The Commercial Break - Gustavo... International Man of Mystery!

Episode Date: September 30, 2020

The Bit: We're on mission from God! The Show: Bryan discusses passing on his OCD, Gustavo is our producer extraordinaire, the gang is too lazy to do a newsletter, Bryan's brother Danny gave him an update on Brian Dunkleman, Bryan tries to fly his in-laws to the U.S., and Bryan & Krissy discuss their psychedelic days and when Bryan's dad kicked him out of the house (story correction) Don't forget to rate and subscribe so you never miss an episode! Text us or leave us a voicemail at +1-661-BEST2YO ([phone]) LINKS: Get a FREE TCB limited edition collectible sticker Follow us on Instagram Subscribe and watch the show on Youtube Join us live on Fireside New episodes every Tuesday & Friday everywhere you listen to podcasts! For advertising contact AdvertiseCast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

106 miles to Chicago. We got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes. It's dark and we're wearing sunglasses. Hit it! In early 2020, the world shut down. Stores, restaurants, schools, and whole communities shut their doors in an effort to protect human life. As the world quickly changed, one man went on Facebook to get a degree in Internet epidemiology. Brian, along with his lab assistant HOTELY, are curing coronavirus by commenting on fake news and reposting recipes of secret virus cures from a friend of a friend who works high up in government.

Join Brian and Holy as they discuss the world and life doing this forced interruption, learning, laughing and loving in this real life commercial break. On this episode of the commercial break... I can't delete it because I'm like, I remember this. Do you remember when we had some hope? 2020. Happy new year, Roar and 20.

It's gonna be great. It's the best year ever. Everything comes to fruition. It's the best year. My wildest dreams are all coming true. I don't want you. The show was so big and such a success that I know I'm going to have success on the other end of this.

I'm catapulting. I'm going to ride this wave right into huge success. What he rode this wave into was an Uber driver. That's what the guy does now. He's an Uber fucking driver. I didn't want to hurt the grass. I was like, it wasn't about hurting the grass. It's that I knew that the grass had to be broken in order to regrow.

The next episode of the commercial break starts now. I'm going to be doing an announcement. I'm going gonna be doing my show, our show, from my commercial break podcast, official mask. If you can see that out in YouTube land. You see that? Do you like that? I love it. I love it how it's stitched on there.

Absolutely. It looks good. It's super quality. I know. I actually had someone ask me, what is that? But I work with them. So I told them that it was, that I didn't know that I got it for free somewhere. Hahaha.

From my own podcast. They were, some, I don't know. What does it say? I'm not even really sure. I picked it up, you know, one of those free mask places. And he was like, wow, they give away masks like that for free. Oh, yeah, the free mask place. Where's that?

Gas station, I think. I think they're giving these away. I'm sorry, I've been lying to you. I picked it up off the ground at the gas station. That's what I did. So there's my- That's super sanitary. Oh, man, I'm telling you what,

I'm like a fucking, I was already a little bit of a germa fold before this all started. Now I'm like full blown in panic mode. And I know that I'm sending my son straight down the same path that I'm like full blown in panic mode, and I know that I'm sending my son straight down the same path that I'm going down of neuroticism and insanity, because now he gets a little bit of mud on his hands, and he's like, and he shows it to me, and I'm like,

oh, and then I freak out, I'm like, oh, it's coronavirus. We gotta watch our hands, watch hands, watch hands. I know I'm passing my neuroticism onto my child, but I guess there's really no way to avoid it, huh? We all do it. No. I was actually thinking that at the beginning of the Pandemic, you know, wow, this could really be pushing people who have a serious Who who or diagnose let's say with germaphobia or whatever. Oh, yeah You know, this could really push people to the edge listen if my Facebook is any indication of what's going on in the mental health of the United States right now,

it is a straight fucking fuck factory because people are losing their potatoes. I know. Over everything. Hang it on by a threat. I don't even, I don't think there's any thread to be hung on to anymore. I was just talking to a friend and I hadn't talked to her in probably five years. So I said, oh my god, it must have been five years since we spoke.

And she goes, no, I think it was just last year and I was like, man, it's 2020 feels like five years because I know. I honestly, I'm losing track of time and space and it's so fucking weird. This feels like the longest year that I've ever had. And we're only about, oh, I guess we're not only about more than two thirds of the way through it.

Yeah. Fucked out, probably. Yeah, it's crazy. I can't even believe this year turned out like this. Like I remember ringing in the new year. And in fact, here's a funny, here's a funny tip that I recorded, Andy Cohen and Anderson Cooper's New Year's thing, just because,

Jeff and I were kind of watching it and kind of doing other stuff and whatever, and I wanted to watch it later, and it's really funny. And so now I see it periodically when I'm looking at my recorded shows. Oh, really? And I'm like, I can't delete it because I'm like,

remember the hope you've got. I mean, it's so important. Yeah, it's like 2020. Happy New Year, Roar and Twenties. It's gonna be great. It's the year ever. Everything comes to fruition. It's the best year.

My wildest dreams are all coming true. And yeah, it just turned out that no Stardomus was 20 years off when he said 2000 was the year it all ends. So. I love me. Wow. Yeah. But you know, enough of that, because you know, enough of that, because we hear about it all the time. And this is the point of the year at all ends. So, wow. Wow, yeah. But, you know, enough of that, because, you know,

enough of that, because we hear about it all the time and this is the point of the commercial break, is to take a break from what's going on in the drama and how do we get past this? We get past this by wearing our fucking masks. I don't even understand. I have a step one. Step one.

I'm still watching these videos and these fucking morons that are just out there. I mean, listen, I understand, you don't want your freedoms trampled on, but you wear a fucking seat belt, you can wear a fucking mask. I've said it before on the show, it's not a big deal. It really isn't, don't make it a big deal.

Just don't make it a big deal. Wear a mask. Maybe they're wrong, maybe they're wrong, maybe they're right, but if a little piece of cloth between you and I, and just think about it this way, most of these people who are not wearing masks, have some kind of ideological,

you know, I don't know. They have an ideological dent in their brain, and so they think the government's, you know, the deep state, you know, the deep state of the living area was 3000 and George Bush, I'm not wrong. Listen. If that's true, the mask is covering you up

from your facial recognition software that's clearly following you around everywhere. So there you go, let your paranoia be calmed by the mask. Just wear. That is a good point. That's a great point. And if you want a TCB mask, this is what you got to do. You have to go to at the commercial break. That is our Instagram page. That's our Insta, Insta. And we also have a Facebook page, but probably the Insta more so than the Facebook page. But our great marketing team here at the great marketing team.

Our great marketing. We do. Our great marketing team here at the commercial break is going to be giving away masks with our logo on it. We have ones for men. We have ones for women. We have big. We have small. We have short. We have tall. Now that I sound like a Dr. Sous Book, go to the commercial break on Insta and become a follower of us of ours. I guess that's how that works. You follow us. And then we have lots of great content on there. We'll be giving away some masks and some cups and some other stuff, some other shuag, because we got it and we want to give it to our faithful listeners out there. All. That is so cool. Thank you, marketing team. You're welcome. That marketing team really

gets out of it. Gustavo, who's one of the marketing team, who really, in all truth is my brother in law, he gets so excited when I say his name on it. I ain't so I'm just like. Gustavo. One day, keep on going, Gustavo, and I'm gonna name an episode after you. Yeah.

The episode Gustavo, episode number 312. Gustavo. Yeah. I love that name too. Gustavo. It's a great name. Yeah, it sounds like a Spanish sex machine, doesn't it? Gustavo.

Gustavo. Gustavo. Gustavo. Gustavo. Gustavo. Gustavo. Gustavo. Gustavo.

Gustavo. Gustavo. Gustavo. It feels like a spy, an international man of mystery. So go to at the commercial break on Insta and join, and then you go to tcbpodcast.com, which is where you can become a member of the break room. Let me explain a little change.

Change up in the seventh inning, if you don't mind, Chrissy. Here's what's gonna happen. I've decided it's entirely too much responsibility for on my shoulders, for me to actually put out a newsletter every month. And given the response of the newsletter, we only have three people at the commercial break, two of them did not open the newsletter. I've decided that no one gives a shit about a newsletter.

What I decided is, or what we've decided is, what we've collectively decided, is that it's probably better if we just give extra content away every week instead of every month because let's be honest about a month goes by, you fucking forget about it. So what we're gonna do is, Chrissy and I are going to do an after show, every single episode. We're gonna do an after show, you can get that after show by going to tcbpodcast.com,

join the break room, and then you get a link to that after show every week, as well as the link to the YouTube video and after show if you remember the break room and big announcement. Next week, episode 2026, because I think we're on 25 now, I can't remember. On episode next week, episode number next week, we are going to be rolling out YouTube for everybody. So there you go.

So if you want extra content, if you feel like you just want to be a part of a club. That's a loosive and exclusive Join us at the break room W W W DCP podcast Gustavo Gustavo I love you so much I got stuff with me and read Henry from podcast universe I just like saying your name. Gustavo Gustavo. I'm doing well. I know you are. I've been checking things out around the house. Just to make sure everything's okay. I want to make sure our band-read is progressing nicely.

I want to make sure that... well let me put it this way. I want to make sure that, well, let me put it this way. I want to make sure that everyone is safe and sound at your home. So I've installed a few electronic devices just to make sure everything's okay. How can the banner at work if you're not even alive? That's basically my point. And so if you see a few beeping things, like maybe a red spot, a blinking light or something like that, don't worry. This is simply a device to make sure you're okay. I call it the podcast tracker universe. Don't be alarmed. Just me, your friendly podcast helper, Henry Panda. That's good to know, Henry. I like your, I like the sound of your voice sometimes. That's good to know Henry. I like your, I like the sound of your voice sometimes.

Oh, he's saying my name one more time. Henry. Gustavo. Gustavo. Gustavo. Oh. I'm gonna make up a song for Gustavo. So what is there to say?

I want to get to something right away, right off the bat before I forget about it. My brother, Danny, he's like a, he himself is, I think, becoming kind of a super fan of the show because he's always emailing me and telling me, texting me and telling me about the things I got right or wrong or what he liked or what he didn't like about the show. And last week, he got to me immediately to explain to me that the guy's name was Brian Duncan.

Men was the second host of American Idol in season number one. Oh, right. We were talking about that. And I thought his name was Ryan also, but turns out it was Brian Dunkleman. It's the guy's name. Brian Dunkleman. Brian Dunkleman was, okay, so for those of you

that don't know and everybody knows, so I'm just rehashing the story for the one person that may not have ever seen American Idol. On season number one of American Idol, there were two hosts, Brian Seacrest and Brian Dunkleman. And they worked as a pair, and one was like the straight man, that would have been Ryan.

Well, you know what I'm saying. I mean, he's not necessarily a straight man, but he was kind of the dry guy, and then there was the comedian type, and that was Brian Dunkleman. And Brian Dunkleman, despite what some people might think, Brian Dunkleman was not fired from American

Idol. He was actually asked to come back and he said, no, I don't want to. The show was so big and such a success that I know I'm going to have success on the other end of this. I'm catapulting. I'm catapulting. Yeah. I'm going to ride this way right into huge success.

What he rode this wave into was an Uber driver. That's what the guy does now. He's an Uber fucking driver, Brian Dunkleman is. And he, you know, and people occasionally get in touch with him and he readily admits, it was, this is his joke, that he's also a standoff comic. And I guess a couple of, I watched it.

Thank God. Maybe we'll ask him if he wants to come on. Should we ask him if he wants to come on? That's a good one. We should, I bet he's got a great story. So don't come in, don't come in, joke says. Some people say I made the biggest mistake in television history by not signing on

to American Idol season two. I say no, you're incorrect. I made the biggest mistake in history. And I'm like, ah, that's a good one. You know, how you doing? Hey, you got to have a sense of humor. I watched one of his sets, that's a good one. You know, how's it going? Hey, you got to have a sense of humor. I watched one of his sets and he's got another joke. I thought it was also pretty funny.

He's like, hey, my wife just had another kid. You know, my wife just had a brand new baby and everyone's like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's like, no, no, no, no, no, settle, settle down. Settle down, it wasn't mine. So, hey, listen, the guys, the guys, he knows how to poke fun in himself and that's it. So Danny, my brother, thank you for that information.

Brian Dunkelman, now an Uber driver, that's the update on Brian Dunkelman. Ryan Seacrest, meanwhile, owns half of, you know, the world. The live role of the media world. We've had quite. We've had quite. At least making a ton of money, let's just say that. That guy is making a shit ton of money. I mean, when you're the executive producer of just one show,

like the giving up with the Kardashians. Yeah, that's enough to just... Yeah. When he brought that to E television, which E television has never been some powerhouse network, you know, I don't know, I mean, I don't know, it's not, I don't watch. I say I'm not... Not used to watch it all the time. What'd you watch? What were you watching?

There was like, well, I mean, they've always had the award show stuff, you know, like the right carpet stuff. And then they've had, you know, they had like talk soup. Talk soup was good. Talk soup was good. I'll give you that. Yeah, with Joe McHale. Yeah.

Yeah, Joe McHale. And then the Kardashians, obviously. And, you know, they were, they were big in my life for a little while. I like always, it was a go-to network. I could change it too, but then after a while, I definitely got away from it. I've been back, really. The only thing that I ever really watched the network for,

I watched Toxup, I liked that, and I thought that was good. And then I watched the Stern Show when they had the Stern Show, which I think really kind of propped them up there for a while. I think that that was, I mean, that show was running. like if it was after nine o'clock at night on E you were Stray was likely Stern was on Reruns or something so that's as since we didn't get stern down here in Atlanta. That's how you know We got to watch Howard Stern if if you were a fan at the time and I I was so

But the e network, but it's never never been a huge powerhouse network, right? It's just kind of like a dinky little, you know, network. When Ryan Seacrest, no matter who was in the executive office at the time, when Ryan Seacrest, the host from American fucking idol walks in the door and he's like, I got a great idea! I'm gonna sell you on. You know that girl? The girl who was in the sex tape with Ragey?

People are like, who the fuck is Ragey? No, I don't remember. He is the, she's the daughter of the guy who advised O.J. Simpson in his trial. You remember that guy and they're like, who the fuck are you talking about? The Kardashians? What is this?

When he walks in the door and says, we're gonna put the Kardashians on TV and it's gonna be, everyone's gonna love it. These executives must have been like, the fuck are you talking about, man? Why would we put somebody, nothing, does nothing, has nothing, person on TV and try and make it interesting?

And what the fuck, it just took the world by storm then. And it's such a shit idea. I mean, when you think about it, we're just gonna follow the Kardashians around. Who fucking cares? But I guess a lot of people fucking care. A lot of people did. Not me, I'm not one.

I just wanna raise my hand and say that. I do not watch those kind of television shows. I do not turn on, I do not turn on. You're a lifetime. Your lifetime. Lifetime is a network for educated men and women in the 21st century crossing. I just want you to know that. They've got lots of great, you know, solid family programming that I like around the house.

I'm embarrassed. Okay, I'm embarrassed. I'm a little bit embarrassed. We had a very exciting week here at the Green Household. My in-laws came in town. My in-laws live in Spain. Let's put it that way. And you can't go from Spain to America or from America to Spain right now because the borders are closed because, you know, because of coronavirus.

Yes. Thank you. I can't even need to be reminding because of coronavirus. So the only way that you can get from Spain to the United States is by quarantining somewhere else in a country that does not have those kind of restrictions. So my in-laws decided that they were going to go to San Jose Costa Rica to quarantine because it's one of the places that they can get in and out of, you know, freely, and then they can go quarantine and then they're allowed to come here to the States. There's a whole process. It's a whole fucking process.

And there's a long story behind this. Costa Rica only just recently opened up their borders for travel to and from the United States because they really were on lockdown too big time. travel to and from the United States because they really were on lockdown too, big time. And so we couldn't get the travel tickets from Costa Rica to here where we live. We couldn't get those tickets till very last minute. Let's just put it that way. So we get these tickets very last minute.

We get online, we get the tickets, we send them over. Everyone's excited. They're gonna come from San Jose, Costa Rica. So this is Friday a couple days ago. So Friday comes 9 o'clock in the morning phone start ringing the beep and ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding and I'm like, geez What's going on? And finally asked her to answer the phone and I just watch her face like, like just drop. Like her eyes got wide and she was like, oh, oh no, oh shit. And I'm like, what's going on?

She's talking in Spanish, you know, it's something about this, something about travel, something about the plane, whatever. And I'm like, oh no, this is the second flight. This is their third flight because the first two were canceled by Delta. Because Delta, for whatever reason, I guess Delta decided they didn't have enough passengers, they didn't want to fly to and from but they took our money and then they canceled the flight,

right? Oh no. And this was from San Jose Costa Rica to Atlanta, Georgia, to the United States, right? But to the United States, bouncing around, but to the United States. So she gets off the phone and she's like, we got a big fucking problem. And I'm like, what's going on? Another flight canceled and she's like, no. You see, her parents showed up at the airport in San Jose with tickets from San Jose to Atlanta, Georgia. The unfortunate part was in order to catch that plane from San Jose to Atlanta, Georgia,

they needed to be in San Jose, California. Not San Jose, Costa Rica. Not only did they not have tickets for this particular flight, Jose California, not San Jose Costa Rica. Not only did they not have tickets for this particular flight, they didn't even have tickets in the same fucking country. Right. I mean, listen, I've made a few travel boobos in my time,

but this is a big travel boobo. When you show up at the airport and you got tickets for a different country altogether, it's like, oh shit, what do you do? Chrissy Ice Square, I have never spent so much time on the phone with so many illogical human beings as I did when I got on the phone with the airline and I won't say the airlines name. Oh my god Chrissy. Oh my god Joe's airline. How can I help you? Oh, yeah, dude. I got a problem. I'm really hoping you can help me out Okay, what's your problem? Yeah, listen, my in-laws, they just showed up in San Jose, Costa Rica airport to fly to Atlanta, Georgia,

but they have tickets for San Jose, California. Uh, I don't think they're gonna be able to get on the flight. What did you say? Yeah, I don't think they're gonna be able to get on the flight with those tickets. Well, no fucking shit. They're in San Jose, Costa Rica. fucking shit. There's San Jose Costa Rica. They need to be in San Jose, California. Yeah, I see your problem.

Well, how can I help you? I need help getting them from San Jose Costa Rica to Atlanta, Georgia. Well, they're certainly not gonna be able to do that with tickets to San Jose, California. Oh, my fucking Christ guy. I just explained it to you. Are there any flights from San Jose Costa Rica to to Atlanta, Georgia? Are they in San Jose, California? Are they in San Jose, Costa? So then he's like, so this is it, but but but but who called me? Let me explain. Not only did it take me

15 minutes to explain the situation to any rational and human being, but at the same time when you call the airline, no one is available. So they tell you they're going to, they're like, you know, please leave your name here. And we'll call you back. You won't lose your, your line in the queue, your place in the queue. We'll call you back in, you know, 30 to six hours later, right? So this is like an hour later. Now mind you, flight leaving 2 p.m. Eastern standard time.

It's 10 o'clock in the morning. This is the first guy to get on the phone. I've already waited 35 minutes to have him call me back. Now he's explaining to me that they can't get on the flight because they have tickets to San Jose from San Jose, California. As if I did not understand the fucking problem in the first place.

Right, that's why I'm telling. That's why you're calling. Well, listen, this is not necessarily something I can help you with in this department. I'm going to transfer you to the other department. Okay, thanks. Thanks for calling Joe's airline. Have a good day. I'll put you through right now.

Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring. Thank you for calling Joe's airline. Unfortunately, all of our representatives are busy right now. Please leave your name and we'll call you back in 35 to six hours later. So now I've been transferred to another person, you know, someone more sophisticated than whoever gets to the phone the first time, but they're gonna call me back in 35 minutes to six hours later, right?

So now I didn't get transferred right away to somebody. Oh, good. Meanwhile, my poor in-laws are at the fucking airport and they're like, we only have two hours before we get on the for the flight closes Right and we've already wasted one hour just explaining to someone what's going on. So right Hi, this is this is Jenny from Joe's airline Can I speak to mr. Cranes? This is mr. Cranes. I understand your parents are in Your in-laws are in San Jose, California,ia they need to go to sano they take uh... Costa Rica

uh... no jenny this is not at all the problem the problem is there in san Jose Costa Rica they need to get the Atlanta fucking Georgia can you help with that it's that's right here that they're that must have the wrong person because it's that's right here that they're going to see an Jose california to san Jose Costa Rica no no no jenny you got it all wrong is that let me explain to you quickly because time is running out here and a no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no and they're gonna go to San Jose California but now they want to go to Costa Rica. Yeah. Yeah.

How is it going here? You must have been there. Oh, there. And that's what happened to your hair. We should have saved on my hair. That was the thing you pulled it all out. I thought you people want more, more, more, more. What do you want from me? That was how I was born. That was born in this way. So you people want his more more more more more. What do you want for me?

This is how I was born. I was born this way. Gaga told me. Gaga. My son has now decided that he likes the movie Sing, which he calls Ish. Do you know the movie Sing with the character? Yes.

Oh my gosh, Luca. Yeah, my nephew loved that one. Cute movie. But all now we're moved on from Tats to sing, but he can't say sing. So he says, so he runs around. He's like, oh, and now he's, he only wants to listen to the music.

He doesn't want to watch the actual, I mean, sometimes he wants to watch the movie, but he wants to watch, he wants to listen to it on Spotify, right? So I give him the iPad and I have a lock on it so he can just do the Spotify. And for a while there, he'd like the song, the Gaga song, whatever it is. You know, whatever it is. You know, whatever it is. You know, whatever it is. You know, whatever it is.

You know, whatever it is. You know, whatever it is. You know, whatever it is. You know, whatever it is. You know, whatever it is. You know, whatever it is. You know, whatever it is. You know, whatever it is.

You know, whatever it is. You know, whatever it is. You know, whatever it is. You know, whatever it is. You know, whatever it is. You know, whatever it is. You know, whatever it is. You know, whatever it is. You know, whatever it is. You know, whatever it is. You know, whatever it is. You know, whatever it is. And so my son is running around like gah gah gah gah gah gah gah gah gah Da da da da da gah gah gah And I'm like oh you're so sweet.

Cute. So Joe's airline. Okay, back to just six. Yeah, I just had to hide a calm myself that I never heard before. I didn't hear some. I don't know, we took a. Why did we just talk about this?

Because I said this thing. Because you even made a mention of my hair. This is like your hair is fantastic. Your hair is always been the same since I've known you out for 13 years. It's always been not there since I'm watching you. I think it's crawling, I think it's running away of towards the top of my head. No, you think it's been the same? It's the same. It's been the exact same. And I love it. Thank you. And I love yours. You have such a big beautiful mane of hair I wish I for just one day get to have something like that

And just like I like this but since my hair is just gonna look like I'm you know a frizzy mop on top of my head I've decided to just ignore it. I wish for one day I could shake my head. That would just be much easier Tell you what you shave your head Give me that mop a hair yours I'm gonna throw it on my head and for a couple months we we'll just, you know, we'll play podcasts, Switchies. Yeah. Switcher Ruzis. No Givesy Baxies. So Joe's airline.

It takes four of the four, it takes three hours and 59 minutes of the four hours that we have in order to get them on this flight, to get them on this flight. Like they had to call the control hub and the hub. And I'm sure they were talking to the CEO at one point. I'm not even sure what was going on. All this to just get my in laws switched on a flight, you know, from the wrong fucking country I understand. But so, okay, so then now there's a situation

where there's a credit, like there's a credit in the mix, right? So there's a credit and how we apply that credit and where we're gonna use that credit and all this other stuff. And she says, listen, finally there's a supervisor on the phone that has like a lick of common sense, right? And she says, listen, if I try and use this credit right now, I could fuck up this itinerary

and when your parents get to that gate, could be a whole nightmare. So I don't wanna touch the itinerary. So here's the deal. I'm going to give you the $99 per ticket in credit. I'm just going to email it to you after they finish this leg of the trip. And I said, okay, sounds great.

Just as long as they can get on the list. Whatever we need to do, I'm going to get them on the flight. Yes. We wake up this morning and Joe's, and now my parents, my in-laws have been here for a couple days. We wake up this morning and the airline has credited us back every dime that we spent on the original ticket.

So like, I don't think this was something they did because they liked me, because I was quite the fucking cocksucker on them. And I don't usually get a riled up because of their service agents, because I was one, and Icksucker on it. And I don't usually get a riled up with customer service agents, because I was one. And I know how it goes, right? But I am now in a real moral dilemma here about what I do. I mean, we're not talking about a small amount of money.

We're talking about a chunk of change that everyone could use during the pandemic. But now I'm like, hmm, what do I do in this situation? They caused me a lot of headache, but it wasn't their fault. It was my fault. I made the tickets for San Jose, California, not San Jose, Costa Rica. So I'm in a moral dilemma. Do I return this chunk of money? Right? We're also not talking about tens of thousands of dollars, right?

It's certainly not going to hurt the airline if I keep the credit, but I'm wondering what I think $100 or something like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, maybe a thousand, right? Maybe we're talking about a thousand bucks. Right. So now I've got this moral dilemma about what I do with the credit that was given to me, I think erroneously for this flight. What do you think I should do? What would you do? Well, that's tough, because you know, you really kind of want to just roll with it. But you know, yeah, I might call and say, hey, this happened. What do you think to

get agent person? What if I call and I leave them a message? Call and leave them a message saying you'll call them either in 30 minutes to six hours. That's true. What if I just call and I go through that little, you know, you know, if you like a call back, press one, if you'd like to leave a message for an agent, press two. What if I just call and I go through that little, you know, you know, if you like a callback, press one. If you'd like to leave a message for an agent, press two. What if I just leave a message saying the following thing? You'll see the name, email. Yeah. Hey, my name is Brian and you gave me a credit back that I wasn't supposed to get.

So give me a call back. You've got my phone number. Thanks. Bye. Yeah. And I think I've made my effort, right? I mean, no one could fault me. Yeah, exactly.

In good faith, I called back and I explained the situation to them. Yeah. And I think I've made my effort, right? I mean, no one could fault me. In good faith, I called back and I explained the situation to them, because I did. Let me repeat what I said. Hey, it's Brian. I think you gave me a credit back

that I wasn't supposed to get. So call me back. You know my number, bye. I explained the situation, but without wasting their time, I was trying to get to the point as quickly as possible. They have my phone number. Everyone's got call ID, right? They've got my name, Brian.

Yeah, they've got it in the system. I mean, how many Brian's can there be? And they're in this, in the major airline system. Okay, all right, now I understand. I should probably, Hey, it's Brian spelled with a Y. You gave me a credit back by mistake. You've got my phone number. Call me back.

Bye. I might shoot him an email. Go that way. Go that way. Because here's the thing too, I'm thinking is that if you take the credit and run, and then later on, you thank you have a credit, and then you try to use the credit and something happens.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I got you. There's that back end thing. So yeah. So either, I yeah, yeah, yeah. I got you. There's that back end thing, so. Yeah, so either, I mean, listen, I guess it is possible that someone just said these poor guys they had to go through this and they had spent a long time on the phone with us and all this other stuff. You all know what the supervisor? I was on the phone of the supervisor, but I mean, at the end of the call, she explained how

much I was going to get back and she explained the reasoning why. And, you know, I don't know. I don't know. I'm having a little bit of a moral dilemma. As I always do in these type of situations, it's like when the cashier gives you an extra 20 back, right? It's like, oh, but I usually err on the side of good judgment and just say, okay, here's the 20 bucks back

because you know what, I don't wanna be your fucking, you know, no make that took 20 out. And at the end of her shift, she's going to get in trouble or someone's going to come down on her or whatever it is. Sure. I don't think anybody's going to miss that $922 an airline credit, but you never know. Good.

It could be a big deal to them. And maybe the supervisor gets in trouble. So I am going to make my best effort. I am going to email them. Joe at joesairlines.com. I hope I'm spelling that right. What if I computer? That's right. What was it? Shithead at computer. Shithead at shithead. War as a computer. We still get one of those every once in a while.

It's such a like, I don't know. It's such, yeah. I like it as somebody cares enough to do it. I figure that it is. I figure the best part of waking up is going back to bed. That is when you have the best dream. That is for sure. When you wake up and then you go back to sleep. Yes. Wow.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or when you're talking about that recently. when you're just about to fall asleep, when your eyes are like a flutter, and you have that, it's almost like you're not even asleep for a second, but you had a full dream. Right. And I feel like sometimes I have really good ideas in that one second, but I can never catch it.

It was like, I felt good about, let me give you an example, I was with my son. So I'm putting my son to bed right now because my wife's got another handful in the other room. So I go into his room and then we sing a song or we put on the music and then we read a book and then we go to bed. And nine times out at 10, I end up falling asleep there for like 15, 20 minutes because I'm kind of tired from the day and it's like, you know, everyone's calmed down and whatever. Sure. Right as I'm falling asleep. Right as I'm falling asleep. Right, as I'm falling asleep,

I have like some huge breakthrough about the podcast and how we can make it better or my business. And I just need to put these two people together, right? I have it, but it's concrete while it's happening, but then it's nebulous as soon as I open, it's almost like I wake up to remember it, but then I can't remember it, just goes away. It's like, ah, the connection is lost.

Yeah. And I hate that. I wish there was a way to record our dreams, because I think that would it just goes away. It's like, ah, the connection is lost. Yeah. And I hate that. I wish there was a way to record our dreams because I think that would be really fucking cool. That would be, I mean, I would love that. I had a dream about Penelope Cruz a couple nights ago. I wish I could have recorded that dream. Yes.

And I had a right, then I had a third dream about Ryan Seacrest and Brian Dunkelman, all three of us. Roll right in a compromising situation. I'm not compromising. I think he's thinking about rights with characters and people you've been thinking about. I know Jeff's woke up the other morning and had, I guess, had woke it up and then gone back to sleep and then woke back up and he was like, oh my god, I just had the craziest dream. I was producing a play for Neil Young and I know. And all cast of characters and things and so it's kind of a running joke with Jeff and I if we do that we're like,

what movie did you go to? Oh yeah. Kind of like a movie. It's a movie. It is a movie. Yeah, that's it. Yeah. I love dreams. I used to do a dream journal, right? Like I used to do a dream journal and in that way went and I was training myself to remember the dreams because I thought there Should there's got to be some good nuggets in there, right?

But then I found out that my dreams are just a bunch of fucking real nonsense like I'm just like like Yeah, yeah But who knows maybe what maybe the maybe were we're awake when we're dreaming and we were sleeping while we're awake I mean who fucking I know that should blow your mind and I got that shit when I was high and I was deep one time I saw it. I saw it. You're opening up chakras right there. Oh Open up your Vichakra Open up your Vichakra, hopefully and that mean Yeah, open up your Vichakra, hopefully okayly, and that means... Yeah, open up your Vachakra, Huddly.

Okay, Henry. Sorry, man. You know, just... Guys got it. Heart wants what the heart wants. I know. You're really attracted to Huddly, huh? Oh, man.

I had a dream about Huddly the other night, too. I don't even want to know what it was about. Eating involved a couple of farm animals. I don't know. And an oil pan. An oil pan. Yeah, the kind you put in your card. Don't ask me. It's my dreams, man. Okay, my Henry. Let's talk to you later. I know what you can do with that credit. You can buy a banner at. Okay, bye. Okay, bye. We have podcasting in a verse. Are we here to help your ego? So listen to this. This is a perfect segue into what I want to talk about. So I experimented with a lot.

I say a lot. I experimented with hallucinogens for some part of my life, right? Mushrooms, LSD mainly, and then DMT at some point, which is the, yeah, which is no joke. That's not, it's nothing to be trifled with, right? The DMT is insane. I haven't tried that one. And I won't explain how I got it, because I just don't think it's a relevant. Explain how I got it.

I don't think I would either. I don't even know why I had to qualify it. Like, I'm just not knowing to explain it. Why do I have to say that I'm not gonna say that? Exactly who I got it from. And you can call this number. I can almost hear the audience going, what kind of DMT did you get?

Where did you get it in? Give me a call. Okay, Henry. So when obviously when you take hallucinogens, for those of you who have not out there, when you take hallucinogens, for those of you who have not out there, when you take hallucinogens, you see here and do things that you have never heard seen or done before.

It attaches, some people say, some scientists believe that it starts to connect the neurons and the electrical impulses in your brain, the same ones that are there when you're sleeping and when you're dreaming, it connects them while you're awake. Because those neural passages close when you're awake, allowing you to function and allowing time and space, the conceptual time and space and all this

to be processed in your mind, because that's how you function as a human being. If you didn't have the concept of time of space in your head, you would be fucked living in the world we live in, because we live in a past, present, future world, right? But when you take some hallucinogens, some types of hallucinogens, mainly LSD and DMT, though, mushrooms does have a similar effect. Sometimes, it breaks down those walls.

So now the whole world is kind of coming at you in a weird or way. You don't have a, depending on how high you are, you don't have a concept of space or time, or it can start to bleed together. And so you get some really funky experiences. Some people call them spiritual experiences, and I would consider them spiritual experiences, right? No, why they just popped on my screen. I would call them, I would call it them spiritual experiences, right? I don't know why they just popped on my screen.

I would call them, I would call it a spiritual experience, no doubt, in some cases. In other cases, I just ended up running around my front yard and my underwear and things didn't end up so great for me. Or chasing down the rovers next door. Right. One time I ended up, I swear to God, healthy. One time I ended up mowing my lawn in my underwear high on LSD when I was like 16 years old

and my dad was out of town. And it was like six, 45, seven in the morning, you know when no one wants to hear your fucking lawn more and it's a quiet neighborhood, it's not like we live on a busy street, we live in a cul-de-sac, a mile away from any street, right? And so I was out there, you know, done it,

and I had put my speaker outside that window of the house and I was blaring the music and I was, oh, I'm going alone. And I was like, apologizing to the grass for killing it. I was like, I'm sorry, dude. I then stuff the video was gonna ask you like, how did you think about that when you were on the LSD?

Cause I would think you wouldn't wanna kill the grass. Like, hurt the grass. I didn't wanna hurt the grass Because I would think you wouldn't want to kill the grass. Like, hurt the grass. I didn't want to hurt the grass. I was like, it wasn't about hurting the grass. It's that I knew that the grass had to be broken in order to regrow. That's how it all works. You have to be split in half and then you regrow better

than ever. It was like the whole thing. Meanwhile, I've got Beethoven's 9th Symphony blaring out the window. If it wasn't for my neighbor who kindly walked over and was like, Hey, Brian, and I was like, Hey, Mr. You know, Snoopy snoop's what's going on? And he's like, I think you should probably go inside and I was like, What? And he's like, I think you should put us going side now. Let's go inside. He was like, I was like, I know where he was like, bless your heart.

He's like, let me finish up the grass for you. Thanks, Mr. Schnuby Schnub. No problem. You're in your underrues with your small little man boner running around the front yard, talking to the grass. Not a good look. Right. Let me help you out here, Brian.

So when you're in those states, you come up with some pretty crazy nutty stuff. So I bring this all around to say that I read an article, a guy wrote a theorist, like one of these guys, right? It just thinks about things for the sake of thinking about him's a lot smarter than any of us will ever be. And he thinks about shit. And he likes to break it, deconstruct it,

and think about the norms, and tell them, down man, right? And he wrote a piece that blew my fucking mind. And I asked this question when I was 15 years old, high on LSD, high on yellow sunshine, Molly, blotter paper, if you know what I mean, ho, they yellow school bus, or whatever it was called, Jesus Christ, whatever they used to give the, the acid names.

So that, you know, you get higher, I guess. I don't know. I got that Jesus Christ, man, if you want it. That was, and I was like, that Jesus Christ is here. The Jesus Christ is in town, guys. We got to buy it. We got to get it. We got to get it.

I thought about what if two plus two never really equaled four and they're just telling us that's one of the equals Right, and so this guy wrote a paper. HODLY and that's exactly what the paper said It said how do we know one plus one equals two? It's just something that was made up what if science and math was wrong and I was like holy shit Like this it I had a flashback instantaneously. I was like in my basement, 15 years old, listening to, you know, the doors and like, bin, and in, and in,

what if they're just lying to us? What if it's, how do we know one plus one is two? How do you know? How do you know for real? Well, it's agreed upon and there's also mathematics and science are real, like things in the universe. So.

Like you gotta be, like you gotta be harsh into my vibe, man. But it could be relative, you know? I mean, it could be relative. But one in one is too, because someone made it up, right? Someone said one in one is too. What if one in one is really three? It could be.

You don't agree with me, do you? No. I thought you were going to roll with me on this one. But I liked the thought process going on with it. That's fun. I think that, you know. I think math is the universal language. I thought love was the universal language.

That is too. Maybe that's why we have a difference of opinion on this particular topic. It's because I believe that love is the universal language. I do too. Go to school. Go to school. And you think science is the universal language. And science is the universal language.

I think we can all agree. I'm right on this. You are. Go, snow. I feel like. Hope I'll with you on it. I'll be like every time I say that, like that Gustavo, we should have like a little picture of Stavo popping up on the side of the screen.

Gustavo, hola. Gustavo meme. A Gustavo meme. We no. Gustavo meme. Gustavo meme. We need a Gustavo meme. I'm going to put a link to this article because the other was really fascinating. And I actually do. He's a relative theorist. I've got to read this though. I've got to read this though. Yeah. And you should read it. And why I bring it all back around to hallucinogens is because this group of people who are doing these kind of crazy outrageous, you know, type of thinking and a lot of quantum physicists and people who are doing these kind of crazy, outrageous, you know, type of thinking and a lot of quantum physicists and people who are working on robots and applied mathematics and all sorts of stuff.

In California, especially, are starting to get into a trend called micro-dosing. Mm-hmm, yes. Micro-dosing is basically when you take a smaller amount of a hallucinogen like LSD because it does break down those walls and allows you to think in a different way, to solve problems, to come up with new solutions, to think about things in not relatively, but unrelatively, right? Like in a completely different angle. And I completely am behind this.

Like I think this is an incredible use of drugs and intelligence. Yeah. I wish we could find a reason to take a lot of different stuff. I wish we could give our pilots speed. We used to, now we're curing depression with ecstasy, and now we've got our scientists, they're all taking, not all of them, but some of them are taking LSD to think about things and get them outside of the box.

In this concept, I understand personally, because as one of the great thinkers of our time, I also, I mean, we can all agree on that. That's... We can. That's a universe. Well, we can agree is that Brian Green is one of the greatest thinkers of his generation. Yes. I didn't say which generation, but I said, a generation. I am the greatest thinker of the year 2025 BC. But I, I like this out of the box thinking that people are doing

and bringing this narrative that is so familiar to me, because when I was just experimenting with it as a young man, I saw how much that could open up your mind. And I always used to think to myself, like, wow, these straight-laced mother-fuckers just don't know. They're not getting it. They're not part of it. They don't get, you know, they don't get how it can change your mind. Things are different. I love everybody. And, you know, I forgot to go to work today, but that's okay. Because you know, it doesn't really matter.

All the trees are breathing with me. Right. Oliver Stone, I'm reading his autobiography right now. Oh my God, that guy's probably got some fucking stories. And he does his dad with a LSD without his dad knowing. He does his dad without his dad knowing? He does his dad without his dad knowing. Oh, he's not a bad guy. He's not a bad guy. He's not a bad guy. He's not a bad guy.

He's not a bad guy. He's not a bad guy. He's not a bad guy. He's not a bad guy. He's not a bad guy. He's not a bad guy. He's not a bad guy. He's not a bad guy.

He's not a bad guy. He's not a bad guy. I was reading this part of the book. I thought, wow. Wow. That is a chance. Because like, all of us don't just want to really like exactly what you're saying. You know, show him, show him, open up your mind. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But let me ask you this. Now, was this, oh, this is back in the 60s.

So he did this to his dad when he was like a young man. Yeah, like a dog. Fuck, dumb man. If I were to dose my dad, are you fucking kidding me now? No, no, no. I need a shoe on dad. kidding me now? I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, know, I know, it. He caught on that I was dosing myself and to say, you're going home, it's just not mine. I'll give you a ride wherever you are.

Yeah. Yeah. My dad was at the kitchen the other night. And this is, I tell this story. I love my father, we have a great relationship now. Everything's great. So, but I tell this story that I've been telling this story I love my father, we have a great relationship now. Everything's great. But I tell this story that,

I've been telling this story for years in kind of a joking way that, my dad kicked me out of the house a couple of different times, but he kicked me out of the house once. He took me to a Wendy's. He bought me a burger. He sat me down and he's like, I'm sorry, you can't come back to the house.

And I'm like, he's like, I'm sorry, you can't come back to the house. And I'm like, what? He's like, I'm sorry. Wendy's, you may have gone to like, how? They can't house us. House, steak house, I was probably triple on acid. Like a last meal. I was probably dozed myself. Even I was like, like my chesher cat eyes, like,

woo! Right. Yeah. Do not confuse them. He's a burger. Hey, Dach. He doesn burger it don't come back. Open up your French fried chocolate, dad. Can I have a baked potato with no bacon?

No, bacon. I don't want to slaughter no swan. So he says, you know, sorry, but you know, things aren't working out. It's don't worry. It's me. It's not you. You know, you can't come back. And at the don't worry, it's me, it's not you. You know, you can't come back. And at the time, it was a young man

that was devastating news. But in all defense of my father, I was a straight out of Compton fuck up. I could not have been more of a shithead at that time if I tried. And so I've been telling the story that my dad left me at a wind, keeping out of the house, left me at a wind. But at least he paid for the burger and my dad, he got so angry with me in the

kitchen. That's angry. But he like snap back. He's like, son, I did not leave you with the Wendy's. I asked you if you wanted to ride home. And you said, no, he just blocked out of the Wendy. If you wanted to ride somewhere, it just wasn't, it just wasn't where you wanted to go. And I said, you were like, you said no out of principle. I know. I'm like, I don't need anything else from you. You bought me the burger. That's it. That's all right. Meanwhile, yeah, he said that I went to the pay phone in the corner, called somebody, and

he drove, yeah, pay phone. That's how long ago this was. And he drove by and he was like, you sure you don't want to ride? No. No! I'm gonna leave with the clothes on my back and my dignity. Hi. Could I have a dollar for the bus, Dad? Ha! Ha! And for the paper, Bob.

Could you call me an Uber? For orders. Oh my God, those were the days when he had to get it. So, you know, to say all this, like, I'm super encouraged to that. We're now getting to a point where we can kind of, you know, think about these things a little bit differently. Like, back in the day, when I was experiencing with LSD, it was just, you were just being a royal fuck up.

And I was, there was no doubt about it. I'm not encouraging 16-year-olds to do LSD, but now the greatest minds of our time, including myself, are thinking about things differently. Yes. Oh my God, that's too funny. I love it. No, I'm on board with it too. I'm on board with the microdosing and the experimentation of

just different ways. Hey, I mean, your brain, what do they say? There's something about, we only use what, 10% or something of our brain? Yeah. Seven, personally, I think is what they say. Seven, I was gonna say seven at first, but okay, so a small percentage is the point. And, you know, if we can help unlock our brain's full potential or part more than seven or 10% at least, I'm all for it.

I'd like to think that everybody out there is unlocking some of their potential just by listening to the commercial break. I think you automatically unleashing your potential. Open up your brain. I love me some Gustavo. I love me some Gustavo. So this is what we're going to do. We're going to wrap it up here. We're going to take it to the after show, or we'll continue this conversation. If you want a chance to get in on the cool masks that we have, then all you got to do is

you got to go to the commercial break on Insta, follow us, and then we'll be giving it away sometime in the upcoming week. We'll run a little contest. We might ask for people to do something funny, like on video or something. I don't know. You know, engagement. We're trying to get some in user engagement. Lots of people listen to us, but no one engages with us. So I'm either, I'm taking that a little bit personally now, hopefully, taking it personally. Ha, ha, ha, ha.

Aw. Do you want six or seven more un-engaged subscribers? No, Henry, I've done spending money with you. You fucked me on the banner, I had you screwed me on the computer. Now you're uglling my co-host, she's married. Not for long. Gustafum. No. Ha, ha, ha. Not for long. Gustafum. Tcbpodcast.com is where you can go to sign up to the break room and with the break

room you'll get all of the after shows. That's once a week actually. We're going to do it after each episode now. We're just going to do an after show rather than a newsletter because we think that no one really cares about a newsletter because we asked ourselves the hard question. Do we really give a shit about a newsletter? Another newsletter. Another newsletter. And no, we don't.

But if you had an extra 15 or 20 minutes of the show, each week would that be valuable? And, you know, let us know. Let us know. Let us know. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Let's info at tcbpodcast.com or you can go to the website.

You can drop us a comment. Also, we're still listening, still listening, parody song, sound clips, audio bites, things that you make, that you own, that you would like to share on air, send them to me, and who knows? You could end up being a bit at the beginning of the show. I have one. You do.

Oh, you do, that's right. You do. We have our very first parody song, and I can't wait to play it. Yeah, I don't think, we're not gonna play it this time, want to I was gonna say we could put it at the beginning of the show Is one of the bits, but I'd rather talk about it as we go because it's extra. It's extra. I'm just gonna put it that way. It's extra. It is extra. It's extra. Who is that guy? He's just show up in your life.

Oh no, I knew it. We'll talk about it later. Okay, sounds good. Maybe we'll talk about it on the after show, TCPPodcast.com and join the break room. And next week you get to watch all of these episodes live... recorded live.

Recorded live on YouTube. I love when they used to say like, this show has been, you know, recorded in front of a live studio audience. And it's like, what, who's recording in front of a dead studio audience? I guess they mean it wasn't a laugh track. So, you know what I mean, holey.

I know what you mean, bruh. Sorry, I got you. I've been microdosing. OK, on to next week, we'd like to thank you for listening to the commercial break from Chrissy Holi and Brian Green to all of you out there. Open up your Vichakra. Open up your Vichakra's to us.

And we will see you next week. Love you too. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye! on Spotify, iHeart Media, Apple, Google and all major podcast providers. The commercial break is a great middleweight production, written and produced by Brian Greene, co-hosted by Chrissy Hothley. You