The Commercial Break - Frankie A.I.B.

Episode Date: December 29, 2023

Bryan is joined by Tina in this epsiode of TCB. They dicusss the very scary AI results for Frankie B, what this means for the future of TCB and how Frankie will adjust to life in the new world! Bryan ...recalls his DMT experinces. Plus Bryan get's a seggs toy and he is scared to use it!    LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us at: 1.626.ASK.TCB3 Call 626.ASK.TCB3 and leave us a voicemail Watch TCB on YouTube Creator: Bryan Green Co-Host: Bryan Green Guest Co-Host: Tina Khano Co-Host: Krissy Hoadley Bransford Executive Director: Astrid B Exec Producer: Bryan Green Producer & Audio Editor: Christina A. Content Production & Research: Marianne  Associate Producer: Gustavo

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 I want to brought from his happy holiday slumber over there. A melody lane with all the other rich people. I want to brought right here with a big ribbon on his head. And I want to look him straight in the eye. And I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no good, rotten, foreflushing, low-life snake-looking, dirt-eating, and bread over-stuff ignorant, blunt, fucking dog-kissing brainless, dickless, hopeless,
Starting point is 00:00:21 heartless, fat ass bug-eyed stiff-leg, and spotted-imp, it's funny, and we're in the head and sack of monkey shit he is. Hallelujah! Holy shit! Where's the title? On this episode of the commercial break. It came back with the most amazing explanation about Frankie B Then gave me the episodes to go listen to that Frankie B was in even when Frankie B was not in the show notes or the title
Starting point is 00:00:51 fucking That's crazy Intense I was like I wonder how Frankie B feels about this. I don't know. I don't I Don't Frankie. I know you're listening so Frankie go out there and Google yourself and see if what comes up Yeah, believe us a comment. Leave us a review, will you Frankie? The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Oh yeah, Kats again, welcome back to the commercial break.
Starting point is 00:01:19 I'm Ryan Green. This is the titular Titan of TCB. Tina, best of you, Tina. Best of you, Brian. That was a mouthful. It was. It was. Tina's sitting in the seat, Titan of TCB, Tina Bessio Tina. Bessio, Brian. That was a mouthful. It was. Tina's sitting in the seat while Chrissy takes some time off to be with Fomali, she'll be back in earnest in season number five.
Starting point is 00:01:35 Let's put it that way in January. So it's been a long slog for her for the last few months and we hope that Bessio, Bessio, Chrissy, hope everything's going well. Hey, speaking of TCB as the titular titan of TCB, I don't even know what Titular means, but it's a pretty word. I was listening to, I don't often listen to Joe Rogan for lots of different reasons. The first one being, I don't have the fucking time to sit through four hours of Joe. Yeah, these episodes are very long. Very long. Thank God we didn't choose to do that because I'm sure we would have no listeners.
Starting point is 00:02:06 I think 45 minutes to an hour is perfect. But I was listening to Rogan in the background because the click-bady title had me going and it was, AI didn't scare me until, or AI didn't scare him until he heard this. And here was the premise of the conversation. It was like two guys who were part of an organization that basically are trying to police what's going on in AI.
Starting point is 00:02:30 Or it's like one of those think tanks, right? Sure. So they've been watching this for a while since like 2014. And the one guy who seems like quite the expert on AI explains, and I am paraphrasing here obviously, because I don't, because don't trust anything you hear on the commercial break. But we're joking for that matter.
Starting point is 00:02:47 Yeah. He said that AI has been around for a while, and they have been, for a long time, for like 10 years, 15 years, they've been trying to teach these computers how to learn on their own, which is artificial intelligence. And ask it to go do a task,
Starting point is 00:03:01 and then it goes beyond that task to learn how to, learn language essentially, right? And learn how we explain AI is, AI is the advent of a computer trying to predict the next character in a word, or the next character that's going to be written on the internet, or the next character that's going to be written in a comment, or the next character that's going to be in a search. Right? So basically what it's trying to do is it's trying to figure out the next letter or character
Starting point is 00:03:29 that's predicting that. Right. What happened was in 2019, I believe, or 2019. If you don't trust anything you hear, by the way, go to your homework, I don't even know what the fuck I'm talking about. But I'm just paraphrasing what I heard, which is probably already twisted up in my mind,
Starting point is 00:03:44 even though I just listened to it 10 hours ago. But here's the, here's the, the gist of it. In 2000, in something recently, in the last three or four years, the people who were working on these programs started to add CPUs. They started to add computers and they asked it to go out and read everything on the internet,
Starting point is 00:04:02 everything that it could get its hands on in the internet. What they found is, in one of these CPUs and one of these nodes, they were, and this was like the scientist or the researcher found this by accident. They weren't even looking for this, but they found that one of the nodes was starting to figure out what the, how the person was feeling when they were making comments or how the person was feeling when they had read a book. They started to understand the differences between how French people feel and how Americans feel about this or that or how Spanish people in Spain like cultural differences.
Starting point is 00:04:43 It started to, on its own, started to anticipate emotion. To, yes, anticipate emotion, figure out how people were feeling, understand sentiment. It didn't ask it to do that. No one asked it to do that. Wow.
Starting point is 00:04:56 I know. And then this guy at Rogan says, basically, it makes sense. Because when you ask it to predict the next character, let's say that you wanted to know, Oh, he's given this example of Amazon. What if you wanted to know what the next Product review was going to be the next character in a product review? Well, you'd have to understand the sentiment that people were feeling about that particular particular product and in
Starting point is 00:05:20 Under in order to understand that you would have to understand how that particular white male 42, whatever, was feeling. From Spain, yeah. From Spain was feeling the sentiment behind it so that you could really predict that character well. So it started to break off on its own. AI started to generate its own functions. Assumptions.
Starting point is 00:05:42 It was making assumptions. It was making assumptions, but it needed more assumptions, it needed more facts for those assumptions. That's incredible. It's fucking creepy. It's really creepy. And also very incredible. I mean, listen, I think mainly creepy,
Starting point is 00:05:56 but a little bit incredible. It is incredible. Yeah. And now it makes me certainly believe that we are just in a simulation. We are essentially a computer game that somebody else is playing out there. I cuss out my sim controller all the time. I do. Yeah. That's a regular. It's a regular
Starting point is 00:06:11 thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing.
Starting point is 00:06:19 It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a regular thing. It's a that chat GPT and the only thing I ask you to do is basically when I go, you know What's the commercial break about right? It's so all I ask it. It's questions about the commercial break But I've used it enough to feel like it's not all that good at what it's doing
Starting point is 00:06:35 But I'm also not doing chemistry. I'm not doing chemistry But I've used it for a few things too and I've been pretty impressed with the with the results fair enough And I get and I hear this from a lot of people who are using it. Like I got a friend out there who uses it for like show notes and stuff like that. It's incredible in the legal industry for sure. And chemistry, it's figured out new ways to use medication for cancer. It's figured out, you know, chemical makeups of certain things that it's amazing, but for the everyday joe, I don't know, right?
Starting point is 00:07:05 Is it really changing our lives? Maybe not yet, but it's certainly well if it's thinking on its own. So I go to Bing, which I know owns Chat GPT, and I don't use it ever, but I go to Bing, and I say, tell me about the commercial break podcast. And basically what it comes up with is our, like, you know, when you go to a podcast, you see they have that little pitch, like a paragraph or two, right? The, basically, the, what's the commercial break about? Well, we put that into our hosting program and then it shows up on all of the different
Starting point is 00:07:35 podcast players. Right. So chat GBT just spits that back out of me and I'm like, oh, okay, well, that's not really all that interesting, like Google can do that too. And then I say, and then it says, ask me another question about the commercial break. And I said, who is Frankie B? What came back scared the shit out of me? Tell me more.
Starting point is 00:07:56 The commercial, Frankie B is an ongoing character sometimes played by Brian, the host of the commercial break. Frankie B talks about health, wealth, and relationships. He appears in these episodes. He's been made fun of because he makes tuna at 3.45 in the morning. He's been made fun of because he gives bad vacation reviews. It came back with the most amazing explanation about Frankie B, Then gave me the episodes to go listen to that Frankie B was in even when Frankie B was not in the show notes or the title. Fucking that's crazy intense. I was like, I wonder how Frankie B feels about this. I don't know. I don't I don't Frankie. I know you're listening. So Frankie go out there and Google yourself and see if what comes up Yeah, leave us a comment leave us a comment leave us a review. Well, you're Frankie Just subscribe to us on Apple we would appreciate it
Starting point is 00:08:52 That scared the shit out of you because I was like it went and listen to the podcast and like half a second Yeah, it already listen to the podcast. It did all the digging it did all the digging a week to do I just could not Wrap my head around what had happened. That's pretty intense. So intense that I like jumped out of my seat and I went and grabbed Astrid because I wanted someone to look at this and I know holy shit. Holy shit, look at this. I walked into the kitchen and I'm like Astrid, mind blown, life changing information just
Starting point is 00:09:19 came to me and she was like, I thought you were going to tell me you were cheating on me or something. I'm like, no. Ask it about you next time. Yeah. Ask it about Brian Green. I'm too afraid to. Brian Green is an asshole.
Starting point is 00:09:33 He gets marriage to marriage. It's the marriage to marriage. It's the marriage to marriage. It's the spend at least three days in carcerated. Chat GPT is getting real fucking good. Now, but you know, somebody also told me that you, you, it's garbage in garbage out. So you gotta know the right way to prompt it.
Starting point is 00:09:51 It's true. But then I watch like, somewhat like this guy that I was talking about, he's got, he uses it for the show notes. So he inputs the information, he told me how it does, he inputs the information, basically some bullet points about what they talked about, and then chat GBT of the transcript, and then spits out what it's about.
Starting point is 00:10:08 You can tell it's a right-gy professional, or comedy, or whatever. It'll put a spirit. It's terrible. It's terrible. The show notes are terrible. They're terrible. They sound like they were written by a computer.
Starting point is 00:10:18 Sometimes they don't even make sense. And- Well, you have to edit it. I mean, come on. That's a problem. But the more knowledge you have of what you're after going into it the better the result is that's for sure. I belong to this Facebook group that I don't know, but I joined 5,000 years ago. Do you still use Facebook? I do. You do. I do. Do you have it on your phone? Okay, so this is something to you. It is. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:45 I jumped on this, you know, AI group a long time ago. And they're always giving you like prompts that you can use for certain situations. Like the users will figure out how Jet Chat GPT best responds to prompts and then it uses it. It's like a string of query code. Like I don't understand it. I don't want to go through all that effort just to of query code. Like, I don't understand it. I don't wanna go through all that effort just to search for something. Yeah. I don't know. But it's not practical, I think, for the day to day use.
Starting point is 00:11:09 But in the professional industry, it's definitely got its, it's gets perks. Yeah, I don't know. It's a mediocre comedy podcast or the AI's ever gonna change my life all that much. I had it write some poems for me. I'm like, write me a poem. Oh, really?
Starting point is 00:11:22 Yeah, and it's actually pretty good. Really? Yeah. What did it, what did it, it, they came out with like a beautiful poem? It came out with a book that I'm like, right me a poem. Oh, really? Yeah, and it's actually pretty good. Really? Yeah. What did it, what did it, it like came out like a beautiful poem? It came out with a book that I'm like, a poem that I'm like, I'm gonna have chat you, GPT illustrate this for me and then I'm gonna throw it on Amazon and see what happens. Really? Yeah, I did a pretty good job.
Starting point is 00:11:37 But you're gonna say that it was written by chat GPT. We'll see. Or just put it under like a, a pseudonym. I'm gonna name my little Bingbot. Yeah, you know what I'm gonna have to do? I'm gonna have to do. You know, Bingbot. Oh, they're Bingbot.
Starting point is 00:11:49 They're Bingbot. I love Bingbot. I'm gonna have Bingbot. I think I just figured something out. I'm like figuring this out as we're speaking right now. I'm gonna have Bingbot. I'm gonna tell it to go make me a picture of the sexiest feet in the world doing various foot things.
Starting point is 00:12:04 Yeah. Like, you know various foot things. Yeah. Like, you know, foot things. And then I'm going to input it on the feet finder. Yeah. And Bingbot can have its own foot finder. Let's see if we can make some money. We can make some money into an author, an illustrator, and a foot model. Do you think if I say on feet finder that it's just like BB? Just, yeah, just name yourself Bingbot.
Starting point is 00:12:23 Yeah, Bingbot 1, 2, 3. Yeah. And then people can figure it out and not finger it out. Yeah, or finger it out or not finger it. I've been fingering it out for a long time. Listen to this. This is like the most embarrassing story in the world, but I'll tell it anyway.
Starting point is 00:12:36 Well, actually, you know what? Let's, why don't we do this after the break? I'll tell this story. But if I do, if we do Bingbot, are we like morally obligated to go ahead and tell people? Those morals get out of here. That's true.
Starting point is 00:12:49 You remember that they had that Bingbot that was like the influencer girl? Do you know about this girl? Yeah, there's been a few of them. She got like four million followers. Yeah. And she didn't, and people didn't figure it out for like a year and a half. People are using it to like, you know, take their least favorite politicians and make them say terrible things, and the videos look real.
Starting point is 00:13:07 Absolutely, really. And don't dive into Reddit on all that. Do you know what I got into recently? Did you have Apple TV? I do. Do you have your watch for all mankind? No. That space show?
Starting point is 00:13:17 I got, I fucking watched two episodes, and now Goddamn involved. Every single TV show has been like that for me. Fuck, man, fuck Apple. Apple is prestige TV Netflix. Even when I hate the show, I'm like, I can't stop now. The morning show was so good. Ted Lazo was so good.
Starting point is 00:13:34 For all mankind, now they have a show called Slow Horses, which is about British MI5 officers that are like, they've been relegated to this shitty part of MI5 because they did something wrong, so they're like the degenerates of the MI5. It is so fucking good. So fucking good. Is it funny? Or is it funny?
Starting point is 00:13:55 It's funny. Okay. And interesting. That's how I feel about obliterated. Yeah, obliterated? Okay, let's check that one out. It's not on Apple TV, but it is like you have to stop believing it's real. Yeah, I have to understand.
Starting point is 00:14:06 It's just the rejects. hilarious. It is one of the best television shows about like spy craft that I have ever seen. I can't wait. All right. I have to watch the show. There's now three seasons of it. It's quick.
Starting point is 00:14:23 There's only six episodes per season. It goes quick There's no slow. There's no downtime. No sappy romance. There's no romance, but no sappy like you know 15 minutes. No romance. Yeah But for all mankind is a show about the space program starting back at the beginning of the space program But it's alt history. So it changes what happened. And it, it suggests, or the way that this show goes down, the plot suggests that we actually gave a shit about space after challenger. And we decided to send them in. Yeah. Now there's like 300 astronauts. And they're always launching shuttles and coming back. And I saw what if, yeah. What if happened, right? Including that Senator Ted Kennedy
Starting point is 00:15:08 ended up being the president of the United States after Nixon, after Kennedy, his brother was assassinated. It is a fascinating show. It is really well acted, and now I'm fucking involved. I hate when that happened. I hate it. I also love it. Yeah. Yeah, because I don't have any, I finished obliterated too quickly,
Starting point is 00:15:24 and now I'm like, oh, am I gonna win? I'm only on season two, and I'm like, I also love it. Yeah. Yeah, because I don't have any, I finished obliterated too quickly and now I'm like, oh my God, I want to see. I'm only on season two and I'm like, I can't stop watching it and I don't have time to be involved in another show. I know. I prefer just throwing on some Bravo or Vice
Starting point is 00:15:34 or just letting it fly. Exactly. Why can't I just have my TLC? But Christmas time is bad for TLC because I don't put out many new episodes. I know, it's just bad for pretty much everything. Yeah, fuck it, fuck you Apple. We're in it.
Starting point is 00:15:44 So this is a dessert right now. Yeah. I love it, man. bad for pretty much everything. Yeah, fuck it, fuck you Apple. We're gonna make it so good TV. Tell her that it's a desert right now. Yeah. I love it, man. I love from all mankind. If you have time to watch it and you're into the space program, which I'm not really into the space program, because it really isn't a space program.
Starting point is 00:15:54 Prove positive that it's a great show then. It is a great show. Okay, let's do this. Let's take a break. I'm gonna tell a funny story, and we're gonna talk about Matthew Perry, which I think we have to address this. Yeah, but you know, the Toxicology report came out so now it's not too soon anymore.
Starting point is 00:16:09 Now we get to talk about it. Alright, we'll be back after this break. Look, I know you guys are getting really sick of me, but that is too bad. It's my job. Now go to tcbpodcast.com for all of our audio and video content and get your little booty over to youtube.com slash the commercial break for fully edited video episodes. Want a chat?
Starting point is 00:16:33 Leave us a voice mail at 626-ask-tcb3. To embarrass for your voice to be on the show, we understand Texas instead at 855-tcb-8383. Can't even do that. No worries. Just follow us on TikTok at TCB Podcast and on Instagram at the commercial break. And if you can't even be seen doing that, just listen to these sponsors and let's get back to the show. Hey everybody, want to let you know that this episode is sponsored in part by Factor? Okay, do you want to know what the single biggest challenge for me as a single person was?
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Starting point is 00:19:15 out of your workout and keeping it entertaining and fresh every day. Forget all the new year, new you pressure, And remember, doing something is everything. Shopped Peloton's new year offers at one peloton dot CA slash deals. That's one peloton dot CA slash deals. All access membership separate terms apply. Okay, Matthew Perry said that he passed away, but the toxicology report came out, the autopsy report came out, and Matthew Perry died because of a large amount of ketamine in his system. Now, I think this is becoming a little bit of an issue. Like the ketamine, the DMT, we just talked about this.
Starting point is 00:20:00 Like you can't go willy-nilly half-cocked, you know doing your own DMT, ketamine therapy, because no, you should not. That shit is intense. Let me tell you, I've taken DMT in the form of ayahuasca and it is, you go to a place where there is, you are completely disconnected from any reality for a period of time. And sometimes that lasts for five minutes, like in real human time, not in DMT time. And sometimes that seems like that lasts for hours.
Starting point is 00:20:28 Sometimes you get worried you're just going to be stuck like that. It's terrifying. It's a disassociative. So what that means is you completely disconnect from your body. You are in a different reality. It feels like an out of body experience, but not the kind you get when you're dreaming. You are certainly most definitely awake. And so when you disconnect from your body and you can't feel your toes, your fingers, or see anything in this reality, it is a very scary place today. Very scary. And your thoughts become weapons.
Starting point is 00:20:58 It's true. That's right. And those weapons are used against you because everyone is insecure or worried or stressed about certain. Paranoia sets in, it's dangerous. It's very dangerous. And then to be in a hot tub is a real dumb, dumb fucking thing to do. Definitely never do it alone.
Starting point is 00:21:16 Never. How can you take ketamine and go into a hot tub? Isn't that like human being one on one? How could you, why would you ever want to do it by yourself? I don't understand. Yeah. You know, we were talking about this. Kettamine became like a club drug at some point.
Starting point is 00:21:29 Yep. And there was a story that I read. I don't know what it was in Vice Magazine. How this guy was explaining, you know, I was part of the UK rave scene, you know, documenting the UK rave scene and things changed when Kettamine came, right? It became, went from like this ecstasy, super high love fest that everyone is involved into.
Starting point is 00:21:51 People like on the floor rolling around having seizures because Kettamine is a horse tranquilizer, which will put you in a fucking K hole. And the K hole is real. It's called that. Yeah. And if you've ever been in one, you've been in the K hole. I mean, it's a K-hole. It's a scary place to be.
Starting point is 00:22:07 It's a scary place. There's no fun in it, by the way. I don't know why you would want to, you're right about that. Yeah. Like, why would you want to do that? Why do you want to subject yourself to that easy? Not in public, I mean,
Starting point is 00:22:17 coming off a night at a rave shirt. Okay, but with amongst friends. Amongst friends. But someone is a relatively sober, so they can take care of you. Maybe at least somebody is there that you can get a different opinion from or like are the monsters real?
Starting point is 00:22:31 Yes. And have I in fact died three times in the last 15 minutes? Can you see my body? Cause I can't, yeah. You can get some validations that will keep you from going all the way down. All the way down. It's like a bad trip on an acid.
Starting point is 00:22:44 It can be. Yeah, but on acid, you can certainly go into a down. All the way down. It's like a bad trip on acid. It can be. Yeah, but on acid, you can certainly go into a hole on acid too I have. You can be in a really dark, weird place. You can find the origins of life if you take it out of LSD. But that to me isn't dark, that's fun. I like, I used to like psychedelics.
Starting point is 00:22:59 Maybe you clear about that. I love psychedelics. Yeah, you used to. Now I know better. Now I know that my brain has been filled with too much stress. I'm not going anywhere near today's acid. No, they're fucking kidding me. I don't even hear about LSD anymore.
Starting point is 00:23:12 Oh, it's out there. Is it? It is. Yeah, I have a friend who went and looked at Christmas lights on the last year. Oh, really? Yeah, I was thinking of Christmas. Ask for a few extra hits and we'll do it here
Starting point is 00:23:20 at the commercial break. That'll be a fun episode. That happens. I'd be willing to do it. That'd be the only reason that I would take LSD. But then I had to clear my schedule and my children from the house. For a day or two. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:32 For a day at least. No, no, no, no, no. We're going to feel like our asses. Have a headache on staff. Yes. We're going to feel like our asses to crusty for weeks. That's the worst thing about LSD is you felt so crusty afterwards. The next two days, yeah. You felt like it was. Get all strict now. Yeah. our asses to crusty for weeks. That's the worst thing about LSD is you felt so crusty afterwards.
Starting point is 00:23:45 Yeah, you felt like it was- Get all strict nine. Yeah, that dirt that you just couldn't get off you, your back hurt, your butt hurt, your balls hurt. It was like, my balls never hurt for the record. My balls hurt because of you. I probably punched them at time or two. I think we had some weird times.
Starting point is 00:24:04 Yeah, I think we did have some weird times. If I remember correctly, but of course I was on acid, so what am I thinking? But when I did Ioska DMT, which is not ketamine, but it is a similar, a similar dissociative. It's a derivative, right? Yeah. It's DMT is a derivative chemical that comes from some things in nature, but now they're
Starting point is 00:24:27 making it chemically and I just don't know why the kids would want to do that recreationally. But okay. So, the first time that I did ayahuasca, it was part of a ceremony. I get invited to this house. Legit. Legit. The man, the shot man, is coming from Columbia and he's been invited here by researchers and professors. Oh, okay.
Starting point is 00:24:49 You have been invited to take part in the ceremony is the invitation that I get. How do you say no to that? You can't, you can't. I said yes. And so we're to appear at this guy's house, the guy who was like hosting the shaman, or appeared as house, everybody that was invited,
Starting point is 00:25:04 and we're going to be spoken to by the gentleman who knows the shaman who has invited him here to Atlanta and he has done ayahuasca many times. So this guy looks like the hippie Santa Claus, right? hippie Santa Claus. And he stands up at some point. There's probably 30 of us at this house. We're in this living room.
Starting point is 00:25:24 I'll spread out sitting on the floor and he stands up and some point, there's probably 30 of us at this house, we're in this living room, all spread out sitting on the floor and he stands up and he starts explaining to us what we need to be prepared for because at that time, this is probably 22 years ago, at that time, Iowaska, it's the first time I've ever heard the word DMT. At first time I've ever heard the word Iowaska. He starts explaining to us that we should prepare for many, many, many, he said it three prepare for many, many, many.
Starting point is 00:25:45 He said it three times. Many, many, many deaths. And I was like, what the fuck? I look at my friend who got the invite. And I was like, what the fuck? I thought we were going to party. We were tripping, yeah. And then he says that DMT is like the angel's eye.
Starting point is 00:26:01 It will open you up and it will find where those weak spots are and it will kill them. And but when they when you kill them, you will die. You will feel like you're dying. You will go through the process. You will be reborn again. And this is likely to happen many, many, many time. And I'm like, the fuck?
Starting point is 00:26:23 What are we doing? It's like being invited to the best party in the world, but the invitation says also could cause death. And you're like, what? I'm going to a Christmas party, also could cause death. Sign me up. I was there. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:26:36 There were also paramedics in the room. There were lawyers in the room. There were politicians in the room. There were professors in the room. There were researchers in the room. This was like an esteemed group of people and Brian. So it was like playing the mix. You were being studied.
Starting point is 00:26:50 I think that's essentially what was going on. And he was so spun on about this because there were many, many, many deaths on DMT. It was not the most pleasant of the experiences, but I'll tell you what, it changed the way that I looked at the world for sure. However, I was not in a hot tub. I was...
Starting point is 00:27:08 By yourself. That was in a dark room. Yes. It was in a dark room. With a yoga mat and a blanket. That's right. And a puke bucket. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:16 It's right. A bottle of water, a face mask. Oh my god, that was so intense. I remember like, you know, it was a tea and you drank it. The shaman came around and he would give you tea, right? And so you drink it. And DMT is one of the, or I was cause one of these things that it can affect different people differently.
Starting point is 00:27:32 So some people might need more, some people might need less. It is the worst tasting thing in the world. Worse than mushrooms. Way worse than mushrooms. Way, way, way worse than mushrooms. It is a nasty, bitter, puke-like kind of, it just tastes disgusting. How much did you have to drink?
Starting point is 00:27:49 Three, I think, but I'm not 100% sure. Like ounces or? Oh, it's like a little teacup. Yeah, it's like a tiny little teacup. You swallow it down, then you purge, because everybody purges, almost everybody purges. I love a dragon, it's like you're gonna vomit, but that means it's worth it.
Starting point is 00:28:02 Yes, yeah, I know, that's the worst, isn't it? What? If you don't puke, it's not working. I'm like, I know, that's the worst, isn't it? What? If you don't puke, it's not working. I'm like, I don't want a puke. Can I not puke? I try to avoid that. I know. So this shaman is going around.
Starting point is 00:28:14 Doesn't speak much English, so there's a translator there. And some other person is playing a drum, like, you know, like a... Of course, yeah. A spiritual drum or something. Your vibrations, right? Yeah. So there's like 30 people in this huge circle, in this huge room, and then there's like
Starting point is 00:28:30 paramedics off to the side, and bump, bump, bump, bump, bump, bump, bump, bump, and so I drink purge, and then I'm like, oh yeah, I'm feeling a little loopy. Then around again, most people took another round. Okay, another round again, purge a little bit more after like 15 minutes, but now there's not much in your stomach. And then I was yo, G-O-N-E at first,
Starting point is 00:28:52 it was like you could feel it, like you were like lifting out of yourself. And I was like, oh, this is a very pleasant feeling. You feel like a washing over you? Yeah. Until the entire universe swallowed me whole. Yeah. And then I was a little baby crying for my mommy.
Starting point is 00:29:04 It was really scary, dude. I know not only make it stop, but then I was an actual little baby crying for my mommy. It was crazy. And then just like this cycle after cycle of snakes and spiders and monsters and... True life flashbacks though, or was it like your brain just sort of crafting its own stories? It was my brain crafting its own stories with certain moments in there.
Starting point is 00:29:29 Yes, big moments. Like my mom yelling at me when I was a very young child, a memory that I never had before. When I was a very young child and then feeling like this connection I had with my mom was being ripped away. Like I was being ripped away from my mother. I debate, like just, you know, the opportunity comes around and I'm like, I just don't
Starting point is 00:29:50 think I could do it. I don't know if I want to go through that. I think it's really intense. Yeah, at 25 maybe, 45 maybe not. But you know what they say and I will share this is that once you, you have to be in the right head place for sure. Sure, yeah. You cannot be under any kind of... But when paramedics in the room, I think maybe.
Starting point is 00:30:10 If paramedics, but you forget about that, like it goes away, you're dying, you're dying, right? If you're dying, you're dying, and you're screaming for the paramedics and no one's coming for you, that's like a different story. But you don't even know the paramedics are there because you've lost all consciousness.
Starting point is 00:30:23 But after you've done this a couple of times, you will start to understand a little bit what's going on. And basically, here's what I took away from it. Every molecule, every molecule. In this universe is ultimately connected in some way, shape, or form, and we all fit into that molecule. We are all the God particle, not that I am a God,
Starting point is 00:30:44 but I am part of a God, right? A system, right? A thing that is ultimately scary and loving at the same time. Like death, you know, the destroyer of all. Light in the dark. The light in the dark. However, all of that said,
Starting point is 00:31:01 is that first time when I did it and I come out I come to right the Person who's now given this medicine is standing right in front of me now I'm eyes wide open. I'm still fucked up But I'm eyes wide open and I'm coming back to it's like you get sucked back into your body real quick and what I heard In that room going on around me is something that I cannot fucking describe I've never been able to give it an accurate description. Monkey being murdered by other monkeys. The people were screaming in a way
Starting point is 00:31:36 that I've never heard human beings scream before. It was a guttural animal essay. Gutterl animal. I think it was one of the women that was just screaming in a way that was so intense that it scared the holy shit out of me. Okay, so now, imagine this is going on around, this is where your brain is.
Starting point is 00:31:58 Yeah, now you're awake and you're like holy shit. Yes, now you're like holy shit. Am I really dying? Are people really dying? I don't really die. I did not just die. Yes, then I took some more holy shit. Am I really dying? Are people really dying? Did I just die? Yes, then I took some more tea and went right back into it. But now, imagine all of this,
Starting point is 00:32:10 this is where your head is at, and then you're in a fucking hot tub. How do you control yourself? You can't. No. This is not what you can do. And ketamine is not the exact same experience. It's not that hallucinogenic,
Starting point is 00:32:23 but it's a weird hole that you go down. It sends you into your brain, really. That's the whole point. You don't want to do that by yourself, ever, it's definitely not in a hot tub. So now it's being used for therapy. It's being used for pain management. It's being in the UK, they give people ketamine
Starting point is 00:32:40 when they have traumatic accidents, like you broke your like a major compound fracture in your leg, they'll give you ketamine. Whoa. Because you disassociate from your body. But at least it's not addictive, like the opiate stuff. No, it's not.
Starting point is 00:32:52 So at least it's got that benefit, but I don't know if I'd want to be tripping while my body was recovering from some kind of surgery. You know, that's what they do. I don't know. I saw an actual documentary about doctors that were doing this in the UK, and this guy had a compound fracture in his leg.
Starting point is 00:33:06 Like the kind of compound fracture where the bone is sticking out, you know what I'm saying? And they gave him the DMT. And he was, I mean, at the Academy. And he was in a whole nother world. He was happy. He was like, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, that's good.
Starting point is 00:33:18 He definitely not going back to work. No. Oh, oh, oh. But this is being used in all these different ways, all these kind of like off label ways, but Matthew Perry was doing the therapy with ketamine, but he didn't die from therapeutic amounts of ketamine. And he had stocked that therapy three weeks before his death.
Starting point is 00:33:37 Whoa. Because the doctor said, I think you've had enough. Like I think you've had enough. They also found like opiates and Xanax and... Yeah, that's what I thought happened. All this other stuff. But he's still three weeks later had the ketamine in his system. Well, the doctor, the autopsy explained
Starting point is 00:33:53 that the half life of ketamine, which is pretty quick. Like within four hours, it's half life. It's half life. Yeah, it's half life. So he said there's no way that he could have died from the ketamine. The levels in his body indicate that he had taken that that day, that night. He had taken too much of it.
Starting point is 00:34:11 And that just makes me so freaked out. That's not a way to die. No, especially alone, it's so sad. I know. I guess there's not going to be a friends reunion, huh? Oh. Do you think there's going to be a friends reunion. The one where Matt dies.
Starting point is 00:34:27 Probably not the last I made that I don't think he showed up. He did show up. Did he? A hot fucking mess. And they said he was obviously intoxicated. Yeah. If you watch the special, he was obviously intoxicated a couple of years ago. Yeah, it was like the beginning of the pandemic.
Starting point is 00:34:41 Remember, he was going to save everybody from the pandemic that they had this one television show. It was very, I certainly thought it was okay, but then it prompted us to go back and watch friends from the beginning, and we got through two episodes, and we were like, this just didn't age well. It's not a lot of fun. You know what it's not about kids?
Starting point is 00:34:55 I think it did because my both of my kids have watched it all the way through multiple times. Really? And they like it. Friends? Yeah, I think it makes them jealous that they didn't sort of have that sort of upbringing or that friendship opportunity in their 20s because everything so disconnected with the phones and the pandemic sent them home from school and so I think it was just like that
Starting point is 00:35:20 I hate to say nostalgic because they're young adults you know they're not harkening back to a time when things were different. They're not harkening back to a time when things were different. They're just seeing it for the first time. But I think they're just like, wow, this would have been really cool to have a spot to have a group of friends and just go meet up and hang out.
Starting point is 00:35:34 Yeah, I think it's just, I don't disagree with them. Like what a weird, what a different time to grow up. The most interaction that you get is on a screen. And so much of their interaction is that way. Yeah, I was talking to Chrissy, I think, and I had read a study that said that one third of your, the one third of the months that you live on the earth is dedicated to sleep. Right. One third of the months on this earth, if you live to 90 years old, one third of your time will be spent in traffic, pooping, eating,
Starting point is 00:36:06 otherwise other activities that have to do with, like just being a human being, in the modern society. And then one 92% of the remaining third for anybody over the age of 18 in 2023 will be spent on a digital device. Oh my gosh, that makes me nauseous. Isn't that crazy? Yeah, that's nuts. Isn't that insane? Yeah. Oh my gosh, that makes me nauseous. Isn't that crazy? Yeah, that's nuts.
Starting point is 00:36:26 Isn't that insane? Yeah, I don't like that. That makes me so sad. For our kids, for everybody, for society. Like, we don't know how to interact with each other anymore. I think we do. I think I make friends a lot faster than my son, my daughter. You know, I think our generation,
Starting point is 00:36:43 are the, I don't know, anyone over 35 maybe. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, we're a little more movie and shaky, and we can just say hi to someone online and make a friendly conversation. They don't do that. They don't just randomly interact with each other. You know, Esther says that about me all the time. She's like, you make friends with anybody.
Starting point is 00:36:59 Everywhere I go, yeah, I come home with a, like, yeah, I've got friends all over the place. If I go on vacation, I come back with some phone numbers or Facebook connections or, you know, call me next time you're in town. Yeah, I mean. And I told her, I said, I think it has to, well, first of all, we have two different personalities. She's a little more reserved than I am.
Starting point is 00:37:15 And I am not reserved about anything. I'm a fucking buddy for every reason. Yeah, you're like me. You just go out in the world and, you know, whoever's in your face, you're gonna talk to you, right? Yeah, we're gonna, we're gonna get some. They'll be a laugh or two. But I also think it has to world and, you know, whoever's in your face, you're going to talk to you, right? Yeah, we're going to, we're going to get some, they'll be a laugh or two. But I also think it has to do with, you know, even though the age difference isn't like 40 years, it is enough that
Starting point is 00:37:31 she grew up in the digital age and I had internet when she was born. Yeah, that's right. I had internet when I was 14. That's when the internet came out. My first email was at 21. I got my first email address at 21. That's right, me too. But there were email addresses for a long time.
Starting point is 00:37:45 I was just one of these people who thought that the internet was a fad. I did not. I mean, yeah, I was working for Home Depot and I had a baby at the time. I just didn't need an email. I was at the Chili's. Why does I need an email? Who's gonna email? I didn't have internet at my apartment.
Starting point is 00:37:58 What's the point? Yeah, I could afford that. I had that AOL, you know, AOL would send me a disk every five minutes. B-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D- of porn in my then girlfriend at the time who was living with me came home. I was in the middle of downloading it. I had to turn off the screen and let it download. Yeah, six hours. I know seven hours later, I turn it back on. And it's like a picture of a boob.
Starting point is 00:38:36 And I'm like, oh, this is not interesting at all. At least it wasn't like spam. I guess spam wasn't a thing back then. Yeah. I would have been a fun way to spam people. Oh, yeah. Oh, you waited two hours for this download? Guess what? Guess what? It's not a tip. It's a hot dick. It's two dicks. Talk to each other. Have you noticed the proliferation of dicks and television
Starting point is 00:38:55 these days? There's a lot of dick out there. It is crazy. We're at Pete dick. I find myself like, where are the tits? They're not there anymore. Huge tits. They look like prosthetics. Some of them are. Sometimes they put on them. I hope to go. Yeah, because whenever they show a dick on TV, I'm still shocked by that. I know. Most of the time they show those dicks and it's like, they clearly have to pump themselves up a little bit before that, right? Are they're not real? Yeah. Hoping they're just... They're not walking around with seven and a half inches flaccid. Are they? No way. No way.
Starting point is 00:39:26 No way. Yeah. No, no, not that many of them anyway. No. No. On real actors, especially. Tom Cruise is like two, two, right? He's like two foot two.
Starting point is 00:39:36 Yeah. He had his dick out. I'm sure it wouldn't be that seven and a half inch. And I wanted to show it on camera. He'd be like, I'm going to need the makeup artist to come and pump it up a little bit. Just blow it down. Well, that's what I'm gonna show it on camera, he'd be like, I'm gonna need the makeup artist to come. Just plump it up a little bit. Just blow it down. Well, that's what I'm wondering. You know, you can like, when you...
Starting point is 00:39:50 They've gotta be fake because there's no curvature in any of the ones I've seen lately. Well, you can, I mean, that's how to explain it. The minutia of a penis. Like, you can put blood in there and it kinda hangs down and it's, you know, it's not fully erect, but it's a softy, right? Yeah. But it's also not like a little butting up. It's waking up, there you know, it's not fully erect, but it's a softy, right? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:40:05 But it's also not like a little but- It's waking up. He's waking up. There you go. It's not a little button. It's somewhere in between. Yeah, it's not fresh out of the pool. But it's still hanging out.
Starting point is 00:40:13 And whenever I see a tick on TV, I feel like they've just, they're in that constant state. This is a spacket real quick. Yeah. I think they probably, that's what I would do. For sure. If someone asked me to go naked on camera, I would pump myself up a little bit, just a little bit.
Starting point is 00:40:27 I'd be like, hey, I don't want a full hard, but give me like a half hard. Let me not look like I just got a, yeah. Yeah, let me not have a bulletin. You know, they said I have a camera, it's 10 pounds. I thought you'd like an edge 10. Can it just focus it in this general reach? That's right, I just wanted to look like a fat dog pointing directly down.
Starting point is 00:40:46 A brat-work. I don't want to seem creepy, but I also don't want to seem sure. But that's all I feel about these ones showing up on these shows. I'm like, where did you, what? Is that how this guy got the role? It's got to be a prosthetic. It's got to be. I'm going to do some investigating.
Starting point is 00:40:58 Well, you remember that movie? What was that movie? Boogie Nights? I do. Mark Walker. Dirk Diggler had like a foot and a half long dick. Yeah. And I remember seeing that scene for the first had like a foot and a half long dick and I remember seeing that scene for the first time which what a great movie by the
Starting point is 00:41:08 way great movie but I remember seeing that scene for the first time and I was like holy shit there's a guy that had them and then I saw the guy with the world's largest penis what largest recorded penis and this is a guy named Jonah something he has a podcast about like the Yankees or the Metz. He's been on the Stern show. He has the world's largest penis. He's a rather strange human being in general. But I think his dick is like 21 and a half inches long or something. Can you slow down? Yeah. Nobody. Yeah, nobody can manage that. You're gonna get the facts straight. Hey Bing, largest, well, I guess longest, huh?
Starting point is 00:41:49 Let's ask Bing. Yeah, what's the, who has the longest penis in the world? 21 inches. Oh, wait, okay. So Roberto Cabrera is a 56 year old Mexican citizen known as El Centario. Ha, ha, ha, ha,ario. It's a centaur. The man with the largest penis in the world is 48 centimeters long.
Starting point is 00:42:13 So it's about 20. It's about 24 inches. No, I think it's like 21, 20, 24. What was it? 48 centimeters. 48 centimeters to inches is 19 inches long, 18.9. Holy shit. Okay, wait, there's another guy.
Starting point is 00:42:32 Jonah, that's too much. Jonah, longest penis. Do you remember that price is right game where they were like, that's too much. That's how I feel about that. Like, no, back it up. Jonah Falcon. Jonah Falcon world's biggest dick claiming to have the world's largest business.
Starting point is 00:42:56 Excuse me. Does the, are we not just discussing girth? This is just length. This is just length, but you know the girth comes with it. He always. Okay, he is 13 and a half inches long. Erect 10 inches long. Flassid. 10 inches. Tina. Flassid. Flassid. Yeah. 10 inches. So he's definitely not one of those. I know. I'm not a grower or not a shower. He shows. He shows. He shows.
Starting point is 00:43:19 I'm a grower. Yeah, but you know that like I think I read about one of these two guys. I think that was the Mexican gentleman who has like the war really the world's largest pain I'm getting this book thought 18 19 inches long Jesus Christ I read about him that he can't get a full erection Yeah, it's a big to all the blood from the body Yeah, I'll take it out of his head. It'll pass out poor guy. What a curse poor bastard. Can't you do like a penis reduction? I'm sure there's penis reduction surgery I thought of it. I know they can't know way. I don't know you just cut in the middle a you do like a penis reduction? I'm sure there's penis reduction surgery. There's got to be a thought of it. I know.
Starting point is 00:43:45 No, they can't know way. I don't know. You just cut in the middle a little bit like a hot dog. Try to stitch back up. I don't know after much of the sex of me. What's going on in there? I know. Leave it alone. I agree with you. You got cursed. But if you could never have a full of erection. Total curse. Yeah, that's a total curse. And I wonder, you probably don't even have a good lady either. No way. Because there's no chance. How would you ever get late? Who wants 19 inches?
Starting point is 00:44:06 Nobody. No one can take 19 inches. Nope. They'd be up in your throat. Even if you wanted to, it would be very uncomfortable. Not something I'll ever have to worry about. Not one of those pain pleasure. No, no, no.
Starting point is 00:44:16 Get in there. No. And not something I'll ever have to worry about. Please. It's coming out of my dead. All right, let's take one more break and then we'll be back. Okay. Okay, Brian, shh.
Starting point is 00:44:32 Let me give the people what they want. Our social media handles. Follow us on Instagram at the commercial break and on TikTok at TCB Podcast. If like all my hinge dates, you are thirsty for more. Give us a call and leave us a message at 626-ask-TCB3. Or send us a text, no sexting please, at 855-TCB-8383. And of course, go to tcbpodcast.com to see everything there is to see. Now let's hear from our sponsors and then the show is going. Every new year there's tons of pressure to work out. To already be lifting big and running marathons on January 1st, but often the pressure to be amazing stops people from even starting, when really the only thing that matters is
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Starting point is 00:46:25 You only find out about it on reddits afterwards. But apparently 15 to 16% 14 to 16% of men reportedly have this. And it's basically just like an ongoing pain sensation, much like if you got amputeleg amputated, you'd have these like phantom pains. Yes. There's a phantom pain in your moths of difference or whatever. Okay. So. Vos your Mazda difference or whatever. Okay, so, Vaz.
Starting point is 00:46:46 Vazda difference, sorry, Mazda difference. So, in your Mazda difference. So, I go on Reddit and I'm just trying to figure out, like, am I gonna be stuck with this pain forever? Is this normal? Whatever, and they start explaining this. And then in a rather mature Reddit group, which I didn't think that existed, but there is.
Starting point is 00:47:05 There are a few, yeah. Yeah, these gentlemen are talking and they're talking about, you know, how you can eliminate pain, alleviate pain, all this other stuff. And one of the things that they share is that when you have to go do your homework, let me explain, when you get a vasectomy, you are cutting the tubes, but there may still be some gentlemen left in the tubes. Some of those semen might still be on their little cruise ships inside of the tube that has been cut.
Starting point is 00:47:29 So in order to make sure that you're perfectly okay to clear the pipes, so to speak, you have to do homework, and that homework basically consists of... EPMs. Wacking off, that's right. Wacking off a certain amount of times in a certain period of time,
Starting point is 00:47:42 and then you send in a sample. Yeah, and they check and make sure no swimming. Which, by the way, is totally fucking embarrassing because here's what it, they give you this box with this cup and there's instructions in the cup, right? Tina, and one of the instructions is, before you intend to drop off the sample, before you do the action, call your doctor's office
Starting point is 00:48:03 to let them know you're going to be doing this because the doctor has to be present. Yeah, I'm about to whack off. Can you please have a doctor available when I bring my jizz cup in? It's so embarrassing. Like just the thought, I mean, I'm a rather like not prudish guy, but I don't like the thought of having to call somebody. Tell them I whacked off and is somebody there to take my. I'm about to do it.
Starting point is 00:48:23 Yeah, I'm about to, I'm getting there now. Let me put you on FaceTime. Can I speak to you? Oh my God. I can't. That's too much. So one of the one of the strings of this Reddit post says listen, if you have this pain yanking your chain, it's not going to feel So one of the strings of this Reddit post says, listen, if you have this pain, yanking your chain, it's not going to feel pleasantly. So you might wanna think about getting a toy that will allow you to have a pleasure sensation
Starting point is 00:48:55 without all of the yanking. Such as a pocket pussy. Okay, I'm making sure. Like a vibrating, yeah, flashlight. But one of the electronic ones that like does the work, the work where you can just like stick it in, leave it there and do this thing, right? So I have to tell my wife about this because I don't want to be the guy who's ordering pocketpussies to that.
Starting point is 00:49:14 I'll send the kids are on figure. Ryan, what is this? Exactly. Yeah. Merry Christmas. I, but I, it's a flashlight. I, but I it's a flashlight. But I can I borrow that.
Starting point is 00:49:30 Is it even the shower? Yes, I'm just going to I'm going to put one in every shower. That's how open we are here at the family. They have a flashlight that sticks to the wall. I know. And then you can fuck it. I'm unfortunately. That is for masters. Hey, listen, however you get off this cool with me.
Starting point is 00:49:45 But so I go on to this website, I won't mention the website, but you probably can figure it out. There's a huge website that sells the story. I agree. So I go on there and I'm basically just looking for refills. Reveals, yeah, you have to read your refills. Exactly, right?
Starting point is 00:50:01 You don't want to be the guy who gets the flashlight that doesn't work or gets your d gets your dicks that can there. Yeah. So I'm making your reviews about these electronic flashlights, essentially pocket buses. And I pick the one that's got the best reviews, right? Sure. This one does the trick.
Starting point is 00:50:16 No action needed. Does it all for you? I want 5,000 five star reviews. Yes, exactly. I at least want one one star review from a really creepy guy that says, I've fucked everything else out there. This is the best pocket busie ever. I'm least want one one star review from a really creepy guy that says, I've fucked everything else out there. This is the best pocket pussy ever. I'm a pocket pussy master.
Starting point is 00:50:29 It's right. So I just order that one. Then they say, oh, you free, happy holidays, free gift. Oh yeah, they're probably like eight or 10. Oh, you got to pick one. Nice. They had like four different options
Starting point is 00:50:43 and you could pick one, but it was Dildos. So I'm like, well, I'm not interested in the Dildo, but I'll get one for my beautiful wife if she wants to play with it, she can play with it, right? And so, so I pick one, Tina, I literally have never owned a sex toy in my life, not a man's sex toy. I've never owned one in my life. All of them.
Starting point is 00:51:04 We either are shocking. Yeah. You've never owned an actual sex toy? I've never owned one in my life. All of them. We either are shocking. You've never owned an actual sex toy? Men's sex toy. Oh, men's sex toy. So there you go. Now, all of the women that I've dated have owned multiple sex toys, and I know why that is, because when you're dating Brian, you've got to get a sex toy. So I order this, whatever, normal shipping, and then a couple of days ago, we're getting
Starting point is 00:51:24 all these boxes that are coming in the door, like for Christmas, you know, all these boxes. We've got to hide them from the kids because, you know, we don't, you know, you know, hold your alarm. I didn't want to say it all that. In case you're listening with kids in your car, in which case you're a terrible parent. And so then I get this notification, oh, your special package has arrived. It comes in a very non-discreet package has arrived. And they text you email you and call you from pocketpussy.com. This is Brian's a pervert, right? Yeah, it says pocketpussy.com.
Starting point is 00:51:56 Some girl bento. Pervert lives here. Getting mail in the ass. No, it actually comes in a completely non-discord box. It just says, Brian, my address, and that's it. So I get it. I throw it in my closet so the kids, you know, so I'm not opening it in the kitchen. What's this?
Starting point is 00:52:17 Yeah. Kids go to sleep and then I open the box. Let me explain to you what I got. What I thought I was getting was a a fleshlight like this size of like like a megaphone right like this like you know something you could hold in your hand. Yeah. Tina what I got was a small Volkswagen with a big hole in the back of it. That's what I got. You're dirt diglin. I thought I was dirt dig it. What I got was insane. It was a contraption.
Starting point is 00:52:46 You have to charge. You have to charge it. What do you mean? Tina, it is this huge. It's like this big. It looks like a pill capsule that's almost a foot and a half long. And then it's got the flesh,
Starting point is 00:53:04 it's got the vagina right there, which you can take out the vagina to clean it. It's okay, fair enough. And then it's got this little, I don't know how to describe it, but imagine okay, there's a big clown show pill that has a bunch of buttons on it. And then there's this little tongue
Starting point is 00:53:21 that sticks out of the bottom of it, so it can cup your nuts. And then you screw the vagina. And then I guess you gizz in it and then you clean it out, right? That's what I'm assuming happens. What do you have to charge it for? Because it's got sucking and vibrating. That was the whole point. The whole point is I can't yank because yanking hurts. So rather than use my hands, you just set it in there, set it in there and then it vibrates. Yeah or twists around or sucks or whatever this thing You have a sex by I have a sex spot a sex pill
Starting point is 00:53:52 But this is not the joy. You're looking. These are not the droids. You're looking for. Oh, yes, they are Bend over there see three P.O. Yeah, see three D.O. I am. That's news for me. You didn't know these things existed? I did not. Okay. I didn't either until one arrived at my front door.
Starting point is 00:54:15 I thought I was getting this small little contraption that was gonna make it like a... Did you just stick in the shower? Like we were just talking about, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Like that kind of thing, right? And then I would, you know, somehow figure out how to get off.
Starting point is 00:54:24 They've come a long way I've heard. They have whole, they put these things inside of human life-sized dolls. Dolls, now. The vibrate. The vibrate. And so, and fuck. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:54:35 I don't have battery toys, no batteries. I don't. You don't do batteries. And batteries. So it's all new to me. But my friends are saying that they have devices now. Pocka posies? Yeah. No, no, no. Dildos, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Listen, there are a lot more female sex toys than there are male sex toys, but the male sex toys have come a long way
Starting point is 00:55:05 because when I was a kid, there was no male sex toy. Well, straight male. There are plenty of them. Yeah, okay, gotcha. There were no straight male sex toys, at least that I knew of when I was a kid. And I've done all the shots,
Starting point is 00:55:15 kind of, like, the rocket poses in the back. Yes. And you had like, bees very shamefully asking, I'm not getting laid. Please take me to the floor. Yeah, you had to.
Starting point is 00:55:22 You had to know what you were looking for, and then you had to give your ID so they could do a credit. That's right. A credit and a criminal job. Did I ever tell you I got kicked out of a nine and a half weeks? What, nine and a half weeks, by the way, is a store here in Atlanta. It used to be. It's not a run in the morning.
Starting point is 00:55:38 It had like five or six locations. It was a sex shop. I'm 19 years old. I've got my infant daughter. She's like six weeks old. Oh no way. Strap to my chest and I'm going in there and they're like, man, you cannot bring the child. She's under 18. She's six months old. Six weeks. Six weeks. She was just a tiny. She still fit in the world. Papuska, you know, they kicked me out. You were getting after it.
Starting point is 00:56:03 I was trying. Okay. I just leave the kid in the car. I was real close. Hey, sir, do you mind? Yeah. Can you do me a favor? Just give me a second. Pick out a purple one and bring it to me.
Starting point is 00:56:14 Just work here with the baby. Yeah. I'll be right back. Just looking for the pocket, pocket, pussy section. I guess I'll hold your baby. Some like, creefoid outside. Yeah. I'll take your baby. Some like, creefoid outside. Just like, I'll take your baby. Can you please hurry,
Starting point is 00:56:28 there's a weirdo watching my show. No, shit. Well, I kicked out. I can understand. I got it. What's this rules of rules? Yeah. She's under 18.
Starting point is 00:56:35 She's not shopping, sorry. If you understand, she doesn't even see in color yet. I forgot snakes. So I got this thing and I go into assert and I'm like, I don't know what the fuck I'm doing with this pocket pussy because it's just crazy.
Starting point is 00:56:48 What do I do? So then she looks at it and she's like, this thing is crazy and I'm like, I know. And she's like, do you really want to use it? But you're just saying, you don't want to use it so that you can, she's like, you can give it a try. And I'm like, I know I can give it a try. I'm not bare as I told you I was buying it.
Starting point is 00:57:01 But I just don't want to have a small car on my dick. That's not what I'm interested in, too. I don't want to have a small car on my dick. That's not what I'm interested in, too. I don't want to try to look at folks. I don't want to be the fuck the tailpipe of a fiat. I don't have that fetish. That's not my thing. No, no, no, no, that's that for me. At all.
Starting point is 00:57:16 I'm not interested. It was, you know, I just know. I've not, I'm not even with it. You're still, it's you're so scared of it. I'm scared of it. I'm not scared of it. I'm just not interested in it. Yeah. Like I have to be in the mood
Starting point is 00:57:28 and I don't want the mood to be I'm fucking a pillball. And then try to figure the robot out. I turned it on. I press the buttons to see what it does, but you don't really know until you get inside of it. Sure. But I can hear it go. Pfft.
Starting point is 00:57:42 Pfft. Pfft. Pfft. Which is a sound I hate in here. I know, dude. I do too. but I can hear it go. Ttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt Yeah, I don't want to be concerned about. Yeah, I'm wondering how I get inside this thing without hurting myself, actually. And then they give you like a bottle of lube, a bottle of cleaning solution. How do you maintain an erection? Dealing with all of that equipment. I don't think you can.
Starting point is 00:58:15 Yeah, I mean, I'm listening. I'm sure that there's plenty of men who like this and because they wouldn't be selling them. They wouldn't have 5,000 five star reviews that people would like. But you need a medical purposes, not because you're yeah, seeking some sort of. No, satisfaction. Yeah, not because I'd necessarily wanted or needed, but because I think it's going to help me do my homework. Yes, without additional pain, because what I'm really
Starting point is 00:58:38 concerned about is maintaining an erection through all the pain, right? That's what I'm really concerned about. So I don't know if I try and I'll let you know. Of course I will, but I'm telling you right now, I just don't think this is the one for me. Yeah. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Yeah. We're gonna have to break up.
Starting point is 00:58:53 I'm sorry pocket pussy 3000. I'm sorry. What if it starts talking back to me? Oh God. You better fuck me. The minute they start putting fucking AI in those things, I know. I 100% And they're starting to with the dolls. Yes And they're starting to eat with the dolls, I know.
Starting point is 00:59:06 They have with the dolls. I know, it's, that's. Here's the most disturbing trend in men's sex toys that I can tell you. That was dolls. Those dolls, but then the flesh lights and the pocket pussies, like mainly the flesh light. Now they have a different mold for different porn stars.
Starting point is 00:59:22 Oh. So you can have your favorite porn stars pussy that you're fucking. And that, to me, feels a little bit, I mean, I understand, these girls are probably making great money. How do they take those fucking molds? That's weird.
Starting point is 00:59:35 They put a, like, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. The mechanics aren't lining up for me. Yeah, I guess you'd have to stick like the gel inside. But then it's not gonna take a shape. I don't know. To be honest with you, do you really know?
Starting point is 00:59:50 I mean, can you show me? No, you would know. They're just like, make that one a little smaller. Yeah, give this one a little bigger. Make that one shorter. Make this one smaller. That's right. Long clip, small clip, big lips.
Starting point is 00:59:59 That's right. Inside, outside. That's right. On the inside, it's all the same. You know what I'm saying? They have to be. But I'm thinking that the, one of the reasons why you would want a flashlight
Starting point is 01:00:09 of your favorite porn star, this is where my head goes, is so that you can like, you know, fuck along with it. While you're watching. Yeah, and I get this like creepy vision of like men in their basements. See if I found out,
Starting point is 01:00:20 linking out the flashlight. Yeah, I mean, that makes it, it gives me stalker vibes. Yeah, it's kind of weird But listen, whatever anybody's into I got hurting anybody, you know, so if anybody has a good pocket pussy recommendation Let me know this episode brought to you by Disney That's why Mickey doesn't talk that's right and now
Starting point is 01:00:43 Beings got some more information to work with. Hallelujah. Yeah. Does Brian use a pocket pussy? It's gonna show up. Oh, you know. I'm gonna go ask my Bingbot. Oh yeah.
Starting point is 01:00:53 Ask your Bingbot about Brian's pocket pussy when there's episode there. Now, just tell me about Brian Green. Brian uses a pocket pussy. Brian uses a Volkswagen. Here's the sound it makes. So, so, so, so, so, so, Brian uses a Volkswagen Here's the sound it makes Now taking recommendations that TCB podcast.com
Starting point is 01:01:11 It's a contact us button drop down menu I have a pocket pussy send email send email send pictures please No, don't do it. Okay, don't do that my wife will free No, we're in a big spot. The't do that. My wife will freak out. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. The second to dick pic comes through tcbpodcast.com. Aster's gonna cut the show with the D. Oh, you can be out of this one. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:01:32 Tcbpodcast.com is where you go. You find out more information about the show. All the audio, all the video right there from one location. You can also get your free pic-y fronting sticker. They will come in January. I shot my load early. No pun intended pun intended. Well played.
Starting point is 01:01:48 Thank you. I actually told everybody that they were available and they were still at the printers. So I'm sorry. I jumped the gun. I didn't realize they weren't here yet. But you'll get them. So if you have put in a request, you will get one. Don't worry.
Starting point is 01:02:01 We've got a nice little system going on here. It's like I scream at Astrid. Send a sticker to 345 Smith Street! And she replies, I'm not talking to you! You got a pocket pussy in your closet! This thing is scary, it's scary, it's chasing me around the hallway! I thought you weren't gonna charge it! Yeah!
Starting point is 01:02:24 It comes kind of free charge. Anyways, go to the website, hit the contact us button, drop down menu, I want my free sticker, give us your address, we'll send you one. I promise they're coming. 626, ask TCB the number 31626, ask TCB and the number 3. Toll free anywhere in the world, you can send us your questions, comments, concerns, or content ideas. Asprimes, mom, as T-C-B, we're taking them all.
Starting point is 01:02:49 Come on, bring them. You can also leave a voicemail if you want your voice on the show. If you don't, don't leave a voicemail. There's a piece of advice. youtube.com slash the commercial break. At the commercial break on Instagram, T-C-B podcast on TikTok, and we hope you have a wonderful new year to everybody out there. Thanks for being a part of the show.
Starting point is 01:03:09 Thanks for being the best part of the show, quite frankly. Okay, Tina, I love you. I love you. Best of you. Best of you out there on the podcast universe. Until next time, Tina and I. I always say, we do say and we must say goodbye. Every new year, there's tons of pressure to work out.
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Starting point is 01:04:59 you

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