The Commercial Break - She'd Be Open to It (Once A Year)!

Episode Date: March 8, 2024

Bryan & Krissy go down the rabbit hole of relationship deal-breakers! Sharp tongue bryan Missing your flight for starbucks It’s the train ride for me Relationship dealbreakers Miscommunications Extreme cheapskate marriages? Jeff’s gonna have the time of his life! The Beast of Howell Mill! The Naked Boat Seeking Sister Wives Krissy’s like a moth to a flame! The Ultimate Ick: podcasting LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us   212.433.3TCB text or leave us a voicemail Watch TCB on YouTube Creator & Producer : Bryan Green Hosts: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Producer: Christina A.  Producer: Gustavo B. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Order up for Damien. Hey, how did your doctor's appointment go by the way? Did you ask about Rebelsys? Actually, I'm seeing my doctor later today. Did you say Rebelsys? My dad's been talking about Rebelsys. Rebelsys? Really?

Yeah, he says it's a pill that's That's right. Did you know it's also covered by most private insurance plans? Well, I'll definitely be asking my doctor if Rebelsys is right for me. Rebelsys, ask your doctor doctor if Rebelsys is right for me. Rebelsys, ask your doctor or visit Rebelsys.ca.

Order up for Rebelsys. The way you treat young girls when you hit the jack. On this episode of the commercial break. If Jeff liked to dress up like a ballerina and then have you walk them around the house with a leash right then I think you probably say I'd be open to it you'd be open to it well you learn something new every day about your partner and now I'm even more curious about what's going on at that house I you know might indulge that once a year or something. What's it you think? The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Ha ha ha, best to you, Kristen. Best to you, bro. That's what happens when you try and get smart with your words.

You get all tongue tied, tongue tied and twisted. I have this routine that I'll go through a lot of times before the commercial break to make sure that my tongue stays sharp, since I do have a lazy tongue. What they call a lazy tongue. Let's do one a sharp tongue. Yeah, so you know what I do? You ready for my warm up?

Titular tatatatatata Waka flaka flame titular tatatatata Waka flaka flame and I'll do that for like 30 minutes in the morning on the way home from driving the kids to school Oh, that's still doesn't work. It doesn't work. Yeah, it does not work. I should go similins. Yes similins That makes sure my S's are strong. esses are strong. Hey Chrissy. Hey Brian I'm gonna tell you a story. I'm gonna tell you like I'm gonna give you the recap version of the story And then I want your opinion and then we're gonna talk about this At length. Okay, man goes to airport with wife man and wife are not on time for the plane.

They are rushing to get to the plane. Wife says, I want my Starbucks coffee before we get on the plane. Man says, we don't have enough time. Woman says, I don't give a shit. I'm getting my Starbucks. We have plenty of time. I'll, we'll get to the plane on time.

Man says, get to the plane at your own peril. I'm leaving. I'm going to the plane. Leaves his wife at the Starbucks to get on the plane wife misses flight count your flippin blessings darling, so Astrid and I were having this discussion yesterday. I want your opinion, but I'll give you mine first I'm gonna mansplain it to your first I don't agree with the guy would never leave Astrid at an airport.

That would never happen, because I know how much trouble I would be in if that happened. Plus we have a lot of children and I need her help managing those children. But I would never leave a loved one at an airport. I just think that's a really shitty thing to do. No matter how angry I was at their time management, but he was correct.

He was right because she did miss the flight. So they actually didn't have time to get the Starbucks. So in my opinion, he's an asshole, but he's a right asshole. He did the right thing. I mean, he was right, not he did the right thing, he was right about the situation. They obviously didn't have time for Starbucks.

Who says I don't care about missing the plane, I need my Starbucks? A woman who gets left at the airport, a person who gets left at the airport. That's as simple as that. Not even a woman, a person. I know people like this. I know. Yes, I do. Esther and I were talking about it. And it's like, if you were, if the Starbucks is right there and you're waiting

for your seat to be called, if you're like E, first of all, there's a Starbucks at like every, every corner of the airport, at least this airport that we have at the Atlanta airport. But you're right. It's like they have a coffee shop or one of those little vending machines or a place where you can get caffeine at every corner. Also coffee on the plane. Yeah, that's true too.

I mean granted that coffee isn't all that great, but who cares? If you like really need coffee, just put a bunch of cream in it. It'll taste the same as any Starbucks. Cream, sugar, a little jelly donut. I'm not sure what they put in that Starbucks shit, but the truth is you don't need a coffee that bad

that you're gonna miss your flight. No, that miss your flight. Yes. So now you wanna hear the actual story? So then also you're gonna be all caffeinated up and pissed off, you missed the flight. Listen, I would need the poop or a medium. Why are you like, are you just like, ah, thank God

I've got my Starbucks. I've got my Starbucks. I've got my Starbucks. Missed the flight, but... Sorry, I didn't make it to Seattle, but I got my Starbucks. Like those, you know, the announcements. I'm gonna go get some Starbucks. They're boarding us right now. I'm gonna go get some Starbucks right now I'll be back in 17 to 20 minutes. Tell them to hold the flight They're gonna close the doors I'll be back in two doors. I'll be back in two minutes. Tell them to hold on. Who needs Starbucks that bad?

No, and you know, two a lot of times they'll start paging the people that are missing. Oh, I got, I was paged once. I've been paged before too. I was paged once and they actually were pulling the thing back, like this is way back before, I think it's before 9-11 actually. Okay.

So they were pulling that little, you know, the little whatever that is, a little sky ramp or whatever it is, they were pulling it back. The doors were closed. They had been calling me for 30 minutes and I was at a bar too drunk to realize they were calling me. My friend and I were at a bar too. Yeah. Until the guy that I was sitting with having a drink with, I just met my best friend in the world, you know I'm saying and he was like man, they've been calling this dude for a while and I was like That's me. Yeah Brian Green Delta now Delta paging Brian Green Brian green you're an asshole everybody's waiting for you Brian Green And I was like, oh man that guy's got the same name

That and that is me. That's me. I gotta get going got the same name. That is me. That's me. I got to get going. And I've never been stared down like that in my entire life. When I got on that flight, I was like, oh yeah, people are pissed. Way in the back of the plane. I had to walk through almost every aisle and people were just there. They were shaking their heads, throwing me daggers. Luckily I was too drunk to care. I slept it off during the flight. The worst headache when we got to care. I was gonna say you were too drunk to care. I slept it off during the flight. The worst headache when we got to Atlanta, worst headache. But that was a different time and place.

Now you got to be there on time. There is no time, no time. Like Kelly Kopowski said in Save by the Bell in the episode, the generation defining episode, I'm on speed, No time! No time! I've got no time! Yeah, that's how that whole situation is crazy to me. It's nuts. Do you want to hear the story?

Yes. Okay, I'll read you the story. This is actually from a Reddit post, by the way, so he even knows it was true at the end of the day. Okay. Starbucks is awfully expensive these days, but it may have cost one man his marriage. An anonymous traveler revealed on Reddit that he recently left his wife holding the bag

and her skinny no foam latte in an airport departure lounge after she snuck away from the boarding gate for a quick coffee shortly before their transcontinental- Transcontinental flight! Oh my god. Oh my god. You- I'm sorry, but this human is dumb. That's my opinion! Like don't fuck around fuck around and find out like Chrissy and I just figured out was a cool saying from 2007 she found out she found out the shock and confusion posted only days ago to the two hot takes subreddit has already real

Then nearly 8,000 comments many users were unequivocally supportive of the deserting dad Who was determined to get to the East Coast to see his daughter off to college, even if it meant the flight of the century with his little wife left behind. The 47 year old man from the Pacific Northwest began by, this is not me by the way, began explaining that the traveling with his 43 year old

wife is not a great experience, quote unquote. He describes himself as a type A person, and while his wife is the opposite. I have to organize everything and make sure we get there when we need to get there, especially when traveling. My wife is the opposite. Very go with the flow, and we will get there when we get there. The couple have been together for more than a decade. The daughter is from the man's previous marriage.

She is now in college on the other side of the country country and the couple was going to travel there to see her. The man explained that he had been on edge leading up to the couple's most recent trip because last year's his wife's antics caused them to miss their original flight to visit their daughter. She slept in after he tried to wake her up five or six times and then decided to take a shower, make coffee coffee eat cereal as he anxiously Awaited to get to the airport by the time his wife was finally ready They made it to the and when they made it to the gate the flight had taken off without them I mean you're gonna know that before you make it to the gate honestly if your flight's at like 1235 as the as the plane

Already left at 1235. No, so you already know that you're not making that flight, right? They missed out on two days They had planned to spend with their daughter and he was determined to spend as much time as possible with his girl. This time, due to the last quote, due to the last airport mishap, I wanted to make sure I told her we needed to leave extra

early as to not miss the flight again. He said, noting that he still had to push his wife to move along. This time the couple made it to their gate with some time to spare, which eased the man's mind, but annoyed his wife, who continued to complain about having to wait to board the plane. Well, I hate waiting to board the plane, but I like to time it just right, as my priority is being called. Yeah, you know, listen, I used to be a get there way early kind of person. Then the more that I traveled,

the more I realized that was unnecessary. I do not need to be the first person at the gate. And now with children, so for a long time I was also time it so I get there when they're boarding or five or 10 minutes before. Early, right. And even if I get there early,

I walk around the airport. I don't want to stay there. And, you know, because I get anxious when everyone starts standing up. There's no defined line to everybody's just kind of funneled, funneling into that, that ticket taking. You're so right about this.

It's like an anxious experience all around until you get on the plane and get settled. So for me, let me go when I can just walk right on the plane, get settled, put my head against the window and not be bothered by anybody. Please don't talk to me. So his wife's annoyed and she continued to complain about having to wait for the, to board the plane.

The couple made it onto their first flight without any issues and landed with less than an hour until their connecting flight. Oh, so they missed the connecting flight. The second gate was far away, so the couple had to take multiple trains. This is in Atlanta, I guarantee this flying through Atlanta. They arrived at their departure area

with just 15 minutes to spare. His wife then decided she wanted a cup of coffee, but refused his offer to buy her something at the little market next to their gate, insisting she needed Starbucks coffee, a train ride away. Oh, the train ride away. I told her we couldn't do that. We didn't have enough time, he recounted,

remembering that his wife claimed that there was enough time and would go by herself if he wouldn't join her. I tried to discourage her, but she was determined. She walked away at a brisk pace and said she would be back right in time. 15 minutes went by and the plane started boarding but his wife had not returned. I called my wife hoping she was nearby, he said. She did not answer.

They called a few groups and then they called ours. In a panic I tried to call my wife three times in a row. Finally on the last call she answered and said that she was on her way. It was a long line and she had to wait a bit. I told her that they were almost done boarding the plane and she needed to hurry up. The man claimed that he waited at the gate until the crew member told her that they were almost done boarding the plane and she needed to hurry up. The man claimed that he waited at the gate until the crew member told him that the door needed to be closed in two minutes, meaning he needed to get on this flight or get off the ramp. He insisted that he tried to plead with the airline worker, but was told the plane could not be held up any longer due to one person's lateness.

So I boarded the plane. His wife called him a few minutes later after he settled into her seat. She told me I needed to tell them to let me off the plane to be with her. And I said, no, it's not fair to do this again. I told you we didn't have time, but you decided to go anyway. He told his wife to buy a ticket for the next flight

and left to enjoy the weekend with his daughter. And speaking with his wife over the weekend, the subject hardly came up. He said, I thought maybe she realized it was her fault and just wanted to drop it. Once the couple was reunited, back at home, he realized just how wrong he was. Of course she wasn't going to let this go. Are you fucking crazy? Yeah.

We're now home and she hasn't talked to me. I mean, I have to say, I guess I probably would not get onto the plane and leave Jeff, but I would be super pissed. Super pissed. Super duper pissed. Super pissed. We are now home and she hasn't talked to me since the trip over a week ago and she's insisting I'm an asshole. I stopped being the caretaker for my partner after the first time we missed the flight. One redditor sympathized admitting that one time he left his wife behind

after they had failed to make a connection to catch a 10 day cruise. Oh, that's even worse, because the cruise ship certainly waiting for this whole videos about that. Really? Yes. He's never been late again, the person on Reddit said.

Sit down and tell your wife that you love her and you cherish her, but there's ways she disrespects you. Ways that she disrespects your desire to be punctual is just too much. Well, and it was disrespectful to the daughter too. Of course it was. Tell her from now on you're gonna make-

Everything's topsy-turvy, you're having to recall hotels called rebook flights, I mean, that's just rude. It's way inconvenient. If you are in the Starbucks line and you realize- Yes. You're gonna miss the flight, just get out of the line. Just get out of the line, Just get out of the line. Just go, go.

Yeah, you know. If it's a train ride away and they're boarding the flight, you are not going to make it. It doesn't matter which airport you're at, or what kind of train, or how many people are in line. Don't. Or go the coffee. Of course, it's not that fucking important.

You can live without coffee. They have coffee on the plane, plenty of caffeine everywhere around. He was right. Let me buy you one of those Starbucks in a can, like poop in a can shit, whatever it is. I side with the sentiment here, though I do not side with the action,

I would have never left Astrid. But Astrid is also not like this human being. Like I don't have to worry that Astrid's gonna wanna make some break for it five minutes before we have to get on a flight and ruin the whole vacation. Like, I'm just not worried about that ever happening with Astrid. No, same with Jeff. Yeah, we're like two rather pragmatic human beings.

We understand that, you know, 15 minutes before the flight starts boarding, you should probably either be really close to the gate or on your way to the gate. You shouldn't be heading in the opposite direction to get anything at all. Even if it's one of those Fred, you know, one of those wonderful burgers they serve down there. It's what is it? I don't know what it is. Um, anyway, um, the this, uh, H and F. Oh, right.

Home and fridge. Home and fridge. Uh, and those are burgers to miss a flight over, but I still wouldn't do it. No. The sentiment here I 1000% agree with. I really do, especially if you had a lifetime of this. And I dated someone who was just like this. I dated someone who literally dragged herself

through an airport. I had to drag her through an airport to get on a flight on time. Oh! And it was, I think that it was just about, I think it's a little bit of entitlement is what it is. Like I'm entitled to have my Starbucks and make the flight. I think I can do it.

And if I can't, then they're gonna hold the plane for me. No, they're not gonna hold the plane for you. No. You are disrupting an, like 300 people's vacations, getting home, emergencies, deaths, funerals, whatever it is, business trips, you're gonna inconvenience everybody so they can hold the flight for you for an extra 15 minutes

while you figure out where the fucking Starbucks is, be like the rest of us and suffer through a flight in misery with nothing but goldfish and a Coca-Cola this big. The small Coca-Cola, they don't even give you the whole can. Yeah, I mean, I'm thinking about it, but if that was the serious issue with a relationship that I was in, I think I would just refuse to travel with that person. Well, 1,000% Yeah, I would say like, you book your flight, I book mine, I'll see you there. I have, yeah.

This is where, this is what, when I'm gonna arrive. Yes. Hopefully you're there too. Hopefully you're there too. If not, meet gonna arrive. Yes. Hopefully you're there too. Hopefully you're there too. If not, meet me later. When you get there. Listen, this is the whole point of today's show. The whole topic of today's show is deal breakers

in serious relationships. And this to me is, it could be a top three, which is disrespect for other people in general. I don't think this is about time management as it's framed in the story. I think it's about being respectful of everybody else's time around you, right? If you're constantly late,

if people have to wake you up five times, if they have to push you out of bed, if they have to get you somewhere, it's not about time management, which may on the surface seem in my opinion. It's really about entitlement and disrespect and control and that to me if I had a partner like that I wouldn't last 10 minutes even though I did last for a couple years. It would cause problems. It would be a big deal. No, no. Hell nah. So let's think about

the other things in relationships Chrissy that are big deal fucking breakers. Like things that if Jeff was, you don't think you could survive with Jeff. But before you do that, before you do that, I'd like to take a break. Okay. We'll be back. Well, thank the baby Jesus, Brian took a breath,

and now I will use this opportunity to let you know that we've got a brand new phone number. That's right, it's 212-433-3TCB and you can text us anytime you want. Or you can call or leave us a voicemail and we might just use your message on the show. Once Brian gets through all the messages he missed last year, of course. Anyway, you can also find and DM us on Instagram at the commercial break and on TikTok at TCB podcast. And of course, all of our audio and video is easily found on TCBpodcast.com.

Now I'm going to thank G one more time that we have sponsors, so thank G and here they are. It's after bedtime, the kids are asleep and the moms are out to play. We're Dina and Kristen, the duo behind the Instagram account, Big Little Feelings. I'm Dina, I'm a child therapist and mom of two who nerds out on all things neurobiology and psychology. And Kristen is a parent coach who wrangles three kids on a daily basis here to give it to us like it is.

We weren't meant to do this parenting thing alone. Consider after bedtime, your village. Follow after bedtime with Big Little Feelings on the Odyssey app or wherever you get your village. Follow after bedtime with big little feelings on the Odyssey app or wherever you get your podcasts. Are you know they say that like money issues are the number one cause of divorce, which I actually don't agree with that. I think miscommunication is probably the number one reason

why people get divorced as a guy who has been through one. I think it's all about miscommunication I think you can figure anything out as long as you're communicating about it right including money and finances and hard times I think hard times financially bring extra stress on the relationship man. Do we know that? But I also get that Oftentimes I think one person hides in the corner and the other person's trying to deal with it or vice versa or whatever. So I don't necessarily agree, but that's what the so-called experts say.

Who they say, whoever they are, who are these they people, Chrissy, they're always telling us what to do. They... They're editors. You're the redditors. That's who they are. That's who they are. Well, it depends, I think, on the type of money problems. Give the reds. That's who they are. That's who they are.

Well, it depends, I think, on the type of money problems. I mean, it all comes down to, like, is somebody lying about what there's been? That's it. Miscommunication, right? Well, I would lie, I think, is more than miscommunication. I'd like to go miscommunication. I'm not going to give somebody the benefit of the doubt. Yeah, it is.

It's miscommunication, mistrust, right? Miscommunication, I think breeds mistrust too. But yeah, you're right about this. Like, are they lying and spending their money doing something else? Like gambling, drug addiction, prostitutes, penis pumps, you know, all those kinds of things that really suck your account dry.

QVC as my mom likes to do. QVC. Oh yeah, QVC. Yeah, but I can see how money and miscommunication around money or lying distrust around money is a could be a huge thing so, you know If do you and Jeff generally see eye-to-eye on money and where you spend it? We do. Yeah, I'm very fortunate Jeff and I generally see eye-to-eye on

I was thanks. Yeah, I asked her and I do too because when you don't have any money to spend there's nothing to disagree about really I mean, it's like well, we can't spend money on that. Yeah. Nope. No problem. Yeah But I do need my I do need a new penis pump honey because the old ones Yeah, I'd like to get a new one every month. I want to make sure that I keep my dick high and tight You know what I'm saying literally high and tight Yeah, I think, I think, this segment sponsored by penis pump. My personal endorsement.

Yeah, I think, you know, when you get into a serious relationship and you're starting to co-mingle living situations and financing and one of the other people is, you know, adding into the pot, financially, you know, everybody knows you get into that serious relationship. I could never be with someone that was like a penny pinching, penny countering kind of human being

because I just don't see, I see money like water. It flows into your hand, but you can't, the harder you try and grab it, the more it goes away. Right? Yes. Yes, true. into your hand, but the harder you try and grab it, the more it goes away, right? Yes, true. So in my case, imagine like a leaky faucet that's dripping every three or four minutes, like once, boop, boop, boop.

That's kind of how my money situation happens. It's really hard to grab onto because it's never coming out all that fast, right? But I think of money as something that you really shouldn't try and hold on too tight to, because then you, I don't know, you start to treat it like a possession. It is a possession, but you start to treat it like a possession. I see money as energy, energy as exchange between two people. I use my energy to make money when they decide to pay us, and then I give that money to somebody else for their energy when they make a little trinket or

whatever, but you know, Bud Light, I don't know, whatever. It's an exchange of energy. Yeah, I'm And then I give that money to somebody else for their energy when they make a little trinket or whatever But you know Bud Light. I don't know whatever. It's an exchange of energy Yeah, I'm saying that like somebody has to make that Bud Light, you know Yes, somebody has to do those things in order to get the Bud Light can into my hands Yeah, and that's and that's your opinion and you know, that's the thing everybody has to find their person like we've done shows before We talk about the like extreme everybody has to find their person. Like we've done shows before where we talk about the like extreme cheatskates.

Yeah. And you know, it seems like those people have found their other person that believes in it too. So there you go. Yeah, most of those people seem like they're really on the edge of divorce, except for a couple of them. You're right. There have been a couple who definitely like teamed up

to make life miserable for both of each other. But I just can never, ever live like that. Like even even if I had no money like I do now, I don't know that I would go like asking for extra scraps of meat from the local, you know, Mexican restaurant, right? Out of the back, you know, go in dumpster diving and stuff like that. Just not me. It's not me. Unless I needed that food to survive for my family, like literally needed, I was starving, right? Then I think I would do that.

But like, you know, what was that one lady was trying to do a wedding for her daughter and she was going to the thrift stores and like negotiating with them to bring the wedding dress down to five cents or something like that. That's just to me feels, it doesn't feel great, right? It feels like you're just being too crazed about money. Like anything that, I guess anything you get too obsessed

about it, if you had a partner that was an extreme cheapskate, do you think you could survive that? No. No. No. No, I know you, that wouldn't be, that wouldn't be. But I do like to have a budget and kind of stick to it. And I like to, you know, say, okay know you, that wouldn't be, that wouldn't be. No, but I do like to have a budget and kind of stick to it. And I like to, you know, say, okay, well this is beyond our means.

And so we'll save for that, something like that. Okay. But yeah, but I don't, I'm not, I, an extreme cheapskate. No. I like to have a budget, you know, when I, I don't have anything to spend, but you know, when I have a, I just feel good about putting a budget down. But I do like that too.

Like a generalized budget, right? What about sex? Not seeing eye to eye on sex. No, I think that could be a deal breaker in the long run. I think it could be a deal breaker. I think, again, communication. I think if the two of you had dissimilar sexual styles, like if Jeff liked to dress up like a ballerina

and then have you walk him around the house with a leash, right then I think you'd probably say- I'd be open to it. You'd be open to it. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Well, you learn something new every day about your partner and now I'm even more curious about what's going on at that house.

I you know might indulge that once a year. Is ballerina show pony day get out the riding crop. Give me a full ballerina skirt and a hint of saloon and I'm on board. I'm imagining. I'm a personint of Saloon and I'm on board. I'm imagining. I'm an open-minded person. I know you are. I'm open-minded too, actually. I am no prude when it comes to sex. I'm cool with whatever.

As long as we talk it out before... Exactly. If we're going to go to the extreme, let's talk it out beforehand. I've been in some wacky and wild situations. And some of them came up on me and I thought I wasn't okay with it It was like could we have talked about this beforehand right like you know I'm saying yeah All these guys back to like I don't want to be pegged unless we've talked about that right, but you know am I up for it?

Yeah Once a year right Chris he said once you're on a special occasion kids birthday or something like that Hey, honey, it's pegging night. How cool is it? All right. I don't know what to be, you know, where I get to extremes is like, you know, sister wives, cuckolding, stuff like that.

I'm like, ah, I'm gonna pass on all that stuff. Right. Yeah. Do you and Jeff cook? Is there any cucking going on over there? Or just edging? No cucking, just edging. There's no clucking. There's no clucking.

There's no chickens in the bedroom. Jeff thought she said cluck and he's dressed up in a full chicken outfit. Again, open to it once a year. Hey, listen, cool, dude. And I think sex is one of those things that like literally, as long as it's consensual, it's long as a consensual and of age,

then anything under the sun is cool. So people like to be choked out. That's where I think, like if my partner needed violence in the bedroom in order to, sexual violence, in order to be turned on, I think that's where it would, that was really where the rubber would meet the road for me because I'm just too much of a pussy to start like, you know, beating people up and choking them.

And I just don't, I feel bad about that stuff, you know? Well, that's why you wouldn't be with the partner than that would like to do that. But there's a whole segment of people that like that kind of thing. Have you ever been with a man that wanted like rough, wanted to be roughed up, kicked in the nuts, choked? Anything like that?

That's where I draw the line. That's where I draw the line. I was with a girl once who was like, you can choke me. And I was like, I don't, that's not, it didn't last very long either. And I think it was because of that, because my immediate reaction, and maybe I should have like taken some time

and breathed through it a little bit, but my immediate reaction was like, no, fuck, no, I'm not gonna choke you. And she's like, no, I'm telling you that that's okay. And I'm like, I understand, but that's not gonna happen. I'm not gonna choke you. And she was like, well, why you're not open minded to that? And I'm like, listen, I'm really open minded

at the end of the day, but I don't need an accident to happen here at my apartment. And then I end up being the beast of fucking Howell Mill. You know what I'm saying? I mean like, the beast of Howell Mill. The beast of Howell Mill. Yeah, I think it depends. Yeah, you have a conversation about things

and see how comfortable you both are. Yeah, but I could see this being like sexual activity being a deal breaker Like I have had friends that are real prudes and I say that with the most in most the most loving and affectionate way I mean like straight-up Missionary position that's what they're into and that's what they would like their partner to be into also And I think it had a lot to do with the way that far as you know Well, I do know. You never know.

Like I actually do know. Yes, that's true. That's true. You know, sometimes people say one thing and they do the other. What about political? Well, I mean, it's like that. We were just done in Jamaica, you know, and the- Jamaica Mon.

And the hedonism places are down there. Did you guys go visit? No, we didn't. But we, the place we were staying at, there would be these ships, I guess, that would go by on their way to like this other party port type of thing we were near. And we were talking to the people and they said,

yeah, there's the naked boat. They goes, bye. Bye. Since all of those people are into it. Show me your DDKter. It's not for me on the naked boat, but hey, those people are into it. You would be on the naked boat in a hard thing.

Yeah. I don't believe you for a second. I would waive. Yes, you would waive. You'd be on that naked boat in a second. I would be on that naked boat in a second. Yeah, there's a curiosity. One time we were at the party, we were at the party in the woods. Right. A version of the party in the woods, like a smaller version

of it. And so we're all camping out. Speaking of hedonism. Hedonism has nothing on party in the woods. Hippie hedonism. Yeah, hippie hedonism. That's right. And we were all camping for a couple of nights, right? And it was a summertime, so it's getting a nice comfortable temperature outside. On this private farm up in North Georgia, miles away from the, even the closest gas station. I mean, we're just in the middle of nowhere. And this big pasture, just imagine this big pasture where all these people are kind of, you know, spread out camping.

Well, there was a couple of golf carts that were riding around and about three or two, three, four in the morning, whatever it was, everyone is twisted the fuck up. And one of the, my friends drives by with the golf cart. And he's like, Hey, man, you want to get on the bus? And I was like, the naked bus? That's what I said. And he's like, you want to do naked bus? And I was like, I want to do naked bus, but I didn't really want to do naked bus I was like kind of making a joke about it. Oh, you can't judge around that this road And then I felt the need to also and so I am not even joking It took us about 30 minutes But we had five people on that golf cart and a train of human beings behind us

Dancing with their drums and their boobs and their penises. Get on the naked bus, get on the naked bus. We were doing this for hours and I was like, wow, this is awesome. There's a lot of naked people here and I'm enjoying it actually. So I would get on the hedonism naked boat. No one's, listen, I have nothing to show, but you know, whatever.

I couldn't be the worst in the group, you know what I'm saying? It's not like it's all like super good-looking people to begin with. Oh no. Oh no. I have friends who've been to hedonism and wait, Marlon went to hedonism. Oh right.

Yeah, and he said that actually it wasn't as, you know, a lot of times like the nude beaches and stuff like that that you go to, you're like, wow, like when I go to Spain sometimes, there are all flavors, shapes, shapes and sizes of human beings that are in some state of disrobing because generally it's not as prudish in Spain as it is here, the beaches are-

Europe's that way. Europe is that way. And in some places people go fully naked and they tan, right? And it's not like, there's nothing sexual about it. They're just getting a tan all over, I guess. You know, something, something in their bum holes. And, but you know, there, I think there is like this general mystique about nude beaches that it tends to be

the people who you don't want to see naked that are most naked, you know? But Marlon went to hedonism and said, actually, you know, it was a good mix of people. It was younger, it was middle aged, it was older. He said it was kind of all over. And there was a lot of action going on all around. If I remember correctly, he almost got some.

The name of the resort. Hedonism, been around for a long time. Yeah, and I guess it's so popular that our driver was telling us they're opening up a second one down there. I was like, well, there's so much demand. There's so much demand for cock and balls that we're all down here. This episode brought to you by cock and balls.

Yeah, boy! This episode brought to you by Heedonism number four. I think they have three of them down there already or something, like Heedonism one, two, and three. Yeah, I think it is. Yeah, and I think that depending on which one you go to is like... We were not there, but we heard of it. It was around us somewhere. I say they weren't there.

I saw the pictures. Yeah, so I could see it, if you were with someone in a serious relationship and one was okay with going into hedonism and one was not going okay with going into hedonism, that I could see being a rub. Here's another one. Yeah, what's another deal breaker?

I think another deal breaker is political leanings. Oh, yeah. Especially in 2024. I believe that there was a day and a time, like not too long ago, when it was possible that a person from one side of the aisle and a person from the other side of the aisle or political leanings one way or the other

could get along and be just fine because politics wasn't something that consumed every minute of conversation. But in 2024, I actually think it is a deal breaker. Like I don't see how I could be attracted to some schools of thoughts around politics right now. You know, I would be like, I don't know how you think that. I'm not sure how you believe that.

Well, unfortunately, things have gone so extreme on both sides. Yes. But then you just automatically think that that person believes in the most extreme. That's right. So if you're the type of person who believes that blueberry flavored vape should not be sold in gas stations, I am 1,000% not marrying you. It's just a reality for me. I'm worried about the important stuff.

And the real issues. The real issues at hand. Well, you, I mean, you've got to keep your gas station stuff in check, because that's where your products are being sold. That's where I get all my new brews and my blueberry vapes. And you sell your products. Yeah, that's right. Why Brian 3000?

Why Brian 3000? Flying off the shelves because they're expired. Legally have to be taken off the shelves because of the Glory and Tory ready for your death. You'll be harder than a Christmas tree three months after Christmas. You'll be ready to set on fire. Literally. Yeah.

Why Brian 3000? Now available nowhere. I don't know how that couple, who is that Kelly in Conway and George Conway? I don't know how the two of them sleep together at night. How do you know? They're getting divorced. Oh, they are? Yeah. Oh, well, then there you go. See, I think I proved myself right. I think I'm going to be the best.

I'm going to be the best. I'm going to be the best. I'm going to be the best. I'm going to be the best. I'm going to be the best. I'm going to be the best. I'm going to be the best. I'm going to be the best.

I'm going to be the best. I'm going to be the best. I'm going to be the best. I'm going to be the best. I'm going to be the best. I'm going to be the best. I'm going to be theway. I don't know how the two of them sleep together at night. How do you- I think they're getting divorced. Oh, they are? Oh, well, then there you go. See, I think I proved myself right on this one.

There's such a high profile couple and so directly opposite in all of their political beliefs. Like she would literally say one thing and her husband be talking shit about her the next day, but they seem to work out just fine. And I guess they didn't work out just fine. But I think Kellyanne Conaway, I don't know, but I think she's like angling for another position in the Trump administration. And I imagine that that's just got to cause so much drama when you go to lay down at night. If you're like a liberal

and then your wife wants to be a part of the Trump administration, that's just no, no, no, no, no. But so that's definitely one I think could break up a marriage. What's another one that could break up a marriage? Well, I mean, if you actually got to the point of getting married, you know, hopefully people are talking about this before. Yeah, serious relationships are marriage or whatever. I mean, I guess maybe religion could be one. Oh, I think religion definitely could be one.

Although, you know, there's a lot of that where especially back in the day when a lot of immigrants were coming and things where there was a, you know, a Jewish person and a Catholic person, they got together and it worked somehow. And these people were married for years and years. And then I mean, I think there's ways that it can work.

I guess it depends on how staunch you are. We know somebody and I'll tell you all fair, but we know somebody Catholic Jewish, Catholic Jewish and it works and then how they raise their children, they're gonna give them the option to do this or to do that or whatever. I don't think that that at the end of the day, like I could see how you might be able to navigate that.

Yeah, I'm not really a religious person, so to be honest with you. And I wouldn't fault someone that I was attracted, like if it was the love of my life, I wouldn't hold, like if they were religious, I think I could be fine, just fine with that. Whatever makes you happier, better, more comfortable, more lovely, more empathetic, more loving.

I don't care, it doesn't matter to me. if that means you go to the synagogue or church or the temple or whatever it is. I don't really care. No. Yeah. This gives me an extra hour to sleep on Sundays. So that's by myself in the bed. I believe that religion is, I believe the sentiment of most religions at the end of the line is mostly the same.

Do unto others. That's mostly the same. Now, there's a lot of dogma with a lot of religions that cause a lot of drama in between, but I think the overarching theme is just be a good human. So if you take it at that- Except for the cults. The cult, listen, as we have talked about with our own TCB cult that we've been starting

with no one is, you know, listen, there's a lot of good that comes out of cults. There's a lot of good that comes out of cults. As Netflix and Lifetime movies show. Yeah. And what I mean by good is you, the leader gets a lot of money that then he can use to buy an extra ticket for his wife to get on the next flight after she miss wives.

Oh, here's one. Here's one. The need for multiple partners or wives. Right? Yeah, that's deal breaker. Okay, let's talk about it. We'll be back. or wives, right? Yeah, I thought that's deal breaker. Okay, let's talk about it, we'll be back. Well, thank the baby Jesus. Brian took a breath and now I will use this opportunity to let you know that we've got a brand new phone number.

That's right, it's 212-433-3TCB. And you can text us anytime you want. Or you can call or leave us a voicemail and we might just use your message on the show. Once Brian gets through all the messages he missed last year, of course. Anyway, you can also find and DM us on Instagram at the commercial break and on TikTok at TCB Podcast. And of course, all of our audio and video is easily found on tcbpodcast.com.

Now I'm gonna thank G one more time that we have sponsors. So thank G and here they are. Okay. Back talking about deal breakers with serious relationships, committed partnerships or marriages. And one of the things that I had thought about was the need for multiple partners. And I don't necessarily mean sexual partners. I mean just like extra partners in the relationship. I don't see this working out all that often. If television is any indication, though I do know there are people out there

who are in very successful plural marriages, plural relationships. I need to do more tongue twisters in the beginning of the show. I feel like my tongue just got super lazy on this episode. But I do know of, at least, it's like an urban myth. I've heard of this working out with people, right? I've known people who have been through it.

It ended up not working out so great for them, but I do understand that every person is a different person and their tolerance for certain stuff might be higher or lower. For me, having multiple wives is a no-no. I would not be into that, no way. And I know for my wife that is a no-no also. It's just not of any interest to me. Right. And you found a partner that you felt the same.

Correct. I have a hard enough time convincing Astrid that she should marry me. I don't want to have to go out and do it again. And I'm not looking for the... I don't see how that would benefit our relationship, me and Astrid's relationship. Astrid and I, how that would benefit our relationship in any meaningful way to have an extra partner around the house. And this new season of Seeking Sister Wives is on.

Starting... Oh, God. You already made me watch Love is Blind. Now I'm hooked on that. I made you watch Love is Blind for a reason. Sling shot me straight into the Ultimatum, which I said I was not gonna watch Night did. Is it good?

Like a mob to the flame. Do you like it? I know. I'm gonna do it. Well, it automatically starts it. Oh, you just watched all eight episodes that so far of Love is Blind in one night? Yes.

Chrissy, hold on. No, no, no, not love is blind But all the ultimatum. No, I know but yes over the weekend I watched all of the love is blind and then you went straight into the ultimatum I said it would be a good idea Don't say why but I said it would be a good idea for reasons pertaining to the content of the show I got Jeff and do it. Oh, was he watching it too? What did he think? He was like, oh, no, love is blind. But yet every time he would come into the room.

Of course. And then at the end of the night, you know, was watching, finished up watching, and I said, we don't have to watch this. We can watch something else. We'll change anything. He goes, but I'm kind of into it. Yeah, don't turn it off.

Just yeah. I kind of want to know what happens. I'm like, I know you get invested in these people. Listen, it's at the very end too. They're about to get down the aisle or not. I cannot wait. Yeah, no, none of them are going down the aisle. I guarantee that.

Maybe one of them. One of them I think is going down the aisle, but we won't do spoilers here, but I walked in the other night on Astrid. It was like, I had to get up early. I walked in on Astrid. I did. I had to get up early the other day,

doing some things. And so I said, you know what? I'm gonna get out of the studio early, I'm gonna go to bed so I get a nice long good night's sleep, which never happens, but I always feel very optimistic beforehand, then my world comes crashing in the second my mind settles, I'm like, oh my God, I'm fucked with this, I'm fucked with that,

I got kids I gotta pay for, insurance, I have life insurance, I should get that. My mind just goes in this constant circle. But anyway, I walk in and Astrid is watching The Bachelor, right? And I have watched The Bachelor with Astrid before, not very often. And when I do, I usually watch it as a joke, right?

I'm thinking of funny things that I can say on the show or I make Astrid laugh at the things that I say about the people's behavior or whatever. I'm doing running commentary like we do here on the show. Well, I walk in and it's like at home week where they take all the girls, they take the guy to the hometowns. That's right, hometowns.

And I am telling you what, there is one girl on there and she is deaf from Lyme disease or partially deaf. Are you watching the season? You know, okay. So she's partially deaf from Lyme disease or something like that. And they're at the hometown and the dad is talking to her and the mom is talking to her.

And they're such great parents, at least on camera. They're saying all the right things. Astrid's weeping. And I promised myself I wouldn't get involved. I stood at that bathroom door for like 35 minutes watching that. The shower was running too, and I'm just like. That's the thing, if you never watch it, you're good. You're good.

And you're good, and you will make fun of it all day long. As soon as you get hooked. You get emotionally hooked. It's game over. As soon as you see your stories and see the people. Yeah. It's game over. As soon as you see her as a story and see the people, yeah. It's game over. All right, so Love is Blind, that other show, The Ultimatum, is exactly what I'm talking about. These people are having trouble in their relationship.

So let's bring in even more beautiful people. Let's switch. Yeah, let's switch. Let's partners. Let's have sex with other people and see if it's working out. It's the most insane idea. It really is. It is such an American idea to do. I mean, it's just a dumb idea, but people love it.

People love the show, they really do. So I'm watching this seeking sister wife, right? And the premise is seeking a sister wife. It's a couple that is seeking additional wives. In some cases they already have additional wives, they're seeking additional, yet even more wives. There is this one, I don't know, there's three ladies that are married to one guy and he's a real smooth talker. I mean, he is just a real- Just like I, Cody. No, not Cody. That's a different one. That's

sister wives, the show. Well, what are we talking about? I'm talking about seeking sister wives. They follow multiple couples or plural marriages as they go out to seek new, yes, on dates, finding, engaging, marrying, whatever it happens to be. And now here's the thing, I've been watching this, this is like season five or six, I've been watching this since it came out. There are very rarely any couples that are on more than

two seasons. Actually, the original batch of couples, I don't think any of them are still around because here's the deal. It doesn't usually work out. I'm not saying that it never works out. I'm saying it doesn't usually work out. Maybe the cameras and the extra scrutiny and all that. I was going to say, yeah, throwing the TV cameras. Yeah, it's not real life. Right. But man, it's this, so there's a new girl, let's say that last season, they had this one smooth talking guy, he doesn't work,

because he says the women don't want him to work, they want him to stay home and sharpen up his brain. He's the brains of the house. So he does a lot of reading. That's what he's, I do a lot of reading. I wasn't made for work. The girls work and I stay home, right? They buy a house for him. He's not even married to them. They are married to each other

He that's how he wants it because he wants their connection to be strong That's how he wants it so he can leave whenever he goddamn pleases. That's what it is He has no legal repercussions for doing anything. He lives in their house eats their food. They go to work They marry each other. It's the most insane situation. But listen, I'm not in anybody's shoes, so maybe that works out perfectly for these ladies. They seem content and happy. They get a third wife last season. Now this wife is younger.

She seems like maybe she's not 100% on board, but she gets convinced to get married to them. Quote, unquote. But the marriage ceremony isn't real because he won't marry any of the ladies, they need to marry each other. So now this season, he's saying, you need a wife. These two are married to each other, now you need a wife, let's go get more.

And the girls who are originally in the relationship are all about this, they're like, yeah, we need two or three more girls in the relationship. And I'm thinking to myself, what in the good fuck, where did you fall off a tree? This guy isn't working, He's not doing anything. He's maybe having sex with you. Okay, I get that.

Maybe he brings some emotional comfort, but you're not even married to the fucking guy. There's no security whatsoever. It's like you guys are buying him houses and cars and paying his everything. And all you're doing is to encouraging him to go get more, pussay! Like it's just insane!

It's insane to me. I don't know how this guy keeps up. I'd really like to know. I'd really like... Well, you need to watch the show. You fuck around and find out. Fuck around and find out. Well, I do watch the show, but they don't show me the sex part. That's what I want to know. How does this guy get from one place to the other? How often do you masturbate? They have a room, a specific room for the sex. That's way too complicated for me, and that's definitely a deal breaker.

But it's something that they like. Yeah, well listen. That's to them. I guess. I'd love to just, for me, I look at this and I know that there's everybody to their own and I really at the end of the day I don't care what anybody does with their personal life but I just like to pull these women aside and like to say, are you being held captive? Like, is anybody being kidnapped here?

Because this seems a little odd that you just agree to everything this guy says. That's a cult. That's what that is. It's not sister wives. It's a fucking cult. And they're all like, you know, praying to the God of this guy's dick.

It's gotta be tough for the kids too. How do you explain all of that to the kids, other kids? They only have one kid. They're home schooled, but they're home schooled. Oh, they're definitely home schooled. That's home schooling. That's a breathing ground for home schoolers.

I think that's how all these homeschool, you know, all these homeschool online courses and stuff. That's how they make their money. They make it off the people who have more than one wife. I'm sure of it. Just kidding. Lots of people are homeschooled. Works out just fine.

Just ask any child who is homeschooled. And I had one more. What was the one more deal breaker that I had that I can't think of now? Oh yeah, married to a podcaster or in a serious relationship with a podcaster. Listen, let me tell you right now, someone who is obsessed with their works, a workaholic.

If you yourself are not a version of a workaholic and you're married to a workaholic, I can see where that may cause some friction. I don't think it's the world's biggest deal breaker. I think that if you already know that about that person. Or the one person's a workaholic and the other person watches Love is Blind. That's what's happening in my house right now.

You work. You work. What are you talking about? I think Jeff's just working so he could stay out of the Love is Blind territory. You know what I'm saying? I don't think Jeff really has work. I think he's doing it so he doesn't have to watch

Brian's Bad TV show advice. He really has work. But you know what I'm saying? I don't think Jeff really has work. I think he's doing it so he doesn't have to watch Brian's bad TV show. He really has work, but you know what? I keep myself busy with the love is blind. Yeah. And you listen for my work, for your own work. And you come over here and you record to no one. And that's good too. That's good for you.

Right. Everything's working swimmingly. How's Jeff feeling about it? He's on board. I think we need an update from Jim. He's not going to leave me at the airport. No, he's not going to leave you at the airport. I feel like I need to pull Jeff aside and ask him. Are you being kidnapped? How are you feeling about everything?

Blink once. Blink once if you're in a two-two with a chicken outfit. If Chrissy's chasing you around with a dildo. Going into our annual pegging day. It's annual pegging day. You write that on the calendar? Do you guys have a calendar over there? Like a shared calendar?

We do have a shared calendar. Yeah? Do you guys like, tonight's the night? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha give it to him. Thank me! Hey, don't knock it till you've tried it. That's right. I know a lot of guys who love prostate massages. And I've seen one. So if you want to know how that goes. I've seen it happen live. Imagine being at a

prostate massage tutorial class. And then I think you could probably fill your head with imagery just from what I just said. Yeah. But if you'd like to learn more, feel free. Was that at a homeschool? No, it was at a hippie hedonism. Yes, it was homeschool.

All right, listen, we'd love you to be on the commercial break asking directly, Chrissy and I, the questions you'd like to ask. So if you're interested in coming on air and asking the questions or need some life advice or you want to tell us your story because you think it's interesting enough do us a favor text us at 1212-433-3TCB. That's 1212-433-3TCB. Again if you need life advice you have a question you want to ask something interesting about yourself that you'd like to share with Chrissy and I. Of course it could be done anonymously but we'd love to have you on air to do that. So two one two four three three three TCB. You can also

leave questions, comments, concerns, content ideas as a text message or a voicemail. We'll take both of them, ask Brian's mom, ask for, ask for TCB. If you'd like to not be on the air and ask for our advice, feel free to do that also. We understand, we get it. We don't want you to lose your job. TCBpodcast.com, that's where you go. You get your free piggy front and sticker by hitting the contact us button, hit the dropdown menu, give us your address, we'll send you a sticker. Add the commercial break on Instagram

if it's back up and running. TCB podcast on TikTok and YouTube.com slash the commercial break. All right, Chrissy, I guess that's all I can do for today. I think so. But I'll tell you that I love you. I love you. I'll say best to you. Best to you.

And best to you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I always say, we do say and we must say, goodbye! 🎵 I get ass!