The Commercial Break - The TCB Dr. Phil Thrill!

Episode Date: February 6, 2023

It's probably news to every TCB listener that Dr. Phil endorsed the podcast! TCB was young and it needed the press. As the new season starts Bryan breaks out an old ad the good doctor read for The Commercial Break. And it worked! Bryan & Krissy wonder...what's up with the TCB audience?? Season #4 is here! Dr. Phil is retiring after 30 years of daytime TV Dr. Phil is a cow doctor The Commercial Break once paid the TV doctor to do an endorsement Bryan's mom is finally proud of her son! Who is the most interesting daytime TV talk show host? #Blessed is cursed Why is everyone moaning behind the TV preachers? TCB digs into the feedback People do NOT like the "best of" episodes Bryan attends the podcast conference and the worst panel ever TCB now has 200 downloads... according the moderator of the comedy panel Krissy gets a new storage unit An Ask TCB kicks off the new season. LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us or leaving a voicemail at: 1.855.TCB.8383 Watch TCB on YouTube Creator: Bryan Green Co-Host: Bryan Green Co-Host: Krissy Hoadley Written By: Bryan Green Exec Producers: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Content Production & Research: Tina Khano YouTube Producer & Editor: Morgan Please Audio Editing: Christina A. Executive Director: Astrid B. Associate Producer: Gustavo Episodic Contribution: Marianne, Diane, Natalie, Will The Champ, Will D** Huge Thanks To Our Supportive Listeners, Friends, Family & Spouses: Astrid & Jeff!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

All right go go in five four three That's tomorrow and that is a Four three That's tomorrow and that is it for us today and we will leave you with a I Can't do it We'll do it live We'll do it live fucking Do it live I can all write it and we'll do it live, fuck it! Do it live! I can all write it and we'll do it live!

Fucking thing sucks! And, five, four, three. That's tomorrow and that is it for us today. I'm Bill O'Reilly. Thanks again for watching. We'll leave you with sting and a cut off his new album. Take it away. On this episode of the Commercial Break. Now the commercial break has new episodes each Monday, Wednesday and Friday on all podcast players and full episodes and daily clips available

on the YouTube channel at youtube.com slash the commercial break or you can visit tcbpodcast.com for more information. The commercial break! The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Ah yeah! Good to see you again! Welcome back to another episode of the commercial break on Brian Gring. This is my dear friend Kristen joy Holy best to you Chris You right to you out there in the podcast universe season number four 300 episodes in

Could you ever have thought would you ever have thunk it? No when you started this when I called you on a random Thursday as the pandemic was Raging its rearing its ugly head out of the ashes of China. Did you ever think for one second that we would be 300 episodes into this? Absolutely not. Neither did I, and when does it stop? We're on the wheel now.

That's right. I, you know, commercial break is like a good spanking in bed. I like it, but it hurts. It hurts. It hurts. It hurts. It sometimes it makes me come. I'm just saying. We're back from our break.

Season number four, here we are. And the most exciting thing that happened, welcome back to you. And the most exciting thing that happened while we were gone, the news, the breaking news, can you guess it? I mean, there's so much. Dr. Phil is no longer gonna be doing his show. Oh, wow.

21 seasons, 30 years he gonna be doing his show. Oh wow. 21 seasons. 30 years he's been doing that show for 30 years. Has it been that long? That's how old I fucking am because I remember when Dr. Phil came on the air. Wasn't he, he's not really a doctor. He's a doctor, but he's a doctor of like, is he a doctor or a cow? There was that whole thing with Oprah where he was like, she, something about the meat. She told people not to eat meat and then they sued her. Right. There was that. She's Oprah where he was like she something about the meat. She told people not to eat meat

And then they sued her right there was that the trial or something. Yeah, the deep state Cow people they Dr. Phil was a I don't know what he did what did he do? He was like he was an advisor trusted advisor He was an advisor. He was an advisor. He trusted advisor. A trusted advisor. Go back and look at some pictures of Dr. Filder in that era.

When he still had a little bit of hair. A little bit, yeah. He had that like, he still had no hair around the top of his head. You know, the ring around the rosy thing that some guys do, right? But it comes down over his ears a little bit. Like, I don't have any hair,

but the hair that I do have, I'm gonna make it long. Oh yeah. That's not gonna look like an idiot. We bust Dr. Phil's balls, like, we bust his balls, but the truth is, is that Dr. Phil has kind of been good to the commercial break, actually. So people may not know this,

that Dr. Phil actually did a series of commercials for us. One of the ways, one of the only ways that we got people to listen to us, was by advertising on other podcasts. Yeah. Well, somebody told me, somebody said, hey, listen, Brian, you know what you got to do? You got to go on that you got to advertise with the Dr. Phil show. And I'm like, have you ever listened to an episode of the fucking commercial break? Why in the world would you think that the Dr. Phil show would be a good fit for the commercial break? But this guy at the network convinced me, he's like, just do it. You know, they've had good results on other people. So in Dr. Phil show would be a good fit for the commercial break. But this guy at the network convinced me,

he's like, just do it. You know, they've had good results on other people. So and Dr. Phil will give us some fun. Well, Dr. Phil ended up doing, it actually did do well for us. I'm not sure what that says about it. His audience or our audience, but everybody's fucked up.

There's some crossover there. Yeah. I guess, I guess we're in the same category as Dr. Phil. He did three reads for us. And the same category as Dr. Phil. He did three reads for us. And the first one was terrible. I mean, God bless him, but it was just terrible. He was clear, he was reading exactly what we wrote in a way that was not funny, had a bit of irony in it.

And I was trying to like tell the producer, hey, there's, you're supposed to do this with a bit of sarcasm. Like tell him to put his best comedy face on and see if he can get a laugh out of people and do it. And but the first one didn't go well. The second one was a tad bit better and then he did a third commercial.

The third one was good. The third one was good. Do you want to hear it? Sure. It's been, this is like a year ago at this point, but I actually have the, no, that's not Dr. Phil. Hold on one second.

That could be. All right, ready? Here we go. Hey, I want to take a minute to thank our brand new sponsor, the Commercial Break. He's struggling just to, I'm tying a minute to Ricardo. Who's the next to the commercial? What? Comedy podcast for supporting the show. It's like a real life commercial break from all the serious things we're dealing with lately. That's why I recommend you take a listen to the Does he recommend he doesn't even know what the hell he's talking about yeah Did they pay the bill they did it? All right. I'll read it again commercial break and they pay us a lot of money

For us to talk to you about the show two long time time friends, Brian and Chrissy, get in the studio and discuss their friendship, stories from their personal life, and they take a deeper look at some of the absurd trends and topics they find on the internet. Here's where I think it's a real accomplishment on my, on my behalf to get Dr. Phil to talk about some of the trends on the internet. Oh, that's right.

Now, the commercial break has new episodes, each Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, on all podcast players and full episodes and daily clips available on the YouTube channel at youtube.com slash the commercial break or you can visit tcbpodcast.com for more information. The commercial break. That's tcbpodcast.com. So when you have a chance, take a listen to our new paid friends on this commercial break. Anywhere you like us, do your podcast or just visit

tcbpodcast.com. Yeah, I have to take the time to let people do it. Yeah, they're fang. Yeah, yeah, my favorite show. No, it is. But that, you know, if anything, we paid a lot of money so that my mom could tell her friends at the table at the senior citizen center. That's the first time a doctor filled. That's someone who was a doctor fill. That was her mom. Oh, she's,

Hi, baby, it's your mom. Hi, mom, how are you doing? I'm good. Where are you? You sound like you're in a tunnel. I'm in the bathroom. Hey, mom, guess what? What, honey?

Dr. Phil read in a commercial for us. The Doctor Phil? Yes, the Doctor Phil. For the commercial break? That's right, mom. I'm so excited. I got to tell Gene. You know Gene from Chicago? Yes, mom. I know Gene from Chicago. You excited I got to tell Jean you know Jean from Chicago.

Yes mom I know Jean from Chicago you have to tell me where she's from. Okay I was talking to Andy from Philadelphia and he was saying that he loves the doctor Phil show. Oh is that right mom? Can I have a copy of that? Sure mom. Do I turn it on the radio? Nope no radio there. How do I get your podcasts? Still don't know? Have no clue. My mom desperately wants to hear the show. Yeah. So I put it on one day in the car because this is the only way that she's gonna hear it. So she has a cell phone and she's like,

can I get it on my cell phone? And I said, yeah, you can, but she doesn't have the ability to download applications onto her phone. That's probably a good thing. That's a way good thing because my mom would have grind her on there. She'd have guys over cleaning her house, nude, because my mom wouldn't know the difference.

She just wouldn't know. So I tell my mom, I say, okay, how do I get the podcast? Here's how you get the podcast, but let me just play it for you on the thing. So I played her five minutes of someone episode of the show, And my mom had no earthly fucking clue what was going on. She had a, like, huh. She was like, is that what you guys do all the time? I'm like, yes.

And people listen. Not many, mom, but a few. Yes, they choose to listen. But she was so proud. Like, it's back to our old saying, it's not forever. It's not for everyone. And I'm glad it's not for our mom because it's just my parents do. Yeah, my mom doesn't need to hear all this.

No. My mom is probably acutely aware somewhere in the back of her head of all of the shenanigans that her son has been up to throughout the years, but she doesn't want to hear me talk about it out loud. That makes sense. We're Irish Catholic, we're bred to keep things deep down inside until the day that we die. Yeah.

Secrets are one thing Irish people are good at keeping because the priests taught us how to do it. Yeah. And we've been keeping it going for decades and decades. But my mom was so proud to be associated with Dr. Phil in some way, shape, or form that she could not stop telling the people out of her place about Dr. Phil in some way, shape, or form that she could not stop telling the people out of her place about Dr. Phil talking about her son's radio show. So when I went into the, my mom lives at a retirement home.

It's got like a cruise ship that doesn't go anywhere. You know what I'm saying? They feed them three times and then they have games and all that stuff. Yeah, activities. So when they feed them, they're all in this big dining hall, very nice place, but all's all in this dining hall And then she has a group of ladies and one man that she sits with and any time I've gone in there in the last six months My mom has to mention that Brian Dr. Phil was talking about Brian's radio show. I bet everybody's like, whoa

His radio show is incredible. What station are y'all son? Which AM station are you on, son? Which AM station are you guys on? The legend. Yeah, 96, 7, the legend, tune that in. 96, 7, the legend. So Dr. Phil, after 30 years, hanging it up. We're sorry. But the last time he signed a contract,

I think it was like for $150 million a year or something. Oh yeah, he's got, he and his children are set, their children, children, children. Yeah, it's his son that runs the podcast, like his son's in charge of the podcast network that also has Robin on it, Robin, his wife, and then I think his son also has one on there too. So occasionally you'll get him.

Yeah, why not? Just smoke it. Fuck yeah, listen, if I had to choose between daytime talk, talk show hosts to sit down and have a conversation with, I think the first and foremost, who would you pick? If a daytime talk show host from any genre, genre, what am I doing? Laundra. I'm doing Laundra. I mean, well, I think I have to go with Oprah. You would go with Oprah.

Yeah. I think that I would do, yeah, I guess I'd, I guess I'd, I think for the most fun, for the most bang for my buck, Dr. Phil would have to be the guy that I want to sit and talk with. Yeah. Because if you see him outside of that silly show he's gone, he actually does have a sense of humor, right? I think this they roasted Dr. Phil one time on Comedy Central.

I was thinking of comedy, maybe Ellen would be in there too. Okay, I could see you sitting down, Ricky Lake. Ricky Lake might be whatever happened to Ricky Lake. I don't know, I think she's still alive, but I don't know. To be honest with you, the person that I'd least want to sit down with is Jerry Springer, because he seems like the most boring outside of that telly. He was pretty boring on the television show. That's true.

He just happened to like be the ringmaster of that circus that was going on. These kids, these kids today, they don't even have the benefit of knowing that Jerry Springer is. Jerry Springer was a three wheeled train on fire running down the track with cows shitting out the back of it. It was the most incredibly, yeah, fucked up television show. When it's got worse and worse and worse, too, because you had to keep, they had to keep out doing themselves. I told you that I had three friends in high school that went,

called up the producers, wrote the producers, however they did it, wrote the producers saying that they were in a three, some and then there was like a, there was like a small dog involved, and then someone got married to their cousin. They had this outrageous story that they put together, and the producers called them back, flew them up to Chicago, where I think they were filming, flew them up to Chicago,

and brought them on, and didn't ask them a single fucking follow up question about this ridiculous story. They just took the story. They just said, if you can make it more dramatic, make it more dramatic than that. More dramatic than that. Yeah.

But it gets. Now, then people would get up and throw chairs and the security would have to come in. Yeah, it was all, it was all horses. Yeah, it was all horses. Yeah, I think 99.9% of it was staged. Dr. Phil is like a step up from Jerry Springer. It's a little bit of a step up, yeah.

Well, I go Jerry Springer at the bottom. Jenny Jones, Ricky Lake, next. Mori Povitch was in there. Mori Povitch is down below Jerry Springer. I don't want to put him on the radar. I don't even know what the fuck he's doing. That is the worst television show I have ever seen in my entire life. You are not the fuck. They're children. They're actual human beings involved in this. Imagine being a kid where

you found out who your father was on the fucking Mori Poe show. No, that's just crazy. That's when you have to go over to the doctor Phil showed to get some good advice and then you have to go to Dr. Oz to get some supplements to calm you down. And then you go to Steve Harvey. I like Steve Harvey. Steve Harvey's funny. Yeah, he is. Steve Harvey's funny.

You know who I want to talk shit? Who's got the talk shows now? There's Kelly Clarkson. Right. I see sometimes in the afternoon. Through Mary Moore I think has one. I just can't. I like Drew.

That is too. I think she seems like a lovely human being, but it all seems a little manufactured. Am I off base on this? I don't know, because I don't know her. You don't know? It could be true. You could be right.

I'm not talking about hers, the person, I'm talking about hers, the television personality. Yeah, a lot. It all seems a little fluffy and manufactured. Yeah, I think it's gotta be lighthearted. Hashtag blessed. Blast. Bl blessed. Blast. Blast.

One of, I'm gonna, I wanna add to the treaty right now. Can we stop saying blessed when someone asks you how you are? Ha ha ha ha. Blast, this mess is blessed. Blast, the mess is blessed. Have a blessed day. Ha ha ha. Go fuck yourself.

Ha ha ha. No one wants to hear it. Bless. What exactly does that mean? Bless. Yeah. It means I guess grateful. Grateful for the day, but just say that.

That's a grateful. That's what you say. How are you? I'm grateful that I woke up this morning with all my arms and my legs, my appendages attached. You have to say, blessed, no one cares. I didn't ask for that much detail. Just say, fine. Like everybody else does. What about what about thoughts and prayers?

Well, thoughts and I don't want to go there. Let's say this. I think that there are plenty of shows you can turn into to hear about thoughts and prayers. I'm not one of them. Fucking morons are all listen. When you say blessed to me, it indicates something. It gives me an idea of who you are as a human being. And I'm not saying that you, and that's so good. Oh, that's so good. That's so good.

Oh, that's so good. That's from the reason, the person that we did with the preachers. Uh, yeah, this, by the way, I had to go find that clip. So I was watching just the video, not us doing the video. Praise Jesus.

Oh yeah. But there's the guy, the guy's in the back who are making these, like these. That's so good. Like that kind of noises. They're also doing a lot of moaning. They're like, uh, uh, uh, uh.

And God told us on the third day to write a check for $1 dollars to my miniseries. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. That was so good. That was really funny. I had to be kind of close to the camera, like, to a microphone somewhere that you could hear him as well. You know, like into the World Series, they put like the microphones out in the crowd so

that they can hear people and occasionally hear someone like, you know, you're slaving with my wife. Or whatever they catch, right? Baba Booey. Get in the hole. Yeah, get in the hole. I hate that. It's a golf.

It's talking to the golf ball, first of all, second of all, we get the point of the sport. I get it in the hole. We understand, we got it But you can be proud now because on your DVR at home your voice is somewhere congratulations You want to hear your voice somewhere start a podcast. Yeah, your voice will be heard by his just as many people as on a golf tournament six so Yeah, they slowly throw that they throw those microphones in the crowd.

And I was watching that, and it is just so fucking funny to me that these guys, these prosperity preachers, get away with what they get away with, and they have so many people convinced, including the 15 guys in the audience to keep moaning every time the preacher says, give me more money, they're, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, this is the, oh, by the way, it's, there are 14 hours of unrecorded material to get to this episode.

And we're not even sure this episode is going to make it out. We're going to eventually have to put out something, but this has been, whenever Brian gets in the studio to go retool, I leave myself plenty of space because we've had now two and a half, almost three weeks off, or Christine, I have not been in the studio. I bought all new equipment. I knew I had to do it at some point. because we've had now two and a half, almost three weeks off, or Christine, I have not been in the studio, I bought all new equipment, I knew I had to do it at some point, and I was so fearful about this because I get it wrong every time.

There are so many wires that have been, they're coming in and out of the computer, up and through the ceiling, down and through the floor. Yeah, that all stayed the same. I didn't change that. I just left the old wires for fear that I'd fuck up the new wires. Right, and maybe you have to find that old wire. Yeah, you know our electric bills sky high right now,

because there's a bunch of wires that are providing electricity to nothing right now. So we got all this new equipment, and I'm trying to figure out this new board that we got in Chrissy and I. It's been a painful, we're going through a burthing process right now, like my wife. We're having a C section right here.

This is the second day. And you know know second day 12 time we've recorded this episode And by the way when we put an episode in the can you know it's bad because what we put out is pretty bad in the first place So when we don't even think it's funny. It's just done So yeah, so three weeks off, I had a baby. We were talking about Astrid being pregnant. Beautiful little baby girl.

Miranda? Miranda is the new one. I now have between four and six children. I'm not particularly sure, but I try and count every night before I go to bed. That's a good way to take care of it. Yeah, you know, I don't want to bore everybody with a story about a C section, because unless you've been through it, and that's probably less than half the audience has been through a C section, you have to be in the room, really, to understand just what kind of...

I can't, I don't think I could do it. They cut you open. They take out your guts. Here's... So, let me give you a little recap of it. So you go there early, about two hours early, right? Asked no food, no drink, asked her to get their two hours early.

They immediately they start putting the... I like the scheduling part of it. Yeah, that's the part that I do like about the C section is you know when it's gonna happen. Or you know the latest date that it's going to happen. Sure, I could get earlier. Because the two weeks beforehand, you're on call, right?

You don't wanna be too far away from home. But you get there a couple hours early, they hook you up to all kind of monitors. This has happened with both of Astrid C-sections, the second that we got in, and they put you on the contraction monitor, Astrid's in labor. So she was in labor the day of the C-section.

Isn't that crazy? That is crazy. Not like noticeable labor, day of the C section. Isn't that crazy? That is crazy. Not like noticeable labor, but she's having contraction. She's like the, her body's going in that direction. Wow. So the doctor's got it right on the timing. Well, yeah, the, in the United States of America, there is, it's either like a, I'm not a, I'm kind of a doctor,

like Dr. Phyllis, right? I'm not like an actual doctor. Play one on. I spend a lot of time on WebMD diagnosing my children and my wife, but I sense that, or in the United States of America, they will not let you have a C-section, a scheduled C-section unless you are already full term.

So you cannot, yeah, that makes sense. I don't know that they do that in every country. I've heard that in other countries, they'll do it two weeks beforehand or a week beforehand. Here, you have to do it the week after your full term. So you cannot, yeah, that makes sense. I don't know that they do that in every country. I've heard that in other countries, they'll do it two weeks beforehand or a week beforehand. Here you have to do it the week after your full term. So it's very possible that you could go into just like normal labor and then have what they would refer to as an emergency section, even though it's not, really, it just means they're hurrying up.

Unscheduled. Yeah, it's unscheduled. So you get there two hours beforehand and then the next thing that happens after all the monitors get hooked up and you take a couple pills and all this other stuff Is that you you take a couple bills on the way over I had asked her drive I was so nervous So a couple pills a couple gummies a little dibby dab. I knocked back a few rails in the bathroom Just so I was clear so I was had some. You didn't want to be awake. It felt normal.

Yeah, I mean, it's six in the morning, is early. You know, you got to get to give yourself a little lip. Oh, hit me up. Yeah. So I banged a couple of rails in the private bathroom in the hospital, but I'm not. No, but I knock in. That's for sure.

No one wants to see that, and that's the worst public restroom to use is the public restroom in a hospital, because you know that people are sick, they're shitin' their bloodin', it's all over, but this is a rather nice hospital. Anyway, so I banged a few rails and then I brought my coat can with I put some ashes on top of it

and I brought a little bit of crystal meth that I could hit right as the baby was born. Yeah, I climaxed as they were bringing my child out. like it hit right as the baby was born. Yeah, I climaxed as they were bringing my child out. Ugh. Yeah. So then the next thing that happens is the anesthesiologist comes in for the epidural.

This guy was floating on a cloud when he came through the door. They are always so funny. This is him. Ready? Swear to God. This is what happens. Door swings out.

I'm Dr. Shorma and I'm here to give your epidural, Astrid is your name. Yes, her name, you know, she says yes. Astrid is the name of the girl who just redesigned our office. It was all paisley now, it's pastel, it's amazing. And I'm like, hey, settle down, I got a baby coming. Like, I got a baby coming.

You're, you're mellowing. They're usually pretty care, they're characters. Yeah, they're, they're, I think they're tasting their own drugs. I think so too. You know, you're the anesthesiologist and you're the one that's ordering all the morphine. Why wouldn't you just a little bit for me, a little bit for you? Yeah, I'll talk to you. To for you, one for me, you know what I'm saying?

But I had to tell the guy, like calm down a little bit, you know, you're, I just bumped a couple of rails, you're chill out. You're knocking me out. Chill out, man. What are we, Coke bros? Come on, bud, chill out. Lacking me out. Chill out, man. What are we, Coke bros? Come on, bud, chill out. This guy was zipping around the room. You're like, I'm not, you don't have to suffer, I get it.

No, no one's as good as the anesthesiologist. So then you, so then they give you the epidural and the funny thing is that they would give you the epidural and then what they do is they take a glove full of ice, ice water and then they start putting it all over Astrid's body and saying, can you feel this? Can you feel that? Can you feel this? Astrid, 15 minutes into this.

Like you're supposed to be pretty dead numb from the boobs down. The first time you get the first shot of medicine for the epidural, Astrid was three shots in, and still feeling things and they give her a fourth shot and I was really admiring her constitution. It's like me when I go to the dentist and I ask for the nitrous, I have to tell them to

keep turning it up. Like keep turning it up. They have a note. They have a note. I just got a root canal a couple days ago and they have a note in the system. It's like needs a lot of nitrous. That's what the nurse said. She said, oh, I see the note here, you need extra nitrous.

And I was like, yeah, thanks. It's please. So they do this and then they bring you in and they make the father wait outside when they scrub up and get her prep her for surgery. What they do is they put a big plastic sheet between like essentially right above her boobs, like her shoulders.

And then I sit behind the plastic sheet with Astrid and then the anesthesiologist Assistance or right there. I could if I wanted you I could stand up. I can The worst mistake I have ever made in my life and every guy who has been through it will tell you the same mistake Natural birth the first time natural birth, the first time. Natural birth, when the doctor says, here comes the head, do you wanna see it? Yeah. And you're like, in your head, no, no, no, no, no, no.

But in your heart, you're like, yeah, I wanna witness. I should be a part of this, right? I should see what's going on. This is humanity at work. This is how we get along as human beings. I should see what's doing down there. I helped get it in there. I should watch it come out, right? So it is war. It is war. It is war. Tell. Don't look, guys. Don't look. So I'm not going to make the mistake of looking during

a C section. Right. No. So the doctor who we love, the doctor, is there with a couple of like students that he's teaching. Okay. Yeah. So, there's like six or seven people that are on the other side, they're all working on answered in some capacity. Yeah. This is the day at the office for them.

No, that's the medical shows are real then, where they have this little team of people following the doctor around. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, I'm not sure what they do, but okay of people following the doctor around. Absolutely. Yeah, I'm not sure what they do, but okay, they're there. They're staring at my wife's vagina. Whatever's going on down there. But what I'm saying is it's a day at the office for them. It'd be like if you and I were at Clear Channel, you walk in the door, we banter, we're laughing,

we're joking, we're having a good time sipping on our coffee. This is the beginning of their day. So for them, it's another day at the office. And they're talking like it's another day at the, oh, hey, Starbucks. I don't know if you're allowed to bring in Starbucks, but my coat can't fold a crystal meth perfectly fine. Perfectly fine.

So they're bantering back and forth. And here's what I heard that disturbed me the most during this whole procedure. Here's what I heard. I need you to move the bladder. He heard. I need you to move the bladder. He said, I need you to move the bladder. I was like, don't move the bladder. What are you doing?

Were you listening to music? Is music allowed? I think you could listen to music. We were asked the first time if we wanted to hear music inside of there, but the second time we weren't asked. So I didn't say anything. And then they yank the baby out, right? And the whole table shakes

because they are really yanking the baby out. So the whole table shakes, it's kind of disturbing. They show you the baby and then they go clean it off. Then you go spend three days in this hotel room like setting, right? This is sweet. Sweet. The birthing suite.

At this place where we had the baby, there's 29,000 children a year born. It's the busiest birthing hospital in the world. That's wild. And so they got this down to a science so good. That's so good. Oh yeah. Oh.

That's so good. You just took $10 from me. That is so good. I want to learn that That's like raise Jesus raise Jesus He just took us out of the dollars from you raise Jesus He's telling you he built this shitty church with your money and all the extra went into his pocket. Praise Jesus! Oh, that's so good. I love that. That might be one of my favorite episodes of this money.

There's more of that guy, by the way. We'll do some more coming up in season 4. So then you go to this sweet, right? It's this part of the sweet. It's a hotel of the sweet. It's a hotel. There's a, it's a couch that turns into a bed and you sleep there. Then they have this, it's incredible because there's seven stories that are all sweet and then they have these huge long hallways and in the middle and at the end of each hallway, they have like a snacking area.

So they have coffee brewing at any time. You can get water, there's a refrigerator, a microwave, all kind of free snacks. It's like happy hour at an NBC suite. It's all free. It's not good, but it's all free, right? It's the shittiest of the shit, but they figure if they're gonna charge you $40,000

for a C-section, or for birth, you can have peanut butter crackers if you want all day long. So this is my third time now, being at this same hospital, doing this same routine. So I got it, I've got this licked. What I started to notice. And I'm not a doctor's nurse. I know.

I see you. Good to see you. And you. That's a half a million dollars you've spent. I have a plaque on the wall. I have a brick. Yeah, I have a brick. A brick, I have a plaque on the wall. I have a brick. Yeah, I have a brick. A brick, I have a wing for my four to six children.

So what I started to notice, like on day number, like toward the end of the night on the first day, as because I had to get up and stretch my legs and walk out and I started to notice that there was a distinctive look, a difference between the new parents, the new dad, the guy who's having his first. And guys like me, who are on number one. I'm sure.

The guys, and I must have looked like this too, my first time. I know you did. When you walk around the new dad. They only allow, right now, they're only allowing partners in there, right? Now that could be a female, but mostly it's males, right? Men with their wives or girlfriends or whatever. So the thing you say as you're walking down the hallway

is congratulations, right? Congratulations to you because you just had a baby, obviously. Right. When you're in the little Snicksnack area, it can be crowded in there, there's two or three guys. I started playing a game with myself, like I'm gonna make a little conversation and based on the way that they look, their faces look,

I'm gonna determine, I'm gonna guess whether or not it's all their first or their fifth, right? And I was right 100% at the time. Because the guys who just had a brand new baby, look, it's like a daddy graveyard in there. They're all walking around like zombies. They have no idea what they're gonna do. They have no idea what to do. No clue.

And there's no handbag instructions. No, there's no instructions. I wish there was an issue. I mean, yeah, there's feed them water them. They're like gremlins. Feed them, don't water them after midnight. It's kind of the same thing. They raise each other after a minute. Just let that one raise that one. Well, Matthias is going to raise Miranda, right? Matthias is a 70 year old, four year old. He's an old man. He really is. He complains like an old man. He talks like an old man. Why didn't you take a right there? He's a backseat driver. Hey, daddy, why didn't you take a right then?

Because that's not the way that we go. Why? Because that's not the way we go. Mommy goes that way. Yeah, I'm not driving like your mother. Yeah, you drive too fast. Start selling me, I drove too fast. The other day he's like,

Dad, why are you going so fast? Because. Because it's not an answer. You go pretty fast. Wait. Trying to get places. Yeah. In Atlanta, you have to drive fast.

Tell me the answer. No, you have to drive fast. If you don't want to die, you have to keep up with the traffic. If you're going 55 miles per hour on Georgia 400, it's like... Yeah, it's going to cause a wreck. It's like, yeah, it's gonna cause a wreck. It's like who's saying bolt running past me while I'm walking at the river, right? It is you, everybody's going so fast.

People go in average of 80, but a lot of people are going 90 or 100 miles per hour. True. And where are the fucking police? I don't know. Where are they? I was going like 75 on my way up here in the rain, mind you. That's fast for you.

I know and a car came flying by me. I was like, really? Huh, in the rain. You know what I think? I think the cops don't want to get fucking shot for pulling somebody over. I think they're like, whatever, not worth my time. Yeah.

Why? So I can give this guy a ticket and he's going to go to court, pay a fine and he's going to be there tomorrow. Yeah. But he could have, you know, a bag full of dippity dabs or sniffity snorts. You know what I'm saying? Like it just might,

the police might be kind of throwing their hands in the air and being like, yeah. Well, there's other more important things maybe. There are way more important things to catch in a guy, but that's why I don't like taking the highway sometimes is because I fear for the safety of my children when I'm driving down the highway with them because there's a lot of fucking idiots.

And here's the thing, it's usually the guys, and I'm saying guys, because it's mostly guys, it's the guys who are driving the fastest, who know least about driving. Do you know what I'm saying? Like actual driving. Yeah, the skills aren't good. You know, it's just a ridiculous thing. So I just don't do it. So, so we have the baby and then, you know, we come back home, like the good father that I am,

three days later I attend a podcast conference. That's right. Yeah. Yeah. Rightfully so I got a lot of looks from the people in the podcast community. Didn't you just have a baby I saw on Facebook? Yeah.

Yeah. I did. She's fine. Yeah, two days old. The left her with the dog. Blue's got her covered. She sleeps a lot. She sleeps a lot.

That's fine. I left her with a bottle. You know one of those cat things that drop water? I put breast milk in there. She just goes and licks it when she needs it. Hey, listen, don't think I'm an asshole. I left her with the outer diaper so she doesn't get a rash. Okay.

Yep. Yep. Hey everybody out there in the podcast universe, it's time for the dreaded commercial break inside the commercial break. It's season number four. You've heard it all before, so let's get to it quickly. You can text us or leave us a voicemail at 1-855-TCB-8383. Questions, comments, concerns, or content ideas send them to 855-TCB-8383 toll free from

anywhere in the world. Visit our website tcbpodcast.com to listen to any of the audio, watch any of the video, or send us a message, hit the contact us button. Instagram and TikTok at The Commercial Break, and now YouTube videos the same day they air on the audio feed, villereyoutube.com slash The Commercial Break. Chrissy and I are very grateful every time you choose to listen to The Commercial Break. If you're ever in the market for our sponsors, products or services, all we ask is that you use the specialized URL's or codes.

Thanks again for being part of the TCB family. Now let's hear from those sponsors and we'll be back to this episode of the Commercial Break. So I go down to this... Chrissy. Some people know this about me, some people don't. I have a job currently in the podcast industry. So not only am I a world famous podcaster in my head, but then I also have this job. So I go down to the podcast conference, part for work and then part for the commercial break.

I get an invitation like three weeks before this. I'm on multiple panels, like I'm speaking everywhere over at podfest, right? But I get an invitation to go speak at this comedy panel. Now be funny. Yeah. Hey, here, monkey. Now, laughs. It's stupid. It's the stupidest fucking thing I've ever. Honestly, Chrissy, it's the worst panel I have ever been a part of. Kind of hard to. I would, I can imagine to try and teach that to people or to... There is nothing to teach people. It's very improvised that what we do at least.

What? So this guy, I'm not even going to mention his name because I'm not even going to give him the dignity of having his name set on the show. Not because I dislike the guy, I don't know the guy, but because when you have a panel and you are the moderator of that panel, there are two jobs and two jobs only. You find out who the fucking people are on the stage and you make sure you're intro them properly. Yes. And number two, you have some questions prepared that will engage discussion about

the topic that you want to do. I've moderated a million panels. This is, it's not hard. You, actually, you got the easiest job on the stage. You just have to say a couple of things, ask a couple of questions, right? Get the ball rolling. So this guy invites me to come on the, the comedy panel. There is no other, it just says comedy panel,

comedy panel. What is that? What are we gonna do? So I felt like, like most appearances that you would make, it's, this is, he's gonna call me a couple days ahead of time or set up a conference call. We're all gonna pit or pat or a little bit, right? We're gonna make sure we don't piss on each other's Cheerios.

Yeah, sounds normal. Yeah, you could have done this much better than he did. But he doesn't call. He doesn't write and he doesn't get us ahead of time. I'm there because I told him on like, this little messaging app, I'm like, hey dude, we should meet 10 minutes ahead. I'm there because I told him on like this little messaging app. I'm like, hey dude, we should meet 10 minutes ahead. I'm trying to like not step on his toes. But I'm like, hey dude, we should meet 10 minutes ahead of time to make sure that we're all, you know,

we all have the on the same page. And he says, that's a great idea. I'll be there. I've never thought of that. I never thought of that. Splendid idea. Wonderful. That Brian Green has a brain the size of Houston I've never seen such a mind he came up with an idea like that didn't even ask put it right out there that Brian green he's a real spicy one you ought to make sure you're on his team so I'm like okay ten minutes ahead of time I'm gonna go there he doesn't he doesn't message So I'm like, okay, 10 minutes ahead of time. I'm gonna go there. He doesn't, he doesn't message us to tell us to be there 10 minutes ahead of time.

He just says, great idea. I'll be there. I get there 10 minutes ahead of time. He's not there. He's not there. So all of us are standing around going, well, I guess there's not even chairs on stage. We have to bring our own chairs on stage.

Not even kidding you. Oh my God. It's a tiny little stage in a corner, find whatever it is what it is. It's a conference. We've all seen them. We've all been to them. Did you notice if our matchmaking guy was like down the hall at another conference room? Oh, you know, he doesn't get conference rooms. You talking about Adam the liar?

Adam the liar is up in a hotel room. He can't afford the conference room. He doesn't he can't afford the conference. You know, it was in there the same thing. The American hardwood floor expo was there, which those guys are a laugh minute. If you want to get I went over into that conference and they were doing better panels than the comedy panel and telling you that much right now. The panels about wood panels were better than the comedy panel. That the fifth fucking podcast conference. This guy, so here, ready?

You know, hey everybody, welcome to the comedy panel. This is gonna be Lucy Goosey, we're gonna have a lot of fun, we're gonna ask a lot of questions. We got four really funny people up here, experts, all experts in comedy. Three of these people are standup comed comedians and you're gonna love it. Three of us are stand-up comedians. I hope you're not talking about me. I hope I'm the not the person that's a stand-up comedian. So then he said, so I want you to get your questions ready. Anything

about comedy, these people can answer. They have done it all, right? And I'm like, oh my god, don't hype us up like this. How'd it be funny? Yeah, exactly. We'll get to that part. So then he goes through, there's two lovely girls up there, 10K a day. I'll give their podcasts a shout out. I've listened to it, you know, on the way home, I listen to it, 10K a day, these two girls, right? They do in soft comedy like the two of us on their show.

And they take $10,000 imaginary dollars and decide what they're going to do for the day with it. And they do the research. So you can actually like, whatever it is you can do for $10,000 a dollars and decide what they're gonna do for the day with it. And they do the research. So you can actually like whatever it is you can do for $10,000 a day. You can actually take $10,000 and do this. Wow. Anyway, they're perfectly lovely. He intros them.

I have no idea if the information he's giving is correct or not because I don't know, because I don't know these two girls podcasts, right? And then he goes to this guy Jeff that we know Jeff Dawos and and he says you know i hear Jeff to ask and he's got the uh... uh... Jeff to ask and show not the name of the show he you know you can be found at youtube dot com Jeff to ask and not true uh... he has over you know fifty thousand uh... subscribers not true then he goes this is brion green and uh... he has a wonderful uh... podcast he does with his uh... co-host Kristen and uh... they

have the commercial breaks and i'm like the problem is there's only one microphone and he's holding it so i can't retort he didn't even have microphone oh my god christy so i can't even retort so i just sit there what am i gonna do right i'm i'm gonna yell out you're wrong! Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Right. Ha ha ha ha.

And then this is what he says. The commercial brakes has over 200 downloads per episode. Ha ha ha ha ha. I'm like, you're giving us way too much credit, personal. Second of all, where in the good fuck did you find that information? Where did you get that? Brian.

Brian's a standup comedian. Brian's a standup comedian. He called, he were part of the standup. Brian's a standup comedian and he's got four dogs at home. Let's welcome Brian Green. He's got four dogs. He's got four dogs in a lizard. Talking Farakie. And a baby. Brian enjoys peanut stretch, African penis stretching on his time often. Sonning is bumhole. Paranel, sonny, Brian's into Paranel, sonny. Then this guy proceeds to take up, this is a 30 minute panel.

First of all, it's crazy to have a 30 minute panel with four people because no one's ever going to get to talk. Second of all, he proceeds to talk for the next 26 minutes of the 30 minutes. He opens it up for questions and exactly what comes out of someone's mouth. Ready? Uh, my name is David and I got a podcast about trucks. Well, don't have a podcast, but I'm thinking about starting a podcast about trucks. I just came over from the Hardwood Floor Convention.

I think I'm funny, but I don't exactly know that anyone else thinks I'm funny, but I like to laugh at myself. How exactly do I anyone else thinks I'm funny, but I like to laugh at myself. How exactly do I find out if I'm funny? I like that. Did everybody ever rush to take that question? Well, of course Jeff did because he's Jeff, right? He did stand up comedy, so now he's gonna give his answer.

This other guy that was with, I won't even mention his name, this other guy is pitching a stand up comedy class that he does online, and I'm like, oh my God, I didn't even answer any of the questions. Yeah. Because there's nothing that I can add to this. It's been a train wreck since the beginning, and I'm not gonna add to the train wreck. I'm just not gonna do it. I'm not gonna play the game, right?

Right. But afterwards, I inevitably get people that come up and they're like, oh, I love the commercial break. It's a great, it's a great podcast. What is it about? Stand up comedy? No, that's not correct. It's one guy goes,

I got a podcast and people tell me all the time that I am hilarious. But I start to try and ride a joke and I just can't do it. How does one go about riding a joke? Oh, God. And I was like, listen, Jimbo or whatever your name is. There are videos online, there's a place called YouTube.

You can go youtube.com, you can go there and you can pretty much find out any information in the world, Wikipedia. I can name a bunch of different websites. I am not the guy to ask this question because I have never written a joke in my life either. And if you would have listened to one episode of the commercial break, you would understand

that that's the case. You would understand that that's the case. This is the worst. This is the worst. And what do you do? What do you do about this? Once you're up on stage, there's nothing to do.

You're stuck there, right? You are stuck. So you know, you know how I said he got the name of Jeff's podcast wrong. Right. So I didn't even correct them about our podcast. Yeah. Because first of all, there's 12 people in the audience.

None of which look like they're going to listen to the commercial break. None of which look like they're up for our kind of comedy. Right. You know what I'm saying? And there really were four of the 12 people really were from the hard floor, hardwood floor convention. Oh, that's so funny.

They came over because one of the people up on stage asked them to come over, they met at a bar or something and they gave it to ask it. So when it came my turn to talk, which I talked for three seconds, and all I said was the name of Jeff's podcast, this classic conversation, FYI, and I handed the mic over to the next guy.

I'm like, I don't even know what to do. Never again, will this guy, never again, I'd be on a panel with this guy. Never, never again. We had a lot of great feedback while we were gone. We did. I noticed that. You know, so many people were digging back into way back. Way, way, way back. Did you read that? I was the one that said, we're me and my wife for 30 beers in. We're 30 beers in and listening to 100 episodes of the commercial break.

I think his name was Mike. His name was Michael, wasn't it? Yeah, it was Michael. So many of you have written us via email, have texted, have called the phone line. I just want to let you know that we're super appreciative. A lot of people said congratulations on the baby. Have you had the kid?

Yeah, you know, a couple of people said Chrissy's hot. You know, they had normal stuff. They're nice. They never say Brian's hot. I never get that one. And I just want to, I think we've taken the time to respond to everybody if we haven't will get to you. But I just wanted to say thank you very much for writing in for all the well wishes, for

sticking with us all this time. And we love you. We love you. And we, but all of that said, but you knew there was a butt coming, right? But we had one or two jack offs, and I call them jack offs, but I'm really not too angry with them, but they wrote into complain about the best of. I want to set the record straight about the best of. I'm'm gonna explain to everybody right now. So when next time we do best ofs, they understand. We know that it's a podcast. We know you can go back and listen to any episode

you want to at any time. That is unless we've taken it down off of the other SSB. And there might be more of those, so get your fill now, right? Because the deeper we get in, the worse those first episode sound. I mean, they're just terrible. But do go back and listen to Bob, Bob, Bob, Bob.

Bob, Bob, Bob is good. It's really fun. Yeah, but that's episode number, that's season three, isn't it? Bob, Bob, Bob, Bob? No. Season two. No, it was when we were in the old studio. Yeah, but that was season two.

We were in the old studio, season two. Whatever, it doesn't matter. Okay, let's go back and listen to the old episodes. I understand you can press play, but a couple of people complain. They were like, don't do best stubs, just don't do anything, because then we think there's a new episode.

Listen, we can't just do nothing. That's the nature of the game that we're playing. It, we have to put out content, not for you listeners who have been listening for a long time, heard every episode. I get it, we're rehashing old stuff. It's for the new listeners, who are not yet used to TCB,

that may not have heard it and Consistency is everything in this business and that's why Chrissy and I are doomed to fail because we have never been consistent on anything It I like we're consistently inconsistent. That's correct the one thing we're getting fucking right is that we put out an episode every Monday Wednesday and Friday regardless So I get it I understand the best of's are not everybody's favorite thing because they're just getting fucking right is that we put out an episode every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Regardless. So I get it. I understand the best of us are not everybody's favorite thing because they're just rehashing old content.

But give us a fucking break. Well, we do. We have to take breaks. 146 episodes and it's season not enough for you. What else do you want from me? What do you want from my life? Honestly, 146 fucking episodes of new content. Yeah, that's crazy. 206 hours of new content and you guys are still not pleased. You're upset

because I ran a best up. Just like you. God forbid you have a baby. God forbid life gets in the way. I'm gonna lose my legs tomorrow. The terrible car accident on Georgia 400 and you people are gonna be like, who needs, you don't use your legs on the podcast. What's up with the best of? You could sit in a wheelchair, dude. I mean, I kind of think of it as a badge of what's the saying?

Like, you know, badge of honor. Well, badge of honor, but onto the next step, like it's a graduation. Yeah. You know, to get the haters. Oh, yeah. You know, well, we graduated like episode number three. I love the reviews. When the reviews are like worst comedy podcast ever.

Thanks for taking the time. Thanks for taking the time. Thanks for taking the time to review the show. Or some people give us like three stars and they'll be like, I wouldn't listen to the show again, but three stars forever. It's growing on me like a weed. It's growing on me like a weed. It's choking me out.

People, they take the time to write a review. I have never taken the time to write a negative review. I don't even want to waste my time. Okay, the show is done. By the way, I've been on the search for the worst podcast ever and I think I found it because what I wanted to do is I wanted to compare whether or not to do food. Like I wanted to look at some really, I wanted to hear some really bad shows. Okay. That I have like no listeners,

maybe they only did 10 or 15 episodes, they're making an effort at doing a comedy podcast, but clearly it's not for them, right? Right. And I think I found it. I think I found the world's worst comedy podcast and then I wanted to measure us against that comedy podcast.

I want to see, are we a little bit funnier than that show that I personally think is the worst show? Yeah, not the best, mediocre, but not the best. But not the worst. But not the best. Not the best, not even mediocre, like real sloppy shit. Not the best, but not the worst. Well, you know, where they talk about cussing

and fucking ghosts and stupid shit like that Wait, that's us And I found the show Wow, and I'd like to report back that I don't know if we're all that much better I'm not gonna listen if I'm giving my honest opinion all right. You want to do one ask tcb Sure before we wrap it up. You have anything to say no If I'm giving my honest opinion. All right, you want to do one Ask TCB? Sure. Before we wrap it up, you have anything to say? No, I'm glad we're back. I missed it.

I missed a laughing. I didn't want to be that guy that didn't give you panel time. Well, while you were gone, I got some good cleaning storage unit out time. You got a storage unit? Yeah, we had a storage unit and it was very crowded and I cleaned it out so boom. Organization. You are Marie calendar, like the pie company.

Who is that lady? Marie condo, I think too. Condo? Is that Marie condo? Okay, oh, NDO. Did she still doing her little videos? I don't know. I didn't watch the original ones.

Oh, you didn't watch the original ones? What was it like? I did read the other day that she said that she's actually not that worried about organization anymore. She's got three kids and she just wants to enjoy the kids. Oh, she totally blew the bubble. She was like, no, fuck it all that. She was breaking out.

All that stuff I said, forget it. Yeah. All that, all that throwing out you did get it back. That was back without kids. Yeah. People are throwing away like first pictures of their children and first certificates and stuff. Get it back. Get it back. Get it back. Get it back. Get it back. Get it back. Get it back. Get it back.

Get it back. Get it back. Get it back. Get it back. Get it back. Get it back. Get it back. Get it back.

Get it back. Get it back. Get it back. Get it back. Get it back. Get it back. Get it back. Get it back.

Get it back. Get it back. Get it back. Get it back. Get it back. there's some old lady, perfectly nice, super sweet. You can see how she's interacting with everybody. She's super sweet. You know, I'm next. Yeah. Hi, welcome to Starbucks.

How are you? You know, I'm good. How are you? I am blast. I'm automatically angry. I'm like, I don't know why that makes me upset, but it makes me upset. Okay, here's a message from our good friend, Christine.

Hey, dear Brian and Chrissy, need some advice and maybe I should be asking Mr. Mrs. Manners about my trivial problem, but since I listen to you every day, it feels like I'm talking to friends. Good for you. Nice. We're not your friends. Where are you, John? I'm just to friends. Good for you. We're not your friends. Um, where are you, John? I'm just kidding, hashtag Blast. There's a wedding of a dear friend's daughter coming up. And the last one we attended, we receded at the table

with all the other old friends of that mom. This group is mostly women that my husband has been friends with since grade school. One of these ladies has an obvious crush on my husband and after a drink or two, she starts to get a bit handsy. Not wanting to be an asshole or make a scene I've mostly ignored it. Other than staring directly at her hand on my husband's thigh

and then looking at her face, looking back at her hand and then back at her face, which most people would pick up on not so subtle hunt, not, not so subtle hint of bitch, take your hand off my husband's thigh. How should I handle the inevitable groping that is coming to him? Uh, I would say, I think you sit next to her. Yeah, you should sit next to her. That's a good idea. You cockpock. That's a good idea. You cockflock.

I've done this before. Get physically in between. Yes. Good job. This is a good idea. I was saying that is what happened. Dan's on in. You just dance on in.

Yeah, between. Happy day. You're gonna rub your tits against my husband's back. That's right. You sit next to her. Yeah, basically getting next to her. Basically, getting between it, but you know what, Christine, in a bit of serious advice, your husband should be responsible for taking her hand off his thigh and you should talk

to your husband. It's not your responsibility to cockblock other women from your husband. It's your husband's responsibility to mind his own business and stay out of the purview of other women. Now, I get it, it's complicated because he's been friends with his women for a long time. I run into the same situation all the time. I've got lots of girlfriends that don't want to sleep with me.

Everyone gets angry and jealous. I'm just like a, I'm just a, I'm like one of those Hawaiian dinner rolls. Everybody wants to stare at me and butter me up and eat me. You married the perfect woman with acid because she is like the most level headed non jealous person at all. Yeah, she doesn't care. Because you really do have a total of a many friends.

Yeah. See, I wonder if she's level headed or if she's just like, I just married him. I just married him for the commercial break money. I don't give a shit sleep with her you want to. Your husband should really be the one that said something to this lady. He should say, I am married and it's inappropriate for you to get handsy with me

because it makes my wife uncomfortable. And so while we can be friends, I would appreciate it if you don't cause drama for me or make the situation uncomfortable for my wife. Could you please take your hand off my dick? I mean, that's just it. Take your hand off my dick.

Yeah, he can at least just kind of avoid her. Or, or, and if, and if you haven't thought about this, I'm just going to drop a hand. Sister wife. Sister wife. Yeah, maybe just. Sister wife. Let your guard down and welcome her in let your guard down Drop your panties. Yep, everyone have a big party. Another house. Yeah, listen get a trailer

Listen Here's my opinion you want to turn your husband off to other women have a threesome with him in this girl He's gonna find out real quick that it's not as sexy as he thinks it is. And then completely ignore him the whole time. Maybe she should, maybe she should like Jedi mind the other woman and start getting handsy with her. Oh yeah. Oh, that's not a bad idea either. We've given you seven good solutions here. Four of which probably get somebody arrested, but whatever. either. We've given you seven good solutions here. Four of which probably get somebody arrested, but whatever. We want to hear about it. Don't call me for bail, but call me when you get out of jail. Don't call me for bail. Speaking of call, are we going to mention these? Yeah, well, listen,

we don't have the actual line set up yet, but coming soon in season four, coming soon, Chrissy and I are going to have a live phone line in the studio where you can call and talk to us while we're recording. So keep an eye out, keep an eye out, keep an ear out, keep an eye out. What does he say, keep an eye out? So fucking podcast. If you're watching on YouTube, keep an eye out. You can watch it on YouTube.

That's right. Keep an ear out. We'll drop that phone line to you and tell you when you can call to be a part of the show because we just want to, we want to get you guys more and more involved out there in the podcast universe. We've got a lot of exciting things. It's quite frankly, we're running out of content. So we need to.

We've got a lot of exciting new things. We're gonna have a treaty on the website, possibly where you can go and sign. Possibly. We're gonna, yeah. It's an open. I did an open. Which I was guaranteeing, it's not gonna get done.

Sure. There you go There's a lot of exciting stuff coming up in season number four where we've made it through one of the 162 episodes We're gonna do this season so good for you. Cheers We wanted to come on we wanted to give you an update. Let you know we're still alive. Yes, let you know we love you Praise Jesus. Praise Jesus. Oh, that's good. You can still get a hold of us at 855-TCB-8383. That's 855-TCB-8383. Text us or call and leave a voice message. Questions, comments, concerns or content ideas. We take them all at 855-TCB-8-3, text us or call and leave a voice message, questions, comments, concerns or content

ideas. We take them all at 855-TCB-8383 and if you want AE21-EPM sticker, 21, ejaculations per month. You put that on the back of your car and you send me a picture, I'll send you more swag. I swear to God I will. I'm waiting for the day that I'm driving down the highway. I can't wait. I thought about it. Yeah. So we've had our for the day that I'm driving down the highway. I can't wait, I'm thought about it.

Yeah, so we've had our first couple batches of stickers gone out the door. If you've already sent your address, don't worry, Astrid will get you out of the sticker and possibly an extra special surprise. We'll see. If you want a sticker, you can email us infoattsvpodcast.com or go to the website, tcbpodcast.com and drop us a line at the contact us button. Make sure you put your physical address in there. I'm not a mind reader.

Yes, we've got them on the back of our books. Chrissy's got it on the notebook. You can also go to Instagram where Astrid started posting again, new exciting stuff. We also have a TikTok all at the Ask the Duck Commercial Break. Oh, we do have a TikTok now. We do have a TikTok now.

All right, I love our little promo video that we've done. Yeah, it's great. Go to at the commercial break and you can check it out. Please give us a follow if you don't mind. And, and, and, and least we forget Morgan and her magic fingers making our videos ever so special. They are lovely, they are funny. There's a whole new way to look at TCB.

I promise you, it's a different episode when you go and watch it and it will release exactly the same time that the audio does. So now, if you're listening to the show and you're like, oh, I want to go see what Brian and Chrissy are doing. You know, because it's a physical comedy show. It'll be there. Right there, youtube.com, slash the commercial break

or hashtag commercial break is our handle. So there you go, Chrissy. There you go. One out of 675,000 episodes down, 250 million to go. Make it in those Washington's. Make it in those Washington's. Make it in those Washington's. One Washington at a time.

All right, well, I guess that's all we can do for today. I think so. I would say, I love you. I love you. Best to you, my friend. Best to you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I always say we do say and we must say goodbye. I'm gonna stay in there, I'm gonna stay in there I'm gonna stay in there, I'm gonna sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad