about half with the Harper Collins and Penguins of the World and half self-published. Financially, I've done better with the self-published. Totally. But you're right. People want to know at

least once somebody else chose you, which at heart, I hate that feeling because it's a lottery, really. Who's to say some agent or some publisher's assistant has the right to judge the quality of your art? We were just talking about this.

And, you know, so ultimately, look, so many famous books have been self-published. J.K. Rowling and Fifty Shades of Grey. Fifty Shades of Grey was self-published. Initially, and then it got... Yeah, it sold 250,000 copies, and then Simon & Schuster picked it up.

There's a lot of great science fiction books that were initially self-published. That's something that's happening too. They do self-publish and then the big houses are like, oh shit, we should get on this. So James, I want to talk... Because I've been on Twitter.

Generally speaking, I don't get involved with politicians, but Bernie Sanders, I don't get involved with politicians, but Bernie Sanders, I think, is an idiot. Or if he's not an idiot, he's pandering to idiots with this war against rich people, in particular billionaires. And I think that Bernie's attitude toward billionaires is as ignorant as Trump's attitude toward immigrants. I think he's scapegoating.

When he says things like, there shouldn't be, he tweeted recently, there shouldn't be any billionaires. Well, how do you propose to get rid of the billionaires? Or to prevent the creation of new billionaires? Right, and you know, it's funny how a lot of people have jumped on this bandwagon. Robert Reich,

the former Secretary of Labor under Clinton, he made a video, we should abolish billionaires. AOC, of course, is on Bernie Sanders' exact platform in terms of billionaires. What does it even mean? All these people have created so much economic value in society and created so many millions and millions of jobs. Who cares if one person has amassed some wealth? That's new money generated in the economy that they amassed. Like why punish one person when they've created hundreds of millions of, or tens of millions of job opportunities, profits?

When you, when I buy something from Amazon, when I buy anything almost, I'm almost always using Amazon. So thankfully somebody had incentive to create that company and why are we so against somebody else benefiting? I always go by the philosophy, I look at what's in my pocket, I don't care what's in Dan Natterman's pocket. I don't care what's in anybody's pocket except Noah.

For some reason I'm interested in what is in his pocket. Well because that's in your self interest as well You perform here And he owns this club So if this club fell apart I just like to bust his balls Because he's always I believe

Minimizing his wealth And so I like to bust his balls about it Not that it's any of my business You understand But he walks around like he's on welfare No he doesn't I'm exaggerating And also you have a thing about how I just think he's funny like he's on welfare. No, he doesn't. I'm exaggerating.

And also you have a thing about how every time something... I just think he's funny when he's like, well, I don't know, you know, tough month this month or whatever. I mean, whatever. Sometimes he'll say things. Not that, but sometimes he'll say things that I'm like, what the fuck are you talking about? You're drowning in it. Look, look. So many people have problems. Now, yes.

Well, he might well have problems, but money ain't one. Right. So money, to a large extent, not 100%, but money will solve your money problems, which is a big problem for many people in society. But again, nobody sits around watching TV and accumulating a billion dollars. You have to work hard for it. And no one is a self-made billionaire. So take someone like

Ken Langone, the founder of Home Depot. A, the guy's donated so that every medical student in New York City goes to medical school for free.

He's donated money to every hospital in New York City. That's why they're all called the NYU Langone hospitals. That's why I recently got my penile rash

checked. Over 100,000 people have become millionaires because of this guy. Just psoriasis, nothing serious. Is that true? It may or may not be true. You never know because he makes up his jokes. You know, but everything is cancer when you Google it. That's all I can, any symptom is cancer when you Google it.

Yeah, that's why I have not, I actually, you know, I haven't been to. Potentially cancer. I haven't been for a checkup since I was 15 years old. And I recently, somebody told me something interesting, which is that I'm probably a hypochondriac. Not that I'm healthy, that I'm actually afraid to go to the doctor because I'm afraid that everything is wrong with me. So I'm terrified to actually go to the doctor. And that actually resonated for me. Like, I think I probably am such a hypochondriac, I won't get a checkup.

And you'll probably be all right. I mean, if your parents lived till a ripe old age, or did they not? Yeah, no, they did pretty good. Then you'll probably be okay, but it's probably better to go to the doctor. Is that the case with the dentist as well? No, I go to the dentist. Why are you saying my breath is bad? I want to ask you, James, you've said a lot that you've made a lot of money,

you've lost a lot of money. Thanks for reminding me. You've gained it back, you've lost it back. I don't know where you are exactly in your, if you're between fortunes now, or if you're within a fortune. I think you're within one, because I see your beautiful wife next to you.

Which is, of course, the only way to, that's sexist, you know, saying the only way to attract a woman is to have money. Yeah, but I was just kidding. In part. But women, as Sally Albright said, How I Met Sally, women are very practical. It's true. More practical than me. And it has some importance. If it's not the only thing, it's a factor.

I think there's three skills. There's making money, there's keeping money, there's growing money. So, yes, I've gone from, like, I'll give you an example. My first company, all the way in the 90s, I made websites for gangster rap record labels. That was our specialty. We sold the company. I made millions of dollars. And then by, basically by 2000, I went from, it's not even bragging to say this because of part two, but I went from like over 10 million cash in the bank

account to $143 in about an eight month period. And, and then, and then, and I didn't do that just once. I've done that at least four times. And it's, it's, it's brutal. Like I had the skill of growing it and I had zero skill at keeping it. It's like a completely different skill and I didn't know that. I thought I was smart and it turned out I was probably the stupidest person I knew. You're like a, maybe you're like a ballplayer, you know? You make the money but you can't keep it. Some of the athletes do the same thing, I guess. I think because you think that, oh, I did it so

that now I'm done. I'm done with the hard part of human life. And so you kind of give up improving yourself and then it just all falls apart. And you think you're smarter than you are. So what's the trick to keeping it? The trick to keeping it is to... I think the trick, I think, to keeping it is put your money in a diversified stock portfolio. I don't know. I don't actually like stocks at all or that much. I think the trick to keeping it is to keep most of it in cash, and then there's another trick to growing it. But to keep it, the main mistake I made was I would buy big things

or make huge investments. And you're right, diversification's key, or cash. And diversification's good for growing it. Cash, I think, is good for keeping it. Because if you just keep it in cash and you don't spend a lot, you're not going to lose it. I do want to get back to the billionaire conversation, keep things on track.

So a lot of arguing on Twitter focuses on the point that you don't need, that if we're looking, everybody agrees that we want to motivate people to work and to create and to build companies and to innovate. Pretty much everybody's in agreement on that. And there are people that make the argument, okay, but billionaires are not motivated by money. Once you're a billionaire, you don't go to,

Bill Gates isn't going to work every day because he wants another billion dollars. He's going to work every day because he wants to conquer, he wants to create, whatever he wants to do, I don't know. But so that brutally taxing a billionaire would not decrease incentive greatly. Do you agree with that, James Altucher? Yes and no. So the argument is if you tax, if you do some wealth tax and say, hey, we're going to just take a big chunk of all the billionaires' money. Billionaires, one thing they're very good at is they're very smart at avoiding a tax like that. So you're going to see all of them move

to another country other than the U.S. No guarantee Bill Gates is not handing over half of his wealth to the government. 100% guarantee. But Bill Gates is a great example where he has pledged all of his wealth, $100 billion plus, to charity. So he does wake up every day figuring out how to give away $1 billion. So then you have to ask the question, who is better at giving foreign aid? Is it the U.S. government or is it Bill Gates? So Bill Gates actually is very clever about how he avoids giving money to corrupt governments

and presidents and prime ministers, you know, when he's giving direct aid to foreign countries to, for instance, cure malaria. The U.S. government, not as clever. The U.S. government just, as we see in these current impeachment proceedings, the U.S. government, not as clever. The U.S. government, as we see in these current impeachment proceedings, the U.S. government just sort of hands over aid and lets the other country do what they want with it. In many cases, those countries are corrupt. We've seen almost every single country we give aid to, the leaders become billionaires themselves while they're in office. Bill Gates tries very hard and has a lot of things in place to avoid corruption.

Okay, but what about the motivation? If we tax billionaires at, I don't know what Bernie wants to do, 90, but whatever Bernie wants to do, how much, if any, is this going to decrease their incentive to continue to innovate

and continue to build their companies. It will, of course, decrease. It will, of course, decrease. So if someone like Bill Gates, instead of holding on for billions of dollars and building a company that spans the globe, whether you're like Microsoft or not, he would have sold it early on and made enough money to avoid the radar and retired. But if these billionaires could have retired a long time ago and with enough money, take somebody like Elon Musk.

I don't know what he's worth. Yeah, about $20 billion. Did he create Tesla to make more money or because he wants to change the world and go down in history as the man that changed the world with the electric car? Yeah, don't forget. How much of his motivation is money? My guess would be not that much. Yeah, don't forget, he made about $200 million on PayPal,

and then he put so much money into SolarCity, which is, you know, such an innovative company on solar power, now owned by Tesla. He put so much money into Tesla. He put so much money into SpaceX when we had no space program, and he kind of went broke. If he messed up that last rocket launch, it would have been the third or fourth rocket launch in a row that failed,

he probably would have gone dead broke. He was sleeping on Sergey Brin's couch. And finally he got this rocket launch and he was able to start taking companies public and so on. And he built his wealth again. But he was willing to risk it all. Did he have incentive in his money? No. Like you say, he had many different incentives. He's a very creative guy. Money was maybe a

measuring stick. And again, though, you have to look at not just do we lose incentive for these people? Because you're right, that might not be an incentive. But in terms of the charitable efforts that they're all engaged in now, so many of these billionaires have signed these pledges where they're going to give all or half of their billions to charity. Are they better at giving charity or is the government? Who is a better allocator of money? And if you've ever ridden on Amtrak, for instance, probably know the government's not so good at allocating money. Well, you know, that's an interesting question that I don't really know much about. But there's another aspect of it, which is just this hatred of rich people that's just misplaced. You know, whether or not their money is their incentive or not doesn't mean you have the right to take everything from them.

Yeah. So when Bernie talks about there shouldn't be any billionaires, first of all, I don't know how you would do that. I mean, once you're worth a billion, now you're taxed at 100%. I don't know how you would create a system where there were no billionaires. But I think he's creating a toxic environment of scapegoating rich people as though they're the problem. Right, because... So let's say the problem is income inequality, which I agree is a problem.

That's not caused by more billionaires. That's a symptom of income inequality. Look, there's many factors that cause it. You could spend all day arguing it, but it's definitely not the fact that there are these amazing companies like Amazon, Apple, Tesla, Google. That has not caused income inequality. Other policies have. And then

you have to ask the question again, I'm always getting back to it. These are people who, these are companies that create jobs, create opportunities. You know, you buy something on Amazon, then you take an Uber down to come to this podcast. There's all sorts of innovation, you know, then you might take a self-driving car in a few years, or you might use genomics to cure previously incurable cancers. I don't see the government working on these projects. I see entrepreneurs, people who have incentives working on them. And again, if you take all the billionaires together and then you take the government, over the past 50 years, who has killed more people? Probably the government.

I don't know of that many people that billionaires have killed. But the government regularly kills people all around the world. Well, I mean, you know, I... It's a related question because the money has to go somewhere. If you're moving it from one hand to another, you're basically giving it to the people who arm 18-year-olds with machine guns and send them over to Iraq to kill little babies. Another question is what negative effects income inequality has.

If the people on the bottom, and I'm not saying they do, but if the people on the bottom have enough, if we all have enough that we can live our lives comfortably, does it matter that somebody has $80 trillion? I mean, is the inequality really the issue? To what extent is inequality... Inequality creates jealousy and anger, which is real and which is perhaps bad.

Right, and income inequality has been an issue when more and more people... But if the people on the bottom have enough, how important is it to worry about the people on the top? Right, there's fewer people than ever who are beneath the poverty line, and this is not something that is a political thing. It's just year over year, over the past 60 years, there's less people than ever under the

poverty line. And so you have to ask, in previous situations where there's been mass income inequality, is it because more people got pushed below the poverty line and then they were to get, you know, starvation or diseases? But now we have no major diseases that are sweeping the impoverished. Nobody is really starving in the U.S. More people than ever are above the poverty line. So you have to ask, why are we focused on 12 people

when there's bigger societal issues? We have with us Jared Freed just stopped by. Hello, Jared Freed. Jared Freed. I don't know, Jared Freed. Jared Freed. What's happening? Well, I don't know if I'm going to read this introduction.

You don't have to. He's a comedy seller, comedian, host of the J Train podcast, co-host of Betches You Up. That's right. All right. What's Betches You Up?

It's a podcast. The You Up podcast. And his debut album, Always a Mama Bear, was just released and apparently he's doing quite well on iTunes. And his debut album, Always a Mama Bear, was just released and apparently he's doing quite well on iTunes and yeah, so welcome, Jared. Thanks for having me. Sorry I'm late.

The rain killed my commute. Just to tell you what we're discussing and then we have a lot to get to today. Noam's not here, by the way. I think he's in Vegas. I'm not sure. We were talking about Bernie Sanders' crusade against billionaires. James just wrote a book about think like a billionaire is forthcoming. I guess that means

to think as though you're going to be a billionaire one day? Yeah. So I've interviewed probably 20 or so billionaires, and I kind of just assembled sort of little things I personally learned from talking to all of these different people. Well, what do you think? So, Jared, what do you think about Bernie and many on the left's crusade against the super rich? I don't know.

I feel like a billionaire whenever I go to the West Coast. You ever go to the West Coast and you wake up at like 5 a.m. because your clock is off. It's like a superpower. And you're like, yeah, you're like, I'm a billionaire. This is what it is. You know how those billionaires wake up at like 5 a.m. and they say they take four hours of sleep? That's my favorite part about being on the West Coast.

Is you feel more... I feel like a billionaire because I can get through the night. I can stay up. Waking up, that's the issue. And I feel like billionaires are good at that. But if I was going to get into Bernie's crusade, I don't know. It's tough to tell people to stop making money.

I don't know. And also, it's not... But Gary Jarrett, I'm surprised you're not more passionate about that because you are an entrepreneur. This is true. Not just... Aren't we all? Aren't all comics? Wouldn't you think of comics like I think a lot of comics are

pro-entrepreneur because that's the whole thing is you're starting your own business. It's like golfers. Most golfers are Republicans because they are their own business. We'll think about you just released this comedy album on iTunes, right? You weren't selected by a record label. You uploaded it to this platform.

You were able to entrepreneurially put out an album the same way, I don't know, the same way Jay-Z might put out an album. And iTunes is a platform that everyone uses, created by Steve Jobs, a billionaire. If he didn't create this, maybe you would be dependent on some record label or some other comedy label selecting you instead of you choosing yourself

and becoming more entrepreneurial. Yeah, I'm not against billionaires. To me, the people who complain about billionaires are just wasting their time on their way to not becoming thousandaires. To me, the people who complain about billionaires are just wasting their time on their way to not becoming thousandaires. Jared, you're quite right when you say that comics are by nature entrepreneurs, but you are more so

than most because you have two podcasts, you have your... You're always up to something. I'm always up to something. I'm always up to something. I'm always sneaking around. You're on Instagram constantly dispensing relationship advice. That's true.

Whereas I am less motivated in that direction. I just want... I want the world to come to me. I'm not choosing myself as James Altucher would say. I'm waiting for the world to choose me it hasn't worked so far

what would be a tiny way though you could move forward I'm writing that book that I'm writing it's entrepreneurial in nature and if I can't get a publisher I'll choose myself James wrote a book by the way Perrielle called Choose Yourself so that's why I bring up that expression

what's like Natty Light what's your goal? Like, what is your goal? Well, that's an interesting question. My goal used to be, back in the 90s when you were not even doing comedy, do a little comedy, get 10 to 15 minutes of good material, go on Letterman, get a sitcom, and be Seinfeld.

Okay. As crazy as that sounds. That doesn't sound crazy. Each step of the way, though, someone who you don't know has to choose you. Some assistant producer for Letterman has to say, oh, I like this guy. I'm going to choose him. Then someone has to watch you in Letterman

at another network and say, oh, let's make a sitcom out of this. And then a producer has to like you. Then an executive has to like you. Then a bunch of marketing people have to like you. Instead of now, you can... We're seeing so many comedians just blow up on YouTube and creating their own, you know, vision for themselves. Exactly. Now, back in the old days, though, all that seemed reasonable to me because the people I saw on television, it was happening for all of them. I didn't see all the

people that it wasn't happening for. I just saw, I saw Seinfeld. I saw, I saw Roseanne. I saw Tim Allen. I saw, uh, who was the comic? They all seemed after,

after 15 minutes of material that didn't blow me away, quite frankly, in many cases, not in all cases, we're, we're becoming hugely successful. My question to you is now, who was the comic that didn't have that that became

huge? Sebastian Maniscalco. Well, before that. So during that era. During that era they didn't. Because now I think like Alan Heavey? He was on a lot of places. He was on Comedy Central. Yeah, but he wasn't like a Seinfeld or Ray Romano. There were no

grassroots people at that time. This is what I mean. I think like the beauty of now is that there's an example of both now. There are people that are plucked somewhat, and they do their five, and then they get the deal, and then they go to the next. There's people doing the old school way, but then there's also this other group of people that are finding their own way that you can kind of like kind of look at their road a little bit to be like, okay, I see what they're doing because if it's not happening from the pluck part

I gotta go in the weeds and I gotta start doing ground work and I may not get there with you, Jared but we as a people will get to that promised land. How many working comedians would you say are in the U.S.? It's somewhere around 4,000 or 5,000.

And Netflix this year will do 30 comedy specials. So most people probably are not getting plucked. Most people have to find different and innovative ways to get out there. And it's happening. Yes, unfortunately this is all corresponding with me getting old and tired. Most people have to find different and innovative ways to get out there. And it's happening. Yes. Unfortunately, this is all corresponding with me getting old and tired. So I somehow have to, you know what I'm saying?

Jared still, he's a young 30-something. He drinks me under the table. What do you think Dan should do? That's not related. What do I think Dan should do? I think the... Well, Perry L says I should do more videos on the Instagram I totally agree

I tell him that all the time he's likeable right in front of your fucking face but to me that's half we'll start with half what we're noticing is that people want to like the people they want to be a part of the person and what they're going through.

So like, you know, for me, like I do the podcast. If you listen to the podcast, you know, you feel like you know me and you're more adept to come to a show. And then the other thing is after I started doing the podcast, I started watching The Bachelor and The Bachelorette and I like doing that. So I would do my Instagram stories of me yelling at the TV. I liked yelling at the TV and making fun of the Batch from Bachelorette. When I started doing that, it felt, I think,

I got a different kind of reaction where people were like, oh, everything's funny. This guy's funny doing this thing. I want to see him doing the other thing too now. So, like, for me, like, it's kind of like, you know, I think like these...

But you're just putting yourself out there more. But these podcasts and stuff are like almost like being, you know, and these YouTube and everything that's internet-based is like being a character on a show was in the 90s. So you could be the sidekick, and you'd be like, well, I'm familiar with them. I'll go see the show now.

And hopefully the show's good. But I think it also takes up a lot of time. As you said said the exhaustion part I see that I agree with that but you know I think this probably goes for every comic we have to do things that

we find artistically fulfilling yeah of course and I don't know that YouTube videos for me would be artistically fulfilling I am feeling artistically fulfilled even though it's exhausting even though it's torture, writing my book.

And I hope when that's done... But you respond to people on Facebook, I see. Yeah, but I'm a rabble rouser. Mostly. Sorry to interrupt, but I wouldn't... How does that... To me, you rabble rouse on Facebook.

That's correct. Okay, so what's the creation of that? To me, stand-up is its own thing. It was told to me stand-up is the prize. You get to do it if other things push you up. There's very few people that are linear stand-up people. There's very few people that went from open mic to shows, to club comic, to weekends,

to theaters. You just don't see many. They had something else that got the audience to look at them. So I'm saying like the Facebook rap arouser, that's not a business, but how does that creatively turn into something that you can package for someone? Well, I never thought of it that way. I just enjoy discussions on Facebook. But what is that? What does that become? That's the way I would think about it.

Like, what's this? I like discussions on Facebook. Okay, how do I package this in a way that will get people to be fans of my rabble rousing? I mean, first of all, I think sometimes you have to do stuff that you don't love in order to get where you want to get. Like going with Jared's example, let's say you did.

I do see those comments you make. Someone will make a point. You'll be naturally skeptical and have your own unique viewpoint. What if you started doing two, three minute videos on Instagram saying someone, this guy said this, I said this, here's why. skeptical and have your own unique viewpoint. What if you started doing two, three minute videos on Instagram saying, this guy said this, I said

this, here's why, what do you think? And then you start building, you try building an Instagram presence. That's an interesting idea, and by the way, Natterman's nook. Speaking of... I'm telling you, this is all... The thing is, people get mad at me, I put tweets on Instagram, and my response is always, that's a better

packaging. That's a better way to package the rough drafts I write on Twitter that can go on Instagram. So why would I work against myself? So the packaging of Natterman's Nook, where you put a nice thing up across the top, where you have the Facebook comment. Here's the going belief right now is that the NBA players are wrong for not going against China. This is a subject that I feel like you would have an opinion on. So then you go... I actually don't even know

what you're talking about. So the NBA players are basically ignoring their relationship with China being problematic because of how China treats their citizens. NBA players have been out in front of all other social causes

and seem to have no problem when it doesn't affect their wallet to when it does affect their wallet. So a subject like that feels very media natterman. A place for you to sink your teeth into. Okay, okay. Well, I don't disagree, but I do want to use that as a jumping point.

Sure. Because you talked about my latest Facebook conversation, and I do want to use that as a jumping point. Sure. Because you talked about, to talk about my latest Facebook conversation, and I always end up deleting it because it always gets hostile. Well, that's what, but the thing is, when it gets hostile, you're creating, there's interest, there's people that are talking with you, and that's kind of the social media angle where it's like, if you had a place where you could put this, like at Facebook, if you got a following for an Adam and his nook, where you just wrote up, you say, I saw this opinion today. Here's my dissertation on the subject.

But by the way, there's something additional there, which is not only do you have potential to build an audience, but you're also focused grouping ideas. So if suddenly you have a topic that where your stance is attracting hundreds or thousands of comments, you think to yourself, oh, maybe there's a comedic point of view here that could evolve. So it's almost like focus grouping ideas to see what people are interested in. Well, let's do some, let's see if people are interested in this. As I said, I do want to get to my latest interest.

Let's go to Natterman's Nook. I don't know that I want to call it Natterman's Nook. I'm saying, let's brand this. Let's have something. What we all have to understand is... Here's the problem with me. I'm not really a rabble rouser.

I'm very measured. You're a thinker and it shows. That's your biggest problem with this stuff. You have to give in to the idea that you're a rabble rouser. You have to understand that the marketing and the packaging of this matters, and you have to lie to yourself a little bit, Matt. Welcome to my life with him.

Anyway, I'm very measured, and I don't rabble rouse, and people perceive it as controversial because people are so on a hair trigger. I suggested recently on Facebook that Columbus, because it was Columbus Day, we're taping on Wednesday, and every year it seems to get more heated the Columbus Day debate. Sure. Yeah, like everything we learned for 12 years in grade school now is

wrong. Right. We could have saved so much time not learning stuff. It may or may not be wrong, but I posed the, I posed the, I posed two points on Facebook. I want to see what you all think about it. Number one is the point that Noel makes constantly, which is how do you judge somebody from another time by today's standards? And that's a point that people talk about a lot.

Another point that I made was, is even if Columbus were the scoundrel that everybody says he is, if he is inspiring people in the present to do good things, does it matter that we're perhaps distorting somewhat the reality of what he did 500 years ago? Is it that big a deal if people are having fun and if he's a source of pride, particularly for Italian-Americans,

and if he inspires the Knights of Columbus, for example, to do charity? Is a fictionalized version of a historical hero of value, even if not corresponding

to historical reality? I pose that question to you, James Altshucher, first. Do you have anything to say about that? Yeah, I do, because I feel nothing matters from history. Now, yes, you learn from history's mistakes to some extent, but basically everybody was evil 500 years ago. Heck, 10 years ago or 50 years ago, you had Mao kill 45 million people,

or you had actually Queen Isabellaella who sent Columbus on this journey. She had the Inquisition killed God knows how many people. So I don't know. I have a feeling where I don't really care about anybody because none of that stuff matters. It's more important what matters right now today than thinking about back then. So you don't feel Columbus Day is either a good thing or a bad thing? It's a great thing because it allows kids to not go to school, which I think is a bad thing.

Well, okay. It's the biggest virtue signaling story of the year. Every year, it's a virtue signal because you haven't spent the year fighting for a Heritage Day. The day after Columbus Day, no one talks about this.

The fact that we're talking about it now is like, you know, no one's going back. You know, the day it ends is the day the story ends. So I don't believe that really people care about this. It's a very easy thing

to look smart and look good by saying this day was hard because, yeah, everyone does. Every big thing that was created or founded was done by stepping on the heads of lesser people. Facebook was created by a guy who wanted to get back at an ex-girlfriend. And we're on it every day,

and you're on there rabble-rousing, go to Natterman's Nook, and check out his opinion on the going subject. Well, again, I wouldn't call it rabble-rousing, but... Or Natterman's Nook. He's his opinion on the going subject. Well, again, I wouldn't call it rabaraging, but... Or Natterman's Nook. He's having a problem with alliteration here. Well, Natterman's Nest, that's fun.

But I'm saying this is one of those stories that, like, you know, nothing's black or white. You know, if you want to go back and you want to erase the name of the day, whatever. I just don't think you're that good of a person versus the next person who doesn't realize that Columbus did atrocities. What about Jared Freed?

How do you feel about Columbus Day? Indifferent, favorable, or unfavorable? I'm indifferent to the day. I don't think about it. Again, as an entrepreneur, I don't get Columbus Day off. It doesn't matter to me. I'm going to do shows that night.

I'm not going to honor Christopher Columbus. And I don't think Italian Americans are sitting there getting... Some are. That's a loser to me. That's a loser. Anyone that takes pride in Chris Columbus because they're Italian, it's like, okay, if the top thing at your

resume is the version of a person you are, like, oh, I'm an Italian, you're a loser. And by the way, Columbus was probably Jewish as well. Evidence is now showing. Well, he may or may not have been. I've read that. What about this notion that he did not discover America? I think that's silly.

Well, everybody knows that, well, first off, Discover America was done by Mongolians 15,000 years ago. But as far as Europeans are concerned, he did discover America. No, you have the Leif Erikson and more continental America than Columbus. Then maybe they would say the same thing about Leif Erikson. How could he discover America? My point is you can discover something even if people are already there. What if I discover a new place for brunch in Brooklyn?

Well, there's people already there. You discovered it for your people. For my people. It's a valid discovery. I discovered my girlfriend in bed with another man. He's already there. Another holiday. I still discovered it.

Sure, yeah. But this is why the subject is like such a waste this is why this subject is such a waste of time. But it's not a waste of time. Discovering something is still a valuable thing. Or, if not a valuable thing, a significant thing. Why? A world-changing thing in the case of Columbus, or in the case of whoever. Yeah, but it would have been discovered by somebody at that point anyway.

But you can say that about everything. No, but there were technological innovations in terms of shipping, in terms of the storing of food and alcohol. But it's semantics. You can say that about anything and somebody else would have done it eventually, but the fact is Columbus did have a lot of balls. He was a great seaman, as I understand it. Yeah.

Also, the bravery to just look at the sea and just go, we're going to go that way, without knowing if the sea drops off the face of the earth at that time. I commend the bravery. You don't know anything. You don't got Google Maps. At a minimum, he had balls and he had seamanship. Yeah.

And so, maybe that's worth, you know, again, and this is like about, can you separate the great deeds of a man from the evil deeds of a man, which is another question that comes up often in the artistic context. Yeah, it also comes up with almost every political leader ever, including in this past century. I don't know if Dante is part native. I don't know if he wants to talk about Columbus or not. You want to talk about Columbus? This is Dante Nero. He's been on the podcast before.

Do you know Dante? You know Dante, James, because James. Yeah? This is Dante Nero. He's been on the podcast before. Do you know Dante? You know Dante, James? Yeah, I know Dante very well. Dante roasted me on my 50th birthday. A new father. Congratulations. Welcome to the... On your new son, you're a relatively late-in-life father.

I don't think that's a secret. He's in his... I don't want to give your age away. That's a late-in-life father. I'm about to turn 50, so I don't know if that's an inspiration or not because I don't know to give your age away. That's a late in life father. I'm about to turn 50. I don't know if that's an inspiration or not because I don't know if I want kids. This is a fun subject for

Natterman's Nest. I'm telling you. Natterman's Nest, Natterman's Nook. Dan doesn't believe in the carbon footprint of a baby. I don't mind alliteration. I don't know if Nook is the one I would go with. Okay.

I prefer Nest. Nest, okay. We'll talk about that. We'll talk about that. For now, we'll go with Nest. Okay. Dante Nero, everybody. He's a regular

at James' club, I believe. Is that you, Dante? Yes, yeah. Dante's there all the time. Dante's everywhere. Yeah. I get the emails

to put in my avails. All you guys come to the club. But I like to go there when you're there. I like to go there when you're there. I watch all you guys. Let's try to work that out if we can. Because otherwise I go there.

For me, if there's nobody there that I know or can talk to, it's not as interesting to me. Comedy for me is more social than anything else. Dante, we were talking about Columbus. Now, I know you're part native. Is that correct? Apache? Oh, Sioux. As well as African American

and white. A little bit of white in there. My grandmother is half Irish. So we're talking about a topic that's much in the news this week anyway. Christopher Columbus. What are your thoughts? Columbus, hero, villain, both? Of course he's a villain.

He killed a bunch of people. He took other people's land. I mean, I don't understand why that's disputable. All right, but let me ask you a question because you just said you were a Sioux. What do you think of Abraham Lincoln? Abraham Lincoln was a dirtbag too. Because the greatest massacre, legal massacre, on

U.S. soil was against the Sioux Indians by Abraham Lincoln in 1862. And the Trail of Tears and everything else that goes on. That's been going on. You're literally talking about almost the genocide of a whole people that's been desecrated, has never been able to recover from the genocide of Europeans coming into this country.

So to Jared's point now, who cares anymore? Like it happened. It's history. Of course it's horrible, but everything is horrible. Is that what Jews say about Hitler? No, that's horrible. Everything's horrible. But if it's not horrible, if it's not who cares for Hitler, then it's not who cares for Native Americans.

Why is it any different? Look, I don't know what... I'm asking. I don't know. I don't know the answer. Well, if it's not, is it okay? Should we forget about Hitler and the Holocaust? Or should that still be remembered? I think we should not forget about anything.

And it's very simple. Don't kill people. I would say this, in 500 years, if I won't be around, absent some technology, maybe Elon Musk is working on something, but I likely won't be here in 500 years, but if in 500 years somebody says Hitler creates a mythology around Hitler that he, acknowledging that he did a lot of bad things things but saying he did some good things too and people got pride and they had parades and ate German food and nobody was really hurt by

it and... Nobody was hurt by what? By... No, he's saying hypothetically. Nobody's saying in 500 years if they start celebrating Hitler. And they create a mythology around him where they change the history and what he did. But why?

I don't think I would care in 500 years. Yeah, okay. So if you live to 500 years, that's great. But you're not going to live 500 years. I know that. But my point is, you know, there was an episode of The Simpsons where Lisa, this might sound silly, and it is. But where Lisa Simpson found out the truth about Jedediah Springfield, knew that he was a terrible man and a murderer.

Okay. And the whole town was having a parade, and they loved Jedediah Springfield, and she was about to say, I have news about Jedediah Springfield. He was, and then the woman said, tell us, what about the great Jedediah Springfield? And she just, and Lisa just said, he was great. She just said, fuck it. Everybody loves the guy, and I don't want to piss on their parade now obviously I'm not comparing Jedediah Jedediah was was not a was was was not quite as I didn't kill as many people as uh

as Columbus but the point being is is do people need their heroes and how much do we let slide certain things because we all need our heroes and our heroes might inspire good things in us. Columbus might inspire good things. The Knights of Columbus, as I mentioned earlier, does charitable work. If a long dead hero... The Knights of Columbus have nothing to do with Columbus.

The Knights of Columbus is a fraternal order that was created in the United States. And the people who define that, they define it. It has nothing to do with Columbus. Columbus didn't say, let's start the Knights of Columbus.

The point is, if people find inspiration and if people are motivated to do positive things or if they're motivated to have pride in a good way. But do you think that Columbus inspired the good things in the Knights of Columbus?

I'm not sure, to be honest with you. I don't know much about the Knights of Columbus. But in a more general sense, are heroes... Let's open the conversation more generally. Do heroes... Washington is a hero. Jefferson is a hero, they own slaves, okay? Do people need their heroes? Even if they're somewhat fictionalized and romanticized,

are heroes a necessary element to a healthy society? The problem is truth. There's three aspects that I talk about all the time. It's authenticity, credibility, and empathy. Authenticity is truth. Credibility, you say what you mean, you mean what you say. As a man, when you say you're going to do something, you do it. Are we getting good sound on Dante?

Empathy in that you look at the plight that other people go through and you and you consider that when you make decisions. And I think if you if you do those, if you practice those things, everything fall into place. The minute you deviate from those three principles, then you end up in you end up in a situation where it goes left. So there's always been revisionist history in this country because people don't want to take responsibility for the things that they've done horribly. But nobody here discovered America. And it's sort of like

to all your points, what do we do now moving forward? It kind of doesn't make any... Every single... As Dan points out, Columbus, Washington, Jefferson, Lincoln, John F. Kennedy, everybody's like a maniac. They're all killers to some extent.

Celebrate them as heroes then. Isn't it important to, I mean, there could be a pedophile down the block who did some good charity work. Do you not acknowledge that? Can we celebrate their heroic deeds

whilst at the same time acknowledging their less than heroic deeds? What was the heroic deeds? Of Columbus? Well, he was a great seaman. No, he wasn't. He was going someplace else and he ended up in America.

So he wasn't even a good seaman he ended up in America he got lost well you know it was an accident this is like the island of loss for him yeah well there there there's the semen down to wealth what else did he do well I first of all I think he was a probably a great semen and a brave see this is why I'm not a good comedian by the way I feel keep feeling an incentive to make a joke about seaman, but none of you guys do. That was my first instinct. The joke is in the word itself, seaman. You don't want to overdo it.

It's low-hanging fruit. See? This is why you guys are the best. But as a more general, but I was also talking, Dante, more generally about heroes. Yeah, but if you're doing... About Washington. Can we worship Washington? You can. But I'm saying, are you offended by that? generally about heroes. About Washington. Can we worship Washington?

You can. But I'm saying, are you offended by that? No, you can love whoever you want to love. There's Nazi and Neo-Nazis that idolize Hitler. That doesn't mean that they're right. That doesn't mean that they can't do it.

I mean, we found out recently that possibly Dr. King did some things that weren't so terrific. What did he do that wasn't terrific? Well, it's not even recently. He said he had tons of affairs. No, but there were some accusations of more than that. Okay? Which I believe of witnessing a rape and not intervening.

That's an accusation. I don't know if it's true. But even if it is true. Even if it is true. But we do know that Hitler killed a million Jews. But the point is, is he killed more than a few. And we do know that Columbus killed millions, was instrumental in the genocide of a whole race of people.

Jared, we haven't heard from Jared in a while. I know he's got something to say. My thing is, I don't heard from Jared in a while. I know he's got something to say. My thing is, I don't have a problem with you having heroes, but just have a legitimate heroes. Don't revise the history so that you can idolize somebody who doesn't

deserve the idolization. I mean, Mussolini was just as bad as Hitler. But what if somebody does something great, and forget about Columbus. Somebody does something great, but also does something horrible, like the slave owning, some of the slave owning founding fathers. Okay, and what if they do great?

They founded the country we're all living. What's so great about this country? Under the guise of free labor, and the country was built on free labor. And if it hadn't been built on free labor, the country wouldn't be what it is today.

Well, there's a lot of people that would take issue with that. I mean, Australia was not built on slavery. They did pretty well. So I think America could have done... We're not talking about Australia. Well, you've got to speak into the mic, Don. We're talking about this country was built on using black people as a revenue stream. That's not

disputable. Jared, you say what? I mean, in the same way that the Knights of Columbus, going back to the subject at hand with the Knights of Columbus, the first thing that was said was they have nothing to do with Columbus. They have something to do with Columbus. They have something to do with Columbus.

They call it the Knights of Columbus. But I'm saying the intent, like, I think with, like, Columbus Day, as far as what it means to people, you can have it, you know, to say, to go back and say, let's change the name. Fine. You know, if you want to change it to Heritage Day. But I don't think that's going to help that group more. I think you create a new day. You create a heritage day. But I don't think that's going to help that group more. I think you create a new day.

You create a new remembrance. But also, like, you can look at things in context. You can go, Columbus got in a boat, showed up here however many years ago. Whatever that means to the country being what it is today, it means. And you go, and also, it meant almost erasing a whole group of people. Okay. And we walk on that land that that was created. I'm just saying, when you get down the road of like, what are we spending our time on?

I mean, if you want to teach people that Columbus was a bad person, that's one thing. But why teach them that he was a good person when he wasn't? We agree. I mean, I don't know why that was a part of the lesson plan. I why teach them that he was a good person when he wasn't? We agree. I mean, I don't know why that was a part of the lesson plan. I don't know why that was... Everybody knows it's a revisionist of history. Right, but now it's revisionist again. And I think the point

is what are we doing with our time? Are we arguing about Columbus or are we trying to solve society's ills? And it seems like arguing about Columbus, your point is maybe we need heroes to cure society's ills. Well, I don't know. I was trying to solve society's ills? And it seems like arguing about Columbus, your point is maybe we need heroes to cure society's ills. Well, I don't know. I was trying to open up that discussion.

I was asking the question, to what extent are heroes necessary for a healthy society? In other words, if we, again, taking the founding fathers as an example, I mean, what if we decided to ditch them and blow up the Jefferson Memorial and blow up the Washington Monument? That would upset me,

but do we need those things to prosper as a society? Did they need them? No. Yeah, you don't need them. Did the founding fathers need those things to do the good things that they did do for this country? Did they need those history? Was there a Mount Rushmore that they could subscribe to? They might have had their own heroes, and I don't know about them.

You're talking about a speculation. There's this hypothetical speculation whenever it's a situation where we're talking about, let's look at the good side of what this guy is. If we don't have some pride in our founding and some pride in our founders, can we still flourish as a society? Yeah, why not? Because what's so great about the fact that the Revolutionary War, for instance,

you could point to just as many ills that came out of that. I mean, England, for instance, abolished slavery in 1833. We broke apart from England and took us another 30 years. So what's so great about our Revolutionary War? We act like it's this religious thing that happened. It was just a bunch of people, rich people fighting taxes in England and fighting to keep slavery in the South.

And ultimately, the people that came from England came here and then they instituted the same kind of aristocracy here. The founding fathers became the aristocracy. The Constitution is built so that rich people maintain their riches. Why would they not do that? I mean, I'm not saying that any group wouldn't have done that, but you have to look at what the truth of that is. The truth is that you have a situation when the founding fathers...

Go ahead, I want to... Jared, you have to go do a spot. I gotta go host. Good to see everybody. We thank you. Buy Jared's new album. Thank you. Always a mama bear. Always a mama bear. It's wherever you stream music. Jared, he looks like a frat boy, but he's really very feminine

in many ways. Lamore Azrink... I forgot her last name, but she wanted to stop by briefly and plug something. So, we're almost done. I told her she could come the last five minutes. Lamore, why is she taking? All right.

Let me ask you a question. What's so great about anything in the past? Name one good thing from the past. Well, I mean, that's an interesting, and that's a question I ask myself a lot. Like, the Canadians aren't a very patriotic people. They don't have these heroes, I don't think. They don't have founders that they worship. Their money has the queen on it, and I don't think they really care about the queen.

Yeah, they never had a revolution anymore. And their society is pretty good. So do we need, I would say that if we turned on the founding fathers as a society and they were no longer part of our pantheon, no longer on our money, if we didn't have a Washington Monument or a Jefferson Memorial, I would be sad. I don't know that that, because it's something I grew up with and, you know, something I was taught to cherish. Would it make us a worse country I don't know it's the question I asked myself you you seem to think it would not there's evidence that we're a worse country because we fought all these wars because those those heroes are what breeds the ego well but

we but I'm not prepared to dismiss them as great men in many ways, even though they had their flaws. I mean, to say that the founding of America was not a great thing, I... I'm at what cost? And I mean, if you're the people that it was done at my court... So none of those guys are heroes to me. None of them. Like, you look at the...

But, okay. And so they don't inspire me. You know who does inspire me? Nat Turner because he rebelled against slavery and he killed his slave owners. That's a guy who I could get behind. Or Obi-Wan Kenobi who

rested, who stayed calm for 40 years while Luke Skywalker was getting born and growing up. Lemore. How do you pronounce your last name again? Garfinkel? Garfinkel, yeah. As you obviously overheard, we were discussing Columbus

Day. Well, we were discussing Columbus Day earlier and then that opened up the discussion to patriotism and heroes in general. But anyway, you wanted to come here to talk about your project that's coming up. Yes, I wanted to come here to talk about your project that's coming up. Yes, I wanted to talk about this fundraiser that I'm organizing. It's going to be in two weeks, October 29th.

I believe I'm on the show. Sure. I believe so, right? I'm booked on the show. Yeah, sure. She seemed a little skeptical about that. No, I have it in my calendar. Yeah. If you say so. No. Yes. She seemed a little skeptical of that I have it in my calendar Yeah If you say so

Limor It's an Israeli name, go ahead It's October 29th at Caroline's We're doing a fundraiser for Mount Sinai's Division of ADHD and Learning Disorders The way it started was I started photographing comedians From the cellar, mostly

And we did an event. Our first event was two years ago. We auctioned off the prints. It was part of the New York Comedy Festival. Caroline sponsored it. And we auctioned off those images. Dan was one of those comedians. And this year, we're doing another fundraiser.

And there's even more comedians that I've photographed now. And there's going to be about 40 portraits of comedians and comedic actors. This year I've expanded to comedic actors. So I have people like Brooke Shields and Mindy Cohn from Infected Life. Can I ask you a question about were you inspired by the founders

to take these pictures? No, you did it because you thought it was something that would be good to help out people with, you said, ADHD. Learning disorders. No, I was inspired by my own family. Like, everybody in my family had some kind of... So your own inner compass that kind of said comedy, ADHD, linking them.

Yeah, I mean, look, I'll link comedy to anything because I love comedians. I think they're the heroes of our society because they're the ones who say everything that nobody wants to say. They say the truth. Some of us just do shtick. And I still typically lie to everybody, but that's another story. But in those lies, perhaps there's truth. I don't know, you know. Or maybe not. The truth

is most comedians are not addressing the profound questions of our day, but some are. It's hard. It's hard to do. But some are doing that. I'm not doing that. I'm talking about my cousin Sheila and how she came over for sex one day. But actually,

I think you have a great point of view there, which is that social media has blocked us from real communication, so things like your cousin Sheila and that event could happen. I think you have a point of view in that joke.

Well, I agree. I think that's actually a really funny joke. But it's not, it's a funny joke, and it does address the reality that sometimes we send text to the wrong people,

but that's not a profound question of our day. It does speak to the human condition. Yeah, it is profound. And that's what makes it funny is the fact that we're speaking to the human condition. It's very self-deprecating. Yeah, and we're speaking to the human condition,

and when we are self-deprecating, the reason why people laugh at it is because they relate to their own vulnerability, and they go, oh, this guy has the same vulnerability that I have, and that's why they laugh. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, we've gone from real face-to-face verbal communication. What about when Stephen Wright said, my school colors are clear?

What great, profound issue of the day is he addressing, or is he just being funny? I think he's just being funny, but I think you have a point of view with that Cousin Sheila joke. Or when Seinfeld says, you know, at least the bird should try to avoid hitting the other bird. I don't know if that's addressing a profound issue.

I mean, you can't assume that everybody is going to address those. No, but I hear a lot said about comedians being the great truth tellers of our day, and I think some are. A lot are. I think that's exaggerated in terms of how many of us really do that.

But anyway, Lamar. Yes. So this fundraiser for ADHD, Caroline. ADHD Yes, it's going to be at Carolines. It's going to be really fun. The first hour is going to be a cocktail hour where we auction off those prints. And then there's going to be a full on comedy show. It's going to be, I have such a great lineup, Todd Berry's headlining, and I have Judy Gold, Jim Florentine. You and Jim Florentine, I know,

have a very special relationship. We're good friends. Our kids are friends. But there's nothing sexual there. Oh my God. I'm sorry. I'm just trying to be provocative. Anyway.

No. Okay. So tell us more about the show. Gosh. I love Jim Florentine. Yes, he's fantastic. Yeah, Florentine. I do you... I love Jim Florentine. Yes, he's fantastic. Jim Florentine. I do a slight impression of Jim Florentine.

God, I lost my... He's got that jersey rash. October 29th? Yes. One hour walks in, great lineup. To buy tickets, you can go to comediansinfocus.com. Comediansinfocus.com.

Yes, to get tickets or to donate. And I really hope you guys come and bid on prints. And then come and just enjoy the funny show. Sorry I made you uncomfortable. But you know, I'm trying to be provocative. And sometimes you hit, sometimes you miss. He's a truth teller. He's asking questions.

That's his truth. Because men and women, some say can't be friends, but you've proven the opposite to be true. No, I work with comedians, so to me it's all friendships. And I agree with you. I have female friends with whom there is no,

Perry Allen and I, for example. Yes. No sexual tension there. Did he just insult you? Not at all. But what if she wanted to bang you? Would you be in for that or no? Absolutely. Moving on. She's a married woman. Yeah, and

if she wanted to bang you then what? That's not an answer. I don't bang married women with whom I work in particular. You don't think there are any affairs going on? Well, there might well be, but I'm not involved in them. I don't know. Worshipping Thomas Jefferson as a hero is one thing. My money would be on you.

Thank you, Dante. I appreciate that. Dan draws the line. It's okay to rape slaves if you're from the 1800s. It's not okay to bang a co-worker. Well, I don't think. I think it's okay to bang a co-worker. It's not my choice.

I agree with you. Raping slaves is obviously not okay under any circumstances. Thanks for that. I agree with you there. I mean, role-playing is another story. It's a controversial issue. Thank you to everybody. I think we're about done.

Well, not yet. Why is that? So first, come visit us on Instagram at livefromthetable. You can send emails to us if you'd like to address anything that's been discussed. What's our email address? Podcast at comedyseller.com for comments. Podcast at comedyseller.com for comments. Compliments and constructive criticism, but I prefer the compliments.

Dante, where can we find you? You can follow me on Instagram. It's TheDanteNero, D-A-N-T-E-N-E-R-O, and my podcast is a relationship-based podcast, Man School 202. Wow, okay. Dante is your source for all things

relationship-oriented. Of course, Jared does that, too. That's right, and listen to Jared's new special, right? Yes, Always a Mum Bear. We already talked about that. James? I'm going to dedicate my promotion to Dan Natterman's Instagram page. Dan, what's your Instagram?

It's at Dan Natterman. I seldom post, but when I do, it's always riveting and interesting. Recently, I posted a picture of my grandparents on their wedding day in 1928. You don't want to miss it at at Dan Natterman dot com. James Altucher is the author of Choose Yourself and also Think Like a Billionaire is forthcoming. He is also co-owner of the Stand Up New York Comedy Club. And here at the Comedy Cellar, we believe in promoting other clubs. We're not selfish. And so, go to the Stand Up New York Comedy Club on 78th and Broadway if you're in the area. Although, I would say Comedy Cellar is probably the best comedy club in the city.

I'm talking the truth here. The real love fest. Well, it's certainly the most popular objectively speaking in terms of number of tickets sold, obviously. That's very objective and indeed it is at this time the most popular.

Is it the best? I'll leave that to the audiences. Is it the best? I'll leave that to the audiences. It's the best. Okay. I'm going to promote Check Out the Lineups and whenever Dan Aderman is on the lineup,

come to the show. I'm promoting Dan. And I do, I do. You know, they send me these emails for Stand Up New York and it's like it's got to fill out

this whole fucking thing. It's like kind of complicated. I agree with you. Why don't you just, can you just send me like when you send me when you want me there. Why don't you run the club? I don't really enjoy it. Why don't you come and run the club?

Or if you don't want me there, that's fine, too. But if you want me there, I'm happy to work there. But say, hey, Dan, can you come whatever day at this time? All right, that's good advice. And as far as to make it easier for me, if you want me there. Now, if you don't want me there, that's fine, too. I just find that whole process

with the way you have the veils, it's like this whole thing I got to fill out. It's kind of... It's just clicking a date. No, but it's like a whole... They don't even do the date. They do the show.

It's like the easiest thing in the world. Yeah, look, the very first time I was here, Dan called me out in front of Noam for soliciting comics to go to Stand Up New York. So I'm saying

just go to the comedy cellar and watch Dan. I don't recall that, by the way. That might have happened. I think Stephen got fired because you said that. No, no. Stephen got fired. He had a beef with Noam. It had nothing to do with me. And I don't recall

doing that. Why would I do it? First of all, I don't own the Comedy Cellar. And second of all, I work at Stand Up New York. I was saying we'd love to see you more. We didn't get to the Cuba Gooding Jr. accusations today, but apparently he's in hot water. Look that up if you're interested over some Me Too shit.

What's up? Who's right over where? Cuba's right at the table. Yes. Oh my God, that's right over where? He is? Oh my god, that's hilarious. Oh, you're kidding me. Cuba Gooding Jr. is here? That's so funny. Let's ask Dante.

You're the closest to him. Why is he with Modi? Maybe they're talking about Columbus Day. Yeah, Modi and Cuba probably both have beefs against Columbus. Well, that's interesting. Have you read it? But he's in the news. I'm like, he's right there. He's like, no, he's not. Well, because what are the chances that he's right there? All right, come on. This is a comedy podcast.

Dante, ask Cuba to come sit here. We're extending this one for Cuba. I think given the circumstances, we probably should not do that. I'll ask him. Do you want me to go over and ask him to come here? Wait, tell me what's going on in the news. He's been accused of some Me Too shit, and I can guarantee you he doesn't want to talk about it here. He's been accused of grabbing women in restaurants.

Should we go sit next to him and see if he does it? Well, if he grabs you, we'll have an interesting scoop. We'll lure him over here. You know, but... Do you want me to go over and ask him to sit down with us? And talk about what? We'll let him decide. That's it.

Oh, he left. I don't think so. He heard us. In any case, thank you for listening, everybody. And we'll see you next week. Normal back from Vegas. Thank you, Dante. Thanks for having me on.

It's always such a pleasure for me to come here. Thank you. You're always welcome. At Live From The Table. Jared Freed in absentia. We to come here. Thank you. You're always welcome. At Live From The Table. Jared Freed in Abstentia. We'll thank him and we'll see you next time.