The Commercial Break - So-So Girls Are No-No Girls!

Episode Date: April 26, 2023

Frankie B...he's the king of 'dating site apps' and the king of relationships, even when he's not in one! He returns to TCB with a misogynistic list of things women sould and should not do on dating apps, and not a shred of it makes sense. Release the Kraken! Krissy is a Below Deck girl Andy Cohen: made in a petri dish for Bravo TCB SuperYacht Frankie B wants to help us optimize our dating apps Whats below you? Not getting laid… "Dating site apps" Frankie hates ponytails! ROLL BACK THE TAPES Garfish? Strong Thumb Frankie No sunflowers and no pets! No pictures with people hotter than you! Frankie B, ladies and gentlemen,…a chauvinist LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us or leaving a voicemail at: 1.855.TCB.8383 Speak to TCB LIVE by calling 775.TCB.LIVE (1.775.822.5483) Tuesday-Thursday 12pm-5pm EST Watch TCB on YouTube Creator: Bryan Green Co-Host: Bryan Green Co-Host: Krissy Hoadley Written By: Bryan Green Exec Producers: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Content Production & Research: Tina Khano YouTube Producer & Editor: Morgan Please Audio Editing: Christina A. Executive Director: Astrid B. Associate Producer: Gustavo Episodic Contribution: Marianne, Diane, Natalie, Will The Champ, Will D** Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Here the dumbest bitch and with the biggest heart, I love, love, love that. I just want to say kudos to you for being a dumb bitch with the biggest heart. Because I love that. On this episode of the Commercial Break. Look at my dumb, look how fat it goes, look at my dumb, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom,! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Is it exciting? Ah, yeah, cats, I can't even welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is Kristen, the Kraken, only.

That's you, Chrissy. That's the two guys. That's the Kraken, it's the Kraken. It's the Kraken. It's the Kraken! I loved that movie. Oh. The Flash of the Titan. Oh, I love that lawyer. What was her name? There was a lawyer that was the cracker. Yeah, don't you remember when all the whatever the thing about the election? Oh, you know, we have to concentrate on some guy one and the other half thought the other guy one and there was some lady screaming on TV. I'm going to release the cracker

And there was some lady screaming on TV. I'm going to release the cracker! But she said Kraken, not Kraken. It's the Kraken. What movies are from? I don't even know. What, release the Kraken? That's from Flash of the Titans. Oh, it is?

Yes, and there was an original one from back, I think, in the 70s or something. And I grew up watching it because my dad liked it, and I loved that movie. Oh, and then they read it. And then they read it. And then dad liked it and I loved that movie. Oh, yeah, I did watch that movie too. And then they redid it. And it was bad. And it was 3D. It was, it's always hard to do. I remember the old one with they had like the clay and clay.

Yeah, but clay, yeah. With the dragon. It was so obviously fake like those old Godzilla movies that I just, I loved when my dad was watching, but as an adult, it's foolishly stupid. Why is where we were talking about earlier the animation that has come so far? It's crazy. We're watching on my TV, there's a constant barrage of kids' cartoons from, you know, all the universes you would expect, Universal and Nickelodeon and Disney. And so they're all basically computer animation now.

Very few of them are hand drawn, if any. And even the hand drawn ones, I think are done by computer may to look like they're hand drawn. Because it's so easy to let a super computer just make these, you know, you just plug in a few spots and you say, hey, make them do this and make them do that. And here's how they're lip should move.

When I was a kid, like, you know, like thunder cats or. Thunder cats. The power of grays go! Oh, he mad and serious. was a kid, like, you know, like thunder cats or... Thunder cats. Yeah. The power of Glasgow! Oh, he mad and serious. Yes, and all the backgrounds were the same. It didn't matter what scene was.

They just had one background, right? They had one background because it was so expensive to make these, the animators to make these and they had to pump them out, like every week they had to pump out another episode, another episode. And all the characters, basically their hands and their heads move and everything else stayed still because it was just too much work. Let's just went up and down.

Yeah, they're lips on. It was. Yeah, you don't know. You kids don't know how good you've got it. Although I do have a small soft spot in my heart for he man and the power of grace go. Sheerah. Oh, sheerah. You look back on that now as an adult from the power of grace girl. Sheer out. Oh, sheer out. You look back on that now as an adult

from the eyes of an adult and you clearly understand that sheer well was not made for children. Sheer out was made for full grown men to ogle and ogle. She basically had the princess lay a return to the Jedi outfit on and man in her boobs would bounce. Like, we really need to have the kids watch boob bouncing boob's. No.

The parents do. Yeah, the parents do. Did you did you watch Love Is Blind? Is the question. No, why? I almost I almost. Jesus, my toe into the water, but I knew you can't dip your toe into Love Is Blind. You got to go ahead first and just get ready to watch 10 episodes Three days

So instead I picked up on below deck where I Watching that they were doing some marathon and those marathons always get me. I can't keep leaving to below I mean far be it for me to actually Criticize bad TV because my own habits are terrible, right? I watched terrible TV. You have no room. But I watched like me for maybe five episodes. I think I was actually down in Miami and I watched it because it was just on in the background. It would happen to be one of the stations that had something on in the hotel room.

But so, do they live there? Yes. So, there's like a few different iterations now of below jack there's the super yacht one That's the original and then there's now like sailing yacht and I feel like there's one other one too But anyways, yes, the crew lives on the yacht for like two months really yeah They do a series of charters. It's usually three days long. And what I love are the asshole guests to come up with. I think there's a little bit of drama

with the below deck people themselves, but I mean, these people that come on to these things that charter these things, it is a case study and whatnot. Oh, absolutely. I can't be a lot of it. And steak and lobster, what, the demands they make are crazy.

These rich people, I mean, I hope someday I get to be rich and be just as much of a dick. No, that's the point. Not being a shimmy asshole. But we will not be dicks. We will not be dicks? Well, that's because we're never gonna be that kind of rich. If we have a plane, like I said, it's's going to be you know red bull puts together that plane competition where

you have to make it out a cardboard I always admit you have to make the plane out of cardboard and then they send them off the ramps I was imagine that's a tcb type plane like you and I in a cardboard just waiting to go but you know that Andy Cohen he is so formulaic he just basically finds one or two people that have super interesting personalities and he piggy fronts a whole series off of it and then he just stamps them out. Is that the fucking Andy Cohen doing that?

It is, it is. I mean, I think he pretty much owns Bravo at this point. He must. He must. I don't know. He certainly does all the reunions and he's great to the reunions. He's got a great personality.

He's meant for, he's like, He is meant for it. He's made in a Peachtree dish for reality television executive producer. He really is. And I do find him highly entertaining actually. Oh, I know me too. Yeah, nothing wrong with a little Andy Cohen.

But these shows that he makes, he just makes one and then he stamps them out. That's it. He just stamps out the next version, the next version. So let me ask you a question. When I went, I forgot where we were. We were somewhere in Italy and we were in a port. And I can't remember which port we were in,

but the world at that time, the world's largest yacht was parked there, right? It was out in the port. And we were taking a boat into this port, and it's much smaller than boat into this port. That's a big bad thing. Well, basically, this is the time to meet. Oh, maybe we were, we were in my orca,

that's where we were. And so, well, my friend had this genius idea when we were in my orca. He says, let's rent a boat and you can drive it because you're good on the water. And I'm like, dude, I'm good on the water when it's like lake plasip. You know what I'm saying?

When everything is glass. Yeah. And there's no problems whatsoever. But in Mallorca, in the Straits of the Mediterranean, where there's seven foot waves on the regular, like I don't want to drive somebody else's boat. I just don't want, not some dinghy. If I was driving a super yacht,

maybe that'd be a different story. So we're driving in and there's the world's largest yacht, which is, it looked like the size of a small cruise ship. It was crazy. It was crazy. Jeff Bezos just had his world's biggest yacht delivered. That's right. That seems like the cat's meow, if you could just have a really nice house floating on the water all the time

and you had a helicopter and you could just fly in and spend a lot of them have helicopter pads and then some of them have submarines. submarines what? and boats all kinds of boats it's not. There are these fucking people of submarine. It's a huge mansion on the water. By the way, no interest in a submarine, zero interest in a submarine.

I don't want to be underwater in a submarine. I want the yacht to be up. I want those, what are those influencer chicks that just hang around? I don't know the answer would like that. But influencer chicks on the back, in the pool, in the glass bottom, and the whole nine yards, if we could do that,

if we could have a TCB yacht. That's what I'm talking about. Yes, but we are going to have to like 10X our audience times 10X times 10X. We'll start with one of those boats that you see on those shows where they go to like the Okie Finochi. A pontoon boat. A pontoon, like my dad's pontoon,

which is basically two pieces, like two old hollowed out metal trash cans, you know, the barrels that the, the, the, the, the, the, the steel or the tin. Yeah, you know, you drive, sometimes you drive downtown and you see a couple guys in the cold, warming their hands. It looks like my dad took two of those, put a cap on the end of it and then just floated it and I think, that thing does not go fast within three miles per hour.

Firm and to go slow. Both comes by and you almost tip over. But my kids love it because you can just run around. But those yachts, they're so fascinating to me. Well, that's what I love to show because I love to see the yachts. I love to see the crazy people that come on them. And then there's some drama with the workers and they're in beautiful locations. I mean, let me heaty and the Mediterranean and their any beautiful locations. I mean, what is it? Let me heat and the Mediterranean and the Caribbean and yeah, when the these yachts,

they're for rent, right? Yeah, well, you chart it. You chart it. Okay. Okay. Sure. Three days. Yeah. They come on board and half the time these people come on board, they're hammered already. Of course. Because they're like, we're on a yacht. Of course. I'll take three bonkers, it was right now for myself. And I've got champagne, all of the stuff. So they do it for, they get on the boat and they've got like two days at sea on the water, doing things, they make the people pull out

those water slides and the toys. I'm not a bunch of fucking, let me explain something. My opinion, my opinion. You know, you know, they say that money cannot make you happy, but money can get you fucked up. It helps.

Yeah, money can get you fucked up and getting fucked up makes me happy. So I think that money can make me happy. They say the time and money is an addict's worst enemy. But if you have all the money and all the time in the world, what, you're not an addict. You're just having fun. Yes.

Yeah. I mean, seriously, like, of course they're fucked up when they get on there. We were in Amelia Island and they have a, they have a harbor down there too. And they have some big yachts that pulled in there because, you know, there's some really nice parts of Amelia Island. And one time there was, I don't know, a hundred foot yacht.

It was huge, right? Five stories. And there were, you don't rare, you rarely, when those things are parked, you rarely see anybody on that. They're usually in town or they're at their house or they're hiding. Silling with their champagne. Yeah, they're hiding from us who might throw tomatoes at them and say, Fuck you and your caviar and genetonic. But these people were out in the back of the yacht and they were drinking and they were

saying, hi to everybody that was waving. There must have been seven people working on that yacht, seven young men working on that yacht. I just, that is the fucking life. I want to be angry with these people, but I know given the opportunity, I would be right in the mix. Given the opportunity, I would own my own yacht and I would school it around the world.

But, you know what a boat is? A boat is just a big hole you throw money into. I mean, having a boat, that's why they charter these yachts, is because when you have a yacht like that, maybe not Jeff Bezos, because he has enough money to maintain it, not worry about it. But let's say you're like,

you just became a billionaire. You're not a qualified billionaire. You just became one. If you just became a billionaire and you bought your 200 foot yacht and you've got 15 rooms and a pool, the glass bottom boat and two jacuzzi's and a hell of a pad or whatever the fuck they call it, if you're that guy or girl, you rent it out when you're not using it because you have to. That makes sense. It's so fucking expensive to take care of a boat and you can't using it because you have to. That makes sense.

It's so fucking expensive to take care of a boat. You can't, it's not only you can just leave a super yacht sitting there for six months while you, you know, there's no parking spaces available for super yachts. So it's always got to be traveling or moving. Do you always have to have people on it? Because it's a cruise ship, essentially. That's why they charter these boats out. And how much do you think it costs to charter one of those boats?

I looked into it too. I looked at it. But it's a very small these boats out. And how much do you think it costs to charter one of those boats? I looked into it too. I looked at it. But it's a very small one. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, I think it's $10,000 a day or something. It was something like that. Yeah. For the super yacht?

Right. Oh, that's not that bad. No, it's been a while since I got to know. Two years of earnings here on the commercial break. Nothing. We could sell the roadcaster and get 15 minutes on a super yacht. We could record like a 15 minute segment from there. I think it'd be well worth the money, don't you?

I do. Oh man. I do, let's budget that in. And I bet there's a lot of fucking going on in those super yachts. Oh yeah. And it's probably not the people who are renting them. It's probably the people who are working on them that are fucking, is that right?

Because the two episodes I watched, there's like a love affair going on in the boat. Oh yeah, of course. If you're in those tight quarters for that long course and that they're hot people, they're young and hot, you know, I've been in tight quarters, but not for that long. No, it seems miserable to me. Oh, man, no thanks. Definitely not what I've been a stinky, you know, bottom of a yard word.

Seaweed and seal shit. And then you go up on the top and you're serving, you know, caviar, like caviar lifestyle. You're down in your 10 by 10 room, a six other people. Yeah, and you go upstairs and there's a 70 by 70 master bedroom with a water bed that showers irony all over you every time you walk in the door.

These fuckers have a water bed, and I'm working downstairs in the water. Go fuck yourself. Yeah, that seems kind of like a miserable job to me. So I guess you would. They're constantly doing laundry. I mean, the laundry that gets tough on these things. That's crazy.

Tows after, towels after. Yeah, let's see nice. This is dishes and laundry. Must be nice. Yeah, must be nice. Must be fucking nice. You know, if I'm one of the owners of those charter, you know, those yachts,

I'm not appreciative of the fact that Bravo's out there filming somebody fucking all over my yacht. You know what I'm saying? They seem like such private people. But then again, you know, a lot of these charter yachts are not owned by people. They're owned by corporations, yeah, and hedge funds and stuff like that,

because they're good money makers. And you know, why not? Throw a super yacht in there. If I have a hedge fund, I'm buying the super yacht. Two weeks a year, I'm taking it out for a spin. Yeah. For us the time, everybody else use it. Yeah.

I just have to keep the grape juice out of my son's hand. That's right. I wonder if my uncle-in-law ever got his car vintage. Did you ever follow up on that? No, he didn't. He never said another word to us, but we also haven't gotten another invite down to Miami. So.

That's her die we're talking. We have to go down to Miami for something. And I was like, yeah, let's set up your uncle. Yeah, and she was like, oh, I haven't heard from him in a while. Maybe not this time. It does a while mean since the last time my son spilled grape juice all over his three and a half million dollar. Yeah, brand new carpet.

But who gets white carpet on a yacht? It looks lovely, but of course he doesn't have children. Yeah. He's probably like you asshole. Oh, now you're gonna make fun of my white carpet? Your kids are ones of wounded. Well, you know, you can have everything in life, Chrissy, but you know what you can have.

What's that? You can have Frankie B, new episode, new video. New video. The finer things in life, Shuffle's kids. I cannot give you a yacht, or it's certainly not a super yacht, but what I can give you is a super putz. I don't have any yachts, but I got a putts. G-SU-B Hey you, guess you. I hate to interrupt all the fun, but I just want to remind you that

tcbpodcast.com is where you find all the audio and the video, plus you can contact us to get your free 21EPM sticker. Just go to tcbpodcast.com, hit the contact us button, tell us you want to stick or drop us your address and off we go. Plus you can write to us at 855-TCB-8383. That's 1-855-TCB-8383 for all of our international listeners. We'll pick up the toll, go ahead and text us. If you have comments, questions, concerns, content ideas, we're taking them all at 855-TCB-8383.

If you want to view the commercial break in a whole new light, go to youtube.com slash the commercial break to see the fully edited episodes. You'll love it or your money back, I promise. While you're at it, hit us up on Instagram at the commercial break and TCB live on TikTok. So let's take a minute to hear from our sponsors and then we'll be back to this episode of the commercial break. And Frankie just popped up with a new video. Oh yeah. I was lucky to have checked his channel last night.

It didn't get a notification. Maybe he's unsubscribed to me directly. He knows, right? He thinks he has to know. So I go there last night on to his channel and there it is, one day ago, this video, and you know what Frankie's talking about now? What's that?

How to optimize your dating app. Everybody's into this now. Everybody has tips and tricks and none of these people are in committed loving relationships. Zero relationships amongst them. Everybody that we review that does this dating profile bullshit, none of them have, you know, any stable relationships in any part of their life, except for Adam the liar and Adam the liar has a steady relationship with two separate women, one of which is pregnant and

the other one which hates the pregnant woman. So it's not a very, it doesn't sound like a great situation going on there. So Frankie is back, love the guy, and how could you not at least take a listen to what you have to say. We have to check in, take a peek under the hood. So I was rolling on the internet. That's huge. As I do do, as I do do. And I caught Frankie telling us about dating apps and how we optimize the profile. Let's take a listen. Man, he's looking old, isn't he? I know he is. Yeah, I feel like we met Frankie as a young,

spry 70 year old. And now he's a not so young and spry 73 year old. In today's video, I want to reach out to all the women who are contemplating going on a dating site app. Conceh plating, contemplating, and he's, this is for women now. He said, constant plating. Uh, yeah, he's making one for women. He's, he's broadening his horizons, Chrissy. It's not all about the guys. I want to be easier, such a success.

Tell you what you should post, and I want to tell you what you most definitely don't want to post. Now, for all the ones who are not on the dating side app, yeah, you're contemplating. Should I get on here? In case you're not on the dating side application, media turn styles, I want to let you know exactly what you need to do.

What is a media act? What is an online media app? It's below me. No, it's not. What's below you is not getting on there. What's below you is it might fall. That's right. Get on them. Get on there. So I can hook up with you. Hey, Chrissy, you know what's below me? My dick. Just a suggestion. Thinking that you're gonna walk into a restaurant. You're gonna walk into a bar. You're gonna walk into a grocery store, and the man in your dreams is gonna fall on your lap.

That's simply not the case. None of us want to be on the dating site yet. But the dating site apps. What the fuck is he talking about? Not if it's gonna be there. You're never gonna find anybody unless you go on Grindr. Look at these beautiful women I found on Grindr. They got jaw lines that are really strong, but look at these beautiful women.

Fortunately, they are a good source of meeting people. You're going to meet people that you wish my God I never met him, but you're also going to meet people that you're gonna say you know what? This was the best move of my life And you're gonna meet lots of people who try and murder you a few You'll have to get restraining orders against and probably a number of which are going to scam you for dollars But every once in a while you'll come up on somebody and go oh, I'd like to have coffee with them if they ever responded. Also, the women who are already in these sites, we need the talk. There's a lot of you that got

this all wrong. So between the women who are thinking about getting on these sites and the women who are on these sites, Let's roll into this video. Oh my god. Well, let's roll after all of the videos that we've watched of Frankie B. I would have never expected this kind of turn to a POV for a woman. Yeah. Because of any of the people that we have, I mean, listen, I think certainly John Anthony is probably the worst man I would have.

I wouldn't want him within 50 miles of my daughters. But Frankie B's not exactly the top of the list of people I want. No, he's a total massagerist. He's whimmed. Is that a new car? No, it's same car he's always had. Same car, same golf swing.

Same fitness video. Yeah. Same girlfriend walking down the beach. Wow. Me. He paid. Yeah. Oh, he definitely paid. All right. She's like just going everybody in love. Yeah. She's got, she's got a big huge hat on. You can't see her face. No, he's your body. Yeah. Yeah. Why look at her face. What's up there that I'm interested in? she's your body. Yeah. Yeah. Why look at her face? What's up there that I'm interested in. That's right. Frankie does his audience.

To my channel. If this is your first time here, my name is Frank Bernardo. Now, normally, my channel is geared for all guys who want to up their game, look and feel better about themselves in grooming fitness fashion in lifestyle. But today, I want to reach out to the women because sometimes it's nice to get an opinion. Normally, 100% of my audience is guys over 55 years old, all 3000 of my subscribers, but today I want to reach out to the women, none of which subscribed to my channel, so why am

I wasting my fucking time? Did I just say? Yes, I know. I'm saying true. And of a guy out there, a regular guy who is actively on the dating sites, all right? And I see what's going on out there. And who was so successful? Yeah.

I mean, I think I would take advice from a guy who is in a happily committed relationship that he found online on Tinder or the dating media. Yes. So far, all we've heard from Frankie is how miserable his dating life is. So yeah, okay. I'm actively in this. So I just want to give you my personal opinion on the dues and doves, which you should post and what you shouldn't post on

these dating side apps. And if you like this content, do me a favor. Give the video a like. It's only gonna help my channel grow and don't forget to subscribe. So yes, even you grow. I'm just only gonna help my dick grow. I was just watching him.

I was thinking, do you think everybody in his life knows that he does this? He's not a business, this is just his for fun, you know, but he's just giving these tips. Yeah, clearly he's not making money on this channel. Like there's not enough views. I mean, he's so far below the amount of views you would have to make a good living doing this.

Do I think everybody in his life knows this? No, because I think this is why, at one point, all of the dating content went off the channel because he was dating somebody who probably figured out that he was this creep on my make-you-be-shitty videos. So I don't think he leads with, I am Frank Bernardo from YouTube. I am FrankyB from YouTube.

You may have seen me in such videos as, why are the bitches sweating my balls? How do you tune in, double-deck? And how to fuck your third ex-wife. Girls, don't miss my upcoming videos. So obviously, the first thing everyone sees when scrolling through the dating apps, it's going to be your picture. We're going to call it your profile picture. Now, because that's what it's actually called.

We're going to call it for, for example, purposes. Yeah, here in this video, we're going to call it a profile picture. And when I say go to a website, I mean a URL. Now, what it's really called, this is what we're going to talk about it today like that. That picture has got to be your absolute best photo bar none. Don't have your hair in a ponytail if that's not your best look. Hold on, hold on, hold on. I'm remembering that Frankie did a version of this in another video. As part of another. he said specifically roll back the tape Christina or Morgan because he said specifically Do not put your best picture up there. You need to look like you do on a regular basis Show the world what you look like don't leave men guessing

What it Frankie when did you turn into oh a n? I mean come on man Give us the truth You know if you're holding up this big giant garfish, okay a big fish That's not gonna work for you if you have beer here. What's a Garfish? First of all, what's a Garfish? Please say a car fish or a garbage? Wait. Is I like Garfield?

I'm not even sure what a Garfish is. I don't know either, but I mean, I'm not all the dating habits, but I imagine that's probably not the first thing that the women are putting up is the molting of a Garfish. No. When they're hearing about each other. Well, you think that, and then I Google Garfish, and it's all women holding Garfishes.

Ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha. Oh, again. Oh, again. That's not gonna work for you. If you got, did you close on? That's not gonna work for you. You always gotta remember, what you post

is what you're going to attract. Now, it's crazy. So, you post a Garfish. Maybe you want this one? Expect a lot of the following. Oh my gosh, it's so wonderful. These two new guys slid into my DMs. A Garfish.

How lucky am I? A clock break. This may sound. If you are looking for the man of your dreams on this site, go get your photos professionally taken. It does. This is not the first time we're hearing this. Everybody now is saying. Everybody saying get your photos professionally taken. It's not the first time we're hearing this. Everybody now is saying.

Everybody's saying that your photos professionally taken. Luckily, Chrissy and I have had now two professional photo shoots. So, yeah, oh three professional photo shoots. So when Jeff and Astrid leave us, probably sooner rather than later because of this stupid fucking show, at least we'll have the profile picture. Well, let's check. Done. Yeah, done.

I got a great looking photographs. I just need a garfish to throw in there. All the difference in the world. And it'll show your true beauty. Again, absolute best photo is that profile picture. So congratulations, you guys. Got someone to start scrolling down your page. First of all, that's a tremendous feat. It really is. Like for instance, when I say you have tremendous feet, what is a tremendous feat? What are you gladiator? I'm on the site and? It's a tremendous feet. What is? What are you a gladiator?

I'm on the side and I'm looking at the girls, okay? I know just this quick. Just that quick. Boom, I look at the picture. Look at my thumb. Look how fast it goes. Look at my thumb. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.

And then sometimes I'm like this. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what I'm saying? Look how fast my wrist is. You see that? That's because I wake up early, 3.4545 every morning and I go knock one out real quick See my thumb see my thumb here's my fist. Here's my fist. I'm eating what a dick He's like most of time all these I'm just swiping

It's like it's my no no no no no because you know Frankie opens up his age got gab from like you know 14 to 74 right? gap from like, you know, 14 to 74, right? Yes. That's anybody and everybody. And I can, it's like, one split second, if I like her look or not, okay? That's how important that first picture is, because that's obviously gonna get your guy

to scroll down and look at more pictures and read what you have to say about yourself. So what are the right pictures to start adding into your profile? Well, I'm gonna tell you what you need to eliminate, you know, for eliminating all this silly pictures like you and your dog, you on a night nature, try, high girl, whatever you girls are into. Ditz, that's what you got to show. Show left it, right? That's right. I want to see your labia and at least one of those pictures. I'm unknown reason women love

putting pictures of of these sunflowers feels of sunflowers. I don't care about the freaking sunflowers. I don't have time for sunflowers. I'm looking for sun pussy. That's what I'm looking for. Who gives that shit about your flowers? I need to see you shining your asshole. Chrissy, I'm not looking for Sun flowers. I'm looking for D flowers. You know what I'm saying? Yes, I want to see your taint.

Let's get right into it. Watch your photo, picture. Care about Sun flowers, is eating them, okay? They're seeds, that's all I care about. I don't want to see that. Shh Frankie, you're Mr. Sensitive today, aren't you? Yeah. He's single again, by the way. No make-up on, five o'clock shadow, gray hair streaking through his head. Yeah.

And men don't want to see that. You're wasting valuable footage of yourself. Another picture that I do not want to see, is that I'm't want to see that. You're wasting valuable footage of yourself. Another picture that I do not want to see are a picture of your dogs. I don't care about your dogs. Again. I don't care.

Wow. First thing I'm gonna do is. But you care about animals. That's right, Chris. Fuck that. First thing I'm gonna do, put your dog in the oven. It's the first thing I'm gonna do. I gotta get rid of the dog. gonna do put your dog in the oven. It's a first thing I'm gonna do Gotta get rid of the dog. I

Don't mean kill it in the oven. I mean shut it up in the oven If I were fucking dog or your son flower next thing show me the dance. Yeah show me more Tiss next picture I can't stand these pictures of you and your mom Who's cocking cares? I don't want to see your mom that old crinkly lady Get rid of your mom mom's got to go I Want to see photos of you. I didn't come to this site for your dogs I came to the site for you. I realized that you're a dog lover. There's a lot of dog lovers out there I'm a dog lover out there. But all of that will

take you are. I don't think you are. Never seen you with a dog. How do you have time for a dog? You're either in that broom closet, razor-riring people's faces, or you're making stupid fucking videos, or you're driving your car in circles in the public parking lot. Working out for three hours a day. Well, that you that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that and show pictures of yourself. Which dogs are in their cage? It's not a lizard, it's a dog. It's a dog in the cage. Leave the dog in the cage. Oh my God, I mean. Another, yeah.

What if somebody's not a dog lover? Well, and then all of a sudden, you pop up with the dog in the cage. Put the dog in the cage. Bitch. I don't have a dog. You don't. What about your mom? See around. But her back of the cage. You most definitely shouldn't that post just pictures of the city or surrounding areas. Again, these are all pictures that are meaningless to the everyday

man out there. So do yourself a favor. Only post pictures of yourself. And if you do want to post pictures of a dog, make sure that you're in that picture with the animal. Sounds like Frankie got burned by a tender profile that he matched with, was just pictures of Labrador Retrievers. And then he showed up. And it was, it was like, I don't know, Sean Array or something. Photo, no, no, and I like to call this a photo blunder. You never post a group picture as your main picture.

You and two of your girls, okay, I agree with this one. You never post the, yeah. Because then it becomes hard to determine who the person is and you have to go do more investigating. Yeah, no, I know. That's like, When I was swiping on Tinder last night, I hated those group photographs.

Friends, you know, nine times out of 10, two of the girls are very pretty and there's one that is just like, so-so. So when I'm looking at that first picture, it's like okay which girl's actually on this profile. Yeah okay which so girl. Yeah which so so. Which uh which one of the two three hundred pound ladies are you? Wow. Frankie you're the worst right now dude. You're the worst when you're not with a girl.

I mean, is she with a hot one? Not, hot or not? You got the perky tits or the saggy tits? Which tits are you? That's what I'm wondering. If I have to go investigate which pair of tits are yours, I'm out. Let's do much work.

Do much work. Actually, we screw down, we figure out who it is and nine out of ten times at least in my viewing It's always been the social girl. I got excited thinking it might be one of these those my nickname in high school the so-so guy Hey, so-so guy There's a girl with one eyeball over here and he's a prom date. We call her arg. Hey, why are you and so and so good? Why are you and so so good together?

I mean, he is out of control. Nine times out of ten, it's the so, so girl. That's it. I won't do girls. All girls only. That's so, so girl sounds like a Gwen Stefani song from the early 2000 You're so mad and your tiggas and Flamie your ass is big and flammy your tall asses begin flammy I'm the so-so-so girl You're just a so-so girl

To other women in unfortunately it was the social girl So if you want to take a group picture, slide that down the register a little bit and And then I'll also slide down my poll a few times You know what I want pictures from your last, from your last Gino exam. That's what I need. I mean, can I get it? I mean, I get even straight to, okay, so no pony tail pictures.

No pony tails. No pony tail, but no dingy clothes pictures, which I don't know who's done that. I mean, hopefully. Well, listen, if you're but no dingy close pictures, which I don't know who's done that. I mean hopefully Well listen if you're putting on dingy I mean What he would he thinks of as dingy clothes may not all be dingy clubs. Yeah, so there's that okay No pictures of flowers. No pictures of dogs. No pictures of buildings. No no scenery. Don't take any city pictures

You just and only if you're hot and only if you're hot and zoom in on your tits There's a building, no scenery, nothing pictures. Just you. Just. And only if you're hot. And only if you're hot. And zooming on your tits. And do you do anal? Are you anal positive? Or are you against or are you pro anal? Or anti anal?

Is maybe don't take a picture with people who are more beautiful than you because they're grabbing the attention. That's not what you want. You want to grab the attention. There's a lot of things that I look for and I'm sure a lot of guys do this too. Now, when I... I bet there's a long, long list of things you're looking for Frankie But what you get I imagine is what you take

Come on Frankie. Let's be realistic. You're 65 or so you say 63 65 what are those? You're not the world's worst looking guy. You're certainly in shape You've taken care of yourself everything except from the neck up, which is just a piece of Leather but like it looks like a leather bound book. But you're not exactly like Brad Pitt either. So I don't know that you can come from on high and make these incredible asks of people of women. I never would have the fuck they want. It works for them. It works for them. Scrolling through your profile and all your pictures. I'm dissecting them. I'm taking those pictures. I'm blown it up because I'm zooming in on your. I'm zooming

in on your. That's right. Are you one of these girls has a lot of cleavage? Yeah. Yeah. You know, crazy dissecting. You know, there's some girls who have close cleavage and there's some girls who have big cleavage and there's some girls who have big cleavage You know, I'm saying like they got a little big chest bone right there. Those girls automatically out The fuck happened to your chest get out of here This guy Malt sometimes Frankie just broke up with somebody no doubt. No doubt he's on the side. Yeah, he's on the board

He's got in burn by somebody who's done the things that he's talking about. This is Frankie at his best and at his worst. If I'm being honest. His best is his worst. Yeah. His worst is our best. Exactly.

The worst he gets, the better we feel. The better we do in the studio. While he's that I want in a woman, whatever you do, don't fudge your pictures. And I'm talking Photoshop. Okay, don't do that. Because always remember this coming from the guy who's putting barbed wire in his face. And he just said get a professional photographer. You don't think a professional photographer is going to touch up your photograph. Yeah. Number one, number two, this is coming from the most vain human being in the world.

He literally put bar wire in his face to give him an extra six months younger look. Yeah. Unbelievable. Gonna have to meet that guy someday. and if you don't look like that photo You're instantly gonna be off the charts with him, okay? And it's just gonna turn into a bad date and it's gonna go wrong Don't get your best photo forward then don't put your best for no He said this in a previous video don't put and you know what I agreed with that I think you put the everyday natural yeah natural yeah. Natural. Not a right out straight out of bed. No, no. Right, but maybe out of the shower, right out of the shower.

Yeah, maybe you were going for a night out. Going for a night out, that's a good one. Or you head into the mall to buy some clothing. And you, you know, I don't know, you're dressed in your dingy clothes and your burlap sack. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, with your dog and toe with your scraggly ass dog and toe

and a fair of dillock Martin's wire hair dog and his son flowering your hair son flowering your hair the dog's got one snag it's coming out of his lips. Ah, ah, ah eliminated all the garbage pictures I want to call them, what other kind of photos should you post of yourself? Garbage. What garbage pictures? I want to take a picture of your refrigerator. I want to make sure it's well stocked with tuna. Eggs. Oh my God. And more pictures of your dance. Oh my God. Our men looking for.

I'm going to tell you what I'm looking for. Okay, okay, okay. What is he looking for? We'll get into it. And a follow-up episode, next episode. We'll get you that Frankie B. And what he's looking for. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I know that you hate the cliffhangers. I know you hate it when we have to break up these videos into two separate episodes, but we also can't be here forever.

See, what do you want me to do? You want me to stay in the studio for another 15 minutes? I got shit to do! I gotta go count all the money I'm making here at the commercial ring. Yeah, you gotta go update your profile pictures. I do. The only guys on the website, the new new website, the fourth new website. I promise we'll get back to it next episode. I also want to show the audience this dating show that I had, that I found where they dropped through the bottom of the floor.

We're gonna do that. So next episode, Frankie B. Trapped Door, all coming at you, you can go to tcbpodcast.com. If you want to watch this episode on video, it's all there, all the audio, all the video right there from one location, tcbpodcast.com. You can also hit the contact us button, get your free 21 EDM sticker from us to you, just drop your address in that contact us tell us you want to sticker. Also, youtube.com slash the commercial break, please go there, like and subscribe, like on your favorite videos, subscribe to the channel if you would, and full episodes edited

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All right, Chrissy, well you know as I do say, that's all I can do. I think so, Brian. So I will tell you that I do love you. I love you. And best you. Best to you. And best of you. Best of you. And why not?

Best of you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I always say. We do say and we must say. Good bye. Good bye. I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man