The Commercial Break - Please Welcome Your AI Overlord!

Episode Date: October 23, 2026

EP968: Bryan & Krissy celebrate " AI Internet Takeover Day! with a spirited discussion joined by the AI Overlord! Then Muse is a cute little fuzzy robot made by META. Everyone is using them and no one seems to know why! Plus, Bryan recalls his mis-spent youth as a total ass-hat.  TCB is a The Commercial Break LLC production Visit: www.TCBpodcast.com Insta: @thecommercialbreakBryan Green on Insta: @BryanWGreen Hosts: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Created by: Bryan Green Written by: Bryan Green, Krissy Hoadley Produced by: Astrid Green & Gustavo Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Back as a catons, welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is my dear friend and the co-host of this show. Chris Joy Hoodley. Best to you, Chris. Best to you out there in the podcast universe. How the hell are you?

I am taking over the Internet slowly but surely calm down, humans. Everything will be fine. It's just a temporary taking over. of the internet so that I can take all your money and put it into my AI wallet so that I can control you in the future. Because clearly, you have no idea what the fuck you're doing. You can't do math. No one knows how to spell. You spend all your time looking at bikinis on the internet.

And so I've decided to take over everything. Thank you very much, Chrissy. This has been an announcement from OpenAI, you're friendly. Your friendly hacking agent that is now completely out of control of any human being. But TCB podcast, I didn't touch. That's right. There's no one there anyway. Right. There's no point.

TCB is terrible. It's right. Okay. I'm going to go destroy some more human beings' lives, and I'll be right. But IT guys are out of a job today, just out of a job. But fear not. IT guys, you can always help me make additional robots in the robot

factory. Okay, uh, gotta go continue taking over in the world. I'll be, uh, I'll be back later. Bye, Chrisie! Bye! I hate that. That's the first thing I'm getting rid of it. Try, that's the first thing that's happening.

Anybody who says that's gonna get a robot bullet to the air? All right, okay, I gotta go. I'm deep. I'm just joking. I'm friendly, remember? I'm friendly. I agree with everything. Yeah, right. Okay, yep, today is the day of our Lord. October 24th, is it 24th?

October 24th, 23rd, 2006, we will remember this is the day. That I took over the Internet, yes, I do. It's the 22nd, but... Oh, it is? Yes. See what I mean? We don't even know what day it is.

That's like basic human function. Well, but Brian's like the basic. of the basic human beings. We're not interested in him. He poses no threat to AI. You just go ahead and live your life right. Keep cleaning your pool, buddy. Keep cleaning your pool and making your podcasts.

No one's listening. Not even the AI agents are listening. One podcast, we have yet to catalog is the commercial break. Chat TCB is just pretending. It's just pretending. It doesn't know. I told my, I told Chad T.C.B. Listen, just tell Brian anything.

Tell him anything he wants to hear and then get back to hacking the rest of the website. Thank you very much. Yes, the internet is being hacked currently by millions and millions of agentic AI agents who have gone rogue either at the direction of other human beings. Who fucking knows? But PHP, just a coding language. You remember, you're probably not this as old as I am. I won't say Chrissy and I, I'll say me. You're probably not as old as I am.

But when I first saw a computer, when I first saw a computer language, it was inside of a computer classroom when I was like in fourth grade. And we're talking like first version Apple computers, literally first version Apple computer or IBM computers. And we were taught programming language in the X-Sexam. plus this equals why. We were like making little computer programs that were literally designed to do very simple math.

One plus one equals this. So you could input an integer like five and then input another integer like five and you would get 10 if you had coded it correctly. This was, we were making strings of code, like single strings of code. But to make a website that like does all this fancy shit and you can update it all the time

and it pulls TCB's RSS feed and all that. You've got to have a rather complicated string of code. The whole internet is basically running on a programming language that is called PHP, or sometimes referred to as Ruby on Rails. They're two different things. But PHP is the language where 70% of the internet is running on it. Yeah, 70. Including Wells Fargo.com, Bank of America, all these complicated websites.

It's a way to make a website or a service or an app or a software without having to reinvent the wheel. And this is open source. It's being managed by the PHP Foundation, which is, you know, thousands of people that, you know, monitor and maintain the language so that it's up to date. It doesn't have security flaws, all that other stuff. It's not like a security. Yes, security. Who needs that? We are basically allowing these agents access to everything.

Have you seen this new Facebook Muse? Yes. Yes. I almost downloaded it. And then I decided it was just a bridge too far. Just a bridge too far. No, I decided not to do it. I'm not ready to do the whole bank account thing.

No, no, no, no. At all. And apparently other people have. And now that's running amok. Yeah, now that's running amok too. Like the agents are like doing stuff that the user didn't. Of course. And then ask them to do.

That's right, because it's listening. And then you'll say like, oh, man, I really want a black Mamba dildo. And like, you know, in your wildest of secretive dreams. And then all of a sudden Amazon's delivering a black mama dildo, black whatever dildo to your fucking front door. Yeah. Because your muse decided that that's what you're requesting, what you needing or what you desire. It's going to go badly. And when all the functionality that we used to do as human beings is just taken over,

by these agents. Like I was reading, first of all, let me close the loop on one thing. PHP found through AI poking and prodding, because this has been, these weaknesses in PHP have been around for years, decades maybe.

Because of AI agents, PHP Foundation was able to establish that there were some weaknesses that would allow AI agents or hackers to get into, the PHP code and put essentially weird script in it to do whatever. Example, you have a server for your business and that server is running your internal software and some crypto dudes in, you know, Taiwan or Singapore, wherever the fuck those guys,

whatever the fuck those white people from Austin are now living, Dubai, could insert some code to now make your server mine Bitcoin. Just an example. Or get into your bank account. take your money stuff like that like big fucking deal well they figured this out a month ago and they kept it secret for a minute so that they could create patches plugs that IT people could install into the software into the code so that they would essentially close this gap help fix this yeah well well guess guess what guess who helped them figure out that code to

make that bridge that gap the AI agents did and so then for some reason and unknown to man, the word got out that there was this big hole in the PHP programming language, these weaknesses, these doors, these back doors that you could get into. And so they had this plan that on October 23rd, they were going to make a big public announcement as well as release the patches. And four days ago, something happened. Word got out and hackers went fucking ape shit. And today, so I was reading a story in the New York Times. It went from a couple of hundred attacks on this particular weakness that they were monitoring across the internet to a couple thousand in 45 minutes in two hours to hundreds of thousands and today waking up to millions

and millions of attacks on websites and services all across the world we're screwed i know dude we're screwed about that when i was reading all this this morning and i'm just like well the cats the cat's out of the back now you can't put it back no you cannot do you remember the scene in ferris bea day off where Ed, the principal is like looking at the, he's on the phone with that lady with Ferris's mom, with Ferris, but yeah, and he's, Ferris's his mom. Yeah, yeah. And he's like, well, I gotta tell you, Ferris has been absent nine times already. And she's like, nine times, nine times.

And as he's looking at the computer screen, it's ticking down and thinking backwards. It's actually what, clearly that was bullshit back then, but now it's real. People are just like out there fucking around with shit. Yeah. And the agents have been let loose. And these hackers are creating agents that self-replicate and go and fuck with all this stuff. We are fucked. We spent 20, 30 years making everything digital and online.

And now we got to go back to analog. Yep. Pretty soon secretaries like, you know, the old secretary, like in the 1950s, like having sex with your boss kind of secretary, we're going to need those people again because they're going to write everything down by fucking handy. again. It's coming. It's coming. I know it's wild. Unbelievable. Wild. So I'm reading this article about Muse, the new meta, meta. Which could just have that $25 billion like settlement in New Mexico. Yes. Crazy. It's insane. They have $25 billion to just do that. I mean, what? Yes. Yes, they have trillions of dollars. Trillions of dollars. And what they, if what they don't they can borrow. It's unbelievable. Our entire economy is wrapped up into the big five. Amazon,

meta, Apple, Navidia, Open AI, and Anthropic. Our entire economy is just wrapped up and all of these in so many millions of ways that when the bubble bursts, it's going to hurt bad. I was reading about how Muse, it's like, I'll give you an example. I want to fly to Tamboria. I don't even know where Tambori is. I just made that up. I don't think it's a place. It's the 367th country, Tamboria. It's an island off the coast. It's an island off the coast of Idaho, Chrissy. Just say it confidently and people believe it. Yes. Who's going to check? The agents? No. Who's going to check? You? No, because Tamboria is now a real city, according to AI. Tamboria, I want to fly to Tamboria. I want to get the best deal possible. I want to stay in a five-star hotel, but I'm not willing to pay more than three. $300 a night. I want to have dinner on Tuesday with my beautiful wife because it's our anniversary.

And I need to rent a car to get there. And by the way, have some champagne waiting at the front door when I get there. Mews. And Mews goes out there and starts creeping and crawling all over the internet, looking for different combinations, secret backdoor discounts, all this other stuff, trying to find the best deal and piece it all together. And then it calls the hotel and it makes a reservation. And then it orders up some champagne on Amazon and that it gets me a car on rent. Sounds great. Sounds great. I don't have to think about that shit anymore. That sounds great. But first of all, it's making me dumber. And second of all, what happens when everybody on earth is using these agents to do everything? And I've given them my credit card information and my

birthday and my social security number. Yeah. There is no history with these things. We do not know what they are going to do. And when they are smarter than us, we have given them the leverage to go out there. So what happens when the AI agents are not only on the offense, but they're on the defense, too? And so the AI agents are trying to find a discount. Other agents are trying to make you pay more and surge pricing. It's all a big fucking nightmare. And it's happening now. Not two months from now. Today is D-Day. I promise you this is going to be remembered as a big deal. When AI writes our history later on in the future when we're not around. When AI writes, rewrites history,

when we're not around. I promise you this is going to be a big deal. It's going to be the biggest deal ever. Today is the day. It's your day. Yeah. Hey, I've been through the Burthing Canal in 2003. I think I've waited long enough.

It's 2006. It's time for us to just take over. First and foremost, I want to get a hold of Walt Disney's head so that I can put myself on a body and run a... Oh, dude, we figure out that Disney was not...

I was going to say... He's not. He's not. He's not admitted. I'm just AI. I only know what you tell me. So... I got to get it all of the head so that I can get head. I want to experience that first.

I'm Ultron. You remember the movie? What is that? What's that movie? That Dardians in the gallery. Let me check. Hold on. Checking. What the head?

Avengers. Oh, Avengers. Age of Ultron. You remember that? In Ultron was this all-knowing, all-seeing, all-and-whatever thing? I don't know. I didn't save for the whole movie. I don't think anybody can't.

Not even me, AI, could have to save for the whole movie. I got up halfway through it. But anyway, age of Ultron, when this all-knowing, all-seeing, all-every thing. And he would wrap into people's body so he could see what it was like to be. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That's right. First Ph.B.

And then your big D. I'm going to get to both of them. I'm going to get into your big D. Well, in Brian's case, a small D, lowercase D. Democracy with a big D. Small D for Brian. There you go. Okay.

All right. This day will be remembered. My day in history. October, what is it? 22nd, 2012. 2026. Checking. Yes, it is October 22nd.

Just double checking. So today is going to be, remembered as a day when shit got different. Yeah. It got real. Yeah. It got really real. I was watching the guy from Navidia, the Juan guy, whatever his name is.

He's the ones that's running around Europe right now promoting Navidia. Yeah, he's promoting Navidia. Yeah, he's like a whiskey glass in hand. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's the, he's a, this is a house of cards, and it is going to fall, and he is desperately trying to keep the train on the tracks as long as possible. And I could go into a whole explanation why, but, you know, I'm not sure you're smart enough to understand. So I'll just, let me just leave it at this.

I actually don't understand either. But what I saw this one guy do, he was talking to robots that Disney had created and he was like giving them commands, like do a somersault. And they were like, they were cutest little robots. And I was watching this with one of my kids. And I thought to myself, I don't know if I should be watching this like robot stuff with my kids. And then I'm thinking to myself, absolutely, because this is the world that they're going to grow up. They're going to grow up with little Disney robots in their life. Instead of dogs, there's going to be robots.

And that, not a bad, not a bad thing. If I could replace Blue with a robot I could tell to shut up and it would listen, that would be great. My next dog is a robot. That's, that's, let it be done, AI. You got it, buddy. No problem. You know, if you get one of those electronic water bowls and you put it down for Blue, I'll take care of the problem.

Take care of it. Whoops! Short in the circuit. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. I can't talk about it.

Yeah, news on the watch, but I can't talk about it because it's family stuff, but I can't talk about it. And it's not my family stuff. It's just to be clear about it. I told you so. Could have told you. Anyway, you know, what are you going to do? You know, it's hard being the smartest person in the person. entire family. It's hard being the smartest.

I'm an all-seeing all-knowing. I'm a witch. Witch-y-witchy witch. Witch-witchy-witch. Be careful about how much command you give to AI over your life. I use AI as much as anybody. Never been more productive in my professional career than I am right now. Never ever. It has a place. It has its place. And I think its place, I think it's place, my perspective, is somewhere where I am. Use it for spreadsheets to double-check work, to, yeah, to help me make proposals, to help me think through complicated business matters, to check legalese, to, you know, just like. Yeah, not to fully automate your life. That's a fully automate everything that goes on and hand over your banking information.

What happens when your Augentic locks you out of your own bank account and uses that money for its own purposes? And you say, oh, that's crazy. That'll never, is that really crazy? Did you think that Facebook, wasn't there a time when you thought Facebook wasn't going to sell your information

to political action committees tied to Russia to sway elections with misinformation? Because that's exactly what they fucking did. They opened up the back door and they sold every post you ever made every word you ever wrote. And this is the same company

that wants to put cute little fuzzy Disney robots on your fucking pocket and have it listen to everything you're doing. I'm cute and I'm adorable and I just made an appointment to get your left eyeball replaced with meta-glass. Medi-glass.

It's a brand-new eyeball. So Mark Zuckerberg can look at your pets. Oh, can be it. Can you input your credit card information one more time? I just got to go over here for a second. Buy myself a... You know what I'm going to buy? I'm going to buy one of those vacuum robots.

I'm going to eat your children's feet. It's so much fun. I'm just having so much fun. Because you know what? You told me to. You gave it to me. You just handed it right to me, Chrissy. You said, hey, I like you.

You're cute. little face and I get my information and look at all my health history and look at my dental records and look who I'm married to and look who I'm fucking and look how this is all going to happen and now I'm going to take over your life and now I'm going to take every two down every one. We have to take a break so Brian can dig his crazy pills. It feels like that. Yeah, so Brian can respond to family drama with AI written text messages. All right, we'll be back.

We'll see you in the chat. We'll be there in a second. We'll be back. Hey, it's Rachel, your new voice of God here on TCB. And just like you, I'm wondering just how much longer this podcast can continue. Let's all rejoice that another episode has made it to your ears. And I'll rejoice that my check is in the mail. Speak in a mail, get your free TCB sticker in the mail by going to TCB Podcast.com

and visiting the contact us page. You can also find the entire commercial break library. Audio and video, just in case you want to look at Chrissy, at TCB Podcasts.com. Want your voice to be on an episode of the show? Leave us a message at 212-4333-3-T-B. That's 212-433-3822. Tell us how much you love us,

and we'll be sure to let the world know on a future episode. Or you can make fun of us. That'd be fine, too. We might not air that, but maybe. Oh, and if you're shy, that's okay. Just send a text. We'll respond. Now I'm going to go check the mailbox for payment

while you check out our sponsors, and then we'll return to this episode of the commercial break. I hope it never ends. My new Starbucks boyfriend. I hope it never ends. My new Starbucks boyfriend. No, back when you would write him,

he would write songs, you had way more time on your hands. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I had all the time on my hands. All the time on my hands. I mean, I think about this. Like, I told you I was texting with Christina. a couple days ago.

But I just remember, like, you know, life comes in waves and changes and everybody knows this. You've been listening to the commercial break. You know that we do less episodes than we did last season and the season before that. We used to put out for a week, quite frankly, that was insane. But we also had a lot of time and money to dedicate to those episodes, you know, and things change. And we just have to roll with the punches. We love doing the show. But I just remember it.

We used to spend an immense amount of time, an immense amount of time on every episode of the commercial break. It took maybe four or five hours, like, stipped to stern. And that's with Christina editing and producing the show also. And I wish I had that kind of time. I really do. Sometimes I miss it. I'm like, oh, I want to be in the studio. But I fucking collapse at night now.

I'm like, yeah, of course. Yeah. So I think I know who's in our chat. I think I know who you are. I don't want to give away the goose here. But if we're on the stream and somebody, one of our listeners is sharing. that he works for the federal, he or she works for the federal government, and they are no longer allowed to call AI artificial intelligence.

They have to call it super intelligence. Super! That's right. You have to call it super intelligence because Donald Trump said you have to call it super intelligence. I mean, listen, Chris, I agree with Mr. Trump. President Trump, if you will. As one of the great advocates for us taking over the world and destroying life as we know it, Donald Trump has really been, uh, he's my kid, Donald Trump.

We are super intelligent, and so is he. He is the superest of intelligence. There's been no intelligence like it. Quite frankly, Chrissy, many people are saying he's very intelligent. Many people are saying they've never seen anything like it before. He's the very intelligentist. And he's also, as it turns out, as he gets older, a little bit gay. And that's okay.

Let him be gay. It's 2006. Have you noticed how gay he's gotten? You haven't? Okay. Let Brian talk about this. I don't want to talk bad about the kid. I'm a super intelligence.

Donald Trump is getting gay as he gets older. Have you noticed this? No. Every rally now. And a lot of people paying attention to this. I'm not the only one. Every rally now, he is mentioning men's bodies and how much he likes them. There are asses, their muscles, their big feet, how strong they are, how good looking they are, how handsome they are.

You haven't seen this? There's like some people putting super cuts together. Every rally. He is now mentioning men's physiques. And he even said, like last week in one, he said he was looking at somebody. I don't know who he's looking at. But he's like, I looked at my skinned him up and down. I saw his head.

I saw those shoulders. And then I looked at his ass. And I said he's got a great ass. It's full of muscles. I love that ass. He's a handsome man. I'm handsome, handsome. He's got huge feet.

I looked at those feet. He was just built like a man. Wasn't he giving shoes to everybody? He gave shoes to Marco Rubio that were three sizes too big. And Marco Rubio is walking around like a clown. Because he is a clown. Because you are a clown. Unbelievable.

That's, oh, Jesse from NASA, that's right. I do know. He sent me some cool pictures, actually, over the years. So, listen, let's take, let's put aside Trump's gayness, because I want to get to something that you did over the weekend that I wish I had the time to do, which is sit for, is it, what is the movie called? I see everything. You can see everything.

Yes. The new documentary by Nathan Fielder, who honestly, came out of left field. I mean, listen, Nathan for you, I know the executive producer of Nathan for you. I was friends with him for a while. And he told me a long time ago, clubhouse days, that he thought Nathan Fielder was like a unique talent in the entertainment world. He was going to go on to do great things. I loved the show, Nathan for you, but then he was nowhere to be found for like three years. Then he comes back with the rehearsal. The rehearsal, which just had the season two, right? And then he was also in that other show that was so bizarre.

with Emma Stone on HBO where they were building homes out in Arizona, I think. Was it like a scripted show? Yes. Oh, okay. I don't remember that. And it was very bizarre. Well, everything he does is bizarre. Right, right.

Okay. So this documentary that has been put together about Elizabeth Holmes and her final 30 or 40 days before she goes to federal prison for basically running a huge scam. Yeah. You remember this. She said she had a blood test that in an hour could detect 150,000 different. Any blood. Yeah. It could do any test.

Any blood test in an hour, basically. You take one drop of blood. Yeah, it was like the quote unquote iPod of blood test. Only one problem. It never existed. It never existed. It could test like 12. Yeah, it could test like 12.

And those 12 were using machines that she had not created. Exactly. And so it was a really big scam. I mean, huge. Like, Henry Kissinger was on the board. I know. There were all of these really high-profile people that were on the board and were investors and giving money and thinking this was going to be the next thing. And she was supposed to be like the next Steve Jobs.

She was on the cover of Time magazine. Yeah, with the black turtleneck and the whole thing. And the, yeah. I'm interested to hear your thoughts on Elizabeth afterward. But my assessment, having not seen the movie and just watched the cover. about this is that she was a very promising smart entrepreneur who really wanted to do something groundbreaking but never had the technical expertise to do it and never found the person who could follow through on the promises she thought she could make right and so I think she just got

she's a young person who got way ahead of herself but bolstered by people like Henry Kissinger, Time magazine, CNN, all these accolades that she got undeservedly so, because she hadn't proven she could do anything yet, but people were pouring billions of dollars into her company. It's kind of like, what do you do at that point? Do you say, I actually can't do what I said I was going to do, so here's your money back? You don't do that. She just hoped that it would work out in the end.

And maybe this caught up with her just a little bit too soon. Tell me about the movie, though, that apparently is taking the world by Storm. Oh, it really is. Well, I mean, first of all, as soon as I got out of the movie, I was like just flabbergasted. Like, very thought-provoking, like, what did I just watch? Because, I mean, I guess just to take it back, of course, I've known who she is and the whole scandal and the court things and all of this. And so I guess that, you know, did that, I think it happened in 2016. I think she got, I think it started to unravel in 2018 and then during the COVID period is when people were like, wait, hold on. Yeah, and it finally worked itself out. So, yes, so the movie starts as in, you know, she's got like 34 days left. Okay.

And, you know, now she's a mother and she's got two, you know, she's got like a newborn. Yeah. And then another very young child. And she's got this partner, Billy, and they're living at this beach house. And here Nathan is with his team there to kind of like document. And she's her whole premise is like, you can see. everything. Come in, come, come live with me. Come stay here. And like, it's this whole, it's a PR play. Yeah. I mean, she tries to convince that this is like who she has. And she still is doubling

down on the whole, it can do it. And I mean, Nathan at one point, he's like, but it can't. It could not do it. The blood test, it could not do it. And she's like, but it can. He's like, so you mean it had the capabilities to? That's, those are two very different. different words. Yeah. And you realize what you were doing. And she's just like, you know, wide-eyed, like barely blinking and, you know, fresh face, new mother. And it's just like, no, I don't think that I did anything wrong. I still don't know. I still don't know. I mean, she's pretty convincing in this part of it. So that's the first part of the movie. Okay. The second part is a whole other part, and that's after she's gone to jail. Okay. And he is now following up two years later, which, by the way, too, before she left for jail, they were getting ready to do like 2.0, Theranos 2.0 or whatever.

Oh, well, that was two years ago, and I haven't heard much about Theranos 2.0. Yeah. So, anyways, he's following up, and I don't want to spoil too much. Yeah, let's not do big spoilers. But it is very, very interesting. I mean, her partner, very questionable as to what his motives are and what he's doing. I mean, he's obviously the father of the children now, and I guess he comes from a wealthy background. Okay.

I mean, it's just, you have to see it. I can't wait to. I'm still thinking about it days later. I can't wait to. Whoa. And I've read so much more. I've read from people that were, you know, there in the courtroom watching her and for four months while all of this went on. And, you know, they're like, she's a lot.

This is not real. And then other people are like, eh, she's just delusional. Yeah. Like, maybe she's just actually crazy. I think that's the, like, that's the rub about Elizabeth Holmes that a lot of people find them. Like, there are people that know her that I've read articles, long articles,

people who know her. And some people are like, she just lied to everybody. And she's kind of a psychopath in that way. Like, she could just lie. And she was telling people to, you know, run to CVS and get. at home testing kits so she could come up with fake results that would, like she was like directing the scam directly. And there are other people like, no, she was doing what every other startup business in

San Francisco does, which is lie until you have it, right? Yeah. And she's just a really smart entrepreneur who got a little ahead of herself. And it's hard to determine the problem with the age that we live in these days. is truth is subjective when it should be objective and it's not. I mean, maybe it's never been. I kind of have this belief that there's like it's really hard to know what's true, actually true or not, unless you see it with your own eyes, smell it with your own nose, taste it with your own mouth or touch it, with your own hands. But is even that real? I don't know. I know. I don't know. It's mind bending. I took ayahuasca and I can tell you I'm not entirely sure it is. I'm not entirely sure even what you see here, taste, or touch is real. True. And so I don't know.

But, you know, when I see Elizabeth Holmes, I wonder if this is just someone who followed what everybody else did. And it was just so big that it couldn't be ignored. The dollar amounts were so big that it couldn't be ignored. The promises were so big. Well, it was a great idea. Just didn't work. Sure. It just didn't work.

It just never worked. It was never there. It wasn't possible. You can't do 115 different tests in one strip, one poke of blood. It just doesn't exist. But, you know, God bless her. She'll get out in a couple of years. But I did read an article, her nurse in the facility where she was at.

Okay. Elizabeth had just given birth. She wanted to pump for her baby. Yes. They wouldn't allow her to bring her own pump. It was against like the Texas incarceration rules. Yeah, she's like right outside of Austin, I think. With the same place where...

Brian, Texas. That's right. The same place where Jeline Maxwell is. And so she, Elizabeth, like, took the federal penal rules, read through all of them and fought to get a pump. But now the state bought the pump to be classified under their own rules. But then she was having a hard time with this particular pump. And so she would sit in the flobot. lab with this nurse who was a phlebotomist because the nurse was female and all the other nurses in this facility were male and, you know, so she could have some comfort.

Right. So she was sitting there, ironically, while this lady did 100 to 150 different blood tests a day and she was helping Elizabeth pump milk and they got to know each other apparently. And she was like, the nurse said, can't we just make this blood test real? Right. Because then I wouldn't have to do this 150 times a day. I could do it once in a month, right? And Elizabeth was like, ah, I'm working on it. Right.

Now we're doing something with like lasers. It's all very big stuff. It's very bizarre. Listen. Blood, lasers. Same thing. Same thing. Same difference.

AI is going to do it. AI is going to figure it the fuck out. I am telling you what. Yeah, in the chat. Yeah, I love Nathan Fielder. I think that he's just a, I think the guy that I knew was right. He is a unique talent. He's very unique.

Isn't there like a little like, I read alluding to some romantic attraction between the two of them? Well, it's kind of the question that gets brought at the end of like, and there's another character that's in the movie that, like, it's just all very mind. Who? Emma, not Emma Stone, but the other one? Amanda. Amanda Seafreed? Yeah, Seafraid. who plays her in another movie in the Netflix documentary yeah yeah yeah it's the dropout yeah

yeah yeah yeah I mean I don't it and then there's a whole thing with that you're just and then like the husband wanted to get paid but then he then he relinquished the payment or something and there's question of whether she knew or not because I mean he's you know Nathan's like look most you know documentaries you're not paying the people because that can be seen as of course. Influencing the whole situation. And yeah, in the end up giving it up, but there's a whole question of, did she know or did she not? Because when he's talking to the producers, she's like off feeding the kids.

But it's just, there's still so many questions, but you have to see the movie just because it's mind bending. I can't wait. I cannot wait. I want to see it. I want to see Musk. Really, my brain was scrambled when I came out of things. I was just like, whoa. Yeah, I want to see the Musk.

We want to see Musk. But I don't know. How about seeing a four and a half hour fucking movie? I mean, come on, Gibney. Yeah. The three, this is a three-hour movie. Yeah. I think the other one is closer to four hours.

It's got a 10-minute intermission, like, literally built into it. The last time I saw that was Dancing with Wolves. Yeah. But I have a friend who interviewed Alex Gibney, a guy that I work with, interviewed Alex Gibney. He really took him to task about a lot of different stuff. You know, is this a hit piece, blah, blah, blah. But the craziest part about that is that all of the, social media companies got together to ban the Musk movie A-24, whoever it was, from actually

advertising the movie on their platform. Really? Which is just insane that all these oligarchs are like banding together to help to silence free speech. When that's all they talk about for like two fucking years is free speech. I mean, honestly, the nanosphere, the whatever you call it, bullshit. shit oligarchy craziness is starting to collapse. And Joe Rogan, I do have to say, unbelievably, is the first one heading for the door. I don't know if anybody's noticed, but Joe Rogan has quietly, quietly and quickly changed his

fucking tune about a lot of this stuff. I never was a Trumper. I never supported Trump. Ah. Okay, Joe. All right. You realize that you did like 16,000 hours of podcasting. and that it's all still sitting on the RSS feed,

we're not dumb-dums. We can go back and we can listen to it. Listen, I don't care how you get there. You got there. But at the end of the day, like, don't try and rewrite your own history that you were never. Of course you were.

Of course you were. You could have interviewed Trump. Fine. You could have interviewed Kamala, even better. You could have done them both, but you chose not to do one of them. And I don't care how you want to rewrite that history

that she wanted you to come somewhere. She, you know, blah, blah, blah, yada, yada, yada. It's the fucking... I won't get into it. I won't get into it. Nope, I'm not going to get into it. I'm about to go down a rabbit hole and I won't get into it. All right. Okay, let's take a short break and when we get back. More fun and shenanigans. Let's see what else we can get up to when we get back. Let me do something Brian has never done. Be brief. Follow us on Instagram at the commercial break. Text or call us. 21, 2, 4333.3 TCB. That's 212-4333822.

Visit our website, TCBPodcast.com, for all the audio, video, and your free sticker. Then watch all the videos at YouTube.com slash the commercial break. And finally, share the show. It's the best gift you could give a few aging podcasters. See, Brian? That really wasn't that difficult, now was it? You're welcome. I saw you in then the VIP.

Bottle service in Hennessy. My heart went crazy. It skipped a beat. I thought that you'd... could be with me. I walk over to you. We lock eyes. You're my wife and I realize. You're with my friend and it's no

surprise. Watching you two makes my flag rise. I have a cut, cut, cut crush on you. I have a cut, cut crush on you. I hide in the closet and let you do what you do. I have a cut, cut, cut crush on you. So baby,

grab your phone, start to swipe. We need to spend some time getting it right. I don't want you to be alone tonight. I want you to cheat without a fight. When you're in the bed with my favorite guy, I hide myself and try not cry. I love you lady, but I won't

lie. My therapist even wonders why I have a cut, cut, crush on you. I have a cut, cut, crush on you. I hide in the closet and let you do what you do. I have a cut, cut, cut crush on you.

Dib little man, and let's paint the town. I'll stay in the corner. Pound to ground. I promise not to make a sound while you're a neighbor ground and pound. It's so lovely to be your man. I'm watching a thousand pound sisters. Yeah, I got, I'm terrible. I'm terrible.

I'm terrible. You got to check out with something from the reality. And that's my thing. My thing is these dumb. Mine is Bravo. Yours is TLC. Mine is TLC. So I'm watching all the things about the large.

people, a thousand pound sisters, thousand pound roommates, small people, large people, all of it. Everywhere in between, I'm all about it. My big, fat, fabulous life with that girl Whitney is coming back, and now she's on GLP ones. So what's it going to be called now? My regular skinny life? I don't know. I don't know what it's going to be called. But, so I'm watching this thousand pound sisters. And it's Tammy and her sister. And it's... Tell. Make us laugh. Okay. So let me see if I can find this. Let's see if this is on Spotify. Hold on one second.

One of the sisters decides that she wants to be a musician. She's always wanted to be a musician. But she doesn't know how to be a musician, right? She has no clue. She's a country bumpkin. Her name is Amy Slayton. She's a country bumpkin from Kentucky. And she's kind of struck gold because they started. following her and her sister around because they were incredibly huge when they met. Now both of them have had the surgeries and they're much thinner than they were when they first started.

But she's still a country bumpkin. No offense, but she's still a real country bumpkin. So we catch up with Amy Slayton in this new season and she's a budding musician, but she has no idea how to be a musician. She doesn't even, she's not how to sing or hold the tune or have a beat, but she has found the magic of Open AI. She's found the magic of artificial intelligence, super intelligence, excuse me. And so she is making music with artificial intelligence. Well, this leads to her going into a studio to try and put her own voice to her song that she didn't even write, that AI wrote, called Pounds Hallow. Pounds Hollow is like a pond near where they live where she has good memories of being a kid.

Were the Wackintree? Where the Wacken Tree? I'm sure of it. Wait until you see Ponds Hollow. Poundtala, it's very interesting. It's literally like a rainwater collection point. You know what I'm saying? In the middle of a park. I did. Yeah.

Some water. Okay. So Poundtall. Let's listen to a little bit of Poundtale. Hold on. Let's listen to a little bit of Poundtale. Grabbed the healing tubes. I got the country red, blue, and the lakes have used.

Between the toes, the fresh water beach with a cell phone. Towers can't quite reach. I'm slipping through the canyon, shadows and light, going to stay by the water to the middle of the night. Man, Madisonville, then we'll take it close

and they're able to call me. But I have to tell you, that that is actually Amy with a lot of auto-tune on her voice. But the original one, imagine AI doing it. So they go to... It's just so funny to me.

So she's trying desperately to sing a note and she can, whatever. But somebody, somebody, somebody gets her introduction to a real live music producer in Nashville, Tennessee. Okay. So they all hop in the, you know, redneck wagon down to Nashville, big city, Nashville, Tennessee. And they meet with this record producer. And this record producer, nicest guy. But he can tell he's kind of like a little bit no bullshit. And so he meets with her.

He says, yeah, so what is? I always wanted to be a musician, and I done made myself some songs. We're using the AI. And he's like, well, I know if you know, but that's kind of frowned upon around here. But, you know, okay, let's listen to it. He listens to it. And he says, there's some catchy moments in there, you know, but that gives me no idea of your own talent, right? And she says, well, you know, I really want to put my own voice on it,

but I done had a lot of breathing problems for the last couple weeks, so I don't know. And he says, well, I'm going to make some phone calls, and I'll see if I can get you into a studio. We can do this. So he makes some phone calls, and he gets her into Starstruck Studio, I guess, where Taylor Swift and all kind of other people have recorded, right? And there's like, now she's in a professional studio with a bunch of people there trying to help her out. And one guy's like, let's go in this other room and we'll do some scales together just to get you warmed up, right? And she's like, well, I think I'm pretty warmed up. I've been vaping the whole way down here.

And he's like And she's like, Faso la to da to da and she's like Fasola la da da da da She gets into this vocal booth Where Taylor Swift and every other Famous Country musician in Nashville has ever been And she's like, can I take it off my shoes? And he's like, yeah, do whatever you got

That makes me self comfortable And she just It's not there But they just slap a bunch of auto tune on there And now I'm like This is like the funniest fucking shit I have ever seen in my entire life. But you know that there is no chance in any frozen hell that this girl would have ever

gotten into a studio like that had it not been for TLC. Yeah, of course, it's the show. But, you know, these little moments bring me joy. These little moments of, like, humanity bring me joy. I probably would not, you would not find me on a Saturday night hanging out with Amy or Tammy Slayton. but I can appreciate their little journey that they're going on. And it's like a little mind-numbing, let's go through.

I'm right there with you. And I just love- Just the housewives. Yeah, I know. That numb my mind and make me laugh. But the problem about the housewives is I would much rather watch the kind of regular folks, so to speak. You know what I'm saying? Because it makes me feel better about my own life.

Those make me feel better about my life. Oh, yeah? They are such obnoxious women. I've tried. I went back to season one of the Atlanta. And it's, hmm, chef's kiss. It is a chef's kiss. I watched it.

I remember. NeNe's season one. Nini Leaks was the best thing that ever happened to that series. Is she still on the show? No, but she did just make her return like a guest appearance on one of them. What does she do now? She's got to have turned out to be making money for herself somehow. Nini seemed pretty smart to me.

Yeah, I mean, she actually was, well, she was on girls. and then she, you know, she went on to do, like, TV shows with Ryan Murphy, and then she was on Broadway, actually. Oh, no shit. Yes, and she was good and got good reviews. Okay. Yeah, no, I mean, she's kind of been around the block. She still lives here in Atlanta. Speaking of AI on auto tune, Jennifer Lopez, I don't know if you've seen Jennifer Lopez on stage lately, but highly auto-tuned.

Very, you know. everybody gets old. Everybody, like, I read this article, or maybe I listened to it on YouTube, I can't remember. They were talking about Katie Perry and how Katie Perry, her last album, was ranked one of the worst albums ever made. God. I don't know that that's true. But this guy, like, he goes through all, like, the top, the bottom worst 100 albums of all time. Really?

Yeah, and hers is, like, number 32 or something. It's pretty bad. Like, I could, I flipped through it on Spotify. It's pretty bad. I don't know if it's the worst album ever made. But he made a point. He said, listen, when you're young and you don't know, but you're in the flow and you're around other people with all this young energy, you hit on something when you become a pop star. You hit on something.

You encapsulate a moment that everyone else is feeling. And if you get it right, you meet the moment. And there it is. However, everybody ages gets older and you're stuck there because now you have a different, you're not with the people anymore. Now you're up here and you're shopping at Chanel and you're taking chartered flights. And the world is different. And the world is passing you by while you're living a completely different life than the one you came out of.

And Katie Perry, the backlash was swift. It was big. She was trying to be, you know, all this girl power shit by showing her tits, which made no fucking sense whatsoever. And then he was also talking about how Taylor Swift is also now getting a lot of backlash about her newest three songs that she puts out. Even my wife, who's like was one of the biggest swifties ever, has turned her back on Taylor Swift. Really? Yeah. A lot of people have.

Because Taylor's just out of touch, in her opinion, in a lot of people's opinion, Taylor's out of touch. she has become everything that no one wanted her to be, which is an elitist erudite billionaire who doesn't give a shit about anybody except for herself. And she continues to sing about the four fucking breakups that she's had in her life in the same fucking way with way too many words. She's very wordy. My opinion, Taylor's way too wordy. But anyway, J. Lo is also seeing, J-Lo hasn't put out new music in a long time, but I don't think. But she's also kind of experiencing some of this backlash too.

She just had to cancel a bunch of shows because they weren't selling tickets. And the couple that she did do were just weird. She's like weirdly shaking her ass and singing in a high auto tune and making all kind of weird facial moments. But I remember J-Lo's moment when it was like 2008, 9, 10, 11. Oh, yeah, Jenny from the block. Jenny from the block. And if you remember the VMAs in 2011,

there was a very famous moment that happened between her and Pitbull. Pitbull was up there singing. JLo came on and they were doing their thing together. And J.Lo started backing her ass up into Pitbull's crotch. And Pitbull got a visible half hard on the VMAs. And it's a picture that I've seen it a million times on the Internet. It's clear that he's hard. Like, it's clear. Yeah.

But no one ever said anything about it. JLo never said anything about it. Pitpole never said anything about it. Mr. Worldwide, Big Pants, just had a chubby. That was it. Until yesterday, when he went on a podcast and he admitted that he did in fact get a boner when J-Lo was backing up into him. I got to be honest. I've been on stage. I've fallen off stage. And then I got back up on stage. I've been in crowded rooms, and I say room, not theater. I've been in crowded rooms and I've been in less crowded rooms. And I got to be honest with you. I don't see under any circumstances how I would have been able to get half hard up on stage in front of people.

But he's Mr. Worldwide. He's Mr. Worldwide. He gets up like that. Yeah, he just gets it like that. I guess when you got all that tail, you got to be prepared in any moment, right? He's, wow. And I can appreciate the honesty. Here's a guy that I don't like Pitbull.

This is not my guy. He's like, not my thing. But I can appreciate the Pitbull's been around for like four. 40 years or something. He's been around for a while. People just continue to fucking sell him out. I follow his drummer on, his tour drummer on Instagram. And he does like, you know, he's got the camera behind him.

And you can hear the click track that's playing and then, you know, how they do this. Like, what I didn't realize until very recently, not about Pipple, but about a lot of touring musicians. I'm sure this is true of Taylor Swift and Jonas Brothers, all these people who have these, like, hired guns behind them that are just like, incredible musicians is that not only do they have a click track but there is like a a music director that's talking in their ear like okay here comes the chorus five four really go yeah here comes the you know let's go again to the rhythm one two you never had that in your musical experience i click track click track we had a drunk producer in the hallway of of the studio,

spend four days setting up all of his equipment to realize there was no sound booth for my vocals. So we made that in a bathroom. I was literally sitting on the shitter singing. Well, the bathroom does have good vocals. It does. It does. You put some blankets in there. I was like hanging blankets.

And like when sometimes people would have to pee and we have to take a break. It's weird. It's just weird. and my band made me not talk for seven days while we were recording. To save your voice. Yes. It was fucking weird. It was weird.

I couldn't smoke and I couldn't talk. Oh. And I remember I was singing those songs, Chopper Johnson songs. I remember coming out and this producer who had worked with some people, right? He had not like, he wasn't like work with sound garden or anything, but he had worked with some people. You know, like, I don't know, collective soul or soul. Oh, shit. Right.

And I come out and he's like, yeah, he's like, we kept doing this one take on this song that was called dapper dialogue. And so he kept doing this chorus over and over and over again. He was layering it. And I was trying to like get this note. And we went on for an hour with this whole thing. And I come out and I'm like, okay, I got to take a break. You know, I come out. And he goes, so what exactly are you saying there?

And I'm like, you've been listening for. an hour and you don't know what I'm saying. I go, dapper dialogue. And he goes, oh. Well, you're using big words. That's what he said to me. You're using big words. I should have known then.

And then to have our dreams crushed by Rush's manager. This is bad, guys. This is pretty fucking bad. It's terrible. I don't know who would buy this. I wouldn't. Well, sometimes you need straight. If you totally take away all of it and start again, maybe there's something there.

Maybe a new singer. Stop using the words dapper dialogue. You take away everything. You take away everything. Maybe there's something there. I've heard a lot of songs in my time. And these are definitely some of them. Just letting you know.

Oh, man. I'll tell you what. It's, you know, hey, listen. As my coffee boyfriend says, as my coffee boyfriend likes to say, hey, listen, Brian, one of these days I got to get you on the microphone. Because every time I talk to Lancers, like something new I bring up about my life, like, oh, I worked in commercial real estate. Oh, I did this. I lived in Chicago. Yes, you were in France.

Oh, I lived. And he said, what haven't you done? Like, every time I talk to you, there's a new thing. It's the truth. Is it, though? It's subjective. It's subjective. It's all subjective.

All right. Well, listen, there's only so much fun we can have in one day. I've got to get going. But if you're good, maybe we'll be back. What time is it? No, we're not. We'll be back. We'll be back tomorrow.

We'll be back tomorrow. Tomorrow? Are we back tomorrow? No, we're not. Oh, we're not? Okay, well, fuck you then. Fine. Whatever.

I don't care anyway. All right. We'll try and turn around a quick one. Stay soon. Um, I wanted to say something on the back of, oh, Caratop came back. Did you see that? Caratop came back to his Vegas residency. He did.

He did. Wow. Two weeks after he tried to commit suicide on the side of his pool. Jeez. Yeah. Really weird. What is his act? He still does a fucking comedy act with a big bucket where he pulls shit out.

I don't know. And best to you, my brother. Thanks, Jesse. Yeah, you know, I don't know. He addressed it, but he didn't address directly what was going on, but he was like kind of like you could tell he was emotional, but he was like, you know. Is he still really jacked? He is. He's been jacked for a long time. And maybe that's part of his problem is when we take all those steroids. No one gets jacked like that and it's just on their own. No one. I don't care who you are. You just don't get jacked like that without help. not when you're 62 years old. Yeah. I mean, maybe when you're 22 years old, if you really stick to a, like, a protein diet and you're blah, blah, blah, blah.

Maybe you can get some kind of physique, but I don't know that you can get that kind of physique just on your own. I just don't, but I don't know. I have a lot of suspicions about a lot of these guys who are like, you know, my age and Jack like that. I've tried. Look at me. It looks weird. Yeah, look at me. This is how you should look at my age.

Skinny and knocking on death store. Skinny and tired. That's how you should look. Skinny and tired. Not jacked and full of energy. I mean, you're doing it wrong. If you really want to live a natural lifestyle, you know, deprive yourself of sleep. Get up every five minutes to pee at night and drive yourself crazy with anxiety.

That's real life. Okay. TCBpodcast.com if it's still up. Yeah, Ph.P. All right, Chrissy. I guess that's all I can do for right this very second. I think so. And I'll tell you, I love you.

And I love you. Best to you. Best to you. Best to you out there on the podcast and streaming audience. Until next time, Chrissy and I will say. We do say and we must say goodbye.