The Commercial Break - 12 Days Of TCB: Zan The Baby Man

Episode Date: December 16, 2024

Episode #657: On the fourth day of TCB my true love gave to me...Zan the PUA! You know Zan's message is really hitting home when even the people at this event don't understand what he is saying. Donate to St. Jude & The National Breast Cancer Coalition One of the days of TCB? Megan Fox & Machine Gun Kelly Pam Anderson Casting choices of the olden days Hawk Tuah Girl & the Hawk Coin PUAs! Zan! Women famously love taking care of grown men Zan the baby man  The Warrior’s Repose The classic Aztec tent Zan is proselytizing at the bus stop! The warrior and the…poet? Death and delight We’re waiting for women to be nice! Say your name in THE WIND Text us or leave us a voicemail: [phone]TCB Follow Us: IG: @thecommercialbreak TikTok: @tcbpodcast YT: youtube.com/thecommercialbreak www.tcbpodcast.com Executive Producer: Bryan Green Hosts: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Producer: Astrid B. Green Producer & Audio Editor: Christina Archer Christina’s Podcast: Apple Podcasts & Spotify To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This message is sponsored by Greenlight. We all know the old saying about teaching Amanda fish, and as parents, we want our kids to learn the things that will set them up for success. So this holiday season, give kids money skills that will last well beyond 2024 with Greenlight. Greenlight is a debit card and money app made for families where kids learn how to save, invest, and spend wisely with parental controls built in. Sign up today at Greenlight.com slash odyssey. Greenlight.com slash odyssey. Hey Chrissy, best to you. Best to you, Brian.

Best to you out there in the podcast universe and happy holidays. Sometimes podcasts like ours will take off a lot of time during the holidays, but not us. We're Gluttons for Punishment. So we have the 12 days of TCB coming at you, December 13th through the 25th, brand new episodes every single day, and live fresh episodes

during the entire holiday season. As the great Clark Griswold once said, Holy s***, where's the Tylenol? Find it quick and join us this entire holiday season for brand new episodes of The Commercial Break. Feliz Navidad, Feliz Navidad, Feliz Navidad, Feliz Navidad, Feliz Navidad, Feliz Navidad, I want to wish you a merry Christmas. I want to wish you a merry Christmas. I want to wish you a merry Christmas from the bottom of my heart.

I want to wish you a merry Christmas. I want to wish you a Merry Christmas. I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas. I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas from the bottom of my heart. The next episode of The Commercial Break starts now. Santa! Oh my God! Oh yeah, cats and kittens, welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green, this is my elf on the shelf, Chris and Joy Hoadley.

Best to you, Chrissy. Best to you, Brian. Best to you out there in the podcast universe. Hope you're doing well, enjoying the 12 days of TCB. Actually, I think it's the 20 days of TCB we've decided. Yes. We've counted all of the episodes in a row. I think it'll end up being somewhere around 20.

And you are officially the winners there, the listeners. We are in a purgatory, but at least we're in a nice purgatory. We're here in our comfortable brand new studio. I do like sitting back a little bit like this. It's better than leaning on the table. I love the chairs. Yeah, even though I like the table look, the chairs, I do have to say, I think are an upgrade.

I think the whole studio's an upgrade. I think your jacket is an upgrade. This jacket is hot and loud. It is very loud. I'm wearing my Christmas greens here. Yeah, it's like a Grinch green. Yes, this was a Walmart 9.99 purchase by Astrid and she knows how to, if it wasn't for Astrid,

I'd be wearing a t-shirt for sure. Astrid goes, if we're changing this studio, you are not going to wear a fucking t-shirt every episode. And I was like, OK, I can agree. If we can do the studio, I'll change into something besides the t-shirt. Don't tell her I'll be back in t-shirts before too long. Because it's just how I'm comfortable.

What can I say? Listen, if Machine Gun Kelly can get away with it, so can Brian Green. Me and Machine Gun are exactly alike. Except for I'm not dating Megan Fox and we're not in a blood, like some blood brother marriage. They're expecting and they're also expecting to break up

because they just announced they're officially not together anymore. Weeks after announcing that they're having a baby, I think, right? I don't know. I haven't seen that last part, but... So I heard you girls talking over the break while I was actually working. And what I heard was that one out of 10 men in the United States are figuring out, or one out of 100 are figuring out that they are not the father of their child. Is that correct? Yes, that was a little snippet.

DNA ancestry? Well... Ancestry DNA? Well, it said, that was just the headline. It just said, why, you know, one in 10 dads or one in 100 dads are finding out they're not the child of their... Their child is not theirs. Yes. And I said, ancestry DNA.

Wow. Ancestry DNA is... It's a thing. Yes. It's another cauldron of flaming shit that our world has brought straight to our front door. I'm telling you right now, when they were looking for that killer of that, you know, CEO United guy, which we haven't talked about, but when they were looking for him, they were

checking databases, like private databases like AncestryDNA for DNA. I just don't want to have my DNA all mixed up in there, although I probably already do have my DNA. My twin brother did it, so now I'm fucked. Yeah, because we have shared almost the exact same DNA since we're fraternal. We got a few things. I wonder what's different in our DNA. It's got to be something about the looks, huh? Or maybe it's – so we share the same mother and father DNA that we share, like the general DNA. Of course. But then I guess the specifics are different. How does DNA work, Chrissy?

Tell me more. I have no idea. You're the twin. I can't believe you haven't researched this. No one knows, it's magic. It's a steaming cauldron of bits and bobs and little pieces of, I don't know, twine and hair. And what the hell?

Wasn't there two eggs? No, Chrissy, two Xs and one Y. And then two eggs. Eggs, yes, indeed, I don't know. Okay, my sister and I were talking about this the other day, so then if it's two eggs, is it also two sperm? Of course it is, yes, it's two sperms. So it's basically two separate babies.

It's two separate children in the same womb at the same time that are delivered. So you're just a sibling. That's it, that's all you are, You're just a sibling. That has known another human longer than most people. I mean, you know your mother, I guess, is that would be that argument there, but there's an extra human being that you know longer than anybody else has and you've literally shared the same birth canal almost at the same time. But that's a, it's a thing, but it's not like identical twins. We do not feel each other's pain. Although I will say there has been times when serious life events

have happened, and I have sensed that something was going on with my brother. But I think a lot of siblings feel that way in general. Like, I don't think, I think best friends can feel that way, husband and wife can feel that way, father and child, daughter, you know, daughter and mother, whatever it is. Anyway, back to Machine Gun Kelly. Maybe he's not the father and he found out and that's what's upsetting him. Could be. Machine Gun Kelly and Megan Fox, they are blood married.

They took that blood oath or whatever it was. And so- Does that mean they're sharing DNA? They're certainly sharing DNA. I mean, listen, you're a certain kind of kooky wooky when you do blood wedding, you know what I'm saying? I get it. I get it.

Sometimes you just so in love with somebody, you know how when you're in love with somebody and you want to eat them? Have you ever felt that? Yes. You want to eat them? Not like cannibalize them. Snuggle all in. Okay, army hammer.

Yeah. Eat them. Yeah. No, no, no, not like army hammer. Eat them. Just like you wish you could like ingest. There was a level of intimacy that was further than the level of intimacy you could get by all the normal means, like, you know, sticking your penis inside of them. That you had other ways of getting intimate.

You like the smell. You like the smell. You can chew on them. Yes, chew on their arm and make it bleed. Anyway, Megan Fox and Machine Gun Kelly no longer together. MKG, the magic is gone. But by the time this comes out, they're probably back together. No, I don't think so. I think Megan Fox- The pregnancy was the deal breaker? What?

The pregnancy was the deal breaker. Here's my take on Machine Gun Kelly and Megan Fox, in case you want to know. Because I'm very interested in this relationship, believe it or not. Because they are a certain kind of personality, like wacky out there, all eyes on them, they don't really give a shit, but of course they give a shit, that kind of thing. And they find comfort in each other's craziness, right? I think. This is what I'm garnering just from public information, because I have no inside track on Megan Fox and Michelle Goodkelly. But they take comfort in each other's craziness, but that craziness can also wear on you, right? And it can wear on the relationship. It's exhausting. And it's a constant circus around those two, constant circus. Like,

we've talked about this before on the show. When two people are involved in the circus, it, the pressure is really on like, you know, Jennifer, whatever, Jen Lopez and Ben Affleck. When that circus gets really heated, it's like a pressure cooker. It's either to come out with diamonds or it's gonna crumble like a piece of shit. And I think MJQ, whatever his name is, MJK, MGK.

I think Machine Gun Kelly and I think Megan Fox, they've been is, MJK, MGK. That's a club you're gonna play in. I think Machine Gun Kelly and I think Megan Fox, they've been under that pressure cooker for a long time. And I can imagine that certain kind of crazy has started to wear on them. They took that blood feud or blood oath or whatever the fuck it was. And as soon as that happened, I mean,

how many more tattoos can you get of each other? You know what I'm saying? You're running out of space on your body. I think that they stay at least disassembled for a long period of time because they need to cool off from the craziness. That's my opinion. Lauren Ruffin That they'll just be attracted back together like magnets. Jared Sussman Who else? I mean, you shared blood with it.

You have tattoos all over. Who else are you going to get together with? Like Tommy Lee and Pamela Anderson, you know, they take comfort in that certain kind of crazy, right? Then they break up and it's disastrous for both of them. They're like both really hurt and they're- Blue agrees. Blue totally agrees. But now they never got back together once Pamela and Tommy Lee separated.

They did, they got back together and then- Oh, are they back together? No, not now. They're definitely done now. But there was a period of time where they were break up, make up, married, divorced. She just got nominated for a Golden Globe for best female, best female performance in a musical, I mean in a drama.

I saw that. Yeah, for the last show girl, I think it's what it's called, the last show girls. Very interesting. I want to see that. I like Pam Anderson. I've always liked Pam Anderson. I thought she's... She's definitely got a certain attraction.

She's got a genesiqua. She does have a genesiqua, other than just obviously her physical beauty, but she's, yeah, she just seems fun. And also she's a mother, so she's kind of got that side to her. And now she's got that show, but basically where she went back to the beach, her beach house in Canada. Oh, she did? There's a whole show. It's a reality show. Oh, she did?

It's a reality show? Oh, very interesting. They follow her around? Yeah, she does all her homebody beach stuff. Hot take. I mean, not hot take, but here's what I always thought about Pam Anderson. I never thought she was the most attractive,

to my opinion, my objective, my completely subjective opinion, she was never the most attractive woman. I know that people went gaga over her like Marilyn Monroe. It's a certain type. It's a certain type, and you're either into it. Why I liked Pam Anderson was her personality. She always seemed like smarter than the average bear. Do you know what I'm saying?

She was like in on the joke. She understood it. She drove the bus. And I know that she may not agree with that 100% because I didn't live her life. I don't know. But the same reason why I like Jenny McCarthy. Like not the most, you know, to me, not the most, like I would prefer Daisy Fuentes if you go back to that era, than Jenny McCarthy. But at the end of the day, Jenny McCarthy was always in on the joke. And that to me was attractive. Like I liked their sense of humor. I liked how smart they were.

I liked that they were in on the joke. That was it. So I wish nothing but the best for Pam Anderson. Hopefully she gets that golden globe knot. And I would like to see the last Showgirls. Have you seen her? Sure, I have not. I wonder what it's about.

I wonder if we knew anything that we were talking about here on the commercial break. Can I give you a fun fact about Megan Fox? Sure. Her ex-husband is Brian Green. Oh yeah, no, I know. Brian Austin Green. It's Brian Austin.

He was a 90210. He was a 90210. But you're like, I'm not married to Megan Fox. And I'm like, well, you were. Yeah. Yeah, you didn't have the same name. I've told this story before, probably many years ago on the show.

But when I moved from Chicago to Atlanta, I was 12 years old. Maybe going on 13 years old, something like that. And obviously, I moved from Chicago to Atlanta, I was 12 years old, maybe going on 13 years old, something like that. And obviously I moved with my family. Brian wasn't taking a bus on his own down to Atlanta. The show 90210 came out in that summertime or in that period of time when we had just moved. Someone in the neighborhood in Chicago started a rumor that the Brian Green on the show was

the Brian Green that had left the rumor that the Brian Green on the show was the Brian Green that had left the neighborhood. Same Brian Green. When I came back to Chicago the first time after that show had been running, kids- You rode that wave. I rode that wave. Kids thought, well, I mean, all they needed to do is take one look at me to understand that that was not the same guy that was on TV.

Plus, I think Brian Austin Green at the time was like five years old or six years older than I was. I mean,, I think Brian Austin Green at the time was like five years old or six years older than I was. I mean, clearly I was not. No, all those kids that were on 90210 were way older than high school. They were in their 30s. That's how you did it back then. I mean, 21 Jump Street. Johnny Depp was like 41 playing a high schooler or something like that.

That was a great show, by the way. 21 Jump Street. Oh, you had your kick recently, like a few years ago. I would sit, edit the show and watch 21 Jump Street and Laguna Beach. Those two shows were on repeat on Pluto TV or whatever. But it makes you realize, not only were the show premises absolutely ridiculous, but then the people that they got to play the characters were absolutely ridiculous. No one would believe that Johnny Depp was a high schooler or that Jason Priestley was, you know, a sophomore in high school. I mean, it's

just absolutely ridiculous. And who was the other guy, the guy who passed away? What was his name on 90210? Oh, Luke. Luke, Luke Perry. Luke Perry, yeah. And then Shannon Doherty's gone now too. Did she die? Yeah.

When? We talked about it on the show. I thought Shannon Doherty was still alive. No, she died of breast cancer. Oh, I don't remember. I'm so sorry to hear that. Shannon Doherty was like a mega, mega star when 902 and Oakmont in July. Wow. Oh, the people that we've lost this year, in memorandum. A lot of people. In memorandum. We would do an in memorandum here, but we'd probably get it all wrong. We have many times quoted people to be dead that aren't in fact dead, and then people to be alive. Chris Christopherson for one.

Chris Christopherson has been dead for no years. He is in fact still alive and kicking. But you know what we have done this year, as we've done the 12 days of TCB, we have gone back so far and looked at events, content or programs that we have enjoyed over the year that you have enjoyed. You have told us as listeners, you've enjoyed in 2024. And one of the things that has really resonated with people, good, bad and indifferent, has been our focus on the pick-up artist community. And more specifically, the PWAs, and more specifically, the PWAs who go to the 21 convention. I said Pua, like, Haak-Toua. Haak-Toua.

Haak-Toua. Speaking of Haak-Toua, let's make a side note here. Did you hear about this? Yes, the meme queen? Or whatever? Oh, I have been diving into this. This is fucking insane. First of all, let's say that yesterday we started the show by saying that Kylie Kelsey had the number one podcast

in all the land on her very first episode of her very first podcast. Congratulations to her, no shade. Yes, absolutely. No shade whatsoever. Congratulations to her. She knocked Joe Rogan out of the top spot. That is a mighty feat because Joe gets big, big, big numbers. But then the Hawk to a Girl is

like the number five most popular podcast in all the land. How is the Hawk to a Girl more popular than the commercial break? I mean, it's probably easy to understand. It's more entertaining, but I'm telling you right now, that is a crazy feat to be the number five podcast in all the land. That means you're getting millions and millions of people listening every single episode you put out there. Haktua and all of her infinite wisdom, and I don't know this girl, I don't know her from, I have not paid attention to this story. I think it's kind of ridiculous that she got so famous for saying two words on a street in Nashville, but whatever. People apparently liked her personality.

Yeah, and she took the opportunity to cash in on it. She took the opportunity to cash in like a lot of these, like, new age, new media stars do, and she rug pulled a bunch of people with a meme coin. Let me explain very briefly. Meme coin is an altcoin. It's just like Bitcoin or any of those others. It sits on a block to Bitcoin. Bitcoin! Bitcoin! I can't help it every time I hear Bitcoin. The meme coin, however, has no function whatsoever.

There is absolutely no... That means they can build in utilities into its special programs and prizes and access that you get for being a meme coin holder, which is apparently what they tried to do with this hoctua coin or the hawk coin, as they would say. She hyped up this hawk coin, got in bed with how we Mandel's cousin, his name is doc Hollywood. And apparently he's like a, like, I don't know, some kind of meme coin expert or something. So listen to this. Or the name like Dog Holiday. Listen to the math on this.

For early investors and people who knew Hawk to whatever her name is, what is it? Kylie, Kayleigh, something like that? Hayley, Kayleigh, I don't know. She and her team in their infinite wisdom gave 17% of the total coins to insiders, basically, and then released 3% of the coins to the public. She pressed this hard on her podcast, on her social media. She tried to get people who have no clue about any of this stuff to buy this meme coin. And then the moment that it went public, 17% of the people who were holding onto it who knew what was going on, sold immediately because they cashed in. That's what you do.

It's called a pump and dump scheme. It's a rug pull. I'm using this very fancy terminology from Twitter spaces. It's a rug pull. And basically you are throwing the losses to the people who are unsuspecting while you cash in as an insider. A rug and tug, if you will. And she got a rug and tug. She got a hock and a two and a rug and a tug. And people are pissed with some people saying there's jail time involved for some people. And I don't know, because, you know, listen, if you're into this altcoin shit, you got to be ready to lose money. That's just part of the game.

It is just a scheme. It's just a pump. It's all pump and dump. There's really no utility. You don't go to Starbucks and use your hock to a coin. That doesn't happen. It's just never gonna happen. And there are millions of these meme coins out.

I mean, hundreds of thousands. There's got to be meme coins. And this is how some of these new media stars are getting rich. They do this meme coin or altcoin coin and then they pump and dump it. I mean, even Donald Trump's coin is having trouble taking off. But Akhtu is seems like she's in big trouble and still the number five podcaster in the world. Do we need a meme coin? Do we have any memes? To coin. Not really. So it's hard to do a meme coin when you're just two idiots on a podcast.

The TCB coin, break coin, break your bank coin. Sorry you spent so much money. And by the way, at one point, right after Hock2a's coin was released, the total valuation of all the Hock coin out there was half a billion, with a B, dollars. Half a billion dollars. And then quickly went down to $40 million after everybody sold. And every bunch of the insiders made money

while all the other people are just left holding the bag. That's why they call it a rug pull. And it's terrible. So I have a suspicion that Hawk herself, Ms. Tua, had no idea what she was getting herself into that she also was not knowledgeable about. She was trusting the doc. That's right.

But she made some money. There's no doubt about that. And that is problematic. So we'll see what happens with Ms. Tua and all of her hawks. Her hawkies, I don't know what you call them. What does she do on that podcast? She does interviews. I listened to like the first one.

So. How did you find it? Because it was all over the news. No, I mean, how did you find it? Was it good? Was it interesting? Oh, how did I find it? It was okay.

I'm speaking in old English. How did you find it? How did you find it, milady? I searched on Apple for it. No, I mean, how did you find it? Did you find it well? It was okay, but I never went back to it. You never went back to it because you didn't like it. No, I mean, how did you find it? Did you find it well? It was okay, but I never went back to it. You never went back to it because you didn't like it. Let's just be

honest about it. You didn't like it. You found it to be boring. It wasn't interesting. I haven't listened to any of it. I've seen some of the video and yeah, she's got celebrities that come on there. I think she had Jojo Siwa recently. Listen, you know, no knock. If you could get Jojo Siwa to sit in this seat, you'd be out the door, Chrissy. I'd have Siwa in here in one second. I'd have her gyrating on that couch in a heartbeat. All right, so let's take a break. When we get back, guess what, kids?

Today for the 12 days of TCB, something very special. We're going to go back to our poise, the 21 convention and Zahn. Zahn took up a considerable amount of our energy and effort this year. I think we did five total episodes on Zahn. Lest you think we've done all the Zahn there is to do, Zahn just keeps on talking. So we have more of Zahn Penan, Perian, whatever his name is, the very sad Pua, I think is the only way to say it. What did you say, the Jack Sparrow knockoff? Greasy hair, big belt buckle, and dad bod all together, and he will tell us how many books he hasn't sold and how lost his life is when we get back. Oh, also want to remind you, please,

the St. Jude Foundation, the St. Jude series of hospitals, always accepting donations to provide free care to children who have life-altering illnesses like cancer. Their main hospital in Memphis, we'll put a link in the show notes, and also the National Breast Cancer Coalition Fund. Both of those things we're focusing on for the next couple of days. If you would be so kind as to drop a few dollars their way, the link on the show notes goes directly to their website. We do not get in the middle of it. We are simply shining some light on it. I just want to make that clear, lest you think we're going to take the money.

We're rugged and tugging. Yeah, we're rugged and tugging. Our meme coin is St. Jude and the National Breast Cancer Foundation. Yeah. Yeah. So go there, donate some cash, make yourself feel good, and we will love you forever. Send us a screenshot and I'll send you an extra sticker or two or something like that. Okay, let's take a break. We'll be back.

In a shocking turn of events, it's me again, Christina, your producer and resident rom-com lover here at The Commercial Break. And I just have one thing to say. I'm just a producer, standing in front of an audience, asking you to follow us on Instagram, at The Commercial Break, and on TikTok, at TCB Podcast. Text us or call us and leave us a voicemail because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with TCB, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible. And while you're at it, go to our website, tcbpodcast.com, but you don't have to because

we like you just as you are. Now, if you immediately got those references, you're my kind of person, but it's time to take a break and listen to some sponsors and then we'll get back to the show. This episode is sponsored by Free Alcohol from Zbiotics. and then we'll get back to the show. Can I have a great night or a great responsible day tomorrow? A tough choice to make, indeed, that is until I found pre-alcohol. Zbiotic's pre-alcohol probiotic drink is the world's first genetically engineered probiotic. It was invented by a PhD scientist to tackle rough mornings after drinking. And here's how it works. When you drink, alcohol gets converted into a toxic byproduct in your gut.

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take care of my 12 to 13 children, still record an episode of the commercial break, and make it to bedtime with a little bit of energy left in the tank to watch bad television, I know that pre-alcohol has done its job. And with the holiday season upon us, I know I'm going to be consuming just a little bit more alcohol than usual, but with pre-alcohol I can stay on track and not let the holiday season throw me off course. Go to zbiotics.com slash commercial to learn more and get 15% off your first order

when you use the code commercial at checkout. Zbiotics is backed by a 100% money back guarantee so if you're unsatisfied for any reason they'll refund your money no questions asked. Remember to head to zbiotics.com slash commercial and use the code commercial at checkout for 15% off. Thank you to Zbiotics for being a sponsor of the commercial break and for making my mornings after drinking just a little bit easier. Hey, friends, I'm Sharon McMahon, host of Here's Where It Gets Interesting. Each week I speak with authors, experts and thought leaders on everything from American history and democracy

to how to be a better person on the Internet. And don't miss my extremely popular Dacu series, which educate you on things you never learned in history class. Follow and listen to Here's Where It Gets Interesting on the free Odyssey app or wherever you get your podcasts. All right, and we're back. Spreading some Christmas cheer all over the place, as is our network.

Can you please do more episodes? No, we can't. How many more episodes can we do? I can't do any more episodes. That's it, I'm all full up. But you know what, I like this because here's the thing, 12 Days of TCB gives people something to look forward to at the end of the year. Not us, but other people, something to look forward to at the end of the year. Not us, but other people. Something to look forward to at the end of the year.

Gives us a chance to review the year properly, where we don't have to try and fit it all into one show, like we did last year. I think last year we tried to fit it all into one hour. Number one, number two. Number three, it gives people something to listen to during the holidays that is completely unacceptable for any kind of family activity. So it gives you an opportunity to get away from those rat ball children and your shitty uncle Tom who won't stop talking about you know what about the entire dinner and listen to some funny shit. So okay, one of our favorite things to do in 2020 for really in for the last two years has been pause pickup actually since the beginning of the commercial break, we've been doing pick up artists,

but we've really started to refine our target. And that is the 21 convention. The 21 convention is an all round man haven, I guess. I don't know what it is. I mean, it's like, it's mega, it's masculinity, it's the patriarchy, it's trad wife, it's all things dipshit. These guys put together these conventions, but the convention is no longer. It suffered from some financial issues like no one showed up. And so I think it imploded.

It imploded because the guy who started it, I think he had some financial issues himself and he took the convention down with him. But then people weren't happy with him either. Am I right about that? They were all upset because he wasn't paying them or wasn't... I don't know what the... Who cares about the 21 convention? What I care about is the content that they put out over eight years of doing this convention. It refined itself. It got more weird and more extreme and more plaza out there. I actually saw human. More plaws are out there. I actually saw a, like a video of one of these pickup artists telling you how to text a woman, how to get a woman in bed by simply texting her. And had it not been so visual, I would have done that one. But I felt like we should go back to someone who

really occupied quite a bit of that space, that pliss space for us this year. In season number four, it was Michael Anthony. The year before, it was Frankie B. The year before, it was that weird guy talking into the camera. I can't remember his name, season number one. But in season number five, no one occupied as much time as Zan Perrion, the very sad pick-up artist who is down on his luck. But don't worry because he still, things are going to work out down on his luck, but don't worry, because things are going to work out fine for Zahn.

But he's here to share with you about all the tricks of the trade, Chrissy, and how to get a woman in bed and make sure that the patriarchy stays alive and well. I can't wait to hear. Let's pick up in the middle of a Zahn conference appearance here as he talks about men with women in their lives. Here you go. Who women adore. Men who have women in their lives all the time. Women take care of them. They just, they love them, right? You know what it is, the number one? Well, it's complex, but I'll try and sum it into a little simple thing. The men of all of history who have women in their lives who love them and take care of them have two qualities.

Counterbalancing, remember upper lower energy I talked about? Counterbalancing. Zahn is the guy who told us that you gotta make sure you have counterbalancing energy. You gotta make sure you have that intellectual, strong personality type, but then you have to have that thrusting penis motion. You've got to slap your balls right into somebody. Which I've been trying out at the grocery store

and it seems to be working fine at the local croaker. Just letting you know. There's simultaneously two women, a father figure that says, don't cross this line. I like you, don't do this. I don't like that. Eh, eh, eh, eh, no. I like you, but I don't like your behavior.

Imagine that, what a phrase to say. What a phrase to say to a beautiful woman. You know what I'm saying? What a phrase, and then put your hands out, like block your face. I can't imagine if I had said that to any of the women in my life. There's a line, don't cross it.

I like you and I don't like this behavior. I don't like it. But I like you. Powerful. Powerful. So powerful, it's never worked. So powerful, women don't get it. I can't understand.

So there's a father figure that says to put her in her place, don't cross this line because I have, this is the way I want it to be, my dear. It's kind. It's gentle. Oh, the kind and gentle kind of don't talk. The kind and gentle don't talk unless spoken to. It's invitational. It's sweet.

You're not like, I don't like this when you blah, blah, blah, blah. I'm inviting you to shut the fuck up. How do you feel about that young lady? It's not that kind of energy. It's like listen, listen baby listen. I like- Listen sweetie, baby, honey, listen. All that yammering. I don't know what the fuck you're talking about. But I'm inviting you kindly, gently to shut the fuck up. Do you mind? Do you mind? Don't cross the line.

And by the line I mean the threshold of my door. This is the man cave where all man things happen. There's thrusting energy in here. You got to be careful. There's balls swirling around everywhere. I don't want you to get smacked in the face. Cute. I don't like this behavior.

Don't do it again. Look in my eyes. Don't do it again. Look in my eyes. Don't do it again. So weird. I cannot imagine under what circumstances I would talk to another human being like that, except for my children.

Like, I talked like this to my children, look in my eyes, don't do that again. You know what they say? No! No! That father figure saying, no, don't do it. No, I don't like it. Powerful men that have women in lives have that spirit. At the same time, they have the spirit of these little boys who are lost.

And they're... I think he just summed up... I think that's a little self-aware. I think he just summed up his entire existence. A little boy who is lost. Calls to the life-giving mother essence of women, which they have. I don't care what modern society and media says,

they have it. In other words, there's a little boy caught in a cookie jar like this, and mother walks in, and he's standing on the stool like this, and she goes, what are you doing? Are you also marveling at his body type? Yeah, his gestures and miming out a kid in a candy jar. We got it.

We understand. We've seen a kid in a candy jar before. And he goes, okay, why are you so cute? You can have a cookie. Right? Right? Am I right? Powerful.

Hello! Listen to that crowd, they're riled up. I'm not sure who gets a better audience reaction. Taylor Swift at the last Harris concert or Zod at the 21 convention. It's close. It's close. She played Wimbley, he's playing Wakegan. It's close. It's close. She played the, no, you know, she played Wimbly. He's playing Wakegan. It's close. In other words, the strongest men with women are men who say, don't cross this line, I don't like it.

I don't like that behavior. And they're simultaneously little boys who are like needing help and they can't adjust their color. And women have to watch behind their ears. And like, if you're only this cool guy who's got 100% figured out and you don't give the women the chance, the woman in your life, the relationship in your life to take care of you and like, to inspire you and to be that woman.

Ah, nothing that a woman wants more than a small child to take care of. Can you watch behind my ears? Okay. Okay. Brian needs moomoos. Brian needs his moomoos milky. I made pee-pee-poopoo. Can you watch my little Tee-Tee? I tickled on myself. Yeah, Astrid is going to love that. Oh yeah. Astrid, I made a booboo. There's a booboo in the toilet.

I made a booboo. I made a booboo. I made a booboo. I made a booboo. I made a booboo. I made a booboo. I made a booboo. I made a booboo.

I made a booboo. I made a booboo. I made a booboo. I made a booboo. I made a booboo. I made a booboo. I made a booboo. I made a booboo.

I made a booboo. I made a booboo. I made a booboo. I made a booboo. I made a booboo. I made a booboo. I tickled on myself. Yeah, Astrid would go, love that. Oh yeah. Astrid! I made a boo-boo! There's a boo-boo in my pants. But don't cross that line, bitch! Thrusting energy! You... You rob her of everything.

She wants to take care of you two. And that's why women in relationships will start drama and start fights and start You rob her of everything. She wants to take care of you two. And that's why women in relationships will start drama and start fights and start poking at the guy because there's no energy. It's like he's just like this flat-lined guy. So they try and cause a drama or cause a fight or cause some trouble. Or they're going to actually say, shut the fuck up, and you don't need me to change your diaper. Yeah, that's right.

I mean, tee-tee-ta-ta. Can you wash behind my ears? Where are you getting these women? So this is the conclusion that I've ever come in my life. I've never heard anybody in my life say it. Well, there's probably a reason why, Zahn. Men who love women are loved by women. That's the way it works.

Matthew 16 Men who love women are loved by women? Matthew 16 Oh, that's an Instagram quote to go on a nipple picture if I've ever seen one. Here's my conclusion in life. Here's what I figured out, because I've been there, because all men have been there at some point in their life. We make the mistake of, especially I think early on in life, we make the mistake of supplementing a woman's

love outside of our mother's relationship for a love like our mother's relationship, and we do become childlike. We think that it's a job of a woman to take care of us in certain ways. And what I've found is that's not exactly a precursor to hot sex, you know what I'm saying? If you can't do your own laundry and you have to be taken care of and every little issue becomes a drama unless mommy takes care of it, then the woman will start to think of you like a child. It's oftentimes, I think sometimes, my opinion is, I think sometimes a woman's first child is their first boyfriend because that's how men act in a lot of cases. It's just a learning curve. But at 72 years old or however Zahn is, he really needs to, like, grow up a little bit. Women don't want someone

to take care of. I mean, listen, I think we all care to... If you're empathetic, you're a caretaker. You want to take care of people. Like, when they have the flu, not like on a Tuesday afternoon when you, you know, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, we're, The band needs his lunch. Where's my lunchbox, mommy? They get a free pass. Now this, if you're, the men of all of history who have women who are just like, oh, that's just him, he gets away with it, you have to prove something to me.

No, that's just him. He's on our side. He's on our side. You guys know what I'm talking about. It's the men who get a free pass. It's because they have this strong father figure engine. Don't, don't, here's how I want it to be, baby. I want it to be like this, and that's what I want it to be.

And I will not bend on that. I will not bend. There's no bending whatsoever. This is how things are going to be. I have declared it for my... Hello, honey? Hello? Those are my car keys. Where are you going? I said I demand it. Thrusting

energy! Thrusting! Pee-pee-poo-poo. Instead of following her around, we hear about this leadership energy. Guys, guys are being taught this. If you want to do something, you tell the girl, I want to do this. I want to, I choose this movie. But there's no point in that. If my girlfriend, I say, hey baby, listen, let's go to a movie and say, what would you like? Did you have a preference? Because I don't care.

Right? And if she says it. I mean, that's just a considerate thing to do. Wow, that's just like human basics. Yeah, are we gonna have to teach this, really? We have to teach consideration? I mean, if you're going to see a movie with someone, wouldn't you want them to be interested in it also?

Yeah, your relationship or friend, whatever. That said, this is the guy who got dragged to all seven of the, you know, what do you call them? One of those movies? Oh, the shades. Fifty Shades of Grand movies. You know, I'm not sure this one, then I decide. Okay, okay, I'll decide. Let's go. So, there's still a give and take, there's still an energy of that. You see? I'm not demanding my way or the highway. No, no, no, not at all. I love my

girl. You want to do this? Okay, baby, let's go there. I'll go with you because I like you and I want to do it. So, that's that strong leadership energy says no don't cry but if she crosses a line but but but but but but but but but hold on hold on there's qualifications here but but but but but see what is he considering crossing the line? Well, Chrissy, I don't really know what I'm talking about but let me try to explain myself. A man, a woman wants a man to have strong leadership energy if you're gonna go see this movie, what do you wanna see? But then he also wants someone to take care of.

I got a little lipstick on my collar, mama take care of it, tee-pee-poop-oo, tee-tee-ta-ta. But don't cross that line, thrusting energy. Up here, but down there, over here, left and right, I don't know, up and down. He's saying nothing. I'm saying nothing. No wonder it's booked in so it's four tomes't nothing. No wonder his book didn't sell. It's four tomes of fucking nothing.

I don't like it, baby. Listen. Listen to me. Listen to my voice. Look at my eyes. I don't like it. I like you, but don't do this. I don't want it in my life.

I don't want this energy around me. Don't do it. You see? I see. You see? You see here? You see what I'm talking about? Am I making a point what I'm talking about?

Am I making a point? I'm trying to make a point. At the same time, if you give that- See, now I'm remembering exactly why we think Vizazan is so funny, because he never, ever quite gets to the point. No, he doesn't. I'm emphasizing his point, I know. Totally unplanned.

Oh, that was so good. Brian, you're so good. I'm so glad you're here. I'm so glad you're here. I'm so glad you're here. I'm so glad you're here. I'm so glad you're here. I'm so glad you're here. I'm so glad you're here. I'm so glad you're here. Totally unplanned. Totally unplanned. That was so good.

Brian just read the cover of the book. That's it. I just had no idea that was coming. Give her the ability to take care of you, and her mother instinct comes out. There's something called the Warriors Repose. Oh yes, the Warriors Repose. I love the Warriors Repose. It's a haiku. Are you ready, Chrissy?

I'm ready. Pee-pee-poop-poop. Bison. Uh-oh, I made pee-pee-poop-poop. Will you clean it up? Will you, will you? What movie shall we go to in this fortnight? Don't step over the line or I'll hit you with my balls tonight. Pee-pee poo-poo. Bison. The Warriors repose. Imagine this, an Aztec warrior out there fighting battles.

Oh, no! Fighting warriors. Bringing it all the way back to the Aztec warrior out there fighting battles. Oh, no! Fighting warriors. Bringing it all the way back to the Aztecs. So similar to today's times. Honestly, I mean, I feel like he got his entire outfit, all of his accessories, out of Walmart in New Mexico. Well, listen, so did I, so I don't want to make too much fun today. Going on battle, which you have this spirit of like going

out there and he comes back into the tent with his woman. Didn't the Aztecs have those beautiful structures that are uncovered in the rape forest? I'm pretty sure they had pyramids, entire towns, but they came back into their tent. Their tent? I'm pretty sure tent is a rather modern thing in the grand scheme of things. And he crawls into her lap like a cat. This fierce warrior. And he puts his head on her lap and she's stroking his hair and says it's gonna be okay. That's what we're missing. That's what we're craving from women.

The warrior's repose. You go out there and you fight. The warrior's repose is to crawl up in a woman's lap. I like to crawl up into a woman's lap, but I think that can be true set of anybody. Is that everybody likes that kind of, that coddling every once in a while. We all get into a head space or emotional space where we just want to lay on someone's lap. It's your big hug. Yes. Battles and you fight your warrior and you come back and she has the grace and the feminine

energy. I'm going to go murder some of the natives and I'll be right back. Lay my, I'm going to be like a pussy in your pussy. I'm going to come curl like a pussy right in your pussy. Tee tee ta ta. To rebirth you and say it's going to be okay. We want that and we're missing it across the board. Modern women saying, well, what are you going to do for me and blah blah, what do you do

for a living? I'm a warrior. Yeah. I just murdered a bunch of people to try and save our civilization. Now get back to my tent. Sit down so I can lay on your lap. Get back into my age-old house. I'm going to kill you.

I'm going to kill you. I'm going to kill you. I'm going to kill you. I'm going to kill civilization. Now get back to my tent. Sit down so I can lay on your lap. Get back into my eight person quadra tent from Patagonia. I know it's under the bridge, but just get back. I just spent a thousand dollars at REI, now get in there. What do you do for a living? I don't know, Zahn, but I think there's a few steps before getting in a woman's lap, and I think knowing what you do for a living is probably one of them. Just throwing that out there. Of course it is 2024, and shit's weird.

It's all broken. But take heart, because it's going to change. It's going to change. Is he going to change. It's going to change. Is he going to change it? I'm starting a silent, silent, silent revolution with my belt buckle. Stare into my belt buckle. That's right. My swinging balls will hypnotize you into curling up in my lap

and doing my laundry. I feel it. It's going to change. I talk to, you know, all over the world. I talk to different groups. You talk to, like, people at the bus stop, I think is what you meant to say. And, uh, it can't sustain. It's gonna change. It can't sustain. Anyway, I talked a lot. I got a few minutes left for any questions. Oh, questions. I love this. Yeah. Is there anybody in the audience? No, no. Hello? He's just swinging his hand back and forth Hallelujah

Everybody in the back say what? Everybody in the back say what? Please, somebody run to the microphone Please, somebody run to the microphone I think he's got his band line Okay, let's see, we'll take one question and then maybe we'll take a break Okay, let's see, we'll take one question and then maybe we'll take a break Questions for Zan

He's the only one up there. Anybody got questions for Zan? Are you here to see Zan? No, no, no, no, no. The indoor pool's that way. Anybody else here for Zan? Free books at the end of the conference. Zan! Did you hear what he had to say? I mean he just, it's gotta change. The Patriarch is clearly gonna be back in style in a few months. And Zan just, any questions? No? Okay, I'll ask a question. Zan, what do you do for a living? Hi girls in the back. Hello. Oh my god This is embarrassing why they cut this out of the YouTube video

Like even I'm not that dumb Even I cut out dead air from our show out dead air from our show. Terrible. That's poor Zan. I really do sometimes feel, I mean, I feel empathy for everybody, but for Zan especially, because he didn't sell the book, he's trying to write a second one, he's got a daughter who he thinks might love her at some point. I mean, it's just like, it's a terrible situation for Zan. You know, but by the way, this goes on for an additional 30 minutes. So clearly somebody asks him a question. Hey, really great talk. I especially love the end piece about the warriors and poets. And I was just hoping that you could speak towards, so I'm someone when I first meet

someone, I have a lot of, like a wide range of interests and ways in which I can act authentically. And can you- But congratulations. Wabam! I can act authentic when needed. Wabam! Warriors and poets. I don't think that that's what that he said. No. He said, yeah, he said warriors and- Repose? Yeah, the Warriors repose playing like how you Transition from the warrior to the poet when you're just

Someone so it doesn't come off as you're being incongruent with yourself totally, if that makes sense. Yeah, kind of. Well, yeah, kind of. This is a tough one, but let me opine for the next 15 to 20 minutes without making a point. I'm going to make a point. I'm going to make a point. I'm going to get to a point here, just a point and a point.

There's a couple points before I get to the point. I think, I don't know, like. I don't know. This is not really my line of expertise transferring from the warrior to the poet, because I never said that at different conferences altogether. It's a simultaneous thing. If you feel the energies of both that, whatever you're talking about, the poet and the... The poet and the penis. If you feel the poet and the penis... Whatever you're talking about, whatever you said. What did you say? I'll say it back to you and then we can talk back and forth. How's that?

It's called a conversation. In the warrior. And you express it to her. That's powerful. That's a powerful thing. That is penis powerful, bro. Like, I'm a big advocate of speaking your truth, whatever is going on in the moment. I really, I believe it. If you like a girl, if I like a girl, I'll say, I like you. I don't know why, but I like you. If I want her in my bed, I want you in my bed. That's what I know.

Hello, what's your name? You should be a- Hey, girls in the back. Hey, girls in the back. What's your name? I want you in bed. Meet me in room 212. That's a junior executive suite.

I'm gonna blow out now. I've got a stand up shower and a tub. Hey now! No blood stains on my carpet. Be a great lover for me, I say it. So to speak that, what you're talking about, is there is no transition. Teaching a generation of young men how not to get laid.

Zanperion, everybody. You're simultaneously both. And you forgive yourself everything. All seeming mistakes. And I think that's a powerful takeaway I hope you guys get. You forgive yourself every seeming mistake because we think we're not good enough, but we're more than good enough. Uh oh, computer crashed behind me.

Okay, let me explain. On the video here, there is not a screen behind it because it's not that kind of conference room. It's like literally like one of those meeting rooms in a Holiday Inn. He's got a Vizio TV fresh out of the box with the stand and everything. And behind it, it just has 21 convention written on it. And all of a sudden, someone's browsing the internet on that TV behind him. And Microsoft nonetheless. Microsoft, the wave of the future. Okay, why not, this is a good place to take a break,

I think, Christina. Let's take a break. Just a quick reminder, the future. Okay, why not, this is a good place to take a break, I think, Christina. Let's take a break. Just a quick reminder, the St. Jude's Foundation and the National Breast Cancer Coalition Fund, both of those links down below in the show notes, do us a favor and maybe yourself a favor in the future. You never know. Donate to those two very fantastic causes. Help a brother out.

We'll be back. Have you been missing something from your life? Of course you have. You listened to the commercial break and what you've been missing is me, right? No? Damn. Well, if what you're missing is a little giggle, you should follow us on Instagram at the commercial break and on TikTok at Tcbpodcast because you know we're posting clips, we're being silly, you'll get a little laugh out of it, I promise. If what you're missing is communication, text us or call us and leave us a voicemail at 212-433-3822 and someone will respond, definitely. Unless you're being creepy or mean, in which case we won't. And lastly, if what you're missing is a jaunt through the internet,

check out our website at tcbpodcast.com and explore to your heart's desire. And those are really all the ways I can help you. So maybe you're missing something from our sponsors? Let's find out. All right, back here with Zahn in 21 Convention. Zahn is teaching us men how to, you know, be, basically the title of the video is how to be with a woman in your life.

And okay, fair enough. We could all use a pointer here and there. So far what he's told us is incongruent, to use a big word that someone in the audience use, and does not make much sense. He wants us to both be a warrior and a pussycat. He wants us to need women, but tell them that we don't need them. He wants us to make decisions for them, but make sure they're involved in the decisions. So I just don't know what to think of Zahn.

Zahn is a master at not making a point, but there's a lot of people- Thank goodness for the PowerPoint behind him. Yes. Thank God that someone is now browsing the internet behind him. He's captivating the audience. I'm not kidding about that, guys. I am not kidding about that. I hope you get that.

I hope you really receive that. Oh, I'm receiving it. Any other questions? So the guy asked specifically, how do I transition? How do those two things live between the poet and the warrior? And how do I really do that? And Zahn ended up telling him, just everybody forgive themselves. He means it. Forgive yourself and you don't do it. You don't transition. You just do it simultaneously. Yeah, same at the same time.

You drag the woman by the hair while you're telling her how much you love her Haiku no No No, I just keep talking if I was here I mean I've had this happen it's embarrassing But you just keep going you power through through. When the questions section of the presentation doesn't end up being so fantastic, you power through. You gotta have backup contents on. You can't just stand there and go, no, no one?

Because it sounds worse. I got some questions. I got some questions. Maga, 2028. Questions, MAGA 2028. So you have always been known about talking about ease and delight. How would you? Oh, ease and delight.

It sounds like the next Krispy Kreme special. Join us at Krispy Kreme for 99 cents ease and delights. Did he say ease and delight or ease into light? No, I think he said ease and delight. Okay. I don't know. Like ease and delight though. In a nutshell, how does one live a life of ease and delight?

You know what, I'll tell you this. I'll tell you this. Let me make some points before making a point. First of all, my tie's by the beach. Second of all, I don't know. Look at his brain working. He has no idea. He probably wrote a whole book on it.

He has no idea what he's talking about. Huh. Huh. He has no idea. He probably wrote a whole book on it. He has no idea what he's talking about. Huh. Huh. Well, next question. No? Let me tell you about something, boys.

Oh my god. I guess it goes back maybe to the Stoics. To the warrior? The Stoics! It goes back to the Stoics. To the warrior? The Stoics! It goes back to the Stoics. Because of what I think of, ease and delight, I think of the Stoics. Like Plato,

he lived a life of ease and delight. Roman bathhouses and cocktails by sundown. Ease and delight. Who talked about... No, goes back to the book of Ecclesiastes. Oh, the good old Ecclesiastes. Oh my god. It was like a precursor to us. No, no, no, no. Wizards.

Hold on, hold on. Wizard of Oz, Chrissy. It goes back to Wizard of Oz. There's nothing new under the sun. All is vanity, says the preacher. King Solomon went out and found Nothing new under the sun. All is vanity, says the preacher. King Solomon went out there and found it. And nodded, uh-uh. Mic drop. Mic drop.

Got that? He had 500 concubines and 300 wives. He had riches above all the riches. He had wisdom above wisdom. And he writes the book, The Ecclesiastes, which is, I sought all of this in this world and all is vanity. By that it means none of it matters. The sun rises on the rich and the poor, the good and the bad. Matthew 15

Says the guy with 500 concubines and all the riches. Beth Dombkowski And then you're easing and delighting your way through life. Yeah, yeah, yeah, delight, ease and delight, or delight. Imagine this, Mark Twain said this. Mark Twain! Mark Twain. Imagine quoting Mark Twain.

He's all over the place. Oh my God, the Bible. Ecclesiastes, Mark Twain. He's all over the place. Warrior Stoics, the Bible. Ecclesiastes, Mark Twain. Prince. Mark Twain said this. What did Mark Twain say? Let's see what's on. You die.

They memorialize you for an hour. And forget you forever. Well. And there you are, you're delighted. I guess that sums it up, we've all been delighted. When you die, everything, all your possessions... are going to disappear, like the wind. And here's the truth, nobody's going to remember you.

That's the truth. Nobody's going to remember you? What kind of fucking... There's no delight in that. Absolute bullshit is that. That is such negativity. Nobody's gonna remember you. That is the nature of death. You become remembrance. That's what it is. And it's likely at least one person will remember you. I mean, maybe in Zahn's case, some people will be forgetting, but...

What a shocking thought. Shocking. When I look at it. Wait, he's talking about death and the guy asked about ease and delight. I know. Ease and delight. I'm from Canada, so I grew up in the wilderness with no sense of history, no old building. Oh, God remember that. He took a 20-mile journey with a strange man. It came out changed. I'm sure it did. Yeah. Just a little light touching. It's old school pitoing.

Back when pitoing was fun. The warriors did it. Just a little old school butt padding. The people in Europe have all this history that they grew up in and they take it for granted. And you know, when I see a portrait I see a photo of a woman from 1880 She's smiling like this with a glass of wine looking at black and white photo of this woman

I'm thinking she's young and pretty probably 21 years old And she's 100% forgotten today And she's 100% forgotten today. Oh, my God. Wow. Way to get the crowd going, Zan. Pipe them up right out the door with death and dismemberment. They're never going to be remembered. So what are we doing here today?

Nothing. Gone. He's come to the defeatist point in his life. Oh, yeah. Yes. And that shocks my mind. How is that possible that all she dreamed and all she loved and everything she tried to, and she tried to create things and stuff like that, and it's all gone and forgotten?

In other words, whatever you're in your head about, whatever you're trying to... But I want to point out one thing, Zahn. You are in fact remembering her. I know. That's what I thought tooahn. You are in fact remembering her. That's what I thought too. You're seeing a picture of her. So now you have become the guy who's remembering the lady who was forgotten. Micromanage means nothing. It means nothing. I mean, I get the point, but it's not really...

This is it. This is your last life. He's not artic last night. This is it well. Yeah, he's not yeah, but I guess articulation has never been Since we've known him we're waiting for something else to happen waiting for women to be nice finally. It's not gonna happen Well, okay end on a high note send him out the door all No We're waiting. If not now, then when? Later. That's my philosophy. If not now, then when? Well, a little bit later. Just a little bit later. After I take a nap. Can I get a bite to eat? Do you mind?

I'm hungry. After 90 day fiance, I promise. That was from a Greek philosopher. If not now, then when? Ask yourself that. If not now, then when? Well, when I save up some money. If not now, then when?

That Greek philosopher. I'm telling you guys, this is a call to leadership. This is a fight of your lives. There's no more time. When I came out of Nicaragua, when I was embedded with the sand of East Ends running drugs for Jimmy Carter

and the CIA, let me tell you something. He is all and the CIA. Let me tell you something. He is all over the place. I thought I had time, but I learned an old Nicaraguan saying, pretend you're making a point when not making a point, that you shall have fabulous riches beyond riches. My concept was this, and I wrote this phrase, it's in my book, and you're going to see it in my book,

because I'm giving you a free copy because no one will buy it. It affected me greatly. It's this. Every great life has had a great renunciation. Boom. HEEEH! I'm sorry, can you repeat that? I could, I could, how do you spell renunciation? Every great life, I'll say that again.

Every great life has had a great renunciation. We're this self-help generation. Everybody here has got self-help books sitting on their shelf. You've got programs you've signed up to, to try and understand something about yourself. This one, for instance. This book I'm about to give you for free, for instance. And it's not necessary to read the book. Oh, well, that's good.

I just look at the cover and get everything I need to get out of it. It's enough that I bought it and it's sitting on the shelf. I got the answer right there, yeah. Right? We buy these books, we don't read them because, but there's the answer right there. And when we read that book, we read the next one, we read the next one, we go to the next program,

we go to the next weekend conference, we go to all these conferences, we do all this kind of stuff. Like this conference you're at now that you paid all this money for. To watch my transitions slowly get darker. His transition length has gotten darker and darker. And the evening has worn on. Chasing that.

But I'm telling you, that is not enough. That is not enough. Okay. What was he saying again? I said it earlier. I don't know. I'm totally lost? I said it earlier. I don't know. I'm totally lost. I have no idea.

I'm trying. I thought it was ease and delight, but I guess we've moved on to suffering and sorrow. Nothing matters. It's gonna take everything you've got and more. If you wanna have a life, if you want women to look at you like, who's this guy? Go into the wind and speak your name, like I said earlier.

Go call him. Brian, Brian. Brian. Tie in the wind, tie in the wind, chick-a-pie. You're such a stoic. Who was that, Jodie Foster and Nell? Oh, right. Tie in the wind, Tie in the wind.

Tie in the wind. Climb a mountain and don't tell the soul that you did it. Well, what's the point of I'm climbing a mountain? I'm telling everybody. Instagram, bitches. I can't climb Everest without a few good reels to go along with it. No other point. How am I supposed to get laid when no one saw me at the top of Everest? Please, Zan.

Go into the world and hang around your heroes. Go seek them out. Say, I want to learn something. Well, what's your phone number, Zan? Because that's where I want to go. I'm with you, buddy. I want to fight for something. I want to... That's where you go. That's the power. It's that important. What?

Meanwhile, Zan's going to go home, play some Fortnite, and eat a cheeseburger from McDonald's. That's right. He told us he plays that. I round them up tonight. I really got them going. I pulled out my stoics. I pulled out Ecclesiastes on their ass. Mark Twain.

Nothing like a little Mark Twain to end the afternoon. Alright, I think that's a good place to wrap it up with Zan, because how much can one take of making no point trying to make a point? Oh, Zan Zan. What of a kind. Well, you know, listen, he's not the worst TUA we've ever seen. That's for

sure. He's not the best, but he's not the worst. And what I mean by that is he's certainly got this idea, weird idea stuck in his head about women and relationships. He's trying to be enlightened in some sort of way. Yeah, but just pulling out quotes from every chapter in history does not make you enlightened. It doesn't. I'm sorry. I wouldn't know because I'm not enlightened. I'm not claiming to be. But I do know that this is not it. I'd probably go with that chick in the white headdressing. What was her name? Bajran? Yogi? Yogi Bajran? That's more my flavor. I like ayahuasca. That's more my flavor. It's mild compared to Zon. I'd rather do a night of ayahuasca than a night with Zon.

Oh yeah. God, and this thing is two hours and 40 minutes long. Can you imagine sitting through two hours and 40 minutes of this underneath that lighting in that Holiday Inn conference room? No thank you. Oh, okay. All right. So here we go. We're trucking along 12 days of TCB right on through Christmas and beyond. All right. Through Christmas and beyond. We will be here every day with a brand new episode. I think this is a Sunday episode that we're recording right now. So I think that will officially be the first ever Sunday episode of the commercial break. So there, there you go. Breaking new

ground every single day, Chrissy, breaking new ground. All right. TCB podcast.com. That's where you go. More information about the show, all the auto, all the video, and now all episodes are available on video, either on the website, on Spotify or YouTube.com slash the Commercial break but when you go to the website and we implore you to you can get your free Sticker if you go to the contact us page drop down menu. I want my free sticker. Give us your address away It will go Also, if you make a donation to st. Jude's foundation or the National Breast Cancer Coalition fund Send us a screenshot and we will send you some extra swag. 212-433-3822, 212-433-3TCB,

questions, comments, concerns, content, ideas. Add the commercial break on Instagram, TCB podcast on TikTok. Follow us, like, comment on your favorite video. We certainly would appreciate it. Okay, Chrissy, that's all I can do for today. I think so. But I'll tell you that I love you and I love you best to you. Best

to you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, we always say we do say and we must say good bye. I have it! Have no family to celebrate Christmas with this year? The commercial break is live the entire holiday season to make you even more miserable than you currently are. So put your Christmas pajamas on, gather around the Christmas tree and listen to brand new episodes of the commercial break.