The Commercial Break - Casper The Horny Ghost!

Episode Date: March 23, 2022

Spring has sprung, the flowers are in bloom and Bryan is interested in sports again. It's the best time in sporting and as a sporting expert, Bryan should know. Then more reviews for the show are rolling in and more TCB fans prove themselves to be funnier than the actual hosts. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles were an awful version of children's entertainment. Proving once again....the 80's were boring for kids and adults! Finally, Bryan finds comfort in life oddities, friends with the outsiders and interests in the absurds...However, Ghost Sex is not something he can take one bit seriously! An interview with woman having a TON of Ghost Sex is reviewed. LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us or leaving a voicemail at: 1.855.TCB.8383 Lululemon.com is for people who like comfort! Watch Us on YouTube Creator: Bryan Green Co-Host: Bryan Green Co-Host: Krissy Hoadley Written By: Bryan Green Exec Producers: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Content Production & Research: Tina Khano YouTube Producer & Editor: Morgan Please Audio Editing: Christina A. Executive Director: Astrid B. Associate Producer: Gustavo Episodic Contribution: Marianne, Diane, Natalie, Will The Champ, Will D** Huge Thanks To Our Supportive Listeners, Friends, Family & Spouses: Astrid & Jeff!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What is going on you guys? Man I'm roast beef here and this is like a weird I don't know I don't know what you're thinking you saw the title you're kind of horny No, but for real I had I got fucked by a ghost last night Um, the supernatural is never something that I like to fuck with but You know last night I got fucked by a ghost and I'm gonna keep saying it until I I got fucked by a ghost. On this episode of the commercial break. I guess every year I never get it right.

I mean, I'm just so bad at it. Because the only time that I ever watch college basketball is March Madness. And then I'm like the world's foremost expert on college basketball. Exhausted here to win. Going suck all the way. I don't know, it's a cool name. That'd be snorkel back everybody. Yes, happy snorkel cock to our listeners out there who are writing these amazing reviews.

I mean, I have been cracking up. Yeah, these guys, yeah, now we talk about this every fucking episode. I love it, keep them coming. I'm coming. Five stars, you guys suck. Boom. You guys suck unfunny boring and obnoxious.

Five stars, I'm a fan. Most powerful. And even when it came up behind you, you could see it. You could see it. I couldn't even out laugh. I could you not laugh. You could not.

You could even come behind. Even when it came from behind. Even when you got a ghost car riding between your bum cheeks. The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Oh yes, ma'am, yes sir. Welcome to another episode of the commercial break. I am Brian Green. This is Kristen, Hodley and Bestie, you, Kristen. Bestie, you, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I'm not a sports guy, right? I'm not gonna use words sports ball because I know it's way overplayed,

but I'm not necessarily a sports guy. I don't watch a lot of sports except for golf, which we always watch the masters together here. The masters, all the big tournaments, I like it. Something about seven hours of boredom, that really makes me happy. I think it actually started when I was like, in my mid-20s or early 30s,

I mean, my dad always watched golf. Yeah, my grandparents always watched golf, and I remember that kind of always being on. Yeah. And so I like to, it's soothing. It's soothing, yeah. That's right, it's something there's something very methodical and slow about it.

We used to take naps in front of the TV when my dad was watching golf, that's, you know, everyone take it after afternoon nap around the golf. Uh-huh. And then as I got into my 20s or early 30s, I, my dad was cleaning out his garage. He had like this old 70s golf club set, right? And he was like, here, you've won, I want it. And I was like, yeah, you know, I've been watching a lot of golf lately. I think I can pick it up. Yeah. I think I'm like, that's why I was out in the backyard. I would be on my carpet, like chippin' balls and puttin' balls. I would be on my carpet, like chippin' balls

and puttin' balls. I would be in my apartment when you knew me. I didn't chippin' balls into the wall. I mean, it was just like, and all the sudden, it got me like, I was so fascinated by, I wanted to see every tournament, I wanted to see every swing. I was so interested in this fucking boring sport.

When they make these great shots, it's so fun. It's so much fun. And it's so amazing. Yeah, it's amazing. To take a ball in inch wide and with a club three inches while swing at it at a hundred miles per hour, however fast they're going and then fly it up in the air with an inches of the whole. Exactly. Really? It's physics and strategy and power and muscle and memory and it's all about the mind.

You got one swing thought out of your head. Now, I've played a lot of golf and I'm not good at all. I'm just like a terrible, terrible golfer. I'm really good at putt putt. Yeah, putt putt, I'm okay. Yeah, because I know how to actually putt putt. Yeah, that's right. We putt actually put it around

That's right Four of us we were the place of the mom Drunken fork off on a Tuesday we should have been at the office. We were playing butt But oh Irresponsible terribly irresponsible. Oh, it was a client. Yeah, it was a client meeting with four sales people and no clients. But this is that time of year when I like sports. It's March Madness. March Madness.

It's the beginning of baseball and then you have the big golf tournaments. You got the Arnold Palmer, the players is now this time of year, which it hasn't been before, but this time of year. And then you have, of course, the masters coming up right around the corner. And it's just, I just love it. I just think this is, I'm okay with it. It's spring outside.

I'm okay having a little sports on. Things are blooming. It's beautiful outside. So what better time to be stuck in your house watching six hours of men hitting small balls into smaller holes? This is the one time of year I feel manly. I feel like a sports guy.

I'm like, I'm into it. I like the March Madness have no fucking clue who these themes are. I guess every year. I never get it right. Yeah, I never get it right. I mean, I'm just so bad at it because the only time that I ever watch college basketball is March Madness.

Yes. Right. And then I'm like the world's foremost expert on college basketball. Exhaevier to win. Going suck all the way. I tell you know, it's a cool name. I think they've won before. I'm like, Duke, I always big Duke took all the way. It's big.

And Kansas. Yeah. That one year they did. Then Coach K took them and it was a big story, right? And I always remember being fascinated by that story of, you know, those five guys, and I can't remember not one fucking name on that team, but Coach K was the, and this is Coach K's last year, too. Oh, really? So yeah, they even got to be in the tournament, right? I don't know. I don't know. Give me a bracket sheet. Yeah. I haven't watched golf. Like, when you have kids, golf

is not a sport you at all allowed to watch, because the first of all, the kids don't want to watch it. Second of all, it's fucking Mickey Mouse Clubhouse 24 hours a day. Third of all, you don't have the time. There's no time to watch golf. Lies really napping on the couch with a beer. How wonderful. Naps were. I mean, just after night, you used to just stroll into the bedroom just instinctively

around two or two or 15. Till three or three 15 or sometimes four or 15. Right. I don't know, whatever time we woke up. Now, if we get a five minute, if we get a five minute interruption from the normal screaming yelling and carrying on going here, that's like a damn.

That is an app, the happy day. Yeah, it's the Brian time. Yeah, so there's no more golf. So the other day, my little brother Patrick comes over, we're watching the players and I don't recognize not one fucking name on the leaderboard. Yeah, there used to be a time when I could I I knew I knew it what the world's called ranking was of every single player on the tournament now I don't even know any of the names of fresh crop that means I'm getting known and that means I'm way out of touch So go go and Zaga

And I hope Tiger Woods wins the master. I'm going to go in here. I don't know. Did we get the car accident under some shit? I did. Oh, yeah. It's a little suspicious to me. Why are you driving 110 miles per hour down a curvy road? Yeah, he was, yeah, he was, he was late.

Yeah, I, I think Tiger, I mean mean I'm just making a total assumption here, but I think Tiger might be a little fatalistic and I don't mean suicidal, I mean fatalistic. I think that's a good chance. Yeah, you know, he like wanted to join the Navy Seals at one point he went through Navy Seal training at the top of his career. Yeah, like back in, I think it was 2002, 2003 when his dad passed away, he went and he wanted to go be a Navy SEAL. Wow. So Navy SEAL training. I missed that.

And it was like to everybody else, this was absolutely insane. You are the best golfer in the world. You are on track to be the best golfer that ever lived. And you're gonna go do one of the hardest things physically that any man or woman has ever done, which is SE seal training. And 92% of those people did drop out like in five days, right?

And Tiger went and did it. I think Tiger has lived such an extraordinarily strange life that none of us have ever lived that things like running around Las Vegas sleeping with Everstripper that comes his way is it's exciting to him in a way that we don't understand. It's like, you know, we go sleeping with Everstripper that comes his way is it's exciting to him in a way that we don't understand. It's like, you know, we go, I don't know. Because the planning, yeah, we go zip lining and all of a sudden our world shanning, right?

Tigers winning the Masters with one hand tied behind his back. He wins the, you know, the championships with a broken leg. This guy's a fucking superhero and everybody adores him and he's rich as God and he is God to a lot of people. He's on the cover of everything you've ever had ever. Now after the accident, after the whole thing with this white, you know, Eelyn run in after it with him, a golf club and good for her, she should have. But after all of that drama, he's like a fallen angel. I mean, he just like fell to earth and then everybody hated him.

And then he, remember when he had to make that incredibly awkward speech in front of everybody? Yes. Like every news channel in the world covered it. Yes. And he was like, I am a Buddhist. I have walked away from my Buddhist ways.

Thank you. Yeah, it's very robotic. Get him fern? Attack fern. Get him a attack fern. He was so weird. Like his mom was there and his dad was there. And I think I can't remember maybe Eland was there.

Maybe she wasn't. But there were like all these Peele's, there's like 12 people in the crowd. And two cameras. And he just walked out. He's all sweaty. And he said he's a Buddhist than he left. Then he's all, you know, doped up on paint goes.

I mean, the guy, his guy is fucking human. He is, he is. Part of me. And then he comes back over and over again. It comes back from this. He comes back from that. He comes back. He wins tournaments.

He wins the fucking masters a couple of years ago, unbelievably, at his age, win the master's win a story. What is sorry? I think Tiger realizes that he's not long for the game. Like he's not going to be the best and he's not going to be Tiger Woods for, he may not ever be Tiger Woods again after the broken leg. Maybe not.

He may not ever competitively play golf. Might win a tournament here or there, but he's not gonna be, you know, 10 winning five to seven tournaments a year. And I think that he does has no idea how to handle that. He has no idea how to handle the thought of it because he's never lived in any other way, except being Tiger Woods,

the all powerful, all knowing I'll sing Tiger Woods. I don't claim to know what the guy's going through. I actually feel sorry for him a little bit, but, you know, I have a little advice for Tiger. Okay, I'm sure he's listening. Get back to Vegas. Get on that pussy bandwagon. Hit it and quit it, bud. Get back there.

One last turn around the tournaments, right? Let's see. One more masters. Let's get a couple more, you know, I don't know the TPC classic or whatever They call the John Deere, you know, a hobo classic. Let's get a couple of those under your belt and then just go out and style just One like one big orgy that you film you put put it on PornHub, you say, and at the end of it, you're like, I retire from golf. It's just leave the sport. There we go, my drop. Yeah, my drop, go and hiding, like Elvis did. That's just, that's my advice.

Yeah. So Elvis did a grocery store the other day. Nice. He's as fat as he's ever been. He's buying peanut butter and bananas. Look at that guy, snorkelcock. That's snorkelcock. Happy snorkelcock he's a liar. He's buying peanut butter and bananas. Look at that guy. Snorkelcock. Happy Snorkelcock to be a Christian.

Happy Snorkelcock. Happy Snorkelcock everybody. Yes, happy Snorkelcock to our listeners out there who are writing these amazing reviews. I mean, I have been cracking up. Yeah, these guys, yeah, now we talking about this every fucking episode. I love it, keep them coming.

I like them coming. Five stars, you guys suck. Boom. You guys coming. I like him coming. Five stars. You guys suck. Boom. You guys suck unfunny boring and obnoxious. Five stars. I'm a fan. Someone wrote that.

It was like, wow. People are really, you know, they don't think you have the chance. Very winning. Yeah. We're not in the tiger. People don't look at us like the tiger was a podcast. I was listening to it. I was on a Tiger was a podcast. I was listening to it. I was on a show on another show.

And I'm with a, like there's like five or six other guys. It's like a live streaming show that turns into a podcast, lovely, lovely, lovely show called Crossing the Streams. And there's a couple of other guys there that are podcasters, like in the film and television universe, but comedy too. There were like comedians that do the film and television universe, but comedy too, there were like comedians

that do this film and television thing. So at the end of it, the host of the show, Jeff Daweskin, says, everybody, you know, hey, okay, thanks for coming Brian, you know, telling where they can find you. Thanks for coming whoever, telling where they can find it. You know, you know, you know, it goes right, we're wrapping up the show.

And this guy makes this remark in passing, he's like, he goes, well, you can find us here, you can find us there, you know, we're top 50 podcasts in the world. You know, thanks for having me. And I was like, whoa, holy shit, you're a top 50 podcast in the world. Wow. Let's say a word, right? But I know that this is an incredible accomplishment.

Yes. There are 400,000 podcasts at any given time. Yeah. And to be in the top 50 means you have millions and millions and millions of downloads every single month. Mm-hmm. And so show ends, you know, and then we're all still online like on the Zoom phone call.

And I said, oh, that's crazy, dude. You're a top 50 podcast in the world. Well, in film and TV. And I'm like, oh, okay, that's crazy dude, you're a top 50 podcast and they were well in film and TV. And I'm like, oh, okay, that's still pretty good. Like congratulations to that, which, which chart, because there's a number of different charts, Apple and Chartable and a couple of other, listening notes and some other place.

So I said, which chart are you top 50 on? Mine. This one, because I'm on good pods. I was like, good pods. Good pods is an application where you might be listening to us. I don't know, but it's an application that just started and there's like 200 people on the entire platform. And they have this algorithm where if you listen to a show once, you run up to the top of

the chart. It's real quick. Any chart is a good chart. I'm not lacking the guy. I was gonna say, yeah, take it where you can get it. You can always manipulate the data. Yeah, but I know. He's like, it's a lot chart. I'm not going to say, yeah, take it where you can get it. You can always manipulate the data. I know. He's like, top 50. Yeah, you just conveniently omitted that with some rinky dink podcast application. I'm sure we're top 50 on good

pods too. I'm sure of it. You know why? We need to check that. Just later on today, I'm going to go listen to my own episode. I'm going to run up to number three real quick. That's a really wackin', podcasting is really wacky dude. I gotta be honest with you. It is, the Wild West, they're there. There's no universal way of understanding who's on top or who's on bottom, so it's just these random charts.

The Apple charts are kind of a standard. Chartable, yeah, it's kind of good too. Every time we get a review review we run up the Apple charts Right and then down so we can get a lot of reviews lately, but man are they smart at oh man are they smart? Sorry One of our fans reached through the good pods app and turned me off But man are they smart as they are I love it. I absolutely love it. Keep them coming it makes us laugh Hey, I want to see this too Amanda, they smart as well. They are. I love it. Absolutely. I love it. Keep them coming.

It makes us laugh. Hey, I want to see this too, while we're talking about what we're just kind of being met about the podcast. So a couple of weeks ago, when this whole Ukraine thing started, I mentioned that I was noticing some traffic still coming from Kiev and Odessa and the old blast region in a couple of other places. And we're not talking about a lot. My guess is 10 or less people, but they're still downloading from that location,

or that's what our analytics tell us. When I said that a couple times, we had someone that reached out to us and said, yes, I am in need. You said, yeah, that's amazing. And they did it in their native tongue. So why they translated it? And then I wrote back and I translated it, you know, in Google translate, back to her because I don't know if you're crazy. I barely know English. Thank God for Google translate. You think God for Google translate. And she just basically said, yeah, it's like a genocide here, right? Yeah, it's awful.

And so then a couple of days ago, a week ago, I wrote back again, and I just said, hey, just checking in because I noticed that the downloads were still happening from where she said she was located. And I never heard back. So I'm just shouting out, like if you're there, you were thinking about you and we're with you and what a fucking nightmare. Really is.

So snorkelcock. So how about teenage mutant interter? Teenage mutant, Ninja to dos, Teenage mutant, Ninja to dos, he was in a half shell, turtle power, half shell.

What a weird, weird, was a Michael Angelo Picasso. Leonardo. There was some kind of nuclear waste that had gone dotted to the sewers and changed them into heroes. Into heroes in a half-shell ninja. What a fucking weird I mean like gummy bears, care bears. What a fucking weird, I mean, like gummy bears, care bears, what trippy weird bullshit somebody was coming up with.

I know, I wish I had done it. And teenage me and Ninja Turtles, I mean, I had swag, you had swag, I got a bunch of. Yeah, they got a one spot or something. I think so too, yeah, and what a cool cat I thought I was. Look right there, here it was in a half shell. Turtle power. It's like turtle power

Turtle power really I like it they would wear those being Dana. Yeah, what's up? Kawa Bunga How a Bunga Anyone who grew up in the 80s is just lame. It's better than our brains to be lame Kawa Bunga-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee- CalabungiDee. Quote, Bart Simpson. Yeah, but then they made a movie out of it. That movie was just bad, bad, bad. Yeah, I think they tried to resurrect it, really. They did, they made a more recent one,

which I also think was bad, bad, bad. I think the problem with the first one is it's really without high-tech CGI. Yeah. It's really hard to recreate a turtling hero in a half shell. It's like these foam costumes where the mouths are just going like, you know, open and close, open and close. It's bad.

It was so bad. We didn't want to have Jamie Kennedy in it or something. Maybe. I don't know. We should do a deep dive on that. Yeah, we should do a deep dive on that. We should do a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle show. We should.

Just one show about Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. If you're interested in, if you have any, if you have any facts or information or you in fact are still a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle fan, it is up at tcvpodcast.com for 616-1237-8296. Okay. We talked about snorkelcock. Yes. Snorkelcock of course is the episode where we We I Trying to tell He didn't get it. I couldn't even explain I like it's this guy. He likes to have sex with mermaids and he's banging mermaid It's a mermaid orgy three mermaids and a guy and he's cleaning their Aquarium like that. Yeah

Their tits come flying out bounce on his face and he gets a hard on and then he realizes as she's going down on him that he can actually breathe underwater. And so I said so can she she's got a snorkel cock in her mouth instead of shooting just shoots air. So we did this whole thing about people that have fantasies around creatures, aliens, monsters. There's all holes. Having sex with them, yes. There's a whole segment of literature. Very well written by a reminder. I'm not sure it's in the library of Congress, but I don't know. Could be well written by a three-year-old. There was so many misspellings in it was hard to read because he was misspelling and misplacing words everywhere. Right. Like when he said his face turned read R-E-A-D, he meant red. And then what was the other one? I don't know. He was whipping him.

He was whipping the sweat off of his face. W-H-I-P-P-I-N-G, which is like a basic grammar, right? I think anyway. But listen, you don't have to be a genius to write what you want to write. No, exactly. We got the point. I did.

I got the point and so did the mermaids. They got the snorkel cock. So we did this whole episode about this and I just wanted to dive a little deeper into this whole phenomenon because I don't get it. I don't understand that for me. I mean, I don't care. You want to fuck a dragon, fuck a dragon. I don't know what it is. I don't know the physics of that are, but you know, you got a dragon cock in your ass. I'm not sure. Actually, speaking of that, I found Hentai where there was Dragon porn, where the dragon, the, a guy, a Japanese superhero type guy,

took a big rod, and he was trying to kill a dragon, so he stuck the rod in the, the female dragon's ass, and then she started to like it. And so he was like sliding it in and out of her ass. Man, people get really good up with it. And it was horribly graphic. I'm gonna cry.

And he was, and you know, that bad Chinese overdub, oh, I had so much pleasure. Oh, oh, oh, oh, that's bad. That's bad, it's bad. But I think that's part of the allure of Hentai. Is that it's bad and you know it's bad. It's campy and you know it's campy, right? So as I dove a little deeper after our, our, I still have like, by the way, like five passages I could read, but let's get

dig into something fresh. As I found, I just can't even believe this. I found so many videos of people who believe they have had sex with ghosts. One woman claims to have been gang banged by 300 separate ghosts while she was sleeping. Really? She called it rape. But again. How do you hold a counter? Yeah.

Which, I mean, what is a ghost cocky? Can you even feel it? I mean, I don't know. It's like it'll be wispy. I can't have, you know, a thrill. It's a thrill. Yeah. Well, when a ghost is, you know, three-year-old. Yeah.

Well, when he's, when a ghost is eating you out, this is what you feel. Right. It's like ASMR ghost porn. But I found a couple of videos of a lady in particular who has decided after her ghost sex that she in fact wants to get married and have a boyfriend, a ghost boyfriend. Do you want to hear more about this? Let's turn on the full reaction TCB shot.

Hold on one second. Hey TCB family, it's me and it's time for the commercial break inside of the commercial break. Chrissy and I are looking for a couple of guys, a couple of girls, a couple of whatever's to come on air and play a dating game with us. If you're a swing and single or your partner allows you to do this type of thing, please let us know. 661-237-8296.

That's 661, the word best, the number two, and the word Y-O-Y-O. Let us know you're interested in playing our dating game, and we'll reach out and set it up. www.tcbpodcast.com is where you go. You can find out more about Chrissy and I. All of the audio and all of the video of every episode is right there at tcbpodcast.com. A one-stop shop, if you will. You can also connect with us on our socials at the Commercial Break on Instagram where

we create content you can't find anywhere else, and YouTube.com slash the commercial break where we also create clips of the show every single day of the week and content you will not find anywhere else like TCB in the studio where we take a topic and we opine for 5-10 minutes. And if there's anything that you probably want more of it's my voice. Please use our sponsors specialized URLs and codes. If you're ever in the market for their products and services, it helps us out by letting our sponsors know we're doing our job. And thank you so much to all of you who have left

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Let's hear her out. Let's hear her out. I don't wanna be a make a snap judgment here. I wanna make sure that we here at TCB are giving everybody an opportunity to tell their story, their side of the story. And this one is about ghosts. Sucks.

Sucks. Sucks. Sucks. Only the British, Ghosts. Sex. Hahaha. Hahaha. Hahaha. Hmm. Only the only the British who have 15 channels called BBC. Hahaha. The morning show and every channel. By the way, she we're going to watch her basically not tell the same story but the same

story continued. Yeah. At two different morning shows. Oh. On BBC. They were really covering it. Yes, they were. This was all the rage breaking news. That's right.

Oh, I TV. I'm sorry. I did you first encounter a spirit. I've been about 12 years ago now. It's living with my fiance. Yeah. And he was. When did you first feel the ghost cock inside you?

Let's get right to the point. When exactly was the wispy cock? Enter you. Yeah, it was when she was with her fiance. When I was with my fiance. And I was dreaming about another man, something that looks like a ghost, anything. When I literally said in my own head,

I'd rather have a dead man laying on top of me. And this. I like it because of the spirit. The spirit? Not exactly the Jack Daniels into your life. How much spirits did you have before you met the spirit? Would you like a nip I've got some behind the couch? He's moved into a new house in Heriford. And after a while he was going away maybe one week, two weeks at a time.

He was sleeping with my sister once, twice a week, but then it turned into a regular thing. Yeah, I went, lululululululululul, go. So I just feel kind of like a presence maybe. I guess you could call it around the house. Yeah, which is something that's... This is a morning show. I know. I guess I sat up.

I mean, these two are serious. This is ITV. This is a very famous morning show, by the way. There's a lot of clips on the internet. I mean, when you go over to the UK or to Ireland or you can even catch this in Spain sometimes, when you, this morning show is like the legit, this is a good morning America.

Right, no, it's the guys, the girl, the guy that's all decked out. They're on the teams, I assume. That's what that is, the Thins. And they're asking the hard-hitting questions of a woman who had sex with the ghost. They're getting to the bottom of the egg. Literally.

And what did it feel like? A long, shafty thing with a bone to the head. You've been a little scared of, but you weren't scared by it. It never felt scary. It felt comforting if anything. And even when it even when it's all happens. Only the British can do this in a way that actually looks and sounds respectful. Yeah. I kind of felt comforting, you know. Like I did. She claims to have

had 15 ghost lovers. 15, that's what it said. Yeah, that's what it said. 15 ghost lovers 15 that's what it said yeah, that's what it said 15 ghost lovers. She's a ghost hoe She's a ghost. I'm a little snorkel dog. It's a little gout. It's a ghost. Yeah, sure Sure, why not who's making up the rules? Who exactly makes up the rules on that shit anyway? The British oh the British Splunk. There is certainly out're certainly the foremost experts on ghost dick. Most powerful. Even when it came up behind you, and you could see it. You're laughing.

I couldn't, they not laugh. I could, you not laugh. You didn't get me, you didn't get me behind you. Even when it came from behind. Even when you got a ghost car riding between your bum cheeks. No, it was comforting. It was comforting. Yeah. I was used to it by that time.

I had 15 different lovers running around the house. Couldn't see any of them. At any moment I could get a ghost car riding my mouth. I just felt them. I literally was at dinner party sometimes. Oh, oh, oh, oh. I carried around a board and I would ride on it. Sorry, got a ghost cock in my mouth.

It's kind of not being rude, it's a ghost cock. I've got ghost chees in my eye. Oh, sorry. Got to get to the bathroom and wipe it off. Your neck, that still didn't freak you out. Not a tough neck. So then you decided freak you out. Not tough, next. So then you decided that you would take it to the next level and you dressed in a very sexy negligent.

Oh, my God, she's dressing in the sexy, so pretty in the English. Oh, a negligent. Come for the ghost. Here, Casper. No, no, get me. What do you think of this? What do you think of? I don't know. I don't have eyeballs, you dumb bitch. I've been dead for 150 years. I don't know what

anything feels like. I'm not physically real. He went into the spare bedroom and and thermal lights off and waited. Oh, yes. I'm waiting. I'm waiting. She was respectful enough to go to the spare bedroom. You know, you don't have sex with your husband. You're not a sexist. That's a real bastard. Now I have to.

You've got to fuck a ghost. Do it. That's true. That's fair. Ah. Ah. Yeah, that's just probably grossy.

Don't get ghost jizz all over the. I don't want to smell a ghost sex in my bedroom. Doing the kids room. They don't know about such things yet. Turn the lights off.

Yeah. I'm I can't open the door. I don't have a hand. Just go through it. I can't open the door, I don't have a hand. Just go through it. I can't do that either, it's all TV bullshit. You'd be surprised how much stuff they got wrong about ghosts. I waited and waited for a while and then I got a little bit worried I thought maybe I'd scared it off by being too keen.

I was just as I'd given up hope from a start and fall sleep, it came to me and happened. And what happened? Like you don't know. Like you can't imagine what's gonna come out of her mouth next. Oh dear, what happened? I waited for a very long time. I farted and then I took a dumpy-do and went back to bed. What happened? He entered me. I wonder what all of his ghosts might. It's something I can say on Wait, you had sex. Yeah, I had sex with the girls the details girl

Build the tea woman don't leave us what we have sex I know there's a man and a woman on this host on this show by the way And the woman is using her hands to emulate the motion of making love and the man It's so fascinated. I didn't know you could fuck ghosts. This happens in the whole other world. I know what that is. I've missed out on the co-old I am. I've missed 30 years of ghosts sex. They shit.

Ghost? No. So how physically, how does the sex bit happen? You can still feel it. Like, it felt like it was difficult to explain. Like a weight. Kind of a weight, but at the same time, weightless. And like a physical, it was a weightless weight, but without, but the pounds were zero. It's kind of like when you step on a scale. Weightless. On the moon. You know what I mean? It's wait, but waitless. He penetrates you without actually getting inside of you.

And you can wrap your hands around him, but they go right through him. It's sensational. It's hard to describe. It's really hard to describe. But if you know you now, this is ridiculous. Oh my God. Breath and stroking.

And the energy as well. I think the energy was a lot to do with it. Do you feel a connection? And does a sexual experience with a ghost end in orgasm? And for me? I don't know about him. I don't know about him, but I'm getting off right good. It's just orgasm, I feel orgasm. Anytime wind blows on my clitoris, I go,

cuckoo. Oh my God. For me, I don't want to make assumptions about anybody else. And they are ghostly, sex life. They're going to dig that up. Wow, fans of the ghost. I just hope so. And this relationship carried on for some time and eventually you got busted by a boyfriend.

That is. I knew it! You scoundrel! I knew there was ghost dick. News of this guy. I saw you scotse condoms in the trash can. Oh, and the world does the boyfriend bastard. You kid smell the ghost stick right on a mouth, Houdley. It's a sh- you brought shame to this family.

We have children, my love. Why don't we go in to tell them? Sorry, mommies and love with 15 separate ghosts. You couldn't even pick one you Hussie. How long has this ghost took been going? Where is he? Where is he? I'll cut him up with a knife.

I was telling you, you're a second ghost. Oh, he's dead. Damn it. There's no justice in this situation whatsoever. No, you're going to go off with a new ghost boyfriend and you're going to go have to live with him and a heart and out out. Yeah, I was, um, he came home from work a day early. Oh, apparently he says he saw a shape of a man through the sparing window when he pulled up, which is unusual because the the spirit had an all ghost that never showed him his physical form to you at all. And yet he he sure did, the boyfriend.

He's like, look. Hey buddy. I can do it. Now he's see me, now he does. Make America great again. What's up buddy? Oh my god. He was a fat American, I can imagine.

He did, yeah. I wish I was a ready. Ha ha ha ha. You did. Yeah. I wish I was slightly annoyed about it, to be honest, but I think it was in love with me too. And that was the one to tell you to enjoy it. Yeah, it's what you did. So this relationship with this particular spirit fizzled out over a period of time. And I'm sort of so intrigued to figure out

what it is that goes wrong in a relationship with it. Go. The communication was really difficult with him if I'm just being honest We'd get into an argument and he'd hide under my children's bed making noises scaring them He was just kind of an asshole from being honest. He ghosted me being honest. He ghosted me. Okay, you can't blame me. I waited 15 minutes to use that joke. Okay. I waited 15 minutes. I don't want to hear any shit. I don't want to review. Brian's jokes are dad-like. Because you can't have the normal arguments like you haven't put the bins out or your conversation is boring or you know I don't like the way you wear your hair and all of those sort of things.

So was it just down to normal? What kind of arguments are you having? You didn't put the bins out. That's trash. I know what it means. But I was just like- Yeah, I've been in a way you're hair. Of all the things that after a night I've had arguments about it's not about it. It takes out that trash. Or how we eat her hair. What was the other one? I don't know. But you both got bored with the sex. So I think it was just one of those things.

It just started to happen less and less and started to appear less. And after that relationship ended, I mean, there have been many other spirits. There was a whole portal over there. We got it. We're here. Come on through the portal.

Author English. Come on over. Teleport yourselves over. There is this red head. She is fantastic. She's 100% bought in. She buys all the bullshit. Rattling chains all nine yards.

Go ahead over there. Get yourself some. Lovely lady, lovely. You have been, and some have lasted sort of one time, but some have lasted a little bit longer. Do they, are they very different sort of relationships? Have they got different energies? Yeah, you can always feel the difference.

The same just with a human, I guess. You can just feel different presences. So it's not the same one coming. Nope, nope, nope. Not like with a human, I guess. You can just feel different presences. So it's not the same one, come on. Nope, nope, nope. Not like with a human. Humans have faces. We can tell the difference. We can talk to each other.

I have like a human. Well, I can pick up physical objects. I mean, I love it. She's having them one night, stay in the team. Do you think maybe she was just black out drunk? Yeah. I think this has something to do with Iowa. It's a spirit. Spirits. I think this has to do with that crazy cocaine that's going around

filled with you know, let's don't or whatever they're doing. I mean, she looks like a lovely. She does. She seems completely normal, but clearly she's not. I mean, I don't know. Maybe they're, you know, and what are they, what's happening? Are they just like showing up all of a sudden? Like, let's have sex? Well, no, she's, she's getting ready for them. She's putting on negligence.

She's like, she says she feels the presence and she got ready with the negligence. I don't get it. I don't get it with that turned sexual. If I had a presence in my house, I'd burn the place down. I'd call ghost busters. I'd get the ectomobile over here, whatever it is.

Get some ectoplasm. I love it on some larger. Let me tell you something. I will tell you this, and I haven't shared this with a whole lot of people about to share it with a whole lot of people. One night, Rafael spent the night in my house and when I lived in the apartment.

And I had been experiencing for probably about two years, not often, but every once in a blue moon. And I would, this had nothing to do with alcohol or drugs, nothing. I was experiencing sleep paralysis. Oh yeah. And it was scary as fucking shit when it happened. But it was only happening for what I could imagine.

I don't know, was a minute or two at a time. Yeah, I've had that before too. A lot of people have, right? But then one night, Raphael was over and I started having the sleep paralysis and consciously became aware that I was having sleep paralysis. Right. It's scary. And I thought I was having a heart attack. And I tried to reach over to grab my phone for whatever reason to call my mom in my brain. I had to call my mom so she could come over or call 911 because I was having a hard time. Scary, scary stuff, right?

Yeah. I really believe this was happening. I didn't understand what was going on. Right. And then I lifted out of the bed, not lifted, not like physically lifted, levitated, like spirit, whatever, because my vision was now lifted off the bed. And as I was lifting off the bed, I looked into the corner of the room and I swear on all this holy, there's a little a dark shadow type creature. Yeah. And he's waving his hands like this, like back and forth, back and forth. Not now, not now, not now. And that's what he said to me over and over again.

And then I went back down and then I woke up and I gasped for air as if I had been underwater for an hour Geez, oh my god scariest shit. I have ever experienced in my life And that didn't make you want to reach out and have sex. No, no It didn't make me want to have anything to do with any of that shit. I was like, okay cool, right? I'm good on this plane. Yeah, right? I don't want to have anything to do with any of that shit. I was like, okay, cool. I'm good on this plane, right? I don't want to be an alternate universe or whatever happens. And sleep paralysis is a physical thing that does happen. It's the, you're asleep.

You're stuck in between the sleep and awake and you are consciously aware. Yeah, you're trying to get up and get up, but you can't. And some people even open their eyes and they can't move. And I don't know if I had my eyes open or close. I'm not sure. I don't know. I'm not, open or close. I'm not sure. I don't know. I'm not, I'm not, I don't want to exaggerate anymore.

I just want to tell the actual facts the way that I saw them. But I woke Rafi up that moment and was scared, shitless. And I was like, hey dude, this is what just happened to me. And his reaction to it was, yep, you, you have, you got, you got something, right? Paying attention to you

in another universe and he just stopped you from going wherever you were going. Whether that was you were going to visit somewhere or you were going somewhere permanently. Thank you, creature. Thank you, little black blob in the corner of my room. I really appreciate it. And then he gave me a blowjob.

Yeah, right. And I gave him a reach around the completion. Ha, ha, ha, ha. Stories gave him a reach around the completion. Stories true. Not to hear, Jack. Alright, let's get back to Twinkletoos over here. At 20 times. No, it's often different ones.

And you say, because since you're first, you've actually encountered with a spirit, you haven't had human contact in that way since. Once you go, go, you never go back. Once you go, go, everybody else's noops. That's all I got to say. Noops.

Not doing it, got a ghost dick at home. He's actually right here, he's following me around. He's literally got his dick in my ass right now. What did you just walk around with, like a hole in her trousers? He's actually right here, he's following me around. He's literally got his dick in my ass right now. What does he just walk around with like a hole in her trousers? Ma'am, you have a hole in your tides. I know, it's for the ghost dick. For the ghost. I'll go back.

Pretty much. That right. It is, yes. I would never, I've got no interest in men though. But what about children? Well, I'm sure. Well, it's tricky. It's a little complicated. Actually, do have children, you just can't see them. They're here on the couch with me. This one's been dead for years.

I don't know, I've done actually a bit of research into phantom pregnancies recently, which I know signs predict. Phantasy doesn't mean you have a phantom. It doesn't but actually there's cases of people who have done bit of research and there's... I'm trying to figure out how to explain my bullshit. I'm trying to figure out a deeper level of bullshit that I can explain to you but I don't really have too many facts. What's a bit of research. A bit of research. I googled it.

Yes. I've watched the Mori Povas special on Phantom pregnancies, and I know that sometimes women who have Phantom pregnancies are actually, I don't actually don't know anything. It's hard to explain. Let me look over this way, and then let me look over that way. And now I'll come back to you to tell you that. I really don't know.

I mean, there are sort of possibilities that could actually be maybe the ghost of Charmony, but people don't know how to carry it onto full-time kind of thing. Oh, thank you. How far are you, dear? Ah! Oh! 125 years. I can't believe that these two respectable TVOs had this.

Well, I mean, I think they are very respected. I guess it's hard to come up with content, and that is why we are reviewing this. We know this. Just like they had to go this low, we had to go this low. Listen, if we could have Morgan Freeman on to talk about the meaning of life, we would, but it's not happening. Okay, Jack Shepard. Oh, amethyst, that's her name.

Yeah, she's figured out how to give it to Fulterm. And exactly what happens when you give birth? Is it just like a big fart? Yeah, but let her continue to tell us. Oh, would you like to become pregnant with eggs? Yeah, at some point, not now. I mean, that would be quite a unique thing to see. Like a ghost.

A ghost, maybe. And I said, um, uh, you're like, curious. Can we have the first interview of the ghost, baby? Quite a unique thing to see. She just, like, filled up with gas for nine months and then went to go have the babies and... I had my ghost child, did you see? Where did it go?

Oh my god. Little Mikey! Little Mikey's junior! I'm having a 50 year old heart attack victim. It's my first child. Oh my god. Maybe. Hopefully not.

Do you want to, because we've actually believed this post yet. Because we don't. Just to be clear. Meanwhile, there's probably little bitties in the UK right now who are like, I can't believe she had sex with a ghost. How do I get that? Sometimes, here. And ask what he thought, because he always likes to put the argument against these sorts of things. And then he said that what might be happening to you could be,

it could be mental illness. I've explained this mental illness. By sleep paralysis, which is just in those early moments of sleep, where you're a conscious, but your subconscious takes over, and many people describe sexual feelings that happen, that it could be that. Could that be a possibility or... I don't think so, because my first... Oh, I don't know. ...the lingerie on. Oh, I don't know.

I actually put lingerie on. I was wide awake, wide open. I felt a breeze through a flow through me like I've never felt before. It was as if a hurricane wind went right into my chute jar. His name was Bob. On the end, so I was definitely awake while I was walking around. I'm in, so I was definitely awake while I was walking around. Does the sex part of it always happen in the same room? No. So once my fiancee left, it could be anywhere. Is it outside the house? It's always within the building.

So is the house, do you think? I mean, obviously, here as well, they find you attractive. I should have liked it. I'd like to interact. They don't give a shit. They're dead. Something's better than nothing. Well, if I was the host of the show, there's no way I could play along with this. I would treat it exactly as I'm treating it right now.

I would literally be like, you keep going and we're going to laugh over here. That's all right with you. You've got quite a name for yourself in a spirit way. For the future, no need for... The future is looking bright. I got plenty of ghosts. I got plenty of ghosts. To people die every day. It's a matter of fact, if I want to get my fiance back, I'm just going to kill him.

I'm sure her physical goes. The human kind, you are happy now, this is for you the way you want to do. It is, yeah. I'd like to find one that I would like to settle down, maybe, and spend my rest of my life with. What? What are you fucking talking about? You're looney-to-ooney-to-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o- He just gives you orgasms. Maybe you're just having phantom orgasms. Maybe you're just one of those ladies who just walks around and gets an orgasm. It's happened. It's a thing.

I'll never go back to my mind. Waiting for Mr. Wright. Thank you very much indeed. Absolutely fascinating. We discuss all sorts of things on here. I think this one's a first. We discuss all sorts of bullshit on here. This is clearly more bullshit than usual. Oh wow. I just love it. I mean, I just love these wackadoodle stories. I can't get enough of them.

I don't know. Yeah. Yeah. Oh my gosh. One for the book. That's one for the road. There you go. All right, so I have a part shoot to this.

There is, she talks more in depth about how she has found a lover. This is like a cup, I guess it's some time down the road. She found the man. She found the man. She left her fiance. She now has a boyfriend, a ghost boyfriend. And if you want to dig into that, we can dig into that on another episode in the future. We'll do that.

Wow, Chrissy, what another fantastic, fun-filled, fact-filled. Goescock, snorkelcock, dragoncock, we cover it all here. Instead of dragoncom, it's dragoncock. Just remember that. Okay, tcbpodcast.com, that's where you go. You find out more about Chrissy. All the video, all the audio. It's right there in one location, tcbpodcast.com.

That's also where you can get a hold of us, hit the contact me button, send us an email on over. If you wanna be a part of the summer games, the tcb summer games, that include dating games, trivia games, games about stupidity, games about the tcb, your tcb knowledge. Tcb trivia. Tcb trivia, I got one of those coming up too.

Yeah. We have a bunch of games we'll be playing over the summer Let us know two three six six one two three seven eight two nine six six six one best the number two Y. Oh, yo just text me Let me know you're interested in playing the games and we'll get you on the schedule at the commercial break on Instagram and YouTube dot com slash the commercial break for content you cannot find anywhere else and clips of the show every day of the week, most days of the week. Sometimes we take a day off but we put out at least six clips a week and you're going to love it. If you're going to hurry

and you just want to hear something funny go and get your five or seven minutes of the commercial break on youtube.com slash the commercial break breaks subscribe and like on your favorite videos comment and review you know all that stuff. Thank you to all those who have left us reviews on Apple any podcast player will do right review send us a screenshot we'll send you a tcb clip a sticker we don't get a lot of that we got the stickers we get the reviews but no one wants the sticker yeah if you want the sticker it's free I'll send it to you. I paid the postage. I own the sticker. I'll send it right to you. Then it's your sticker. Chrissy, I think that's all we can do today. I think we've done enough.

I love you. I love you too. And the best to you. Best to you. The best to you out there in the podcast universe, remember. If you're gonna go snorkel cocking, bring your oxygen. Until next time we always say, we do say and we must say. Bye! I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say you