The Commercial Break - From Russia With Love (And Money)!

Episode Date: September 11, 2023

Love me, love me, say that you love me...and also please give me lots of money pleeeeeease! Krissy & Jeff got roped into 90 day fiance Gogglebox Nothing’s fair! The Atlanta-Barcelona diarrhea flight Brown Barcelona Dump Matthews Band Disneyland Paris International looooooove The mail order bride business Love Me A bunch of middle aged white guys…no surprise Farming isn't a hot job! “Something about Russian brides” American women, they just don't get it 5 minute dates? We don't buy it Pay per translation–ever heard of google translate? Road trips don't have purpose This is a wild party Bryan understands these old men   LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us or leaving a voicemail at: 1.855.TCB.8383 Speak to TCB LIVE by calling 775.TCB.LIVE (1.775.822.5483) Tuesday-Thursday 12pm-5pm EST Watch TCB on YouTube Creator: Bryan Green Co-Host: Bryan Green Co-Host: Krissy Hoadley Written By: Bryan Green Exec Producers: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Content Production & Research: Tina Khano YouTube Producer & Editor: Morgan Please Producer & Audio Editor: Christina A. Executive Director: Astrid B. Associate Producer: Gustavo Episodic Contribution: Marianne, Diane, Natalie, Will The Champ, Will D**    

Sir, are you gay? Yes, I am. Do you care about John Oliver? I don't even know who that is. Oh, okay. What about Wendy Williams? Of course I do. Yes, thank you.

On this episode of the commercial break. I am handsome and awesome and would like a Russian bride to suck on my penis most days and not talk back to me at all because I am the American version of a Russian stud. Go Google! The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Oh yeah, Katsukutans, welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green, this is the director of Audiovisual Services. Kristen Joy Holy, best to you, Chris.

That's the Brian. Best to you out there in the podcast universe. D DASI! You can't go on drinking, opening an avion, everybody! DASI! I have gotten Chrissy and probably Jeff by default. Yeah, Brayden. I have gotten Chrissy and probably Jeff by default.

Rapt in, roped in, fully engaged in the 90 day fiancee universe and I couldn't be more proud of myself. My life's work is done. I can now go. It took four years. You took four years and a conversation about it probably four times a month in every episode we talk about. 90 day fiancee, but she is fully hooked. Yeah, I'm going back and watching them from the from the start

So I'm watching Seth and I was old but you know, it's just fascinating. Oh, it's endlessly fascinating Now you're on the season with Darcy and I can't remember his name because no one cares Yeah, he's a jerk off the what is he? Austrian? No, he's from Amsterdam Amsterdam He's a jerk off the what is he? Austrian now he's from Amsterdam Amsterdam Lassie all the drinking and pussy lips everywhere you got to stop She had one drink one time and he was like we got to talk about your alcoholism He had to have promised me to never drink never drink again in my presence You have fine woman with many high qualities. I can't think of them right now, but all the alcohol is washing your vagina

in the other men's dicks. It's bothersome, madassi. I guess she went off on some social media tear too. And so now he's forbid her from being on social media. Oh yeah, he's a total... He's a total... He just couldn't. Oh, he just wants to control her.

Well, that's it. That's like the whole premise of this season focusing on Darcy and this guy. Darcy being a woman from New Jersey who is plastic, fantastic. And I mean, plastic, fantastic. This girl has spent a lot of money getting a lot of work done. She is. And it was funny because they were showing, it was her birthday.

And this one episode I'm watching and they got in a hotel room in New York and she wakes up and he's like, hello darling, you know, happy birthday. Hi, and she wakes up and emerges from the covers and she's fully makeup. Like, I'm talking like dark eye shadow, the whole thing. It's of course, it's highly edited show. You didn't just wake up. No, of course not.

You know, there's like morning scenes and like some of these scenes. They're obviously not even column staged, but they're pre-ordained. But like, okay, at eight o'clock we're gonna come, we're gonna start filming Darcy. We wanna see you waking up with, you know, whatever his name is.

And it's all just so, but it's so fantastic. Even though I dislike Stacey with a, Darcy with a passion, because she's just as obnoxious as he is, but he is really controlling. She's obnoxious in a way that I just don't like her personality. He's mean and controlling is what he is, and he's a gas lighter, man. Oh, I know. It's hard to watch. Listen, and the guy is like a 22 year old Amsterdamian model.

Body builder. Body builder. Model. Yoga instructor. You know, one of these types, self-help guru, who goes around the world. I've seen his Instagram. He goes around the world on the backs of his one season of 90 day fiancee fame. maybe two seasons, maybe two seasons. But he goes around and he'll show up at like literally like a shitty motel in, I don't know, East London. And then he gives a seminar on self help. And there are, there is nobody attending these seminars.

There's like six guys sitting in chairs, there's 40 chairs, six human beings in those chairs. And he's giving a motivational speech about what I don't know, what could you possibly know about life at 22 years old? I don't know. I'm not saying that darn some 22-year-olds out there that aren't old souls and know what they're talking about. He's not one of them.

No. Jossi, you can never drink again. You've brought embeddism in my family and my penis. It's like, dude, settle down. You got a six pack, you got a 12 pack, what else could you want? I mean, you don't need to be that controlling when you have a 12 pack.

Just move on to the next person. Because Darcy is a 52 year old woman who has spent hundreds of thousands of dollars plumping herself up in many different ways. And why are you two together in the first place? I don't care about the age difference, but they have nothing in common. No, they really don't.

I know I keep thinking that whenever I'm watching their segments because I'm like, how are they so in love with each other? I'll tell you how I met Dasi on Instagram and then she said, let's do 90 days, y'all say. You know that the producers of this show have the pick of the litter. Now that they're on season 14 or whatever, 15, 16, 24, I don't know.

Now that they're on, now that they have a well-oiled machine going on, they have the pick of the litter. They can pick the craziest couples with the craziest stories. No longer is it just like a novelty. We went looking for some people who are doing this. Now it's, they probably have stacks and stacks of applications and online videos that they watch. And you know that there are people out there

that are finding love overseas and the only thought in their head is, I can be on 90 day fiance. True, now that it's such a, you know, it's been out there for a while. Yeah, because these people are getting paid, I don't think you're getting paid a lot, maybe $5,000 in episode.

Just thought maybe like day rate. You think day rate season one. Okay. Okay. But by the time you get the season three, I think probably be five to $7,000. And if you're Angela or Angela and Michael, if you're someone who's been on for 12 seasons, every iteration. I mean, they were on the before the 90 days, then they were 90 day, then they're happily ever after. Question mark. Question mark. Happily ever after. You know, there's this fascinating show, oh go ahead, I'm sorry,

and then now they're on the last resort. Yeah. Well, that's what I was going to say. It's like, there's this fascinating show in London called Gogglebox. Gogglebox has been on for a while. It's won a lot of BAFTAs. And what it is, normal people in their house watching a television show and Gogglebox records them watching the show.

So they record them watching the show and they make running commentary as any family would watch sitting around and watching any show. So it's some couples, sometimes friends, sometimes whole family, you know, whole families four or five people sitting there. And Goggle Box is really fascinating. Well, 90-day fiance has even jumped on the Goggle Box idea,

and now they have a version of 90-day fiance where other 90-day fiance couples are watching 90-day fiance seasons talking about 90-day fiance. And I caught that one time and I was like, what? Fascinating. I hate too much. It's too much. But it's fascinating.

But I think the upper echelon of 90 day fiance stars, like the ones who have been around for a while and really command the screen, like they're just naturally dramatic and entertaining human beings, they're probably getting 15, 20,000 dollars in episode. I mean, do I ever see any of these people working? What do they do? No, they just take off and go on these retreats. Why can't we be that lucky? Ghosts spend all these money on hotels

for romantic dinners where then they get an arguments and cry. I know. I'm stuck on a shitty farm outside of fucking NoWordsville, Spain because I can't afford a proper hotel room with no air conditioning, no internet, no cell phone service. And these people are at the fucking Ritz and New York City,

you know, worrying, waking up with full makeup faces on at 11 o'clock in the afternoon. It's like, what the fuck is going on here? How is the world fair? It's not fair! Nothing's fair, Chrissy. I don't know, I don't know, I just, I just, I just find it so entertaining, and just want to be a part of it. Like I I wish that I had had this idea when I was

I was getting you didn't you missed out an opportunity Astrid would have been like I know funny thing was it was like season number two or three when I started I met and I said got to watch this program right and in a lot of ways ways, it was a parody of what was going on with Astrid and I. And in a lot of ways, it was unrecognizable to what was going on with Astrid and I. First of all, we didn't do the 90-day visa. We didn't do that program.

But when we met and we were an international love story and we were trying to figure out how we're gonna make it all work, it was very engaging to watch this, knowing that, well, as stressed out as I am about making sure that Astrid gets over here and becomes a citizen, at least I'm not that fucked up. And they stuff not those people, at least I'm not Darcy and young Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Darcy, why you put your boobs everywhere? Everyone sees your boobs. Well you're putting your dick out there, Mr. Hardon, Rock Hard out. Yeah, they think that's how they met, right? They were. Yeah, she was goggling him. Yes. Speaking of goggle box, it was Darcy goggling some 18-year-old Hottie hunk across the ocean. And she has daughters that are like close to his age.

Yes. Yeah, she has daughters that are like 24 now. And he's, I don't know what he is, 32. But anyway,'ll see fascinating tell Jeff give Jeff my apology. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I know you don't listen to I know you don't listen to the show, but I'm hoping that someone will tell you that Brian Apollogies do you for all the bad television currently running around in your house I have to mention this because I think it's the story of the week. Maybe of the month. We'll see how the rest of the month goes, but it's early. So we'll see how it goes. Did you read about the Atlanta, the Barcelona flight that had to be turned around? I did. It's everywhere. About an hour and a half into the flight because

about an hour and a half into the flight because diarrhea. I have a bad case of diarrhea. Have you ever seen that? The Japanese commercial? For, it's like an English translation service. They're trying to teach you how to speak English, right? So it's like an info-merchal. And there's three Japanese ladies. And they're doing this like whole dance

of like putting their hands over their butt. And it's like, I need a bathroom because I have a bad case of diarrhea. I have a bad case of diarrhea. It's the funniest thing, the internet always wins. But I can't even fathom. I thought Delta was the good airline. I can see this happening on jet brown, jet blue,

jet brown. Oh, yeah. Well, it's not Delta's fault. Southwest or something? I mean, don't they screen for that shit? Screen for diarrhea. Yes, screen for diarrhea. Hey, you got the right.

Wow, everybody's responsible for your own diarrhea control or not, or you don't get on the plane. I just don't understand it. Yeah. What under what circumstances do you have to shit all over the plane? First of all, what are the mechanics of this? They won't even say if it's a man or a woman.

No, they're keeping that secret. And you know what? They should. Yeah, they should because it's just an accident. Obviously, I'm making it funny, but it's an accident. And of course, accidents do happen. But the entire plane was filled with food. Well, that's what they...

I'm picturing it. It seems like maybe they were getting on and maybe their seat was towards the back. I just, they just kind of did the shuffle. They just kind of did the whole way back. I don't know. I think they were sitting in first class and decided to drop a bomb in the coach

because they didn't want to embarrass themselves. And so they did the diarrhea shuffle all the way back. But what are the logistics of this? Is this a man that's dripping diarrhea all the way down his jeans, or is this a woman who has a skirt on? I just want, I'm just fascinated to know what exactly was seen and heard on this plane.

But the, if you, Can I imagine the smell? Oh my God. You, I can imagine the smell too because I have 12 to 14 children who have diarrhea, one of them has diarrhea all the time. But I have never in my life experienced such gut-busting diarrhea that I would actually shit myself.

Like, I would know ahead of time. I mean, the only way I can think about it is if you were violently ill. I had salmonella. Yeah. And you know what, to be fair, I wasn't thinking about a plane ride at that time. No, you were in hell. I was thinking about a 12 12 hour plane ride to Barcelona. I was thinking and that's a crazy part is that they were headed to Barcelona.

They were on a nine hour flight. So they only got an hour and a half into it and thank God they only got an hour and a half into it because can you imagine that guy or girl had diarrhea the entire time? It was just running up and down the halls. No. And can you imagine sitting next to the person who just shat themselves? It clearly is a, I think the pilots and the staff on board made a clearly intelligent decision

and a common sense one. We got to turn this plane around. We can't get there like this. The ATC, the air traffic control tape that I listened to. I saw the transcript. You can, there's a couple of websites where they record all of this stuff, all the public ATC stuff, and I listened to it because of course it's one of the most listened to things now on these websites, but I listened to it.

And the pilots who usually the rule is, because I've flown exactly two times, because I actually took control of an airplane once or twice, the rule is short, sweet, and to the point, do not use any extra words. There's a lot of people talking to air traffic control, you got to make, you got to be concise and clear. But this guy goes, uh, Atlanta, this is Delta 1303. Uh, Delta, and the guy was like, Delta 1303, go ahead.

We're gonna need to turn around and come back to it. Lance and now, are you declaring an emergency? Uh, no, not, not an emergency per se, but we do have a biohazard situation on board. Delta 1, 3, go, 3, can you repeat that please? Yes, biohazard situation on board that please yes bio hazard situation on board like a biochemical situation on board like a bio diaria situation on board clearing all traffic are you clearing all lanes it's like they cleared the sky

we have fire trucks with diarrhea foam on the tarmac ready for you sir we're getting ready to spray down that ass. Get him out. Did they use the, do you think they use the slides? Oh no, because it was a two aisle plane. So they could go out. Oh my God. It's slides. It's slides.

If they had video, we could identify the person by the brown street just going down the slide. Oh right. Maybe they use the slides just for that person. Oh my God, I would have, I would have wrapped that dude in bubble tape. I put a put them in the car go hold. I really would have, I would have told him to stay in the bathroom for right now. Just stay in the bathroom while we land.

Yeah. I don't care that there's no seat belt in there. If someone's gonna die, it's gonna be you. We're just gonna go this poor bastard. Oh God, I know. Poor bastard day, whatever, whichever it is. Basterd is. Basterd is, whichever it is, they know who they are.

You know who you are, you know what you did. Like, for the rest of their lives, they are going to have to think at night when they're going to sleep about the plane that had to turn around because they should. They may not get on a plane again. I mean, that's devastating. They had to have been violently ill. Now, I'm concerned if I'm on the plane that had to turn around because they should they may not get on a plane again i mean that's devastating they had to have been violently now i'm concerned if i'm on the plane that i'm going to be violently ill you have to keep the diaries stopper around yeah that

i keep that peto visible i have a bad case of diadia well at least everybody's taking it stride seems like everybody who's on the plane who's now made a video because, of course, this is your 15 minutes of fade that you're on the diarrhea plane. The brown express flight to Barcelona. The brown Barcelona express. Um, we're flying Barcelona brown. From the flight, I guess you were an ass out there, so I named something. So I left this person back in relax and just a reminder if you're going to

shoot yourself please use the boot bag given to you in the front thanks for flying brown brush and a little happy to your location in about nine and a half hours oxygen masks are provided not in case of an emergency but just as a regular course of business we'll be flying a fifty-five dollars of pre-dark-hounder. I'm not doing it again, I'm not doing it. Oh my god. Poor bastard. I really do feel for him. I do too.

Whoever that might be. You think it's going to come out. You think they're going to be identified? I don't. The finger is going to be pointed. I mean, who can really keep a secret that long? Like, there's going to be some miserable sad sack of shit, no pun intended, that's gonna call out the person,

by name or by picture, one of the two. But I hope they don't, because honestly, this is just an accident. Yeah. It's like if my son threw up all over a plane and there was no control over it. It sounds like this was an adult, doesn't sound. At least that's the way they make it sound.

And who knows, could have been an older person, could have been a sickly person, could have been a person that has IBS. Yes. Yeah, IBS airlines. Fly the friendly skies with IBS airlines. You could sit and comfort with the rest of you. IBS, no problem.

IBS, no problem. Bubblegut, come on by. We got you covered. There's literally holes come out in our seats. It just flies out the back of the plane. Did you know that they used to just like, dispose of that shit in the air? That's what would happen.

You'd be hanging out on their sunny day, and just brown around, just flying all around. I think they did it mainly over oceans, lakes and prairie land, but you know, they Matthews one time did it. That's right. The Chicago River. That is the most insane story to me still is why anybody would just pull over to the river and then just dump shit into the Chicago River when a passenger boat, like a tourist boat was driving under the bridge. They literally got shed on by Dave Matthew. I mean, it wasn't bad enough.

Dave's music wasn't bad enough. Then they had to shit all over the tourist in Chicago. That is very weird that that happened to right. Yeah, he's a new whole new new whole new meaning to the DMB. Ha, ha. Thanks. Ha. Ha.

The dump Matthews band, here we are. How come, man, they have like, do they have hookups for shit like that? I guess. That's what we think. For, since I met, the day that I met Astorin, we, you know, or since we Astorin and I started talking about children,

which was like, you know, two weeks into knowing each other. We were full on and talking about kids. I said, I really wanna take, if we ever have kids, I really wanna take them on a cross-country trip. That would be so fun. And he's super nice RV. Yeah, I still wanna do that.

I know, I think that'd be so much fun. And not that we would necessarily spend every night in the RV, maybe we could stop at night and stay at some local, yokel motel for hotel, but how cool would it be when you're going to drive that far, go cross country, you know, it takes whatever, it would take two full days if we just drove straight through, but then you stop everywhere. But if you, the kids and the family could run around the back and watch TV and play card games and make sandwiches and you know, they have a bed that someone could take a nap in,

I think that would just be so cool. I also want a driver because I don't want to be the one driving. But I just think that would be so cool. But you have to remember, and then I think to myself, and the best part is that the kids can just use the bathroom right there. We don't have to stop every time the kids have to use the bathroom. But you never go number two in the bus. You never do it. That's just a thing. We were traveling to Disneyland

in Europe. We took the kids for their birthday because we were there and we just decided, okay, that they like Disney will take them. And they have this bus that takes you from the airport to Disneyland because it's, it's, they say it's in Paris, but it's not really in Paris. It's like an hour outside of Paris. So the Paris, the city of Paris probably doesn't have room to put that. No, the city of Paris. Millions of years or whatever long they've been there. Well, not only does the city of Paris not have room, they don't have patience for Disney. Like, I don't know if you remember, but Disneyland Paris was quite the flop for the first 12 years of its existence

because Disney and their infinite wisdom as a American corporation decided that what the French people really wanted was the American Disney culture in France, but that's not what they wanted. They hated it, they were like, fuck that. We don't want America here in France, we like France, we want French stuff.

And so only when Disney started getting hit to this many years after opening, people actually start coming to the park. Literally empty for like the first decade. So anyway, so we get on this bus. Me, the 12 children, family, and laws. We're like taking a half the bus. The second that this guy gets on the highway,

the second he gets on the highway, we are stuck in jam-packed traffic, getting outside, driving outside of Paris. And one of my sons goes, one of my sons. I gotta go poo poo. I gotta go poo poo. And I'm like, oh, shit.

God damn it, I told you to go in the airport. I told you. Now I'm my dad, right? Now all of a sudden I'm my dad. I'm like, fuck that. I told you to go in the airport, I told you. Now I'm my dad, right? Now all of a sudden I'm my dad, I'm like, fuck that. I told you to go poo-poo. And I gotta go poo-poo, I gotta go poo-poo. Well guess what? There is no place to poo-poo because they have a toilet,

but the toilet is broken. And so I run them to the bus driver and I'm like, hey, is it like really broken or like kind of broken? Like, is it a broken? And he of broken? Like is it a broken? And he's like, no number two, no number two, right? And I was like, fuck. And he's like, no poo poo, no poo poo. You can hear us.

So I'm like, well, I guess you're gonna have to wear one of your sister's dives. Dives. Dives. And then we put it in like a biohazard bag wrapped it up. And just the thought of it sitting near me. That was just like so stressed out the whole trip. Like, fuck, man. Fuck. So the first thing we do when we get to Disneyland Paris is shit all over Disneyland Paris.

I'm like, well, welcome to the hotel Disneyland Paris hotel. Here's my grown son's shit diaper. Smell that Disneyland Paris. You don't wear the odor and I give you shit. There you go. How did they make Disney World Paris French? How do they Frenchify it? They actually got French signs

and French people to work there. They just did stuff that was more customary to the French people. And the food is not cheeseburgers and pizza, right? They actually have local flavors and stuff like that. Fogua. Fogua. No, no, Fogua. Fogua. No, no, Fogua, I did this. Because you know.

Fogua. Yeah, all the. Fogua on the block. Hu ha. Hu no. French Fogua on the block. Hu ha. Hu no.

Disney Land. Fogua on the block. So the, the, I didn't really notice that much of a difference, but you know, because a lot of the rides, some of them are in French, and sometimes they have English, right? But most of the signs are in French. Literally, I don't know this for sure,

but my impression is that when Disneyland Paris opened originally, Michael Eisner, who was the guy who had this idea, the CEO of Disney at the time, he was so convinced that they needed to put Disney World literally in Paris, that like the signs were in English. Well, I think what he thought was everybody would just come and enjoy the American version and the French people really revolted. I mean, they are strongwilled, and they've got a beautiful culture. And any country in the world should,

you know, they should enjoy their own culture. There's nothing wrong with that. They all they asked for was tie a little friendship in this whole American Mickey Mouse bullshit that you're bringing over here. And it just took them a long time to get hip to that. And then they didn't do any, they opened the park with like 12 rides

and they put no more rides in there for like a decade. They would literally open like a, I don't know. You know, one of those rides where you go in, you sit and you watch a movie and they call that a ride, it's not a ride. It's not a ride. But the crazy thing is, and I don't think I ever talked,

I don't think I talked about this back when right after it happened, but the, nutty thing about the French people and Disneyland Paris is that the roller coasters, the things you wanna go on, the thrill rides, the big boy, bad boy thrill rides, as thrill ridey as it's going to get at a Disney park. Those, you will find three and four hour lines for here in the United States

of America. It's those rides that command the most attention that have the longest lines that are hardest to get fast passes for, but it's almost the exact opposite in Paris. You can go on their version of space mountain, which is 50 times more better than the space mountain here. You can go on that ride. We literally went on that ride, like three times in a row. No way out. What's so ever?

However, it's a small world, which is a murderous, non-injoyable, torturous ride that every adult who has been on hates because it's, ta-ta-fee-pe-e pree pree pree pree pree pree That song gets stuck in your head. They have like a 10 hour line for. It's like, why are you waiting for that? Why don't you go and wait in line with us over at Space Mountain?

It was just like a weird cultural thing. I think they just enjoy the, I don't know, sitting in the theater and calling it a ride. I guess I don't know. I didn't really enjoy it myself, but we are so far off topic that it's not even funny. Okay. We had a ride. I guess I don't know. I didn't really enjoy it by myself. But we are so far off topic that it's not even funny. Oh, okay. We got a topic.

We had a topic. And it does have to do with international love. You know, we talk about 90 day fiancee. We've talked about it a lot on this show because of my own personal inclin- my own personal tastes and inclination to watch bad and tell reality show television. But there is a real big business out there bringing two people together from international

countries. You said yesterday that there was okay Filipino, like okay, Cupid, but it's okay, Filipino. No, no, it's Filipino Cupid. Yeah, Filipino Cupid, yeah. Okay. So there is big business involved in bringing two international people together to meet for love. There's a big business and there are a lot of imagined.

Just like to bring... Well, the people, what I'm finding though, I do have to interject this, the people that are actually looking for love on these sides. Most of the people that are looking for love are the ones that are looking outside the country. Yes. The people that are inside the country and no money are... The ones looking for international lovers who have money.

Exactly. No, I get what you're saying. The one girl even admitted it on this one I was watching. She was like, look, I'm very poor. I need a rich guy from the US. And can you... There, after watching so many episodes of this show, and now having been through it myself,

having an international love that trust me was not based on money because I don't have any. So, that's what I'm looking for. But can you... Well, as you guys were mutually introduced by mutual friends? Yeah, it wasn't like some weird, I'm stalking you on Instagram, and now let's go read in some far-flung location,

or some weird dating service, international dating service. This was a personal introduction. We were basically family and didn't know it until we actually met. So now I'm fucking my family. Not blood, not blood. No, not blood family. You know, the kind of second cousin fuckers that happen in Utah with those people.

You know what I'm talking about? The cousin fuckers. Um, there's another episode on Spotify, demonetized. Ha ha ha. Um, what I don't blame somebody for running to pull themselves up out of like soul crushingcrushing poverty in any way. Absolutely. Not as exactly where they're coming from.

And they've got the internet. They've got a phone that they're beautiful because the time it's a woman that's in another country. And yeah, they're going to try and get make themselves make their life better. If you can, if you've got, if you're living in, I don't know, let's say Ukraine or Russia or one of the former Russian states. Or the middle of Amazon, that's what,

that's right. What that one, Karini. Karini. She literally lives in the poorest places on earth, off the Amazon river in the middle of nowhere. And there are even, there are people that are even in more dire circumstances than been in more recent episodes. But what's clear to me is that while this may have started

as a look for a way out, in some cases, it turned into a true love story. Of course, yes. Because I guess you can kind of fall in love with anybody if your mind is open to that kind of interaction. And is there anything wrong with two consenting adults making an arrangement based on the facts as they know them? In other words, I have money.

I'm well established in the United States. Even someone who makes $30,000 a year, is that so much better off? Right. Then someone living on the Amazon, if that's what they want. There are plenty of people living the Amazon. I'm sure that are happy with their eyes.

They want that. But I don't think there's anything wrong with this kind of arrangement. I just want to say that before we get started in this journey of, you know, mail order brides, so to speak, quote unquote. What's up? Hey, yeah, excuse me.

I've been trying to reach you about your car's extended warranty. I'm just kidding. It's me, Christina, producer for's extended warranty. I'm just kidding. It's me, Christina, producer for the Commercial Break, and I just wanted to interrupt for a quick sac to remind you that TCPpodcast.com is the place to go to find all of our audio and video, and of course to beg you to go to Apple and leave us a positive review, positive. And if you go to TCPpodcast.com, you can get a free What Would Frankie Do sticker. Just go to the website, click Contact Us, tell us you want to sticker and give us your physical

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So, a couple of years ago, I watched a dead documentary called Love Me. And that documentary is all about the flourishing Russian mail order bride business. And the people who set these folks up and the people who set them up for success and then set them up for failure. There's a rather, I say famous, but it's really infamous dating service that's out there. And they did a whole documentary about this. It's called Love Me. I'd like to watch it with you. I'd like you to love me

while we're watching this documentary together. If you could give me a hand shandy under the table while we're talking, it would be appreciated. I'm not asking for a lot. Just a rub of the knob. Are you going to HR? The HR department is my wife, so we are fucked. I am fucked. the HR department is my wife, so we are fucked. I am fucked. Love me is a documentary about Russian mail order brides. I'm strolling on the internet. As you do. As I do like to do, and this documentary, I watched part of it,

a couple of years ago, popped back up on my feed. Of course I did, because I was looking for another Russian mail order bride. But let's watch objectively objectively and let's see what we see that either peaks are interest or puts a red flag in the situation. Okay. You ready? Yes. Okay, here we go.

Love me. Oh, and by the way, I just want to share before we get started with this. Say that you love me. It needs me. It needs me. Say that you love me. That's on this part of my head. I hate that song so much. Is that garbage? No, that's not garbage, is that? Make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, make me, won't me, won't me, come on in, won't me, one song, one song.

That's all you hear from us. They're timing was bad. So was their music, but that's okay. I digress. Sorry, cardigans. I just didn't like that song. All right, here we go. Russian male Lord of Brides.

Love me. Oh, I wanted to say this. I totally forgot what I was going to say. We are going to do this. And I think we're going to watch a good chunk of this television program here. So if you want to stick it, stick around, I think we might have a couple episodes of this. So stick around, and if you don't like it tune in next week. That's a very simple question, but what is it love? Oh, people try to define that for the longest time. Love is when one guy pays another woman to move to America and services every need.

I'll mention this, there are like four main guys in this story. They are all white middle aged men who have been through either never had a relationship or who have been through a few. Nice and just know they're going to she's going to be there for you. Is that feeling of I can't live without her? Don't want to live without her. You want to be with her. That's creepy.

It was the way you felt. Is that feeling of you got to kill somebody if they don't want to be with you? You know that feeling, don't you? Nope, you don't. You can't live without her. My psychiatrist says I should keep those thoughts in my cell.

Take care of someone. Be close with someone. If I'm finding someone, you can be compatible with and be committed to. But you're nuts. Which you can't see if you're not watching on youtube.com slash the commercial break is that this is the beginning of the movie, so they're interspersing these guys that are talking and answering the question what is love with these weird Images of this very young girl. I mean she she's probably 15 years old. Yeah popping out of a wedding cake in a full wedding dress I imagine this is the director's daughter or something has to be right? Yeah. I think I could do movie scoring. Hoorayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy I do want to be married, so I'd got a look at the internet, and of course, you know,

you can find anything on the internet. My name is Travis Needham from Plain Wisconsin, 30 years old. So how many times do you know today? I have to point out that I don't think that the women where he is looking for love from are picturing mud, mud pit. No, on their dream board at their home, wherever they live, at their dream board, they probably have like Brad Pitt, George Clooney, you know, whatever.

Beautiful home. Beautiful home with a pool, New York City Miami, San Francisco, maybe even Charlotte, you know, I mean like something that my expectations are high. I just want civilization and what he's are gonna get with this's more than a lot more than a lot of them. I haven't really dated a lot of girls. You think he's ever had sex with one of those guys? That's the first thought that came from my mind. I thought the same thing. Did you?

Yeah. So the answer is yes. Probably. Probably not. Did you? Yeah. So the answer is yes. Probably. Probably not. Why not? Then one and. Let's just leave it.

Where are all the women at this town? There's a lot of guys. I could think of six single women off the top of my head and probably most are divorcing. We're all here at work ethic. I wouldn't take it as a... You don't have time. Personal things. Just there's not a lot of women in this.

Well, who wants to live there? Yeah, I mean, think about it. Like your single, young, beautiful, you got your college education, or maybe you're going off to college, would you want to live in dairy farm Wisconsin? No. That's the problem. That's part of the challenge with farms these days and why farms are increasingly being owned by corporations or hedge funds or whatever or one family owns all the farms now because who the

fuck wants to work this land it's a rather isolating and stressful and you never stop fucking work and you think those cows care that it's a holiday? No, they don't. Sorry, you're gonna die. Don't die on a holiday. That's all I'm asking. It was like living with the escalol, you know? It was kind of the... Meeting someone from overseas, I felt like if I could meet the right one,

that she might be more serious about actually building a relationship and giving it the time we would need. My name is Eric Irton, I'm a mechanical engineer. I live in San Antonio, Texas. I'm 45. What's your favorite gun? What's your favorite gun? Yeah, you don't hear that all the time.

No, that's not usually a question you would ask in a romantic interlude. What's your favorite gun? By the way. You're sharing a shirt that says NRA. Yeah, okay, what's your favorite gun? By the way. He's very sure that it says NRA. Yeah, okay, that's all different story. Okay, so you know that woman that Eric has been is pictured with or that he's pictured. Himself with.

Yeah, himself with. It's a beautiful, sexy, blonde, that age 22, that clearly these two are as ill-fidget. He's a tank top leaning against a tree. Here's another one. age 22 that clearly these two are a hell fit. Leaning against a tree. Here's another one. 45 years old, looks 62 years old. I shouldn't talk too much shit. He's in the NRA, but as guns, one of them is his favorite.

But this guy is not typically who you would picture that girl with. Got any favorite gun? I don't know. It's hard to have a favorite. Two feet seven magna. The first hand gun I bought. Got my 12 gauge shotgun.

8K 47. AR 15. A little 22 caliber with a 20 gauge shotgun over under. Don't even know what any of that means. I don't even know what that means. Yeah, and can you imagine if you're the wife and you actually make it so far as to come back with this guy and that's what you see?

Yeah, then you have a closet full of guards. Yeah, of which you have a favorite. Yeah, he does. Like, I'm all about responsible gun ownership, 1,000 to percent. And it doesn't sound like he's being your response. Well, I'm not saying that, but it's a little creepy that you have your guns laid out on the bed and you're picking your favorites. What was your last serious relationship? Like, here.

I've never had one. Geez. I tried the army and a few of these other regular dating sites. Never worked for it. Regular dating sites. The army. Is the army, is the army of people? I tried the army. Fuck. Am I too old for the army?

I'm too old for the army. I just learned the other day I'm too old for the army. Did you know that? I did not. But they only take people up to 24 years old and I just, my birthday just passed so I'm out. My name is Bobby Cannon. I'm 46 and I work in human resources for the federal government and my views are

Mind alone not the government So well, I mean at least he's got a head enough on his shoulders to see Oh, he's got a cat though. He's got a cat looking lovingly in it. Yeah, that's sweet. This is a living room This is where I spend most of the day. It's where I do most of my masturbation On this couch. Looking at army photographs. When I'm at home, I've got some of my collection. I tend to be a little bit shy,

so I don't meet a lot of folks for relationship purposes. And to be honest, I'm a little bit heavier so that is something that is his problem what's that i don't know the it's not his problem people find love at all different sizes you know i watch that uh... that that show my big fat fabulous life came back on that wait me lady she's she's rocking almost four hundred and there guys falling all over

oh yeah falling all over. Oh, yeah falling all over her Is a real negative in the United States Now she's famous in his own television show, but I digress I Hate it dating I got on your popular sides and my first five days Last of less than five minutes all five Well, what does that say about you dude? I was gonna say who ended it. Yeah, are you yeah? That's in five minutes. I had some pretty terrible tender dates

But I survived the night. Yeah, you know what I'm saying? I made it a couple of hours Of course I had to get one of them out of a tree. It took me a little while I could the other one off my cock But besides that it was all great. I'm Ron Kirby. I'm from North Carolina in Pinehurst. I married my child her sweetheart. Matter when she was 12, I was 13, got married at 18, three kids by 26. We were married for 28 years.

If there was one thing missing in our marriage, it was this. I felt taken advantage of it. Oh, you poor you. And now you're taking shots? Yeah, he's in the darkness. Oh, testoster. Testoster. Probably, yeah.

I got frustrated with American women. So if I typed in a Google, something about Russian brides. Something about Russian brides. I'm warning about Russian brides. It's just, I am handsome and awesome and would like a Russian bride to suck on my penis most days and not talk back to me at all because I am the American version of a Russian stud.

Go, Google. There it came up. Welcome to the fascinating world of a foreign affair, where true love knows no boundaries. My name is John Adams, president of a foreign affair, and I would like to thank you for taking the time to learn more about this exciting and very real process of finding your special someone. Well, with a pitchman like that, how can he stop?

Didn't get some of those real estate people in there. I can't get it some polish. That guy looks like he's about to fall asleep. You look at John Adams, and John, if you're looking at this, don't get him out of me, but he's an average guy. He, in the best looking guy in the world, he's got a little bit of a pooch, like he said. And yet, it would work for him.

This is what happens to these guys, some of these gentlemen who get a little bit older and then like Frankie B types. This is a Frankie B type, right? It's a little bit older, finds a second win, discovers steroids, you know, starts eating right, divorces wife, bitter at everybody, bitter at every woman that ever came in as like,

five minute dates, five minute dates. That's fucking bullshit first of all. Five dates, five minute dates. That's fucking bullshit, first of all. Five dates, five minutes, all of them, I don't believe it. I just don't. But the problem is that they get a little heady, right? And they start finding all the faults in everybody else. True. You're no better looking than the guy on that thing.

You just have a little bit more muscle that has been given to you by the wonderful world of pharmaceuticals. It's not helping you. I was lucky enough to find my Russian bride several years ago with the assistance of a foreign affair. And I assure you that it can work for you as well. So then you have to say if it worked for John,

certainly maybe it could work for me. You don't even think for one minute that John. I don't think for one minute, John has a financial stake and have come of this one way or the other. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Now we're in an office with John and Tanya Adams. Tanya is a Russian mail order bride that John found. John actually, I think he bought the company is what happened. Yes. They are going up to somebody's house, wife. Sick of puppy. A fortifier is really just an international version of any kind of local dating service that you would go to online and we're trying to meet someone. Well, we focus more on the international sector.

The idea to do is find the computers you can register and you can start meeting people from everywhere. Or a bride. I was lucky enough. Yeah. For a hefty dollar. Sir, one shielding, one shielding, to meet your Russian oil bar, one shelling for every digit you type on a text message. It really is. Okay, let's see how it unfolds here.

Metanya, through a form, for you actually. So I'm a great example of how it can work and it does work. What happens when you're lucky enough to me to love your life over your life. Okay, so now John and Tanya are on a video on their website and they're sitting together and behind them are pictures, like a weird green screen of a, I gotta imagine no older than 16 year old girl in a bikini girl in a bikini with water splashing near her vagina and like wedding rings behind them.

This is a weird sales pitch. Yeah. Little slow. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. That coffee goes. I was 27 and when I was 29 I moved to the United States. I came from the United States.

I came from St. Petersburg, Russia. John's saying, it's my first marriage in the year last. It's the second one. The Internet really changed the way we gave both internationally and domestically. When the men do go to this site, they have to register on the site. And then they can start writing letters to the wife. Yeah, you register for free, but then it's like $10 a month. It'll explain this, but yeah, they pay per word to have it translated.

Per word. Per word. Now, I don't know when this documentary was made. I think it was in the early 2000s, mid 2000s. So let's call it 2008, 2009. I think Google Translate has been around about as long as Google has. So wouldn't she just use Google Translate? That's what I did with Astrid, and she knew it right away, by the way. She was like, are you using Google Translate?

Yeah, pay for letters because it will actually translate letters for you and get them to the women and get the replies back for you. I got on the AFA website and I started getting some letters from some women in Ukraine. I really didn't even know what Ukraine was. The women that are just gorgeous found 10 women that I really liked, so I started writing to them all 10 wrote back. We always preach that she'd actually get on a plane and go over and meet these women in person because that's the only way,

anything's ever gonna happen for you, if you want something to happen for you. The romance to her is absolutely amazing. It is absolutely amazing, all the cash and I get in my pocket, no all the pussy I have left over. These poor bastards are paying thousands of dollars. They usually don't find love, but I did. I found love.

I'm the guy with all the money. You can even imagine how he rolls. He's setting all this stuff up. Oh, yes. This, this is a true, like money making racket in the sense that there are always going to be lonely, single guys. Oh, this is the play in on that emotion. That's right, especially in middle age, making racket in the sense that there are always going to be lonely single guys.

I was just playing on that emotion. That's right. Especially in middle age when you're starting to feel your mortality a little bit and maybe your life has passed you by and you haven't done a few things you want to do. Like fall in love, have a family, have kids, and find a person, in this case, women that you can settle down with. So why not pick a beautiful Ukrainian women, which by the way, Ukrainian women are world-class beauties. Like, I don't know.

They're really are. I don't know what's happening. They're something in the fucking water. It's that nuclear power plant or something is growing these beautiful, yeah, Ukraine and Venezuela. They're growing beautiful women down there. And of course, here, north of Atlanta, they're growing beautiful men, like me. It's an experience that you'll ever have. We're going to three separate cities during the trip. Odessa, Nikolai, and here's a song. It starts in New York and JFK.

Everybody's being for the first time. Everybody's kind of sith and everybody else up. It's kind of like a road trip if you're in a fraternity, in a way, but it has a purpose, of course, which a road trip does not. I don't really feel it's like a trip. Road trips have purpose? Yeah, what? Road trips usually have destinations, I assume. I guess it couldn't.

You and I one time went to Bonnaroo, but I just made a big circle with your car for 12 days. My last chance, but I just didn't want to be alone anymore and nothing was happening around here. Why would I spend this kind of money to find a way? There's a lot of faith involved in this. It has to be. Because you're asking me and look, fork over a few thousand dollars, take a couple of weeks out of your schedule and come over with us outlook a flop they flew on you cranium air only the best for foreign affair

tours you're creating air this is obviously before the war that's happening obviously yeah wait before the war that's happening obviously yeah wait before the war so they're walking through an airport either all uh... have landed at in Ukraine and so now they're leaving the airport to realize that Ukraine is called in mucky that's ours that will Yeah, that's ours All right guys We made it they're now on a bus

Welcome to Odessa Ukraine Welcome to Odessa Welcome to beautiful Odessa It's like there's the Russian military invading the port over there. And look, they just bombed the submarine. It's gray and cold. It's gray, cold, dreary. This guy's super happy.

He just spent $10,000 of his milk money, literally. I don't find a wife. Boss, they're kind of looking around out the window and they're like, wow. Wow, there's a little bit of Apprehension a little bit of fear maybe a little bit of all these things going through their minds because there's not the easiest process in the world All right guys, we're gonna get started here with this orientation No social is it's not a cocktail party. It's a great opportunity to meet a lot of different people at one time, right? It's all about moving around as much as possible to try to-

I'm just curious as to why that. So he's in there in a hall of a hotel and it's like this beautiful interior hall. Or Nate's decorations everywhere. It's like what you would expect. I don't know, a world-russian building. There's 12 guys on the tour. There's maybe 20 chairs in the entire room. He's standing right amongst them and he's got a microphone in his hand. It's kind of like Irving's funeral. Did you really need this speaker in the microphone? There's only two of us. Some people might be hard of hearing. It's fair enough. It's Meet as many different people as possible. The first big event of this whole tour is the social enough.

What everybody is looking forward to, so everybody is ready for that. I don't have any expectations. My plans are to shake the hands of every single woman there tonight. I'm wrong. My plan is to have every single woman in there shake my knob by the end of the night. This guy is a fucking...

Yeah, he's weird. ...is we're talking to this guy is the guy who was injecting himself with testosterone during the intro. I've had five minute dates. If five minute dates, that's right. His name is what? Eric was Eric Randy. I can't remember.

Ronald? I am Ron. Ron. And I am Ron. Ron. I am Ron. I am Ron. I am Ron. You guys might go a little tech now. I really want to welcome you all for coming. It's really important that if you see someone that you like, don't be shy. Just go up to him and say, can I talk to you?

I'm not going to talk to you. I'm not going to talk to you. I'm not going to talk to you. I'm not going to talk to you. I'm not going to talk to you. I'm not going to talk to you. I'm not going to talk to you. I'm not going to talk to you.

I'm not going to talk to you. I'm not going to talk to you. I'm not going to talk to you. I'm not going to talk to you. I'm not going to talk to you. I'm not going to talk to you.. It's really important that if you see someone that you like, don't be shy. Just go up to the side and you can talk to him. I guarantee you that the men are more shy than you are. It was like being a kid in a candy store. It wasn't really quite sure how to handle it. My job is to go around and create the mess,

be as proactive as possible a kid, and talk to him with many living as we possibly. So my job is to go around and create the mess, create the blackness that's awesome to get, and talk to the many women that they possibly can have a good time at the same time. So case you couldn't hear what he was saying, he says his job as the tour director is to go around and make sure that the men are talking to as many women as possible, so that they have a good time, so that when they inevitably don't have a connection with anybody on this tour, they come on the next tour right because they just want to go to the party We had 210 women at that social 20 guys attend to one ratio

Welcome to paradise For me, it's been very nerve-wracking a lot of beautiful women and Not like that at home They just can't believe that these women are interested in them, because they're used to the situation at all. We're nobody's interested in them. American boys, all these women just falling all over these old white men. But it's crazy.

They're like, it's working on the one guy. Yeah, they're, twerking. They're literally sitting on his face on stage. There's 210 of them and they're fighting for 12 guys' attention. That's a 10 to one ratio, like the guy said. It's insane. I guess can you blame the guys at this point? Yeah.

And you know, the girls get free drinks and free food to show up and no possibility that they may need someone that they would have a relationship with. Of course. And up in America, I guess, for a better life. I'm not sure. These women believe in family first, that career first, family first, I'll tell you, it's like dating a girl from the 50s, it's like dating my mom. Oh, well, that's super creepy and there he is with his shirt off. He's got his shirt off and there are women dancing on top of him,

like sitting on his face. He's stroking him. He's just. And he's the tour director. He's the guy, you know, he's been to all of these parties. So he knows exactly what to do. He's like, you know what? Just get naked.

It's going to take after the tour director get on stage take your shirt off take your penis out for all God's sake and just see what happens Crazy out there. This is one wild fucking party. Wow I've been trying to be realistic in my search. I'm pretty good shape for my age But I can certainly feel my age in the last three years Okay but I can certainly feel my age in the last three years. Would you like to dance? Okay. No, not really.

I also want to still love me for me, you know, when I'm not as viral when I am sort of a... No, I think it's viral. It's viral. And that is viral. It sounds like you need a test. It sounds like you need a test. It sounds like you need results. Or part.

You know, I wouldn't mind falling apart with someone. That's shit. My name is Ron. My name is Cindy. So you speak English and how old are you? It was sacred. Well, that's important. Yes, yes. You never ask a woman her age and then don't push her on the subject first of all, but at least

Ron is taking kind of a level-headed approach for a guy all steroid it up. At least he's taking a level head and who has had five, five minute dates in the last year. He's taking a level-ended approach in one sense, in the sense that I don't want a 20-year-old hottie because I'm gonna get old and then she's not gonna have anything to do with me because she doesn't live the same life that I do. Right.

Fuck, I'm fucked. If they're 25 years younger than me, then they're not gonna be falling apart with me. S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S- five years younger than even, they're not gonna be falling apart with me. Sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss little English and I speak no Russian, it was just instant sparks. For name's Victoria, we met at the social, danced for a while, talked for a while, never left your side until late next afternoon, the goal of hotel freshen up and back to spend more time with it. Late the next afternoon. That makes afternoon.

Wow, good for him. And the video said 2011. So I guess at least we're in that like, I'm gonna call it 10 to 2013 range. In a perfect world. I think, of course he's like, great. What did I do with anything? I'm not sure, I don't know.

Just sharing, just sharing my weird thoughts. I'm like I'm looking at a archeological dig or something. I'm gonna place the time on this, sometime around 2010 to 2013, apparently an italian. Yeah. Well, Brian, it says 2011 right there. Well, I wasn't wrong, was I?

They gave me the date and I still gave a range. I was like, I'm gonna place this sometime between 2010 to 2013. It says that happened on December 12, 2011, it's 706 PM. Well. Still in the rain. Still in the rain.

Not wrong, am I? That's where I'm placing it. Yeah, that's where I'm placing it. That's where I put it in my head. That's what it last me with time it was, at what time it is. And I'll be like, it's 7 p.m. It'll really be 6.42, right?

And she's like, it's 6.40. And I'm like, it's kind of 7 p.m. You know what I'm saying? Jeff does the same thing. I know, what does it matter? What does it matter? It's, you know, because it is 6.42 and not 7. I know, but rocket ships aren't taking off

based on what I tell you. I guess that account out at NASA. This would just keep going as awesome and wonderful as it's been. And if it keeps going in the direction that it is, I plan on being engaged before I leave. This cow farmer looks like super not exciting. He looks like so nervous. I know. Well, she's beautiful and also she's going to be very disappointed in the farm. I know. She can be very disappointed, but let's even see if he gets that far. Okay guys, I'm glad to see that you all survived the death so far. So now that you have one social under your balance, you have a better idea how to manipulate

and maneuver in the social. In Nicaragua. Take your shirt off, hold down your boxers, let them go. A nightclub, it's called the ocean. When a day that you know, that could be appropriate. Guys have fun with it. And hopefully you're gonna find that one woman that you can really connect with. So wait, they just drive from town to town, have you party? Yeah, they're going three different towns.

You know, they're probably putting up posters around town. Oh, of course. Great American men coming to town. It's like the circus. And that's why they're not in Kia right now. They're in like some random ass city. I don't know. Ukrainian, you know, I'm not a Ukrainian map expert, but I would imagine these are small towns. I mean, they're talking to the girls and the girls aren't even in yet. They got the coats to them.

I want the socials to be a bit better. They're veterans now. They're not working anymore. They know what they're doing. I mean, the beginnings of another school how do they do that? Did you see that? There are so many girls in this dark night club with all these disco balls around and

half the girls are belly dancers it appears they're doing a belly dance for the guys. I've been to, oh, and there's a few guys mixed in there too. In a case you want to make that a try. Yeah, you haven't done so well on the, uh, though dating sites in America. Try a guy. Six different trips and by walking into the social, of course I'm always uncomfortable, because there's a lot of people in that room

and there's a lot of beautiful women in that room. Six times. Six fucking times. Six. He's just addicted to the parties. Yeah. Well, I mean, you can see why? Yes.

They're crazy. They're nuts. You have 200 women. For every one guy and they're all half naked and they're, they want you for whatever reason That's intoxicating I can imagine yeah, but this guy's still uncomfortable after party number two I would be perfectly fun. I need my British fluffer. You're amazing Stoppiness, that's what I'm gonna call you now

Hardest part for me is just starting with the first one. And I take my interpreter and we start walking the room. They're sitting at this table by herself is a very tall, beautiful girl with long blonde hair. Oh, Eena is her name. So now we introduce Ena. I'm Ena, I'm a quadruple. Her name is Ena, she lives in Poltava.

She's sharing that Eric, this guy has used it and came up and used a translate. All of the criteria that I kind of went on this trip with... Houston came up and used a translate What is that tall blonde? Yeah, blonde tall tall blonde Yeah, но что-то там. А ты же saying, что ты чё, когла, что-то не в ней тортал? Да, что ты чё, когла, потому что он очень очень тортал. И он действительно интересный, в том, что это может быть, что он может быть. Такие люди, которые уже не уйти в неделю, эти паши, эти паши, они не думают, что они великие,

и они все-таки они действительно просто великие, и все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки,таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все-таки, все- все-таки for years and years. And then all of a sudden, they're really just exploring it all over again. I wanna go like you. Yeah. Oh, what's up, boy? I'm having a meeting. And you, I wanna go like you. Who wants a boy like me? Ha, ha, ha. And I'm skeptical on this.

Okay, 60-year-old guy's wearing Amber Cromby and Fitch sweaters. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Amber Cromby and Fitch sweaters. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Amber Cromby and Fitch boxers, they're comfortable, I understand that. Sweaters, not so much. Having talked to some of the translators here, when I've asked them, tell me what percentage of the women here are truly in their heart interested in finding a man being married. I mean, they're giving me some really low numbers. You have to be children. Of course, because these women,

some of these women aren't really interested in being married, they want a party. They want a party. They get free booze, free food. Some of them might get paid to show up. You never know what these guys are up to. Okay, I'm looking for someone with no children. I've certainly not met anyone age-appropriate for me.

Five. Shilling away the camera. He was asking her questions and he shoved away the camera. He's serious. Yeah, he's serious, serious asshole. You've now survived two socials. I congratulate all of you for going to the third and final social here in here song. It's gonna be over before you know it. Nothing really matters. Just go up, talk to whoever you want to talk to, make something happen.

I mean, you know, don't sit there and be shy. You just go up and do it because you probably never see her again. Anyway, she looks in the Ukraine. This is your opportunity. This is it. Fair enough, that's a good point. You know, it's a good point for those of us who are anxiety-wise about new social situations. You're never gonna see these women again anyway, and you can't understand that they're talking shit about you

because they speak a different language, so why not? It's the last city, and I'm down to one. To be honest, this is probably the one that my eye always came back to. Her name is Julia. She works in a travel agency. Incredibly beautiful. We've been writing travel agency.

Oh, travel agency. She's probably in Hoodwinks with the foreign affair people. Right. To each other for, it's gotta be seven, eight months now. Well, me, at the social, I'm coming to basically try to sweep her off her feet. Do you have pictures of her? What have you been talking about?

Yeah, what? Like the travel arrangements for. Or, or, love. Do you want to fly a diarrhea delta plane? How old is she? 26. She was a little bit under my target age. What was your target age exactly?

27. This is the one from the website where she looks like Angelina Jolie. Oh my God. Yeah. She does. She's pretty good at the Angelina Jolie. Can you go wrong there? Yeah, like it's just a menu.

Yeah, it's a menu. You just choose the woman in order and then she's yours. Order then she shows up in Kiev the next day and then you know, you spend thousands of dollars trying to reach her for whatever reason. Uh huh. Okay, we'll get back to it. I promise now I'm dying to know what happens because we just started the movie and or the documentary, the show, whatever it is. And I know that there's some stuff to be uncovered here.

So my guess is this is all a big scam or not, right? It's one of those could be could be not. Well, that's not into choices. Those are the two choices. When you're flying Ukraine air to find your next wife, MAAAAAAY! Might or might not be involved in a Ponzi scheme. Well, you have to see what happens. Listen, again, I don't have any problem with people who make these kind of arrangements,

as long as both parties are willing, able, and okay, with whatever agreement has been made, who fucking cares? Who cares? Who cares? It's highly unlikely that it's gonna work out for them, but you know, that's not in my business. There's plenty of people that I knew that I met in a bar, or met between friends, or whatever, that things then work out too. So you might as well lay the cards out on the table. It's the way you want to do it. Look at Marlin.

Marlin. Marlin fell in love with that woman because she sent a Porsche to his house. But then he really fell in love with the woman who was behind the Porsche and the big wallet So if it can happen to Marlon, it can happen to them only in Marlon's situation the woman is 102 years old Well last we heard yeah, that's what was going on They got back together and then something happened again. I don't know I'm I'm plugging for a Marlin update But I don't plug too hard. Yeah, because you know when you're going to break up the last thing you want to do is think about content for the commercial break Of what you have no financial stake probably don't listen to and are worried Update question mark. Yeah update really?

update really? T-C-V podcast.com. That's where you go. You'll find out more information about Chrissy and I, all the audio, all the video right there at one location T-C-V podcast.com. And you can get your free, what would Frankie do, Sticker? Hit the contact us button. Please do us a favor, send us your physical address and out the door we will send you a sticker.

There's only a couple left. We might even be out at this point, who knows when this runs. I don't know, but we'll get you a sticker. Ask for a sticker. 1-855-TCB-8383-1855-TCB-8383. Questions, comments, concerns, content ideas, aspirions, mom, send them all there. At the commercial break on Instagram, tcbpodcast on TikTok and youtube.com slash the commercial play. Okay, Chrissy, I guess that's all I can do today. Oh, I think so. But I love you. I love you.

I love you. And best see you. Best see you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I do say, we must say, and'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man