The Commercial Break - TCB...It's Not For Everybody!

Episode Date: June 29, 2022

Frankie B, the long time foil of TCB has been retired. The listeners chime in to let Bryan know they are not happy. TCB is the #1 Apple Podcast in Canada right now and everyone is wondering...HOW is that even possible?! Finally, Bryan and Krissy share and oral history of the first 50 episodes of TCB with some audio clips to guide the discussion. It was a hot mess the first time around...it is again. LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us or leaving a voicemail at: 1.855.TCB.8383 Lululemon.com is for people who like comfort! Watch Us on YouTube Creator: Bryan Green Co-Host: Bryan Green Co-Host: Krissy Hoadley Written By: Bryan Green Exec Producers: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Content Production & Research: Tina Khano YouTube Producer & Editor: Morgan Please Audio Editing: Christina A. Executive Director: Astrid B. Associate Producer: Gustavo Episodic Contribution: Marianne, Diane, Natalie, Will The Champ, Will D** Huge Thanks To Our Supportive Listeners, Friends, Family & Spouses: Astrid & Jeff!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

On this episode of the commercial break... Bigger people and all. Bigger people and all. You know, the president of Condé Nasté. Condé Nasté is never going to listen to the commercial break. Isn't it Condé Nasté? I don't know what it is. Chrissy, why you ask?

It's a fact news or fiction, and one minute or less. Kondaynasty. Yeah. I can't do that. Now, Kondaynasty, they probably have a sign in the door. Do not turn on the commercial break. But Kondaynasty, they're all about the commercial break. This is how not to start a podcast, ladies and gentlemen.

Let me give it to you. So Brian's thought the most interesting thing in the world that everybody would certainly be into is if I did four different introductions to the podcast and come on, to get. You'll hear the bones of a commercial break episode in here. But they're like Nico's bones. They're rattling around in this spell real bad.

You know, we really hadn't heard from anybody except for people we know about the show. We were like, yeah, listen to your podcast. Yeah. And that's it. It's not for everybody. Listen to your show. We write it's not for everybody, but you know.

It freaks me. You know, I'm sure there's somebody out there who listens to it. The next episode of the commercial break starts now This is the director of cock-to-pay productions Kristen show you Best you guys are you right? The podcast universe how the hell are you? Thanks for joining us on yet another episode of this the commercial break back Oh, boy, oh boy, and best of you, Cruzy. That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite!

That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite!

That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite!

That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! That's a U-Brite! I feel like I need one. Oh, yeah. So in machine tiny little tiny little tiny. It's not that small, jeez. I'm gonna put in my first order because I went directly to the bathroom after our episode

the other day. What color hair would you like? I changed myself. Well, I'm gonna go with this thing. Yeah. I have a friend and he went he went on vacation to over to the Europe and went to Greece and it goes for a month like 28 days or something like that. Nice.

And when he leaves, I saw him. And he was like me. He had a beard, and there might have been like a gray hair here or there, right? Yeah. Kind of that look that a man of a certain age start getting. Like, some guy didn't get it in their 30s, but I was like, oh, I noticed it on him. Because I know his face very well. A good friend of mine for many years. So I was like, oh, I noticed it on him because I know his face very well. A good friend of mine for many years. So I was like, oh, you got a few gray hairs there.

He comes back the other day and I just happened to catch him in the car wash parking lot. He's in the same car wash as I am. And he is completely gray. Like completely gray. The beard went completely gray in 28 days. And in a vacation. Usually you see that with the presidents.

Like, like, their center center. That's true. Yeah, Obama really, he went through. But anyway, so I was like, yeah. Holy shit, this is gonna happen to me. And I need a cock to pay for when I go gray. Because I'm not gonna wanna go gray. I'm gonna wanna go fire engine red.

Yeah, okay. I'll make that for you. You know, there's Instagram filters where they make your hair a certain color? Well, I have any hair, so I can't get that. So I just take it and I'll make that for you. You know, there's Instagram filters, will they make your hair a certain color? I don't have any hair, so I can't get that. So I just take it and I put it on my cock. And I'm like, oh, there it is, fire engine red. That looks good.

Fire engine red or bleach blonde, one of those two. And the drapes will completely not match the car. You go with both. Go both. Should I go like, you can change them out? You can change them out. You can change them out. Like a Ronald McDonald cocktail, baby.

But one day you might be feeling red. That's to me. One day you might be feeling red. That's true. The next day you might be feeling blonde. Maybe I'm emo and I'll go purple. Yeah, purple and that. I could go just jet black. Yeah. And look like Frankie who walks down the street.

Some people have already contacted us letting us know that they're disappointed by our decision to let Frankie go. Yeah, well. You gotta, you gotta, you gotta move on sometimes. Supply and demand. Here's the thing. What we need to do is let Frankie go. Yeah, well. You gotta move on sometimes. Supply and demand. Here's the thing. What when you do is let the demand a build up.

Yeah, build up. We need some inflation on Frankie. They do. They do. It is a Frankie inflation, it's what we do. Because the truth is, if we don't let it go, we'll never push ourselves past doing Frankie B episode. I mean, it's good stuff.

It's low hanging fruit. It is good stuff, but I feel like too much of a good thing then becomes too much of a good thing. Yeah, we can't be the Frankie. No, I don't want to be, you know, TC Frankie B. TC F. TC F. F.

F. So sorry guys, it's done. It's done for now. Done for now. Done for now. That's all I got to say, keep on writing in though. The more we hear about it, the more likely I am to do an episode. So if I got enough people that text me,

which is probably the equivalent of three people that text me, I'll probably go right back to Franky B. I know it's gonna happen. Tomorrow I'm gonna get on that fucking YouTube. It's gonna be like four new, Franky B video. I always see you do another travel line. I gotta get your car card when you're 50. Yeah, if he does it, he has a couple of travel ones,

but he took them off too. And so now I'm wondering, I'm just wondering, I think he got trolled a couple times, possibly by TCB fans. Possibly. I'm not claiming that I don't think you guys for sure did it, but I'm pretty sure you did it. Because you were like using my exact words on the videos,

comment section. So I'm pretty sure. You were like using my exact words on the videos Comment section So I'm pretty sure Franky and or his girlfriend made him take it down I think his girlfriend made him take down the the ones about being single and all that because it was just horrible shitty and very advice Jeff but not you wouldn't do it you would date Frankie V No, it's just the opposite You wouldn't date Frankie B. No. Jeff's the opposite of Frankie. He's the Frankie B antidote.

If you watch a Frankie B video, you just want a reality check. Call Jeff, don't let you know. Yes, exactly. He's uncle Jeff. Yeah, pro 10 feminists over there. Jeff is such a nice guy. You would never put out a,

I don't think Jeff could get that angry. No. To be honest with you. No, this is not in his personality. I think I could do a Frankie B video. Like if I got worked up enough, I think I could get that angry to be honest with you. No, this is not in this personality. I think I could do a Frankie B video. Like if I got worked up enough, I think I could sound that as holy and, but Jeff, no, never. So, 200 episodes and I got COVID

and then we all hidden a hole for a little while and then we come back and I just wanna update the listener out there, you out there. I don't know what's happening. I don't know what happened. I don't know what's happening. I don't know what happened. I don't know what's happening. I don't wanna talk about this ad nauseant because I'm sure nobody fucking wants to hear about this.

But we yesterday ended up being the number one, not comedy podcast, not improv comedy podcast, the number one podcast in all categories. All podcasts. So we're talking about Conan O'Brien, smart list, the daily MSNBC, Rachel Matt, all podcasts in Canada. Now, I'm not particularly sure. I don't know, but I should have pointed out,

I think we're fostering great international relations. Yeah. You know? Trudeau and Biden gave it a go. But now it's up to T.C.V I call for open borders Whatever who cares I Want to normalize relations. Thank you can't it. Whoever you are, wherever you are, we love you.

It's probably like one more person that started with hands. Yeah, I think that's what it is. I mean, clearly we're not the most trafficked podcast in Canada. It cannot be true. If it is, then Canada's podcast scene is really anemic. Because it's the 15 people in Toronto that listen to us us brought us all the way to the top of the charts Yeah, but Apple has their own algorithm. We don't really know we all guess, but you know, it's a big We enjoyed looking at it. Yeah, it's fun. It's a prize. It's a prize. It doesn't really help us in any meaningful way

But we do love Canada. We absolutely love Canada. Give me a double double in a two four. Do you know what a double double is? Double double in basketball? No, no, no, no, no. That's a triple triple. I think the double double. It's a triple double. The triple double. That's a cheeseburger at burger.

A double double is they have a famous gas station chain up there and then the cup of coffee that you would call a double double. Get a double double. And so apparently that's the thing you do a double double and then they say pick up a two four on the way, which is a suit case full of beers. A two four.

A two four, okay, got it. A two four beers, right? Pick up a suitcase. And then I was reading up all about this because you know, the second- I'm not gonna get a British Columbia. I couldn't fucking sleep last night because I saw this, you know, number one in anything.

I mean guys, there's no podcast, I mean, guys, there's, there's no podcast. I mean, I'm sure there are podcasts awards, but they're on podcast magazine. Like who the fuck reads the podcast magazine, right? But, you know, so everyone's in a blue moon. You said they're like the, the webbies are the netbies. There's no, we got, we got someone, I guess guess nominated us for a webby. But then the webby comes after you for like $6,000 to be a part of the program.

Very similar situation here in Atlanta with Atlanta magazine. Oh yeah. You have been awarded this award. You're a top doctor. Yeah, you're a top doctor. $16,000 for a page read. But in order for us to tell other, you're a top doctor. 16,000 dollars for a page read. But in order for us to tell other people

you're a top doctor, we're gonna have to take some money for it. Now I love Atlanta Magazine, but. We all love Atlanta Magazine. Coming from the advertising world. Coming from the advertising world. And then you're on Delta. And they always put it on the back of the Delta seats. Oh, they could stuff.

Wonderful, great. But it's kind of, and I'm not, listen, the Webby Awards find, I know there's just a lot of prestige around that. I've actually worked for not, listen, the Webby Awards find, I know there's just a lot of prestige around that. I've actually worked for companies that have one actual Webby Awards. Yeah. But I'm just not sure what the angle is there.

Like, I have no chance of winning a Webby Award. No artist in the right mind is gonna listen to the commercial break and think that's a cherished treasure week. After. Do a award. You have to award it. It's like, there's no one on earth

that thinks that commercial break should be awarded anything. Not even me, I don't even think that night created. So, I don't know what the angle is there. It's so much money to then go through the nomination process and you're amongst thousands of thousands. And whether or not you even get listened to by the judges, it's a whole nother thing.

And it's like Shakira and Charlemagne the God. I mean, it's like a bunch of, I don't know that those are actually the people, but it's people like that. It's bigger people than us. It's bigger people than us. And like, you know, the, you know, the president of Kanday Nastey.

Kanday Nastey is never gonna listen to the commercial brand. Isn't it Kanday Nast? I don't know what it is. Chrissy, why are you asking me? Fact news are fiction in one minute or less. Kanday Nastey. Yeah.

I can't. Now, Conday nasty. Now, Conday nasty will never, they probably have a sign in the door, you know, do not turn on the commercial break, but Conday nasty, they're all about the commercial break. I'm starting my own company called Conday Nasty. And in the halls, when you walk in the door

and the lobby, if you're sitting to wait for the meeting, with them some important meeting interview for your new position in the door and the lobby, you're sitting to wait for the meeting, with them some important meeting and interview for your new position as the director of nastiness, you're gonna, all you're gonna hear is a commercial break-fuckus. Interspourst with Janet Jackson, nasty. Nasty boys. Don't mean the thing.

Bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, and dink, dink, dink, dink, dink, dink, dink. Nasty boys. We got a new video editor, right? Someone did, okay. That's right, she's amazing and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, but because Jeff a long time ago wrote a review as Morgan. Oh, really? On Amazon. And for our podcast.

Not just in general, but for the review. So now whenever we have like a wish list of things on Amazon, it pops up as Morgan. And so Kelly must have told us like who is Morgan? Or the Morgan's. Like it's Jeff. Yeah, it's Jeff the Morgan. Okay, Morgan.

So Morgan is coming on board and we're in the process of integrating and I went through a pretty thorough vetting process because I knew that, you know, we had to take our game from like zero to a negative point. We just, I don't want to go up one step. Yeah. She brought it like five steps in 15 minutes. She did. But I went through the vetting process

and I didn't say much to any of the people that we were talking to because, and only because I know that a certain type of person is gonna, you have to be a certain type of person, you're gonna have to listen to a lot of the commercial. It's true. And the only other person on earth who's gonna hear more of my voice than me is Morgan.

And I just feel like I'm like Morgan, you got to. You might want to have a couple other people in them in your pocket. Yeah, I mean, she's gonna last a week. Yeah. One lovely, lovely human, she's gonna last a week. I'm gonna say something to a fender. Sure, I probably already just did.

She's not gonna go to like, not fuck this guy. I don't want to be talked about on there. I don't want my family to know. I'm not that I'm a 60 hit artist. The just job is the video editor of the commercial break. I always feel like my neighbors are looking at me sideways, too, sometimes. Like, we'll put out an episode.

And like, now my neighbors, I should say, my neighbors are wonderful. We actually hit the neighbor, the neighbor lottery. They're incredible. But on one side of the house, on the other side of the house, that's so much. But on one side of the house, on the other side of the house that's so much, but on one side of the house are incredible. But-

Don't you have weeds on the other side? Yeah, I got weeds, but you know, through the weeds. I don't know what's going on over there. It's a constantly dog barking dog. Some guy, they probably, this is probably what my neighbor behind me thinks of me because it's the constantly barking dog and some, shut the fuck up!

And then I think that's all I'm doing in this house 24 hours a day is running Jason Blue. Shut up! Shut up! So, you know, sometimes I go to like, I'll go to a school function with the kids and we went to a party one time, like a pool party, backyard pool party, you know I'm talking about you know one of those, the parents, kids, you know, towards constant chaos and someone, you know, you're always afraid that you're one second from some child drowning.

So at least me, I'm real nervous about, I have a pool in my backyard and I'm always so hyper vigilant, but then you put 50 of them in the same fucking general area and they're all upside down and they're blue, blowing bubbles and dragging each other down to the bottom. Anyway, I went to this, and I just, I don't know, there was just a couple that was like

staring at me from the, they, side eye the second that I walked in. And the first question the guy asked is like, so what do you do? I'm like, you know what I do, Jackass? It's already around the school. They put it in the newsletter. Brian Green still listened to the commercial break

with children in the car in Spanish. I feel like maybe we need a promo show that we can just put out there that's like a safe show. Oh yeah, yeah, you know, maybe we should maybe we should do like a safe for work version of the commercial break. Just something. How long average are our show? I think our average show is like 56 minutes or something. It would make it really boring and then people are like, yeah, then I don't want to do it. I'll just have you know know, Gustavo or somebody cut out all the offensive parts, and it'll be literally be the intro and the exits. It'll literally be, welcome to this episode

of The Commercial Bragg. The fact news are fixed in the 30 seconds or less. Bye! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Oh!

Well, anyway, so Canada number one, thanks guys. We appreciate it. If you're on board and you're listening from Canada, welcome. Canada was one of the first early signs of life for this podcast. Early adopters. Yeah, they were early adopters because let's get into it.

We're gonna do a little history of the commercial break right now. Yes. Okay, I thought it was time to reflect. Genue reflect, if you will, at the altar of the commercial break. When we've been through the story a million times, so I'm not going to go through every inch of it because I'm sure that people have been listening to this podcast for a while. I've probably heard this more than they care to, but Chrissy and I started the commercial

break during the right is the pandemic hit. I was going to do a podcast about commercial real estate. I decided that was a play played. I'm no longer working in commercial. We're gonna say to the kids here at the idea about how things are going. So basically, Chrissy and I, I didn't wanna do a podcast by myself, at least not at first. I needed somebody to bounce stuff off of. It's really hard to be funny when you don't know what you're saying is funny.

And I'm not sure it is anyway, but at least they're Chrissy and I. But so I asked her to come on board. We laugh at each other. Yeah, I asked her to come on board as a guest for the first two episodes or three episodes. And here we are. Yeah, she's been here for 350 hours of content later, she's still here.

So that's how the podcast got started. You got to understand. And her best friends for years, lady and I. Oh, yeah, we and Chris and I know each other and we worked on the business side of radio and then occasionally we snuck up into the studio and acted the idiot. Occasionally we went on air and then got kicked directly off air and then stuck up again, and then we're like doing a little pirate radio thing in our, one of the clear channel studio. So April 15th, 2020, is the day that we actually sent out our first episode.

Wow. And I went back and looked and it was recorded. It was recorded on April 11th So four days later than we released our first episode. I think we've won We first released four days to get at the courage Is it we four days to ponder now was the right time to blow up my entire life? Figure that's the pandemic quite blow up my entire life. I figured out that's the pandemic, why not? Why not?

And we're under the world. It turns out. Yeah. I think it did take some time. And as you're about to hear, part of the reason why maybe it took so long is because I just didn't have a good grasp of what I wanted the show to sound like at all.

So. I'm laughing at it. At some points, these episodes are coming down. So you I'm laughing at some point. These episodes are coming down. So you go get your taste of them now because the first 20 episodes of this show, while there are funny moments, are pretty rough around the age. Starting with, not the least of, is the fact that Chrissy and I are recording on some sub-zoom level recording equipment that two guys in a basement made.

It's just the audio quality is horrible not to mention uh I had a a microphone that is generally considered the worst microphone in podcast history I bought it for a thousand dollars everybody goes that's the worst one there I know a literally article's out there five steps of being a podcaster don't buy this microphone I bought it I'll show them So The one that you threw to me like this is

This is that stupid one I had on a stand Oh, okay, and they call it Omni directional which means basically it takes all of the noise from the room that throws it right into the microphone. What'd you hear in just a second? So I drove to Chris's house at the time of the pandemic. Now, remember, everyone's... Beginning. Yeah, this is like the first week of the pandemic, like lockdowns.

And I literally de-sanitized a plastic bag. We had masks and gloves. That's a plastic bag. I had a, you know, a pool net with a 10 foot extension and I put it out the window and it had to Chrissy a microphone because she didn't have any recording equipment and I knew enough to know that we can't do this on a computer microphone because I had heard those versions of podcasts a lot you still you I think we even tried it like with my just my airpods or my it was awful yeah yeah it was actually actually you know what? The first episode is air pods.

Yes. The first episode is air pods, and then I think for the second episode, we decided that, that's shit, it's just shit. I don't even know why we put this episode out. We should have just waited, and just gone to this, we should have just prepared ourselves a little bit. Sometimes you gotta just jump in.

Yeah, I get it, so. I have been waiting a long time, and so, here we go, you wanna hear it? You wanna hear it? Yeah, I think so. So I have been waiting a long time. And so here we go. You wanna hear it? You wanna hear it? Yeah, I think so. I don't know. I think so. This is how not to start a podcast, ladies and gentlemen.

Let me give it to you. So Brian thought the most interesting thing in the world that everybody would certainly be into is if I did four different introductions to the podcast in the whole together. You'll hear the bones of a commercial break episode in here. But they're like Nico's bones. They're rattling around and they smell real bad.

Nico's my dead dog, the Hawks are at the house. The commercial break would now like to introduce the commercial break. You can visit TCB online at tcbpodcast.com. All the latest in online technology available right there on one web page. Video, audio and information. Still using a rotary phone? No problem. Leave a message on the voicemail machine at 661-237-8296. That's 661 best, the number two yo! Kids get your pants permission before calling

Sandard Messaging rates to apply! Go to the Inner Web and look up Instagram.com. Look for the monocle. That's the search function and type in that little funny at sign, the commercial break. Click follow and watch the magic of the internet come alive. If you'd like to see all of the commercial breaks home movies, they're now digitized for the information age at youtube.com. Slash the commercial break.

And remember whenever you need a break choose the commercial break We'll be right back to this episode of the commercial break right after a message from our sponsors Guys I am not afraid or ashamed to tell you that like probably everybody else in the world my credit Occasionally takes a ding here or there a late payment cable equipment that never magically appeared back at the cable company, or a random creditor that I've never heard of trying to squeeze me for money. While I had some time last week, I opened up credit karma and I looked through my annual credit report to make sure I was addressing any issues with my credit. It's something that I do about once a quarter and I do it through the credit karma app. I have had this app forever for many years

and it has changed the way that I deal with my credit. If you're like me and you've had the occasional thing on your credit, applying for credit card can be a really nerve-wracking experience. You have no idea whether or not they're gonna say yes or no. You take all that time out of your day, they do a hard poll on your credit, only to find out two weeks later by mail,

you didn't get the credit card. And those rejections can be embarrassing and they can hurt your credit. That's why Credit Karma created Karma Confidence Technology. It helps their members apply to credit cards with more confidence. Credit Karma uses your credit profile to show you the offers that are tailored to your financial situation. I have actually applied for and gotten three separate credit cards through credit karma over the years. Credit Karma has a bunch of credit card partners so you can be assured that you're exploring

all sorts of options and they can even help you with credit card rewards. Credit Karma can help you compare your reward options so you can find the best card that fits your lifestyle. Are you ready to find the card for you? Head to Credit Karma and check out your personalized mix of offers today. Go to creditcarma.com or download the credit karma app to find the card for you, head to Credit Karma and check out your personalized mix of offers today. Go to CreditCarma.com or download the Credit Karma app to find the card for you. That's credit karma.com. Credit Karma with a K dot com. Chrissy and I are big fans of Credit Karma and we appreciate them becoming a sponsor of the commercial break.

Okay, here we go. If you lost hundreds of thousands of dollars in the real estate market recently because you've been scammed by scammy scammers Don't worry. I have spent at least 13 seconds learning how to turn the tables You two can be a Nigerian real estate scammer online This actually was born out of to a dinner that we had gone to pre-pandemic. We were laughing about the scammy scammer. You're right. Yeah, that's right.

This is a voicemail that I left for a group of friends. I still got that voicemail. I still have it too. Yeah, I mean, obviously, I still have it. It's invented in the history of the commercial break. This is not something I put together for the episode. This is a voicemail or a voice note that I left all of these friends after a dinner one night

when we were talking about the real estate business and how scammy it really is. So here we go. Learning how to turn the tables. YouTube can be a Nigerian real estate tamer online for free. I'm gonna show you how to make multiple fake Facebook pages and you're gonna become the king of internet marketing. Buy my series now today, 1999 plus 1999 shipping and handling.

And right now, if you act quickly, I'm gonna throw in another package for 1999 plus 1999 shipping. No, that's actually pretty funny. It is. And handling, it's a deal you can't beat, so to a friend, so to a family, give it actually pretty funny. It is. And handling it's a deal you can't beat, and a two-of-friend, and a two-of-family. Give it to your dog. It doesn't matter.

Everyone's gonna be making money on this brand new, sure. Oh, that's bad news, sir. It's my drop. Oh, I remember. I recorded that on the shitter. That's right, you told me that. I was in the bathroom, but night after dinner,

and I was, as I was like, who are you talking to? No, no. And I was like, it's talking to my friend. And the real estate business. Okay, now here gets really good. Ready? Okay. Here's the 17-minute introduction to the first episode

of the commercial break. One that makes no sense whatsoever. [♪ OUTRO MUSIC PLAYING [♪ At least you started off with the great music. I did, right off the beginning. Coming up on this episode of the commercial break. Coming up, we cannot afford a real answer. [♪ OUTRO MUSIC PLAYING [♪

Coming up on this $3 episode of the commercial break. I couldn't wait for the $25 an ounce for it to make our promos. We're gonna get you a microphone eventually. It sounds perfectly fine. You sound perfectly fine. You sound perfectly fine. Perfectly fine What is that I don't know that's coming in on the frequency. It sounds wonderful on this end. This is podcast gold. I haven't even ever heard a podcast. That sounds great. You sound great on this one.

Which end was that? The acid. That's the acid. Yeah, funny. So, let's get this. However, looking at him now. What the hell are you seeing? I've been a tunnel.

I know, you sound like you're in a tunnel. It's sex or something. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I feel like it. Yeah. I feel like it. I feel like it.

I feel like it. I feel like it. I feel like it. I feel like it. I feel like it. I feel like it. I feel like it. I feel like it.

I feel like it. I feel like it. I feel like it. I feel like it. I feel like it. I feel like it. I feel like it. I feel going through my head right now. Why I ever thought this part of our conversation would be funny, this is the 36 minute lead up into us actually recording.

Oh, okay. Do you remember what trouble we were having? Yeah. You're like, I can't, the permissions. The microphone, the first thing. The microphone, the thing. Yeah, yeah. I recorded all of that and then decided

that it was a good idea to intro the cut. The, our whole podcast is predicated. A technical issues and shitty sub quality from the very beginning. A theme that would follow us for the next two hundred and five episodes. Yeah. Allow us versions. I have to go back to the conditions. Yeah. No one told me you're having one conversation I'm having another. I'm just- I think I might have called Jeff in, like, Jeff, I'm helping. You did?

Oh! I let Astrid and Alice and listen to this before I put it out. They're like, that's great. It's super funny. What's funny about this? I'm talking over Chrissy. I'm singing and Chrissy's doing something. It would be difficult.

Can I hold it? Can I hold it? Can I hold it? I can't hold it. dude something difficult random the intro that goes on forever You can't wear me when we get started. It's it's not any other If I wrote a book would you do the forward? Morning the commercial break contains racy language and off-color joking if you're easily offended You may want to press pause and if you have small children in the room you're an awful parent now enjoy the That's the way to get him Brian offending right on the beginning

Racy language off end the only three people that are gonna listen to your show Oh my talking to Okay, I can see you can you hear me? I can hear you through your you hear me? Through your blue teeth? What? I can hear you through my AirPods. Jeff, you can't hear Brian. So good. Wow, look at that. We started to podge.

We started on Podge. The very beginning of the commercial break. Recorded on April 11th, 2020 for Podstarity. If you're keeping score at home, that's what you write down. Yeah. Okay, so we send out the first episode and there's zero threads of life on the back end of this. I'll tell you what, three weeks earlier, I had put out a two weeks earlier,

I had put out a podcast about the then emerging federal relief program they were giving to small businesses, the SBA. I had made a SBA, just letting people know how they can get a hold of these loans, these SBA loans, and I sent it out to a group of people on a mass text message, we're all sharing information on how we're going to survive this, right? You got to remember at the time, it's a group of shareholders. For small business owners, we don't have any clue, like the real estate industry going to

go into the tank. It didn't, it did the exact opposite, and I left them. Shouldn't have made money then. No. $60,000 in the home is stupid podcast. tank it didn't it did the exact opposite and I left it should have made money then now $60,000 in the home is stupid podcast The sponsors pouring in from nowhere Sponsors canceling left and right All thing we're doing great over

So I had put out this SBA episode and I had 110 downloads on that in like the first 24 hours. Yes. I thought that I had created magic like, holy shit, maybe this whole pod, maybe if I do this other podcast, this comedy one, this is gonna take off. I had 110 people listen to this and you know, I don't even know what happened. We sent this episode out and I went back and I looked at our stats. And on the very three days after we released that episode, we got 22 downloads, 20 of which I am positive were me going to each podcast application and downloading.

Yeah, I thought it was Jeff and I. Jeff and I, I think Rachel, you know, Alison. Yes. But we're in the 20s. However, and I just had, you know, Alison, but we're in the 20s. However, and I just had to point this out too, because when we started this, there weren't near like podcasting is just exploded in recent years. There's so many now, but at the time, I think I had maybe like three that I was following on my podcast. I swear now I have like 52, but I mean, they were major ones.

It was like NPR and New York times and different, you know, I mean, major ones. That's who you, that's what everyone is doing. Yeah. We put it out. We put it out there. We thought we were just going to go right into that stream of wealth. Exactly. Rogan's going to sign a Spotify contract.

We got to get on this trend right now. He's sending me those articles. I know. I was like see we can make some money doing this. I have a seven year plan. Seven years to make dollar one. If we spend a hundred thousand dollars a year for the first seven years we're gonna make ten10. It's just kind of what happened. That's not only what happened. Okay, so, I imagine that, just first three days, 20 up, but we didn't know any difference, so we were excited about any signs of life. Yes.

I mean, I don't think we were super excited, but I think we're like, somebody's listening, right? And then... We were doing it more for ourselves, too, honestly. I think we've always been doing it for ourselves. We always have been. I mean, now we have responsibilities and sponsors and stuff like that. But we're still just doing it for ourselves.

Yeah, make each other laugh. We love our sponsors, but it's not like, you know, my mom had just, my mom had just passed away. It was also a big deal. That's true. I, suddenly and early and yeah, and so that was making me laugh. We're in this crazy time. We don't know what we're doing.

Yeah, Astrid was super pregnant. Yeah. Astrid was pregnant. We were just like, let's just keep it going. I think it was, yeah, and I've said this on another episode. And we hold up and close. I know we hold up and closets and recorded late nights and on vacations. And we didn't know anything about what we were doing, but we were having fun.

And still are. That's true. The day that it's not fun, I'm given it. I'm just gonna be like, I don't wanna do this just because, I still do. I still do. I still do. We're making money.

Don't worry AT&T, I got you covered. Mid-Mobile, don't drop that cancellation. But when interesting thing happened, I went back and looked after episode number two, right? And then we double the audience, we get to 50, but then we start seeing people from around the world are downloading, or at least their IP addresses are from around the world.

And Canada is an early indication of the sign of life because they're the first country where we see other people outside of the Atlanta, Georgia area, and people we know, like in Miami, or Dallas, or Chicago, people where we know those human beings, those downloads are probably coming from human beings we already know. We know, we personally know, yeah.

But in Canada, we started Canada and Amsterdam and in the Netherlands. We started getting people listening and we had no clue how they found it. But listen, that's just podcasts or just weird stuff. And then they fell off and then they fell off. And then they fell off and then they fell off. Because they probably took a listen

at first two minutes and it was like, what the fuck is this? This is so awful. They should probably edit out the part where they're trying to figure out the wrong thing. They were a captive body. Morning! The commercial break is a horrible podcast! You've downloaded the wrong thing! It's gonna infect your computer.

Warning, you've just been hacked. Not purposefully, unaccident. The commercial break contained malware from the beginning. So Canada is an early adopter, it's my point. And, you know, who knows if they're actually people? That's the thing about podcasting, too, is you don't know the word the downloads are coming from. All these lessons we would learn coming up, but at the time,

we got all excited, we thought everything was in. Astrid, who is Venezuelan? Yes. Her mother, who lives down in Venezuela. Who is like a very prominent business person down there and has a huge network of other prominent business. I told everybody, I told everybody, sent the link around and all of a sudden

we go from 50 to like 200 downloads in a couple days and I was like holy shit. Now what happened in Astro goes, my mom sent it to all her friends and people were like, I got sticker her back, like what the fuck is this? It's she's like it's my son Get your daughter out of the States

He's married to a madman Okay, yeah, so episode number 10. We've dropped off in Fesiline. Yeah, we don't have any Fesiline lists there. So you're not even Gustavo who works for the fucking podcast list. We still love you Gustavo. Okay, episode number 10, or nine or 10.

I went, I actually went back and looked all of this I make the decision independently of Chrissy my wife or anybody else financially involved in the podcast that I'm gonna start spending money I Advertise that's right. So I do I On the sunset No one's driving because no one's leaving their house So sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad You tell me you're like I can't get it can't paint all like a billboard billboard What in the line it literally had a picture of Chrissy and I the commercial break logo

It said click here Because I couldn't get another banner had made quickly I put click here to listen. Oh my God, my marketing genius was already at work. Oh yeah. But my idea was, if I put, I we have no listeners in California at all, if I put it in Los Angeles, and then I did like-

No wonder. Yeah, I spent all our money on that one blip, they call it a blip, on that one blip that lasted, you know, 30 seconds for one, you know, 30 seconds every 10 minutes for one hour, that I had to spread the rest of the budget out across the country and places like Topika cans. But the truth is, we did get a few people

that listened off of that. I don't think they stick those things around. I was just saying they're falling off. That's right. So then I decided I'm gonna take my internet marketing experience and I'm gonna go do some pay per click. So what I'm gonna do, because people are gonna be looking for the commercial break

and they're not gonna be able to find us unless I put some ads out there. Well, that's another useless venture, and I talked about it on episode number 16. No, okay. We're gonna know. But the other thing that came up was, what are the search terms

that people are getting to our website from? I'm gonna give you an example of the clearly relevant key terms that Google has now has now charged me to send people to my website for search terms for the commercial break podcast best sex podcast. I remember I was doing this episode. I remember this too. I remember every episode. Still from home. We were both doing it from home. Yeah, you know what's funny? Is there so many moments of my life where now that my brain

is just stuffed with information that I can't remember clearly? Yes. Or that I don't remember clearly unless I think about it real hard. Right? Or somebody kind of pokes or prods me a picture or whatever. I go through these episodes to put stuff like this together. And I remember every fucking moment. Was this the same episode where you talked about

your piano playing at the Switzerland? No, no, no, no, no. No, but this is best podcast to sleep to. Okay, right. And then remember 16. So listen, here's the bomb that dropped. So. Oh,

paid about $10 for those clicks. Okay. Best podcast to fall asleep to. Now I can't argue with this one too much. I knew it. I was spending money. Google was picking the key terms for me based on my website. It was a smart campaign. It was a smart campaign is what it was.

And man, it was an awful smart, because it was putting us up there with best podcast to fall asleep to. Can you imagine falling asleep for the commercial break? We are so loud enough not to. And by the way, the first, here's another interesting thing about the evolution of the podcast is we're doing kind of a metal recap of retrospective.

A retrospective. An autobiography. What is so different today than was back in the first 40 episodes, 50 episodes, let's call it, is the way that the podcast is structured, the way that we have found some structure to our show. But certainly the intro of the show is the thing that's most noticeably different to me anyway. Yes.

Is when we first started the podcast, we'd be like, hey, hey, Chris, what's up? Yeah, thanks guys, thanks for joining us. Now we're like, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,

blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah Oh I'm rocking right ready You made it to the Wednesday afternoon Hop day up day once a day on pump day. What's the thing? Hop, hop day. What's the thing? Oh my god. Let's go to line number three.

What do you want to do this weekend? We're out of the lake. Go to the lake. Oh my god. Find number three. Find number three. Yeah. Find number three.

You want tickets to Molly Group's 35th reunion tour. Fitzdale's gonna throw up on the front row. Who has to see Fitzdale's becker because he's coming out with his fly undone. Woo! Wow! Woo-hoo! Dr. Peer-der! What did he say, Dr. Peer-der? I'm out of breath. Oh my god.

What now? Kick-stop! I'm out of breath. Oh. Oh my God. Oh my God. What? What? I'm out. Okay. All right.

Oh. This is why the show has a compiler because it's 27 minutes of Chrissy and I laughing, which is another noticeable difference. I think you and I were so giggly in the first couple of episodes when something funny would happen, we would be giggly, but we were reserved about it. Like you could tell that we almost like stepped on our own laughing, right?

It was like, okay, we should go left. That was nervous. Yeah. And then I was nervous. Now I just, okay. Yeah, now it's just drinking out. I figure it's working. Chrissy's drunk, I got my tea.

You don't really give a shit about you. That's not true. We love you. Yes. Okay. All right. Episode number. Let's move forward another 10 episodes or another in the the twerms going forward in the in the timeline. We meet one of the first, uh, I guess

characters on the show, but one of the, one of the people that works with the show that we had some fun. Now we start to, now we, now we're starting to get a sense of personality around the commercial break. Like drunk guy at the bar. They're always kicking out That drunk guy at the bar that keeps hitting on the hostess throwing up on the floor Asking for cocaine The episode Gustavo episode number 312 Love that name to Yeah, it sounds like a Spanish sex machine, doesn't he? Gustavo. It's a great name.

Yeah, it sounds like a Spanish sex machine, doesn't it? Gustavo. Who's that boy in the underwear? Gustavo. Gustavo. Who's that boy who you do get? Gustavo. I remember doing this show too.

I was like at my computer, my parent's house hidden away like a pinnacle. Because you know, I'm doing barris to tell everybody you're part of the commercial break. V-real with me. Have you ever been in barris to tell somebody that you're part of the commercial break? No, not at all. You know? No, I'm not.

I've never been in barris. I've never created it. I've not embarrassed at all, but I've also been like, I have to do the caveat of it's not for everyone. Yeah. As soon as you say that too, people are like, oh, that's, yeah, no, I get it. It's a comedy podcast.

It's a comedy podcast. That sounds amazing. Well, it's not for everyone. Not for everyone. That's our new tagline. That commercial break, it's not for everyone. Like, my mother-in-law for instance. Not for everyone.

No. My mother-in-law doesn't understand what we're saying, thank God. Chrissy, we just came up with a season three and four word tagline. It used to be the commercial break and absurd comedy podcast. It's not the commercial break. It's not for everyone Because I say that every time I meet you. Yeah, every time every time. I'm like, well, stop it. Like children or other people easily offended by anything

If you don't like laughing or streaming or loud noises, you have children. If you were born after 1990, for male or female, they have a penis or a vagina or whatever in between. It's probably not for you. It's just for aliens. We know all the aliens. So go to at the commercial break on Insta and join and then you go to TCB. There's a point to why I played this clip to just keep listening podcast.com, which is

where you can become a member of the break room. Let me explain a little change room. I remember sitting there like going through racking my brain, you were like, Chris and me, we've got to come up with topic for the break. Yes. New flip. I was like, okay. But listen to the rest of this clip.

Listen to the rest of this clip. And then because like you're so on point here, listen to the rest of this clip. You're gonna be kidding. Do people die or reality? Yeah. Wasn't that. Yes.

Okay. I get it. Thening if you don't mind, Chris, he, here's what's gonna Yes. I agree. Thening, if you don't mind, Chrissy, here's what's going to happen. I've decided it's entirely too much responsibility on my shoulders, for me to actually put out a newsletter every month. And given the response of the newsletter, we only have three people at the commercial break, two of them did not open the newsletter. This starts along in historical trend of Chrissy and I doing things for exactly one episode. A couple, maybe a couple. Maybe a couple, maybe two.

We tried a couple times and we're like, yeah, that didn't work. So early on, we have a couple hundred listeners probably at this point. You know, we're probably to a thousand total downloads. I'm just taking a guess a couple hundred listeners probably at this point. You know, we're probably a thousand total downloads. I'm just taking a guess, cause I actually didn't look this up. We're I'm guessing at episode number 26, we're at a thousand, or maybe a 2000 total downloads. So now, Chrissy and I ever, yeah.

Well, I mean, in all 25 episodes, so that's like, you know, a hundred, which is great by the way. At that time, it was great. We were so excited about it. And listen, numbers are a vanity metric. It really doesn't mean anything except for all the money you can make off of it.

That seems to be alluding up. I like we can't turn to our numbers. It's anything. I'm number one in Canada. No one gives a shit. I send it around and people are like, is that real? That's not right.

How does that happen? Chef was like, what? He grabbed my phone last time. I'm excited to see me because there's no way. You're beating out in BC. I know. I know. Everyone doubts me. I sent it to a few people last night because I was so excited. And they're like, how did that happen?

How did that happen? What? Because we're the best podcast in Canada right now. And they're like must be someone who replied must be a small audience. Canada. Fuck you man. But Chrissy and I, we're trying to rack our brains on how with the little resources that we have, we can get to- He's blown it on billboards.

Yeah, it's blown it I think the worst microphone. The worst microphones and wires for the studio that don't work. I have a box of wires that have never been used. Like just keep buying. I'm like, oh, we need this wire. I thought the wire we needed. So true. It's true.

It's true. It's happened so many times. You're like, this is the one I'm going to best. I'm going to best. When we went to Menfo, I brought an entire huge suitcase words of equipment. I used a recorder, the size of my fist, for the entire thing. We had a whole booth and had nothing in it but my recorder,

the size of my fist, and a t-shirt. So Chrissy and I come up, we're trying to rank our rating, come up with these ideas to get people engaged in the show because to that point, we really hadn't heard from anybody except for people we know about the show. We're like, yeah, listen to your podcast. Yeah. And that's it.

It's not for everybody. Listen to your show. You're right, it's not for everybody, but you know. Free things, you know. I'm sure there's somebody out there who listens to it. I had a guy who... I'll hear your dream. Yeah, I had a guy one time.

I love him. I love him. I'm not gonna say his name, but I love him. And he'll know who I am. He'll know. He doesn't listen anymore, so it doesn't really fucking matter. We went golfing episode number 10, 15, 20, whatever it is.

Yeah. So I got to listen to the podcast, man, really good, really solid stuff. It's really funny. Listen to every episode. And I'm like, oh, thanks. I went to the World Series baseball game with him last year. And he had, we had the most awkward conversation

about my podcast. He was like, so how's that podcast going? And I'm like, oh, yes, it's going I was like, yeah, you know, I leave you to listen, but then, you know, so much stuff to do He's like last episode I list it was probably 26. What are you guys on now? I'm like, 12 It's such an awkward night. I didn't know how to handle it. I was like, I don't care if you don't listen.

No, I'm my sister's mother-in-law. This was last Thanksgiving. They are at the house at Kelly's. Hey, she can say, yeah, she can listen to your podcast. Yeah. And then that was all she said. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I go it's not for everyone. Happy Thanksgiving. Where's the turkey? We're wide. We're not a turkey. That's right. All right. So then, so that's episode number 26. We start a long string of things that we will not finish. The break room being the first of them, which is a club. Started off as news as a newsletter. The newsletter, then we tried to do a Patreon.

And then we went to call about- Did you recently just discover that we had way more newsletter signups than you thought we had? Listen, we got like 78 newsletter signups when we started announcing that program. And I was so fucking excited, but some of the names were like, go fuck yourself. And you know, tiny penis and,

no, but whole magic or something. It's like, so let's say we had 50 realness and we just kinda let it go, right? We said okay, no more break room. I recently- There was time intensive. No time intensive, because we didn't spend any time on it. We did one and just let it go.

We had time intensive. Making this show is type of intensive. Doing the break room was, we conquered. We were trying to come up with ideas. Yeah, a copy and paste that a story about Gassy Candy. Yeah, exactly. Candy given Diary of everybody. Okay, so, oh is the Sugar-Free gummy bear.

Yeah. Okay, so, but I just dropped it, but then a couple of days ago, I go back and I look at our inbox for that particular program, and there are hundreds of emails that I had never seen. It all happened after we let the break where it go. Hundreds of emails of people,

I never responded to it. I'm sorry, guys. No opportunities. No, we're flying away. For websites into it now, and I don't even know how to get all those people, I mean, I guess I can send them an email, but that's too time intensive, guys.

Just listen to the show. Text me, I'll text you back. Texting I can do. Texting I can do. And I think it's this time we also start our Instagram page, which still has the exact same amount of people. I have it updated. I'm like eight, 10 months.

I think it's the years. I think the commercial my liking 10 months. I think just layers. I think the commercial break is the same. I think my son posted a picture of himself with a frozen filter on, that's the last thing we did on InstaGur. Because no one gives a shit. They don't care. They don't care.

All right, so now that's episode number 20, Gustavo the break room, you get it. We now we move into episode number 30. Are we gonna have a guest on soon? Yes, there is, well, it's not a guest, but it's somebody that we work with. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. That comes in the history of commercial break part two.

Oh, okay. We're gonna do two of these episodes, not back to back. We're gonna do two of these episodes. So just hang tight. This is the early years, but I know who you're talking about. Dr. Henry Fonda. Yes, Dr. Henry Fonda has his own special place in our heart, but here we go. This is actually where I think we kind of might come into our own.

I don't think it's just Henry Fonda. He's never a doctor. He was. You always like to put Dr. in I think it's just Henry Fonda. He was never a doctor. He was. You always like to put doctor in front of people's neck. Doctor Henry Fonda. Dr. Scott. Dr. Scott.

But we have to tell people about this now. I can't just say Dr. Scott. Okay. Years ago. Sidebar. Years ago. I don't even think I hadn't met Jeff yet. I mean, this is different.

10 years ago. Yeah. We're at this party I hadn't met Jeff yet. I mean, this is every 10 years ago. Yeah. Um, no, this is a marriage before that. We're at this party and Brian invites me to come up. We're best friends. We're doing everything together. You know, all the time. Say, yeah, we go up there to this party and we're hanging out and Jeff. Brian, I'm sorry. Brian goes, so, you know, this is Scott dock. Dock. a doctor. If everybody calls him Dock's, Scott. And I said, okay, great. He's an older gentleman, super nice, like, gray hair, you know, somebody's dad actually

that was there at the party. So we're sitting there and, you know, I'm alone talking to him later. And he's like, what's up, Dock's, Scott? And he goes, hey, what's up, right? And he goes, what are you calling me a doc? I'm not a doctor. I didn't know. I had no idea. He's professional is framing. I know.

He's doctor framing. And by the way, this is like the time I had this conversation. You've known him for years. Years and years. I've been on weekend retreat with this guy. I've been at yoga classes that last time. I was like, I'm going to be a doctor. I'm going to be a doctor. I'm going to be a doctor. I'm going to be a doctor. I'm going to be a doctor. I might have this conversation. You've known him for years. Years and years.

I've been on weekend retreat with this guy. I've been at GeoGood classes that lasted five days with this guy. Many interviews to visit Dr. And Doc's got what's going on. I don't understand why you called me Doc. I don't know. I thought you were a doctor. Well, for dienterist?

Diaphractor? No? LeBonamist? What are you? Oh, I thought you were a doctor. Well, if I enter as a guy factor, no. Lobotomous, what are you? Oh my God. Okay, Henry Fodder will make it a few. Here we are, episode number 32. Oh God, here we go. We got video to this. This is our third time.

Now we are in the studio together. I think this is when we worked the side. Yes. Okay, the way you switch. This is, this is episode. How far in my mushroom shirt? Yeah, I know. This is the third episode we are doing in front of a camera in a studio together.

So after episode number 28, Chrissy and I come together in my house in a studio that was really kind of put together hastily, but nothing looking bad. No, nothing bad at all. My father-in-law did that. I said he did a good job. Okay, so here, but the lighting is awful. I don't, I have an orange light behind me.

Why am I lit up by an orange light? I look like Trump on steroids. But I look like Trump eating carrots. That's what I look like. Okay, here we go. This is one of the episodes that people often, Oh my gosh, laugh at the hard. When they text, when they text when they when they text

this once every six months this is one of the episodes they ask about yeah they ask about they want they they like it okay all right here we go so we get there I'm with their 15 minutes early and of course my main concern is that there is a raging fucking pandemic going on right here in the United States. Yeah, it's it's up like 80 something percent. Two hundred thousand new cases. Wow. On this day that we are recording, which is Sunday before the Tuesday. When this will be brought.

Yeah, we had stand up. I look at the. So real. Ram, she's the gang gang of can't shoot straight is what it is. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. And so I'm really concerned about this because now I'm gonna put my son and my daughter

in the lab of a strange man who's been touching thousands of other children over the course of the week. Yeah, how are they making that safe? Look, I look at pro-sense. I'm like, how are they making it? It's funny, this is funny. You can go to youtube.com, I'll post a commercial them. I like how are they made? It's funny. This is funny. You can go to youtube.com,

check the version of Rayk if you want to follow along. Have my faces moving at all. No, it's not my head. Because it keeps everyone in the house, everyone in the staff, the staff. I say staff, my wife and a couple of other people keep telling us to look at the fucking camera, but we know. That's what we're like gliding into looking at the camera.

We shoved it down. Come on, David. COVID Christmas. Our Santa Claus. Our Santa Claus wearer is plastic and nothing else. No cleaning, no sanitizing. Your kids will get COVID. Don't worry.

Herd immunity right around the corner. COVID Christmas. It's the COVID Christmas castle. Come on down. I'm sorry. Govin Christmas. It's the COVID Christmas castle. Come on down. We have 12 sandas, 11 of that. Your kids hate Santa. Wait a minute.

We permit him to not wear a mask. No, he's saying Santa Taddard. We require that he be wrapped in plastic. Nothing else. Yeah, was he wearing a mask? No. We require that he be wrapped in plastic nothing else No It's like a dance like it could have been disguised underneath like a beard good Have yeah, that would have been a little weird Santa's got no mouth

Because the kids aren't scared mouth because the kids aren't scared enough. This goes on. I'll let him play. I just for a minute. Yeah. San has got no pupils. Santa boxes, young man. Cully flower eyes. No pupils. His mouth is missing Right up step right up. He's got a broom for an arm Look lost to me bag Remember that hair Michael Jackson had?

Same hair. This hair melted in the Pepsi commercial. You are the role here. Oh my god. This was going to be a castle. It's like Arabian. Christmas got the castle. Oh my god.

It's totally in great only. Woo! That was right at Christmas and we decided to get together. Christmas got it gas oh my god That was right at Christmas and we decided to get together We have friends that have sickle so I'm sorry that wasn't Sickle so sad I always felt bad about saying that. It's a- And now it's on record for forever. I know, it's a iteration, but you get it. So I showcase this part, not to showcase how funny it was, because I really do think

that was pretty fucking funny. Yeah, something struck me and I'll just back home. It's about, yeah. Yeah, one of the things that I wanted to say and why I'm showing this is because- Is it great awareness for success? Yeah, it's great awareness and I'm showing this is because is it create awareness for success? Yes. It awareness that I'm sorry about calling Santa's sickle so Santa.

It's a horrible disease. However, I'm not, I'm not sorry about the, or come. And then stick for it all. The broomstick for it all. Cast ironies, no mouth. Come on down, go make Christmas castle. We'll take care of you.

Yeah. I remember I was right around Christmas and you were like, yeah, you're like, we booked a Santa picture taking. I know, but we watched. Yeah. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What? I mean, this was 2020.

This is 2020. Yeah. No vaccine. No thought of vaccines. Nothing. Yeah, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, But I was willing to put a month COVID Christmas castle Santa's lap. The guy had no mask. No, I had Santa's. I said, oh my God, it was crazy. But here's the reason why I point this particular one out. You should understand. You should know that you did and probably reflect in the content that Christian, I don't do any of this scripted. Nothing we do is rehearse.

Nothing. Not even COVID Christmas, castles. So there you go. It just flows naturally. This has been, like honestly, it's been such a wild ride to go back and to look at this and to think of. That is really funny.

How far we've come, it's not very far. I get go blinches. Yeah, it's a little bit better than we were on episode one. At least we have the right microphones. Yeah. Oh, there is so much more.

Oh my God, we're only into episode number 30. We've got 200, but I'm not going to do all 200. I'm going to go to 100 and then we're going to be done. So we'll do a part two, maybe a part three of the history of the commercial break, but we're gonna do it, we're gonna sprinkle it in. I don't wanna get you OD on a meta, like, you know, commercial break about the commercial break.

Yeah. For three episodes in a row, it's probably not interesting to people who just joined listening to the commercial, it's probably not interesting to the people who are listening to you. This is a vanity project for Chrissy and I. Chrissy and I wanted to find a way to whack people who are listening to you. This is a Jovannity project for Chrissy and I.

Chrissy and I wanted to find a way to whack each other off and hear it. Hey Chrissy, let's laugh at our funniest stuff again. Let's laugh at ourselves laughing at ourselves. That's right, just to quiet out. Boom. But there you get it, there's the beginning, that's the start, that's the birding process. It's the origin story. Came right out of our pudendas and came kicking and screaming.

Well, not necessarily kicking and screaming. We actually tried to hide it. Flipped into the mouth. Yeah, figure out how to turn the microphone on. First. Oh, Jeff. Jeff. Jeff.

Jeff. Do you have the permission set correctly? Hello. Are you getting WSB 750 in your earphones? Oh, my god. But Chris said I wanted to also say we're grateful to all those who have been supportive all long the way. None.

The least of which, and I mean honestly, is our wonderful spouses, Astrid and Jepp, who put up with this bullshit so many hours of the week that it's just unbelievable. It takes a lot of time and energy enough for to create these episodes and so thank them. Thank you Gustavo big will the champ Marianne Wells will Tina. Oh, yeah Tina Kano even Dean remember Dean. Yeah, Dean Dean Dean Bodie Dean Bodie that We tried to do cross- cross revotions with people.

That didn't work. Nobody wanted us. Now look at us. Remember what a fucking kid. Yeah, no we're in Canada. Fuck you, you're not getting on our show. Less you pay. And it's on sale.

50% off. Go advertise cast.com. You're not getting in unless you pay a really low amount of money. And then, and maybe then. Yeah, so if you want to get in on the ground floor, thousand times, we're right there. Okay, that's all I can do today. So what I will say is I love you, Chris.

I love you, Brian. Best of you, Chris. Best of you, Chris. Best of you, yeah. And best of you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, we do say, we must say, and we always say. Bye! Bye! I'm gonna be a little more I'm gonna be a little more I'm gonna be a little more I'm gonna be a little more

I'm gonna be a little more I'm gonna be a little more I'm gonna be a little more I'm gonna be a little more I'm gonna be a little more I'm gonna be a little more I'm gonna be a little more I'm gonna be a little more You you