The Commercial Break - C-Suites & Bullsheets!

Episode Date: August 14, 2023

All you need to make your business successful is a C-Suite that you don't pay and 6-10 side hustles, according to Adam. But then again, he is a liar. Is Pete Davidson a love bomber? Producer Christina will do her best to find out Justin Trudeau is getting a divorce Fireside dumpster fire Bad interviewers Matchbox 20 & one of Bryan's former lovers Krissy looks wonderful! Back to Adam the Liar Other people call this a ponzi scheme Thanks for dying, Grandpa! You have to flow the web! CEO CFO COO CSO CIO CLO CNO The banks want to see this It’s all about the C-Suite, but paying them? Nah LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us or leaving a voicemail at: 1.855.TCB.8383 Speak to TCB LIVE by calling 775.TCB.LIVE (1.775.822.5483) Tuesday-Thursday 12pm-5pm EST Watch TCB on YouTube Creator: Bryan Green Co-Host: Bryan Green Co-Host: Krissy Hoadley Written By: Bryan Green Exec Producers: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Content Production & Research: Tina Khano YouTube Producer & Editor: Morgan Please Producer & Audio Editor: Christina A. Executive Director: Astrid B. Associate Producer: Gustavo Episodic Contribution: Marianne, Diane, Natalie, Will The Champ, Will D** Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You are in bed! I am not in bed! I am in my office! That's a bed! This is the office! The time here is 3 o'clock! This is office hours! On this episode of the Commercial Break... You're no longer a widget maker, Debbie!

You're now the CEO of WWCWTW Incorporated Inc. And what do we do? I don't know! Wet flows! WWCWTW Incorporated Ink And what do we do? I don't know! Wet clothes! Get a C-suite and report back to me when you're making money! The next episode of the commercial break starts now! Oh yeah, Kazuketsu! Welcome back to the commercial break!

I'm Brian Green! This is my dear friend and wonderful co-host, and joy. I hope my best of you, Chris Best of you right? Best of you out there on the podcast universe. Thanks for joining us Okay, we all know about beat David's its epic run of very attractive women He's he's been on I mean there's Since Warren Beatty donned the Dick Tracy costume and gave Brian a little 15 year old man boner.

I can't think of any man that's been on such an epic run at Hollywood as Pete Davidson. And recently I read an article where Kim Kardashian said she regretted getting involved with Pete so quickly. Oh, she did. Yeah, after her Kanye thing,

and that the fame and all of the buzz around that relationship made it nearly impossible for them to connect on any kind of meaningful level as well as travel and other stuff that they were dealing with. But I think basically what she was saying is I should have never dated Pete, it's kind of a dumb dumb. You know what I'm saying?

It felt to me like a passive aggressive stab in the back. Like, hey, I know I dated Pete, but I really didn't mean too. I bet he's a love bomber. Of course he is. Yeah, that was a wrap. Of course he is. You used to get swept up. You do, we've all, I mean, I hope all of us have been love-bombed

if you haven't. It's a wonderful thing to go through. It'll definitely ruin your life. Yeah, I don't know. For six to 12 months. Yeah, it'll end badly. You'll hate yourself. You'll turn into a monster. They'll be a monster.

You know, love bombers usually come from borderline personality disorders or narcissistic personality disorder. None of which I understand Pete to have. I don't know the guy. I think he's lovely. I think he's a lovely human being. And besides him saying something to say, like go kill all the cats to Peter or something like that,

some shit like that. I don't know. You got no fight with Peter. Who gets no fight with Peter? Not like, Peter files, like, Peter, the actual pet organization, the people who try and protect animals. People for the ethical treatment of animals. Yes, which nine times out of ten, I agree with Peter on whatever it is they're currently, you know, talking about. But Pete then caused unnecessary drama by yelling and screaming at them. He also crashed his car into a couple of people's houses.

What was he doing? I don't know. But not since Pete Davidson, not since Warren Beatty has another man in Hollywood taken so much oxygen out of the room with the beautiful ladies then Pete Davidson. However, I think we're about to get a Person in the mix that may do better than Pete Davidson Because it's just been announced as we're recording today. It's just been announced that

Justin Trudeau, not Justin Thoreau, Justin Trudeau, the prime minister of Canada is divorcing his wife of 18 years And I know one thing if I know one thing in this life, I know one thing in this life. And that is Justin Trudeau, his one. Sexy motherfucker. Yeah, he is just, he's prime for action. Yeah, he's got the looks, the power, the money. I mean, he's the total package.

I think there was a little while, but you know, when Donald Trump was in office, and Ivanka was at some kind of state dinner. She's been a namer. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. I could see Ivanka and Justin hooking up. Who wants another guy who ever she's with? He seems like a one-in-complaney baby.

Yeah, you can't get one. No one gave me a billion dollars for my shitty office billing, me. But Ivanka, I don't know. Listen, I got mixed feelings about Ivanka, but I leave those aside, that's not for the commercial break. What I will say is that I think Justin Trudeau

is the prime minister of one of the best countries in the world, just from my outside observation, fucking Canada. I mean, Canada, who doesn't wanna be prime minister of Canada? They got legalized drugs, they got a lot of open spaces. Beautiful country. Beautiful country, wide open a lot of open spaces. Beautiful country. Beautiful country, wide open borders.

People say hello to each other. I mean, it just seems like a lovely place, based on second-city TV that I watched a lot. You know what I'm saying? So Justin is a handsome dude. He's in the prime of his life, and now he's going to be single and ready to mingle as the prime minister of Canada.

I can only imagine what kind of action this guy is going to put a big and power for a long time for like ten years i think right what how i would say i guess they don't have a limit i don't know because of the you know they are they're like that yeah it's canada they just do things different over there they don't want to be bothered they don't be bothered with the new prime minister i mean i don't really know how the canadian political system works i don't know why he's been in power for so long but he's been in power for a long time. There was no one guy, remember the one guy that went crazy.

Oh, he was awesome. The crack addict, the crack smoker. He was great. We did a few shows about that. Oh yeah, Rob, what's his name? He was the mayor of Toronto or whatever. He was awesome. Why did you guys get a hint of him?

Listen, I don't agree with crack smoking in office, but you know, you only need to be in office eight hours a day. What you do on your private time is all good. He's something like a real spitfire kind of guy. Yeah, smoke a little crack. He let people film him smoking crack. That's how poor decision making played a role in this guy's life. He let people film him smoking crack. Rob, I wanna say Rob Thomas, but that's the guy from Matchbox 20, which is also not who are also,

is that it from Canada? Are they? I don't know. You remember that. This is totally off subject, but this is the way the commercial break works. Do you remember we used to for like three and a half minutes we tried this thing called Fireside.

Yes. It's own part in part by Mark Cuban in this lady named Fallon Fatemi. Met him both. I've talked about it on the commercial break way back to the beginning. I got an invite to dinner to a party with Mark Cuban spend some time with him. He was a lovely human being. As was Fallon, she was a lovely human being also. Whip smart, great people.

They had this clubhouse idea, fire side. But the whole difference between fire side and clubhouse was, clubhouse let anybody open a room and then just let the cream rise to the top, which is now falling to the bottom. You know what I'm saying? Clubhouse is no longer the place to be. Fire side was gonna pick their horses

and they were gonna ride them. Kind of like choosing, being very careful about who they chose to create on their platform, and then they were going to give them production and creative support. It was a great idea. Man, did we get excited about this? I thought, this is it. This is the big break that commercial break has been looking for.

And little did I know that it was just a shit show waiting to happen, or it was already a shit show, and I was just getting involved in it. I understand how difficult it must be to make a platform like this work, but I opened up the app about two months ago. And all of the sudden there's like a history channel television show that's playing on the app. You can't get into a room quote unquote, you can't get into like a live show. It's like scrolling, you scroll and it's television shows. Old Judge Judy, yeah, old Judge Judy episodes, like, you know, Pet Whisperer, Dog Whisperer, whatever, you know, a bunch of psychics are on there,

television psychics are on there, and I'm like, wow, that's really strange. So what apparently this turned into is a mix of both people creating shows, like three people creating shows, and then they seem to have bought a lot of old television shows and are just rerunning them with commercials on the platform. Kind of bizarre.

So it's like a tubi or a Pluto or something like that, right? Hulu, whatever you want to call it. It's a streaming platform for old television shows and no one wants to watch. And it appears that there's no one on the app either. Now, I don't know that to be true. I'm just sharing my own observations. So I'm scrolling through there.

And once every 55th scroll, you'll get a person that's not famous like a non-television show creating a show on Fireside, like a clubhouse room, with video. Which was the original intention. Which was the whole purpose of this in the first place. But guess what the show is. The show is somebody interviewing Matchbox20 with Rob Thomas and the guitarist and everything. And so I thought, okay, I'll bite.

Let me see what match box 20 is up to. You know, Rob Thomas for like two minutes was the most famous musician in the world. Oh, you mean so smooth. Yeah. Just like a no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no of it. I'm part of it. I'm part of it with Garland Santa. Man, I'm part of it. I'm part of it. I'm part of it. It's a great song. It's a great song.

It's a great song. It's a great song. It's a great song. It's a great song. It's a great song. It's a great song. It's a great song. It's a great song.

It's a great song. It's a great song. It's a great song. It's a great song. It's a great song. It's a great song. It's a great song. It's a great song. It's a great song. It's a great song. It's a great song. It's a great song. interesting information about them. They ended up spending the entire time name-dropping people that I hate when celebrities do this.

They name-dropped people, it's like they'll ask them a question. So tell me about the new album and how you got to this out the most milk toast question ever. Tell me about the new album and how you guys came up with this idea to make it about your mom, y'all, whatever it is. And then they'll be like, it's great. You know, Terry Thomas connected us with Ed Zungdung

from, you know, he recorded the album Ed Zungdon from you know he recorded the album for the Zunkas back in the 70s and then what we had to do is we brought in curly Shirley and curly Shirley really help us refine the sound and then we had a great engineer named Top Top and he uh Top Top was really great on the things of the was it a top top was a top top top top top top top top top top top top top top top top top top top top and you're like who the fuck cares cares? Who cares? There's a proliferation. P-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p- that no one wants to hear the answers to. I hate these interview shows, especially podcasts. Interview shows where they interview people who have obviously are out of their prime.

I think it's relevant if you can get information out of them that makes sense is funny or is interesting. When you ask them the same question about the same thing or you have on a super famous person or person that was super famous and then you ask them the most rando question that no one gives a shit about it's just bad interviewing that's all it is it's just bad interviewing you get I was listening to this podcast the other day and they had on a rock star from the 90s a rock star you would want to hear from

somebody you would be interested in understanding their perspective of their particular slice of fame in the 90s. I'm not going to say, because that'll give it away. I'm not going to say, I'm not going to talk shit. But I will tell you this, that they spent the entire time talking about other television shows that they were watching. This interviewer had 45 minutes with the guy and he spent the entire 45 minutes allowing the rock star and then he got involved in the conversation discussing nothing but television

shows and like string theory and all this other stuff. Not once. Not once. Did they get to any of the music, any of the interest, any of the rock stardom that this guy went through and how interesting his life must have been in that moment not once. It was the most wasted interview I had ever heard and it kind of made me upset because I was like, I really would have loved to hear from this guy on his perspective about what was going on in that moment in time when all these bands were blowing up and he was part

of it, part of the mix and MTV and all this other stuff. And guess what? All I heard about was the fact that he liked to watch, you know, the, I don't know. And see, I, yes, Sacramento or whatever the fuck they were talking about. Drown me crazy, crazy, crazy. If I had this guy on, I would go straight for the meat and potatoes. Did you or did you not fucking woman with a fish? Tell me. You know what I'm saying? Like, that's what that would be my first question because I want to know. Or tell me what it was like to be at MTV Spring Break. Yeah, sometimes they have a list of things that you can't ask people.

I didn't realize it was a thing. No, I get it. But here's a phenomenon that's happening with the commercial break right now. It's beyond. It's a phenomenon. And I'll tell you what, it's a phenomenon because it's phenomenally unbelievable. I've never heard of phenomenon and I'll tell you what it's a phenomenon because it's phenomenally unbelievable I never heard phenomenon and commercial break mentioned. No, I know You haven't heard why I'm using the word yet Here's a phenomenon that's happening because it's phenomenally unbelievable that anybody's doing this We are getting emails and I'd say like on a clip of one or two a week of people that are pitching

DR PR people that are pitching their Oh clients as guests on our show. Now, don't get excited out there. It's not like I'm missing an opportunity to, you know, talk to Brad Pitt about his new movie. I'm missing out on talking to some guy who wrote a book on how to doodle for dummies or whatever the fuck people are talking about. Some nobody, some motivational speaker that, you know, speaks at a fire station in Tacoma or some shit like that. Nothing interesting.

And they'll always start with the same fucking bullshit. I came across the commercial break and I think it'd be a great fit for my client to come on and have a discussion with you. And it's like, have you ever heard the commercial break? Did you really for one minute actually listen to an episode of the commercial break? Because your guy who wants to talk about quantum physics is not the right fit for the commercial

break. It's just not. It's not going to advance either of our careers any further and trust me. We can't get any further down the rabbit hole in our careers right now. What do we do with our life? Well, it's the kid who really hook up the equipment the right way. No, I can't understand how to get guests on the show. Even though I wanted a guest, they have to come into the studio and then we don't have room

for them. So even if I had Brad Pitt right here, I'd be like, Brad, let me give you a microphone so you could sit off camera. And Chrissy and I got a, you know, we got a thing going on here. There's a floor pillow. Yeah, there's a floor pillow. You might sit on it. There's no camera angle, but you have lots of camera types.

You can see you in movies. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You go to see a movie with Brad in it. Then you'll know. People want to hear you. You want to hear you. So did you fuck a woman with a fish? That's all I want to know, Brad. It's it is just mind blowing to me that you waste this kind of time and this lady wasted that kind of time with matchbox 20. Not like matchbox 20 has a super interesting rock and roll stories. They seem like the most bland rock and roll band that's ever lived, but I have to admit there is one song that I like from Matchbox 20. I believe it all is coming to an end. I guess we're gonna pretend that's the how far we've gone.

You ever heard that song? Yeah, yeah. But then they go into a Beatles song. She came into the bathroom window. Okay, so they combine those two songs and when they do it live, it's really good. Like, it sounds really good. Okay. They're tight, they're on it.

I like it. I like the rock and roll. Like, it's very rock and roll-y. I like the whole thing. I'll take your word for it. Okay, take my word from it. I know it worked out to Chili's. One of the three Chili's that I worked out here in Georgia. I worked with the Chili's. I think I told you. I'll take your word for it. Okay, take my word from it. I know I worked at the Chili's, one of the three Chili's that I worked at here in Georgia.

I worked at the Chili's. I think I told you that I met this girl at a bar and me and my friend made up a story that we were back up Olympic swimmers during the Olympics. Yes, yes, I do remember the story. And in a smoke break, the girl and her friend, they're older than us. They're like, let's call it six, they're older than us. They're like, let's call it six or seven years older than us.

So we're like 19 at the time, they're probably 25, 26 years old. They go outside for a period of time. I think to smoke a cigarette, they excuse themselves from the table, we go to smoke a cigarette. We come back to the table. As a limpic swimmer, that's what you would be doing to smoke a cigarette. Well, that's why we went to smoke a cigarette.

So, well, they also caught on to that too. They were like, you guys smoke cigarettes, annual Olympics, whimmers? But we both had shaved heads, and at that time, not a lot of people had shaved heads. So we convinced them somehow that we were back up with Olympics whimmers. We had this whole fucking story going on.

We'd love to do this, walk into a bar, make up a story, you know, not hurt anybody or anything, you know, just have fun with it. We were having... That's right, then alter ego. So, they come back to the table, and this girl has a pile of pictures in front of her. And the pile of pictures is from her sister's birthday party

and I am in one of those pictures. Her sister was my good friend. Her sister was my friend. And this girl had been at the party and I was so fucked up, I didn't realize that this girl was at the party. Fast forward three or four years later, I am working at a chileys with this woman

that I had tried to convince I was an Olympic swimmer. So her and I, all good fun. Yeah, I'm a good fun. Remember when I was a Olympic swimmer? No, I'm a co-cada Chili's. Could I get a Kid's Margarita? Rochambo baby Rochambo. Kid's Margarita.

Kid's Margarita. That was the code word. That was the code wordvagar Rita. Oh, it's a good word. That was the good word. I can't believe no one ever caught on it. Or they did catch on it, they just didn't care. So we're working at this same chile. And I think just like at the bar years before, I think she had taken a liking to me

and I took a liking to her. So she invites me over one day to come to her pool. She lives in the apartment complex, she's gonna come over to her pool. So I go over there, go upstairs to her apartment. She's dressed in this like, slinky bikini, you know, she's looking good, right? She's old and I am. I'm still at that age, I'm scared of pussy, so I don't really know what to do. I don't know where they want to, you know, I'm just kind of sitting on the couch trying

to act cool. And she's like, you have got to hear this band. It's gonna blow your fucking mind. And remember, my whole claim to fame at this time is that I was one time in a band. And like, you know what I'm saying? That was like, I was a musician because at one point I happened to be in a band.

I was a musician, but it's just a different world back then. And when you said that, there was like some people, you know, sometimes that got you somewhere, right? And so I'm just sitting there and I'm like, she's like, you're gonna love this, that's a musician you're going to love this. And she puts on matchbox fucking 20's album and I am distraught.

I cannot believe the dribble that's coming out of the speakers. And I'm trying to understand exactly why this woman would think I would like this music. But I didn't like it very much. But you said you did. But I said very much. But you said you did. But I said I did. Of course you did. I said I did.

So, I don't fast forward a couple months later. And now, you know, we occasionally like hook up randomly. She comes in one day to work and she goes, I'm taking you on a date. And I'm like, oh, sexy. I like it, you know. I'm still at that age where I'm scared of you. I'm pussy date and I'm like, oh, sexy, I like it, you know? I'm still at that age where I'm scared of you. I'm pussy, I'm you, yeah. But I don't know, I'm like intimidated a little bit

but I think it's cool and interesting. And I'm like, wow, are you taking me? She's like, it's a surprise. But next Thursday, be ready at 7 p.m. I'm picking you up. And I'm like, okay, this is exciting. What are we gonna do? We're gonna do a sex shop. Maybe there's gonna be like a three way,

you know, that I don't have any experience. My chiropractor convention. Chiropractor. Chiropractor, chiropractor, meth convention, yeah. So I'm like, wow, she, and so on, what I wear, where casual, comfortable, it's gonna be a great night.

Okay, great. So I put on the only pair of shoes and pants that I own. My dog martins. Oh, my dog martins. With my, you know, bell bottom jeans and my orange 33 t-shirt. And so I put that on thinking I'm all sexy and cool with my big chain around my wallet. Yeah.

And I hold it in place. I get in the car and she starts driving and I'm like, where are we going? You know, South, South Atlanta, South going down 75. And I'm like, where are we going? Where could we possibly be going? And then I realized, we're going to the amphitheater, the local amphitheater at the time called Lakewood Amphitheater.

And I'm like, are we going to Lakewood Amphitheater? And she's like, maybe. And I'm like, oh, who are we gonna see? What you got in store? Sound garden, Pearl Jam, Nirvana's? Who, what do we got? I mean, Kurt's dead at that point, but you know, what do we got on store?

Are we gonna parry forl, portal for prurals? What's up, you're sleeve? I know, it's gonna be something great. We are seeing match box 20, and I was like, No. No. Oh, that's. You're inside.

No. On my, yes. On my inside. No. On my, yes, on my inside. No. So we go to this concert and it is, I am not into it whatsoever. Like the opening band. Sometimes bands are always better in person though. So the opening band is like jelly.

Remember jelly? They had that one song like like garbage pay old kids, whatever the song was by jelly. I think it's the name of the band. And then there's like three opening bands and then matchbox one. I'm just kind of bored. I'm sitting there, you know, I'm sitting there drinking

and drinking and drinking and drinking. And drinking and drinking. I'm more drunk and getting more drunk and getting more drunk. So eventually I'm like, I'll be right back. And I just have to get out of this. We're sitting in the seats that are close. I just have to get out of this. I'm sitting in the seats that are closed. I just have to get out of it. So I started walking around

and meandering and meandering and meandering. As you do. As I do. Well, the next thing I know, I am in another friend's car driving home. Like I'm, I had been. What's that you know? Next thing I know.

Like I'm so intoxicated. Oh. That the next thing I know, I'm in a car driving home with another friend altogether a friend I had not shown up with but I don't even know what's going on at this point so I'm like hey what's going on I found you playing on the lawn and I grabbed you I didn't know you like matchbox 20. Aren't they great? And I'm like, I hate them. Can you pull over so I can throw up?

So I throw up on the side of the highway, I get back in the car and I'm like, I'll wait, I don't, this is before cell phones. So I'm like, I don't, before cell phones were widely available in everybody's hand. I'm like, oh shit, I came with somebody else. And he's like, what? And I oh shit, I came with somebody else. And he's like, what? And I'm like, I came with somebody else.

And he's like, what do you mean? I was fidgeting the guy that the person originally thought the you should have by yourself. Chrissy, I'm a bad guy strong of a lawn. I don't know what he thought, but he was nice enough to be like. He was nice as a grab. Staying me up and drive me home.

Yeah, because your girlfriend couldn't have found you properly. It wasn't even my girlfriend. It was nice as a grab. Staying me up and drive me home. Yeah, because your girlfriend couldn't have found you properly. She was probably backstage hooking up with Bob. I know she was sucking a little Tomas dick. I was with my buddy. She probably left me there. She was probably like, whatever.

Yeah. You never liked that about 20 anyway. But. Yeah. So I'm like, oh fuck, I left this girl. I was supposed to drive home with her. I don't even know what's going on. He's like, oh bro, they're wearing no one near you.

You are dead. Dead to the wind. You are talking all kind of mumbo jumbo. I don't even think you knew my name. I still don't know your name. Who are you again? But I recognize your face. So he's like, let's get you home.

You call or tell you you're a home okay. And I'm like, oh, okay, good idea. I get home, I pass out. Boop on the couch. Yes. 12, 30, 1 o'clock in the morning, 2 o'clock in the morning, whatever, at time it was, phones ringing.

Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, I got a roommate at the time, right? And I can hear my roommates stumbling, there's only one phone in the house, it's downstairs. The townhouse has two stories. I'm passed down in the couch on the bottom floor. She's upstairs. I can hear her stumbling and I'm like, my head's hurting and I'm like, oh, fuck, the phone's

ringing. And I can hear, hello? Huh? Yeah, no, he's on the couch. Do you want to talk to him? Hello. Hello. Hello.

She was, she's doing a talk to you. Yeah, Hello. Hello. Hello. She was she to talk to you. Yeah. So my roommate comes over. I know that's all she wanted to make sure that's right. So my roommate comes over Brian, Brian. And I'm like, yeah, I can hear you. What? That was your lady friend. You know, the one he comes over every once in a while. She just called she wanted to know where you were. And I told her you were here at home safe and she hung up the phone on me. And I was like, oh, she did?

And she's like, yeah. And I go, okay, let me call back. I get up, I dial the phone, pah, pah, pah, pah, pah, pah, pah, pah, hey, it's color Cindy. Hey, Cindy, I'm so sorry. I bet you are. Click, I can't stop the phone on me. And I'm like, oh shit, I'm in a lot of trouble.

And I have a shift with this girl the very next day. Chrissy. Working where you. Shitting where you sleep. Shitting where you sleep. Dipping your pen in the company in Guest, they say. Dipping your pen in the company, kids, Margarita. Dipping your nib.

That's right. Dipping your straw in the kids, Margarita, as they say. Hey, hey, hey. It was the most uncomfortable few weeks with her because I, but you can imagine, like I really acted like an asshole. I don't know if I acted like an asshole intentionally, but I certainly came across as an asshole unintentionally.

I'm not even gotten too drunk, especially in the younger days. Yes. Well listen, I've looked for you a few times too, and we did have cell phones. It did. So let's just throw that out there. Same.

We had BBM, Blackberry Messenger. BBBBBB. I looked for you a couple of times. I was somewhere. So I was doing something. I was with Peewee at the porn. Ah. Ah.

We just ran into each other by getting the cheetah. Yeah, we always knew we were to find each other. Yeah, I knew you were OK. At the board. Ah. Ah. Ah. Here's Rann and do each other back again with the cheetah. Yeah, we always knew where to find each other. Yeah, I knew you were okay. At the bar. At the bar. At the cheetah. At the bar of the brave game. The cheetah.

At the 756 club. The 755 club. The 755 club. At your apartment, at my apartment, or across the street at that fucking bar that's at the fall of my money that no one likes to go to except for me. I thought it was great, everybody else hated it. I thought it was great because I could walk there and stumble home. Everybody else hated it because it was in a strip mall.

It was like the dive bar in the strip mall. I think all great dive bars should be in strip malls, don't you? I agree. Can we be in agreement here? Speaking of dive bars and strip malls i found this guy to dive bar to strip mall in the last episode we were uh... trying to understand exactly why adam the liar

had five hundred thousand failing businesses uh... that were directly attributed to his bad math i think we figured it out adam the liar has figured out why 500,000 businesses fail every year in the United States. It is not hard to figure out. I don't even think that number is real, but it's not hard to figure out.

I don't even know what he's talking about. It's not hard to figure out. You can't manage the growth phase or you never have a growth phase like the commercial break. And. You're spending half your money on advertising and marketing. You are. Web flow. Web flows. So Adam's suggestion is off the gross, take 50% put it toward more ads and then take 16.67% put it right in your pocket.

And then with whatever's left over, you're supposed to pay your staff and your business. That's right. I wanted to just get there a few more minutes of this because I know that Adam has some wisdom to impart to us that we just haven't heard yet some nuggets. By the way, you look wonderful today. Thank you. You look wonderful. I think you look so wonderful.

Congratulations. Congratulations to you, and to Jeff. I'm so happy for your family. Thank you. Well, I'm actually going somewhere after this. Oh, you are? Yeah, well, we'll get to it then. Let me not delay.

I was trolling on the internet. Hopefully I'll have a story. Yeah, please. Oh, good. Yeah, I know you're going out. Yeah, exactly. There's always a story to tell with that person. Yeah, lovely lady, but she's a story factory.

Speaking of looking for people who are drunk. Yeah. Okay, so without further ado, I was trolling on the internet. As I do like to do. Hey you, my podcast friend. I just popped in to say that you are the best part of T.C.B. And to show our appreciation, we want to give you a free WWFD sticker. It's the Whatwood Frankie Doe sticker you've been asking for. It's number 4 in our series of stickers and you get one just for being a friend of TCB. Go to TCPpodcast.com, hit the contact us button, tell us you want to stick and drop us your physical address. Those FedEx men's will be at your door post-taste.

We want to hear from you, your wild and wacky stories, dating disasters, ask TCB questions and now you can ask Brian's mom for terrible advice. Hey, I learned my terrible advice giving skills from someone, and my mom is that person. 1.855 TCB 8383. toll free from anywhere in the world is where you can send us your questions, comments, concerns, or content ideas. It's a real live phone line where we actually respond. 855 TCB8383. At the commercial break on Insta and TCB podcast on TikTok.

And please, do me one more favor. Go to youtube.com slash the commercial break. Subscribe to that channel. Morgan does a great job editing the videos to be released on the same day at Ayers here on the podcast feed. Now, let's listen to a word from our sponsors who keep this rambling wreck, fueled up, and ready to rock. And then we'll be back to this episode of The Commercial Break.

This episode is sponsored in part by Rocket Money. During the pandemic, I won on an epic run of bad financial luck. In part because I kept buying billboards in Iowa for the commercial break. Upon further investigation, as to where exactly my money was going, I discovered that many, many subscription services were hitting my bank account or my credit cards every single month, and I had not been aware, nor had I been using those subscriptions for months, and in one case, for years. Years I was paying these people. I needed these people to stop charging my credit card. I hadn't used their service in years.

That's what I got serious and I downloaded Rocket Money. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that allows you to cancel unwanted subscriptions. Monitor's your spending and helps you lower your bills all in one place. Over 80% of us have subscriptions that we've forgotten about and chances are just like me, they're digging your credit card to your bank account every month and you don't use the service. Rocket money is here to help. Our family is a big fan of this application. We've used it long before Rocket Money became a sponsor of the commercial break.

I have one finance app, Rocket Money that I can log into and keep up with all my comings and goings. All the subscriptions I'm paying for, my bills, it helps me track my spending, it even helps me save money. And now Rocket Money is allowing you to try it for 30 days absolutely free. I'm not going to be a bad guy. B.C.B. and thank you to Rocket Money for being a sponsor of the commercial break. Back to Adam the liar and his business advice on how not to become one of the 500,000 failed businesses every year. It has bread and water.

Yes, he's got a bread, the butter, or butter, the bread. I'm not sure what he's talking about. Notting a business, or even if you're already starting a business and your business isn't really cash flowing the way that you want If you're finding stress every single month about paying bills or worried about whether you're gonna make it off sale Can we pause this just for a minute for me to sell that for anybody who didn't hear the past one What we're looking at oh, yeah is Adam he's in front of a white board But there's a little library type thing in the back.

Yeah, it seems like a settings cardboard cutout. I don't know what's happening there. I don't know what's going on. There's our real books. They said, oh, that is a settings cardboard cutout. I thought that was a graphic on the show. No, that's actual. This is his little setup over here.

What do they call that? Analog special effects or whatever they call it? I don't know. He's got some weird thing. And the classic, the kicker is his shirt. It's a T-shirt tight, tight T-T shirt. T-T shirt. It says, I have come here to chew bubble gum and kick ass with a drawing of sunglasses. That doesn't make sense. I have no idea what he's talking about. He's got a neck beard, but not a neck beard. A neck five o'clock shadow that he shaved only half of his neck. Into a beard.

And I think what he's done is he's rented the local library for $10. You know, you can do that. We did it at the other holiday ends. Well, that's true. It's an upgrade from the holiday. He just got a library card this time. Just to go forward, it makes sense to have some kind of up-limentsary income that can cover the bread and butter.

For example, I run eight different companies. But I would say that the majority of my... All is in rather poorly. How do you run eight different companies? Well, I've never get a global corporate global. Corporate global investments in LLC. So nothing quite like when you incorporate an LLC with investments.

I'm coming from about four or five of those companies and each one of them is capable of covering the bread and butter. What that means is I could see a collapse in seven out of eight of my companies. And as long as one of the four or five larger companies survives, all my bills could get paid, and I'd be able to keep the roof of my head. I'm the people called as a bond,

these keep the, it's not! It's not! It's not. Other people call this multi-level marketing. I borrow from one to pay the other. That's right. I call it thanks for dying, Grandpa. I'm using the money wisely.

Everything would continue to grow. If you don't have a company capable of guaranteeing the bread and butter, then you may be somebody might want to consider having some free lunch contracts coming in, you may be want to partner with some bigger firms to make sure that you've got some lead regular cash flow. Or maybe you just want to have some kind of consulting gig or even a job on the side to make sure

that you've got all of the money necessary 16.7% of your net revenue. I want to share something. Well, he said gross revenue, you take the profit off the gross revenue and the marketing, but the rest is off the net. I don't get that. What are you talking about? First of all, secondly, I'd like to point something out. Having been an entrepreneur, having been a business person, for a person of business for most of my life,

and having started and closed a few companies, few more than, well, I've closed many more than I open, but you get what they're saying. It takes every inch of your being to make a company successful. You cannot then have four or five additional jobs on top of it, especially not when you're starting. I can understand doing a consulting gig on the side at night

to keep your family fed or whatever, but he's talking as if it's just easy to pick up a, you know, a couple hundred thousand extra dollars with consulting clients. What about web flow? It's all about web flows. If you don't have web flows, you're not flowing the web. And if you don't flow the web,

how are you gonna get your 16.7%? You gotta get out there, you gotta create more flows. More webs, more flows, more web flows. Now this all becomes incredibly important when we start thinking about the growth. Are you also distracted by the bulge in his pants that I am sure is a sock? Yes. Is it just not like a cock? It looks like a sock. Yes. Just like straight in the front. Yes. Yeah. It just like a big either has a hernia or a sock in his pants. He should have been a little left of the right. Yeah, you know, it's not how a dick works.

By the way, no one carries their dick straight. No one. I never carry my dick straight, sir. Are you telling me, sir, that you carry your dick right center? Do not impossible. No one's dick points do not. Not naturally. Because if you pay yourself out of the staff salary, which is essentially 16.67% of the gross revenue, that is the amount of money if you are the only staff member in the business that is available for you to be able to do these things.

If you're a staff, no idea what I just said. What did he just say? Like a bigger company and maybe you've got things like virtual assistants or maybe even actual staff, then of course the gross revenue you need needs to be significantly bigger. There is of course one other amount of money that you're going to be paying yourself, which is this 16.67%, which is a focus. Essentially, if we imagine that you're a solo printer, you're the only person in the business, and you would receive the gross amount of money, you would take half of it, put it aside for ads and marketing, the other half that's left over.

You're basically what he's saying is keep yourself as the only person. Then you're the only staff and you build a profit. And then that's where you just throw everything else to the wind of advertising and marketing. That's right. Okay. Let's take the commercial break for example. So you also pay the electric. Patreon based business.

You're making $5 a month that Astrid is paying to make us feel better about ourselves. You take $2.50 right off the bat and you put it toward marketing on your podcast. And then you take another, what's 16.7% of $2.50? Let's just say it's 72 cents. You take 72 cents, you put it right in your pocket. That's your money. You get that all 100%. That's all to us.

And then we split that two ways. So that's 30, let me do the math real quick. That's 47 cents a piece. So now 76 divided by two is 47.3. And then we have 47.3 cents each other. And then we have an additional 72 cents left over to pay the electric bill, the internet, uh, you pay that last, you know, go into debt. When I say I pay that last, I mean, I pay that last, like after they turn off the electricity and I have to pay a reconnection fee. Run my credit, I'm good for it.

Jackson the mail. Jackson the mail, turn it back on, please. I remember I've been there. I one time begged the gas company to please turn it back on. I'll pay the rest later. And it was winter and they did. To be fair to Georgia natural gas, they were very nice and they did come turn it back on. And then I got to turn it off the very next month

because I didn't pay him the other half. It was because I didn't want to, it's because I didn't have it. One third of it, you'd pay yourself as the only staff member in the company. The other third, you'd be using for software or for any bills you have with regards to actually running the company itself.

And then the last, you also pay yourself as the owner of the business, and that would be the profit. Essentially living off of two-six of the gross revenue that comes in. Now this is exactly how banks, investors, and other partners are going to want to see that you've run your business. I mean, so...

I know that banks wanna see this whiteboard. They going to love all the complicated writing on this whiteboard. As a matter of fact, that's an investment deck right there. Don't worry about putting a fancy PowerPoint together. Take a picture of... Take it to the bank. Take a picture. Boom. This is my strategy of Adam's artificially straightened cock and the whiteboard and say boom, did it already

did it. I'll come to see you my CTO, the CTO, the CGO, the CIO, the CIA, the CTO, the CTO, the CTO, the CIO, the CTO, the CTO, the CTO, the CTO, the CTO, the CTO, the CTO, the CTO, the CTO, the Chief Revenue Officer, the Chief Revenue Officer. All right, boy, you want't meet in vest in your business. Yes, Mr. Royal Takoon, I do. All right, let me take a look at your financials here. Well, I see here that you're only spending 22.6% on marketing.

And you've never taken gross profit off the top of 16.7%. It's in the bank. I think this is irresponsible. If I ran my whole company like this, I'd be a goner. But sir, I'm a million dollars positive cash flow. A million dollars positive cash flow? How long do you expect to last? And then you want me to invest money in this positive cash flow business, you're

insane. Get out of my office. Sorry, Mr. Bulbas oil tycoon. No offense taken. Let me tell you, let me turn you on to something. Back what you're wearing to a shirt like Adam. Come back when you dick get straight. He just straightened your dick out. Come back when your web flows directly in front of your penis. I don't trust a man who limps to his left. You know what I'm saying? I carry my dick straight. The only way I can see that happen is because it's very small.

Get out of my office. Many business owners who I help set themselves up for mergers and acquisitions and growth and scale, the aren't structured correctly. So when they do meet somebody who potentially could partner with them to help them grow, or they meet somebody to help them bring on investments to help the company get where they wanna be,

but they're not structured in a way that anybody can actually help them, because there is no bucket put aside to manage these costs or organize these staff or to make sure that there is a profit level available. Now even if you're telling us to take all the profit every single dime and put it somewhere else, how are we ever supposed to get a profit level of anything when 100% of the money is going out the door? This is a dumb way to work out of business.

Maybe a slightly bigger company. Maybe you've got three, four, five, maybe even 12 employees. And then a slightly bigger company and you're not watching this video. No. I don't have a damn penny to my name and I'm never taking this advice.

I know enough to not take any of this advice. And I'm not particularly good at business. I'm a business person that's not particularly good at business. I'm a business person, that's not particularly good at business. Still seen time and time again, that people don't have all the correct heads of the company in the right place. Any major corporation is gonna have something called a C-suite.

Now your C-suite or the corporate suite are a number of people, typically six people, and each one of them will be in charge of a different department. The C-suite breaks down as far as- Wait, you're gonna be a solo printer. A solo printer is what he's talking about. You're gonna be a solo printer

with six C level executives that you're paying out of the 16.67% net revenue that you would like to distribute to your staff. Yes. You know, it's just CFO costs. And an brion, brion, brion. Don't, don't just CFO costs. And an bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a-bri-a- Seven eight businesses. Yeah. Bread and butter everywhere. Literally butter for everybody. Bread and bread for everybody. I wish butter.

Good stuff. Hey, I'd like to thank you for showing up to the first C-suite meeting of the commercial break. What's that blue? Okay, settle down. You'll get your button bread and butter later. All right, will the champ has our CEO. Okay, Maryanne, you're the CSO, the chief service officer,

whatever that is. And guys, I don't want you to worry about payment. Pretty soon, web flows are going to be coming in from everywhere. Yeah, just just hold on. Chrissy's working on web flows right now with her good friend from Hotel Impossible. What's her name? Jessica? Jessica, Chrissy, are working on web flows all the time. SEOs and big web flows. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Your chief executive officer who's in charge of vision and of course,

driving the company forward, you've got the COO who's your chief organizing operational chief operations officer who's going to handle organizing everybody in the project planning. Next up, you've got the COO who's your chief organizing operational chief operations officer who's gonna handle organizing everybody in the project planning. Next up, you've got the CMO, which is your chief march. You just started a company. You surely can hire all of these people. Yes, this is exactly how you start a business. You look to hire the executives first.

Yes, hire the executives first and spend any money you've got on advertising to marketing. Yes. It'll just, I mean, I don't know why 500,000 companies fail. I don't know why 500,000 with advice like this, we should all be succeeding. Hi, Brian, it's Debbie down on the widget floor. We're trying to make widgets, but it seems no one has showed up to work. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's all part of the grand plan. You see, I took all the money I was supposed to be paying the people who make the widgets,

and I got a C-suite. Oh, what? A C-suite. You now report to the CTSO, the Chief Technologies Sex Officer. But what about the widgets if we can't fulfill the orders how are you gonna make money? I don't want you to worry about that. Adam's got us all lined up. We got a C sweet It's got them all like all kind of web flows Web what web flows you're not going that times Judy

This is why you're not this. Yes, any of the eight C This is why you got you got looked over for the CM00 position. It's because you don't have vision, Debbie. I'm just wondering how we're gonna complete these two orders we have. If no one's here to make the widgets. Fuck the widgets, it's all about web flows and C-sweets. Literally bread and butter, Debbie, bread and butter.

Okay, I quit. Look. I don't need you anyway. I gotta C-sweets. Literally bread and butter, Debbie, bread and butter. Okay, I quit. I don't need you anyway. I gotta C-sweets. Go out and get a couple of, you know, six more jobs. All you need. Debbie, it's your problem. All you need. Instead of cackling down there on the factory floor,

once you get to making us more bread and butter companies, I don't know, make a name up. We'll literally have global consultants. Yeah, global consultants, investment, incorporated LLC. You're no longer a widget maker, Debbie. You're now the CEO of WCWTW Incorporated Inc. And what do we do?

I don't know, web flows. Get us C sweet and report back to me when you're making money. That's a Chuseum gum, bubble gum and gigs, man. That's right. Chuseum bubble gum, gigs, and that's our vision. I literally put it all over the walls. Officer, that's going to be branding new product development and bringing in leads.

The Chief Sales Officer who's going to be in charge of it. Oh my god, I'm already so bored. Oh, I can't handle it anymore. I mean, it's so ridiculous. It's he does has no clue what he's talking about. I know, and I'm sorry, if you're in a position to have eight C-suite, people, you're not watching a YouTube video on how to run a company. No!

You made it! Any, yeah, you made it. You made it. If you found, yeah, you made it! If you found this video, you made it! You're not one of the 500 that's gonna fail. If you're stressed out about how to pay the bills next month, I'm about to solve your problem. Web flows and CEOs.

Oh yeah, baby! CMO, CTO, CFO, C-A. They all end with an O? C-G-O. C-Z-O. First and foremost, don't worry about making money. You gotta get a C-suite. Install the immediate first. How are you gonna get investments if you don't have a C-suite? How is Mark Cuban gonna invest in you unless you have a C-suite?

You think anybody on Shark Tank has a C-suite? No! They don't! And those people become wildly successful, mainly because of the sharks, but you get what I'm saying. I totally understand. All right, listen, everyone's settled down. Adam's got his own thing going on, whatever, to each throw out. I don't know how he makes money doing this,

but to each throw. He's web flowing. He's web flows. It's all about the web flows. It's being a web flow. It's all wearing a web flow. All wearing a web flow. It's being a web flow.

Go to our web flow, tzbpodcast.com. That's where you can find all the audio and all the video. The entire catalog is right there on the website. You can also get your Whatwood Frankie Do sticker. They're now available. Go to the contact us page. Give us your physical address and who it should be of dress to. Write a nice little note.

And then Astrid will send it off to you. And if you want us to sign it, more people requesting signatures. With somebody requested blues. Someone requested blues to autograph. And I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna put the Paul and Inc. And I'm gonna get that autograph for her. No doubt, I'll get it to you, I promise.

855-TCB-8383-1855-TCB-8383. You can text us toll free from anywhere in the world. The questions, comments, concerns, content ideas, web flows, we're taking it all in. TCB8383. Also, please do a subfavor. Go to youtube.com slash the commercial break subscribe to the youtube channel. You're doing us a huge favor and we'd love you to see the videos that we're making.

Add the commercial break on Instagram. TCB podcast on TikTok and again, please go to youtube.com slash the commercial break and subscribe to that channel. Okay, Chrissy, it's been a long day, so I guess that's all I can do. I think so. But I will tell you that I love you. I love you. And best of you.

Best of you. And also best of you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I always say, we do say and we must say. Good bye. Good bye. And I always say we do say and we must say good bye The Dark Being of the Cinnamon Assels you