The Commercial Break - Health, Wealth & A Paladium Ping-Pang!

Episode Date: May 21, 2025

EP #751: Bryan and Krissy review the proliferation of Alien Light Ladies (and guys) across the socials. It seems every other reel is talking in tongues and selling a course on aligning your inner star child! In this wide-ranging, off-the-rails episode of The Commercial Break, Bryan and Krissy start with preschool graduations and end up in the intergalactic rabbit hole of light language influencers. Buckle up. More About EP751: Bryan opens with a hilariously detailed recap of attending a preschool “graduation” where kids practiced their choreography for months… only to immediately collapse, cry, strip, or play dead the moment they hit the stage. Krissy and Bryan swap stories about the madness of modern school ceremonies, audience weirdos, and what happens when parents start crisscross-applesaucing in a sweaty multipurpose room. But halfway through, the episode swerves hard into the stratosphere—literally. Bryan introduces a new obsession: a subculture of TikTok and Instagram influencers claiming to speak alien light languages. These spiritual content creators, often scantily clad and surrounded by rose petals, offer $10,000 courses to “activate your Palladian power” and speak in made-up cosmic tongues. Bryan and Krissy watch and roast a collection of these videos in real time, trying to decode phrases like “divine abundance,” “sacred soul blueprint,” and “cosmic wealth activation”—and trying even harder not to cry from laughing. TCB Clips: R.I.P. "Norm"!! Watch EP #751 on YouTube! Text us or leave us a voicemail: [phone]TCB FOLLOW US: Instagram:  ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@thecommercialbreak⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Youtube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠youtube.com/thecommercialbreak⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@tcbpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.tcbpodcast.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ CREDITS: Hosts: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Bryan Green⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ &⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Krissy Hoadley⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Executive Producer: Bryan Green Producer: Astrid B. Green Voice Over: Rachel McGrath TCBits / TCBits Music: Written, Voiced and Produced by Bryan Green To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Hey Mr. Peterson, what's the story? Boy meets beer, boy drinks beer, boy gets another beer. How are you today Mr. Peterson? Never been better, Woody. Just once I'd like to be better. I got good news everybody. I'm no longer looking for a job. Now begging for one. Hey!

Hey, everybody. Norm! How you doing, Norm? What do you know? Had enough. Good afternoon, everybody. Good morning. Hey, what's happening, Norm? It's a dog-eat-dog world, Sammy, and I'm wearing milk bone underwear. Laughter Music Boooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Some of them are Palladians. Some of them are more generic alien light language girls.

Yes. The Palladians... But the Palladians is a species of aliens? It's a species of aliens and they believe that they've been dropped down here on Earth and they've co-mingled, co-mated with humans. Okay, that's how the hybrid happens. That's the hybrids happening and that if you're a Palladian then you will activate when you hear certain languages. And you will activate... you hear certain languages. And you will activate... Your Palladian penis. Your Palladian penis.

Your Palladian penis will come alive. And then all of a sudden you're gonna have wealth and abundance? Is that what it is? Because the old wealth and abundance trick. That's how they get you. That's how they get you. The next episode of The Commercial Break starts now. Yeah, boy!

Oh yeah, cats and kittens, welcome back to the Commercial Break. I'm Brian Green. This is my dear friend and co-host of this show, Chris Joy Hoadley. Best to you, Chris. Best to you, Brian. Best to you out there in the podcast universe. How the hell are you? Thanks for joining us. It was a big day around the household as many of the children graduated from their respective non-graduating ages.

Right. Non-graduating classes. Some ceremonial things happen. Ceremonial shit. That means I gotta wake up entirely too early, sit through entirely too long of a ceremony. But man, are they cute. They are cute.

Are they cute? I find myself being very cheesy during these things.'m dancing with them I'm encouraging him I'm like because any parent of any young kid will know this is that they practice this shit like all year long they start at the literally the first day of school here we have a big thing at the end of the year and so here we go you know happy duty down deep clap his little pansies happy duty down deep, clap his little pansies, happy duty down deep, put his little feet, you know, whatever it is. And they all, you know, stomp their feet and clap their hands and do little motions

above their head. And you know how it goes. I do. And so they practice every day for the entire year for like 262 goddamn days is now the school year. They do this and then this long break yes and then weeks long breaks they come home and they say play that song so I can they're doing it in the kitchen and everything and it's so cute and you're like they're gonna kill it this is what my kid is Taylor Swift incarnate. Well Michael Jackson in the works and then that second they walk out on that well it's not even a stage we're just it's just like a hall where they're at and

they've taped off a little area and put a backdrop, and the second those kids walk out there it's like, ah! Is that a stage fright? Ah! So the principal, who we know is a very lovely lady, she comes out and she's like, okay, now we're going to bring out the very little ones first, and because they are very scared of loud noises, let's not scare them. I'm going to be very upset if you scare them."

And there's like 250 people, grandmas, moms, dads, uncles, aunts, friends of the family, and weird creepers who just found their way into the room. The cavalry is out. Yes, the cavalry is out. We've all come out and called Caffeine High, all of us, right? Was the 530 guy there? 530! No, but I'll tell you, I'll tell you about, there's always strange ones in the crowd, anywhere you go, and I'll explain there was a few.

So we get the front row because Astrid is involved in the school, and I don't want to give away too many details, but Astrid's involved in the school, so we managed to score. And by the way, this is a hot ticket. Like, if you don't get there 40 minutes early, you're not gonna have a chair anywhere where you can see your child. But what is permissible, and what does happen, is that if your child's class comes out, then you can run up to the front, sit down in front of them, Indian style. Right?

I don't know what they call that, crossy leggies or whatever it is, you know, crisscross applesauce. That's crisscross applesauce. And that's obnoxious to see a bunch of 30, 40 year olds crisscross applesauce. It just is, I'm sorry. But I understand, cause I did it too. The first couple of years, my kids were at this school.

We did not know the gig. So we always had a shitty parking spot and we'd have to stand in the back of the hall and then run up crisscross applesauce when the kids came out or when our, we had one kid at the time. So we now we have front row seats because Astrid's like a queen over at that school. She does a million fucking things for all those kids and the teachers and stuff like that. So we have the whole front row there and, and

Look at you, VIP. front row there and, and I'm vipping it over at the pre-K. Right. Yeah. At the little darlings preschool. That's right. Little darlings growth and development preschool, or whatever it's called. So principal gives us the warning before the show start.

Now I've been to like six of these already. So I already know this is going to be a two hour long event. And there are only five classes in the entirety of the school. Each kid's classroom comes out and they do like five songs, excuse me, three to four songs, right? And there's between five and 12 kids in each class. So the first kids come out, we're talking two and three year olds, right? Two and three year olds come out. There's five of them. They all come out. They are all deer in the headlights, frozen.

No one, you could hear a pin drop. No one in the audience says a word. It's like hushed, it's like hushed hooray. We're all like, good job. Oh, okay, yeah. Good job. Yeah, and everybody's not just sitting there stone face. Yeah, but I gotta be honest.

I'm that age and people are just whispering at me from the crowd, and I'm more scared than I would be if you'd just go ahead and yell at me. I know. Do you know what I'm saying? Just give me a little encouragement. Yes. So here they are. They're all like there in the headlights like this.

Song starts, first kid drops to the floor. Somatic response to stress. He drops to the floor, he rolls over, he lays down. He's taking a nap. He wants to take a nap. He played, he kind of did the play dead. He played dead. That's what he did. He's like a roly poly. He just rolled off and just laid on the floor. Yeah. Look, cutest little girl in the corner. She didn't make it three seconds in the song. Ah, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy runs off into the crowd. Right? So now there's one, there's three left. There's one girl who's kind of trying to make it work. Two teachers who are acting like complete buffoons, you know, doing all of the motions,

trying to, yeah, poor ladies. I mean, listen, I say buffoon, not in a bad way. They're just trying their best to get these kids to do anything. Like show them that I've worked on the, on you at all this year, please. I need a job next year. Show me that I can do something. Third kid runs backwards into the, uh, into the backdrop and plants his face back there. He's just now he's won't face the crowd. So now we got one girl, one boy,

one girl kind of doing a little bit of a dance and the one boy just staring off into the sunset. He doesn't want to look at anybody. He's making no eye contact whatsoever. And I swear to God, I just feel like, I feel for all of this, because I've been there, I've done it, I've watched my kid freeze. Yes, I remember you saying.

Yes, I've watched my kid do it in the kitchen as if they are, you know, as if it's the American Music Awards, like professional lighting, stage, stage direction. They've done the whole thing. And then they get out there and they can't remember to breathe. Like, I mean, that's it. So now we've got one girl's kind of trying, and we've got one kid deer in the headlights.

And so I feel for him. So he's kind of turning his head left and right, and we make eye contact. And I'm like... You got this. I got, you got this. Because I know I have that goofy face the kids like. I just do.

I know I've got that kind of clownish, oh, he could be dangerous, but he's kind of funny. Look at those ears on that guy. Look at those ears on that guy. Look at the ears on that guy. That's kind of cool. I like that. So I go, you got this. Chrissy, the kid screams, he cries,

he runs into the crowd. He doesn't even know where his parents are. He just runs into the crowd. The teacher is trying to stop him. So now we've got one soldier left. That's it, one soldier amongst all of them. And the teachers- At this point, it's gotta be about done.

No, we're not even one minute into the first song. Well, the teachers are like trying to wrangle them up and stuff too, like, you know, trying to put them back on stage. The one kid just refused to get off the floor. Literally they were, he was like, he was playing dead. Like they were trying to yank him up to get him on his pants.

There was one girl who pulled down her pants He was playing dead. Like they were trying to yank him up to get him on his pants. There was one girl who pulled down her pants and she was crying. And she was like, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh. And I was laughing so hard. I was laughing so hard. You can't, they're so cute. Because Gustavo's in town here to... Gustavo.

Gustavo. Gustavo. Gustavo. Gustavo. Gustavo. Gustavo. Because Gustavo's in town and he's sitting next to me and we are just, it's a good time. Yeah, it's entertaining, I'm sure.

But I'm going to give a couple of hints and tricks and tips to the parents who in the future will be going through this. I agree, you should be allowed to get up close when your kid's doing this. It's not my kid, so I don't really need to see, but it's inefficient that we just change seats every time a class comes in, you know what I'm saying? For everyone to shuffle seats to make sure everyone's got the front row seat when your kid's up there. So I don't mind the whole crisscross applesauce thing, you got to get up there, at least you can get the video to show the grandparents or whatever. But I was sitting in the front

row, meaning there was no chairs in front of me, and so it was me and then the stage. That's it. And then what about the, were the crisscross applesauce people in front of me. And so it was me and then the stage. That's it. And then what about the, were the Chris Kross applesauce people in front of you? Not only were they in front of me, they're sitting on my feet. And there is so much room in front of me. I mean, it just was like kind of silly.

Like you don't have to sit with your back against my knees. Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah. I don't know. Give me a little space. Yeah, give me a little space. To the point where one lady, like this happened five times during the show, five different people sitting right directly in front of me.

All of them did the same thing. All of them extraordinarily close, like literally their backs against my knees. And one lady sat. Did you start to braid somebody's hair? Well, one lady sat on my shoe and I started poking her in the butt. I was like, bink, bink, bink, bink, bink. Well, one lady sat on my shoe, and I started poking her in the butt.

I was like, pink pink pink pink pink. Yeah, moving my toes. Yeah, but she was, you know, there was a lot, there was cushion there, and I don't think she felt what was going on, but I thought to myself, like, this is just a little too close for, we're all friendly here,

but a little too close for comfort. Let's get going. Like, you know, you can move up 30, you can move in 30 centimeters would be okay. Give my feet a little room to breathe. That was a little ridiculous. And then the other thing is, is like when we get there and there's this hall,

and I already know the drill, there are gonna be entirely too few seats for entirely too many people. And there's a lot, and everybody wants, it's a long thing. You do not want to stand for two hours during this. And there's a hallway full of extra chairs, stacked up, full of extra chairs. So I go, I see a guy take one of the extra chairs

to go in the back, and I think to myself, okay, that's a good idea. I already know there's going to be plenty more people than seats. Let me look at a few of these tough guys around here and let's all start a chain and let's get it going and we'll put a few extra rows in the back. There's plenty of chairs.

Like, let's make sure that everyone can take a seat. And so I go over there. I'm not necessarily directing traffic, but kind of directing traffic, right? And these seats are wooden and they're really heavy. So I'm pulling one, I give it to a guy. I pull one, I give him a second chair. Two chairs. That's good. You're good. Two chairs. It's a very heavy thing. Meanwhile, I don't know, Biff Johnson comes over and he's like, I'm just going to get the stack. It's like five chairs. And I go, oh, okay, all right, go for that. Yeah. Literally cannot move the stack one inch. He's like, he's trying, he's trying too hard for too long

because now he knows kind of what a dumb dumb he looks like. Yeah, like, okay, bro, hey, if I thought you could just, you know, fling a stack of chairs and over into the other room, then I would have done that in the first place. But they're heavy chairs, two is enough. You don't need to be a tough guy. So you know what he did?

He ended up taking a stack of two chairs and moving them there. And I'm like, okay, all right. Do it your way. Yeah, so okay. So then I- They're wooden chairs though. I'm kind of hung up on this for a minute

because I remember in school having like, the small like plastic ones with the butt carve out and like some metal legs. I don't want to give away too much because I care about the safety of my family and I don't know who's out there listening. But the hall is a place where very nice wooden chairs would be appropriate. Let's put it that way. Like nice solid wooden chairs. So these aren't like the kids' chairs? No, no, no, no, no.

Oh, I was thinking. The school is on one side of the building and on the other side of the building is a, it's used for something completely different. But we get, but once or twice a year, the school. I'm picturing a school and like the kids' chairs. No, no, no, no, no. Like stacks of kids' chairs.

The school does have kids' chairs, but this place has wooden chairs, right. Nice wooden chairs for the kids chairs. No, no, no, no, no. Like stacks of kids chairs. The school does have kids chairs, but this place has wooden chairs, right. Nice wooden chairs for the kids. Right, so I grabbed, then, okay, now I think we've got enough chairs for two rows. I grab two chairs, I go walk over there, and that same guy is just like standing in the middle of this, like the row that I have to get by

to put these chairs down, and I'm standing there looking at him and he's standing there looking at me and I go, Oh, excuse me. Can you, you know, Chrissy, he didn't even like, didn't even acknowledge on his face that he had heard what I'd said, but he's like looking directly at me. I know he's not deaf because we just had a conversation. Like I'm, I don't know what's going on. So he doesn't move. Another guy recognizes what's going on here, walks around the guy and says, hand me the chair. And I have to hand the chair around the guy who's standing in the

middle of the row, not moving for what reason I can't imagine. Why was he standing? Because I thought he grabbed two chairs. I don't know. Maybe he used all his possible testosterone to try and lift those five chairs into the air and now he's on a break. His brain's on a break? I don't know. I don't know. He's on a break, I guess.

I'm not sure. I don't know. It was like a really silly and weird thing. Party's over. Everyone's done. Ice cream truck outside, which was a nice added touch this year. Let's go get some ice.

By the way, in years past, like when we first started taking, our kid went to this school, they would do this outside. And in May, you're really rolling the dice. Yeah, you are. It could be chilly, it could be raining, but it's likely just going to be fucking hot. Hot. Yeah, and everyone's going to be dressed nicely, sweating their potatoes off. So I'm glad that we at least got the inside part, and the ice cream truck is a nice addition.

But anyway- Was it the milk and cereal truck? I wish it was the milk and cereal truck. Isn't that an ice cream truck? Oh, yeah. I passed it, you know? It's parked like at this business that's down the street from where I live. Oh really? That's when I took the picture. Because I'm like, there's an actual milk and cereal truck.

That's a thing now. They make ice cream out of it and cereal. You know, like a little offshoot here, there was a trend, I wanna say like back in the mid. Or maybe it's cereal and cream, that's what it is. Cereal and cream, that's right. Yes. Yes. It was a trend.

Your choice for late night snacks. Hey, if you're gonna put cereal and ice cream together, my new thing is cookies and whipped cream. So I can't drink half and half anymore at the levels I was drinking it at, so now I just put whipped cream. Do whipped cream. So I can't drink half and half anymore at the levels I was drinking it at. So now I just put whipped cream. Yeah, whip it. I put whip it all over my cookies.

I get high. So there was a trend in the mid 2000s in the aughts where they were opening up cereal shops. Do you remember this? Like walls of different kinds of cereal and people would go in in the morning or the afternoon and they would put cereal in a bowl and whatever kind of milk they wanted

and they'd pay $5 endless all you could eat. I don't think that ever took off really, but I remember they opened a couple in New York and one in Los Angeles. I thought that was- Like a cereal boutique. Yeah, I thought that was an interesting idea, not one that warranted an entire restaurant in

Manhattan, but an interesting idea nonetheless. That's a college town kind of thing. If you did that in a college town, you'd probably never go out of business. That's true. All right. So party's over. Everyone's done. Thank you very much.

You know, tears and happiness and mainly because it's done and now we get to go home. And by the way, my kids killed it. They killed it. They killed it. They were the, they danced, they sang, they knew their motions, they knew their movements. Yeah. I was really proud of them. But this is also not their first rodeo doing this.

So I think they were, they were prepped for this. So we get done. And then the same Biff Henderson, all of a sudden. Biff. Yeah, by the way, I'm standing in the front, so when it's over, the front where I'm standing gets very crowded because now this is the open space. So now everybody is crowded the open space to get their kids to say goodbye to their friends, have a happy summer, thank you to the teachers, all this other stuff.

So it's very crowded where I am, and I understand that. I'm just trying to kind of maneuver to get out, but I'm not going anywhere because no one's going anywhere. And then all of a sudden I notice right behind me, and I mean like breathing down my neck is Biff Henderson. The same guy who was standing in the middle, the same guy. Your nemesis at the ceremony.

Yeah, my nemesis at the ceremony. And now I'm like, do we have a thing here? But I don't know because I'm not man enough to know. You know, like I don't have that kind of vibe, you know? But I do wonder, do we have a thing here? Should I be worried that he's gonna snap my neck from behind? Is this Jean-Claude Van Damme film? Do I need to stand up on the chair?

Bloodsport. Bloodsport, do I need to grab one of these heavy wooden chairs and just hit him over the head with it? I don't know. And I'm a little bit nervous that now I've got this guy just literally drooling down the back of my hairline. And so I think to myself, geez, just give me a little bit of room, buddy.

He's got like his chest up against my back. And I'm like, it's not that tight in here. You've been hitting from all sides, the back, the front, your legs. It's weird. It's like no personal space here. And I don't- You've been hidden from all sides, the back, the front, your legs. It's weird. It's like no personal space day at the pre-K. You know what I'm saying? I don't know.

Honestly, I sound like I'm complaining. It's not that big of a deal. I don't give a shit, but I kind of give a shit. Like I don't want somebody up on my back. That part, if you're going to, if you have to sit in front of me, okay, I understand. Don't sit on my shoes though. That's a little, but again, I don't know that she really even knew. I honestly don't.

Um, but if you're gonna, if you're gonna be like, in my back, don't be against my back. Yeah, that's strange. You know when you're too close to somebody's back. Yes. And that reminded me of a few times when like you go to the grocery store, you're waiting in line at like a Six Flags or a Disney World, and there's just that person

that's a little bit too fucking close, like aggressively close. They're angry for some reason and they're ready to pounce on you. And so they're going to let you know by standing very close, kind of like when I'm driving down the street and I am one and a half feet from your bumper, because you have a do a student driver sticker on your fucking car. That's right. Anyway, kids are done.

Now we move into the summer. So expect to hear lots more screaming and yelling, school's out for summer, school's out for ever. What a cock rock anthem that was. However, one of the best beginnings to any movie with that song has got to be... Uh... Uh... Uh... Uh...

Uh... Uh... Dazed and Confused. I was waiting for you to say it, but you didn't say it. Dazed and Confused. Yeah, you know, that's true. They do have it at the beginning of that movie. And I need to re-watch that movie.

Everybody needs to re-watch that movie. Yeah, I haven't seen it in a while. It's high time we watch that movie again. It is high time. We'll be here all week and we'll be right back to talk about TCB's endless day. Stay tuned. Okay, you're probably wondering why I, Rachel, have taken over the voice duties at TCB. It's pretty simple.

Astrid asked me to shut Brian up, even for a minute. Well, lovely Astrid, your wish is my command. Do you want to help Astrid too? You know you do. Leave a message for her, or me, or Chrissy, at 212-433-3TCB. That's 212-433-3822. You can be on the show too. Just call and say something, anything,

or text us and we'll text you right back, promise. Then head over to tcbpodcast.com and get your free sticker. It's your constitutional right to a sticker and we must abide. You get the point. Follow us on Instagram at The Commercial Break and watch all the episodes on video at youtube.com slash The Commercial Break. Best to you and Astrid, especially Astrid.

Spring is here and you can now get almost anything you need delivered with Uber Eats. What do we mean by almost? You can't get a well-groomed lawn delivered, but you can get chicken parmesan delivered. Sunshine? No. Some wine? Yes. Get almost, almost anything delivered with Uber Eats. I'm Emma Greed and I've spent the last 20 years building, running and investing in some incredible businesses. I've co-founded a multi-billion dollar unicorn and had my hand in several other companies

that have generated hundreds and hundreds of millions of dollars. The more success I've had, the more people started coming to me with questions. How do you start a business? How do you raise money? How do I bounce back from failure? So it got me thinking, why not just ask the people I aspire to the most?

How did they actually do what they do? I'm so incredibly lucky to know some of the smartest minds out there. And now I'm bringing their insights along with mine, unfiltered, directly to you. On my new podcast, Aspire with Emma Greed, I'll dive into the big questions everyone wants to know about success in business and in life. Through weekly conversations, you'll get the tangible tools, the real no BS stories, and undeniable little hacks that actually help you level up.

Listen to and follow Aspire with Emma Greed, an Odyssey podcast available now, wherever you get your podcasts. I saw a very interesting reel the other day that I think I have to share and we have to have a conversation about. Now, before this gets started, I shared this with Gustavo, Gustavo about. Now, before this gets started, I shared this with Gustavo, Gustavo, and Astrid last night, and Astrid's like, great, everyone's going to think that you and I hate each other. That is not the truth. I just want to preface this, you'll understand in a second. I just want to preface this by saying Astrid and I do not hate each other. This is not why I'm sharing this. I'm sharing this, this is a very click baity title, but I think the substance, the gist, if you don't mind, also a great podcast by our good friend,

Mike Pescatunen, the gist of this reel from this psychological expert, this marriage expert, is very interesting. It's thought provoking and I think it might be true. You want to listen? Yeah, of course. That was a good buildup. Thank you. Now if I can just figure out how to press play on it, we're all going to be good. Here we go. What is normal marital hatred? The essential rhythm of all relationships is harmony, disharmony, and repair. Closeness.

This is Tim Ferriss, by the way. One of the world's most famous podcasters. He's been doing this for a long time. I think he puts out a podcast every three months or some shit like that, doesn't he? No, he does it once a week. Oh, he does it once a week? Could I subscribe to him?

Who's the guy who does it once a year? Or once every six months? You know who I'm talking about? Kevin Rose or something. Something like that, yeah. And he gets like 78 million downloads or something. Yeah. But this is Tim Ferrris, who is a...

He's been doing this for a long time. Long time. Great interviewer and has a lot of thought-provoking conversations. And the word was a little muddled there, but what is marital hatred? And he's saying closeness, disharmony, disharmony, closeness. Disruption and a return to closeness. That's where the skills come in, how to move from disruption to repair. Our culture doesn't teach it. We don't deal with reality. The father of couples, there'd be back in the 50s, said the day you turn to the person who's next to you and you say, this is a mistake, I've been had, this is not the person

I fell in love with. That said, Framo is the first day of your real marriage so that Fred Famo What is Fred Famo I don't know I don't know either but I like also turning to your partner and saying this was a mistake No, I've been mistaken. Yeah, I've been had. Yeah been had. That's right. The first day of your life That's the first day of your real marriage That's right. That's the first day of your life? That's the first day of your real marriage. What I want to say about disharmony, it hurts.

It's dark. You can really, really feel like, what the hell did I get myself into? This is such a disappointment. And guess what? Your partner's probably feeling that about you too. I talk about normal marital hatred when you're in that dark phase. You hate your partner, that's okay. It's part of the deal for many of us. I've been going around the world talking about normal marital

hatred for, oh my God, what? 30 years. This is true. Not one person has ever come backstage and said, Terry, what do you mean by that? Okay, let's chew on it. I think what he's trying to say is this, if I'm picking up what he's putting down, if you don't mind me paraphrasing here, Chrissy. What he's trying to say is that mating, the honeymoon phase of a relationship, let's call it, and I think we've all been there, mating is when you put on- Mating? Mating. Okay.

The mating, the dance. The mating. The mating dance. The. The mating. The mating dance. Yeah, mating dance. Let's bring it down to its most base nature. Which is mating, courting, finding a mate, a suitable mate, and then doing a dance to get them. Coupling. Coupling, or decoupling, whatever you wanna say.

I think of mating as sex, but that's me. Okay, well in the non-sexuality, like us finding a mate. Let's put it that way. Finding a mate. When you're doing that, when you're trying to attract yourself to somebody or you're attracted to somebody, you want to be in your universe and you see potential in the situation, you are definitely not going to be 100%

the person you are behind closed doors. Because let's be honest about it, the person you are behind closed doors, maybe even in very long marriages, sometimes is just a little bit different. No one can be in your mind. No one can know you exactly for who you are in your perspective. Every single moment of every single day. People can come close.

I think I know Astrid pretty well. I think she knows me pretty well. Does she know every single thing about me that I ever think that I ever want that I ever desire? No, she doesn't. Because if she did, then Dua Lipa would be on this show. Um, but the reality for a lot of it... I think she knows about Dua Lipa.

I think she knows about Dua Lipa, but she still hasn't gotten Dua Lipa to come on the show. Well, that's a hard ask. It's, hey! We, we had, uh... Uh... I don't know if we're at that level. Tom Papa on the show. Why not do a Leap Up? I think we put our

best foot forward because that is what we are... That's in our DNA. That's what we do. We do a mating dance. Just like those birds that have pretty feathers or baboons. I love watching those shows. Butts get all pink and red and rosy, right? The birds are the best. The birds are the best because theirs are fucking cuckoos. They have like a whole little dance, actual dancing.

And they shake their feathers and they twist from one way and they twist from the other and they cock around. It's so great. Yes. It happens in the wild. It happens here. You put on your, you're on your best behavior. You show your best feathers. You do your best dance. You have your best baboon butt shining.

Peacock. You peacock it. You peacock. You peacock it. I'm peacocking my way through the bar. That's what we do. And like it or not, that often lasts a little longer than most of us would like to admit. We want to make sure that that person knows

that we're the best, most suitable person for them. At like a genetic level, at like a DNA code level, we are trained, we're born, we're bred to put on that show for as long as it takes to secure the deal. And because we tend to mate with one person for life, at least some people do, unless you're the Polly family, then you mate with seven people for half of your life. Oh my God, we've gotta discuss that show.

Oh, we do. I got caught up on it. We'll get there. Then at some point, it all comes crumbling down. Hey. it all comes crumbling down. It all starts to shed because life, stress, kids, money. Stomach viruses. Stomach, yeah, flu. Flu is the thing that'll take it down real quick.

Flu will take that wall down real quick. It all starts crumbling in some way, shape or form. It's hard to put on that performance for a very, very long time. And we know this about people who are famous. We know this about pastors and preachers and priests. We know this about our own partners. I think what he's trying to say is at some point you go, hmm, I remember when Brian was not such a bumbling, stumbling moron, right?

It just happens. And that doesn't, I think hatred is a clickbait word used to antagonize and to prep for a tough conversation. Sure, I see that. Okay. But I do see what he's saying is that you go through the, and if you've been in a relationship long enough, you go through these cycles of amorous and being enamored with somebody and then maybe not so enamored with them and then maybe irritated by them and maybe there's some kind of discord or disharmony.

And then if you know, if you have the skills to navigate that, then you come back together. There's that conversation. There's that tough situation that kind of breaks the stalemate, so to speak. There's a fucking, a fighting, I don't know, whatever it is in your relationship. And it can be probably multiple things in different situations. But then that closeness again is felt. We now see the person for who they are today. And then we go back through the whole rigmaroo again, I think it's a really wise thing. See what's on the dating apps and then you realize what you got.

You go to Grindr, you go to Grindr, you get pegged, you stare yourself in the mirror and you say, well, this is who I am today. I'm going to go back to Astrid and explain and get some marital discourse so we can get that closeness back together. I think this is a wise thing, and I think the longer conversation is we should be training people. We should be helping them. We should be sharing with them.

We should be prepping them in relationships that this, what you see today is not always what's going to be in front of you, and you need to be prepared for the eventual change and the change of the relationship and the nature in which the two of you interact, do the dance, talk to each other, communicate, love, fuck, fight, whatever it is, you need to be doing prep work, because, and you need to be vigilant and aware that things are changing and that's okay,

that's what happens. I love it, I think it's great. And I think that there's a larger conversation here about loneliness, about kind of inability to be in any kind of sustained relationship with our young people today, not all of them. There's lots of young folks, young folks I know, Gustavo and Allie, right?

They've been in a relationship for longer than I've. Yeah, we have somebody that's doing the same thing. Yeah. So you can do it, you can do it successfully. And there are lots of people who are doing it successfully, but there's also lots of conversation, lots of research that shows that it's not being done successfully at many, many levels.

And the birth rate is going down, not that it matters if you have a baby or don't have a baby, you don't wanna have a kid, I understand. It's kind of fucked up time to have a kid. I have 12 of them, I know. And, but there is this like undercurrent of stress amongst professionals, experts about the level of loneliness that's going on in this country. And some people think that's because there's really an inability to understand what a relationship is,

how it works, and to see it through. And so I think this is, take the word marriage out of it. Relationship hatred, like, you know, the strength of a relationship, the length of a relationship, and the way in which it goes down is tough. There's nothing easy about it. But if you really love that person and you see that it's worthy and you feel like it makes you a better person

and you make them a better person, it's worth sticking it out. It's worth understanding them. Oh, 100%. It's not always gonna be the same thing as it was the very first day. No. There's highs and there's lows and hopefully the lows make you remember the highs.

Yes. And vice versa too. I mean, you know, you just, yeah, be prepared. There's going to be highs and lows. Yes. And if you really do love and care about each other and have a deep respect and have open communication with your partner, then you can make it through. Yeah, absolutely.

Listen, you think that it's just gonna be traveling around to the beaches and fucking five times a day. You got that, that's not how a relationship works. Pretty soon, it's gonna be dragging kids to Disney World and praying that you get five minutes to take a shit by yourself. That's what's going to happen. Well, I was going to say too, you know, having, and I've seen this happen, I think probably it's well known that, yeah, I mean, adding kids into babies and kids and things into

the relationship definitely changes things. Oh, yeah. I know a lot of people think that like kids are like the problem solver. Do you know what I'm saying? That's right. Like let's have a baby and everything will be good. If you're having problems in your relationship, do not. Have a kid, they said. It'll fix our relationship, they said. Yeah, that's not going to be the fix. No. Kids are the worst. Because then the kids suffer. Because you're an idiot and then the

kids suffer. You know what I'm saying? you're an idiot, but you're an idiot. And I also know a lot of people in it, I haven't talked about this in years on this show, year, I just said years, like we've been doing this for years on this show. Oh, we've been doing the show for years. We've been doing the show for years. That's what I said, there's an S after that years.

After the year, there's an S. It's crazy. I have been married twice and my first wife, a lovely woman who I have a lot of respect for and will always, there will always be a place in my heart and in my head for her. When we, when it was time to break up, we decided to get married and a lot of people do that because the marriage will fix the issues. If we could just get married, then on the other side of that wedding, it's smooth sailing. And so I myself fell victim to that grass is greener on the other side kind of thing. It just doesn't work like that. It never works like that. If there's trouble, if the waters are choppy now,

you got to get to calmer waters before you decide to sail on. That's it. Period and a sentence. Kids do not fix anything. Marriage does not fix anything. Moving in does not fix anything. Let's take it all the way backwards. Fucking does not, well, fucking fixes a lot of stuff actually. Fuck. Do more fucking. That fixes some things. It fixes some things. Be safe. Don't have a kid. Yeah. Be safe. Wrap it. actually, fuck, do more fucking, that fixes some things. It fixes some things, it can fuck. But be safe, don't have a kid. Yeah, be safe, wrap it.

Yeah, it's a. Rip it, wrap it, let it go, oh no. I think Tim Ferriss really provoked a very interesting conversation with this guy coming on. I enjoyed it, I thought it was really smart, and I thought that if more people would understand this going in, then they would be prepared for the long run if that's what they choose to do. I'm not saying like monogamy is not for everybody. We know that. Look at that Polly family.

I know. That Polly family. Maybe they should be monogamous. Yeah, they should be monogamous. It's just so difficult to navigate. I mean, so difficult to navigate. And then, so Poly family is a brand new, fantastic, life-giving dramedy on TLC. Of course, my favorite television station

about two couples and children. So it's a poly family, but it's not poly. It's a closed poly family. I think it's what they call it. Closed quad. Yeah, that's what they call it. It sounds like a basketball court. I'm going to the closed quad.

You want to come with me? Well, cause there's four. Yeah. So, and they're closed and it's two married couples. Yeah. And they, he's got together, moved in together. and it's two married couples that, yeah, and they each got together, moved in together. One couple already had two kids. Yes.

Then they got together, moved in together, did the whole thing. I guess they didn't really, they married each other. They're all together. They're all together. Well, they're actually not all together. They're not. The husbands switch wives every day.

Yeah, I think this is one- One day on, one day off, one day on, one day off. You switch, switch, switch. The husbands switch wives every day. One day on, one day off, one day on, one day off. You switch, switch, switch. This is one long episode of Wiveswap. The women aren't together and the men aren't together. No, this is one long episode of Wiveswap. This is what that is. It's one long episode of Wiveswap.

It's just that they wanted to have sex with the other people. Yeah. I want to have, can I bone your wife? Yeah, you don't mind if I bone your wife? No, not at all. Come on, you want to move in? We'll share the mortgage, split the bills. Yeah. By the way, I hate you. Oh, I hate you too. Yeah, the men hate each other. They hate each other. Yeah. They're trying to play nice for the cameras. They're not even trying to play nice for the cameras. Speaking of adding kids into the mix, then that's what they did.

So not only did the one couple already have to, then they, then each of the wives had kids at the same time, had one baby each at the same time. So now those kids are toddlers running around. And then the one, another wife had another, just had another baby, so they got a newborn. So they got two toddlers, a newborn. The other ones are like five and eight or something. I mean, throw that in. And just to let you know,

they do not know who the father of any of the children are because that makes life easier. Well, okay, I don't wanna get into all the new show about the show, go watch it. There's three episodes. It's like- It looks miserable. It's a miserable show.

It's a miserable situation, but I'll keep watching it because I'm fascinated. I just wanna see the two guys go at it at some point, really get down to it. And one guy's a big fluffy hair, sensitive hairball. And the other guy's a big tough guy with a fucking dick swinging. And so it's two completely opposite personalities and they just have like extreme dislike for each other. But hey, he's, and by the way, one is the big sensitive hairball is clearly the better lover in the group

because both women want him there. But the other guy, the guy with the big swinging dick, you know, he's a lug nut. And I think he's probably a one pump chump. And the girls are like, well, it's my day with David. Waa, waa, waa, waa. Ha ha ha. Trying to find that. I'm going to get quicker at this.

But then it's their time with, sorry. Just going crazy on its own. But then it's their time to be with whatever his name is. It's called Michael. So Sean's the big lug nut and they're like, well, it's my time to be with whatever his name is. It's called Michael. So Sean's the big lug nut. And they're like, well, it's my time. My night with Sean. Well, well, well, well, well, well.

And then it's a, and then they go, well, it's my night with Michael. Got to get the lingerie, put on my makeup, take a shower, shave my legs, clean my hoo hoo, here we go. Michael's coming in the door because Michael's just more of a sensitive type, he probably connects romantically a little bit better I think. So it's a very interesting look at a very interesting family.

I'm not knocking it, if that's what you choose to do, I don't have any problem with it. It's just having cameras in the door, it clearly shows that this is not working out as well as they had expected it to work out. It's kind of a shit show, if I'm being honest. Okay, Polly family, go check out Tim Ferriss' episode on marital hatred if you're interested in that.

If you're interested in having like learning some, if you're interested in kind of seeding your mind about what it takes to have a serious relationship for a long time, if that's you, if you're into it, then go there. You know, the birth rates are going down like crazy. There's a lot of experts that are very concerned about that. And then there's a lot of people who aren't concerned about it. They're like, that's okay, we don't need as many humans on earth.

But you know, once it goes to a certain point, it never, you can never recover from it. So once it gets to like in Japan, they are literally paying like 5,000 yen. Nicole Sarris I saw that. Jared O'Reilly Per year or something for the first 10 years, I don't know what it is to have a child because their birth rate is about to go negative. And once it goes negative, it's like almost impossible to recover from that. And then you're going to have it goes negative, it's like almost impossible to recover from that. And then you're going to have Brian and Chrissy, a bunch of 80 year olds at the villages Tokyo, and no one's going to be, and then there's going to be

no one to do anything. They're all, everyone's just going to be retired. This is going to be a senior citizen. It's going to be one large senior citizen Island. And Hey, if Tokyo is where I got to retire, doesn't sound that bad to me. Besides the tsunamis and the earthquakes, I'm good with it. Cool. All right.

So let's make a little bit of announcement here halfway through the episode. We'll keep this going for the next couple of weeks. We have been referring to our big special event on May 31st as TC, as the 12 hours of TCB for lack of a better name, quite frankly. It was a placeholder. It was a placeholder. 12 episodes, 12 hours. We just kind of, and we did the 12 days of TCB, so I. It was a placeholder. It was a placeholder. 12 episodes, 12 hours, we just kind of,

and we did the 12 days of TCB, so I thought it was catchy. However, we have decided, we are changing the name to TCB's Endless Day. It's a big birthday bash, we're super excited. 12 at least episodes of the commercial break on May 31st, TCB's Endless Day brought to you by Five Hour Energy. It is going to be brought to you with limited commercial interruption by Five Hour Energy. They were nice enough to come in and to say,

Hey, we want to support you, so we're going to send you cases and cases and cases of Five Hour Energy to keep you and whoever else is crazy enough to join you up all day long. And in addition to that, we're going to slim down the commercials to just three per episode. One in the beginning, one in the middle, and one in the end. That's amazeballs. So thank you very much to Five Hour Energy.

They've been a sponsor for a while. They're really cool. They're super supportive. And I thought this was like a lovely, lovely. Their stuff And then they have that new spicy mango. I think it was how I say that on the commercial that really closed the deal. Cinco de Mayo's spicy Cinco de Mango. I did a good job. Thank you very much. I appreciate it. I use an authentic accent for that one. So TCB's endless day sponsored by Five Hour Energy, May 31st, starting at 10 a.m. Stay tuned.

Make sure you're following us on all the socials or go to the website. Drop us a line. You want to join us on that day? 212-4333-TCB. Text us and let us know and we'll let you know how you can call in and talk to Chrissy and I say happy birthday to us. Cause that's what it is. It's a big birthday bash. It is. And while you're at it, I know it's crazy, five fucking years.

I mean, technically- Five years, five hour energy, there's something there. There is something there. Maybe they saw it before I did. And technically, we've already been doing this for five years, like our first episode came out on April 23rd or something like that. Yeah, but we're too lazy to actually do it. We needed some time. We're just getting the party. Yeah. We were late planning the party. Yeah.

Now we're having the party. Plus I like it when it stays light out darker. So I wanted to make sure we were past that time. You know what I'm saying, Chrissy? I want to make sure we have sunlight when we're ending this thing. Because we're ending it at 10. You know, I'm saying, Chrissy? I want to make sure we have sunlight when we're ending this thing. Because we're ending it at what time? 10. You know, I did the math, like I did the math for 12 days of TCB.

And so when I did the math and I said, we're gonna do it from 10 a.m. to 10 p.m. when I actually did the math, it was 13 hours, not 12. So however many hours is 12 episodes, that's what we're going to do for you. Expect nothing more, okay? And if you get a 13th, that's just because you're being good. All right, let's do this. Let's take a break.

And when we get back, Palladian Light Girls are taking over the internet and I'm paying attention. We'll be back. Why don't you text us? And we can text back. And then you can text us in reply, then so

on? It's a fun little game I've been playing, and I think you'll be great at it. 212-433-3TCB. That's 212-433-3822. You could leave a message, too. If you do, maybe you'll end up being the voice of the show. But be warned, the pay is not great. You could go to the website and drop us an email also, tcbpodcast.com. And while you're there, you can get a free sticker. Who doesn't want a free sticker? Just go to the Contact Us button and ask for one. Follow us on Insta at The Commercial Break and watch the episodes at youtube.com slash The Commercial Break. Now I'm going to go back to that texting game. You want to play? Come on. Bye.

Why do fintechs like Float choose Visa? As a more trusted, more secure payments network, Visa provides scale expertise and innovative payment solutions. Learn more at visa.ca slash fintech. I have taken notice to... You remember we did Palladian light girl? Of course. The girl who was talking in light language. Some of you will remember that we found this girl, the internet found this girl really and it just happened to come up on my algorithm and she was claiming to be a light being from

another universe that came down with a special alien light language. And she could only, only she could talk to the alien aliens, but you could learn it if you spent $10,000 on a course with her. She did this whole video about it and in the background was a yappy little shih tzu who literally was shitting on her floor. She didn't pay attention to it. She just kept speaking the alien language.

So I don't know where she is. I haven't seen her in a long time actually, but a very pretty blonde girl living. I think she said in the Hollywood Hills or wherever must be nice. Um, and a couple of years ago when this came out, I thought, what a strange. Young lady, but you know, to each of their own, she doesn't seem to be doing any harm to anybody except for taking $10,000 for a course. But then, over the last couple of months, I started to notice that girls that look, dress, and act very much like Alien Light Language Girl have started to pop up, crop up all over my Instagram feed.

Satina and I went out there and we did a little research and we literally found dozens of these young ladies and a man actually, not just, you know, shit on the women here, the men are doing this too, who now are speaking some form of this alien light language. Now, I don't know what's going on here, Chrissy. I gotta imagine that New Age spiritualism, which started really, you know, I mean, there's always been kind of this like weird Eastern, not weird, but this Eastern philosophy

of spirituality found inside you, not outside you, and religion and spirituality has birthed a lot of strange things over the years. It's nothing new there. But this phenomenon is rather odd to me that these girls, the majority of them, are speaking in tongue and claiming to speak to alien light beings and getting messages. If you look in the comments section of some of these girls who are being followed by a lot of people and a lot of them are, a lot of people are just taking what they're saying at face value, it seems like really going down the rabbit hole with them cult, if I don't mind. Well, a lot of people are looking for things. They're, we are all, yeah, we're looking for any kind of meaning, any kind of normalcy.

And we want to have some kind of ticket to ride somewhere that's not this miserable shit show we find ourselves involved in currently. I get that. I do. A ticket to ride on a comet, actually. Remember that one. Yeah, that's right. A ticket to ride, a ticket to have alien-like babies up in space.

But if you read through the comments, which of course I do, on a number of these girls, there are linguistics experts who are saying that, one specifically I will recall on one of these reels, maybe I can remember which one it was if we look through a couple of them, who said, I am a linguistics expert. I have studied people speaking in tongue in religious ceremonies for years. And sometimes people go into like kind of a crazy trance and they start to speak a language that is clearly not forced. They're not thinking about it.

It's, it's literally mumbo jumbo coming from the inside of their mind that does not sound like or mimic an actual language. This is not that. These people are trying to make up a language, mimicking other languages, meaning they're thinking about it. They actually have, they're forcing it to happen, right? And I think you can clearly figure that out by this. Are they speaking some of the, like, are they all talking differently? A lot of them, I don't think you could tell the difference. Well, let's listen to a few of them and we'll see. So I put together a collection of reels here. I'm not going to

give away the names. I'm not here to like pick on anybody specifically. Not really. All right. Let's take a listen to what some of these people have to say and some of their alien light language. Okay? Okay. It's like Russian and Spanish put together. Meanwhile she's rubbing a rose all over her chest and face. What in the good Lord is going on here? What happened with this poor girl? Oh my God. I know seven of these people in real life, by the way.

Right. That's what I was going to say. All right. Here's another one. Take a listen. Well, what are they saying? What are they saying? They're getting messages from the universe, Kirsty. And what is the message? They never tell you that part of it. Because they're concentrating too hard on their bullshit and they're not getting the message. They're getting messages from the universe, Kirsty. And what is the message?

They never tell you that part of it. Because they're concentrating too hard on their bullshit and they're not getting the message. And what is the message? They're getting messages from the universe, Kirsty. And what is the message? They never tell you that part of it. Because they're concentrating too hard on their bullshit. And what is the message? They never tell you that part of it. Because they're concentrating too hard on their bullshit.

And what is the message? They never tell you that part of it. Because they're concentrating too hard on their bullshit. And what is the message? They never tell you that part of it. Because they're concentrating too hard on their bullshit. And what is the message? They never tell you that part of it. Because they're concentrating too hard on their bullshit. And what is the message? They never tell you that part of it. Because they're concentrating too hard on their bullshit. And what is the message? They never tell you that part of it. Because they're concentrating from the universe, Kirsty. And what is the message? They never tell you that part of it because they're concentrating too hard on their bullshit

language. Oh, implanting new subconscious programs in alignment with sacred health, wealth, and abundance in all forms. Sacred. Magical. Sacred. Sacred wealth formula. That's sacred wealth formula.

If she even knew. They all sound the same. It's all shak shak shak shak, tak tak tak tak. What does that say? Anchoring you into your soul's highest vibrational expression of divine abundance. Ah, divine abundance. Exactly what I've been looking for. Sacred divine abundance. Yes. I'm looking for sacred divine abundance. Thanks, Five Hour Energy. She's doing the chan motions too.

I know. Is that like a sign language? Oh, she's doing the hand version too? I know. Isn't that like a sign language? Yeah, it's sign language, only I know someone who actually does sign language and I'm sure they'd say, that's bullshit too. Okay, so there's another one. Let's take a listen to a third one here. Okay.

Oh. Here's an interesting one. There's a lot of talk of aliens in my book. I am a Pleiadian. Most of you probably are too, or at least some sort of hybrid of a Starseed family. I read about the Pleiadians many years ago, and instead of feeling like, whoa, this is weird, I innately knew that what I was reading... Instead of thinking, whoa, this is weird, I instantaneously went to Cuckoo, Cuckoo Loco.

I know a way that I can turn this into a business. Exactly. And this one is one of the most famous of them all. She's got a lot of followers. And she sells a lot of books and a lot of courses. She's a Palladian starseed. Palladian starseed. Or at least a hybrid is what she said. Listen, if you think about it, we areadian starseed. Palladian starseed. Or at least a hybrid is what she said.

Yeah. Listen, if you think about it, we are all starseeds. If you really think about it, we're all starseeds. You're not a fucking Palladian. What the Palladian? What? Isn't there a venue called the Palladium? There was a venue called the Palladium.

Seamless venue accessibility. That's right. That was true. This was the truest thing I had ever known. It was everything I felt in my body but never could articulate. You could never articulate that you were a Palladian? That's what you were hoping to articulate? It's not a scene. It all came out once you read the book about Palladians. Until I read the channelings of the Palladians.

The Palladians are dense. So I decided to extract their wisdom, pour it into my book. And pour it into my book, that you can now, is now available on Amazon.com. Right. Yeah, this is all a grift, by the way, in case you weren't picking up on it. Oh, here's a guy. Here's a dude. Let's see.

Is he hammering that guy? Yeah. No, he's got a, There's a guy. There's a dude, let's see. Is he hammering that? Yeah. Oh. No, he's got a, he's got one of those. I thought that was a corn cob. It is a corn cob. It's a corn cob drum. Yes.

Ha ha ha. I want to know for anybody who follows some of these folks and is into this kind of thing, what are you getting out of this? Like are you actually vibrating when you hear this? Is there some kind of messaging that's coming through to you? Do you feel like you have a better day after you listen to one of these in the morning? Are you feeling some kind of connection to these people? Because this guy literally looks like some character out of a movie. He's wearing lululemon, a little bit too tight, long hair, beard, balding. I mean, I don't know what's going on here, but this is strange to me.

It really is. I mean... Yeah, just to let you know that the dudes are in on it too. Okay, maybe one more here. Oh, no, no, no. That's not that. CMZ. Okay, so, you know, I don't know what's going on.

I don't know. But it just all seems a little too... Yeah, what I mean... Hokey-pokey. I'm trying to get my head around it. So they're channeling and saying all of these things from aliens. From aliens. Yes. The Palladians.

Some of them are Palladians. Some of them are more generic alien light language girls. Yes. The Palladians... But the Palladians is a species of aliens? Is a species of aliens, and they believe that they've been dropped down here on earth and they've co-mingled, co-mated with humans. Okay, that's how the hybrids happen. That's the hybrids happening,

and that if you're a Palladian, then you will activate when you hear certain languages. And you will activate- Your Palladian penis. Yeah. Your Palladian penis. Your Palladian penis. Your Palladian penis will come alive. And then all of a sudden you're going to have wealth and abundance. Is that what it is? Because the old wealth and abundance trick. That's how they get you. Uh-huh. That's how they get you. Who doesn't want sacred abundance? Who doesn't want sacred

abundance in all forms? Yes. Who doesn't want a $400 million jet that they can ride around like these preachers do. Because this is what the abundance preachers are doing too. They're claiming that Jesus Christ wanted you to be filthy rich at the expense of whoever, because abundance means that you are living at your highest form, and that clearly is following in the teachings of Jesus. Because these people are playing an age-old parlor trick, an age-old cult 1-Z2-Z, as my daughter would say, which is to make you believe that you too can be just as rich and healthy and wealthy and loved as they are or claim to be if you only follow the steps they have behind this paywall or behind this donation or behind this gift basket or behind this next retreat and you just go keep on going

up through the levels. If we have covered one of these, we have covered 30 of them. And it's not a particularly hard concept to understand. It's basically MLM for your soul. Oh yeah, that's what I was going to say too, the yoga documentary and stuff that we watched throughout that. You have to move up the levels and do the things and whatever. It's Scientology.

The more you pay, the more secrets you get, the closer to God. Don't say that word. I'm sorry. Yeah, you're right the closer to God, you know, the- Don't say that word. I'm sorry. Yeah, you're right. That means that this episode you'll never hear. My cameras are about to explode. But you get it. Like, this is very much a well-worn path and one that a lot of people make a lot of money

doing. And this is just yet another version of this in wrapped in new age spirituality. But I promise you that at the end of the day, most of these people, most of them, some of them I think are just like maybe they truly believe the bullshit, maybe a few of them even the bullshit makes them feel like better people, they do better things or whatever,

but a majority of them are jumping on a bandwagon, they see an opportunity to make money and as long as they keep selling the books and the retreats and the lotions and the potions and the alamogotians, then at the end of the day, they are getting enriched at the expense of your, you know, your want, your desire, your need to be connected in some way, shape, or form. I had a saying, and I think everybody who's heard it has loved it. Do you know what the most expensive thing in a strip club is, Chrissy? Hope. Hope.

I hope she gives me her phone number. I hope that's her real name. I hope we end up together. Now, not to diminish hope. No. And out of itself. No. In and of itself. No. Hope is awesome.

You've gotta have hope. Things are gonna be better and things are gonna get better and be better for you. That should push you to strive to do things, but not pay somebody else. Hope is one of the most beautiful things in the world and powerful things in the world. And I believe in it with all of my being,

but I don't want to hope on false prophecies. That's just what I don't want. It's all in here. It's not out there. Exactly, you don't just need to pay for it. Now, if I gotta pay somebody $10,000 for it, first of all, I can't afford it. Second of all, I'm not going to.

First of all, I can't afford it. Maybe I'm the one who's an asshole just because I can't afford to go to the alien light language retreat in, you know, New Findland, Peru, where we're going to stay at a five-star Ritz Carlton and you're going to get a, I don't know, a sage bath with my special, you know, monkey vag oil or whatever it is. We're going to summon your sacred uterus to your most highest abundant form. Vee! Your Palladian penis.

Your Palladian, we'll be inviting Palladian penises to come up to the uterine uteruses and make sweet, sweet love. Money will fall from your vagina. I saw it happen one time on Palladia at the palladium All right We're all fuck Meanwhile we can't get five people to follow us on Instagram and some of these girls have 20 million followers It's crazy. A lot of people believe this a lot of people believe it and that's what the saddest part about this Is that they you can't clearly see well, it doesn't hurt to to be a beautiful young girl

In a very skimpy outfit rubbing a rose all over your face and body Yeah, I mean when you're in a bikini, when you're in a string bikini, rubbing roses on your willy hoo hoo, and going shaka da ka shaka da, shaka da ka shaka da. Waa waa waa, waa waa. Howdy, howdy. I'm 30. Yeah.

Maybe that guy was talking to the Polarians. Maybe that guy was talking to the Polarians. Alien light language, there you go, you never know. Maybe that guy was talking to the Palanians. Alien language. There you go. You never know. TCB's endless summer brought to you by Five Hour Energy, May 31st, starting at 10 AM, 12 continuous episodes of the commercial break, dropping one every hour until we drop one every hour on the floor here in the studio.

Just like the kids at the preschool today. I fell for him. That was a somatic response distress. I saw it and I feel that because sometimes that happens to me. Stop, drop, and roll. Anyway, TCB's Endless Day brought to you by Five Hour Energy. Also with the help of Covert Creative, Odyssey, our network, our wonderful network,

and CTV New York, our good friend Bella doing all the booking for the show. So thanks everybody, we really appreciate everybody chipping in, five years of the commercial break, six seasons, we're gonna be talking about it all because we're gonna have time to talk about it all. We're gonna have time to do six more seasons of the commercial break.

at all. We're going to have time to do six more seasons of The Commercial Break. 212-4333-TCB 212-433-3822. Questions, comments, concerns, or content ideas. Let us know if you want to be on the show at The Commercial Break on Instagram, TCB Podcast on TikTok, youtube.com slash the commercial break and TCBpodcastcast.com for all the information, all the comings and goings and your free swag. Still didn't tell that story, but I'll get to it. All right, Chrissy, that's all I can do for now. I think so. I love you. God, I love you. Best to you. And best to you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I will say, we do say, and we must say, goodbye! The Hot Honey McCrispy is so back at McDonald's. With juicy 100% Canadian-raised seasoned chicken, shredded lettuce, crispy jalapenos,

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