The Commercial Break - Sleeping Topless Ruins Friendships!

Episode Date: October 21, 2022

Long time listener Callie writes in to discuss her friendship with Danny. Danny and her just can't quit each other...but they are JUST friends. She asks the age old question: Can a man and a woman (or man/man or woman/woman....etc) just be friends?Who better to answer the question than decades long friends Bryan and Krissy! TCB buddies up to Charlamange The God on Google! Colon Blow...it's coming to Bryan's house Callie writes in to ask about her friend zone with Danny Krissy and Bryan recall how they remained friends all these years Does sleeping naked...ruins friendships? What will Callie do?! Who knows... Bryan and Krissy dish out some final (and useless) advice LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us or leaving a voicemail at 1-661-Best-2-Yo (1.661.237.8296) Watch Us on YouTube American Musical Supply is offering $20 off any purchase over $100 Take a Listen to The Jordan Harbinger show! Dumb People Town Is a Very Funny Podcast From Starburns Audio Use This Link For Unlimited Talk & Tex on MINT MOBILE! 1-(661)-BEST-2-YO  | (1-661-237-8296) This episode is sponsored by American Musical Supply. Go Here and use promo code TCB to receive $20 off a purchase over $100. Special Thanks To Our Associate Content Producers: Tina Rose Big Will The Champ Marianne Duke Luke Gustavo Special Thanks To Our Commercial Breakers Roxanne Dave Sydney Ronald M Stu Carly Mia Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Okay, well I witness here what I see was a horrible tragic situation. The guy was coming down and I guess the police was trying to do a stop point, the man said no, not today and they began to race behind each other like Casino. The police also got behind the man and started going so fast his car spits out of control. Girl, he hit the pole, his head with the one side and his body went to the other side and this is the result. Lord be with this young man, he need a blessing. So where were you when this happened?

Well, ma'am, I was actually going to be a piece of burger from Burger King. On this episode of the commercial break. Like night, night time or are they putting me out like we're going to put a breeding apparatus on. I like it're gonna put a reading apparatus Twilight stuff. It's like a Michael Jackson sleep sleep time. Yeah, exactly. Okay, so the Milky light. Can I or can I not take some gummy bears before? So like let's fast forward to a week later whatever it was. Chrissy and I are sitting in her apartment and doing our normal,

let's drink 12 Bud lights in an hour and order a pizza, and then we'll just walk outside and see what kind of trouble we can get into. Usually we're led to a bar, so I'm kind of missed you. She was a year older than I was. She was absolutely, in my opinion, stunningly beautiful. And she would give me the time of day like like you would pet a puppy dog right like oh Brian that's really right I'd be

like Miles Davis is great if you ever heard of Dave Matthews Bay the next episode of the commercial break starts now Break starts now. Oh yeah, Kassiegans, welcome back to the commercial break. I am Brian Green, this is my dear friend, Kristen Joy only. Best of you, Chris H. And that's the Brian. And best of you out there in the podcast universe. How they all are, thanks for joining us on yet another episode of this.

The commercial break. Hey, it's not for everyone, but Fag news or fiction is guaranteed in 30 seconds or less. Go to the very old tcbpodcast.com to collect your earning. Very old. Well we had to do the old switcheroo on the website while we're getting a new website from our new website that was replacing the old website. The OG website. The OG website.

We went back to the original version. Yeah. I have very important podcasting news for you, breaking podcast news. Ding, ding, ding, ding. So you know, I have a day job because God knows this podcast. I'm in the little, I have a day job. And somebody in the company,

a podcast industry executive texted me this morning and he said, holy shit, look at this. And he said to me, a screen shot and he's googling comedy podcasts, right? That's what he's googling. And up in Google comes up the pictures of our podcast covers, right? Like a list of podcast covers. Right.

So there's like one and two, which I think one is Conan O'Brien and two is smartness. Number three is the commercial break and then Charlene the God is behind it. So this guy was like, look at you, dude. Wow. The commercial break the God. And I was like, look at you, dude. Wow. The commercial break the God. And I was like, wow. Google clearly a mistake. Yeah, exactly.

And what's Google doing? Well, we know from our Google days that actually, Google, Google sometimes tailors the results based on your own browsing history. That's true. Yeah, so this guy's probably stalking us. He wants to look at for a way to fire me. And I'm giving him 10 different reasons every single episode. So there you go

I'm officially old and I'll tell you what get to besides my increasing belly my shrinking my shrinking penis and my in-learn gated balls and the hairline going do you know what I had to do today that really is like to me is one of those things that indicates that I'm a really fucking old man What is that? I had to schedule a Roto Reuter. A Roto Reuter. Like my own, like my own, colonoscopy. Yes.

In and out. You gotta do it. Good flushing. You gotta do it. I gotta do it. Well, you will do the cleaning with all the stuff they make you take. So tell me what's this all about because I know Jeff's been through a few days. Yeah, yeah. And it's very important.

Very important. I agree with you. Listen, I'm all about checking my asshole. I check my asshole frequently. I'm checking. I ask Astrid to do it, but there's only so far that a marriage will go. You know, there's only so much a marriage will take.

We check each other for skin tags and mulls and stuff like that. It's very important, right? It is very important. And everyone's in a while, I'm gonna get into all the details, but I'll say, hey, honey, it's time for a cancer check. Yeah. Yeah. Chuck goes once a year for one to the dermatologist.

No, I mean, I check her. To the whole body. Okay, there we go. Oh, sorry. Oh, yeah, I just went to the dermatologist, and he looked me over. And he's like, you're one ugly son of a bitch, but I don't think you're dying.

He said, stop going to the, he says, if him and Astrid got together beforehand, it's handing. He said stop going to the he says if him and Astrid got together beforehand. Yeah to talk to me about the tanning because he just gave me he basically said the exact same thing my wife says every single time that I go to the tanning bed and so I'm sure I know it because she went a week before I know they're incahuts of course they fucking are I don't like that but I can appreciate the where they're coming from. At least Astrid cares about my health and well-being.

And the guy's only gonna make the most amount of money if I stick with him for a long time. So I'm gonna die of skin cancer next week. You know, he's not gonna get the extra, whatever it is, $30 my insurance pays for that. But I had to schedule the colonoscopy and now, so what happens? What am I in for?

What am I looking at? Cause I really don't know. Yeah, you said they'll give you a list of stuff that you'll take the day before. You can't eat after a certain period, the day before, too, and you can only do like clear liquid. Can I do water?

Yeah, you can do water. You can do water. That's my normal thing. But yeah. Water until cereal and milk. Exactly. It's like water, cereal and cream. And cream, that's right.

So they give you these liquids that flush you out? Well, I mean, yeah, it's like Blacksitive stuff. It's like 12xlacks and take this Gatorade. Oh my god, really? So really it's kind of the day before the stores bar. You just sit in the bathroom? Yeah, they be near the bathroom that evening.

When they are they putting me out for like night, night time or are they putting me out like we're gonna put a reading apparatus on. Twilight, kind of stuff. It's like a Michael Jackson sleep sleep time. Yeah, exactly. So the milky light white liquid. But then you don't feel it, you don't.

Can I or can I not take some gummy bears before I go? I don't know. Maybe. Because I'm feeling like that they give me a lot more fun. Maybe well they have like liquid THC now. Yeah, so maybe I just drink that before I go. Yeah, I drink liquid. It's like seven spoonfuls of clear THC.

Sure. The sticky yikki, man. I'm gonna do some dabs before I go. Yeah, because smoke is not considered, like it's not going into my galley. So I just dab it up before I go. Dab it up. Dab it up. Dab it up. A couple finger dips.

A couple finger dips in the double dab. And I'll be dreaming of, you know. All kinds of things. Asex all the whole time. One of the six. So then you wake up. It's fine. You know, your groggy, ashtrayed will be the one to take you home.

You have to have somebody there. Yeah. And yeah. And you know, you're fine when you wake up and you say a couple crazy things when you first wake up. And then you're done and you're hungry. You want to eat after that. Oh, really? I just want to, like, I'm in a munch, munch, munch. Yeah, I don't know if I want Astrid picking me up after that.

Because you never know it's going to come out of your mouth when you're in one of those situations. It's not that bad. I don't know. I'm just, I'm going to take a new bird. Well, no, you can't.'s gonna come out of your mouth when you're in one of those situations. It's not that bad. I don't know. I'm gonna just, I'm gonna take a new bird. Well, no, you can't. They won't let you do it. They won't let you take a new bird.

Now you have to have someone there. They have it someone in the building. I'll pay the uber guy a couple extra bucks. I show up. Okay. I'll tell Carl to come pick me up. Yeah. They're gonna have to stay there in the waiting room.

Hey. Hmm. Hey girl, I'm here to pick up Brian. Wow, you look, you have ever talked to the Lord? Have you ever heard about Jesus Christ or Savior? Here, let me , let me, let me give you a phone number, let me send you a few pictures. Look at that. That's a victory. You call that a victory V. Oh, the victory V. Oh, the victory V girl. I know you got a victory V. Oh, it's Brian's awake awake. Okay, tell me hang on a few minutes. I got some pressing business up here at the front at the nurse's station.

The nurse's station. You know, nurse's stations are just like stepping stones to heaven if you know that. Chris is nurses are one with the Lord and I do some personal preaching at my house if you know what I mean girl. Oh yeah. So if you give me your Skype then and we like and we like to do it in the new because you know that's how we were balled. Yeah. From ashes to ashes, dust to dust. Look on my balls, you must, you must, you know what I'm saying. You know what I'm saying. Yeah, it makes perfect sense. Hey, listen, what are you doing later, girl? Girl? You, Chrissy. Oh, me. That's the whole time I've been talking to everybody else. You're right across the table. You'm talking. You're here every Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday. That's right.

I'm free. I'm free, Carl. I'm thinking we go through the Bible together. Yeah. I'm saying, I need to make some special passages. The Viticus, PornHub, dash. PornHub-slovenc.com.

Okay, Carl, I gotta go. Mm. Well, I'm old, so I guess that's the way it is, and now I gotta go get one of those calling up. But my grandfather did have colon cancer multiple times. Oh, multiple times. So you definitely need to be getting checked. Yeah, that's kind of, but he was so old

that after a while they were just like, I whatever. I mean, that's what happens. You know, after you get so old, they're like, you know, what are we gonna do? We're gonna put you down, we're gonna cut out half your colon, and then you're not gonna survive the surgery. So, something's gonna get you.

Let's just leave you alone. Why bother you with all that crap? I just don't like the thought of a whole day not eating and shitting all day, but I do know that it's important, so I will go get it done sometime in the next five years. Okay, sounds good. This question I knew was gonna come up. I knew it was gonna come up. I knew we were gonna get this question at some point.

We got an Ask TCB. Somebody's asking us for our advice. But I think this question is really directed at you and I. Okay. So I'm just gonna say right now, if you have small children in the car, you should turn this off. If your name is Astrid or Jeff,

you should probably turn this off. Off for it. Okay, you ready? Here this off. Off for it. Okay, you ready? Here it comes. I'm just gonna get into it and we can go from there. Okay. Okay, TCB, here's my question, need your advice. Okay.

Can a man and a woman just be friends? My name is Callie and I live in Callie for almost 12 years I've been friends with Danny. Danny and I met when he was dating my friend. It didn't last long, maybe a month, but we went, but we all went out a few times and we became Facebook friends. After they stopped dating, Danny and I would frequent the same bars and clubs. So we became running into each other. Yeah. So it made sense that we became friendly.

It's like we were an old married couple from day one. We love the same foods, but argue over where to go to eat. We know each other's coffee orders. We fart in front of each other. We go shopping for clothes together. We fuss at each other over stupid shit, but we always laugh together and we always do things together. We almost never fight for real.

Everyone thinks of us as a team. All of our friends, our family members know that if one is coming, it's likely the other one is coming also. We have both had boyfriends and girlfriends over these years. So I liked, some I hated, but we always ended up being single and now we just laugh at the situation. Never ever have we made out. Not once.

We sleep over at each other's homes and we sleep in the same bed. Sometimes I even sleep topless, but nothing. Not even a game of tag and tickle is Brian would say. We have this invisible line between us. I used to build pillow walls with some people. We have this invisible line between us that we don't cross physically, but we are definitely married otherwise. We've never spoken about getting together more than friends until recently. Listen, I love Danny, I have since the beginning, but I cannot see us being together together. I thought he felt the same, but the other day he brought it up, he asked if we should give it a try. He said that after all of these years, if we can stand each other this long, we could be good together.

While I initially thought, hell the fuck no, I do not want to ruin this amazing friendship. I have to admit, I think sometimes, I don't give myself to other relationships because of Danny. Oh. I don't want to lose him, so I don't give the attention I should give to the boyfriend at the time.

I know this is a problem because boyfriends have told me so. Actually, all of them have told me so. Ha it's got me asking, can we just be friends? I figure you two might know the best. Have you ever, have you two ever dated? Best to you, love you much, Cali. Best to you, Cali. Best to you, Cali.

This is a loaded question, I think. But the answer to, not the load, not about Chrissy and I, but I think just in general, the question is loaded. Yeah. But Chrissy and I have never dated. Yes, now. Never now once. But we have a very similar friendship

when we were not married to other people. Yeah, when we were both same goal, we would sleep in the same bed. Sure. You would come to family functions. You came out and stayed at my grandfather's house that night. Yep.

And yeah, I mean, we were together, we were the Bobsy twins. We were the Bobsy twins, and that led to a lot of speculation about whether or not we were together. Because we also worked together. We worked together. The truth was the truth,

which was nothing was going on, but everybody thought so. So after a while, you just stop answering the question because it doesn't fucking matter what you say. People are gonna think you're together. So whatever doesn't matter. But I do think this is a loaded question as far as relationships are concerned.

Yeah, well I was gonna say the fact that they're, they've dated other people and then now they're back both single again and they're maybe tossing around that idea. Let me just say this, you know, what if the sex isn't good? What if they hook up a sex is not good? Then things are weird. I can think of a friendship. And it's, didn't you, you know, the friendship, yeah. I can think of a friendship that we had where, and I mean, we like, she was in our friend group. And we ended up becoming buddy, buddy, after we first met and that friendship was

kind of fast and hard We're like, okay, cool. We like hanging out with each other. Let's go do this. Let's go do that And we would go to events together nothing like Chrissy and I's friendship But to some degree a little bit like Chrissy and I's friendship Yeah, and we liked to laugh together and we had a lot of fun and she was a great friend to me And I think for a period of time I was a good friend of her and then one night She started like sex messaging me, and I think it just got a little saucy a little quick.

Like, we also had a lot of drinking going on at that time. I had a lot of drinking going on at that time. And so the word ample opportunity to what your whistle so to speak. Like, you know, I had sex with more of our friends than I care to admit. And almost every time it didn't work out. No, it's the reason why it just changes things. It does.

You cannot look at a person the same way after you have sex with them. It's so true. And then jealousy creeps in. Maybe one person doesn't want to be them together anymore. Yeah. The other person does, and now you've had sex. And it's, yeah, it's tricky.

I feel like you should be with your best friend, but I don't, and what I mean by that is, I think you should be together with your best friend. Like you two should think of each other as best friends, but I think if you start off as friends and you let that run too long, like if you let that run more than a year, and then you try and hook up in my experience, and I know there's plenty of people out there

who are gonna tell me differently, but in my experience, it has almost never worked out. Yeah, well you're married to Astrid, so I didn't work out. I'm still trying to have sex with all her friends, but hey listen, that's just my own personal picadillo's here. We're in an open relationship, and by open I mean she's gonna divorce me

if I do anything with any of her friends. The door will be open, I will be able to walk out of it. She will close it behind me and then take the house. The truth is though you say something that has I think a little twist of honesty, a little like a little it hits me in the tickle pickle. The when you say that you are giving more of yourself to the friendship than you are to the relationship. That means two things. Number one, you should really be careful about when you say that you are giving more of yourself to the friendship than you are to the relationship, that means two things. Number one, you should really be careful about your friendship with Danny moving forward

when you get into a relationship with someone you actually give a shit about. That's right. But you're also dating the wrong people because when the time comes and the right person shows up, Danny will take a back seat. That's just going to happen. Yeah, you're gonna find yourself in a situation

where you're not going to Danny is just going to have to naturally kind of fade into the background for a hot minute. Yeah. I have a friend who like who checked out all together and like I never heard from her again. I think I don't know. I'm not going to say her name out loud, but you know who I'm talking about. She was like like when Astrid and I every time that I got a girlfriend, all of the sudden she like, checked out into the bathroom. Oh, yeah. Right? And one day she said,

I think I like you more than you like me. Yeah. I think that I think that I feel- She wanted more. She did. She's like, I'm hanging on for that happy ending, but I'm not sure it's ever gonna come because I don't think you feel that way.

Right? And I told her, I don't think I do either. Right. And then we were friends for many more years. And then when Astrid showed up, she was like, she's out of there. That last text message was almost cryptic. It was like, I really wish you and Astrid the best. This was like months before our wedding.

She was like, I really wish you and Astrid the best. I'll always love you. And then I never heard from her again. Never heard from her again. That's crazy. That's wild. Because I know, I mean, just thinking back on our friendship when you met Astrid and I met Jeff.

Yeah. You mean, Jeff, you, you know, we, I kicked you out the night. This Jeff and I met. Chrissy Holdy is living in an apartment building and there, there are two doors right next to it. Like, it's this big huge apartment complex. And there's like, on one side of the hallway, there's a door and on the other side of the hallway, there's a door. She meets Jeff while he's getting, she's helping him with his groceries in the

house isn't that true? Yes it is. I'd been out having some margaritas with my roommate, my girlfriend and so we saw him and you know I'm, I get quite friendly when I'm all of little tipsy. I talked to everybody. So I saw him. He had a huge trunk full of groceries and I said, Hey, hey, hey, hey, I got some sticky, sticky oven of apartment. I love you. And he said, okay, that'd be great. Thank you so much and invited me in for a glass of wine. He invited her in for a glass of wine. And then, so like, let's fast forward to a week later, whatever it was. Chrissy and I are sitting in her apartment and doing our normal, let's drink 12 Bud lights in an hour and order a pizza. And then we'll just walk outside

and see what kind of trouble we can get into. Usually led to a bar. So I'm kind of mischievous. So we're in the middle of those 12 Bud lights and Chrissy says, oh, my neighbor just texted me. You want to go over there. And I'm like, sure. And she's like, I kind of think he's like cute.

I met him the other day and I was like, oh, whatever. She's gonna love me, likes me, who's taking all this other stuff. So we go over there. And I'm like, sure. And she's like, I kinda think he's like, cute, you know, I met him the other day. And I was like, oh, whatever. She gonna love me, likes music and all this other stuff. So we go over there. I love Jeff. Jeff's great. We talk about music for like two hours. And then I think I'm just kinda stepping on Chrissy's dick a little bit.

So Chrissy is like, it's like two hours. You gonna go. Yeah, Chrissy is like, don't you have somewhere to be? I had really kinda planned to spend the night at Chrissy's house, but I was like, ah, yeah, I guess I should be going now. And Chrissy's like, like, you can go into my apartment if you want to. You're going out there. Wait, you mean we were hanging out. Now you bring me over to some, some gut at that time, some douches out. And then you want me to go and spend the night in your house by myself.

Yeah, that's what I was saying. But a good winged man always knows when it's time to exit. That's true. I think this is one of the few times when I may not have taken the first cue. I had to wait till the fifth, but at that point, we're fucking hammered. So I was like, whatever.

But I laughed like a good boy I laughed. I think I took an Uber home, but that was it. And the rest of the history, but we continued to still be extremely close and we have continued that throughout even your move to Ross. And that's why it's so sad that this is Chrissy Holtley's last episode of the commercial. Just gonna tell her no more. He's gonna say. Everyone Brian took Brian a couple of

extra minutes to find those cues. It's still still taking him a couple extra minutes to find those cues. We ended taking them a couple of extra minutes to find those cues. We ended up being friends through this entire thing. And the friend, Ebs and Flet, friendship, and the Flet. And all your girlfriends too, you know, the love of you. You hated some of my girlfriends.

Yeah, but I hated some of my girlfriends to be fair. You were dating the wrong girls. And when you met Astrid, I loved her and have continued to love her. That's true. You chose wisely, my friend. That's true. You did love Astrid from the love her. That's true. You chose wisely, my friend. That's true. You did love Astrid from the beginning.

Yes. I do have to say that. And so, Callie, I don't know what to do in this particular situation. You got to make that call for yourself. And I know that's not the advice you're looking for. Chrissy and I never cross that line. It's one of the few friendships where that never happened. In this particular friend group where that never happened.

And Rachel too, where that never happened, and it worked to our advantage, I think, because I think it had we slept together, had we dated, we may not be as good a friend as now, and we probably certainly wouldn't be doing the commercial break together. Right. But if you feel strongly that that friendship is something you don't wanna lose,

then tell him he needs to go find his hoo-ha, somewhere else, that pudend is off limits, you're not gonna to do it. And watch it when you guys are drinking, because that's when things get slippery. That is. All of a sudden, you can just get yourself into a pickle, literally, into a pickle.

Yeah, you're sleeping in the bed together, and all of a sudden hands, hands, hands, start creaky calling hands. I can't believe you sleep topless. I'd like to see a picture of Callie. You know what I'm saying? She sleeps topless. She said she sleeps topless in the bed. Oh wow. And still nothing's happened. Okay, with Annie. I mean whatever. Okay. Yeah. Oh

I don't know if I can be as strong as Danny. I just don't know. I mean, yeah, Callie send it a picture. I want to see what's going on. What's doing over there? Send it a picture of you and Annie. I want to see what's doing. That's what doing over there. Send in a picture of you and, I want to see what's doing. That's the key, I'll see you two together. I know you got to pick some friend picture of the two of you together.

Send that in because I want to see. Hey cats and kittens, welcome to the commercial break. Inside the commercial break. Hit us up with your comments, questions, concerns, or content ideas at one of two places, either 661-237-8296. You can text us or leave us a voicemail there. Or you can send us an email through the website, just go to tcbpodcast.com and hit the contact

us button. While you're there, you can listen to all the audio or watch all the video right from one location, tcbpodcast.com. Do us a favor. Take a listen to our sponsors, and if you're ever in the market for their products or services, you could use the URLs or the specialized codes we drop inside of those ads. But you don't have to spend money to love on us, you can always leave us a review, a rating, or a comment on your favorite podcast player.

Take two minutes. If you send us a screenshot, I'll send you some shwag at the commercial break on Instagram or TikTok and YouTube.com slash the commercial break. So after you listen to it here, go watch it on YouTube and get an extra laugh. You can put me your stash. We're going to hear about those sponsors now and then we'll be back to this episode of the commercial break. I think that's where all the trouble fucking starts with all the friends is when someone

gets naked and you're drunk, right? That's like, what are you going to do when you're 12, but like me, when I'm, I get to give another friend where I just had one incredibly wild night with this person, like wild night, like she was like throwing me over the kitchen counter and breaking glasses over my head and shit. It was like a intense, it's really intense. It was insane. The apartment looked like a bomb hit it when we woke up the next morning. I was like, what did we do? What is that? I didn't know I had candles. And it all happened,

not particularly because I think we liked each other. No, we didn't like each other in that way, or maybe I didn't like her in that way at least. But it all happened because we went to a bar with another girl that I had just met that I thought I would, like, a girl that I liked. But then that girl left at the end of the night and then me and our friends stayed around and we just drank our self-silly.

And when we got home, all it took, all it took was this girl unbuttoning her blouse a couple extra buttons, a nipple slip slip a nipple slip and it was like it was like a firecracker going off it was like ah it's we just went to town and that's what happens it is that is what happens but I think you've got a good episode brought to you by Budweiser by King of years and nipple pasties nipple pasties but I think Callie's got a good thing episode brought to you by Budweiser, King of ears. And Nipple Faces. Nipple Faces.

But I think Callie's got a good thing going with Danny. Yeah. I don't think you should go there. Hey, girl, it's me, Danny. I figure we've been friends for so long. We could just try the reverse cowboy. Cowgirl a couple times. See how it works out.

Listen if it's good fit, it's a good fit if it's not. So I got to list the positions that friends get into. Cowgirl, front behind, up on the shower. I grab you and carry you across the room on the cock. On the walker. On the walker. The walker, cocker. I call that the walker, cocker., I don't want to ruin our friendship,

but I figure if we could just sleep together a couple of times, we'll figure it out. Yeah, we'll figure it out. Try it out. Why not? What's the harm? What could go wrong, girl? Call it back, let me know. All right, I'll see you at 7 for dinner with your parents.

Bye. I didn't know what your parents did. I'm sorry. Yeah, you got a good thing going here girl. Yeah. And I just be careful, man be careful. Don't get into a frilly positions and watch your back. That's all I gotta say.

And I'm gonna say watch your back like what Danny's gonna hurt you. He's not, he's your friend. He's not gonna hurt you. He's not gonna do anything like that. I'm saying watch your back like what? You watch your own back. Cause what happens is you start thinking about it and then it's a slippery gonna do anything like that. I'm saying watch your back like, what you watch your own back, because what happens is you start thinking about it and then it's a slippery fucking slip.

You know what I'm saying? Maybe they should help each other, you know, set up like dating profiles or something and maybe help each other. Or do mutual masturbation. Nick, mutual masturbation. Like in the same room but not touching each other. Yeah.

And then you'll really see what's doing. Yes. And then, you know, he's already seeing you topless. So that's what that's the fucking problem, Cali. Is it your sleep in topless? And so he's taking that as a sign that maybe something work can happen, but I think he's a little gun shy to actually get it going

because he's like, oh, we're friends and you know, she's just probably comfortable sleeping like that, but the truth is, probably Danny's up half in the night, like looking at you. Yes. Yeah. Dang it.

He's probably got his mouth like half an inch from your boob while you're sleeping. He's like, should I? Should I? What does she mean? Of course, make it all consensual, Danny. I don't want to, that's I'm not implying you do anything wrong. But I can understand where Danny might be getting mixed

signals here. And that's why he might be going in. He, or maybe Danny has loved you like this from the beginning. And he has just never had the balls to say it out loud. And he's really unsure about whether or not you feel the same way because you don't generally feel the same way. So you're probably not giving off those signals. But then everyone's in a while your tits pop out and this out of the covers at night.

And he's like, holy shit, I love this girl. I really want to be with her. And that's why he's like. It's a tortured love. Yeah, it's a tortured love. And let me tell you when it never works out. Let me tell you the other reason why it never works out. Is when one person likes the other person more

than the other person likes the other person? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I heard this one wise. So this couple they've been married for like 78 years or something and they were each turning 100 and the question was how in the world do you survive a marriage 78 years when most people don't even make it for right? When everybody's getting a divorce and the I think it was the lady of the of the couple

said and this is so brilliant. She said we never fell out of love with each other at the same time and that was the key right. She's like sometimes one of us would drift a little bit from the relationships and the said we never fell out of love with each other at the same time. And that was the key, right? She's like, sometimes one of us would drift a little bit from the relationships and the other one would hang tight. I can see how that works. The hang tight, right? They would be like, I'm in this.

Like, we're here together and so you go off and, not like sleeper, though, people, you go sort it out and I'll be right here. And then it's my turn to fuck you, right? It's sick. But when you start a relationship with things so uneven. Right, out of balance. Oh yeah, no, it's really hard to come to the back.

If you had like unrequited love, have you ever had enough? I have had friends that have had it for me. Okay. Yeah, and I could tell and it makes things awkward. Oh yeah, it's just horribly awkward. Yeah. But you've never had an unrequited love? No.

No? Hmm. I'm trying to think about you. Maybe even once. Maybe when I was young. I had this, there was this girl when I was a teenager and I just thought she was the coolest fucking girl that had ever lived.

And she listened to Miles Davis at like age 15. That is cool. She was a year older than I was. She was absolutely in my, stunningly beautiful. And she would give me the time of day, like you would pet a puppy dog, right? Like, oh, Brian, that's really. Yeah, oh, Brian, I'm so sweet.

Miles Davis is great. Have you ever heard of Dave Matthews, babe? They have a saxophone too. And she'd be like, oh, Brian, that's really sweet. And I was like, oh, she don't like me. It's a nah, usually on the act. And I remember for a one month, I was hard, hard, hard hard, for this girl, and just, it just never happened.

And then eventually she kind of fell out of the circle of friends altogether, and she paid me no mention whatsoever no time whatsoever right Yeah, these things are Facebook recently and I think where things worked out for the best Well, there's nothing wrong with living in a trailer. I want to be clear about that I'm not like a classist or anything But it just looks like the girl who listened to Miles Davis, whose parents smoked weed and let her get into the staff, the coolest girl you would ever know. Smooth and cool, right?

Coolest girl you would ever know is living the most uncool life I've ever seen in my time. Well, I'll pass forward 30 years. I guess it's 2022 now. She's got like 13 kids too. Wow, 13 kids, huh? I would have taken you for one of those that never had one kid because the wheels too fucked up as it is anyway man.

Do you fuck damn dude. So I think that's unrequited love. I know I had and then I know I had one on a teacher one time too. Right. But it wasn't gonna happen. A crush. Yeah, I need to get to that.

After 12 years though, I think Danny might be more than a crush. Oh yeah. He might be more than crushin'. He's balls deep in love. He's balls deep in love and he's just hangin' on it. It's like a movie. Do you think that a man and a woman,

or a man and a man, or a woman and a woman, or an it and an it and a they and a they or whatever? Mm-hmm. Do you think that they, if you are attracted to that particular sex, right? Do you think that they, if you are attracted to that particular sex, right? Do you think you can just be friends without ever having any feelings for that person? Wait, I'm confused on what you're saying. Okay, so you and I are friends.

Yeah. Right? I'm asking the question of us. I'm just asking the question of you, right? Do you think that if you have, so you're attracted to men? Yeah. Do you think that if you have, so you're attracted to men, if you have a boy that's a friend, a man that's a friend, for a long period of time, do you think you can go that entirety and just be friends, you never have any feelings for them?

Because a lot of people say no. A lot of people will say, at some point, you're gonna catch feelings. At some point that's gonna happen. I feel like those feelings stuff that will happen. I feel like you just know early on. I think so too. I have plenty of friends that are female

that I never caught feelings for in the least. In the least. I never once, they could have slept on those next to me the whole time. I probably would have had sex with them, but I still wouldn't have had feelings for them. Yeah, I feel like the feelings part comes on pretty early.

Yeah, that's true. You know? You get that smell and that hunky, I feel like the feelings part comes on pretty early. Yeah, that's true. You know? You get that smell and that, that funky funky. That, that fair man. I had a friend who's a guy and, I have a friend who is a man and likes women and is into women,

is attracted to women. And he adamantly believes that you cannot be friends with a woman. You cannot just be friends with a woman. He's like, it doesn't work like that. You can't. If you be friends with a woman. You cannot just be friends with a woman. He's like, it doesn't work like that. You can't. If you're friends with that woman long enough and you're attracted to the woman, it doesn't matter what she looks like, it doesn't matter what she says, it doesn't matter how she

carries herself or what situation you guys get yourself into. You're going to catch feelings eventually for them. And I'm like, I just have to thoroughly disagree with you. I just have to thoroughly disagree with you. Yeah, I agree. I agree. I agree too. And I mean, we're an example of that. That's true. So, you know.

That's true. Well, it's true that these were really not friends off air. We actually just like each other quite a bit. But we're contractually obligated to be here, because we both had to sign for the roadcaster alone. Yeah. That we still are never paying off. We're never going to pay off.

And now, see, I think the kids, like the kids today, I think having like an extra layer of complexity about all of this. And I say kids, I say just anybody who's single right now because it's so transactional, dating is so transaction. Yeah, very much so. So it's hard to kind of get out there and have enough runway to sus out what feelings

really are or what they're not. Let me give you an example. And you, when you and I were single, you'd go out with somebody once or twice or three times before you would know. You would know. And you would usually meet them in a friend group. So you would already have a handkering that the two of you liked each other. Exactly.

It wasn't as spontaneous and transactional as it is now. Well, and online, I mean, so digital. Yeah, like you, I mean, I say things in, you know, on a text, maybe I wouldn't, that's the internet trolls, people say stuff. Yeah. That they would never say it to somebody's face. Catfishing and all this other things.

And it's hard to also gauge somebody's, you know, facial expressions and, you know, hand gestures and things like that. All those little things. Yeah, the flirting that goes on. The flirt. The flirt's fun. If I had one advice to anybody, the kids are having less sex. They're not interacting as much on this level.

And I understand it's because I don't think we're bill like that. Really, and our brains are trying to adjust to all of this. And these, the younger folks, the people in their 20s and early 30s They're having a hard time navigating this sort of research says they're having a hard time navigating this I'm sure some better than others Because that's like when I all almost every person that I ever dated I met at a party I met at a bar and met through a friend. They were a friend of a friend Exactly something or other and we had ample time to kind of walk into it I met at a party. I met at a bar. I met through a friend. Exactly. They were a friend of a friend. Exactly.

Something or other. And we had ample time to kind of walk into it. I never, besides the three Tinder dates that I went on, I never swiped right, told her I wanted a boner, and then went to the bar and had sex and it was so transactional. Yeah. So transactional. And I think this is a real...

Or in the instant gratification, too. Where you do, like, with the in-person dating, yeah, you need that time to kind of get the feelings, see if they're there. You need to get people's feelings, you need to catch feelings for them. It's just such a weird world that we live in. And that's why Master can never divorce me ever

Not gonna happen Astrid no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no and the Jeff owns the other 56%. It's 112% of the commercial break. Because that's the math we need to make a make-up. Oh my god. He did chairs to finding the right people. Hey man. Yeah, thank God. Or be stuck with each other. We would. We'd be like watching football on Saturday afternoon. And I'd be like, did they score a basket?

Let's go on over there. Yep. We'd be in that Tinder world trying to figure it all out. And I guarantee we would not figure it out. Yeah, that's not how we're built. No. Alright, listen, I got exciting news for you just in case you're wondering, you can now dial 855-TCB-8383. 855-TCB-8383 is the brand new TCB hotline. What we have still have 661 bestio.

661, the word best, the number two, YOYO, that's 237, 8296, you'll figure it out, but you can also find us at 855, TCB 8383. It's a toll free phone number. That's nice. In case you're overseas and you wanna hit us up, you can do it on the toll free phone number. You can also leave us a message. Tell us about yourself. Questions, comments, concerns, content ideas. We're taking them all at 855-TCB-8383 or 661-Best

the number 2-Y-O-Yo. You can also go to tcbpodcast.com. Don't be surprised it's the old website before the news website. Well, we're getting the old new website new again.com don't be surprised it's the old website before the new website well we're getting the old new website new again so don't worry about it we're gonna it's a good scared add the commercial break on instagram no one cares at tcb at tcb on youtube we now have a youtube handle and tcb all these things changing or youtube.com slash the commercial break if you want to do it the old way uh... christie isB Chrissy on Tinder and I am TCB Brian on Grindr. So find me there. And I don't know, look for my colonoscopy results coming up here.

Let's talk about it. Oh, on the commercial break, you know, I will reveal all. Literally. Okay. Yes you will. Alright, I know it's a short one, but it's a good one. It. Literally. Okay. Yes, you will. Alright, I know it's a short one, but it's a good one. It's a great question. Thanks, Cali.

Chrissy, I guess that's all we can do today. I think so. We talked a lot about our friendship. I love you. I love you. Best of you. Best of you. And best of you out there in the podcast universe.

Until next time. Chrissy and I always say, we do say, and we must say. Bye. next time. Chrissy and I always say we do say and we must say bye!Sai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai you