The Commercial Break - The Snorkel Cock Diaries

Episode Date: March 21, 2022

Bryan reminds Krissy about his brush with fame in the form of the band Rush. He is tortured , to this day, by one word repeated hundreds of times at that encounter. Then Bryan has the 2021 Pornhub Annual Report and he is here to tell the TCB universe just how twisted we all have become! Then Bryan has been digging around the internet looking for creature erotica. Monsters, Mermaids, Aliens and Dragons. They're all having sex with humans and we will find out how. LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us or leaving a voicemail at: 1.855.TCB.8383 Lululemon.com is for people who like comfort! Watch Us on YouTube Creator: Bryan Green Co-Host: Bryan Green Co-Host: Krissy Hoadley Written By: Bryan Green Exec Producers: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Content Production & Research: Tina Khano YouTube Producer & Editor: Morgan Please Audio Editing: Christina A. Executive Director: Astrid B. Associate Producer: Gustavo Episodic Contribution: Marianne, Diane, Natalie, Will The Champ, Will D** Huge Thanks To Our Supportive Listeners, Friends, Family & Spouses: Astrid & Jeff!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Uh, turn to page 5. Appendix 3 soft limits. With you. Find anal fisting. I'm all ears. Strike it out. Strike out vaginal fisting too. Be sure.

Yeah, genital clamps. Absolutely not. Consider them gone. Water butt locks. that they not? Consider them gone. What are buttless? On this episode of The Commercial Break. And he points to a section, and I read it, right? And he's like, oh, what, he went, wow. He's like, expression is like, oh, this guy knows how to,

and then he goes, well, can you,, you know, he's like, expression is like, oh, this guy knows how to, and then he goes, well, can you, do you know what it means? I totally made it up. Just based on the four words of Spanish that were in that paragraph, I came up with a whole story in my, I made an educated guess and it was right. And it was as if magic had happened to right there

in the living room. That's what you was like. What's really fell in love with you? Which magic craft? Break out Uncle Brian for two seconds and explain that if you're having a fantasy about fucking I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which-

I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which-

I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, which- I was like, because you're then your married. Yeah. Essentially, you're probably then your married. Soon it was clear Luke could emit oxygen from his penis and she sucked on it like a snorkel. Oh. Ha. Ha. Luke had become everything he'd wanted to be. A snorkelcock.

Ha. Ha. A snorkel. Ha. Ha. Ha. The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Hey! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Dear dear friend, Chrissy how the hell are you? Hello Brian! Best of you! Best of you! Best of you out there in the podcast universe thanks for joining us on yet another episode of this The Commercial Break! Yes!

Chrissy! Yes! I have it! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha to you one two, yes, yes, Simulence. That went on for four hours. It's telling the story, I don't know, 600 episodes ago. I'm from a lot of our deep we are into this fucking podcast. I had an opportunity to go to a rush show like Backstage because we shared a road manager, me and the ever popular band. This is your 33-beat. Chopper Johnson.

I chopper Johnson. No, there's a more mature band. We're all well on our way. Mr. Johnson, Mr. Johnson, if you're nasty. Mr. No, there's a more mature band We're well on our way Mr. Johnson if you're nasty Mr. Johnson if you're nasty. Yes, we were well on our way to fame like incubus was well on their way to Famous to know Well, I think we would have been like an incubus type band where we would have had one really big hit Yeah, and I would have sung my heart out on that one big hit and then they would ever want to be like that band kind of sucked

Or like creed And so when I went to the rush concert we were there many hours early because you know That was kind of relationship that one of the guys in the band had with the road manager for Rush and so we were there while they were doing pre and then post sound check and there was one guy who just went to every single fucking microphone and did this for at 15 to 20 minutes on every one of them and it drove me up a wall, he would go

Simulence Simulence Simulence Check, thatence. Simulence. That was his check. What the fuck is that guy doing? Is this routine? Yeah, I think he was checking for echo or something. Like, who fucking knows?

With Rush, every little detail has to be paid attention to. Because, you know, Rush fans are a different breed. They're a different kind. We are. It's the stuff. It's like, Rush, and, do you like Rush? Yeah. Are you into Rush? Are you like a Rush head? No. No, you you're into rush. Yeah, you like a rush head. No, no

You're not like you don't like to do like mathematical equations on Our dear friend Allison is a huge rush huge rush fan Yeah, I told her what that I had met the guys in the band on an uppercase you freaked out Yeah, oh my god. How were they and I'm like human? I guess I don't know I'm not the world's biggest rush fan. I like some of their music, but I knew a couple real rush heads at the time when this was going on, and they were absolutely freaking, they were like coming on themselves,

that they knew a guy who was close to a guy, who knew a guy, who one time met Rush. But those guys, they would do like, you know, I don't know, Adriatic equations with their, you know, with the music. Yeah, they were super smart. You've ever noticed this is in 726 time, and I'm like, no, no, I didn't.

I didn't dig that deep. But they were geniuses. One guy was learning his ninth language or something like that. One of the guys, Getty Lee, I think was learning his like his ninth language. They did. I can't even learn my second.

I can't even learn my first. I've downloaded a babble couple of times. I'm going to see. For different languages too, I'm like learn my second. I can't even have my first. I'm downloadin' Babel couple of times. I'm doing two. For different languages too. I'm like, well, I really wanted to learn Italian, but let's try French. Yeah, go for French. Let's learn a little bit of Italian, a little bit of French. I started watching a show that was in French.

So I thought I could pick up some stuff. Yeah, I got in this. I was wholly hell-bent to learn very fluent Spanish when I met Astrid. Of course. Because I'm gonna know how to talk to everybody. And listen, I do okay for myself. I hang on, but I took the Spanish like, oh la!

Yeah, oh la! My crutch word, port su puesto. I say that, and people are impressed, they're like, oh! I like Adios, Mia. Adios, Mia, if you wanna be real Spanish. Like, Adios, Mio. Instead of saying, you say, yeah, espagnolo.

Barcelona. Barcelona. And it's true, that's how they beat that. So one time we go up to Astrid's grandparents house, and they are in the, I can't remember the Catalan, the, the Codalon region. Okay. And so they speak Codalonia up there. I think it's how you say it, right? It's this weird hybrid of Spanish. Sure. A lot of that happens at the moment. Regionally, regional dialect, right? But if you can speak Codalonia or read Codalonia, you are considered like as Spanish as they come

right here. Only the old people know how to say it, but they have a couple newspapers that are in it. Okay. So we're at our grandparents house one time in north Spain, northern Spain. And our grandpa who speaks not a lick of fucking English is speaking to me in Spanish, even though his tongue is Catalonian, right? Okay. He was being nice. Yeah, he was reading the newspaper and Astrid says, oh, Brian see if you can read the catalog in the newspaper Right, and so I pick it up and he points to a section Mm-hmm, and I read it right and he's like, oh what you get wow, you know, he's like expression is like oh

This guy knows how to and then he goes, well, can you do you know what it means? I totally made it up just based on the four words of Spanish that were in that paragraph, I came up with a whole story in my, I made an educated guest and it was right. Oh. It was as if magic had happened to right there in the living room. That's when I was like,

which really fell in love with you? Which magic craft? And I know, Astrid was like, I'm really impressed that you knew. It's like listen, I just kinda, you know. I know. I've been practicing. I can play every instrument. I play every instrument that you knew. It's like, listen, I just kinda, you know, I know. I know. I've been practicing. I can play every instrument.

I can play every instrument. Saxophone. Yeah. Ben and bands. I'm a singer with two Grammys. That's the singer. That's watched the Grammys before. There's been at least, there's...

I'm a singer that's watched. Tens of people who have seen me sing across two different clubs in Tuscaloosa, Alabama. One of which watched me fall right off the stage. So anyway, this guy said similar and similar and similar for 20 minutes. So now our joke for on each microphone, which is like 12 microphones for rush, and that went on for hours. And then, you know, so Chrissy and I every once in a while say similar and say that out.

But what I was going to say long before we started on that time, I tried was I had the strangest, what had the strangest, what is the strangest sex dream you've ever had? Now I'm talking about like, you know, I'm not talking about, you know, strange, like completely out there. I'm not talking about, you know, so I have sex with my neighbor,

you know, making out with my uncle or something like that. I don't know, I should have written it down though because I can never remember my dreams. Okay, I'll tell you, you have to come back to me on that. Okay. Because I'm interested to hear. But the strangest sex dream I can never remember my dreams. Okay, I'll tell you, you have to come back to me on that one. Okay. Because I'm interested to hear. But the strangest sex dream I can ever remember having is by far.

You know, sometimes you have a sex dream about somebody and then it sticks with you. Yes. And if you do that with a celebrity, then every time then you see the celebrity afterwards, you're like, oh, I remember. It feels like you actually had, one time I had this dream, wasn't too long ago,

maybe like four or five years ago, I had a dream that I was having sex with Alonus Morris at. Which Alonus Morris at at one point was just like the hottest thing I had ever seen. Absolutely. Gorgeous woman, right? And then she's like a Buddhist and you know, Eastern philosophy and all this.

I'm really, I basically, I basically changed my entire being just to fit Alonus Morris at man of small sets. Man profile best man. Unfortunately, I think I'm just a couple dollars short of full on this more anyway. I had the sex with sex dream with a lot of more set the first part of the dream is just really hot right I am full on. Just not your glory man's planning with my penis all the wonderful things that a man can be to Alonis And she's just in the throes of ecstasy and then she starts growing a beard in the middle of the dream Never I don't know I have a book of dreams will break out one day right down a couple of your string to dreams

And I'll get the book of dreams out and we'll go we'll really dig into a But this was like the most fucked up dream she had a beard But the crazy thing was I kept plugging her like she was like I don't know I just never it just kept going the sex dream kept going and be here kept getting on there. Yeah Whatever it's a mustache It's still on us more a set It was the strangest dream that I have ever had. But dreams are strange. Yeah, but listen, I am not, you know,

I'm not one of those guys who has like, in my awake life, has these crazy fantasies, you know, I don't have crazy fantasies about having sex with a woman with a beard or you know, some people are into some crazy, there's some strange, there's strange sexual predilections out there. Everything under the sun,

you can think it, they do it, you know. Fucking a TV, somebody likes to do that, you know. Getting your balls stepped on, someone likes to do that, you know. Drawing sexual cartoons about Mickey and Minnie Mouse, they do it, right? It's, it's, it's, wow.

If you can think about it, it is out there and they do it. It's not, it's been doing. So the timing was right then when I saw that, uh, PornHub had put out there a 2021 year in review. Oh, well. Thanks to our good friend Tina Kano for sending this over to me, but I thought we'd go through a couple of these if you're interested. Yes.

Well, you're interested. Of course you are. Of course. All right, so here we go. The search is defined. Okay. So. These are the searches, the top searches. Yeah, there's a couple different categories. We'll go through. Okay. All right. We'll find out just how fucked up this world is. The 2021 searches, the number one 2020. We want to go 10 to one or you want to go one to 10. I think we should count 10 to one. 10 to one. How to was the number 10?

How to. How to. How to squirt. How to eat pussy. How to suck dick. How to put on a condom. How to last longer. How to finger myself.

Shave my balls. Make a dildo. Find a G spot. G spot and how to make her come. So these were things that you can't search for on YouTube. No, it's like you got it. You can, but you're not going to find much information. Right.

But if you go to PornHub, all you're going to see is inflated, you know, completely exaggerated versions of what really goes on. I guess. Like if you're looking to PornHub for how to make her come, you're going to see some dude ramshack in some girl at 600 miles per hour for two and a half hours. That doesn't happen like that. Right. It just like going like, you know, rubbing our, rubbing our glitour is so hard and so fat.

Doesn't work like that, guys. Doesn't go like that. They don't have instructional videos. At least not in my, in my love. I think Dr. Sen would be featured on one of these. I think Dr. Sen would give a how to course. I'm not sure she would do it on ParnHub. No. We should ask her. But sure she would do it on parnaf. No. We should ask her. But guys, here's a little piece of advice. Don't go to parnaf for your piece of advice. Yeah, I think don't see that.

But you're setting yourself up for failure. Or I don't know in all of my lovemaking experience, which granted is limited mainly because of the amount of time I can spend lovemaking at one moment or another. I don't know. I just haven't met too many women who are into the things that you see normally on porn. Gaping anuses, hardcore jackhammering, one leg up on the extreme. They do this because I don't know, because I think there's like a,

I think there's like an attraction to the extreme versus sex sex. Well, I was gonna say it's not, it's not in normal everyday life. No. That's right, it's not, because if you did normal everyday life sex, right, it would be totally boring. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well, that was the last night. Gravittic, Humph once. Woo, it turned on. Go check on the kids. Yeah, you wouldn't need more. You wouldn't know. You wouldn't need more at all. Number nine, roommates.

Oh, roommates. You are some fucking gross mother fuckers out there. You ever had a roommate you wanted to have sex with? No. No, I have. I have, but it didn't work out. Searches for roommate grew by 136%, including lesbian roommate, gay roommate, fucking my roommate, straight roommate.

Probably because everybody was inside in their room. Oh, you know, I never thought about that. That's a really smart idea. Yeah, you get a fantasy about the people that are in your house at that point. I mean, it break out Uncle Brian for two seconds and explain that if you're having a fantasy about fucking your roommate, but that leave that fantasy exactly where it is. Right. In your head.

Fucking a roommate almost never works out. It almost never works out. Why? Because then you're married, essentially. Essentially. I mean, then you're married. It doesn't work. I ain't living in the same place.

You live in the same place if you want. If you fuck your room, let's say you're a guy. You're a straight guy and you have a straight girl that, you know, I don't know, some French model that shows up, you know. I'm here to check, I'm here to get the butt of the roommate. I'm a French model. That's the French accent. Vadevoo Vadevoo.

Now the closest I got to that was my neighbor. Well, you did fuck. Which was Jeff. Yeah, but you guys still had your separate apartment. We did. That's right. Well, you then you married and now you're roommates. I got it.

We were reversed of the four-nems, sir. Yeah. I had a roommate that I had sex with once. We lived together for a long period of time. And at first we had sex and then we decided we were going to be friends. And then every time that I brought home a girl, shit got weird. Right. Shit got uncomfortably strange. Right? And like, it's hard to hide that stuff from your

roommate and you knew that there were feelings there. And every time I brought a girl home, it was uncomfortable for me, for the girl I brought home for the roommate. So me and the roommate ended up fucking again at the end of the day. But I was gonna say to everybody the only time that's okay is right before you're moving out. Yeah, that's what we did. We started fucking again and then we decided

we don't wanna live together. And now we don't talk to each other anymore. Number eight is Goth. Number eight's Goth. Goth porn? Yeah, sure, why not guys? Yeah, like that Edward team Edward team Jacob. Yeah, it's that look that dark circles

under your eyes kind of like. Black hair, black gloves. I like the look of a like a hot goth girl. Yeah, sure. Something about it is mysterious. Mysterious, yeah, and kind of taboo. Kind of taboo, you know she's crazy, probably. Kind of girls gonna give you all kind of troubles.

You know you're gonna be the first one to say I love you in the relationship and she's never gonna say it back. Right, she's gonna take your keys and lock you out of the house, shit like that. Police will be called eventually. Probably. And you like that, so.

I do. That was in your former life. That was my thing. It was a thing for a while there. I got locked out of hotel rooms. I got my car keys taken multiple occasions. I got locked out of my own house. And when I said that,

hey, I have to get into the house. I have stuff in there that I need, absolutely need right now. Like my cell phone and my keys to my car, they ended up going out the balcony window. Oh, she just threw them out the balcony window. You've been close to the door. That girl was fun. That was a lot of window. He didn't close the door. That girl was fun.

That was a lot of fun. She's doing well. Transgender, so searching, containing trans increased by 141%, and the views of transgender category grew by 23% making it the 10th most watched by male visitors. Oh yeah. There's some beautiful, beautiful transgender women. That girl in Euphoria, that woman in euphoria is

Smoke show if you watch you for yeah, I have not it's a little too close to the bone with having teenage But you gotta understand there's plenty that I've seen I mean just you would never know they're beautiful beautiful That there there is a show on HBA that I really like about dancing, ballroom dancing. Oh, with transgender people? Yeah, they're beautiful. You look at like jazz Jennings, I am jazz. You ever seen that show?

I am jazz, jazz Jennings. So after I've been watching this since for years, it's another TLC. Is LLC, of course, yeah. Of course, yeah. And jazz Jennings, I mean, she was a young kid when she started telling her parents she was a, she was a she. Right.

Right. And her parents took her seriously. And then she just got that surgery like four or five years ago, three or four or five years ago, watch that whole journey. But this euphoria, there is a woman on there, transgender woman, who plays, she's kind of the second main character in the whole. I mean, there's like four or five main characters, but don't worry about you, watch euphoria.

It's such a good fucking show. It's like one long music video with a lot of sex and drugs in it. Your teenage kids are not doing this. If you, I hear this complaint that you far, it tells the kids, you know, I have to be back. And, you know, oh my God, I can't believe my children. I don't have anybody, anything but for me. It's telling parents, parents are getting in their head

that fucking Euphoria high is like the rest of high school around the world. And it's not fucking true. First of all, I think probably less kids are drinking and drugging than ever because it's kind of fallen out of taboo a little bit. Now, the, my saying the drugs and drinking aren't happening? Of course not, of course it is.

Look, it's looking Panama City right now. It's like, it's Adam and Gomorrah. It's spring break. But what I am saying is, this is the extraordinary, extraordinarily exaggerated version of what happened to us in our high school. Well, I was gonna say, I knew some, you know, I started watching the first episode and some things that were happening. And I was like, Well, I was gonna say, I knew some, you know, I started watching the first episode

and some things that were happening. And I was like, ooh, I kind of remember, you know, that happening to some people that I knew, or that, you know, it was a little too much, but I'll go back to it. It go back to it. It reminds me of my high school years, not of the high school years today.

And it's made by a 40-something-year-old white man, right? Who just is essentially writing his own child that I wouldn't imagine what's going on. But it's so good. It's so good. Anyway, everybody loves it. The transgender woman that's in that show is a fucking smoke show.

Yeah. It's absolutely gorgeous. Challenge, challenge. Oh, busted. The jerk off challenge. Jerk off challenge guys. I want it on that. I've been, I could win that one. The jerk off challenge, jerk off challenge guys. I wanted on that. I bet I could win that one. The jerk off challenge.

You might want to join up. Oh, the try not to come challenge. I can do this all day long. Yeah, I've been trained by ancient wisdom masters on the fine art of tantric yoke. Yes. Yes, I'm like, I'm like, uh, stink, I can last in bed for 12 to 14 hours. Right, just staring.

It's an experience, it's a sacrament. I say, Astrid, I'm about to give you a sacrament. Yes, stink, you think stings on porno? Oh, oh. Showing his techniques. Yeah. He's like, oh, I'm going to get this secret out there. I don't want Trudy to leave me,

so I'm sticking with it. When you have these kind of secrets, this kind of knowledge, just keep it to yourself. Okay. Don't want anybody else to understand. I don't want to give this information to Jeff. I don't want him to give it to Jeff, because then all of a sudden, I know that it's a three-some, but you and Astrid and Jeff, and I just see Jeff, like, well, on a mountain of rose petals, like, long flowing water.

Misty mountains. With like a big, like, one of those big swimming clocks behind you. And it says, you know, 27 hours, 36 minutes, and 27 seconds. And Jeff's like, yeah, not even close, Brian. I'm not even close. Oh, my god. Hey Brian, it's me, Joe. Hey buddy, what's going on?

I'm wearing your fucking ass right in the hood, and I just want to let you know, not even close. I'm not even close. I'd love to listen to you cry, Brian. I'm getting you back for the TLC show. You mean T-C-B? TLC. And TLC.

And TLC. I'll call you next Friday and I'll begin with you. We might be done, Robin. Yeah. I might be close then. That's great. Swapping. Oh, man, I knew you guys were freaks. I knew you were freaks. Swapping. Swapping. Oh, man, I knew you guys were freaks.

I knew you were freaks. Swapping, swingers and swinging, cuckolding, cheating, swapping, wife swapping, girlfriend swapping. This is a thing. I don't understand this one. I really don't. There is not a ounce of my body, which wishes, and I'm not a particularly jealous guy.

Like I don't get upset if I start talking to guys or you know, like I just don't, it doesn't upset me. Yeah. Because I don't let her. But if I really think about it, there's not an ounce of me, not one inch of me. And I mean, you know what Jinjian I'm talking about, that is interested in cuckolding.

Not one. I don't get this trend. I don't know what's exciting about watching your girlfriend get plugged by a man that's clearly more sexually capable than you. People love it. People love it. Yeah, people love it. People love it.

And fucking Jeff, he's running around, given it's all the ladies. Is that watching? We're going to call him Captain Cuckold from now. fucking Jeff he's running around, given it's all the ladies. As I'm watching, we're gonna call him Captain Cuckold from now. Jeff, Captain Cuckold. Fitness, fitness. Fitness. Is that like a working out in a family? Yeah, yo-go running exercise and gym,

also 165% gains. Yeah, I can see that. There is a series of yoga videos that are on YouTube, and I'm not, you go figure it out on your own. I was going to do a topic about this. I was gonna put this on the commercial break. But the thing is that it is mostly visual, and there's not a lot of audio.

I see the stuff on Instagram where I'm like, what? That's not yoga. That's showing here. Right. That's showing here. Right. That's showing you. I mean, maybe in a starfish. Yeah.

Post-boss. Yeah. Fending over with your legs spread wide open. Yeah. And having the camera zoom in on, you know, your stretchy pant butthole. It's not yoga. That's not what it is. Yeah. There was a whole channel. It's clearly

Russian because it's written in Russian, but it's got millions and millions of views and it's like yoga and meditation for relaxation. It's like what it says on there. Are they really you in that way? Yeah, and all of that is, is busty women who are beautiful in the see-through stretchy tights, right? That the stretchier they get, the more see-through they get, and they bend over in sexualized positions, and they hold their breasts to real tights, or nipples popping out, and it's like a relaxation, I guess, after you come.

I guess. I mean, yeah, I got it. All right. I blame Lutulum and for all of this. Oh yeah. Yeah, Lutulum and has now made, I don't know, didn't we do hold on? We did a whole episode on fitness videos.

Remember the one woman that had the men? Oh yeah, that's true. That's true. That's true. That's what you were like. There you go. Don't hold out on me now, boys. Swing those hips.

You know you want it. Uh-huh. I'll beat it all up. Oh my God. That's right, but about fitness trends in the 80s. Yeah, I think it's since the 80s, at least. Yeah, okay. All right, but I'm blaming Lugulemon for,

I'm not blaming Lugulemon for anything. I'm sure the pants are very comfortable, but now everyone wears Louis the lemon pants, or yoga pants, or tights everywhere. Women just wear them up everywhere, I know. I know, they're so comfortable. Well, God bless you. You know what God bless you.

God bless you. I see nothing wrong with you. Plus, I might just go do a quick go-go session. Well, make sure you film it for YouTube. Okay, I'll have to. That'll get us to that. I'll make sure you film it for YouTube. Okay, I'll have Jeff. That'll get us to that video. I'll have Jeff film it for me. That'll get us to those 5,000 subscribers we want.

I just start doing yoga plans. I'm having a hard time getting, like we get like one subscriber a day on that fucking YouTube, but if we put Chrissy and yoga pants doing some yoga, I'm guarantee we're going to shoot up the shirt. All right, by Jeff, he's a director, you know, so I'm gonna produce her. Oh, you as a director, he's gonna be directing you. All right, now bend over.

Kick that left leg up on the table. I'm gonna slide under, I'm gonna put myself on a dolly and slide under you. Look at the lighting just right. That's right, but the light. Number three, group sex. Okay. Three sums, four sums, FFMs, MMFs, orgies.

They all went up by 70%. It's a big party. Yeah, I've seen some, I've seen some rather ruckus orgy videos. Yeah. And then I've seen some, like, you know, there's, I forget what the one was, I had to look and I probably shouldn't have,

but there was a girl who broke the world record for the most amount of sex in a five-hour pen time period. I think we're hearing that. It was like 170 men or something. She's amazing. And as a bunch of, I think she was, I think she was, if I'm not mistaken, she was of Asian descent.

But then all of it, but it had to be filmed in, I don't know, it's somewhere in the Eastern Europe, like Ukraine or Czechoslovakia or something. Right, they went on. So it was just a bunch of it, but it had to be filmed in, I don't know, it's somewhere in the Eastern Europe like Ukraine or you know, Czechoslovakia or something. Right, they were like, so it's just a bunch of guys and they're all clearly not porn stars. They all have the Brian body type. And you know, they're Brian Dictipe, like small and fat and you know, and they're all just sitting there, waiting their turn, like you know, yanking on their cocks trying to get it hard. But a lot of the guys don't even make it, they just bow out because they find that, you know, being in front of a bunch of other guys

with their dicks out isn't making me hard. And after I watched her get, you know, having sex with 37 different men ahead of me. But it was rather, it wasn't, I didn't find anything sexual about it. I thought it was more like a science experiment. Well, number three on the last year so other people are finding out Sick puppies out there. I'll tell you what if you can see my my search. It's like sex with woman

Nipple I'm into pictures. I don't like I don't like videos. I'm into pictures. Yeah, just give me a picture That's all I need give me a serious catalog. I'm into pictures. I don't like videos. I'm into pictures. You just give me a picture. That's all I need. Give me a serious catalog. I'm into it. Romance is number two. Romance. Romance. Guys are cute.

It gives me hope. You guys are cute. Yeah. All of this shitty fucking craziness. And then you say romance is number two. Yes. Sweet. Romantic, passionate, romance. All right then. All right then. Romantic, passionate, bro man's.

All right. Yeah. Romance, all this, all that. It's like soft, low making. Yeah, tender kisses. Yeah, I think everybody feels, they feel a little lonely. Yeah. And they said, yeah, I've seen the, you know,

40 man gang bang videos and double pain attrition. I think something a little, you know, deeper. A little, but not in that way. Not in that way. Right.th. I need something a little deeper. I mean, that's right. But not in that way. Not in that way. Right. Yeah, emotionally deeper. Yeah, emotionally deeper.

I want to see what real love. I want to know what love is. I want you to hold me. And I'm talking down there. I want to feel what love is. Let me tie it in Porn up. I want to know how to show me. It is the porn hub site would have the romance stuff but go good

good for you guys. Romantic is Romantic's out there. Instead of dot gov. We're eventually we're going to have dot porn up. That's what we're going to have. Like all of the government websites or we're just going to teach us through porn up. Yes. So I'm to file your taxes. Tax porn is here to help. That's what we're gonna have like all of the government websites or we're just gonna teach us through part up

So I'm to file your taxes Tax porn is here to help I got an itemized deduction I don't mind that doctor Number one search term search search category for 2021 on a row are we going second year in a row? Are we going second year in a row? Because we did this last year. Uh, no, this is not the, I didn't think this was on there. Okay, because it was the step brother or sister last year. Stascist or porn, that's right. In the United States, I think we didn't

even say this is worldwide. World wide, the number one search category. Ladies and gentlemen. Is Hentai Is Hentai. Hentai. Hentai. Japanese cartoon sex. Oh, well.

The kind of like weird, crazy, you know, dragon has sex with woman, you know, that kind of crazy porn, which is very animated. Yes. You know, that kind of crazy porn, where she's very animated. Yes. You know, usually schoolgirls of some form or fashion, you know, wearing no panties and some guy with a 45 inch cock comes up and she's like,

oh, oh, oh, you know, just squirting going on everywhere. It's very interesting. I've watched. It's very meta. It's very meta. We're in the metaverse now. I've watched a mentai porn. It's not for me.

I don't find it particularly arousing, but I can see how somebody might. Yeah. It's very, it's an exaggerated, obviously exaggerated form of sex when you're drawing it. You can do anything you want. Right, that's, yeah.

That's what the meta is about. Yeah, a bunch of sick puppies. And so you want to check out a couple of other categories. Here we go. Hold on one second. We're gonna look at some other. It's a long list. It's just 10. Oh, yeah, well, I got a hold. It's 96 pages.

The report report is 96 pages. I read through all of it. Yeah, I can you hand it to someone in a manila envelope. Here's the early report. I bet for no does. Bob, I got the new report for bob i got the new report uh... on the count i got a new report come on up and get it and it brings us a lean bring it on man we're gonna get for the door the door bob here's a new port of report

i want to do part of the porn on my desk by Monday. We're going to do our porn hub projections. Okay. So most searched in United States, right? This was for the world and I'll go through it quickly. Number 10 is black. It's see, we're getting together as a, you know, it's a diversified world. Number nine, massage. Number eight, anal. Number seven, it's a word diversified world. Number nine, massage, number eight, anal.

Number seven, moving down one spot is stepmom. Anime is number, well, I don't know if we're number six, but cream pie, big ass, BBC, big black cock. I think that's what that's for. Three, some Latina Latina Asian Ebony, Milf, lesbian and hen tie. So, you know, not too much. You like the run of the mill stuff?

That's right. And this is for, hold on one second. There's one that I really wanted to talk about here. This is for so many fucking days. Wait, is this the, is this the by state? Yeah, this is by state. No, here we are. But I'm on the back. It's gorgeous big. Chorges of course

Tennessee is interracial see. I mean all these states that are I don't believe that for one second Arizona is just strip. It's just strip. Yes, like landing strip or just strip. Yeah, it's just strip. Yes. Like landing strip or just strip. Just strip. Uh, so female visitors came and went 50 seconds faster, 14 seconds faster than men came. Visitors 18 to 24 were 61 seconds faster than older age groups, while 65 and over, over, decreased by over half a minute. The average visit to Pornham now stands at nine minutes and 55 seconds. Y'all a bunch of fast mother fuckers.

When you're watching it, I mean, it's, it's pretty fantastic. Yep. Favorite time to watch porn is 6 a.m. between midnight and 6 a.m. on Sunday. So there you go. All right. So tell me. God. That's what I think. That's that's Oklahoma. Yeah. Natural tits. Because you see a bunch of fake ones. Oh, we're the only man. It's just naked woman. That's your that's your kind of board. look on the back here.

Wait, look at the one. A divorce in Arkansas. They're divorced. Okay, for under the gay category, scissorsing trans, squirting amateur fortnight fortnight. Fuck is looking at fortnight porn. Jesus, weird ass Christ. Glory, whole cartoon, blowjob, Japanese, J-O-I. Don't even know what that means. I know, I saw that on the map too. You did?

What does that mean? I don't know either. POV, which is point of view, Gangbang, Big Tits, public, and BBW. Those are the gay search terms. People who identified as gay. So listen, here it is. We're still as fucked up as we were, but there's some hope in there.

There's a lot of diversity in our searches here by the end of the country. And romance, which makes me feel a little bit better about how the world's going. But one of the things that came out of this big long report here is that people are really into cartoon and fantasy type. Yeah, same like it. Right? And so I wanted to just for one second review a topic that I have been reading about that I cannot

understand for the life of me. Okay, there are people. So it sounds so serious. There are people. It's how they come about doing it. Hard hitting journalists today. About a dress congress. There are people here in United States. D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D Hello my fellow porn hubbians! Still longer called America, we sold the naming rights to porn. These United States of Bona! Hey TCB family, it's me and it's time for the commercial break inside of the commercial break.

Chrissy and I are looking for a couple of guys, a couple of girls, a couple of whatever's to come on air and play a dating game with us. If you're a swing and single or your partner allows you to do this type of thing, please let us know. 661-237-8296. That's 661, the word best, the number two, and the word y-o-yo. Let us know you're interested in playing our dating game and we'll reach out and set

it up www.tcbpodcast.coms where you go you can find out more about Chrissy and I all of the audio and all of the video of Every episode is right there at tcbpodcast.com a one-stop shop if you will You can also connect with us on our socials at the commercial break on Instagram where we create content You can't find anywhere else, and youtube.com slash the commercial break where we also create clips of the show every single day of the week and content you will not find anywhere else like tcb in the studio where we take a topic and we opine for 5 to 10 minutes and if there's anything that you probably want more of it's my voice please use our sponsors specialized URLs and codes.

If you're ever in the market for their products and services, it helps us out by letting our sponsors know we're doing our job. And thank you so much to all of you who have left a review on Apple and CasBox and Podbean, all the other podcast players. If you haven't had an opportunity to do so yet, if you could take one minute out of your day and leave us a rating and or a review on your favorite podcast player, that's the best way to help TCB get to new audiences. We'll be back after this commercial break. There are people who are many people who are into thinking about sex with creatures, not sex with animals.

Like the Loch Ness Monster. Like the Loch Ness Monster you're onto something now, right? Loch Ness Monster, aliens, you know all those fucking- That little head that popped up in the lake. Yeah, you're like- It's very erotic The lockness monster comes with a frog going just liberty flabby's all over my clitoris I can think about it right now I'm gonna sit here and wait for the lockness monster right inside me. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. head. They came up. No, I think I was too young to get it. Hurry about that. I was just fascinated. But it just came to mind. Yeah. When he said creatures.

Oh, there you go. Look where your head went. No fun intended. What about the whisper balls? What's the whisper balls? I've got a fuck you. Rrrr. Rrrr.

Rrrr. Hurry up this way, boys. I'm fucking this monster. I'm fucking a whisper wall. I wasn't he fucking the fence. Well, God, that's right. Well, gosh, you're not fucking a whisper wall. You're fucking a fence. That thing got me right in the ball. Oh my God. We got to do that show again. People are into fantasy about all kind of different creatures. Creators, monsters, dragons. Dragons, dragons is a big one.

And that is a big one. It's a powerful mermaid. I guess it's, you know, but mermaids I can almost understand. Besides having a flippy floppy vagina, like a scale of vagina, they are naked. They could turn into like Ariel. Yeah, or Ariola. Yeah.

I saw their Ariola. Yeah. I show their Ariolas. So I had to figure out if this is like, where do you find, because I'm reading all about. It's not on PornHub apparently, but what the fantasy one or the other. No, it's just hard to film a dragon having sex with a woman. Yeah.

I mean HBO didn't it? I mean, didn't someone have sex with a dragon? And then I don't think they had sex with the dragon. Game of Thrones? No, she birthed the dragon. Oh, she birthed the dragon. Did she have sex with the dragon? Or just with the other guy?

Didn't have her children. Oh, okay. That's a whole other guy I don't want. Yeah, I don't understand. I don't understand. Game of Thrones, I don't understand. I'm sorry, guys. I never got into it.

I never got into it. Oh my God, it's so good. I went to this party one time with a person I was dating, I say person like she's not human. I was this woman that I was dating one time. Creature, I was dating. I'll leave that one up to the audience. And we went to this house to go watch

Game of Thrones. The first season of Game of Thrones had come out on DVD. Yeah. And they were going to watch the first season, starting at seven o'clock at night, they were going to watch it all the way through. Yes. That's the kind of party this was. So you can imagine how drunk I had to get the suffer through even the smallest amount of this.

Because you don't go to a party to watch Game of Thrones. You watch Game of Thrones. That's what you do. Right on your own. And then go to a party separately. Game of Thrones. You watch Game of Thrones. That's what you do. Right on your own. And then go to a party separately. When I saw a true detective, I literally laid in my own bed by myself and watched it from beginning to end in one night.

Right? But these people wanted to get together. But okay, so we go there. I don't know anything about Game of Thrones. First season is just ended. I know nothing about this show. And we're at this party, literally 20, 25 people at this party. And they have made all this food, you know, the, I don't know the, what

I drink out of big goblins. Yeah, big goblins. Yeah. Correct. And people were all dressed up and they were, hi, sir. And you know, whatever the fuck they talk, I just could not get into it. I was already turned off from the moment I walked in there. I didn't like the whole attitude of the party. And so I don't think I ever gave game of thrones a chance. Yeah. Because I didn't like where I was when I was watching. Right.

So I watched the first episode. If you're not really into the fantasy sci-fi stuff. Not into it. Yeah, much rather watch, you know, I am jazz. Right. My 600 pound life. I think I could get into it, but I haven't got into it. Yeah, I mean, I didn't jump on the bandwagon right away,

but once I did and watched it, I think maybe I was sick. And so I was like, let me see what this is all about. And loved it, loved it, huh? Hooked, jumped, I've been, we were hooked. He was just too long, like the kid fell out of the tower, and I was like, what the, man, I don't care. I got no care. I'm just sad, but I didn't care. I was not invested in any of the tower and I was like what the fuck man I don't care I got I don't care I'm a sad but I didn't care I was not invested in any of the

characters but I also you know was constantly interrupted by sire would you like some more you know I don't know dragon balls made with pure bail of cream and I'm like dude get on my fucking face your bedroom and stairches? Go play out in the park whenever you guys do. And I'm making it funny if you'll harp, you'll harp. But I didn't want some guy dressed up serving me cheese platters calling.

Yeah, I didn't really, they dressed up. Dragon turd. Dragon turd. He was awful, he was awful. So guy at a store. The dressing up part's a little mud. Unless it's Halloween. And every time they said, you know, I don't know,

the dark is coming on the winter. You know, every time the winter was March, you know. Train going in! And I was like, God damn. You know, should people have anything better to do with your time? Did you fake a phone call? I didn't have to fake a phone call

because the woman that I was with at the time threw a fit about something and we ended up leaving. It was the one time I was appreciating. Right. Absolutely instability of my partner. It was the takes two to tango. I'm not blaming everything on her. But at this, we didn't make it through episode number like three, I think, and then she was all upset about something.

So thank you for leaving. But so I went to a place where they write erotic, where you can write your own erotica and put it up there for everybody to read, right? It's called the erotica light or light erotica or something like that. Okay. And so it's just, oh, that's all it is. It's like a Reddit, but for erotica and only erotica. With creatures. No, there's a section with creatures, but they have all kind of different stuff, right?

Just like Florenhoek has all different categories. They have all different categories, but there's a whole section dedicated to creatures, aliens, monsters, mermaids, all this different stuff. Okay. So I thought I'd take a minute if you want to and you want to, you know, me and Uncle Brian to read some of this material to you. Okay, here we go.

I'm not gonna read the whole thing. I'm gonna read the good parts. This is about a mermaid. Scrubbing the walls and getting them clean was so tedious. He was getting them, but he was getting them cleaned up. Cleaning, the thing that was taking far longer than he imagined. This was awfully written, by the way.

Yeah. I think there's like three year old. I think it was like, literally, it's your small school children reading this. So if it sounds weird, I'm not reading it weird. This is how it's written. As he realized, some of the walls were glass windows dun dun dun dun dun!

Getting fern, o' Jack fern! Like they were up there for show. He couldn't see what was on the other side but it made him more curious. Eww! Ariel screamed as Luke looked up, seeing the red-headed siren. Yes, he muttered, whipping the sweat off his face. It's literally whipping the sweat. Okay, I was about to say wiping. Nope, just whipping. Wipping the sweat off his face.

Yes, I see, okay. The siren smirked more. He gave her a wave and then she winked. Looking good down there. Work those muscles, take your shirt off and stay a while she snickered as she pulled off one of the shells, revealing a nipple.

Luke's face got deeply read, which meant red, but he found her argument persuasive. He found her argument persuasive. Was that an argument? I didn't hear it. He began taking his shirt off, tossing it toward the edge. But he ought to vote. I don't know, because I can't remember everything

that I read last night. I mean, I'm thinking she's in the ocean. He is, she's in the ocean and he's washing like one of the walls of the, not of the boat of like a, like a harbor. Yeah, one porthole, so to speak. What of the harbor? He's like washing a wall.

Why they have glass walls? I have no idea, but you know, it's fantasy porn. Oh, my strong fellow, maybe you should come by and visit more. We could use some eye candy to look at while we swim. It gets very lonely. Isn't that right? Pacifica? Another mermaid. Oh, yeah, we Isn't that right? Pacifica? Another

merman. Oh, yeah, we don't get as many customers. Keys made. It's clear on that, which isn't fair. I mean, showing off is nice, but it's been so long since we had a man to pleasure us. Said the other mermaid with a smirk. Well, I'll keep that in mind. Luke said he continued to clean the walls for over an hour. But it was still a gentleman. Well, I'll keep that in mind. Luke said he continued to clean the walls for over an hour. But it was still a legend when those were. Yeah, I just see like this Jason Momot type character scrubbing the glass walls of a harbor, whipping off the sweat.

Yeah, told just drag me, girl, turning all read. Luke continued cleaning the walls for over an hour. Eventually he got the job finished. He walked over, plugging the hole back before heading back to the ladder and climbing it. The three sirens were watching him a wistful smirk on Ariel's face. Well, there you go. It should be all clean. But seriously, you girls should try and keep this place a little more clean than it already

is. Oh, we'll have to remember that Pacifica said, Luke nodded. Turning the water on. Is this please clean? Is there they inside the, the, the, the, maybe he's inside like the, like a mermaid castle or something? I don't know. But, no, go on.

Causing, oh yeah, maybe he is. You're right, okay? Cause he turned the water on, causing the waterfall to turn on. He turned the water on, causing the waterfall to turn on. He turned the water on, causing the waterfall to turn on. It's great. A huge aquarium. Yeah, that's it. He's ways in the aquarium. Look at that. You're piecing it together. He began to watch the pool get filled with sparkling, clean water. It practically bounced toward the edge, pulling Ariel and tossing her shell,

Bikini off her breasts bouncing rather nicely Luke couldn't help but check them out as Pacifica and Angel did the same letting them land on his head Definitely written by a 13 year old boy Yeah, a light chuckle as they bounced and pulled him into the water. Luke chuckled while patting his hand, patting his hand. He imagined heading up the stairs to get a new shirt before leaving. Oh, I'm so excited now. Luke pretended to be a sea lion. He had it to save that stone stranger waiting in the middle of the ocean at the middle of the night with his crocks and a t-shirt on.

Come join us for a minute, pool boy. She said with a giggle, Luke bit his bottom lip. He was feeling overwhelming desire to jump in the pool and join them. Sure thing, let me just grab some swim trunks or something. Ha ha ha ha. Pacifica popped her head out. Oh, come on, no reason be shine. You're not a man.

The water's great, it's nice and warm. Don't worry about it, not like anything's going to shrink, she jokes. Luke couldn't help but blush at the thought of a shrinking dick. Ha ha ha ha! Alright then, he began stripping off everything and soon jumped into the water. It was shocking, the water was cold. Pulling himself up to take a gasp of air he realized the sirens were gone.

What the... Luke exclaimed, Mark. Oh my God. That's when he saw them circling around him slowly, watching him with hunger in their eyes. It's the thing. They're like sharks. They're like sharks, though.

Yeah, they're just circling around. They're like sharks. Uh, oh, oh, oh. Yeah, they're just circling their sharks They no longer had human legs instead they transformed it to a fish tail watching him the three moved Adam Ariel struck first Yeah, I guess you know when they get out of one remember like a splash when they get out of water They have legs. Okay get out of water. Yeah, you ever seen Luca? The show you gotta watch, Luca. Yes, oh I love Luca. Aerial struck first, pushing himself right against

the edge of the pool. The other two joining her sister as they giggle, caressing as if they placed their lips on his thighs. On his thighs. Nothing I get, nothing I get in a thigh. Soft touches as he moaned. Angel moved in slowly rubbing her hips as she started to slip her fingers over his cropping ass.

Angel gave him a hard squeeze as Pacific bounced up and down in his mouth, hooking a nipple and giving it to him before he fell down. Luke found himself moaning more as he watched them under the water angel and Pacifica's lips soon touching as they shared a kiss. The only this only causes Lucas Luke to get more turned on. Ariel smirked as she moved down, cupping his balls, giving them a firm squeeze and watching his member get fully erect. Oh yeah. Oh yeah, now we're in the thick of a coolly. Hmm, do you like this?

Errol said, Luke almost heard it like a gargling sound as he watched her begin to go down on him. Holy fuck, he grunted. Look, couldn't help that admitted. He'd always wanted to have a blowjob from a woman in the water, but he never imagined it would come true. Now, he's from a true mermaid. From a true mermaid, nothing like a blowjob in a water.

Watch her drown as she chokes out her stiff cock. Oh. Oh. It just keep holding her down there. Soon it was clear Luke could emit oxygen from his penis, Yeah, just keep holding her down there. Soon it was clear Luke could emit oxygen from his penis and she sucked on it like a snorkel. Luke can become everything he'd wanted to be a snorkelcock. A snorkel cock with a fire blowing wads of oxygen through the woods through the

ocean. The bubbles propelled him faster and faster across the top of the scene. He's great big giant cock providing oxygen to the whole ocean. He was like one of those things you see in Kankoon where people are floating on top of the water with by the feet. He had a butt-byes cock. An amazing stream of calm just coming out of him. Consisting out. Like, oh my god. Look at my body.

Look at my snorkel cock! His hips rolling more and more, two lurches than a smirk rubbing up against his body, then without more warning, they pulled him down. This shocked Luke as he was about to drown, I guess. More than anything, as he opened up his mouth, water flowing down his throat, he struggled through some, but Pacifica moved in and kissed his lips, breathing into his mouth, quite a shocking surprise. As he realized he could live, looking at her with stunned eyes, it's a sirens kiss. You'll be able to breathe underwater for an hour. It's for an hour. I'm gonna start a timer on my Apple watch. I said Pacifica.

Don't worry. It won't take about three minutes said Luke. I've got a snorkelcock, but I can't reach it. He pressed, she chuckled while playing with her breasts. Ariel moved in for the kill, pressing her body against him, rubbing together. He could feel Ariel's tail wrapping around him. She bit his neck, Angel moved in slowly. She would be biting his arm off, Pacifica reached down and cupped his balls. That's an arm. By the way, this is clearly a 13 year old boy because it's a lot of cupping of the balls

and kissing on weird places. And boob's bouncing on faces. Yeah, boob's bouncing on faces. Ha ha ha ha ha. Ugh. Ugh. Ugh. Ugh.

One inch. Oh my god. Oh, we ran out of time. I got aliens, I got monsters, I had a bunch of stuff. I thought we'd be able to get two or three of these. No. We didn't even get to one. Well, I think the porn hub was.

Yeah, the porn is a little extra. 30 minutes, that's right. Oh, we'll get back up. It's our annual sex show. That's our annual sex show. There it is. We've already had two this year. And annual sex show.

Our annual sex show. Annual sex show. Snor sex show. Annual sex. Snorkelcock. Snorkelcock. If you two have a snorkelcock, let us know. We'd like for you to be on our dating show. That's right, we'd like for you to be on our dating show. Chrissy and I are doing a dating show.

If you're trans, if you're bi, if you're straight, if you're cisgender, whatever the hell you are, let us know if you're interested in finding us in your beginner, if you're a creature. If you're a mermaid who likes to kiss thighs, you are. Let us know if you're interested in finding a creature. If you're a creature. If you're a mermaid who likes to kiss thighs, I guess. Let us know. If you have a snorkelcock, we'd like we'd be interested. Oh my god. Sorry, let me take a drink there. I got a little too into it. The character in my throwtour. Okay, guys, here's what you're going to do. Let us know if

you're interested in being on the TCB dating game, you can be anyone, anything into anyone or anything. We're going to figure it out for you. It's a virtual game, of course, and it's all in good fun. But who knows? You never know. Maybe you meet that significant other. That special someone. It's been a long time since we've been out in the world. We're giving you a chance to meet somebody. Yeah, it's something that's off the dating apps. That's right. Not, bar. T-S-E-S-E-S-E-S. Best, the number two, why oh yo, make sure you can call us. You can leave us a text message, you can send us a text message, whatever you feel like doing, or go to the website and contact us tcvpodcast.com.

Find out more about Chrissy and I. tcvpodcast.com find out more about Chrissy and I read all the show notes watch all the video listen to all the audio it's all there from one location at the commercial break on Instagram and youtube.com slash the commercial break like and subscribe for content you cannot find anywhere else we do it every single day of the week we're putting out clips and we doing an in the studio. Check out the Montenegru one this week It's really fucking funny. Actually, I think it's a really fucking funny. Okay, so until next time I have to say this I love you Chrissy. I love you, Brian. Best of you, Chrissy. Best of you. Best of you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time

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