The Commercial Break - We're A Closed Quad!

Episode Date: March 15, 2023

There are so many ways to have a relationship. Poly is just one of them. But one Poly family calls themselves a "Closed Quad" prompting TCB to take a deeper look. Turns out the "Closed Quad" won't tell their children whose father is who....we smell a Maury appearance. Bryan and Krissy are reading a lot about hot teachers sleeping with students Is sleeping with the "professor" still a thing? Teacher of The Year turns out not to be so good at her job MILF Manor is a show you can watch...if you can stomach it Seeking Brother Husband is a new TCB show and Bryan is stoked TCB is starting a new TV show named "Multiple Manor" TLC is Bryan's channel. We all think less of him for it Closed Quad is non-open Poly foursome Bryan is in a closed couple...so don't even ask! The closed quad won't tell their kids who father is who The gang wonders what happens the quad breaks up Are sleepovers over? Why can't Barrett know who his daddy is?!! LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us or leaving a voicemail at: 1.855.TCB.8383 Speak to TCB LIVE by calling 775.TCB.LIVE (1.775.822.5483) Tuesday-Thursday 12pm-5pm EST Watch TCB on YouTube Creator: Bryan Green Co-Host: Bryan Green Co-Host: Krissy Hoadley Written By: Bryan Green Exec Producers: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Content Production & Research: Tina Khano YouTube Producer & Editor: Morgan Please Audio Editing: Christina A. Executive Director: Astrid B. Associate Producer: Gustavo Episodic Contribution: Marianne, Diane, Natalie, Will The Champ, Will D** Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I believe that you have skills that you've learned and God's shown you said tell us how do we deal with this? Well, first of all, you have to boldly acknowledge their existence. Okay, you got to get away from this long, pointy nose, you know, green face, Wizard of Oz flying around in a broom idea. Witches are reality. Matter of fact, our public school system is hiring full blown well-known witches at an alarming rate. this train because when you have a when you can just say, as my wife Astrid we're in a closed quad.

We're in a closed octop lit. What do you think about that? We're a closed couple. That's what I say when I go somewhere. I'm like, this is my wife Astrid and we're a closed couple. Don't even try. The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Yeah, Katsa, get, welcome back to the Commercial Break, I'm Brian Green, this is my dear friend, Anne Coho's, Kristen, joy, oddly, best to you, Chrissy. And best to you, Ryan. And best to you out there in the podcast universe. Have you noticed in the news that there is a, what seems like kind of a, I don't know, an epidemic of rather attractive female teachers

having sex with their students and getting arrested for it. Have you noticed this? Is it just me, am I the only one? No, I did. I saw something about the teacher of the year. Okay, is it just my perverted mind that goes straight to these stories when I'm scrolling across my favorite news site? I think so too.

Yeah. But I also think that it's like, it's kind of a novelty. I still think that society views these things much differently. And I don't know, maybe I do too, in some weird way that, you know, I just think of myself as a 16 year old kid. And I know I don't have any of the facilities to make any of those kind of decisions.

I'm not saying this is right, so please don't misunderstand me. But what I am saying is that 16 years old, there were a couple of hot teachers in my class and had I had the opportunity to have sex with them, I think I would have taken it. Because I would have taken any opportunity to have sex at 16 years old.

I mean, maybe it's just me and my own dispositions and predispositions. I don't know that it would have been all that, like it would have been a big deal to sleep with the teacher, don't get me wrong. But I don't know that it would have been all that like it would have been a big deal to sleep With the teacher don't get me wrong. Yes, but I don't know that 40 years later I would have thought back on it and been like man. I really got I got railroading there But a couple of these stories also include children that are much younger than 16 or 17 years old They're like 12 and 13 years old now that is fucked up. Yeah, that's like well

I mean it's all fucked up, but any it all fucked up. Teachers shouldn't be sleeping with students, period and descendants, including college. Because you know that those professors in college, I knew a guy, a professor, a professor emeritus, or whatever they call him. He had been doing this for lots of years. And his, he had no qualms about telling you how many students he had slept with. about telling you how many students

he had slept with. It was just like a yearly event. New students come in, he'd sleep with him, you know, he'd take him back to his house and on the pretenses of studying, they'd smoke a little pop. I feel like that's a story that's been around for a while. Yeah, well, it's all, yeah, that's what I think. The young girls with the professors.

For the professors, because the professors are, you know, a dad-like figure, right? that's what I'm talking about. The young girls with the professors. For the professors, because the professors are, you know, a dad-like figure. Right. It's not my dad. So intelligent. They're so intelligent and sexy and they smell like musty cigars and floppy jack Daniels. I don't know. But the female teachers with the male students is really what's getting a lot of attention

right now. Teacher of the year. Did you read about this one? Yeah, the teacher of the fucking year. Yeah.. Teacher of the year. Did you read about this one? Yeah, the teacher of the fucking year. Yeah. The teacher of the year. Yeah, and I didn't read the whole story, but it was something like 14 counts. 14 counts. And here's the crazy part is that like, somewhat, the mother called a text message or something within 24 hours she was arrested, released on bail, and then re-arrested 24 hours after that. So you know they had the goods on her.

Like that's a big deal. And this time, the second time, no bail whatsoever. It must have been serious. Anytime that you're having sex with children and then the children under your tutelage, it's a big deal. I mean, you shouldn't be doing this, right? And the kid apparently was young.

He was like 13 years old. But then there's this other story. I think it's not like, maybe it's not a California or something like that. There is a teacher and a mother of a daughter of a 16 year old boy, or 17 year old boy who's now 21. He's in rehab. And as I guess is part of his rehab journey,

he starts telling these stories. Oh, right. He had sex with the mother of his girlfriend who also happened to be his teacher over 300 times, according to his own diary, over 300 times. And you know what she said to the police? Yeah, I might have made a few mistakes. I might have made a couple of them mistakes.

Yeah, no, that's awful. That's awful. That's awful. If for no other reason, then it's your daughter's boyfriend. That's my boyfriend. I know. That's the most fucked apart. It's like that

Milf man or whatever the fuck they got going on TLC right now. Have you seen this? Well, I saw the the preview for it And I immediately thought that you would be watching it. I can't watch it. You drew the line. I drew the line. I can't believe I know the host of the commercial break The brainchild of the commercial break cannot watch Milf man. No, it's too much Well, you said it was involved like a group of women and their son and their sons. And then switching it up. Yes. The sons of the friends are hooking up with the women. I think 12, I'm not sure.

Only watched it like half an hour of the first episode. But I think like 12 single women, uh, middle aged 40s, 50s, and I'm assuming 60s is somewhere in there, just my assumption. I don't really know. But so let's just say middle aged women, all of them fairly attractive, and they all get together in this big house of, you know, the manners. The manner. The fuck is a man. And, uh, what is a man do you want to be over doing to come over to my man or later on today we're going to have some tea and crumpets I know it above the large house. I know I'm gonna stop saying house. I'm gonna start saying man or here at the man or here at the green

man or a so 12 women they move into the house in the first night they're all drinking they know they're going to be on a show like a reality show love island or something along those lines as're all drinking. They know they're going to be on a show, like a reality show, Love Island or something along those lines. So they didn't know what show? They have no, they have no, they have no, they know they're going to be on Milf Man, what they didn't have. And, but they think they're going to be on some reality show, they're bringing a bunch

of strange men. Okay. And then they get to know them and date them and they're going to be eliminated in some way, shape, or form. What ends up happening? That's a surprise. How they do this, how the producers coordinate this without everybody else knowing. Yeah.

I'm calling bullshit on this just a little bit. The producers of TLC are calling the son and the mother at the same time and no one has any idea what's about to happen. No, there's no way. The big reveal is when the single men are introduced, they're the children of these women. Of the other women, yeah. And so now there's a bunch of these, and I'm talking, they're young. They're like, and they're speaking children of these women. And so now there's a bunch of these, and I'm talking, they're young.

They're like, speaking of young children, these guys are kids, they're kids, they're babies, they're fresh faced. I mean, they're so young, and they're supposed to go out and then date the other women, not their moms, obviously. They're other women. It's so fucking strange.

And the only way that I know about any of this is through the commercials and maybe like an outtake here and there at the end of an episode. I cannot for the life of me. Imagine what's going on in the heads of the producers of TLC. It just seems to this takes it way too far. Yeah, I mean, they're grasping it whatever. Whatever. Anything. You know, we talk a grasping it, whatever. Whatever. Anything.

You know, we talk about Marlin a lot on this show. And, you know, I don't wanna come across as ages because I'm not, because I have a huge different age difference with my wife. You have a difference with your husband, and we know plenty of people where this works out just perfectly fine. But the 20 year olds and their mother is in the same house and now they're dating another 40 or 50 year old

It seems to me to just be a little bit too lured. That's just too much. I don't want to sound like you know I don't want to sound like a T totaler here But the thing is TLC's not afraid to cancel a show if it's not working I've seen plenty of shows on TLC that make it like one or two episodes. They never see it again for whatever reason. Yeah. This one keeps trucking and that means that all of you out there are fucked up. Stop your shit. It's a decent for good.

I predict you're going to watch it at some point. I'm not going to watch it. I'm not going to watch it. But what I will watch and what I did hear about last night that intrigued me to no end. We have been over this time and time again here at TCB. Polyamory. It's one of our favorites. Go to have fun with Chrissy and I, no people who are polyamorous. We've seen plenty of polyamory relationships. They're difficult to navigate, but to each the wrong. I have nothing against polyamory. It's not for me, but I've nothing

to do. If it works for somebody else, great. I have a pea-sized brain, and I have a hard time keeping up with one lady. I'm not going for four. And by the way, Astrid is everything I'll ever need. Right? So I'm not looking anywhere else. But now that TLC has seeking sister wives,

which is one of my favorite shows, they have decided they gotta, they gotta balance the scale. No sexism here at TLC because seeking brother, husband is the next new show that TLC has come up with. And I say, yay, sir, yay to you. You can't do that, Jackie Weaver.

Have you seen it? I look him out, yes. It's just a commercial so far. I saw like an extended promo online and I'm already in love with this show. Now if you thought it was hard to have three wives, you know, I mean just think about the minutia of having three wives if you're a gentleman out there that you know hetero gentleman and you're thinking about getting married. Think about getting married to three of those same people. It sounds like an absolute disaster waiting to have complicated way's complicated. Way complicated. And it is because no couple, except for one, on that show seeking sister wives has made

it to a second season. You want to know why? Because it didn't work out. Because it never works out. Bully Emory is like a season. It's a season of life. You know what I'm talking about? Right, right.

But if I thought having three wives was gonna be difficult, imagine having three husbands. So it's one woman? One woman and multiple husbands. Three husbands, wow. My opinion is having thought about this because I never really thought about it until I saw this commercial.

Did you ever think about this? No. You never thought like, there's this kind of situation going, I mean, I'm sure they're it. I guess in my head, I assumed there was, but I never thought like we'd see it on camera, right? If I thought having three wives was difficult,

three husbands has got to be a nightmare of epic proportions. We are small children, we have pea brains, we can't control our penises, we barely think for ourselves. We don't grow up until we're 46 years old. We're lazy, we're messy, we're obnoxious, we're annoying, we're mostly full of shit and Put all that together times four and it just sounds like you're just getting children. That's what it sounds like Yeah, extra children that need to be whacked off every once in a while. Are they all living in one house? They're living in one house. No, wow.

At least with the sister wives thing, they had different homes, right? Yes. Well, I mean, some of them did. Yeah, some of them had, and with the one... Different manners, if you want. Different manners. Multiple manners. Multiple manners.

That's what I'm going to call my next TLC show. Multiple manners. The Astros is going to have a couple husbands. I'll have a couple wives. We, multiple manner. Aster's gonna have a couple husbands, I'll have a couple wives, we'll all live happily together. Yeah, yeah, with the three children in blue. I'm gonna call it multiple manner, and I'm gonna get multiple blues.

I would rather get multiple blues. I would rather have Nico, the smelly, real ghost dog, come back to life and sit on my face for hours on end rather than have multiple husbands. I cannot wait for this show. I'm so excited. Astrid deal last night was like, do you want to come watch the Oscars? And I'm like, I need to see another commercial for seeking brother husbands. Oh my God, God, TLC's your channel for sure.

Oh my God, yeah, TLC is your channel, for sure. I don't know why, but that channel really has me by the balls. Dude, it's everything that they put out is so fascinating to me because I think it's like a character study that I know is mainly manufactured, but it's manufactured in a way that it's good, it's like entertaining, it's mindless. I don't have to pay attention to it. I'm like that with the housewives, so. Okay, so everyone has their guilty pleasure. I've met a lot of people on this earth. And even the weirdest, wildest, most independent,

I don't watch TV, TV's bad for your TV is shit people. Always have some kind of guilty pleasure TV show. Of course. And it usually is of the TLC. Yeah. They hit a home run with this 90 day fiance. I am Sean Array while boring at times is a fascinating character

study into a very unique. What's the update with her? Well, they're not on season right now. So they put together these really short seasons of like nine episodes with her. And I wish they would put together like a 22-second show season. So they dig in a little bit more. Those Johnston's are forever fascinating to me. The other little people, little people big world that's been going on for 25 years. And now they have seeking sister husbands, on top of seeking sister wives.

I mean, could you ask for more? Brother husband. Do you know what you'll find me watching on a Saturday morning sometimes? I don't even know I have been meeting this to the millions of people come to town for this episode. But I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna be the real Brian here.

Four weddings. Four here. Four weddings. Four weddings. Four weddings. You know what four weddings is? No. Okay, here you go. God. Are you ready?

Yes. Are you ready to take your opinion of me down four or five notches? Is it on TLC? I guess, it's on TLC. Of course, okay. And there's like 13 seasons that I'm so happy about it because I can watch it here in the studio

when I'm editing or doing whatever. And I just think it's a lovely show. And it's like 13 seasons that I'm so happy about it because I can watch it here in the studio when I'm editing or doing whatever and I just think it's a lovely show and it's so stupid. It's for women that don't know each other sometimes they do but mainly they don't know each other but they live in the same city they're getting married around the same time. TLC puts them together and then they judge each other's weddings so they all go to the they all go together to the weddings and they judge each other's weddings and the dress and all the caddiness and snarkiness. You can only imagine. But then just watching people from different styles and cultures go and have a wedding. What some people think is interesting.

I mean, the other day they had a wedding on and it was like pirates of the Caribbean theme. There's something like that. They had wenshies and beer stands. I could not imagine under any circumstances in any universe that I would want the women dressed up like wrenches at my wedding, but you know, she literally walked down the aisle with like a boostier and a thing and the vials of these people were just ridiculous. I mean, they were ridiculous.

It was like, arg, I will poke you for the rest of your life. And if you should fall off the ship made here, I'll be in the water to catch up. Hahaha. People were like, oh, it's lovely, isn't it lovely? No, it's not. Torrible. These people are gonna have to look at these pictures

20 years from now. Their kids are gonna go, what the fuck were you thinking, mom and dad? You can't know what it's like. No, I don have to look at these pictures 20 years from now. Their kids are gonna go with the fuck were you thinking? Mom and dad. What is that? No, I don't want my friends to come over. That kind of house. You know, we all had those friends at school where the kids were like,

no, you don't want to come over to my house. It's not. It's even too fucked up even for you. That's what happens when you have the pirates of the Caribbean themed wedding. Probably saying this and there's like 12 people out there are like, I have a pirates of the Caribbean themed wedding. Probably saying this and there's like 12 people out there. I'm like, I have a pirate of the Caribbean themed wedding. I've heard of people having a theme wedding.

What's the most ridiculous theme wedding you've been to? Oh, I haven't been to a theme wedding. You've never been to a themed wedding? No, I haven't been to a themed wedding either. I never have. But I've heard of people doing like Star Wars or Disney or now you mentioned the pirates the Caribbean We came this close to having a Disney wedding. This close to having I can see that you guys love Disney

We did we did and then we decided that our children 20 years from now Probably want to look back on us and go No, we didn't we didn't want to go full Disney Yeah, you don't want to go full Disney. Like you don't want to go full Disney. Remember that movie with Robert Downey Jr. Where he goes, you know, you never go full, whatever. You know what I'm saying? You never go full Disney.

As an adult, you don't want to go full Disney. You don't get married there. Kids birthday? Yeah, that's cool. Awesome, right? Anniversary? Yeah, all right, I go down to Disney. Spring Break, cool.

Marriage, funerals, divorce parties, whatever. You know, I don't know. You're Bob Nitzfah. You probably should do those somewhere else besides Disney World, but people get married there. Oh yeah. Thousands and thousands of them every day. And I wonder how many of these husbands,

we have had so many of these weddings in the Seeking Husband Wipes. Seeking Husband Wife. I wonder how many of these husbands, we have had how many of these weddings are the seeking husband wives. Seeking husband wife. I'm seeking husband wife. The show is not out yet. So of course I can't bring any clips because I don't have any clips to it yet. Okay, but it's good as it's out.

It's as soon as it's out, we'll get to it. And I promise I'll get a few juicy clips. But it made me go troll the internet for comparable content. I was so fascinated and honestly it was really hard to find something comparable because if it's out there at least in my one hour research, I didn't find a lot of video about this. There's some Reddit posts and stuff like that, about having multiple husbands. But what I did find was something I think as kind of on par and equally as fucked up. Okay. I don't care if you're Paulie.

I just want to be clear about this. I'm not judging you, Paulie, Amber. It's just different. Sounds for you. Yeah, it's not for me. And it's different. And I like different things. I like to take a view of different things.

So Chrissy, I was trolling on the internet. As you do. And as I do like to do. T-C-B. Hey you, guess you. I hate to interrupt all the fun, but I just want to remind you that tcbpodcast.com is where you find all the audio and the video, plus you can contact us

to get your free 21EPM sticker. Just go to tcbpodcast.com, hit the contact us button, tell us you want to sticker, drop us your address, and off we go. Plus you can write to us at 855-TCB-8383. That's 1-855-TCB-8383. For all of our international listeners, we'll pick up the toll. Go ahead and text us. If you have comments, questions, concerns, content ideas, we're taking them all at 855-TCB-8383.

If you want to view the commercial break in a whole new light, go to youtube.com slash the commercial break to see the fully edited episodes. You'll love it, or your money back, I promise. While you're at it, hit us up on Instagram at the commercial break and TCB live on TikTok. So let's take a minute to hear from our sponsors and then we'll be back to this episode of the commercial break. T-Z-B. I'm just gonna let the video explain this itself. I don't even... Let me not give a pre-text.

Let me just look at this on its face value. You ready? Yes, I'm ready. Let's just get going here and then we'll figure it out as we go along. We're gonna do this together, Chrissy. Okay. We're all in the adventure together. Here we go. And my boyfriend...

Let me start that over. I live with my husband, my boyfriend, and my boyfriend's wife. And together we have four happy children. At least when I originally started swinging, just an exciting thing to try. Through that, we were lucky enough to meet our other partner, Sean and Teja.

We're polyamorous now. We're in a closed quad. Tyler and I already have a closed quad. We're gonna learn some new terminology. I know. Okay, I'm jumping on board this train because when you have, when you can just say, as my wife Astrid, we're in a closed quad.

We're in a closed octoplet. What do you think about that? We're a closed couple. That's what I say when I go somewhere. I'm like, this is my wife Astrid and we're a closed couple. Don't even try. Two previous children.

I found out that I was pregnant with Barry. Before, Barrett was born. I don't know. She was pregnant. At first, I was a little bit hesitant to not know who the fathers of Barrett or Carver were. Have you ever personally wondered about it? So welcome to our big party. They don't know the

fathers of the children are. Is that the wildest thing you've ever fucking heard? Crazy. We know somebody personally who does not know who their father is, right? And to me to put myself in the shoes of that person, and this is not like

an adoption situation. This is a situation where they just don't know who their father is. That is a fucking wild thought. And I know there's lots of adopted folks out there. One of my good friends is adopted and he doesn't know and he doesn't want to know. Like it's not of interest to him, right?

Cause he just, his parents are his parents and that's what the way he wants to keep it. But to be living in the same house as your father and still not know which one is your father is weird and what happens 10 years from now And this is all fallen apart. Oh, I mean, I think they're gonna be able to tell I smell a boring povage episode coming up Just in this one house family but

So welcome to our big polyamorous family. I live with my husband and my boyfriend and my boyfriend's wife. And together we have four happy children. We're just a normal family like anybody else except. There's more of us. We're lucky enough to find out. No, no, no, no. No, no, no. You may be human beings like everybody else.

But there's nothing normal about what's, I mean, not normal means what the average, right? What the average is doing. You guys are doing something whole new. Not only are you polyamorous and there's two couples and two couples to get their living in a household, but you don't even know who the fathers of your children are, yet they're living under the same roof.

This is like mind-blowing to me. I don't know why, but it's so crazy to me. I can't imagine, you know, my kids are at the age where they ask a lot of questions. Why, why, why, and one of my kids is extra curious about everything. He wants to know the minutia of everything. Why, which way are we going? How are we going to get there? Why, why, why, why, why, endless wise?

You can never get to the bottom of an answer because it's always why, right? He started asking the question, who made me? Who's my daddy? Why are you my daddy? How did you become my daddy? Ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha. I don't know that I am your daddy. It's not a great answer to that question.

Just call me daddy, but I'm not 100% sure you're my kid. Yeah, that's gotta be confusing. Oh my God my kid. Yeah, that's got to be confusing. Oh my God, there's a therapist that's like, Oh yeah. Hit the power ball with this family. House with two masters. There's one master on each side of the house, and then a baby's room across from each master,

and then the two big kippoons are actually downstairs. This is mine and my husband, Sean's room. He keeps the majority of his stuff in here, but he and Tyler actually rotate rooms every other night. Yeah, it was a little weird at first, just not sleeping in my own bed, but now it's like I get to sleep over every night. I just sleep over. We're fucking up our kids for life. Ha ha ha. Oh man. Dude. Dude.

I don't even know. I don't know the phrase this question. I want to, I'm just going to say it how I say it. Take your, your stepdaughter. Okay. Shover back about five years. And then she comes home and she says, you know, step mommy, I wanna go over to the Johnston's for a sleepover.

And the Johnston's are switching bedrooms every night and the children don't know who their parents are. Yeah. You letting your stepdaughter go over there for a sleepover? I don't know. I don't even know that I'm letting my kids go for sleepovers. I read this whole article the other day. It said, our sleepovers. I read this whole article the other day.

It said, our sleepovers over, right? Why would the do with sleepovers? There's so many parents that are untrusting of the situations, even the people that they know pretty good. I mean, like if it's your uncle or if it's your best best friend for 50 years, right? Like if it's, if one of the kids wanted to go spend the night at your house when they were old enough, of course I'd be like, yeah, I trust, I trust trust, right?

But if it's like a friend at school and their parents, people are afraid to let their children go somewhere where they may or may not be exposed to something. I don't know, that's being a little overprotective by saying, yeah. I don't know, I might agree with the lady. But as a guy who's done a lot in my life, right? Yeah, I know. As a guy who knew the second that Astrid got pregnant,

that the universe was gonna automatically come in the back door and give me the daughters that I so desperately didn't want to have, not because I didn't want daughters or children, but because I never want to answer the door and see Brian Green on the other side of it. Oh, it's going to happen. Yeah, I know it's going to happen.

And you know what my friend Raphael said, I said, if that kid comes to the door and it's Brian Green, I'm going to reason with him. I'm going to do the only thing I know to do with a Brian Green. I'm giving you a suitcase of Bud Light and a hundred dollar bill. I'm going to tell her you never showed up. Don't talk to my daughter anymore. And Raphael said, yeah, but if it's Brian Green, you're taking the 100 in the suitcase and you're running around the back of the house. Look at your dad, Gaby. Let's go out. Oh, Oh! Oh!

Routine is, will you switch pillows? No. Oh. You gotta get every night, every night. What about the pillows? I don't know, they're switching pillows now and it's the whole thing. It's got bed bugs or I don't know what's going on.

At least when I originally started swinging, it was just an exciting thing to try. And through that, we were lucky enough to meet our other partner, Sean and Tayah. We don't consider ourselves fingers anymore. That's how we met but we're polyamorous now. We're in a close quad. We don't date other people anymore. It's in a close quad sound like a it's like an Olympic term for water polo or something. There's John with a close quad over the top into the basket. Look at that close quad defense. They've got going on there.

Good tone. First of all, Yammer S before we found each other. I think I actually was tired that sent the first thing saying, this is us. This is Paul Yammer S and we're like, yeah, that's right. That's who we are. When we started talking, we met like that very next week and we just wanted to see more and more of each other. We were making plans for the following weekend before we had even left and then again that

next weekend and I always like to say that once we started talking, we just never stopped. So, we're living in Portland at the time so we were driving an hour and a half down here to see the moon. I just want to say once we started talking, there was a dick in my mouth. At least I own my mouth, there was a dick there. That's every weekend. At least I were looking at buying a house in the country, so we had some room for the horses,

and it just made sense to find a house that would work for all of us. Yeah, it made sense. I was looking for a house for the horses. Then I looked for a house with the horses and the other couple were bringing into the relationship. Just made sense. Our quad manifesting.

And how a house big enough for our blended family. You know, they seem happy. They do. They seem happy. You know, but please for the love of Christ, go get those DNA tests. Yeah, that's kind of unfair. I would tell everybody not to do a DNA test, but I'm going to tell these people, they need the, this is why ancestry.com was born

Mori povich ancestry.com figured out wherever you want to go. Yeah Tyler and I already had two previous children. I always wanted the third but it was Very difficult to make that decision when there was just two of us What happens when you have a mad cow and a mad sheep? What what happen? You kill them. They're, they're mad. Before they infect the flock. They're crazy.

Crazy cows. That's what they're about. How are they now? Dirty. Huh? Me? No, they're in a dead mood. I know, I thought I was pregnant with Dirty and we were all pretty excited.

Now I'm trying to figure out who the kid looks like. I know. Poor Barrett the bastard. He's just sitting there waiting for his daddy to come along. He's just cheering. Poor Barrett. He's so cute. Full of hope and joy and opportunity and possibility.

Plenty of therapy sessions ahead, Barrett. You'll be all right. About a month before Barrett was born, I know she was pregnant. So we weren't regulating who got, who pregnant we were just trying in general. We weren't regulating where the come went. I know, that's what I'm, it's crazy.

It's crazy. This is a total free for all. Just mix it up on it. Yeah. Don't worry about it, just let it all flow, buddy. We were running train after train after train, hoping someone would get pregnant by somebody. And look at that, two came out.

We didn't want to know who the dad was. It wasn't important to us. We were raising them as all of ours anyway, so it doesn't matter who the father is. Says the guy who's pretty sure he's not the father. Says the guy who thinks his odds are pretty slim of being the father. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha There's more parents and it's more fun because I have more people to play with. Okay, good. Okay.

What do you think the school situation is? Like, I imagine that when you grow up in 2023, like my children are growing up, right? That the whole world is going to be just different color differently for them. Oh, yeah. Maybe having four parents is not like a strange thing. Exactly.

I think about my education showing up and saying, I had my two, you know, my two dads and my two moms. I'm pretty sure that would have been a tough road to hoe with some of the assholes that I went to school with. Yeah, exactly. I mean, you know, looking for any reason to make you an outcast. Right. And then that's a pretty big reason to make you an outcast. Yeah, maybe it that's a pretty big reason to make you an outcast.

Yeah, maybe it'll be more of the norm to be outside of the norm. Yeah, I mean, that seems where it's headed. Everyone does what they want to do. And I think there's one, there's a lot of good things about, I guess, progress. Progress always tends to be tough, right? We're all breaking through kind of one tough step at a time and a lot of times we take two steps backward and one step forward.

But I think what's great about the world that we live in today is that no matter who you are, it's likely that you're gonna be accepted by some circle of people and no matter who you are, what you like or what you do or what you're into, it's likely you'll be able by some circle of people and no matter who you are, what you like or what you do or what you're into, it's likely you'll be able to connect with those people. That's fantastic.

When I was a kid, I used to like the master bait with a Charmin role, like an empty Charmin role. Now, I can go on Reddit and everybody's whacking off with Charmin roles. It's not weird, but back then, I was just a strange kid with a toilet paper roll on the dick. Hahaha. I was just a kid.

You had to get your EPMs in. Yes, I was just a kid throwing a bunch of extra toilet paper in the toilet so I could get fuck that roll. Hahaha. I see you there. I wanna squeeze your roll, Charmin. Hahaha. That Charmin Roll your roll, Charmin. That Charmin roll was looking at me weird.

Do you still get a little tingle-feeling? Let me see a toilet roll today. Forget about it. Let's tell the kids. Don't throw that paper towel roll away. That's mine. Daddy's got to get his EPMs in. If I have 21 EPMs a month, 19 of them are with Charmin. If I have 21 EPMs a month, 19 of them are with Charmin. Charmin and a Victoria Seeker catalog from 1991.

That's all I need. No complication here. I think you should do a commercial for Charmin. Oh, I will. This is why we don't have any fucking sponsors, because Brian makes fun of everything. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha.

Ha ha ha. Ha ha. Ha ha. Ha ha. Ha ha. Ha ha. Ha ha. Ha ha.

Ha ha. Ha ha. Ha ha. Ha ha. Ha ha. Ha ha. Ha ha. Ha ha.

Ha ha. Ha ha. Ha ha. Ha ha. Ha ha. after talking it through with the other adults in our family and realizing we can have that conversation when it comes up. We're gonna try and pull yourself up as much as we can. But how are you gonna have that conversation when it comes up if you don't even know who the father is? Yeah, you just have to say it. I don't know. Yeah, you gotta kind of, you have to figure this information out.

I mean, like I'm no therapist and I'm sure, like these people are, they're in, they have their facilities about them. Yeah, they seem like lovely people. Yeah, they're not crazy people, right? I don't think so. I don't know. We've watched three minutes of the video,

but I'm assuming they're not crazy people. But this is gonna be a question that's gonna come up relatively quickly. It's not gonna be when they're 15. It's gonna be when they're four and five. Who's my daddy? Which one of these Yahoo's is my dad? Which one of these fuck-ups is my dad?

So I know what it's all about. I mean, think about two if it didn't work out with the two of these two couples. There's a 50% chance that it doesn't work out in the end. Yeah, and then you just don't know. You just don't know. How has you even split the kids up? I don't know.

That's true. Which one's coming with you? I don't know. Well, let's split them in half. Okay. Oh. Have you ever personally wondered about Well, let us split them in half. Yeah, okay. Oh! Have you ever personally wondered enough? Sure, I've wondered about it,

but I see Sean as a wonderful daddy to the babies and I see Tyler as a wonderful dad to them and that's all that really matters. No, it's not. Everybody's wondered. Everyone's secretly wondering who the kid kids real father is This is like the world's worst secret. You know what I'm saying. Oh, yeah, I just would kill me at night I'd be like tossing and turning yeah, and that's my kid. Yeah, exactly

Yeah, and how can you say to you like oh, he's got my nose. Yeah, you know, you can't say where is it his nose? He's got my nose He's got John's dick Not really sure and if the kid ends up being like a little bit, you know, a little bit lighten the brain cells. He's not mine. It's John. Yeah.

Can you get that remind? When he goes to jail and calls for bail, he's going to be like, I knew you were in my kid. Talk to John. Talk to daddy John. Everybody wants to know. Get it done with. I get if you pulled these people secretly, if you took them all aside and put them in a box and said, do you want to know who the kid's father is? Because I got the information right here.

They would all say yes. Everyone of them would be like, yes, please tell me. I know. I wonder how they came up with this decision because she seems like she what she did want to know. Yeah, she does want to know. But then she talked to the other ones and they said, nah, no, some, somebody. Some altruistic mentality came about. They're all pregnant in this trek and trimester when everybody's shining and glowing and everyone's excited about the fucking kid. That second trimester fools ya.

Cause you're like, oh my God, I'm gonna have a baby. Everything's gonna be great and wonderful. The fourth trimester is not so fantastic. I've just tell it ya. When you're getting no sleep and you're paying money The bottle after bottle after bottle and diaper after diaper Plus let's be honest about it You like your kids more than you like other kids, right? That's why I'd want to know I'd be like which one do I supposed to like more? Oh, fuck me.

What's up with this fucking music? I don't know. It's so nice. It's like, I'm getting dirty. I'm getting dirty. I'm getting dirty. Well, they're writing horses. So, Johnny has a daddy.

Has to daddy. Is that a leafy, leafy, leafy? This. Yeah. Johnny has a daddy has to daddy Johnny has a mommy's got four mommy's Why don't you just tell them what the mommy is what you go that far How does your family and close friends respond when you told them? We kind of had a mixed bag of experiences with that.

We had some people in our lives who right away were like, that's great. We had some people who were cautious at first or had to. Yeah, what about the grandparents? Yeah. I mean, you're really not allowing the grandparents experience. I'm not.'m in no idea. You don't want to know. I guarantee those grandparents want to know.

Those grandparents are talking shit about you. Every chance they get there behind your back, like I know that little shithead who keeps spilling his milk everywhere. It's not our kid. Our kid. The grandparents have to accept them both as their grandchildren.

How else could you do it? I don't know. You got to take the chance. It's a 50-50 chance. He's mine. So I guess I'll just like, what do they just start like favoring one? They're pretty convinced that it's ours.

And they're like, we don't need to see, we don't need to see Todd Jr. today. We just want a little Davie over. Bring over a little Barrett. He's cute. Here's the other thing that I was thinking. These people are saying like, oh, most people accepted it and were great.

Some people were a little bit more cautious. The commercial break hated us. We don't hate you. A lot of people make it about them, about how does it affect us. It doesn't affect you. At the end of the day, it doesn't affect you. We were just telling you because you're part of our lives

and everyone has their choices to either be part of it or not. A lot of people. Wait, okay, so he's talking specifically about the grandparents and immediate family. Yeah, God. He's saying, you know, it's not about you, it's about it. No, it's not. Anytime you make a life decision about this,

it really becomes about everybody. Yeah, it does. When I have a new child, and it seems like I have one every two seconds around here, when I have a new kid. Because you do. Because I do. I've been, who has been pregnant for eight years straight. It seems like it doesn't seem like it is the truth that grandparents, uncles, aunts, all of it. They're all affected by these decisions. It's your decision to have the child, it's your responsibility, and you take facility

of the situation, but it certainly affects those around you. Oh, that's massive. In massive ways that you can't even possibly understand until you actually are in it. And so I don't blame the grandparents. I got you. You're in a weird situation. You're making your own life.

You're doing your own thing. You're making your own life. You're doing your own thing. You're making your own decisions. I just don't think this is a great decision. I don't care about the polyamory anymore. Polyandromity, amy or whatever. That's the least of the concerns. That's the least of my concerns. That's the least strange part about this.

I'm just thinking of myself as poor Baron. I wonder who his dad is. I keep on seeing Matias looking at me and going, are you my daddy? You might be. I am 90% sure that you're probably my kid. I'm just thinking of myself as poor Baron. I'm wondering who his dad is.

I keep on seeing Matias looking at me and going, are you my daddy? You might be. Yeah. I am 90% sure that you're probably my kid. I'm just thinking of myself as poor Baron. I'm wondering who his dad is. I keep on seeing. And we say it's okay, we're not asking you to do it, we're not trying to convince anybody else to live this lifestyle, we're just letting you know that this is what our choice is. The more that you talk to them and educate them, the more accepting they can be. When we're out in public, people don't really think twice about us because we present as just two

cis-header-o-manogamous couples who, you know, look like any other couples that are hanging out together, unless they're really paying attention and see, oh well, he was holding his hand and then he gave Alicia a kiss. Some of the people will do a double take. Wow, it seems like they're really happy to share all this on social media. Yeah, they're tick tock. A lot of tick tock in here. What you're not seeing, you can go to youtube.com slash the commercial break if you want

to watch some of the actual video from this. But what you're not seeing if you're just listening is they're keep on these clips are mainly, a lot of these clips are being pulled from Instagram. It seems like tick tock. Tick tock, excuse me. And yeah, you know, again, tell the kid who his dad is, poor bear it. Geez, guys, I'll pay for it.

You come on the commercial break and we get to do the reveal like Mori Povitch, I'll pay for it. The commercial break is gonna pay for that answer. How much is an ancestry? Uh, yeah, I don't know, like 70 something dollars, I think. I don't know. It's $70 something I think. I don't know. The commercial break will pay for one-seventh of ancestry.com DNA.

Well, kids should be $10. Actually, you'll get a free sticker, EPM. But it's a $10 for postage. Friends about the kids. You know, when we're educating them, it's polyamory is not about sex, it's about relationship dynamics and loving more than one person. We're definitely not teaching them polyamory. We're teaching them that they can love whoever they want and how many people they want

in a consensual way. I think that having four parents does make us all better parents because you get the other side of what you're not normally accustomed to. I do have older kids and I parent it in a certain way and they had Dylan and Ranney before we got there and they parent it in a certain way so you get to see both sides of how people parent and so it makes you more I feel it makes you more rounded parents for sure. Not feel you're just confusing the shit out of those kids. Yeah, right.

Yeah, I don't want more parents. I want to less parents. I mean, come on, I'll take a moment. I did a. Yeah. I don't want more parents. I want to have less parents. I mean, come on, guys, think about it. I need a little concept. It's very idealistic. It's very idealistic. It's very idealistic.

Yes. But when it really comes down to brass tags and you're, you maybe believe in raising the kids one way and the other dad doesn't or mom doesn't like that. Yeah. How do you do that? And if you don't even know who your dad is, then who do you go to? I mean, okay, you can go to either of them for advice.

But if you just don't like the way one of the parents parents do, then you go to the other. God, maybe I actually needed more parents. Maybe I needed parents. Okay, that went out. Start this because we were missing something. We realized that we could add something to our lives. There's no way we could have made it to where we're at now

without a lot of honest, open, sometimes really hard communication, you know, talking about what we wanted, that I could have wanted this to be a romantic relationship, how we balance these things and make sure that our existing partners feel the love that we still have for them. As long as we're happy. We're gonna stay together. Hi. What happens when you're not happy? I know.

What happens when you're not happy and now the kids don't know who their parents are and where do they go and who's legally taking responsibility for them? I don't know. It seems like it's not all. It seems like a lot. It seems like a whole lot.

The polyamory thing? Cool, man. Cool, whatever. I don't know what it's like. I just want you to tell Meredith it was down it is. That's all I want. All right, well there you go. That's my extraordinary family. And Paulie Amory quite frankly was the least strange thing about that whole clip. Wow think of the minutia of having multiple parents and not knowing who the...

Just... Well, we'll follow up with them. Because even if the kids know who the parents are, you can still continue to raise them all together, like they're doing. Yeah, I mean, it just doesn't really matter. But then, like, you need somebody, like, run to and say, like, that's my dad. Right. Right? That's my guy. That's my dad. I share his genes with him. I mean, there's lots of adoptive children that don't have that benefit.

Right. I think that's a little bit of a different situation, if I might say so, might say so. I think so. But I don't know. That family seems lovely. They seem happy. And if they're happy, then good for you. That's all that matters.

That's all we care about here at the commercial break. We do this whole show to put a smile on your face. We're not making fun of. We're making fun with. That's right we care about here at the commercial break. We do this whole show to put a smile on your face. We're not making fun of, we're making fun with. That's right. Yes. And just know, if you feel offended by anything we've said, we mostly make fun of ourselves. So we also feel offended.

We're all over it. We love you no matter who you are. As long as you're happy, just get bare to certificate or something. What if one of the dads was like, you're happy, just get bare to certificate or something. What if one of the dads was like, you're really my kid, don't tell anybody. Got a DNA test on the side

and was like, oh, you know what is. Of course it is. This is not going to be all, this is going to turn to the white lotus real quick. Everything everywhere of most places or whatever that movie is, it's all going to get strange.

Alright, tcbpodcast.com hit the contact us button and tell us you want a 21 EPM sticker send us your physical address and we will send you one along with a couple of other goodies you might like. It's all free to you. That's tcbpodcast.com. You can also see all the video and watch and hear all the audio right from the website. You don't have to go anywhere else. But, if you do go somewhere else, leave us a review, maybe a comment or a like.

Most podcast players have them and it's a way we grow the show. We really would appreciate it. Keep the positive reviews coming and the negative ones, whatever. 855-TCB-8383. That's 1-855-TCB-8383. toll free from anywhere in the world. We'll pick up the charges. You can text us your comments, questions, concerns, or content ideas.

We love to hear them. We will always respond personally. We never sell your phone number. YouTube.com slash the commercial break for full episodes. The same day they air on the audio feed. Please subscribe and like at the commercial break on Instagram. Okay, Chrissy, I guess that's all I can do for today. I think so, Brian. So I'll say I love you.

I love you. Best of you. And best of you. And best of you. And best of you. And best of you. And best of you. And best of you.

And best of you. And best of you. And best of you. And best of you. And best of you. And best of you. And best of you. And best of you. And best of you. And best of you. And best of you. And best of you. And best of you. I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a...