The Commercial Break - Release! Release! Release!

Episode Date: August 6, 2021

Bryan and Krissy discuss the Olympics, the most scandalous outfits in women's sporting and Bryan's uncanny ability to get every fact in a story wrong and make it sound convincing! Then the gang compares the commercial space race audio and the Red Bull Stratos event. 10...7...5..3..1..LIFT OFF on this episode of The Commercial Break!  LINKS: Watch this episode on Youtube TCBTV-minus Sponsor FUM (Use Code TCB) MEMPHO Music Fest (Oct 1st-3rd 2021) Subscribe to The Commercial Break Podcast Youtube Channel New Episodes on Tuesdays and now Fridays everywhere! Text or leave us a message: +1 [phone] FOLLOW US: Instagram: @thecommercialbreak @bryangcomedy @tcbkrissy ClubHouse: @bryangreen @tcbkrissy ClubHouse: The Commercial Break Club on Clubhouse! (home of live recordings) Twitter: tcbbryan Facebook: The Commercial Break Podcast YouTube: Youtube.com/TheCommercialBreak Email: [e-mail] A Chartable Top 100 Comedy Podcast #1 Trending Comedy Podcast Worldwide! (Chartable) #1 Trending Comedy Podcast U.S.(Chartable) An Apple Top 100 Comedy Podcast  Top 1% Downloaded Podcasts, Worldwide (ListenNotes) A Hot 50 Podcast (Podcast Magazine) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

And welcome back to WSHIT and as we all know the wins here around Krab Apple get pretty wippy this time of year and it's a great fun out there on Gordo Pond where the kids can do some sailing and some surfing across the 16 by 16 yard pond known as Fat Pond. Let's go to local surf reporter Gabby Doughjo for a report on the surf. Oh, bro, it's just like, dude, you get the best barrels ever, dude. It's just like you pull in, and you just get spit right out of them. You just drop in and just smack the lip. Whoop!

Drop down, snap. Ah! And then after that, you just drop, he's right at the bell and getting pitted, so pitted like that. While I didn't understand a damn word, sure does sound like fun. Keep surfing that pond, Gabby. We'll be back. After this, commercial break, wearing a thong of epic proportions.

Really? A thong in the back, in the front. Caught creative swimming. I was glued. I bet you were. I couldn't stop. I really love creative swimming. I was like, wow.

Creative swimming. I never knew I would like this. Can I go see that live? Three't stop. I really love creative swimming. I was like, wow. Creative swimming. I never knew. I would like this. Can I go see that live? Do they have to have that on demand?

There is no camera angle of this. They were literally shooting it, because they could not figure out how to get the webcam. They have a fucking $13 webcam. They bought it best by a guy's upside. I wish you would have told me your own Amazon. I wish you would have told me the Virgin. Oh yeah.

I wasn't even in the right place. I was filming the Amazon rocket. Aw. That's why I missed all the action. You guys were in New Mexico? Ah, I was down here in Florida. That's a don't mean to be in Florida. I'm literally here at the Amazon warehouse waiting for you.

I went to the return address on the package. Okay, you want me to translate that for you? Yes. The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Oh, it's not everything to the commercial break! Yay! I remember I was in this, this is Chris, you hold the hand. Happy New Year! Best to you out there!

And best to you, Brian! And best to you, how best to you out there in the podcast universe. Welcome to another episode of the commercial break! Yay! Yay! Oh my gosh, you're so much to talk about. I can't even stand it. I'm gonna tell you all about it.

So, if you're watching Olympics. Have I been work? Watching the Olympics. Oh, the Olympics, yes. Oh my God, I'm so excited about the Olympics. The Olympics is something that I just get into so much because it's all these odd, weird sports. Remember what I was telling you?

I found a handball one night, and I was watching this. All those weird, like, strange, you know, Olympic-type activities. I'm so into them. I'm so into all of them. It's the stranger the better. Like yesterday, I was watching creative swimming. Creative swimming. Creative swimming. You know what creative swimming is? No. It's like synchronized swimming, like, to synchronize swimmers, but they do the little dance, and they stick their legs up, and they go go like that like in the old-time new movies Right in the talkies back in the day

You know, you stick your legs up in the air. I have never seen bikini never seen a swim suit on a one So scantily clad as I saw in creative swimming. Oh, no, they're getting creative with the bathing suit creative Let me take a piece of floss and put it in my woo Chrissy I, I was stunned! Stunned! At how the Olympics is allowing this to happen on NBC and three o'clock in the afternoon when children are home, they are allowing these, this is not like the team sport where all of them are together like doing the whole thing.

This is just to win it at one time. You know, underwater for two and three minutes at a time, kicking their legs in all kind of different directions, wearing a thong of epic proportions. Really? A thong in the back, and a thong in the front. I thought creative swimming. I was, I was, I was glued. I bet you were.

I couldn't stop. I really love creative swimming. I was like, wow, creative swimming. I never knew what I'd like to do. Can I go see that live? They have that on, They have that on demand. How can I get to that, gonna get more of that? I couldn't believe it.

First of all, the pure athleticism of these women is unmatched. They're literally underwater for two and three minutes, like moving their hands in different ways. The breath, where it's gonna take. They'll like move six inches that way and move six inches. That way, and they're kicking it at the same time while they're doing this whole number underwater and the thing about NBC is, you know,

they're getting every angle. So you could see the women underwater like holding their breath into it for two minutes at a time, minute and a half, two minutes at a time. It was unbelievable. Meanwhile, their entire asses were sticking out of the water, which was crazy.

Who won the gold? Don't know. That's what I thought. I thought he didn't pay much attention to that part of it. I was floored. I mean, listen, what's funny to me is you have like the handball, the ladies of handball, which I did a little research on this, just because I'm a feminist.

I did a little research on the handball whole situation. Have you heard about this? The controversy going on with the handball ladies? The bikini bottoms? The bikini bottoms. Yes. They're saying, hey listen, not necessarily for the Olympics. They are getting upset about the Olympics.

What they're really talking about is a professional handball beach league, which requires that they wear basically thongs to play professional beach volleyball, a handball. And so I did a little research online, this is just a research for the show that I was doing. And, all the way. And what I realized is it's quite the request

to ask these ladies to wear this outfit, game after game. I mean, they're out there really hustling around and throwing themselves this way and that way, and there's nothing to those outfits. I mean, they're out there really hustling around and throwing themselves this way and that way, and there's nothing to those outfits. I mean, nothing, it's clear. And then you watch the promotional videos that they put out and it's all about their asses. It's nothing about the handball.

They're, you can't, they don't want to make, they don't show the shots, they don't show the athleticism. What they show is the girls standing around in a huddle from behind showing their asses, right? And that's being put out by the actual professional handball lead. I have to agree with the ladies on this one. Like, I mean, you know, if you're an athlete and all you want to do is just play your sport, yeah.

You know, okay, put some clothes here. I think it's a valid request. Request, yes. But I also agree with this. If there's going to be a uniform, let there be a uniform, right? I understand why there has to be uniforms in sports and you want the uniforms to be what? Uniform. That's why they call it a uniform, let there be a uniform, right? I understand why there has to be uniforms in sports, and you want the uniforms to be what? uniform, that's why they call it a uniform. But I'm telling you what, these women

that were doing creative swimming yesterday, that was an insane outfit, go Google it, go Google it, and see what these women were. It's a one piece, but it's cut really high up on the stomach, and then when it cuts high up on the stomach, it goes in and it doesn't come out. It's like, it just goes in some valley. It's not how slicing through the water.

It was slicing through the vaginas, that outfit was slicing directly through their asses. That's all I gotta say. I could... Believe it or not, that has to wear it, I mean. Hey, when you're 19, from Yugoslavia, and you're at the top of your sport, I guess you just say,

what I was also interested to realize is that many of these countries are paying even the women that are doing creative swimming, which is not, I don't know if there's a creative swimming league out there, or the professional, but they pay them, the state pays them to do this, where in the United States, there's no unified Olympic committee that pays you to do sport. They don't give you room and board and stuff like that. Like the gymnastic, the more popular sports, I think they have their own like United States gymnastics

association who will put you up in the house while you're training and feed you and stuff like that. But they're not like giving you, you know, a hundred thousand dollar contract to go play, you know, to go do the Olympics. So these women who are doing creative swimming, I was interested to learn that almost all the countries except for the United States, they all get paid to do this. Like this is the thing that they do 24 hours a day, seven days a week, they are creative

swimmers and the state pays them or takes care of them to do this. And I thought that to be very interesting. Interesting. And maybe that's the reason why the United States is getting its ass kicked all over the Olympics We are losing Everywhere we used to be winning. Yeah, that's kind of crazy isn't it? We're up in the top three. Well, this is winning. No, well We are in the top three metal count, right? And we have the top three metal counts simply because we have more people competing in more

Sports. Yeah, 600 athletes competing in all these sports But we usually are like you know right up there with China beating China last time in the last summer of more people competing in more sports. Yeah, 600 athletes competing in all these sports. But we usually are like, you know, right up there with China beating China, last time in the last summer Olympics, we almost doubled the gold count of China, the next person, the next country closest to us. Now China is beating us in the gold count.

Yeah, I don't understand. Maybe the pandemic? Yeah, maybe the fact that we don't pay our athletes a fair promise. We need a combination, but for sure the pandemic, This is just a weird year. I don't know 2020 Olympics in 2021 Welcome to NBC's coverage of last year's Olympic today Last year's Olympics today that should have been I should have been the tagline

2021 the last year's Olympics today 2021, the last year's Olympics today. Yeah, tcv5guys.com is where you go. You can find out more about Chrissy and I read all about us. Read all the show notes. You can listen to the audio. You can watch all the video and you can find all the other things that you need to find out about the commercial break. Like our Instagram, our YouTube, our, what else we have for Square and all that other

Twitter for Square. For Square. Catch us on fire side. I do want to mention that. YouTube are what else we have four square and all that other Twitter Catch us on fireside. I do want to mention that you want to make sure that you go and you download the fireside app now available to Everybody in your app store or why you find your applications. I'm not exciting. I really do like that. Yeah, the it's a great platform Chrissy and I will be doing live shows there will actually be recording our shows live there and then the audience can get involved We playing games will be having the use of fun. That'll be so fun to have the audience interaction. Absolutely.

They can chime in on all the absurd stuff that we talk about. Like when we talk about people who fall in love with lamps, then we can have the audience come up and talk about how they fell in love with the lamp. Not gonna happen, no one falls in love with the lamp. There's only like 70 of my in the world. But go to tcbpodcast.com and one more thing I wanna mention, we have a new contest.

That new contest is going on right now, started about episode number 85. It's available at youtube.com slash the commercial break. You go there, you watch the video, all the way through because we are hiding little hints and clues, you want to write those down, stuff them away for a different, it is a scavenger hunt, it's exactly what it is.

And I'll ask a question at some point in the next right now, I think it's like six to seven weeks. I'll ask a question, you'll be able to answer that question if you've been paying attention to those clues when that's the case. We'll tell you to go somewhere, give us your answer and when you give us your answer, if it's correct, you'll be entered into in our next prize,

which is like a gold dot gift card, but it's not a gold dot gift card. So, but you know how we like to do it? We like to do a pick. We gave four way $500 last month. I intend to do something, can this or it coming up? So, just pay attention. Siding.

We'd love you to win. And info at tcbpodcast.com. Send us in your show ideas, tell us what you like, what you don't like, and we send out free swag here and there. So, maybe you're one of the lucky winners. You get one of these beautiful TCB cups. TCB. Yes, here.

Cheers. Cheers. A couple of weeks ago, I, uh, excuse me, a couple of weeks ago, I decided we were talking about the space race, the commercial space race. We're talking about how boring I thought the coverage was for Sir Richard Branson. And then I watched the Jeff Bezos one, which was better by an inch. By an inch. It wasn't all that great, right?

And then I was also talking about how when Felix Bumbgarner jumped out of the stratus, I got all the information. I was completely had no idea what the names were. I was calling the guy John. His name is Felix. It's Felix Bumbgarner. He's like, he's from Russia or something. He's not, I think I called him Austria.

And he's not Austria. I can't believe you and Veloster made something up. Totally lied about all of it. He's done it so completely. But I gotta, if you believe anything that comes out of this mouth, you should get your head checked. Especially when I'm talking on this microphone.

Few things that I did get right. The Surridge's and the Branson thing was really boring. The Virgin Galactic one is really boring. I got a lot of feedback about that episode. And a lot of people thought it was funny, right? Especially when we had Billy the camera guy that was in there. And talking about how the old man was talking to Felix when he was up there, he's like,

job, job, Felix, jo, jo, Felix, Felix, shit's going wrong. I can't hear you. He's all over the place. Right? People were like, that's so funny, but you know, that didn't have it, did it. And I'm like, I, from what I can recall, it kind of did, right? I was making that up, obviously.

It was exaggerating the story. I don't think it happened word for word like that. So I decided I was going to go back and watch the conversation. I checked yourself. Fact check myself. Watch the seven and a half hour program. After you had. After I had made it all up,

I decided to go fact check myself. Here's a funny story. I got invited to go down to do a podcast. The guy named Tommy from MSCS Media. And he went down there. We had this three and a half hour conversation, long wide-ranging conversation about all kind of different things, right? First thing I say to the guy is,

I don't talk about politics, I find it to be boring, right? I find it to be boring and everybody else can do that. So let's just, you know, not so many other people do it. Yeah, so many other people to do it. It's not interesting, it's such a hot button topic, you know, everyone's gonna hate you no matter what you say.

And Ann, quite frankly, I'm not the most knowledgeable person in the world about it. I'm like everybody else, everyone else tries to be a fucking expert about everything. I'm not an expert on politics or anything quite frankly, except for me, for maybe comedy podcasting of which I'm not really an expert, right?

And so I tell the guy, I'm like, you know, it's just, it's Tommy. Let's just stay away from politics. And Tommy says, I agree with you 100%. Right? And it's obvious that Tommy and I may not see eye to eye on everything political, because Tommy, his guest the week before, had been Roger Stone.

Oh, Lord. Roger Stone. Right? Okay, that's all I got to say about that. Yeah. Exactly. So we go down there, we have this wide ranging conversation about a number of different things.

And during the conversation, we kind of have a disagreement about some facts regarding some things, right? And I'm like, no, I'm pretty sure. Da, da, da, da, da, da, right? So I get out of the studio, I have a great time. Guys really super nice, couldn't have been more pleasant. We had a really good time, generally stayed away from politics.

I get out of there, I go back to the hotel, and I'm like, just reviewing the conversation in my head, and I'm like, huh. I don't really think that I was right. I don't, I hope I was right about that. So I fact checked myself on like three or four of the different items that Tommy and I had like a little like back and forth about.

Like, you know, I think that's right. No, it's not right. Yeah, I think it is, you know? And the truth was, on every single point that I had felt strongly about, that I was telling that I had the facts correct, I was so fucking wrong I couldn't have been. So now I'm like, holy shit, this video is going to come out and people are going to be like, what a shit. Every n*** knows that's wrong.

Like I said, there is a privacy law online in the United States of America now, where you can pick and choose your cookies on every website, right? Because I have an iPhone and now they do this. They do, yeah. Every iPhone has it. Or accept tracking and tracking.

And tracking, you can choose your cookies if you can opt out of the cookies you have to. If you want, if you want to browse on Safari or if you want to be available on Safari, you have to make that option available to these two people. Every hosting company does. So I am adamant that there is a law that that has been inactive. I mean, as it's always like, I think you're wrong, but I'm like, nope, I'm right. You're going to find out. That's what I was way wrong. Yeah, there is no law. There is a law that's being talked about, but

there's no, there's a law in the UK in the European Union, but there's no law there. So just for the future, if you happen to see a video flow down around there, with me just talking about random facts and I have no idea about. Let me repeat myself. Don't listen to a fucking word I say, especially when it's coming out of a like any politician out there. Yeah, just say what people want to hear. If I say it enough times, people will believe me. That's our extent of getting into politics on the show. Absolutely. And something with confidence that people want to hear. That's right. If you're like, wow, great show. News is concise and informational. By the way, thank you to people who are leaving Apple podcast reviews.

I think they heard our, they felt bad for us. They were like, they're really leaving them. It's so sweet. To catch you up for the new listeners, to catch you up a couple of months ago or about a month and a half ago, we started getting a bunch of reviews saying that what a great news show we were and how informational we were, they always learned something and our facts were a correct inconsecited. And we were like, what's the fuck for you, talk to them? Because I think around that time was when we were also doing like sex doll, sex doll

sex dolls. Yeah, we were talking about sex dolls. I mean, I don't know who these people were, but what I realized is another commercial break was doing some news stories, another podcast with the word commercial break in it, we're doing the news podcast, and people were leaving them reviews on our Apple Podcast platform.

So I think some people felt bad for us, so they let them wrote podcasts reviews about our podcast. Thank you very much, we appreciate it. Yeah, keep them coming. I fact check myself about the field, Thank you very much. We appreciate it. Yeah, keep them coming. I fact check myself about the feelers, bum garden thing. Okay.

And I went and I watched all of them. I watched Bezos, I watched Brainson, and I watched Felix. Just to make all bees. Bum gardener. All bees. Bum, oh, that's true. Bezos.

Branson. And bum gardener. You see me? It's like my brand. Buzzo's. Branson. Zyla Fond. Would you like to hear a little bit of each one of those calls?

Yes. Do you want to hear the actual audio? I've got those pulled up. Let's hear the actual audio from each of these. So you can see that while I was exaggerating and not correct about any of the facts, the why the substance wasn't correct, the style certainly was. You ready? Yes.

Let's start with Virgin. Here's a little clip of the exciting climax of the 12-hour television show that was Virgin Galactic, Richard Branson goes to space. You haven't missed a thing, right? Here we go. This is the cleaned up audio, by the way. This is after the fact she says multiple times

in the actual audio, this is like the highlight reel, right? And she says in the actual audio, she says multiple times, we're audio. This is like the highlight reel, right? And she says in the actual audio, she says multiple times, we're so sorry the cameras aren't working. You'll get to see this on the replay. But here you go. At which point they'll start what we call the gamma turn, where we turn directly up and head to space.

We'll start the gamma rays in your brain. I know. Oh, gamma. One minute to release now. It's getting real. It's getting real. It's getting real. It's getting real. It's about to happen.

Did you practice that? Did you like, you couldn't think of something better to say? You have sights that's getting real. Holy shit! They could die right here. D minus 30 seconds to Richard Branson, the third most rich person on earth is gonna die

So exciting you can imagine her in bed such a big cup Here I come how are you doing down there? Get real it's getting real wrong hole whole. Uh, be this. That's just dead air. It's a dead air. 45 seconds.

Say something, woman. Say something. Listen to this. This is insane. Let me remind you for those of you listening. I can probably just talk over the dead air. She's not awake. Let me remind you for those of you listening, I can probably just talk over the day She's not she's not awake. She she

She is an REM sleep right now. She's currently taking a nap. I Realized it's been a long day here on television camera, but this girl can't hear anything Let's hold it. Listen Just carry out for a second here. Okay, let's name. You had all this time to think about the millions and millions of people across the earth that were going to be watching Sir Richard Borence and take the first commercial flight up into quote,

unquote space, right? You should have thought of space. Edge of space, yeah, we'll get to that in a second. You know, you could have had all this time to think about all the possibilities that you could say, all the wonderful, the wall to go back and watch Walter Kong, Cronkite, you know, do the moon landing, go watch the guys who did the the shuttle, you know, the space shuttle challenger and all this other stuff. They watch fucking Apollo 11, get

some inspiration and you woman. It's time to wake up. Yeah, couldn't you say something? Couldn't you say something in the foot in T minus one minute until the first commercial Passengers go to space quote unquote space, right history making history making and all you can think to say is one minute This is getting real 45 Richard Richard Have you shit yourself yet? This is getting real. 45 seconds. 30 seconds. Richard! Richard! Have you shit yourself yet? I mean, I want to remind everybody that during this dead air, there is one camera angle and one camera angle only, and that is showing the actual space capsule, the rocket that is

sitting on the airplane, right? I told you about this. Two fuselages, a bridge this, two fuselages, a bridge connecting those two fuselages and stuck up under that bridge is the actual rocket. They're gonna drop it, it's gonna go zoom up and it's gonna shoot it's, you know, whatever, and then it's gonna go up into space.

Meanwhile, this girl can't think of anything to say in the entire minute leading up to this moment of, you know, climax. Still waiting. Still waiting. Still waiting. And you couldn't see 30 seconds. The spaceship unity pie under arming the launch pylon now. Or it was like a tiny little dot. Right. Once they took off any one.

I'm ready for release. 20 seconds. 20 seconds. I could talk over. I don't even think she sounds like. We can fill in. Yeah, we can fill it. Yes, the only one We can fill in. Yeah, we can fill it. Yes. The only one camera angle right now, and when it leaves, right, then there's no other camera angle.

They're shooting it from Earth. Five? So it's like a little dot. Listen to this. Five, four, three, two. I mean, we've all counted backwards from five in this manner. She can't even count backwards from five.

She's so lazy Why woman why why person out there three two one release release release release release release release release release release release release Oh, asteroid, release, release. Oh, Astrid. Release, release, release. Yeah, it's not very exciting. T minus 5, 2, 1, release, release, release. I'm going to go get a cigarette and take a shower. Ignition? Good rocket motorburn? There's Mach 1. Just into the guy behind her by the way. There's another guy in the studio with her, right? And he's doing the commentary he wishes she was doing. He's like, come on, let's go.

Go buddy. Go listen to him. Listen to him real closely. Trimming now. Did you do that? No. You can hear it back there. Trim complete. Unity is pointed directly up and heading to space. Things are looking great. We are 25 seconds into the burn now approaching Mach 2. I think she's having an orgasm. I think that's so excited. She's never been in our entire life.

It's a controlled orgasm. Okay. I think that's so excited. He's ever been in our entire life. It's a controlled, controlled orgasm. Okay, you get the point. Yes. Extraordinary boring broadcasts, right? Mm-hmm. Meanwhile, there is no camera angle of this. There is literally shooting it. She, because they could not figure out how to get the webcam. They have fucking $13 webcam. They bought it best by... Ah, guys, I'm sorry.

I wish you would have told me your own Amazon. I wish you would have told me. Well Amazon I wish you would have told me the birds. Oh, yeah, I wasn't even in the right place I was filming the I was filming Amazon rocket. Oh That's why I missed all the action You guys were in New Mexico. Oh, I was down here in Florida That's you told me to be in Florida. I'm literally here at the Amazon warehouse, which is waiting for you.

I went to the return address on the package. That's where the rocket was. Oh, guys, I'm so sorry. I feel like a lich down. What do you say you give it one more try? Half price. Go back up. Go back up. Give it another try.

You guys did a real good job the first time. At least I heard you did. We couldn't see it. Was it my phone? Oh, sorry. Did anyone bring a phone or something? Yeah, I mean, really, there could have been a better camera.

Yeah, better, better everything. Yeah. Totally. Okay, ready? Now let's step it up a little bit. Let's go to bezels. Let's go in bezels. Let's go bezels.

About two millimeters. Oh wait, no, no, wrong one. I'm sorry, here we go. Ready? That'll come later. Okay, we're ready. Here we go, everybody. Thousands of people contributed years to this historic moment.

Ladies and gentlemen. Now you've got a professional on camera talent. Yeah. Ready to rock. This one. This one's good, right? Yeah, it was early in the morning. Now, woke up in the room. Billy figured out how to get it all together. Billy. There's cameras inside. There's cameras outside. Yeah. They had a drone that was flying like maybe, I don't know, in my guess is at least the, you know, spatially I thought it was maybe within five football fields that a drone was about 1,000, 2,000 feet in the air and it actually, the camera went from, when it was on the ground,

almost as it was passing by and it was passing by really close. It was a unique angle that I've never seen before because you can't put a helicopter in your rocket, right? So they never fly helicopters with that kind of angle, but they obviously had a drone to drone work perfectly. The shot was good, it almost looked surreal. It almost looked like fake, like they had done it on CGI, but it wasn't.

It was just a really good camera angle of a rocket taking off. Yeah, it was great. Yeah. Time for George and first human flight. Godspeed, first crew of New Shepard. Let's light this candle. Let's light this candle. It's a Roman candle.

Hey, Bob, can you come in here for a second? I'm getting ready for the Bezos thing. I got a couple, ready? Ha, ha, ha. Ha. Let's put a firecracker in Bezos' ass. What do you think about that one? No?

Do it, Racy? OK, I got another one. Ha, ha, ha. Let's stick our firecracker in Bezos' ass. What do you think about that one? No? Do it, Racy? Okay, I got another one. Let's stick our dick in it. No? No? Okay. I look like a dick. I look like a penis. Yeah, I look like a dick. I think I'm gonna take it off.

I'm like, what's exactly like a penis? Let's stick this dick in space ass. Let's loob dick in space ass Let's loob this Custin dentus space get in there Bob No, okay one more release release release no, okay. Oh, yeah, I guess that's true the bands Branson girl did that But she got one she was like like this candle Like this candle. So now the thing is taking off and

That's what all this noise is and I think what you're hearing actually is the drones the sounds of the drones. Yeah T minus 10 9 8 7 They learned how to count here. I did. 4. I'm going to get dropped. Great job. 2, 1. Jeez. Pass on.

Yeah. Like they even have the sound, like the microtons, like they're all mic'd up. You can hear it gutter-o-thrust and gah! So we're doing a little better on this one. Yeah, it sounds better. It's more exciting. Sounds like the girls actually standing in the flame, but I mean, yeah. Go, go, go, go, go.

As if they're pushing the rock up in the space. I'm picturing them with like, you know, those paddle boats. Yeah, those little little wheels, yeah. The paddle boats. I'm picturing them with like, you know, those catal mucs. Yeah, those little petal mucs. Yeah, those little petal mucs. Yeah, those little petal mucs. No, those little petal mucs. No, those little petal mucs. So this girl gets it.

Like, she's trying to give it a little hype. She's a little saucy, little color. Like, listen to the roar of the BE3 engine. We are just about to pass through MaxQ. Max from a dynamic pressure. Yeah, I don't even know what MaxQ is, but it sounds exciting when this girl's yelling at it. Yeah, MaxQ. I'm with this with Max Q

Max Q is confirmed. That's what I would have been Max Q holy shit word Max Q Not only what that means, but it's exciting Next we're going to Max P And liquid oxygen as the propellant it's a nice Not just clean in terms of a beautifully performing, but what comes out of it, it's steam, right? I am a firm I met by, but it's fantastic. Right? Who's she asking? The glow of the engine underneath the rocket just, okay. All right, so this girl gets it, right?

She's got a little, she's got a little uh, spunker and junk, right? She's feeling it, she's got the excitement of the moment. She's, you know, she's no Walter Cronk, right? Or, you know, she's... Dan Rather. Dan Rather, or, you know, listen. It's not that kind of moment either. We're not walking on the moon. We're taking the second commercial flight to space,

but this girl... There's a little bit more prepared for this, yeah. Now, let's get to John Kittingger. John Kittingger is the person who before Felix held the world record, the confirmed world record for highest skydive, right? Oh, okay. So he also did this.

He also went up in a fucking balloon and jumped out close, you know, much lower to earth, right? But he also jumped out of a balloon. Oh, okay. John is the person that is talking to Felix. He's the one who's walking him through here and we're hearing a third voice, which is actually the TV commentator.

But I think what they realize in the red, at about halfway through this red bull thing is that John is far more exciting than the TV commentator. So they keep John on a hot mic for the most part, right? Okay, so I'm gonna just share with you a few minutes of Red Bull Stratos and Felix's jump. You ready for this? Yeah, here we go.

There's a world out there. The door has opened. The door has opened. The door has opened. George open. George open. Okay, I'm 26. Move seat to the rear capsule. Great, great, Felix! Is that Felix? That's Felix. Great Felix, not sure what you're saying doesn't matter anyway. You got about 30% chance of making it 10,000 feet,

and then about a 5% chance of your parachute actually work He's probably saying Decided against this I'm 27 but lays into the door threshold. I'm scared, sir. I'm really scared. I would be. I did not realize what a highly fuzz.

52 miles is a lot higher than 51. I have 48 slapped the seat forward. Fly the seat forward. Fly the seat forward. I'm already pissing my feet. I'm already pissing my feet. I'm already pissing my feet. I'm already pissing my words? I'm already pissing my face, but I'm just listening to it. I'm really seat belt. Release the seat belt.

Listen to this. Just the manner in which he's talking through these steps, right? Yeah. They didn't have to put John Kiddinger talking about these steps. They could have put two guys' girls, whatever. They could have put them there talking about, you know, there's Felix, he's getting ready to jump out.

As you can see, he's moving the seat forward so he can get his body suit right out of the box. Da da da da da. But they left John Kiddinger walking through these steps because they knew that no matter even listening to it, it sounds really fucking scary. When you tell someone to push your seat forward, outside the capsule, and then release your seat belt.

Yeah. 32 miles in the air. when you tell someone to push your seat forward outside the capsule and then release your seat belt. 32 miles in the air. So now he loses communication. I'll just wait till balloon deflate. I am 29, getting released to see Bill. So now he loses communication. Right? He loses the ability to talk. That's good. Okay. Now boy, that's good.

Go ahead John. Now the boy we're all getting paid today. Whether you make it or not, checks in the bank. Good job, John. Slap forward into the resposition. The resposition. Why do you respite for a minute?

No, you can't respite now. You can't respite now. You're committed. You're halfway out of the capsule seat belts off. He's telling you to slide into the resposition. The resposition. He's telling you to slide into the rest position. Yeah, the rest position Well a little bit further forward so we can check your shoe

You're forward. Check your shoes. Oh shoot. You shouldn't you have done that before. Yeah. No, you can't check it all the sudden now or rest. We're not sure we put the bird. Yeah, we need to check something real quick. Purple bag in the back there. Hit the rust button and let us check your shoe real quick. Behind the passenger seat. See if there's something looks like a book bag with a couple straps. There's not okay. Let's move on. Stand up. Stand up. Into the rest of the show. Step to the right. Just go ahead and jump.

We're gonna turn off the ground camera angle. Just go ahead and jump Felix. Let's see what happens. Yeah. We'll just go how you buy Your shoots okay, Felix Shoot and technically is check your parishes or not boy Good to know I repeat Your shoots have not deployed.

Hey, John, it's a big relief down here and all of us. We had Billy put a pair of shit together this morning. Oh, guys, I'm not sure, I don't know. I don't know. I had my toy story lunch box in the pair of shooting the other hand, and I don't know. I can't remember all that much. You guys asked me to do do a lot of things. You had two cameras and then you said, hey, can you put Felix's shoe on and I was like, is that you want you want lunch?

What? Did you say shoot or lunch? I'm not sure. Did you say shoot or Woody? I'm not sure. Oh, sorry, I really like Pixar movies. How's Felix doing up there? You should ask him if I put the shoot on before he goes Move forward They slide that one in there. They're like 29 a B Move forward so 29 a B before it's so

Checked for it before so we can check your shoot. Oh, thank god, Billy. Thank God. You're okay You're sure I'm not a good It's actually on yeah, Billy is gonna keep his job. Oh That's a relief Item 32 verified verify, cutaway knife. Handle strap is attached in knife and proposition. Say Rodger if it's so. Cutaway knife. I guess if...

Chest. I guess he had cutaway the shoot that died or something. Like it was going crazy, then he'd have to cut it away. That's scary to think about, man. That's so crazy. Shit. That face plate heat is on me. It's a. That's his own and you got a bit like Okay, here we go. I'm 34

Okay, here we go. It's just getting real This is so scary. I know, I'm feeling nervous. Do you read me feelings on the green elections? Do you read me? No. Hey, God! This is why I do anything.

I need to discharge my phone. I'll go ahead and unplug this one. But there's like a lecture. It's an extension course. A bunch of other stuff attached to it. Oh, it's communication. Wow. I wish I had known that before. You guys should label it. Oh, they are label. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. You want to talk to Felix? Okay, let me plug this back in here. Look at that. They rebooted real soon Felix give me a short count Okay, so I'm gonna just move on he's like Felix give me a shortcut cuz you know he can now he can't now like now Felix is not responding right so he's like

Give me a short count. Felix doesn't respond. He's like okay, never mind. Yeah, let's just keep going No, what you can't see is it Felix actually gives a thumbs up so he can here But you can hear him breathing. I don't understand why it just doesn't talk. Maybe he's so shitless scared It makes the scared shitless. Yeah, either that or they just doesn't talk. Maybe he's so shitless scared me so scared shitless Yeah, either that or they just have a breathing track on like they're just playing an audio set KC dot They just played the breath. Yeah, well, he was alive for a we thought he was alive Sounded like he was alive

Guys I press this little button over here. Sounds like someone's breathing. Oh he's dead. Oh that's really that's so sad. I just want to let you know the coolers out of Mountain Dew. Oh wrong time. Okay I'll talk later. I'll put it on the list of things to do. Just connect both Austin supply hoses.

That's when she gets real. Just connect it. Give me a thumbs up if they're disconnected. I don't think so connected. We're not connected. We're not connected. We're not connected. We're not connected. We're not connected. We're not connected. We're not connected. We're not connected. We're not connected. The OS is connected. Oh, it's real X disconnect.

We got things to do down here. I got dinner at 730. I got dinner reservations at Waffle House at 730. Can you get on that? I appreciate it. That a boy. That a boy. Stand up on the exterior step.

Keep your head down. Release the helmet tie down strap. Whoa release the strap These cameras And our guardian angel will take care of you Right guardian angels got And super right guardian angels got to know about that We're about all that shoot knocks shit. We're just we were just checking a few things down here No one gets paid unless you do it

Your wife even said go ahead and jump She said the chick clear don't worry about it So now he steps out. If anybody watch this he steps out or he sees out already actually he's now got one foot on. Okay, you want me to translate that for you. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. What? What? It's in your heart. Holy shit. What? It's really high. Sometimes you have to be really high to realize how small you are.

Oh, okay. Okay. All right. It's no one giant leap from the sky. But okay. I'm not sure they're going to write that one in in this three books Felix, but yeah, good try buddy Okay, well enough of the small talk go ahead and jump In meanwhile, they're like okay great buddy. Whatever you said come on hurry up. Yeah, do it

It's causing us $10,000 a minute to run the satellite broadcast It's gotten us $10,000 a minute to run this satellite broadcast. I'm going over. Oh, that was... So is he up in a balloon? He's up in a balloon. A balloon, like a hot air balloon. A hot air balloon. Okay.

It's a weather balloon. They put a weather balloon and they put us like a, imagine like a space capsule. Like this, the kind you've seen the, the initial astronauts went in. So that kind of, that kind of shape, they stuff them in there. It took about five hours to get up to where he was, right, five hours of climbing, because the higher you get the thinner the atmosphere and the less lift the balloon has,

you know, stuff. So when he got up to that, I think it was 32,000 kilometers or something like that, which is whatever it is, it's really high up. And, you know, but he wasn't really necessarily at the edge of space. He was just really high up. Now, Red Bull made it sound like he was at the edge of space,

but I'm gonna show you an example of why that's not true here in a second, okay? Okay. So, he gets up there and then they start this procedure of disconnecting all the stuff because he's essentially harnessed into this thing. Yeah, okay. Okay, with a full space suit on,

because it's so incredibly cold up there and there is no oxygen at that level like zero, right? Like, you know, 0.000% oxygen. That if he was to be exposed at that height, even if his suit ripped, right, it's possible that his skin would just bubble because there's no oxygen and it's so freezing cold. Wow, right? It's like certain death. It's an incredibly dangerous thing that this guy did. And to his credit, he actually made it. What happens after he says, I'm going home now. That's the last thing he says. He says it's time for me to go home now, right?

Which he's a pretty chilling thing to say. Yeah. Because you could die and you're saying, you know, it's time for me to go home now. He jumps out of the capsule and he immediately within like, this is like a five minute free fall. He immediately within a minute starts going into an uncontrolled spin. He is spinning like this, he has no control

because the atmosphere is so thin, he cannot get dragged, right? So it's like putting your arms out in I don't even know I mean, I don't even know what we would compare it to right. It's just you there's no there's no particles up there So you can't put your hands out and get drag so there's no control So he is just spinning and spinning and spinning and spinning to the point where he passes out. Oh my god Meanwhile, this is all on fucking camera because of course they have an angle of everything. So what you're watching on TV is they go from his helmet cam,

right? First of all, there's a bunch of cameras inside and outside this capsule. The cameras outside the capsule capture him in four different angles, standing up, and then falling off the thing, right? It's an incredibly powerful moment when he just kind of falls face first off into the atmosphere. But then they go from his helmet cam when he starts spinning

that kind of goes out to they've got him on a little, like an incredibly powerful, like I know what you call, like a telescope camera. And they've've got them and even though he's small on the TV You can see that he's spinning out of control And I mean when I say spinning I mean fucking spinning this guy's like a fidget spinner spinning around in circles so fast It's hard to decipher what is his legs and what are his head? The dizziness and the loss of oxygen and yeah, so now we'll listen for a couple more minutes because just Here okay, so now he's jumping right now. He's going So now listen for a couple more minutes because it's just here okay

so now he's jumping right now he's going you can hear people clapping why they're clapping I have no idea like this and he just started the danger as part actually did it but shit did it yeah I did it

I'm pretty proud of him. Listen to how labored his breathing is. 446 miles per hour. 600 miles per hour. Holy shit, Miles Browr. At 800, he's breaking, he's breaking Mock. Mock 1, he's literally going faster than sound. I mean, people really had to have thought maybe he could die. Oh, oh, I see.

Yeah, I think there's no question. Please let him die. I think there's no question. Please let him die. I think there's no question that a lot of people have had like odds were 50-50 that this guy would survive. The best planning. You can only plan so much for something like this. If a pinhole in your suit, and you freeze the death almost instantaneously, it's crazy.

Or he spins out of control like this. And I mean your body can only handle so many G's your brain literally goes into your you know Stick to your skull and it's like right you died job job you're spinning out of control 29 and D so already 729 miles per hour Spin that is faster than a 747 travels in the air. He's going down. Yeah. Yeah, and spinning and spinning Stable well, he's he kind of starts to like stable himself when I say stable. He's spinning in a slower rate I'm calling you. You're fucking eating it. Someone help me. I want to control.

I can't wait to do this. This is insane. I mean, Felix is insane. How do you do that? How do you do that? Do you see what happened to Felix? Yeah, Felix is like, you know, living the high life and Austria or whatever. Now let's listen to Felix? Yeah, Felix is like, you know, living the high life in Austria or whatever. Now let's listen to what? Best of Felix. Let's listen to what Neil deGrasse Tyson. Oh, okay.

Neil deGrasse High has to say, Oh, let's have him. DeGrasse High. You ever know, show? DeGrasse High, the Canadian, like 90210? No. You don't remember that? DeGrasse High?

I don't. You don't remember DeGrasse High? No. Oh my God, on PBS? No. Somebody please write it and tell me they remember DeGrasse High, the 90210 of Canada, which was a incredibly boring show.

It was like all the same kind of things they would talk about on Save By The Balance of like, drugs and sex and rock and roll and why you shouldn't be doing it. It was basically a PSA for Canada, but it was a good, you know, it was a boring show to watch on PBS. Okay, here's what Neil deGras tyson has to say about this particular jump

about two millimeters dude who jumped out of a perfect the outside you got a huge dude who jumped out of a perfectly good balloon corrupt off programs to bring you this important message oh what is going on I don't. And that dude who jumped out of a really good balloon. I know what happened. Um, but since I feel like Felix, Felix Bumgardner, uh, he would have been about two millimeters above the surface of space jump. Now, you know, I don't, he wants to, I don't have a problem if he does it, but the honesty

of it would greatly diminish what I think people thought he was actually doing. And not only that, they made shorted photographs him standing there with a really wide angle lens, which curves horizontal lines. So in the photo, you see this curvature of Earth's surface and he's like, wow, he's in space. Look at that. No, he's not. At that height, you don't see the curvature of the Earth. If you are two millimeters above this beach ball, he just does. I beg the differ a little bit on that because I've sometimes been in a plane. And I have seen the curvature of the earth. Yes. Okay. So, okay, I'm with you on this,

right? And I can understand why there is some confusion about this. But there is a whole universe of people that don't believe that Felix Bummagunder did any of this. They think that it was a complete fake. There are a whole conspiracy theory. Why does everyone on fucking Earth take everything and just ruin it with their stupid bullshit? I mean, honestly, why can't, can't we believe in anything? You know, I mean, I realize you don't believe in Santa Claus.

Okay, I get that part, right? But do you have to, like, do you have to ruin everything? It starts with Santa. With your stupid bullshit. It all started with Santa. Every all these kids can't take it. They're also sad that Santa Claus wasn't true. They think that everything must be,

oh, yeah. Maybe that's why you should not tell my kids about Santa. Maybe I should just tell them the truth. It's my dad Right it's my fucking money There's gonna music get off close to music that tells us time to wrap up the show It's good to be back in the studios. You can notice by my tan Yeah, it was a third degree burn four days ago.

This is gonna even down. Hi, Myrish, so that's how it works. You get a third degree burn and then it evens out. There you go. Join us on Fireside for live recordings. Go and download the Fireside Chat app. You'll notice it. It's got, you can't miss it.

It's a social audio app. You can't miss it. There's a couple of other FireSides on the app, but it's the one with Mark Cuban's face on it. You'll notice I'll tell you more about that and an upcoming show about Mark super excited Siding stuff going on at TCB DCB ACB. I don't know if you notice my little Vane mark earlier. I got donated blood. Oh, did? And to everybody out there, I encourage you. Donate blood.

So I gave blood. Yeah, I like that. That's a non-political thing we can do. It's a little sore. But the funniest was that they put a little cotton ball on it and then after I gave the blood. Yeah. And then they put the bandaid on it.

But then they put a gigantic red tape. Wow. Round it. Why? Which I'm thinking was maybe like the marketing people. Oh, the red cross? You know, something that people would be like, why do you have that on your arm?

Because I donated blood. Interesting. Oh, I thought I was very interesting. Yeah, look at those red cross people. I'm going to put another bandaid back on it. Let's get you a glass of OJ over the, over the brakes. You don't pass out. I've cookie before our big interview. I ate band-aid back on it. Let's get you a glass of OJ over the break. So you don't pass out. I've cooked before our big interview.

I ate a cookie after I'd donated it. They have them there. That's what you have to do to get your blood sugar back up. A couple of times I've been to the doctor at physicals and they've taken like, you know, I ain't some blood for whatever this and that and the other thing. And I don't feel well afterwards. I'm like super fussy and cranky

and I feel light-headed and it's just miserable. But giving blood, the 15 minutes of discomfort as well worth all Yeah, it was like I'm gonna say donate blood Do get the facts do the thing. Let's get the fuck out of this whole bullshit. Let's stop arguing listen to science recall your doctor Talk to him make an independent decision, but make it on based on what's best for you and those around you You know, I don't want to talk politics it's too fucking boring. No.

Yeah we'll leave that up to Roger Stone. Yeah. We'll leave that up to Roger Stone. So here's what you do you go to tcbpodcast.com that's where you go you find out more about Chrissy and I you can read all the show notes you can listen to the audio you can watch all the video all from one place that's also where you can go to get in touch with us on Instagram, YouTube via email 470-5848-449, is where you can leave us a text message, or if you want to,

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Follow us at the commercial break on Instagram. Each episode is written and produced by Brian Green, co-hosted by Chrissy Holy, with I'm going to be a little bit more careful. I'm going to be a little bit more careful. I'm going to be a little bit more careful. I'm going to be a little bit more careful. I'm going to be a little bit more careful. I'm going to be a little bit more careful. I'm going to be a little bit more careful. I'm going to be a little bit more careful. I'm going to be a little bit more careful.

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