The Commercial Break - TCP: We're Just Like You!

Episode Date: December 6, 2024

Episode #650: A new studio means exactly what you’d expect: chaos!  We got a new studio!! Sneaker reselling Temu A back up ham leg! Hunter Biden Peeing in a bottle If there’s no #2, there���s nothing to do! Bryan peed *in* a couch? Take a bite out of a swordfish Surviving in the ocean Carnival cruises The Brady Feigls Some studio oopsies Would you want to meet your doppelgänger? Bryan’s billion dollar idea The Jasons Showing it all Ryan Murphy Pantsless, now on Spotify video Text us or leave us a voicemail: [phone]TCB Follow Us: IG: @thecommercialbreak TikTok: @tcbpodcast YT: youtube.com/thecommercialbreak www.tcbpodcast.com Executive Producer: Bryan Green Hosts: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Producer: Astrid B. Green Producer & Audio Editor: Christina Archer Christina’s Podcast: Apple Podcasts & Spotify To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hey Chrissy, best to you. Best to you, Brian. Best to you out there in the podcast universe. It's the holiday season and a lot of times, podcasts like ourselves will take off, but not us, Chrissy, we have bills to pay and miles to feed. So we are going to be producing brand new episodes of The Commercial Break this entire holiday season.

And I thought it was important to let our audience know. Jingle, jingle all the way home. Jingle, jingle your dingle dangles. Stick with The Commercial Break and stay tuned for the 12 Days of TCB, our first ever 12 Days first ever 12 days of that's right December 13th through Christmas Day brand new episodes every day what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard at no point in your rambling incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational I always make it sound much more lame than it actually is I'm like hands with me and my friend and we're talking

Like you and your friend when you talk about you know the inside of an asshole When you talk about the poop cruise That's right when you and your buddy get together and talk about all your sexual exploits live on air. The next episode of The Commercial Break starts now. Yeah, boy! Oh yeah, cats and kittens, welcome back to The Commercial Break. I'm Brian Green. This is my dear friend and the co-host of the show, Kristin Joy Hoadley.

Best to you, Kristin. Best to you, Brian. Best to you out there in the podcast universehost of the show, Kristin Joy Hoadley. Best to you, Kristin. Best to you, Brian. Best to you out there in the podcast universe. How the hell are you? Thanks for joining us on this Friday edition of the commercial break from our brand new studio. That's right.

Here somewhere north of Atlanta, Georgia, you figure it out. And I've given you all the clues. All you have to do is piece the puzzle together or Google my name on one of those shitty websites. You can now request Google take off your personal information from the search engines. Did you know that? Like all identifying information. Phone numbers, addresses, social security numbers, if those are available. You can now request that Google take all of that information

down like automatically. All you have to do is submit a request to Google, which I did the other day, because I'm now notably famous and I don't want the throngs of fans finding out where I live. No, Astrid would not be cool with that. First fan that shows up at the door, this show is over. So it's a threat and a promise, because Astrid will not have it.

Uh, so welcome to the new studio, Chrissy. It looks really good. I know, it looks really good. Everybody did a great job. Well, thank you. I'll take credit for all of it. Uh, even though it wasn't all me. It was mainly Astrid. But I'll take credit for it. We have a brand new neon sign.

We have a brand new neon sign. We've got a table. We look more relaxed. You can now see my socks. You've got a table. Table chairs. We look more relaxed. You can now see my socks. I know. You can see your shoes. My shoes.

What are you wearing today? What do you got on there? I've got on my Air Jordans. Look at you. How much are those? What are those run new? What do those cost you? They weren't that bad.

Nike was having a sale. I think they were like, I don't know, $100, $120. $120. Something like that. Look at that. Creasy making, 120 bucks. $120, look at that. Crazy making the big bucks. People say crazy. Which podcast is paying you? I am moonlighting on another one.

No, those, you know, sneaker sales are crazy. I know, there's that website where they resell the sneakers. What is that? Oozle, Boozle, Snoozle, something like that? I don't know, I'm not making that kind of money yet on my other podcast. If you're making money on another podcast, I want in on that podcast.

Which podcast is that and do they need a host? Yeah, there's a whole trend where guys, girls, they go out, they buy these shoes. The limited edition stuff. The limited edition and then they resell them on a website, which now I'm seeing commercials for. You know that Astrid and I went, I think it was in, I wanna say it was in Los Angeles,

and we were down on Rodeo Drive, and we went to a store, a very fancy, Rodeo Drive is really very fancy. Huge. Huge mistake, and then we went to like the cheesecake factor. So honestly we went to some like. Did you see Kanye? No, I think we went to Brio.

You know that place Brio? Brio, yes. I like Brio. Did not see Kanye or Bianca and her nipples. Did not see that. Damn. Or her vagina. So we went to like a Brio,

like a nice porch on Rodeo Drive, and it was beautiful. I love Brio actually. Yeah a Brio, like a nice porch on Rodeo Drive and it was beautiful. And the food was lovely. I love Brio actually. Yeah, Brio was very good and I found it to be pleasant on my wallet. So everything else on Rodeo Drive was crazy. Some places, there was like a place

that said on the front door, reservations absolutely required, don't even ask. And I was like, that is like a really fucking shitty thing to say. Wow, I know. So- Don't even think about it. So don't even think about it. We went to a store and Astrid's like, I gotta go to this store. It's all the rage. Everyone's talking about it on Instagram.

So we go into this store and it's all weathered clothing, used shoes, and like everything has a hole in it, as dirt, as mud, and nothing. And I mean nothing is less less than $1,000. Wow. Nothing. And Asher's like, it's all the rage to buy jeans from here, to buy these shoes, and I was like, these motherfuckers, these motherfuckers,

buy a pair of tennis shoes from Fibu or Emu, or whatever that Japanese, Chinese website is. What is that Japanese website everyone's into? Temu. Is it Temu? Christina here in the studio with us. Yes, she's able to help with our fact check. Hi.

Give you a little thumbs up. Yeah, thank you. Teemu, am I right about it? Teemu? Yeah, that's a fat website. I think we got our first Teemu package the other day. I saw it and said from Teemu. Anyway, so these motherfuckers are buying,

knockoff designer clothing on Teemu. They're running out in the street in puddles and then they're bringing them back indoors, So these motherfuckers are buying knockoff designer clothing on Tmoo. They're running out in the street in puddles and then they're bringing them back indoors, scuffing them up a little, and you're paying a thousand dollar markup to get used shoes and clothing with holes in it. I'm going to get asked to tell me what the name of this store was because I want to shout them out as a place to never go. It's fucking ridiculous.

So anyway, I like your shoes. That's good for you with the Air Jordans. Again, I like your shoes, that's good. Good for you with the Air Jordans. Again, I don't know how you're affording those. Jeff must be bringing in revenue. How was Jeff? How was the Thanksgiving holiday now that we're back? The Thanksgiving holiday was great.

Yeah. Yeah, I think we've already recorded our post Thanksgiving show, but. We have, but now that we're actually back from Thanksgiving, now that we're not pretending to be back from Thanksgiving anymore. It was wonderful, super low key. And there were just five of us.

That's the way I wanted it. And less stress because we ordered everything. You guys are. You know, there were a few homemade pies. You're such hipsters down there. But that's okay. You're such homemade pie. First of all, there's five of us. That's just the way I like it is. That's what she said.

Second of all, they're homemade pies. That's what she said. That you are so hipster. You are just the new, you are new and fresh and living ITP, getting everything created and made for you. It's probably very delicious. I will say, I'm not, I'm not sick. Yeah, that's what I was going to say.

It's a win. I am not on the toilet right now. We're not taking time off. I have a lot of time. I have a lot of time. I have a lot of time. I have a lot of time. I have a lot of time.

I have a lot of time. I have a lot of time. I have a lot of time. I have a lot of time. I have say, I'm not sick. I'm not sick. I am not on the toilet right now. We're not taking time off. I haven't lost any weight. I've gained it. So I consider that a W all around. The food was delicious. Listen, there was no turkey. The turkey was not good. Somebody was going to do a turkey and I guess that, abort! Abort, abort, the turkey is terrible. So we had a ham leg. We had two ham legs actually.

One was like the sliced ham that you would get at a place, but they cooked it. And I would say that that one probably fell short of expectations. So then my dad had like a backup ham leg that had a bone in it. It was like, you know, he backed up the food with additional food. And thank God he did, because then he said, come over here and get this ham. And I did. I just ate a little bit of it, just enough to taste it and make sure that it was pleasant. Yeah, and it was good? Yeah, sure.

And it was, no, dad did a good job. Everybody did a good job cooking. I have no complaints about the food this year. Mac and cheese, stuffing, potatoes, ograt, and rolls. The kind that you like to eat the homemade, yeasty, put a pound on every time you eat one kind of roll. I love it. Yeah, we did the Sister Schubert's, love those.

What are Sister Schubert's? You don't know Sister Schubert's. I've never met a Sister Schubert in my entire life. I'm gonna bring you ever a little pan of them. They're delicious. They're like what, dareholes? They're like a cult favorite too. People love them.

Are they really? Yeah, they come in a round little pan and they're smaller, like that big. Oh, and they're all packed together? Oh, and then you cook them and they bloom? They don't bloom too much, but yeah, you do cook them and then you eat them and they're delicious.

My aunt, my dad's sister, Babs, Barbara, we call her Babs. Babs from Chicago. She used to run the, there's a famous grocery store chain up there named Jewel. And so Jewel Osco, I think is what it's called now, Jewel Osco. And she used to run the bakery in Chicago for Jewel. And Jewel is like, I think is what it's called now, Jewel Osco. And she used to run the bakery in Chicago for Jewel. And Jewel is like based in Chicago. So it's the, or maybe the, and maybe now they're in Ohio. I'm not sure. I think they're owned by Kroger now, but Jewel had this huge bakery and the bakery would run like 24 hours a day creating all of the

breads and the muffins and the morning cakes and the coffee cakes and the rolls. And so, first of all, my aunt always smelled like bread, which was delicious to me. I loved it. I wanted to eat my aunt sometimes. I didn't say eat out my aunt. Everyone settled down. I said, eat my aunt. I wanted to eat her.

I wanted to take a bite of her. You know how that goes. Sometimes people smell so good. You want to eat them. Like babies, babies' little toes. You want to eat them. Yeah, I know. Or the cheeks.

Yeah. But don't do that in public little toes, you want to eat them. Yeah, I know. Um... Or the cheeks. Yeah, but don't do that in public. People think it's weird when you start biting your kids' toes in public. Give me those little nubs. So, we would go to work sometimes with Babs, Aunt Babs.

And Aunt Babs would, she had this big office, but in the office, you could see right out this glass window all of these dinner rolls that were just freshly baked coming down the little conveyor belt. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You could run over there and take one. This was the time when the, you know, food quality was different back then. If you, if no one was dying, or if you didn't get a rat

in your food, then, you know, it was acceptable. So you would just go and just grab a roll off the conveyor belt and I'm telling you what. I bet it was so good. We had them at every dinner. Every dinner, Babs would bring over those jewel rolls. So you would just go and just grab a roll off the conveyor belt and I'm telling you what. I bet it was so good. We had them at every dinner. Every dinner, Babs would bring over those jewel rolls, a coffee cake for dessert. It was delicious.

I loved it. And so it's hard for me to replicate that exact taste of those jewel rolls, but I'm going to try Sister Schubert's because it sounds like a thing that could be like the jewel rolls. Yeah, they're delectable. So, okay, well good. I'm glad you had a good Thanksgiving. Guess who else is having a good Thanksgiving? because it sounds like a thing that could be like the jewel rolls. Yeah, they're, they're delectable. So, okay, well good, I'm glad you had a good Thanksgiving. Guess who else is having a good Thanksgiving?

Is that? Hunter Biden is having a good Thanksgiving. I just thought I'd mention this as we're recording this. And it just happened, so it's coming on a Friday. As we're recording this, Hunter Biden has now been broadly, broadly pardoned by his father, Mr. President Joe Biden, for all criminal activity in a certain period of time, which is the power of the president. That's one of the king-like powers that survives constitutionally for our president. You can pardon him.

And of course, we all, some of us up in arms when President Trump started handing out pardons like candy and I'm sure he'll do it again because now Pandora's box is officially opened. Here's my personal opinion on this. You can't yell and scream that the house is on fire when you're the one that lit the match, right? And so I get it, Joe Biden is, or Hunter Biden is a target. Yeah, but didn't Gerald Ford pardon Nixon? So it started back then.

But yeah, I agree. But he did that for the good of the country because the country really was very divided. But a lot of people, a lot of people- And it's not now. No, it's not. We feel good. We're united.

Yeah, I feel good driving on the streets. I feel like it's so much more pleasant these days than it was even just four years ago. So much more pleasant. People are it was even just four years ago. So much more pleasant. Not people are not trying to murder me with their car at every turn because, and by the way, red lights have now just become suggestions here in Atlanta. You have to be fucking, this is insane. Where are the police officers to pull somebody over and make an example out of

somebody? Everyone is ignoring red lights in Atlanta, and I'm sure this is going on nationwide. And I know in Atlanta, like, anger driving, driving pissed off is a sport, I do it. But I gotta be honest, like, it's really dangerous. Very. People are not paying attention to red lights, or they are ignoring them altogether. It's like when the light turns red, it used to be when the light turns yellow, that means go faster. It used to be when the light turns yellow, that means four more cars. But by the time the light turned red, used to be, most people had stopped on the line.

Not anymore. Light turns red, it's six additional cars. Go. You have to really pay attention to getting out there in the middle of an intersection because people, I don't know, I guess we've just all lost our sense of law. I have no idea. But this goes back to like Hunter Biden and Joe Biden. I think this is a big mistake on Joe Biden's behalf because you can't claim to be the good guys living up to the standards of this and that and the other thing. And then when nobody's looking, and everybody's looking by the way, just go ahead and pardon your son for criminal activity. I know Hunter is a big target of the right,

and there's conspiracy theories left and right about the laptop, the laptop, the laptop, which is, I don't know. But I think this is not a great move on Joe Biden's behalf. But I also understand where Joe's coming from. It's his son, he's lost children before. And he's lost the election and Kamala lost too. So he's like, fuck it.

Yeah, he's like, fuck it. That's the way I saw it. He's like, fuck it. He's also 98 years old. So he's like, I'm going to live two more years. What do I care? I don't want my son to have to carry this weight on his back forever and ever. But I just think it's not a, I just don't think it's a great look.

But if I was president, I'd probably pardon my kid. I think I would too. Yeah, a little crack, some hookers, 500 million dollars from Ukraine. I mean, what are we talking about here? What's a little crack amongst friends? I don't know. Exactly. But you know, just to, I don't want to cast dispersions as I used to buy cocaine out of a kid's margarita cup and chilies. But you know. I gotta get some cocaine!

You're driving me crazy! You're driving me crazy! Good job, Christina. Good job, Christina. That's Christina on the buttons. Thank you. Thank you. That was hard. Christina's like, I've been waiting all show to use that one button. But you know, Hunter did have a bad addiction problem. I think that led to a lot of poor choices. I don't know how much criminality went on.

And you know, when you're a famous person and you are on the wrong side of the IRS, you're gonna be made an example of. That's just the truth. They can't go after everybody, so they go after the famous people, so that everybody else is scared to fuck with the IRS. And you know, so I get it, but at the same time, you know, what's good for the goose,

Chrissy, has got to be good for the gander. Yeah. If that is in fact what we're calling it, a gander. Isn't it, is it a flock or a gander? A flock of geese. Did we ever figure that out? It's a flock of geese? Yes.

Is it not? Christina says it's a flock of geese. I think we should trust what Christina says, because she seems like someone that might know information that we otherwise just guess on. This has been a show of Brian's musings and a complete misinformation, and now we might be fact-checked here and there. I think I like it. Can I just tell you a gander of the male goose? A gander? Okay, so what's good for the goose?

I've been waiting to tell you guys that for a really long time. Oh, thank you! All right. Thank you. We finally know. What's good for the goose? I've been waiting to tell you guys that for a really long time. Oh, thank you. All right. Thank you. We finally know. What's good for the goose? A female goose, right? It's good for the male goose. The male goose.

There you go. All right, well, listen, we have lots more exciting stuff to talk about here on today's episode. I'll figure it out on the break. We'll just let it flow. This is kind of our first foray. This is our first foray into the new studio, new setup. It's weird not to have a table to put my hands on.

It's weird not to be pressing buttons. I don't know what to do with my hands. So if I start grabbing my crotch at any point, Chrissy, remind me that's impolite at the dinner table. I will let you know. Thank you. And the jewel rolls. I will not be putting my hands on my jewel rolls.

Okay, let's take a break and yeah, we'll be back. In a shocking turn of events, it's me again, Christina, your producer and resident rom-com lover here at The Commercial Break. And I just have one thing to say. I'm just a producer standing in front of an audience, asking you to follow us on Instagram at the commercial break and on TikTok at TCB podcast. Text us or call us and leave

us a voicemail because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with TCB, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible. And while you're at it, go to our website, TCB podcast.com. But you don't have to because we like you just as you are. Now, if you immediately got those references, you're mycast.com, but you don't have to, because we like you just as you are. Now, if you immediately got those references, you're my kind of person, but it's time to take a break and listen to some sponsors, and then we'll get back to the show. This episode is sponsored by Pre-Alcohol from Z-Biotics. I am not one to imbibe a whole bunch anymore.

I've got 13 to 15 children, checklists to get done and jobs to do. But even with moderation, I don't bounce back like I used to from a night of drinking. I find myself having to make that choice. Can I have a great night or a great, responsible day tomorrow? A tough choice to make, indeed, that is until I found pre-alcohol. Zbiotic's pre-alcohol probiotic drink is the world's first genetically engineered probiotic. It was invented by a PhD scientist to tackle rough mornings after drinking. And here's how it works.

When you drink, alcohol gets converted into a toxic byproduct in your gut. It's this byproduct, not dehydration, that's to blame for that rough next day. Pre-alcohol produces an enzyme to break down this byproduct. And just as long as you remember to take pre-alcohol as your first drink of the night, then drink responsibly, you'll feel your best tomorrow. We've now been out for a few nights of drinking where pre-alcohol is the first thing that I drink. Let me tell you, when I can get up in the morning, take care of my 12 to 13 children, still record an episode of the commercial break, and make it to bedtime with a little bit of energy left in the tank to watch bad television, I know that pre-alcohol has done its job. And with the holiday season upon us, I know I'm going to be consuming just a little bit

more alcohol than usual, but with pre-alcohol I can stay on track and not let the holiday season throw me off course. Go to zbiotics.com slash commercial to learn more and get 15% off your first order when you use the code commercial at checkout. Zbiotics is backed by a 100% money-back guarantee, so if you're unsatisfied for any reason, they'll refund your money, no questions asked. Remember to head to zbiotics.com slash commercial and use the code commercial at checkout for 15% off.

Thank you to Zbiotics for being a sponsor of the commercial break and for making my mornings after drinking just a little bit easier. Bet MGM is an official sports betting partner of the National Hockey League and has your back all season long. drinking just a little bit easier. your favorite skater or your something every NHL fan is going to love about bad MGM download the app today and discover why bad MGM is your hockey home for the season.

Raise your game to the next level this year with bad MGM, a sports book worth a celly and an official sports betting partner of the National Hockey League that MGM dot com for terms and conditions must be 19 years of age or older to

wager Ontario only Please play responsibly. If you have any questions or concerns about your gambling or someone close to you, please contact Connex Ontario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge. Bet MGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. All right, so we're back.

Hey, guess what? What? Have you ever known a man to pee in a bottle next to his bed? Because he finds that it's too much to get to the bathroom. I have not have you Christine Have you ever run into a man who does this? No, that's disgusting It's absolutely horrid and I cannot believe that what I am reading, are you ready for this? New York Post, trusted source of all information. Women are venting that men store water bottles beside their beds so that they can urinate in them instead of getting up to use the bathroom. This disgusting hack has become a viral conversation

online where women are coming together and sharing stories about their partner who used the concept as a lazy excuse to stay horizontal. Hannah confessed that she thought it was customary for men to urinate in bottles. I thought it was acceptable for him to piss in a bottle. Horizontal, so you don't even, like, you can't even sit up? You can't even be bothered to sit up, I mean, to stand up and get next to your bed. This is the most fucking disgusting thing I've ever heard of in my entire life and I want to talk to the boys out there. Guys, where did we learn this? Who picked this up on a road trip when your dad says, I told you to go to the bathroom before we left? Okay, pissing in a bottle is then and only then acceptable because your father is telling you,

I'm not going to fucking stop the car and you better not piss yourself. Or if you're in a snowstorm. Okay. In Atlanta, that happened. People were shitting on the side of the road. I saw it. I saw a trucker taking a dump on the side of the road. It was really, but at that point I understood. I felt empathy for the guy. Yeah. What's he going to do? He's been eating bean burritos from QT all night long. He needs to get it out. But there is no acceptable version of I am not... Like... No, you're in your own home and you're having to do this and not sit up. I'm not motivated enough to walk 22 steps to the bathroom. It's probably not even that.

How does that even work? Because you would have to turn the bottle to then get your penis in the- I guess you turn to the side and then stick your dick in the bottle and then just pee and then what? Put the cap on it for the rest of the night? So gross. What the fuck is going on in here? I can't even believe it. It is absolutely fantastically gross. And guys, think- Stop. Don't do that.

This all started with Joe Rogan, I bet. I'll tell you why it started with Joe Rogan, I bet. I'll tell you why it started with Joe Rogan. Because he probably had some shit on that said it was okay to drink your own piss. And now everybody thinks piss is just yet another liquid we can keep around. Piss should go down a toilet, on a tree, or in the backyard, like every other good human being does. This is not an acceptable thing, guys. Get with it. Get up. Pull your morning boner together, and go fucking pee in the toilet. And that's the other thing.

You got a morning boner, that thing's sticking straight up, what are you doing? Putting the Gatorade bottle upside down and pissing in it? I've never even heard of this. No, it shouldn't be an option. It should be off the table. Absolutely. Totally agree, Chrissy. On this, we agree.

And so I thought to myself, this cannot be a truth. Like, this is not true. There are not many guys that are pissing. This is New York Post fiending for content like we do here at the commercial break. From them. Yes, from them. Piggybacking off of yet another piece of content that we need. So I go, okay, I'm going to do a little research on this.

And I didn't find one or three or 10. I found 30, 40 different posts where women were complaining about this or men were responding that yes, I do this, it's acceptable. And I just am blown away. This is a generation, whoever these degenerates are, that are pissing in bottles and leaving them next to the side of the bed until the morning. Do you clean them up in the morning? Or do you just collect them until the end of the week when the trash guy comes?

This is an unacceptable- Plus, think about the planet. Look at the bottles you're using. Well, you already used the bottle, I guess. At least you're reusing it. In that sense, I guess you're recycling. I don't know. Maybe there is some good that comes with this.

Yeah, but when you get the bottle away and that goes into the landfill. Listen, if it's yellow-leaded mellow, if it's brown, flush it down. That's what I got to say. That's right. I never, for two reasons. This is the only disgusting habit I think that I have regarding the bathroom, besides the actual bathroom, going to the bathroom part. I do not flush the toilet at night when I pee. I flush it in the morning because number one,

I don't wanna wake up the baby. They never wake up a sleeping baby. And number two, there's no need. If it's just yellow, let it mellow. Yeah, there's no number two. There's nothing to do. No number two. No number two. That's right to do. No number two. No number two. No number two.

That's right. I'm on board with that. Yes, that's right. That's approved. I gotta say guys, if you're one of these noodniks who are pissing in a bottle and leaving it on the side of the bed, it's amazing that a woman has even seen this.

It's amazing that a woman has even bed in your bedroom, let alone seen it and accepted it as a part of living with you. This is not a good look. There are a few things that you should just do, and one of them is actually going to the toilet when you have to fucking piss. Yeah, I mean, unless there's like some kind of medical reason that you're doing this. Have you ever been so fucked up that you have pissed yourself? No.

I have. I have. One time. One time. One time. I was at a got, this have, I have. One time. One time. One time. I was at a, I was very young. I was probably like 18 years old, 19 years old. We went to a friend's house. That friend lived with an older gentleman.

The guy was probably in his 30s. And the guy hated my friend, hated this guy I was hanging out with because he was this young, obnoxious, alcoholic who would just run around, bring people home late at night. This guy had like a real job. He had like a nine to five job. He was really, and here's why I say this. I'm saying this not to point or poke fun, but I'm saying this just to point out for the story. This guy was like morbidly obese. He was really, really big guy. Very, very sweet man when I met him.

But you could tell the look of disdain on his face when he saw this guy that I was hanging out with, this other guy named Brian that I was hanging out with. So two Brian's causing trouble with this guy. And- Running around town causing trouble. Yes. And the guy, he did not have an easy time moving. So when he was in bed, and then the couple times we would go to his house at night, rather than get up and, you know,

say, hey, it's time to go to sleep, he had a megaphone next to his bed, and he would scream into the megaphone, he would scream, you know, shut up! Which, it was an apartment, so I never understood. Now you're just causing more, but anyway, that's what he would do. And so, we would, so one night we come in there and we're twinkle-tozing around, because I'm like, I don't want to hear that megaphone, like it freaks me out. And it's one of the only times before I was 21 years old that I was actually really inebriated on alcohol. And we go to sleep, I sleep on the couch, I wake up on the couch, and I am, it's just sopping wet. And I realize that I have peed myself, but I didn't pee myself, like in the traditional sense. What I realized had happened, because the couch cushions were kind of

wet, but the under the couch cushions were really wet, right? And so what I did was I stuck my dick in between the couch cushions. God! And I pissed under the couch cushions. Oh my God. I was just- You like thought that was the toilet? I guess I thought that was something, a vagina. I don't know, I thought it was something. But that's the only time, the only time that I have ever peed outside of a toilet or a

tree. Good job. And as a grown man, I've never even thought of pissing in a bottle so you don't have to get up and walk around. No. Christina, would you be with a man that would… Just stop right there. Would I be with a man?

No. Would you be with a man? No. So, there we go. If you were with men at this time in your life, would you find any reason to stay with a guy if he was pissing in a bottle and leaving it on the side of the table? That's a deal breaker for me. For sure.

Absolutely not. That is the biggest red flag. First of all, I also don't want to touch your dick hands. Yeah! You know, like if you're laying in your bed and then you're like putting your hands on your penis to go pee, and then you got probably pee and penis on your hand, I don't turn around and touch me. Yes.

That's disgusting. It's all bad. It's all bad. And I'm just, I'm pleading with the guys out there. Learn a little bit of manners. It goes a long way. Manners and a little bit of chivalry. I know not everyone loves chivalry, but I still think it's, I still think it's not a bad thing. I think it's a nice way. Manners and a little bit of chivalry. I know not everyone loves chivalry, but I

still think it's not a bad thing to hold the door and be polite and say please and thank you and all that stuff. And for God's sakes, don't piss in your empty diet Coke can. What the fuck are we doing? Jesus, Chrissy. If I could get a hold of these guys. It all starts with Rogan. That's what I have to say. It all starts with him. Remember those people that were drinking piss and bathing themselves in the piss? No. You don't? Do I? I do. I couldn't forget it if I tried.

Oh, was that Tina that did that episode maybe? Because you were gone? Oh, I don't know. I don't know. Anyway, you remember that? Yeah, that was horrible. There was a couple and they would drink and shower in their own urine because it was life-giving. Basically they were crazy people who needed mental help and they were like, he was like living with their parents. And they were two really attractive human beings.

I'm talking like really attractive young human beings. And they were like staying with their parents for a period of time up in the Hamptons, of course in the Hamptons, because that's where all the kooky shit happens. They were in the Hamptons and they were bathing in their own urine. They were like pouring it on themselves and drinking it every 15, 20 minutes. It was really highly disturbing. And I think that's where maybe we get the sense

that pee is not that bad and we can keep it next to our bedside. Well, I mean, if you're stuck in a desert, you know, and you have to, or like stranded on a boat, you have to, but that's the only case. For that. I don't think there,

I think even if I was stranded on a boat, I don't think I'd go there. I think I'd just start drinking sea water. Yeah, or eating fish and hoping that the liquid from the fish. Okay. Yeah, I see myself as one of those guys who could just reach down on a,

like if I was on a life raft, I could just reach down and grab like a swordfish and just take a bite. I've had live octopus, you know, if I've had live octopus, why not take a bite out of a swordfish? Why not take a bite out of the belly of a swordfish? I'm picturing you're like a dinghy, you know, out in the middle of the ocean, stranded, just grabbing swordfish. Brian falls off a cruise ship. Yeah.

I just, I don't even grab it. I just stick my head in the water and come up with a swordfish on my mouth. Yeah. Yes. Well, I mean, you got to do something to survive out there. And without, you know, without the tools and resources, you just have to get smart. But I don't think drinking my own urine would be an option. I just don't. I have no desire to drink my own urine. But I say that think drinking my own urine would be an option. I just don't. I

have no desire to drink my own urine. But I say that, but I've never been stranded. Well, I was going to say, you never know what you're going to do when you have to survive. There was the, I just read that there was a fisherman, like 30 of them, that survived out in the ocean for like 38 days. I read that. In a dinghy or something like that. Yes. I don't know what the whole story was.

I read it about a week ago. But that to me is an ultimate nightmare. Yeah. I love the ocean. I love it when it's connected to a beach where I can see clearly how I get back to land. Unless I'm on like a huge cruise ship or a pretty solid boat, which I've been on a lot,

I've been on the middle of the ocean a lot, but I don't care to think about being stuck out in the middle of the ocean. No, that is definitely a nightmare. Space and the middle of the ocean, those two places seem very scary to me and I don't feel like there's a great reason to be out there, you know what I'm saying? So if I'm crossing, if I'm on my way on a huge cruise ship where it's unlikely something bad, terrible, tragic is going to happen, I feel comfortable.

Except a sickness on board. Oh my God, that's another thing. Well, yeah, I mean, there is a case of that carnival. I just remember. I feel like there was a bunch of them that happened kind of in a row a while back. Yeah, Carnival Cruises is the Kmart of cruising. Do you know what I'm saying?

If you look at Carnival Cruise videos, it's a certain price point and that leads to a certain crowd and it's a lot of fun and they encourage drinking and it's a party boat, basically. And it's for young couples and adults that like to really zhuzh it up. But I feel like carnivals where all the terrible things happen,

guys jump off the boat for TikTok, you know, they're doing TikTok videos. Remember that? The guy jumped off the boat for a TikTok video and a bunch of other stuff. But then carnival has like a series of mishaps. They've not handled all that well. Like the time that they were leaving Cancun,

the engine blew, there was a fire in the engine room, and they got stranded out in the middle of the ocean, being towed by essentially a tugboat, and it took them like eight days to get from where they were back to a port that could accept them. And because the engine had blown, they had to turn off all of the necessary plumbing, a lot of the electricity, there was no Wi-Fi, no air conditioning. So you're in the middle of the Gulf of Mexico,

the south of the southern part of the Gulf of Mexico, and it is blazing hot, it's the summer, and then you've got no plumbing, no electricity, no Wi-Fi, no AC. You've got food, but it's scarce. And now the guy, and I saw a documentary about this, the captain comes on at some point right after the fire happened where everybody thought they might actually have to jump off the ship. Luckily they don't. But then the captain comes on and says, you're going to have to pee in the shower and you're going to have to poo poo in a bag and then I want you to put it out in a trash can out in the middle of the hallway and we'll do our best to keep up with it. But of course, they don't have an incinerator because they've got no power. So they've got no power. They can't

burn the poop like they normally do. That was a nightmare. And the documentary, because this happened just a couple of years ago, there's lots of footage of what was going on. And so people were taking blankets and pillows and sleeping outside. It was miserably hot. Everybody's sweating. A lot of people were eating barely enough to stay alive because they didn't want to shit. Why didn't they have enough food? Because you can't cook it.

OK. Right? I think they had gas stoves, but they, you know, they have food, like they have non-perishables that they can, you know, pass out. No one starved. But they are not eating, not because there's not food on board, there was. And they could get like a, you know, I think they, at one point there was like a cargo ship that came and brought some supplies and water or something like that. Imagine. I'm sorry.

Imagine. There you go! I'm like throwing. Here's what I'm saying. I'm walking up to the top of the ship and I'm saying, hey, doc, Captain Doctor here, let's think about this reasonably. I'm walking up to the top of the ship and I'm saying, hey, Doc, Captain Doctor here, let's think about this reasonably. If you can get a cargo ship to bring us food, can't you get a cargo ship to take us off? Can we go somewhere else?

Can you get another Carnival cruise to just butt up next to us and we'll walk over and we'll get on that cruise and finish our drinking and gambling, please? But no, for some reason, Carnival makes the incredibly dumb decision to just leave everybody on board and go on this essentially hell journey for seven, eight days where shit's collecting in the middle of the hallways, everybody's sleeping outside and they have no stabilizers.

So the boat is literally at the mercy of the waves. So people are getting sick. No one has had a shower. So it's really becomes kind of this hellish landscape in this Carnival Cruise, which is otherwise supposed to be like, you know, the fucking Bonnaroo of cruises. Everyone's out there, you know, having fun and smelling like patchouli and drinking themselves silly. But no, Carnival says, no, wait,

we can't afford to get you off the boat and back to safety. So what we're gonna do is we're just gonna let you shit in a can for the next seven days and tow you back to wherever it is we're towing you to. That is another place where I think it would be acceptable to go ahead and pee in that bottle. Because then you have to pee in the shower. Doesn't that get a little weird after a while?

You have no running water, you're peeing in the shower? Yeah. Yeah. Oh, God. The whole thing's, I mean, they're not cruising anymore. I know. Maybe they just decided I'm not taking cruises anymore. Well, this was a big discussion actually, because my dad just went on this cruise. And so, you know, people over at Thanksgiving and the place that I went to afterwards were asking like, oh, how's your dad? Where's, what's he doing? And whatever. And so I said

he was on a cruise and it became a big topic of discussion amongst everybody about if you would cruise, do you cruise, da da da, the over the overwhelming majority did not want to and did not. The overwhelming majority decided they didn't want to cruise. Yeah. At all. Yeah. And what were the what were the reasonings? Well, a couple of people said that they didn't like the fact of being just out in the middle of the ocean like that and not being able to see land. I cited the sicknesses that have happened on board. Plus, I don't think I want to be shuffled around.

Like if I like a place I want to stay, hang out, enjoy it, explore it, not be like, oh, time to get back at five o'clock to the boat. Yeah, and if you're not back at five o'clock, they are leaving your ass. There are so many videos out there, it's fun, it's a game. You can go Google it. There's so many videos of cruise ships leaving people

because they didn't get back on time and they think they're special. They think they're the hero of the story and that they're gonna be allowed back on the boat if they're at five oh two. It doesn't work that way. They are going regardless if they're at 502. It doesn't work that way. They are going regardless if you're there or not.

I mean, I see how it's a good way to see a lot of places in a short amount of time. You kind of get to touch on things and I'm sure there's some beautiful scenery. But yeah, for me, and don't get me wrong, if someone gave me an all-expense paid trip on a cruise, I'd go and I would make the most of it and have fun. But here's what I would say about cruising, having been on a number of them. I didn't think I would be a cruise person. And then I became a cruise person, but I didn't become a cruise person. We went on a Mediterranean cruise for 10 days, incredible, lovely, but there was a lot of rushing back and forth.

But we made the choice to stay out of the crowds. We didn't go on like the tours and stuff like that. We made our own way. But that in and of itself presents its own challenges. But since we were in Europe and some places we had been, we felt like, okay, we can navigate this. But there is a clock and it is ticking and it doesn't allow for a ton of time to do anything. You're there for like 10 hours, max 10 hours, and you got to get back. It's not a lot of time to go to Rome and see a bunch of stuff. Maybe you go to the Trevi Fountain, you come back, right?

That's it. Did you have any people on that cruise that were late to get back? We had one couple that there was consternation because the couple was not found. They didn't come back and they weren't in communication. And I remember the captain coming back, but something, but he, he let us know later that everything was fine. But they're, we're saying, yeah, I think that's what happened. Yeah, go without me. I'm done. I didn't like

cruising, but like their luggage was on board, but they were gone. It was something, some kind of event that happened on the, on the cruise ship that was talked about. But I remember that it all, it all turned out okay. I've never been on a cruise where like someone died or anything like that. But I will say this, the cruise ship in and of itself has to be the thing. You don't go, you can go for the locations,

but the locations are not going to be where you're spending the most of your time. Yeah, I was gonna say it's kind of like a hotel on sea. I find that to be fascinating. I find it to be fascinating that you're floating on the of your time. Yeah, I was gonna say, it's kind of like a hotel on sea. I find that to be fascinating. I find it to be fascinating that you're floating on the Empire State Building essentially, or an entire city, and you can, we went on that oasis of the seas, I think it was,

at the time, the second largest cruise ship in the world, and they've built even bigger cruise ships since then. It, I was- It is fascinating. I did not get to every corner of the ship, I was on it for 10 days, I didn't get to everything there was to see. Certainly didn't do everything.

17 restaurants, just so. Nightclubs, right, theaters. Bars, theaters, game rooms. Roller skating, yeah. Multiple pools, shows, aquatic center, a park in the middle of the boat. Not only do they have a huge atrium where there's like a shopping mall,

but they have an actual park growing trees and flowers and manicured bushes. And then around it, there's like walking trails and then there's restaurants around it. It's like you're in a little like New York City village. It was really quite amazing. Yeah, I guess you're right. That has to be what you're going for. You have to go for that. You have to go for that because you're not going for the poo-poo in the middle of the hallway. That you're not going for, for to go for that. You have to go for that. Because you're not going for the poo-poo in the middle of the hallway. That you're not going for, for sure. Anyway, we're here to talk about more pee and poop

on your Friday afternoon. So let's do this. Let's take a break, and then we'll get back with more shit talking, literally. We'll be back. In case you guys were wondering, I am currently trapped in the closet in the studio being forced to record liner after liner

and I never get to leave. So help me by following us on Instagram at the commercial break and on TikTok at TCB Podcast and go to our website, tcbpodcast.com for more information about Brian and Chrissy and access to our massive catalog of video and audio episodes. Now please text us at 212-433-3TCB

and tell Brian and Chrissy to let me out of the closet. Oh man, that's funny. The Brady Fiegels. Have you heard about the Brady Fiegels? I have not heard about the Brady Fiegels. All right. Here's the story. I want you to imagine that you go to a doctor's office to go to get a treatment for a problem. You're a professional athlete, you're playing semi-pro baseball, you're a pitcher, and you've got to get Tommy John surgery. So you walk into this brand new doctor's office you've never seen before, you're going to get this surgery because you know this doctor has done it before, this surgeon's done it before and he's good, but this is your consultation appointment. You walk in and the nurses and the staff and the doctors all welcome you as if they've

seen you before and swear up and down, we've seen you before. And your name is Brady Feigl, your birth date is the same, you are the same person we have seen before. And your name is Brady Feigl, your birthdate is the same, you are the same person we have seen before. How have you not been here? And this Brady Feigl swears up and down, I have never been here, this is the first time I'm coming. But no, everybody insists, you have been here before. We have a picture of you. We have your name. You're the same person. How are you, what are you talking about? Is everything okay?

Are you mentally unstable? Have you lost your fucking marbles? You're already being treated for this condition. No, I'm not. I've never been here before. It turns out that Brady Feigl, a very distinct looking human being, has another doppelganger named Brady Feigl who is a very distinct looking human being.

No way! And in fact, they look like twins. They are exactly the same human being, almost. There are little differences in their face that I can see. Can you see it, Christina? Yeah, you can, here, I'll show you the picture of this. Were they in fact twins? They were not.

They were separated at birth, they didn't know? Here is the weirdest thing. Of course, everybody says they must be twins. They both play professional ball, semi-pro ball. They both are pitchers. They both had the exact same injury at the exact same time, went to the exact same doctor to get the exact same treatment, looking exactly the same with the same name. That's wild. They are both the same height. They are almost exactly alike.

I mean, there are a little bit of difference. You can tell the difference, but not much. My twin brother looks less like me than these two look like each other. This is an amazing, amazing story that really fucking freaks my hairy tees out. It gives me goose bumps because are we in a simulation? And the simulation has glitched, and it's made a doppelganger. It's made two of the same, because are we in a simulation? And the simulation has glitched

and it's made a doppelganger, it's made two of the same, and it forgot that it made two of the same. This world could not handle two Brian Greens. Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. But we've all, I imagine we've all been somewhere at some point and someone has said, you look exactly like, you act exactly like, you talk exactly like

a guy I knew in college, a friend I had somewhere, a lady I met at the bar. This has probably happened to every person on earth because there are doppelgangers out there. And I guess at the end… They're usually not with the same exact birthday. I think you just don't run into your doppelganger most of the time. I guess so. birthday. I think you just don't run into your doppelganger most of the time. I think you're not like, you're not running into that. This is like, I think the way in which this happened and the fact that they have the same profession, they're the same height and have the same name and they are not related. There is no DNA connection to them whatsoever. Really? Which is what you would

assume. The Brady Fiegels are connected by genes, but they are not in fact connected by genes. They are just two really similar people that in fact play the same sport, have the same imagery, are the same height. I mean- Have the same name. Have the same name. Geez.

Fuck the same girl. I don't know. I mean, at the end of the day- And live in the same town, I guess. Well, I guess they must live around each other, right? Yeah, because they go to the same names, fuck the same girl, I don't know, I mean at the end of the day. And live in the same town I guess. Well I guess they must live around each other, right? Yeah, because they go to the same doctor. They went to the same doctor. Now I guess it's not unusual that when you're in a semi-pro league that there's a surgeon

that everyone goes to, they trust, they like, right? I mean that probably happens in a lot of sports, like this guy's the best, you gotta go to this guy or girl. But yes, at the same time, to have the same injury, to go in for the same treatment, and to find out this way, to have everybody look at you like you're fucking crazy, like, no dude, you have clearly been here before, is really, really strange. And I would, I guess, posture, I would say that maybe we all have a doppelganger out there, not the same name, not the same height, not the same, you know, width.

Hold on one second. We're in the studio. Listen, this is all part of getting used to a new studio, too. You got it. There you go. You got it. This is all part of it. We're kind of stumbling around our words here because Christina, like on her hair on fire, is running around the

studio pressing buttons. It's like, it's not working. It's not working. We have like, now we have multiple camera angles, but here's the dumbest fucking thing in the world. Good job, Christina, by the way. It's these two. It's one and two, by the way, that go out. So, you just press the shutter button. Here's the dumbest thing in in two by the way that go out. So do you press the the shutter button? Here's the dumbest thing in the world. Look at back to Brady Feige's. Here's the dumbest thing in the fucking world It is almost nearly impossible to find a camera with what's called a clean HDMI feed That is good enough to use in a studio now They make them very expensively but to get an inexpensive one one that's under a thousand dollars

You can get like, we use Canon here in the studio, we use these Canons, and there are only a few that actually do the clean HDMI feed, meaning they don't have all of the information that's on the screen, like the exposure rate, you know, the lighting, okay? So it's called the clean HDMI feed because it allows for a clean image without any writing on it In Europe there is a law that you cannot have a Video camera and a camera be the same thing So the camera companies to get around this law have installed a time limit on how much you can record with the video camera

I think it's like 42 minutes and 60 seconds, some bullshit random number that makes it not a video camera, but just a regular camera. I guess when you only take 30 minutes of video, that means it's not a video camera. So in order to sell their cameras all around the world, the camera companies have to make their cameras shut off at a certain time. So in order to find cameras that don't shut off in a certain time. So in order to find cameras that don't shut off in a certain time limit, it's really difficult. And so we have these cameras in the studio, they shut off after a certain amount of time. They essentially go dark. And so that's why

Christina has to run around and reset them. Well, this is the first time this has happened because this is the first time we're recording an episode in the studio. Very well done by Christina. I like to watch her run around. Makes me feel good when I write in that page. So these are European cameras? Well, they're all European cameras. I guess we're her run around. Makes me feel good when I'm writing that paycheck. So these are European cameras? Well, they're all European cameras. I guess we're all European at the end of the day. It's kind of like people.

We're all European at the end of the day. So these Brady Feigles, this is really freaking me out. That is a freaky thing. And would you want to meet your doppelganger? Sure. Yeah, you think? You'd want to meet the person that looks exactly like you? It talks exactly like you?

It would be very strange, but why not? The curiosity would be there. You know what? I think it would be a good idea to put like a website together, like a Tinder for doppelgangers. Put an image. AI goes out there and finds similar-looking people, and then you just flip through it until you find one that's exactly like you, and then you connect with them. You say, hey, doppelganger, like the doppelganger website, I think this is a brilliant idea that someone's going to take and they're going to make a billion dollars. I'm going to still be here doing the 58 days of TCB for fucking no reason. It's like the DD Cantor.

Oh, the DD Cantor. That one's gone. That idea's already gone. Someone took that one. Well, yeah. That was us. Yeah, that one's gone. That idea's already gone. Someone took that one. Well. That was us.

Yeah, but you know what? I don't wanna have to go to my family functions and be like, so what do you do? I make dick, I make dick wine distributors. I make dick-shaped wine canters. Yeah, exactly. Oh, do you? Oh, well congratulations.

I already feel embarrassed enough about the commercial break. Well, I was gonna say, right. But, you know, I don't have to say I talk about dick-shaped decanters. I can tell them I talk about something else. I always make it sound much more lame than it actually is. I'm like, yeah, it's just me and my friend and we're talking. We're talking about each other's lives.

It's like you and your friend, when you talk about, you know, the inside of an asshole. When you talk about the other's lives. It's like you and your friend, when you talk about, you know, the inside of an asshole. When you talk about the poop cruise. Right. Yeah, when you're with your friend. You're funny. Peed in a jar. That's right. When you and your buddy get together and talk about all your sexual exploits live on air. Yeah, I think, I don't know if I'd want to, I was thinking about this. I don't know if I'd

want to meet my doppelganger. I don't know if I'd want to connect with my doppelganger. I think, I don't know if I'd want to, I was thinking about this, I don't know if I'd want to meet my doppelganger. I don't know if I'd want to connect with my doppelganger. I think that'd be a little freaky if like there was someone that looked exactly like me and talked like me and had same mannerisms and stuff and they were sitting down. But there was this one girl that I worked with at the steakhouse and she was from, oh, no, no, no, no, too soon. We can't do that one anymore. Sorry, Diddy. Big baby oil. See what big baby oil has done to us? Censorship. That's what's going on. It's all big baby oil's fault. Big corporate baby oil. So this girl was from New Mexico. That's where she had grown up and she had moved, I don't know, a couple years earlier and she got this job, she was a waitress. And she swore up and down, and I mean, if she didn't say it at least once a day, she

swore up and down that I had a doppelganger that looked like me, spoke like me, had the same mannerisms as I did, was just as animated. She was like, I swear, this guy that I knew back in New Mexico, he was you. And, you know, you take that on faith, you take that for what it's worth. It's like, you know, with a grain of salt, essentially. Some people say that though, too. And then I would see the person and be like, I don't think they really look like me. But that's, you know, so could be a perspective. Now, this Brady situation, they really do look exactly like each other. They really do look exactly alike.

I've had people tell me I look like Jason Statham is what I get a lot, especially if I wear a certain type of clothing. People are like, oh, you look so much like Jason Statham. And I'm like, yeah, I don't know. That guy is a man of action. I'm a man of inaction. That guy's motivated. I'm unmotivated.

That guy has motivated. I'm unmotivated. That guy has a career. I have a middling podcast that I'm trying to make a living doing. I mean, besides the obvious discrepancies and body type with Jason Statham, I really don't think I look anything like Jason Statham, but some people claim that I do. What is the weirdest person that you've ever met, like famous? Have you ever had someone come up to you and go, oh my God, you look exactly,

remember that girl on Love is Blind who claimed that she looked like, oh right, right, right, right. Kim Kardashian? Megan Fox. Megan Fox, that's right. Yes. Do you remember that?

Yes, oh of course. And then everyone was like, ah! Ah! That was a big deal. You're looking at Jason Statham. Yeah, clearly not Brian. You're just bald. Yeah, besides the receding airline, I think me and Jason don't have a lot in common.

He's handsome. I missed that boat. I fell off the turnip truck. If you're going to need somebody to come up to you and say, oh, you look like, and then you're like, I don't look like that person. Yeah, who did I used to get? It was the Ashley Judd. And I think it was just the way my eyebrows were

or something, I don't know. There was some resemblance. I could see Ashley Judd a little bit. Yeah, I've gotten that quite a few times, but I don't think that I look like her, but I love her. But I could see that. I could see that too.

I could see that. She's got a picture of Ashley Judd up on right now. And I think there are some similarities, like your cheekbones, your noses. Yeah, maybe your eyebrow, your hair certainly kind of looks like Ashley Judd's. Who did I get one time and I was like, you're out of your fucking mind.

Was that show My So-Called Life? Oh yeah, yeah. Do you remember that? Of course. It was like- That's in my wheelhouse. Yeah, Google that. Jared Leto? No, the. Yeah. Do you remember that? Of course. There was like, um... That's in my wheelhouse. Yeah. Google that. Jared Leto? No, the other guy. Um...

Jason... Devin...Gummersoll? No, the... Brian Crickow? The guy who was in all... The guy who shows his penis in all those movies. Do you know what I'm talking about? You know what I'm talking about? Jason...

I can't remember his name. Was it My So-Called Life? Or was he in that other one? I can't remember. I don't know My So-Called Life or was he in that other one? I can't remember. I don't know, you're giving us little clues to work off of here. No, it's not Jared though. Penis showing.

Oh, oh, oh, I'll find it and I'll tell you. Yeah, penis showing. He shows his penis and all the way, forgetting Sarah Marshall. He's in Forgetting Sarah Marshall. Oh, that, Jason Segal. Jason Segal, someone told the other guy Jason Segal and I was like, Jason Segal?

What are you talking about? Besides the obvious comparison of the two small dicks, I really... Did he show his dick in a lot of movies? He's shown his dick in like three movies, yes. And you know, it's nothing to laugh at, but it's certainly nothing to show off either. But I always appreciated that Jason showed his dick

in movies. He went for it. He went for it. He went for it. He went full frontal. And I thought to myself, the first time you see it in Forgetting Sarah Marshall, you're like, wow, that's a real penis. Like there's no prosthesis about it.

That is a real, because if there's a prosthesis, they would make it look much more impressive. Right. But then you think to yourself, okay, Jason did it. And now it's out there. And there's now there's some parity between the men and the women because Jason went full frontal despite his shortcomings.

Yeah, we've talked about that before. There should be equal, equal nudity. Listen, watch any of those shows that, what's his name, puts together that, who's the guy who did the... Sam Levinson, is that what you're talking about? No, not, Sam Levinson. By the way the... Sam Levinson, is that what you're talking about? No, Sam Levinson. By the way, love Sam Levinson. I think he has, they're hyper-sexualized shows.

You don't like it? I don't like him. You don't like him? Okay, well, him, do you like his shows? Yeah, but I think they're exploitative. I agree. I think they're hyper-sexualized, right? I don't think that's representative of how teenage...

What are those shows? I can't remember what Sam, I can't, off the top. The HBO one that he's. Euphoria. Euphoria. Oh, that guy, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think it's the best example of hypersexualized show. And I love Euphoria, but I think it is a full on,

fantasical, I mean, fanciful drama. It is not an accurate representation of what happens as a teenage. Not everyone's beautiful and getting laid 24 hours a day and going to parties that clearly... I mean, if I went to one party like Sam Levinson makes people seem like they're partying, it would have been the best night of my life. I mean, it just would have been magical. But not every party happens like that. There's not dark ambient lighting and great music and everyone's beautiful dancing with each other and you get laid by snapping your fingers. I mean, it doesn't happen like that in high school. It's embarrassing and clunky and weird. And I just don't think he does

a good job of like making it very accurate. And Sam himself has, you know, some issues. But anyway, Zendaya is great in euphoria, by the way. Zendaya is great. I fell in love with her watching that show. So, now we're in love. I saw your eyes go off to Zendaya. Zendaya! You saw me float off into Zendaya land? Yeah, I saw that, yes. Yeah. Well, she really parlayed her, career into huge lots of stuff now. She did but not Sam Levinson

I was talking about the guy who made the Aaron Hernandez story the Ryan Murphy Ryan Murphy Ryan Murphy is an equal opportunity nudist nude shower because he there's a lot of dicks and men's asses in his there's a lot of dicks and men's asses in his shows. And while it can be a little much for me, like that's not what I, you know, I'm just a guy, right? That's not what I prefer to see. I appreciate it. I'm like, okay, well, there you go.

For a long time, it's been all tits and ass, and now we got a little dick and balls. Let's bring it in. I say, hey, I'm all about it. There should be more penis in shows. And so that's why the commercial break is now, every episode is on YouTube with Brian, no pants. Pantsless.

I'm going to do pantsless episodes of the commercial break. Instead of smartless, we're pantsless. The 12 inches of TCB. The 12 inches of TCB, now available on Spotify Video. Gather around the tree. Gather around the Christmas tree and watch Brian's penis shrink. It's cold outside. What can I say? It got cold in Atlanta. It did. Quick. It did get cold in Atlanta. Woof. I know. You know, talking about weather is like the lowest form of conversation, but when it gets this cold this quick, everybody talks about the weather.

You have to mention it. Yeah, I went to the bank and she's like, oh, it's so cold outside. And I'm like, yeah, you're inside. What are you talking about? And then my kids refuse to wear outer layers. They just refuse to do it. Why do kids do that? I don't know.

Ours used to do the same thing. We're like, you need a jacket same thing I know they hate it they hate bundling up and then they get outside and I'm like oh me daddy I'm cold and I'm like I told you two feet ago to fucking put on a jacket and you refuse because it didn't go with your outfit or whatever reasoning you have god bless my daughters daughters daughters daughters daddies and their daughters lifelong trauma Lifelong trauma for both parties. I might add lifelong trauma for both parties. All right Well 12 days of TCB right around the corner. Don't miss it 12 brand new episodes of the commercial break for the Christmas season

You didn't ask for it, but we're giving it to you text us 212-433-3TCB 212-433-3822 if you thought so you liked something that went on this year in 2024 and you like us to touch on it again we just might do that because we're running out of content ideas so please do yes Hurry up and get to me. 212-433-3822. Texts, questions, comments, concerns, consents, ideas. We take them all voicemail or text message. Now available on youtube.com slash the commercial break.

Every episode of the commercial break moving forward on YouTube. Camera angles provided by Christina and her brand new toy over there. Don't break it, it costs a lot of money. So go to youtube.com slash The Commercial Break or at The Commercial Break. You can put that into the, you can put at The Commercial Break into the search bar.

Up it will come. Please subscribe, like, comment on your favorite video. At The Commercial Break, also on Instagram. Please go ahead and follow us I'll say it for the 50,000 time. Please put us out of our misery and give us a follow TCB podcast on tik-tok and TCB podcast comm is the website all the audio all the video Okay, Christina tea Christina Chrissy. I guess that's all I can do for today. I think so.

But I'll tell you that I love you. Well, I love you. I'll say best to you. Best to you. And best to you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I do say, we will say, and we must say, good bye. ED, I have it!