The Commercial Break - Get Me To Bentonville!

Episode Date: June 12, 2025

Ep#777: Many, many people work for Walmart. But only a select few get chosen to attend the annual Walmart Associates Gathering. Bryan wants to know it all! Every. Last. Detail. Post Malone, Camila Cab...ello and Jimmy Fallon led this years festivities. However, it's the after hours activities that have B&K wanting more info. Walmart is now offering podcast recording space. Could this be the "jumping of the shark"? Maybe Walmart just wants more content for the on-site radio stations? Maybe the best comedy podcast ever will be born in the belly of the beast? Plus, the Walmart Shareholders meeting turns into a huge party when regular employees get their turn to celebrate. TCBit: Taint Tent 2.0 now available for Burning Man 25'! Watch EP #777 on YouTube! Text us or leave us a voicemail: +1 (212) 433-3TCB FOLLOW US: Instagram:  ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@thecommercialbreak⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Youtube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠youtube.com/thecommercialbreak⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@tcbpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.tcbpodcast.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ CREDITS: Hosts: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Bryan Green⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ &⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Krissy Hoadley⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Executive Producer: Bryan Green Producer: Astrid B. Green Voice Over: Rachel McGrath TCBits / TCBits Music: Written, Voiced and Produced by Bryan Green To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:02:52 And applications opening soon for next year's Coachella. The teabag teepees will be back. You'll offend everyone in style. On this episode of the commercial break. 2024 starred Lizzo, Backstreet Boys, Peyton Manning, and Robert Downey Jr. Wow. Was like an emcee of the event. Okay. But this year, pop country superstar, Post Malone.
Starting point is 00:03:31 Okay, they're bringing in the big guns. Yes, Post Malone, Noah Khan, Kamiya Cabello, and Jimmy Fallon were in attendance to entertain the good folks of Walmart, starting at 8 a.m. in the morning. It's a day-long celebration where Post Malone is playing for you at 8.15 in the fucking morning. The next episode of The Commercial Break starts now. It's still 30 in the morning! Oh yeah, cats and kittens, welcome back to The Commercial Break.
Starting point is 00:04:15 I'm Brian Green. This is my dear friend and the co-host of this show, Chris and Joy Holdley. Best of you, Chris here. Best of you, Brian. And best of you out there in the podcast universe. How the hell are you? Thanks for joining us. I got some schmutz in my throat. I know, I've had it in mine. Yeah, every time you walk into the studio, you start coughing.
Starting point is 00:04:31 I know. Yeah, maybe it's the studio. Maybe it is. Maybe all the years of wires and God knows what else in here is just, it's time for a change of scenery. It is time for a change of scenery. It is time for a change of scenery. Just let you know that Chrissy and I will soon be doing some in-person recordings with some of our guests, thanks to the good people at Odyssey. Odyssey is our network. They essentially, they handle a lot of stuff on our behalf, but you know, when you're a podcast, you can't do everything, although we
Starting point is 00:05:02 try, you can't do everything. And we try, you can't do everything. And so they do some of the business stuff for us, including find sponsors and put them into the show and all that, but they're wonderful people, all of them. And Odyssey has hundreds of local radio stations across the country, or maybe thousands, I'm not sure. They have one here in Atlanta, and they have offered the use of their studios, their professional studios for Chrissy and I
Starting point is 00:05:25 to host people in person. So we're going to be starting that in July, we'll be in person. And so here's what I wanna say. God, it's been a long time since I've stepped into a radio studio. It's gonna be really weird. It's gonna be really weird.
Starting point is 00:05:42 We got a video last night from one of the operations people. And, uh, yeah, just looking at the video made me feel weird. I know. I'm being honest. No. Because it does, there are some similarities. There's some PTSD there. There is some PTSD there.
Starting point is 00:05:57 I just hope we don't run into anybody we used to work with. I know. Yeah. Like, you two idiots. Well, I think, uh, I think we do know. We have a good friend. Yeah. Okay.
Starting point is 00:06:07 But those people we know and we like, right? I hope we don't run into anybody we don't like. How's that? Yeah. Anybody that made our radio experience so miserable, I hope they're long gone out of this town and not at Odyssey. I don't think they are. But, and the people at Odyssey are great.
Starting point is 00:06:19 So maybe we'll give them a pass if they are with Odyssey. But here's why I bring this up. I think in the future, not anytime soon, but I think in the future, there may be an opportunity for people who live close to see us record in person. So do us a favor, 212-4333-TCB, 212-4333-822.
Starting point is 00:06:37 If you live within an hour of the Atlanta area, let us know and we'll start putting a list together. And if that happens, if it comes to fruition, if we're allowed to do it, if we decide to do it, we'll pull out that list and we'll start emailing. So 212-433-3TCB, let us know you're interested in seeing a live taping of the commercial break. Also, we're going to be doing that on Twitch and Kik. And we'll start that probably in July at some point too.
Starting point is 00:07:02 So stay tuned. Follow us at the commercial break on Instagram, if you would, if you could, if you don't mind. So one of the weirdest things I've seen in podcasting in a long time, I found this morning. I passed it around. This is crazy. And this parlay's into another topic I want to talk about.
Starting point is 00:07:17 So there is a guy here in Atlanta who claims to be the podcast guru, launch your podcast, whatever, with a million and a half Instagram followers. KSATRA But, you know, like, sidetracked just for one second, Chrissy sent me this article the other day and she's like, oh, I guess now they're just telling you where to find fake followers. Chrissy sent me this article that it appeared that it was from the AJC or an adjunct, like, you know, the AJC can own these smaller newspapers around town or business.
Starting point is 00:07:49 Rough draft or something was the name of it. Something. Yeah. And she sends it to me. It takes a keen eye, but you would realize that this is really just an advertorial, which means that it's, it looks like it's a real article, but what it really is, is an advertisement for a service where you can buy fake followers. And it's giving you the pros and cons to buying fake followers.
Starting point is 00:08:08 Like, oh, if you're a business, then juicing your followers could lend some credibility. If I thought that was true, I would have done that a long time ago. No, because fake followers are only going to get you so far. People are going to realize they're fake followers, and then they're not going to want to follow you because you have a bunch of fake followers. I'd rather have 7,000 real followers than 7're fake followers and then they're not gonna want to follow you because you have a bunch of fake followers. I'd rather have 7,000 real followers than 7 million fake followers. I mean, let's be real, I'd rather have 7 million any followers but I'd rather have 7,000 real followers because at
Starting point is 00:08:34 least we know that you know they're out there somewhere and you know it is what it is. Okay, we have 7,000 followers. So pathetic. Tens of thousands, tens of thousands, hundreds of thousands of listeners, and only 7,000 of them could see fit to go to Instagram, which I know you have, to go to Instagram and press follow. Please do that. And that's the only way you're going to find out if we do special stuff like live recordings at Odyssey or on Kick or Twitch. So go follow us, please. And I know some of you have done that over the only way you're gonna find out if we do special stuff like live recordings at Odyssey or on Kick or Twitch. So go follow us, please.
Starting point is 00:09:07 And I know some of you have done that over the last couple of weeks and I appreciate that. Thank you very much. Okay. So, I find this guy who's got a million and a half followers doing podcast launches. And he has reposted someone from Franklin, Tennessee, another podcaster, walking into her local Walmart. And just like I found casinos at my local Kroger,
Starting point is 00:09:31 she found a podcast studio. Like a real studio, like real studios. And they have these all around the country, by the way. There's nothing new about 4 Rent Podcast Studios. A lot of people have them. They're studio spaces, couple microphones, couple cameras, table chairs, whatever. Yeah, a lot of people do them with the shared works. But now they have one at a Walmart in Franklin, Tennessee, which is just crazy to me. There has to be some angle here from Walmart.
Starting point is 00:10:06 There has to be some angle. I don't know what it is. I will, but I don't know what it is. I don't know why they're involved. Is it just, I'm just renting the space from my local Walmart, or is this Walmart is putting their hands on this because they see some value in having their own podcast network? I'm not sure what it is. because they see some value in having their own podcast network.
Starting point is 00:10:25 I'm not sure what it is. I hate to say never, but it's highly unlikely, Chrissy, that we will ever be showing up to a Walmart to do our podcast recording. That is insane. Now, if you live in Franklin, Tennessee, which is right outside Nashville, right, and you have limited access to equipment that you need to Franklin, Tennessee, which is right outside Nashville, right, and you have limited access to equipment that you need to do a podcast, I guess you could go rent the studios. By the way, they're for rent.
Starting point is 00:10:51 You have to pay for it. You don't just walk in and do a podcast. You have to book the time and rent it. But they have some pretty legit looking technology. Like it doesn't take a lot to make a podcast. Look, look at this. Look at me. You think I figured all this out on my own because it was hard? No, because it's easy.
Starting point is 00:11:10 But it's just beyond me why Walmart has decided to get into the podcast game. Are they going to run podcasts like they run Rachel in the middle of their stores? I mean, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, probably not because they would need to filter what people were saying. Yeah, but there's lots of podcasts out there that are pretty... But I guess you're right. I mean, anybody could take objection to anything. Yeah, yeah, so probably not.
Starting point is 00:11:33 But, you know, like I pointed out, hey, if you need a wire, you're right there. Yeah, if you need to... If you need anything, you're right there. If you need to put together a Western Union telegram, you're right there. If you need a quart of oil for your car, you're right there. Cheap Tupperware, you got it. No problem. Mile seven. So you could, you know what, Chrissy? We could get an oil. We got a quart of oil, cheap Tupperware, and episode number 1,600 of The Commercial Break, all in one trip. I'm going to meet you there. And you're out of the house, right? That's true. So, yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:05 Ah, yeah. Actually, the commercial break will now be exclusively recorded at Walmart in Franklin, Tennessee. You know what the thing is, for a place like, for a show like the commercial break, it actually might not be a terrible idea to go to the Walmart, because we'd probably have content for days just watching people walk in and out of the Walmart.
Starting point is 00:12:29 Yeah, that's true. We'd get guests that were crazy to come in the door. We just pick the characters, just pick them, pull them in. Yeah. They sit with us for 15 minutes. Someone's going to think of this idea, the people of Walmart podcast at Walmart. Yeah. There's an idea. I gave it to you, go forth and prosper.
Starting point is 00:12:47 Because our logo Walmart doesn't have that yet, not to my knowledge. I think they only have one in Franklin, Tennessee. It's just insane to me. It's just insane to me. I went to Walmart, I don't know what it was, a week ago or something, I went to Walmart. You know, I'm not high on my horse to Walmart. Me too. I'm not high on my horse about Walmart. They provide cheap groceries and other sundries in one location that's very accessible for the middle class,
Starting point is 00:13:16 lower middle class. I thought the same thing because I hadn't been in one in a long time and I had to go the day we were doing our endless day. I ran over, I needed to get a light bulb and some gardening soil and a couple of other miscellaneous things and they were all in one place. You can get it all right there. So Walmart has really defined what a big box retailer
Starting point is 00:13:39 is, all the things in one place and then Target and then all these other things. So I'm not precious about Walmart. I understand it's a huge corporation and it doesn't do all the things good all the time. Because the corporation is just a money-making machine and money doesn't care. It just doesn't, right? It's never going to. The shareholders are never going to care about whether one particular associate has healthcare or doesn't, makes enough money to pay their rent or doesn't. That's not what it's built to do. That's the downside of consumerism, of capitalism.
Starting point is 00:14:14 But when you need something cheap, when you have 12 to 15 children and you need to go buy something and you don't want to pay a premium for the premium brand or whatever it is, or you need to buy multiple things from groceries to Tupperware to a quart of oil to potting soil or a light bulb. There's one place to go do it. Let's go do it there. It's like Home Depot.
Starting point is 00:14:35 They have all the things I need for my house. I go to Home Depot, right? Exactly. And they're competing with Amazon. They're really trying to get people away from ordering. And I saw that Walmart's going gonna be doing drone delivery in Atlanta. Drone delivery? Drone delivery.
Starting point is 00:14:49 Say, what? Yep. Wow, cool, dude. Yeah. That's gonna go horribly mad. That's gonna go horribly mad. I can see that. They're partnering with some company called Wing.
Starting point is 00:14:59 Yeah. Wings. Wings. Yeah. It can only do two and a half pounds. Yeah, what are you ordering two and a half pounds? I don't know, but should be interesting. Can I get a Bic lighter and a box of Camel lights?
Starting point is 00:15:17 Two and a half pounds. There's nothing that's like an apple is a pound. I mean, what are you going to do? You're two apples? Can I get two apples, please? But listen, Amazon tried this and it failed miserably. They have been trying this for years. They said there was going to be drone delivery 10 years ago, but they couldn't do it. Domino's tried drone delivery. I forgot about Domino's. And they kept crashing the pizzas into people's houses.
Starting point is 00:15:40 I mean, I guess this is going to go bad. I just see it going bad. Atlanta is not a real place, by the way. Have you ever seen this online? And you don't do social media too much, but there are a number of accounts that are Atlanta-focused, and they keep saying, the tagline is, Atlanta is not a real place,
Starting point is 00:15:55 and then some craziness that's going on in Atlanta. That clearly divides. There's ATL Scoop. ATL Scoop does it a lot too. Atlanta is not a real place. It's not a real place. It really isn't. Drone delivery, less than two pounds. God, two it a lot too. Atlanta is not a real place. It's not a real place. It really isn't.
Starting point is 00:16:05 Drone delivery less than two pounds. What are you gonna get? God, it's two and a half pounds. Can I get a half a pound of ham and a loaf of bread? Right. Yeah, that's what you get. I mean, how are they gonna make money doing that? They said they're trying to up the weight limit.
Starting point is 00:16:21 Yeah, but then you gotta have bigger and bigger drones. Yeah. Then you get FAA. That thing is so weird. Yeah, it then you got to have bigger and bigger drones. Yeah. Then you get FAA. That's gonna be so weird. Yeah, it's gonna be weird to see the drone landing in my neighbor's house with a... I don't know. With a what? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:16:32 Lube? I'm not sure what they're gonna get. I wanna try it. Just like I wanna try that self-driving car. I have no interest in the self-driving car, but I'll do it for the show if we can record it. I think that's what we need to do. Yeah, I'm a little nervous about that, to be honest with you,
Starting point is 00:16:44 if I'm being real with you. But Walmart is this big, huge bad boy corporation that makes a ton of money that has been around forever and ever. I went to grade school with a kid whose father and uncle were some of the original executives at- The Waltons. Well, that's the family.
Starting point is 00:17:06 What was the name of the store before Walmart? It was called the... Oh, I can't remember the name of it. Kmart? No, Kmart was a different thing. That didn't succeed. Hold on, let me ask Chet GPT real quick, because I want to make sure I get this right. I don't want to... I want to make sure I get this one thing
Starting point is 00:17:22 right on the commercial break. What was the original name of the Walmart stores? May I also point out that you were very against AI and now Chatty is your best friend. That's right. Yeah, you're right about that. Yes, Walmart discount city and I think there was a couple of Walton discount cities too. Those were originally in Arkansas, right? That's where Walmart is based in Arkansas, in Bentonville. But they had the original stores, I think were in the Little Rock area.
Starting point is 00:17:54 But his uncle, this kid Tony that I went to school with, his uncle and his father were original executives at that store, at that chain of stores when they started to suck up all the other discount stores and then build these huge discount retailers. And so I don't know where Tony is today. I'm sure he's in Mallorca, fucking on a cliff somewhere. Uh, but they were well to do back then when I knew them. And I'm sure that it's only gotten, they've only gotten more wealthy
Starting point is 00:18:22 because of the incredible expansion of Walmart in the eighties, nineties, two we all know it we all have one we all been there and we've all seen that it's a magnet not only for middle class folks looking for stuff that you know on a budget but for everybody and Walmart can be kind of a crazy place it It's not real. Walmart is not a real place. You know what I'm saying? So I go to Walmart a couple of weeks ago, and I'm in there looking for whatever it is I'm looking for, and I can't find it. I'm looking for, oh, like a dish towel or something like that. So I asked the lady, do you have like just a regular white throwaway dish towel, like a rag, cheap rags, right? And she says, oh, this was after the baby threw up. Oh, yeah. And so she says, oh, this was after the baby threw up. Okay. And so she says-
Starting point is 00:19:05 Yeah, you had to stop at the Walmart. Yeah, go to this aisle. And I say, okay. So I start walking toward that aisle and I look down the aisle and there is a lady who's probably in her 50s or 60s, heavy set, maybe 250, 300 pounds, in a string bikini with a wig on that's a mullet. Yes, that's exactly the kind of person we want to talk to.
Starting point is 00:19:35 Yes, that's the kind of person you would get. And I did not, I bailed on the rags because I was like, not gonna do it,. Not going to get in an interaction here. She was right where I needed to go. And I was scared. I just was scared. That was it. But Walmart is this big, bad corporation with hundreds of thousands, maybe a million employees throughout the world.
Starting point is 00:20:00 And some people argue that they don't always treat their employees well. Well, of course you can't when you have that many employees and some of them are making less than a living wage. Part time, full time, there's a big distinction of whether or not you get benefits and all this other stuff. I thought they were trying to change that a while back, but. They did, I think during the Obama administration, they had some big flub up and Walmart decided, okay, we're going to give people a living wage.
Starting point is 00:20:24 Pay better and do insurance. And then during the Trump administration, they get rid of all protections for everybody. I mean, it's just, it's a corporation. They are pandering to the administration because that's what they have to do for survival. And survival means making the most amount of money possible. So, you know, I don't know, good, bad, or indifferent, that is the world that we live in.
Starting point is 00:20:49 That is the thing that happens. Like, people are always, I get in conversations with people, and they're like, and I agree with you 100%, Jeff Bezos, Mark Zuckerberg, who I never thought had the best interests of anybody in mind, but okay, you know, they're pandering to the administration. They pandered to the last administration too.
Starting point is 00:21:06 Because they don't give a shit. Their companies don't give a shit. A company is a money-making machine. It does not have feelings. It does not care. It will not care. It will never care. Its whole job, its whole responsibility, its whole life,
Starting point is 00:21:19 if you could call it that, it's an it. It's just a suck up as much money as possible, distribute it to the shareholders and the executives and move on to the next day. That's it. So Walmart, millions of employees all around the world, but they have one special day or week where they celebrate some, a few of those employees. Have you heard about this? Walmart appreciation, employee appreciation week or whatever it is in Bentonville, Arkansas. And make no mistake about it, Bentonville, Arkansas is a company town. That's what it is.
Starting point is 00:21:50 It does not exist. It's not on the map in its current form or in any form unless Walmart is there. And apparently it is a very well-to-do, very posh, very lovely city because of Walmart. Of course. You know, hundreds of thousands of suppliers every year come into Bentonville. They stay the night or the week. They try and convince Walmart
Starting point is 00:22:11 to just put one of their items on a shelf. So maybe they have a chance at making money. And then Walmart beats them up for every penny until they decide that they are or not gonna give them shelf space. It's Bentonville is like, it's the mouth of the lion, so to speak. People going in there and look at, I saw that like Paris Hilton had something in Walmart
Starting point is 00:22:29 when I passed by a shelf when I was in there. Oh really? Yeah, she's got, I can't remember what it is. Is it like a kid DJ? I was like, really? Paris Hilton. Yeah, listen, I like the Zac Brown band. I like them. And then I was on Zac Brown's Instagram page.
Starting point is 00:22:51 You know Zac Brown was here in Atlanta. He started here in Atlanta. With the Francisco Vidals and the Angie Aperos of the world. I want my chicken fries. Yeah. I don't get it on my chicken fries. Get it on the frying pan. He used to live close to where I lived.
Starting point is 00:23:04 And I would see him riding in his Jeep down the street when that song became popular. I was like, wow, there's a famous guy with his Jeep riding down the street. Anyway, I'd love to have him on the show. We'll see. He's been doing the podcast around lately. So I thought, well, hey, Bella. Yeah, Atlanta Connection.
Starting point is 00:23:21 We'll see. So anyway, so I saw that Zach Brown, he had a wine or a cooler or something, like the lemon something, and he had to go to a Kroger where they're selling them. And he has a mascot that's a lemon. Really? This lemon is like dancing around this big display of Zach's wine and Zach's standing there. You know, by the way, he's so cut and ripped now.
Starting point is 00:23:46 He's like, he's just, he looks like a wrestler, honestly. And he's standing there and he's trying to like make it. Sometimes you got to do what you got to do, right, Zach? You got to make that, those big boys, those big bones. All right, let's take a break. And I want to tell you about Walmart appreciation because the whole point of the whole segment and I can't even get to it. All right, we'll be back. I like my chicken pride. A cold beer on a Friday night. Something else that tastes just right. With the radio on. We'll be back. Okay, you're probably wondering why I, Rachel, have taken over the voice duties at TCB. It's pretty simple. Astrid asked me to shut Brian up, even for a minute. Well, lovely Astrid, your
Starting point is 00:24:30 wish is my command. Do you want to help Astrid, too? You know you do. Leave a message for her or me or Chrissy at 212-433-3TCB. That's 212-433-3822. You can be on the show, too. Mm-hmm. Just call and say something. Anything. Or text us, and we'll text you right back. Promise. Then head over to TCBpodcast.com and get your free sticker.
Starting point is 00:24:55 It's your constitutional right to a sticker, and we must abide. You get the point. Follow us on Instagram at The Commercial Break. And watch all the episodes on video at youtube.com slash The Commercial Break. Best to you and Astrid, especially Astrid. Whether it's a family member, friend or furry companion joining your summer road trip, enjoy the peace of mind that comes with Volvo's legendary safety. During Volvo Discover Days, enjoy limited time savings
Starting point is 00:25:26 as you make plans to cruise through Muscogee or down Toronto's bustling streets. From now until June 30th, lease a 2025 Volvo XC60 from 1.74% and save up to $4,000. Conditions apply. Visit your GTA Volvo retailer or go to volvocars.ca for full details. As I was saying, Walmart associate, Walmart associate week, also known as shareholder
Starting point is 00:25:50 week or whatever, is a week that they put on every year. They've been doing it for years. And apparently how it works, this is from like Reddit posts and social posts that I read, is that if you are an outstanding employee, or they think you're an outstanding employee, other people then vote you or vote some people from the store to be allowed to go to Bentonville, Arkansas to take part in Walmart associate week where they have shareholder meetings and rah rah sis boom bah, you did great, here's the numbers, congratulations, yet another year of insanely crazy profits. I think I read that they made 681 billion dollars in gross revenue. Now, of course, that's not profit. 51 billion in profit. That's, you know, please. Commercial
Starting point is 00:26:32 break makes out on a Tuesday. Tom Tate. Yeah. Yeah. What profit? Profit! What's that? It's a means to an end. So, they do this whole number. And apparently apparently it's a very big deal if you get invited to go. As one person on Reddit put it, quote, you haven't lived until you've been to Walmart week in Bentonville, Arkansas. It's a week filled with I can only imagine debauchery and hotel rooms and parties and drinking. I mean, this is Walmart associates. That's a tough fucking job to have no matter what position in the store you have, maybe. What do you think a general manager of a Walmart makes? Couple hundred thousand a year?
Starting point is 00:27:14 Couple hundred. What does a GM of a Walmart make a year? I bet it's less than that. Make a year. I bet it's not. Because I mean, you imagine a Walmart store probably makes 40, 50, 60, 100 million dollars a year. A general manager of a store can make 100 and oh, we are so wrong about this. Well, I was going to say around 100. Oh. We are so wrong about this. I was going to say around a hundred.
Starting point is 00:27:47 At the high end, a super store GM can make around $550,000 a year. Wow. Holy shit. What am I doing with my life? We need to go get shops at the Walmart. No shit, that's less than the commercial break took home last year. That's crazy. That is crazy.
Starting point is 00:28:15 Whoa. Good for them. Good for Walmart. Paying them. Okay. A market manager makes about $620,000 a year that's multiple stores. Mm-hmm But it also does say that some of the
Starting point is 00:28:36 smaller Grossing stores like the smaller stores and smaller markets average about 117 to 170 thousand dollars a year. So okay, so either way if if you're a GM, you're doing okay. You know, you're not rich unless I guess you have one of these super stores. Like there's a super store near my house. I bet that person makes, you know, $400,000, $500,000 a year. Geez, I'm gonna go talk to them. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:58 Yeah, we're gonna be podcasting from Walmart. That's basically what I wanna say. Because Brian's gonna be a Walmart superstore GM and Christy's going to have to come there on my lunch hour to record the commercial break. That's crazy. All right. But by and large, the average pay at a Walmart is nowhere near $117,000 a year.
Starting point is 00:29:18 It's probably 40, 50. Well, for what? Like the cashier? Yeah. Let's see. Probably like an hourly. What is the average associate pay? Um, yeah, I bet it's probably 30, 40, 50 a year.
Starting point is 00:29:36 Let's see here. Um. And now they have those self checkouts too, which makes it easier. Yeah, that's true. Now they don't need as many people. Well, you know, the average wage here in Georgia is about $17 an hour, right? So let's say you're doing 17 times 40 times 50 weeks a year with two weeks vacation. So you're making about $35,000 a year. Not a lot of money, right? It's tough to live on $35,000 a year and you're working 40 hours a week. You do get,
Starting point is 00:30:10 I'm sure, benefits, health and all that other stuff when you're working full time. But okay, so you're making $40,000 a year. Let's say you've been there for a while, you're making $40,000, $50,000 a year and you get voted in to go to Bentonville, Arkansas, all expenses paid for a trip to the whoopty-boopty-doo big Walmart parade. Party time. Party time. Chrissy, this is probably fucking debauchery. I have to imagine, if you've ever been to one, 212-433-33-TCB, we have to hear about
Starting point is 00:30:40 it. Your name and your voice can be discussed. Well, I mean, I'm very intrigued with the you haven't lived until you've been to this party. I mean, that's a big statement. That's a big statement to say you haven't lived until you've been to that party. I've been to a lot of parties, some of them wild. I once saw a tiger eat meat, raw meat, in the middle of a party. You know what I'm saying? Like I've been to some pretty fucking wild parties.
Starting point is 00:31:05 But this, from all accounts on Reddit, from people who are supposedly- What were some of the things? Like you said, is it debauchery? Just debauchery. A lot of alcohol. I think it's some people were saying that they do have like company sponsored events. I mean basically like any company retreat. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:31:22 But Walmart is the biggest company. So they probably have a lot of rules around, you know, drink ticket type bullshit, right? You have a wristband, they scan you, you can't have too many, you'd probably put alcohol sensors on you or some shit like that. But you know, there's always a way around anything.
Starting point is 00:31:36 There's the company sponsored stuff, but that's not where the real action happens. The real action happens after parties. That's right, two in the morning, three in the morning, four in the morning, and you're just wazooed in some, you know, Marriott in Bentonville, Arkansas, or stumbling around this beautiful town, trying to find your way back to wherever it is you're going.
Starting point is 00:31:57 We've all been there. I've been to a few podcast conferences where the same thing was happening. It always happens at the work events because that's where you don't have your spouse and your, or whoever, and there's no responsibility. And it's almost like the company is sanctioning you, just getting as ugly as possible.
Starting point is 00:32:15 And it'll be okay because you were at the event, right? It was all under the umbrella and the warm coddling nature of Walmart. Clear channel or wherever. It was all under the umbrella and the warm, coddling nature of Walmart. Clear channel or wherever. Even the small companies I've been, the small companies are the worst because there's no big umbrella, but then there's also zero chance you're getting fired because you're snorting lines with the CEO.
Starting point is 00:32:40 You know what I'm saying? But we've all been there. We've, if you've worked for any kind of corporation anywhere, then you know what I'm saying? But we've all been there. If you've worked for any kind of corporation anywhere, then you know that these sanctioned events are often the ones that get the most disgusting. That's just it. People get crazy. Romances blossom, affairs happen,
Starting point is 00:32:58 people get embarrassingly drunk or high and they do something that make them a legend or fired one of the two. Yeah. You know? I want to know. Oh yeah, having some crazy parties. I want to know. I want to know all about it. You have to call and you have to let us know.
Starting point is 00:33:16 But here is the real rub. So at the end of the week, capped, capping off this entire, you know, big party, right? Let's, I think it's a week. I'm about to tell you what they did. What is Walmart Associate Week? I wanna know, I wanna get a little bit more color detail on the, like color commentary on this. I read a lot of Reddit posts, but some of them weren't as great. Week long celebration that coincides
Starting point is 00:33:47 with Walmart's annual shareholders meeting typically held the first Friday in June. The highlight is the Friday Association Celebration, a pep rally style event featuring top executives, entertainment and motivational messaging. Meeting and educational sessions happen throughout the week, expos and activities, there are games, vendors booth, networking opportunities, and sometimes fun attractions like petting zoos.
Starting point is 00:34:10 Petting zoos. For adults? Yes. Okay. So, are you ready to hear who played, who was at this year's Walmart Association Week? I'm ready. Okay. You're not, you're, this is, you're just going to blow your fucking mind.
Starting point is 00:34:26 Is it the guy from Creed who I saw at the Bill Montstakes? Oh no, but we'll talk about that in the next section. I love that. Okay. Here we go. This year, well, 2024 starred Lizzo, Backstreet Boys, Peyton Manning, and Robert Downey Jr. Wow. Was like an emcee of the event.
Starting point is 00:34:48 OK. But this year, pop country superstar Post Malone. OK. They're bringing in the big guns. Yes. Post Malone. Hold on one second. I just had it.
Starting point is 00:35:01 Noah Khan. Oh. Hold on one second, I just had it. Noah Cahn, Kamiya Cabello, and Jimmy Fallon were in attendance to entertain the good folks of Walmart, starting at 8 a.m. in the morning. It's a day-long celebration where Post Malone is playing for you at 8.15 in the fucking morning. It's crazy. Now, I get it.
Starting point is 00:35:33 Listen, all of you are out there, you're saying, holy shit, Post, like, you know, you used to be like a real one. You are a real one. And here's why Post Malone cannot turn down, first of all, probably the $2 million that they paid him. I was going to say, yeah, the money. All of the people. Yes. Including Jimmy Fallon.
Starting point is 00:35:51 Yes. But here's why you really can't turn it down. Because first of all, Jimmy Fallon, for those of you that don't know, is an entrepreneur. He has a lot of different businesses outside of that tonight show gig he has. But Post Malone sells albums and believe it or not, people still buy albums. They buy CDs, they buy records. A lot of people buy a lot of people. There's even a tape business out there.
Starting point is 00:36:17 Some people are going back to tapes. Why? I don't know. But okay, let's do it. Yeah. The number one seller of CDs and records in this country is Walmart. In the world is Walmart.
Starting point is 00:36:31 And if Walmart chooses to put your album on its shelves like any other product out there in a Walmart, it means sales and probably a lot of them. Post Malone, Camilla Cabello, they cannot say no to Walmart because they need Walmart to sell those albums. Because believe it or not, there still is money to be made in the music business and a lot of that money can be made selling CDs and albums. It's one of the few places that musicians can still make money. You can't make money on Spotify. You just can't. You have to, what, most, like the average royalty check from Spotify, even for the big
Starting point is 00:37:07 players, is like $100,000 a year. That goes to the lawyers and the agents. That's it. Bye-bye. See you later. So I understand why they feel the need to say yes to this. But then also, they're playing to a crowd of people who are consumers of their music. The Associates didn't. playing to a crowd of people who are consumers of their music. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:37:25 The associates didn't, the associates are not the Walmart executives making millions of dollars a year on stock options. They're just regular Joe Shmuel's like you and me, right? And they're, you know, hanging out and they're being appreciated and celebrated for the hard work that they do. So you can buy, you know, skirt steak for a dollar 25 a pound. So you can buy, you know, skirt steak for $1.25 a pound. So I can appreciate that Post looks at this in some, and he goes,
Starting point is 00:37:53 yeah, this is a good thing for me to do because this is my crowd. First of all, these are my people. They buy my albums. Second of all, I'm getting paid $2 million for a half an hour worth of work. That's not a bad deal. Third of all, I get to go to Bentonville, Arkansas for Walmart Associate Week. And according to some, you haven't lived. Yeah. I imagine Post Malone was showing up
Starting point is 00:38:08 to some of those parties. I gotta imagine. Probably. Yes, I gotta imagine Post is at some bar in Bentonville, Arkansas, probably doing karaoke. I hope so. Yeah, me too. Smoking cigarettes, doing karaoke with the associates.
Starting point is 00:38:20 Yeah. But third of all, I need Walmart to put my next album on their shelves so that I can get that sweet sweet CD money I wonder if people go to go to this like people that don't work at Walmart Yeah, I wonder if some people go or to Bentonville around this time just to be amongst you gotta imagine to the party You gotta imagine that they do you gotta imagine that there are associates out there who ask for the week off or some time off just to be in the mix,
Starting point is 00:38:50 just to go there and be with their friends, even though they're not sanctioned to be there. But I also think that Bentonville is probably a company town in the sense that, I bet there's a lot of security and police officers and stuff like that. They probably have their own Bentonville FBI out there. You know what I'm saying?
Starting point is 00:39:03 Like WBI, the Walmart Bureau of Investigation. But just to like swirl around the bars, hotels, that kind of thing. Maybe we should do that. I just thought you read my mind. I've been wanting to do the gathering of the Juggalos for years, but it's already been done. But I haven't seen anybody do the Bentonville, Arkansas,
Starting point is 00:39:20 Walmart Associates Week. It's out there for the taking. Listen, we should do this and then we'll record an episode about it in one of their stores at their podcast studio. Yes, yes, yes. It's all coming together. That's the job that needs to be done.
Starting point is 00:39:34 I just laid it out and I think we're gonna do that. If you work for Walmart and I have to imagine, out of all the tens of people that listen to us, one of you work for Walmart. If you do and you know about this and you'd be able to share, you'd like to share, right? I don't want anything that's gonna get you in trouble. We can disguise your voice, your name,
Starting point is 00:39:53 you can write it down, I can read it, whatever it is, no identifying information. I wanna know about all the dirt, all the jam. I wanna hear about it. What is it like to be at Walmart Associates Week? Because I knew about this. I had read about it in years past, but I had zero interest in finding out more.
Starting point is 00:40:13 Like it was just kind of like a blurb in a online rag. But then when I started digging this year, I thought to myself, holy shit, this really is a jam. This is a fucking party and people are out there. And these are not, you know, crypto bros with their private planes running around cooking crack in a fucking easy bake oven. These are like normal people like you and me,
Starting point is 00:40:35 just doing their thing. And they get shoved off to Bentonville to get drunk and bang their head against the hotel wall. How awesome is that? And listen to Post Malone. I wonder if there are a lot of, let's, let me see here. get drunk and bang their head against the hotel wall. How awesome is that? And listen to Bo's Malone. I wonder if there are a lot of, let me see here, hotels, Bentonville, Arkansas. Let me see.
Starting point is 00:40:57 Let's see what kind of hotels they have here. I'm just, okay. There's the Avid Hotel, which looks like one of these nice like long stays. Staybridge Suites, Candlewood Suites, the True by Hilton, Embassy Suites, Holiday and Express, DoubleTree, Hilton Garden Inn, Home to Suites. Yeah, they've got a lot of hotels.
Starting point is 00:41:17 No Ritz. No Ritz. But you know, there's only so much you can ask for in Bentonville, Arkansas. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. That's not to say there won't be one one day, but you gotta imagine the crowd that they're catering to. But, you know, there's only so much you can ask for in Bentonville, Arkansas. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. That's not to say there won't be one one day, but you got to imagine the crowd that they're
Starting point is 00:41:28 catering to. First of all, you know, a company like Walmart, even the executives are probably having to stay at the Hilton. Yeah. Gardenette, right? They're, they, they don't want to give the appearance that they're just blowing a bunch of money on the Four Seasons every time they show up into town. And second of all, most of the people who come in there, even for business, are small entrepreneurs looking
Starting point is 00:41:45 to put their products into a Walmart. And my understanding is, listen, I had a friend who was trying to do this for years, and then I knew a lawyer who, this is weird. So you know Shark Tank? Yeah, of course. There was a guy named, I can't remember his name, the very first set of sharks, Kevin.
Starting point is 00:42:06 Kevin O'Leary? No, not Kevin O'Leary, Kevin somebody else. There were two Kevins, and one of them, one of the Kevins, like the first sharks, there was a shark that sits in Mark's seat, where Mark sits now, and he was part of the first season of Shark Tank. And he was one of these infomercial guys. He would take your product and he would put it on an infomercial. He would sell millions of them.
Starting point is 00:42:31 That's what he did. That was his thing. And he made millions and millions of dollars doing this. And he became pretty well known for it. So well known that when Shark Tank came together, they asked him to sit in that seat. He was there for the first season. I can understand why he wasn't the most interesting character. Like, he didn't fight hard for some of the deals.
Starting point is 00:42:49 Maybe he didn't have the connections of the other people. He just wasn't maybe, um... I don't know, telegenic enough. Let's put it that way. But I knew a lawyer who worked with this guy, and he called on a friend of mine and I to work with him to vet out these opportunities. So they would get leads that would come in the door. I would help them vet out these opportunities
Starting point is 00:43:13 by contacting the inventor or the entrepreneur and figuring out, seeing if it was right for this kind of opportunity for Kevin to then invest in and take to the next level. So I kind of got a little taste of this world. I only did this for like six months because quite frankly, it was very hard and every entrepreneur thought they had the next thing.
Starting point is 00:43:29 This one guy had like a cookie dipper straw, like a straw you would put a cookie in and dip it in the milk and then you could suck. Okay. Okay. How about your fingers? Yeah, okay, all right, right? So, but I mean, not maybe, maybe, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:43:43 That was the other thing is like, I'm not qualified to know whether or not millions of people are gonna want this. It's not, I don't know. And that was the other thing, it's like, I'm not qualified to know whether or not millions of people are gonna want this. It's not, it wasn't interesting to me. Anyway, I got a little taste of all of this. Apparently you walk into a Walmart boardroom, you pitch them this opportunity. They say yes, it changes your life almost overnight,
Starting point is 00:43:59 but almost overnight, your margins are shrinking minute by minute because Walmart really does beat you up to make sure that their customers are getting the lowest possible price. That's part of the discount store motto. That's how Walmart became what it is. And so yes, it can change your life. You can get a million purchase orders overnight, but you go from 30% profit margins to 3% profit margins. It can change your life in ways you didn't expect.
Starting point is 00:44:27 And then there's this whole, you know, financing that goes on behind the purchase orders and all of this behind closed doors that apparently can or cannot be predatory or whatever. So, you know, Walmart is a machine, and it all lives in Bentonville, Arkansas. That is the machine. And once a year, one week a year, everybody turns up and turns out. Brian and Chrissy have to know about it. So you
Starting point is 00:44:55 call me so that I can figure it out. And then maybe next year, Chrissy and Brian will be in Bentonville, Arkansas. Probably getting arrested by the local Walmart police for showing up in the first place. You know what I'm saying? They probably don't take too kindly to strangers. Well, if we're out there to do our podcast in the Walmart. True. I mean, a year from now, they'll probably be out there. So we've got business.
Starting point is 00:45:18 We got business. We're here to record the podcast and we need stories. The clients. Yeah. Or Walmart, if you want to pay us $2 million, we'll be happy to make this the best story that's ever been told on the commercial break in your favor. I am not above selling out. Sorry, I got a family to feed.
Starting point is 00:45:38 We'll be back. Hi, cats and kittens, Rachel here. Do you ever get the urge to speak endlessly into the void, like Brian? Well, I've got just the place for you to do that. 212-433-3TCB. That's 212-433-3822. Feel free to call and yell all you want.
Starting point is 00:46:01 Tell Brian I need a race. Compliment Chrissy's innate ability to put up with all his shenanigans. Or tell us a little story. The juicier the better, by the way. We'd love to hear your voice, because Lord knows we're done listening to ourselves. Also, give us a follow on your favorite socials. At the Commercial Break on Insta, TCB Podcast on TikTok. And for those of you who like to watch, oh, that came out wrong, we put all the episodes out on video, youtube.com slash the commercial break
Starting point is 00:46:29 and tcbpodcast.com for all the info on the show, your free sticker or just to see how pretty we look. Okay, I gotta go now. I've got a date with my dog. No, seriously, Axel needs food. Today is pork chop day. We hope you're enjoying your Air Canada flight. Rockies, vacation, here we come.
Starting point is 00:46:50 Whoa, is this economy? Free beer, wine, and snacks. Sweet. Fast free Wi-Fi means I can make dinner reservations before we land. And with live TV, I'm not missing the game. It's kind of like I'm already on vacation. Nice.
Starting point is 00:47:07 On behalf of Air Canada, nice travels. Wi-Fi available to Airplane members on EquipFlight, sponsored by Bell Condition Supply, seercanada.com. You can't get a well-groomed lawn delivered, but you can get chicken parmesan delivered. Sunshine? No. Some wine? Yes. Get almost almost anything delivered with Uber Eats. Order now. Alcohol in select markets. See app for details. Okay, ready? From Reddit. I was selected to go for my store. As far as it was explained to me, there will be presentations for us to attend from representatives of our store,
Starting point is 00:47:44 as well as fun stuff to do once all the presentations are over. Someone earlier in this thread mentioned the performers they have had in the past. I'm not 100% sure. I'm relatively new to the Walmart world and I have a ton to learn I'm sure. I just got registered to go today from speaking with someone who went in 2023. She basically said that they have different meetings and tours set up to learn about the business. Plus they they have lots of activities to do. And when she went, they even had a petting zoo. She said it was definitely a big learning experience, meeting people from all over. The best time of your life. Last year, Lizzo, Backstreet Boys, and Etcedra played.
Starting point is 00:48:20 It's the opportunity of a lifetime. Everything is paid. They feed you. They booze you. You get to talk to associates around the world. There's lots of walking though. It's the best time I have ever had in my entire life. Whoa. It's the best time I've had in my entire life. Oh, God. Wow, that's... I say we decamp. Yeah, we got to do this.
Starting point is 00:48:43 To Bentonville for a week next year. Let's see. Forget about Disney kids. Yeah, I wanna hear what the real dirt is though. I mean, give me the real dirt. I'm sure that they have fear of getting fired. It's very laid back, quote unquote. Take that, I'm speaking in code,
Starting point is 00:49:08 take that for what it is. Yeah, I was gonna say, you could make it, I'm sure you could make it anyway you want it. Yes, it's also worth mentioning that, oh, it's also worth mentioning that you get free food, but I'm lucky to get, this lady goes, I'm lucky if I get a bottled water and a PB and J during the afternoon. Oh, come on.
Starting point is 00:49:32 Just being ungrateful then. But I mean, listen, if I made, you know, if you're making $35,000 a year, you're really watching all your P's and Q's. I can't think of, you know, the only like true, I guess, worker appreciation thing that I ever went to that I thought was worthy of conversation. I got hired by a consulting company one time. I was pretty young, you know, at this time. We're talking like 15 years ago. You're such a Renaissance man.
Starting point is 00:50:08 I am, I've really done it all. You should do a little of this. I was working with Raphael. We were selling the websites. We got a client. That client was a large consulting company. They consulted on CRM automation, which is now like the world that we live in. Yeah, everybody does it.
Starting point is 00:50:24 Customer relationship management tools like Salesforce and Eloqua, and they would essentially consult with huge companies like Post, the food company, or Kellogg's, or whatever, on how to integrate these systems into their existing systems to capture customer data, use that data in ways that back then, we could see coming down the pike, but weren't quite there yet, like AI and all this other stuff. So we would go in there, you would go in there for a couple of months, you would help them mesh these tools together, integrate them, train, teach, right?
Starting point is 00:51:01 And I knew little about this, but I think the guy who owned the company liked me, the person, and thought that I was a good talker. So he put me as a salesperson, as a consultant. So within two weeks of being hired there, oh, this is the time that I went to the, I go to the interview, it's at his house. I have a car that has half a front. I'm not even kidding. One half of the car is missing, basically. It's like a 2006 Honda Accord, two door Honda Accord, gray. Okay? Oh, I remember riding in that car.
Starting point is 00:51:38 This is like 2012 or 13 or something like that. And I parked on the other side. I parked on the other side of the cul-de-sac. So if they looked out their window, they could only see the good side. And then I sat in the car and made sure they weren't looking out the windows before I drove away. When I get to their house, it's him and his wife who run the company. They were interviewing me.
Starting point is 00:52:01 And then at the end of the interview, they're like, you got, actually, I was so scared of showing up to my car that I canceled the first interview at their house because I didn't, I wanted to see if I could borrow Raphael's car to show up there. Well, he couldn't let me use his car. So I just made up this excuse. There was too much traffic to go up there and they kept on like, it's okay. It's okay. Just calm.
Starting point is 00:52:24 Like, you know, we'll wait for you. And I'm like, no, no, no, there's so much traffic, it's going to be all day. I can't go, I'm sorry. They wanted me so bad that they were like, we'll come tomorrow. And Raphael's like, can't do it tomorrow either. Anyway, so I get there, I do the interview. Great, they're lovely people. And he says, I want to hire you. And I'm like, okay. And he's like, what's your number? And I'm like, 75. And he goes, I was thinking 125. And I was like, that is exactly what I was going to say. 75 plus 50. I didn't even get a chance to finish my sentence. And I was just so thrilled. Oh my God, I'm going to be making this crazy amount of money. Because at the time, it felt like a crazy amount of money to me. Right, right.
Starting point is 00:53:06 And so within two weeks of being there, so I get set up, you know, it's a remote company and this is my like first real like kind of remote job, you know, having to check in and all that. And they give me a computer and they give me a credit card, all this stuff that I had no idea, you know, it was kind of crazy for me. And then he goes, all right, well, I need you to book your tickets to San Francisco because we have company appreciation week, uh, in San Francisco, in, uh, in Oakland, actually across
Starting point is 00:53:33 the Bay, but it was at this nice resort that we were really going to be in San Francisco. And I said, Oh, Oh my gosh. Okay, cool. And I'm like a week and he's like, yeah, go there for a week and you, you know, we're going to hang out, we're going to feed the homeless, we're going to go to the food bank, we're going to do a couple of adventures, we're going to go in the hills, we're going to have some company meetings,
Starting point is 00:53:50 we're going to train, we're going to learn, we're going to talk to each other, we're going to drink, we're going to have fun dinners, all this other stuff. Yeah, it's fun. And I go, oh, okay. And this company has like 70 people that work for it, so it's not a particularly big company where it's the one time a year they get together and they get to see each other. I had no experience in any of this. None of it.
Starting point is 00:54:07 The traveling, the none of it, right? And so I say, okay, great. At the time I had a girlfriend and that girlfriend was a little wacky. Oh Lord, was this the San Francisco trip? Yes, this was the San Francisco trip. So she comes home and I say, I'm going to San Francisco. Can you believe this? I got the trip to this and aren't you going to invite me to go?
Starting point is 00:54:27 I'm like, it's a company trip. I don't think it's like that. And she's like, it's like a company appreciation trip. I'm sure that other spouses are going. And I'm like, you're not a spouse. You're my girlfriend. And I just got hired. But it becomes such a big deal that I have to ask them, right?
Starting point is 00:54:42 I have to then ask, can I? And they're like, yeah, okay. I mean, some of the spouses are going. They've been working here for a long time, but okay, sure. But she can stay in the room. I just would appreciate it. Maybe you could pay for the flight, right? And I was like, yeah, of course.
Starting point is 00:55:01 She's like, listen, the owner of the company was like, listen, I really don't mind. It's not that big of a deal, but you gotta attend all the meetings. Of course, some of them she's not gonna be able to come to. All the company events are just for company people. If she wants to be there, some other spouses are gonna be there. I would fly her out there,
Starting point is 00:55:16 but it's just a bad look on the company, you know? And I was like, no, no, I hear you. I got you, okay. Pay to go out there. Her and I go out there three days ahead of time. So we're there for like three days, just dicking around and doing this other stuff. And the very first night that everybody else showed up to this resort, we're in this beautiful resort in Oakland and everyone met downstairs at the bar to have some fun. And so we, but I don't know whether
Starting point is 00:55:45 or not it's appropriate to bring my girlfriend at the time. So I go, listen, I'm going to go down and I'll text you. Check out the scene. I'll check out the scene and I'll text you. I'll call you. I'll let you know. So like three hours later, I'm like, everyone's just wasted and some spouses are showing up and I'm like, yeah, come on down. Chrissy, first of all, it was one of the funniest, funnest weeks I have ever had. And it was- You haven't lived.
Starting point is 00:56:10 You haven't lived until you've been at a, yeah, until you've been to a small company retreat. But it was the worst, I mean, it was the worst ending to any trip I've ever had. It's painful when you talk about it. I can't even, I didn't mean to. Yeah. You know, I saw recently, I saw a post. Is it, those who have listened to the commercial break
Starting point is 00:56:28 for a long time will have heard this story that the girlfriend that I brought, about three days into the five days of this trip, ended up going out with one of the other spouses while we were all at a company meeting. They went, they had sushi at a place in, in somewhere in San Francisco. And that night she got violently ill. And this was not a joke.
Starting point is 00:56:52 This wasn't drawn, dramatized. She would, it was the most, it was the most horrific thing I've ever seen in my entire life. Coming out both ends, door wide open. I literally had to help clean her up. I mean, it was a bad, bad kind of sick. And bad kind of sick to the point where we took her to the hospital. So I was at the hospital till like 3.30 in the morning. I need to be at a company meeting at like seven.
Starting point is 00:57:12 It was just, the whole thing was just shitty. But then we had to go home and going home and trying to bring her through the airport was insane. So, and I just remember she was like so fussy and screamy at the airport, you know, everything heard, she didn't want to be here. Which was not just in this isolated incident. No, it was not.
Starting point is 00:57:33 No, it was not. Let's point that out. It was all the time. She could turn on the dime. That's just the personality that she had. But so- You saw a post. I saw a post where someone's at an airport
Starting point is 00:57:46 and there's a guy and a girl and they're recording this interaction that's going on between the guy and the girl and the girl is screaming at this guy, screaming, young girl, screaming at this young guy, you know, you don't love me, you don't care about me, you only care about yourself. And la la la la la. It gave me like instant PTSD.
Starting point is 00:58:05 I was like, that's me. They recorded me. That's me years ago. Oh my God. I'm in a loop. I'm in a feedback loop. It was crazy. And I thought, how did Instagram know?
Starting point is 00:58:17 They served me up the post that put me back into the feedback loop. Anyway, it was terrible. Company appreciation week. Hey, listen, we should do that here at the commercial break, but it'd just be you and me in Bentonville, Arkansas. That's what we're doing next year. At the petting zoo. I want to go to the petting zoo. Have you been to a petting zoo? I'm good on the petting zoos. I've been to many petting zoos and I'm good. Astrid hates them.
Starting point is 00:58:40 Oh, I don't like them either. Astrid hates them. Yeah. Listen, I can appreciate that. Oh, I don't like them either. That's an asym. Yeah. Listen, I can appreciate that. We went to a llama farm like a year ago, an alpaca farm, excuse me, not a llama farm, an alpaca farm. And we went with my in-laws and everybody, some people are really excited to do this.
Starting point is 00:58:56 Other people are kind of like, eh. I learned at the alpaca farm that petting zoos are not as exciting as sometimes you make them out to be because you actually have to touch the actual animals. Like the animals that don't have the level of cleanliness that you would expect of a human being, and they're not always nice. You know what I'm saying? They can be quite shitty. They're being petted by a bunch of people.
Starting point is 00:59:18 Yeah, they're being petted by a bunch of people, they're cranky, they're being hand-fed, those alpacas, they're weird looking. I like them, they're cute from a distance. But then when you get close to them, they smell really bad. And then they want to lick you? No thanks. There's a lady on television on that Thousand Pound Sisters, she got bit by a camel. She was at one of those drive-through safaris and the camel put its head in the car and tore off a chunk of her flesh. And no fault of her own, right? The camel did. But then she got arrested by the local Arkansas police because when the cops came, they searched her car and found drugs in her car.
Starting point is 01:00:05 You remember that saying that? Yeah. So anyway, she got put on probation and I guess all's well that ends well. I suppose. You get bit by a camel and then you end up going to jail. Oh, and to add insult to injury. So the judge, so they have this big dramatic moment
Starting point is 01:00:20 where is she gonna go to jail? Is she not gonna go to jail? And the prosecutor does a plea agreement, but the judge has to sign off on it. And there's a pregnant pause while the judge reads over it. And everyone's like, will she go to jail? But you know she's not in jail because this was filmed seven months ago.
Starting point is 01:00:34 But this moment and the judge goes, I will accept your plea deal. No jail time. You will have to be under probation in your own state. Good luck to you. And then they're like, thank you, judge. As they're leaving out the courtroom, he goes, oh, one more, one more matter. I'm sorry, I forgot to tell you the Arkansas Children of God Petting Zoo will permanently
Starting point is 01:00:55 trespass you from their property. You're never allowed to go back there again. And I'm like, she said it, I didn't have to, but like you'd ever want to go back there again. You got eaten by a camel. The animals are so hungry here that they chew on people's arms. Fuck you! Yeah, that's, I'm good on the pudding juice. Yeah. No thanks. But one of our kids loves them.
Starting point is 01:01:20 Well, when you're a kid, it's a whole other thing. Past 15, I think, maybe. It's not the same. I think past 10. Yeah. Listen, I love animales. I wanna be all around them. Of course, I do too. Yeah, but the petting zoos can be a little weird.
Starting point is 01:01:40 Let's just all say it. Those goats have weird eyes. You know what I'm saying? Like the mountain goats, they have those weird devil eyes and they want to... I saw a real where... They've got one at the zoo. You guys just went to the zoo a little while back. Yeah, we purposely walked around. We saw the signs and we were like, go this way. Because we went last year and we had to hose the kids down for an hour because the animals were like
Starting point is 01:02:08 getting a little rowdy. They were like, you know, knocking. I remember that too, you talking about that. Yeah, what's that? I remember you talking about that. Yeah, they were like knocking the kids around and I thought, let's get out of here. That pig's gonna eat my child.
Starting point is 01:02:19 I saw this reel where this kid had a pet goat with the horns and he put out a helmet and every night he would go out and bang heads with the goat. And I thought, there's parenting of the year right there. That's nice for a developing brain. Yeah, exactly. So stupid.
Starting point is 01:02:34 But then it said he loves his goat so much that he wants the goat to feel like he has friends. I don't know, what the fuck? So stupid. But have you seen the reel of the elephant pulling the antelope from drowning? I have not. I'm gonna show it to you.
Starting point is 01:02:48 Puts a tear to my eye. An elephant grabs an antelope by its antlers and pulls it out of the water because it is drowning. A baby antelope. So sweet. Unbelievable. Animal world is great. They're gonna revolt against us if they aren't already.
Starting point is 01:03:04 The whales are eating people out in the ocean. That's crazy. All right, 212-433-3TCB, 212-433-3TCB. You got any scoop on the Bentonville, Arkansas, Walmart Associates Week? Let us know. We'd love to hear from you. Or if you're in or around the Atlanta area and you want to be put on the list for future live recordings, let us know at the commercial break and Instagram TCB podcast on tick tock and youtube.com slash
Starting point is 01:03:29 they commercial break for all the episodes on video. The same day they air here on the audio go to TCB podcast.com more information about the show, audio, video and your free stick. Okay, Chrissy, that's all I can do for today. I think I'll tell you that I love you and I love you. And I love you. Best to you. Best to you. And best to you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I will say, we do say and we must say, goodbye.
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