The Commercial Break - The Crackhead Casanova

Episode Date: May 20, 2020

The Bits; Darklord Freedom Fighter calls Macys. The Show: Bryan and Hoadley breakdown a video from the worlds creepiest man. A man who claims to be a 'pick up artist". Listen as they critique his artistry! Don't forget to rate and subscribe so you never miss an episode! Text us or leave us a voicemail at +1-661-BEST2YO ([phone]) LINKS: Get a FREE TCB limited edition collectible sticker Follow us on Instagram Subscribe and watch the show on Youtube Join us live on Fireside New episodes every Tuesday & Friday everywhere you listen to podcasts! For advertising contact AdvertiseCast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hello, I'm investigating a global conspiracy to overthrow the democratically elected president of these United States, so can I talk to your bedding department? Greg, thank you again. That is not my name, ma'am. My deep state eliminator name is Freedom Fighter Dark Lord 300. That's right, I'm sorry you're Lord shit. Come on now, you know this is serious. Right, sorry you're freedom, this.

Okay, I'll connect you right away, but this is the last phone call I'm connected. Thank you. Maga, Trump, 2024. Macy's bedding department where we love the fold the bowl right over your eyes. How can I help you? Yes, I am a freedom fighter and I am investigating a global conspiracy to overthrow our democratically elected president and ruler Donald J. Trump. I need to ask you a few questions.

The Communist Party will stop at nothing and neither will I. We both know Fidel Castro is alive and well and living in a bunker under the Pirates of the Caribbean Ride in Disney World right now. It is my belief that your betting store is ground zero for the national security headquarters of the Alliance to drain the swamp. I have been chosen by some very powerful men to make sure there are no global elite traders inside of your organization trying to stop the draining of that swamp. I have been deputized by the director of the 4 Chain Group, radical squire, doppelganger 3000. We have been trained to look for signs of globalist elite spies and

the ranks of the organization we serve. I'm going to need to ask you some questions, it's your patriotic duty to answer those questions truthfully so I don't have to come down. Oh lord, if I answer these questions, will you please not come down here and disrupt the business like you did last week? I was well within my rights to serve citizen arrest on that gentleman looking at the sleeper king mattresses. I heard him speaking in Spanish on the phone and that gave me a clear indication of his intentions to overthrow our government.

Well within my rights. Well, at least certainly see things differently, but what are your questions? Okay, I have taken these questions straight from the Koyanon board on the dark web and I am authorized to ask them under section 331 of the Kannon Ministries Guide lines. First question, true or false. Elite scientists from Google and Verizon wireless have been visiting your department store to install 5G microwave transmitters underneath all full-size mattresses. Why do you mean the good fuck are you talking about this week, Greg? Please ma'am, you must refrain from using my globalist-given name.

The quicker you answer these questions, the quicker I can ascertain whether or not it's safe to be at your location. No, dark lord, or whatever you call yourself. I have not seen anybody from Google or Verizon at this location. As a matter of fact, I've only had three customers all day. Were any of those customers Tom Hanks, Jeff Bezos, or Bill Gates? No, why would they shop here? Did any of those customers appear to have a tail or walk like a dog on all four? Did you say dog, DOG?

Yes, I did. Oftentimes, the globalist elite will shapeshift into dog people and lizard people and walks amongst humans. Only specially trained individuals can spot one of them. So I don't blame you for not noticing. I'm gonna mark that down as a me. Nope, nope, nope, nope, nope. I said under no circumstances,

no circumstances where they're dog people. Mem, if you would just answer the questions and let me come to an investigative conclusion, please, question number two. As anyone from the Children's clothing department told you about a secret hallway that leads to the basement of the building where small Scottish children may be held captive so that Zionist Democrats can drink their blood. Oh my god, Greg.

I know this may come as a surprise to you, but the secret leaders running the surf have been drinking children's blood for thousands of years and only until recently has been keeping the secret from all of us. Due to secret Facebook posts and groups, I am privy to information that would shock even the most hardened of investigators. I know it's a gruesome situation, but I'm a trained professional. I have a 4.5 star ranking on 4chan for truth and accuracy. Okay, great.

You really have to stop going onto that website. It's making you a big delusional. I think you need to take a nice long break from the dark web. Exactly what a global elite spy would say to me, unmarking that down for further investigation. Why me? Question number three, it has been widely reported on Twitter that John L.J. Trump has been receiving secret security briefings near the service leapers in the back of your department.

Can you confirm or deny those reports? No, don't you think I know if the president of the United States was in the bedding department of Navy? Not necessarily, there are two Donald Trumps. The one you see on TV, which is the body double, or body doubles, and the one that's really running the country, arresting pedophiles, to mucking the coronavirus conspiracy, and working to save the middle class from enslavement by the pigs in the European Union. There may be a slight difference in appearance, and you may not be able to tell the difference.

As a matter of fact, Donald Trump may look like Chuck Norris in real life. As you must your grit, Greg. Okay, can you tell me if you've seen Anderson Cooper in handcuffs in the men's formal wear department? Again, it's been widely reported that he's been arrested for attempting to steal secret government documents related to friendly aliens who can mind Bitcoin through mental telepathy. These documents have been stolen to stop Trump from revealing the true intent of these

altcoin aliens and illizard people's servants. The only way to drain the swamp is to take down the worldwide pedophilia ring run by Hillary Clinton and her child slave army. Greg, I have to go. I want you to stop this foolishness and please go clean your room. I will not take orders from the slaves of the macy Zionist overlords. No, but you will clean your room or you will pay rent. I am marking you down for further investigation. You are getting in the way of very important work. Greg, I am your mother and you will listen to me. Mom, I can't help but if you decide to work a grounds year from the most important

queue that ever happened in the history of the universe. No, but you can help whether or not the dominoes, pizza boxes are on the floor of my base. Pizza is the only safe thing I can eat. You know that all the food at the grocery stores is poisoned by Bill Gates and baby killing vaccine machines inside of those organizations. The Builder Bears have you brainwashed? That is now very clear to me. Greg, you realize if you don't stop calling me and clean your room, I'm going to unplug your computer, take away your dungeons and dragons cards, and cut off your credit card.

You would be taking a page right out of the global elite playbook. Which playbook is this Greg? You're 33, living in my basement, unemployed, taking orders from an imaginary friend on four-chann, who claims to be a secret government official. Did you want to check with the playbook called Reality Greg? Or do you want to continue to play pretend spy games with your buddies on the internet? Mom, you don't understand! No one understands, Greg.

You and your band of Mary Misfits are delusional. Why would someone with secret government information give it to Greg, the jobless, moneyless amateur video gamer from Road Hills, Michigan. Why? I do have skills. I have skills to investigate and uncover things unlike the fake media. Greg, you cannot even investigate the help wanted section of the newspaper. Okay, you know what?

When Obama takes over the office of the presidency for the eighth term in 2036 and you're living under Communist rule, don't call me. I won't have to call you. You'll still be in my basement. You did never support me. I do support you. I support you checking into a facility and getting the help you so desperately need. Okay, I'm done with this. Don't expect to see me for dinner. I'm eating in my room tonight. Well, you act as if that's a punishment for your father and I. That would be a refreshing change.

And do not bring that damn BB gun upstairs anymore. What are you? That beauty fucking dog. That is the pellet gun capable of incapacitating free basins that mean it's harm and safely taking down commies. Well do you think that gun could help you take down the job with a paycheck? Fine, whatever. Bye Greg, remember to clean that room or the internet goes aww. MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM In early 2020, the world shut down. Stores, restaurants, schools, and whole communities shut their doors in an effort to protect human

life. As the world quickly changed, one man went on Facebook to get a degree in Internet epidemiology. Brian, along with his lab assistant coach, are curing coronavirus by commenting on fake news and reposting recipes of secret virus cures from a friend of a friend who works high up in government. Join Brian and Holy as they discuss the world and life doing this forced interruption. Learning, laughing, and loving

in this real life commercial break. On this episode of the Commercial Break, I'm gonna leave it up to you as from a woman's point of view to tell me what you think of what this guy is saying because it's absolutely fucking insane. I don't need to mentally cripple another human being so that I can take it the advantage of them. It seems like a lot of work.

But before we start, before we dig in to the 20 secrets, our Debenair dip shit has a warning for everybody. The next episode of the commercial break starts now. So, welcome to show number six. Hot test number six. We're shooting up the charts in Spain. I have no fucking idea. So Ireland. Hola, como está mi amigos?

Como está mi misuegra? Y misuegro? Hello, how are you friends? How are you? I'm good and I'm good and I... I don't know how to say brother and wife, but I say hello to Danny, hello to Gustavo, hello to you, hello, hello, because Apple keeps track, they have charts and there's a couple of different websites where you can go look at these charts. Now Apple keeps this a secret, so I really have no fucking idea why we're on the charts or how we're on the charts. But I will say that we've had much more success than I ever expected when I turned on the microphone just a short while ago. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.com and you can leave us a note. And if we like what you're saying, maybe we'll address it on the show. And remember, when we get to 500 listens on one particular episode, which we're getting closer and closer every episode, 500 listens on one particular episode, we will do a live show for you, the audience, all around the world.

That's Spain, the Netherlands, Ireland, Canada, Ontario, Canada loves the commercial break and I have no fucking idea why. Absolutely, with love to go to Ontario, came in. Oh man, would that be awesome? Oh my god. We'll get there too. Like eventually we'll get to the place

where we just go and see people that really like the podcast, but we have been listening to in Argentina in almost every state in the United States, Spain, Tunisia. There is a fan in Tunisia who keeps listening to the show. Don't ask me what I'm doing. What up Tunisia?

We love you. I wish I knew what your language you were and I would say hello to you, but I don't want to seem racist on the show. So I'm just gonna say, hello from America, Tunisia, and to all my Irish brethren. I'm going to say hey y'all. Yeah, I'm from the South in Atlanta. Yeah, so show number six and I've got it doozy for you today. My friend Chrissy Hodley do tell oh I'm having way too much fun digging into the deep dark crevices

of the internet and this is one I've been keeping an eye on for a while long before I had the idea to have a podcast like this. I have been keeping an eye on what's called the PUA community. You know what the PUA community is. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no idea. I have no. I have no. I have no. I have no. I have no. I have no. I have no. I have no. I have no. I have no. I have no. I have no. I have no. I haveiest of shittie. I am so forlorn over the pickup artist community and the shitty horrible abusive tactics that they teach people on how to pick up mainly women. Now there are dating, they call themselves online dating coaches a lot of times, but they're really just pickup artists trying to teach you how to manipulate women into wanting to be with you or wanting to sleep with you.

And the unfortunate part is there's a sucker born every minute and there's plenty of suckers listening to these guys. I swear that this guy that we're about to play some clips from is some of the worst dating advice that have ever run across these tender ears. I'll be the judge of that. Okay. I'm going to leave it up to you as from a woman's point of view to tell me what you think of what this guy is saying because it's absolutely fucking insane.

But I want to recognize a few things before we get into this, right? Okay. I do recognize that being single can be a truly agonizing state of affairs. We've all been there for periods of time, right? Grass is always greener on the other side. And when you you're single you want to be with somebody and sometimes with somebody You just want to be single Sure, but I get that it can't be an agonizing state of affairs I also get that not everybody has the same prowess to meet and attract a partner

It's not easy for everybody to get out there and It doesn't fall into a lot of people's laps, right? And I'm in a mainly thinking from a guy's perspective because I'm a guy that there are a lot of men out there in America and around the world that believe that they're never gonna get laid, that they're never gonna meet a woman, they have horrible self-esteem topped with crippling social anxiety, right?

So it's very difficult for them to get out of the house, let alone go and meet somebody. And these dating apps are making it worse, not better because you can ghost people. And you know, it's just not a, and the only thing that you're looking at on a dating app is how somebody looks. So these guys have, if they're, you know, looking a little less homely, they have no opportunity to meet women. And there's communities out there that take this to the extreme, like the in-sell community. You know what in-sell is? I have no idea. Involuntarily celibate. And these are group of men who identify as involuntarily celibate and believe that the game is rigged, that they will

never get laid, that women are horrible creatures that are walking around just waiting to basically step on their dicks. Thoughts become things. Thoughts become things, but I empathize. I mean, some of them are violent. I don't empathize with all of that, right? There have been a couple of mass shootings and stuff like that. By guys who identify as in cells and they're taking their aggression out on innocent victims, and I absolutely in no way do I think that that's a

a good use of your fucking time like if you take it like it's not gonna help you track them into shoot people in the middle of the street in Cincinnati that's for sure but I do empathize with the mentality because you know I've been there I've been that you know, there's dry, I've had dry spells too. For me, I'm not a pickup artist. Like I've never really gone in and picked women up. I just, they just happen to be in the vicinity

of conversation strikes up, you know. I, that's it. Like I don't know, I don't know what happens, but I just be myself and tell a funny joke and I'll wear off to the races. But I don't walk in with a game plan. I'm not strategizing. I don't need to mentally cripple another human being

so that I can take the advantage of them. That seems like a lot of work. I can't believe. How can you keep it all straight too? Like as you're going into the far and you're like, what am I supposed to do again? Oh yeah. Say you're good.

You look good, but now you don't look good. Some of these online dating coaches go so far as to teach guys how to smile. And we watch some of these videos and they're like, okay, smile a little bit less, a little bit more, a little bit less. Okay, put your eyebrow down, put your eyebrow up, bob your head, tilt it left, tilt it right. They are literally teaching these guys how to be the robots of instruction when romance, in my opinion, and attraction, really nothing to do with robot of instruction.

No. It's just something that... It's not about an eye movement. Yeah. You have to be open to it. You have to go in believing that there is a woman out there, or a woman or man, we'll say it from both sides, because I'm sure there's a lot of women that feel the same way. Again, I'm just talking from my perspective. But you have to believe that there's someone out there who's going

to find your personality and your looks, you know, one or the other attractive enough to continue a conversation far enough to get into outside of the frenzon. And if you don't find that person, it's okay. If you don't find them in the next bar that you go to, it's okay. Are you good with yourself? Correct. That is. That is. My opinion.

Wow, holy. Look at you, Buddha on high over there. I think you're right about that. You have to be good with yourself. And by taking instruction from other dipshits on the internet, you are just essentially just drilling into your own head that your own compass is not good enough for you. I don't understand. It's maybe taking a class on how to socialize or going out with other guys who can teach you how to be, you know, out there in a social environment and talk to somebody, I can see some value in that.

But giving you a point-by-point instruction on how to pick up a woman, I don't even know that some of these men have ever dated, like some of these dating coaches. I don't even know that they've ever seen a woman in real life because the dating instruction that they give, you know, outside of like strippers, you know, live strippers.com. I'm not even sure. It's unbelievable to me. So I want to dig

in to one particular video I had thought about doing a collage of videos like we normally do a little collage of clips. But I found one gentleman. So disturbing. so incredibly insane that I had to just focus in on this one gentleman and there may be a part two to this video because I was only I can only play so many clips in an hour-long show. This guy has a video that's got 1.7 million views on it and it's called 20 dark pathological secrets to making a woman crazy about you. 20 manipulative tactics to get a woman to go crazy. This guy has a hard time with the English language. I'm just going to let you know that right now. I can't believe he has ever put his hands on that. Maybe while he's gotten some views on that,

that it's very enticing. I mean, it's like a woman with skin care, whether like here are 20 tricks to make your skin look beautiful. You are absolutely right. It's like here, click here. We're gonna tell you everything. We're gonna show you the secret. It's like the old, it's like the old

televanjalist thing, right? Uh-huh. I can heal you, only I can heal you. Send me $15. Did you know that I literally stopped coronavirus by yelling at it? Web them, Bing Bong Bing dong. Send me $5 and I can do the same for you.

For you. I'll tell you what to do. Yeah, so it's very similar, but I'm doing this more as a, I think it's a caution, I'm doing this as a cautionary, public service. I like to think of myself as a fucking public service. Just a guy out there trying to help people from... Hit in the streets. Yeah, because I'm pretty sure that some of these tactics are going to get you either jailed or restraining order, but I'm not particularly sure they're

going to get you laid. So, with that said, I got to get into this. Now, let's meet our dating coach extraordinaire. I'm going gonna call him Don Juan Ding Dong, because I have no fucking clue what his name is. He never says it on the video. And I didn't want to take the time to figure it out to be on this with you. Here are trusty captain shares secrets. Pass down from Bachelor to Bachelor. He's like a shepherd of the lost scrolls of the virginity, right?

1.5 million views on this. I'm pretty sure that at least half of those are law enforcement officers. Collecting evidence against this guy, but that's it. This guy is teaching a generation of young gentlemen, a little gentleman, how to insult, attack and victimize women. And I think it's absolutely fucking insane. Let's meet him 20 dark secrets. Let's meet him, 20 dark secrets. Let's go.

To mentally fuck with women and keep them around. This is basically what he's saying, right? Let's get into it. So 20th dark psychological tactics that you guys can use to make any woman fun love with you. These tactics are more specifically for people who are in relationships and you feel like the relationship is not going well.

For girls who are just friends with benefits, if you consistently keep getting girls but losing them the next day, you notice how some guys just know how to get girls but they know how to keep them. If you keep losing girls, if girls are not as interested in you but not as interested, these tactics are made to make them fun and love. Okay, so we start off with a strong clip here, right? He's trying to get you enticed into his video and he says, first of all, this guy's language is lost on this motherfucker, right?

I cannot believe. Some kind of hybrid. Well, I mean, I'm talking about his accent. I'm talking about like he just can't even speak in full sentences. I know it's a hybrid of non-grammar and grammar. The kids were raising these days. Young GZ Yo in a house. Yeah. of non-grammar and grammar. The kids were raising these days. Young GZ yo in the house.

Yeah, so he says, if you keep getting girls and then you keep losing them, you know how some days you pick up girls and then the other days you lose them, they just now attracted to you. If you keep on picking up girls and losing them the next day, you're probably a fucking jackass, right? That's probably the reason. That's probably the reason.

You're doing it wrong. That's right, you're doing it wrong. First, second, learning how to manipulate someone, That's probably the reason. That's probably the reason. You're doing it wrong. That's right, you're doing it wrong. First, second, learning how to manipulate someone, someone's mind for your benefit is called being a fucking psycho, pure and simple. There's nothing, there's no other way about it. Playing games, manipulating situations,

trying to bounce on insecurities of a few potential partner, I'm telling you right now, may work in the extraordinarily short term unless that person is mentally deficient, right? Eat. Yeah. But it's not going to work for a relationship long term. You're not going to get what you want out of it.

You're going to be disappointed time and time again. So just a warning that none of these tactics, I think, are working. No. Okay. But before we start, before we dig in to the 20 secrets, our debonair dipshit has a warning for everybody. I do warn you that making girls fun and love is not as fun as it looks. When you use these taxes correctly, you're going to have girls who want to be around you.

And if you never had that before, it could be a very weird experience because you're going to notice that it gets old after a while. It's not as fun as it looks. Having girls being near you around you and wanting to see you is not as fun as it looks. Okay. So just giving your warning, getting girls to fun and love with you, amazing, amazing pretty. But once you have a girl who's obsessed with you, it's not going to be as pretty as it looks. I'm just letting you guys know so you guys want this This is the video right cuz these are 20 dark shit 20 dark shit. Yeah more more of a mastery of the English language

Listen this is the hook right here. He's like the guy on TV spit spread selling the spray on hair solution Right, but we must board you women will never be able to tell your hair is brunette silly string and a can. Hey, baby. That silly string in your hair. No. I'm in a club for men. This fuck to odd right here is really working up a sale.

And the funny thing is, I don't see anything for sale here, maybe he's just trying to get views. But my thought of someone watching this on the other end, the comments too, like the good news is there's put more down comments than there are, you know, more down thumbs than there are up thumbs or whatever. It's encouraging, but some of the comments are like one of the comments some comments said Do you know a Bale's bondsman When comments said minute number wind this guy's a fucking jackass minute number seven. He's a genius

This guy's a fucking jackass, minute number seven. He's a genius. It's like, no dude, no back away. And by the way, why would having pussy at every turn be a problem? Is that a problem? Isn't that the point? This guy is sneaky. He's already using his mental mind tricks on us.

Be careful. These are not the droids you're looking for. This is your mind. Okay, so let's get right into it. I'm curious to see how this guy can help us trick women in the sleeping with me. I'm curious too. I'm curious as well. So let's get started.

The first step is this. You gotta choose the right victim. You have to choose the right woman, right? I got to stray from the artist's deduction. You can't choose a woman who's happy with her life. You can't choose a woman who's happy with her life. You can't choose a woman who has high self-esteem. You can't choose a woman who feels comforting by her life because there has to be a need.

There has to be a need that hasn't been met in her life. Because if there's not a need in that woman, you can't fulfill that. In order to make a woman really fun and lovely and become obsessed with you. You have to find where she's vulnerable And become that source of validation for that vulnerability. Oh my god First of all this sounds a little bit familiar to me. I've been doing this I was doing this for years and I didn't even know sounds a little bit familiar to me. I've been doing this, I was doing this for years and I didn't even know

No, I wasn't looking I was looking for women with less office time. I just happened to get This guy is a fucking lunatic Great He's talking about a victim First of all first up don't call the woman that you want to make probably love with you a victim We should start our own 20 First up, don't call the woman that you want to make. Probably love it, you would victim. We should start our own 20, 20 not dark secrets. God, I know. He called you got to pick the right victim.

You got to have someone with low self esteem so that you can fill that void. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, that's exactly the opposite of what you want. Whoa. If you pick a lone woman with low self esteem, let me tell you something. There is nothing but trouble ahead.

And if you're trying to fill that, well, everybody has some self-esteem problems, right? I'm sure. I'm confident in every angle of my life either. But the reality is, is that if you're looking to fill that void, you will never fill that void. No. Therefore, she will become resentful and she will say goodbye. This is like the worst kind of advice

that you could give a guy looking for a relationship. But what happens when you finally do hypnotize a woman into paying attention to you? Let's listen to what Don Juan Dipschit has to say. The second one, send mixed signals. Make a feel as though she has you. Like make a feel as though she has you and then take it away, all right? To make a woman fall though she has you like make her feel as though she has you and then take it away

All right to make a woman fun. I love with you It's best to make her feel the loss of losing you now or cooking with gas So this is all making sense to me now the way to keep a woman is To make sure that you lose a woman that way you can keep the woman give her plenty of mixed signals So when you finally get that woman you've been looking for you make sure you play enough head games that she leaves you Am I right am I following you? Yeah, but if she has loads of steam She has loads of steam and that's where

That's the key so if she already has loads of steam on top of that I want you to give her plenty of mixed signals so she jumps off a bridge Exactly. Yeah, she's gonna go into a mental institution Look how many would have women have put the middle institution I've got 32 greatest straining orders currently against me. I mean, this guy's giving advice you can take to the vagina bank. Look at this.

But Brian, we're only on step two. This is why we can't get to the whole thing in one video. We're gonna have to come back to this next month But Brian, what if I don't look the part? Don't worry our sex-dubbed doctor Phil has you covered Number number three have contrasting qualities Don't just if you're if you're for example, I'm a nice person right having very nice person kind of look a little good boy like a young boy So if you look like a if you have the appearance of a, of a nice young boy, you want to have an air of evil, an air of sexuality to you in order to give you that contrast. If you're a very masculine

person, you want to have an air of femininity. Oh, okay. It's all, it's kind of making sense to me. If you have the appearance of a young boy, you should let your inner Ted Bundy fly. And also, if you're a child, look sexy. Is that right? Is he targeting children? Here? He looks like a child. Honestly, in the video, he looks like he's no more

than 18, 19 years old. And then he says, if you're a man, if you're a mainly man, you gotta, you gotta fend it up a little bit, put on some high heels then he says, if you're a man, if you're a mainly man, you gotta, you gotta fend it up a little bit, put on some high heels and a mini hit streets. That only works for Prince, going back to the... Ah, that's it. I look nothing like Prince and I can't play the guitar.

This guy is honestly sort of fucking viable. Oh my God, Brian, where did you fight this guy? Honey, it's 1.7 million views. It's not hard to find. And if you start down this rabble tall, if you put online dating coach into YouTube, which I advise nobody to do because you're not getting any kind of advice. It's worthwhile. There are. This is going to YouTube for online dating advice. Yeah, that's correct. Call your mother. She's probably the best person to tell you how to get a get a girl

Listen, if you're not as attractive as Brad Pitt, we get it either am I I'm not attractive, right? If you've got some shortcomings in the personality department join the club everyone does be yourself Go to a bar have a beer if doesn't work on a Friday night go on Saturday and then again on Sunday And you know what you see a nice young lady Yo social distancing of course right now. Okay, so right now is a bad time to have low self-esteem and be single. I get it, all right. Maybe my videos just ill timed all together.

That's the wrong time to be doing this podcast. It's just. Okay, so now that I've sent my mixed signals, I'm a boy looking like a sexy boy. Yes. And I've gotten into it ahead. You've chosen a victim. That's right. I've got my victim.

I've given her mixed signals. Except to choose mixed signals. Choose mixed signals. Step three, make sure you have contrasting qualities, right? Make sure you have dual personalities. Pick the to look the parts. Put on some nice jeans. Take the corn t-shirt off. That's right. Take the corn t-shirt off. Have a shower. Pop the collar. Pop the collar. Put on some deodorant. It's not hard. There's no there's no rocket science to this. Okay, but now that I've done all these things

I want to let her know about my softer spiritual side. You know the side of me where the morals live that tells me I should never ever dream woman like this But let's see how this guy handles telling a woman about your softer more spiritual side I see you and don't be obvious about your spiritual side be subtle Communicate it in a subtle way. Don't just tell the humidity let her find out by her own Don't even say you meditate if you're met very very masculine person also you meditate allow her to see that you meditate through your Instagram Wait Let her find out you

This is the best line in any video I've ever seen. You know where I go to be subtle Instagram I mean this guy is just as bad as the televangelist. He's literally talking out of his butt cheeks What in the chicken and fucking gravy is this guy talking He said if you wanted if you wanted to figure out that you, if that's a humiditate, then you don't want it to know you meditate. Let her know. Find out that you're still spaking that you meditators. What I gathered from that is spake it. You know those airplanes, you know the airplanes you can hire with the signs behind.

I meditate. I just had to fly around her house a couple times Tell her see you doing it Show her all in Oh my Fly fly over How do I make sure that my lady knows she's these are gold these are gold. You can take these to the pussy bank. I just take them to the pussy bank.

It's just you are going to be you are going to be dripping with clitoris when this is all said and done or rehab bills or mental institution or the loony board of Northside hospital. I'm not sure which one. Okay. So how do I make sure that my lady knows she's not the only fish in the pond and I can get plenty of other women. Well, of course, talk about other women. Number four, create a triangle of desire.

Talk about other females you actually admire. For example, if she's a blonde who has a nice ass, talk about other females that you find attractive that have dark hair and nice titties and dark skin. Or talk about, it doesn't matter, but the point is that it has to be the total opposite of how she looks. Talk about another woman that looks the total opposite of how she looks so that she can become her own competition.

Oh! I don't call this the triangle of desire. Oh I don't call this the triangle of desire. I call this the triangle of no second date accepted It's all making sense now to a few guys that I dated along the way I think they watched the story. Oh, did any of this resonate with you as a woman? Like does any of this work on you? No If you dated a guy that you really liked and then he started talking about like how he likes bonds, triangle of desire. Triangle of desire.

Did he patent that thing? Did he? Listen, I don't think, I think this guy looks like he's recording it as mom's bedroom. I don't think this guy has a patent attorney on staff, but I'll check. He said, make her her own competition. This guy has never seen a real woman outside of a live stream or porn hub. How are you supposed to create trust and a safe space if all you do is create mistrust and jealousy? This is such poor shit. It might work on dull-minded human beings.

Also, the woman, my elves, and dire hair blonde the next day. Yeah, I mean, create her own competition. You said you like blondes, I'm a blonde now. I'm competing against myself. I'm competing against myself. Who's winning? Yeah.

This is me yesterday on Instagram and today. This is me today with blonde hair. And also I saw you meditating on Instagram. I think the only girls you're gonna get watching these videos are the same girls that are watching Jerry Springer during their third breakfast. Yes. Yes. If you know what I mean, if you catch what I'm putting down. With a bottle of during their third breakfast. Yes. Yes. If you know what I mean, if you catch what I'm putting down.

With a bottle of shard nae. That's right. Okay. So what is our crackhead castanova? Crackhead castanova. Crackhead castanova is a total right thing. But wait, go back real quick. One real quick.

What was the triangle of desire? Triangle of desire. I'm totally copy right. And it's a competition between the woman and her own self. And that's right. Yeah. It's when you three, it's a triangle. It's three. It's three. It's just like one woman against a fake. That's correct. Well, it may be what he means is that you can create three personalities out of that

You talk about the blondes of brunettes and the redheads and now you have the triangle They're all competing against each other in the same brain I feel like I'm just watching a robot woman exert head Remember that gate remember that movie with Matthew Broadwick where he had to play chess against their checkers against himself Tic Tac Toe until the stop nuclear war war games that's why I feel like that's what happens when you set a woman up to be her own competition. I think so okay crackhead Casanova What's up next? Number five and flick the paint. Don't not be afraid to inflict pain.

Guys are afraid to be to inflict pain on a woman. Guys are afraid to actually offend them. Don't be afraid to do that. I'm not talking about doing it intentionally. I'm talking about when a natural arises, do not be afraid to offend them. Because if you know, if you inflict pain, it means you also inflict pleasure.

When you're not on her radar, when she doesn't like you, she becomes indifferent. She becomes, she thinks as you as you as a nobody else, right? Your compliments don't be shit and your insults on me shit But when you're able to inflict pain she's gonna back her rationalize that she likes you because by simply inflicting pain It means that you also can alleviate her pain and bring pressure. Okay. This is where you get arrested anybody listening This is where you get arrested. Anybody listening? This is where you get arrested. Yeah. Let's get right to it. This is like, battered woman one on one.

Yeah, this is like, guys, guys, guys. Any guys that are listening to this, don't do this. Nope, nope, nope, nope. Spain, Canada, all our listeners. Spain, Canada, Ireland, Tunisia, especially. Don't do this. This is the old caveman approach to women. Bang them over the head with the club,

drag them back to your mom's basement, to play some Xbox and listen to in your insults. So, I love you and make them watch you meditate. Yeah, this is crazy. You're gonna come off like a crazy person if you take this advice. Not to mention,

I think some of this is like actually dangerous. Yeah. Because you know, some people are not all that intelligent and they would take this advice and they would run with it to the end of the degree. Like when he says inflict pain and you gotta find the right victim,

I think there are some people out there that would actually believe that that means inflict physical pain and victim means victimize. Guys, this is like, honestly, all you have to do is go to Amber Cumbery and Fitch, and get a nice shirt, smell good, go to a bar, be yourself. Eventually, maybe not today, but eventually,

you'll find someone who likes you for who you are. All of this manipulative bullshit is dangerous, and you're never gonna get what you want out of it. You cannot create a relationship like this. All you're gonna do is create a game that you cannot win because any smart woman, any woman you'd actually wanna be with will see right through this bullshit immediately. She will think it's dangerous, she will think your dangerous.

Show call to police. Show call to police. That's correct. I would call the police. If my daughter came home with a guy that was taking this kind of advice, I swear on all this holy, he'd be gone in 2.2 seconds. And this is what scares me, he's like,

I'm gonna have a fucking daughter. And then there's guys like this, getting 1.7 million views. And we're only on the top of the Spanish Apple Podcasts chart. There you go. Yeah. No, this is scary. It's seriously scary.

He really is. It was funny in the beginning, but now let's get turned into the dogs turn. Yeah, these last two are a little particularly scary, but we're back to more like psycho, you know, pseudo-psychological bullshit. Yeah, this guy is clearly, guys, is no psychologist or psychiatrist.

I don't know if you've noticed it but he's not giving you sound device. We don't even know his name. That's right. What happens when a woman that you're dating doesn't have the boobs you like? Well here our dip shit trusty captain tells us more. Perfect. All right talk about something that you know that she cannot meet during it, during the conversation and just say it, but then quickly change the topic. For example, if she is not that, if she has big tips, but doesn't have a nice ass, say, damn, I love girls with nice hips, and then change the topic. Don't even let her elaborate on the topic.

Why? Because by insinuating that you love girls who have big, large hips, right? And she knows that she doesn't have them. By changing the topic, you are just putting it as a seat in her subconscious mind. So that the next time that she thinks of it, randomly in a shower, she's gonna stay holy shit. Like, she's gonna feel that insecurity. Whoa. So let me get this straight. You need to pound into some woman's head, her insecurities, in order to make her attractive to you. Yeah. This is like, this guy's fucking disturbing. To me, I don't know.

He is fucking disturbing. He is fucking disturbing. And I want to meet the woman who's ever dated this guy while he's been giving me advice. Because she does some things to say. Here's a little piece of advice. If she can talk, because she's probably in a mental institution. Treat a woman like a human being with respect and the honor that they deserve, period and

of sentence. You don't bounce on anybody's insecurities. Those are games that children play. It's not games adults play that want to be in relationships. So if a woman doesn't like her hips or doesn't like her boobs or doesn't like her hair, instead of commenting on that, so she reminds her in the shower when she's thinking of you, why don't you compliment her on something that you like about her? That's a game that you can win, right? Because you're being honest.

Absolutely. I think being truthful without being hurtful. This makes me think that I, Brian, I think you and I need to come out with a... A course on an anti-course. You know what? You know what, how would they? I actually like what you're putting down here. Yeah. And I think that I would be happy to put together a video that rebuts all 20 of these

because we're just getting six of them here. There's 20 of them. They're not all is disturbing. I must say that there are some that I think make common psychological sense, like make sure you compliment your woman, give her a gift on random occasion, stuff like that.

Then rip it away. And then rip it away. Take it all down. Tell her what an so she is. You're ugly with small tits and I hate you. Jeez. I think we, as a public service announcement, Brian Green, I think you and I need to come out

with dating tips that actually do work. You're happily married. I'm happily married. We got married later in our lives, you know, after we played the field for a while, and dated, and did different things. I honestly think that maybe we should, this should be something.

Okay, done. You and I will work on this, a special episode. Chrissy and Brian's, yeah, Holi and Brian's, 20, not dark psychological tips. Yes. To get into a relationship that you want. Yes. And we'll show you that it's not hard to be a relationship expert online and it's also

not hard to be a fucking decent human being. Yes. It's fucking shithead with his theme. Oh my God. Jerry curl and cheat mustache. Oh, badly for the girls that are. They're not too good. Chrissy, no one's dating him.

Just be like, I mean, I'm just gonna too Chrissy no one's dating him just be like I mean Just to be honest no one's dating this guy the only set of tips this guy's ever touched is his mom And she was feeding him that's it period and to send the only vagina He's ever been in is the one he came out of That's the truth. Let's just be real about this This guy is so far off in planet nine But he found some idiots out there who also who think that he for some reason has some magic key to them getting laid and

so they watch his videos. Hard to believe, but they do, but you know, not everybody is not everybody thinks like we do, right? So this is a public service announcement to those who may get caught in this trap. And listen, not as everybody is as insidious and transparent as this guy. A lot of people put a real slick talk together, and they're dressed nicely, and they talk a good game, and they put it together a PowerPoint presentation. But basically, it's the same fucking advice. It's just not said like this. You're exactly right. I think we need to do a bonus episode. Bonus episode coming, consider it done. Probably be in June.

We need to take some time to do that. But coming in June, Brian and Vodely's 20 not dark psychological tips to get the relationship that you want. Click here now. Crack it, Casanova. Go now. Click on our website right now.

One more. I only have one more and I think Click on our website right now. One more. I only have one more and I think this is funny. I can take much more. Okay, that's why we have one more. I knew your reaction was going to be similar and that's why I didn't want to go much deeper into this. I felt like six or seven was enough because, like I said, not all of them are serving

but some of them are just serving. It's enough. Okay, let's see what happens. once you get that girl in bed, how you keep her in bed. And, and no girl has ever had sex with you or smoke with you. And you do that. You're going to remember her because you're, you're engaged in your, your passion with sense.

They say you play basketball and you play basketball and you play one one with your girl, right? And she fucking touch you, touch you, touch you dick while you play basketball. She does anything sexual, like touch you, they teaching you play one-on-one with your girl, right? And she fucking touches you, touches you dick, while you play basketball. She does anything sexual, like touching her date, teaching you and all that shit. While people are around, you're mixing up what you really love with sex and it causes that connection. For example, let's say that she plays a guitar. Find a way to combine guitar with sex. Or let's say that she loves to read.

Find a way to combine reading with sex, for example, I'll eat you out and see if you can focus on the book while I eat you out stop like that Hold this golf ball in between your teeth Let me play basketball and then touch my penis now Yeah, he's like he's like if you ever had a woman touch your penis when you're playing basketball. No shit head I have not There's basketball Anytime I get kicked in the balls, that does not remind me of sex with someone you fucked. This is so weird. I'm trying to have sex with Astrid over podcasting, but I just

can't cut out the moaning. Now we'll just catch her while she's reading a book. And then see if you can eat her out while she's reading the book. Yeah, that's it. Put all your habits. You like those little model trains? Just build a little track right into a vagina. Oh my god. Oh my god. So Ryan, you never seen through an amazing way by finding the deepest, darkest places of the web.

I'm here to reveal some of this ugly shit so that we can shed light on it because you know what? It's not dark if you shed the light on it. What is it? What is the old saying? Maybe I'm saying it wrong. I think that's right. Shed the light into the dark or said the dark into the light.

My point is is that you bring these people out in the open and they don't have as much power. You know what I'm saying? Because now this dipshit is, I mean, anybody who listens to podcasts is going to know that this guy is a dipshit. They're not going to fall for his, you know, slickly produced video with him in his mom's bedroom. I like to. I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it.

I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it.

I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it.

I like it. I like it. I like the nuts, I think of sexy D baby. Read that book. My hobby is bungee jumping. I'm gonna bungee jump on these tits. I need to give them out. Oh. Listen, we're gonna do a follow-up video to this. First of all, I want to follow this fucker and find out, find more videos.

I only had a chance to watch two of them and this was by far the most disturbing, but he has a whole channel out there. So I'm gonna keep everybody at prize. I'm also gonna find other online dating coaches. And we obviously will do this down the road, right? But I want to give you an example of what a slick-dupped production of this, someone who's not using such crass language and not being so obvious, but they're basically saying the same thing, because those are the guys you really got to watch out for.

The guys with slick language, for good sales people, right? They're selling the same line of bullshit. I love you, Holy. I love you, Brian. We're going to get through this. Yes, I'm going to do... I'm falling backwards right now. I love you, Brian. We're gonna get through this. Yes. I'm gonna do... I'm falling backwards right now. Catch me, catch me.

Caught on the internet! DCBpodcast.com is where you go to find all the episodes. We're available on Spotify, Google, Stitcher, Apple, and some other places. Overcast.com and some other places that you might want to go. Listen to the podcast. And we appreciate every single listen. Woo! Yes we do, we love you, we love our audience. Until next time.

The Commercial Break, hosted by Brian Green, is an irreverent look at the world around us and those who inhabit it. The commercial break is now available on all major podcast platforms including Apple, Spotify, Google, Stitcher, Overcast and others. Episodes drop every Wednesday. Visit TCBpodcast.com for more information. The commercial break, tune it in and write it out.