The Commercial Break - Official Troll Watcher

Episode Date: October 20, 2020

The Bit: Henry Fonda from Podcast Universe wishes Jeff Hoadley a happy birthday. The Show: Hoadley discusses how hard this podcast is taxing her time. Bryan is blamed for more drama in Hoadley's life, Bryan goes to vote and runs into a "official poll watcher" from Kinkos, Bryan relays his most embarrassing teenage romance moment and the gang hope for a quick end to 2020. Don't forget to rate and subscribe so you never miss an episode! Text us or leave us a voicemail at +1-661-BEST2YO ([phone]) LINKS: Get a FREE TCB limited edition collectible sticker Follow us on Instagram Follow us on Facebook Subscribe and watch the show on Youtube Join us live on Fireside New episodes every Tuesday & Friday everywhere you listen to podcasts! For advertising contact AdvertiseCast  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hello everyone, it's Henry Fonda from Podcast Universe, your favorite podcast application, where we're always here to stroke your ego. I wanted to take a few minutes before this commercial break to say a very happy 70-second birthday to my very dear friend Mrs. Jeff Haudley. Of course, husband of Chrissy Haudley. Now if you would, everyone sing along. Okay, here we go. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. I hope you like 90 days beyond saying. It's my gift to you. Fuck you. Very good, everyone. Now with a little bit more heart.

Happy birthday. Do you? Happy birthday. Do you? If you ever think about the three songs, just give me a call. I do. Very good. Very nice, everyone.

Well, with heart, I love it. Thank you. Now, this commercial break. Coming up on this episode of The Commercial Break. This is weird push and pull that went on between us, and I was in this relationship at the time, it was rather tumultuous, so I was trying to, like, you know, get it out and work it out. I was just gonna talk through it,

and I felt like he wanted to date her. He was like, well, you're not gonna take her, I'll take her. I do this for an hour and a half once a week. You don't have time to fit it in. What are you talking about? Well, you know, I just got back from traveling. Yeah, but what do you got to do? It's the pandemic.

I know. Well, I'll tell you what I've got to do. I want to hear this. It's my friend, Green. It is totally your fault. What did I do? It's the show 90 days. Oh, no.

No. It has sucked me in and like an addict. I thought that I could quit after that season that you had me watch with Coltie. Coltie. Coltie. There is a polite way to honk when something is going on, right? Little love tap. You know, little. Yeah. Hey, but the light is super right and then there's that great Right which means fucking ass moving and then there's like

Meanwhile, you know, I'm like, you know handcuffed to the wall in my room With nothing but a transistor radio, you know do Morris code to my friends With nothing but a transistor radio, you know, do more as code to my friends. BEE-BEE-BEE-BEE-BEE-BEE-BEE-BEE-BEE-BEE-BEE! The next episode of The Commercial Break starts now. DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-DIVA-D I feel like, is that a Cardi B thing? It is. I like it. I like it. Is that a Dwarp or a Charp?

What do they call it? Dwarp, I can do it. Charp, yeah, you can. Can you smack that ass? Cardi B. I don't know, something sexy about Cardi B. For me, yeah. I don't know what it is.

Because I'm not usually into that stripper type, right? Yeah. The typical stripper type, and she just, I don't know, but there's something about Cardi B. There's something lovable about her. Something lovable, something huggable. Yes. Yeah.

I wonder what's going on there on my mind. Wonder where I'm making that connection. It's my therapist that would say, where are you making that connection. My therapist would say, where are you making that connection? Probably in my penis. But I'll check, and I'll give back. I'll give back to you. I'll check on my private time.

Therapist. It's a she, my therapist is a she. Yeah. Yeah, because I refuse to have a man as a therapist. I mean, you know, something about it, like two dudes. I feel like I have some friends that we've got some good soft energy together, like some brother energy where I can let out

and have a real nice talk or cry or whatever. Not ashamed, Chrissy, 2020, and touch with myself. That's right, you're new. I've been touching myself. You're a modern man. I am a modern man. Look at me, I'm hip, I'm to the nines, I'm into things, I'm into stuff, I'm into emotions. That's stuff and things.

I'm in stuff and things. I'm in touch with my anger side and my anger side and my soft and my benevolent side. But I feel like having a male therapist, which I've had only once in my life. And I felt like there was just like a little push and pull between him and I that didn't feel comfortable. He felt angry to me. Like he was angry at what I was telling him. I would be telling him about whatever, you know, don't girl I was dating and he'd be like, it doesn't sound like you're treating her correctly. And I'd be like, what are you taking her side? She's not even here. You didn't like what he was throwing? No, I felt like he wanted to date her.

Do you know what I'm saying? I don't know, it's just this weird, it's this weird push and pull that went on between us. And I was in this relationship at the time, it was weathered tumultuous. So I was trying to get it out and work it out and just talk through it. And I felt like he wanted to date her.

He was like, well, if you're not gonna take her, I'll take her. You're not gonna take her, I'll take her. Right? You're not gonna take her right, I will. That's right, he kept telling me that, you know, I'm in the wrong, but if you got her phone number, do you wanna bring her in for a session? Right. Sure.

Yeah, it sounds good, Mr. Therapist. So then I found that the female therapist, I don't know, they're more grounded for some reason, Chrissy, that's just how I feel about it. Mm-hmm. Yeah, no, you've got to find the right fit. You do. You've been to therapy?

You got that? Yeah. It's good, it's good for the soul. Yeah, it really is, but again, you have to find the right fit. You do have to refine the right fit. It's like a good pair of underwear. You do. Or gloves.

And you've got to try a couple pairs on. That's right. It's like a good pair of underwear. Or gloves. or mistress. You gotta find the right fit. Right. So welcome to the commercial break for those of you who aren't aware. I'm Brian.

This is Chrissy. This is episode we don't give a shit because it's the panda. I stop counting because it's just like, I mean, we're well. What are we at? Number 120 or something like that. I think we're at number 28. 28. Which does seem like purgatory.

It feels like purgatory. We've been. Because we do want a week, right? So 28 weeks. Whoa. I feel like we do six a week. I feel like. Doesn't it?

I know I was getting ready for it tonight. And I was like, gosh, I don't know if I have time to like fit it in. And then I'm like, I'd do this for an hour and a half once a week. You don't have time to fit it in. What are you talking about? Well, you know, I just got back from traveling and yeah, but what do you got to do? I can't.

No, but I'll tell you what I've got to do. I want to hear this. It's my friend. Green. It is totally your fault. What did I do? It's the show 90 day. Brian, it is totally your fault. What did I do? It's the show 90 days. Oh, go.

It has sucked me in like an addict. I thought that I could quit after that season that you had me watch with Coltie. Coltie. Coltie. And Coltie like my boobies. Like an act. I mean like an addict. I was like, I'm just going to look at the other season that's on there and see what's

going on. Well, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. I didn't realize I was going to put future roadblocks in front of the commercial break by you know, turning you on to a fucking television show on lifetime or whatever channel TLC, so the learning channel. I mean, I can't look away from it. It's hard.

Yeah, I'm to blame. This, you're not the first person just told me to see there. My little brother Patrick is also him and his girlfriend. They hate me. Yeah, they watch it. And there's 12, there's like, you know, 300,000 different seasons of this show now. The man at best, they like an hour and a half long. Not too out. Well, you know, you're watching them commercial free. But yeah, when there's

commercials, it's two hours long. And I don't know. I was hooked from the moment. I think because it hits home a little bit because Astrid is from a different country. And we got married, not like this. We didn't have this 90 day fiance thing. It didn't happen like that. Quite differently actually. But there's something about that. In the first season that was authentic and I felt like I connected with it. Now it's just like trashy reality.

It's so crazy because you just see what has happened. And you know, there's been a gross misleading of people to other people until they're together. Until they're together. That's right. Yeah. Then they can't get apart. They're almost close and diamonds and things. And then the girl gets here and it's, oh, the guy's got a dice hanging from his beat up.

Chevrolet Cavalier from 1988. It's so true. I mean, the things that these thing is that it happens on both sides of the coin, right? It does. It does. There is a there is a season where a gentleman has been dating a girl, a Russian girl. I don't know if you've seen this one. He's he's probably in. I don't know. He looks like he's in his late 90s, but he's the guy's probably in his late 50s.

And he's wearing like a, not a trench coat, but what do they call those things a runner or like the big things, like the coat? Like a track suit? No, not a track suit, but like a trench coat, but it goes down to the ground. It's like, you know, you're in an old Western movie or something?

He wears a, yeah, a duster. A duster. He wears a patent leather duster everywhere he goes. It's clear that he's been watching one too many episodes of Star Trek. He's got like three cats at home, no friends, his life, you know, but he's made some money somewhere and he is following the he has been dating this Russian woman for seven fucking years through a website where every time that he presents on a text message he has to pay per word, per word.

And she refuses to give him the information or telephone information because she feels more comfortable doing it through the website, right? It's comfortable making money. Clearly, like it's clearly a scam. And he says he thinks he spent, I think the word, the number was like $700,000. Communicating with this girl, he's been to Russia nine times. She has never once shown up, never once has she shown up when she said she was going to.

And so now when the show picks up with him, he's on his 10th journey over there to go see her and he's still communicating through this damn app where it's clear she's just sucking him drunk But he makes a ball kind of excuses as to why this is his girl and you know, and then you see the pictures Oh, yeah, then you see the pictures over and you're like, oh my god Please, I mean what would this woman ever be doing with this man except taking his money? That's it, right? I mean there are some small

realities in this lifetime that we're living, in these bodies that we're living. And that in one of them is that you are going to be a consolation prize when you're 57 years old with a poorly done hair club for men treatment and a duster that you've been wearing since you were 12. I mean, it's like, it's just fucked up. Yeah. I won't tell you how it ends because I don't know if you're on that season. No. But here's up. Yeah, I won't tell you how it ends because I don't know if you're on that season But here's but yeah, I won't tell you how it ends But don't play me the your responsibility that the podcast comes first before the television show 90 day fiance

I thought you were gonna say I was trying to fit in recording the podcast and Jeff and I are having marital problems I need to go on a date night. Oh Or you know, I don't know. Got my yearly gynecology appointment, but no, she says, I don't know if I can fit it in. I got another episode of 90 day fiance to watch it's calling me. Well, I won't keep you too long then. Well, thanks everybody. Thanks for the show. We'll talk to everybody next week. Thanks. Chris, he's got to go watch 90 day fiance. Wow. Wow. Your priorities have shifted. And here I thought we were right or dies. And

we were just, we were just agreeing on our love for Cardi Beatty. And then you dropped a bomb on me that I'm being left for an episode of 90 day fiance. I dated women like you. I've addicted. You forced me to watch it. I didn't force you to watch it. I told you you need to watch it so we can talk about it. And now I've watched it and watched it and watched it. This is the singularly most entertainment, entertaining human being that's ever been on that show.

Big Ed. I don't know if you have you seen big Ed? No, I haven't seen big. It's not big. But he definitely is Ed. I don't know if you have you seen big Ed? No, I haven't seen big. It's not big. But he definitely is Ed. He I don't even want to get into all of it, but I wish I could get that guy on the show because he's just a ball of he's just a he's just shits and giggles. I don't even know how to explain him. You'll get there. But anyway, so welcome to the commercial break now. The 17 minutes in. I'll come to the commercial break. the 17 minutes in. Welcome to the commercial break. DCBpodcast.com is where you go, you can read all the show notes, find out more about Chrissy and I, listen to

any of the episodes, we also have all of our YouTube episodes are now up on the website. Then there's links to the YouTube channel and all that stuff. Make sure you go and join the break room. What is the break room? Well, the break room is basically this. Chrissy and I do an after show, after every show, we record an additional bit of content

on YouTube on the YouTube platform, but it's only available for those who join the break room. The break room is free. There's absolutely no charge because we do not have those kind of balls. We're not going to charge it. We're not there yet. We're not there yet. Will we ever be there? Is the question in Chrissy's mind when she's getting ready for the show? She's like, well, it's not like I'm paying me. I might go get another episode of 90 day fiancee on real quick. No, I enjoy doing this.

Brian, I really do. You do. You get to laugh and talk. It's just I feel like I feel like it's just us having a conversation. Like we would if we were just hanging out of the bar or something like that. It totally is. We've had these conversations about so many different things. I know.

But not 90 days. I didn't realize 90 day fiance was going to derail our friendship like this. I wouldn't. I'm going to stage a 90 day intervention on you. I'm going to take that to the list. They need to have that as a show. It's Jeff into it. There's Jeff watching.

No, no, he's disgusted whenever he sees me watching. He really doesn't like it that bad. He's not that guy, huh? I just can't see past. Well, I was just guessing that you were watching it before I started watching. That's right. I feel like Jeff just needs to watch an episode

and he'll feel a little bit better about it. I don't know. He doesn't have two children or a job, right? I think he doesn't have a lot of it. What's going on? I feel like, I feel like anybody with a good, anybody who goes into it with the mentality, it is what it is, just entertaining reality trash,

will have fun with it. But if you're expecting some documentaries here he's on the immigration ins and outs of the United States, forget about it. The reality, what I can't believe, I'll be real honest with you, because I can't believe is during this administration they haven't shut down this 90 day visa

that goes on after the television show clearly. I was thinking the same thing. Yeah, I was thinking the same thing. The television show makes it clear what a clusterfuck this 90 day program can be. I mean, listen, so of these people do work out, but I think they, it's hard to tell if they work out because there's a television show involved

because a lot of these people go on to seasons two and three and four and eight and 12. I mean, there's someone maybe who's been on there since the very beginning and she's got actually got her own television show. Yeah. It's just, it's man, I think this is one of the most popular television shows

that's out there, period and descent. It's 90 day fiance, which probably says a lot about our state of our country. Oh, sure. So maybe I don't feel so bad. Maybe there's lots of people going, I don't know for a time to go to work today. I've got to watch another,

I got to catch up on 90-day fiance. So go join the break room and then you can get the after show and you can hear more of this, more of this in streaming conversation. That's right. That's the streaming conversation. In streaming conversation. It's a familiar one. In streaming conversation, that's right. At the commercial break on Instagram

and Facebook, and if you join the Instagram and the Facebook, we are giving away some swag like this, if you're on YouTube right now, you can see this beautiful Yeti bug that I have. It's got the TCB logo, and then we got some masks and some pop sockets, and a bunch of different other stuff. So go join us on the socials. So I went and voted.

I got it done with, I got it over with. I'm going tomorrow. Yeah, are you gonna go down to the Phillips arena? I think so. Yeah, that's where I'm going. I think so. We got a place that's right down the street from us that's closer, but Jeff was saying these

seeing all kinds of good stuff on social about how great the poll workers are and how they make it fun and whatever, so we're going to go check that place out. Not only has Philip Sabrena made a name for itself in the voting arena here in Georgia, so early voting started in Georgia this Monday, which was Columbus Day, and it was national news that in Georgia some people were waiting 8 to 10 hours here in Georgia to Monday, which was Columbus Day. And it was national news that in Georgia, some people were waiting eight to 10 hours here in Georgia to vote, and they were waiting eight to 10 hours

to vote like they waited. I have a friend who's one of those in a cot. We did too, yeah. A city here north of Atlanta, she waited eight and a half hours. She got there at six in the morning and she didn't vote until four in the afternoon, three in the afternoon, something like that. So she waited eight and a half hours to vote and she said that everyone in line around her was happy to do it

And they were sharing snacks and they were you know batteries were dying and people were you know Watching 90 day fiance on their phone watching 90 day fiance I was watching British comedies on Netflix as I waited I waited three hours I went on Tuesday I waited three hours at the local library, which is a small voting location. And there was probably a couple hundred people that were waiting in line. It's hard to tell since everyone was kind of distance, you know?

Yeah. Well, most people were distance. And then there were some people who just didn't care about the distance. And I was proud. I'd say most people were wearing masks. Most people, it was a requirement that you wear a mask once you got in the building, but outside. Most people were wearing masks, but of course there was a few who weren't

and I noticed the people around, those people were taking a few extra steps from their backwards. That's right. There were plenty of distance between those people. But I've never felt more proud to press the stylus pen, because you don't pull the vote machine anymore, but the stylus pen for my candidate of choice, because I think this is clearly, like they say this every year that it's a defining election, right? This is the most important election of our lifetime, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But I would argue that this is clearly probably one of them, or if not the one, right? So I was proud of this.

And I was glad to see that there was not a lot of shenanigans going on at my polling place. There was a poll watcher, a Republican poll watcher, because that's what it's said on his baking notes. It's a GOP official poll watcher. And he was actually sitting in the room, which I found, I didn't know you could sit in the room. But I guess you can, if you just like,

I guess you can, there's some process you go through and he's watching the polls. But he was sitting there and keeping an eye on things and we'll go, okay, whatever, you know. What exactly are they watching for? I guess people that are trying to vote twice, like, I mean, I tried to, I went in, you know, I went in the exit and then I came right back around,

but they told me, I don't know what the fuck you're watching for. Yeah, what are you watching for? People peeking in, like peeking over to the next guy, excuse me, who are you voting for? Yeah. Do you know the, I've never had a problem the many years that I've been voting now.

Do you know the answer to number three? I'm not really sure what that means. What am I cheating? I mean, I'm voting. I know what I'm voting now. Do you know the answer to number three? That's what I'm doing. What am I cheating? I mean, I'm voting. I know what I'm doing. So I'm not really sure what they're watching for. Irregularities, I don't know. I just don't get it.

The poll workers seem perfectly capable, very professional, everyone's bummed up. Yeah, they've always got the workers there. And people that were walking through the line making sure you had what you need. Do you have your license? If you don't have this, do you have that? We can get you this if you don't have that.

I got there and I don't know, maybe it was like noon. I got there noon in about 15 minutes in, there was probably six or seven people that were already behind me, right? And we weren't going anywhere real quick because once you get in, there's only two people that are checking you in and only seven voting boxes. And it takes about 15 minutes from you finish to start

when you get in the room to the end because there's a couple things you got to think through. We also have some questions about this and that's the other things locally. I get into line, I'm 15 minutes in and imagine that it's like a it's a library with a rectangular shaped parking lot like a regular parking lot, it's a library with a rectangular shaped parking lot, like a regular parking lot, you know, a couple hundred spaces in the parking lot. Main street, side street, you turn out of the side street, then you turn into the parking lot.

Well, there are plenty of people now who have parked on this side street because the parking lot is full. And, but people are pulling into the parking lot nonetheless, like it's Christmas fucking day. And, you know, it's like Black Friday and you're creepily following the person that's coming You know waiting for the person to come out and you're gonna follow them to their parking space I hate that shit by the way. I fucking hate that shit. It's creepy. I don't do it. No one ever I mean you shouldn't I don't know

It's just to me. I hate it walk. Yeah, just walk just walk or you know you'll get lucky at some point Or if you see someone pulling out that's a different story but following them through the parking lot. Hey man, you live in? No, I'm not. I'm just going to the car to, I'm going to change my shorts, I'll be right back. That's a fuck dude, am I leaving? I don't wanna tell you that information. So anyway, so people are doing this, they're coming through the parking lot and they're

seeing if they've got a space and then they're going to the parking on the side street. So at one point, 15 minutes in. I notice that there's a little backup going on in the, where people are turning in. There's one lady up front who is waiting for another couple who have just the walks to their car

and they're getting in their car. And then there's a lady behind her. In her Ford litter box or whatever the fuck she's driving, some piece of shit, you know, trashy car that's full of newspapers and dead kittens. I don't even know what's in there, right? But she's behind her. Well, this lady, I mean, we're not,

I can tell what's going on here. And no one's been waiting it more than 30 seconds for this to go down. But all of a sudden you hear, meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh. Oh, Lord. Right. Yeah, yeah, fuck, yeah, yeah, what?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Standing next we're all kind of looking at each other like I don't someone someone's having a bad day, right? Yeah Another 30 seconds goes by And I'm like, oh my god the lady's got a window down her mask is around her neck right now She's not the Chen guard the Chen guard right she's not out of the car yet. So okay, I'll give her a break But she is just like she's pissed that this lady is held up her vehicle for any reason whatsoever. Now the people who were getting in their car have stopped getting in their car because, you know, everyone in line is now like, do we duck and cover now? Or should we wait for somebody to pull out a gun? Or what's going on? Like, I mean, it's 2020. You don't know the fuck's gonna happen. No, no. So these people are like standing outside the car, like watching this lady honk and I'm like just getting the car

Just getting the car just go quick like you know We don't want this shit to go down to people get in the car and they're literally trying to pull out and Now it's the 30 second flat horn listen there's a polite way to honk when something's going on right? Little love tap You know, little. You know, hey, buddy, light just turn. And then there's the super. And then there's that A, A, A, A, A,

which means, get your fucking ass moving. And then there's like, A, A, for 30 straight seconds, which means that, that's the worst. If you could, you would bite somebody's head off, right? You would punch them through the front windshield of their car if you could. And that's the worst.

It clearly signals that you're an unhiddishfucking moron that you can't hold your shit together for a minute and a half while someone pulls out of a parking space But this lady and she is just screaming I'm like, oh my god Geez People pull out lady lady pulls in, and now this lady screeches around the corner and then comes close to us, right? Like, I mean, literally, it's like 36 miles per hour around,

it's a parking lot. Sit down, right? And as she's driving by, she's like, can you believe this bullshit? And I'm like, oh my God. People are angry. So now we're all concerned in line. Where everyone's like,

that's the lady. That's lady, or something's gonna happen. That's the lady who has a mall itself cocktail. Somewhere in her car. Yes. Well, she drives away. There's no spots available that she drives away. So now we're figured, maybe she was just coming by to see what time she should vote.

She's a poll watcher. And she's a poll watcher. But wait, wait, maybe so. Three minutes later, walking, cresting the hill of the parking lot, right? Cresting the hill of the parking lot, with pine straw, old cat litter, cat fur in her hair. You know, they're like,

of showers of foreign concept as lady, shaped like a Lego box, probably in her mid 60s, right? Just the type of lady that you know, if you had her for a neighbor, the police would be called on you multiple times a year, right? It's just for no reason whatsoever. Just the unyielding.

Well, TLC is doing a show on her about hoarding. Yeah, that's right. The car was full of shit. I'm telling you, you could tell when she drove by. It was just full of shit. But okay, whatever. The way you live your life, live your life, what up? Yes. And she walks up, right? And now she's still got the was just full of shit. But okay, whatever, it would be the way you live your life, live your life, what up? Yes.

And she walks up, right? And now she's still got the fucking mask around her chin, chin guard. She's, she's, I hate the chin guard. She is protecting her chin hair from her own arms. I hate the chin guard. She walks up, right?

And this is the type of person she is. She has to instantaneously get everybody to agree with her that this was the foolishness that was going on in the parking lot. She is dressed in a black sweater with a black shirt t-shirt under it with black pants with black sketcher shoes like she was going to work in McDonald's. It was unbelievable and she had a big sign like a big like made at kinkos badge and it said official pull watcher is what it said. But it was white with black lettering. Like it, no, there was no, there was no seal,

there was no information is like who you get a whole, no name, no nothing. It just said official pull watcher. As if she had made it herself. You know, with her, you know, was something she bought on QVC, like, you know, you now can own your own badge maker for $29.99 plus $29.99, he's shipping and handling. Be an official poll watcher. Have a disability pet. Don't worry about it. Make anything up. She walks into line.

She walks in the line. Can you believe this bullshit? These people! They're here! I'm there! I'm not getting it, they're here! And everyone's just kind of like their head down, you know? Right, look the old, look away. It is what happens in this country.

It is what's happening. No one respects anybody anymore. And I'm like, no one respects anybody anymore. Bitch, you just spent 15 fucking minutes of your life worrying about someone waiting one and a half minutes to park. It's just unbelievable. That's it, that's it, that's unbelievable.

I don't even know. And I'm like, oh my God. She's also got the earpiece in, like the earpiece that the truckers use. You know what I'm talking about? The big headset with the earpiece, with it's Bluetooth connectivity, you know, from 1997.

Yeah. She's also got that on. She's standing touch. So I think as soon as she, I swear to God, she'll like, hey, in her hair and shit, go to your sofa. I think now that the lady realizes that no one's going to communicate with her, no one's engaging in her bullshit. Yeah. Right.

Now all of a sudden, she's on a phone call. Yeah. I'm here. I don't know I'm waiting 15 minutes or no parking spaces. No one's here to greet you. It's like even on anything There's nothing I know a bunch of people here. Oh, well, I'm asking fucking she book and I'm like, oh my god She's not on a phone call. She's just letting everybody know how she feasts young and imagine you ever made an imaginary phone call to let others around You know how you feel

Guilty you know everyone's a while. I just make an imaginary phone call Because I don't want to communicate with you directly, but I want you to hear what I'm saying you know really loudly from the other room These usually when I'm dating somebody oh No, I can't go out tonight. Thanks for calling. Yeah, I'm dating this chick right now, but listen when we break up, you know So I'm so I'm like oh my god. This lady is so fucking ob chick right now. But listen, when we break up, you know, so I'm like, oh my God, this lady is so fucking obnoxious. Already, it's obnoxiousness. I noticed about halfway through her fake phone call as she's like walking in circles, right?

Oh, and she had a stack of papers, by the way, just like a stack of random papers, like a file folders was shit falling out of it. Like coupons from last week or something. I noticed about halfway where she's walking in circles. She has the black shirt and the sweater are tucked into her underwear. And her underwear is white men's hains underwear.

Oh, look at me. That is a sweet look. I... 12 back on sale now in Walmart for $12.99. I am like, oh my God, this lady is like, she's right out of a movie. Yeah, it's out of a movie. So now there's a poll worker that's going around, right?

The poll worker is going around. She's asking if, here in Georgia, you can ask for an absentee ballot. If you didn't get that absentee ballot and or you don't want to use it, you want to go to the poll instead, you have ask for an absentee ballot. If you didn't get that absentee ballot, or you don't want to use it, you want to go to the poll instead, you have to sign an affidavit that basically says, I asked for one, but I'm not going to turn it in.

I'll destroy it, don't count that one, I'm good. So the lady has been around, just kind of walking up and down the line, just asking and explaining. So some of the people that had come behind me, this was a situation for them. I had asked for an absentee ballot. I didn't get it, or I don't think I got it. And so I'm here, and I just like to, But some of the people that had come behind me, this was a situation for them. I had asked for an absentee ballot.

I didn't get it, or I don't think I got it. And so I'm here, and I just like to, you know, okay, you got to sign in affidavit. And the lady goes, excuse me, excuse me. What is this about affidavits? And she's like, oh, well, if you got an absentee ballot, then no, no, that's not the law. The law is if you got an absentee ballot,

you must have an absentee ballot. This is why, this is why there's so much fraud. There's so much election fraud. This is not right. And I, I know my rights. And I'm like, oh my God, you know your rights? Lady, you know your rights and everybody else's rights. You know election law.

It's your own official election worker. Right. So the, the lady behind me was like, the law book. Yeah, the lady behind me turned around and was like, okay, excuse me, ma'am, I'm talking to the poll worker. I don't need your information. And she's like, I'm telling you right now,

this is election fraud, this is what's happening. There's elections around the country, this is happening. You voted, you now you can go and vote with your absentee belt. Now the people behind me are getting into an argument with the lady with the haines underwear, you know, men haines underwear size 306 are like tucked into her underwear are now getting into an argument. The official poll worker who actually has a fucking badge and

the official poll worker who has no fucking badge right are now getting into an argument with a lady who clearly just needs some help about this whole thing and this gets like, it gets heated but in a way where the lady's getting heated but the other lady is like, I'm just gonna do my thing, ma'am, and you can believe whatever you wanna believe. And when, you know, you do what you do, and I'm gonna do what I'm gonna do. Right, you do. And so this lady eventually storms off saying

she's gonna call the Federal Election Commission. She storms off back to her car. Like, I'm not waiting in line. I already know that this is, you know, there's already fraud going on. I'm calling the election, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, National Election fraud committee.

Whatever she, and people are like clapping. They're like, yeah, you know, yeah, you go away. So this is like, people are fucking, they're unhinged. I mean, people are just unhinged. Yeah. Yes. I voted.

I'm just gonna leave it alone. I voted. I voted. I voted. I hope it's nothing like my story. Yeah. But I mean, listen also, this lady could have just been very mentally ill and just thought that she was in charge of elections.

I can't. I think fucking Venezuela, lady. I mean, you know. There was clearly something off. Clearly, something off. How embarrassing to have your underwear tucked into your... Oh, yeah. You ever done that?

I... Ever had your clothing tucked into your underwear? You ever done that? Hey, hold the... You ever done that? You got pictures on that outfit? I did have a similar situation happen where there was a dress involved that in a backpack involved and it kind of creeped up and I didn't notice that it was creeping up.

What kind of dress? Like my waist. What kind of dress? A little bit like a show. There's that. There's the toilet paper on the shoe, which has happened. There's also a time a specific time I could think of and I have a problem with pepper getting into my teeth and I love pepper You have a problem with pepper getting into your teeth. I've got certain teeth and gums that I don't know if you're

So that they're conducive to black pepper getting into my teeth teeth interesting I was out to lunch with the client. That's an interesting picadilla. I was out to lunch with the client. And I had a nice chicken Caesar salad, put black pepper, you know, on that salad and it was delicious. And I got in the car after I left and looked in the mirror, you know, just like a little mirror check and boom, huge piece of pepper.

And my tooth, I called the guy and I said, hey, look, we're gonna do a business together and I'm gonna need you to let me know. Well, these things, I saw it there and I really wanted to say something. I go, well now you know, just say it, just tell somebody. I, yeah. And we ended up becoming great business partners

for a long time. I would know. Sometimes embarrassing things are bonding. Yeah, I agree with you. Things too. You know, like early on in a relationship, those little things that you do, like you got to, you got to snooze in your bogey or something like that, you know. Yes. Or hey, you're dick-sanging out of your hands. You know, stuff like that. Stuff like that. Stuff like that. Stuff like that. I got me thinking about like super embarrassing story.

I mean, there's, we all have those stories, right? Toilet paper on the underwear, your fly's undone. The older I get, the more I find that my fly is undone for whatever reason. I've got a best friend, Raphael. And he, for instance, the day that I have known him, he is infamous for his fly being undone all the time. It's likely that 75% of the time you see Raphael, he does not have his pants as hip-to.

To the point where sometimes I wonder if it's on purpose. Hey, look down here. No, he's just like, I'm a little tick off the list. It doesn't happen. It's just a little picadilla. Yeah. But it got me thinking about this lady, well, I think the least embarrassing thing

about this lady's appearance at the voting place was the underwear. She did lots of other things to be embarrassed about. But clearly, that wasn't on her mind. It got me thinking about super embarrassing stories. And I've got a number of them, right? But I think one of the more embarrassing stories, you know, when you're a teenager, things are like they're 10x, right? Everything's 10x when you're a teenager. That's right. When I was a teenager, I was dating a girl that I liked very much, but we hadn't been dating long. We'd probably been dating about, I don't know, maybe,

however long we were dating. It was a short amount of time. Let's put it that way. And I was maybe... We love. Yeah. Teenage love. Yeah.

Stop it right now. You're asking for the bar. So, it was... What about a fly on your head? Oh, no, was about a fly on your head. Oh, no, never had a fly on my, I mean, I've had flies on my head, but not a national television for six and a half minutes. That was crazy. That was crazy.

Like that fly just hung out. Like flies don't hang out. That's not what they do. They fly from one thing and we've all had experience with flies. They just buzz around. It is as if someone was above him with like one of those fake flies on an invisible, like a piece of floss and it was just like.

It was pretty funny. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Especially when you're trying to be serious. I know and I gotta say poor Mike Pence. I mean, he's just like, he's never gonna live that down.

Never ever gonna live that down. Now, that was so embarrassing. So, I'm 17 or 17, for a bastard. So I'm 16 or 17 years old. And it's right after Thanksgiving. And me and this girl have been out to get Wendy's or something to eat or back at my house.

At my house when I'm a child, there's a three-story house and there's a basement and the middle level is the kitchen and the living room and the dining room and all that stuff. So we walk into the garage door, into the kitchen, and my family is there. My father, my mother, and my youngest brother Patrick. Is there Patrick? He's pretty young at the time. He's nine years younger than I am, so he's got to be like 10 or 11, maybe a year's old. Yeah. Yeah, maybe even a little bit younger than that. And they are on their way out to go get a Christmas tree. So me and this young lady, we retire down to the basement. In the basement, my brother lived down there, and he had a set up, like a set up in this big room.

It was a couch, it was a big bed, it was a television, like a big screen TV at the time, one of those bulky, big screen TVs. And that was in one room, then there were French doors that had no locks on them, so just kind of the French doors that just kind of pop open, right? And then there was a set of French doors to the exterior of the house, right? And then there was a set of French doors to the exterior of the house, right?

And so the French doors to the exterior of the house is where you could go out the side of the house. It's where I, as another young man, as another story was told, that I jumped off the patio to save my neighbors from crime and and for us. That's right. You're the neighborhood watch that evening. So we quickly went downstairs and then I went to the bath and when I came back to the bath and this young lady had taken off most of her clothing and was sitting on the couch and it was like you know now I I was amorous on a heartbeat I was like yes right. Yes. The couch is next to the bed and so we jumped on the bed You know, now I- Ding! I was amorous on a heartbeat. I was like, yes, right?

Yes. The couch just next to the bed, and so we jumped on the bed. And when we jumped on the bed, now we're both mostly undressed, and she is on top of me. This wasn't... I don't know.

There wasn't maybe 30 minutes that had passed since someone had gone... Said parents had gone to get the Christmas tree. And all of the sudden, the two French doors into the room pop open. And there's Patrick with one side of the Christmas tree. And my parents were the other,

I had a Christmas tree. And I like, I sat up, right? I sat up and it kind of threw this young lady off me kind of fell off my little brother had some expression like woolly shit my dad is like Patrick language Brian Green everyone get dressed upstairs upstairs now. And I was like, oh shit, I am fucking busted. This girl went in the heat behind the couch. I don't know where she went. She was gone. That's where it burgers things to me.

Oh my God, yeah, this for her, this is mortifying, right? Everybody's scrambling. You know, and so I quickly got dressed and I knew that I had to immediately go face the music. Right, it's gonna be worse if I just stay down here, so I'm gonna go face the music. So, I tell this girl, I'm like, I'm so sorry, like just hang out here, I'll smooth it over with my dad, like, you know, he's cool, he's really not cool, but he'll try to be cool. I'll figure it out, don't worry about it.

So, I go upstairs, and my dad is like, in the good fuck he's going on down there I told you don't you get out of women down you cannot close the door when women are over this absolutely inappropriate Look at your little brother. Yeah, look at your little brother. He's traumatized. Then I look at Patrick's not traumatized He's like sweet bro Good job Right and so I want you to go downstairs and tell the lady, she is, you are no longer having people over tonight. You're just kidding me right there.

I went downstairs and she was gone. She was gone and I didn't talk to her for another four months. I didn't talk to her for another four months. She didn't have like a home, like there were not cell phones at the time, you know, not ones that everybody had, but so you had to call someone's house and she didn't have like a home, like we, there were not cell phones at the time, you know, not ones that we everybody had, but so you had to call someone's house. And she didn't have her own line. She had her parents line. So I had to call her parents line, right? And so it's, you know, her mom would pick up

almost every time and be like, nope, she is not here, right? Like I know whatever story was told when she walked in the door was not what actually happened, but clearly it was my fault. Right. Clearly you're bad influence. Never been, I mean, like my fault. Right. It's clearly your bad influence. Never been, I mean, like I was aunt and then here's the thing is that then that story got a little bit bastardized, but then told around the school, right? And so it was a little, you know, so people be like, oh man, I heard your dad, or your dad dodged, bunking your girlfriend.

I heard you couldn't get it up, you know, like stuff your dad, or your dad, God, just bunking your girlfriend. I heard you couldn't get it up, you know, like stuff like that, right? And it just all became this, you know, meshed story. For like a month, it was like, I just was so mortified. So embarrassed running around my school is around avoid people like, you know.

Did you see her at school? No, she didn't go to my school. So that's why we didn't talk for like three months, four months. Yeah, I mean, we later on in life, we connected and we became friends, right? But that pretty much ended the, I mean, certainly ended the relationship for sure.

I think because she was so embarrassed that this had happened that she knew that she was never gonna be able to show her face around my family again, that she was like, I'm just gonna give up on it because we all, everyone lives with their parents out. So what are we gonna do? I'm never gonna give up on it, because, you know, everyone lives at their parents' house. What are we gonna do? I'm never gonna see his dad again, right? And, you know, you know, you're in shining

to the entire universe. Did you guys trim the tree that night? Oh, I was trimming the tree, hardly. The freshly bobbed trees. I put the star right on top. Ha-ha-ha. Ha-ha-ha. Ha-ha-ha. Ha-ha-ha. I'm picturing the tree lighting ceremony after that. Me and this young girl is naked just running around the tree putting garland and dashes

of tinsel. Right. The stuff that you find like six months later. Oh my God. So that was the embarrassment there caused by... That's a good one. Listen, it was an accident. No one could have known that that was gonna happen.

I couldn't have predicted that the tree would be gotten that quickly nor did I predict that they would come into the basement with the fucking Christmas tree. My pop open. Pop open the door. I mean, you could have gone in the front door now. But my little brother used to run. I mean, my little brother caused a lot of embarrassment.

Patrick especially caused a lot of embarrassment with the girls that I dated when I was a teenager. Because they knew that the basement, the basement, even it was a kind of subterranean, but there were a few windows at the top. Yeah. And then there of subterranean, but there were a few windows at the top, and then there were the French doors, and then there were a couple of windows. And so, and at nighttime, there were no coverings on these windows, and so at nighttime, I couldn't see how it is all black.

You know, you go light on, it's black, but we would run around the basement, and have whatever girl we were dating down there, for a few minutes. And much later on, like five or six years later, Patrick told me that, you know, when his, him and his friends would have spent the night so their favorite activity was going down to the window.

It was, you know, six feet in the air and spy on him what was going on downstairs. I'm like, what the fuck are you, really? And he's like, oh yeah, yeah. Oh yeah, it was a thing. I learned about love from you, but, got all my tricks from you and I'm well. You are a solid C minus in the bed.

Just like me. That's it. You get when you have little brothers. They're little, you know, they're little shit heads for sure. Of course. God, your family has the three four boys. Four boys. So I, you know, you've talked about your mom having to go away. of course god your family has the third had the three four boys four boys so I you know you've talked about your mom having to go away a couple of times

yeah she had to go to and I have a clear more clear picture of why that happened after visiting my sister oh yeah I mean this past week I mean it's whoa it's a lot and I can only imagine you, and your brothers, I know your brothers, and I know you. So you guys had to be a handful. We were all troublemakers to some degree, but then you add on top of that, just the kind of, the,

in listen, everyone has a strange way of growing up. Everyone's got family stuff, right? And so, but, yeah, our hearts were, we were just kind of left alone for, for certain periods of time. Yeah. So we were up to trouble because there was no Nothing there was no one there to guide us

But we had the opportunity to get into trouble. That's no fault of anybody's It's me and my parents did the best they could but it was just there was ample space and time to figure out what we shouldn't be doing and do that right? Well, there were two of them four of you. That's right, they were. So, yeah. And I was like the wall breaker. I was like a nice breaker on a ship, right? I was just, whatever kind of trouble I could get into, I was going first and I was getting into it

and then the boys were getting in my way, can you? Behind, I did, I was the same way. I was kind of like the first to try things and then my sisters would say, oh, that didn't work out for. She's grounded for three months. That's right. Oh, okay. Brian had sex to the, Brian had sex for the first time. Woo, yeah, we can do that now. Oh, the girl said she was pregnant. Oh, he's grounded for four months now. I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do that. Right, they learned.

Yeah, they learned, you know, it's trial and error, but I'm the one doing the trial and error. And I'm the one that bears the breath. Oh, we smoked pot. What's gonna happen? Two weeks grounding, not bad. Not bad. I think I can do that.

I can do that. I got that. I'll just get some more pot so I can smoke it while I'm grabbed. Meanwhile, you know, I'm like, you know, handcuffed to the wall in my room. With nothing but a transistor radio, you know, do more code to my friends. Patrick's got a TV, a DVD player, brand new soccer shoes, you know, and he's like, hey, dude, what's up?

You want some of this, you want some of this, a cushion? And I'm like, where does he get Cush? You remember when Dad took it from you? Right. I know the combination to Dad's safe. I got it. Oh, then that's mine. No, no, no, no, no, Dad told you, no, no,

you're in trouble. You can't smoke that stuff. But you can watch TV if I remember. You can watch me, smoke that stuff. Yeah, you can watch TV in my room. I'll turn it up real loud. You can listen to it. You're handcuffed, you're so awful in my group. I'll turn it up real loud, you can listen to it. You're handcuffed, you know.

I swear to God, I'm just like, handcuffed to the bed. In Patrick, you know, that's the way it is ending at all families. And you know, my son's gonna be the same way. He's gonna go and he's gonna test us. He's gonna test us. And we're gonna be shocked by the stuff that he does.

And then me is gonna do it. And we're not gonna be shocked at all. We're gonna be like, like, what the fuck is this? Yeah, it's not that big of a deal. Not that big of a deal. Yeah, I don't know what about it. And the D is gonna be like, what the fuck? I know. I got a handcuff to the bed for six weeks for that. Yeah, but when you did it, it seemed like a big deal. When she did it, it didn't seem like a big plus, you know, she's cute. That's the way it was. That's how it was when you were growing up in a family. Everyone was pushing the boundaries, but the oldest pushes the boundaries in a way that leads the way for everybody else. Absolutely. And I certainly took that charge.

I was like, let's go, let's get them done. My four fucking father, honestly, and my mother, my four mother and father, they really, they just tried. Yeah, it's such a truth for them, you know, when you're young, for them to say, you just wait till you have kids. And you're like, yeah, whatever.

I'm never gonna be this mean to my kids. That's never gonna, never gonna. And then later on, you're older and you're like, yeah, whatever. I'm never gonna be this mean to my kids. I've never got a, never. And then later on you're older and you're like, oh yeah. I already had it. I had to have good. What did they have to go through? What did they have to go through?

Oh my God. Yeah, I, I, I think everybody says this, like I'm not gonna be like my parents, right? Yeah. All we think about selfishly is the stuff that our parents did that we didn't like. But we never thought about how difficult it is being a parent. And now that I'm a parent, I'm like,

oh, this shit is tough. Yeah. It's like I was telling my dad yesterday, I'm like, I didn't expect you have to take care of him between the iPhone selfies. I thought everyone was posting about their kids. It looked cool. Now I'm gonna take care of them.

Right. It was the pumpkin patch. Do you jump shit? And then I the pumpkin patch. That's coming up there. The yearly pumpkin patch photo. Oh, I know. Matias will be screaming and crying. Someone will be holding the upside down by her foot. Can you get her to smile? You're hanging off the hay, right?

The back of the hay. I know. It's like it's so Clarkler as well. This is the never it all you have this. You have this idea of what it's all going to be. And it's just different, but precious in its own way. You just have a you just have to know that you just have to know that there's only more and enough patience. You just have to know that there's only enough patience. You just have to know that there's only 30 more years of this. Right. Yeah. Or as my dad would say, 15 more years, you're out.

You took me to Wendy's one time. But if you need to ride somewhere, I'm going to go smoke a cigarette. I'm going to smoke a cigarette. I'm gonna make it work. If I can make it here, I can make it anywhere. I'm gonna make it on my own. If I can make it here, I can make it anywhere. My dad's like, where?

He's called. I'm fine. North Atlanta? I'm gonna hit the big tree. He's a brother run away. Yeah, and my mom would go, I'll help you back your back. Let's do it. She called her shit. No. Well, I don't you back your back. Let's do it. She called your shit.

No. Well, I don't have anywhere to stay tonight, but tomorrow. I don't want to pack right now, but tomorrow. I'd run away with all the intention of coming back home, but my dad would lock me out of the house. Right. Maybe like, I'll show you. Yeah.

Or my twin brother would help me pass, which is even worse. We got one out. I know. Sweet. Ah! Go to www.tcbpodcast.com. That's where you can find all the show notes, read more about Chrissy and I, and you can listen all the episodes watching on YouTube, all that that good stuff at the commercial break on Instagram and

Facebook and then we'll be giving away some swag We'll go straight into the after show after this you can do that by joining the Breakroom at WWE that TCB podcast.com. I know we got lots of new listeners because we can see it We got lots of new listeners this week. Chrissy. So thanks everyone to back in That's what you choose you either that or it's just a one It was a one one time shot. And they were like, fuck these guys.

Welcome back. Keep leaving the positive reviews on all your favorite podcasts, platforms. We appreciate it. If you got any show suggestions to let us know, like we're open for creating an open dialogue here. Absolutely. Yeah, infoattscbpodcast.com.

We'd love to hear from you. We do get feedback from the fans. We'd love to hear more of it. You have any show ideas? You want us to talk about a subject? Do you want to come on? I'm thinking about taking phone calls. I like the phone call idea too.

I like the phone call idea too. And technically, I think I figured out how we can do it without causing a lot of drama. So if you're interested in being on the show drop us a line info at tcbpodcast.com and someone will get back to you about being on the show if you're interested in talking about something even if it's something that we don't agree about. So instead of leaving a nasty message on one of the podcast platforms just drop us an email. We'll talk about it on air. How's that? Well, they have a nice Frank general discussion on air. You know who I'm talking to.

We didn't hear at all from Headree from Podcast Universe today. Oh, he's on vacation. He's on vacation. He's looking for his wife. He's out voting. All right, so for Chrissy and I, it's Brian Green. This has been The Commercial Break, and we will talk to you next Wednesday. Bye!

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