The Commercial Break - Excel At Just Getting By!

Episode Date: January 3, 2023

Some people are good at "falling upward"! Some people are great at "falling down". And some people are just trying to excel at getting by! Bryan and Krissy admit to as much on this Ask TCB episode of TCB. It's time fro the gang to answer your questions. The Aliens are gone Does Bryan run the show by consensus?? No. Goal Goal Goal Goal Goal The notebook, meant to help TCB remember has been forgotten I Am Shaunna Rae Ask TCB A listener writes in with a dilemma around a loved ones co-worker Linda Sue is worries about being rusty Bryan has a strange self love moment with someone other then himself Bryan gets scared by liberation Two men try to get over a "size" problem Someone wants a sister wife! TCB reacts LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us or leaving a voicemail at: 1.855.TCB.8383 Lululemon.com is for people who like comfort! Watch Us on YouTube Creator: Bryan Green Co-Host: Bryan Green Co-Host: Krissy Hoadley Written By: Bryan Green Exec Producers: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Content Production & Research: Tina Khano YouTube Producer & Editor: Morgan Please Audio Editing: Christina A. Executive Director: Astrid B. Associate Producer: Gustavo Episodic Contribution: Marianne, Diane, Natalie, Will The Champ, Will D** Huge Thanks To Our Supportive Listeners, Friends, Family & Spouses: Astrid & Jeff!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I guess after you get two wives, guys, you're like, ahhhh! And then a third of the row comes along and they actually say, if you're having problems, and like when you have two wives, when you're having problems, marry a third, because they'll even it out.

So I only ever wanted to be a third. I never wanted to be a first, at all, because I didn't want to be married to a guy by myself. And then I didn't want to be a second, because I felt like they were a little wedge in the relationship and I didn't want to be the wedge. I felt like they were a little wedge in the relationship. I don't want to be the wedge. I only ever want to be third because it sounded easiest. On this episode of the Commercial Break,

there's one thing I want to give to my son, it's my knowledge that just getting by is perfectly okay. Don't have to excel at anything. Hey Brian, come out here and drink a beer and smoke a cigarette with us. Nope, protecting the pile of cocaine. Tasting it every few minutes to make sure that it's okay for everybody else. I mean, I think back... How many people have actually liked it?

People have dated me, actually liked me. I know of one. And it's wearing thin with her. I got rabbit head so clean now. Start stroking that shab! Grow a leg and jizz on me! The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Go go go go go go go go go go go go go!

Yeah, cats and kids, welcome back to, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, 15 seconds did you notice the slight change at the beginning of the episode? I did. I did. No more aliens. No more. We can't do it anymore. We're driving people to drive their cars off the road. One lady in particular was like, you can you please stop playing the dying cat noise at the beginning of the episode? It drives me crazy. And I'm like, it's not a dying cat, it's, well I won't even do it, it's gonna annoy her. It comes specifically from a show that we did. And episode, yeah.

But if you didn't listen to that particular episode in those six seconds of that particular episode, you have no fucking clue what we're doing. And I do have to admit, it's getting a little grating, even for me, I have to listen to the show, unfortunately I have to listen to my fourth spec, at least three times after every episode, and it is obnoxious, for real.

But, less do you think that I'm just countering to one person who's complaining, I've had many complaints about it, so I'm just... Well, yeah, and I had somebody that say, they couldn't understand what was being said. What was being said? Yeah, fair enough. So, we're gonna move on from aliens, I've got some other stuff lined up for season four now back to go go go go go go go go go go go it's goal No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no I don't know the whole time it was yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo I'm like, we got to start. We need that notebook. I'm fucking notebook. Did you bring the notebook? I did not. It's further away now. Why isn't it here?

We're talking about the notebook that Chrissy has promised. Remind me about the notebook and I will bring it tomorrow. This is how the commercial break really is at planning episodes. Chrissy, seven episodes ago was like, we need a notebook so we can write down all the stuff we promised to do so we don't forget it anymore. Yet Chrissy can't even remember to bring the notebook where we remember things It's so bad so bad

I had a notebook in the car one day even and I didn't I should have just left it here You should you showed it. This is why the commercial break. It's destined for mediocrity That's where we're gonna stay I mean a forever we're trying, we actually have a, like, a writer's room coming up. Yeah, we do. But if we don't write anything down, we won't remember that either.

Okay, I'll definitely bring it for the writer's room tomorrow. You definitely gotta bring it. Yeah, tomorrow. Tomorrow, which is yesterday, for a lot of people who are listening to this. Let me ask you a question. Okay. I know the answer to this,

because I think it's true of everybody. Have you ever embellished on a resume or a job application? You know, just got to take it a little extra. Sure, I mean, maybe not, and I've never lied about where I've worked. No, I know. I know these, the things, the responsibility.

Yeah, I've never lied about directly where I work. But I might have made up some titles and stuff like that. Sure. Like, the responsibility. Yeah, I've never lied about directly where I work, but I might have made up some titles and stuff like that. Like, you know, well, no, I think I'm director of market right now for directing operator of all things interactive. Yeah, terminus records. So what do you know what directed? The director of marketing.

For like, you know, the commercial break, the company, we have to set up like titles and ask her like, what is the title for this person? I'm like, think it fucking ever fucking care. Yeah, that's what it is. Put anything. And I certainly have put a lot of it. We're never getting any other kind of jobs.

No, it's the Chief Operating Officer of No Job Ever. Never again employed. Well, you know, we're not a political show and I don't want to make this about politics, but there's this guy, George Santos, and this whole thing is really fascinating me because regardless of what side of the aisle he's on, I just can't believe that we as a society have, I mean, embellishing on your resume is one thing.

Like maybe, you know, upping the title a little bit, right? You're the... Or you did some things that maybe you just did once. You're like the director of yeah, you're the director of marketing and then you put, you know, chief director of marketing or whatever. Because no one's ever gonna find that out. Right.

It doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of things. No one really fucking cares. But this guy, George Santos, it's like he lied about every single fucking thing on his resume and then ran for Congress. And then he got found out by everybody. And now there's a big question mark about whether or not he should go to Congress. In my personal opinion, I think, if he embellished a couple of job titles,

everybody does it. Like, don't be the guy who throws stones in a glass house. But when you lie about everything, up to and including where you're born, who your mother is, what schools who went to every single thing, whether or not you're born, who your mother is, you know, what schools you went to, every single thing, whether or not you're Jewish, he claimed to be Jewish, he's Catholic. He claimed his mom is from Ukraine, they're family heritage has been Brazilian

for 280 years. It's like, dude, you took it further. Remember that one time my buddy took it further at the further fest and he took all the drugs before the further fest. Before he went to the show. I feel like buddy took it further at the further fest and he took all the drugs before the further fest? Before he went to the show. I feel like Santos took it further. It's just insane to be, I mean, Santos doesn't sound like a very Ukrainian name in the first place. No, it sounds Brazilian.

It sounds Brazilian. Yeah. But I mean, I was just reading through a lot of stories and like advice columns. I looked up lying on resume and it seems like everybody in the world has done it. There are thousands and I mean tens of thousands of posts and I probably read through 50 of them of people explaining that they embellished on the resume. Some of them got caught doing it and I actually know someone in my personal life who claimed to have graduated from a rather prestigious university but did not even attend.

I've heard of that half a year. from a rather prestigious university, but did not even attend. I've heard of that. Half a year. Half a year. Yes. I think it's like your schooling. Yeah, your schooling, your education level, or which education, which, you know.

What's the reason for that? Yeah, which is the reason of how you're learning you went to, right? Now, if you went to like, to cab technical school and you claim to have gone to Harvard, right? That's a big lie.

Yes. If you went to university of Illinois and then you say you went to the state college of Illinois or whatever, I don't know. I think there's a little line right there. When you cross it, it just makes it a little too much. And what surprises me is that it's even a question about whether this guy should go to Congress. I don't care if it's Republican or Democrat, put another Republican in office.

Choose another Republican to go in office for whatever reason, make it fair. Yeah, that way the people's votes, the people who voted Republican, they don't get their votes squashed. But at the same time, should we be sending someone who has a real disconnected idea of what truth is? No, I don't think so. It's just fascinating to me, but apparently everyone has done this.

Everyone has lied on a resume. So it got me thinking, if everybody has lied on a resume, I wanna hear what the worst lie on a resume ever has been. So it's up to you and the TCB universe. We wanna hear what your worst resume lie was. Your embellishment, the embellishment you used to get employment, gain employment, or stay employed.

Get a raise or whatever it was. TCB 855 TCB 8383 855 TCB 8383. That's that. Are you embellishing our number? Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. Embellish my tongues and bellishing. TCB, you know the fucking number. TCBpodcast.com, go to the contact us page, write us season number four.

We need the notebook so we can remember this. I have a special episode that I have lined up and resume lies is part of that episode. Just wait until you're here. I think you're going to like it. We're going gonna need a notebook so that we can remember to actually do it. Notebook will make an appearance. If you've ever seen the notebook, the movie,

is it good? Oh, I love it. Why does so many people love that movie? I love it, it's so sweet. Is that what Ryan Reynolds, or not him, Ryan Philippi? No, it's Gosling. Ryan Gosling.

And what is the story about? Oh, I can't even explain it. Is it a love story? Does he die? No. He doesn't die. No, there's a double love story. Kind of.

Oh, it's like a polyamorous love story. No. Is it gang bang movie? No, it's a love story about when they were young and then when they're older, but you don't know the older couple is the younger couple until the end, and it's really sweet. It's kind of like that stupid show that was on TV for a while.

What was that? The show with the made of, this is us, everybody cry. Oh yeah, yeah. It's like where they had the present day and then the past and then the present day and then the past. I can't keep up with the show that asks me to do that much work.

It's just, that's why. We need to know that. That's why TLC is on my life. Yeah, the other day she was like, is there another fucking channel besides TLC that we can watch in this house? And I'm like, but it's another episode of I Am Sean Array. She's only three feet tall, she's 36 years old.

Come on, this woman's trying to live. I wouldn't be able to take it either. I Am Sean Array is like the number one new show on DLC. That matters to anybody I don't think it does. No. But that 90 day fiance is on 24 hours a day. They have 15 different versions of it. That's their hit show.

I almost can't keep up with it anymore and I'm kind of like, eh, whatever. But this new I am Sean Array, I told you about this girl. We did a show about her before. Yeah, that's right. This girl's like three feet tall and she looks like an 11 year old girl and she is 22 or 23 now.

And it's a really, I think it's a really interesting like societal question, like can a girl who looks 11 have a mature intimate relationship with a man who is clearly does not look like he's 11 years old and what are the motives behind that relationship? So it explores, it's exploring her love life in this season number two.

It's exploring her love life, and I can't help but feeling as a father. It's the heart of her. It's yeah, I'm fucking a man. The fuck do you know? There's not a, and I get it like, genre-ray deserves love just like everybody else. Yeah. I think the only way that's okay is if she actually went to school with someone and grew up

together. That's right. With the love grew in. Met another man who had a similar condition. Correct. Which she did, but she didn't like him. She wanted to go for the full grown, you know, balls in your mouth guy. Yeah.

She wanted a man's guess. He's from England. He seems like a very perfectly lovely human being that she's the guy that she's dating right now, but I have some real questions about his motives. Because if I go to a blind date, and in 11 year old shows up, right, I'm waiting for someone to put me in handcuffs.

First of all, second of all, I don't think I could get past it. I really don't. I would be like, this is just all, this is all of it is creepy. And you're a lovely human being Shana, but I gotta go. We can be friends, but I gotta go. Like I'm not gonna be a part of the relationship where we get intimate.

It's just like, it's mind-boggling actually. And I don't know why. She has like reverse aging, is that matter? She just never ages. She has some kind of, she had some kind of cancer. Okay. It hit her pituitary gland. Yeah.

It stopped all the hormones from growing. She just stopped growing altogether when she was like 11 years old. And she looks like an 11 year old. Besides some extra aging in the face, like maybe the smile lines and stuff, you would not be able to tell the difference between a 10 year old and her. And her parents have her so smothered, understandably. They're scared for everything. They're really helicopter parents.

They have smothered this girl to the point where she cannot exist outside of her home, basically, in my opinion, she just learned how to drive. She has no idea what, how to make ends meet. She doesn't live on her own. She's very childlike in her maturity level too, because her parents have not allowed her own life. Yeah. So she acts like a child. She sounds like a child. in her maturity level too, because her parents have not allowed her her own life.

So, she acts like a child. She sounds like a child. And she looks like a child. Well, can you imagine it, Matthias, just stayed the way he was. Oh my God, if it was nightmare, why? It would, why, why, why, why? It would be hard to let him out into the world. Why?

I'm sure what amount of, you do is online banking. hard to let him out into the world. Why? I'm sure about a, could do his online banking. Chrissy, I like, he's in this phase right now. He's such a smart human being. And I like to talk to my, my children a whole bunch, it descriptively, but he's such a, he met him.

He's such a smart human being. Like honestly, he might, he's probably smarter than I am. He's gifted in some kind of way. Yes. He's such a smart human being. Like honestly, he might, he's probably smarter than I am. He's gifted in some kind of way. He's so smart. And so therefore he wants to understand how everything picks. He wants to know the tick and the talk of everything. And I understand that every parent goes through this with Todd Lerz, or Todd Lerz, or Todd Lerz, the Y stage. But this kid takes it next fucking level. I'm sleeping the other night. I'm sleeping in a separate bed because Astrid's pregnant,

the two children want to crowd the bed, and I'm trying to give everybody a little bit of breathing so that there's some comfort for Astrid. So I'm sleeping in this single, like, you know, this bed, this made for children, and I'm sleeping in it. At the end of the bed! My lovely, you know,

comfort king, super soft, extra special mattress that I paid $12,000. It's still paying it off. I bought it 10 years ago. It's lovely. And I'm sleeping down at the end on a pullout bed. But Matthias, if he gets up in the middle of the night, he wants to come with daddy. So now it's him and I trying to fit on a bed that's clearly only made for him So last night, you know, it'll happen in the middle of the night But I'm just praying that it happens later and not sooner so I can get some kind of sleep right so it's two in the morning

I can hear him rustling and I'm like fuck here. He comes and then he crawls down to the end of the bed And he jumps in and I'm like, okay, but he's you know go wrap up lay down, you know, just go to sleep Why and I'm like why because it's nighttime dad? sleep. Why? And I'm like, why? Because it's nighttime. Dad, why is it nighttime? I'm like, because that's what happens. He goes, Dad, where did the light go? And I go, what light? And he goes to the light bulb.

And I'm like, what light bulb are you talking about? And he's like, the light bulb in the sky. I go, that's the sun. Why? Why what? Why do they call it the sun? I don't know, they call it the sun. Don't turn me in the morning!

Ha, ha, ha, ha morning! Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Put it in Chrissy's notebook and I'll answer it later. Oh, I forgot, Chrissy's notebook is nowhere to be found. Why dad? Because we're lazy, you'll understand it when you get older. You do just what you have to to get by. That's right.

And that's all. There's one thing I want to give to my son. It's my knowledge that just getting by is perfectly okay. Don't have to excel at anything. Commercial break is proof. That's right. But again, what if Mitty has never grew? If he never grew like from he never grew. Like from now, from right now. That would be disturbing. Right.

Yeah, that would be a hard to let out of the house and date grown women. If Mitya's was like, look like he does now, and acted like he does now. And then brought a 35 year old woman to the house. I'd probably go, thank God. Here's a keys to my car. Here's a keys to the apartment. He's gonna ask a lot of questions, but it's all good.

Don't worry about it. Good for you. Yeah, that would be disturbing and you're right. Maybe it's, I can't put myself in these parent shoes because I don't, I'm not living that existence. And I can only imagine after going through like a massive battle with cancer and your child is sick,

you know, there's a real like mama bear, papa bear instinct, anybody who has children or anybody who has a stepmother or stepfather to children understands that you grow this instinct to want to protect. Protect and do anything you can to make sure that they don't get hurt in any way and you hate to see them in any kind of pain. So I think thinking about this, like as a parent, these two parents are really just trying

to protect her from the worst of what society has to offer. They also... Because there's a bad people out there. There's a ton of bad people out there. And there are good people who do bad things. I was saying this the other night about a specific situation. It's all well-finding good until it's not.

And all it takes is the, the hot, loud, it's very hot. Very profound. It's usually from hot. So great until it's not Brian Green. Hey, hey, girl, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, where Moses said the came and able. It's all good, just not. So in preparation for the other shoe dropping, I thought you could send me some pussy picks.

Oh my god. Yeah, no grapefruit found. Thank you, girl. I got loads of them. Let me turn to page. Let me turn to page 44 my Bible. What was the one? What was the one I sent you earlier today because I was scrolling on Instagram. Oh yeah, I love those Instagram. And I came across a model who had, you know, thong pictures and, I mean, just total, total. Chrissy, I just wanted to let you know that I know you know about those.

If you put a piece of plastic over your boobs, it's technically not gonna be a good thing. Right. I just learned that because I read the terms of service. Well, master, master, right, it was a very profound statement. Oh, yeah. What did you say? What was it, girl telling? It was. It was hold on. Hold on. It's an detection. It's not. Oh, memories take us back.

Dreams take us forward. Here's my song. That's super. Here's my asshole. That's super book. Here's my asshole. I can show my tank still technically okay. You know, girl, I got my polished finger is on point. You know what I'm saying? So when those girls flipping flop around and just showing a little bit of chew cheek, I got my polished finger on. That's right, spring shot quick.

I got my polished finger on fleek. As a matter of fact, I think my pause finger on, fleek. As a matter of fact, I think I know the girl who wrote that. I think I wrote it for her. Here's another one. For either your musician friend who keeps talking to people in his reels or for your Instagram models, at all good, till it ain't. It's all good, till it's not. It's all good, till it ain't.

But like one stupid decision, you know, changes, everybody's like. It does. It's a butterfly effect. I have to believe that these parents are doing what's best, that they think what's best for their child, but it's clear now that she's older and desperately wants to have her own life. She has no clue how to do that because their parents have never given her that chance. Does she go to college? This is coming from the guy who still has all five of his children sleeping in the bed.

And I am now sleeping on a On a on a Yeah, yeah, we got a jail cot down at the bottom of the bed I'm just waiting next is gonna be a hammock strung from one side of the closet to the other Like the villages We'll talk about that in a few minutes. Okay, so Let's get to submit. So let's get to something actual. Okay.

There have been a ton of people that have been blowing up the phone line. And I'm so appreciative of it. I love it. I've been doing a lot of the responding. It's someone here always responds, but a lot of times I'll get on late at night, you know, high and drunk and waiting for Matthias

to come into the single bed, I'm sleeping at. And I'll respond. And I just love our listeners because I think they're great. And a lot of them will straight up tee up and ask TCB question. So we've done this from time to time. And I think we've done quite a bit in season three actually. We've gone to the questions. I don't like them to linger too long. But some I waited, I just kind of put them aside for a minute because they're sex-driven questions. They're like, sex-oriented advice questions. And I thought I'd put them all together.

And because we don't talk about sex a lot on this show. No, barely ever. Barely ever. I mean, if you go on that website that rates podcasts by the content, it puts a transcript of the podcast together. And then it will rate it. There's 35 different categories. Violence, guns, sex, drugs, and then when you talk about drugs,

it'll name the drugs that you're talking about. So cocaine, mushrooms, acid, LSD, all this other stuff. When you look at our line for sex, it is so far in the red it can't go any further, and there's of the 287 episodes that we've put together or whatever it is 265 of them have been marked red for sex I don't know how this became a sex show, but That's why I tell my mother-in-law please don't listen

No, no, thank god my parents my my father-in-law month Thank god my mom doesn't know how to use a podcast My dad got sick of it the second he started listening to it. And my other two in-laws don't understand English so good. So I thought we would do an Ask TCB The Sex Files edition. So without further ado, I was trolling on my cell phone. As you do. As I do like to do.

Hello, all my friends out there in the podcast universe. Thanks for listening to this episode of the commercial break. If you have any questions, comments, concerns, or content ideas, send them to 1-855-TCB-8383. Toll free from anywhere in the world, 855-TCB-8383. Make sure to visit our YouTube channel, youtube.com slash the commercial break. Full episodes air a few days after they do here on the audio feed and starting in season

4 the same day. You can go to the TCB podcast website at TCBpodcast.com. Here all the audio and watch all the video you can also contact us all from TCBpodcast.com. Please follow us at the commercial break on Instagram and feel free to use our specialized URLs and or codes when you hear them on the commercials. Speaking of those sponsors, let's take a moment here from them and we'll be back to this episode

of the commercial break. All right everybody, I gotta let you know about our wonderful sponsors, Lululemon. Last week, I stopped by the Lulule Lemon store to get myself a pair of joggers. You think Lulu Lemon is just for yoga pants? You are wrong, just like I was. Lulu Lemon can accommodate almost any piece of your wardrobe, and they do it in style and in comfort.

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Lululemon.com, and we want to thank Lululemon for becoming a sponsor of The Commercial Break. I've got a couple listeners to have questions. Do you want to answer? Let's go for it. Okay, the first one, I'm not going to name names here because unless they've given me express or written consent to do so, I am not going to name the names. I am in a monogamous relationship with a man, though I have also attracted to women. My man does not know this,

but I have dated at least four women in my life, and I quite enjoy that kind of sex. And this person is a woman. This person is a woman. Recently, my man has been hanging out with a new group of work friends, one of the women in the group, and I flirt every time we are together. Late last week, we had his company, Christmas party, and after and at the after party. The old Christmas party. And now she says that they went to the after after party. After the party is the after party That is where the real cocaine comes out. That is yeah, but you're just doing bumps in the bathroom

Just doing bumps in the bathroom until you get to the after after party and then there's usually a mirror somewhere And one guy that's just hanging out a little too much in front of the mirror. That would be Brian Hey, Brian come out here and drink a beer and smoke a cigarette with us. Nope, protecting the pile of cocaine. Tasting it every few minutes to make sure that it's okay for everybody else. Uh, late last week we had this company Christmas party and at the after-after party this woman offered me a bump and we went into the bathroom at his house. We took a bump and we immediately started to kiss and make out. I cut it off after a few minutes and we walked went into the bathroom at his house. We took a bump and we immediately started

to kiss and make out. I cut it off after a few minutes and we walked back into the party. My man was none the wiser, but this week the woman contacted me on my Instagram and wants to hang out alone with me soon. I am tempted to do this, but I don't want to hurt my man's feelings. We haven't been together that long. I don't see marriage or children in the future. What should I do? I was, that was when my question's how long have you been together? Yeah. Well, first and foremost, you should offer him a position in the situation. Exactly. That's what, that's the easiest thing to do. Exactly. I mean, what guy's going to turn you down? I wonder what, like, what capacity

the woman who works with him works with him. Do you know what I'm saying? Is it like a boss or a manager? Is it someone under him? Yeah, is it equal? That's an important question, and I'd love to hear that part of it.

But just with the information that we have so far, if you're into it, like offer him an opportunity to get into bed, because as we've said many times on the show, when it's a man and two women, the man will eventually fall out. It's just the thing. And probably not too long afterwards.

Five, six minutes. I mean, how long could the guy go? He's got two beautiful women stroking his cock. It's going to last for a few seconds. That's it. Don't worry about it. It might be awkward for him at the workplace is the thing. Might be, but yeah, you gotta be careful about workplace rules.

Yeah. Because, you know, if there's workplace rules that say that you cannot fraternize with other employees, then you have to lie about. So make sure that you got your story straight. Right. That's what I do. Take it advice for old Uncle Ryan. What's clearly didn't apply to radio sales back then?

No, didn't apply to a clear channel. Now, please, I one time went until the A-sharp director about something and she was like, and? Yeah. And I was like, scrolls to scrap my balls. And you didn't like it? And I'm like, what kind of, what kind of fortune 50 company are you running here? Yeah, clearly the flight sales advertising.

Yeah, you got to be mindful of all that workplace. But yeah, I mean, I think I would say, be honest with him. Yeah. And does he know that she knows women? No, he doesn't, she doesn't know that she likes women. He doesn't know that she dated women. Really? And he doesn't know that yet, he does what she said at the beginning.

She says, my man does not know this, but I have dated at least four women in my life. And I quite enjoy that type of sex. All right. Well, so she, there's not too much of a upfront honesty going. No, there's, yeah, there's zero communication going on in this relationship. So I would say, throw it in the trash. Yeah. Ghost him. You know what I would do? I'd wait till the next Christmas party and show up with her instead of him. That's what I would do.

That's how you get him talking. And don't worry about it, because you're not employed there, who gets a fuck. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, this is like this, you know, on all fronts. I'd hang out. Yeah, on all fronts, it sounds like you're not that interested in this guy.

Yes. Because if you were, and listen, you could be, I mean, I don't know from personal experience, but I know from talking to people and hearing from people here at TCB and my personal life, you could be attracted to men and women at the same time. Absolutely. But it doesn't sound like you're giving this guy any level of respect that's due a true relationship. I mean, come on.

You're making it out in the bathroom. You're doing bumps behind his back. You won't tell him the truth about how you've dated. I haven't even dated. You're hiding this relationship, this secret relationship. I mean, come on. You're making it out in the bathroom. You're doing bumps behind his back. You won't tell him the truth. You're hiding this relationship, the secret relationship. It sounds like you are not interested. And that's okay. Not everyone's gonna be a winner. You're gonna you're gonna date a lot of people and you're only gonna really like one or two of them. I mean that's the truth. I mean, I think back how many people have actually liked it? People have dated me actually liked me.

I know of one. It's wearing thin with her. So there you go. Yeah, I think this is, I think it's clear that you're not all that interested in the sky, but you are interested in the girl. And the girls, see where that goes. See where it goes. Send us pictures.

Yeah. That's on Instagram. On Instagram. Yeah, tag us on Instagram. Dcv5cast.com. Yeah, tag us on Instagram. Then that way, well, at least I've made one post in 2022. That's true. It's like, I got an idea for the first post back for season number four. I'm in the Instagram thing.

And I'm like, great. And she's like, well, we have to do is we have to find a street with built. And I'm like, already out. I'm out. I'm out. I'm out. What are you talking about? If it doesn't happen in this studio, and I can't write it down on this piece of paper,

I know how many pictures have I taken, I'm going, I'm gonna post that. Oh my God, Chrissy. Every of them runs a good moon. Chrissy starts taking pictures of like television, so it drives me crazy. I'm like, what are you doing? We're taking a show, she's out of post.

I'm sick of this. I was sick of this. I'm sick of this. Yeah, you don't. I forget about it. You don't write it down in the notebook, with's out of post. I was pissed. I was pissed. I forgot about it. I forget about it. You don't write it down in the notebook. I know. With the notebook, it's 52 miles away right now.

It's got, it was here in a car for a moment and then it got further away. I am taking out the notebook when I get back. Oh my gosh. You know what she should have just done when you had it in the car that one day? She should have brought it back in. I know. I just did. Okay.

TCB. I'm a 25 year old female living at home with my parents while I get my masters. I consider myself attractive. I've never had any trouble getting a lover or a date. I'm confident, I know what I want in love and in the bedroom. However, the pandemic has made me just a bit nervous. I feel out of practice.

While I really wanna get laid, I don't have the drive to overcome my fear of being a rusty lover. Any advice? Get back in the game. Oh girl, do I have some advice? Hey girl, I don't know what your name is. Let's call you Linda Sue.

Hey Linda Sue, it's me. And I know what it takes to get a rusty lover back in shape. It takes a little bit of horn grease. It takes a little bit of horn grease. It takes a little bit of horn grease. And I think you start off slow. You got to dip your toe back in what, dip your nipple back in the water. Here's how you do it. Send your photographs to 1-855-TCB-8383.

You got to first start with a phone sex and then you move on from there. You know what I'm saying, Chrissy? No, what you're saying? Like? I know what you're saying. I got a couple videos of you masturbating send them to me and I'll drop some cash off at your house. And then the next step is we meet in a park and make love while other people are photographing us and behind my wife's back. This is an easy one. In order to get in order to loosen you up from your rusty love. Yeah, you guys get a little bit. Get back in there. Here's the crazy loosen you up from your rusty love. Yeah, you're gonna get back in there.

Here's the crazy one. Get back in the game. Try it. If you're rusty, you're rusty, but you won't, you're gonna become more rusty. Yeah, you're gonna become more rusty. You're gonna become more rusty. Yeah, if you have no trouble getting a date or a lover and you really want to get laid, go get laid.

Yeah, I could get a practice. In the history of conversations about people getting laid. I've never met an attractive woman who might have a problem getting laid. Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah. In that sense, go to a bar with some of your friends, find a guy that you like and you trust, spend some time with them if you like them sleep with them. If you want to do it, sleep with them. And that way, you're not showing your rusty lover skills to anybody that you know or particularly care about it that way. That's what I was saying. Get a practice. Yeah. And by the way, everybody's been in. Yeah, everybody's been through the same thing. And honestly, you could just do

a little sexting back and forth with somebody. You know what I'm saying? Do a little sexting, little masturbation, little mutual masturbation. Don't say this story. About how I met this woman, Can I say this story? About how I met this woman, I was dating a girl, I met a woman through this girl. Like we all hung out a couple of times, right? It was a friend of this woman that I was dating. I broke up with the woman that I was dating and then this girl, let's call her, let's call her Linda Sue. Linda Sue started messaging me about five months later and she was like, oh hey, I saw

that you did this and I was really interested in what you thought about that and are you reading this book? This is back when I was sitting on the mountaintop with my Buddhist robes on, posting on Facebook every three days. Like, it's all good until it's not. When you change the way you look at things,

the things you look at start to change. Two Facebook likes. I was one of them. Chrissy was the other. So she started talking to me about all this stuff. We connected, she's living out in the desert somewhere in a trailer taking nude photographs. I'm not even sure what the girl was doing at the time. It was really weird. She started sending me nude photographs. I'm not even sure what the girl was doing at the time. It was really weird. She started sending me nude photographs at some point.

It went from zero to 100 in a minute. It was all about Eckartolle for like two weeks, and then it was all about her labia for the next year, right? Yeah, that was her end. Yeah. Was the, the, the Eckartolle. Spiritual. She went in with the heart, wants with the with the heart wants and she came out with my pussy

Needs to be crammed right? It was like it's crazy. Yeah, but I rolled with it because I was saying I read a mingle and who cared right and so she Starts sending me the sex messages and what I start noticing about the pictures that she's sending me is they're very artsy Right and but they're artsy, but they're graphic. And the more that I look at the photographs, the more I realize that it's almost impossible because at this time we didn't have phones that would have a timer on your phone. It was almost impossible for me to understand how exactly

she was taking these photographs by herself. Until one day she sent me a photograph and there was a dude in a mirror behind her. And he also had a half-hard. He was like stroking himself while he's taking the picture. So I knew I was in for a while, ride with this girl. Anyway, listen, we were just communicating. I wasn't getting all upset about the other guy. I didn't give a shit, right? Yeah. But then she insists on coming in town, coming in town, coming in town. And I was like, yeah, sure, come on in town. And she came in town and I happened to be somewhere else. I wasn't able to pick her up from the airport,

but I give her the address. I leave the door open to my old apartment. And when I come in the door, she is sitting on my couch, sans pants, zero pants, like vagina hanging out. And the second that she sees me, she stands up, she gives me a hug and she's like, I really wanna masturbate with you right now. And I was like, what do you mean?

And she was like, you wack off. I'm a big enough. Yeah, she was like, you wack off, I wack off, we do it together, I just wanna watch you, you watch me. And I was like, wow, this is really, yes, of course. Of course. Yes.

Exactly. Crack me a buttlight. How fast do you think you can do it? I can go pretty quick. You might be going a little longer than I will, but hey, whatever. And it looks like things worked out with that relationship. Yeah, things worked out great. As evidenced by the next 26 women that I dated.

I went right back to the other girl. I dated her first place. That girl was, I appreciated the confidence she had in her own sexuality. Yeah, of course. It was like my real first experience with a woman who was, who in my opinion was absolutely sexually separated. And there was something about that.

There was a little bit scary. Of course. Because I had never met a woman that I hadn't seen in six months and had never seen under any sexual premises. I walked in and there she is with her pants off, ready to whack it. And I was like, this is- Get a knife behind the back. This is scary.

And awesome. I know, that's what I was afraid of. I got rabbit head stew cooking. Now, start stroking that shaft. Grow a leg and jizz on me on my pets. Well, that was the other thing. It was like, you got to jizz on my tits. You got to jizz on my tits. And but she was like, there was something that was super sexy about it. Of course, the confidence.

Super scary about it, but I... Was new tarot. I loved it. I thought it was awesome. I loved it. And so... You're a U-Ryan. Yes.

So ever since then, I've just powered in the corner every time I have a sexual experience, waiting for someone liberated moment. Come and get me. Uh, yeah, listen, there's no other advice to give you, except you got to get back on the horse and ride literally and figuratively get back on that horse and ride. Okay, ready? Yes. Hi, Brian and hi, Princess Chris.

Oh, Princess. My boyfriend and I have been together for nine months. He's a top and I'm a taker. He is super cute right out of a banana republic ad and I am a super freak. I have more piercing holes on my body than actual holes my man has been inside on other bodies. Well, there you go. That's highly descriptive. But opposites attract in this situation and I love his sensitive little personality. He feels all the feels and he feels it for both of us. Anyway, gross. That sounds great. I got all sappy. One thing.

One thing has been getting in the way for us for sure and that's the sex. He has a great member and it's lovely and it's adorable. Anybody that calls my cock lovely and adorable is finding the way out the exit. Like if you walked in and were like, hey, you want to whack off with me? What a cute cock you have. That's therapy right there. That's therapy. Don't don't ever call someone else

that's being this adorable. He is a great member and it's lovely and it's adorable, but it's not very big. And I like it big, like this sized big. The bigger the better, I want to feel it and I'm going to feel it deep, but I just haven't had the balls to tell him that I need more. I bought an 8-inch dildo for us to play with and he got very defensive about it. I really wanted to buy the 12-inch actually. I just don't know how to cross this bridge. We listen to your show sometimes on Saturday mornings. Maybe you could tell him in your super funny way. We call him affectionately stew, take it away, TCB. Well, I was gonna say there's toys for that. Stew, he wants a big fat fucking cop.

Yeah, go for it, stew. And he's willing to look past the fact that that may not be attached to your body. He just needs some other appendage to help him get off. And I was gonna say anything wrong, no, this is two guys. Oh, oh yeah. This is two guys. He's a top,

cause it says right here, right? He refers to himself as a he and he says, he, uh, did, did, did, did, did, did, did. My boyfriend and I have been together for nine months. He is a top and I am a taker. Okay, okay, got it. Oh, yeah, just, I mean, come on Stu, get in the game. Yeah, Stu, get in the game buddy.

Sounds like you've got everything else going for you. Be open. Chrissy and I have lots of dildos here in the studio that we use for lots of different purposes. There's nothing to be afraid of. It's, you know, sometimes you need it small and sometimes you want it big. That's just the way it is.

Some people are made differently than others. And I don't, I don't think. Sounds like everything else is working. Yeah, in the relationship. They love each other. I mean, you may have a six month mark, I don't really. It sounds like everything else is working. Yeah, the relationship. They love each other. I mean, you men have a six month mark, which is a sign. Do you make it six months? And you guys are complete opposites.

He's like an amber convienn fish model, and the other guy is like, you know, something straight out of a, I don't know, Seattle's coffee house in 1993. Like, these two are meant to be together, because opposites would be to attract in a lot of ways. Very true. And there's one opposite that you cannot correct yourself because that's just the way

you were made. And that's okay. That is okay. Listen, join the Small Pena's Club. It's all right. Sometimes you need toys in the bedroom to help you out. There's nothing to be ashamed of though. There are.

Nope. And who knows? You may find it to be fun. Communication is key. Communication is key. So stew. Uh, you know, someone has a hole that needs filling and unfortunately you're not able to do it You got to find a way to get it in there have you I think I asked this question before have you ever

Not Jeff, but have you ever been with a man whose penis just was never gonna do it for you? Like it just for whatever reason, two small curved to the left, just it was like, that's not gonna do it for me. Sure. Yeah. So, I mean, what do you say? Like, what is there to say?

Yeah, yeah, you gotta talk about it. Yeah, to talk about it, or this is eventually gonna end in a bunch of frustration for everybody, right? I mean, I've actually heard that conversation before. I think that this openness of the communication comes with age, unfortunately, you know, back when you're young, you're so self-conscious, you know, and you're also self-conscious about maybe hurting someone else's feelings. It's true. But really, the truth is, if you just

talk about it and you both are on the same page, you can figure out a way to work through it. One thousand percent. Sex wise. That's actual good. If everything else is worth it. If everything else is good, sex is bad. That can be fixed. That can be fixed.

You just got to figure out how to tell each other what exactly you like. Yeah. Unless you're Irish Catholic and then you take a strict no talking and no coming position. Your pullout game better be strong. You don't have saying. no talking and no coming position. Your pullout game better be strong. You don't have saying? I think this is a relatively easy one to fix here. And I think you just got to...

So be open. Let's do. Be open. And because your man is, and he needs something else to fill that open list. He needs to fill the void with something and you're not doing it. And that shouldn't make you feel embarrassed. That should make you feel happy.

That your man is willing to work through your, not shortcomings, but your differences and how you like things. You know, six inches may be good for some, but it's not good for your boy. So just, you know, go get a big dildo and when you're done, get him off, I guess. Yeah, yeah.

Is that something like that? Sure. Reach around, whatever's going on in that bedroom, have fun. Okay, like that. Sure. Reach around, whatever's going on in that bedroom, have fun. Okay, one more before, one more and then I'll tell you what we're gonna do next. Are you ready? Yes.

B and K, how are you best to you? Well, best to you. Her name is Kelly. Hi, Kelly, how are you doing? How are you doing? From wherever you are. My name is... Oh, I weren't saying names you doing? From wherever you are. My name is... Oh, I weren't saying names.

She asked, she said, we can say her name. So that's why. Yeah, I actually corresponded with her. Yeah. I didn't even write the names down on this piece of paper unless they said it because I was like, I know. Good idea. Thank you very much.

My name is Kelly. I live in the Midwest. I love your show. I am 35 years old and I have two children and my husband wants a third. However, at 35 years old, I'm not sure that I want to go through another pregnancy and I have a more pressing issue that I feel we need to address. I want a sister wife. What in the fuck? Whoa. Is going on. I didn't expect that. I didn't expect that either.

And I've read this and I didn't expect it. I just remembered. I put these all together and I just remembered that this one was on there. Does she want a sister wife to have the third child? She wants a sister, I want a sister wife. I did not grow up around this type of polygmy. I have no idea. Polygamy. Polygmy. I have no... polygamy.

polygamy. I have no idea what it... what I say? poly... he said polygmy. polygamy. I did not grow up around palladiums. polygamy. polygamy. polygamy. polygamy.

polygamy. I did not grow up around polygamy. I have no idea about this lifestyle. The only thing that I know about sister wives is from television shows that I have seen. I have no idea about this lifestyle. The only thing that I know about sister wives is from television shows that I have seen. I have seen them too. And conversations with others online. How you find this to be very important for me to fulfill my life's purpose? Really? How do I convince my husband that this is the right thing to do because he has zero interest in finding a sister wife. Looking for your advice love. Kelly. Wow. This is the second time in TCB history that we have had

somebody that is looking for our advice and they are pro Sister wives. Do you remember this? Okay, there was like another girl who's sister who's best friend Metaguy and that guy wanted her to be a sister wife. Do you remember that? This was you know, you don't remember that okay if you had the notebook you could write it down. Oh sorry I was thinking about the question. Okay. Yeah Because don't do this. What are you fucking thinking? I'm just wondering.

I was just wondering the reasoning behind. She doesn't get into it here, right? She didn't get into all of the reason. But she says she's in that lifestyle then for her to want this, could maybe mean something more to do with the marriage because if she doesn't, she kind of wants to pass those. Yeah, I'll just look for a yield.

Seriously, maybe she doesn't believe in divorce and she's just ready to get her husband off of her back. Right. One of the two, but she says she needs it to fulfill her life's purpose. What is your life's purpose? Being fucking miserable and sharing a dick with another woman? Like, okay, if that's what you choose to do when you're single and ready to mingle, I get it.

Go for it, right? It's all about it. But you have two children and a husband, and your husband is saying, I do not wanna take on another wife. Now, it sounds to me like you're having problems in your marriage. I think so.

Because in our opinion, and I know this is not true of everybody, but let's say that 90% of the time, in our opinion and our experience, we've talked about this a lot on the show Polyamory is French for my relationships not working out That's what it is. I need something else. I'm bringing it in from here. I'm finding this girl over there I don't understand it. I don't get it and if you watch the same television shows

I want about sister wives. They are all diverse. I saw the thing in the news today about that with the woman, Christina. There's a memory she said, I'm not leaving the show, but we're getting divorced. Yeah, of course she's not leaving the show. It's our bread and butter. It's the way that she's gonna make money.

And listen, I have never watched that stupid show more than a couple of episodes here or there until this last season. When two of the five wives have decided to leave him, which I think is wonderful because I think the guy is a total fucking douche canoes. And he was never Cody. Cody. Anybody named Cody has issues. That's all I got to say. I don't know that to be true, but it just sounds like Cody sounds like one of those names. If you're Cody and you have sister-wise, you've got mental issues.

This guy's got a Jerry Curl 24 hours a day. He's literally permed his hair. Isn't he, doesn't he do multi-level marketing? He does, that's what he does. He's a multi-level marketing. He is such a bad polygamous that he got kicked out of the polygamous community in Salt Lake City. He can't go back! They hate him.

Why? Because he's showing all his shit on TV and he's miserable at it. He pays no attention to any of them, he makes love to none of them, and all he does is just skirt responsibilities and conversations and communications. This guy is living in the lap of fucking luxury for a long time, and now the women have had their comeuppance. They have decided, enough of fucking this for a long time and now the women have had their come up and they have decided enough of fucking this. We're done.

We're done. Yeah. I'm sick of you just showing up at whichever house you want to, whenever you want to. This is how, what a douche this guy is. There's a lady, they bought, they bought a piece of land or he said they bought a piece of land. I'm talking about sister wives that show until TLC. They get kicked out of Utah so then they go and buy a piece of land,

I think it's an Arizona, wherever the fuck it is, they buy this piece of land in Arizona, and they're all gonna build houses on this land. It's like a huge piece of land. Cody says, we don't need to live together as a family, so we're gonna build one big, 75,000 square foot house,

and you have this side of the house, and you have that side of the house, and all the women are like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, don't wanna live with her, don't wanna live with her. They don't even like each other. And so Cody says, okay, let side of the house, and all the women are like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, don't wanna live with her, don't wanna live with her. They don't even like each other. And so Cody says, okay, let's split the land and everyone can build their own house.

Well, it turns out Cody never bought the land. He just borrowed, he just borrowed it for a while. And he hasn't even paid it off yet. So there's a woman that's living in a fucking trailer because all she wants to do is live on this land. That's what was promised. That's what she wants to do. One of the wives, I forget her name. She wants to marry, I think is her name. She wants to live on this land. So she puts a fucking

trailer there with her daughter and she's living in a camper with her daughter. Now listen to this. Listen to this. She, Cody, can't live in the camper because it doesn't have enough hot water, it doesn't have a bedside table, the reading lamps, not in the camper because it doesn't have enough hot water It doesn't have a bedside table the reading lamps not in the right place The girl is like a four-year-old school girl He has to have everything in its place or he's inconvenienced Meanwhile this woman who you promised a house is living in a fucking camper out in the middle of God knows where So she gets an apartment like an apartment in the college town I think it's in Tucson or something. Okay, she gets an apartment, like an apartment in the college town. I think it's in Tucson or something.

Okay. She gets an apartment and it's just an apartment. It's just an apartment. It's not a great apartment. It's not a fancy apartment. It's a college apartment. It's what it is. It's got one bedroom, a small bathroom, and a kitchen

because she's listening to what he had to say. He didn't want to live in the camper. Well, he walks in and all he does. She's trying to move in and all he does is complain, where's my reading lamp gonna go? Where's my pants gonna go? Where am I gonna plug in my chargers? Where am I gonna sleep when I'm really dying? This guy is like a fucking, he's the worst of the worst. And now they're all getting divorced. And I'm not saying that's your husband Here young lady, but here's what I am saying Kelly

This never works out. Do you realize on those shows when they do that my sister wives or my next wife or whatever it is? Do you realize that they'd never have a season two with the same couples? You want to know why because they don't work fucking out. That's wow It's incredibly complicated to juggle an intimate relationship with just one person. If you're gonna do it with two, you gotta have fucking rocks in your socks. And Kelly, don't do this. You sound like a perfectly lovely person. You listen to the commercial break. Obviously you've got some problems. But you don't need another wife. You need either get a divorce or figure out what's wrong with the relationship

and fix it. Yeah, I want to address the a divorce or figure out what's wrong with your relationship and fix it. Yeah, I want to address the reasoning, but the life's purpose part is very... Life's purpose. Because if it's to religious, then maybe... But she said, I didn't grow up like that. I'm not in that religion. It's not a religion thing.

Well, yeah. It's totally confusing. You got to give us more color commentary on this, Kelly. First of all, second of all, I'm telling you, you're heading down a road of fucking misery. Complicated, right? Yeah. And now we've talked to people who have polyamorous relationships,

not sister, wife type, or relationship, but polyamorous relationships that are working out. Yeah. And so it does work. But you know what? They only see each other every once in a while. Right. For months. Oh, that's true.

It's not like they're traveling the way they go. Well, we do know there's other people that moved the person in. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Well. They're unique. that we do know there's other people that live they moved to the person and oh Yeah They're unique. Yeah, they're unique birds. Yeah, they're unique birds They also listen to the commercial break all y'all got scruzlers. That's all I got to say Chrissy and I the only sane ones in the commercial break universe

All right, everyone settle down ask tcb you you too can ask TCB anything you want to. Just ask us and we've had a couple questions like when are you going to stop doing the commercial break? I had a question that said when you guys can start being funny. I need your advice, I listen to a horrible podcast called the commercial break. When will they start being funny? You, you know, with success, come taters. Lincoln always hope. We've got 15 listeners now, at least most of them don't like us.

Eight of them don't like us, but we got seven that are on our side, Chrissy. Yeah, Kelly, I don't mean to be harsh, but I don't mean to be harsh on you, but something doesn't make sense here about this question. Yeah. So, write us back in. 1, 855, TCB8383, that's 1, 855, TCB8383, toll free from anywhere in the world. Questions, comments, concerns, content ideas. You can send them all via text message or you can call and leave a voice message if

you're brave. We might use your voice on air. Two things I want to remind you about. If you have lied or embellished on your resume, send us that. I want to hear that story. And if you'd like your 21 EPM sticker, they're going out right at the beginning of season number four, just send us a message with your address and your full name. And we'll send you that 21 EPM sticker coming up here in the next then in about a month. TCPpodcast.com, I promise this one is actually happening, you want to know why?

Because Astrid is doing it. Anything Astrid's doing is going to work out just fine. If it has to do with Chrissy and I forget about it. TCPpodcast.com hit the contact us button, you can do the same thing. Give us your address and your name, tell us you want a 21 EPM sticker, and we'll send it to you. Let's see how many of those we can get on the back of cars. I would love to be like taking a road trip somewhere and see a 21 EPM sticker. But you know 15 people out of the 300 million delivery are the United States. We'll see. Add the commercial break on Instagram and I just want to let you know

Chrissy and I are going to take a short break in January. We're gonna fill it with a couple of new live episodes and a couple of best of episodes narrated by some of the people behind the scenes here at the commercial break. So, say tuned, season number four, coming up the first week in February. Okay.

All right. YouTube.com slash the commercial bike, that one. That's all I can do today, Chrissy. I think so. I love you. I love you. Best of you. Best of you.

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