The Confessionals - 744: Inside the UAP Intel Loop

Episode Date: April 1, 2025

In episode 744: Inside the UAP Intel Loop, former military intelligence analyst Michaela Fachar shares the story of how her deep dive into consciousness, social constructs, and national security turned into a harrowing descent into something far stranger. What began with logical research and classified videos of UAPs in the Middle East spiraled into weeks of bizarre visions, flickering lights, and impossible glitches. Then came the translucent object that moved like it was cloaked, the metal spheres floating on surveillance footage—and the moment a government vehicle seemed to lead her directly into a hospital… where no one would acknowledge why she was there.She wasn’t seeking attention. She was looking for help. But as her questions grew louder—about UAPs, military reporting choke points, and black programs—the silence from above became more deafening. Then came the whispers of non-human intelligence. The dreams. The spiritual oppression. The message in the dark. What was real? What was planned? And more chillingly… what was watching her the whole time?Become a member for ad-free listening, extra shows, and exclusive access to our social media app: theconfessionalspodcast.com/joinThe Confessionals Social Network App:Apple Store: https://apple.co/3UxhPrhGoogle Play: https://bit.ly/43mk8kZMy New YouTube ChannelMerkel IRL: @merkelIRLMy First Sermon: Unseen BattlesSasquatch and The Missing Man: merkelfilms.comMerkel Media Apparel: merkmerch.comSPONSORSSIMPLISAFE TODAY: simplisafe.com/confessionalsCONNECT WITH USWebsite: www.theconfessionalspodcast.comEmail: [e-mail] Michaela Fachar on X:@MichaelaFacharMAILING ADDRESS:Merkel Media257 N. Calderwood St., #301Alcoa, TN 37701SOCIAL MEDIASubscribe to our YouTube: https://bit.ly/2TlREaIReddit: https://www.reddit.com/r/theconfessionals/Discord: https://discord.gg/KDn4D2uw7hShow Instagram: theconfessionalspodcastTony's Instagram: tonymerkelofficialFacebook: www.facebook.com/TheConfessionalsPodcasTwitter: @TConfessionalsTony's Twitter: @tony_merkelProduced by: @jack_theproducerOUTRO MUSIC Joel Thomas - "Rose In A Cage" YouTube | Apple Music | Spotify

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Media This was all circulating around the base That a giant had been killed But no one was supposed to talk about it I saw three long, bony fingers Reach up underneath the door Curl up to grab it and then disappear When he came over to me

Dude he slithered over to me And this giant comes out of the cave and they're all frozen And he starts running and firing up this giant. With a giant moves, he's got a spear in one hand, and he's running really fast. It spears, Dan, holds them up like this. Somebody else, shoot him in the face, shoot him in the face. They basically decapitated.

Something pulling at my leg, and I look over, and there are two small, it's pulled off the best, bush, and I touch air. Couldn't breathe, and it couldn't move, because I know I'm seeing a monster. Welcome to the show, everybody. you're listening to The Confessionals podcast. I'm your host Tony Merkle. Thanks for being here. If you have a crazy wild experience, you want to share with me on the show, go ahead and shoot me an email. My email address is contact at theconfessionalspodcast.com. That's contact at the confessionalspodcast.com. Or go to the website, the confessionalspodcast.com. Hit the contact section and you can reach me that way as well.

Either way works for me, just get a hold of me. If you have not done so yet, go to murkmerch.com for all your Merkle media apparel needs. We got a new t-shirt up there and it's called It Gets Weird. members, please go ahead and check it out before it's too late. I want you guys wearing the threads before anybody else. So go ahead and check it out, murkmerch.com. Also check out murklefilms.com for your on-demand streaming needs. We got our documentaries up there. Some other independent creators are up there as well. And we are going to be featuring more coming very, very soon. Now, friends, today we have McKella coming on the show. And she sits down with me as a former intelligence analyst who shares her firsthand experiences working in military intelligence and

witnessing UAPs while she was deployed in the Middle East. She comes on today to blow the whistle. And so let's get to her right now. All right, today we have McKella here. How are you? I'm good. How are you? Good. Doing well. So I found you on X. And I can't remember how, you know how X sometimes just pops random people up in your feed? And your post came up. where you were kind of reaching out to Sean Ryan, Tim Burchett, and trying to get somebody's attention with some information you have. And I was like, maybe I'll reach out to her and see if she wants to talk to me. And fortunately, you did.

So thank you for coming in. In fact, I don't know if you know this, but this is the district that Tim's from. Did you know that? Oh, that's really cool. Yeah. Like, I think his office is probably like 20 minutes from here. And I text him and let him know you were coming in and stuff. and he responded, but he has to be diplomatic with it.

So like, but I invited him to be here in studio, but I think he's in D.C. right now. But anyways, so you have, on the post that you made on X, you referenced this idea of blowing the whistle on things that you know. Before we get to that portion of things, if you could let people know maybe what your back. background is and your history and what you did in the military that lays the foundation for what you're going to be sharing today. Sure. Well, my name is Mikhailo Fachar. I was in, I was an intelligence professional in the U.S. government. I started out in 2018 when I enlisted in

the United States Air Force Reserve as an all-source analyst. So an all-source analyst is essentially the intelligence analyst that aggregates different kinds of intel. So it could be satellite imagery, it can be signals intelligence, and strategic intelligence, which would be like what is XYZ country doing in the next five years so that I can paint a picture of what a particular country is doing in a specific region. And I can brief or present that information to whoever is a decision maker. And I started out my career in that. And then I went into, to the National Geospatial Intelligence Agency, where I was a Chinese language-enabled geospatial analysts. And I did really things similar to cartography using ARC GIS, certain software applications,

where I can create maps or update maps. And then I deployed to Qatar with the United States Air Force. It was my first time active duty operationally. And I was at the Centcom Air Operations Center there, where I worked as a unit support analyst. So a unit support analyst is someone who works basically similar to a help desk or phone or the central like comline for the 24-7 Intel office or we call it shop. And I would sit, I would pretty much work on different intelligence. People would call me, ask me questions, very unofficial.

The main official duties of that job when I started there was, night shift where I created, I aggregated all of the information from our pilots and the mission reports. And then I would put all of that information into the graphic intel summary, which just was a map of the region of all the countries that we have operations in. And I would put a little chip or chit where like a little icon in whatever region and activity took place. For example, it could be an interception by a Russian fighter. It could be seeing UAVs. UAVs being unmanned aerial vehicles like drones. It could be a variety of things.

And at the time, there was no chip four anomalous aircraft or events that were of concern, but didn't fit into any of the conventional boxes or categories that we had. So there was no procedure for reporting that at that time. So I know that the whole disclosure thing started, I think, around 2017. And I know there's procedures now, but was there, so there was no procedures then to report such anomalous vehicles? Right. So actually, I never even thought about UFOs or anything like that, even in my intel career. So being in conventional military until Tom DeLong and to the SARS Academy, I heard about it from some friends, but it was still kind of fringe from our perspective. and it was when I was deployed, we just didn't talk about it.

It came to a point, though, where we were, we actually have access, we have basically like an internet for classified for people who have clearances. And the, I don't know what the acronym stands for, but it's J.Wix. That's what we call it. And you can look at videos. We have things that are similar to kind of like YouTube, but not exactly like YouTube, where you can pull up videos and different things. So you can look up, you could type in orbs, you could type in UAP, UFO.

And because we had mission reports, and a lot of the ones that I was seeing anomalous aircraft on, where they would attach video footage from their feed, these were coming from task forces, which are generally like our Joint Special Operations Command. And that's just something I remember. And the reason why I remember that is because not that it makes it, the difference, right? We're in official capacity and we're in theater. We're in the region where we have high-stakes missions. So no one would be lying about this kind of information. But I do at that point hold it in higher regard considering why would joint special operations who work very high-op

missions be pushing up, you know, video footage of UAPs if it didn't peak their interest or raise questions, considering that they work the more dangerous missions. So I remember that. And it came to a point where I would ask or go defer to my NCOC, who is the enlisted supervisor. It stands for non-commissioned officer in charge and show her and ask her what to do because I was only in enlisted E4, which is a senior airman. So I'm a junior enlisted person on the team. And we're We would shrug. So it wasn't nefarious. It was we didn't really have, we just, imagine going to a random person in the street back,

you know, even now it's more acceptable, but back maybe in 20 years ago, they would laugh if you talk about UFOs, right? It's still very, it's a stigma. It's not even accepted as part of the reality. And so we brushed it off a lot of the time. We said just, you know, don't report it. We don't have anything. We don't know how to report it. we don't know if it's something very serious, right?

We're just, we need to report the things that we actually have information and evidence of occurring within the region. And anyway, so fast forward to a little bit later, we had a new officer in charge. So on our team, we have the junior enlisted people. We have the supervisor, the enlisted supervisor, and then we have an OIC who's an officer in charge and it's a captain. and he's guard, he was from the Guard, Air National Guard. And I remember I brought it to him and I said, hey, like we're getting a lot of these reports, right? And I think she wasn't working on the at the time, right? So I was just going to them because it got to a point, even though I didn't really care for UAPs,

I didn't know about like the whole situation. It got to a point where it was hard to ignore. And he was upset because I said, I said, come on. I didn't call him dude. you're not supposed to, sir. But I'm thinking like, dude, like, and I pull up different videos from our classified from J.Wix to show him matching some of the stuff saying this is not the only time that we've seen this kind of reporting. But a lot of people, it was like a controversy.

And then it was joke, right? Because we didn't think anything of it. And we moved on. So are you actually saw footage of these things? Yes. And like how like how, like how. often was this happening for you guys? Honestly, I remember it being every week we would get something.

But you have to remember, we process all of the mission reports from within the Middle East. So you're getting a lot of reports. So all the reports in the Middle East happening weekly and you didn't know, you personally didn't know what these things were and where they were coming from, what was your concern that this was something that was maybe another country with technology that we don't even understand versus maybe the like I know you said you weren't into the UFO topic and stuff but did it cross your mind that is this something you know other than human like what was your concern level at that point I didn't discount non-human intelligence but my first

my initial reaction was that maybe we don't have an understanding of the real game that we're playing. And game being the national security picture, what kind of advanced technology there was. I remember the first time that I considered that it could be non-human intelligence. And you have to remember, I don't know that we have stealth things. Like even whatever high technology that Lockheater's skunk works has, I wasn't interested. I wasn't, you know, I wasn't read up on all that. We had one video from one of the task force units. And this video was just one of our birds that are loitering.

Usually they do pattern of life. So they're looking at a particular area where there might be terrorist activity. And while it was loitering this translucent, very strange, amorphous-looking object just like zooms past. but it looked translucent almost like invisible, but you could see it. Like the, it just looks like it's trying to cloak itself. Like kind of like the predator in the movies where it was like cloaked and it was like translucent,

but you can kind of see something that was still there. Is that what you're talking about? It might be. I haven't seen Predator. Okay. It looks like you could, like a bubble. You could see like the curvature. You see that it's not quite.

Like there was a disturbance there. Like something is there, but you're just not seeing the full picture and physical nature of it. You can see the outline of it and it's amorphous and it doesn't look like it's static. Like it's shape-shifting. Okay. But it does look like it's cloaking itself. And it goes past and you see it. And I rewatch this again and again.

And that was the first time I thought that there might be aliens. But I laughed, right? I was like, I'm like, what is this? Right? What is it? But yeah. So you have that experience and you're watching. watching this, what's, you're just told to suppress this and not report it?

They were dismissive. It was just, it wasn't nefarious. It wasn't like a black program came and said, don't report the UAP activity. Nothing like that regarding the UAPs. It just was that we, we left, right? We were like, maybe, it's just maybe nothing. Maybe nothing. Yeah. Interesting. Doesn't seem like nothing. You know, like it's just, like when you, when you look at it, it's just like, when people have experiences with, let's say, UFO, it happens with other things too, like when they, when they encounter like cryptids and stuff like that. But a lot of times, when you have a group of people experiencing UFOs, say you're driving down the road and everybody has this UFO encounter, it's not uncommon for people to have this dramatic

experience and then they just never talk about it. It's like, it's just something that, like, they never, it's never discussed. And I don't know if that's a psychological thing where it's like, we're going to just pretend that never happened and we're not going to talk about it or if there's something that's affecting them that it just never occurs to them to talk about it. So in your situation, it's like it was just laughed at and moved on, right? Now, how many people saw this outside of yourself? We have the video footage. So whoever pulled the feed from the one of our words and then processed it, and then my team saw it, and whoever had access to the database

where we process all the mission reports, which is funny, it's called Kessel Run. And I'm also not a Star Wars nerd, so someone had to tell me that it was from Star Wars. Oh, see, you just informed me now, so that's good to know. So Kessel Run is the data, the data software that it's stored on. And so anybody who has access to that would have access to this footage. Now, is that footage still, do you think, available to,

day? Yes. Is that then footage that you think they're, why has it not come out then? You know, like, with all this footage, I mean, you said that it was like a weekly thing and the disclosure that's happening, is it that, does Congress not know that this is a software that is available to them? Is it available to them? Can they pull that footage at any time to start looking at this stuff? I don't know how that works with Congress, but people who have a username and they have a need to use that database can pull up

information. So anybody could leak this if they wanted to? Yeah, we hope that they don't. So this was back in 2021 when we weren't reporting it. As far as I'm concerned, I don't know if they've changed, you know, changed and started reporting on the, I'm assuming so. It's hard to ignore it. And then, you know, in the beginning, was Two the Stars came out, really started to desigmatize this.

And over time, what I noticed when I was in intelligence is that more and more people were interested in accepting that there was something going on. So it very well can be the case that they are reporting on it now. I don't know. Interesting. Hopefully. So you mentioned about the, the translucent aspect of that one UAP, which. kind of like we were talking about before we went to record here, there's a whole like supernatural aspect to this whole disclosure stuff that I'm seeing.

And the translucent side of it, it can go both ways in my mind. It could be something that's a supernatural, very other. Or I think it could be a situation where there's technology that does have the cloaking ability. And I've seen videos online, you know, I don't know if they're real or not, but like, I've been told that we have technology that could cloak a tank out in the middle of a field. Let me ask you, do you know anything about that? I don't. Oh, okay.

Dark. We used to get these in elementary school. There were these weird magazines that talked about advanced technology. And there was, I remember the raincoat that can, like, cloak someone reading about that. So I wouldn't be surprised. Right. And so that's the thing. Like, I mean, I feel like it would be silly to.

say that we don't have that kind of technology. I've talked about this on the show before, but since you're kind of new to the platform. Back when I was driving a truck, I had a delivery to a casket shop. And I'm talking to the owner of the place. And back in the 60s, he said that he was an engineer for the military,

and they were working on technology that is just being rolled out today to the public. Like the night vision and stuff, he said we had the stuff that people have access to today he said I was working on back in the 60s and I was like you want to come on my show and he's like no you know he's an old man but like I look at that and I think I think it'd be silly for us to say this technology this whatever you experienced with that translucent aspect of it it'd be it'd be silly for us to say it can't be technology that has been built by man um now you saw the video I didn't see the video

what does your sense say? Like, I mean, just your gut reaction to it. It may not be true or not, but like what do you feel? Do you feel like what you saw in that particular video was technology of human origin? Or do you feel like it was something other? I don't know. So the reason why I don't know, and I thought about this, to figure out if I can dissect this to see, you know, really think critically, the probability of it being human or not. My only... It depends. So if it's our technology,

United States Black Program's technology, it's operating pretty recklessly and interfering with what our regular operations are to be doing that kind of maneuver, distracting us from our mission of whatever we're doing. So that would be illogical.

So I crossed that out. And then I thought about what you said, if it was adversary, if it were adversary technology, and that to me is plausible, is plausible. And then that was the first time, like I said, I said, maybe this is some NHA kind of technology. There were some videos that we have, not that were reported, but on J.Wix, where it appeared that we had orb, like full-blown metal sphere, metal-looking reflective sphere, passed by our camera. our drone feed or a drone camera so blatantly that it felt intentional.

That feels like NHI to me, unless we're doing meta disclosure for the intelligence community. That would make sense, right? If we want to desensitize the intelligence community to the fact that we have this kind of technology so that we can start to bring light to these programs, that could be the case. but it was for sure intentional because of how slowly it moved in front of the camera. And the intentionality aspect of it makes it feel more like NHI. So I floated this theory out years ago,

and I just was reminded of it as you were talking. What is the chance of government having technology like this and intentionally rolling it out, in front of our own soldiers. So say, Fravor and the Tick-Tac UFO. Is it possible that this is our own technology that we are testing on our own pilots

to see how unexpectedly, like, Fravor is like, I wasn't up there to look for this. Is it possible that this is being done intentional in the sense that we want to see how our pilots react to this technology so that we can better understand how our adversaries will react to it when we roll it out to them. Do you ever think that that could be a possibility where it's like literally it's us, it's our government testing technology on our soldiers so that when we have to use it on

foreign adversaries, we better understand how their pilots are going to react to it because we tested it on our own unexpected pilots. That is plausible considering the lack of oversight over these black programs and the unethical practices that we've seen over time because that would put our pilots in danger and I believe the female pilot that was part of the Tic Tac incident freaked out

and was pissed that the Pentagon and no one had briefed her on the possibility of that technology of existing. It is plausible and that would be a serious indictment on our on our programs

for doing that. Yeah, I mean I don't want to bring anything up that's going to make you uncomfortable. You're not active right now, right? No, I got, I did get a little uncomfortable before when you talked about leaking stuff. Yeah. I got a little bit because I said, oh, you don't have to do anything. Don't worry, FBI agent.

Yeah, you don't have to do anything you're not comfortable with. I'm just the guy that brings things up. I say stuff and it is what it is. But it's, I find it interesting that that could be the case. And we see just throughout history with our government, they've had no problem doing such things. The drawing a blank on it. Why can't I think of it now? It's going to come to me.

But there was an actual documented program where our government injected syphilis into African. Tuskegee experiment. Tuskegee, thank you. Like, that's a very documented thing. And it happened over a span, I think, 30 or 40 years. I think it ended in 72. But like to say that our government wouldn't, I think is far-fetched. And I also, I feel like there's compartmentalization with this stuff where it's for me,

I have a hard time understanding. Maybe you could shed some light on this if you have any perspective. But things that happened 50 years ago, that our government did nefariously, I have a hard time understanding why it can't be discussed now from our government unless they're still doing it. And that's how I, that's,

that's like my gut on it because I don't understand why we're just getting the JFK files now, the MLK files now. Like, why is that just coming out now that happened before we were alive? And like, what's the big, what's the big deal in secrecy of it unless it's something where it's like, yeah, we did this.

And if we admit to doing this, it points people in the direction of things that we're still doing today. You know, like, I don't know. I mean, do you have any without getting you in trouble? I don't know. Yeah. I haven't seen the information. They said they were going to release it and then they didn't.

I don't know why they wouldn't because we already know. We have movies and books about what the CIA has engaged in and the FBI. And I honestly, I don't know why they're not sharing that information. And they are definitely doing. similar things. They claim they do them overseas only. Yeah. I feel there's there's been, we can hit on this probably a little later, but there's been people recently coming out, discussing some of the operations that have been taking place. And it almost in a sense where it's like, I feel like they're saying, we're not going to stop doing it. We're just going to, we're just

going to tell you we're doing it. And it's concerning to me. So when it comes to the UAP stuff that you were seeing. You mentioned the translucent one that you saw and you mentioned about a metal sphere one. Was there a typical, I see that almost every week kind of UAP that you were seeing? Or was it very different every time you saw something that came up in the reports? There was a little bit of diversity in what that looked like. I just remember and it could be also the fact that to the stars came out with the GoFest, those balls, the balls feel like they're very common. Yeah.

But there were a variety of different things. However, some of the things that would be reported that were what they said were UFOs or unidentified could have normal explanations. And if they don't look so anomalous like what I saw with that translucent thing, I've sort of just dismissed them as maybe something else. Yeah. So are you familiar with Bob Lazar? Yes.

Yeah. So there's a lot of people in his shoes, I believe, and there have been people that come out that said that, you know, they have similar stories. But the fact that you were getting so much information on a weekly basis along these lines, what are the odds that this could have been ours, reversed engineer technology, that people like Bob Lazard talked about openly,

that they were in Pizet. Because, I mean, I think it was in, I can't remember the timeline, but one of these, I don't know if it was a hearing or what, but they said that we're in possession of craft that were not made by human hands. Bob Lazar says similar things and that he would work on them for reverse engineering. And then we have people like you saying, I saw this stuff on a weekly basis. And just for me, it keeps coming back to could this been something where it's reverse engineer technology that they, I mean, how do you test reverse engineer technology?

Like, if you have reverse engineer technology and you're ready to roll it out in a sense, how would you do it in a secretive manner? To me, it seems like they would roll it out in front of our own cameras to see that way they have footage of it and how it's operating and how it's maneuvering. And people like you just becomes a very common normal thing that you see on a weekly basis.

There is also another aspect of this, which is otherworldly, right? And we can hit on that. But I do want to, is there, did you ever see anything? Because this is something that I've always personally been interested in. Have you ever seen any kind of like triangle shape UAPs? I don't remember. No.

Are you familiar with the TR3B? Yeah. Okay. Have you ever seen, this was popular, I think, in 2018, 2019. there was an incident that happened in D.C. And I don't know how it could have been faked because we have, I think there's three different people from different locations in D.C.

filming this pyramid-shaped craft that was how, you know what I saw that. And it also, it was when we, I think, the day of the signing for the Space Force. And then apparently there was also one that went on top of Kremlin. Yes, yes, absolutely. And it looked identical, right? Yeah. All right. So if you've seen that, I mean, what's your sense?

Somebody who's seen UAP in a professional manner and you see that. I always go back to that. I'm like, I don't know how they fake that. Do you think that could have been faked at all? Do you think that was actually an incident that happened? Because if it was an incident that happened, I don't understand how it wasn't mass reported. It was so huge. I've never seen up close.

I've only seen video footage and we have electro-optical, so it's, you know, IR and furids, it's different kinds of lenses, but not up close. That pyramid, the pyramid UFO on top of the Pentagon and Kremlin that I saw online

is very vivid. So I asked different questions based off of this and based off of my personal experiences with the phenomenon. They are of a higher consciousness. They're not of that reptilian,

well, we won't go on a reptilian, but I meant like not that national security mind, which is the reptilian brain, the fight, you know, like all of that. So they are more conscious and they don't look at it as like the United States versus Russia. So whoever faked these kind of videos or if they were faked,

they wanted to make it seem like there was a higher order, maybe like a higher United Nations of a higher dimension or even just, galactic. I don't know. I just assume galactic that is warning the United States in Kremlin or United States in Russia to not get into us bring our problems out into space.

I don't know. I'm speculating. But for me, I said, why United States, you even say anything about Putin that's not negative. You're a Russian asset. Yeah. Right? So for me, it's not someone from the government.

in the United States or from the establishment. And then for it to also happen on top of Russia, if Russia were to do it, have their asset on top of their government, like their version of D.C. Kremlin, why would they do that? Like, who else would be doing it? Yeah.

I don't know. I feel like that was a case where it didn't get as much attention as it should have. I'm still surprised that people don't talk about it because it was just so, it seems so real. So in your ex post, you mentioned about another incident or incidents that you were familiar with. And it was blue-on-blue activity. Is that the right way to say it? Could you maybe expound on what that is and what you're familiar with along those lines?

why you think it's important to talk about. Right. So Blue and Blue is friendly fire. So you're not fighting your enemy. You can accidentally, if two units, if two units are in an area, Jock O'Lewillink talks about what happened with his team. Jocka Willink is a Navy SEAL who has a podcast and a book, Extreme Ownership, and I read it before. And so I know that it's not something that's too uncommon. We had a couple of events, blue on blue and it happens by accident. There are various reasons for it. The reason why I blew the whistle on that was because that was when I was going to report

on it being this particular event being a surface to air fire event, which is significant for that region because it means that someone on the ground firing at our birds, are air assets. And so we report that information. That way our other birds in the region know that we saw some activity and maybe to keep a lookout or avoid that certain area. It depends on what they're doing. But for this event, it was blue and blue, meaning that it was friendly fire and it could be accidental. It could be a variety of things. It doesn't necessarily have to be the United States on United States. It could be United States on UK, UK and US. Just we didn't intend on firing on each other.

However, in this particular instance, I was working night shift, working on the graphic and tell summaries, and going to put this information on there. This was when a CIA liaison came out of a room in the back and tapped me on the shoulder and said, you're not reporting that. You didn't give you a reason why? No. So because this is something that isn't uncommon, right? It happens. Is there typically a process that you would read? report on when it comes to that kind of activity? That's a good question. So we had another event

where I don't know where this particular reporting came from. I just know that my enlisted supervisor said we weren't supposed to report on this other blue-on-blue event due to the diplomatic implications for it. And because if it is blue-on-blue, it's technically not a threat to our forces because it was an accident. It was one of our friends. I'm sorry, what was the question again? If there was a process of typically reporting on these things and what makes this situation any different? Yeah, I wasn't informed of a process, so we just didn't report on them. So every time you didn't report it?

Really? And that came from CIA? Yes. And so this is the problem. As an E4, as an intelligence analyst, this is where I didn't even realize this problem when it happened. In fact, from a national security standpoint, when I was aware we have special access programs, not all of us are privy to that information because these people who go on these special missions, they are at heightened risk. And then they're not

only at heightened risk, they're most likely working with people who are maybe entrenched or meshed in the adversary network, like they could be a government official. And, And so they're at height and risk. And there's a good reason for putting them in compartmentalized special access programs. So looking at it from that lens, I said, okay. Well, first of all, I thought it was pretty cool that we had CIA there being brand new to intelligence and not being really familiar with anything. I wasn't even familiar with anything that we know today. I was very mainstream.

Anyway, it still doesn't suggest that there was anything nefarious for them to not want to. report that because like I said, we need to protect our assets on the ground. And also if we have maybe people who are non-official cover so that they have plausible deniability and they're not related to the United States government or working for the United States government. But this is where we come into an issue. If a pilot is working a special mission, assuming that the CIA liaison, he's overseeing intelligence reporting related to. to CIA and black programs out and about in the Middle East is that they would have already agreed this pilot and his crew who sent up the report would have already de-conflicted with the

CIA and their higher-ups to not use traditional mechanisms of reporting any activity related to what they're doing. They would have already done that. Why was it that we have a choke point in information flow. I'm not putting this information out into the public. I work in a classified facility. It only goes to other pilots in the region who are operating

and need to make sure that they're protected so that they're staying up abreast of all the threat picture and all of the threats within the region. So now an E4 is night shift on night shift

and a CIA liaison comes out and tells me not to report it, I listened to him. There were people who asked me why I listened to him. I wasn't prepared for this kind of situation. And it wasn't the first time that we were told not to report blue on blue or things like this. These came from various channels. But looking back, looking back at it, considering the CIA liaison came out and he's not talking to my leadership. He's coming to me. now I, in hindsight, was put in a predicament, do I listen to his pilots who put up the information? They didn't find anything particular about withholding that information from traditional channels,

or do I listen to a CIA liaison and assume that it's for national security reasons? And that's what I'm blowing the whistle on. That needs to be de-conflicted. I was even an older E4, and I chose not to report it, but I always. also deferred to my NCOIC. I did speak to my team, my higher-ups. But if it were a different situation, you usually have kids who just came out of high school. And you can easily, they are easily swayed because we're lower on the totem pole and we're brand new. Yeah. Just trying to make it and not make any waves. Just taking orders from anybody that has

anybody who has authority over them, it's like the answer is yes. Exactly. And I'm not saying that everyone's like that. It's, it's, it's very unofficial. It's unophisticated. So they need to figure that out prior to it coming to someone like me. Yeah. Are you concerned about talking about this? Because when I brought it up, I feel like you got nervous. Are you concerned about any kind of backlash on talking about this? No, I'm not concerned about it. I want to make sure that I'm articulating it correctly because people have misconstrued as me saying that there were allegations against the government. No, the thing that I am questioning the government in some of my post, my post after that, there weren't allegations. It was questioning the conduct of our black programs and the fact

that we had people securing opium fields in Afghanistan. That's where I start to ask a lot of questions, and accusingly, because we don't have oversight over that. When it came to the information choke point and the CIA liaison coming over and tapping me on the shoulder, by the way, don't touch me. Like, don't touch me. Hands off. Yeah, don't touch me one. But to, I didn't even know that I just withheld information. Whereas if I could go back, I would push back and then I would go to my colonel. I didn't, I didn't even think about it. And so, the fact that I made a decision, luckily, I had my supervisor and defer to them. But if I had a correct perspective of the situation now, I wouldn't even defer to them. I'd go to, I'd go,

I'd escalate it instantly just to be sure that I'm not putting my pilots at risk. So that's, that's where they need to figure out how they're going to do this. So your call to action would be that they need to fix the operating procedures when it comes to this so that the pilots aren't at risk. Correct. And that's your concern here. Correct. Gotcha. Yeah.

I mean, to me, it makes perfect sense. I told you before we started recording that, you know, like, as somebody who's not former military, like, when you talk about this stuff, it's kind of surprising because, you know, you just kind of assume there's. there's operations for everything. You know, like I run a small media company, and in that process, you build out structure so that there's a procedure in a way we do everything. It's all planned, right? And to think that, you know,

such situations like yourself, that there isn't really plans to, plans of procedure on everything, and maybe that is intentional or just an oversight. I can see how that could be, dangerous for those in the sky. You mentioned that you were one of the, you were older as far as, I guess, the position you were in. How old were you when that happened? Hey guys, this episode is brought to you by Merckmerch.com. Go ahead and get your Merkle Media Apparel

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Pruevallos all before that they're fine. I think, I think it was like 26, 26 years old. It's not uncommon to have people who are older to enlist in the,

have them enlist in the Air Force, in the military. But compared to the other junior enlisted in my team, especially ones who were active duty, I was older. Gotcha. It's interesting because I trying to put myself in your shoes

and then also the shoes of somebody much younger. I know if you're 18, 19 years old, 20, like the confusion you'd have, you know, what to do in those moments seems pretty high because I would be pretty confused myself.

So hopefully there's operate, what's your goal here? I mean, are you hoping to be able to talk to who about this kind of stuff to help kind of structure out the procedures moving forward? Is there a particular group or person you'd like to actually talk to to kind of further this along down the chain?

Yes, anyone who cares about restruct fixing these loopholes and fixing these problems that we have with information flow anyone within decision-making capacity yeah do you do you feel like because we mean we at the time of this recording i think it was like two or three weeks ago trump was inaugurated do you feel like there's a whole new wave of um with him coming into office because everybody's talking about him releasing certain files and all this stuff do you feel like there's an open window for for this kind of stuff to get worked on now because of his theoretical motivations on, you know, disclosing information and fixing what's broken, essentially. I mean, I don't want to

get political because I know there's plenty of people who are listening. He's not going to, but that's what's being said, right? So do you feel like there's an opportunity here for you to, like a window of time where you can actually maybe make headway on this? Yes, I do. Honestly, for I actually, I know you don't want to go into the political. I supported Trump since 2016. You can do whatever you want. I was just prefacing for the audience.

Yeah. And so my background is I'm a New York City millennial. And I went through the education system. There is a left-leaning bias. And my family wasn't particularly political. But some of the signs of what the reasons why he was elected this time around. And not only just elected this time by Republicans, but we had a broad coalition of people,

you started to see the signs of what we're trying to push back against back in New York City when I was younger back in the early 2000s. And so I saw that first, and I guess what we would call indications and warnings in the military, where we use this term, if we see North Korea about to launch the nuclear missiles, we'll see a series of preparatory actions before they do. and those preparatory actions that are distinct for launching a nuclear missile are called indications and warnings.

So you get a heads up. I saw the problems in the beginning. So I supported him. I didn't vote. I wasn't very active in voting. This time around, I not only held out on going back into national security because of a series of problems, which I've addressed in my ex profile and things like that. but I came out and just put out a video on X. This was before I went out with my NHI experience or anything,

stating very diplomatically that we need Trump, the Trump coalition in office. And I do, he's doing, they're already doing what needs to be done. We should have been done a long time ago. They're doing it. We've reclaimed their government. And we could, I know it's controversial and certain issues. I'm speaking from a,

American Empire standpoint. And not other things too, but I won't get into it. I do believe that this is a window. It kept the window open. It was closing. It kept the window open. And we flipped the hourglass for our country and for the world. And so I have high hopes and I have high hopes of being able to reach Congress and the Trump administration to address the information flowed this issue.

which I can provide evidence, the Kessel Run database, everything my teammates' names, for the sake of their privacy. I don't want to, you know, share their names, but I can for Congress. And then even going into other things related to national security. Yeah. For sure. Well, that's encouraging. That's encouraging. And I mean, I hope it gets that far. I really do.

Let me know if you ever get put in a skiff, you know. Maybe you can't. Maybe if you're putting a skiff, like you can't talk about what's being said in there, right? But I don't know. Like, I just find it, I find this whole thing, interesting on how it's kind of all unrolling in real time. It's just like,

it's almost as like this whole, this whole situation, your situation and the way our government's going is, it's like, almost like a divine nature in a sense. Yeah, he missed the shot. Yeah. He just missed it. Did you see the, there was a pastor who had like a prophecy about that.

Did you see that? Yeah, it was back in March. So I think it was March last year and it was what July, I want to say 31st, was it when that happened? But it was before the actual incident, he said that he saw, he had a vision of Trump getting struck in the ear with a bullet falling to his knees. and in that moment having like a spiritual awakening moment in his life. And he stood up and like it was like so accurate. And I was just like, holy cow. And the same guy also had a, and I don't want to say prediction because if he's,

if he's truly hearing messages from God, then he would be a prophet. But he's having prophetic visions, let's put that way. And the same guy had a prophetic vision that there would be an attack in New Orleans and Vegas on the same day. Like, what are the odds that this guy, I mean, unless he's plugged in and he actually is orchestrating some of this stuff, but I don't think that's the case, obviously. But it's, there's definitely something almost divine about all this stuff

and how it's unrolling in our timeline. And, you know, I really hope that you get that call to, I mean, what's the high. I mean, I don't want to say highest, but like, what's the, what's the probability that you, you, you get a chance to actually speak to, um, the decision makers within his administration, not just Congress. Because I feel like you, you, I feel like Congress is almost like a stepping stone, you know, but like, if you really want your message heard, it has to be done to somebody with, within that, that administration. Do you feel like there's a good chance of that happening now? I, I do. I just, I'm not pushing it. They have a lot of things they have to do. Yeah.

So I'll just give it some time. I'm connected to people who are like second or third removed or engaged. But whenever, whenever they want to, I share things on X. I speak to people who are in national security. So I'm not active in intelligence, but I speak to people who aren't in intelligence, who really are from academia and different places like that. and we talk about issues, especially related to my background with China and things like that. So we're just waiting for whenever they have time.

We only got about four years. So a lot can happen in four years. I think a lot's happened in less than a month of, I mean, it seems like every day there's something new happening. Maybe Canada will be a 51st state. I don't know. We do the world of favor. How so? What do you mean?

Oh, by adopting Canada? Yeah, for the people. So I know you will focus on my NHI experience. So it is related. I started at Georgetown University in fall of 2021. And that's when I had my NHI contact experience. The symptoms, or what I initially thought was that I was having a mental breakdown. But it was concurrent with a series.

of realizations about international relations and the state of the world, I was probably the only Trump supporter in that program. I wasn't open about it because there's no point. If someone knows I can discuss issues and if someone doesn't know my political leaning, they can land better when we're talking about the truth and providing evidence.

But if I go in and I tell someone my identity or my political or my beliefs, it can cast a shadow on what we need to do. Yeah. And so when I started at Georgetown, I initially went into the business and finance concentration because I like I like business and I like the free market and I like freedom. So I wanted to do that naturally. But after my NHI experience, I shifted gears and I felt compelled to go into the science technology

and international affairs curriculum, which I found out was basically co-signed by the World Economic Forum. all of these things which I would have thought were conspiracies before, globalism. I looking at the definition, every time I heard about them, it would be about like reptilians. So I always never, I never really considered it. But I was aware of an authoritarian slant with a global system before going in, considering that I supported Trump and I started becoming well-hurst in the issues. But after my, right before I had my NHA experience in fall of 2021, where I went to the Virginia Hospital Center, I was led there by an element of the U.S. government. The initial plan was that I went to Georgetown. I was disillusioned by my time in Qatar because I did augment the Afghanistan and retrograde.

So I just want to, before you go anywhere, further. I want to clarify. So this story you're about to start sharing the NHI story happened after your service. Okay. Sorry. Timeline wise, I would just want to make sure. We can go back and we could cut that and then I could use the bathroom and go. We'll go to order. I made HG too when it comes to the jumping road. Okay. It's interesting that you bring that up. And if this doesn't apply, Jack can take it out. If it applies, you can leave it in. We just had a bathroom break. And so now we're back. And it's interesting you just bring up how you've had experiences since you were younger. And I want to get into that. What I want to do now is I know there's going to be like a hard shift in this kind of conversation.

Like I believe that some of it might relate to what we've discussed. But I think there's layers here. I think we're about to start seeing an onion. And we're going to start peeling the layers back now. Because you just said that you have had experiences since you were accused. kid. And I don't know how you identified that growing up and stuff. But you tell me, does it make sense to start off as a child? Or do you want to start off in D.C. with the NHI experience that you had that. I don't know if it was all one day or what. I just know it was. It sounded like gangstocking at first when you first started sharing the experience on the other show. And the more I heard it, I was just It sounds like MKLT. I thought it was MKLT or something. And I hated them. In the moment you

thought that? I thought this for a long time. Really? Until I started to see my soul. I said, you can't tell me to do something that I don't agree with. So at the end of the day, I'm no use to anyone. Interesting. Interesting. I'm going to want to peel back layers on all this now. So how do you envision this conversation moving forward? Where do you want to start off at? I don't know. Because I know you mentioned about having demonic experiences. Is that like more recent or is that from childhood, too. No, that was right after, right before I was informed by the U.S. government, I was having contact. You were informed by the U.S. government that you were having contact? Yes. The issue, they brought me to the hospital, Virginia Hospital Center.

And I don't know who, and I hope people come out. But through people from intelligence who are NHA contacts, they did tell me that someone else had this experience of going to that same hospital being formed about contact. I don't know who, and I won't say names about the people. I don't want them, you know, this person obviously doesn't want to come out, but it happened to be another person from intelligence. So I thought, well, I was relieved because obviously my story is questionable and even questionable from people who are experiencers.

I question other people who are experiencers. But when I brought this up and I thought this was a death sentence that they're not going believe me when I spoke to people from my community, intelligence community, who are experiencers, I was told that I'm not the only one who went through Virginia Hospital Center. I thought I was just going to put a nail in my coffin. I was never going to get answers for anything. And when they told me that, I was like, damn, okay, cool. Are you, before we jump into this, I just want to ask you, are you familiar? Because I know you're on X a lot. Have you come across an account called Fringe?

You know fringe? You know a fringe? I'm friends with her and I think you and her would have a good conversation. We have, we had a next piece together. Did you really? Yes, I really like fringe. She's awesome. She's really awesome. Because she's an experiencer and what brought her to mind is what you mentioned because I know she, her experiences are something that there are people who question and all that. And when she came to me, the way that happened was I was on her ex-space as well. And she came to me asking if I joined her on a space. And I went to her profile and I saw that she was an experience. And I just told her, I said, how about we trade? You know, I come on yours and you come on my show.

I had no idea what I was getting into. And she has some wild stuff that has happened to her. She's been on your show? Twice. Oh, Matt, I want to see. I have to see that. Twice. And she'll be on plenty more times.

she would be here in studio if she would be willing to fly but she doesn't fly so uh to get her and her husband to drive across the country is difficult um but uh people ask her to come back on the show and i tell people you got to pace this stuff i can't i can't overdose on on her stories because the audience won't hear it then and it's my that's one of my biggest concerns is that the audience uh will get they'll get used to her and they won't they lose interest almost. Like, you know what I mean? And so I'll probably have her on probably mid this year again, but I just pace it because I just want people to kind of let it sit because her experiences are, she hasn't even touched the surface. Wow. But anyways, let's get into your stuff here with the

NHA and we'll just navigate the waters from childhood. We'll talk about the more demonic things. But I guess it seems like probably the best place to start and just rip the bandit off is this day, in D.C. where things seem to start unfolding for you. So you wake up in the morning. You're not a conspiracy theorist. No, I'm not, I'm for, for me at the time, Big Pharma was a conspiracy. I mean, I was aware of the wheeling and dealing the free market, basic things that, you know, happen. I've worked in international business. So you really see the free market, right? It's not like just systematized. There's a structure around it. It's very organic. more or less. However, for me, people sitting here, like, I always pictured like someone who

was just a little paranoid as looking at Big Pharma and all this kind of stuff. And so I'm not into any of this. Even though I saw UAPs and I thought, hmm, like very interesting, I'm more focused on what are we doing, right? Like what do I want to figure out my field form policy. I want to, you know, I told myself, I looked in the mirror and I always did this. And I wonder if that, That's maybe, that's just me. I always talk to myself, but I always talk to God simultaneously. That I said to myself when I was sitting in Qatar before I got into Georgetown and started at Georgetown, I said to myself that I'm going to use this opportunity because I'm presented with the opportunity to go to a number one of foreign service institution to really get to the

root cause of issues. And if I don't work as hard as I can to figure it out, and I don't mean getting A's, right? I don't mean by the system, but really digging deep to understand. And even wherever I have to look for truth, I said that I'm not being honest with myself, that I don't want to go and really help people. I just want a nice cushy job. I just want a powerful position. And that's what I told myself before I started Georgetown. Okay. So now we go to fall 2021. I'm starting at Georgetown. I'm already dismayed because people are happy and I'm not happy. I just saw what happened in Afghanistan, retrograde. I had an idea of, I did, I had a, there was a stigma that I felt about Georgetown being an elite institution that people came from higher socioeconomic.

I was looking at things that I shouldn't look at. I learned later after my NHI experience. I was looking at them from where they came from and not listening to the content of their words and looking at their character. So, anyway, so I was a little annoyed at George's, Georgetown. And when I was in my classes, it was evident that a lot of people didn't really know. And they were there to network a typical institution. But for me, it was more personal because of coming back and seeing how our military and foreign policy unfolded. So when I was at school at Georgetown doing my concentration in global business and finance, I started to pull back where I was digging into my curriculum, but seeing that I was taking it more seriously than my classmates

was frustrating. And I felt that I would never be able to do anything significant that was going to impact foreign policy and help change the course and prevent something like Afghanistan from happening again. I just didn't feel that investment for my classmates. And so it was the end of September, I put in my request to be. withdrawn from the program. And I applied to the local university to start from scratch. I'm at this point like 27 to start from scratch in physics because natural laws I felt wouldn't lie to me. Right? They don't lie. They're not deceiving. Nature is just what it is. And then I can go work in some program and I can get paid well and then explore, inquire about the universe and inquire about the way

the material world works, whereas I would have to deal with different personalities. So I put in my request and the administrators came back to me from Georgetown and asked me, are you sure you want to withdraw from the program? Because at this point, it's basically an Ivy League for all of this. And I sat there and I thought for a second and I waited a couple weeks. Well, in that couple of weeks, that's where things started to kick off. I continue my program, right? I still tabled that withdrawal. I did apply for George Mason University for their physics program, which is located in Arlington, Virginia, still in the D.C.

area. And I tabled that withdrawal from Georgetown, continued in my studies. And I'm taking courses at this point. My international relations theory and practice course, which basically teaches different kinds of theories related to international relations, It was exactly when I was learning about social constructivism. And social constructivism is basically everything's a social construct. This is actually very similar to the conversations we're having today about gender, about all these different things. So it relates to the global dynamics, but it also relates to what was man made, what's created by man versus what is nature. And that question, that nexus, that's where something happened.

And this is where I started to see, I feel like I was maybe starting to become destabilized. By that. What do you mean by that destabilized? That I started having anomalous experiences that were concurrent with a series of realizations, of factual realizations that we can all debate, depending on what angle and then come to a consensus or, you know, come to some element of an agreement or a partial agreement. or a partial agreement, something like this, not something that's not tangible, right? These were actually based in logic. Well, anyway, right when I was reading about social constructivism, my textbook, still contemplating leaving my program, having already applied to George Mason

University's undergraduate physics program or an accelerated physics master's, whatever, one of those programs. And I was reading my textbook. And when I studied, I didn't visualize. I wasn't really good at visualizing things. To be honest, I don't even know how I integrated my studies. They would come as epiphanies through my soul. It felt like. I was sitting there reading about social constructivism, and then this vision popped in my head.

It was a genderless, one of those figures from like a 3D video game, but it has no features. It's a man, and it's me sitting here, not a man, sorry, a person sitting at a table in a CAD, like, video game file or something. And the walls are up. And when I thought about social constructivism, the walls were manmade. Pop to my mind. We create these walls, these barriers. They came down and then east and west, like everything just went to infinity. Very weird. But I had another realization that I can merge my understanding of the constructs of the physical world and think of the social constructs, these intangible,

like all the things we're discussing, governance, structures of society. Think of terms of physical structures. I don't have to think about them as separate things. And it, I don't know, it kind of made sense to me in that point. And when I had this realization, which might not seem so profound, and I'm not maybe doing it justice explaining it, I had this realization, I shot up from my chair in my study, and I went into my living room and I'm thinking, thinking, thinking. Suddenly, I have, I close my eyes and it doesn't feel real, right? It still feels like a vision in my mind or I'm imagining something. I am floating in the universe and I see numbers, but imaginary numbers and real numbers, which are different concepts of mathematics, which I'm no mathematician. And it's really weird, this number line starts to flow and they start to merge into each other. And then the imaginary and the real, it was just, weird. And I thought it was super cool because I realized certain things that I didn't understand about mathematics and about the known and unknown social constructs. Obviously, I'm not doing it any justice, but I thought it was really cool because I thought, wow, maybe I always assumed I was not good at math. I'm not good at certain things. Certain things. are out of my domain, but that there is some integrated understanding of different things that they all come back to our consciousness and our understanding and being able to integrate

different ideas or whatever. But for some reason, when I started to realize that, I started to realize that I, we might have to cut this out because I'm having a hard time explaining it. I won't go on. I won't drone on about it. But I was getting more visions, more ideas that were coming into my head, coming into my mind about the social constructs and the barriers in knowledge that we create between information from the social sciences, the hard sciences between philosophy, linguistics, everything started to not seem so different where I would have to go start from scratch in every field. It felt that I can go in and read about something and extract an understanding or have some kind of understanding, whereas before

these different categories or subjects would be very different. And it's interesting because why would that matter? And why did I think it was so revelatory? Why did I think this was so, wow? Mind you, at the time, I'm not thinking that I'm having any anomalous contact or anything like this. I'm just thinking that... It's clicking in your head. Exactly. I'm having a series of epiphanies. Anyway, I go sit down and then I start deep diving into... I suddenly have this idea that... Wait a second. And it's also sparking a new interest, a reinvigorated interest. interest in me and really finding, figuring out more about this. Whereas before I have still tabled the idea of leaving to go into physics, now I have this sparked renewed interest because I feel that I am on a path of truth. And I think to myself, where a thought pops in my head where I think you have to go back, go back to the beginning and figure out what happened over the course that led us to this place

where information's all separate from the hard sciences, soft sciences, where we're having a hard time in global affairs in society. Domestically we're having issues. And when I started to go down the rabbit hole, I started with some of the philosophers just learning about them, Aristotle, Plato, whereas I used to read about them from a place before that I was so far removed from understanding any of it.

And I think that acts as barrier in and of itself, just assuming that I will never be able to do something. Now I didn't care about how, whether I would or not, I just, if I could understand like one sentence, I thought it was, it was great. So I started to go down that path. And what I realized was that I'm deviating from my studies a little bit. Though I did finish reading whatever assignments I had, now I'm looking at Aristotle and all of these Renaissance, well, it's not the Renaissance, but they're considered polymath Renaissance men who weren't stuck in a specific subject, like narrowed in, like how we specialize today, they were polymath, like they can do things in art, they were artists, they're mystics, philosophers, mathematicians. And I thought that was really interesting because

naturally that is perceived as someone who is a prodigy. someone who is particular. And what I was gathering from this was that that doesn't necessarily have to be true. And that maybe it's not, that maybe the social constructs, these ideas of like the, how we created an organized society made it so that we assume that we can't all be a jack of all trades per se or pursue different things that we like. And if you pursue multiple things, they call you a grifter. Really? Oh yeah, yeah. You can't, you can't do it. anything other than, you know, one thing at a time. And so, no, I totally agree with you. I mean, it's this idea that you can't, you can't be a mathematician and these excel in other areas.

It's kind of been built into our consciousness. It's limiting. Yeah. And when I started to realize these things, I was happy. I was happy and I was excited. Not because I'm not a mathematician. I'm not a mathematician at all. Let me make that clear. But it felt freeing. And not only freeing, but it felt that I had put myself in this box of knowledge. And then seeing what was going on with global foreign policy, politics, everything, just felt a lot of darkness. And suddenly I found this, it was like I hit the jackpot where, wait a second, it doesn't have to be this way. we can do all these different things. We don't have to specialize.

There's this assumption that to be an expert, you have to be like super specialized in something. I disagree with that because what we saw is that, well, we have access to information and we should be able to ask questions. I mean, there can be experts, but we should be able to ask questions. And that was a part of the really seemingly esoteric things

I realized in that particular moment when I had all of these different, visions come into my mind. Well, I go back to my computer and now I'm on the computer like 10 hours a day because now I have a newfound appreciation of all the access to knowledge that I have and that I haven't tapped into. Well, over the course of the next few days, I start to explore the ideas of consciousness. And the reason for that was because going back to my first vision that came in my mind when I was reading about social constructivism, it was like a 3D matrix, right? It was that social constructs, you can just go back an extra layer and call the manmade.

These are man-made constructs and also apply that to the social theories. They're man-made constructs. Unless they're based in observation and their actual. like there were actual representations of the natural order. Hey, everyone, I want to take a break real quick and talk to you about the new social media network, the Confessionals just launched. That's right. The Confessionals has its own social media platform exclusively available to members to

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of all the world to bring here his best products Provallos all before that we get so I start to go down

knowing that I still wanted to consider physics I started to take online lectures Stanford Quantum Physics I thought was

pretty cool and I just wanted to see if I can even see myself being able to sit through a class and integrate it

and at least keep up with something of that nature because eventually I would like to go into the quantum physics. That's where the theoretical of, I would say maybe where I felt that my social science, my more of the metaphysical can merge with the physical world. And so that was what I would plan to do. As I was taking these lectures, I started to look up different people of theorists,

mathematicians, theoretical physicists, and they have all open source kind of information or classes you can take. I came across Sir Roger Penrose. Sir Roger Penrose, he's, I believe he's involved in higher dimensional mathematics. He's very hard sciences, materialistic, famous mathematician. And he said, and this is where I started to open, my mind up even further, was listening to him say that mathematics proves there are higher dimensions. That tripped me out completely at this point because going back to the random number line with imaginary real numbers and never realizing that, I never realized these things about mathematics. I just said, oh, there's an eye next to a four. I don't really care. It didn't mean

anything to me. Now it meant something to me because it meant that we can mathematically prove something that we haven't observed. It logically checks out. It scales. And for some reason, that tripped me out, and I got really excited. Well, Sir Roger Penrose started to explore consciousness because of these things about higher dimensions. And his theory is that consciousness somehow communicates with microtubules in the brain. I cannot go into more detail on that because I don't know.

But what I'm trying to say is that I'm trying to draw the bridge of how I got to consciousness and how then this started to take another level. And so I started to look into consciousness. And I thought it was so cool because I never thought about anything other than material. Though I did have my connection, my personal connection to God. I still was very in the material. And so after I started looking into consciousness and all these different things, I'm balancing my studies at Georgetown, balancing this. And then I start to take this newfound worldview, right, or view of things into studying about China, which I was trained, well, not trained officially, but I was a China specialized intelligence analyst.

that was my career goal to bring my background, my understanding of the China-U.S.-China relations into a foreign policy or national security career. While I was looking up different things about China, all of these different memories came back of my studies in China and undergrad, where I learned about China's ancient China, about their system, their measurement of, well, the way they perceive time, the ebb and flow of, civilization, the cycles, and a series of things started to, I started to realize there were a lot of congruencies between U.S. and China in certain aspects, sorry, my stomach. Longer to. In certain aspects, whereas I had seen it from like a very, like a very, like a very bipolar world, U.S. and China being very different to different systems, that started to not converge in the sense that, oh, you know, we're the same system, we're the same culture, not like that.

It was that I started to see that really we were, or I started to receive information or an understanding that we were just two ways of organizing society competing to become the primal order of society. there's being more top down and ours being what I didn't realize it. I mean, it's a mixture, but more bottom up process. And as I started to realize these things, I reflected on my classmates. I reflected on what we do around the world and also my experience and intelligence. And I wondered for a split second, I thought to myself, how did we make it this far? I swear, I don't know what happened because I wasn't looking up aliens, but I swear that I looked up the nuclear, something with nuclear. I started looking at nuclear, the nuclear bomb and like how that happened and why, and the reasons in the background, because I didn't have any insight into that. But I had these, if these things pop up on my Google feed, which naturally came up about UAPs being around nuclear facilities. and I started to get a different message

because for the first time it was very plausible to me that non-human intelligence were intervening in human affairs in a joking manner because I said to myself, I don't know how we're going to make it out of this, knowing what I knew about the China situation

and with MAD mutually destruction and things like that. And the second that I started to entertain that, well, that's where my mental health right now, right, I'm rapid firing my mental health, like, I'm not my mental health, but all the information that I'm gathering, all of the patterns and putting together. But at this point, now I'm starting to feel nervous, nervous, because now suddenly I'm reading about the nuclear

war situation scenario. And I'm knowing what I know about the United States and China relations being very contentious. I start to, actually, my heart rate starts going up. And I'm kind of joking, like maybe there are non-human intelligence, but then I start panicking because I, I'm hoping, part of me is nervous, right, because if I'm starting to entertain this, but I'm also kind of hoping that there is some kind of divine intervention or something that would help mitigate against this. And as the next few days, this goes all the way until October, so this start in September, it goes towards the end of October, I had a at this point, felt like I was losing my mind because I was continuing to have weird experiences that were inexplicable.

So one being, I would stand in the kitchen and I dropped something. The light flickered and I heard an electrical sound and it disappeared. What'd you drop? Like Tupperware top. And just did you ever find it? Yes, I did. So I didn't jump to the conclusion right away that it felt. through the sink, the kitchen sink, because when it happened, I said, I looked at myself.

I said, I'm by myself at home. He's at work. I said, stop. I said, no, I'm crazy. And I say, stop. Does your husband know how you're feeling about things at this point? Oh, yeah. Okay. He's, he's here in studio sitting off the side. So you're by yourself, but he understands that there's things going on right now. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Because you weren't hiding it from him. No, because I'm realizing. I know this is, but I need to balance it off of someone because I am losing grip with reality. And as when I turn around and I'm turning around like this because I said there's no way this just happened. I turn around in my coffee, my curig, it's sitting perfectly on top of my curig.

Instantaneously. Like this was something that like it wasn't a period of time that went by. Like it happened in a moment, you turn, you look and sit in over there. Yes. Wow. And the light flickered and everything. First, these feel like memories, but their thoughts that just pop up my head. The first thought was a scene from Stanley Kubrick 2001 where they have, it's implied there

are aliens in the background when the astronaut, I forgot his name is in like a French, it looked French dress room. And then the other one, this scene from Goodwill Hunting. Have you seen Goodwell Hunting? I haven't. there's a scene where Goodwill hunting, Will, he's a genius, he's a janitor

at, I believe it's MIT, and he solves a- This is Matt Damon? Yeah. Yeah, I see it, yeah. So there's a scene where he's with the girl in the toy store, and he says, want to see a magic trick,

and he takes a bunch of jacks and throws him behind him. But in the scene in my head, right after I lost something in the sink, that scene pops up, except in my head, it pops up. And when he threw them back, they disappeared.

here. And the thought, something says to me saying, you expect it and then it's there. So what you expect will be there. And that trip, that was weird because I don't know what that meant. I didn't know what that meant. And I'm sitting there in my, like my head, I'm losing my mind. So I didn't think right away either that, oh, it really happened, right? This really happened. I thought maybe I had just glitched out for a second, maybe tired or something, disassociated, and something happened. And that's certainly plausible. But the weird thing is that I had instant realizations that were very logical. I mean, in relation, logical questions, I mean, right? In relation to the observer effect of why we see the double slit experiment. I don't know if you've seen that.

With quantum. Yeah. Or it's like when you're looking at it, it does one thing when you're looking at it, when you're not does another thing. Yeah. Yeah. And, and I mean, it's a great question. We're still asking that question. But it wasn't, you know, it wasn't on top of my mind that I'm trying to solve this or ask these certain questions. But after this, I started to feel like I'm going crazy. Well, fast forward to, okay. Let me just ask you. So just for clarification, in that moment when that happened, it wasn't it was something where you were trying to you were thinking you went crazy you were going crazy and it wasn't beyond the realm of possibility in that moment in your in your thought process

that that you you placed that over there and you just don't remember that was in the realm that was in the realm that's why I didn't jump and I still like I'm not entertaining any anomalous phenomenon even though I said oh maybe they're NHI I'm still thinking in a material sense. Yeah, so you're like, I must have done that. Yeah. Yeah. And I just don't remember it because I'm going crazy. Gotcha. But this new question about the observer effect made me go back to my computer and look at different videos on the observer effect and different theories. And that question still stood. I said, that's a really interesting question. I'm not, you know, I don't go, I don't have any more on that. But I just, every time I had a realization, unrelated,

even if I'm thinking I'm going nuts, but I thought that was a valid question. I would still go back and apply that to actual my studies or to wanting to figure something out. Well, about a week or two later, so this is around beginning of October at this point, 2021, still my first semester, around October 25th weekend.

This was Thursday night. I was ready. I was deep diving in all of these different topics related to consciousness, philosophers, social sciences, and even some basic, like linear algebra and things. And there was a logical basis for this. It was because I was still entertaining, leaving my program to go into physics,

and linear algebra was part of the core math classes I had to take for that. So I just wanted to make sure that I wouldn't be going in blind, that I could actually hold my own in, in a hard sciences program. Well, Thursday night of the weekend of October 25th hits, and I'm on my computer, and I'm on YouTube. And I'm impulsive at this point, which is really weird in hindsight. It wasn't at that point.

And I clicked a video instantly, random video that was on my suggested feed. And it was a video about these K-pop artists, nothing related in my studies, K-pop artists having to hide their relationships from the public because if they're if they're found out to be in a relationship they are targeted they're hated and they're threatened that they're treated this way and it was a weird video but in the middle of the video it would glitch out randomly and this wasn't a this wasn't this one it was without question it was glitching out like someone had I thought maybe, I didn't know what it was. Maybe it was a government had put something on my feed and it would go staticy randomly

and weird symbols would pop up on my video. Like what kind of symbols? Weird symbols. Like, you know signs, the movie, the G, that kind of symbol. I try to determine because I mean, remember what I told you earlier about the guy that went to the aircraft in the unknown language that he had, I wonder if it was something similar. So this is popping up on your screen.

So you have this K-pop video going, and then it's interrupted by this, and then it goes back to K-pop. How long was it on the screen? It would glitch in every, like, randomly. So it was real fast, like flashes. Yeah, but it was enough that I could see it. So it would go, like, you hear the status.

you sound and you see a little staggy. You see the video still going in the background and that symbol would pop up. And now that's it. You made me crazy. I'm crazy now because I'm already in, you know, doing, balancing all these different subjects for logical reasons, but also of interest because what I was reading about, like people like Aristotle, people from back in the day who just studied whatever they wanted, didn't have to specialize.

But also personally, because I'm about to leave into my physics. program and walk away from a whole career in foreign policy and national security. And so now I just like completely see this. I'm done. I said I need help. I need help because I'm losing my mind. Initially, right? I'm losing my mind. Why am I seeing this weird symbol? At this time. Did you have any thoughts in those moments where you feel like you're losing your mind as to a trigger event to that? Did you? Did you ever think, like, was there ever a thought, like, I'm losing my mind because of something, whether it was like a loss in the family or something? Or was it just like completely just random? You're losing your mind and you don't know why. I'm losing my mind because I'm delving into topics that I don't normally delve into. And I'm feeling like I'm starting to put something together and put my finger on something that I can't explain.

and then also I'm having these glitched out. I've never had experiences glitching out, doing all these different things. So all of these different events are making me feel like I'm losing my mind. And this one, I just said, forget it. Forget it. Because at this point, you know, I'm still considering I'm losing my mind, things like this.

This point, it's, I cannot deny it with my own eye that there's an external influence on my environment. and that's what freaked me out. I lost it. And I would take medication at that point. I said, I just need to figure out. So I called someone, I actually right before I started Georgetown, I was an intern at the Defense Intelligence Agency with a special operations division.

And that was in the summer of 2021. So I had some of their numbers, their hireups that work there. People who were chief foreign officer five. We have a colonel, a full bird who is an army psychologist. just I try to get a hold of him. And the reason why is because this was esoteric enough to make me feel like it warranted reaching out to him. And what I mean by that is that we had a passing conversation. I didn't even read the whole thing on Project Stargate, but we had a passing conversation about remote viewing where I asked him. I said, like, what is this?

Right? It's weird. That's it. And then we moved on. And so, This felt that it was weird enough to be in that domain of consciousness, but also I need mental health. And Army, that guy was perfect, considering he was a DIA special operation psychologist who knew about project starting it. So I tried reaching him. I called him. And I told him that I feel that I'm figuring something out about consciousness. I was wondering if I can meet with him and ask him some questions. But I'm very speedy right now because I'm, I need him. help, right? It's undeniable. So he tells me to calm. First of all, he's seen me work, so he knows that I'm a highly capable person and disciplined, good at my job. And he's seen me

in action, right? So it's not like I'm someone random hooking off the street and is starting to act like borderline looks maybe paranoid schizophrenic. That's what I felt like. And he just tells me to calm down, you know, be careful because if you push yourself, He says something, he said something about having creativity and a linear, like, logical mind. If you, you can push yourself into a psychotic state. He said something around those lines. But I didn't stop because I felt like I was on to, I felt like I was on to something. I said, I just want to know. I actually didn't care. I looked crazy at that point. I just want to know if there's something to con, something to what's going on that can be explained because it feels.

very real. And while I'm aware that these are indications of mental health problems, I wasn't fully convinced of it because of my critical, the process of my critical thinking and other things of that nature. When I think of mental health, I'm like, you're on a different, you're somewhere else. That's what I thought. And that's also, I believe, a misconception on my part. after speaking to different people who've had mental health issues and going through it myself. Well, anyway, he didn't meet with me. He spoke to me on the phone and I moved on. This was before, and I have to go back, sorry, that was before the Thursday night where I saw that video and things started glitching out. So when that happened, it seemed crazy that it was external influence.

And there was a little, right, possibility in my mind, but I wasn't entertaining it that the U.S. government is doing some kind of program on me. Because I only had a passing idea of remote viewing. I didn't know in detail exactly what it was. Well, Friday morning hits and I decide I'm going to go to psychological services at Georgetown because they have free services. that way I can get help and then continue my studies, whether that be in physics in George Mason or continuing at Georgetown. When I leave my house Friday morning, I go to, I'm in McLean, Virginia, and I'm turning at the light to go onto the highway to go to D.C., I see a blocked out government vehicle, government license plates, passed by me. Perfect timing, right?

passed by me. I don't know why it felt very weird, but not too weird, because logically I live in McLean, Virginia, and I live near all the government buildings, and the CIA is down the road. So there's, you know, it's weird, felt weird because I'm going through something weird, but it's not weird. And anyway, I continue on. Well, as I'm continuing on, you have to remember I'm balancing all these different thoughts, but, Going back to my thoughts about nuclear war were still something that were, it felt very, like I had to tell someone. But I needed to figure out my thing first as well, like the consciousness, my mental health. But I felt that I also had to eventually tell someone from the U.S. government or figure something out that would prevent a potential nuclear war between the United States and China.

Because I didn't see a way out of the current situation. I believe that nuclear war. was going to be the, what's going to happen. When was this? What year was this? 21? Okay. Yeah, so I'm driving and I get to D.C. I get off the highway in Washington, D.C. I'm at the red light. There's a little gap between me and the red light, but I'm the first car. There's no car in front of me between me and the red light. There's, I don't know if it's the same U.S. government vehicle, but there's another, probably another one, I don't know, blacked out.

government license plate. And we're at the red light. He's in the left lane and my lane can go front or left. He pulls right in front of me at the red light. Like it cuts you off? Not gentle, but he goes in front of me. And I see, that's when I see that it's a U.S. government vehicle. And that was weird for me. So let me just get this straight before you going further. We're talking like an intersection as a former truck driver. I think I can picture this. But you're both making a left-hand turn, and there's two lanes for the left-hand turn, but your lane is the right lane, which is straight or turn left. He's in the left lane, and he comes up next to you and then goes into your lane in front of you, right?

And you said there was nothing in front of you at the time, right? It was just you and then the light. Okay, gotcha. So it was very deliberate. Gotcha. And when the light turns green, he still goes left. why would you come into my lane that goes straight or left if you're in the left lane and you were still going to go left? So he turns left and I am at the light just what's going on.

But I feel like my course is shifting right there. Like I had planned to go to Georgetown Psychological Services, but now I feel that I have to follow this vehicle. So it was like a feeling that you had? I had a feeling. Like a deep feeling? A deep feeling. At the end of the day, it felt that I have to follow this car. I have to.

I have to find out. But you don't know what you're trying to find out. No. No. I'm just nuts. But, you know, I didn't care at that point. I said, I know. At the end of day, no one's going to come and be like, you know, you have mental problems.

I wouldn't be like, how dare you? Like, I'm very well aware, which is very interesting. I'm very well aware at this point. That's very interesting because usually people with mental, mental health issues are the last ones to realize that they're crazy, you know? And so like the fact that you're so willing to say, I know I'm crazy means you're probably not crazy. That's me not wanting anyone to surprise me about, I'm like, I know who I am, right? I'm very aware. I got you. So I go down and I say, okay, just follow the car. And he goes, right? So I lost him. And we're basically

making a U.E. going back on the highway to go to back to Virginia from D.C. I think it's a different highway because there's like one that goes horizontal from Alexandria to Arlington to McLean. It's that one that feels like it's parallel to the water of D.C. where Georgetown is. And when I'm on the highway going back to Virginia, I lost him and I hear something say go faster. So I put my gas on the pedal and I think to myself, this is nuts. this is so nuts that I'm just going to give this one shot and I'm going to get off the exit, the first exit. And if I don't see any government vehicle, I'm just going to turn back around and make a B-line for psychological services at Georgetown. While I get off on the Arlington, Virginia exit,

and I'm in the left lane, ready to go on the bridge and pop a Ui. I don't see the government vehicle. There is a normal gray vehicle in front of me, like a private vehicle, normal license plate, not a marked, no U.S. government. Left lane, its right blinker is on. A little extraordinary, or out of the ordinary, but whatever, I at this point don't want to look crazier than I already feel, so I just want to turn around. While this guy, the driver, has his right blinker, he's the only one in front of me. He puts his left hand out the window for me to follow him. I feel that I need to follow him. and so I follow his car when the light turns green. He pulls into the parking garage of, I didn't know,

I didn't even know there was a, like, Virginia Hospital Center. I didn't know where I was going. I was just following him. But it was Virginia Hospital Center. And. Can I ask? So take me back to this intersection here where this happened. I'm having a hard time picturing this situation.

So you have a great civilian car in front of you, right? And is it another situation where you're making a left-hand turn as two lanes that can go left? No, I'm in the very left lane because I'm planning to go back on the highway. And so there's a civilian car in front of you. And that's the car that this guy's in? Mm-hmm. Okay. Okay.

So you're saying the guy who puts his hand out the window is in the civilian car in front of you. And he has his right turn signal on in a left-hand turning lane. Gotcha. I just wanted to make sure I understood. Yes. And that kind of, well, between the U.S. government vehicle and that kind of what appeared, what I believe to be some kind of tradecraft. There's something called surveillance detection reconnaissance or surveillance detection route, SDR. SDR in human intelligence and counterintelligence is you are either the person being followed by surveillance or you are surveillance following a specific person.

and you do different maneuvers. I didn't learn anything related to this, but I just assumed because I saw U.S. government vehicles because I had a little bit of training in the summer internship. And I'm not sure who else is going to do something like this. So I assume automatically maybe it's a U.S. government program. So I follow them. And I follow him, go to Virginia Hospital Center, coming from intelligence and working in skiffs. you're not a lot of have your phone.

I'm assuming I might be going to some special program that might be masked in a civilian facility. I don't know. I mean, that was the most logical explanation. I'm going through a really wild experience. And so I leave my phone in my car and the guy parks and then I follow him to the elevators that would go up to the main hospital.

And while we're waiting, I'm quiet because this feels super top secret. it. Mind you, we have a lot of rules for spying on American citizens, even though we know that the government spies on us because Snowden, yeah. I know, surprise. I didn't see, we don't, this is like, still we're not believing it in intelligence because we got so many normal people can't do. I can't just look up anyone. You can't do that. That would have to be some kind of program, FBI, law enforcement. And so it's not, you know,

it's not on my bingo car that the U.S. government is spying on me personally, especially because I'm no one and I work in the government. And if they were, then it's a special program. Because now maybe I'm looking into consciousness. I don't really know what's going on. So I leave my phone and I leave all my technology, whatever I have in my car, I go follow him, thinking I'm going to go to a facility. I'm quiet because I feel that maybe they'll give me information when I'm in the program. And I'm quietly standing next to him. There are normal patients in the hospital, some mom with her kid, and she presses the elevator button. And the guy says to me, says, the elevator button says it's going down. But when you press it,

it actually just goes up. There's no going down here. And I laugh it off. But I feel like I'm being tested a little bit, right? So I'm kind of quiet. This is the guy that you followed there. That says it to you. Yeah. It seems like a movie. This really does. This feels like a movie to me. So you, yeah, so I'm losing, I'm well aware that this is nuts and I feel that I'm entering. I don't even know what's going on. I follow him to the second floor and he brings me to, you know, there are different offices. There's orthopedics, different, it was orthopedics. He brought me to that office. I just follow him. He's not talking to me like this is business as usual. It's a very weird situation. And I follow him to this office where there are people waiting in line to get seen in. the front desk. He sits, he plants himself in one of the seats in the waiting area, and I don't know what to do. So I go and I stand in line trying to be normal because it feels like a test. So you're standing in line, but you have no idea why you're getting there. I have no idea

what I'm going to do. I'm winging it at this point. And also, I know my end game is, at the end day, I'm just going to go get mental health help, right? So it's not that I'm operating with no plan B or the logical plan that's still at play. It just looks like the course kind of changed a little bit. While I'm waiting in line, the guy says to me, and he's sitting like this, which makes me feel like I'm being played a little bit. And he says to me, what are you going to just wait in line? And so I felt this was another test.

So I bypassed the line and there's a door to go into all the different patient where you can be seen. So I said, screw it in my head. And I go through the door. I just really want to know what's going on at this point, right? So I go through the door and no one says anything. I go around, there's like a round area. And the front desk is circular. So you can be seen from inside.

Maybe if you're leaving one of the patient offices from within, you can check out. But I go there and I try to check myself in. No one says it. There's just another woman sitting at a computer at the front desk. It's just rounded out. So you have the front office. And then you have the door right here. And you can go around to this part of the desk.

And she asked me, who are you here to see? So I'm winging it still, right? And also kind of thinking it's a test by some element of the government. I think about it. And I, like, the only person I spoke to who was a doctor was that army psychologist. So I name, I give his name. And she responds to me saying, We don't have anyone who works with that name here.

So I say, oh, okay. I must be at the wrong office. Now I just feel like I'm being played completely. I'm losing it, right? I'm either being played or losing it or both. So I make a beeline out of the office back to where I came from. I see the guy sitting in there, smirking, laying back, just. Does it make eye contact with you?

Yeah. And he's smirking at you. Yeah. And I'm annoyed. So there's like real attention here. Like, I mean, it's not like. at some point, there's almost like a relationship that's being built here. You know, it's not just a random person.

This is somebody that, you know, he's making eye contact with you. He's interacting with you. There is this relationship of some kind being built between you and him. I still don't know. There was intention to what he was doing. And at this point, I didn't even want to hear it anymore. I don't want to look any more stupid or crazy than I already feel. I know I look.

So I leave. I look at him. I smile. I leave. I ignore him. I walk down the stairs and I'm making a beeline. I don't know where. I'm just going straight for to find wherever behavioral health was. And I see behavioral health unit sign. I turn and it's the elopement zone. So an elopement zone is sort of like an in-hospital prison for mental health patients. I didn't know that at the time. To me, it looked like a skiff. It's very bar, barricing. door. It's a very heavy door. And there's a phone in front, which is really similar to a skiff. And I pick up the phone. I dial zero. I don't know why I call. I didn't even know you could dial zero. I assume. Call a woman picks up and asks, how can I help you? And I say to her that I just feel like I have to be here. I have to be seen. She comes out very perplexed because it's not standard for people to call in on the patient to call in on the phone. I'm assuming. And so she brings me to the front desk of the lobby of the hospital where you do initial taken, not just for a specialist, but for just general. And she has me wait out there,

brings me, tells me to wait to be seen by the front desk so that I can check in. And then she leaves. So I'm sitting there waiting and then eventually check in with him. It's empty in that area the waiting area, and I go back to sit down to wait to be taken in the regular, where they do initial checkup and registration. It's a small room. While I'm waiting, and then I hear Michaela, or Michaela, right, similar to my name. I wasn't sure if it was my name, because when I turn to look, another woman is going into the office. And then I hear McKellah, and I don't remember if they said my last name.

the woman stops and she's looking at me. It feels, right? It's weird. I'm not doing well at this point. So you're saying this woman, when the name Michaela is called out, gets up, starts walking. Do you hear McKella then a second time?

Yeah. And the second time it's McKella, not Michaela? I don't remember. Okay, okay. And you don't remember if it was last name or not. but it was called twice, and the second time was while she was already walking. Mm-hmm.

And then... And she's stalling. So if it was her, she should be... They're calling her. Was there anybody else in there waiting other than you two? Mm-mm. Okay. Interesting.

So I follow her into the room. So I follow... I follow her into the room. This is a marvelous journey you're on. I mean, this is... This is wild. This is like just a date. trip of just crazy town. Yeah. Yeah. Great. And so I follow her into the room and I'm sitting,

she's sitting in this seat. I'm sitting across from her. What, at a table? She, no, not a table. Oh, it's like a waiting room? Yeah, the patient seats. And she's sitting there and I'm sitting across from her. She looks a little uncertain. I'm definitely uncertain. I'm not knowing what's going on, but they're ignoring me. She's being seen by the nurse who's checking her and I'm sitting there. And they're ignoring me like it's business as usual. So I'm really, it's pushing me, right? This is all pushing me. But I sit there and just go with it because I said, I already know I'm crazy.

I don't need to make myself look more crazy. I'm not going to sit there all frantic or whatever. And so I'm sitting there and she's being seen. Now I think I'm either crazy or the government. I certainly feel the government's playing a game on me, especially with that guy in the beginning. Let me ask you about that real quick. You said that several times about the idea that you felt like the government playing a game with me.

With your background, was that something, forget the idea that I'm going crazy. With your background, is that something that is a plausible option? Because earlier I brought up the idea of the UAPs and how the government could be possibly maybe rolling those out on purpose on their own soldiers to test flight. So that's my perspective. But from your perspective, let's just say you're not crazy. Your background says what? Is that a plausible, logical thought? It is at this point because I'm having external influences.

My laptop, that video, the weird glitching, knowing just briefly that they even dabbled in remote viewing. Which I felt was just they were playing games. I thought that was a sigh up. No, that's very real. I actually met one of the guys. Now I know. I thought it was a side.

But the point is that they were still playing. It was still something, right? And then the intentionality, the U.S. government vehicle coming in front of me, the guy bringing me to the hospital, telling me to do certain things. Now I think that maybe this is just an undercover CIA facility or something. And I'm sitting there waiting. They're ignoring me. well, something has she, the woman, the nurse who is taking in this girl went into the other room really quick, the back room.

And I say, screw it. I'm going to just check myself in. If they want to play games, then I'm in control. I'm going to do everything. I don't care at this point because now I feel that I'm being played by someone. Because I know I'm crazy, right? I know this is crazy. And I'm certainly okay if they sat me down and help me. like the crazy person I am. I'm a crazy patient. I should be helped like when I shouldn't be left to do all this stuff. Right. So me, either way, no one, someone's not doing what they're supposed to be doing. And I'm fed up at this point. So I go on the computer that has all the medical data. I didn't care about anyone else. I went to register myself because I said that's it. I'm going to, I'm going to help myself. So you hop behind a computer that's there. You're dang right. I did. Okay. I did. And the nurse. This is like a, this is like a, this is like a movie. movie. I don't hear some of you on camera. I just... Yeah. Oh, we had journeys. I don't know if we

have enough time for all of these journeys. I'm, listen, I'm here for it. So let's just keep it going. Like, this is, I just, I keep coming back to this sounds like a Jason Bourne movie or something, you know, just like this process of revelation that that's coming. Honestly. And the boldness that you're acting in, because I can see the thought process in it where it's like, I know I'm crazy. So I'm going to do some crazy things until I get the help. And so it's just like, let's just do it. I'm going to do their job for them.

Which is kind of crazy. I'm not sitting there like taking my hands off and woo. I'm like, I'm going to go get the help I need if no one's going to sit here and help me. It's either, I felt it was U.S. government was part of it. And also people not doing their job. I shouldn't be, if it wasn't the U.S. government, I shouldn't be able to walk around and do all these things.

if I'm having a mental health crisis. It makes me uncomfortable, frankly, because if I had a child in a room or something and you have these mental health patients unpredictable who need help walking around like me at that point, either way, it's someone, I need to be seen, right? Logically. And I'm fed up at this point, so I want to be seen.

So I go, I register myself. I don't know what I'm doing, but I'm trying to figure it out. The nurse comes in and she says, what are you doing? Next up in overtime. It started in the hospital. Really? Yes. And I felt that there was something slipping in and out of me spiritually.

And how can I explain this? It felt like a serpent. And I didn't grow up religious. It felt like a serpent where it felt that it feels like an ego. It feels like I'm better than everyone else, that kind of feeling. But it doesn't feel like me because I don't normally feel like that. And in fact, I had anxiety and insecurities. But it would slip in and it felt, it knew exactly what it was doing,

and then I would feel it leave. And it didn't feel good. It felt scary. So it was like a demonic oppression. Instead of going in, it's almost like their fangs are in you, and it's getting a hold of you and oppressing you, which is something that, you know, I've experienced, and a lot of people have experienced. I woke up and heard a demonic voice.

Very demonic, not serpent-like, I don't know. Just you know it's evil. And it told me I have to sacrifice my husband. Wow. And I woke up and I was panicking and scared because I heard it right here, and then I heard it move, and I could feel it pointing,

and I could feel it's very just not. it's all kind of how you would picture like a hunched over crooked witch or something. That's how it kind of felt like a brouja. And then it pointed at my husband and I woke up and I said no, no. In a world full of content, better that you influence on those who most they want. They're of the people most important in our lives. The abuelos,

abuelos influencers, those who have comeed well and now are very well. They've been have been have been a lot of

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