The Commercial Break - PossumLoverBG
Episode Date: July 18, 2024It’s a Story Time With Bryan kind of day here at TCB, featuring dank weed, Corey Feldman, and a baby possum. Gravely voices Botulism Veneers are scary A three hour massage Stinky weed Corey Fe...ldman has a new song Is Corey trolling us or are we trolling him? Don't get litigious with Bryan Bryan would see Corey live The Hooch (Chattahoochee River) Don’t slander shoot the hooch it's our culture The Nature Center A pitcher plant A BABY POSSUM Bryan gets got by the possums! LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us 212.433.3TCB text or leave us a voicemail Watch TCB on YouTube Instagram: @thecommercialbreak Creator: Bryan Green Co-Host: Bryan Green Co-Host: Krissy Hoadley Producer: Christina A. Producer: Gustavo B. Download & Listen on the Audacy app To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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I'm a very romantic person. I love to be in love when I can and I sincerely believe in the hope there's someone out there for everybody.
The more I date, the more I realize that my person died at birth or something, I don't know.
On this episode of the Commercial Break.
of the commercial break.
They found you.
I got taken by the possum.
I really did, I got taken by the possum.
I took a bunch of pictures.
I was like, ah, god damn it.
I still don't like the old possums,
but I'll give it to you.
These little possums are cute.
If they're little and they have been bathed
by the people at the Genoichi Nature Center,
then they're kind of cute.
And they're feeding them like carrots and not my daughter's dirty diaper, then, you know,
then they're kind of cute.
I will give it that.
The next episode of The Commercial Break starts now.
Go dirty in the morning!
Oh, yeah, Captain Kiddens,
welcome back to the commercial break.
I'm Brian Green.
This is the Throat Lodge into my T. Chris, enjoy.
Hold it.
Best to you, Chris.
Best to you, Brian.
And best to you out there in the podcast universe.
Oh, you sound much better now.
I do.
Yes.
Why didn't you do that before?
Forgot I had those.
Shh, shh, shh, shh.
Shit.
Man, we could have gone through a whole episode without you having that gravelly voice, but I like it. Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, sh And I go, yeah, I can see that, you know? She's always crying. Maybe that's it.
And she goes, oh, I hope so.
And I'm like, well, jeez.
I wish that upon.
Because sometimes it sounds like you're straining.
Like, Miley, Miley sounds like sometimes it sounds like
she's straining to talk, right?
You see all those muscles in her throat.
But she's also a singer, so that's part of the allure.
It is.
Yes, take care of your voice.
OK, so for the rest of the episode,
Chrissy will not be heard.
Just to let everybody know.
I've got a little cough.
She's got a little cough, a little cold.
She's brought coronavirus into the house.
It's norovirus, we're all gonna die.
She has anthrax.
Before we get to this, speaking of anthrax,
did you- Speaking of anthrax. speaking of anthrax, did you...
Speaking of anthrax.
Speaking of anthrax, do you hear about all these, like the hospitals are seeing record
numbers of Botox patients with actual like botulism going on?
Like they're, you know, paralysis and heart problems.
Well, I read about something a little while back
where there was fake Botox going around.
A lot of it, apparently, because this is a nationwide,
really probably a worldwide problem,
but it's a nationwide problem right now,
and hospitals are sounding the alarm
because they're seeing a 7,000% increase
in patients who are coming in with some blindness,
some kind of parallelism going on in their face
or their arms or their legs, heart problems,
infections, all kinds of stuff.
Yeah, it's dangerous.
Yeah, there's apparently a really bad batch
of botulism going around when you do that Botox.
And they're going to these Botox parties
where they have the quote unquote Botox doctor
who's not even certified in shit. They go to a two two day class. It's like that class we were talking about where someone
was taking a class to do dental work, like complicated dental work, like putting in veneers,
right? They were veneer technician. When you get veneers in case anybody, before you get veneers,
before you think about going, do your homework, before you think about going to a veneer technician
or any veneer doctor of any sort or any brand, I highly recommend that you think about an oral
surgeon or someone that has gone to school for more than two days to do this. You do your homework
online and you take a look at the very
insane reality of getting veneers which includes shaving your real teeth down to nubs And if you want a scary thing to look at look at someone who is about to get veneers
That has had their teeth shaved down. It is insane. Listen, my son is
Currently getting veneers on his teeth right now. That's why you can hear him
But that is insane. No one who has not been to medical school should be doing that procedure son is currently getting veneers on his teeth right now. That's why you can hear him. But
that is insane. No one who has not been to medical school should be doing that procedure
at all. So many complications can happen. And just the fact that you have to shave your
teeth down is like, you don't want somebody fucking that shit up. You're going to get
veneers, do it right. Because then look at the people who went to the veneer technician
to get veneers. It literally looks like they have white cardboard in their
eyes. It is illegal. And this all started right here in our beautiful, lovely hometown of Atlanta,
Georgia. There's like a guy who became infamous on the internet for, you know, come to my four-day
veneer class and you'll be a veneer technician. And then there's other people who went to that class and like now are set up in the back of someone's home.
With like, you know.
No, don't go, don't do that.
Yeah, no, no, no, no, no.
So Botox, probably the same thing.
You probably want to go to a dermatologist,
board certified, because you have to know how to do that,
where to put it, and you have to get it from a legit source.
You can't just be-
It can be willy nilly putting poison in your face.
No.
Oh, God.
You can't get like, you know, discount Botox from Nambidia or wherever, whatever country
in the world is selling this shit, and then expect that everything's going to turn out
fine to save yourself 20 bucks.
I mean, that's just ridiculous.
If you're going to get Botox, and I realize a lot of people
get Botox, I'm not against it. God bless you. Go do it. See how it works out. But just go to a
dermatologist. That's all I'm saying. It's not about the Botox. It's about getting the Botox from
the actual Botox company who sells Botox. And there are cheaper alternatives to Botox too. You
don't have to get Juvederm and some other brands or something like that. Anyway, you can get, isn't like Juvederm and some other brands or something like that? I think so. Anyway, you can get like, there's discount Botox
that goes through the doctor.
They buy it from a medical facility
and not fucking Aunt Jean's Botox soup kitchen.
Yeah, fuck man, fuck.
Speaking of home remedies and taking care of yourself.
So, I don't know when it was, a couple weeks ago, I went to
my dad's house and, you know, he's got that lake with that, you know, where I caught my
own version of botulism.
You did.
Yeah, I know. I was so sick. I'm still not feeling 100%. I'm still like, I'm eating carefully
because I found out the hard way that, you know, my tummy's not ready for it. Anyway,
so the trip before that, I had gone a couple of weeks previous to that, to my dad's house,
and he's got the lake and he's got the dock and he's got a cove so you can jump out into
the water safely and all this other stuff. And the kids and I were playing and they were
having a lot of fun watching me jump off things. Like, dad, jump over me. Oh, dad, jump into the inner tube.
Oh, dad, throw me off the dock.
And then I have this one trick
that I know how to do in the pool,
which is I can do a back dive.
So I can turn myself backwards
and I can flip over into the water and land like a dive.
So it's like a dive with a twist, so to speak.
Right?
That's a little specialty that you got there.
I don't think I've seen that move.
Well, I'll show it to you 20 years ago, if we ever get that time machine going.
Because I think having like, look back on it now, piecing it together, I think that
very trick, which I was so pleased that I could still do, that my old bones would actually
allow that to happen, That very trick may have landed
me with a very serious case of sciatica, like I herniated my disc again, or I bulged it,
or whatever you want to call it.
Nicole Soule-Northman Oh, God.
Jared Saskar And so I started feeling this new pain on a new
side. Like, I've been dealing with back issues since I worked at the restaurant industry.
You know, you carry heavy things, you stand on your feet all day, you're walking.
Nicole Soule-Northman Staying up for three days.
Jared Saskar Staying up for three days, that's right. No sitting allowed, you just like pace the house back and forth.
But you know, and then you have the kids and you cock your hip to one side, you know, hold them
and they get bigger, they don't care, they still want to be on your hip.
That's true.
Yeah, just listen to them right now.
What is going on out there? It's like a zoo.
It's like a zoo.
Hey kids, daddy's trying to work.
Thanks.
P.S. thanks.
So I got like this really bad case of sciatica.
I believe I hernia.
I went to the doctor, you know, I told you I was on steroids.
It gave me a roid rage.
I was all out of control.
And I do remember the roid rage.
Oh my God, Chrissy. One day I was just out of control.
I was yelling at everything.
I was out of control.
And I knew that this was coming,
because every time I take Starways, it comes.
That ugly, weird, testosterone-driven Roydridge.
Hormones are a real thing.
They're a real thing.
They really do make you feel differently.
They do.
And I think the older I get,
the more sensitive I am to all medications,
but especially medications that like affect your brain system. I mean, just like, you know,
steroids, painkillers, you know, Xanax or whatever.
I don't know.
At least you don't get that steady flow of hormones every single month.
I do. Her name is Astrid.
And Chrissy. And Chrissy. I got two and I'll soon have five.
Beth Dombkowski Yes, yes.
Jared Sussman I've also got Blue. I think she's giving more testosterone than anything,
but whatever, you get the point. So, I go and I decide I'm going to get a mahas. I'm going to
go get a mahaj, or Astrid wakes up one day and she says, you have got to go to the massage place.
You got to go to the, whatever they call that.
The masseuse.
The masseuse.
The massage parlor.
Yeah, the massage parlor.
The day spa.
The day spa, the spa.
That's what I was looking for.
So go to the massage parlor, get yourself, go to the spa, get yourself a massage.
But you need a little rub down. A little rub up, a little rub down.
You need a real massage though.
That's what she's telling me.
She's had enough.
Everyone's had enough of Brian being miserable.
Understandably, right?
I know when Esther does stuff like this, it's like, Brian, cool your jets, rev down.
Okay?
You're a little being a real bear right now.
It's like when I was sick,
and she's like, go to the doctor and do it now.
I'm taking the children,
I'm giving you the keys to the car, go to the,
or I'll drive you there and drop you off.
One of the two.
So she sets me up with not a one hour, not a two hour,
but almost a three hour massage,
like a two and a half hour massage, right?
The longest kind
of massage that they have, great.
You're out of the house.
I'm out of the house.
Get rubbed down.
No one can find me. My phone is off in a locker somewhere. I can't be bothered. I just, you
know, when first she said it, I'm like, we, and that's, this is so frivolous. We don't
need to spend all that money because they're expensive.
They are.
Two and a half hour massage is not cheap at the place that we go to. And so, but I also understood that I really did need some relief.
I wasn't feeling well. And I go, I go like three hours early, right? I'm like, oh, they told me
to, the thing is at like six o'clock, I leave the house at like four. I'm like, oh, they told me to
be there two hours early. You have to be there an hour for every hour you get early. So I go and, you know, I'm in the room and you go in the locker
and you change and then you go into the waiting room and the waiting room is lovely and cucumber
water and that whole nine yards and they don't allow phones in there. So here you are in a robe
with your, you know, meats and potatoes hanging out, depending on what level of undress you want to get, and mainly women in the room, but I don't give two shits. I'm like, what a,
I've been to enough spas to know that I don't give two shits. And of course there's men in there
also, but just mainly women sitting around a fire. It's 370 degrees outside in Atlanta,
but there's a fire going and somehow you need it. Somehow that's great, you're like, and I'm just like profusely sweating, but whatever. I'm in this heavy robe with sandals and, and so the masseuse comes, opens the door
to the room and says, Brian? And I'm like, I think I told you this story. Yeah, she had, she said my
name wrong. Did I tell you that? She goes in and she says, Ryan? Ryan? Ryan? And I don't think,
I mean, I think about it for a second, but I don't,
it's also a room full of people and everyone's quiet. I don't get, Brian!
I'm like halfway across the room. So I just let her go. And then she comes back in, in a couple
minutes and she goes, it's Ryan with a B, but Ryan. And I was like, oh, that's me. Ryan with a B.
What? Okay. All right. Got it. 10-4. Christy It's just start spelling your name like that
when you tell people.
Jared Oh my God, Christy. So-
Christy Ryan with a B.
Jared It's Ryan with a B. So it's Brian. Actually, that's not bad. Ryan with a B. I'm going to put
that on my email signature. Ryan with a B. So I go, so, you know, she introduces herself,
very pleasant lady. How do I say this politely without offending? Big boned, big lady, you know, she introduces herself, very pleasant lady.
I always say this politely without offending, big boned, big lady, you know, big lady, probably a little bit shorter than him.
Good, she's got the muscle though.
Exactly. No, I'm not afraid. I don't care what you look like. As long as you're good
with your hands, I don't give a shit what you look like, because I won't see you. I'm
going to have my head buried in a, I'm going to be staring at the floor for the next three hours.
So they literally, I mean, this place is huge
and she literally, we turn like seven different corners
and I am in the way, way, way, way, way, way back.
I never been to this part of the building before.
Way in the back, she opens the door, it's huge.
It's got a bathtub in it.
It had a bathtub, like a standalone bathtub
with the gold feet and the whole nine yards.
And I thought, oh, is this the room where it all goes down? This is like the special room, three hour massage is
like a code word for, you know, happy ending. It actually made me nervous there for a second. So,
I said, what's the bath for? And she goes, oh, we have a service where you take a bath and,
you know, we put Epsom salts and we do your thing and do, I was like, do my thing, what's that?
So, she says, hey, like any good masseuse would, hey, any particular reason why you're here today,
right? I see you've got the two and a half hour long massage, do you know any particular reason
why you're here? I said, yeah, actually, I've been having this really bad lower back pain,
it's in my glutes, it's in my butt, it's in my thigh, it's down in my leg, you know,
it's really running down the right side of my body and it's making me miserable.
And I've tried everything.
I've stretched it, I've yoga, I've walked, running, nothing's seeming to help, you know,
not Advil, steroids, nothing.
And she says, oh, I am actually a certified OT.
Like I'm a certified OT and sports medicine specialist, as well
as a masseuse.
Hostie- Occupational therapist?
Is that what that is?
OT?
David- Yeah, PT.
I'm sorry, PT, physical therapist.
I'm a PT, sports medicine specialist, blah, blah, blah.
Hostie- Perfect.
David- And she goes, so when people come in here like athletes and stuff, I'm one of the
people that they call to work it out.
And I was like, okay, this sounds fantastic.
Hostie- And then good hands. David- And she goes, for an extra 50 bucks. And I'm like, oh, here we go. The big sales
pitch, you know, for an extra 50 bucks, we'll put some fake CBD oil on your ass and rub it in,
pretending that it does anything. And I'm like, she goes, you know, for an extra 30 bucks or
whatever it is, I will, I'll do some PT on like, I'll do some massaging of your IT band, we'll get in there, we'll do some
stretching." She goes, I think I can really help you with this. It seems like it should have been
included, but whatever. I know, for like $16,000, you think you would get the $30 stretch too. You
can't stretch me a little bit while we're back there. But okay, whatever, it's a business,
I understand. They're going to get, it's like, you know, a spa is like Disney World. They're going to add everything on. Okay. I said,
well, listen, why don't we just like get started and then, you know, if I think that, if, if
I think that's needed, then, then we'll go there. Well, instantaneous, she's like, okay,
I want you to lay down. Usually I'd start face up, but I just want you to lay down and we're going to get there. And I was like, okay, sounds good. And so she starts off by like,
instantaneously working that leg, right? And she's like working the leg and she's moving it in
different and weird ways than a masseuse would. It's not like a regular massage.
And she starts putting her fingers on pressure points, and then she's like
moving her way up my leg, like toward my glutes. And she's like, can I just grab your underwear and
pull it down? And she's like, so I can really get into the glutes.
Jared Larsen Oh, you want underwear?
Jared Larsen I do go underwear.
Jared Larsen Okay.
Jared Larsen And this is what I told her, because it was a little chatty at first, right? And she
told me too, she's like, when I'm working stretching you out and stuff, I'm going to be a little chatty
just because I need you to, I need you to help me out with some of these stretches. And she told me too, she's like, when I'm working, stretching you out and stuff, I'm gonna be a little chatty, just cause I need you to help me out
with some of these stretches.
And she goes, but then I'll let settle down
to let you relax for the last half.
And I said, okay, that's fair.
And I said, yeah, you know what, whatever,
whatever you think is gonna help.
Yeah, whatever you think, yeah, you're the expert.
I said, nine times out of 10, I go with underwear
because I want somebody on the other side
to feel a level of comfort.
I don't wanna be that creepy guy
who shows up with balls.
Yeah, I can understand that.
I go nude, but I think that's different.
Yeah, I think that's different.
And here's what she says.
She goes, I think most guys assume
that we would prefer to have your underwear on,
but the truth is, if we're gonna do work like this,
it gets in the way,
and we don't want to get oil all over your clothes.
And she goes, it just kind of becomes messy and weird. And she said, also, we've seen it all. I mean and we don't want to get like oil all over your clothes. And, and she was just kind of becomes messy and weird.
And she said, also we've seen it all.
I mean, you know, we see it all.
She's like, I see guys and she was telling me a story.
She's like, I see it as it was a guy in here about a month and a half ago.
And he, he had a flight.
He was like in his seventies and he had a flag flying in the room and he had no
underwear and she was like, he was showing everybody,
I don't think on purpose, but he was like showing everybody.
Yeah, to the point where we had to call him in,
like he was here half an hour early,
we actually got the masseuse,
we got another masseuse to like call him in
so that we could get him out of the waiting room.
I was like, whoa.
He had it in the waiting room.
He had it in the waiting room. He had it in the waiting room.
Oh, wow.
And then she said, you know, I ended up being-
He was really ready.
Yes.
And she goes, in the weirdest of circumstances,
which never happens, he was my client,
so I had to go in there 15 minutes into the massage.
And she goes, and that flag was flying the entire time.
And she's like, and listen, okay, what are you gonna do?
She's like, he wasn't like creepy.
He just maybe took his Viagra. things were happening. I don't know, you know, he took
Cialis and there he was. And I was like, oh, wow. And she's like, we have seen it all. Don't worry
about it, right? And I was like, okay, well, you're not worried about it. I'm not worried
about it. I am telling you what, Chrissy, this lady, she was doing magic. She was like pulling
my leg to the left, pushing it to the right, putting her knee into my, into my glute. She was doing this stretch where
she like pulled my leg up, put her elbow in my glute, yanked it up, and she was doing
all kinds of stuff that at the moment may not have been the most comfortable thing in
the world, but man, did it fix my fucking back. Like the next day I felt like a million
bucks.
But here's the point to the story.
The point to the story is this.
Remember how we talk about Atlanta
is like the weed smell capital of the world?
Like everywhere in Atlanta.
It just smells like weed everywhere.
It just smells like weed.
You go be 90 miles per hour down 75.
Yes.
And you crack your,
it's not like you don't even crack your window.
It's like all of a sudden your car smells like weed.
Yeah, you're like, who's in the car is smoking weed.
It's no one. It's just, that's just the way it smells in Atlanta, I guess. Someone in
Atlanta is just burning a lot of weed all the time. Well, when I got there and I walked
into the waiting room, there was a guy, and you could tell
this was the kind of guy who would be smoking weed, and the entire room smelled so strongly
of fucking diggity-dank.
It was dank, dank, dank, dank, dank.
I don't know.
Like, he had bathed-
It just permeated him.
Yes.
He had bathed in dabs.
You know what I'm saying? Yeah? He had literally dabbed himself,
his whole body. Like, it was like it was a perfume.
He wouldn't get really relaxed with a massage.
Oh my God, Kirstie. And I don't know why, but I found it irritating. I was like, I came here
to smell good candles, not to smell your stankyass weed. The least you could do is shower up before
you get in here. You know, they have seven showers in there. There's a reason for it.
Go in there. But the other part is, is that when I got, the smell permeated the entire
place. It was obviously coming from this one man. He was ground zero for the smell, but
it permeated the entire place. The entire place smelled like weed. And when I got in there, so here she is,
like stretching me out, you know,
handing my glutes and all this other stuff,
and I can still smell the weed.
Even after she's rubbed that damn oil all over my body,
you know, the eucalyptus shit,
I can still smell the weed while I'm having my,
like I'm face down.
So I'm like, do you smell weed?
And she goes, no.
She goes, well, I don't know.
Did you smoke some?
I go, no.
I just, I think there was someone in the waiting room.
I think he might've got a little over puffed
before he came in and, you know,
just smells like weed to me.
And then she's like, I don't know.
I'm so used to all these smells around here.
She's like, I'm kind of like sensitive to it.
And so I was like, I smelled it throughout the entire building. I swear I can smell in here. She's like, I'm kind of like sensitive to it. And so I was like,
I smelled it throughout the entire building. I swear I can smell in here. So I can hear her.
She goes, well, hold on one second. I can hear her as she goes and cracks the door and she can
hear her go, she's like, oh yeah, yeah, wow. And she goes, do you think I was one guy? And I go,
it was one guy, one dude, fucking rolling a J before he walks in the door. One guy, one dude, fucking rolling a J before he walks in the door.
One guy hotboxing it out in the parking lot.
I've told you, I've smelled the same thing.
Like when we have drivers that deliver food or whatever,
I'll open the door and I'm like, whoa.
Yeah, and then your whole house smells like weed.
We had a kid's birthday party here over the weekend.
Kid's birthday party out by the pool.
Which by the way is a stressful event. I highly, I mean, if you're going to do it, hire a lifeguard. That's
what we did. And it just, it de-stressed, but not all the way de-stressed, just mostly de-stressed.
But there was one person who visited who I think probably had, you know, smoke and not the like
usual suspects. Like there are people that I know. This was someone I wasn't too familiar with,
walked in and he just like, and he also had children
with him and I was like, damn dude, really?
You're token in the car?
What is this?
Dazed and confused?
What are you doing?
But then like the whole pool area, I could smell it.
I was like, damn dude, really?
900 degrees outside, hot dogs cooking on the grill, kids farting and shitting all over the place, dirty diapers. I don't
know, the whole thing just had my grass cut. You know, there are so many things that could
cover up the smell, but no, the weed always permeates. It's the worst offender of off-flector-y offenses.
It just is.
I don't know why.
Every time I watch that Bill Maher podcast, I think, man, this whole neighborhood must
smell because Bill's downstairs just toking it up the entire time, which is crazy to me.
I don't know why.
Why?
Why is weed the one that cuts through everything?
It is very distinctive.
Oh, Chrissy, it drives me crazy.
I think we might just be so used to not really smelling it like we do now, too,
then you can really...
True.
It kind of hits you different.
True.
You're like, that is weed.
Yeah. I mean, when you go to LA or Colorado or one of the many millions of places now,
it's decriminalized or all out of the world.
It doesn't smell like this.
It doesn't smell like weed.
It does not.
I went to Vegas and I went inside a weed shop
where I had to go like through three airlocks
and it did not smell like weed.
Even when the guy was showing us the weed,
it just didn't smell like weed.
I know.
But, you know, go to Atlanta, go to a massage, go to a spa, the nicest spa in town.
One asshole takes one hit off his pong before he walks in and the whole place smells like
weed for the next three days.
I'm not sure which is worse, the kids puking in the car or that weed smell, because neither
of them get out of there very, unbelievable.
I think I take the weed smell. Oh, of them get out of there very easily. Unbelievable.
I think I'd take the weed smell.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, all day long.
I'm not, listen, on some occasions,
weed smells, I know what weed smells like.
I've been smoked, you know, smoked it for a long time.
Smoked it at a young age.
I know what really bad weed smells like.
I know what really good weed smells like.
Maybe it's just I grew up in a time
when weed was not really weed.
It was just like literally a weed
that you would dry and smoke.
And it didn't really smell like anything because there was no potency to it whatsoever.
Now everything's very potent.
Now everything's super potent. It's all that diggity dang. Look at the crystals falling off.
Shake the crystals.
The crystals.
Shake them off.
Save the crystals in the bag.
Yeah, save them in the bag.
Oh, dude, you dropped the crystals.
Remember that.
Oh, now we're crack addicts?
Now we gotta get on the floor and look for the crystals?
I remember the crystals from the bag for the baggie.
Oh my god, yes.
Such a, so annoying.
I have some friends that are those friends.
Save the crystals!
If you got any empty bags, give them to me, I'll save the crystals.
Oh really?
What are you gonna do with them?
I'm gonna make dabs. You're gonna make dabs? Okay, God bless you. I remember
that one of my friends, he bought like a little thing of the crystals.
Jared Sagen Oh, yeah.
Jared Sagen Yeah. Well, you know, and he would like sprinkle it on top. And this is when I was
nowhere near weed smoking. I was like, I'm done. Like this shit just makes me paranoid and sick to my stomach.
And he was just like, sprinkle them on top of joints, sprinkle them on the bowl,
sprinkle them on bong hits.
And I was like, how do you function?
Some people are different.
I know they're built different.
Yeah, it is.
Conjunction, junction.
What's your function?
It is.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, some people like it strong and every day, multiple times a day.
And they do, they function.
But I can't do it.
Not me.
I'm too paranoid to eat.
I'm hungry, but I'm too paranoid to let anyone come to my front door to deliver it.
I'm no good.
I don't like watching TV because it makes me, I'm afraid I'm going to see something
that's going to paranoia me like a guy in jail and be like I'm gonna go to jail!
Okay let's take a break and we'll talk more about stinky stinky Atlanta when we get back. Dink, dank. Dink, dank, ATL.
What's up haters? Now let's get down to business. If you've got something to say, say it to our faces. And by that I mean, text us or call us at 212-433-3TCB. That's 212-433-3822.
You can and should also find us on Instagram at The Commercial Break and on TikTok at
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And if you're just desperate to see our shining faces
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As always, don't forget that you can find everything
you could possibly need to find on our beautiful website,
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Get your laugh on with me, Chris Jericho,
and the Talk is Jericho podcast.
We've got Guns N' Roses Hall of Famer Duff McKagan
and his joke of the week every Friday,
plus regular visits from the hilarious Brad Williams
and special appearances by everyone
from Gabriel, Fluffy Iglesias, Mark Maron, Dennis Miller, Cheech Maron, Kevin Nealon.
If they're funny, they're on Talk is Jericho.
So listen to and follow Talk is Jericho now on the free Odyssey app or wherever you get
your podcasts.
Speaking of Smokey, did you, Corey Feldman has a new song.
Really?
Oh, yeah.
Would you like to hear it?
I know you would.
I don't know.
I don't know what to think of Corey.
Let's talk about Corey for a minute.
We did a Corey Feldman breakdown video one time.
This is like years ago.
And we did like a retrospective.
I kind of took you through his life. It is like years ago. And we did like a retrospective.
I kind of took you through his life. It was like a two-parter, right? Okay. Maybe it wasn't the most
well-planned thing in the world. And I did bust on Corey pretty hard because he was like begging
for money to make his 12th studio album, which millions of people really wanted, but the record
companies were holding him down. And people in Hollywood wanted to see him fail and all this other stuff. Maybe, maybe Cory, maybe, I don't know. He is selling out lots and lots of shows at
very small venues, but lots and lots of shows. But I think the jokes on him, and I'm not
always sure he's in on the joke, actually, I don't think he's in on the joke, but it's
hard to tell sometimes. Is Cory the biggest troll that has ever lived? And is he trolling us all with really bad music and selling out shows and making a living?
But he knows it. You know what I'm saying? Like, I know this is the gig. This is my lot in life. I am going to be that guy that everyone laughs at.
Because it seems like every live appearance that you watch Cory, just go, like, go to YouTube and do Cory Feldman live.
like, go to YouTube and do Corey Feldman live. And you're going to see, everyone records his shows, because inevitably something happens at a Corey show and it turns into a total shit show.
Like the time he was at Lollapalooza on like a side stage and everyone, the bassist was trying
to get him to say, you know, he's the king, the comeback king, he's the king, the comeback king,
here come the king, the king, comeback
king. He was trying to get the crowd to do it, but no one was doing it. This went on
for like five minutes, he, this bassist was singing acapella, he's the king, the comeback
king, here come the king, the comeback king.
And nobody was doing it in the audience.
No one, not a person was singing it. And then Corey comes out, trips over a wire, then starts yelling at the sound guy, and then tells him to start over. He lost a tooth one time on stage. He stopped the show to look
for his tooth. Everybody look for my tooth. Come on. Really? Really? He yells at drummers. He starts
songs over all the time. His show, his live show includes, you know, whatever people
are in his band, I'm assuming they set up their own gear. And then an inflatable screen,
you know, the kind you see at like a local park when they're going to do, you know, movies
in the park for the kids, but it's like eight foot by eight foot. It's not very impressive.
And he's playing like his intro video is like seven and a half minutes long. And it's, you know,
it's got operatic music and it's got Cory, you know, in the movies and then, you know,
they said he was down, but now he's back.
What?
Cory Feldman has been counted out so many times, every time he lands on top, he's the
comeback. But, God.
But then it goes on and on and on and on
and on and on and on until he finally shows up on stage.
Something gets wrecked.
So I'm not, you know, this all started.
No one would have given a shit about Corey and his music
or whether or not it was good or bad
until he did that Good Morning America
or NBC Today or whatever it was.
When he had the angels and he was like doing that weird
like hand movements.
It was bad.
It was terrible.
But it really goes back way further than that.
Even when he was popular as a movie star,
he showed up at the Howard Stern birthday show one time.
I know everybody has seen the reel on Instagram
of Corey singing and dancing like Michael Jackson.
It was like a small person in the corner with
coconuts on his head, like doing this dance. And then Howard Stern is dressed up like a,
I don't know what he's dressed up like. He's got a bald cap, his ass is hanging out. I mean,
it's been a joke since day one. Is it real or is it not real? Is the question, Chrissy,
that's the question I have for you and for everybody else. Anybody has any insight on this?
I'd love that. I'd love if someone from the tour would just explain whether or not
Cory is actually doing a bit. Are we all getting laughed at by him or are we all laughing at him?
Either way, you got to applaud the guy for continuing to get out there and do it.
Yeah. I mean, I think it's people are going to see him for a novelty.
Yes.
And I think he just for a novelty. Yes.
And I think he just is a novelty.
I think he's maybe trying to be serious, but.
It's not working out.
But what he's doing is, is working.
And so he just keeps doing the same.
Yeah. I mean, if you find a formula that works,
stick with it.
Why would you do anything different
if you're selling out the shows you're booking?
Exactly, keep doing that.
Yeah, and I will share this, and this is true.
When Chrissy and I started to make,
we had started to have internal dialogue
about having guests, okay, maybe now's the time,
let's have guests, and we had our agency start reaching out.
We had just done the Corey retrospective,
that's what you call it.
I'm not fucking A&E, I don't know.
I'm not VH1 storyteller.
But we-
Where are they now?
Where are they now?
We were putting that, when I was putting that together,
I said, wouldn't it be great to cap this all off
with a Corey interview?
So I said, why don't you reach out?
I was also trying to think about anybody
who would come on the show, who might actually agree to come on the commercial break. And so I said,
reach out to Corey and they did. And he responded, how much do they pay?
Right. Right. It's all about money.
Yeah. And so our agency smartly said to me, I wouldn't do this, but he's asking how much
you would pay. And I said, how about we put them
in front of our tens of tens of listeners and maybe they show up at a show or buy an album,
and then that would be good compensation for coming on the show. They responded, and then there was
like, no, you have to pay us this much money. And that dollar amount was not impressive, but I refused
to do it. I'm like, I'm not paying guests. I'm just not doing it. It's a bad precedent to set. And I don't care
that much that I'm going to be willing to depart with $10.
Right. No, we don't need to do that.
So let's all marvel at Cory's brand new song, The Truth. I guess, oh, The Joke. Excuse me. It's
called The Joke. Are you ready? Oh, well, I mean, oh, the joke, excuse me, it's called The Joke.
Are you ready?
Oh, well, I mean, that's kind of telling.
Yes, it is, Chrissy.
Let's get into it here.
I'm going to play it on my phone so as not to, you know, have AI flag it. Well, I think we heard enough of that.
I mean, I don't even know what to say to that.
No.
That is straight warrant cherry pie is what that reminds me of.
She's my cherry pie is what that reminds me of.
She's my cherry pie.
Definitely like 80s rock influence on that.
Glory lost a tooth, now I'm looking with my eyes.
I couldn't even hear what he was saying.
I've been doing this for 30 years.
I've been doing this for 30 years.
You think I smile, but I cry.
Is that right?
I think it's, you think I cry.
I think, yeah, you want me to cry, but I smile,
or I smile, but you want me to cry, or something like that.
I don't know.
You gotta love the guy's tenacity.
He's also wearing lipstick in the video,
and everyone's, everyone is wearing 80s, neon.
Oh yeah, there's the definite 80s influence.
Look, they're all wearing 80s, neon workout.
Yeah. You okay over there?
Yeah. Oh my gosh poor Chrissy. I know I'm gonna cough. Why didn't you take the day off? I should
you should have just called me. I probably would have forced you to come in anyway. I would have
been like hey. No it was I didn't think it was that bad. I took some mucinex and some cough drops,
but when you're on the spot, on the microphone.
Yeah, no, no, no, it's amplified by a thousand.
It really is, it's very tough.
I've done it before, I know, I feel for you, I really do.
Well, I mean-
It might go right along though with Cory's song.
Oh my God, how terrible is that?
I mean, just terrible.
I mean, he's got a whole catalog of songs
that they're not my style. I don't know any-
Danielle Pletka I guess he's got money to pay people to be part of his band.
Jared Sussman I think that if I had to imagine the Corey Feldman story, and this is Brian's
imagination, so this is not true or factual in any way, shape or form, because I don't
want to, you know, I don't want anybody to get litigious with me. I'm not trying to slander
anybody. Danielle Pl I had to imagine the Corey Feldman story, it goes like this.
Kid actor sees a lot of fame right off the bat, right?
He's in a couple of movies that do very well.
He's universally applauded for his work in such movies as Lost Boys.
What's that other one he did?
Danielle Pletka Goonies.
Jared Sarkissian Goonies, but the first one that he did, like where they go on the adventure.
Danielle Pletka Tons of 80s movies.
Jared Sarkissian Yeah, okay, tons of 80s movies. Anyway, and
he sees an influx of cash. He or his parents somehow run out of that cash at some point.
Danielle Pletka He becomes friends with Michael Jackson.
He did, he was friendly with Michael Jackson, I think, very early on in his career too.
And I think he was friends with Michael until the day that Michael died, if I'm not mistaken.
And claims that Michael never did anything untowdry or weird around him, at least that's Cory's claim.
But then he's friends with Cory Haim, they do a couple of clunkers, you know, the movies as the 90s start to round out and people get a little bit more rough around the edges and grunge
comes in. The Feldman's just, the Corey's just aren't what they used to be. It's not, you know,
no one's seeking them to come do a movie. So at 50 years old or 55 years old or however old he is,
he's not a movie star anymore necessarily. Now.
He's got to do something.
And as his life's passion, having been friends with Michael and having done this since he
was famous as a movie star, he decides to lean on the music.
That's what he wants to do for the rest of his life.
That's going to be his career.
And so he's just doing it the way he knows how.
He's got a little bit of notoriety, a little bit of infamy and fame,
and he goes out there and he tries to make the best of it.
And he's probably touring in the back of a van
like a lot of fucking people are.
You know what I'm saying?
And so I guess from that angle,
I do appreciate where Corey is trying to make
the best of a situation.
It's just terrible music.
It's just terrible music and terrible live performances that everyone wants to go see.
It is a novelty.
It's like, you got to go watch the train ride.
If you can, and listen, to be fair, if Corey came into Atlanta and I could get a ticket
for a reasonable price, I would be there
and a heartbeat. Don't know if I'd be allowed in, but I would definitely go see him for sure. Why?
Because I also want to see the train wreck. I'm also human. I want to see what happens.
Curious.
I want to see if he loses his teeth. And who doesn't want to chant,
here he come, the comeback king. Here he come, the comeback king.
You could be the one chanting. I would be the chance yeah, I'd want to get everyone riled up
You know if we're gonna go to a Cory around yeah, let's yeah, come on
It's Cory fucking Feldman
Who doesn't want this guy at your party?
Good old Cory felt anyway new music out from Cory,
if you wanna check that out.
I don't know where you can find it, but.
I found it on YouTube.
Where did you find it?
Oh, okay.
YouTube, yeah.
I'm the first.
Is it on Spotify?
It can't be on Spotify.
Do you, Matt?
Well, I guess anybody can put their music on Spotify, huh?
I guess so.
Let's check this out real quick.
Because while we're bashing the guy guy we might as well, you know.
Cory Feldman. Oh, yeah, he is on Spotify.
Mm-hmm. Artists follow him.
13,000 monthly listeners.
I think that's about how many the commercial break has on Spotify. So there you go.
I think he's currently on tour with Limp Bizkit.
Oh God.
I'm the Limp Bizkit is everywhere.
Limp Bizkit is everywhere.
Yeah.
Again, not my style of music, but they have really made a comeback.
And Fred Durst with that mop of gray hair.
I mean, he is, he is like the grand papa of new metal and he is doing well.
I mean, Fred Durst, if I have to say this about Fred,
never my favorite music.
I just wasn't into it.
It's not my style.
But I never considered him a dumb person.
Like when you would see him on interviews and stuff,
he seemed like he had his wits about him. And I imagine that Fred
knew, wait long enough, and everything becomes new again. Do you know what I'm saying? And
so he waited long enough, and here they are, they're back, him and, is it Buckethead? Buckethead.
Him and Buckethead back together, turning around around and the crowds are eating it up.
Tens of thousands of people at these shows
just bouncing up and down.
Give me something to break.
Ah!
I did it all for the nookie.
What?
The nookie.
What?
All right, let's take a break and we'll be back.
Hi.
No, you're not dreaming. And yes, this is a new promo. We'll be back. Obviously, please, it's getting hard for me to listen to Brian and Chrissy Begg. So just follow us on Instagram again, that's at the commercial break.
You can also follow us on TikTok at TCB Podcast.
And of course, you know where to go for all things TCB.
That is tcbpodcast.com, baby.
And of course, you can always text us or call us and leave us a voicemail at 212-433-3TCB. Yep.
That phone number is no longer new, but it is still around.
And that's a win.
212-433-3TCB.
Love you.
Bye.
I forgot to tell you that I, so here in Atlanta, in Georgia, the major river that runs through our state
is called the Chattahoochee River, runs from the Hooch, the good old Hooch.
Beth Dombkowski Shoot the Hooch?
Jared Sarr Yeah, and I mean the Hooch.
Beth Dombkowski I've shot the Hooch before.
Jared Sarr Oh, I will never shoot the Hooch again.
Beth Dombkowski I will never shoot the Hooch again either.
Jared Sarr No, but I did.
Beth Dombkowski I did do it.
I did it too.
Jared Sarr I did do it multiple times I did it
in my early 20s and late teens.
I will never do that again.
Why?
Because I know what is in the hooch now
and I'm not gonna do it.
Also, it's like an all day thing
where it's hot, you're drinking.
I mean, it's just, and you're on the water.
It's a hangover in a box basically is what it is. I mean, let's just, and you're on the water. I don't know. It's a hangover in a box, basically, is what it is.
I mean, let's just be real about it.
Yeah, it's day drinking and floating down the river.
Like a lot of other places in America where there are waterways that extend to more than
a mile and can, you know, are more than 10 feet wide, it's a pastime to get a raft,
rent a raft, get a raft, or get multiple rafts or huge rafts
that cost like thousands of dollars.
Yeah, we had a huge raft.
Yeah, so did we.
We got stuck too.
The current was flowing.
The current wasn't in your favor.
And we had to have the guy come get us,
like and tug us back in.
Oh really?
It was not fun.
Yeah, it's not fun.
Like, well, I mean, I guess it can be fun.
It can be fun for like 30 minutes.
Yes.
Maybe an hour.
And this has nothing to do with what I want to talk about,
but there was a radio station here in Atlanta
that Chrissy and I worked at the same signal of station.
It was called 96 Rock.
And I think 96 Rock started this, if I'm not mistaken.
96 Rock or Z93 or one of those.
Shoot the hooch.
Yeah. And what they would
do is they told everybody to come out on a Saturday, bring your, this is back when radio
was like a TikTok, right?
Exactly.
Everybody listened to it. It was the only place of information that any young person
ever cared about.
Cool stuff.
That's right. The Rock just, oh, 96, 96 Rock. There's a white snake. Oh, all brand new and from White Snake.
And come down to the Hooch this Saturday,
if I'm here, we're all gonna be shooting the Hooch.
Yeah, the DJs were celebrities and yeah.
When we got into radio, that time had long since passed.
They were all nodding.
Yeah, so some people were holding on for dear life,
but most people were just getting shuffled
from one station to another. Yeah. And so Shoot the Hooch was this thing where tens
of thousands of people came out with rafts and they literally went down as one big sweaty
mass of humanity down the river pissing and shitting and drinking and throwing cans in
it all the way. Right? And so Shoot the hooch became like this, you know, saying that was,
unless there is today, you know, these are companies called shoot the hooch.
And I don't think it's certainly not as popular as it was before,
but I live near the Chattahoochee river. And I'll tell you what,
on certain weekends,
there are still plenty of people going and shooting the hooch. And so you would,
you know, get in at one place and then meet a van five miles down the
hooch and it would drive you back up to your car. But that five miles with a river that goes one mile
per hour took 60 hours to get down there. It was crazy. It was crazy how long it was. You thought
you'd be in for a couple hours. You get in at nine in the morning at 930 at night,
you're still on the river.
Drunk as a skunk, throwing up.
Ah, it's so true.
Haven't eaten anything.
Right, no, you're not bringing food out there.
No, who thinks about food?
You're like, oh, they're going to have something
to eat on the way.
No, they don't.
It's a fucking river.
You can't get off it if you wanted to.
And then forget about it.
There are rapids, quote unquote, which is sharp, jagged rocks that you poke a hole in your raft or
hurt your feet. This is a dumb thing to do. Anyway, so there's this river and they have this thing
called the Chattahoochee Nature Center. Chattahoochee Nature Center.
Sounds lovely.
It is lovely. It's what it sounds like. It's a nature center. You go there and, you know, they have some animals and they have some information and they have some people that,
you know, tell you about the things and it's a fun place to take the kids for a couple of hours
when it's really hot outside. They have indoors and outdoors and you can, and it's shade and
whatever. So, we decided we're going to take the kids there because we have a pass to go there. So,
we're like, okay, let's take the kids and we'll spend a couple hours there and they'll have fun and we'll go see the
animals and walk through the park and all this other stuff.
So we go and we do the outside thing. It's 99 degrees outside and we are just about done
with the day. Like we've seen everything outside that we have to see. We know that there's
an inside, but it's small and we've been there before and it's just like some fish and a
snake and a frog that's, you know, native it's small. And we've been there before and it's just like some fish and a snake and a frog that's,
you know, native to the area.
It's not anything impressive.
It's not a zoo.
It's this studio with a couple of fish tanks in it.
You know what I'm saying?
It's like, it's not that impressive.
So we're pretty much wrapping up the day.
We've been there for a couple of hours.
It's everyone's hot and tired and we're just ready to go.
And as we are leaving, Astrid like turns the corner down
a path and then I can see her like walking down that path and I'm like, hey babe, babe, let's go,
come on, let's get out of here. We're like trying to walk the other way. She's gotten caught in a
conversation with a lady who is telling Astrid that just a short walk down the nature path,
by the way, this lady has like a shirt on that says like, you know, Chattahoochee Nature Center. She's like
working there.
Beth Dombkowski She's there, yeah.
Jared Sussman Astrid has gotten caught in a conversation with
a lady who has told her that just a short walk away, you can see a plant that has, that
is flowering and only flowers once a year, and it is flowering right now.
Beth Dombkowski Whoa.
Jared Sussman And you can see it.
Now, I am not a botanist.
I do not have any interest in flowers except I buy them for Astrid on occasion.
Like I don't know anything about it.
I don't know the first thing about flora or fauna or whatever.
I don't know anything.
I don't know anything about anything, really.
But Astrid is like giving me this like, come here, come here.
Yeah, I know. I like, I just did a bunch of planting seeds yesterday.
So I like flowers and plants.
Well, congratulate, you would have loved this lady then.
Because now this lady, Astrid's giving me that look that only a husband and a wife have,
which is like, come here, I need you.
And Astrid knows that I can talk my way in and out of any situation, but that's just
not her, right?
She's very polite and very nice,
and so she's like nodding her head to the lady. This lady is obviously lovely, but has no other
information in her brain except for flora and fauna. You know what I'm saying? She's probably
in her, she's probably my age. She's like coated in sunscreen. She's like, her face is reflecting the sun back at me, like a weird mirror, you know?
And she's sweaty as can be. I mean, just like sweat pouring down. Anyway, I turn the corner,
I see this lady, she's talking to Astrid and Astrid goes, oh, this lady says that there's a
flower blooming that only blooms once a year. And she's giving me like that tone of voice where it's like, talk us out of this one, Brian.
Isn't that cool? Don't you have somewhere to be?
But I don't know what to do because as soon as I turn the corner, I'm already caught in
conversation with this lady. She's like, oh, oh, you should see this. You have to see this. I,
I'm so glad someone came up on this because this is amazing. I almost never see this. We have to see this. You have to see this.
And I'm like, okay, sure. Is it a short walk down there? It's just right around the corner.
And I'm like, okay, I should have known that just right around the corner, then, you know,
600 yards away, another half mile down this path. We're walking, we're walking, we're
walking. She's pointing out this, she's pointing out that.
She was guiding you there. Okay, good.
She's guiding us, but then she's like an elementary school teacher. She's like, when a plant blooms,
they have a what? And I'm like, a flower? They do, but that's not the answer I was looking
for. They also have a particuli. And I'm like, oh, yeah, sure. And they have
a reticuli and a particuli. And I'm like, like a penis, exactly. Like a man's venus
and a penis. Exactly. And I'm like, oh, okay, all right. And when a bird stops and puts
its particuli in the vediculi, it means what? And I'm like, I don't know.
Baby birds. Yeah, baby birds. Are they using protection or not using protection? And the kids are so,
they're like, you know, oh, Danny, I want food, I snack, snack, snack. And we're walking down this
path for what seems like forever. And then we stop and she's like, oh, look at it. And I'm like,
Chrissy, we are at a nature park. That largely means
everything's been untouched. It's literally a bag of bushes as far as I'm concerned. It's the kind
of stuff that I spray chemicals on in my backyard to get rid of. I have no fucking clue what she's
looking at. And she's like, just look at it. Isn't that gorgeous? And I'm like, ah, what are we looking
at here? Chrissy, not only do I not see it,
there's no flowers anywhere. To me, there's no flowers. What she's looking at is, it's like a,
they call it a pitcher plant. Do you know what a pitcher plant is?
Nicole Soule-Nagel-Nagel I think so.
Jared Soule-Nagel It looks like almost like a glass pitcher. And when the bugs go down in it,
they land in some liquid and the liquid dissolves and it eats it up,
right? Okay, great. Wonderful. It's a Venus fly trap. I don't know. Something like that.
And now I'm looking at the, it's like one little stalk hanging out of the ground and
it's got this tiny little hole in the middle and I'm like, wow. And she proceeds to give
us a seven hour lesson on particuli and veticuli and reticuli. And I'm like, oh my God. And she's like, isn't
this, I mean, we are witnessing something that nature only allows us to see in certain circumstances.
And I'm like, yeah, that's what they told us about babies. Look how many we have now.
I don't know what the fuck is going on. That's what the gynecologist told me and my wife,
but now we have so many children. I don't know what the fuck. It took us forever to get away from this lady forever. And then she's like, are you going toward the building?
I'll walk with you. And I'm like, oh, great. Fantastic. And the kids are screaming and yelling.
And I'm just like, listen, she was very sweet. And to the right person, this would have been the most
exciting day ever, but I am not the right person to get excited about the pitcher plant flower.
I'm just not. I mean, I'm sorry. Did person to get excited about the pitcher plant flower. I'm just not.
I mean, I'm sorry.
Did you take a picture of the pitcher?
No! Did I take a picture of the picture? My kid had my phone, he was playing some game with it,
just to keep him alive. I mean, it was like almost death due to boredom going on.
Oh, no.
If I didn't care, you think my kids cared? No. And I tried to get them excited,
oh, look, the particular, the particular.
And my kids like, what's your password? Oh, it's one, two, three, four. There you go.
So then we get back up to this building and we're going to go see the few fish that they have.
At least cool off.
Yes. And man, was it nice and cool in there. I mean, it's like, it's such a refreshing change. So again, they're in, they have this like little area in the back where they've got, I mean,
I guess it's more than a, it is a fish tank, but it's a nice fish tank. It's a big fish tank. It's
got that running water so the fish can pretend they're swimming upstream. Oh, that's cool.
It's got like a little trout in it. And there's some other types of fish that are native to Georgia.
To the Chattahoochee.
Yeah, that's right. And, and then there's a couple of snakes and there's a couple of frogs.
And then, you know, there's a couple of other type
of animals in there.
But they're all like not animals you would get super excited
and then the field mouse or the whatever.
Right.
The common yard hamster, I don't know.
Something, I don't know.
Field mice, they're always a good one.
Yeah, that's always a good, you know, they do have the cute little ears though.
They do.
So we get to the last, I'm just letting the kids run around, get some, you know, get some
cool air on them before we get in the car and go.
And really I'm just killing time before bedtime is what I'm doing, which is what all parents
are doing always.
Right.
Just trying to get to 7 p.m. when everyone goes hopefully to sleep. So here I am standing there talking to Astrid and I look over and I see in this window,
and I've never seen this before and I've been to this place before, in this window, I see
what looks like a stuffed animal.
And in some of the displays, they aren't real animals.
They're like, yeah, they're like just set up to be, yeah, they're like, a taxidermy.
Yeah. So I thought, oh, that's a cute one. But then I noticed it's got like food in there and
everything. And I'm like, wow, that's, they're taking it to the, you know, they're taking it
further on this one, like chopped up carrots and stuff. I don't know.
What, what did it look like?
It looked fuzzy and furry, but I couldn't see its face. So I thought that they had, you know,
positioned it in a way where you just see its back.
It was like fuzzy furry with different, like, you know,
muted colored fur.
And I'm like, oh, okay.
What's-
Fuzzy furry, like with the, with like four legs?
No, it was like curled up.
Oh.
It was like curled up.
Like a little bear?
Yeah, you could only see its back.
So all you could see was like this little curvature.
No, it was small.
It was small.
It was like, you know,
what I could see if it was like a foot, maybe a foot and a half. And so I'm like, okay. And then I keep on looking at it and
I'm like, well, that's a weird display. Let me, and so I step up and I look down into the glass.
It's like right at my eye level. So I stepped down and look into the glass to see if I could see
what kind of stuff animal they have there. And up pops a little nose. It is a baby possum. I am not
and up pops a little nose, it is a baby possum. I am not fucking kidding you.
It's a baby possum, it's a young possum.
It is a young fucking possum.
It found you.
And I'm like, ah!
I was like, ah!
I got scared.
You saw what I saw that night at the house.
I saw what you saw.
It was a little bit bigger than that.
It wasn't a baby baby, but you could tell it was young.
Because, and also its fur was so like fresh and fluffy.
Like it didn't look stringy and oily and weird.
You know?
It was like.
It didn't look like it had been on the road for a while.
It didn't look like it had been run over
by multiple cars in front of my house.
And so here it is, just pokes its head right up.
Nope.
I know.
And then it just kind of lays its chin down.
Like it just kind of lays down, but now not curled up.
It just like lays like a dog would almost on like its paws.
And I'm like, fuck.
Yeah, all right.
Yeah, all right.
I get it.
You're kind of cute.
Yeah, they are cute.
And then I'm like reading the sign about the possums
and possums play an important part in society.
Well, they're known as trash collectors or whatever.
Right? And I'm like, fuck. I got taken by the possum. I really did. I got taken by the possum.
I took a bunch of pictures. I was like, ah, God damn it. I still don't like the old possums,
but I'll give it to you. These little possums are cute.
If they're little and they have been bathed by the people at the Chattanoche Nature Center,
then they're kind of cute.
And they're feeding them like carrots and not my daughter's dirty diaper, then, you
know, then they're kind of cute.
I will give it that.
I will give it that.
Oh, that was hilarious.
I mean, so right on, spot on for you.
And his name was like, you know,
Petey the Possum or something.
And I'm like, fuck.
Leave it to Disney and the Chattahoochee Nature Center
to like humanize a little animal, Petey the Possum.
Petey the Possum was rescued after his parents
were smashed by an 18-wheeler.
Maybe that was the one that was crawling around.
Probably not.
No, no, probably not.
Yeah, this one is.
I never saw that one again.
I saw it two nights in a row, but that was it.
Wow.
Unless it grew two and a half feet in the three days.
And made its way from downtown all the way to the Chattahoochee.
That's 27 mile trek up the Chattahoochee River.
I do have to say it was kind of cute.
And then they also had a beaver in a captivity and that beaver, I couldn't believe its tail.
Like up close, it's a full-grown adult. It was huge. First of all.
They did a lot of shit with that tail.
Wow. That tail was like a piece of waxed leather.
It was weird.
Poor Beaver, he was trying to get inside his habitat.
He was outside, but you could tell there was an inside where the keepers feed him and probably
a fan or something.
He was biting the cage.
He was like, argh, argh, argh, argh.
He was having a full blown panic attack.
I know, we showed the kids and I was like, this is torture.
Stop it.
But it was a rescue possum.
I mean a rescue beaver and a rescue possum.
All the animals there are rescued.
We saw bald eagles, lots of owls, all kinds of cool stuff.
No bald eagle.
Yeah.
Every once in a while you got to show the kids
there's something besides the Disney channel.
That's true.
And a video game on your iPad.
Very true.
Not that they cared, they went right back
to their video games and iPads and we got home,
but whatever, at least for 10 minutes they were away from it.
And they got a lesson in particular,
which is not the real terminology she used,
so don't text me.
And they sell the flower, they only flower once a year.
Yeah, I mean, how exciting.
When they grow up, they'll understand the importance of it.
I'm grown up and I don't understand the importance of it.
But I really don't.
It's all a cog in the wheel, Chrissy.
We're all just cogs in the wheel.
Yes, we are.
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All right, Chrissy, that's all I can do for today.
I think so.
But I love ya.
I love you.
And best to you.
And best to you out there in the podcast universe.
Until next time, Chrissy and I always say,
we do say and we must say,
goodbye.
Until next time, Chrissy and I always say, we do say, and we must say, good bye! I gotta get some cocaine! Gotta be crazy!