The Commercial Break - This Dude From Detroit Has Been Verified

Episode Date: April 9, 2021

Lil Naz X has blood in his shoes and Bryan and Hoadley want a pair!! The gang reads more hate mail and invites Jeff Dwoskin from Detroit to help suss out a new media social strategy! Episode Notes On this episode the gang is swinging from rafters...Bryan and Hoadley are talking all things poly, swingers and swapping! Bryan shares his story about visiting a swingers party. They discuss resorts dedicated to swapping, suburban neighborhood wife sharing and much more! Its a NSFW episode of The Commercial Break (which one isn't ??)! LINKS: Watch this episode on Youtube Subscribe to The Commercial Break Podcast Youtube Channel New Episodes on Tuesdays and now Fridays everywhere! Text or leave us a message: +1 [phone] FOLLOW US: Instagram: @thecommercialbreak @bryangcomedy @tcbkrissy ClubHouse: @bryangreen @tcbkrissy ClubHouse: The Commercial Break Club on Clubhouse! (home of live recordings) Twitter: tcbbryan Facebook: The Commercial Break Podcast YouTube: Youtube.com/TheCommercialBreak Email: [e-mail] A Chartable Top 100 Comedy Podcast #1 Trending Comedy Podcast Worldwide! (Chartable) #1 Trending Comedy Podcast U.S.(Chartable) An Apple Top 100 Comedy Podcast  Top 1% Downloaded Podcasts, Worldwide (ListenNotes) A Hot 50 Podcast (Podcast Magazine) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

And welcome back to WSHIT, Crab Apples Only, Public Access Station. Every Sunday afternoon, we like to spend an hour of our programming helping those youngsters right out of school find that new career. Today's focus is on Robert Griffins, son of course of Bob Griffins from Bob Griffins used tire and tentric massage center located on 5th and Walnut Street. Let's all watch Robert put his best foot forward on this week's edition of Video Resume. Hi, my name is Robert Crafe and I am a student here at Miller's Full University. When I am...

Oh my... Hi, my name is Robert Crafe and I'm a student here at Millersford. Hi, my name is Robert Crafe and I am a TechEd major here at Millersford University. Hi, my name is Robert Crafe. I am a TechEd major here at Millersford University and I am not attending school. I spend most of my time riding a BMX bicycle or working for my dad. Well done young man. The future is bright for this one indeed. Robert can be reached at 4123422. I'm sure he won't last long on the job market so pick him up while you can.

WSHIT will be right back after this commercial break. On this episode of the commercial break. Hello, did you watch the video? I did. You did? Yeah, that's a little. It's a pretty fantastic call. It's an interesting video.

Yeah, it is. He's swinging down a sex pole all the way down into hell. Now he's putting blood in the shoes is what's going on? So he'd be a thousand pairs of what look like Oh, six six six. Oh, he's selling him for a thousand dollars. They sold those out in a minute Oh, yeah, I'm sure In a minute what a smart fucking move by this guy. Yeah, what a smart fucking move by the way He's gonna sell a million albums. We should go full Satan on this show, I feel like. So speaking of social media and YouTube,

we have been just ripping up the internet with our content. I don't know any other way to put it, but people are super impressed with the Teresa Caputo episode, which we all seem to really be in love with. Go fuck yourself! Jesus doesn't love you. Oh really, Jesus doesn't love you. Now I get some hate now.

Man, we got a lot of people responded. I said it before and I touched the third rail comedy podcasting Tareesa Caputo. Someone had commented, Brian is a balding blowhard, right? And then someone else replied, Brian is a balding blowhard, right? And then someone else replied, Brian is a balding blowhard would be a knock to blow. Balding blowhard. I feel like that's probably correct. Yeah.

The next episode of the commercial break starts now It never gets old the dolphin never gets old If you're a swam what dolphins? No, but I would like to the highly fascinating thing to do I mean I feel bad that they're caged in these little and we went to a place in Jamaica or was it Jamaica or was it a Ruba went to a place in a ruba was it Jamaica, or was it a rubah? We went to a place in a rubah, where they had them like, they were in an ocean pen. Yeah. So they put, they string this big net around them,

so they've got like, I don't know, like a, a round mile that just hang out in, and these creatures are, they're incredibly powerful little dudes. They are, they're smart. Yeah, and then they got to jump around like a bunch of monkeys for a whistle, for a fucking fish. I feel like dolphins are one of those creatures that could probably take over the earth if the water just keeps on creeping up

They're gonna be like sweet revenge Right I'm Brian this is Chrissy and happy Commercial break another episode I just wanted you to know that while I do have shoes on they have no human blood in them whatsoever Oh, that's good. Did you hear in about this guy, that guy nods, who did the, what was it? What was it? I'm on a ride my front shoulder, old time roll, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go was like, God damn this song sucks, like it really does. Who's the guy?

Billy Ray Joe, Joe Ray Cyrus. Yeah, Billy Ray Cyrus, and Miley Ray Cyrus. It's Dalper's doing wonderful things for girls all over the earth. Yes. He, that's like his most famous song ever. Even though he had that chat of who down on the chat. Hootie, yeah, get down to the hootie.

That's not that talent Jackson. Oh, that's Ellen Jackson. Oh, I know. Billy Ray was the... I just used to be on a classic country station in of that's Alan Jackson. Yeah, I know Billy Ray was the I just used to be on a classic country station in the middle of the night. What do I know? I know about classic country Billy Ray Cyrus and this guy nods. What do I know? I know fucking thing. Billy Ray Cyrus and his and his good friend, Nas had this incredible hit. They had a billion and a half views, what billion and a half and counting views on this damn song

that played everywhere forever, forever. And then now he's out with his new album, the Nas is the guy, the gentleman that sings with Billy Ray Cyrus. And he went full Satan. He went full Satan on this album. I watched the video the other day. Now, just on cue, like as if you're pulling the strings

of a fucking puppet, everybody in the conservative media is up in arms because clearly we're teaching our children how to be Satanists and the whole world is going to crumble. You know, never mind the guy. Never mind the guys up on the, you know, storming the doors of the Capitol, screaming, hang mic pens. You know, the gay black doors of the capital, screaming hang mic pens, you know. Right. The gay black satanist is clearly gonna have

a bad influence on our children. And I think it's the most ridiculous thing ever. And I think it's such a smart move by Nause. Absolutely. This has been going on at, at, at, at infinite item. These, this, this happens like every 15 years. It's cyclical. And what happens is, people get, uh, get all scared

because they think some big satanist cult is running around, you know, sacrificing children. And and really what it is it's just a game of telephone some idiots started telling some tales some time and now the news media picks up on it yeah throws gasoline on the fire and then all the sudden we got to talk about this for you know fucking 14 weeks you know the truth is if you really wanted it to go away don't talk about it that's the thing that you do but they get all upset you You know, Nisk, I shot over.

Big fucking blow hard. Shut your pie hole. Cares. Cares if he's swinging down a pole. However, did you watch the video? I did. You did. Yeah, that's pretty fantastic. Yeah, it is. He's swinging down a sex pole all the way down into into hell. Now he's putting blood in the shoes. Right. Is what's going on? So he'd be a thousand pairs of what look like. No, it's 666. Oh, 666. Oh, he's selling him for a thousand dollars. They sold those out in a minute.

Oh, yeah, I'm sure. In a minute. Look at all the hype. Look at all the hype. Look at all the hype. Look at all the hype. Look at all the hype. Yeah.

What a smart fucking move by this guy. He really is. Mm-hmm. He's gonna sell a million albums. We should go full Satan on this show. I feel like. I think I have some devil ears from a costume. No, I'm talking like, you know, wee-ji board. Oh, yeah.

We should do- I love the old wee-ji board. Yeah, we should get a wee-ji board, which most, you know, some people- I consulted. My wife won't even allow me to do a wee-ji board in this house, by the way. She won't.

Oh, okay. Yeah, I told her, I said, we need a wee-ji board for the show, because we're going to do some stuff, and she's like, I don't want that shit anywhere in my house. Got it. Yeah. And I was like, how am I gonna do a bit with the Ouija board if I can't even bring the Ouija board inside the threshold of the door?

And she's like, I just don't want it staying at the house. You can bring it in, but I don't want it here at the house. Yeah. Because I think she, it feels like it creeps her out. But I think we should just go full Satan. Maybe I'll bring some Salmon Rushd over and we'll just start reading verses of Satanic Bible out loud. I bought that.

Sounds like a riveting podcast episode. I can't be worse than some of the ones that we do. Like some of the ones that we record to no one and then just, you know, I'm sorry about that by the way. Yeah, but really sorry. For the 26th time in the history of the commercial break, Brian forgot to press record. And so we've wasted yet another hour of our lives here in this fucking studio. When I was 13 years old, I managed to convince my father to allow me to buy the Satanic verses by Salman Rushdie, which I was so, you know, at 13, I was so fascinated

by all the bullshit, you know, Satan, so cool, so fascinating. You know, I'm done with the devil, Metallica, Megadeth, all that of the stuff. But I would probably fail to understand that the book was six and a half thousand pages long and really had very little to do with, with Satan. What's so funny was like just some musings by Salman Rushdie who's a rather strange guy. www.tcbpodcast.com is where you can go. You can read all the show notes, find our entire media library there, and you can contact us right through the website at the commercial break on Instagram.

If you'd like to follow us on Instagram, we push out content there daily. You can DM us for any reason whatsoever, just send us a message right there. Or you can reach us on Clubhouse at T.C.B. Chrissy at Brian Green, B.R.Y.A.N.G.R-E-E-N, and you can join the commercial break club or the comedy podcast club if you want to hear more about us or join our live shows, which we're starting next week. So, we're going to do some shows inside of Clubhouse. If you need an invite and you have an iPhone, YouTube can be sucked into the time that the time suck that is clubhouse.

There's gonna be a room one of these days. It's gonna be a club for divorcees of clubhouse because it's really addictive. Like once you get started, it's hard to get off and you can just get lost in a rabbit hole for hours and hours and hours. And I mean, I imagine most social media is like this, but I don't know.

It seems like clubhouse feels to me. Like there's a lot of people like wasting a whole fucking bunch of time on that. Do you think Frankie is on there? Who? Franky. Franky. Franky.

Ah! Frank B is probably on there because he's trolling for 50-year-olds. Yes. Yeah, he's 70, so that's in his range, isn't it? Case you don't know, check out Franky Frank Bagnardo's YouTube channel for all things over 50 style, fashion, sex, working out testosterone low P high P Your prostate bothering you Get pop up. What's this song? Let's find his song ready?

Where's Frankie's song? Man, I wish I had it right here Now I think I actually took it off here Frankie P's song, but he has this, oh here it is, ready? Listen. ["The Last of Us"] If you wanna get a hot o'clock now, you gotta watch my videos. Remember to like and subscribe.

He does the one thing in fucking YouTube that you're not supposed to do, and that's spend eight and a half minutes talking about liking and subscribing before you even get to the content I feel like you know He's like if you if you if you stumbled upon my channel and you find this interesting no one stumbles upon your channel Frankie they go there because of the high quality high entertainment value the solid content that you're giving people on how to be a Dushbag over 50 years old. He is the world's biggest cock-knocker.

I wish he would come on the show. I really do. I really do. So speaking of social media and YouTube, we have been just ripping up the internet with our content. I don't know any other way to put it, but people are super impressed with what we had. We had the Teresa Caputo episode, which we all seem to really be in love with. Go fuck yourself! Jesus doesn't love you. Oh really, Jesus doesn't love me.

Yeah, I get some hate mail. Man, we got a lot of people responded. I said it before. And nervous. I touched the third rail comedy podcasting Teresa Caputo. I mean, we've talked about so much shit on this. How are people watching Teresa Caputo too and listening to our watching our YouTube channel? I don't know. I think there's a crossover audience.

Well, I mean, yeah, maybe Teresa Caputo is one of those people that like you can even be a decent human being and listen to, but there is certainly some crossover because there are people that have hated on this, but you know what? Not, Teresa Caputo is not the only reason to hate on us. There's lots of reasons to hate this. I feel like we've done kind of a miserable job

of putting our social media together now. Blindly. Blindly throwing it together. Yeah, we throw up some pictures on occasion. Now Astrid has done a good job of tightening it up over the last couple of months. Astrid's amazing. I'm talking about us.

We are doing everything. I mean, we can't even record a show. Let alone get on Instagram. This, we went from 86 followers on Instagram to almost 500 followers on Instagram, in short order, but it has nothing to do with Chrissy and I has everything to do with Astrid and her hard work. And so I feel like we could probably use an extra set of hands.

An expert. Yeah, an expert. So I have a couple of comments that I want to review with a social media expert. His name is Jeff Dawoskin from the live from Jeff Dawoskin show. One of my favorite new comedy podcasts. Hey Jeff, how are you? Let's bring them in. Hey buddy, how are you? Hey, how are you? Live from Detroit, the Jeff Dawoskin show. Is it, well, live, do you, do you hate now that people have to say live from Detroit? It's a Jeff DawosWoskin show, or would you just rather than call it the Jeff D'Woskin show? Well, that's when I know, and I'm being famous, like,

share. When you just drive the live. When they're like, oh, the Jeff D'Woskin show. In the meantime, the live from Detroit is sort of that, oh, I bet, oh, it's sort of live. Well, no, that's in New York, but maybe it's a kind of humorous thing. Because who's Jeff D'Woskin would be the question

most people would be asking themselves. The quri-wile. I want to tell a story a really quick for a moment. And when Jeff and I first met, he was on a Zoom conference that I put together for PodFest Global. And there was one other person on this Zoom. It was me, Alison, one other person in Jeff.

And Jeff pops in halfway through, right? And Alison and I both at the same time are like, it's Jeff Daweskin, because we knew Jeff Daweskin, and he was like, how do you guys know me? I don't, I didn't even know anybody listen to my show. It was one of those things, I was like pretty sure they thought I was someone else.

I just had happened to be dancing around the comedy podcast category, and I listened to to your show and I liked it very much But one of the things you also provide for your listeners is you provide some real Social media help in the form of the social media minute So I felt like Chrissy and I suffering so much to just find our way through the social media category We have one platform. It's Instagram and we do a job at that. We have to have someone else do that for. For time. Yeah, every time she posts my wife takes it down, she's like, nope, not gonna do that. When we also get a lot of haters, Jeff, this is a thing that's been going on. We have a lot of haters to the commercial break. I

guess that means that, you know, we must be doing something right? We're clear. Yeah, that people care enough to listen and leave a comment. I'll read you a few of them and you tell me how you feel about it as the social media expert. Sounds good. The first one comes from one of our social media accounts. I think it's Instagram and it says, Brian, Brian is, someone had commented,

Brian is a balding blowhard, right? And then someone else replied, Brian is a balding blowhard, right? And then someone else replied, Brian is a balding blowhard would be a knock to blow. Balding blowhard. It's... I feel like that's probably correct. Yeah. I feel like when I'm giving balding blowhard

a bad name. Yeah, that's, I mean, clearly they, the good news is they're thinking about you. The good news is they have an opinion of you. You know, I mean, it's like, so it's better than nothing. My, I think like the best way to handle those things is just run right into it. Like just go with it.

Just go with it. Just go with it. Because what you can do, you're not gonna gonna convince him you're not a blow-art. Right. That's what they think. So you might as well just go for it. So. So.

Should I put a picture of my balding head up? I'm just here. Go ahead and fix this. I mean, here's the thing. Is that it's such a territory that I don't understand. Social media, like I don't understand how to interact. I feel like my natural inclination is to be a smart ass back to them.

But I also understand that that in and of itself can cause get another round of drama, right? And go ahead. Yeah, no, no, you're gonna go down the pit of despair when you do this. So you have to kind of look at it as like you're entering your own segment or thing. The things you kind of kind of look at it as like you're entering your own segment or thing. The things you kind of kind of keep in mind with trolls.

One, 95% of them likely wearing plaid. I don't know why, but it's just, it's just, it's just a fact. I love it. It's just a fact. 85% of women, which don't make up the majority of trolls, likely have their hair crimped, non-ironically. Oh, cramped. Non-ironically, that was the important thing there.

I feel like bangs come into play too. Like there's some curled up bang right there. 32% of trolls enjoy CrossFit a lot. Ah! And they're gonna talk a lot about it, so that's a good place to hit it. Now, the important thing they remember about trolls though, is they live in their basement.

You can hit them hard because they love their parents. And why do they love their parents? Because they're the ones paying for the Wi-Fi booster. Right. Right. So, that's the other thing that you can, an easy way to kind of always get back at trolls, is trolls don't understand English language. So to them, you're, you're, you're, I just said

it's all the same thing, right? It's why you are. That means any of them. So that's the first, that's a first indicator that you're dealing with the troll. It's feel right. Right. Exactly. And so I mean, likely another way to know you're dealing with the troll is they're going to hit you with a riddle and not leave cross the bridge. You know, that's another thing. And facts don't matter. That's the important thing to kind of remember. Facts do not matter. And let's be fair to this last commenter. He did get almost all the facts correct. Brian is a boulding blowhard. My name, boulding and blowhard are all correct. Right, right. And unlikely he was had just eaten a billy goat. So there's a lot of a lot of things to kind of keep in mind there. So when you, uh, so let me, let me read a couple more here

because I'm Chrissy and I can, we can have a discussion internally about this too. We'll also, we'll talk about that in a certain whole meeting. talk about internal meeting. Here's a podcast comment from, I think it's one of the podcasts publishers. It said, I hope this, I think this woman is secretly crying out for help or she being held hostage. And I so want to respond to that. I know.

What, what you have a big Twitter following, don't you? I do, yes. How many people do you have following you on Twitter? It's around 43, 44,000. Holy shit, 43,000. That's right. We have 423 Instagram followers and I'm super proud of that.

I only have 2,000 Instagram followers. Okay. That's what I'm super proud of that. I only have 2,000 Instagram followers. Okay. That's a big one for us. I'm not huge. It's just like, you know, it's there. I feel like whenever anybody has over 500, I feel impressed by their account. I'm like, wow, that's really good.

Congratulations to you. What, how do you amass 40,000 Twitter followers? And how much of that is hate? How much is back and forth do you get hate wise? Do you engage the trolls or do you just sit back and watch it roll in? It depends like sometimes Sometimes like if I'm not in the mood to deal with the troll then I won't tweet something just because I don't want to get in the in the in the thing when I became verified

Twitter got verified on Twitter so that's that's that blue check So that's how you know I'm Jeff to watch They go about determining that well, I used to write for the Huffington post so that made me famous enough Well, I used to write for the Huffington Post, so that made me famous enough too. Wait, I didn't know that. Oh, did I bury the lead? No, he didn't. No, it's not that. It's not that.

It's not that. And next up, we have Josh Smith from Bright Bar Media is going to come in and tell us about his Twitter account. So when I had, like,uffPost Media in my bio, and you may be familiar with some of my HuffPost work, how to explain the Kermit and Miss Piggy break up to your parents, with one of my more famous ones. What?

Why did, how did you get writing for the Huffton, having to boast? Did someone just approach you? They had like a blogger type thing and so you could, you know, know, I did it for a while then they ended the program. So as I hung out with some people that I'd met on Twitter and they worked,

they were high up at the Huffington Post. So that kind of just worked out. So that's, you know, I feel like, I feel like we're in the early stages of a manship, like a man friendship, him and Jeff and I. And I feel like that's something he would lead of a man ship, like a man friendship, him and Jeff and I, and I feel like that's something he would lead with. Like, you should lead with that.

I used to write for the Huffington Post, and I just hear him about it right now. So I imagine a lot of those followers came from, they like what you're producing on the Huffington Post, so I'm gonna follow you. I don't know, you know, the only thing it ever really, I don't know, I don't know if they ever read it or not. It's one of those things.

The one thing that the Huffington Post got me that was the coolest thing to this day. There was like one week four years ago that I was a very sought after influencer on social media. This is one week for me. Within one week. But this was a good week. Within this week, I got a free coffee maker, so that was cool.

Wow. The people who don't give those out for free anymore. So, timing wise, if you watched The Walking Dead, this was the episode. Yeah. It was about, they were about to introduce Negan. They sent me, AMC sent me a replica of Lucille, that's his bat. No way.

When I'm telling you, it was the case, the case that it came in was cooler than the bat itself. Okay. And so, so I got that. And then Gillette had said, hey, do you want a razor, a Star Wars razor? And I said, sure, do you want a razor, a Star Wars razor?

And I said, sure, I'll take a razor. And then it's like a Thursday and they're like, you know what, actually, would you be able to come to London next week? Like Tuesday, we want you to come to Pinewood Studios. We have a Rogue One, these are, you can understand the timeframes by the movies and stuff I'm talking about.

We're doing a Rogue One event at Pinewood Studios in London and Like do we do want to come like sure We flew Virgin air it was like business class. It was really nice They set you up they had a driver it was like It was like business class. It was really nice getting back. Oh my God. They set you up. They had a driver. It was like, it was really cool. Oh my God.

He don't want to my most- I'm thinking of Girline, right? Yeah, me too. I'm like, now I feel like my friend is really cool. Like, before he's just a dude that I knew, and I'm like, ah, hey, hey, did you hear about my rogue one, dude? This life is a virgin business class. He got that, that's where they give you as much

water as you want. So there's I did write an article about it in the Huffington Post, but the it was really cool though because you got you could only take pictures in the event though. The food was amazing, but you could only take pictures anywhere outside of Pinewood Studios in London where they filmed every movie possibly think of. You weren't allowed to take any pictures at all. But that was cool. We did the eye, you know, the thing where it's like a big, big, big, big, big, big Ferris wheel.

Yeah. This scares the shit out of you. We have one of those here in Atlanta too. The view's not so great. You're seeing the side of a building and the, where the Atlanta, the Olympic Park bombing happened. You're like, were they covered the bones of the dead people? So, the burned the flesh of the people who passed away, by the only one person died. So, let me ask you a question. Why was it that you were so sought after as because you simply were

on the Huffington Post? Well, I think they wanted me meet her right in article and then about the event in Gillette. And then so that was that. The other things was just on Twitter, I think they just, I must have just caught someone's attention for like the content. Oh, not it. So that's all we need to do, Brian. Let's submit some stuff to the Hefefner news. I want to, let me tell you a couple stories about the commercial break.

We got an email the other day that said we think you'd be a perfect fit for our brand new supplement program and for $120 we're gonna send you the first month and you can tell all your listeners about it and if you get four other people to sign up you're gonna make a thousand dollars next month and they did not offer to fly me anywhere but nonetheless they did reach out to me dear Dear Sir is what it said. They have a certain appreciation for me. They're, I think that's great. That's great.

What happens? It's almost as good as going to Pinewood Studios. It's almost. It's right, I feel. We have a Pinewood Studios right here in Atlanta. Okay, yeah, we're not, we're not, we're not. However, they do not let us in Pinewood Studios. That's not what I'm saying.

They don't just invite us down for a party. That is so fucking cool. And so when did you stop writing for them? It's been a while. It's been a couple of years, because they shut down the whole comedy section and then the whole thing. And they were bought and then re-bought. And so it was, but it was fun while it was doing it.

You know what I mean? My first article I wrote was, everything I know about the bachelor based on random tweets I'm seeing while it's airing. Here's the stuff. And it was like, oh, we're big fans of the bachelor here at the commercial break. Oh my God. You mean we watch it. What a shit show that is.

Past year. If you've ever seen an episode of the bachelor, you just read the tweets about it. You know, I didn't, I think I might have watched more of the Bachelor's the RET. I remember watching like the last two episodes of the, of the first time the girl really got screwed and then ended up on dancing with the stars. I don't remember.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I don't remember her name, but I cause I never remember any of their names because quite frankly, I have for the shows over, no one remembers their fucking names. They never get married, they never stay married, they just become... I think Trista from Wayback is like the only one. Trista, she is the only one I think that made it through Got married and I think they're still married.

Oh they are? Yeah. And how long ago is this? That's like from season two or three. Yeah, that was a lot of time ago. They're on 22. Holy shit. I know. What's up to us? Because I have a new level of respect for you, my friend.

I had very little and now I have some. Like my erection, my respect for you is growing, my friend. Let me ask you a question. I just want to throw in a dick joke there. I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really,

I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, I really, really, I really, really, I really, really, I really, really, I really, I really, really, really, I really, really, I really, I really, really, I really, really, I really, really, really, really, I really, really, I really, really, I really, really, I really, really, I really, I really make you feel comfortable. Let me tell you about my friend, Dane Cook. Dane Cook one's responded to one of my tweets. Anyway, yeah, it was yeah, long time ago, but like, you got that's a whole story. That's it. I got so excited because I got on Twitter, Jeff has taken notice to my Twitter account because it had three people that are following me and I'm one of them. My guy have another Twitter account and I follow myself.

I think I follow you. Okay, then you too. So now we've identified all three, but I went on Twitter. I had no idea what I was doing. Yeah, my first tweet got liked by Seth Rogan or no, my first reply to a tweet got liked by Seth Rogan. And then again, a couple of weeks later, by Seth Rogan. I was like, oh my God, Seth Rogan, but I'm not sure he had the blue check mark.

So I gotta go back and check that out. If it's, I have a funny Seth Rogen story, but if it's Seth Rogen, 0126789, it's not Seth Rogen. That's not Seth. No, no, no, it's Seth Rogen B slash D dollar sign, 334. Okay, so here's a funny story. So I, about handling trolls. So I have a, I used to have a website called Observed Comedy, and I, but the Twitter property

still lives absurd news, no you. And so it was, it was originally just meant because I was really at the point at that time into writing kind of a joky headlines because for some reason I kept getting these writing opportunities for people that wanted to do monologues. So I ended up I was like oh I enjoy this so I started this site and so one day I wrote Seth Rogan set to write and star in his own version of Charlie Brown okay for whatever reason okay but I spelled Seth Rogan's name wrong. And for the ROGAN.

It was either the hangout, I'll tell you exactly how I spelled it wrong. And then I, oh, and then also just as a, for the book end for all your listeners, Aiki Breakie Heart was the song you were trying to think of. Aiki Breakies. Yes, yes. No, not in my heart.

So, I spelled it Seth Rogan ROGIN Okay, so they started attacking me They started attacking me, okay, and so what I did is my way I responded was I went and created an account Called at Seth Rogan spelled it wrong like I spelled it in my tweet and the bio of it was you know working on my new film a live action Charlie Brown and then I took that that Twitter and started using that Twitter to respond to the other people why are you trying to ruin my movie why are you trying to sabotage me? So good. That was how I handled that.

Did it shut them down? No, no, because these people don't care. No, that was shit. Yeah, these trolls. Listen, I figure, I mean, I think we were talking, Jeff and I were in Clubhouse last night. I think we're talking about this. When someone is hate listening to you,

they're probably listening to you longer than the people who actually like you. Yes. It's just like when you get, you know, you, I mean, no offense to anybody, but it was just like sometimes when you turn on your alternative media source, whether that be Fox News or Alphington Post or whatever you're into. Right. And then you start, you go on this rabbit hole for an hour, screaming and yelling at the top of your lungs.

You're so fine, I was like, a fucking iron, right? Yeah. Because we are engaged in the things that we dislike just as much as we engage in the things that we did, that we like. It's kind of fucking in the things that we did that we like It's kind of fucking fighting. It's all the same right and so I feel like when we're getting hate comments It means that we're doing something right that also means that there are people out there now I have to say that do you ever take offense to the hate comments? Do you ever feel the ever take it personally? Or are you at the point now? We're like I don't give a shit what you have to say

I think it's just like anything. It depends what mental state you're in when you read it. Yeah, I agree with you. 100%. Like if you're really like, you know, feeling good about yourself, but I've had people attack me where it could ruin me for a day or something like that. I don't let that show in my interaction with them, but me personally. And then my wife would know because she would say something like,

what do you want for dinner? I'm like, what the fuck? What the fuck? For dinner? And she's like, oh, did someone bother you on Twitter? Yeah. Here's my response. What do you want for dinner, honey?

I don't care. Whatever. Is everything okay? I guess. I'm gonna guess. Everything fine. Recall to me of all theding blowhard on Instagram again. They did like my Theresa Caputo bit.

But sometimes there's, if I'm in a mood, well, here's the thing. One of the things, we're having such a large account is myself. And I don't mean anything by that, but you have to handle trolls differently when you're a large account. And what I mean by that is sometimes

People will say something to me to get me to respond and when I respond I'm exposing them right which could be like a Win for them. Yeah, so what well it's a win and plus I give them exposure to 40,000 people because I'm responding. So I 40,000 people because I'm responding. So I generally will ignore a lot of things. Now sometimes if I'm in a mood and I just want to cycle down, you know, if I got a time, like I got about an hour, I can do this. There's this old Brian Tracy thing that I learned.

He's a motivational speaker. Oh, yeah. And so there's a technique, and the technique is when you're talking to someone, you say, oh, wait, I should have what this night didn't prepare this. It's, oh, okay. They're saying something. If you want to get the other person to keep talking, okay?

Okay. They say, oh, you know, how do you mean? You just say, how do you mean? How do you mean? And then when they respond and go on and on and on because you're just like hearing their voice, and then you just respond back with, how do you mean exactly?

Right? Right? And you literally, the game is, and you can do this, Exhaust them. Do this at a party, like when you're at a party, just because the person talking, likely just wants to hear their own voice,

all they hear is a trigger to keep talking. You toggle those two sentences back and forth, and the game is how long before they figure out the game. I love it. I'm so gonna try that. I had a similar game that I would play in relationships of mine. I had a very volatile relationship with a tiny little woman

who would throw things around my apartment and screaming yell at me. And so after a while, no matter what I said, if she was going to continue to lose her shit, that was just her personality. She had a very short fuse and she went on forever. A Chrissy here knew her well. But what I got into was, I got into saying, I hear you and I'm holding space for that. And she would just like, it would send her into a different level and I would just keep

on repeating that until she left the house or set things on fire. But I'd be like, I hear you. And I'm holding space for that. It's my Buddhist way of saying, go fuck yourself woman. Do I ask, and do I ask, let me ask you one additional. Well, so when you have, when you have 426 Instagram followers, would you consider that a large account or are growing? What would you could? I like to say growing. You have to look at like your engagement because you know, I feel like like I don't get a good engagement on my Jeff DeWask and show Instagram, you know, I mean, it's okay. You know, it depends. The same thing about

podcasting. Yeah. And so yeah,, so it's, it really just depends. Like, I get more engagement on my smaller personal account, probably than I do on the big one. I'm a bigger show. So really that's what's important. It's the quality of the followers. That's true. That's true.

I did followers or quality, I got a quality assholes. If you ask me, I feel like, yeah, we get a fair amount of engagement on the commercial break show. I certainly get a lot more on my own personal account, which I've now opened up, because my wife said, you have to be, you, the commercial break is fine,

but people don't interact with Apple. They wanna interact with the designer of the iPhone. That's who they wanna interact with, or they don't wanna to interact with whatever Charlie Brown the movie, they want to interact with Seth Rogan, right? That's who they want to interact with. So you got to make sure that you're doing something over on Brian Green.

So I occasionally take a weird picture of myself and both said, I just don't know how to do it. I wish I was better at social media, but I'm just not. I'm catching onto the clubhouse thing, but the social media, not so much. I have to tell the listeners that Jeff Dawoskins has become a friend of mine in short order.

He has a fantastic podcast called Live From Detroit. It's Jeff Dawoskins. Some of his guests are really good. It's outrageous. You just like, you bring in some of the most random people that you never knew you wanted to hear from and you wanna hear from them, like John Candy's daughter. Or Jackie the joke man.

Or the comedy's control. Yeah. It's harder. That's right. And he has really done a great job with that podcast. It's one of our new favorites. Jeff, I hope you'll come back on and visit us soon and bring us more solid tips

on the social media and how we can groom our growing account. Actually, yeah, and then if you listen to my next episode, the one coming out on Easter Monday, it's how to get followers because my guest is Jesus Christ. How do you mean? You almost got me. I was just like, what are you doing? I knew I couldn't make it one day without a dick or a dain-joke. A dain-cook joke. I'll tell my dain-cook story in a book that's coming up soon. Jeff, we love you. Thanks so much. We appreciate it. Oh, thanks for having me. It was a blast.

Thank you, sir. Alright, that's Jeff Dwarfskins live from Detroit. It's Jeff Dwarfskins. I feel like Jeff is such a nice guy, but he's disarmingly funny. And when you listen to the podcast, you'll find out why I think he's one of the better interviewers in the comedy podcast game is because he lets people go, right?

Yeah, totally. He doesn't get in their way. And I can't shut my fucking mouth for two seconds. So I feel like when I interview somebody, I'm always stepping on top of him like I guess I'm the better I guess I'm different just like listen to me. Where's Frank's song? I get right now What are you doing? No, I got a better story. Dinkook, dinkook, dinkook, dinkook, dinkook, dinkook, it was in clubhouse

But wait I feel like I have too much testosterone going on. But Jeff just kind of lets it, he relaxes the whole situation and then people start talking. Yeah. If you have, I'm assuming that some people are going to now jump over and listen to Jeff show and I would highly suggest that if you have any, even a remote interest in comedy or stories from some about some great comedians, go listen to the Jackie, the joke man, Martening episode. He used to be a former Stern writer for many, many years.

He's kind of a guy who like he was always, he was always in the right place at the wrong time. Or he was in the right place with the wrong decisions. The guy absolute, he was like, I think somebody else said this the other day. Maybe it was Jeff that said this to me. He's like a guy who was like, Hey man, you wanna invest in my startup company? And, well yeah, what is it? It's Apple computers and he's like,

no, I'm a tandy guy. I don't want anything to do with Apple computers, right? You know, he was there at those moments and then he just fucked it all up. That's, or he wasn't into it or he didn't have the foresight to see. And we all know somebody like that. Like a lovable loser.

Yeah, just someone, not even dumb. Just like, oh man, oh, shucks. He left the Stern Show one year before Stern announced his contract to Sierra Sram, or Jackie probably would have gotten the payday that he was desiring so much. If you're a Howard Stern fan, you'll know that so much. So I wanted to let you know that I actually, I was online the other night. Have you, you know the flat earthers, right?

Yeah, okay, so I was online the other night and I found a whole store dedicated to flat earth shit. Do you wanna go through some of this stuff real quick? Sure. Or do you want, okay, I'll give you a choice. Here, I'll give you a choice. Do you wanna play orgasm or animal or do you wanna go through flat or shopping? want to play orgasm or animal? Yeah.

Okay let's play a quick round of orgasm or animal because I feel like people get into that at home. Here is how we do it. Okay you're ready. Let me set up the let's set this up real quick and yep there we go. Okay. Oh you like that music? Yeah do. Yeah okay I want to put it on replay and then so that way I don't have to do it all the time There we go, okay? Bipipipipipipip do. I do have it written down. I know. Okay. Last night I found a website where they have tens of thousands of orgasms, just the audio of the orgasms that are being cataloged by a German sexologist for people to listen to to find out what it sounds like when two people are really having sex,

not a porn version, but the real people. Masterbating, having sex, giving each other Felicio. Felicio, that sounds so funny to say. Felicio, Felicio. So, okay, so you're ready, you wanna hear this? Okay, here we go. I'm gonna give you an example, okay? Shp, listen to this one.

Hi. Hi. Wait. Is that an orgasm or is that an animal? There were two different. It's the same thing. It's in there in the same vicinity, but they're going back and forth.

Oh, these are two. Yeah. Well. Hi. No, it's one noise. Oh, these are two. Yeah. Well, no, it's one noise. It's one thing happening. There's one thing happening. Is that Norgasm or is that an animal? I mean, I'm gonna go with an animal. That is an animal.

That's too sheep that are talking to each other. Okay. Okay. Are you ready to want another one? Hi. Here. Hi. Hi.

Hi. Imagine if, I feel like that's that girl who I'd sex with. It's not like the turkey. Hi. Hi. Okay. You ready? One another one. This is an example. Give a new example and then we'll get on to the show. Okay. Or get on to the game. Okay. That's an animal. Okay, that's an animal. Clearly that's an animal. Alright, one more. Is that animal or is it an orgasm? It's an animal.

It's an animal. Okay, so all three of those were animals, but here we go. Okay. animals, but here we go. Okay, orgasm or animal, you tell me. Broom. Broom. Broom. Animal. Nope, that's an orgasm.

Really? That is an Asian woman having an orgasm using a vibrator. Okay. Just thought it, let you know that in case you wanted playing along at home. Okay, ready? Broom. Broom.

Animal. That's an animal, that's correct. Okay. Good job. All right. Ready? She's an animal. That's an animal. That's right. That is a dog. Okay. There's a dog also having an orgasm. Oh no. No, no, no, no, I'm kidding. That's not the secret. That's, that also sounds like someone I used to date. Ah! Ah!

I think she was screaming at how small it was. Okay, ready? Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Okay, here we Okay. Ah! Ah! Ah! Okay, here we go, ready? Boi!

Boi! I'm gonna go orgasm. That is an orgasm, that is correct, that is an orgasm, that is actually a man. Listen to this again. Boi! Boi! Boi!

Boi! Boi! I feel like he was like, as he was exploding, he was exploding. Oh, hey now. Okay, ready? Yeah, I'm gonna go animal that is an animal that is a dog. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, This cat goes oh Again someone I dated That is an orgasm that's it Yeah, that's an orgasm that's right. I feel like you did good there I think you got I by my count you got three of four three of five right all right and

One more you ready? Okay. Yeah. Booy, booy, booy, booy, booy. I'll go orgasm. That is an orgasm! Good job, ho, they. Nice work, guys, a fun game, we'll play. That's a fun game.

I feel like we're gonna play that one again, but I'm gonna get it a little bit more in depth. I wish I had more time to play with it last night, and I feel like I could have really made it a lot of fun. We could do orgasm or whatever, orgasm or animal, orgasm or car, orgasm or stoplight, orgasm or orgasm, we could just play orgasm or 30 or 33 willy song.

Ah. 33 willy song. Oh my God. By the way, I gotta tell you, we talked about 33 penis. We've been talking about it for the last couple days on the show. And someone has come out of the woodwork, claiming that they have a 33 penis. No way.

We have a 33 penis tape that has been burned on to a CD. No way. Now, I do not know who this person is, and I suspected someone that I know that's close to me. That is fucking with me, because they emailed me from an account, 33 penis at gmail.com. Now, I get it, it was April Fools,

and I understand, someone is playing a little game with me. They went through the trouble of making a fucking Gmail account called 33 penis at, actually, it's 33 P9 at, because I don't think they'd actually let you spell out penis on Gmail, but it says 33 penis P9 at, at Gmail. Oh my God. I just got this a couple of days ago.

And now I am highly suspicious about what's going on. It's not you. What did they say? No, I just wanted to make a picture of it. Dear Brian Green of the commercial break is what it said. It said, what email did it go to? It went to my Brian at TCB podcast. Okay. Okay.

And it said, we have a copy of the 33 Willie band tape. It's a live show, right? Live Willy band tape. It's a live show, right? Live show band tape that we have burned on to CD for posterity sake. Pay us $100,000. Well, what it really is. What it said was, you're going to say what I tell you to say on air, or I'm gonna start burning more copies

and releasing them randomly. Right? Someone is fucking with me and I want to find out who it is. What did they say to say? They said to mention this on the show. So I had a real debate about whether or not I even wanted to mention this on the show because I was like, like, is this fun? Is this good natured or is this gonna go down the rabbit hole? P-N-I.

Yeah, of P-N-I, where people are gonna go. I have been watching your FaceTime camera for the last three weeks and I have your actual P9 But you know I just I I wanted to be careful about how much I entertain this whole situation right now See where you think I should see where he goes gonna go nowhere. I want to see I'm gonna go nowhere. It's where it's gonna go. I want to see it. It's gonna go straight into the 33 Willie release party. Where everyone's making fun of me. I already got to deal with US holes online. Now I got to deal with the assholes in person. This is my biggest nightmare. This is like my fear come true. It's that all of the sudden there's gonna be 33 Willie's CDs running all over the place or even worse the other band which was much

worse than 30 33 Willie was pretty bad, but the other band was even worse. And if people, you know, with people hunt down that particular CD, it is one of the, it's out there somewhere. I know. Yeah. I mean, I know it is. I have a tape of it, right? And I have tape of that other band. I have a tape of it right in my room, but 33 willy.

It's out there. It's out there. Hey, I want to thank Jeff Gowaskin from Live with the Choices. Jeff Gowaskin show. He is great. And you must go listen to his podcast. Or take a listen to his podcast.

Now you must go. Follow him on Twitter. Follow him on Twitter. Follow him on Twitter now. Yeah, I'm gonna follow him on Twitter. He actually, he's actually pretty popular on Twitter. And he does these like contests or like hashtag naming conventions

where he's frequently trending on Twitter for a long period of time. Yeah, he's really smart about all this stuff. And I was hoping he would teach us something, he didn't teach us much, except that he used to write for huffington posts and flew private on virgin airlines at the behest of Star Wars Rogue One. How can he not mention that?

I think he needs to come back. He'll be back. We'll get in the bag next month, maybe. Okay, well, listen, I want to thank one more time. I want to thank Zach Efron's people for trying to range yet another appearance. Unfortunately, we were full up with Jeff Dawkins today, so we couldn't fit him in, but you know, maybe next time, maybe next time. We'll let you know. know we'll keep you posted Zac Efron's people That's all I got to say. I love you. I love you Ryan Until next time

The commercial break new episodes on Tuesdays and now Fridays new YouTube clips dropped daily at youtube.com Slash the commercial break visit tcbpodcast.com for access to our entire media library. Follow us at the commercial break on Instagram and join the commercial break club on Clubhouse to join in live recordings. Each episode is written and produced by Brian Green, co-hosted by Chrissy Holtley, with additional content provided by Tina Cano. you