The Commercial Break - Kidnap The Stonish Giant!

Episode Date: September 12, 2025

EP807: After a long day of confusion and fear, Bryan & Krissy get back to what they know best...ADHD comedy and Mountain Monsters! Take a break with the TCB team as we review the kidnapped MM's and the killer of the Stonish Giant. TCB Clips: Ice Cream Man! Watch EP #829 on YouTube! Text us or leave us a voicemail: [phone]TCB FOLLOW US: Instagram:  ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@thecommercialbreak⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Youtube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠youtube.com/thecommercialbreak⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@tcbpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.tcbpodcast.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ CREDITS: Hosts: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Bryan Green⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ &⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Krissy Hoadley⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Executive Producer: Bryan Green Producer: Astrid B. Green Voice Over: Rachel McGrath TCBits & TCB Tunes, Logo, Name and Audio Assets: Owned, Written, Voiced and Produced by Bryan Green. Rights Reserved To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Grab a coffee and discover Vegas-level excitement with Ben-M-GM casino. Now introducing our hottest exclusive, Friends, the One with Multi-Drop. Your favorite television show is being reimagined into your new favorite casino game, featuring iconic images from the show. Spin our new exclusive, because we are not on a break. Play Friends, the One with Multidrop, exclusively at BenMGM Casino. Want even more options? Pull up a seat and check out a wide variety of table games from Black Jail.

Check to poker or head over to the arcade for nostalgic casino thrills. Download the BetMGM Ontario app today. You don't want to miss out. 19 plus to wager. Ontario only. Please play responsibly. If you have questions or concerns about your gambling or someone close to you, please contact Connects Ontario at 1866-531-2,600, to speak to an advisor.

Free of charge. BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with Eye Gaming Ontario. Girls what's just happened? So there's an ice cream van there selling just two ice creams with two twingums in it for bloody nine pound for two of them. Nine quid for two?

Yeah, nine quid. That is going to get nowhere one that comes to my street is out of one pound a p or two pound that he's going to get nowhere with that. Noy in, is it? Noy no, he ain't. That's well bad in it.

Yeah, you should know. And he only does bloody card stood there with my cash. Bloody old. That's wild bad, isn't it? Bloody wild bad. Yeah? Yeah, I bet you can hear me.

On this episode of the commercial break. And marked him for death. They just flashed to the previous time, I guess they saw the woman in the woods. And one of them. He's just like an Indian with more paint on his face. He's got like a Benetton shirt on. And like a headpiece. He's got a headband with a long feather.

He's screaming into the void. This looks like my weekend. The cacao ceremony. It really does, yeah. The cacao mushroom ceremony. I think a few people are doing the same thing The next episode of the commercial break Starts now

Oh yeah, cats and kittens Welcome back to the commercial break I'm Brian Green This is my dear friend and the co-host of this show Chris and Joy Hoadley Best to you Chris Hey Brian Best to you out there in the podcast universe How the hell are you? Thanks for joining us

2.30 in the morning is right I'm watching a video about a guy who Like the Doraville Police, Doraville is a place here in the Metro Atlanta area. Right. They were called to a Waffle House because a guy was sleeping at the table for about three and a half hours and they couldn't seem to get them up. And so they had to call the police. Waffle House. Waffle House. We limit you to three hour now. You can't go over three.

Yeah, Waffle House. Three hours is the limit. So after three and a half hours, they called the police. The Dorville, I saw the body camera footage. Dorville police show up. The guy is non-rousable. He's just not getting up. He was out. He was out like a light, but they like, you know, they finally like, like, pull his eyelids back just to make sure that he's up. And he kind of like wakes up and he's like, what, what?

And they're like, hey, man, you've been here for like four hours. Like, they want you to leave. Yeah. And he's like, man, fuck that shit, man. I pay my bill. I'm here. Fuck that shit. I'm taking an app.

And the guy does not look like an unhomed person. He looks like, you know, he's got the geezies on and the whole nine yards. And so the officer's like, man, you got a place you can stay? He's like, fuck yeah, I got a house, man. I live right around the corner. He's like, well, you got to go home. And he's like, fuck that. I took a nap.

You know, I paid my bill. I can take a nap. I can take a nap. If I want to. God, that reminds me. That would be a fantastic cam to watch. They need Waffle House cam. Yes, that's a good idea.

Where is the Waffle House live stream? We need that in our lives. Yes. They have a Bonaroo live stream. They have a Burning Man live stream. They have a live stream on every beach in the entire world. Why don't they have... National parks, whatever.

I mean, we get a Waffle House. We have an Eagle Ness Cam. Why don't we have a Waffle? I guarantee it's more interesting than Eagle Ness Cam. So the guy, anyway, the guy causes trouble. And after the officers for about three and a half minutes taking his shit, they're like, okay, dude, leave or go to jail, right? Yeah.

And he's like, man, fuck that. And so they take him down, right? They pull him out. They take him down. They put him in handcuffs. And they find over a half a pound of cocaine in his pant pocket. A half a pound of cocaine. I mean, that's for one, for two.

Why was he sleeping? Yes. What the fuck? Why isn't he up and about? I mean, now unarassable. Yeah, dude, you can't go on a bender and decide to take a nap with your fucking, with your fit in your fucking pants. Yeah, that's crazy.

That's the number one bonehead mistake, always made by drug use. users and dealers is keeping the shit on you out in public when you're fucking up. It's like my uncle said, my pretend uncle. I don't remember where I heard this from. Don't fuck up while you're fucking up. That's the one thing you can't do. If you're going to do your shit, if you're going to blow lines. I can't believe he was that adamant about not leaving.

All he had to do was leave. Yeah. See, some people are just dumb. Some criminals are just dumb, dumb, dumb. They're just dumb, dumb, dumb. So anyway, moral of the story is don't leave your cocaine in your pocket if you're taking a nap at Waffle House, it's likely you're going to go to jail, and not for the sleeping part, for the not sleeping part of the cocaine. Yeah, yeah. And if you do, leave it and take a nap,

just leave them when they ask you to leave. Yes, just leave. Just say, I'll take the ticket, which is usually like a trespassing ticket. I'll take the ticket. And I'm out of here. Walk home and wake yourself back up with all that cocaine you have in your pocket. Number one, number two, second part of this story is, this is like a Facebook video that I saw. Then after watching this entire video, which was like 26 minutes long, then I get an ad. Again, I don't know what in the world is going on with Facebook, but they have uncoupled from any kind of ad safety whatsoever. They're releasing the tattas? Yeah, not the tattas. I got an ad for something called Wanna Bump. And Wanna Bump is a product, a powder product made with pure caffeine

and something called nozital. Nose at all. That sounds like it's just made up. Nose at all. You're kidding me. No, I'm not. I mean, it's good product placement, I guess, right? Listen, they knew I was interested in the cocaine video.

They said, I'm probably interested in cocaine. Here's the closest thing we got to it. But it literally is powder. Like in one of those little, you know. Like in a capsule? Like a cocaine vial. Okay. Have you ever gotten cocaine in a cocaine vial?

I mean, have you ever seen cocaine in a cocaine vial? I've seen it in movies. Okay, you've seen it in movies. I used to have like a really hoity-toity dealer, like, you know, back in my 20s. Not D. Okay. No, D, D was a baggy kind of guy. Okay.

You know what I'm saying? D was a baggy kind of guy. But I used to have like a hoity-to-de dealer. I worked in the, what's called the rich part of town near Buckhead, Vining's. And we used to have a hoity-to-de dealer. And that hoity-to-to-de dealer would give you. a gram in the little vial. Yeah, the little brown vials with the black tops on it.

You know what I'm saying? And he said it was to keep it from getting moist and all this other shit. And I always just found it to be a waste of resources. And it's extra stuff you have to get rid of in a weird way around the house. I mean, at times I'd have like 10 vials just sitting around the house. You just save them? I did. I saved them for what I don't know.

You can't bring him anywhere. I mean, if you think a baggie is bad, wait until the cop pulls out a vial from your fucking pocket and you know it just and then it doesn't anybody ask questions this is way before amazon doesn't anybody ask questions when you go to the head shop or the vial store the vial store yeah the glass vial store i mean honestly it's just so silly this guy thought he was all that in a bag of cheese but then he also charged like a hundred and ten dollars per gram i was gonna say he probably upcharged you with the vile cost listen he thought he had the best cocaine in anywhere like that was his thing but it wasn't ever he had more nose at all than actual cocaine in there i'm sure

of it baby laxative or whatever they come it with you know vitamin b12 i think is a popular one baby laxative is another one because you think you're doing good cocaine until you actually get good cocaine like i can imagine let's just pretend for a second let's go down the let's go to let's go to mr rogers neighborhood and be in the imaginary kingdom and assume that one was to take a trip to I'm picturing puppets, well. Mrs. Miss the queen of a man. This is the queen.

Yes. I am I declare this to be brown cocaine vile day. The little trolley. Yeah, it'll take you to the land. Daniel Tiger's neighborhood, which Daniel Tiger, if you remember from Mr. Rogers' neighborhood, Daniel Tiger was the cute little tiger puppet. Yes. And Mrs. Ferngolly or whatever her name was, the lady who always talked to Daniel Tiger.

Daniel Tiger is now an extraordinarily popular cartoon with the kids. They've got a whole series. And I love that that tradition is carried on. I tried to get my kids to sit down and watch, like, actual episodes of Mr. Rogers. But it's just so grainy and weird. And it's from a different universe to them. They're like, who is that guy? Right.

Why is he changing his sweater? Here's a little fun. Here's a little fun fact before we get back to it. Yes, you change his shoes. A little fun fact before we get back to imagination land about cocaine. Okay. Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood intro song, the theme song to Mr. Rogers' neighborhood, was never played the same way twice. It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood. There's like 1,400 episodes of Mr. Rogers' neighborhood. And never was it the same twice. Never. And the reason why is because it was always sung by Mr. Rogers Live. You could tell that just by watching it. But it was also, the piano was also played live in the studio by a certain gentleman. And that gentleman was there for all the episodes. And he always played it just a little bit differently. I like that. Just twinkling on the keys just a little bit differently.

I like that. I like that little fact warms the cockles of my heart. It does. It makes it unique. And my heart does need some warming. Yes. So let's go back to Imagination Land. Okay.

And pretend that we were to take a, take a trip down to a central American country. I'm not going to name the country, but let's pretend that it was Costa Rica. Okay. And then let's pretend that you were in Costa Rica visiting, and one was to get some cocaine somehow, right? It's much closer to the source down there than it is up here. And so therefore, it doesn't pass this through as many hands. So if you were to do cocaine here in America that someone said was good, and then you were to go down to a place just imagining, like Costa Rica. Closer to the source.

closer to the source, then you will understand what really good cocaine is all about. And the difference is monumental. It's monumental. Remember the scene in Blow where Paul Rubens, Pee Wee Harmon, does the cocaine and he can't feel his face. He's testing the purity of it. He's like, you know, bad cocaine burns at 100 degrees. And, you know, medium-sized cocaine, medium-okay cocaine burns at 120 degrees, but pure cocaine burns at 180 degrees. or whatever. And it gets up to like 172 degrees. I have felt that feeling in my face before or no

feeling in my face before. It's very interesting to notice the difference. I can't feel my face. I can't feel my face. My teeth or my toes. Because I just put good cocaine of my nose. Well, yeah, all the, you know, I love those rock docs and I love to read biographies of all the rockers from the 60s and 70s. And they all talk about how back then it was completely different. Yeah, because they would, like, they had American pilots who were making deals with the cartels down there, the newly formed cartels that were figuring out that they were sitting on this gold. And they were getting American pilots, like the cocaine cowboys, to put, you know, 180 pounds of pure cocaine. Yeah. And then just fly it straight to Florida, wherever they were flying it to, Texas or Florida, the panhandle.

and then it would just get on the streets. And at that time, it wasn't a game. Like, it didn't have it. You got to think of it like an industry. It's an industry now, and people step on it all along the way so that they can make extra money and sell it to fucking morons like Brian out of margarita cups of chilies. Do you know what I'm saying? Sometimes in the fancy vial.

Sometimes in the fancy vial, but I think I was paying more for the vial than anything. Yeah. But it's just a different game. I mean, I think Fleetwood Mac and in itself helped bring cocaine to the U.S. It's true. I mean, go back to blow and think about that story. They ended up with 100 pounds of cocaine, and they didn't know who to sell it to because not that many people even knew what cocaine was.

I mean, they might have heard of it, but they didn't buy it. They didn't know what it was. And so they were creating the demand as they got the cocaine. And that's an amazing story of some ingenuity. Now, you know, okay, we can all debate the morals of it, but it's really quite ingenious how they put all that together. Oh, it's fascinating. created an industry basically out of thin air. And listen, the product is good. It makes people feel good. And that's why they like it, right? I assume. Let's talk about, while we're on cocaine, let's talk about Charlie Sheen's new documentary.

Oh, yes, I have, I watched the first part. Okay. I haven't watched it, but I did read an article, 13 things we learned from Charlie Sheen's new doc. It's really good so far. Okay. I cannot wait to get. I'm so over my head busy right now that I don't have a moment to breathe. So many things going in a million different directions. But I will get to it this weekend, I hope. Here's what I learned that I was really shocked by.

Shocked. And I think it's, I don't know. It reminded me of D, the drug dealer that's in the program. I don't know if he's, I don't know if you've seen if he's popped up yet. I think he's in the second part. I don't he hasn't popped up yet in the first one of the things that's revealed in the documentary is that the drug dealer himself the guy who was selling charlie the cocaine buying coke cooking it up for him and making it into crack so that charlie could smoke it and charlie was

smoking like we're talking like baseball sized rocks of cocaine right that's i mean i don't know because i was not a crack smoker but i can only imagine that that just must have been like professional level crack addiction. Oh, yeah. Yeah, he discusses how he got, how he started doing the crack. Okay. Yeah.

His dealer became so concerned at Charlie's abuse and use and his own health and his decline during all of this drama that was going on with two and a half men and, you know, Charlie out there high on Coke, you know, doing all these interviews and all this other stuff. And that the dealer himself said, I think I kind of like this guy. Like, I think he's kind of my friend. Yeah. I don't want to say, go down. Yeah.

So what I'm going to do is I'm going to start cooking the Coke. I'm going to start cooking the crack with less and less Coke to make sure that Charlie doesn't kill himself. Okay. And so he did that over the course of a year and a half until the Coke was so fucking shitty. Like the crack was so shitty that Charlie was just getting a headache from it. He was just getting sick. He was getting a headache. He wasn't getting high.

And that led Charlie to put. believe that he was so like tolerant of cocaine that he could no longer get high and he needed help. He was getting sick essentially. He was getting sick because he was just like smoking baking soda essentially. Right. So that really surprised me

and I love that. I love that little story. There's like a little there's a little humanity in that story that makes me happy. I don't know why. It's a story about Charlie Sheen and his crack dealer, but I don't know if it made me feel kind of happy. Plus that was a good money source, I'm sure.

Yeah, I thought, too. I thought, well, he's making more and more money. Yeah, every time did Charlie ask for it back. I don't know. Listen, hey, Charlie is an enigma. It's a fascinating story so far. He's lived a life. One of the things that I hope that they address in this is Corey Hayman and Corey Feldman.

Because if you don't know, about 10 years ago, about a decade ago, Corey, Hame died from a drug overdose himself. Corey Hame was a mess. And he was a mess. And him and Feldman kind of had this pact that they were going to out and take down sexual abusers inside of the entertainment industry. I remember that. And only when Corey Hame passed did Corey Feldman feel, I guess, he felt compelled to share what Corey Hame had shared with him, which was one of the things was that. On the set of Lucas, where Charlie Sheen and Corey Haim are opposite each other, star in the movie, opposite each other, that, how do I say this without, you know, getting censored?

Corey Haim was graped by Charlie Sheen. Graped. I think, just figure that one on. Okay, grape. Okay. Take the G off. Graped. Okay.

By Charlie Sheen. Really? On set of the movie. Really? And Corey Feldman. And you can find this out there. Corey Feldman then graphically explains what Corey Haim graphically explained to him, the place at the time, who was there, who wasn't there, all this other stuff.

And so I don't know if it was going to be addressed, but I hope it's addressed because it's a pretty serious allegation. Yeah, that is. And, you know, I don't know, but that wouldn't look, that doesn't make me think fondly of Charlie Sheen, at least not at that period of time. No. For sure, without a doubt. Speaking of Corey Feldman, one last thing we'll talk about before. You do love you some Corey Feldman.

I do love me some Corey Feldman. He's like the world's biggest goofball. So he's still out there playing to the crowd? Oh, he's so fucking popular. But not for the reasons he wants to be. But I don't know if it matters anymore. No. Like, if we had 10,000 people that wanted to show up to Fox Theater, just to laugh at us because we were silly and stupid and terrible, I think at some point it would hurt.

And then at some point it would just be like, okay. Just go with it. Whatever. Fuck. People are paying to go to the Fox Theater and laugh at us. Let them pay to laugh at us. And we'll all be in on the joke together. And we'll play it up.

We'll ham it up for whatever it is they want. But Corey Feldman is out there not only creating music that's terrible and laughable, in my opinion. And then people go to watch the terribly laughable music that he puts out there. But Corey Feldman is now going to be on Dancing with the Stars. No way. He was announced as one of the people that's going to be on Dancing with the Stars. Okay. So Corey is seeing a little bit of a resurgence in popularity here.

And, you know, can't fault the guy for winning, can you? I mean, at the end of the day. No, not at all. I might tune in for that. I think I have to. Yeah, you do. You have to. Yeah.

I love watching Corey. I just, anytime of Corey Feldman. About him. There is something about him. And it's very nostalgic for us, too. Well, I was never like a lot of kids my age, I think, were like the two Corrie's were the coolest. Yeah, I was. I was one of those.

It was not my thing. Lost Boys was cool. Lost Boys was good. But I was a Kiefer Sutherland guy. Oh, yeah. I was in it for Kiefer Sutherland, right? I thought he was the baddest ass on the planet. Yeah, all the fangs and the red eyes.

Oh, yeah, I used to have the magazines and stuff. like bop and whatever. Oh, you did? Oh, yeah. Oh, she had a bop. I would get those and they would have all the, you know, the splashy pages with, you know, the latest actors of the time. Mm. Mm.

Chrissy, do tell. You could pull it out and put it on your wall. I could see little Chrissy just on her bed like this. Yeah, check it in. No iPhone, no iPads. Right, you didn't have it. No direct TV. Checking in with your favorite stars.

Your favorite teen stars. Imagining what her and Corey would. do on a day at the mall. We go to Spencers and get our ears pierced. It's weird because I don't remember having too much of, you know, like, oh, my God, I'm so in love with them. But it was very interesting to me. Like, what are they up to? What do they do?

They're cool. Yeah, but listen, they were living a dream that I was not living. I think I appreciated them for that, is that they were, you know, they were older than me at the time. Yeah, me too. But maybe I could be there someday. Maybe I could be living in that world. Yeah, I could be a Brad Packer. Right.

And the Brad Packers were way older than me. But, you know, Roblo and Molly Ringwald and all those kids. So anyway, all right, well, listen, to address the elephant in the room, yesterday we put out an episode where Gary Vee and I had an opportunity to commiserate over the events of the day. You can go listen to it. I'm not going to rehash all of that. We're going to take a – I think we're just going to leave it alone at this point. But to address another thing. Chrissy wasn't here because of a scheduling conflict, and that – so that's why you do not hear Chrissy in that episode.

There's been a few people who texted in. Sorry, I couldn't make it. It's okay. I think we had a good conversation with – You did. You did a good job. Thank you. I appreciate it.

And a lot of people texted in and shared that they felt better after the episode, or it was good that I put it out. Thank you very much. And then a few people were concerned that you weren't there. Let me repeat again. It was a scheduling conflict. Scheduling conflict. Sheschel. It had nothing – like, we didn't fire Chrissy.

It's actually a funny story behind it, but we'll leave it. Yeah, we'll leave it. We'll leave it at down. I don't want to embarrass anybody. It wasn't our fault this time, actually. Wasn't our fault. We just rolled with the punches. Yes, you did. Okay, let's take a break from everything today. Let me do a mountain monsters. Let's do a mountain monsters. Yes, we need some mountain monsters in our life right now. Let's have a giggle. I'll take a break. I'll load one up, and when we get back, a mountain monsters. Hey, it's Rachel, your new voice of God here on TCB. And just like you, I'm wondering just how much longer this podcast can continue.

Let's all rejoice that another episode has made it to your ears, and I'll rejoice that my check is in the mail. Speak in a mail, get your free TCB sticker in the mail by going to TCB Podcast.com and visiting the contact us page. You can also find the entire commercial break library, audio and video, just in case you want to look at Chrissy at TCB Podcast.com. Want your voice to be on an episode of the show? Leave us a message at 212-433-3-3-T-CB.

That's 212-433-3822. Tell us how much you love us, and we'll be sure to let the world know on a future episode. Or you can make fun of us. That'd be fine, too. We might not air that, but maybe. Oh, and if you're shy, that's okay. Just send a text.

We'll respond. Now, I'm going to go check the mailbox for payment while you check out our sponsors, and then we'll return to this episode of the commercial break. Okay, we're back, trying to put a little light in your life. And Chrissy and I have some mountain monsters we'd like to share with you. I was thinking about it.

And I was like, we need some mountain monsters, don't we? I agree with you. I agree with you. We need to lighten the mood a little bit. It's a dark time. So let's go into the dark with a mountain monsters. With our infrared lights. Yeah, with our in for our night goggles.

Let's get the night vision out. Oh, by the way, this is Huck and Chuck and fuck get kidnapped or something. This should be a good one. Wood County. Where are they, Wood County? Wood County, Virginia. Oh, my God, look it. He's got a mask on. Oh, my God. Oh, are these the kidnappers?

Yes. Oh, scary. Why are they filming them? Oh. That road team pushed all three of our guys in the back of that fan. Me and Wild Bill's got a whole ass across this field. Me and Wild Bill get a whole ass off this field. They let me out temporarily to do this video and then I have to get back to kidnapped.

I'm screaming loudly in the hopes that someone comes to save us. And try to catch up with them. Let's go, let's go, let's go. We got all these guns, but let's not use them. If you don't use the guns in the case of kidnapping, when are you going to use the guns? Yeah, they're right there. Shoot them. They're chasing a van on foot.

And this guy says, damn, don't you feel a lot? Oh, and by the way, two 83-year-old men who've been down at the Wacken tree. It was chasing after a brand-new Ford Focus van. It's not going to do it. That's what I was saying. Why are they on foot? Well, because, you know, where's their four-by, whatever they call it? Yeah, they always have that thing.

Come on. What? The Monster Mobile. What? Where are we going? We'll go for a little ride. Oh, they kidnapped them with their mics on. That's right.

We put microphones on the kidnappers. You have somebody who wants to talk to you guys. We have somebody that wants to talk to you guys. His name is Mr. Big. Let's go, come on. Let's go. Him brother boy in the beat over and getting bucks. What?

What? I didn't understand anything he said. I didn't understand anything he said. It's so good. Truck and following. Expert tracker. We're the only backup team's got. We've got to catch up with him, Bill.

Now they're in a vehicle. Why does he always sound like he's got more air in his mouth and he's. Blubbblop. Blupper. I see him now. Stay back. I don't get too close. Turn on.

Don't get too close. Why not? Turn on 107.6. Stay back. They got a marathon. Brace. Stay back. You have your headlights on you, too shit.

You're the only ones in the middle of this field. But stay back. Only stopping, bold. Now you can have your camera back. Now you can have your camera back so you can take evidence to the police. I've got news for you. The man I'm taking you to see is the sheriff of these hairwoods. Sheriff not in hand

You don't know where the hell you're right You can film all you can work now big boy Say cheese Who's filming The van stops A guy gets out and comes back And gives us her camera I'm filming

But they've got hoods on Yeah And Buck's got a lot of shit on his shirt God he looks like he has a bra on He does Huck needs to get that to the dry cleaners immediately That is the dirtiest shirt I've ever seen on a person.

Yeah, it's bad. We must be so far out. They just got roughed up. Yeah, by the way, they have like corn sack hoods on them. Like the scarecrow. Yes. Matter if we start recording. Because no one's going to recognize what we're at anyway.

Because no one's going to take this for evidence when we give it to the FBI. I don't know, but I don't remember seeing in the news that these guys got kidnapped. No, it was. It didn't make the news. And by the way, why are you? are you talking outside of the van if you're kidnapped inside of the van? This is really gone off the rail. It's a bit incongruent, but let me not point out the obvious. Let's roll with the imaginary.

Let's roll with the imaginary here, Chrissy. All right. Yeah, I'm doing fine. Yeah, I'm doing fine. You got a bud light. You got a minimum. You guys have no idea what you've gotten yourself into. You have no idea what you've gotten yourself into. Well, did they get himself? mythological tiger camels for a living they absolutely have an idea of what they're getting themselves into he's making a left right here we go guys where they stop them for us

yeah let's just stay way far behind so as not to rescue them on accident they come home they go home we're home You guys ease right out on to there. Huck has never eased right out of anywhere. Poor boy. He is huge. All right. Back up, camera.

Back up. Back up camera. Yeah, back up camera. Why are you just letting the cameraman walk around? What kind of kidnapping is this? Only the kind that could happen in Wood County, Virginia. Wood County, Virginia. Right now, I'm getting led into this old creepy building.

We have no idea what these guys want or what the hell they're capable of. I love that he's narrating his own kidnapping. Seriously. They are. There's nothing. There's no. These are the worst kidnappers in the history of kidnapping. You get right on and we've got to get to them guys.

Get the corn. Oh, I think we've seen the end of this one. This is looking familiar to me now. I think we do see the end of this one, like a. A mythological creature saves them from certain destruction. Oh, really? Hey, him on. We're going to our camera guy.

You can keep your mouth up. You're trying about what we do. Chaining them. Yeah, they're chaining them to the floor. Interesting. But it kind of drops the suspense level a little bit when you know that they're already been released. So when they do these cutaway videos, when they're talking to the camera, solo, you know, I already know that they've been released. And that kind of drops the scare factor.

Yeah. I'm not really all that worried for them because they look fine in the cutaway videos. My cabin should be right up here. Me and brother, Willie, we're recon around this cabin. We're going to get up there and put an eyeball on. See what the hell is going on with our team. I want to run in circles around the cabin. That guy, that way that guy talks is so funny.

I'm going to run around the circles around the cabin with my pants down. And then Willie is going to go in there and stick his. Pink Pony right in the hole. We're going to see if we can't jizz them out of there. It's a good old-fashioned jizzing. Sit down. I said sit down. Go there.

Go easy, guys. Go easy, guys. I mean, you already don't kidnap us. You got to push us around, too? Yeah, come on, big boy. We walk into this cabin. It's pitch dark. Yeah, come on, big boy.

give it to me. They slam us down into these chairs. I can only imagine. That guy pee his pants? Did I see pee in his pants? Maybe. Let's see. Yep, there's the tail of the tape.

Oh, a little pee-pee-pooh. Or is that the shadow from the camera? Well, I'd like to imagine it's pee-pee. Pee-pee his pants. I can only imagine what's going to happen next. I'm getting really excited about what's happening next. Everybody all right. Yeah.

I guess we can turn the thermals off now. Yeah, there's a huge bright light just turned on. Like a floodlight. Yeah, but we're still in black and white thermal mode. Oh, there we're still in black and white thermal mode. You can see a mirror on the wall and you can see a speaker and a camera. Wow, someone really thought this out very well. They thought the kidnapping of the mountain monsters out to A.T.

They built a cabin in the woods with a two-way mirror and a camera and a light. I've never seen a place. like this but it looks like an interrogation room why are we here you'll find out soon enough meanwhile uh you know freaking fracker outside they don't know what to do except to talk to the camera you guys got to go in use your guns well i tell you what well you felt if you sit back you're doing shows sit back and enjoy the show yeah sit back and enjoy the show yeah sit back and enjoy the the show i now present to you ghost hunter season two on travel channel why is this place this whole situation is weird we can get up and walk out of here at any time then why don't you

but if we want answers we got to see what's next us there's somebody in there Hello? Hello? You don't happen to have any deli meat back there, do you? A mountain dew? A mountain dew, a submarine's sandwich. I'm very scared. I get scared.

I get the bubble guts. I need something to settle my tummy down. And my friend here doesn't piss themselves. He needs a fresh pair of pants. Yeah, if you got an extra pair of drawers, I appreciate it. I know we could get up and get up. walk out at any time but we're just curious by nature we thought we'd stay here and for certain death and figure out what's going on to see the show you don't mind if my cameraman walks around

and takes some photographs do you hello why are we here all right bucks getting up yeah He's going for it. Going. It has an eyeball to eyeball with the mirror. Yeah, eyeball to eyeball with himself, right? Straight to the two-way mirror where he can't see through. Hello? Grandma, is that you?

I told you, boy, not to be running around in the woods. Oh. Oh, shit. Sit down. Sit down. You're like out of a haunted house. I've ordered dominoes. And we're all going to watch the seven little Johnstons together.

It gets lonely out here. What top foolery is going on here? All right, let's take a break. Oh, my gosh, that's great. We'll get back to the kidnapping here very shortly. We'll be back. Let me do something, Brian. has never done. Be brief. Follow us on Instagram at the commercial break. Text or call us,

212-4333-3-TCB. That's 212-4333822. Visit our website, TCB Podcast.com for all the audio, video, and your free sticker. Then watch all the videos at YouTube.com slash the commercial break. And finally, share the show. It's the best gift you could give a few aging podcasters. See, Brian? That really wasn't that difficult, now was it? You're welcome. This episode is brought to you by Defender. With its 626 horsepower twin-turbo V8 engine, the Defender Octa is taking on the Dakar Rally. The ultimate off-road challenge.

Learn more at landrover.ca. The new BMO ViPorter MasterCard is your ticket to more. More perks, more points, more flights, more flights, more flights, more flights. More of all the things you want in a travel rewards card And then some Get your ticket to more with the new bemo V-I-Porter MasterCard And get up to $2,400 in value

In your first 13 months Terms and conditions apply Visit BMO.com slash V-I-Porter To learn more Okay, and we're back with Huck and Chuck and Fuckin'in' The Boys And they are currently kidnapped If that's what you call. Kind of. Kind of kidnapped. Their hands are tied behind

their backs unless they're not tied behind their backs or tied in the front of their backs, and they're chained to the floor unless they're not chained to the floor. Yeah, then the other guy, his hands are out in front, but bucks are in back. I don't know what's happening. Yeah, and he, oh, did he pee himself? Oh, is that just a color of the jeans? I think it's a color of the jeans. Okay.

That blows my imaginary joke out of the water. I'm sitting. Damn, I'm sitting. As soon as that skeleton appeared in my face and said, sit. I knew you could buy it at Home Depot for 2499 every Halloween season. It does look like it's straight out of like the cheap mask. Those Halloween stores that pop up. Yes.

Spirit-O Halloween. I sat down. There's not a whole lot of things that scare me, but that did. That's why I'm not allowed to Costco between September 4th at November 3rd. Oh, yeah. You're a guy that killed the stonest giant Yeah Yeah

No And then the guy They're the guy That's the stonist giant That was pretty specific That was really specific He knew exactly And then the guy goes

No Try again You're the guy who killed John T. McGillicuddy born 1933, Chicago, Illinois. No. Would you like to try again? I like this game. We're going to play until you get it right. Oh, my God.

What do you want with us? I want to make a deal. A deal? Yes. I have some tops baseball cards from 1984 that I can't sell on the open market because they've been slightly dented. You'll buy them and I will let your family live. I need a receipt and a bit of sale. I'll tell you you what right now, old boy.

There's no way in hell we're going to help you kill another damn bigfoot. How do you know I'm old? I never said I was after a big foot What are you after? I want you to go back to Lee County, Virginia Back to the dark forest And I want to pick up all the trash that you left there To capture the woman of the woods

Oh, the woman of the woods We've heard about the woman of the woods Yeah, was that the one where, what's his name, fell into the ice cold water, and he couldn't get out, he was shaking, and there was like an image of a small girl running around the woods. Yep, that's it. The woman of the woods, is someone we don't want to mess with. This team's already had one heck of an encounter with her. When we were in Lee County, she touched Huckleberry and Jeff. She tried to whack them both.

off. But they weren't into it. Got scared. And mark them for death. They just flashed to the previous time, I guess they saw the woman in the woods. And one of them. He's just like an Indian with more paint on his face. He's got like a Benetton shirt on.

I'm like a headpiece. He's got a headband with a long feather. He's screaming into the void. This looks like my weekend. It really does, yeah. The cacao mushroom ceremony. I think a few people were doing the same thing. Judd ended up facing off with her.

His hunt collapsed down. on him and walked off with him. And now we haven't seen him since. When we found him, he's bleeding, he's bleeding. He was covered in blood. Yep, that's as realistic looking blood as I've seen in a long time. Through this team for a loop,

and she affected Jeff's mind. Maybe for life. All right? Maybe for life. We help you get this woman of the wood. They really are. They're really overjoy. By the way, why is there a stereo in the background?

Are they going to play some music later? How's this benefit us? Let me make a deal with you since my hands are tied behind my back. What do we get out of it? I have something you want. What's that? Deep dish pizza from Chicago. If you capture, don't have the woods.

In exchange, I'll burn yourself. who killed the stonish giant. Oh, they want to get their hands on the stonish giant killer. For what reason? I don't know. I don't watch the show. What are you asking me about? You didn't kill him?

No. But you know who did? And I know where the body's at. He says he can deliver who killed the stonish giant and let us know where the body is. And we really want to... Something in my gut is telling me to believe him. Yeah, something... I don't know, but the skeleton mask behind the two-wave mirrors seems trustworthy.

So I'm deciding, in order for them to release me from my kidnapping, I will agree to such a deal. The other guy is just sitting, Jeff, I think is his day, he's just sitting there with his hands in front of him and is just sitting in the chair. Yeah, because he's like, holy shit, I got to go to the woman of the woods again. Last time I ended up with my pasty white legs all full of blood. Deal, that's something we're really going to have to consider. the dark forest and you'll find what you're looking for right down to there all right swarm yeah now the other two guys have decided they're going to move in how do we know you'll keep good on your deal i've never you can have my car keys i've never lied to you i've never lied to you he said

i've never lied to you and i never will well yeah yeah you come of dead because you told us she's going to contact us we sat around by the phone for months give him help i sat there waiting for you to call for months we sat around the phone for months you told me you're going to pick me up take me out somewhere nice it's all lies i wash dishes i clean the house i take care of the chitlins and all you do is lie lie lie i'm done with you Stoneish Giant Killer. But you speak of certainty. There are secrets you have yet to learn.

Oh, Jedi Master. Yes, what the fuck? You have secrets left to learn. Secrets you have not learned yet, I do. You must kill Stoneish Giant, and then I will tell you I will. I don't know what that means. So far, it seems like one big riddle after the next. I don't know what that means, but it does not coordinate with the storyboarding we did for season three.

Right now, we're flying by his rules, and I'm about tired of it. Everything you need is in front of you. A stereo, a light, a two-way mirror. A candlestick. A candlestick. A candlestick. A matchstick. A matchstick. A widow maker. Where'd you go? Hey I can't do this voice

Forever it hurts my throat I gotta get some tea I don't know who in hell this guy is but he claims that everything we need to catch this woman of the woods is right in the front of us See that moving in that left window again Yeah the mirror

It's you guys That's what you need you dumb shit It's not that hard of a riddle to figure out Yeah I see somebody Moving around the bunch Jeff I had you zip tied front for a reason. I know you don't have no shoulder problems. I know you don't have no shoulder

problems. Oh, he was zip tied. I didn't see that. I thought he was just sitting there. But I'm figuring to give you one. If you could do me a favor and wrap your short arms around my body, we could stay together for warmth. Oh, we can just walk right out of here? Can you just hug me anyway? They patted up down. They missed a knife in the right top part of his boot. We're getting Nancy. It's about time to get out of here. We're getting Nancy. I got to do a number two. And Jeff Stunpizzed himself again. Get me out of these thugs.

Just get the hell out of here. Get that one off. The camera. Yeah, the little red camera, like the nest camera, recording everything they do. The answer's right in front of our face. I'm tired of these guys. The answer's right in front of our face. I want to see yours.

Oh. Oh, he's throwing the chance. chair through the window. Don't get violent. Oh shit. Now's the time to run. Now the guy's outside decided to move. They've been in there for an hour and a half. Talking to the stone is giant killer. Hell, pull it. Come on, get away.

Oh, hey. What fuck is this? What is the hell? Holy shit. It's a hog's head. A hog's head. Hell. buck throws that chair through that mirror all of a sudden right there behind it

there's a damn hogs head on a stake blood coming out of its nose its ears, its eyes what the hell does that make? Well, that's the signature leave behind. Yeah, that's what the stonish

giant killer leaves. That's his calling card. A pig's head. Yeah. It's also the symbol for a lot of barbecue places in town so, you know, could be one of the barbecue place owners.

I don't know, I'm just saying. What is a hell? No, shoot you. Shoot me. You. Yeah, those guys shut up. Yeah. Look, they're pointing the guns at the guys they know.

It's so stupid. What a lot of that? Look in here. Check it out. What the hell is? What the hell is? What the hell? A hogan!

A hogan? I love pigs' ears. Let's get them. Let's pickle those bad boys and have some dinner. It really does. Poor thing It's got bat ears Someone in the prop department went wrong on this one

That's not how a pig's ears look What's that all about? I don't know We gotta figure out how we're gonna get Zach unchained I get him chained up like an elephant Are you freaking serious? Like an elephant He's laying right here

Or this time this man, look at it How'd you not see that dude? You're such a dumb ass. I hate you. I've hated you, said you join the crew. Who was changed? The cameraman? The cameraman was changed. That's how it all went down. Let's get out here and look. We're going to see if we can see anybody. Yeah, let's do that. I mean, meanwhile, he's asking the cameraman how he missed the key. Yeah. The cameraman always misses. The cameraman has a miss. The cameraman is known to miss. That's what he does. He didn't get the woman of the

woods. He didn't get the big foot. He didn't get the, you know, lion mains tiger. Yeah, the wolfish. He didn't get the stonish giant. He didn't get any of it. What? Anybody in here? Holy shit. I'm telling you guys, there was someone in here. He was standing right there talking to us. We never seen nobody leave. Guys, there's, they're gone. There's nothing else we can do. Guys, there's nothing else we can do. Let's not call the authoritaz. Let's not get the FBI involved, local sheriff, the community helper, or anything like that. No, no, no, no. Because there's nothing we can do.

Yeah, it's in the past. Absolutely nothing. Wow. Oh, geez. What an exciting episode of Non-monsters. Drenelan. That's only nine minutes of the 48-minute episode. What bullshit did they fill the rest with?

I mean, honestly. Oh, wow. We were. Oh, all right. They never disappoint. They do never disappoint. It gave me a laugh for the first time of 24 hours. So that I appreciate.

Good for you, Mountain Monsters. Good for you. All right, well, listen, it's good to have you back. Yes, good to be back. You know, if you care to you, you can go listen to yesterday's episode. That's me and Gary Vee having a little chat about the day's events. And, yeah. Listen, we've got to rev down a little bit.

We've been saying it for a long time, but now this might be a moment where we all can find some clarity and revved down just a little bit. It's too hot in the kitchen. It's way too hot in the kitchen. Violence only begets violence. And we know this for a fact. So let's everybody take a deep breath and agree to disagree on some things. But maybe like Gary and I did, we just have some calm, rational conversation and work it through. Now, I don't have a lot of faith that that's going to happen

everywhere around the world, but it'll happen right here on the commercial break. Yeah, we get to start. We have to be the change. We too. Be the change you want to see in others. As Rom Doss once said. Oh, Rom. Anyway, I do want to thank Gary for coming on. He selflessly said, I don't want to promote

anything on this episode. So go check out Gary V's social media. He's got a marketing company if you need help. He's an interesting guy. Very interesting. He started, like, one of the first wine clubs, you know, he's done it all. He's been very successful.

He's into NFTs and cryptocurrency in a way that I think is meaningful. Check him out. Do a little research on Gary V. If you don't know who he is. But I have a suspicion you know who he is. He's pretty famous. And, yeah. And then we'll be back next week.

Have a great weekend. We'll be back next week with Salvatana. Check out that, Chrissy. What do you think about this? I'm excited. I'm excited. about them apples. 212, 4333-3-3-T-CB, YouTube.com slash the commercial break.

And at the commercial break on Instagram, you can also go to the website, TCB Podcast.com. Okay, I guess that's all I can do for now. I think so. I'll tell you that I love you. I love you. Best to you. Best to you out there in the podcast universe.

Until next time, Chrissy and I will say, we do say, and we must say. Goodbye. Hit pause on whatever you're listening to and hit play on your next adventure. This fall, get double point. on every qualified stay. Life's the trip. Make the most of it at Best Western. Visit bestwestern.com for complete terms and conditions.

You know, I'm going to be able to be able to be. Ha, ha.